End of the World and Politeness

In this episode, Shawna and LaLa tackle two pressing issues: disaster preparedness and the alarming decline in modern manners. They explore doomsday prepping essentials while highlighting troubling trends like kids bringing their parents to job interviews, the rise of laziness in today’s workplace, and poor customer service experiences. LaLa shares her frustration with a staggering $1300 electricity bill, a concern shared by many across the country facing similarly astronomical charges. Joining them is Frank DeRaffele, Executive Director of BNI Hudson Valley, who reveals how building strong professional networks can help you navigate and thrive in any crisis.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
From the heart of the city, where the beat meets
the rhythm of your day. It's shawna m.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
What's up.

Speaker 3 (00:14):
You're listening to Shauna and Lalla. Check us out at
Shauna and Lala dot com on all social media platforms
at Shauna and Lalla. You could follow me on Instagram
at the Real Shorta.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
May and check me out at Bella Underscore Lalla one
two five.

Speaker 3 (00:32):
What a crazy week it has been with this winter weather.
I am completely over winter.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
I know, I don't think I'm ever happy any winter,
but this winter for some reason, seems just dreadful. It's
been horrible. It's been cold, it's been disgusting, dreary, every
other you know, negative adjective I can think of. It's
just horrible.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
And we are getting more snow tonight supposedly yep, and
then I guess over the weekend we're supposed to get
snow too.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
So yeah, it's crazy. And it's just been so cold
because looking back on my memories, some days during February
even December January, we're warm because I had my windows open,
or I went on a hike actually last year around
this time because it was nice out. So this this
has just been relentless. It's like not getting warmer. It's

(01:24):
really horrible, it really is.

Speaker 3 (01:26):
And what's even worse is my dad is in Florida.

Speaker 2 (01:29):
Ohuckie.

Speaker 3 (01:31):
You know, they're having really good weather where he's at,
and he's on his boat fishing and he sends me
pictures you know, of him catching fish and you know,
of the lakes that he's on. And he texted me
last night it's gonna be eighty degrees tomorrow. I'm going
on the boat. I'm like, yeah, not here, he goes.
I know, I'm like, rub it in.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
He goes, yep, Yeah, making you jealous. It's not it's
not fair, No, not at all.

Speaker 3 (01:57):
Next time he'll have to take me with him.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
Yeah, take out everybody. I'm ready to book a vacation.
I said, that's my husband. And what's worse for me
is that this winter's been so cold. But if you're
in New York State, the electric bills are just crazy.
It's like hit or miss for people. If you're online,
all you see is either groups being made or people saying, hey,
is anyone else's electric bill super high? I don't understand

(02:19):
what's going on. You know, it's usually around two hundred,
but now it's six hundred, it's seven hundred, it's eight hundred,
and it's absolutely insane. And unfortunately, I am one of
those people who have my electric bill has just skyrocketed
for no apparent reason, and I'm not getting any answers.
So with this winter cold, my husband is freaking out
and keeping the temperature at fifty nine. Now now we're

(02:42):
down to fifty nine degrees in the house.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
You were down to sixty three, Yes, we were at
sixty three.

Speaker 2 (02:46):
And when the when the electric bill came back even
higher this month, it was in the eight hundreds, he
lowered it down to fifty nine now, and I'm like,
obviously it's not something that we're doing. Something has to
be wrong, because there's no way should be getting charged
eight hundred and something dollars when we're keeping the heat
at sixty three degrees every day like this is it's

(03:06):
just not fair. I hate it.

Speaker 3 (03:09):
Yeah, everyone seems to be complaining, But like I told
you earlier, I would really call the geo thermal people. Yeah,
I don't know, you know, since your electric company isn't
doing anything.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
Yeah, but it seems like no one's electric company is
doing anything and Geothermal that is on our list to call.
We're gonna try a different bunch of different avenues. But
right now there's a group online for our area saying, hey,
you know, it's about your electric bill being astronomical, and
they're doing a class action lawsuit. And now Blaize Gomez
is actually looking to interview people. So I'm gonna contact

(03:44):
her about their electric bills because this is just something
is not right. And the crazy thing is it's our
delivery fee. If you look at our electric bill, it's
like our electric bill is two eighty four, which is reasonable,
but the delivery free fee is almost five hundred dollars.
It was like four eighty seven for a delivery fee,
and they said that the delivery fee is, you know,

(04:06):
money that's going towards the power lines and the workers
doing the power lines. And we're getting our energy now
from Canada and in other states because they shut down
Indian Point, so now we're getting that's a delivery fee
to get our electric from Canada or for Pennsylvania. It's
absolutely absurd and I don't people are not going to
be able to afford it. And like my husband says,

(04:27):
it's not a bill that you can just stop paying,
you know, because with like if it was like a
credit card or a car, he'd be like, screw it,
just stop paying it. We can't afford it, you know,
let them. They can't do anything. But with your electric
you need it. You need electric, you know, so well
that's how they get you exactly. So yeah, it's it's
it sucks that this winter is so cold and that

(04:49):
now we're having these issues with electric that my husband
is pinching pennies and keeping it at fifteen nine degrees.
So I'm looking forward to summer more than ever to
get some warmth.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
I just can't believe that these companies are getting away
with it. You know, They've had senators and legislators look
into it, and it's been going on for a few
years now.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
Yeah, and it never really affected us until the past
two years, i'd say. And it's getting worse now. Our
next month's bill is thirteen hundred dollars we have to pay,
and it makes us sick to our stomach. You know,
that's just insane. That's like a rent payment, you know,
for electric, and we're never home. We both work and

(05:32):
we hardly keep things on. My dad has a four
thousand square foot house. I was on the phone with
him today. He lives in the area. He has a
four thousand square foot house that has drafts, was built
in the nineties. His electric bill, the highest it gets
is one hundred and seventy one hundred and seventy dollars
for our four thousand square foot house. Meanwhile, my house
is like, I think, twenty one hundred square foot. It's

(05:55):
brand new. It's insulated with that the foam, so it's
really insulated. Well, we have geothermal, and my electric bill
is thirteen hundred dollars a month. Get the get out
of here.

Speaker 1 (06:06):
You know.

Speaker 2 (06:07):
That's it's a scam. It's really and I'm so frustrated.

Speaker 3 (06:10):
You know, I really I think there is something wrong
with your electric It could be thermal. What are your
neighbors saying?

Speaker 2 (06:18):
Theirs was the highest it's been this this month, but
they're still lower than us. They're in the four.

Speaker 3 (06:23):
Hundreds so and their houses are.

Speaker 2 (06:26):
Geothermal too, bigger, Yeah, and they were all built the
same time, so yeah, it could be something wrong with
We'll have it checked out. But then what about all
the other people in the area who are saying their
bill went from two hundred to now it's eight hundred
or nine hundred. So I'm like, are they picking and
choosing who they want to scam or who they want
to try and get money from? You know, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
I mean you don't. You don't know because we me
and you, I think, have the same company and my
bill is nowhere near that.

