December 20, 2025 • 33 mins
In today’s episode of Reddit Stories Podcast, a wild Karen completely loses it. You won’t believe how this one ends! Sit back, relax, and enjoy this binge-worthy Reddit Stories Podcast, featuring Karen freakouts, entitled people stories, and pro revenge tales.
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📌 **Every episode dives into trending Reddit stories, insane Karen freakouts, and dramatic pro revenge stories! We cover the wildest situations from r/EntitledPeople, r/AITA, and r/EntitledParents. If you love binge-worthy podcast compilations, long-form storytelling, and Reddit drama stories, you’re in the right place!
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Enjoyed this story? Follow the show and leave a quick rating.
🎧 Listen to More Reddit Stories Podcast Episodes Here:
👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5ZVzMm0Pr3bwlM26VuVv8J
👉 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mr-redder/id1516821033
📌 **Every episode dives into trending Reddit stories, insane Karen freakouts, and dramatic pro revenge stories! We cover the wildest situations from r/EntitledPeople, r/AITA, and r/EntitledParents. If you love binge-worthy podcast compilations, long-form storytelling, and Reddit drama stories, you’re in the right place!
👉 📺 Love These Stories? Watch Full Video Episodes on YouTube! → https://www.youtube.com/@MrRedderYT
🎵 Music Credit: https://soundcloud.com/lakeyinspired
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories-podcast-mr-redder--5571651/support.
Enjoyed this story? Follow the show and leave a quick rating.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oohoo, I love your dog. I want him, give him
to me. Let's get it.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey there, mister Redder here and you girl, young Karen
in the house. Welcome back to another episode of Reddit
podcast Stories. Our first story will be reading today you
want my dog?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Well.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
I think it's fairly safe to assume I've lost a
couple of friends over this, but it wasn't me who
caused it. This weekend, a friend of mine asked me
to keep an eye on her two kids while she
and her hubby went away for the weekend for some
couple time. Her mother was initially going to watch the kids,
but fell through on short notice. She called me at
three pm on Friday to come over in three hours,
(00:43):
and my friend knew I probably wasn't doing anything, which
was both hurtful and accurate, So I said sure. She's
got two kids, a daughter who's eight and a son
who's five. They're good kids for the most part. The
boy has a little bit of a snitching problem and
the girl has a sharing problem.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
But it's two days. So I show up Friday.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
After work while my friend gives me the rundown and
her husband tells them to behave The parents leave and
it's just me and the kids in the house, and
its immediate pandemonium. The brother snitches on his sister for
taking an extra cookie. The sister cries to me that
her brother messed with her switch, and I make the
executive decision that they've got too much energy and if
they're tuckered out, they'll hopefully chill. So I asked them
(01:25):
to go find their swimsuits because we're going to the gym,
which has a pool and a guest policy. I did
let mom know what we were up to before we left,
and asked if it was okay if I brought my
dog over. He doesn't shed Andy's house trained. She said
that was fine. Operation pool was a great success, though
the locker room did get a bit dicey.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
That's a whole other story.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Once everyone was appropriately tired, including me, we made a
pit stop on the way back to their house to
grab my pooch. He's extremely well behaved and he loves kids,
and both kids were immediately all about the dexter, and
the dexter was all about the kids. Ground rules, no
pulling on his fur, and he goes where he wants.
Kids kind of struggle with the notion that a dog
(02:06):
is not a toy. I obviously kept him out of
places where he wasn't supposed to go, but I'm a
grown up. Allegedly miraculously, after the swim and chasing the
dog around the house left the kids too poop to
pop and both fell asleep watching a Disney film on
the TV. After the movie, I woke the kids up
to trot off to bed and didn't make them brush
their teeth. For the record, the Sun did, indeed yeep
(02:29):
me under a bus when Mommy called in the morning.
I told the kid ows that if they left their
doors open, Dexter might sneak in and give them cuddles.
I increased the likelihood of this by sleeping on the
couch and not leaving him a spot. He expressed his
displeasure with me by flouncing off and going into the
Sun's room to sleep.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Great success.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Saturday, we went for a hike in the morning, had
a nap, and then played ball with a dog and
generally had a pretty chill day. Diffused the sharing issue
by explaining to the daughter that the pup has feelings
and wants just like any person, and she can't control
him that way. She appeared thoughtful, and then immediately started
yelling at her brother for hogging the dog again. At
least she wasn't mad at the dog. I successfully heated
(03:11):
up the cast role. Mom had left me for dinner,
following her carefully laid out instructions, admonished the kids to
not give him people food, and was soundly ignored. I
did draw the line at a couple morsels from each
kid and put my foot down. More than that, and
he's going to get the runs, and nobody wants that.
That night, I made sure Sis got a turn by
again hogging the couch and also closing the sun's door
(03:34):
since he got a turn already. The girl was smug.
The boy made me call his mom. Mom wasn't happy
that my dog was in her kid's beds. I reminded
her that he doesn't shed, and he can't smell worse
than the kids, and her daughter might burn the house
down with us inside it if she doesn't get a turn.
Mom accepted defeat. Saturday night was again relatively peaceful, though
(03:55):
toothbrushing did happen. Early Sunday morning, I got woken up
by having my dog's step on me, which is something
he's really good at and he was mad at me
for not leaving any room.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I made room.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Apparently the girl tried to do something he didn't like
and he noped out of there. She wasn't happy about that,
but was appeased by my pain enough to go back
to bed. This morning was relatively chill, some more playing
with a dog and some teen tug of war, and
mom and dad got back around lunchtime and thanked me
for keeping their kids in one piece. The kids said
bite to the pup, and there were tears, and I
(04:28):
loaded up myself and my dog and went back home
to enjoy the relative peace and quiet.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Yeah, I wish it ended there.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
Maybe an hour after we got home, I get a
phone call from a very frazzled sounding mom with kids
crying in the background. She says, they need my dog. Now.
I'm sorry what you don't need a dog? You need
my dog like I don't need to come back and
visit soon.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
You just want him.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Well, the kids got so attached and they won't stop
crying about missing the dog, and her and her husband
don't have time for two kids and a puppy, and
more guilt inducing word vomit that was having precisely zero
effect on me. Absolutely not click still getting texts about
being reasonable, and you have.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
Time to train a new dog.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Forty eight hours of free babysitting isn't enough you want
my dog to not in this lifetime? Am I the
jerk for telling my girlfriend she can't just take back
a replacement item she gave me after the lost item
was found. My girlfriend and I had a long debate
about this quite a while ago, and it still remains
a touchy subject in our relationship. Please weigh in situation.
(05:36):
My girlfriend lost my volleyball when she borrowed it during
one of our routine league nights. She offered to replace
it at no cost to me, since she acknowledged the
ball going missing was entirely her fault. True to her word,
she gifted me a new ball before our next league night.
Note she physically gave the replacement ball to me.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
And it was now in my possession. It's now my ball.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
When we got to our league later on, perhaps later
that day or the following day, I forget which. To
be honest, my lost ball had been found by the
staff and my girlfriend handed it back to me, at
which point she also said, I'm going to take back
the other ball now and when to take it from
my bag. I told her it wasn't okay for her
to do that and challenged her on that point. Her
(06:17):
point of view, According to her, as I was no
longer missing my original ball, so it was okay for
her to take back the replacement ball. She believes that
by returning my original ball, the dead is settled, and
since the replacement was no longer necessary for me to possess,
it was hers to keep now as she had paid
for it. My point of view, once you give something
to someone, you no longer have ownership of said item,
(06:40):
as the ownership has been transferred over to the recipient. Therefore,
what happens with that item from that point on is
not for the giver to decide.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
I believe that for her.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
To reassume ownership of something she has given away to
be a huge transgression on her part. Taking back a
gift is a big no no in my eyes. My
gripe is that I feel like she should have asked
for the replacement ball back rather than have assumed ownership
of it outright if I wanted to donate the ball,
or heck, even just keep it for myself, I feel
it would have been my prerogative to do so, not hers.
