November 26, 2025 • 28 mins
The Burns & Allen Show was a popular old time radio program that featured George Burrns and Gracie Allen as well as a variety of recurring characters, including Bill Goodwin and legendary voice actor Mel Blanc.
This Thanksgiving episode features George Burns asking Gracie Allen to stop spending money on frivolous things and instead buy war bonds.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/retro-rewind--6803060/support.
This Thanksgiving episode features George Burns asking Gracie Allen to stop spending money on frivolous things and instead buy war bonds.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/retro-rewind--6803060/support.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
From Hollywood, The George Burns and Gracie Allen Joe for
Ham Allen's Farm.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Crazy People, Spam, River Boom Spam, George Burns, Gracie Allen.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Or shall these orchestra singingly with the school history?
Speaker 4 (00:32):
Least for not Lison?
Speaker 5 (00:33):
Who is the he sen?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Now here's a quiz question, friends, and we'll pay you
to know the answer.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
Ready for the question? All right? What is an easy
way to serve the family a swell.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Main course for dinner that costs but a few cents?
There's no magic about it. Just open a can of
spam spam and bake according to the simple directions on
the label. Takes only a jiffy and you'll set before
the family a delicious taste surprise that satisfies even the
huskiest appetite. That's because spam is grand tasting meat, and
baked it certainly makes a hit. The perfect combination of
(01:36):
juicy pork shoulder and ham meat originated by Hormel gives
spam extra flavor, extra goodness. Try a spam bake for
dinner tomorrow. Just be sure you ask your food dealer
for spam spam. Here they are the stars of our
(02:03):
big Happy's family.
Speaker 6 (02:04):
George and Gracie, thank you very very much tonight, ladies
and Geir George, word's Gracie.
Speaker 7 (02:17):
She's not here tonight, ladies and get George. Can you
do a show without Gracy?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Certainly? I can do a show without her. Do you
think I need Gracie? Certainly? But he needs Gracy about
as much as Dorothy Lemore needs us. Wrong?
Speaker 7 (02:31):
Oh yeah, well like unlesson I happen to have a
lot of talent, and well I'll answer you later.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Helloy speaking, Gracie, where are you? We're doing a broadcast
and you're supposed to be here.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
I couldn't get down and count my granddaddy very sick.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
He was on the floor all are he was on
the floor. What about the bed?
Speaker 5 (02:52):
Well, we couldn't you that we had a comser off?
Now where could we put the hawk from com.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Well, Gracie, where's your granddaddy? Now?
Speaker 5 (03:03):
He's gone in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
With he has the temperature of one hundred and five?
Why do you got him in the kitchens?
Speaker 5 (03:11):
From the out.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Your your granddaddy's in the fridgidair? Why don't you play
here please?
Speaker 5 (03:21):
Is not possible? Every hour he does knocked.
Speaker 7 (03:29):
Look, Gracie, we're doing a broadcast.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Well, never mind, there's a smart idea. Putting a man
with a temperature a fridge of their I opposed to
quere him and put a nice pack on his head
and a hot water bottle on his feet.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
For George, all they need to use is the can
of spam. Can of spam, sure colder, hot, and it's
a spot. Oh yes, but you're a regular doctor killed there.
Speaker 7 (03:53):
Look, everybody, Not that I need Gracie, but I think
we want to go over to Gracie's house and do
the broadcast.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Make an old man happy. Well, if it's gonna make
you happy, George, let's go. Oh quiet, I want.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
To for him.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
As I said, your thing was getting York again with yes,
guitar player, I know what is that, sauel a. Why
don't you drive down in my car? I just got
a brand new rooster, A rooster he's in.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
You're a car made by general mothers. And it's not
general mothers, it's general motors. A mother is well, for example,
when you were a baby, who combed your hair.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
That's what I'd like to know. The cart isn't straight? Well, quiet, come.
Speaker 7 (04:39):
On, everybody, We gotta get the Gracie's house. Oh, well,
here we are at Gracie's house. I'll ring the doorbell.
Speaker 5 (04:52):
Judge, you didn't knock on the door. The bell doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Well, this is a house, all right, How.
Speaker 5 (05:00):
Josh, when'd you get here?
Speaker 3 (05:02):
I give up? Hello everybody, Gracie, do you know that
you're not all there? Hang on?
Speaker 5 (05:08):
That's how my counsel's removed.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
Tonsils removed? That annoys me.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
That's that's all I've got, say, Gracie, what's the matter
with your granddaddy?
Speaker 8 (05:22):
Oh, he doesn't take care of himself. Inhaled the guys, Well,
what's wrong with well most people? Just inhale the smoke.
Speaker 7 (05:31):
Look, Gracie, you'll have to excuse me if I run
away just before the broadcast is over. You see, I've
got a date for a little redhead and she won't
wait a redhead?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Say, pupsy, how do you get all these gals? Well?
Why shouldn't he?
Speaker 9 (05:42):
George is a good dancer, he's a swell dresser, he's romantic,
spends lots of money. Continue on next page, Anie, don't
read that part.
Speaker 8 (05:51):
All I everybody?
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Largely? What is this you've got bob wire on the banisters.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
Well, you know my Dranddaddy has to.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Slide in the Oh, I see him that stops.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
So it doesn't stop him, but it's flows him down
a bit.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
I think I know what your name it is? It
is it is? It isn't it? Will it isn't it? Who?
Who are they?
Speaker 5 (06:21):
Oh? They've been living here for every years?
Speaker 3 (06:23):
Well who are they?
Speaker 5 (06:24):
I don't know?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Racy, you know this house is filled with imbeciles.
Speaker 5 (06:29):
Well, I better tell Dan that you all here.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Well, never mind that, we better start the broadcast.
Speaker 5 (06:36):
What's the night's program about you?
Speaker 3 (06:38):
It's about Thanksgiving?
Speaker 7 (06:39):
What's that?
Speaker 3 (06:41):
What's that? Look?