Speaker 2 (06:53):
No, you're good. You're good, like no rhyme or reason
for it. So I'm gonna contact Blaze Gomez, she's a
local reporter for a new station, and we're gonna do
the New York State audit that you sent me, where
they're gonna come into our house and see where the
electricity you know, how much electric we're using. And the
final route for us is solar. I'm gonna try and
see if solar would work because we used to have

(07:15):
solar in our old house and our electric bill was
zero dollars. But we shouldn't have to do all this,
Like we have geothermal. We paid a lot of money
for geothermal that is supposed to be so it keeps
your electric bill down and it's really great. You know,
you're not using oil, you're not using propane, you're using
the ground. I don't know, but yeah, it could be
something wrong with the system. It's just hopefully we get

(07:36):
to the bottom of it before we freeze. Me and
the kids are gonna freeze to death anyway. So I
saw a post on the mom's group that really like
struck a chord with me, and the mom had written
for people that work with the public. When someone says
thank you, why don't you say you're welcome? And she's
been seeing this more and more and I'm like, yeah, like,

(07:57):
I don't know if you deal with this, show it,
but every time, usually it's at fast food places or
the grocery store. I go to the window, I'm like, hey,
you know, they give me my food, I'm like, thank
you so much, and they just shut the window. They
like they don't even interact with you, you know, they don't
even say hi. When you pull up, I'm like hey,
and they hand you your bag and then like thank

(08:18):
you so much, shut the window. And it happens more
than just one time. It's happened so many times, and
I'm like, what the hell you know, So I'll usually
like say you're loocal, you know, like stupidly, or the
grocery store. But yeah, so this mom wrote that, and
some people were agreeing or her like, yeah, I hate that.
They should know better. It's rude, it's disrespectful, and of

(08:39):
course you're gonna have some of the people who are like,
I don't see a problem with it. What's the problem
with it? You know? And so I went back and
forth with this woman because she said to me, I
don't see a problem with it, and you know, can
someone explain why it matters if someone says you're welcome
back to you. Yeah, it's rude, it's it's ridiculous. So

(09:01):
I'm like, can someone explain it? Okay, So I explained
to her. I'm like, it's something that it's just common
courtesy decency that you're you should be taught from a
young age to say you're welcome or hi or thank you,
and especially if you're going to work in anything customer
service related or with the public, you should that's just
part of the job. Hi, Hello, how's your day, thank you,

(09:24):
You're welcome. That's just it's just normal, like that's what
you're supposed to do. And this woman was arguing with
me that you know that you shouldn't have to do that,
that that these fast food workers are they're working hard
and they're mentally drained, and they don't have the energy
to say to have to say you're welcome, like this

(09:46):
is what she's telling me, Like that they don't they're
not there to seek You shouldn't be seeking gratitude, So
you shouldn't be saying, you know, thank you to them
or whatever, and they shouldn't say you're welcome to you.

Speaker 3 (09:57):
Then they shouldn't be working in that field. I mean
customer service.

Speaker 2 (10:02):
You need to be friendly, exactly so, And that's what
I said to her. And I'm like, every time I
go to, you know, a dunkin Donuts or another fast food,
they're just plain miserable. And it's unfortunately, it's a lot
of the younger generation. It's these younger kids. And I
don't know what is up with this generation. And I
hate that, Like our parents probably said that about us,
But are they not being taught these just common just

(10:25):
common courtesy and decency and respect for anybody, and especially
when you get you're in a job. And I just
I'm tired of the excuses. I feel like nowadays everything
is an excuse. There's an excuse for everything, and we
have to understand and be like, oh, okay, Yeah, they're
not saying you're welcome because they slept wrong, or they
they had to pick too many fries out of the

(10:47):
fry basket today and we shouldn't expect them to say
you're welcome. More high like, no, that's b s. You
have to to do your job right, have some respect
for your job and for your customers, because at the
end of the day, customers are how you get paid.
So you know your boss, yes, your boss is paying
you and that business, but they're able to pay you

(11:07):
because you have customers coming to your window or coming
to the grocery store. So it's not like you know.
And when I said it to the girl, she's like,
so it's a power trip. It's a power trip from
you then that you want these people to say you're welcome,
And no it's not. I get where she's going with that,
but no, it's it's just just common decency and respect.

(11:29):
You're in a job, if you if that's a job
you chose this, these are things that you should know
how to do and you should do them, and a
boss should be telling you like, that's what you're supposed
to do.

Speaker 3 (11:38):
Yeah, I was just gonna say you know, if I
was the boss of let's say McDonald's and somebody wasn't
being respectful or friendly, I would have a talk with them,
you know. And these kids these days, you know, they
don't want to work. They want everything handed to them.
And that is the problem with society these days. My

(11:59):
opinion is that the parents these days, they just hand
their kids whatever they want and they're not held accountable.
You know, I see it all the time in the
mom's group. Oh, the teacher called home. You know, my
kid is being disrespectful and being bad. I don't think
it warranted for a call home. No, your child is
being a boy. They tried to handle it in school.

(12:21):
It was multiple times. A call is warranted home so
that you could teach your child how to act in public.
I mean, it's just crazy. It drives me nuts.

Speaker 2 (12:33):
Yeah, that's an issue. There's no accountability. There's no accountabilities. No, no,
my kid wouldn't do that, or don't talk to my
kid like that, or how dare you? No, there needs
to be accountability. We need to be teaching our children
and these basic foundations of just being in society and
socializing and working with other human beings and being around

(12:54):
other human beings. And again we always say it the internet,
social media, phones, computers, Tablet says, taken that away from
this newer generation. It started once, you know, we had
we were kind of the first generation with the Internet,
and it's just gotten worse and worse, and the social
anxiety is out there, and yeah, like I don't know,

(13:16):
I teach my kids. My kids, as you know, are
very polite, even my toddler she's three, and since she
was two, she says, please, thank you. You're welcome to
strangers to me for anything, Like I gave her breakfast
this morning. That's just something I have to do right
as her mother, And she said, thank you, mommy, You're
the best mommy for something that I'm supposed to be
doing and feeding my child. But this is how you

(13:37):
raise your children, right. You teach them from a young
age how to interact with people and how to show
appreciation and how to be respectful. And we're losing that.
And I hope if parents are listening, like you have
to instill that in your children, especially if they're getting
a job, they have to know how to work with
the public, and if they can't, then they cannot work

(13:58):
in the public. They have to find a job where
they're behind the scenes or you know what I mean,
like working from home in their bedroom, or.

Speaker 3 (14:06):
If they do work at McDonald's, go work in the
kitchen flipping burgers where you're not dealing with the public.
You know. But then you brought up about the moms,
and now I saw a report that parents are going
to job interviews with their child.

