September 29, 2025 • 32 mins
In today’s episode of Reddit Stories Podcast, a wild Karen completely loses it. You won’t believe how this one ends! Sit back, relax, and enjoy this binge-worthy Reddit Stories Podcast, featuring Karen freakouts, entitled people stories, and pro revenge tales.
🎧 Listen to More Reddit Stories Podcast Episodes Here:
👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5ZVzMm0Pr3bwlM26VuVv8J
👉 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mr-redder/id1516821033
📌 **Every episode dives into trending Reddit stories, insane Karen freakouts, and dramatic pro revenge stories! We cover the wildest situations from r/EntitledPeople, r/AITA, and r/EntitledParents. If you love binge-worthy podcast compilations, long-form storytelling, and Reddit drama stories, you’re in the right place!
👉 📺 Love These Stories? Watch Full Video Episodes on YouTube! → https://www.youtube.com/@MrRedderYT
🎵 Music Credit: https://soundcloud.com/lakeyinspired
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories-podcast-mr-redder--5571651/support.
Enjoyed this story? Follow the show and leave a quick rating.
🎧 Listen to More Reddit Stories Podcast Episodes Here:
👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5ZVzMm0Pr3bwlM26VuVv8J
👉 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mr-redder/id1516821033
📌 **Every episode dives into trending Reddit stories, insane Karen freakouts, and dramatic pro revenge stories! We cover the wildest situations from r/EntitledPeople, r/AITA, and r/EntitledParents. If you love binge-worthy podcast compilations, long-form storytelling, and Reddit drama stories, you’re in the right place!
👉 📺 Love These Stories? Watch Full Video Episodes on YouTube! → https://www.youtube.com/@MrRedderYT
🎵 Music Credit: https://soundcloud.com/lakeyinspired
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories-podcast-mr-redder--5571651/support.
Enjoyed this story? Follow the show and leave a quick rating.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey there, mister Redder here, welcome back to another episode
of Redded Podcast Stories. Our first story we'll be reading today,
my parents, brother and sister in law showed up to
Christmas at my house when they knew they weren't welcome.
After that, am I the jerk for dropping out as
my brother's best man a couple of days before his wedding?
Speaker 2 (00:18):
And after that?
Speaker 1 (00:19):
No, you tell me right now exactly what's taking so long?
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Your wish is my command. Now.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
For every thumbs up this video gets one, Karen does
not get to crash anyone's Christmas party, bomb bug, So
please smash that like button and subscribe and turn on
notifications for news stories from Reddit. Every single day, my parents,
brother and sister in law showed up to Christmas at
my house when they knew they weren't welcome. I was
(00:46):
trying to keep things to two posts, but I realized
while compiling everything that Part two is just too long,
so I've divided it into a part three for those
who commented in mass. For me to get cameras, I
will when I can afford it. I'm still in fine
ancial recovery from buying a house last year, and as
far as I know good cameras need a decent computer
to record to, and I don't have anything more than
(01:07):
a three year old laptop that runs Windows ten. Yes,
I'm aware of doorbell cameras. That will be the first
kind I get. For those who kept saying that I
should have just gotten my brother and sister in law arrested,
the only reason I didn't was because they are parents,
their kids need them, and if Dan was arrested, he'd
likely lose his job, and without that, his family has
no money, and sister in law has a three month
(01:29):
old baby right now.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Neither of them need to end up in jail. But
you don't need jail for revenge.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Police can help, yes, but I got payback without filing
a police report. Would I be this merciful again? More
than likely not, and they know it. I decided to
wait on making an account and posting until after the
new year, just in case more stuff happened, and it did.
As previous readers know, my sister in law was making passive,
aggressive posts on social media that were obviously directed at me,
(01:57):
especially after sister in law had her fourth baby, and no,
she was posting the same repetitive nonsense over and over again.
She just found semi clever ways of rewording it, but
she pretty much just kept regurgitating that she was tired
of living with my parents, that there isn't enough space,
she needs her own house, blah blah blah. I know
I sound dismissive, but live through what I have with
(02:18):
these people, and you'd be ready to sarcastically play tiny
violins in front of them too.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
They're just that bad.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
And since I waited until January to make an account,
more happened just like I thought. I stated before that
I'd invited half the family for a Christmas Eve party
at my house, and everyone I invited all came, even
though it was a fairly long drive of around three
to four hours for them, but they wanted to come
and show me their support. I was praised by them
a lot for how hard I'd worked to get a
(02:46):
house of my own, and that they were sorry for
everything I'd went through. I was asked why I didn't
just take my camper and drive the three hours back
to them instead of living pretty much homeless for so long,
and I had to sheepishly admit that I was very
attached to living around here and I had my best
employment opportunities in this area. My hometown doesn't have a
lot of great job opportunities in my field, if any
(03:07):
at all, and I wanted to make my own way
as much as I could, an answer that they overall accepted.
We moved on to having a rather nice party, the
best I had been in in years. Some relatives even
brought CDs of great Christmas albums, and I have to
say the one my uncle brought of Ray Charles was
my favorite. He sings Christmas songs like no one else
(03:27):
I've heard. It was a grand and happy time. I
felt like, for once I could just forget my past
issues and enjoy the moment. But I wouldn't be riding
this if it had stayed that way. About two hours
into the party, you know who showed up. My parents,
brother and sister in law popped in trying to look
all smiles. They didn't even knock, just walked right in
(03:48):
through my front door like they were meant to be there.
I shut off the music and told them that they
needed to leave immediately. They begged to stay and said
that they had brought gifts. One of my uncles stood
up and yelled at them before I got another chance
to speak, and he said that they don't deserve to
be in my home or my life after the crap
they tried to pull months earlier, and he was backed
(04:08):
up by several other relatives. Mind you, this guy is
my mother's brother and he used to love her to
pieces until he found out about the crap that went
on between me and my parents. My grandparents mother's parents,
as old as they are, hurriedly got in between us
and said to my parents that if they want to
make amends with me, it's far too soon, and they've
never been more disappointed in them than they were this
(04:30):
past year. They'd hidden their favoritism from my brother from
prying eyes for a long time, but no one was
fooled anymore, and they needed to make a serious effort
to try and actually treat me like a son if
they ever wanted to be in my life again. Then
they turned to Dan and sister in law and said
they've seen the repetitive nonsense sister in law keeps posting about.
They're tired of it, and they just let it go. Already,
(04:52):
my house will not become their new home. Sister in
law went back to her old standard of crying and
had a pity party about how she should be the
one living in this house and not me. She plopped
down in a chair to have a tantrum and say
it wasn't fair I got this house to myself when
I have no family of my own, and she has
four kids that need more space, and she just wanted
(05:12):
a better place to live in and feel like a
real mom.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
It was petty of me.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
But I loudly pointed out that she sucks as a
mother because she lets my mother do most of the
parenting while she sits on her butt all day drinking,
playing on her phone, or going out and spending all
of Dan's money, and she has the nerve to complain
about it. I even joked that I'm surprised her baby
doesn't get drunk from drinking her milk since she drinks
so much booze, which I admit went a bit too
(05:38):
far because I got some stairs and sister in law
demanded to know if I was calling her a bad mom.
I said the evidence speaks for itself, and if she
wanted to be able to afford to move out of
my parent's house someday, then she needs to put her
college degree to some use, get a job and learn
to save money. My mother already does most of the
childcare for my brother's kids anyway, so she'd have plenty
(05:59):
of time after her baby gets a little older. My
brother's eldest kid, who seven, ran up and started kicking
and screaming at me for yelling at his mom, and
he kept going off on me about how his mom
said that I was the bad guy who made her
cry and didn't let them live here. That's when my
brother grabbed his son to pull him away, but all
the other relatives jumped back in and this sort of
(06:20):
turned into a family intervention against my sister in law
and brother. She was crying, her new baby was crying,
her kids were crying. Heck, even Dan was very nearly
in tears from the verbal lashing he was being assaulted with.