Speaker 7 (06:42):
Gracie, as far back as you can remember, what always
happened in in.
Speaker 5 (06:46):
November Rooseve was elected.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Well, I'll try to explain it here, all right. You see,
in sixteen.
Speaker 7 (06:59):
Twenty the first Americans arrived in the New Land to
make a fresh start. They decided to build homes, and
do you know one of the first things they.
Speaker 8 (07:07):
Did they applied for FAJ loans.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
FAJ loans didn't come until three hundred years later.
Speaker 8 (07:15):
Well, you've got to go through a lot of red
tape before you get the money.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
Anyway, these people, These people were called puritans, but that
what's that? Did you ever read of those people who
suffered and were punished in stocks?
Speaker 4 (07:29):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (07:29):
In nineteen twenty ninth of about death friends with Puitans.
Speaker 7 (07:35):
Well, anyway, these people were so grateful for finding your
freedom in a new country that they killed a turkey
and called a thanksgiving.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Oh what a judday for a turkey.
Speaker 7 (07:45):
And the custom still remains even today. We chop the
heads off turkeys.
Speaker 5 (07:48):
How can you knock off all that heads of run?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
A turkey only has one head?
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Then where do will the necks come from? Last year?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Message?
Speaker 5 (07:57):
You got a neck? I'm glad I got a neck.
My uncle got a neck.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Oh this is the end, and that prop me Danny.
Speaker 7 (08:10):
Look smoothies bad Charlie a little when you sing a
song While I try to explain to Gracie what thanksgivin is?
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Please, I think Honky Donky village in Texas. There's a
guy who plays the Vestpiana.
Speaker 10 (08:25):
My father play Piana anywhere that who's like.
Speaker 11 (08:28):
Gets stary, likes the best das no us pay play
just about.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
He's daddy of the ball.
Speaker 11 (08:36):
The people gather around when he gets on stand and
wney plays, he gets a hand.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
There's the movies bots, the captin the dance.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
No honey, there wodance the way dans were the.
Speaker 11 (08:47):
Basic us there holler, heasy, Daddy capes.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
The bar clink pink pink, flank, plink plank.
Speaker 11 (08:54):
Plucking out the keys, redon, I would ea for any
dancer is a basic as I'm there, hollow.
Speaker 10 (09:05):
Spaty daddy king of b Jeff bb.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Please be me.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Ball me.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
Said, ecuse me, the paying case in the bar, so you'll.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Give us pep fogus on us.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
He's the honkey honkey style without him said, you see.
Speaker 11 (09:25):
Am a man now beat beat the daddy aging the ball,
oh rock.
Speaker 10 (09:31):
And every while all ride.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
And we don't track with the who.
Speaker 10 (09:40):
I've seen servis the boll and off kicking.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
The boogie woogie, telling him right again.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
All right, the talmon me and I got to second.
Speaker 10 (09:54):
People all lie now, haven't everybody about in the thousand
after the sun has a well there, We're.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Gonna leave it to you.
Speaker 11 (10:02):
Who meet me, daddy, daddy, bet me, hey do the.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Graccie.
Speaker 7 (10:19):
I've never seen a house like this, people walking around
and nobody knowing them, and this furniture.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
What kind of furniture is this?
Speaker 5 (10:25):
Well, it comes from the Hollywood Furniture Company.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, but what about the period?
Speaker 5 (10:30):
It comes from the Hollywood Financier Company period.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, that's what I meant. Oh say, Gracie, where's your kitchen?
I want to get a stam work.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
Oh but we haven't got any Sam in the FIDGETI.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
No, who's spam in the frigid air?
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Sam doesn't eat any refrigeration.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Oh sh I forgot. I'll hate myself in the morning.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Oh oh, oh, what's there?
Speaker 5 (11:00):
That's my granddaddy. He's flying down the banister.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
He's sliding down a bob wire banish.
Speaker 5 (11:09):
So he goes it twenty times a day, and the
doctor told him to stop.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
Well, I imagine he would.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Sure dad was hot.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Well, I hope the kid makes a three point laming.
It is it isn't it is? It isn't it? It
isn't way. See, these fellows have been living in your
house for over a year. You don't know who they are.
Speaker 4 (11:33):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
Why don't you ask them?
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I don't talk to strangers. Well, this is somehow sure,
I'd better go and find grand daddy and give him
his medicine. You see, he hasn't got a nurse anymore.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Oh he had a nurse, yes, And the only.
Speaker 8 (11:46):
Way he take his medicine was when the nurse would
kiss him after every tea spoon fro.
Speaker 5 (11:51):
It was awful, stop.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Bitter, No, we have many teeths.
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Well, let's get this over with all right, Let's find
your granddaddy and give them us medicine.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
Boy, want a house? I've never seen?
Speaker 7 (12:08):
Hey, sal many four years in Harvard? Why are you
sitting out in the hall? Won't buy yourself soaking?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
A big Harvard Yale game this year? And I won't
be there. Why don't you go?
Speaker 12 (12:17):
Not after the sad experience I had last year? There,
I was at the stadium. It was the last quarter
of the score was nothing to nothing. Just as Yale
was making a touchdown, somebody stuck a gun in my
back and held me up.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Well, there were millions of people. Then why didn't she yell?
What didn't have them think I was rooting for Yale? Oh?
Speaker 9 (12:38):
Come on, Gracie, Oh George, George, when you meet this
little redheaded girls and I, why don't you take it
of the follies, Bazier.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
It's a swallow show. All those Gary shows are all.
Speaker 7 (12:45):
The same, Hony, take away their feathers and their little
umbrellas and what have you got?
Speaker 3 (12:50):
High blood pressure? All quiet?
Speaker 5 (12:54):
Well are you granddaddy?
Speaker 3 (12:56):
Well, look, Gracie before we all go in, what's the
matter with your granddady? No?
Speaker 8 (13:00):
In the middle of the nightbeihood it strange, Nises, and
we ran into Granddaddy's room and.
Speaker 5 (13:04):
There he was shaking all over.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
He was shaking home. Yeah, well, what did you do?