Speaker 2 (14:22):
How are you kidding me? I mean, I don't want
to change your story, but do you remember the story
about my husband interviewing the younger generation for a police
a police position. He's a police officer, so he's hiring
a police officer and this kid was just out of
college and they had it all set up and the
kid calls him and my husband picks up the phone

(14:44):
and he's like, hey, I know, we have an interview today,
but I want my friends were going to the beach.
They're going to Jersey Shore, and I wanted to go,
so can we like FaceTime from the beach for the interview?
And my husband was like, excuse me. He's like, you know,
I'll go somewhere quiet. I'll go, you know, go to
our car, but can I face time from the beach?
And my husband said that's all right, well we'll reschedule,

(15:06):
and you know, he didn't reschedule because he's like, could
you imagine that kid as an employee, as a police officer.
Do you think for a job that serious that interviewing
to cancel or not cancel the interview, but not come
in person dressed up nice? You're gonna interview from the
beach in your your bathing suit while you're partying with
your friends like that. Oh yeah, that that's the right

(15:27):
thing to do.

Speaker 3 (15:27):
I do remember you telling me that I just I
have no words. You can't make this shit up. You
really can't.

Speaker 2 (15:35):
No, And this is our future generation of workers. It's
really bad. I think it's like the worst it's ever
been with the how these kids think it's okay, and
like it's from mommy and daddy babying them. It's from
mommy and daddy saying, oh, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay.
And like you said, now they're going to interviews with
their kids. Maybe they have to because they're look at
that right there. Maybe that kid needed his mommy or

(15:56):
daddy with them. They say, yoh, no, you need to
go in get dressed up in a suit and be
presentable and professional and sit down with that you know,
that person, an interview with them, not from the party
of the you know, partying on the beach, Like, oh
my god, Shauna.

Speaker 3 (16:10):
So you had an interesting week this week. I totally
forgot you were interviewed by a local magazine for your
prepping skills. I'm pretty sure all of our listeners know
Lala is crazy. She preps like no tomorrow, she hates aliens,
and she is afraid of the end of the world.

Speaker 2 (16:31):
Yep, that's me. Yeah, so I've talked about it on
the show. Before I came from My father was a prepper.
He wasn't a crazy prepper, but he always talked about
end of the world scenarios, or even if it wasn't
end of the world, it was like, hey, shelter in
place type scenarios or natural disaster scenarios where things are
gonna be closed down and you need to be prepared.

(16:51):
So I took a little everything of what my dad
taught me, and then I kind of went crazy with
it a bit. But yeah, so I have been prepping
for years now, slowly getting little supplies here and there,
stocking up my can good, stocking up water in the basement,
you know, just little things like that. And after everything
went crazy the last few years with COVID, and you

(17:14):
saw how you couldn't get items. You went to the
grocery store and the grocery store is empty. Like I
remember how scared I was going into my local grocery
store seeing everyone because the mask weren't out yet, people
wrapping their face and whatever they had at their house,
you know. And then all all the shells were empty,
all the meat, the meat was gone, the eggs were gone,
the milk was gone, cereals were gone, bread was gone.

(17:36):
And I'm like what and it was it was petra
Like I was petrified, and I'm like, this is it's
it's happening. My favorite line, it's happening. So I was
luckied enough to have a stash of things. The only
thing I didn't have was toilet paper back then. But anyway,
so flash forward now that that movie came out the
I think it was the Last of Us. I can't

(17:58):
remember what it was called, but it was a lot
of people got scared watching that, and it's like, hey,
how can I prep? So I help people and I
tell them what to do. And a local magazine saw
it's called Dirt Magazine and they interviewed me, so it
was really cool. She came and she took pictures of
all my supplies, mainly for my go bag. So I
had my go bag and I showed her everything that

(18:18):
was in it and it explained to her like what
to do in those scenarios. So yeah, it's really important,
and we're gonna post the video of it up and
then I'll share the article when it comes out. But basically, guys,
like we don't know what's going on in the world
right now. Everything is crazy. Politics are crazy, the climate's
crazy right now. So you should always be prepared and

(18:38):
you know, definitely have an emergency bag. Either it could
be a suitcase, a Duffel bag, a book bag, whatever
works for your family, whatever is easy and can carry everything.
That's great. My family, we have a book bag for
each person and then we have a Duffel bag full
of three days worth of clothes so that you can
wash them, rotate them, and you know, just I'm gonna
post up a video of everything you should have in it.

(19:00):
But it's best to start now. Be prepared, have a plan,
like I told the girl who was interviewing me, have
a plan if something goes down, especially an EMP attack,
which could happen either from our government or another country.
It's where the grid goes down, or or if there's
a natural disaster where we have no electricity. You have
to be prepared for that. You're not gonna be able

(19:20):
to contact family, friends, anybody to say hey, we're here,
we're going there, are you okay. You're not gonna have
there's not gonna be electricity for gas pumps. You're not
gonna have guests. You can't use credit cards or Venmo
or anything to get to buy anything. You are not
gonna have electricity or running water. So be prepared, prepare
for those things. Have a plan with your family and friends. Hey,

(19:40):
if something goes down, don't come to my house, We'll
come to you, or here's our meeting spot. Things like
don't take highways, stick on back roads because highways are
going to be swamped or closed down or just jam
packed where you can't get through. So just little things
like that I talked about in the interview. And I'm
gonna through the show, you know, the weeks of the show.
I'm gonna go in some detail on things and on

(20:01):
our Instagram, So keep on eye on that, keep an
eye out for the video, and if you ever have
any questions, you can reach out to me. I'm pretty
knowledgeable on it. I think I would say that, but
I'm definitely pretty knowledgeable on it and crazy, So both
of those things come in handy.

Speaker 3 (20:17):
My mom kind of grew up the same way, and
she instilled that in me to always be prepared. I
have a solar flashlight, I have one of those crank radios,
wind up radios. I have travel chargers. I mean you
need electric for that to charge them, but I always
have one charge just in case. And our whole basement

(20:38):
is pretty much full of water and canned tomato sauce
just in case. And that came from my grandmother. She
was always canning and she thought the world was going
to come to an end. She was always, you know, ready,
and she had a garden and she just she was
ready for the Great depression.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
But crazy means survival, and that's what I believe. It
is crazy. And people look at me, they're like, are
you kidding me? Even my husband, my husband thinks I'm nuts.
He's like, why are you getting this? Stuff. Why do
we have this shit? It's taking up space? And I said,
because what just for the what ifs. I'm not overboard
like I've seen some preppers and their their basements or
they have underground shelters that are full with years worth

(21:20):
of food. I don't have that. I probably have enough
food to last me two years, maybe maybe a year, probably,
But I just want to be prepared because when things
go down, you're gonna feel better to know, hey, I
have a plan in place. I have enough water for
my family to last. I have enough food for my
family to last. And I have go bags that I
can throw in the car if we have to evacuate

(21:41):
our house in two seconds. I have everything I need
in these bags in my garage, ready to go. And
you'll feel so much better and you don't have to
go as crazy as me or other people. Just the
go bag can have simple things in it. Medication, you
want to make sure you have your pass, support, your license,
birth certificates, marriage certificates, some foods now water, and in

(22:02):
you know, clothing. That's it. That that's what you want
to keep it simple, that's all you need. Me I'm
a little crazier, but that's just what I've you know,
makes me feel comfortable. So I think everyone should have
some sort of plan, and everyone should have some sort
of go bag, no matter what. And it doesn't have
to be a crazy thing. It's it's a smart thing.

