November 28, 2023 • 46 mins
Join us for a special episode as we turn the spotlight on one of our hosts, Karmen, diving deep into her journey and the behind-the-scenes that makes this podcast what it is (what is that exactly?) It's part 1 in a celebration of two incredible years of laughter, insights, and unforgettable moments. Tune in as we share favorite memories and toast to the amazing community that we are a part of. Don't miss your exit! Cheers to two years!
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Visit us:
www.smalltownusashow.com
Follow us:
Twitter --> https://twitter.com/smalltownusashw
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Introducing, the exciting partnership between BLUEVIEW Footwear and the 19 Media Group Network. Just visit BLUEVIEW to start your sustainable style journey. Let us know if you purchas and we'll give you a shout out on our next show!
SFX by ZapSplat
Follow 19 Media Group:
Twitter: @19MGroup
Instagram: 19mediagroup
https://www.19MediaGroup.com
Discover our favorite podcast gear and support the show—shop our studio must-haves on our Amazon Affiliate page! https://www.amazon.com/shop/19mediagroup
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
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(00:46):
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View nineteen today and you'll see theultimate collaboration of fashion, sustainability and media
excellence. Heck yeah, I'm wearingnine right now. Navigating to small Town,
USA walkers for Charley. Hello,Jessica Cars, Happy anniversary. Yes,
(02:38):
it's two years, it's been Ican't believe it's been two years already.
It's crazy, that's crazy. Wewere babies. We would be walking
Yeah, you would be almost sayingfull sentences. Yeah, and let's just
clarify it's small town's anniversary, notours. Oh yeah, yeah, Jessica
(02:59):
and I'm not couple. How wasyour Thanksgiving? Our house ended up being
a bunch of sickies this last twoweeks, so we did still feel well
enough at the time to go tomy mother's house and celebrate Thanksgiving, and
we were a little bougie. Wedidn't do traditional turkey because you know what,
(03:19):
I think I realized last year andwe kind of talked about it that
I don't really love turkey and alsoI don't love eating it afterwards for like
three days. So we're like,you know what, let's do something different.
Let's just do the things we liketo eat and bring it together.
How is yours? How is yourThanksgiving? It was, well, I've
been sick for like a month.Yeah, came down with the COVID again.
(03:42):
It's like every Thanksgiving or every otherThanksgiving. I don't know. At
this point, it's like whatever.But we were really sick. My mom
was sick, my husband got sick. We were testing negative, and we
were so psyched because my sweet nephewwas coming for Thanksgiving. That's a tradition.
Yeah, and he was excited becausehe hasn't had a great year.
He was carving the turkey and tooka big bite and started choking. He
(04:08):
could breathe, but it was adeep choke. It was in a esophagy
blockage, so he kind of slowpanicked, if that makes sense. Yeah,
you know, he's trying to hideit in. And then finally he
was like, yeah, I thinkI'm gonna go to the hospital. So
he went over to a local hospitaland they had to put him under and
do an extraction and pull all thefood out, and the doctor was bitter.
(04:30):
The doctor was like, there wasmore than turkey in there. He's
like, I'm sure there was,you know. Okay, you know,
it's not like you have to reportthis to the police or anything, but
yeah, ok, there's also probablysome salami and cheese in there. But
then my husband started feeling weird andI thought we were gonna have to take
him, but instead the neighbor,my old neighbor, because I moved recently,
(04:54):
right and my old neighbor, whois a woman who suffers from mental
illness, are actually not so muchher as much as other people suffer from
her mental illness. Me mostly shewalked into our old house which we're renting,
and their dog bit her on herfoot, Oh my god, resulting
(05:15):
in stitches. But by the timeI got over there to attend to her,
she had her foot in a plasticbag that was filled with blood.
She's like, You're like, ohyeah, but she loved the fireman.
Oh my gosh. She lied,she said she told them that she was
a bawd lowdowncer for thirty years andshe thought they were admiring her legs.
(05:36):
So when I went back to checkon her the next day, I had
to go pick her up at thehospital too. She went by ambulance,
so I was at two different hospitalson Thanksgiving. Oh my god. So
by the time I got home,I was just like, fuck Thanksgiving.
My poor nephew though he loves Thanksgivingdinner, that's like his favorite thing,
and he didn't even get to eat. And then he came home from the
(05:58):
hospital and all he could do washow of like liquids. So we're trying
really hard to make mashed potatoes andgravy as liquidy as possible but still appetizing.
Yeah right, yeah, yeah,And we got creative. I like,
have some nice chicken and stars,buddy, but everybody. Everybody's okay
now, and overall it was areally good day. The turkey was delicious,
(06:20):
and I do love a turkey sandwich, but I don't put cranberries and
stuff on it. I just liketurkey and mayo and salt and pepper on
a toasted whole wheat and seed bread. This is really bad timing to me,
but basically on Tuesday, I hadsome dental work done and had been
putting it off for a long timejust because I you know, nobody really
(06:41):
loves dental work, and it wasI had to get a crown like weigh
in the back one of my molers. It took forever. I was in
there for four hours because it wassuch a difficult spot for them to get
to. Even though it was numb, I couldn't feel the actual things happening,
but my jaw and everything was justso thore. And then obviously like
(07:02):
you're up you know where, theyput in the injections of sore the next
day. So when I got outof the out of the dentist, they
had numbed me so well. Mywhole right face, like my whole right
side of my face was like frozenlike botox, and like if I couldn't
(07:24):
like Harley blink really because it wasso nut yes, And so what would
happen is I would be like Ilook myself in the mirror after for like
the whole day, the rest ofthe day, I would look at myself
in the mirror and I'd start laughing, but only one side of my face
would smile. The other side waslike browning, this crooked, like look
like this. I'll send you avideo. I don't know if you and
(07:45):
the then the harder you laugh,the worse it looks. Because I could
be like open mouth and my faceis just silent crickets on one side.
