Wife's Obsession with Cleanliness Drives Husband Crazy! - Reddit Stories - Reddit Stories Podcast - Mr. Redder

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey there, mister Redder here, welcome back to another episode
of Reddit podcast Stories. Our first story we'll be reading today,
My wife's obsession with cleanliness is driving me crazy. After that,
am I the jerk for wanting my son to move
back closer to his family? And after that my aunt
stole my inheritance? Then her whole life fell apart. Now,

(00:20):
for every thumbs up, this video gits one, Karen has
to wipe down the toilets. The only thing I'll be
wiping is that smirk off your face, fitted boy, So
please smash that like button and subscribe and turn on
notifications for new stories from Reddit every single day. My
wife's obsession with cleanliness is driving me crazy. I had

(00:40):
a major fight with my wife a few hours ago,
and I strongly think I'm in the right, but she's
so angry I almost feel like I'm the crazy one.
I'll provide context. I married my wife three years ago,
but we've been together for six. One important thing is
to note that she's extremely clean. I regret not moving
in together until we got married, because while I knew

(01:00):
she was clean, I didn't know to the full extent.
Let this be a lesson to live with your partner
before marriage. She's the reason why our house looks like
a model home. She hates dishes in the sink, while
I'm content to let them sit there for a couple days.
She spends her days off scrubbing bathrooms because in her mind,
they should be cleaned weekly. She doesn't let me bring
my shoes inside and insists that I shower immediately when

(01:24):
I get home before laying in bed. There are a
million more things, but hopefully you have an idea. This
didn't start hurting our marriage until we had kids. We
have a two year old and a one year old.
I'm a stay at home dad. I left work when
our youngest was born, and that's when our disagreement on
how clean the home needs to be started to get bad.
She expects me to do most of the chores now,

(01:45):
when it used to be primarily her and I wouldn't
mind if they were reasonable. She wants the kids to
have a bath every single day, and I think every
one to three days is fine. She wants all of
their toys put away by the end of the day,
and I think there's no point when it will be
a mess again. She wants the dishes done daily. She
wants all house bedding washed weekly. She wants me to

(02:06):
vacuum weekly. She wants me to mop every three to
four days, since, in her logic, the kids spend a
lot of time playing on the floor, they won't get
hurt or be sick if I mop every two weeks.
Because I don't play along with most of her demands,
she ends up being the one to do most of
the housework when she gets home or on her rare
off days. She works forty to eighty hours a week,

(02:26):
so it is a lot, but she does it to herself.
I feel I do what's reasonable. This all built up
to today. She got home and saw that I hadn't
yet washed the dishes, and there was still grease and
food in some of the pens and on the countertop. Also,
I hadn't yet brought in the trash cans from the
previous two days when they were emptied. She flew off
the handle, calling me lazy in the slob. She said

(02:48):
she would like for me to return to work, since
in her eyes, I'm doing a poor job and use
the money to hire a weekly housekeeper and a nanny
who wouldn't leave the kids in pjs all day. I
got upset and I told her she's crazy and she
works herself up over small things, and I will not
be leaving my kids with a stranger. She packed a
bag for herself and our babies and went to her

(03:09):
mom's house. I'm furious. Am I the jerk? You're the jerk?
Your standards are too low? I am someone who genuinely
has always struggled with keeping my environment clean. But dishes
should be done every day. The house should be vacuumed
like every other day, not even weekly. Mopping every few
days is normal. Washing yourself before getting in bed is

(03:31):
my preference as well. Washing sheets weekly is standard. Picking
up all the toys and putting them completely away at
night is incredibly good for your mental health. Kids are
definitely washed every day, soap is every other day. The
PJ thing, though there's definitely one day a week on
the weekends where we're all in pj's all day. Are
you doing this every day based on your standards? I'm

(03:53):
actually wondering if maybe you're depressed or have ADHD. I
have ADHD, and I know that doing the bare minimum
is maybe talk to someone and see if you can
work through this. You're the jerk. Every single thing you
listed as her cleanliness standards are very reasonable. In my book,
they are the same standards I have in my home.
If I had kids, they would likely be stricter, since

(04:15):
kids touch everything, put stuff in their mouths, and roll
around on the floor. In my book, I would consider
you a slob. Right now, your wife is coming home
to a place where she doesn't feel comfortable living in.
Regardless of how you feel about cleanliness, she isn't comfortable
in her own home. That, in my opinion, supersedes your
disagreement about cleanliness standards. Think of how you would feel

(04:36):
in her place. From what I'm reading here, you're a
stay at home dad and you're not keeping up your
end of the bargain. If you don't think you should
clean that often, then she's right. You should go back
to work and hire someone to help clean your house. Well,
who do you think is the jerk OPI or his wife?
Please let us know if you're a neat freak like
I am, never get into a relationship with a slob.