Speaker 3 (22:20):
We're gonna hop into a exciting interview. We are interviewing
Frank Draffy, the executive director of the B and I
of the Hudson Valley, and we're gonna find out his
thoughts on what he thinks about communication and customer service
and these people that just don't have manners. You're listening

(22:43):
to Shanna and Lalla. Today on the show, we have
Frank Draffly, executive director of B and I, which I
am a part of. It is a business networking group
and it is very early in the morning, seven am,
so you can imagine me rolling out of bed at
like six fifty five.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
Seana is not a morning person, but not at all.
I'm glad she's doing it.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yes, but uh, Frank, how did you get started in
B and I? You obviously have your own business.

Speaker 1 (23:12):
Well, first, I want to say that if you're rolling
out of bed at six fifty five that I'm really
impressed because that's amazing how you show up. You're very lively.
The goualty. So I can't get together in five minutes.
If you can get to go in five minutes, that's
really impressive. So well, you know, I and B and I.
I had a I've had a consulting and training company
for forever, you know, kind of for thirty something years.

(23:33):
And I was down. I lived there, I grew up
and was down in Westchester County, right above New York City.
And I had somebody come and invite me to a
chapter in back invited me to a chapter for six months,
and I kept saying no, and then finally I said
yes because I was changing some things to my business.
So I said, okay, let me see what this is about.
And I went to a meeting. And actually I went

(23:55):
to the meeting a very negative attitude, like I hadn't
gotten there yet, and I was like, what am I doing?
This is dumb. I don't think it's gona be any good.
But I got there and they impressed the heck out
of me how well it was run. It was a
very good, strict business agenda. They're very serious what you do.
But it was also a very friendly atmosphere. So had
that combination of being a great business meeting but a
fun place to be. And so I sat there and

(24:16):
at the end of the first meeting, I was like,
I went from like, this is dumb. I shouldn't have
been here. It's at the end of the meeting, I
was like, yep, I'll sign up. What do I do?
And I joined. I became a member down in Westchester County.
And then after about I think it was maybe a
year of being in that chapter that was in White
Plains is where I was, I wanted to open a
chapter in Scarsdale, which is where I lived and had
my business. So I opened a chapter there. As the

(24:38):
president of that chapter. We grew that chapter to about
thirty five thirty seven people, and then I started, you know,
running that chapter as the president, and they asked me
to be a director down there. At the time, it
was called an assistant director, and so I started helping
to open chapters and fixed chapters and make chapters better.
And I really loved the whole concept of B and
I and what it was. I loved the pilosophy of

(25:00):
givers gain philosophy of that you grow your business, but
you do it by helping others. So I love that,
and then I ended up at about another year, so
I was going to move up here to where I
am now up in the Hudson Mid Hudson Valley area.
I was moving up to the Dutchess County. There was
no B and I up here, so I said, jeez,
I love to be involved in this, and it's a franchise.
So I bought the franchise for the mid Hudson Valley

(25:21):
area and that was actually as of now, it's thirty
years ago. As of now, we started this our thirtieth
anniversary year this year.

Speaker 3 (25:28):
Oh wow, So if somebody wants to get involved, what
is the process?

Speaker 1 (25:34):
But really, I mean the good news is B and
I's everywhere now. So it went from like I said,
when I first got involved, it was only in the
United States, it was like thirty thirty five states, and
then it expanded from there and now it's in I
think seventy six countries, so it's like everywhere you could imagine,
and especially here in the United States, it's pretty much
every every major state has it. Almost every major city

(25:57):
and suburb around the city has it. So all you
really need to do is go to you could mean
to find it, you can just go to you know,
BENI dot com or just put B and I and
then the city that you're in, it'll tell you those
local chapters. We're the B and I Mid Hudson Valley region.
So if people are in this this area, which is
a we have Duchess, Orange, Ulster, Sullivan counties, Uh, they
can they can be in a chapter here. And now

(26:19):
because of COVID. It was funny, you know, B and I.
Before COVID, every single chapter in the world was in
person everyone. There was no online chapters, and then COVID
hit and then a matter of like four weeks we
went to every single chapter being online, none being in
person because of COVID, and we stayed online for about
two years. And now we have both. So in every region,

(26:40):
you'll have online what it's called permanent online chapters that
they only do online meetings, you have permanent in person
chapters they only do in person meetings. And then you
have hybrid chapters that might have you know, one or
two meetings a week in person, one or two meetings
a week online, so depending on what that one of
the chapters. So it's really great because it's it. It
allows different people with different conveniences, if you will, to

(27:03):
pick a chapter that's best for them in terms of that, right, So,
you know, and we have people actually, even though we're
centered in the Midhuton Valley, we've had people from other
parts of the country join our chapter because they wanted
to be in this area. And we've been able to
expand geographically as well. So it's been pretty amazing.

Speaker 3 (27:21):
Yeah, in our group, we have people from Ohio up state.
Like I forget where Geno's from, but somewhere up you CAMEU.

Speaker 2 (27:31):
I think I've never know. I didn't know anything about
b and I and Shauna actually had me come and
join as a guest. And at first, like I was
like you like when people were telling you to come on,
I was like, come on, So I don't want to
do this, you know, I don't know what's it going
to do. But it was great, Like I got to
learn about different businesses I didn't even know where in
the area. I had people who then supported strangers that

(27:55):
were in the group, supported my business, you know, added
me on social media, and I learned not just necessarily
learned a lot, but I gained a lot from the
meeting of talking to people, hearing how they help their
business grow, and it is. It is a great thing
that I don't think a lot of people know about
or are utilizing, and it is. It's a great thing

(28:16):
if you have a business to join.