(07:12):
Now to clarify one, as she had given me the
ball as a replacement and the original ball had been found,
I feel the morally correct thing for me to do
would have been to offer the replacement ball back to
her as a token of her generosity in the first place. However,
she had robbed me of this opportunity by deciding to
take back the replacement ball before I could offer it
(07:32):
back to her. Two If she had purchased it but
had not yet physically given it to me before returning
my original ball, I feel she would have been within
her rights to keep the replacement as ownership hadn't been
transferred over to me through the act of giving So
am I the jerk update. My girlfriend and I are
currently reading the comments together and we're having an absolute laugh.
(07:53):
We didn't anticipate such a high volume of responses over
one thousand. At this point, she feels validated. There were
definitely lots of points for us and me in particular,
to reflect on. I can't get back to everybody, but
I will be responding to as many as I can
in the next few days. Also, not that it matters much,
but the volleyball is worth ninety Canadian dollars to those
(08:14):
mentioning autism or mental health issues. I've already had some
concerns over being on the spectrum before. Categories and the
pedantics are things I worry and stress about very often,
much more than those around me. Thank you for pointing
that out and making room for this in the conversation.
Perhaps this is worth me looking into further. You're the jerk.
This relationship sounds exhausting. You're the jerk for making me
(08:37):
read the Tale of the Volleyball a trial in three acts,
and you're wrong. Obviously your item was lost, it was found,
You get your old item back.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Everyone's happy except you. Apparently.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
This isn't like if you ordered something on Amazon it
got lost. They sent you a replacement and your original
item came and they told you to keep both. This
is your girlfriend, though maybe not for long. I'm extremely
impressed you read that in its entirety. I only got
through the first couple of paragraphs and vaguely skin the
rest of the saga. Something something, I'm keeping all the
(09:11):
toys and you can't have any something something, Opie. I
cannot Imagine how tedious you must be in real life.
Your poor girlfriend must feel like she's presenting a defense
before the Supreme Court every time she makes the slightest error.
Your girlfriend already indemnified you by replacing your volleyball with
one of equal value. Indemnification does not equal excess. However,
(09:33):
you don't get to earn something on top of the replacement,
which you would if you kept both balls.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
You're the jerk.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Your girlfriend made a mistake, immediately rectified the situation, and
made the very reasonable assumption she'd get to have the
excess the second ball since it was not needed by you.
Your argument isn't logically sound. You know someone's a high
level of redditor when they use.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
In words like indemnification.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Oh come on, Karen. Not everyone can be uncultured swine
like us. Am I the jerk for not allowing my
neighbor to use my driveway. I thirty four female, have
been living in my current house for about four years.
It's a lovely neighborhood and I generally have a great
relationship with my neighbors. However, there's one neighbor, Dave forty five, male,
who has been causing some issues lately, and I need
(10:18):
some perspective on whether or not I'm the jerk here.
Dave and his family moved into the house next door
about a year ago. They have a narrow driveway that
can fit only one car, and their house doesn't have
much street parking available. This hasn't been a problem until recently,
when Dave started hosting large gatherings at his house. During
these gatherings, Dave's guests would park their cars on the street,
(10:40):
which would quickly become overcrowded. As a result, some of
his guests started using my driveway without asking for permission. Initially,
I let it slide because I didn't want to cause
any conflict. However, it began happening more frequently, and on
a few occasions I'd be unable to move my own
car when I had to go to work or leave
for my own business, forcing me to go to Dave's
(11:01):
house and play a guessing game for someone to move
their car. I decided to address the issue with Dave,
explaining that I didn't mind his guests occasionally using my driveway,
but I would appreciate it if he could ask for
permission first. Dave seemed understanding and apologized for the inconvenience. However,
the situation didn't improve. Dave continued to host gatherings and
(11:22):
his guests continued to use my driveway without permission. I
decided to take matters into my own hands and placed
a no parking sign in my driveway along with a
polite note asking Dave's guests to respect my property, also
with a warning that I'd have their vehicles towed. Last weekend,
Dave hosted another party and his guests were forced to
find alternative parking due to the sign. Dave confronted me,
(11:45):
saying I was being unreasonable and that I should be
more accommodating to his guests. He argued that it was
just for a few hours and that I was creating
unnecessary tension in the neighborhood. I stood my ground, explaining
that I had tried to address the issue politely and
that my drive boy is my private property. I added
that he should have respected my request for permission and
(12:05):
made better arrangements for his guests parking. Ever since then,
me and Dave have not spoken to each other, with
him and his family most of the time shooting me
a bad luck. So am I the jerk for not
allowing my neighbor to use my driveway for his guests,
despite having tried to address the issue politely.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Your whole question.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Boils down to Am I the jerk for wanting to
be able to go to work, run errands, and leave
in case of an emergency, even if it might inconvenience
someone attending a party I wasn't invited to. No, you
are not the jerk for not wanting to be stuck
at your house when a neighbor hosts parties you weren't
invited to. Am I the jerk for refusing to get
in the car with my mom. I'm twenty eight, female,
(12:45):
thirty three weeks pregnant, high risk, and on modified bed rest.
I can still do moderate exercises and run errands, but
mostly I'm meant to be sitting with my feet up
all day so I don't get sick again. My doctor
okayed me to continue doing my mile walks. My mom
and I went to our local park that had a
walking path. She drove her car. We got about one
(13:05):
eighth mile from the car, and I mentioned thinking of
changing the name I'd picked for the baby. It's been
an issue between her and I. I had settled on
a name, but in the last couple of weeks it
began to feel like the wrong name. I've been trying
out a few names. She's frustrated by my inability to
pick one. Anyway, I mentioned this, wanting to change the name,
and she had a visceral reaction. She growled, threw her
(13:28):
hands in the air, yelled at me, and turned around
and started storming off. I didn't realize what she was doing,
so I just stood there and watched. I thought she
was going to turn and come back. Instead, she stormed
to the car, got in, and drove away. Even if
I had realized what she was doing, I couldn't have
caught up with her.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
I can only waddle these days.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
I walked back to the parking lot, thinking she was
coming back and just messing with me. But five minutes
passed and she was still gone. My leggings don't have pockets,
so I didn't have my phone with me. I went
inside the community center, and fortunately there were some ladies
setting up for something, and I asked if I could
borrow a cell phone. I figured my mom would in answer,
so I called my grandfather, who lives ten minutes from
(14:10):
the park. He said he'd be right there to get me.
About the time my granddad parked, my mom pulled back
into the lot.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
She asked me.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Why I called my grandfather instead of her, and I
told her that she left me in a park without
a cell phone, so I borrowed someone's and called the
only number I had memorized that I knew would pick
me up. Mom told my granddad she was sorry we
had bothered him and that she had taken me home.
I told her I wasn't getting in the car with her,
and she was crazy if she thought I was. She
(14:38):
asked why, and I told her, you left your eight
and a half month, high risk pregnant daughter in a
park without a cell phone on an eighty five degree
day over something as stupid as naming a baby that
isn't even due for another seven weeks. She won't even
know her own name for months. It literally doesn't even
matter yet, but you let it become a whole drama.
(14:58):
My granddad drove me home. He gave my mom a
stern talking to when we got there. Mom is now
walking around acting like she's the victim because I embarrassed her.
She said I should have just got in the car
with her. She's only offered a half attempted apology, but
it was more of a sorry you feel the way
you do apology and not a real one. She says,
I'm overreacting. I'm writing this with the intent of showing her,
(15:21):
so I'll accept whatever judgment comes my way. If I overreacted,
I want to know it. Edit she did not know
that I didn't have my phone.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Am I the jerk? Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (15:33):
If your mom flips out this much before the baby
is born, think long and hard on if you want
to deal with that and more when the baby's coming
and after it's born, and decide if you want that
in you and your baby's life. Am I the jerk
for telling my coworker to stop using my personal belongings?