He ended up just sitting on the autumn and I
keep shoes in by the front door and looking like
a complete wreck. He couldn't look anyone in the eye.
(06:40):
He couldn't even say two words to me, not with
a whole house filled with angry people ready to judge
him if he tried to let out his inner golden
child again. If they weren't there to get in his way.
I'd bet this would have ended up a repeat of
when he tried to order me around and tried to
take my house months earlier. By this point, though, he
had been so thoroughly humiliated that his and my parents'
(07:01):
reputation in the family was completely destroyed. Because the masks
were all off now. Soon after my parents, brother and
sister in law all left in defeat, the party resumed
and we all avoided speaking of what just happened for
the rest of the evening. Since most of the adults
had been drinking. Everyone stayed the night in my house.
I even let some of them sleep in the camper
(07:22):
so there'd be enough space. I admit it also makes
a good guest house. My relatives all wanted a tour
of it earlier as well, and they said they couldn't
believe I'd been living in it for around two years.
I got a lot of questions about it, like what
summer and winter was like and so on. I was
up earlier than anyone else Christmas morning and had a
fresh pot of coffee and some iberprofen for those spiked
(07:43):
eggnog hangovers a few of them had. I was complimented
on being a way nicer host than my parents ever were,
and we all agreed to do this again next Christmas.
After Christmas, sister in law did finally stop making posts
that were obviously digs at me, and deleted all of
the old ones as well. Shortly after the new year,
she more recently made a new post complaining about how
(08:04):
she had tried to convince my parents to get her
a camper like I did, so he could be set
up in the backyard so Dan and his family could
use the whole house as their family home. Well, a
taste of one's own medicine is never fun, because my
parents turn that idea down vehemently. I hear no one
is going to push them out of their own home,
let alone their master bedroom. The post was only up
(08:25):
for a couple of days before sister in law removed it,
and she has hardly posted anything since then. She loves
to complain, but if a tree falls and no one
is around to hear it, can it still complain? Sister
in law, I guess, has realized there's no point in
doing it when no one hears her anymore, and Dan
can't afford to move his family out on his salary
alone anytime soon. If they end up expecting another kid
(08:47):
in the next few years, I won't be surprised. Things
mellowed down for me since then, and I've even invited
friends over for a poker night. I suck at poker
because I can never remember a darn thing about it,
but so what. We get to drink beer and eat
other young food while being merry idiots. We all loaded
up on whoppers from Burger King and just had at
it the best way for grown men can when they
(09:08):
just want to have a good, unadulterated time and get drunk.
I think maybe around summer I'll look into possibly dating someone.
I'm not exactly getting younger here, fingers crossed. That goes well.
My camper just sits idle in my yard now, and
I admit there were some times I went out there
just to spend time in it.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
I did live in it for two years.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
It's like my second home, and maybe one day I'll
actually get to use it for camping like it was
meant to be. I've never been camping. My parents considered
it a waste of time, so it'd be completely a
new experience for me. This pretty much marks the end
of what happened, my parents, brother and sister in law
have all been staying very clear of me.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
In fact, they seem to.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Have gone back to acting like I don't exist, like
they did before I bought a house. Not like that
bothers me at all. It's better that way. But they'll
inevitably come back in some way. I know they will.
I just wonder what kind of stupid thing they'll do next.
If anything notable like all of this ever happens again,
I'll make another post if this account is still active.
I hope o Pe can have a movie made about
(10:07):
his life. Can you imagine how good it would be?
Am I the jerk for dropping out? Is my brother's
best man a couple of days before his wedding. I'm
thirty six and my brother, who's thirty got married this
past weekend.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I was supposed to be as best man.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
The wedding was twelve enough because they didn't want to
have to deal with toddlers and such, which is fair enough.
A lot of guests do have younger kids, though, so
they decided to have a venue nearby with a professional
sitter if parents wanted to drop their kids off there.
My wife has some injuries that make her slow to
respond and understand what others are saying, and she needs
help sometimes with her food. I'll cut it up into
(10:42):
small pieces. This doesn't mean she's nothing, and she's a smart,
capable woman. They had the rehearsal dinner. At the end,
my sister in law pulled me aside, saying she had
to discuss something with me. She said, they told us
about the additional venue they'll be having for their wedding.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I said yes.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Then she asked if my wife had any particular food
preferences and they would order extra food for her there.
I was extremely confused and told her we already gave
our meal choices, but she said my wife would be
better suited at this second venue. I remember just sort
of staring at her for a bit and asking if
she was serious that she expected my wife to be
with the babysitter. Sister in law said, it's not like that,
(11:21):
and they're just looking out for my wife and I
don't have to feed her or anything and can have
fun at the wedding. My brother came over and I
told him I've literally never heard such crap that they
think my wife is a kid to be left with
a sitter. Brother said it's for the best and if
I want, I can always go over and check on her.
I told him, if this is the way they're treating
(11:42):
my wife, I have no desire to be a part
of their crap show and dropped out as best man. Well,
all heck broke loose, and some people agreed that I
was right, but my parents texted called everything saying that
they don't agree with this either, but it's their choice
and to get over my ego and still calm. I
didn't end up going. I did hear that they got
(12:03):
one of the groomsmen to give a speech, and overall
it was fine, but my brother sent me a text
saying he expected better from me. I replied back saying
I expected better from him. My sister in law sent
a long text that I ruined their big day on
purpose and made them look bad.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Not the jerk. Sister in law ruined the day herself.
Nothing to do with you.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Also, can't believe your parents' reaction either, op I mean,
my parents didn't agree with this, but they said to
put it aside for one day and the wedding wasn't
the place to make a stand. Then yell at them
later if I wanted to. A couple of others also
said this, which is why I'm doubting if I went
too far for not just attending and then telling them later.
The last thing I wanted to do was miss my
(12:45):
own brother's wedding. But I just feel like they're the
ones that put me in this position. My wife always
comes first. No, you tell me right now exactly what's
taking so long?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Your wish is my command?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
More drive through Mayhem in suit whose last night at
your local Mendy's. We've had a lot of terrible and
weird things happen lately, and as our sister store we
call Mendy's Ray Road is perpetually closed, we get our
usual rush of customers combined with all of the mobile
and uber eats and door dash and food slaps and
you name it, spilling over to our location. It's hectic.
(13:19):
We're running out of things. It's literal mayhem. I take
order number five to one. As I begin to assemble
their drinks as is the process, I noticed that the
four drinks they ordered suddenly can't be made due to
the flavor being out. I need to change out the
syrup to the freestyle machine. Just as I realize the
machine's running out, I hear the bloop that alerts me
(13:40):
to the entry of a new customer in the drive through.
I'm about to greet them, which I always managed to
do within two seconds of approaching the speaker box, but
these people were yelling right as they pulled up, saying.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
Yeah, hello, Hello.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I lay a little louder into my already interrupted greeting, saying, Hi,
welcome to Mendy's.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Please hold for a minute while I, Oh, my god,
you talked to the last guy.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
The customer chimes in. More attitude was in this than
I can accurately depict. I usually say that I'll be
with them in a second, but this time I was
about to say that they'd need to hold on for
a couple of minutes due to my situation. They interrupted,
so I just took care of the things that I
needed to. I managed to get the keys from my
manager to open the closet to get the drink mix
and pour the four drinks, and then set the next order.
(14:27):
While I was running all over the place, I heard
increasingly angrier grumbles along the way, so I did my
due diligence and said just another minute or two every
so often.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
I thought this helped. Evidently it didn't.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
As soon as I'm back to my ordering machine and
re greet the customers with a thanks for waiting. How
can I help you, I hear the following ear piercing rand.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
What in the world took you so long?