Speaker 1 (28:18):
Yeah, I think one of the things that makes the
meetings really interesting and productive is it's funny that you
know a lot of people be in networks for their profession,
like they'll be in the local real estate association group
or mortgage or whatever it might be. But being eye
about that, you know, diversity of businesses if you will.
So it's kind of like you imagine a chamber of commerce,
which I'm a big believer in the chambers. I think

(28:39):
you should be a member of one. And chambers have
every business you can imagine there be, and I is
the same. So in one chapter you'll have many, many
different professions there. And what's really nice about it is
exclusive by profession, right, So if I go in and
I'm a chiropractor, i will be the only chiropractor in
the chapter. So it's an exclusive membership which allows the
whole is for everybody to get to know each other,

(29:02):
to build relationships, to build loyalty, to each other and
then refer business. So when you're there, I think what's
really nice about it is you'll be sitting there and
you'll have people who are attorneys in different professions. You'll
have you could have, like I said, different types of
doctors there, chiropractors there, plumbers, electricians, engineers, pretty much, you
can name it. Like any business you can name can

(29:24):
be in BE and I. So it's really amazing to
see how that goes forward. And then people I think
what people learn BE and I a lot is you know,
I'm in this group and they're thinking, okay, with these
other professions, they're not really related to me, so they're
not going to help me. But they don't understand. Don't
we tell people don't judge by somebody or categorize somebody
by their profession, because the reality is they have mom, dads, sisters, brothers, cousins, uncle,

(29:47):
friends that all need your service, and they can be
referring you out. They may not be like what we
call referral source. They may not be referable to refer
you over and over because they're not in your world,
but they can refer you regular really to people that
they know. So that's really think the amazing people is
when people come into BE and I, there's a lot
to learn. So networking, word of mouth, marketing, and referrals

(30:09):
are a learned skill, right, they're not. They're not a
natural thing. Some people are a little more natural talkers
and can network better, but it's all a learned skills.
When people into BE and I, we teach them how
to do this, and once they get the skills down,
then they really flourish in their business growth.

Speaker 2 (30:25):
Yeah, you've been amazing what Shauna I listen in sometimes
when you're helping her with networking, and it is it is.
It's hard. It Sometimes you think networking is easy, but
it really it really is difficult in many ways, and
you do need that extra help.

Speaker 3 (30:40):
You do. You have to be outgoing, I think because
you're very quiet me.

Speaker 1 (30:45):
Yeah, I could be here, but that's not true. That's
not true. I think what's really important is, you know,
if you're going to be out networking, it's about doing
it authentically, doing it as you. We have a we
have a gentleman in our organization who wrote a book
and it was called now remember it was called the
the like the Introverted Network or something like that so

(31:07):
basically saying like, how can you be an effective networker
and you're not an outgoing person, and that's not really
the people who make the best sales Like I've done
sales training for years and people think, well, those people
that are really outgoing people are the best salesman. That
is not true. People who are the best salesmen are
those that are most authentic in what they do, meaning
they're themselves and when they're themselves, and people really gravitate

(31:29):
towards them in terms of that. So because sometimes you'll
have like you get that idea, oh a salesman, he
talks a lot, and he's loud, whatever, and that's kind
of like the used car salesman. Look, everybody thinks that's
not true, right, But if you're authentic, it's the way
you are that's what makes it difference. So when you're networking,
it's really about just being yourself and just you know,
and learning how to have a good conversation with somebody.

(31:51):
That's all not sell, but have a good conversation. And
if you're doing that, it can work for you effectively.
And I think the key and B and I is
when people say being a great networking organization. And what
I'll say is B and I is not a networking organization.
It's a referral organization, right, the referral organization that uses
networking as our tool to refer business. So to me,

(32:15):
a general networking organization is about meeting people, expanding your network,
getting to know people better, and that's wonderful, but there's
no necessarily end result in that. So in B and I,
we get focused on what the end result is. So
we measure how many referrals across the table, how much
money many money is being passed, how much money is
how much closed business is happening. So we can measure

(32:36):
everybody in the chapter how much money they're making in
the region. Like in our region, for example, we've had
we've averaged for the last ten years, our members have
passed somewhere between twenty five and thirty million dollars per
year to each other in the mid Hudson Valley region.
That goes from member to members. So we're in our
thirtieth year and we're finishing this calculation now, but it

(32:57):
appears that we've our members have passed a little over
six hundred million dollars in the last thirty years. To
each other. Yeah, so you know where it's pretty high.
It's it's pretty amazing because obviously the first few years
we only had a few chapters and it started to
grow and then we have chapters that pass a lot.
So so it's all about for me in this region,
it's all about the end result. If you're not making

(33:19):
money from B and I, then somehow it's not working
for you, or maybe you're just not making as much
as you think you should. And so that's what we said,
as we have our director's for sit with your directors.
They'll sit with you, they'll coach you, they'll help you
become more effective at this so you can get a
greater result in the end. That's what it's all about.

Speaker 2 (33:36):
That's amazing.

Speaker 3 (33:38):
That's crazy when I didn't know it was that much.

Speaker 2 (33:40):
Yeah, yeah, that's good.

Speaker 3 (33:42):
I'm thinking like twenty thirty thousand, fifty.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
That's good. There you go, Seana Wins And we got
to get you step by now, you know.

Speaker 3 (33:50):
Yeah, Fie, we need it.

Speaker 1 (33:53):
We're going to have you up there with Joe Rogan.

Speaker 2 (33:59):
That would be the dream, right right. And Sona told
me that you wrote you wrote some books too.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
Your sea I have a few books out. The last
one I wrote is called Business Networking and Sex Not
what You Think And there's a good doctor. Ivan Meiser,
the founder of B and I. He and I wrote
that book together with another lady named Hazel Walker, and
so the three of us got together. And what it's about,
unlike the title, what it's about, it's about the differences

(34:25):
in gender in the way that they network in business
and communicate in business. So there's the man's perspective, the
women's perspective, and then we have what we call the
data perspective. I think we ended up getting surveys back
from I think it was over about eleven twelve thousand
people worldwide, and from that data, we then kind of
wrote the book which basically tells, like, what are the
difference between the way that men and women communicate and

(34:48):
the way that they network and how do you do
it more effectively at work? So basically, if you're working together,
if you're doing sales, if you're working on a team, whatever,
but how do you collaborate better with the opposite sex
so you can be a more effective team. So we
did a book on that. I was the last one
that we did. Very first book I did was called
successful Business Networking. I had another one that's called two

(35:08):
hundred Ways to Increase Profits. Now we're working on a
couple others. So uh yeah, so done that and then I,
you know, I'm very lucky that I've also traveled the
world and been able to speak to different B and
I regions and help different being and I national directors
and their teams and executive directors and different people around
the world, and also to corporations. I go and I
do a lot of that's my consulting and training company.

(35:31):
I go in and do a lot of leadership development,
teamwork development, things like that with companies as well.

Speaker 2 (35:35):
So that's amazing. I do a lot. Yeah, you have
a lot on your plate, but you know that's what
that's what makes you successful, is that you're able to
handle it and do it successfully and that it's.

Speaker 1 (35:48):
Been an enjoyable life, that's for sure, you know. So
it's about I love being an entrepreneur and that was
kind of my first thing I realized when I was
in college. I got a you know, I started a
first couple of little businesses in college, and I love
doing that. And then when I got out of college,
I decided I can't work for somebody else. I got
to do it on my own and I started just
you know, probably wasn't my smartest idea out of Convince,

(36:08):
starting a business without really having true world experience, but
I made it work. It was hard, it was, you know,
especially the first three four or five years. I was
working like three part time jobs to support myself while
I was losing money in my business, you know, and
so trying to build it up and get it going.
But you know, it was and at that time, I
was working seven days a week, I was working one
hundred and ten to one hundred and twenty hours a week.