(04:59):
You'll end up present them more than you can imagine.
Am I the jerk for wanting my son to move
back closer to his family? I'm fifty six female, and
I live with my husband, who's sixty four. We only
have one son, who's thirty three, who currently lives abroad,
and we only see him once a year as it's
very far away and expensive to go. We live in
a small town. He moved away when he was eighteen

(05:20):
for college and never came back. We expected him to
move back after he graduated, but he decided to stay
where he was since he already had a job and
a girlfriend there. They got married. Our town is close
to our state's capital, where his work field is very strong.
Ever since his senior year in college, I've been trying
to convince him to move closer for a better career
and to stay closer to his family. He never showed

(05:42):
any interest, which I found odd, especially since his wife
also works in the same field. Four years ago, they
moved abroad. I felt betrayed when he told me he
was already living three hours away from us. Why would
he choose to go even further to another country, but
not the city right next to us. I never said
anything about it, other than to let him know that
his father and I are always here if they need us.

(06:04):
Until recently, things were fine. I miss him a lot.
We text every day, but we don't get to speak
to each other often. The problem is my father, who's
eighty four, whose health took a dive and is very fragile,
And with my son living so far, he's missing a
precious time he could be spending right here. His grandfather
is not likely to live many years now. I told

(06:25):
the news to my son and he was sad about it,
and he came to see us and left a week ago.
I was honest with him. I said his grandfather won't
be around much longer, and since he lives so far away,
he'll lose the opportunity to stay close and enjoy the
time he has left. He was not happy about me
touching this matter. He said I was trying to guilt
him into moving back. I asked him why he was

(06:46):
doing this to me. Why doesn't he miss me and
his dad. We're getting old and he's only seeing us
once or twice a year. It's cruel to us. He
said he missed us, but he's happy where he is
and does not plan on moving back, and he and
his wife are already making plays on buying a house
where they live. I couldn't take it. Anymore, and I
burst out crying. I told him I felt abandoned, that

(07:06):
he didn't seem to care for us, and that he
should enjoy his family while he can, because we won't
be around forever. I asked what makes him think he
can't be happy living here and he didn't respond. The
few days after this were very awkward, and after he left,
he seems to be even more distant, avoiding me and
being very short with his text. Yesterday, his wife called

(07:27):
and said my son was feeling bad and had told
her what had happened. She called me a jerk and
said I had no right trying to manipulate him like that,
and I should be ashamed of myself. I don't think
i'm the jerk for wanting my son closer to me.
They're the jerks for abandoning family. And I'm including her
as well, since she did the same. I talked to
her mother often and she's on my side. Edit. I

(07:48):
didn't realize we could edit the original post. I just
want to add some information one. I'm not asking my
son to sell his happiness just to be by my side.
I just can't see why he needed to be so
far away while he and his wife could have a
wonderful career around our area. They could earn more money
while staying close to the family. It's illogical for me
to think about anything different. Two. Somewhere under the impression

(08:11):
I gave up my life to become his mother, and
that's not true. I had my own career, and a
good one. I worked hard to give my son the
best I could. I retired six years ago. Three. I
realize this is a very strong cultural background where we
come from. Family is expected to stay close. My son
was the first member of the family that decided to
move far away. Four. I don't expect to be taken

(08:34):
care of when I get old. Me and my husband
already talked about this, and unless my son wants to,
we will not ask him to take care of us. Five.
Just to clarify, I am not Indian. While I love
India and I've been there once with my husband, I
just want to clarify I'm South American. My son currently
lives in North America. Edit two. I think I'm getting it.