Speaker 1 (14:50):
I reply, as kindly as possible, despite having someone threaten
me earlier this week. Ma'am, I'm sorry about that, but
I can take your order now.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
She went full local.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Again, saying no, no, no, you tell me right now
exactly what's taking so long?
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Inter malicious compliance.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
What could have been an easy thirty seconds of ordering
and then beginning to make her family's food turned into
a debacle now thanks to malicious compliance. I'll tell you
exactly what's taking so long? Okay, Well I didn't start
off and drive through. Actually I was on the grill first.
I really liked the grill. I missed the freedom more
than anything, you know what I mean? This was a
rhetorical question, but I know that the machine that connects
(15:32):
them to my headset was still on and unable to
not be because the line was so backed up. So anyway,
where was I? Oh? Yeah, Well, the customer three cars
before you ordered a sprite. Well, actually a cier missed
but settled for sprite because coke products. You know that
sprite was the last sprite and I knew it, so
I tried to get a hold of my manager. I
(15:52):
went on telling them the story forever. During this whole thing,
I could hear an occasional beginning of a sentence or two.
But look who all all of a sudden didn't yell
her scream anymore. Her frustration was at a boil, though
I just didn't realize it yet. Somebody did boil over
besides her. The car behind this group. They were honking
the whole while. It was like a symphony of people
(16:13):
telling their life stories overlapping one another. Samantha, my coworker,
even chimed in and backed up how busy and crazy
it was this week. I then finished with a I
guess that leads us up to write this moment. Would
you like to order?
Speaker 2 (16:26):
They replied with an exasperated well, I didn't mean your
whole life story.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Ask and he shall receive as petty and snide as
this may seem, it was just what I needed to
get stuff off my chest and let me prepare for
the next group of customers who lie and wait to
mistreat me another day. Am I the jerk for making
homemade food for everyone except my brother's stepdaughter I twenty
seven female. I'm not a professional chef, but I have
(16:53):
taken a bunch of cooking glasses and love making elaborate
meals for friends and family. About two years ago, my
brother Greg, twenty five male, married Cheryl thirty four female.
Cheryl has a daughter from a previous relationship, Becca, who's nine,
who has several health conditions, including celiac and a severe
dairy allergy that requires her to carry an EpiPen. Last weekend,
(17:14):
I hosted a dinner at my house for my parents'
wedding anniversary. I made a fancy five course dinner, and
in addition to my parents, I invited four close family friends, Greg, Cheryl,
and Becca, and my sister, her boyfriend and their twins,
who are both eight. Because of Becca's food restrictions, I
found a restaurant in town that specializes in gluten free,
dairy free, as well as other allergen free food and
(17:36):
arranged for them to make a full meal for Becca
that I could pick up in advance.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
For the party.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
I've made a variety of specialty meals in the past,
for example, keto meals when my friend was following that diet,
and I like the challenge, but knowing how serious Becca's
restrictions were, I didn't trust myself to make her meal.
I have ADHD and get easily distracted, and even if
I used the wrong spoon or didn't completely wash some
flowers off of a bowl, it could make her incredibly sick.
(18:03):
I thought the takeout solution was fine, but when I
served the food, I saw Cheryl looking at Becca's plate
with a stony face. For her part, Becha started eating
and seemed fine. Cheryl whispered to Greg, and Greg asked
if he could talk to me in the kitchen when
we got there.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
He said that it was unbelievable that.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I couldn't be bothered to make something for Becca, that
they had been bragging about what a great cook I
am to her, and that he knew I'd make keto,
vegan and other complicated kinds of foods in the past.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
Now she would feel.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Left out because she didn't get to eat what the
rest of the family was eating. He said that it
was obvious that I didn't care about making his stepdaughter
feel like a part of the family, and that they
were leaving Greg. Cheryl, and Becca then left, which put
a damper on the rest of the party. I felt
like I did my best at the time, but in hindsight,
I wonder if I should have tried harder to make
Becca feel included since she is a relatively new addition
(18:54):
to our family. Am I the jerk for some reason?
I read that and I felt sad for you. I'm
honestly in disbelief you thought you did something wrong. You
were incredibly thoughtful in how you handled and sharing she
had a meal.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Suitable for her.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
You have ADHD and are well aware that mistakes are
so easily made, so to ensure you didn't seriously put
her health in danger, you decided the safest option was
to contact a restaurant to provide something. I can't stress
this enough.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
You are not the jerk. Same here.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
If someone had gone to the trouble of making sure
my kid didn't have a reaction to dinner, I would
have been grateful, not upset. I don't have ADHD, but
if I didn't cook for someone with allergies on a
regular basis, I definitely would forget something. You are most
definitely not the jerk, and it's sad they couldn't appreciate
your effort.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Not the jerk.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
If you accidentally made a Keto meal wrong, it would
upset their diet. It sounds like if you made Becca's
meal incorrectly, it could have major medical consequences. You're not
wrong for not wanting that stress on you. Did your
brother understand the reason why you ordered her a special
meal that you were concerned about doing something that might
make her sick. My sister in law has food restrictions,
(20:02):
and I've never heard her say anything but appreciation when
others have done something similar for her. He was very
angry when we talked, so I couldn't get a word
in edgewise. I spoke to Cheryl about this issue when
she asked if I could make an allerge and free
cake for Becca's birthday last year. I told her about
my anxiety over possibly making her sick and offered to
make flower decorations if she could find a suitable cake,
(20:24):
which she did. I mistakingly assumed, based on this conversation
that she understood my hesitation to cook for Becca. Am
I the jerk for being disrespectful to my boyfriend's sister.
I'm twenty four female. My boyfriend Zach twenty four male.
His mother passed when he was only eleven. His father
worked a lot, so Zach's older sister at least who's
(20:46):
now thirty, basically became the woman of the house for
a lack of a better term. She cooked all the meals,
cleaned the house, drove Zack to school and other activities,
et cetera. She was extremely parentified, and I do feel
for her on that front. She went to a local college.
Because of all this, Zach and Elise are very close.
He has a lot of respect for her. Zach and
(21:07):
I have dated for nearly a year. We are very
different in terms of backgrounds. He's much more reserved than
I am. Before me, he spent a lot of his.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Weekends gaming or just hanging out with a small group
of friends. I tend to go out. I work hard
all week and want to enjoy the time I have off.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Zack is a shy, somewhat nerdy guy, and I do
think I've broken him out of his shell a little,
pushing him to do things out of his comfort zone.
Elise and their father have made several comments about him changing.
She's very nice and cordial when we see each other,
but she's made several comments about Zach not needing to
change who he is. Sunday, Zack invited myself, some of
(21:43):
his friends, his dad, sister, brother in law, and niece
over to watch the game. At one point, vacations got
brought up. I mentioned I was trying to convince him
to go on a two day local cruise with me,
as he's never been on one. Zach reminded me he's
not the biggest fan of boats. I pointed out he's
never been on one, and we could rent one to
take out so he could get used to it. He
(22:04):
was somewhat on the fence. Myself and one of his
buddies were trying to help him see it's not that
bad at least. Butted in and said, if he doesn't
want to go, then I'm sure you can find someone
else to go. I said, I was pretty sure I
could talk him into it. She asked why I would
want him to go if he really didn't want to.
I said, of course, I would never try to force
him to go, but it's just something to think about.
(22:26):
She repeated that he doesn't like boats and that I
should respect that. I rolled my eyes, not really understanding
why she was so adamant on this, and said she
needed to relax. She's not his mother, she shouldn't care
this much about the situation. At least was clearly upset
by the comment, but didn't say anything else. The subject
got changed and I thought all was well. A little later,
(22:46):
Zack asked for my help getting something out of his room.
Once in there, he told me I was out of
line for how I spoke to his sister. I said
she was the one that was getting up in our business.