So I twenty eight female, have been working at this
small software company for about three years now, and I
(15:55):
genuinely love my job. I have great coworkers and the
work environment is generally positive. However, there's this one coworker,
let's call her Sarah. She's thirty two, who has been
increasingly crossing boundaries.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
A bit of background.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Sarah joined the company around a year ago and we
were initially friendly we would have lunch together occasionally and
chat about random things. I didn't think much of it,
and it seemed like a normal office friendship. However, over
time I noticed that Sarah had started to use my
belongings without asking for permission. For example, she would take
my stapler, pens, or even my phone charger without asking.
(16:32):
At first, I brushed it off as her just being
forgetful and not realizing that these were my personal items.
I tried to be understanding and not let it bother me,
but then things started to escalate. One day, I brought
in a special lunch I had prepared as a treat
for myself. It was a dish that my grandmother used
to make for me, and it had a lot of
sentimental value. I had placed it in the fridge with
(16:53):
a note clearly stating it was mine. When lunchtime came around,
I discovered that Sarah had taken and eaten my lunch.
I confronted her, and she apologized, claiming that she thought
it was meant for the whole office to share. I
didn't buy it, but I let it go to avoid
causing the scene. Over the next few months, Sarah's behavior
continued to worsen. She began using my personal laptop without asking,
(17:16):
even though we all have our own work computers. She
would also use my coffee mug and other personal items,
despite me having my name on them. I tried to
address it politely and asked her to stop, but she
would just laugh it off and say she didn't mean
any harm. Finally I reached my breaking point last week.
I had bought a new, expensive pair of headphones to
use at work, and I had left them on my
(17:37):
desk overnight. When I arrived the next day, I found
Sarah using them at her desk. I was furious and
asked her to hand them over immediately. She tried to
play it off as a joke, but I had enough.
I told her that it was not funny and that
she needed to stop using my personal belongings without permission.
I said it was disrespectful and a violation of my privacy.
(17:58):
The rest of the office heard the emotion, and some
of my coworkers agreed with me, while others said I
was overreacting and should let it go. Sarah hasn't spoken
to me since, and the atmosphere has become tense. A
few coworkers have even suggested that I owe Sarah an
apology for embarrassing her in front of everyone. So am
I the jerk for telling my coworker to stop using
(18:18):
my personal belongings?
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
The headphones and lunch were yours and not hers. While
I would argue using a stapler isn't harmful, it just
adds to everything else. What is most irritating about her
seems to be she tries to laugh it off and
carry on like she hasn't done anything wrong. Don't apologize,
wait for her to do that, Not the jerk. Speak
to your manager and or HR. The stapler and even
(18:44):
the charger are kind of reasonable, but the lunch, your
personal laptop, and your headphones are completely out of order.
Am I the jerk for not giving up my office
to be my wife's craft room. I recently brought this
issue up with a few friends of mine, and after
disagreeing on whether I was in the wrong, suggested I
post here some backstory. I twenty five male, met my
(19:06):
wife twenty six female, six years ago during college. We
got married after dating for two years because of visa issues.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
On her side.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Shortly after, I inherited the house we live in now
for my grandparents. Ever since then, we've lived here together.
I started a new job last year that allowed me
to work from home most days. Soon after, I turned
our main guest room.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Into my office.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
It's just slightly smaller than our master but has no
end suite. I admit I could have moved into one
of the smaller rooms, but was somewhat excited to have
my own space, complete with a three monitor desk, set up,
a comfy couch, and several shelves of figurines I've collected
and painted. As part of my job coding, I often
pace around the room for ideas, and looking at these
(19:49):
shelves that take up about half the room gives me
a lot of joy. Recently, my wife, who is a
very creative person and has dozens of crafty hobbies that
she jumps in between, outgrew her craft room that we
set up soon after moving here. It's about half the
size of our current office. We also have both a
large guest bedroom and another similar size small room that
(20:10):
we currently used mostly as storage. I recommended she used
the small room to set up a secondary desk in storage.
I figured this could be nice since she often has
several projects going on at once and would have to
store one away for the others. She, however, insists that
a bigger room would be the only real choice. Whilst
at first I tried to dissuade her from using the
(20:30):
guest room since there's no way we can cram all
the furniture in one of the small rooms, and I'm
also worried about when we have guests over and their comfort.
She seemed very happy with the decision. However, yesterday insisted
that I moved my office into one of the smaller
rooms and let her have my current room so that
our guests wouldn't have to sleep in a small space.
I disagreed vehemently, since I spent fifty hours a week
(20:53):
in my office and have spent countless hours decorating it
the exact way I wanted it. I also actually is
the extra space to be more effective and focused. Obviously,
now my wife is very angry with me and says
the only thing that will calm her down is if
I give her the bigger room. I don't think this
is something I can budge on, so read it. Am
I the jerk, not the jerk? You work fifty hours
(21:17):
a week in the room guests would sleep there infrequently,
and I don't know how many hours a week your
wife would spend on her hobby. Not the jerk, this
is your workspace for your income. She's being unreasonable. I
called the police on my neighbor after she keeped my
car because of the books that I write. I'm a
single woman in my early thirties making my living writing
(21:37):
and self publishing fiction novels. The genre I write has
a majority of the plot being steamy, so I typically
don't tell people what I write, but I do tell
them I write books for a living under a pen name,
and if you're questioning my writing abilities, I have an
editor to correct my mistakes. I'm not hiding it per se,
but I'm not telling everyone I meet what I do
for a living. And none of my neighbors knew, only
(21:59):
a bunch of friends. I live in a house alone.
Pretty much all of my neighbors are either young families
or retired couples. My next door neighbor is a young couple.
We've been polite to each other, but haven't been close
or anything lately. The husband, let's call him Roger, became
very friendly towards me, which I tried to ignore. But
he's been getting too flirty from my liking, and I
(22:20):
started to avoid him. They had a barbecue over the
bank holiday weekend and I was taking rubbish out to
put in my beIN. Roger looked at me, waved high,
and whispered something to his friend, and they both watched
me very carefully, which was incredibly creepy. On my way
through my garden, I saw Roger's wife, Dahlia, leaving the
house with her friend, and they both looked at me
(22:40):
with disgust and whispered something to each other. It was weird,
and I hurried back inside. The next morning, I found
some religious leaflets put through my letter box. They were
just printed on normal printer paper and warning about sinful
behavior and going to heck et cetera. Threw them away,
but kept finding similar leaflets put through my letter box
for the next week. Since I'm working from home, I
(23:02):
decided to see who's leaving these leaflets, and.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
To my surprise, it was Dahlia.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I decided to confront her and ask her to stop
putting religious leaflets through my door. Despite me being polite,
she was not happy. She told me that I should
rethink my life because what I write is disgusting. It's
pretty vanilla, and she found her husband secretly reading it
at night. She kept going on and on, how I'm
going to heck, how I have no morals, et cetera. Well,
(23:27):
I told her to stay away from me and discuss
this with her husband, and I closed the door in
her face. Don't know who, but someone told them what
I do for a living. A day later, I found
an insult painted on my door. A few days later
I caught her key in my car. She was almost
done with another insult. Well, I called the police honor,
and since I installed cameras after this incident, she's been
(23:49):
taken to court over keen my car. I talked to
my other neighbor, she asked about the police about it,
and she told me that I went overboard, that Dahlia
was clearly insecure. But she's a lovely woman and a
great mother, and I should have talked to her instead
of calling the police and given her a chance to
change her behavior. Am I the jerk for calling the
police and not giving Dahlia a chance? If she's key
(24:11):
in your car and painting rude names on your door,
she is not a lovely woman just because she doesn't
like what you write, doesn't give her the right to
destroy your property. It appears that the behavior was escalating,
so getting the police involved was necessary.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Am I the jerk for saying I'm not going to
take care of my pregnant girlfriend's baby when he's born.