(08:54):
It's really cultural. Most people here seem to be from
the US, and I understand it's really normal for families
to be separated once your kids move to college, and
that they see each other just once a year at
Christmas or Thanksgiving, for example. I was raised to believe
families should stick together. I raised my son to have
the same values, and I expected him to keep this tradition.
But he's broken it. It's not his fault, but I

(09:16):
will never be able to understand this decision. You're the jerk,
not for feeling sad that your son lives far away,
but for constantly trying to guilt him into moving back
when he's made it clear that that's not going to happen.
Adults get to choose for themselves where they want to
live and what career they want. Your son is not
required to move close to you. Oh my goodness. He

(09:37):
left home fifteen years ago. He has a marriage, a life,
and a career in another country. He will never come back,
and expecting him to move for any reason at all
is just absurd. It's not cruel for a thirty three
year old to have his own life. You're the jerk. Sadly,
you're the jerk. As a daughter who immigrated to another country,

(09:58):
I can tell you that if my parents parent said
this to me, I would never want to see them ever. Again.
Lucky for me, I have nice, supportive parents who missed
me and I miss them, but always understood that my
life is mine to live. You're the jerk, and honestly,
given how pushy you seem to be, have you considered
that maybe he doesn't want to move back because he
doesn't want you in his business all the time. Well,

(10:21):
who do you think is the jerk? O PI or
her son? Please let us know. My aunt stole my inheritance,
then her whole life fell apart. My aunt was one
of two kids my grandparents had. My mother was the
polar opposite to my aunt. She worked from the age
of twelve in my grandfather's shop, never asked for anything,
and eventually managed to start her own business. My aunt

(10:43):
never held down a job until the age of twenty six,
was constantly stealing from her parents, and was constantly in trouble.
Despite this, my aunt was spoiled by my grandmother, and
so were her kids. She had three kids from three
different men, and her first husband was not one of them,
if you know what I mean. Didn't matter what my
aunt or her kids did, my grandmother would always jump

(11:04):
to their defense. She never had time for my mum
and her kids, unless it was to get something from us.
The only reason my mum would visit her was because
she loved my grandfather. My grandfather passed in two thousand four,
and a few months after my nan decided to write
up a new will. My mother and my aunt were
both present for it when she signed it, so they
knew what was in it. It made it so that

(11:26):
when she passed, her home would be sold and the
money split twenty five percent each to my mum and aunt,
and the remaining fifty percent would go evenly to the
grand kids. At the time, the home was worth more
than five hundred thousand pounds, so it would be a
nice little inheritance, but nothing life changing. In two thousand ten,
my mom passed after an accident and did not have

(11:46):
a current will in place. As she no longer had
her business and was renting a house, she didn't have
anything of much monetary value. The only thing she was
concerned about was what would be done at her funeral
should she have passed away, but had told me everything
she could wanted, the music, the flowers, the coffin color,
and even what people were to wear at the funeral.
She wanted people to wear bright, warm colors. So when

(12:08):
she passed, my aunt and Nan took over all of
the arrangements and tried to undo all of the things
I'd told them. The songs were going to be songs
I knew Mum didn't like. The flowers were all the
wrong colors, and they picked a hideous coffin. With the
help of my siblings, we were able to change a
few of the things back to the way they were
supposed to be, but the coffin couldn't be changed for
some reason, and my Nan refused to let people come

(12:31):
dressed as clowns, so it was all black. It was frustrating.
After the funeral, my Nan had her will changed. My
siblings and I were told by our aunt that she
didn't have any involvement with the writing of the will,
and our Nan told us that she changed it so
that Mum's share would go to her kids instead. All good,
we thought. After Mom passed, my Nan just stopped talking

(12:52):
about my mom. At first, we thought it was because
she was still recovering from losing her daughter, But even
five years after Mom passed, she still want to talk
about her. Even if you brought up a story about Mom,
Nan would very obviously try and change the subject, usually
about how hard my aunt and her kids had it,
and if you went to talk to her about your
own problems, she would somehow bring it back to my aunt.