Zach said that I kept pushing it and got upset
when I said, well, clearly she and your dad didn't
push you enough to try new things. He said I
was being disrespectful and needed to apologize to Alice. I
(23:08):
laughed and said, no, she needs to butt out. Zach
finally asked me to leave. I did, aggravated. I really
thought my friends would be on my side, but they
said I crossed a line. Am I the jerk? You're
the jerk you're saying? I managed to break him out
of his shell says a lot here. It seems like
you're constantly pushing him to do things he wouldn't necessarily
(23:29):
do otherwise, and I think this is not healthy. What's
wrong with being shy and not wanting to do some things?
Your way isn't the only correct way. And you did
push him on this occasion too, and you were being
disrespectful to his sister. I get that you want to
get him out of his comfort zone, but ganging up
on him with his friend trying to get him to
do something he doesn't want to is called bullying. It's
(23:50):
you deciding you know what he'll like better than he
does and ignoring what he has to say. He's the
one who should have spoken of but likely didn't want
to embarrass you by telling you to shut up, and
his sister stepped in to stop a bully.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
So yeah, you're the jerk. You're the jerk.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Your boyfriend does not like boats. If it's clear that
someone doesn't want to do a particular vacation plan, you
attempting to pressure him into it makes it extremely clear
that this is a vacation for you, not the both
of you. Find something you can both enjoy which may
or may not require you both stepping out of your
comfort zone. But to a lesser degree than something one
person has expressed a strong dislike of doing. Remember that
(24:28):
not only is his sister not his mother, but she's
extremely close to it.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
You are also not his mother.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Am I the jerk for telling my brother in law
to get over himself and to quit holding a ten
year grudge? My brother in law, married to my sister,
is a general contractor. About ten years ago, my dad
and brother were building a deck at my parents' home.
They asked my brother in law if they could borrow
his skidloader. When he said no, they prepared the ground
as best they could without the skidloader, but got to
(24:56):
the point where they couldn't go on without it. They
went to my sister's house to ask again, but found
out brother in law was out of town. They talked
my sister into letting them borrow it, so she took
them down to his construction lot and they hooked it
up to my dad's truck. This next part I'm not
sure of since I don't know much about towing, but
from what I was told, Dad's truck wasn't big enough
(25:17):
or powerful enough to tow the skidloader on the dump trailer,
so he lost control. And ranked the truck, trailer and
skidloader were totaled. The insurance was barely enough to cover
the medical costs in the truck. There was none left
over to cover brother in law stuff. When he got
back to town, he exploded, He threatened to sue, and
things just went downhill from there. My parents are not
(25:39):
rich and he wouldn't have gotten anything, so in the end,
sister talked him into letting it go. However, from that
day on he would have nothing to do with our family.
He doesn't come for birthdays, holidays, nothing at all. Next
month is our parents' fiftieth anniversary and we're planning a
big family gathering to celebrate. We're also chipping in to
send our parents on a cruise to Mexico because they've
(26:00):
never been out of the country. I spoke to sister
about it the other day and she said she's coming
with the kids, but brother in law is not coming.
I was fine with that, but when we were discussing
their portion of the cruise money, I heard him yelling
in the background to deduct their portion from the cost
of the skidloader and dump trailer.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
That really upset me.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
So after my call with my sis, I called my
brother in law and told him to get over himself.
I told him Dad and Bro made a mistake, but
that was ten years ago and he needs to let
it go. He said he'll let it go when they
give him the money that he lost. I told him
he's a jerk for holding onto a grudge and putting
money in the way of a family relationship. Sister called
(26:39):
me a few minutes ago and said they're not coming
and that I was out of line. We argued for
a bit and that's where it stands. I don't think
I'm wrong for telling him to let go of the past,
but they're not coming to the anniversary party, So now
I'm not sure you're the jerk. Your family stole fifty
thousand dollars in work equipment from your brother in law.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
They didn't pay him back.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
By the sounds of it, they showed zero remorse and
he should just get over it. You and your family
sound massively entitled. Your brother in law is smart to
cut the lot of you off clean. You're the jerk,
so are your parents. They shouldn't have stolen his property,
and yes it was theft. They should have made him
whole before replacing their own property. They should have apologized.
(27:22):
They should have given him the money back at some
point over the last ten years, would have considered everyone
sucks here if your parents had made any effort to
take responsibility. What's missing from your story is where your
father and brother took accountability for their actions which caused
real damages for another person, and worked sincerely to make
up for it. If the insure incident cover everyone's damages,
(27:43):
then after necessary medical costs, the skidloaders should have been
fixed because your brother in law was the innocent party. Instead,
your dad put that money towards his own truck. Your
brother in law was extremely kind not to sue. It's
been ten years, so how much of the damages have
your father and brother paid back? If the answer isn't
all of it, then not only are they complete and
(28:03):
utter great a jerks, but so are you. You're the
jerk in this latest chapter of the story for blaming
the victim for not just rolling over and accepting his
awful in law's actual criminal behavior. Good for your sister
for standing by the right person. In this chapter, Karen
keeps asking why are you still single? My response shuts
her up quick I thirty six year old single female
(28:27):
get asked this question a lot, and since it comes
from coworkers, extended family, friends of friends, then responding rudely
by saying, none of your darn business, sweetie, still doesn't
seem to work, not anymore. I try to keep good
relationships with those around me for a number of reasons,
but this question just ticks me off, especially since the
reason for why I'm single is pretty awful and so
(28:48):
it's very personal. They feel sorry for me. I can
see it because they d list all my good traits
then say it's a shame no man is willing to
win it.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
What the heck.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Unfortunately, I get off guard a lot by people, especially women,
asking this question. But since I can't control the fact
that they ask, I really wish they'd just leave me
the heck alone. I decided to use this method that
I came up with very recently. For example, if a
woman asks why I'm still single, I just tell her
because I still haven't met your husband or boyfriend yet,
(29:19):
while acting somewhat flirty in the moment. So far, it
seemed to shut them off. It's kind of passive aggressive, yes,
but I just feel some sort of power doing it well.
A few weeks ago, my sister introduced me to her
boyfriend's sister, and once she sits down, she asks how.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
Old are you?
Speaker 1 (29:36):
I tell her, and she gasps and goes on to
ask why are you still single. I look at her
and say it's because I still haven't met your boyfriend yet.
She has a boyfriend, yay her, in the flirtiest tone
I could muster, while also pulling the duck face pose.
She looks at me in utter shock, then puts her
coffee down while my sister stares at me like what
(29:57):
the heck. Conversation gets awkward, and minutes later she gets up,
saying she wasn't feeling well and leaves quietly. My sister
blows up at me, asking why I just said that,
and I start arguing with her about how this woman
was a snoop. She told me to get over myself
and act my age and stop being childish, which she
assumed is the reason why I'm still single and will
(30:19):
always be because no man wants to be with such
a nutjob. Her boyfriend said, I upset his sister and
is expecting apologies from me because of what I said
to her, So am I the jerk? I'm going to
say as soft, you're the jerk. Yes, the questions are
invasive and unkind, and yes you have the right to
your privacy, but there's no reason to be nasty about it.
(30:41):
I one hundred percent agree that people questioning why you're
single are annoying and offensive. I get it, hence the
soft you're the jerk, But there are better ways to
deflect or get someone to mind their own business. Personally,
I'd use the why method. When someone asks you an
invasive question, just say why and a neutral and curious tone.
They will follow up with I'm curious or something. Reply
(31:04):
with why. Basically continue to ask why to every response,
and enjoy watching them flounder as they attempt to explain
and justify their invasive interest. It's a similar technique to
saying I don't get it, can you explain it to me?
When someone makes an offensive joke at someone else's expense,
and watching them flounder as they have to explain why
it's funny to be offensive. Eventually one of two things
(31:26):
will happen. They will get bored of the why and
change the subject, or they will get frustrated. Either way,
you keep the moral high ground because no reasonable person
can say you are being offensive by just asking why.