I met my girlfriend several months ago. On our like
fourth date, she told me that she was pregnant from
her ex. I've been told by friends and family that
I should have left at that point, but I was
really dumb and really desperate at that time because it
was my first relationship, so I wasn't really thinking and
(24:45):
I went along with a relationship with her.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
I loved her.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
She was like a perfect match for me and other stuff. However,
it wasn't until this month that things started to be
a big problem. My girlfriend started talking to me about
paying for some baby stuff and what are ex spectation
was for me once the baby was born. We originally
had an agreement that it was only going to be
her and her ex. He's still around, He's not a
deadbeat that would be taking care of the baby. However,
(25:10):
she told me recently that her ex was out of
a job and doesn't even have a car and is
tight on money, so she expects me to help pay
for the stuff that she needs like diapers, baby clothes,
and whatever.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
I said. Forget that I did not agree to that.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
I might change a diaper a couple of times or
feed him once or twice, but I'm not going to
be fully taking care of him what on earth, especially
not spending money on baby stuff like I barely have
money myself. I'm nineteen years old. By the way, she
got mad because I said I wasn't going to help
her buy baby things and help her take care of
the baby after he's born. This was a big argument
(25:45):
that lasted for a long time. Am I the jerk here?
I'm going to probably go against the grain here, but
I'm going with not the jerk. As a single mom,
I don't expect anyone to step up and care for
my kid. That's mine and her father's job. I will
come positive male role models in her life, and if
they want to do extra for her, then I'm extremely
grateful for those actions, but I absolutely do not expect
(26:07):
them to fund any part of her life or take
on a parent role.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yep, not the jerk. Oh PI.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
She may have really liked you, but she was also
looking for someone to take her dead beat X's place,
and yes, he is a dead beat, no matter what
he says he's going to do. When the baby is born,
your girlfriend will stop being available to you and will
be full time taking care of a newborn baby. If
you stick around, you will be pulled into sharing responsibility,
and as soon as you've established a pattern of taking
(26:34):
responsibility for the kid, you can in some states in
the US not sure where you are, be made legally
responsible for child support. Even if you leave, you're going
to essentially lose your girlfriend to her baby, and you're
going to risk being sucked into child support for life.
If you stick around, do both of you a favor
and get.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Out of her life. You're the jerk.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Look if you ain't mad enough to be a father
to that baby, then quit wasting this girl's time. You
make it very clear that you you only want her
for one reason, and that reason is not to help
her with anything important in her life. I've dealt with
plenty of guys like you until I finally found the
right one who didn't mind that I have four kids
with different dads. My new man provides for all of
(27:13):
us because he is a real man who makes real money.
He also agreed to not marry me on paper so
that I can stay getting my benefits for me and
my kids. He even doesn't mind me getting with some
of my exes now and then because he is secure
in our relationship. I know he ain't happy about it,
but he knows it's important to me, so he doesn't
try to stop me. He respects my strong independence and
(27:35):
never tries to man explain anything to me. Let this
girl go so she can find out real man, cause boy,
you ain't cutting it. Won't replace a brand new broken lawnmower,
but will let me return and reorder.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
So I bought a riding lawnmower a few years ago
from a big home store. I paid for delivery, and
upon said delivery, it didn't start. The delivery truck had
left by the time I had gotten gas in it
and figured this out, so I called the store. I
explained that my brand new, just delivered today lawnmower was
not starting, and immediately the person on the phone asked
me if I purchased the extended warranty. I hadn't, so
(28:10):
they told me that it would cost one hundred dollars
to have them come get the lawnmower and then, however
much more the repairs were. Mind you, it was brand new.
In my mind, they should bring me a new one
to replace the one that didn't work upon delivery. No
matter how much I argued, this worker was sticking to
their story. I quickly changed my tactic and asked what
the return policy was. As long as a return was
(28:31):
initiated within thirty days, I could have a full refund,
including the cost of delivery, and the store would come
pick up the lawnmower for me at no additional cost.
So I pointed out that the store wouldn't replace my
non working item by taking one trip to my house
to pick up the non working one and bring me
one that worked, and instead would make two trips to
pick up the one that didn't work and then bring
(28:51):
me the new one I purchased the second time as
a totally different transaction. The worker said yes, and when
I tried to point out how that made no sense,
he didn't want to hear. So right then and there,
I initiated a refund. I then immediately ordered a new
one and had him set up the delivery date after
that date was set, we had to schedule the date
for pickup of the old mower, and I made myself
unavailable for any date other than the delivery date for
(29:14):
the new one. So, even though he had insisted they
wouldn't just bring me a replacement mower and pick up
the first one, they were now doing just that, but
with the additional paperwork of processing return and additional paperwork
for delivery of the new more The manager called me
later that day to apologize for the hassle, and they
ended up waiving my delivery fee. I worked at a
(29:34):
lows in customer service. It's atrocious, but I can confirm
that this type of crap is common. Most systems aren't
set up to process what you need done. We literally
had to return and then sell a new one to
set up delivery. Quite often we had set up in
exchange with a delivery and then just swap out the items.
Odds are that person was never trained for an exchange sale.
Ninety percent of the store I worked at wasn't trained
(29:56):
on doing one. Heck, a good ninety percent weren't trained
to do a return at all. Am I the jerk
for deciding to separate our finances just because my wife
refused to buy a pair of ear rings for my daughter.
My wife and I have one daughter from a previous marriage.
Each Mine is called pen she's fifteen, and hers is Amy,
she's seventeen. We've been married for ten years now. Our
(30:17):
finances are joint because we don't care for money. She
makes seventy to eighty thousand and I make one hundred
eighty K to two hundred K per year. She's in
charge of our finances. My wife has the weird fixation
on having the kids earn their stuff, and while I
agree both of our daughters are well behaved, good students,
and kind, I don't see why they have to earn
every single thing daily. For example, if my daughter is
(30:40):
working in the kitchen at night and goes to sleep
without putting her laptop away because she'll work again in
the morning, then my wife decides that she can't eat anything.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Sweet that day.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
I've voiced with better words that I find it stupid.
Same goes for her daughter. She's prone to forget things easily,
and if she doesn't remember to put this or that
thing away, my wife removes her phone or tees tablet.
Yesterday was my day off and I stayed back home
resting while my wife and our kids went out to
buy my mother in law mother's Day gift. Around five pm,
my daughter came to my room and said that my
(31:11):
wife bought Amy a necklace and when she asked for
a pair of ear rings she loved. My wife refused
because the night before she stayed up until late watching
Netflix when she knows she's not supposed to. This isn't
the first time my wife refuses to buy my daughter things,
and honestly, it boils my blood. My daughter is a
really good kid. I work hard to make sure my
family has every or most of the things they want,
(31:33):
just for my wife to tell them no because they
are kids being kids. When my wife came into our room,
I was honest. I said that her rule was utterly
stupid and I was done putting up with that. That
I don't particularly like her buying one thing for her
daughter while the other had nothing, and that until she
accepts to attend therapy with me and fix the problem,
our money will be taken care of separately, and the
(31:54):
joint account will be for the house and emergency matters only.
This means she now has to pay half of the
utilities and some other things. She didn't like it because
her money will be cut short and implied I was
financially mistreating her by doing this over a pair of
ear rings. She went to her parents, and my father
in law called me soon after. He said I was
a jerk and that it was my obligation to provide
(32:14):
for my family.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
ETA.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
I might not have explained myself. I'm still paying most
of our joint expenses, like sixty to seventy percent. But
before this, my wife kept almost all her money to
herself and only put toward the emergency fund we set. Still,
I put a bigger amount. She's not happy about us
separating our finances because this means she has to contribute
to the house now and she'll have less money for
(32:36):
her daughter's college fund and her fun ETA two. Thanks
for all your replies and comments. I'll try to read
all of them and we'll be answering some. I also
want to thank you for all of your advice. My
wife still refuses to do therapy, and as some of
you said, this will be my hill to die on.