(13:15):
I had suffered a mental breakdown after my mom's passing,
so you can imagine how much it hurt to hear well,
they have it so much worse. In twenty sixteen, my
nan passed. She had written down what she wanted to
be done for her funeral, and it was basically all
the same things she had picked out about my mom's funeral,
even the music to be played. I don't know why
she tried to have a dress rehearsal funeral using my

(13:37):
mom as a stand in, but it was obvious that
that's what she was trying to do. So after a
couple of months, our siblings and I were waiting to
hear about the will reading, and my aunt kept telling me, Oh,
it'll be another month before we can do the reading.
I didn't mind. I wasn't fussy about the money, to
be honest, but my oldest brother was hoping to use
the money to pay for a honeymoon for him and

(13:58):
his then fiancee, and my younger her brother was about
to start UNI, so it would be a huge health Eventually,
my dad bumped into the solicitor my grandmother had used
to deal with her will and asked what was happening.
The solicitor let slip that the will had already been
read and that it left everything to my aunt. When
my dad questioned this, the solicitor told him that my
aunt had been present when the will was written, despite

(14:20):
promising that she had nothing to do with it. When confronted,
my aunt initially tried to deny, but eventually admitted to
lying to all of us. She showed us the will
and it confirmed what we already knew. The house and
all its contents were now my aunt's. This included my
granddad's war medals he fought in the Second World War.
When I told her that he had promised them to

(14:42):
me before she had passed, she said, well, unless you
have it in writing, you will have nothing in this house. Anyway,
I already gave them to Clive. My heart sank. Clive,
not his real name, obviously, was her eldest son, and
the Dictionary definition of us grew up. He had been
in and out of prison for stealing and dealing. I

(15:03):
knew that the moment that Jerk got his hands on
my granddad's medals, they would be sold off. We looked
into taking her to court over the will, but everyone
we spoke to said that we probably wouldn't get anything
out of it. She immediately put the house up for
sale at close to seven hundred and fifty thousand pounds.
She had upset too many people in our town, so
she was going to sell the house and move closer

(15:24):
to her daughter, who lives in a big city. An
offer was made on the house, and she put down
a deposit on her house near the big city, and
I thought that was that here's where karma comes into play.
The people who wanted my NaN's house had a survey
done on the house to see if there were issues,
and Old Boy were there. Turns out that the land
the house was built on was way too soft for

(15:45):
the type of house it was, and it was sinking.
It has sunk about two centimeters in the forty plus
years my Nan and granddad had lived there, but the
sinking was accelerating to one centimeter per year. This meant
that within the next three years the house would need
some serious work or be knocked down the new value
of the house sixty thousand pounds. The buyers immediately pulled

(16:06):
out of the deal, having not even put down a deposit.
She couldn't buy her new house, but still had to
pay the deposit on it. And while this was happening,
she let Clive move in with her into her house
that she rented from the council. He wasn't allowed to
live in any of the council houses because he had
trashed every single one he had ever been given. Someone
reported this and she was kicked out of her home.

(16:27):
She was forced to move into my NaN's old home
as she couldn't live anywhere else. So there she is
living in a crumbling house with her jerk son and
her partner. She was stuck there for two years. Every
time I saw her, she would try and start talking
to me, and I would just ignore her and walk off.
One time, as I was walking away, she screamed, your
mother deserved what she got for having a little jerk

(16:48):
like you in the middle of a busy street. Someone
reported her to the police and she had an official
warning from them and was ridiculed on Facebook. Every time
I saw her after that, she looked more and more miserable. Eventually,
she sold the house for something like eighty five thousand
pounds and moved in with her daughter in the big city.
I lost contact with her and her kids after this.

(17:09):
I thought karma had been issued. Oh, but karma still
wasn't done with her yet. I bumped into one of
her former friends and she told me what happened. After
she left our town. She moved into her daughter's home
let's call her Sue. But they only had a three
bedroom house and three kids. My aunt and her partner
had to live in the smallest room of the house
while my aunt looked for a job and a home

(17:30):
to rent. Even with eighty five thousand pounds, she couldn't
afford a home anywhere. After about a month, my aunt's
partner ran off after emptying her account. She was left
stranded in Sue's house, not contributing anything because all the
money she makes goes into Bengal. Eventually, Sue and my
aunt get into a screaming match and my aunt said
something along the lines of I never should have had you.

(17:53):
Sue immediately kicked her out of the house. So there's
my aunt in a city where she knows nobody no money,
no home, and the last bridge she had a smoldering wreck.
Last anyone has heard, she was living in a caravan
in the roughest part of the city and she can
no longer work because she's suffering early onset arthritis and
can no longer move her hands. I know I shouldn't

(18:13):
get joy out of something like this happening to another person,
but it does bring me some peace as to what happened.
My son is a thief who stole from his girlfriend
and myself. For context, my son, Elijah is twenty three
and lives at home partially due to a physical disability.
He's currently taking classes online to earn a business degree.
He has been with his current and first time girlfriend, Tanya,

(18:36):
who's twenty four, for two years. Tanya is also in
college goes to a local brick and mortar. As I understand,
a few months ago, Tanya gave my son a brand
new Xbox Series X, which was a bit odd to me.
It's important to note, as Tanya's birthday approached, I gave
Eli two hundred dollars to put towards a decent gift
for her, since she had randomly gave him something expensive.