That's how people would I know.I know, yes, I'm aware.
We're not making fun of people.We're not making fun of it, you
(08:07):
know, it's just like having symptomssymptoms of it. Yeah, oh my
gosh. But anyways, it wasa couple days before Thanksgiving and a couple
of days after. Man, thatwas soa Even though we had this really
nice U dinner, it was hardfor me to get through because I just
could not. So Carmen, Ithink you know, since it's our anniversary,
(08:30):
our podcast anniversary, I don't thinkwe've ever done anything to kind of
talk about who we are anything aboutourselves. We don't our listeners don't really
know too much about us in general. So I wanted to just take the
time today and another episode. Sotoday we're gonna just quiz and interview you
(08:50):
as our guest, or I willtake the time to interview Carvin today because
I mean, these are kind offun questions or not anything too deep and
you could bring up on and it'stoo deep by Jose, I'll decline,
but read on Jessica. Okay,so first question is how are you doing
today? For real? I'm hangingin there above average, but I don't
(09:16):
know. I mean, I'm okay. I've got work stuff going on and
you know, family stuff, butI'm better than average. Okay, that's
fair. Yeah, So what hasbeen going on in your life recently that
you expect, you expected, orthat you didn't expect. Well, at
my Thanksgiving there were a lot ofunexpected surprises there, yes, yep.
(09:37):
But uh also we I lived inmy old house for many years and we
never had a problem with a mouse. But when we were moving, we
discovered a mouse in the dog toys. So it ran away. We packed
everything up. We got to thenew house. I was cleaning out the
dog toys and there was the mouse, and it ran and it got in
(10:00):
a dogbed. So we took thedogbed out and we'd let the mouse go
outside, but I think he gotback in. And this is not expected
and it's certainly not well received inmy house. A mouse. I love
animals outside, but I do notwant a mouse in my house, certainly
in my sofa or my dog toys. I don't want. I don't want
(10:20):
a mouse in the house. Mousein the house. That is pretty unexpected
and also really disturbing. My momis still standing on a table because my
mom moved in with us, andshe's still up on the dining room table.
I can't get her down. Sothat seems like it's something that was
expected. Your mom moving in withyou. Oh, yes, yes,
(10:41):
I'm going that's going really well.It's been good for both of us.
Yeah. I like your mom.That's awesome. She tells it like it
is. She sure does. That'sgood. Yeah, I'm glad to hear
that. I'm glad to hear that. Okay, so kind of random question,
what is your favorite me? Like, what's your favorite thing to eat?
(11:01):
You like a lot of stuff.I'm that way too. I don't
know if I could pinpoint something,But what if you had what's the first
thing comes to your mind? Likewhen I say what's your favorite meal?
You know, I love anything Ilove. I love Italian food mm hmm.
But I also love tacos. Iwould have to say my all time
favorite food is a variety of tacos, especially out here. Oh yeah,
(11:26):
yeah, that's a good stuff heretoo, So yeah, yeah, all
right, So this question is alittle bigger, so you you decide where
to start. But so, Carmen, where are you from? I am
from Ancorage, Alaska. I wasborn in Anchorage, Alaska, but then
shortly after my birth, I movedto Wyoming. From Wyoming to Colorado,
(11:52):
where I stayed for a long time, well several years anyway, and then
Missouri, Kansas City, Missouri,which was a big town, a big
town. I lived in small smalltowns up until then Kansas City, Missouri,
even though Ray Town was like ait's a suburb of Kansas City,
and it's small. They all runtogether, as you know, like it's
like any big city you've got likethese tiny named towns that are all actually
(12:16):
part of a much bigger metropolis.Back to Wyoming, back to Colorado,
from Colorado to a small town inCalifornia. Back to Colorado and oh Elko,
Nevada. I lived there. I'msure I'm missing some places. And
then Flagstaff, Arizona, and nowTucson. So I've lived. I've lived
a lot of places. I movedaround a lot, but always fairly small
(12:39):
towns except for like Kansas City andnow Tucson. I guess is kind of
a kind of like a small town. Yeah, I mean it's structured.
I feel like a small town,but you know, we're large now.
But so if somebody asked you whereyou grew up, which one I would
stacations, I would say California.Okay, southern California. That's a good
(13:01):
place to be for Honestly, Idon't know that i've grown up yet,
so maybe Arizona finishing up here.What are the hardest challenges or a hardest
challenge you've had to overcome in yourlife. What's one of the challenges.
Wow, I've had a few,for real, but uh, I think
probably the most recent has been Idon't mean to bring everybody down but clinical
(13:26):
depression bringing down a lot of depressionout there. Yeah, oh Christ,
clinical depression with the side of ADHD. You know, it's a good combination,
you know. I mean, Ithink, isn't it ADHD? There
are a lot of that depression isa part of that too. I think
a lot of people associate ADHD withlike being hyper all the time, and
(13:50):
that has pretty much one of theleast things, maybe in children, but
you know, adults with ADHD,it's really not like that. I didn't
I didn't have I didn't take medicationfor a long time, and then God,
I started taking medication a few yearsago. But it's made a huge
difference in my life. I mean, I spent twenty nineteen in bed,
(14:13):
so I'm sharing a pretty deep andvery big obstacle. Like I couldn't get
out of bed to go to workor apply for a job, or even
take a shower. There were daysit was really quite intense. My husband,
God love him, I mean Ido like he took such good care
(14:35):
of me, and he was reallyscared for a long time, because you
know, what do you do withsomebody that just can't doesn't have enough energy
or will to survive, to getout of bed. I will tell you
that what I did get out ofthat is I know about got fifty foods
that you can eat lying down withoutchewing. So yeah, it is.