What did we do?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
He sent for a doctor.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
What did the doctor do? Oh?
Speaker 5 (13:12):
You took the Madameazga record after the troll. We all
we got to keep again.
Speaker 7 (13:17):
Kid has probably got rumatism. I agree, Well, what's the
matter of Grandpa? Don't you feel well?
Speaker 4 (13:27):
No, George, you boy?
Speaker 3 (13:31):
Hey, hand me that picture headed along a sleeping tablet Oh,
I can't find Handy Lama's picture. Do you want that?
Do you want this one of Van Shrton? No, I'm
saving her until I feel better. Yeah, well, white Grandpa'll
look in this closet. It is it isn't it isn't.
(13:51):
I can't see ray she can't. Somebody else in your
family get him the medicine. I've got to take with
a little redhead.
Speaker 5 (13:57):
Well, my mother's got a stone closet.
Speaker 6 (13:59):
My guy went downtown the vat and Eddie went downtown
the boat yet and my body.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Election was over two weeks ago. Rung now.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
But my daddy's a Republican and he never gives up.
Speaker 4 (14:15):
Side.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Understand this.
Speaker 7 (14:16):
I try to date you the girl sing your verse,
look out, don't get excited, you'll break up, love Weason.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Don't worry about me. And besides, you said that wrong.
Put it on on me and don't get excited. You'll
break up, blood Weason. Well that's much better.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Hey, buddy boy, what is it granddaddy?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Buddy boy, would you mind reaching him that code pocket
and getting me a cigar? What code Grandpa?
Speaker 4 (14:43):
The one George is wearing.
Speaker 3 (14:47):
There aren't any cigars in my pocket. You mean you
didn't get anything with that suit? That was a pretty
good one, Carnie, Oh quiet. Even if I did have
a cigar, if I did get a sig with it,
why should I give it to you. You're the tightest
old name I ever met. You never gave anybody anything.
Speaker 8 (15:05):
Ill judge, you shouldn't say that my granddaddy when he's
so sick he gave you something?
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Won Did he ever give me something tonight? Wan? Did
he give me amazomzo?
Speaker 10 (15:18):
Our heart?
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Any boys will give a sugar?
Speaker 4 (16:51):
Bay is Bay?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
I know her, I know that, Braceley. But if you
had granddaddy had the measles, he he shouldn't have kept
the secret.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
He didn't. He's been staying all around.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
Why do they ever go into this crazy? How Graci?
What's what's that she's up in?
Speaker 9 (18:34):
Yet?
Speaker 3 (18:34):
Who's backing my dad? Your grandmother? Bracy?
Speaker 7 (18:38):
When you tell your grandmother to stop, we can't continue
talking if she's gonna make all that noise uffairs.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
But this is the craziest house. Listen to that beat
beat beat beat beat beat Meat, Eat eat meat.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
I say, there, lady, when the shopping you go, here's
some news that you should know. Help me out, George,
I have on this far.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I'll beat it out. B A two of the bar.
Spam is the meat that you should buy. Spam is different.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And here is why we use four shoulder to make
spam sweet and the ham it takes for extra good
meat and the extra good.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Flavor that you get it. Spams got there, folks, of
course we added ham.
Speaker 8 (19:19):
Harm else dot it this new kind of meat season
get denonated fan to.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Eat, I say, senor burnser spam for lynch. This delicious
meat is good to crnch. What seniority. It's crunch, not
crunch crench crench crunch crunch.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
You buy it all the time if you try it lunch.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
To get the real thing to put on your table,
look for this sentence on the spam can label park show.
Speaker 8 (19:43):
The meat with hand me down fruit. The dam is
really different my my mind, that doesn't fit.
Speaker 3 (19:51):
Yeah, that's right, Graysie, that's the worst one.
Speaker 5 (19:53):
Yet nothing is just like sam my fans.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
And so with this our poem hands when the shopping
you go tomorrow, ma'am ask.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
For sp am spam.
Speaker 11 (20:07):
Sly said, Die said, right, they just called scams.
Speaker 9 (20:24):
Look, Jorge, if there's a possibility if you're having the measles,
I wouldn't keep that date with that redhead.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
Well, don't worry about me, Audie. I'm going out right
now and get myself inoculated.
Speaker 5 (20:32):
Why do it tonight? Got to bring the new year'
z e.
Speaker 7 (20:38):
Luck, Gracie. Inoculation prevents sickness. You see, meetings of germs
can live on the head of a pin.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
How can we eat that? They use a knife, and
for ah, I'm going to get out of this house
before it's too late. Hold on there, mister, ready to
think you're going from going out off? So why oh no,
you're not.
Speaker 4 (21:00):
Nobody leaves this house.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
It's quarantine. I'm George Burns. I haven't got anything. I've
heard you in the air, brother, and you ain't kidding.
Got me tell you? Well, that says a fine thing.
Speaker 10 (21:18):
And I've got my shoo with your hallo johgey, you're
back from your date already?
Speaker 5 (21:22):
Did you meet that down?
Speaker 3 (21:23):
You can't say, Gracy, I will stopped by a cop.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
Oh that's what always happened in those podcas.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
I knew you can understand me once.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
I was in the park College, the freshest dying and
not what.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
He said to me. Will you be reasonable?
Speaker 5 (21:38):
That's what he said to me.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I'll stop, That's what I said to him, Racy. I
didn't even get out of the door. There's a cop outside.
He says your house is quarantine.
Speaker 5 (21:50):
He's crazy's duck o.
Speaker 7 (21:53):
Well, never mind, I'll see you later. I've got to
keep this date. I don't know where this doll is
doing for the wrong dog.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
Isn't that silly? The broom closet.
Speaker 10 (22:09):
Oh, look at the halloa, Josh, when did you get back?
Speaker 5 (22:12):
Did you have a knife?
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Phone head, Gracie, I was in the broom closet.
Speaker 5 (22:17):
A husband came home.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
But I'm trying to get out of this house of yours.