The key is to keep your tone neutral, curious, as
though you genuinely don't understand the question.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Try it and.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
See everyone sucks here. It's incredibly rude to ask someone
why they're single, but your response is obnoxious and trashy too.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I agree with this.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I can't comment on op situation and what she's dealt with,
but would it be wrong to comment it's a personal reason.
I won't disclose and leave it at that. If they
pry further, then you say it one more time and
leave if it goes any further. I think it is
incredibly inappropriate that people continue to ask these questions to her,
but I find it is always better to handle all
things with class and straight boundaries. Well, who do you
(32:17):
think is the jerk? Please let us know some people
just can't mind their own business. Support our channel by
joining as a member today and we'll give you a
shout out in our next video.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Or come watch this video next. You won't believe what
Karen does in that one
Hey there, mister Redder here, welcome back to another episode
of Redded Podcast Stories. Our first story we'll be reading today,
my parents, brother and sister in law showed up to
Christmas at my house when they knew they weren't welcome.
After that, am I the jerk for dropping out as
my brother's best man a couple of days before his wedding?
Speaker 2 (00:18):
And after that?
Speaker 1 (00:19):
No, you tell me right now exactly what's taking so long?
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Your wish is my command. Now.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
For every thumbs up this video gets one, Karen does
not get to crash anyone's Christmas party, bomb bug, So
please smash that like button and subscribe and turn on
notifications for news stories from Reddit. Every single day, my parents,
brother and sister in law showed up to Christmas at
my house when they knew they weren't welcome. I was
(00:46):
trying to keep things to two posts, but I realized
while compiling everything that Part two is just too long,
so I've divided it into a part three for those
who commented in mass. For me to get cameras, I
will when I can afford it. I'm still in fine
ancial recovery from buying a house last year, and as
far as I know good cameras need a decent computer
to record to, and I don't have anything more than
(01:07):
a three year old laptop that runs Windows ten. Yes,
I'm aware of doorbell cameras. That will be the first
kind I get. For those who kept saying that I
should have just gotten my brother and sister in law arrested,
the only reason I didn't was because they are parents,
their kids need them, and if Dan was arrested, he'd
likely lose his job, and without that, his family has
no money, and sister in law has a three month
(01:29):
old baby right now.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Neither of them need to end up in jail. But
you don't need jail for revenge.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Police can help, yes, but I got payback without filing
a police report. Would I be this merciful again? More
than likely not, and they know it. I decided to
wait on making an account and posting until after the
new year, just in case more stuff happened, and it did.
As previous readers know, my sister in law was making passive,
aggressive posts on social media that were obviously directed at me,
(01:57):
especially after sister in law had her fourth baby, and no,
she was posting the same repetitive nonsense over and over again.
She just found semi clever ways of rewording it, but
she pretty much just kept regurgitating that she was tired
of living with my parents, that there isn't enough space,
she needs her own house, blah blah blah. I know
I sound dismissive, but live through what I have with
(02:18):
these people, and you'd be ready to sarcastically play tiny
violins in front of them too.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
They're just that bad.
Speaker 1 (02:25):
And since I waited until January to make an account,
more happened just like I thought. I stated before that
I'd invited half the family for a Christmas Eve party
at my house, and everyone I invited all came, even
though it was a fairly long drive of around three
to four hours for them, but they wanted to come
and show me their support. I was praised by them
a lot for how hard I'd worked to get a
(02:46):
house of my own, and that they were sorry for
everything I'd went through. I was asked why I didn't
just take my camper and drive the three hours back
to them instead of living pretty much homeless for so long,
and I had to sheepishly admit that I was very
attached to living around here and I had my best
employment opportunities in this area. My hometown doesn't have a
lot of great job opportunities in my field, if any
(03:07):
at all, and I wanted to make my own way
as much as I could, an answer that they overall accepted.
We moved on to having a rather nice party, the
best I had been in in years. Some relatives even
brought CDs of great Christmas albums, and I have to
say the one my uncle brought of Ray Charles was
my favorite. He sings Christmas songs like no one else
(03:27):
I've heard. It was a grand and happy time. I
felt like, for once I could just forget my past
issues and enjoy the moment. But I wouldn't be riding
this if it had stayed that way. About two hours
into the party, you know who showed up. My parents,
brother and sister in law popped in trying to look
all smiles. They didn't even knock, just walked right in
(03:48):
through my front door like they were meant to be there.
I shut off the music and told them that they
needed to leave immediately. They begged to stay and said
that they had brought gifts. One of my uncles stood
up and yelled at them before I got another chance
to speak, and he said that they don't deserve to
be in my home or my life after the crap
they tried to pull months earlier, and he was backed
(04:08):
up by several other relatives. Mind you, this guy is
my mother's brother and he used to love her to
pieces until he found out about the crap that went
on between me and my parents. My grandparents mother's parents,
as old as they are, hurriedly got in between us
and said to my parents that if they want to
make amends with me, it's far too soon, and they've
never been more disappointed in them than they were this
(04:30):
past year. They'd hidden their favoritism from my brother from
prying eyes for a long time, but no one was
fooled anymore, and they needed to make a serious effort
to try and actually treat me like a son if
they ever wanted to be in my life again. Then
they turned to Dan and sister in law and said
they've seen the repetitive nonsense sister in law keeps posting about.
They're tired of it, and they just let it go. Already,
(04:52):
my house will not become their new home. Sister in
law went back to her old standard of crying and
had a pity party about how she should be the
one living in this house and not me. She plopped
down in a chair to have a tantrum and say
it wasn't fair I got this house to myself when
I have no family of my own, and she has
four kids that need more space, and she just wanted
(05:12):
a better place to live in and feel like a
real mom.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
It was petty of me.
Speaker 1 (05:17):
But I loudly pointed out that she sucks as a
mother because she lets my mother do most of the
parenting while she sits on her butt all day drinking,
playing on her phone, or going out and spending all
of Dan's money, and she has the nerve to complain
about it. I even joked that I'm surprised her baby
doesn't get drunk from drinking her milk since she drinks
so much booze, which I admit went a bit too
(05:38):
far because I got some stairs and sister in law
demanded to know if I was calling her a bad mom.
I said the evidence speaks for itself, and if she
wanted to be able to afford to move out of
my parent's house someday, then she needs to put her
college degree to some use, get a job and learn
to save money. My mother already does most of the
childcare for my brother's kids anyway, so she'd have plenty
(05:59):
of time after her baby gets a little older. My
brother's eldest kid, who seven, ran up and started kicking
and screaming at me for yelling at his mom, and
he kept going off on me about how his mom
said that I was the bad guy who made her
cry and didn't let them live here. That's when my
brother grabbed his son to pull him away, but all
the other relatives jumped back in and this sort of
(06:20):
turned into a family intervention against my sister in law
and brother. She was crying, her new baby was crying,
her kids were crying. Heck, even Dan was very nearly
in tears from the verbal lashing he was being assaulted with.
He ended up just sitting on the autumn and I
keep shoes in by the front door and looking like
a complete wreck. He couldn't look anyone in the eye.
(06:40):
He couldn't even say two words to me, not with
a whole house filled with angry people ready to judge
him if he tried to let out his inner golden
child again. If they weren't there to get in his way.
I'd bet this would have ended up a repeat of
when he tried to order me around and tried to
take my house months earlier. By this point, though, he
had been so thoroughly humiliated that his and my parents'
(07:01):
reputation in the family was completely destroyed. Because the masks
were all off now. Soon after my parents, brother and
sister in law all left in defeat, the party resumed
and we all avoided speaking of what just happened for
the rest of the evening. Since most of the adults
had been drinking. Everyone stayed the night in my house.
I even let some of them sleep in the camper
(07:22):
so there'd be enough space. I admit it also makes
a good guest house. My relatives all wanted a tour
of it earlier as well, and they said they couldn't
believe I'd been living in it for around two years.