(14:58):
You know, I always try to, always do try to extract the positives,
and that's one of them. Tapiocapudding very good, very good source
of protein and sugar and yeah,very little chewing involved. Yeah, you
can just sort of slurp it outof a big straw and lay down and
eat it like that. So there'sothers. If anybody's interested, go ahead
(15:22):
and DM me right in and I'llgive you the fifty fifty flat face foods.
That's what I would call them,because you can eat them on a
flat face. I know that depression, I mean you and I both know.
You know, depression is something thatdoes consume people's lives, and you
know they're the stigma mental illness.And while we play around with it on
(15:45):
this show a bit, but thestigma has definitely starting to go away a
little bit more and more every day, I think with all these different resources
that have come out, and thereare a lot of people that deal with
mental illness or depress anxiety, andwe really ought to continue to make progress
and that people, you know,it's recognized that, you know, people
(16:07):
do need help, and they needto take care of their mental health,
you know, just like we takecare of our regular health, our physical
health or you know, aches andpains our brains. They go through a
lot, they do, ye AndI'll tell you like mental illness is.
You know, there's still quite astigma. People are afraid to talk about
it at work because you know,if people find out that you suffer from
(16:32):
depression or if you're on medication forany sort of mental illness, they might
not put you on certain projects.Or the worst part is when they go,
oh are you okay with that?And it's like, you know,
I'm not a freak of nature,like I can. I can still handle
things and process the world and otherthings that come towards me, like I
just do it differently. Lexipro isa lifesaver for me. Yeah, And
(16:56):
there's so many treatments like oh yeah, like I said it, it's not
something that we should all we shouldbe ashamed of. And so I'm really
you know, and you're a goodexample of somebody who went through that came
out of it. You still I'mnot saying that you're perfect and that you
don't deal with things on a dailybasis. You're saying that perfect, but
(17:19):
you know what I mean, Like, I'm sure just like all of us,
we all deal with different things everyday. So overcoming that is a
really is a really cool thing.I mean, it's a really amazing thing
that you get to share with peoplewho might not understand or recognize that you
can do that, and also thatthose things are happening to a lot of
people right And I would like tojust say if anybody is listening who might
(17:42):
be struggling or know somebody who isdealing with depression or mental illness. I
stayed in my house, and I'mnot kidding. If I went out,
If I went out like once amonth, it was a lot. I
lived around the corner from a grocerystore I was ordering in and people were
like, you know, the storesright there, Like honestly, it's it
(18:06):
was less of a walk than youknow, walking out to my kitchen to
dial and order food. But Icouldn't do it. So and then on
the days when I felt like maybeI can, maybe I can get up
and go out, you know,I was like, Oh, then I'll
have to take a shower and I'llhave to put on clothes. So I
would just encourage people like, dowhat you can, and for other people
(18:29):
around, don't judge. Like ifyou see somebody at the grocery store in
sweatpants with dirty hair and a oversizedsweater gray was my collar and perhaps ug
boots, just know that they mightnot always look like that, and they
really just needed some white bread andBen and Jerry's and that's the best they
(18:53):
could do that day. And sojust go, go and do the best
you can and hopefully you have peoplearound you like I did. That's that's
the thing is when people suffer insilence and they suffer alone. You know,
I'm fortunate to have a loving familyand friends like you and others that
(19:14):
were like, hey, you know, are you doing okay today? You
know, talking about it is helpful, but some people don't want to.
Everybody deals with but it's always goodto check in on your people. And
even if they're not your people,go ahead and check in. It's better
for somebody to go mind your ownfucking business than to not check in and
then have to deal with something differentworse. Yeah, Absolutely, that's what
(19:37):
that's what I have to say,like just check in, and it is
annoying. It is very annoying forthe person who's in there in the in
the pool of mental illness, ifthey're like swimming around in it every day.
They don't want people checking on themnecessarily, but they need exactly Yeah,
yeah, yeah, awesome. Allright, So I'm gonna go a
different route here now. Oh good, because that was really a That's not
(20:00):
a bummer. It was a goodstory. It's something you know that you
should be proud of that you're ableto kind of overcome those things on a
daily basis and share your story.So nothing bumming me about that. Okay,
all right, So what goals areyou pursuing right now? What are
some things that you're doing right nowthat personal or work whatever? Proud to
(20:23):
say, not a goddamn thing.I have no goals. I pretty much
achieved everything I want to in life. Actually, no, Okay, So
I do have some goals. Okay, So I do think there's a lot
more for me to accomplish in mycareer. I have. I feel I
(20:44):
feel pretty accomplished, but I knowthere's more because we care for people and
there's always more to do and betterways to do it. So that's one
of my goals is to be thebest in my field. I also really
would like to get my house puttogether before the end of December. And
also just my personal health journey.I've had a few setbacks being sick recently
(21:07):
and moving and like stress and allof that. But I'm back and I
feel like I need to get backinto yoga, and yeah, that's just
like that's not going to be mypersonal journey forever. I feel so much
better when I'm actively involved in yogaat least twice a week. I love
it and I feel good physically andemotionally. So that's that's a big goal.