If she doesn't agree by next Wednesday, I'm sure we
will divorce. Someone also asked for our ages. I'm thirty
(32:58):
six mail and she's forty five female.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Listen.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
This is extremely important. When you subscribe to a channel,
it tells YouTube that they're doing a good job and
it shares their content.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
With more people.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
So for that reason, if you are not subscribed to
our channel, please do it right now. Please please and
watch this video next, the one that popped up on
the screen.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
You're you're gonna love that one.
Oohoo, I love your dog. I want him, give him
to me. Let's get it.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Hey there, mister Redder here and you girl, young Karen
in the house. Welcome back to another episode of Reddit
podcast Stories. Our first story will be reading today you
want my dog?
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Well.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
I think it's fairly safe to assume I've lost a
couple of friends over this, but it wasn't me who
caused it. This weekend, a friend of mine asked me
to keep an eye on her two kids while she
and her hubby went away for the weekend for some
couple time. Her mother was initially going to watch the kids,
but fell through on short notice. She called me at
three pm on Friday to come over in three hours,
(00:43):
and my friend knew I probably wasn't doing anything, which
was both hurtful and accurate, So I said sure. She's
got two kids, a daughter who's eight and a son
who's five. They're good kids for the most part. The
boy has a little bit of a snitching problem and
the girl has a sharing problem.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
But it's two days. So I show up Friday.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
After work while my friend gives me the rundown and
her husband tells them to behave The parents leave and
it's just me and the kids in the house, and
its immediate pandemonium. The brother snitches on his sister for
taking an extra cookie. The sister cries to me that
her brother messed with her switch, and I make the
executive decision that they've got too much energy and if
they're tuckered out, they'll hopefully chill. So I asked them
(01:25):
to go find their swimsuits because we're going to the gym,
which has a pool and a guest policy. I did
let mom know what we were up to before we left,
and asked if it was okay if I brought my
dog over. He doesn't shed Andy's house trained. She said
that was fine. Operation pool was a great success, though
the locker room did get a bit dicey.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
That's a whole other story.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Once everyone was appropriately tired, including me, we made a
pit stop on the way back to their house to
grab my pooch. He's extremely well behaved and he loves kids,
and both kids were immediately all about the dexter, and
the dexter was all about the kids. Ground rules, no
pulling on his fur, and he goes where he wants.
Kids kind of struggle with the notion that a dog
(02:06):
is not a toy. I obviously kept him out of
places where he wasn't supposed to go, but I'm a
grown up. Allegedly miraculously, after the swim and chasing the
dog around the house left the kids too poop to
pop and both fell asleep watching a Disney film on
the TV. After the movie, I woke the kids up
to trot off to bed and didn't make them brush
their teeth. For the record, the Sun did, indeed yeep
(02:29):
me under a bus when Mommy called in the morning.
I told the kid ows that if they left their
doors open, Dexter might sneak in and give them cuddles.
I increased the likelihood of this by sleeping on the
couch and not leaving him a spot. He expressed his
displeasure with me by flouncing off and going into the
Sun's room to sleep.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Great success.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Saturday, we went for a hike in the morning, had
a nap, and then played ball with a dog and
generally had a pretty chill day. Diffused the sharing issue
by explaining to the daughter that the pup has feelings
and wants just like any person, and she can't control
him that way. She appeared thoughtful, and then immediately started
yelling at her brother for hogging the dog again. At
least she wasn't mad at the dog. I successfully heated
(03:11):
up the cast role. Mom had left me for dinner,
following her carefully laid out instructions, admonished the kids to
not give him people food, and was soundly ignored. I
did draw the line at a couple morsels from each
kid and put my foot down. More than that, and
he's going to get the runs, and nobody wants that.
That night, I made sure Sis got a turn by
again hogging the couch and also closing the sun's door
(03:34):
since he got a turn already. The girl was smug.
The boy made me call his mom. Mom wasn't happy
that my dog was in her kid's beds. I reminded
her that he doesn't shed, and he can't smell worse
than the kids, and her daughter might burn the house
down with us inside it if she doesn't get a turn.
Mom accepted defeat. Saturday night was again relatively peaceful, though
(03:55):
toothbrushing did happen. Early Sunday morning, I got woken up
by having my dog's step on me, which is something
he's really good at and he was mad at me
for not leaving any room.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I made room.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Apparently the girl tried to do something he didn't like
and he noped out of there. She wasn't happy about that,
but was appeased by my pain enough to go back
to bed. This morning was relatively chill, some more playing
with a dog and some teen tug of war, and
mom and dad got back around lunchtime and thanked me
for keeping their kids in one piece. The kids said
bite to the pup, and there were tears, and I
(04:28):
loaded up myself and my dog and went back home
to enjoy the relative peace and quiet.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Yeah, I wish it ended there.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
Maybe an hour after we got home, I get a
phone call from a very frazzled sounding mom with kids
crying in the background. She says, they need my dog. Now.
I'm sorry what you don't need a dog? You need
my dog like I don't need to come back and
visit soon.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
You just want him.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Well, the kids got so attached and they won't stop
crying about missing the dog, and her and her husband
don't have time for two kids and a puppy, and
more guilt inducing word vomit that was having precisely zero
effect on me. Absolutely not click still getting texts about
being reasonable, and you have.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
Time to train a new dog.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Forty eight hours of free babysitting isn't enough you want
my dog to not in this lifetime? Am I the
jerk for telling my girlfriend she can't just take back
a replacement item she gave me after the lost item
was found. My girlfriend and I had a long debate
about this quite a while ago, and it still remains
a touchy subject in our relationship. Please weigh in situation.
(05:36):
My girlfriend lost my volleyball when she borrowed it during
one of our routine league nights. She offered to replace
it at no cost to me, since she acknowledged the
ball going missing was entirely her fault. True to her word,
she gifted me a new ball before our next league night.
Note she physically gave the replacement ball to me.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
And it was now in my possession. It's now my ball.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
When we got to our league later on, perhaps later
that day or the following day, I forget which. To
be honest, my lost ball had been found by the
staff and my girlfriend handed it back to me, at
which point she also said, I'm going to take back
the other ball now and when to take it from
my bag. I told her it wasn't okay for her
to do that and challenged her on that point. Her
(06:17):
point of view, According to her, as I was no
longer missing my original ball, so it was okay for
her to take back the replacement ball. She believes that
by returning my original ball, the dead is settled, and
since the replacement was no longer necessary for me to possess,
it was hers to keep now as she had paid
for it. My point of view, once you give something
to someone, you no longer have ownership of said item,
(06:40):
as the ownership has been transferred over to the recipient. Therefore,
what happens with that item from that point on is
not for the giver to decide.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
I believe that for her.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
To reassume ownership of something she has given away to
be a huge transgression on her part. Taking back a
gift is a big no no in my eyes. My
gripe is that I feel like she should have asked
for the replacement ball back rather than have assumed ownership
of it outright if I wanted to donate the ball,
or heck, even just keep it for myself, I feel
it would have been my prerogative to do so, not hers.
(07:12):
Now to clarify one, as she had given me the
ball as a replacement and the original ball had been found,
I feel the morally correct thing for me to do
would have been to offer the replacement ball back to
her as a token of her generosity in the first place. However,
she had robbed me of this opportunity by deciding to
take back the replacement ball before I could offer it
(07:32):
back to her. Two If she had purchased it but
had not yet physically given it to me before returning
my original ball, I feel she would have been within
her rights to keep the replacement as ownership hadn't been
transferred over to me through the act of giving So
am I the jerk update. My girlfriend and I are
currently reading the comments together and we're having an absolute laugh.