I got a lot of questions about it, like what
summer and winter was like and so on. I was
up earlier than anyone else Christmas morning and had a
fresh pot of coffee and some iberprofen for those spiked
(07:43):
eggnog hangovers a few of them had. I was complimented
on being a way nicer host than my parents ever were,
and we all agreed to do this again next Christmas.
After Christmas, sister in law did finally stop making posts
that were obviously digs at me, and deleted all of
the old ones as well. Shortly after the new year,
she more recently made a new post complaining about how
(08:04):
she had tried to convince my parents to get her
a camper like I did, so he could be set
up in the backyard so Dan and his family could
use the whole house as their family home. Well, a
taste of one's own medicine is never fun, because my
parents turn that idea down vehemently. I hear no one
is going to push them out of their own home,
let alone their master bedroom. The post was only up
(08:25):
for a couple of days before sister in law removed it,
and she has hardly posted anything since then. She loves
to complain, but if a tree falls and no one
is around to hear it, can it still complain? Sister
in law, I guess, has realized there's no point in
doing it when no one hears her anymore, and Dan
can't afford to move his family out on his salary
alone anytime soon. If they end up expecting another kid
(08:47):
in the next few years, I won't be surprised. Things
mellowed down for me since then, and I've even invited
friends over for a poker night. I suck at poker
because I can never remember a darn thing about it,
but so what. We get to drink beer and eat
other young food while being merry idiots. We all loaded
up on whoppers from Burger King and just had at
it the best way for grown men can when they
(09:08):
just want to have a good, unadulterated time and get drunk.
I think maybe around summer I'll look into possibly dating someone.
I'm not exactly getting younger here, fingers crossed. That goes well.
My camper just sits idle in my yard now, and
I admit there were some times I went out there
just to spend time in it.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
I did live in it for two years.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
It's like my second home, and maybe one day I'll
actually get to use it for camping like it was
meant to be. I've never been camping. My parents considered
it a waste of time, so it'd be completely a
new experience for me. This pretty much marks the end
of what happened, my parents, brother and sister in law
have all been staying very clear of me.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
In fact, they seem to.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
Have gone back to acting like I don't exist, like
they did before I bought a house. Not like that
bothers me at all. It's better that way. But they'll
inevitably come back in some way. I know they will.
I just wonder what kind of stupid thing they'll do next.
If anything notable like all of this ever happens again,
I'll make another post if this account is still active.
I hope o Pe can have a movie made about
(10:07):
his life. Can you imagine how good it would be?
Am I the jerk for dropping out? Is my brother's
best man a couple of days before his wedding. I'm
thirty six and my brother, who's thirty got married this
past weekend.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I was supposed to be as best man.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
The wedding was twelve enough because they didn't want to
have to deal with toddlers and such, which is fair enough.
A lot of guests do have younger kids, though, so
they decided to have a venue nearby with a professional
sitter if parents wanted to drop their kids off there.
My wife has some injuries that make her slow to
respond and understand what others are saying, and she needs
help sometimes with her food. I'll cut it up into
(10:42):
small pieces. This doesn't mean she's nothing, and she's a smart,
capable woman. They had the rehearsal dinner. At the end,
my sister in law pulled me aside, saying she had
to discuss something with me. She said, they told us
about the additional venue they'll be having for their wedding.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
I said yes.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Then she asked if my wife had any particular food
preferences and they would order extra food for her there.
I was extremely confused and told her we already gave
our meal choices, but she said my wife would be
better suited at this second venue. I remember just sort
of staring at her for a bit and asking if
she was serious that she expected my wife to be
with the babysitter. Sister in law said, it's not like that,
(11:21):
and they're just looking out for my wife and I
don't have to feed her or anything and can have
fun at the wedding. My brother came over and I
told him I've literally never heard such crap that they
think my wife is a kid to be left with
a sitter. Brother said it's for the best and if
I want, I can always go over and check on her.
I told him, if this is the way they're treating
(11:42):
my wife, I have no desire to be a part
of their crap show and dropped out as best man. Well,
all heck broke loose, and some people agreed that I
was right, but my parents texted called everything saying that
they don't agree with this either, but it's their choice
and to get over my ego and still calm. I
didn't end up going. I did hear that they got
(12:03):
one of the groomsmen to give a speech, and overall
it was fine, but my brother sent me a text
saying he expected better from me. I replied back saying
I expected better from him. My sister in law sent
a long text that I ruined their big day on
purpose and made them look bad.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Not the jerk. Sister in law ruined the day herself.
Nothing to do with you.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
Also, can't believe your parents' reaction either, op I mean,
my parents didn't agree with this, but they said to
put it aside for one day and the wedding wasn't
the place to make a stand. Then yell at them
later if I wanted to. A couple of others also
said this, which is why I'm doubting if I went
too far for not just attending and then telling them later.
The last thing I wanted to do was miss my
(12:45):
own brother's wedding. But I just feel like they're the
ones that put me in this position. My wife always
comes first. No, you tell me right now exactly what's
taking so long?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Your wish is my command?
Speaker 1 (12:58):
More drive through Mayhem in suit whose last night at
your local Mendy's. We've had a lot of terrible and
weird things happen lately, and as our sister store we
call Mendy's Ray Road is perpetually closed, we get our
usual rush of customers combined with all of the mobile
and uber eats and door dash and food slaps and
you name it, spilling over to our location. It's hectic.
(13:19):
We're running out of things. It's literal mayhem. I take
order number five to one. As I begin to assemble
their drinks as is the process, I noticed that the
four drinks they ordered suddenly can't be made due to
the flavor being out. I need to change out the
syrup to the freestyle machine. Just as I realize the
machine's running out, I hear the bloop that alerts me
(13:40):
to the entry of a new customer in the drive through.
I'm about to greet them, which I always managed to
do within two seconds of approaching the speaker box, but
these people were yelling right as they pulled up, saying.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
Yeah, hello, Hello.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
I lay a little louder into my already interrupted greeting, saying, Hi,
welcome to Mendy's.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Please hold for a minute while I, Oh, my god,
you talked to the last guy.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
The customer chimes in. More attitude was in this than
I can accurately depict. I usually say that I'll be
with them in a second, but this time I was
about to say that they'd need to hold on for
a couple of minutes due to my situation. They interrupted,
so I just took care of the things that I
needed to. I managed to get the keys from my
manager to open the closet to get the drink mix
and pour the four drinks, and then set the next order.
(14:27):
While I was running all over the place, I heard
increasingly angrier grumbles along the way, so I did my
due diligence and said just another minute or two every
so often.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
I thought this helped. Evidently it didn't.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
As soon as I'm back to my ordering machine and
re greet the customers with a thanks for waiting. How
can I help you, I hear the following ear piercing rand.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
What in the world took you so long?
Speaker 1 (14:50):
I reply, as kindly as possible, despite having someone threaten
me earlier this week. Ma'am, I'm sorry about that, but
I can take your order now.
Speaker 2 (14:59):
She went full local.
Speaker 1 (15:00):
Again, saying no, no, no, you tell me right now
exactly what's taking so long?
Speaker 2 (15:07):
Inter malicious compliance.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
What could have been an easy thirty seconds of ordering
and then beginning to make her family's food turned into
a debacle now thanks to malicious compliance. I'll tell you
exactly what's taking so long? Okay, Well I didn't start
off and drive through. Actually I was on the grill first.
I really liked the grill. I missed the freedom more
than anything, you know what I mean? This was a
rhetorical question, but I know that the machine that connects
(15:32):
them to my headset was still on and unable to
not be because the line was so backed up. So anyway,
where was I? Oh? Yeah, Well, the customer three cars
before you ordered a sprite. Well, actually a cier missed
but settled for sprite because coke products. You know that
sprite was the last sprite and I knew it, so
I tried to get a hold of my manager. I
(15:52):
went on telling them the story forever. During this whole thing,
I could hear an occasional beginning of a sentence or two.