(21:32):
And you can add goals. That'sthe cool thing about goals. Yeah,
you could do something and add toit and yeah, and if you're
if you're not achieving it, youcan always just say it wasn't that important
anyway. And that's wasn't really agoal. It wasn't really a goal.
It was just maybe a thought.I was thinking maybe it would be a
goal, but I you see,I didn't write it down anywhere. That's
(21:55):
always something you can do. Talka little bit more about your career,
what got you here. I don'tthink anybody really knows what you do,
Carmen, and like outside of smalltown usay, what what are you doing
on a nine to five or eightyfive? I guess you could. I'm
a health and Human service administrator,so I operate homes in the community for
(22:22):
people with developmental disabilities and mental healthissues. We this is something that I've
been passionate about my whole life sinceI was a little girl. When I
was a little girl, I remembergoing to a nursing home and they're playing
this old out of key piano andeverybody was dancing, and I hugged this
lady and she said, do thatto all of them, and it touched
(22:45):
me. I was ten years old. I remember it clearly. It it
made me emotional and it stuck withme. And I remember the impact I
had as a small child just bybeing having conversation and being near these people
in this nursing home. And sothat was something that I always I always
(23:06):
loved. I loved helping people,being able to assist somebody who has you
know, other people have kind ofgiven up on in living by themselves or
having a boyfriend or a girlfriend ora husband, or wife. You know,
I don't know why the hell theywould want that sometimes, but honestly,
like this is, these are thingsthat you know, there's a lot
(23:26):
of homes for people with disabilities,there's a lot of progress for people with
disabilities. But it has been justrecently that people are acknowledging that people with
mental health issues and people with intellectualdisabilities also have the same feelings as you
and I and would want to bein relationships. So anything I can do
(23:48):
to help people get closer to theirown personal goals or their own dreams and
desires, I that's what I liketo do. So I currently have run
a program for in the community forpeople with disabilities, and I work with
some really great people who are likeminded. I really believe in the possibilities.
So that's that's what I do.Yeah, and that's not an easy
(24:11):
task. I mean, think ofall the people that need help. I
mean, I know you help peoplewith developmental disabilities, and that's kind of
like the primary role in the currentplace you are. But I know that
you have a passion for basically anybodywho needs that type of stability, and
not just people who are the mentallydisabled or you know, what I mean,
(24:33):
like like, for instance, homelessness, you know, mental illnesses,
you know, people who are outon the street. I mean, I
can't tell you how many times Garvinand I have been driving in the streets
of Tucson and she sees somebody onthe side of the road and is like
the only one concerned that that personis not awake, you know, on
the side of the road and pullsover and actually like like says, hey,
(24:57):
do you need help? Are youalive? Like you know, like
there's so many people driving by onthe road, on the streets that you
know, she's the one who's pullingover and making sure that person's okay.
She notices the people around her,and so it's not just the population.
I mean, I'm just I wantedto go ahead and explain because I know
(25:18):
you have a passion for anybody whoneeds absolutely in those services, you know,
helping people, and even though Iknow it's not something that the law
really loves, you know, itfeeds the people who need feed, who
need to be fed to give Ithink herself, it's important to see people,
you know, and see them wherethey are, Like, yeah,
it's uncomfortable, you know, I'vebeen down at that park, and sometimes
(25:41):
it's uncomfortable. It's hard to seepeople in such poor health. It's hard
to see people with so little.But we have to we have to see
people. We have to acknowledge this, and that's the first step in kind
of improving our society. Because thereare some I mean, that could be
me, that could be my brother, I could be you know, and
(26:04):
I would want somebody to stop.I would want somebody to make sure that
I'm still breathing. You know.Maybe I'm just taking a nap on the
sidewalk, but you know, Icould have also fallen in to hit my
head. So please check on me. If you see me on the streets.
I will I will thank you,Jessica, I might say from my
car. I might still be inmy car, but I'll ride down my
window and I'll make sure you're alive Carmen. That would be great,
(26:26):
that you're great. Okay, Sowhat is the most embarrassing moment of your
life so far? God, there'sbeen so many, you know, I
was thinking about this question in myhead before I asked it. I thought,
what the heck would I even say? I don't even know, But
what's something that comes up. Itdoesn't have to be the most embarrassing,
just something you want to share.Well, I was getting a colonoscopy and
(26:51):
they were prepping me. They wereprepping me for my to put the tube
up my butt, and they giveyou some medication to relax you, and
it's very, very potent. Andare you talking about this sedative before the
(27:11):
anesthesia? Okay, they gave mewhatever it was. I'm gonna tell you
what. Could not stop flirting withthe doctor, realizing the whole time my
naked butt was out and there verywell could have been a tube sticking out
of my ass. But I waslike scandalously flirting with him. He was
(27:33):
so cute, and I'm like,what are you doing after? And I'm
just like up in my gown,like on the bed, you know,
face down, ass up, andI'm just like, are you married?
I asked it for drinks after thething, and he's like yeah, yeah,
and it all seems so regular andnormal, and then I went out,
(27:56):
you know, boot boop boop.I'm out. Soon as I woke
up from that, I remembered everything, yeah, without the haze of the
medication, and I'm like, ohmy god, I've got to get out
of here. And I was franticallytrying to get my shit together, and
the nurse was like, you needto lay down, you need to lay
down, and I'm like, whereare my clothes? I gotta go.