Speaker 5 (22:23):
Well, I've got an idea.
Speaker 8 (22:24):
Let's do what they do in the movies. Now, I'll
tie is dead sheet around you, and let's shaut.
Speaker 5 (22:29):
Of the window.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
That's not a bad idea.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
Hit the wrong then I'll tie this end of the bed. Ah, already,
jee climb out of the window.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Oh here I go, poach Graycy. Gracie, what part of
the beck that you tire?
Speaker 11 (22:46):
To you?
Speaker 3 (22:51):
I got to the place with Parantine. They'll get back
in that house?
Speaker 5 (22:56):
Well, look at the halloa?
Speaker 10 (22:57):
Joy, are you back from s good already? To have
a nighttown to.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
The red ward? See I was I almost killed myself.
I just went through that window.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
Oh her husband came home again?
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Huh. You know you could use another rounds of brains.
Speaker 7 (23:12):
Not me.
Speaker 5 (23:12):
I'm overweight now.
Speaker 7 (23:15):
No matter where I go, that Coppers there, I wish
he'd stick to his beat. Sick of his what beet
fe me me.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Spam is the meat that you should eat them?
Speaker 7 (23:25):
I know that.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
I don't. You should try, I know that. But we've
got it before. This poetry is going from bad to verse.
Oh it's just a little slip. Look at me. I'm frothy.
How can I get washed up? Just keep on telling
those jokes, brother, Gracie. Where's the washroom right down the hall?
Speaker 5 (23:46):
He can't miss it. It's the one with the gasoline pumping.
Sound of it?
Speaker 3 (23:51):
Gasoline pump.
Speaker 5 (23:52):
Sure, my grandmother is a tourist and we like to
make her feel at home.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Well, I'll go in there and get means up.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
It is it is, it is, it is, it is.
Speaker 3 (24:04):
Wait a minute, all you guys have been doing is arguing.
What are you arguing about? I claim this Thursday is
the real Thanksgiving, and Joe says it is. Well, it is,
it is, it is. It makes hell, Gracie, I've got
to get out of here.
Speaker 8 (24:19):
Well, judge, why why don't you go up in the
roof and fly down the drain piece and then when
you get to the yacht.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
The drain and when you get to the yacht the
drain peep.
Speaker 5 (24:30):
Oh, pardon me, I was a sellie last night.
Speaker 7 (24:36):
If I'm going out with him and you won't be
able to speak English, did you send your burns when
you say that?
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Smile? Smile?
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (24:46):
S n e l L smile that smell? You're perfect? Oh?
Speaker 7 (24:59):
Please, everything happens to me here. I've got a date
with a girl. I'm all messed up. I scraped my nose.
Huh what a pickle looks more like a banana? Oh yeah, well,
my face happens to be all right. Doesn't bother me?
Speaker 5 (25:13):
Maybe that's the kind of you're standing behind it?
Speaker 3 (25:16):
Yeah? Maybe, Well, I just gotta get out of here. Mister,
why does that sound? Man?
Speaker 12 (25:20):
Just look at this goldfish bowl. It's a rhapsody and glass.
It's made of pure quartz, silicate.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
Time like this. You gotta impress me with his education.
There must be some way out.
Speaker 5 (25:29):
The man, what happened to the goldfish to win that goal?
Speaker 3 (25:33):
Ask me?
Speaker 5 (25:33):
What did you do with the goldfish?
Speaker 3 (25:35):
Forgive me, miss Ellen, and I couldn't help it. Once
a Harvard man, always a Harvard man. Oh that must
be some way out.
Speaker 5 (25:43):
No, I don't mind you're eating the goldfish. But Tom
Harmon is gonna get pretty angry.
Speaker 3 (25:48):
Why Tom Harmon is that great Michigan football player.
Speaker 5 (25:51):
Well it's talk of the name of our cat.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
You call your cat Tom Harmon.
Speaker 8 (25:55):
Well, yeah, that's an account of every time they gets
Lucy makes ten yards.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
Hey wait a minute, why did I think of this before? Cracie?
Where's the chimney right there? Well, goodbye everybody there, we
got the chimney A bok for a woman. Well here
it is about. There's the blue sky, blue sky. Enough
and that's my uniparm. See get back in there.
Speaker 10 (26:26):
Oh, look at the hall jockey.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
Bye?
Speaker 7 (26:37):
Why?
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Why?
Speaker 7 (26:39):
Why?
Speaker 1 (26:59):
Where's the one person in every family listening tonight? Do
is just one more small favor? All we want to
ask is that you remind mother to get a can
of spam when she goes shopping tomorrow. You'll be doing
a bigger favor for yourself because spam is absolutely the
most popular new meat item in a generation. Once you
taste spam's tempting flavor, it's tender, meaty goodness. You want
to serve spam often. Spam is so easy to prepare.
(27:22):
Try it tomorrow. Use the simple recipes on the label.
Ask your food dealer for s P A M.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Spam. Join the thousands who.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Say, whenever the occasion calls for delicious meat at our house,
we serve spam.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
Oh but I'm certainly in a fine message.
Speaker 5 (27:36):
Oh John, I get my brand. Daddy hasn't got the meat.
Speaker 3 (27:40):
Good, No, I can go with me.
Speaker 5 (27:41):
Oh yeah, then you can say hard on a brand day.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
He went to good night All.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Join us again next week, same time, same station for
another Burns and Alan show with Ardie Shawn, his orchestra
and the Smoothies. Until then, this is what Easton, reminding
you to remember that cold ormhont spam hits the spot.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
Have you tried Hormale Chili caen Carney?
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Even those who think they don't like chili do like
chili con Carney the way Hormale makes it, because it's
different and everybody likes it.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Double your money back if.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
You don't like it, Try Hormale Chili Caen Carney tomorrow.
This is the National Broadcasting Company
From Hollywood, The George Burns and Gracie Allen Joe for
Ham Allen's Farm.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Crazy People, Spam, River Boom Spam, George Burns, Gracie Allen.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Or shall these orchestra singingly with the school history?