But look who all all of a sudden didn't yell
her scream anymore. Her frustration was at a boil, though
I just didn't realize it yet. Somebody did boil over
besides her. The car behind this group. They were honking
the whole while. It was like a symphony of people
(16:13):
telling their life stories overlapping one another. Samantha, my coworker,
even chimed in and backed up how busy and crazy
it was this week. I then finished with a I
guess that leads us up to write this moment. Would
you like to order?
Speaker 2 (16:26):
They replied with an exasperated well, I didn't mean your
whole life story.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Ask and he shall receive as petty and snide as
this may seem, it was just what I needed to
get stuff off my chest and let me prepare for
the next group of customers who lie and wait to
mistreat me another day. Am I the jerk for making
homemade food for everyone except my brother's stepdaughter I twenty
seven female. I'm not a professional chef, but I have
(16:53):
taken a bunch of cooking glasses and love making elaborate
meals for friends and family. About two years ago, my
brother Greg, twenty five male, married Cheryl thirty four female.
Cheryl has a daughter from a previous relationship, Becca, who's nine,
who has several health conditions, including celiac and a severe
dairy allergy that requires her to carry an EpiPen. Last weekend,
(17:14):
I hosted a dinner at my house for my parents'
wedding anniversary. I made a fancy five course dinner, and
in addition to my parents, I invited four close family friends, Greg, Cheryl,
and Becca, and my sister, her boyfriend and their twins,
who are both eight. Because of Becca's food restrictions, I
found a restaurant in town that specializes in gluten free,
dairy free, as well as other allergen free food and
(17:36):
arranged for them to make a full meal for Becca
that I could pick up in advance.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
For the party.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
I've made a variety of specialty meals in the past,
for example, keto meals when my friend was following that diet,
and I like the challenge, but knowing how serious Becca's
restrictions were, I didn't trust myself to make her meal.
I have ADHD and get easily distracted, and even if
I used the wrong spoon or didn't completely wash some
flowers off of a bowl, it could make her incredibly sick.
(18:03):
I thought the takeout solution was fine, but when I
served the food, I saw Cheryl looking at Becca's plate
with a stony face. For her part, Becha started eating
and seemed fine. Cheryl whispered to Greg, and Greg asked
if he could talk to me in the kitchen when
we got there.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
He said that it was unbelievable that.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
I couldn't be bothered to make something for Becca, that
they had been bragging about what a great cook I
am to her, and that he knew I'd make keto,
vegan and other complicated kinds of foods in the past.
Speaker 2 (18:31):
Now she would feel.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Left out because she didn't get to eat what the
rest of the family was eating. He said that it
was obvious that I didn't care about making his stepdaughter
feel like a part of the family, and that they
were leaving Greg. Cheryl, and Becca then left, which put
a damper on the rest of the party. I felt
like I did my best at the time, but in hindsight,
I wonder if I should have tried harder to make
Becca feel included since she is a relatively new addition
(18:54):
to our family. Am I the jerk for some reason?
I read that and I felt sad for you. I'm
honestly in disbelief you thought you did something wrong. You
were incredibly thoughtful in how you handled and sharing she
had a meal.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Suitable for her.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
You have ADHD and are well aware that mistakes are
so easily made, so to ensure you didn't seriously put
her health in danger, you decided the safest option was
to contact a restaurant to provide something. I can't stress
this enough.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
You are not the jerk. Same here.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
If someone had gone to the trouble of making sure
my kid didn't have a reaction to dinner, I would
have been grateful, not upset. I don't have ADHD, but
if I didn't cook for someone with allergies on a
regular basis, I definitely would forget something. You are most
definitely not the jerk, and it's sad they couldn't appreciate
your effort.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Not the jerk.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
If you accidentally made a Keto meal wrong, it would
upset their diet. It sounds like if you made Becca's
meal incorrectly, it could have major medical consequences. You're not
wrong for not wanting that stress on you. Did your
brother understand the reason why you ordered her a special
meal that you were concerned about doing something that might
make her sick. My sister in law has food restrictions,
(20:02):
and I've never heard her say anything but appreciation when
others have done something similar for her. He was very
angry when we talked, so I couldn't get a word
in edgewise. I spoke to Cheryl about this issue when
she asked if I could make an allerge and free
cake for Becca's birthday last year. I told her about
my anxiety over possibly making her sick and offered to
make flower decorations if she could find a suitable cake,
(20:24):
which she did. I mistakingly assumed, based on this conversation
that she understood my hesitation to cook for Becca. Am
I the jerk for being disrespectful to my boyfriend's sister.
I'm twenty four female. My boyfriend Zach twenty four male.
His mother passed when he was only eleven. His father
worked a lot, so Zach's older sister at least who's
(20:46):
now thirty, basically became the woman of the house for
a lack of a better term. She cooked all the meals,
cleaned the house, drove Zack to school and other activities,
et cetera. She was extremely parentified, and I do feel
for her on that front. She went to a local college.
Because of all this, Zach and Elise are very close.
He has a lot of respect for her. Zach and
(21:07):
I have dated for nearly a year. We are very
different in terms of backgrounds. He's much more reserved than
I am. Before me, he spent a lot of his.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Weekends gaming or just hanging out with a small group
of friends. I tend to go out. I work hard
all week and want to enjoy the time I have off.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Zack is a shy, somewhat nerdy guy, and I do
think I've broken him out of his shell a little,
pushing him to do things out of his comfort zone.
Elise and their father have made several comments about him changing.
She's very nice and cordial when we see each other,
but she's made several comments about Zach not needing to
change who he is. Sunday, Zack invited myself, some of
(21:43):
his friends, his dad, sister, brother in law, and niece
over to watch the game. At one point, vacations got
brought up. I mentioned I was trying to convince him
to go on a two day local cruise with me,
as he's never been on one. Zach reminded me he's
not the biggest fan of boats. I pointed out he's
never been on one, and we could rent one to
take out so he could get used to it. He
(22:04):
was somewhat on the fence. Myself and one of his
buddies were trying to help him see it's not that
bad at least. Butted in and said, if he doesn't
want to go, then I'm sure you can find someone
else to go. I said, I was pretty sure I
could talk him into it. She asked why I would
want him to go if he really didn't want to.
I said, of course, I would never try to force
him to go, but it's just something to think about.
(22:26):
She repeated that he doesn't like boats and that I
should respect that. I rolled my eyes, not really understanding
why she was so adamant on this, and said she
needed to relax. She's not his mother, she shouldn't care
this much about the situation. At least was clearly upset
by the comment, but didn't say anything else. The subject
got changed and I thought all was well. A little later,
(22:46):
Zack asked for my help getting something out of his room.
Once in there, he told me I was out of
line for how I spoke to his sister. I said
she was the one that was getting up in our business.
Zach said that I kept pushing it and got upset
when I said, well, clearly she and your dad didn't
push you enough to try new things. He said I
was being disrespectful and needed to apologize to Alice. I
(23:08):
laughed and said, no, she needs to butt out. Zach
finally asked me to leave. I did, aggravated. I really
thought my friends would be on my side, but they
said I crossed a line. Am I the jerk? You're
the jerk you're saying? I managed to break him out
of his shell says a lot here. It seems like
you're constantly pushing him to do things he wouldn't necessarily
(23:29):
do otherwise, and I think this is not healthy. What's
wrong with being shy and not wanting to do some things?