(36:30):
I'd put in you know, eighteen hour days, twenty hour days.
But you know what, I felt like I was on vacation.
I absolutely loved it. I loved everything I was doing.
I was passionate about it. So to me it wasn't work.
I was like, I gotta do this, I gotta do that.
I got you know, it was almost like I'd go
to sleep and I was I was upset to go
to sleep because I couldn't work on the business mode,
you know, And so but then I'd wake up next
morning with new ideas and what I could do, and

(36:51):
I just love that, you know. And I think, see,
I think I don't think i'd be a good employee.
Maybe now, but back then, I wouldn't be a good
it was. So I think about as an employee and
when I woke up, if I unless I truly loved
my job, i'd wake up and be like, oh my god,
like I can't do this, you know, And I can
tell you that that would not be a good me.

(37:14):
You know what I'm saying. It's like, I'm a type
person that I have to enjoy what I'm doing. I'll
be happy every day. And I just the fact of
the thinking about the fact that people wake up every
day not liking their job and going to work, I
get ugh. That kind of gives me shivers of even
thinking about that, you know. So it's just not what
I wanted to do. And if I did, I'd probably

(37:34):
that person that I always find a reason to be sick.
Oh I got to come and late, Oh I'm not
feeling good, you know, whatever it was, I'd be doing
that type of thing. But the fact that I work
for myself is and the fact that every morning I
wake up, I can make a decision if I'm going
to work today or not because I'm my own boss.
And the fact that I have that choice makes me
work very hard, right because I'm just like, it's for me.

(37:56):
I'm doing this for me, and the fact that I
have that freedom allows me to work very hard at
what I do, you know, in that type of pay.

Speaker 2 (38:02):
So yeah, yeah, I think certain people are more cut
up for that. Like my husband, for instance, he wakes
up every day he hates his job, and I'm always like, well,
we could start a business. I have my own little business,
let's focus on that. But you know, he's more of
he is not a risk taker, you know what I mean.
And I think that you're either born a risk taker

(38:23):
and you could, like you said, you jumped into it,
you had a work extra to make that. He's not
that type of person, and it is it's frustrating because yeah,
then you're waking up miserable every day when you could
be focused on building something of your own and not
having to work under somebody.

Speaker 1 (38:38):
You know, you're one hundred percent right at that. And
it's really important, I think for people who want to
start a business to really either know or find out
if they're really meant for that. So over the years,
I've had many people refer people to me who wanted
to start their own business. And they say, hey, Frank,
I got a friend of mine, my cousin, whoever it was,
that wants to start a business. Would you talked to him?

(38:58):
I say sure, and I'll sit down people for free
and have a conversation. When I have that first conversation
like this person's very serious about wanting to start their business,
like meaning leaving a job or investing a lot of
money to do that, I will sit with them for
an hour or two. And what I'll do. My goal
in an hour or two is to try to convince
them why they should not start the business. Right. So

(39:18):
I'll talk with them be like, well, you know this
could happen and be this thing they're like, And I
get pretty darn convincing. I can tell you because I
can talk from real world experience. What can happen. Bad
credit that you could get, you can get in debt,
you're stressed, amount of work, seven days, We'll meet, all
this kind of stuff. And if at the end of
that meeting person says like, yeah, I don't I know
that's I can't do that. There's no way I can
do that. So if I've convinced them to not start

(39:40):
their business, then what I really did as I just
save them a lot of money and time. Because if
I can convince you in an hour to not do
your business, you were never meant to do it. But
I've had those other people at the end of two hours,
they're just like, I don't care what you say, you
son of a I'm still gonna do this. Okay, you're
the man right there. I mean, at the end you
can just kind kind of swear me out and say,

(40:01):
I don't care what you say, I'm going to do it.
I'm like, now I know I got the right person now,
right because because they don't care what I say, they
have it in their mind they're going to do this
no matter what, and that person's not gonna be able
to stop them. So that's really important is to know
what you're going into. And I would I would advise
everybody before they start their own business because there's many obstacles,

(40:22):
many challenges to starting and running your business. So if
you're going to go into that, speak to if it's
not like a coach or consultant, speak to business owners,
you know, speak to four or five of them, maybe
even in the industry you're going into to get their feedback.
What was it like to start a business for you?
What would you do different? And find out what that
work ethic is like and the hours you have to
put in. It's a sacrifice. Starting your own business is

(40:44):
a sacrifice to me, it's well worth it. To other people,
it's not. You know, if people want a simpler life,
let me just go to work, do my time, come
get my paycheck, and I'm happy, And that's great. Nothing
wrong with that. Not my style, but that's that's great,
you know. So I think it's important for people to
do that, you know. So it's you know, I think
we've all heard data that says something like, you know,

(41:04):
out of all the small business that start in the
first three years, eighty eighty five percent of those businesses
will fail, and the next three years, fifty percent of
those will fail. Right. So I'm going to tell you why. Okay,
the reason that eighty eighty five percent fail in the
first three years is because ninety percent of them should
never have started the business in the first place, because
they weren't the right people, they weren't ready to do it.

(41:26):
They were good at what they did. They were good
at plumbing, or they were good at being electrician, or
they were good at, you know, being a good florist
or whatever it might have been, but they didn't understand
or know the business of the business, right, And that's
where I think it's really important to understand, Like, you
may be good at what you do, you may have
a skill set of what you do, but if you're

(41:47):
gonna have your own business, you have to understand marketing, sales,
customer service, management, leadership, teamwork, development, et cetera. There's a
lot of things to it. And over the years when
I've consulted, and I consult with like every type of
business you can imagine, and people have asked me, how
can you work with businesses and help businesses in all
these different industries from restail stores to manufacturers to trades people,

(42:09):
to doctors and lawyers and whatever it might be, like
every business you can imagine, And I'd say, because I'm
not helping that business. What I'm helping is the business
of the business. So if you look at a business
as being one hundred layers, right, the top thirty layers
of any business is that business. So it's a plumber,

(42:30):
so it's a retail store, so it's a chiropractor, so
it doesn't matter. But the rest of that, the other
seventy percent is the business of the business. The principles
are the same no matter what business it is. Marketing
principles are the same, right, Sales principles are the same.
Leadership principle is the same, Infrastructure is the same, Budgeting
is the same. I mean it's the same but different, right,

(42:52):
So are you going to market these different businesses in
the same way. No, but you're gonna use the same
principles and then customize those principle it's what they need
to do. And the problem is people go into it
and they really don't know and most people don't know
anything about marketing and sales. They know about their skill set,
and that's probably those are probably the single most important
thing is marketing, sales, and then the financial side, being

(43:14):
able to know how to budget and to make your
money last if you will. So those are the important
things when you're going into it. So it's just starting
business is very, very challenging. There's a lot of obstacles
and you have to make sure you're ready for it
and you're doing as much as you can to make
it happen for me. You know, back when I started,
there was no Google back then, so you couldn't google
starting a business, right, Basically, I just started doing what

(43:37):
I thought made sense. But then I was I was
a a I devoured knowledge, So I bought books, I
bought audio tapes. I did that at one point, you know,
just a couple of years ago, I moved out of
my office. I had over six hundred books there that
I run on everything you can imagine, from marketing and sales,
the leadership to you know, everything. And so I would
just I do books and audio books, and but I

(43:59):
just gain more knowledge, gain more knowledge, gain more knowledge,
and apply it to my street knowledge. And that's really
what allowed me to learn how to grow my business.
And and failing a lot. I'm gonna do this, this
is a great idea, and I go, Okay, that was
not a good idea, you know, and so just making
sure you're not doing that again. And so it's like, well,
that lost me some money. I'm not gonna do that again. Yeah,
So it's learning as you go forward, you know.