Speaker 4 (00:32):
Least for not Lison?
Speaker 5 (00:33):
Who is the he sen?
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Now here's a quiz question, friends, and we'll pay you
to know the answer.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
Ready for the question? All right? What is an easy
way to serve the family a swell.
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Main course for dinner that costs but a few cents?
There's no magic about it. Just open a can of
spam spam and bake according to the simple directions on
the label. Takes only a jiffy and you'll set before
the family a delicious taste surprise that satisfies even the
huskiest appetite. That's because spam is grand tasting meat, and
baked it certainly makes a hit. The perfect combination of
(01:36):
juicy pork shoulder and ham meat originated by Hormel gives
spam extra flavor, extra goodness. Try a spam bake for
dinner tomorrow. Just be sure you ask your food dealer
for spam spam. Here they are the stars of our
(02:03):
big Happy's family.
Speaker 6 (02:04):
George and Gracie, thank you very very much tonight, ladies
and Geir George, word's Gracie.
Speaker 7 (02:17):
She's not here tonight, ladies and get George. Can you
do a show without Gracy?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Certainly? I can do a show without her. Do you
think I need Gracie? Certainly? But he needs Gracy about
as much as Dorothy Lemore needs us. Wrong?
Speaker 7 (02:31):
Oh yeah, well like unlesson I happen to have a
lot of talent, and well I'll answer you later.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Helloy speaking, Gracie, where are you? We're doing a broadcast
and you're supposed to be here.
Speaker 5 (02:43):
I couldn't get down and count my granddaddy very sick.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
He was on the floor all are he was on
the floor. What about the bed?
Speaker 5 (02:52):
Well, we couldn't you that we had a comser off?
Now where could we put the hawk from com.
Speaker 3 (02:59):
Well, Gracie, where's your granddaddy? Now?
Speaker 5 (03:03):
He's gone in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
With he has the temperature of one hundred and five?
Why do you got him in the kitchens?
Speaker 5 (03:11):
From the out.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
Your your granddaddy's in the fridgidair? Why don't you play
here please?
Speaker 5 (03:21):
Is not possible? Every hour he does knocked.
Speaker 7 (03:29):
Look, Gracie, we're doing a broadcast.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Well, never mind, there's a smart idea. Putting a man
with a temperature a fridge of their I opposed to
quere him and put a nice pack on his head
and a hot water bottle on his feet.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
For George, all they need to use is the can
of spam. Can of spam, sure colder, hot, and it's
a spot. Oh yes, but you're a regular doctor killed there.
Speaker 7 (03:53):
Look, everybody, Not that I need Gracie, but I think
we want to go over to Gracie's house and do
the broadcast.
Speaker 3 (04:00):
Make an old man happy. Well, if it's gonna make
you happy, George, let's go. Oh quiet, I want.
Speaker 5 (04:08):
To for him.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
As I said, your thing was getting York again with yes,
guitar player, I know what is that, sauel a. Why
don't you drive down in my car? I just got
a brand new rooster, A rooster he's in.
Speaker 7 (04:21):
You're a car made by general mothers. And it's not
general mothers, it's general motors. A mother is well, for example,
when you were a baby, who combed your hair.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
That's what I'd like to know. The cart isn't straight? Well, quiet, come.
Speaker 7 (04:39):
On, everybody, We gotta get the Gracie's house. Oh, well,
here we are at Gracie's house. I'll ring the doorbell.
Speaker 5 (04:52):
Judge, you didn't knock on the door. The bell doesn't work.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Well, this is a house, all right, How.
Speaker 5 (05:00):
Josh, when'd you get here?
Speaker 3 (05:02):
I give up? Hello everybody, Gracie, do you know that
you're not all there? Hang on?
Speaker 5 (05:08):
That's how my counsel's removed.
Speaker 3 (05:11):
Tonsils removed? That annoys me.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
That's that's all I've got, say, Gracie, what's the matter
with your granddaddy?
Speaker 8 (05:22):
Oh, he doesn't take care of himself. Inhaled the guys, Well,
what's wrong with well most people? Just inhale the smoke.
Speaker 7 (05:31):
Look, Gracie, you'll have to excuse me if I run
away just before the broadcast is over. You see, I've
got a date for a little redhead and she won't
wait a redhead?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Say, pupsy, how do you get all these gals? Well?
Why shouldn't he?
Speaker 9 (05:42):
George is a good dancer, he's a swell dresser, he's romantic,
spends lots of money. Continue on next page, Anie, don't
read that part.
Speaker 8 (05:51):
All I everybody?
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Largely? What is this you've got bob wire on the banisters.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
Well, you know my Dranddaddy has to.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Slide in the Oh, I see him that stops.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
So it doesn't stop him, but it's flows him down
a bit.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
I think I know what your name it is? It
is it is? It isn't it? Will it isn't it? Who?
Who are they?
Speaker 5 (06:21):
Oh? They've been living here for every years?
Speaker 3 (06:23):
Well who are they?
Speaker 5 (06:24):
I don't know?
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Racy, you know this house is filled with imbeciles.
Speaker 5 (06:29):
Well, I better tell Dan that you all here.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
Well, never mind that, we better start the broadcast.
Speaker 5 (06:36):
What's the night's program about you?
Speaker 3 (06:38):
It's about Thanksgiving?
Speaker 7 (06:39):
What's that?
Speaker 3 (06:41):
What's that? Look?
Speaker 7 (06:42):
Gracie, as far back as you can remember, what always
happened in in.
Speaker 5 (06:46):
November Rooseve was elected.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Well, I'll try to explain it here, all right. You see,
in sixteen.
Speaker 7 (06:59):
Twenty the first Americans arrived in the New Land to
make a fresh start. They decided to build homes, and
do you know one of the first things they.
Speaker 8 (07:07):
Did they applied for FAJ loans.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
FAJ loans didn't come until three hundred years later.