(07:53):
We didn't anticipate such a high volume of responses over
one thousand. At this point, she feels validated. There were
definitely lots of points for us and me in particular,
to reflect on. I can't get back to everybody, but
I will be responding to as many as I can
in the next few days. Also, not that it matters much,
but the volleyball is worth ninety Canadian dollars to those
(08:14):
mentioning autism or mental health issues. I've already had some
concerns over being on the spectrum before. Categories and the
pedantics are things I worry and stress about very often,
much more than those around me. Thank you for pointing
that out and making room for this in the conversation.
Perhaps this is worth me looking into further. You're the jerk.
This relationship sounds exhausting. You're the jerk for making me
(08:37):
read the Tale of the Volleyball a trial in three acts,
and you're wrong. Obviously your item was lost, it was found,
You get your old item back.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Everyone's happy except you. Apparently.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
This isn't like if you ordered something on Amazon it
got lost. They sent you a replacement and your original
item came and they told you to keep both. This
is your girlfriend, though maybe not for long. I'm extremely
impressed you read that in its entirety. I only got
through the first couple of paragraphs and vaguely skin the
rest of the saga. Something something, I'm keeping all the
(09:11):
toys and you can't have any something something, Opie. I
cannot Imagine how tedious you must be in real life.
Your poor girlfriend must feel like she's presenting a defense
before the Supreme Court every time she makes the slightest error.
Your girlfriend already indemnified you by replacing your volleyball with
one of equal value. Indemnification does not equal excess. However,
(09:33):
you don't get to earn something on top of the replacement,
which you would if you kept both balls.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
You're the jerk.
Speaker 2 (09:39):
Your girlfriend made a mistake, immediately rectified the situation, and
made the very reasonable assumption she'd get to have the
excess the second ball since it was not needed by you.
Your argument isn't logically sound. You know someone's a high
level of redditor when they use.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
In words like indemnification.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Oh come on, Karen. Not everyone can be uncultured swine
like us. Am I the jerk for not allowing my
neighbor to use my driveway. I thirty four female, have
been living in my current house for about four years.
It's a lovely neighborhood and I generally have a great
relationship with my neighbors. However, there's one neighbor, Dave forty five, male,
who has been causing some issues lately, and I need
(10:18):
some perspective on whether or not I'm the jerk here.
Dave and his family moved into the house next door
about a year ago. They have a narrow driveway that
can fit only one car, and their house doesn't have
much street parking available. This hasn't been a problem until recently,
when Dave started hosting large gatherings at his house. During
these gatherings, Dave's guests would park their cars on the street,
(10:40):
which would quickly become overcrowded. As a result, some of
his guests started using my driveway without asking for permission. Initially,
I let it slide because I didn't want to cause
any conflict. However, it began happening more frequently, and on
a few occasions I'd be unable to move my own
car when I had to go to work or leave
for my own business, forcing me to go to Dave's
(11:01):
house and play a guessing game for someone to move
their car. I decided to address the issue with Dave,
explaining that I didn't mind his guests occasionally using my driveway,
but I would appreciate it if he could ask for
permission first. Dave seemed understanding and apologized for the inconvenience. However,
the situation didn't improve. Dave continued to host gatherings and
(11:22):
his guests continued to use my driveway without permission. I
decided to take matters into my own hands and placed
a no parking sign in my driveway along with a
polite note asking Dave's guests to respect my property, also
with a warning that I'd have their vehicles towed. Last weekend,
Dave hosted another party and his guests were forced to
find alternative parking due to the sign. Dave confronted me,
(11:45):
saying I was being unreasonable and that I should be
more accommodating to his guests. He argued that it was
just for a few hours and that I was creating
unnecessary tension in the neighborhood. I stood my ground, explaining
that I had tried to address the issue politely and
that my drive boy is my private property. I added
that he should have respected my request for permission and
(12:05):
made better arrangements for his guests parking. Ever since then,
me and Dave have not spoken to each other, with
him and his family most of the time shooting me
a bad luck. So am I the jerk for not
allowing my neighbor to use my driveway for his guests,
despite having tried to address the issue politely.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Your whole question.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Boils down to Am I the jerk for wanting to
be able to go to work, run errands, and leave
in case of an emergency, even if it might inconvenience
someone attending a party I wasn't invited to. No, you
are not the jerk for not wanting to be stuck
at your house when a neighbor hosts parties you weren't
invited to. Am I the jerk for refusing to get
in the car with my mom. I'm twenty eight, female,
(12:45):
thirty three weeks pregnant, high risk, and on modified bed rest.
I can still do moderate exercises and run errands, but
mostly I'm meant to be sitting with my feet up
all day so I don't get sick again. My doctor
okayed me to continue doing my mile walks. My mom
and I went to our local park that had a
walking path. She drove her car. We got about one
(13:05):
eighth mile from the car, and I mentioned thinking of
changing the name I'd picked for the baby. It's been
an issue between her and I. I had settled on
a name, but in the last couple of weeks it
began to feel like the wrong name. I've been trying
out a few names. She's frustrated by my inability to
pick one. Anyway, I mentioned this, wanting to change the name,
and she had a visceral reaction. She growled, threw her
(13:28):
hands in the air, yelled at me, and turned around
and started storming off. I didn't realize what she was doing,
so I just stood there and watched. I thought she
was going to turn and come back. Instead, she stormed
to the car, got in, and drove away. Even if
I had realized what she was doing, I couldn't have
caught up with her.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
I can only waddle these days.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
I walked back to the parking lot, thinking she was
coming back and just messing with me. But five minutes
passed and she was still gone. My leggings don't have pockets,
so I didn't have my phone with me. I went
inside the community center, and fortunately there were some ladies
setting up for something, and I asked if I could
borrow a cell phone. I figured my mom would in answer,
so I called my grandfather, who lives ten minutes from
(14:10):
the park. He said he'd be right there to get me.
About the time my granddad parked, my mom pulled back
into the lot.
Speaker 1 (14:17):
She asked me.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Why I called my grandfather instead of her, and I
told her that she left me in a park without
a cell phone, so I borrowed someone's and called the
only number I had memorized that I knew would pick
me up. Mom told my granddad she was sorry we
had bothered him and that she had taken me home.
I told her I wasn't getting in the car with her,
and she was crazy if she thought I was. She
(14:38):
asked why, and I told her, you left your eight
and a half month, high risk pregnant daughter in a
park without a cell phone on an eighty five degree
day over something as stupid as naming a baby that
isn't even due for another seven weeks. She won't even
know her own name for months. It literally doesn't even
matter yet, but you let it become a whole drama.
(14:58):
My granddad drove me home. He gave my mom a
stern talking to when we got there. Mom is now
walking around acting like she's the victim because I embarrassed her.
She said I should have just got in the car
with her. She's only offered a half attempted apology, but
it was more of a sorry you feel the way
you do apology and not a real one. She says,
I'm overreacting. I'm writing this with the intent of showing her,
(15:21):
so I'll accept whatever judgment comes my way. If I overreacted,
I want to know it. Edit she did not know
that I didn't have my phone.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Am I the jerk? Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (15:33):
If your mom flips out this much before the baby
is born, think long and hard on if you want
to deal with that and more when the baby's coming
and after it's born, and decide if you want that
in you and your baby's life. Am I the jerk
for telling my coworker to stop using my personal belongings?
So I twenty eight female, have been working at this
small software company for about three years now, and I
(15:55):
genuinely love my job. I have great coworkers and the
work environment is generally positive. However, there's this one coworker,
let's call her Sarah. She's thirty two, who has been
increasingly crossing boundaries.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
A bit of background.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Sarah joined the company around a year ago and we
were initially friendly we would have lunch together occasionally and
chat about random things. I didn't think much of it,
and it seemed like a normal office friendship. However, over
time I noticed that Sarah had started to use my
belongings without asking for permission. For example, she would take
my stapler, pens, or even my phone charger without asking.
(16:32):
At first, I brushed it off as her just being
forgetful and not realizing that these were my personal items.