(18:59):
Fast forward few weeks, Tanya abruptly stopped coming over. They
are adults, so neither my wife or myself pressed him
as to why. Eventually, Tanya calls my wife to explain
that Eli is refusing to return her Xbox. She was
a bit confused. Tanya said they didn't break up, but
had a fight before she asked for the Xbox back.

(19:19):
She also claimed it was never a gift. We spoke
to Eli. He assured us it was absolutely a gift,
as it was even wrapped. I felt they needed to
figure things out on their own. Last weekend, Tanya came
over and approached me in our garage. My son and
wife weren home at the time. She had explained everything,
then handed me her phone to read their text history

(19:40):
to summarize. One of Tanya's three room mates stole from her.
Two days later, the Xbox she had purchased was delivered.
Fearing it would get stolen, she asked my son to
hold on to it for safe keeping until she found
a new place to live. As a direct quote, I
haven't even opened it yet. It just sucks that I'm
living with a thief. When I come over, let's set
it up at least so that you can use it.

(20:02):
He acknowledged everything she had said, aside from the entire
Xbox ordeal. The more I read, the more livid I
become the things my son said to her, speaking to
her in the way that he was. I was mortified.
This is not the sun I raised. I took her
into his room and packed up the Xbox. I was
in shock to learn about this side of my son
that I never even knew existed. I was asking questions

(20:24):
and learned the fight started after he forgot her birthday.
Days later. She was very hurt and confronted him. In return,
he tossed her a wrinkled up shirt that had a
ten dollars price tag on it. She did so much
for his birthday, helped his mom decorate and throw him
a party. They arrived home a few hours after she left.
He just stepped over the threshold, and I went off

(20:44):
on him. It's not like I can discipline him anymore,
but I darned sure wanted him to feel shame and
guilt for his appalling behavior. He kept saying that I
didn't understand she's only telling her side. When I informed
him the xbox was gone, he completely threw a five
year old tantrum. He called me names and said that
I had no business getting involved in his personal relationship.

(21:05):
His mother agreed with him and asked what happened to
them figuring things out on their own. Legally, she could
have just gotten the law involved. Three days later, he
put a key lock on his door. Am I the jerk?
Not the jerk. It would be different if he lived
in his own apartment, but he's under your roof. You
have one hundred percent the right to not want to
have some stolen xbox in your house. You gave it

(21:28):
back to the legal owner. You did nothing wrong, not
the jerk. If he took your two hundred dollars and
bought her a ten dollars T shirt, then he's clearly
capable of making up a story about it being a
birthday gift. She didn't just tell her side. She showed
you the texts, not the jerk. You did the right thing.
Your son attempted to steal from his girlfriend while living

(21:48):
under your roof. He is in no place to call
you names or throw a tantrum. She was rightfully upset.
Your son is in the wrong. Your wife is enabling
his behavior, which is something you two should communicate with
each other about ETA. If they are adults who can
figure it out on their own, then they should act
like it. Your son is acting like a kid, perhaps
he should be treated like one in this scenario. If

(22:10):
he can't act like an adult at the age of
twenty three, it may be necessary for you to get
involved so he can take some accountability for his actions
before it turns into a lawsuit. Am I the jerk
for bringing my baby to the hotel resort? My brother
was getting married in My brother was getting married and
it was a child free wedding per future sister in
law's request. The wedding was out of state, so my

(22:32):
husband and I were going to make it into a
three day weekend. We had a sitter lined up months ago.
The day before we were set to leave, she had
to cancel for a family emergency. We tried to find
a last minute sitter that we trusted and could also
do just overnight, but came up empty. I tried calling
and texting my brother about the situation, but I couldn't
get a hold of him. We were both in the

(22:53):
wedding party and I didn't want to leave my brother
and his soon to be wife in a bind. So
I called my mother after that, since I knew she
was with them. I explained the situation and she said
she had called me back after talking to him. Four
hours passed and we didn't hear back. We had to
make a decision, and since we're currently sharing one vehicle,
couldn't really leave my husband and kid without a vehicle,