Speaker 8 (07:15):
Well, you've got to go through a lot of red
tape before you get the money.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
Anyway, these people, These people were called puritans, but that
what's that? Did you ever read of those people who
suffered and were punished in stocks?
Speaker 4 (07:29):
Oh?
Speaker 8 (07:29):
In nineteen twenty ninth of about death friends with Puitans.
Speaker 7 (07:35):
Well, anyway, these people were so grateful for finding your
freedom in a new country that they killed a turkey
and called a thanksgiving.
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Oh what a judday for a turkey.
Speaker 7 (07:45):
And the custom still remains even today. We chop the
heads off turkeys.
Speaker 5 (07:48):
How can you knock off all that heads of run?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
A turkey only has one head?
Speaker 5 (07:53):
Then where do will the necks come from? Last year?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
Message?
Speaker 5 (07:57):
You got a neck? I'm glad I got a neck.
My uncle got a neck.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
Oh this is the end, and that prop me Danny.
Speaker 7 (08:10):
Look smoothies bad Charlie a little when you sing a
song While I try to explain to Gracie what thanksgivin is?
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Please, I think Honky Donky village in Texas. There's a
guy who plays the Vestpiana.
Speaker 10 (08:25):
My father play Piana anywhere that who's like.
Speaker 11 (08:28):
Gets stary, likes the best das no us pay play
just about.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
He's daddy of the ball.
Speaker 11 (08:36):
The people gather around when he gets on stand and
wney plays, he gets a hand.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
There's the movies bots, the captin the dance.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
No honey, there wodance the way dans were the.
Speaker 11 (08:47):
Basic us there holler, heasy, Daddy capes.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
The bar clink pink pink, flank, plink plank.
Speaker 11 (08:54):
Plucking out the keys, redon, I would ea for any
dancer is a basic as I'm there, hollow.
Speaker 10 (09:05):
Spaty daddy king of b Jeff bb.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Please be me.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
Ball me.
Speaker 4 (09:16):
Said, ecuse me, the paying case in the bar, so you'll.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Give us pep fogus on us.
Speaker 4 (09:22):
He's the honkey honkey style without him said, you see.
Speaker 11 (09:25):
Am a man now beat beat the daddy aging the ball,
oh rock.
Speaker 10 (09:31):
And every while all ride.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
And we don't track with the who.
Speaker 10 (09:40):
I've seen servis the boll and off kicking.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
The boogie woogie, telling him right again.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
All right, the talmon me and I got to second.
Speaker 10 (09:54):
People all lie now, haven't everybody about in the thousand
after the sun has a well there, We're.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
Gonna leave it to you.
Speaker 11 (10:02):
Who meet me, daddy, daddy, bet me, hey do the.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Graccie.
Speaker 7 (10:19):
I've never seen a house like this, people walking around
and nobody knowing them, and this furniture.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
What kind of furniture is this?
Speaker 5 (10:25):
Well, it comes from the Hollywood Furniture Company.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
Yeah, but what about the period?
Speaker 5 (10:30):
It comes from the Hollywood Financier Company period.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Yeah, that's what I meant. Oh say, Gracie, where's your kitchen?
I want to get a stam work.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
Oh but we haven't got any Sam in the FIDGETI.
Speaker 3 (10:40):
No, who's spam in the frigid air?
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Sam doesn't eat any refrigeration.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
Oh sh I forgot. I'll hate myself in the morning.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Oh oh, oh, what's there?
Speaker 5 (11:00):
That's my granddaddy. He's flying down the banister.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
He's sliding down a bob wire banish.
Speaker 5 (11:09):
So he goes it twenty times a day, and the
doctor told him to stop.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
Well, I imagine he would.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Sure dad was hot.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Well, I hope the kid makes a three point laming.
It is it isn't it is? It isn't it? It
isn't way. See, these fellows have been living in your
house for over a year. You don't know who they are.
Speaker 4 (11:33):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
Why don't you ask them?
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I don't talk to strangers. Well, this is somehow sure,
I'd better go and find grand daddy and give him
his medicine. You see, he hasn't got a nurse anymore.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Oh he had a nurse, yes, And the only.
Speaker 8 (11:46):
Way he take his medicine was when the nurse would
kiss him after every tea spoon fro.
Speaker 5 (11:51):
It was awful, stop.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Bitter, No, we have many teeths.
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Well, let's get this over with all right, Let's find
your granddaddy and give them us medicine.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
Boy, want a house? I've never seen?
Speaker 7 (12:08):
Hey, sal many four years in Harvard? Why are you
sitting out in the hall? Won't buy yourself soaking?
Speaker 3 (12:13):
A big Harvard Yale game this year? And I won't
be there. Why don't you go?
Speaker 12 (12:17):
Not after the sad experience I had last year? There,
I was at the stadium. It was the last quarter
of the score was nothing to nothing. Just as Yale
was making a touchdown, somebody stuck a gun in my
back and held me up.
Speaker 3 (12:29):
Well, there were millions of people. Then why didn't she yell?
What didn't have them think I was rooting for Yale? Oh?
Speaker 9 (12:38):
Come on, Gracie, Oh George, George, when you meet this
little redheaded girls and I, why don't you take it
of the follies, Bazier.
Speaker 3 (12:43):
It's a swallow show. All those Gary shows are all.
Speaker 7 (12:45):
The same, Hony, take away their feathers and their little
umbrellas and what have you got?
Speaker 3 (12:50):
High blood pressure? All quiet?
Speaker 5 (12:54):
Well are you granddaddy?
Speaker 3 (12:56):
Well, look, Gracie before we all go in, what's the
matter with your granddady? No?
Speaker 8 (13:00):
In the middle of the nightbeihood it strange, Nises, and
we ran into Granddaddy's room and.
Speaker 5 (13:04):
There he was shaking all over.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
He was shaking home. Yeah, well, what did you do?
What did we do?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
He sent for a doctor.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
What did the doctor do? Oh?