Your way isn't the only correct way. And you did
push him on this occasion too, and you were being
disrespectful to his sister. I get that you want to
get him out of his comfort zone, but ganging up
on him with his friend trying to get him to
do something he doesn't want to is called bullying. It's
(23:50):
you deciding you know what he'll like better than he
does and ignoring what he has to say. He's the
one who should have spoken of but likely didn't want
to embarrass you by telling you to shut up, and
his sister stepped in to stop a bully.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
So yeah, you're the jerk. You're the jerk.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Your boyfriend does not like boats. If it's clear that
someone doesn't want to do a particular vacation plan, you
attempting to pressure him into it makes it extremely clear
that this is a vacation for you, not the both
of you. Find something you can both enjoy which may
or may not require you both stepping out of your
comfort zone. But to a lesser degree than something one
person has expressed a strong dislike of doing. Remember that
(24:28):
not only is his sister not his mother, but she's
extremely close to it.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
You are also not his mother.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Am I the jerk for telling my brother in law
to get over himself and to quit holding a ten
year grudge? My brother in law, married to my sister,
is a general contractor. About ten years ago, my dad
and brother were building a deck at my parents' home.
They asked my brother in law if they could borrow
his skidloader. When he said no, they prepared the ground
as best they could without the skidloader, but got to
(24:56):
the point where they couldn't go on without it. They
went to my sister's house to ask again, but found
out brother in law was out of town. They talked
my sister into letting them borrow it, so she took
them down to his construction lot and they hooked it
up to my dad's truck. This next part I'm not
sure of since I don't know much about towing, but
from what I was told, Dad's truck wasn't big enough
(25:17):
or powerful enough to tow the skidloader on the dump trailer,
so he lost control. And ranked the truck, trailer and
skidloader were totaled. The insurance was barely enough to cover
the medical costs in the truck. There was none left
over to cover brother in law stuff. When he got
back to town, he exploded, He threatened to sue, and
things just went downhill from there. My parents are not
(25:39):
rich and he wouldn't have gotten anything, so in the end,
sister talked him into letting it go. However, from that
day on he would have nothing to do with our family.
He doesn't come for birthdays, holidays, nothing at all. Next
month is our parents' fiftieth anniversary and we're planning a
big family gathering to celebrate. We're also chipping in to
send our parents on a cruise to Mexico because they've
(26:00):
never been out of the country. I spoke to sister
about it the other day and she said she's coming
with the kids, but brother in law is not coming.
I was fine with that, but when we were discussing
their portion of the cruise money, I heard him yelling
in the background to deduct their portion from the cost
of the skidloader and dump trailer.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
That really upset me.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
So after my call with my sis, I called my
brother in law and told him to get over himself.
I told him Dad and Bro made a mistake, but
that was ten years ago and he needs to let
it go. He said he'll let it go when they
give him the money that he lost. I told him
he's a jerk for holding onto a grudge and putting
money in the way of a family relationship. Sister called
(26:39):
me a few minutes ago and said they're not coming
and that I was out of line. We argued for
a bit and that's where it stands. I don't think
I'm wrong for telling him to let go of the past,
but they're not coming to the anniversary party, So now
I'm not sure you're the jerk. Your family stole fifty
thousand dollars in work equipment from your brother in law.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
They didn't pay him back.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
By the sounds of it, they showed zero remorse and
he should just get over it. You and your family
sound massively entitled. Your brother in law is smart to
cut the lot of you off clean. You're the jerk,
so are your parents. They shouldn't have stolen his property,
and yes it was theft. They should have made him
whole before replacing their own property. They should have apologized.
(27:22):
They should have given him the money back at some
point over the last ten years, would have considered everyone
sucks here if your parents had made any effort to
take responsibility. What's missing from your story is where your
father and brother took accountability for their actions which caused
real damages for another person, and worked sincerely to make
up for it. If the insure incident cover everyone's damages,
(27:43):
then after necessary medical costs, the skidloaders should have been
fixed because your brother in law was the innocent party. Instead,
your dad put that money towards his own truck. Your
brother in law was extremely kind not to sue. It's
been ten years, so how much of the damages have
your father and brother paid back? If the answer isn't
all of it, then not only are they complete and
(28:03):
utter great a jerks, but so are you. You're the
jerk in this latest chapter of the story for blaming
the victim for not just rolling over and accepting his
awful in law's actual criminal behavior. Good for your sister
for standing by the right person. In this chapter, Karen
keeps asking why are you still single? My response shuts
her up quick I thirty six year old single female
(28:27):
get asked this question a lot, and since it comes
from coworkers, extended family, friends of friends, then responding rudely
by saying, none of your darn business, sweetie, still doesn't
seem to work, not anymore. I try to keep good
relationships with those around me for a number of reasons,
but this question just ticks me off, especially since the
reason for why I'm single is pretty awful and so
(28:48):
it's very personal. They feel sorry for me. I can
see it because they d list all my good traits
then say it's a shame no man is willing to
win it.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
What the heck.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Unfortunately, I get off guard a lot by people, especially women,
asking this question. But since I can't control the fact
that they ask, I really wish they'd just leave me
the heck alone. I decided to use this method that
I came up with very recently. For example, if a
woman asks why I'm still single, I just tell her
because I still haven't met your husband or boyfriend yet,
(29:19):
while acting somewhat flirty in the moment. So far, it
seemed to shut them off. It's kind of passive aggressive, yes,
but I just feel some sort of power doing it well.
A few weeks ago, my sister introduced me to her
boyfriend's sister, and once she sits down, she asks how.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
Old are you?
Speaker 1 (29:36):
I tell her, and she gasps and goes on to
ask why are you still single. I look at her
and say it's because I still haven't met your boyfriend yet.
She has a boyfriend, yay her, in the flirtiest tone
I could muster, while also pulling the duck face pose.
She looks at me in utter shock, then puts her
coffee down while my sister stares at me like what
(29:57):
the heck. Conversation gets awkward, and minutes later she gets up,
saying she wasn't feeling well and leaves quietly. My sister
blows up at me, asking why I just said that,
and I start arguing with her about how this woman
was a snoop. She told me to get over myself
and act my age and stop being childish, which she
assumed is the reason why I'm still single and will
(30:19):
always be because no man wants to be with such
a nutjob. Her boyfriend said, I upset his sister and
is expecting apologies from me because of what I said
to her, So am I the jerk? I'm going to
say as soft, you're the jerk. Yes, the questions are
invasive and unkind, and yes you have the right to
your privacy, but there's no reason to be nasty about it.
(30:41):
I one hundred percent agree that people questioning why you're
single are annoying and offensive. I get it, hence the
soft you're the jerk, But there are better ways to
deflect or get someone to mind their own business. Personally,
I'd use the why method. When someone asks you an
invasive question, just say why and a neutral and curious tone.
They will follow up with I'm curious or something. Reply
(31:04):
with why. Basically continue to ask why to every response,
and enjoy watching them flounder as they attempt to explain
and justify their invasive interest. It's a similar technique to
saying I don't get it, can you explain it to me?
When someone makes an offensive joke at someone else's expense,
and watching them flounder as they have to explain why
it's funny to be offensive. Eventually one of two things
(31:26):
will happen. They will get bored of the why and
change the subject, or they will get frustrated. Either way,
you keep the moral high ground because no reasonable person
can say you are being offensive by just asking why.
The key is to keep your tone neutral, curious, as
though you genuinely don't understand the question.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Try it and.
Speaker 1 (31:44):
See everyone sucks here. It's incredibly rude to ask someone
why they're single, but your response is obnoxious and trashy too.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I agree with this.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I can't comment on op situation and what she's dealt with,
but would it be wrong to comment it's a personal reason.
I won't disclose and leave it at that. If they
pry further, then you say it one more time and
leave if it goes any further. I think it is
incredibly inappropriate that people continue to ask these questions to her,
but I find it is always better to handle all
things with class and straight boundaries. Well, who do you
(32:17):
think is the jerk? Please let us know some people
just can't mind their own business. Support our channel by
joining as a member today and we'll give you a
shout out in our next video.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Or come watch this video next. You won't believe what
Karen does in that one
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!