(23:13):
and had put a lot of money already into the
wedding and trip, we just took our baby with us.
We got there later than we originally planned and just
went to our room. The next afternoon was the wedding
and my husband and I planned to swap time out.
I'd go to the ceremony and part of the reception
while he stayed with the baby, and he could attend
the second half of the reception while I stayed with

(23:33):
the baby. When the ceremony was over and we were
heading inside to the reception, my husband had the baby
inside of her stroller. I joined my husband and went
to say hello to some family members and went with
him to congratulate my brother and new sister in law.
Husband said his hellos and congrats, then went back to
our room with our kid. I left the reception area
a few times to bring my husband some small plates

(23:55):
of food so he didn't have to wait for his
turn to eat. On one of my trips back, my
brother's spoke with me about it being a child free
wedding and his wife was upset that my husband had
the baby and the lobby and that I kept leaving
the reception. I told him they can't be too upset
because we didn't bring the baby into the wedding area
or the reception. The rest of the time I was
at the reception, I kept getting comments from who I'm

(24:16):
guessing were sister in law's family and her bride'smaids about
how I was trying to steal her thunder by having
my baby there. Sister in law kept asking why I
didn't just leave them at home and would not accept
my reason for not doing so. It's been a sore
spot for my family and her all weekend. Am I
the jerk for bringing the baby with us? Info? The
wedding ceremony itself was outside in a courtyard. It was

(24:38):
not in a closed off area. We had to go
through the lobby area to get to the reception hall.
My husband was in the lobby walking with the baby
and getting coffee from the hotel shop. Not the jerk
excited to hear what magical solutions everyone had to offer.
You were in the wedding party, you had a solid
plan for everything. You showed up and did an amazing
job under those circumstances. Not the jerk. You and your

(25:02):
husband did all you could to respect the child free
wedding while also dealing with an unexpected sitter cancelation. You
tried to reach out to someone in advance of the
wedding and did everything you could to not have the
baby be the center of attention. The only piece that
maybe stands out is the left the reception area a
few times, but without knowing what kind of set up
there was or how you left. It doesn't change my opinion.

(25:24):
Everyone sucks here. I think where you messed up was
having your husband and baby greeting guests as they headed
to the reception. That comes across as attention seeking, and
I do think it violates the child free feeling. Yes,
other unrelated kids may have been in the hotel, but
they weren't going around greeting people, especially to go greet
the bride at her child free wedding. Overall, I think

(25:45):
you mostly did the best you could, but I would
not have taken the baby around. You're the jerk for
bringing the baby down to the lobby so guests interacted
with her on the way to the reception. It would
have been fine if you had maybe waited until the
whole wedding was over, but no, you brought the baby
down during the middle. That was rude. I assume your
husband knew the timing of the reception, so why was

(26:05):
he down there at that time? Well, what do you
think is OP the jerk or not? Please let us know.
Sister in law demands I sell her a Barbie baseball cap.
I have a baseball cap for my childhood that has
a Barbie logo on it. It's black with the name
Barbie and pink with a fancy fond My son loves it.
He's only three and doesn't know what it says. He

(26:27):
only likes it because we were looking through the basement
in my parents' house and came across the hat and
a photo of me wearing it when I was younger.
He got super excited when he saw the picture and
has been in love with the hat ever since. He
calls it the Mama hat. Everyone thinks it's cute. We
were having dinner with my sister in law and her family.
My sister in law has an eight year old daughter
who I love. She really likes Barbie and everything she

(26:50):
owns is Barbie themed. I had a feeling that maybe
it wouldn't be best for my son to wear the
Barbie hat while we were there, but he really wanted
to show his uncle aka his best buddy, and my
husband said it shouldn't be a big deal, so I
allowed it. The night went pretty well, but I noticed
my sister in law was a little quiet. Right before
we left. She pulled me aside and asked if I

(27:10):
could do her a big favor. She asked if I
could sell her the Barbie hat. I asked her why
she wanted the hat, and she said that her daughter's
been eyeing it all night and asked for one. I
told her to just buy one online or something, but
she said that she feels like that would be a waste.
I said I was sorry, but I wasn't giving her
the hat. She argued that my son is a boy,
and once he realizes it's Barbie themed, he'll throw it away.