I tried to be understanding and not let it bother me,
but then things started to escalate. One day, I brought
in a special lunch I had prepared as a treat
for myself. It was a dish that my grandmother used
to make for me, and it had a lot of
sentimental value. I had placed it in the fridge with
(16:53):
a note clearly stating it was mine. When lunchtime came around,
I discovered that Sarah had taken and eaten my lunch.
I confronted her, and she apologized, claiming that she thought
it was meant for the whole office to share. I
didn't buy it, but I let it go to avoid
causing the scene. Over the next few months, Sarah's behavior
continued to worsen. She began using my personal laptop without asking,
(17:16):
even though we all have our own work computers. She
would also use my coffee mug and other personal items,
despite me having my name on them. I tried to
address it politely and asked her to stop, but she
would just laugh it off and say she didn't mean
any harm. Finally I reached my breaking point last week.
I had bought a new, expensive pair of headphones to
use at work, and I had left them on my
(17:37):
desk overnight. When I arrived the next day, I found
Sarah using them at her desk. I was furious and
asked her to hand them over immediately. She tried to
play it off as a joke, but I had enough.
I told her that it was not funny and that
she needed to stop using my personal belongings without permission.
I said it was disrespectful and a violation of my privacy.
(17:58):
The rest of the office heard the emotion, and some
of my coworkers agreed with me, while others said I
was overreacting and should let it go. Sarah hasn't spoken
to me since, and the atmosphere has become tense. A
few coworkers have even suggested that I owe Sarah an
apology for embarrassing her in front of everyone. So am
I the jerk for telling my coworker to stop using
(18:18):
my personal belongings?
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
The headphones and lunch were yours and not hers. While
I would argue using a stapler isn't harmful, it just
adds to everything else. What is most irritating about her
seems to be she tries to laugh it off and
carry on like she hasn't done anything wrong. Don't apologize,
wait for her to do that, Not the jerk. Speak
to your manager and or HR. The stapler and even
(18:44):
the charger are kind of reasonable, but the lunch, your
personal laptop, and your headphones are completely out of order.
Am I the jerk for not giving up my office
to be my wife's craft room. I recently brought this
issue up with a few friends of mine, and after
disagreeing on whether I was in the wrong, suggested I
post here some backstory. I twenty five male, met my
(19:06):
wife twenty six female, six years ago during college. We
got married after dating for two years because of visa issues.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
On her side.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
Shortly after, I inherited the house we live in now
for my grandparents. Ever since then, we've lived here together.
I started a new job last year that allowed me
to work from home most days. Soon after, I turned
our main guest room.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Into my office.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
It's just slightly smaller than our master but has no
end suite. I admit I could have moved into one
of the smaller rooms, but was somewhat excited to have
my own space, complete with a three monitor desk, set up,
a comfy couch, and several shelves of figurines I've collected
and painted. As part of my job coding, I often
pace around the room for ideas, and looking at these
(19:49):
shelves that take up about half the room gives me
a lot of joy. Recently, my wife, who is a
very creative person and has dozens of crafty hobbies that
she jumps in between, outgrew her craft room that we
set up soon after moving here. It's about half the
size of our current office. We also have both a
large guest bedroom and another similar size small room that
(20:10):
we currently used mostly as storage. I recommended she used
the small room to set up a secondary desk in storage.
I figured this could be nice since she often has
several projects going on at once and would have to
store one away for the others. She, however, insists that
a bigger room would be the only real choice. Whilst
at first I tried to dissuade her from using the
(20:30):
guest room since there's no way we can cram all
the furniture in one of the small rooms, and I'm
also worried about when we have guests over and their comfort.
She seemed very happy with the decision. However, yesterday insisted
that I moved my office into one of the smaller
rooms and let her have my current room so that
our guests wouldn't have to sleep in a small space.
I disagreed vehemently, since I spent fifty hours a week
(20:53):
in my office and have spent countless hours decorating it
the exact way I wanted it. I also actually is
the extra space to be more effective and focused. Obviously,
now my wife is very angry with me and says
the only thing that will calm her down is if
I give her the bigger room. I don't think this
is something I can budge on, so read it. Am
I the jerk, not the jerk? You work fifty hours
(21:17):
a week in the room guests would sleep there infrequently,
and I don't know how many hours a week your
wife would spend on her hobby. Not the jerk, this
is your workspace for your income. She's being unreasonable. I
called the police on my neighbor after she keeped my
car because of the books that I write. I'm a
single woman in my early thirties making my living writing
(21:37):
and self publishing fiction novels. The genre I write has
a majority of the plot being steamy, so I typically
don't tell people what I write, but I do tell
them I write books for a living under a pen name,
and if you're questioning my writing abilities, I have an
editor to correct my mistakes. I'm not hiding it per se,
but I'm not telling everyone I meet what I do
for a living. And none of my neighbors knew, only
(21:59):
a bunch of friends. I live in a house alone.
Pretty much all of my neighbors are either young families
or retired couples. My next door neighbor is a young couple.
We've been polite to each other, but haven't been close
or anything lately. The husband, let's call him Roger, became
very friendly towards me, which I tried to ignore. But
he's been getting too flirty from my liking, and I
(22:20):
started to avoid him. They had a barbecue over the
bank holiday weekend and I was taking rubbish out to
put in my beIN. Roger looked at me, waved high,
and whispered something to his friend, and they both watched
me very carefully, which was incredibly creepy. On my way
through my garden, I saw Roger's wife, Dahlia, leaving the
house with her friend, and they both looked at me
(22:40):
with disgust and whispered something to each other. It was weird,
and I hurried back inside. The next morning, I found
some religious leaflets put through my letter box. They were
just printed on normal printer paper and warning about sinful
behavior and going to heck et cetera. Threw them away,
but kept finding similar leaflets put through my letter box
for the next week. Since I'm working from home, I
(23:02):
decided to see who's leaving these leaflets, and.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
To my surprise, it was Dahlia.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I decided to confront her and ask her to stop
putting religious leaflets through my door. Despite me being polite,
she was not happy. She told me that I should
rethink my life because what I write is disgusting. It's
pretty vanilla, and she found her husband secretly reading it
at night. She kept going on and on, how I'm
going to heck, how I have no morals, et cetera. Well,
(23:27):
I told her to stay away from me and discuss
this with her husband, and I closed the door in
her face. Don't know who, but someone told them what
I do for a living. A day later, I found
an insult painted on my door. A few days later
I caught her key in my car. She was almost
done with another insult. Well, I called the police honor,
and since I installed cameras after this incident, she's been
(23:49):
taken to court over keen my car. I talked to
my other neighbor, she asked about the police about it,
and she told me that I went overboard, that Dahlia
was clearly insecure. But she's a lovely woman and a
great mother, and I should have talked to her instead
of calling the police and given her a chance to
change her behavior. Am I the jerk for calling the
police and not giving Dahlia a chance? If she's key
(24:11):
in your car and painting rude names on your door,
she is not a lovely woman just because she doesn't
like what you write, doesn't give her the right to
destroy your property. It appears that the behavior was escalating,
so getting the police involved was necessary.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Not the jerk?
Speaker 2 (24:25):
Am I the jerk for saying I'm not going to
take care of my pregnant girlfriend's baby when he's born.
I met my girlfriend several months ago. On our like
fourth date, she told me that she was pregnant from
her ex. I've been told by friends and family that
I should have left at that point, but I was
really dumb and really desperate at that time because it
was my first relationship, so I wasn't really thinking and
(24:45):
I went along with a relationship with her.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
I loved her.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
She was like a perfect match for me and other stuff. However,
it wasn't until this month that things started to be
a big problem. My girlfriend started talking to me about
paying for some baby stuff and what are ex spectation
was for me once the baby was born. We originally
had an agreement that it was only going to be
her and her ex. He's still around, He's not a
deadbeat that would be taking care of the baby. However,
(25:10):
she told me recently that her ex was out of
a job and doesn't even have a car and is
tight on money, so she expects me to help pay
for the stuff that she needs like diapers, baby clothes,
and whatever.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
I said. Forget that I did not agree to that.