Speaker 3 (44:22):
Yeah, we've definitely learned.

Speaker 2 (44:24):
Yeah, it's it's it's hard and for you to bounce back.
And then that's important too, because some people would feel
defeated like that. I can get that way where I'm like,
this is stupid. What what's the point of me doing this?
You know it's failing. But for you to be like, no,
all right, that didn't work, Let's try something else, Let's
try something else. And I admire that, I really do
most people.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
Yeah, I think. I think in business law it's it's
when you fail at something, what you really don't You've
just discovered the right way not to do something. Yeah, right, Okay,
so now I know that's not right. So but then
I can I can adjust that go forward. So and
I think today, in my opinion, it's probably much easier

(45:05):
to get a business going today because there's so much
knowledge online between books and audiobooks and podcasts and now
videos like you could probably go on YouTube and start
say how do you start up? And name any type
of business? How do you start and name the business?
And there'll be like eight thousand videos showing you high
and people have courses. You know, there's so many things

(45:26):
to do that way, So there's it's really great to
have that and all that knowledge available to you. Plus
marketing wise, I mean, now the internet is like, you know,
a great marketing tool. So now there's all these different
ways you can do it, you know, some of it
for a lot of it for free, and other ones.
Even if you're paying for marketing on these different social
media platforms, they're not very expensive in comparison to other things,
right in terms of that, So it's knowing what works

(45:49):
for you and how to work it and then using
traditional methods, you know, so putting post tards together and
actually mailing them to people's houses, you know, and things
like that. Whatever it might be. There's all different ways
to make it work for people. So it's really finding
out what's going to work best for you in terms
of that, you know. So it's a it's interesting.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
Yeah, I'm trying to be more focused on that. It's hard,
you know, it is hard, and then you go about
with self doubt and then, like you said, things failing
and trying to find the right groove to make things
like oh I failed at this, all right, I'm not
Let's move on to this and that, And it's like
a it's like a puzzle, trying to make the perfect puzzle.
All the pieces fit together perfectly to make it work.

Speaker 1 (46:29):
So yeah, and I think you know, I think you're right.
I think part of that is if you if you
understand the the foundational principles of business what makes it work,
and let's say marketing being one of them. What you
need to know then is are you a marketing person
like me? Do you enjoy that process of coming up
with the creative ideas for marketing and how to put

(46:50):
it together? Like you can read about it and do
all that, But if you're really not into it, then
you're not going to do a great job at it.
And if you if you're not saying well, then I
guess it'll be a failure. No. Now, how all you
know what you're not good at or you don't want
to do, so find somebody who can do that for you. Right,
That's the key is is fill in your gaps, know
what your strength is, and work in your strength you know,

(47:10):
and then have other people fill up around that. Help
people help you in that way. And that's what I
find a lot like in B and I is you're
in a chapter, you're trying to do something, and you
get all these different business perspectives from people people are
willing to help you and give you advice and you know,
do those types of things. And that's really wonderful to
see that type of camaraderie come together of small business

(47:31):
owners and sales professionals working together to help each other
and really grow. And that's what's one of the things
I hear all the time, not just in our region,
but from regions around the world. What I've traveled is
people just say, you know, the the camaraderie, the idea
of everybody coming together to help me. They feel like
they have a real support team in place to help
them do what they want to do. I know a

(47:51):
lot of people who worked for a corporation or a
business and they and they then decided they were going
to go out on their own. And they told me,
the only reason I sided to go on my own
was because I knew my b and I chapter would
support me. So they went out and they instantly had
that group of people that were going to help them,
refer business to them, do business with them and help
them kind of get off the ground. And they had
to invest, you know, virtually nothing to do that. Depending

(48:13):
on type business it is. So it's important to make
sure you know, you know what you're good at, what
you're not good at, what you need to strengthen yourself
as in terms of going forward. So I've seen that
over the years when I've done a lot of consulting
and training and coaching with companies as well. So it's good,
you know, it's it's good good to see people come

(48:35):
together and help each other out in that way.

Speaker 2 (48:38):
No, I saw that. I just went to one and
one meeting and I did see that. So everyone was helpful.
They were so nice. They were like they wanted to help,
like what can I do for you? I had Devin,
what can what can I do to help you your
business grow? And I thought that was just amazing. You know,
it was really nice. You don't You don't really see
that in the real world. I'm not the being nice

(49:00):
not a real world, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (49:02):
Well, you saw a post today on Facebook that what
was it about not saying please and thank you?

Speaker 2 (49:08):
Like, yeah, they're people were asking they've been going to
businesses lately and it seems like everyone's so robotic and
they don't even say you're you're welcome. If you say,
you know, you say thank you to a cashier they
just ignore you. And a woman was like, what's going
on in the business world? And unfortunately there was a
few people who defended it and was like, well, they

(49:29):
don't need to say you're welcome. You know, they're mental
over they're probably you know, overloaded mentally from the day
at the work and this, this and that, And I'm like,
you know what happened to all the how business used
to be run where you have that respect for your
customer and appreciation. So it was crazy, just yea and I.

Speaker 1 (49:47):
And I believe that type of thing stop starts from
the top down, right, So the person who owns the
business or runs that, the general manager, ever it might be,
it's that person that if they're how are they instilling
that and the people that work for them right in
terms of their training and development and what they're doing
in terms of how do they treat the people that
work with them, and are they modeling what they want
to see those people do? And you know, I told

(50:09):
I remember working for one company and we're doing a
customer service thing and I said, okay, we're going to
go out. We did like a class trip that day
right at about fifteen of us and I said, so
we're going to go out. We're going to go into
different stores. We're going to go around. Maybe we're going
to buy a little something. And I said, and we're
going to do is when we go up to the
cash register and we go to pay for it, we're
going to pay for it. And then after we you know,

(50:31):
they give us our receipt back, and we're going to
look at them and say thank you so much. And
I said, they'll probably say thank you whatever else. But
here's the deal. If we say thank you before they did,
they just failed. They just failed. Like I just said
thank you for letting me buy something for you, which
makes no sense, right, So they came that person's shoot
as they're handing you the receipts and so, thank you

(50:51):
so much, hope you have that, anything else I can
do for you, let us know and really kind of
greeting you, making you feel good in terms of that.
But if you do it, they or if they just say, oh,
you're welcome, then they didn't get it and doesn't mean
they're a bad person. Means they weren't trained correctly, or
it could also mean when you're like what you said,
some people go in and they don't give a reaction.
They're doing whatever is then it could be that they're

(51:14):
not the right match for the job, like that's not
the person you should have doing that job, you know,
in terms of it. And it was just like there
was I'll tell you a funny story. It was a
B and I meeting actually years ago, and I was
the director to the I go to the chapter meeting,
and basically what happens when you go to the chapter
meeting in person, there's a table it's called the visitor's table.