She's like, you can't leave yet. The doctor needs to come and chuck
(28:18):
on you. And I'm like,I can't. I got things to do,
and I was. I was justpanic stricken. And I was also
thirsty from having a tube down mythroat. Oh sure, yeah, yeah,
and I wonder if the tube ismet in the middle. But anyway,
I couldn't have anything to drink.I could only have ice chips,
but I was chopping ice like crazy, and I projectile vomited straight cold water
(28:41):
out of my mouth from all theice chips. Oh my god. That
was a pretty embarrassing day. Yeah. I mean, at least you had
the explanation of like I was drugged, you know what I mean. You
could just say like, I don'tknow what to do, I don't know
what to say. I was.I was droll. But they say,
like, your real personality comes outyour inhibitions a lessons. Yeah. Yeah,
(29:07):
So basically, when I'm under theinfluence, I'm a I'm a saucy
slut whatever. Oh my god,that's funny. He was very cute.
Well some of them are, butyou know what, it reminds me of
what I was having, like Seinfeldflashbacks and you were talking about your but
hanging out. Do you remember theepisode the license plate of the the doctor
(29:32):
what what is the proctologist? Ibelieve he's a practologist, but his license
plate said ass man. You don'tremember that, No, no, go
back. You need to watch theepisode at Seinfeld where they talk about the
ass man. That's a good licenseplate though a man. Yeah, who
(29:53):
is your celebrity crush off the topof your head? Can be one or
two? Dave Letterman. You've saidthat before, and I just don't really
really Hell yeah, David Letterman.I love him before when I said about
him that you love. I thinkhe's brilliant. I think he probably I
(30:15):
don't know. He's tall, uhhuh. I think he's handsome. Yeah,
he's smart, he's funny, helooks good in boots and jeans.
I would imagine he's uh a satisfactorylover. I don't know, but well,
I don't know. I didn't wantto explain all that but I loved
(30:40):
I love Norm McDonald. I wouldhave married him in a second. Oh
my god again, gorgeous, smart, funny, very understated. He is
like a slow talking country boy,but he is brilliant, absolutely brilliant,
and I recognizable voices both of those. Oh my god. Yes, So
(31:00):
I love that. I love Imean, the easy choice, Lenny Kravitz.
I don't think I should tell youwhy. I don't think. I
don't think anybody needs explanation as towhy I would want to, you know,
go out with Lenny Kravitz. Butwell, you know what, I
don't think people expected David Letterman.Okay, So I've loved David Letterman since
(31:21):
I was a little kid. Iremember seeing his show on TV during the
day. This is how old,This is how long my crush for David
Letterman has been. When I wasa kid, I remember seeing David Letterman.
He had a daytime show for notvery long. My mom didn't like
watching it because she said he wasstupid. But I was little and I
thought he was awesome. I thoughthe was funny even when I was a
kid, and I just liked hisface. Now I love him with a
(31:45):
beer too. I just I wouldlike to have a David Letterman, Levy
Lenny Kravitz sandwich. I don't evenknow how that would happen. Shut up,
Okay, all right, what isyour Okay, this is really loaded.
Okay, So you just get topick one thing, all right,
Okay, one thing. What isyour spiciest opinion that most people disagree with?
(32:07):
Oh my gosh, I know Idon't want to it. I don't
want to be canced. Listen,I am. I am a spicy spice
baby. I'm full of spicy opinions. I know. That's how I said
you have to pick, like youhad to pick one or some you know
something you want to share. Okay, I'll tell you this, since I
(32:29):
brought up the cancel I think thecancel culture is bullshit. I think people
do dumb things, people do badthings. The people who do the worst
things get away with it. Andthe people that said something in eighty nine
at a college party, or youknow, did something told the joke,
are being held prisoner and canceled forsomething that I probably would have laughed at
(32:52):
quite honestly, and probably still would. I think people are way too sensitive
and I understand that, you know, going back to the whole mental illness
thing. That's fine. If youare that sensitive and you're that sheltered,
you you are responsible for maintaining thatshelter, not the world. So I
(33:12):
think that that is just crazy.I despise people who want to talk to
the freaking manager. Oh my god, shut the nobody cares. Nobody cares
if your hash browns were just alittle bit too crunchy, or if your
coffee was not warm enough. Youknow, I think people who are making
your food and serving your food aredoing the best they can. And also
(33:34):
it's not an easy job, andI just think people need to mind their
own fucking business, That's what Ithink, and not try to cancel people
because they It's just I just don'tunderstand it. It's like basically people everywhere
tired and trying to take away somebody'swhole life because they told a joke you
didn't like. It's it's the worst, It's absolutely the worst. And it's
(33:57):
like, do we really want sucha sterile environ that if somebody looks at
you crazy, you're going to fallapart. I think that. I think
that also helps me in my inmy passion in my job, because you
know, you don't have to takeeverything personally, and Jessica, you know,
working in our field, but thingsthat people have said to me just
like you know, yeah, youcan go try to give somebody breakfast and
(34:22):
warm gothe and say good morning sir, and you might hear like words that
you've never imagined come out of somebody'smouth. But it's like, okay,
you know, still have a goodday. I'm not going to go and
try to take their sleeping bag awayand cancel them. It's just yeah,
no, So I believe that peoplewho think they're so important that they should
(34:42):
cancel other people, people that activelypursue the detriment of others are what I
would call an asshole. And thenyou know that, like I said,
and the people that do the worstthings get away with it. They don't
get canceled. And that would beanother spicy opinion. So I'm not even
going to get into you told meto pick one. Well, yeah,
(35:05):
you go down a spicy rabbit holeright now. Yeah, I think in
the future, you know the plan, we do have some plans for a
spicy spicy rabbit hole podcast. Maybethat's what we should call it. You
know, not to give too muchaway. Not to give too much away
just yet, but yeah, thefuture, we got something. Oh yeah,
has nothing to do with what hasnothing to do with painful colonoscopies,
(35:30):
the spicy rabbit hole. Maybe sometimesmaybe it does. Sometimes we might talk
about the Spicy rabbit Hole. Yeah, I can't wait for the new podcast.