Speaker 2 (25:25):
I might change a diaper a couple of times or
feed him once or twice, but I'm not going to
be fully taking care of him what on earth, especially
not spending money on baby stuff like I barely have
money myself. I'm nineteen years old. By the way, she
got mad because I said I wasn't going to help
her buy baby things and help her take care of
the baby after he's born. This was a big argument
(25:45):
that lasted for a long time. Am I the jerk here?
I'm going to probably go against the grain here, but
I'm going with not the jerk. As a single mom,
I don't expect anyone to step up and care for
my kid. That's mine and her father's job. I will
come positive male role models in her life, and if
they want to do extra for her, then I'm extremely
grateful for those actions, but I absolutely do not expect
(26:07):
them to fund any part of her life or take
on a parent role.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yep, not the jerk. Oh PI.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
She may have really liked you, but she was also
looking for someone to take her dead beat X's place,
and yes, he is a dead beat, no matter what
he says he's going to do. When the baby is born,
your girlfriend will stop being available to you and will
be full time taking care of a newborn baby. If
you stick around, you will be pulled into sharing responsibility,
and as soon as you've established a pattern of taking
(26:34):
responsibility for the kid, you can in some states in
the US not sure where you are, be made legally
responsible for child support. Even if you leave, you're going
to essentially lose your girlfriend to her baby, and you're
going to risk being sucked into child support for life.
If you stick around, do both of you a favor
and get.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Out of her life. You're the jerk.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Look if you ain't mad enough to be a father
to that baby, then quit wasting this girl's time. You
make it very clear that you you only want her
for one reason, and that reason is not to help
her with anything important in her life. I've dealt with
plenty of guys like you until I finally found the
right one who didn't mind that I have four kids
with different dads. My new man provides for all of
(27:13):
us because he is a real man who makes real money.
He also agreed to not marry me on paper so
that I can stay getting my benefits for me and
my kids. He even doesn't mind me getting with some
of my exes now and then because he is secure
in our relationship. I know he ain't happy about it,
but he knows it's important to me, so he doesn't
try to stop me. He respects my strong independence and
(27:35):
never tries to man explain anything to me. Let this
girl go so she can find out real man, cause boy,
you ain't cutting it. Won't replace a brand new broken lawnmower,
but will let me return and reorder.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (27:48):
So I bought a riding lawnmower a few years ago
from a big home store. I paid for delivery, and
upon said delivery, it didn't start. The delivery truck had
left by the time I had gotten gas in it
and figured this out, so I called the store. I
explained that my brand new, just delivered today lawnmower was
not starting, and immediately the person on the phone asked
me if I purchased the extended warranty. I hadn't, so
(28:10):
they told me that it would cost one hundred dollars
to have them come get the lawnmower and then, however
much more the repairs were. Mind you, it was brand new.
In my mind, they should bring me a new one
to replace the one that didn't work upon delivery. No
matter how much I argued, this worker was sticking to
their story. I quickly changed my tactic and asked what
the return policy was. As long as a return was
(28:31):
initiated within thirty days, I could have a full refund,
including the cost of delivery, and the store would come
pick up the lawnmower for me at no additional cost.
So I pointed out that the store wouldn't replace my
non working item by taking one trip to my house
to pick up the non working one and bring me
one that worked, and instead would make two trips to
pick up the one that didn't work and then bring
(28:51):
me the new one I purchased the second time as
a totally different transaction. The worker said yes, and when
I tried to point out how that made no sense,
he didn't want to hear. So right then and there,
I initiated a refund. I then immediately ordered a new
one and had him set up the delivery date after
that date was set, we had to schedule the date
for pickup of the old mower, and I made myself
unavailable for any date other than the delivery date for
(29:14):
the new one. So, even though he had insisted they
wouldn't just bring me a replacement mower and pick up
the first one, they were now doing just that, but
with the additional paperwork of processing return and additional paperwork
for delivery of the new more The manager called me
later that day to apologize for the hassle, and they
ended up waiving my delivery fee. I worked at a
(29:34):
lows in customer service. It's atrocious, but I can confirm
that this type of crap is common. Most systems aren't
set up to process what you need done. We literally
had to return and then sell a new one to
set up delivery. Quite often we had set up in
exchange with a delivery and then just swap out the items.
Odds are that person was never trained for an exchange sale.
Ninety percent of the store I worked at wasn't trained
(29:56):
on doing one. Heck, a good ninety percent weren't trained
to do a return at all. Am I the jerk
for deciding to separate our finances just because my wife
refused to buy a pair of ear rings for my daughter.
My wife and I have one daughter from a previous marriage.
Each Mine is called pen she's fifteen, and hers is Amy,
she's seventeen. We've been married for ten years now. Our
(30:17):
finances are joint because we don't care for money. She
makes seventy to eighty thousand and I make one hundred
eighty K to two hundred K per year. She's in
charge of our finances. My wife has the weird fixation
on having the kids earn their stuff, and while I
agree both of our daughters are well behaved, good students,
and kind, I don't see why they have to earn
every single thing daily. For example, if my daughter is
(30:40):
working in the kitchen at night and goes to sleep
without putting her laptop away because she'll work again in
the morning, then my wife decides that she can't eat anything.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Sweet that day.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
I've voiced with better words that I find it stupid.
Same goes for her daughter. She's prone to forget things easily,
and if she doesn't remember to put this or that
thing away, my wife removes her phone or tees tablet.
Yesterday was my day off and I stayed back home
resting while my wife and our kids went out to
buy my mother in law mother's Day gift. Around five pm,
my daughter came to my room and said that my
(31:11):
wife bought Amy a necklace and when she asked for
a pair of ear rings she loved. My wife refused
because the night before she stayed up until late watching
Netflix when she knows she's not supposed to. This isn't
the first time my wife refuses to buy my daughter things,
and honestly, it boils my blood. My daughter is a
really good kid. I work hard to make sure my
family has every or most of the things they want,
(31:33):
just for my wife to tell them no because they
are kids being kids. When my wife came into our room,
I was honest. I said that her rule was utterly
stupid and I was done putting up with that. That
I don't particularly like her buying one thing for her
daughter while the other had nothing, and that until she
accepts to attend therapy with me and fix the problem,
our money will be taken care of separately, and the
(31:54):
joint account will be for the house and emergency matters only.
This means she now has to pay half of the
utilities and some other things. She didn't like it because
her money will be cut short and implied I was
financially mistreating her by doing this over a pair of
ear rings. She went to her parents, and my father
in law called me soon after. He said I was
a jerk and that it was my obligation to provide
(32:14):
for my family.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
ETA.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
I might not have explained myself. I'm still paying most
of our joint expenses, like sixty to seventy percent. But
before this, my wife kept almost all her money to
herself and only put toward the emergency fund we set. Still,
I put a bigger amount. She's not happy about us
separating our finances because this means she has to contribute
to the house now and she'll have less money for
(32:36):
her daughter's college fund and her fun ETA two. Thanks
for all your replies and comments. I'll try to read
all of them and we'll be answering some. I also
want to thank you for all of your advice. My
wife still refuses to do therapy, and as some of
you said, this will be my hill to die on.
If she doesn't agree by next Wednesday, I'm sure we
will divorce. Someone also asked for our ages. I'm thirty
(32:58):
six mail and she's forty five female.
Speaker 1 (33:01):
Listen.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
This is extremely important. When you subscribe to a channel,
it tells YouTube that they're doing a good job and
it shares their content.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
With more people.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
So for that reason, if you are not subscribed to
our channel, please do it right now. Please please and
watch this video next, the one that popped up on
the screen.
Speaker 1 (33:20):
You're you're gonna love that one.
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