Speaker 5 (13:12):
You took the Madameazga record after the troll. We all
we got to keep again.
Speaker 7 (13:17):
Kid has probably got rumatism. I agree, Well, what's the
matter of Grandpa? Don't you feel well?
Speaker 4 (13:27):
No, George, you boy?
Speaker 3 (13:31):
Hey, hand me that picture headed along a sleeping tablet Oh,
I can't find Handy Lama's picture. Do you want that?
Do you want this one of Van Shrton? No, I'm
saving her until I feel better. Yeah, well, white Grandpa'll
look in this closet. It is it isn't it isn't.
(13:51):
I can't see ray she can't. Somebody else in your
family get him the medicine. I've got to take with
a little redhead.
Speaker 5 (13:57):
Well, my mother's got a stone closet.
Speaker 6 (13:59):
My guy went downtown the vat and Eddie went downtown
the boat yet and my body.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Election was over two weeks ago. Rung now.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
But my daddy's a Republican and he never gives up.
Speaker 4 (14:15):
Side.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Understand this.
Speaker 7 (14:16):
I try to date you the girl sing your verse,
look out, don't get excited, you'll break up, love Weason.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Don't worry about me. And besides, you said that wrong.
Put it on on me and don't get excited. You'll
break up, blood Weason. Well that's much better.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
Hey, buddy boy, what is it granddaddy?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Buddy boy, would you mind reaching him that code pocket
and getting me a cigar? What code Grandpa?
Speaker 4 (14:43):
The one George is wearing.
Speaker 3 (14:47):
There aren't any cigars in my pocket. You mean you
didn't get anything with that suit? That was a pretty
good one, Carnie, Oh quiet. Even if I did have
a cigar, if I did get a sig with it,
why should I give it to you. You're the tightest
old name I ever met. You never gave anybody anything.
Speaker 8 (15:05):
Ill judge, you shouldn't say that my granddaddy when he's
so sick he gave you something?
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Won Did he ever give me something tonight? Wan? Did
he give me amazomzo?
Speaker 10 (15:18):
Our heart?
Speaker 3 (15:20):
Any boys will give a sugar?
Speaker 4 (16:51):
Bay is Bay?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
I know her, I know that, Braceley. But if you
had granddaddy had the measles, he he shouldn't have kept
the secret.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
He didn't. He's been staying all around.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
Why do they ever go into this crazy? How Graci?
What's what's that she's up in?
Speaker 9 (18:34):
Yet?
Speaker 3 (18:34):
Who's backing my dad? Your grandmother? Bracy?
Speaker 7 (18:38):
When you tell your grandmother to stop, we can't continue
talking if she's gonna make all that noise uffairs.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
But this is the craziest house. Listen to that beat
beat beat beat beat beat Meat, Eat eat meat.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
I say, there, lady, when the shopping you go, here's
some news that you should know. Help me out, George,
I have on this far.
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I'll beat it out. B A two of the bar.
Spam is the meat that you should buy. Spam is different.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And here is why we use four shoulder to make
spam sweet and the ham it takes for extra good
meat and the extra good.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
Flavor that you get it. Spams got there, folks, of
course we added ham.
Speaker 8 (19:19):
Harm else dot it this new kind of meat season
get denonated fan to.
Speaker 3 (19:24):
Eat, I say, senor burnser spam for lynch. This delicious
meat is good to crnch. What seniority. It's crunch, not
crunch crench crench crunch crunch.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
You buy it all the time if you try it lunch.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
To get the real thing to put on your table,
look for this sentence on the spam can label park show.
Speaker 8 (19:43):
The meat with hand me down fruit. The dam is
really different my my mind, that doesn't fit.
Speaker 3 (19:51):
Yeah, that's right, Graysie, that's the worst one.
Speaker 5 (19:53):
Yet nothing is just like sam my fans.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
And so with this our poem hands when the shopping
you go tomorrow, ma'am ask.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
For sp am spam.
Speaker 11 (20:07):
Sly said, Die said, right, they just called scams.
Speaker 9 (20:24):
Look, Jorge, if there's a possibility if you're having the measles,
I wouldn't keep that date with that redhead.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
Well, don't worry about me, Audie. I'm going out right
now and get myself inoculated.
Speaker 5 (20:32):
Why do it tonight? Got to bring the new year'
z e.
Speaker 7 (20:38):
Luck, Gracie. Inoculation prevents sickness. You see, meetings of germs
can live on the head of a pin.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
How can we eat that? They use a knife, and
for ah, I'm going to get out of this house
before it's too late. Hold on there, mister, ready to
think you're going from going out off? So why oh no,
you're not.
Speaker 4 (21:00):
Nobody leaves this house.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
It's quarantine. I'm George Burns. I haven't got anything. I've
heard you in the air, brother, and you ain't kidding.
Got me tell you? Well, that says a fine thing.
Speaker 10 (21:18):
And I've got my shoo with your hallo johgey, you're
back from your date already?
Speaker 5 (21:22):
Did you meet that down?
Speaker 3 (21:23):
You can't say, Gracy, I will stopped by a cop.
Speaker 5 (21:28):
Oh that's what always happened in those podcas.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
I knew you can understand me once.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
I was in the park College, the freshest dying and
not what.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
He said to me. Will you be reasonable?
Speaker 5 (21:38):
That's what he said to me.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I'll stop, That's what I said to him, Racy. I
didn't even get out of the door. There's a cop outside.
He says your house is quarantine.
Speaker 5 (21:50):
He's crazy's duck o.
Speaker 7 (21:53):
Well, never mind, I'll see you later. I've got to
keep this date. I don't know where this doll is
doing for the wrong dog.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
Isn't that silly? The broom closet.
Speaker 10 (22:09):
Oh, look at the halloa, Josh, when did you get back?
Speaker 5 (22:12):
Did you have a knife?
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Phone head, Gracie, I was in the broom closet.
Speaker 5 (22:17):
A husband came home.
Speaker 3 (22:21):
But I'm trying to get out of this house of yours.