(27:34):
I explained to her that she can ask for it
again when the time comes, and I'll think about it.
I thought that was it, but she went to my
son directly and started telling him how Barbie is for
girls and that the hat is Barbie. He got upset
because to him, it's not a Barbie hat, it's a
Mama hat. I was over it, though, and I told
her that she definitely wasn't getting it ever now that

(27:54):
if he decides he doesn't want it anymore, it's going
straight to the garbage or my mom's basement again. She
got all frustrated and said, I'm being absolutely ridiculous. She
accused me of being a childish jerk and said that
I just broke her daughter's heart. Am I the jerk?
I'm starting to feel a little bad. I think I
might be doing a little too much over a silly
old hat. Trying to make a three year old ashamed

(28:17):
of his favorite hat is really crumbing behavior for an adult.
Don't reward it, not the jerk. Am I the jerk
for not splitting my daughter's college fund. I'm forty two
female and my daughter is seventeen. When she was seven,
we lost her father to an avoidable accident. Due to
that and the subsequent settlement, my daughter was able to
have a trust fund of sorts that provided for college,

(28:39):
grad school if she wanted, and even some left over
for whatever life might bring. It is money that managed
wisely would enable her to have a head start in life.
She knows about this and has never taken for granted
given where the money came from. After all, we had
both rather have her father around than the money. That said.
Life moves on and I remarried six years after my

(29:00):
ormer husband's passing, to a lovely man who has two
kids of his own who are seventeen and thirteen. All
of the kids live with us, primarily with his kids
seeing their mother on vacations as she lives across the country.
This year, both our girls are graduating and should be
heading to college. My daughter was admitted ed to her
dream school last year and is ecstatic about it. Her

(29:21):
father is an alumnus and she has this old sweatshirt
of his that she kept to remind her of him.
She cried so much when she got in, and both
her stepfather and I were proud of her because she
worked hard to get in. My stepdaughter will also be
attending a wonderful school that is one of the top
ranked schools for her interests. The problem now arises with
the money to pay for stepdaughter's school. Because her parents

(29:43):
cannot afford to pay the tuition in its entirety, stepdaughter
will have to take some loans. All told, she will
graduate with about forty thousand dollars in loans, which I
think is still quite modest for the school she's attending
and her earning prospects postgraduation. But my daughter will graduate
debt free, and for my husband this is suddenly a problem.
He wants us to split up my daughter's fund between

(30:05):
all three kids, because then they could all probably have
college fully paid for. My daughter won't have much left
over and will definitely need to borrow for grad school,
which she has expressed interest in attending. But according to
my husband, that's okay because everyone will start off on
equal footing post college. I think this is unfair to
my daughter because one her father had to pass for

(30:27):
this money, and two this is like her inheritance from him.
My husband thinks that they are all siblings and should
be happy to share the money with them if it
means giving her siblings a head start in life. I
absolutely do not want to put her in the position
of being guilted into saying yes if she doesn't want to.
I have expressed all of this to my husband, and
he thinks that I'm being selfish, that I'm teaching my

(30:47):
daughter to be selfish, and I obviously don't consider my
step kids the same as my daughter. Am I the
jerk for wanting to protect my daughter's trust for her
as it was intended eta since I've seen this a
few times already. Both kids do have college funds, but
somewhat smaller because my husband and his ex got their
finances together later in life, so there is some money.
But with the caliber of the school that stepdaughter will

(31:09):
be attending, she will still need some loans to cover costs.
I haven't brought up going to a cheaper school because
that will be a fresh set of problems given where
my daughter will be going. Not the jerk. That settlement
was for your deceased husband's kids, not your future kids,
and certainly not someone else's. I agree, Not the jerk.
The money is for your deceased husband's kids, not your

(31:31):
current husband's kids. Keep your stance. This is your daughter's
money from her father. The other kids have money from
their father to me, your current husband is the jerk
for even suggesting it. Well, who do you think is
the jerk, OPI or her husband? Please let us know.
When will the new step parents stop trying to steal
the kid's college funds the world may never know. Support

(31:54):
our channel by joining as a member today and we'll
give you a shout out in our next video. Or
come on watch this video next. You won't believe what
Karen does in that one.

All Episodes

Wife's Obsession with Cleanliness Drives Husband Crazy! - Reddit Stories

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

The Breakfast Club

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Wife's Obsession with Cleanliness Drives Husband Crazy! - Reddit Stories