That is something that I really ampassionate about. Also, that's a
good goal. That is a goodgoal. Yeah, that sucker off the
ground before, like right around thenew year. Perhaps. Oh yes,
(35:51):
yep, yep, it's been it'sbeen some time coming, but it's gonna
have it. It's gonna happen.Oh God, did you make me blush?
Jessica? I think I did.I think I did unintentionally for sure.
The first Usually it's Jessica is turningas red as the flowers on my
(36:15):
wall. Yep. And it's usuallyfairly, fairly easy, because Jessica is
the most innocent, sweet person you'llever meet in your life. For real,
Jessica, you are well wait tillyou interview me. I guess maybe
(36:35):
your opinion will change. Maybe youropinion will change. I don't think so,
Jessica. I've seen you in allkinds of situations, and every time
you surprise me at how truly gentleyou are. Oh, I am like,
you are making me blush. I'mready to strike people down with a
sword, and you're just like,oh, I don't know that he meant
it. Okay. Jessica's the sweetestand I love her. Okay, Oh
(37:01):
my god. So what do youthink about the phrase you are the sum
of the five people you spend themost time with. Am I the sum
or the average? No, youare. It's been It's like it's one
of the it's a fact that peopletend to be the sum of the five
people you spend the most time with. Yeah, I'm okay with that.
(37:22):
I think I surround myself with goodpeople. I've always heard it was the
average of the people, you know. So you add add all the people
up, and then you divide itby five and that's you. You get
the at you're the average of thefive people in your life. But I'm
still okay with that because I Ihave surrounded myself with some pretty extraordinary people
(37:44):
you included. Oh, thank you. So I'm okay with that. Yeah,
Yeah, I feel good about that. I know that there have been
times in my life where I wasjust like, oh my god, if
I wasn't in this friend group,you would all be zeros. But now
you're a ten. Thank you garment. But that's not the case now.
I think. I think it ebbsand flows. I think some days I'm
(38:07):
some days I'm the hundred, somedays I'm the ten. You know you
want to be around, You wantto surround yourself with the people who actually
care about you, care about yoursuccess is just as much as when you
are down. So right, Imean, so, I yeah, I
have I have a handful of friendsthat I've known a long time, but
(38:28):
not even a handful. I haveone friend I'm known for twenty five years.
Another I've known for a long time, and I would count you as
one of my good friends too.But people have seen me through some of
my toughest times and they still lovedme, And I've seen them through some
of their toughest times and there's stillthat love and encouragement and dedication to the
(38:52):
friendship or the relationship. Right,So, I think you're right, like,
when you're down and out, thelast thing you want to do is
be around people who really sort ofrelish in your pain, because there are
people who feed on that. Buttrue, a true friend, doesn't you
know, A true friend might crywith you and also like give you a
kick in the pants when you needit, encourage you. Yeah, so
(39:15):
exactly. Yeah, yeah. Yougotta surround yourself with people who you love
and people who love you. Ithink this is the last question for you,
Carmen, for right now, forright okay, okay, I know
there's way more to Carmen then wecan get through in just one episode.
I don't know, maybe maybe not. If you had the attention of the
(39:37):
whole world for five minutes, whatwould you say, you mean, I
don't have the attention to that.If I have the attention to the whole
world, what would I say?I would say. Treat each other as
you wish to be treated, Bekind, love each other. You don't
have to spend time, You don'thave to hang out with people, but
(39:59):
just respect who they are. Mindyour own business. If you can't,
like say something nice, just bundyour own business and just love each other.
Lift people up. Also, talkmore, talk more to people you
know you never know, like howyou've how you could possibly change a person's
life just by acknowledging them and givingthem your time for a few moments at
(40:21):
the grocery store. Mm hmmm.So I would just encourage people to if
you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. And
I have to I have to likerepeat that to myself several times because you
know, I get a little spicy. You talked about the cancel culture is
being kind of like you're one ofyour first spicy topics, right, thinking
(40:43):
that came to your mind first thing, and that just it's so true,
Like why are we canceling them outjust because at this moment in their life
when they had this whole lifetime andthen maybe they have another whole life ahead
of them. That's that's more positive. So why are we canceling that part
out and make their whole life miserablebecause of it? Well, don't say
anything, is kind of what you'resaying is like, hey be kind,
(41:06):
let's remember that we're all human,right, I mean, back to cancel
culture, Like it pisses me off. If I get like a crabby pizza,
we'll say that, right, Butyou know I have to You also
have to look at yourself and gowas it me? Was it? Because
I was feeling sick, and Iexpected this pizza to line my esophagus with
gold. I don't know, Idon't know, but you know, like,
(41:29):
but the last thing you want todo, Like, why would you
want to put somebody's business in jeopardybecause of one crappy pizza? Yeah,
Like, the world has a wayof working those things out naturally. You
know, if the pizza is reallycrappy, don't go back there. Go
somewhere else. You know, otherpeople might really enjoy that crappy pizza.