Speaker 5 (22:23):
Well, I've got an idea.
Speaker 8 (22:24):
Let's do what they do in the movies. Now, I'll
tie is dead sheet around you, and let's shaut.
Speaker 5 (22:29):
Of the window.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
That's not a bad idea.
Speaker 5 (22:31):
Hit the wrong then I'll tie this end of the bed. Ah, already,
jee climb out of the window.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Oh here I go, poach Graycy. Gracie, what part of
the beck that you tire?
Speaker 11 (22:46):
To you?
Speaker 3 (22:51):
I got to the place with Parantine. They'll get back
in that house?
Speaker 5 (22:56):
Well, look at the halloa?
Speaker 10 (22:57):
Joy, are you back from s good already? To have
a nighttown to.
Speaker 3 (23:01):
The red ward? See I was I almost killed myself.
I just went through that window.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
Oh her husband came home again?
Speaker 3 (23:07):
Huh. You know you could use another rounds of brains.
Speaker 7 (23:12):
Not me.
Speaker 5 (23:12):
I'm overweight now.
Speaker 7 (23:15):
No matter where I go, that Coppers there, I wish
he'd stick to his beat. Sick of his what beet
fe me me.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Spam is the meat that you should eat them?
Speaker 7 (23:25):
I know that.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
I don't. You should try, I know that. But we've
got it before. This poetry is going from bad to verse.
Oh it's just a little slip. Look at me. I'm frothy.
How can I get washed up? Just keep on telling
those jokes, brother, Gracie. Where's the washroom right down the hall?
Speaker 5 (23:46):
He can't miss it. It's the one with the gasoline pumping.
Sound of it?
Speaker 3 (23:51):
Gasoline pump.
Speaker 5 (23:52):
Sure, my grandmother is a tourist and we like to
make her feel at home.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
Well, I'll go in there and get means up.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
It is it is, it is, it is, it is.
Speaker 3 (24:04):
Wait a minute, all you guys have been doing is arguing.
What are you arguing about? I claim this Thursday is
the real Thanksgiving, and Joe says it is. Well, it is,
it is, it is. It makes hell, Gracie, I've got
to get out of here.
Speaker 8 (24:19):
Well, judge, why why don't you go up in the
roof and fly down the drain piece and then when
you get to the yacht.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
The drain and when you get to the yacht the
drain peep.
Speaker 5 (24:30):
Oh, pardon me, I was a sellie last night.
Speaker 7 (24:36):
If I'm going out with him and you won't be
able to speak English, did you send your burns when
you say that?
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Smile? Smile?
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (24:46):
S n e l L smile that smell? You're perfect? Oh?
Speaker 7 (24:59):
Please, everything happens to me here. I've got a date
with a girl. I'm all messed up. I scraped my nose.
Huh what a pickle looks more like a banana? Oh yeah, well,
my face happens to be all right. Doesn't bother me?
Speaker 5 (25:13):
Maybe that's the kind of you're standing behind it?
Speaker 3 (25:16):
Yeah? Maybe, Well, I just gotta get out of here. Mister,
why does that sound? Man?
Speaker 12 (25:20):
Just look at this goldfish bowl. It's a rhapsody and glass.
It's made of pure quartz, silicate.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
Time like this. You gotta impress me with his education.
There must be some way out.
Speaker 5 (25:29):
The man, what happened to the goldfish to win that goal?
Speaker 3 (25:33):
Ask me?
Speaker 5 (25:33):
What did you do with the goldfish?
Speaker 3 (25:35):
Forgive me, miss Ellen, and I couldn't help it. Once
a Harvard man, always a Harvard man. Oh that must
be some way out.
Speaker 5 (25:43):
No, I don't mind you're eating the goldfish. But Tom
Harmon is gonna get pretty angry.
Speaker 3 (25:48):
Why Tom Harmon is that great Michigan football player.
Speaker 5 (25:51):
Well it's talk of the name of our cat.
Speaker 3 (25:54):
You call your cat Tom Harmon.
Speaker 8 (25:55):
Well, yeah, that's an account of every time they gets
Lucy makes ten yards.
Speaker 3 (26:06):
Hey wait a minute, why did I think of this before? Cracie?
Where's the chimney right there? Well, goodbye everybody there, we
got the chimney A bok for a woman. Well here
it is about. There's the blue sky, blue sky. Enough
and that's my uniparm. See get back in there.
Speaker 10 (26:26):
Oh, look at the hall jockey.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
Bye?
Speaker 7 (26:37):
Why?
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Why?
Speaker 7 (26:39):
Why?
Speaker 1 (26:59):
Where's the one person in every family listening tonight? Do
is just one more small favor? All we want to
ask is that you remind mother to get a can
of spam when she goes shopping tomorrow. You'll be doing
a bigger favor for yourself because spam is absolutely the
most popular new meat item in a generation. Once you
taste spam's tempting flavor, it's tender, meaty goodness. You want
to serve spam often. Spam is so easy to prepare.
(27:22):
Try it tomorrow. Use the simple recipes on the label.
Ask your food dealer for s P A M.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Spam. Join the thousands who.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Say, whenever the occasion calls for delicious meat at our house,
we serve spam.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
Oh but I'm certainly in a fine message.
Speaker 5 (27:36):
Oh John, I get my brand. Daddy hasn't got the meat.
Speaker 3 (27:40):
Good, No, I can go with me.
Speaker 5 (27:41):
Oh yeah, then you can say hard on a brand day.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
He went to good night All.
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Join us again next week, same time, same station for
another Burns and Alan show with Ardie Shawn, his orchestra
and the Smoothies. Until then, this is what Easton, reminding
you to remember that cold ormhont spam hits the spot.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
Have you tried Hormale Chili caen Carney?
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Even those who think they don't like chili do like
chili con Carney the way Hormale makes it, because it's
different and everybody likes it.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Double your money back if.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
You don't like it, Try Hormale Chili Caen Carney tomorrow.
This is the National Broadcasting Company
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