(51:34):
When you walk in and you walk up and there's
people there to greet you, The visitor hosts to greet you, Hi,
how are you here for be? And I just like
somebody in a restaurant, like great you as you walk in,
right the hostess. And so I walk in and usually,
like you have, the visitor host is usually very lively.
And I walk in. There's this guy who's standing there
and he's like tall, he's like six or five or something.
We're bigger and he's big, and he's standing there, and

(51:57):
so I walk over and I was like, I'm walking up,
but he's just standing there alone, and I was like hi,
and he's like hi, and I was like, Hi, I'm
I'm put my hand out. I said, I'm Frank Draftley,
I'm a director. I'm here for the meeting today. He says,
you're here for the B and I meeting. I said yeah,

(52:17):
and he just says, can you sign in for me?
I was like sure, So I sign in? Do you
have two business cards? I was like sure, I take
up his cards on other B and I business cards. Okay,
And I hand him the BI business cards and he
looks and I can see he's very confused, like why
do I have B and I logos on my cards?
Like he's even though I very said a director, he
just didn't get that right. So I was just like okay,

(52:38):
and he's like, and and who invited you here today?
I was like, I'm the director, I'm here doing a
visit to do whatever. Well, and he's like okay, and
do you know how the meeting work? And as he's saying,
I'm like, oh my god, kill me now. The president
of Hey, Frank, how are you? And I walking back
in and I'm walking I said, what was that? He goes,

(53:01):
I know, I know he's just stepping in our visitor host.
You know, couldn't be here we had, somebody said, but
he stepped up. I said, okay, I said, God bless him,
I said, but that's not the right guy for the job.
You know, basically having lurch at the front door was
not the right there. You know, I'm just like, god,
you know he was. He was doing the best he
could and by the way, he did everything technically right right,

(53:24):
but he didn't have the personality for it. That wasn't
his comfort zone. So it wasn't bad on his part.
It was for our part. It was a bad hire
right when we put the wrong person the wrong position.
Even though he was very nice, right whatever up, but
he was just so dry and like didn't make you
feel welcome. And there's another chapter I went to speaking
about the opposite and I go in. I've never met

(53:45):
them before, and I'm I'm I walk in this restaurant
and I see like I can't find they were in
the back. I look. I'm like, they're like, right, are
you here for being? I begin, Come here, come here,
come on, And I was like, tone down your frank,
you wrecked, Oh my god, come here, and they give
you this big hug and it's like that's great, You're
I was like yeah, I'm like, oh, it's fantastic, come here.

(54:06):
Recommends that everybody. This is Frank. He's a direct with being.
Everybody's like, oh my god, they come both they giving me.
This is like I'm Italian. This is like going to
Thanksgiving your everybody's hugging. Oh Frank is so cute, you know,
pinching me and kissing me. I'm just like, oh my gosh. Right. So,
but they're they're known as the Hugging Chapter. That's their reputation.

(54:28):
I just I felt so welcome, so wonderful when I
went there. I was like anyone's said, I don't want
to leave. I love you guys. It's just one of
those things that sometimes you can't. I look at like
a B and I meeting and it's just a it's
a microcosm of what business is. You know, are we
doing all those right things and are we making them?
Are they making them really work? So that's that's the
key of it is if you're going to go into

(54:49):
your own business, you know, make sure you know what
you're doing. Know there's gonna be a lot of obstacles
and challenges. You go forward, gain the knowledge you need,
get a support system, around you. Do not try to
do it your own. Do not try and do it
on your own. You need that other knowledge. You need
people to kind of guide you and what you need
to do. Really important.

Speaker 3 (55:08):
So if our listeners want to start a business and
want you to coach them, how do they go about
contacting you? Uh?

Speaker 1 (55:15):
Probably best is if you go to my website, which
is pretty simple. It's just Frank Draffly dot com. So
Frank the last name is not easy, but Frank Draftley
dot com and it's just Frank and then d Raffley's
d E R A F F E L eight the oh, yeah, right,
you have Frankdrafty dot com. That's my speaking site. So

(55:38):
they'll see there, they'll see videos of me speaking and
that type of thing. But also if they wanted to
find out more, they can just email me there as well.
Or I'm also you know, for B and I. It's
all a simple emails is Frank at b n I
h V for Hudson Valley b N I h V
dot com is my email bn I h V dot com.
So yeah, well thanks guy. I really appreciate you having

(56:02):
me on today. This has been great.

Speaker 2 (56:04):
It was fun, it was fun. I hope that people
utilize the n I or you you know, for for
other businesses or coaching. And I am saying guys firsthand,
I went to one meeting and it was it was great,
and I still have connections from the one meeting. So
I can't even imagine if I was in it every
week how many connections I would have or make.

Speaker 3 (56:22):
And so we make different connections too. There's not just
you know, our meeting every Wednesday. They have different get together.

Speaker 2 (56:30):
Oh yeah, like the luncheon or breakfast you were telling me.

Speaker 3 (56:33):
Yeah, they have a luncheon, they have a breakfast. Then
they have like different events around the county. That's cool,
and you meet other members.

Speaker 1 (56:41):
Yeah we do. We do. Sometimes we even do ax
throwing at night, so there really yeah yeah at throwing. Yeah,
I've been fun, fun, different things like that. So we
all try and find different reasons, different fun ways to
get together outside the meeting and uh and make them
very productive in terms of that. So but if you know, love,
if you were in the group on your basis, you know,
just be over your house. You get more food from.

Speaker 2 (57:02):
You, I know, to make you all canolis and some pasta.
There you go, Well, thank you so much for coming
on the show. We love having you and I mean Shawna.
You see them all the time.

Speaker 1 (57:15):
Everyone's there, so thank you so much. Guys really appreciate it.
Let me know if it's anything I can do for
you guys.

Speaker 3 (57:21):
Okay, all right, thanks and that's our show for this week.
Thank you so much for tuning in. Check us out
at Shawnaandlala dot com. You can follow me on Instagram
at the real Shawna May.

Speaker 2 (57:32):
And check me out at Bella Underscore Lala one two five.

Speaker 3 (57:36):
We will see you next week.