(41:50):
But you know, I don't haveto go there. I don't have to
go there. I don't have togive my business. But I certainly also
do not need to just trash thisplace and I put several people out of
work because of my opinion. Itry to stay out of the rabbit holes
of social media, but somebody mightjust say, like, hey, does
anybody hear this one thing in theneighborhood last night? And you have all
(42:14):
these people commenting, and all ofa sudden it gets into this discussion of
like gun and control. Somehow itturns into all these other political things,
and you're like, what the heck? All I wanted to do is get
some advice on you know what todo about these kids ringing my doorbell at
midnight? Fine, you know what, maybe I won't ask for help next
(42:34):
time, right, because, Oh, I think people like this social media.
You know, it's made it soeasy for people to just sort of
purge themselves of all sorts of negativefeelings and without putting a face to it.
You know, it's very easy.It's just a little device in your
hand. It seems so harmless.People say gruesome, disgusting things about other
people that you know, quite franklyshouldn't be sun. I think people need
(42:58):
to mind their own business, standtheir own lane, but be kind.
Like, if you're gonna say something, make it uplifting. It takes a
second to do it. And honestly, like little kids, people don't realize
the little kids have so much stressand anxiety already. Like you remember being
a kid, remember that, youknow, Like we didn't have strawberry pop
tarts. I'm gonna have a fuckingmeltdown like I needed. We only have
(43:22):
what the brown chicker? That's theworst, right, Yeah, ioever invented
those? It hates children second,So you know, like strawberry pop tarts
And then like you get my momused to buy the box like the big
one, and there was always thatvariety, and then there was the one
without frosting. Were oh, yeah, what the heck, what the heck?
(43:44):
Right, kept putting it in theback, and then one day,
you know, here's the one withoutfrosting. And Okay, my day is
already starting off shitty, and nowI have to go to school and deal
with some people who don't like myleg warmers. Okay, I'm dating myself
right now, but whatever. Yeah, I were warmers to school. I
remember, I remember the leggings thathad the hooks underneath the well. Yeah,
(44:09):
and uh you know they never rodeup, not let leggings normally do.
Anyways, it's hard to but youknow what happens if you're like tall,
or you have any amount of buttat all. Oh okay, yeah
sure, yeah, then you getcrotch a lot. Yesich is so uncomfortable.
I would much rather have high watersthan sagging crotch. Yeah, So
(44:32):
I will end my I'm I donewith my I will end on be kind.
Yes, it takes practice, becauseit's so easy just pop off,
especially for somebody like me. I'vegot tons of quick, sharp tongue.
Things to say, But and ittakes more time to think of the kind
and better version of that. SoI would just ask everybody to try.
(44:53):
Oh and if if the world isstill listening, they are everybody. Everybody
sent me one doll us so Ican get what so we could continue our
work on the streets of the world. I'm mystery. Sorry, it's lucky.
We're going on the street so wecould continue our work on the streets.
(45:13):
More than a dollar? Why youcan't get anything for a dollar?
No, ILL show you my ariolafor a dollar. Why? Why wouldn't
I show my ariola for a dollar? No? Why do we have to
say that word ariola? Yeah,I don't know, it's weird. Thanks
(45:37):
everyone for joining us today on smallTown USA. You want to hear more
small Town hit subscribe now go ahead, all wait. Make sure you check
out the links in the description ofthis podcast for our Twitter and Instagram accounts.
Don't miss your exit like, shareand follow us now now leaving small
Town USA. Small Town USA isa production of nineteen Media Group. If
(46:05):
you would like to feature your smalltown in an episode or have suggestion for
future shows, follow us on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter at small Town USA
Show, Thank you for joining us, and come again real soon.
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USA walkers for Charley. Hello,Jessica Cars, Happy anniversary. Yes,
(02:38):
it's two years, it's been Ican't believe it's been two years already.
It's crazy, that's crazy. Wewere babies. We would be walking
Yeah, you would be almost sayingfull sentences. Yeah, and let's just
clarify it's small town's anniversary, notours. Oh yeah, yeah, Jessica
(02:59):
and I'm not couple. How wasyour Thanksgiving? Our house ended up being
a bunch of sickies this last twoweeks, so we did still feel well
enough at the time to go tomy mother's house and celebrate Thanksgiving, and
we were a little bougie. Wedidn't do traditional turkey because you know what,
(03:19):
I think I realized last year andwe kind of talked about it that
I don't really love turkey and alsoI don't love eating it afterwards for like
three days. So we're like,you know what, let's do something different.
Let's just do the things we liketo eat and bring it together.
How is yours? How is yourThanksgiving? It was, well, I've
been sick for like a month.Yeah, came down with the COVID again.
(03:42):
It's like every Thanksgiving or every otherThanksgiving. I don't know. At
this point, it's like whatever.But we were really sick. My mom
was sick, my husband got sick. We were testing negative, and we
were so psyched because my sweet nephewwas coming for Thanksgiving. That's a tradition.
Yeah, and he was excited becausehe hasn't had a great year.
He was carving the turkey and tooka big bite and started choking. He
(04:08):
could breathe, but it was adeep choke. It was in a esophagy
blockage, so he kind of slowpanicked, if that makes sense. Yeah,
you know, he's trying to hideit in. And then finally he
was like, yeah, I thinkI'm gonna go to the hospital. So
he went over to a local hospitaland they had to put him under and
do an extraction and pull all thefood out, and the doctor was bitter.
(04:30):
The doctor was like, there wasmore than turkey in there. He's
like, I'm sure there was,you know. Okay, you know,
it's not like you have to reportthis to the police or anything, but
yeah, ok, there's also probablysome salami and cheese in there. But
then my husband started feeling weird andI thought we were gonna have to take
him, but instead the neighbor,my old neighbor, because I moved recently,
(04:54):
right and my old neighbor, whois a woman who suffers from mental
illness, are actually not so muchher as much as other people suffer from
her mental illness. Me mostly shewalked into our old house which we're renting,
and their dog bit her on herfoot, Oh my god, resulting
(05:15):
in stitches. But by the timeI got over there to attend to her,
she had her foot in a plasticbag that was filled with blood.
She's like, You're like, ohyeah, but she loved the fireman.
Oh my gosh. She lied,she said she told them that she was
a bawd lowdowncer for thirty years andshe thought they were admiring her legs.
(05:36):
So when I went back to checkon her the next day, I had
to go pick her up at thehospital too. She went by ambulance,
so I was at two different hospitalson Thanksgiving. Oh my god. So
by the time I got home,I was just like, fuck Thanksgiving.
My poor nephew though he loves Thanksgivingdinner, that's like his favorite thing,
and he didn't even get to eat. And then he came home from the
(05:58):
hospital and all he could do washow of like liquids. So we're trying
really hard to make mashed potatoes andgravy as liquidy as possible but still appetizing.
Yeah right, yeah, yeah,And we got creative. I like,
have some nice chicken and stars,buddy, but everybody. Everybody's okay
now, and overall it was areally good day. The turkey was delicious,
(06:20):
and I do love a turkey sandwich, but I don't put cranberries and
stuff on it. I just liketurkey and mayo and salt and pepper on
a toasted whole wheat and seed bread. This is really bad timing to me,
but basically on Tuesday, I hadsome dental work done and had been
putting it off for a long timejust because I you know, nobody really
(06:41):
loves dental work, and it wasI had to get a crown like weigh
in the back one of my molers. It took forever. I was in
there for four hours because it wassuch a difficult spot for them to get
to. Even though it was numb, I couldn't feel the actual things happening,
but my jaw and everything was justso thore. And then obviously like
(07:02):
you're up you know where, theyput in the injections of sore the next
day. So when I got outof the out of the dentist, they
had numbed me so well. Mywhole right face, like my whole right
side of my face was like frozenlike botox, and like if I couldn't
(07:24):
like Harley blink really because it wasso nut yes, And so what would
happen is I would be like Ilook myself in the mirror after for like
the whole day, the rest ofthe day, I would look at myself
in the mirror and I'd start laughing, but only one side of my face
would smile. The other side waslike browning, this crooked, like look
like this. I'll send you avideo. I don't know if you and
(07:45):
the then the harder you laugh,the worse it looks. Because I could
be like open mouth and my faceis just silent crickets on one side.
That's how people would I know.I know, yes, I'm aware.
We're not making fun of people.We're not making fun of it, you
(08:07):
know, it's just like having symptomssymptoms of it. Yeah, oh my
gosh. But anyways, it wasa couple days before Thanksgiving and a couple
of days after. Man, thatwas soa Even though we had this really
nice U dinner, it was hardfor me to get through because I just
could not. So Carmen, Ithink you know, since it's our anniversary,
(08:30):
our podcast anniversary, I don't thinkwe've ever done anything to kind of
talk about who we are anything aboutourselves. We don't our listeners don't really
know too much about us in general. So I wanted to just take the
time today and another episode. Sotoday we're gonna just quiz and interview you
(08:50):
as our guest, or I willtake the time to interview Carvin today because
I mean, these are kind offun questions or not anything too deep and
you could bring up on and it'stoo deep by Jose, I'll decline,
but read on Jessica. Okay,so first question is how are you doing
today? For real? I'm hangingin there above average, but I don't
(09:16):
know. I mean, I'm okay. I've got work stuff going on and
you know, family stuff, butI'm better than average. Okay, that's
fair. Yeah, So what hasbeen going on in your life recently that
you expect, you expected, orthat you didn't expect. Well, at
my Thanksgiving there were a lot ofunexpected surprises there, yes, yep.
(09:37):
But uh also we I lived inmy old house for many years and we
never had a problem with a mouse. But when we were moving, we
discovered a mouse in the dog toys. So it ran away. We packed
everything up. We got to thenew house. I was cleaning out the
dog toys and there was the mouse, and it ran and it got in
(10:00):
a dogbed. So we took thedogbed out and we'd let the mouse go
outside, but I think he gotback in. And this is not expected
and it's certainly not well received inmy house. A mouse. I love
animals outside, but I do notwant a mouse in my house, certainly
in my sofa or my dog toys. I don't want. I don't want
(10:20):
a mouse in the house. Mousein the house. That is pretty unexpected
and also really disturbing. My momis still standing on a table because my
mom moved in with us, andshe's still up on the dining room table.
I can't get her down. Sothat seems like it's something that was
expected. Your mom moving in withyou. Oh, yes, yes,
(10:41):
I'm going that's going really well.It's been good for both of us.
Yeah. I like your mom.That's awesome. She tells it like it
is. She sure does. That'sgood. Yeah, I'm glad to hear
that. I'm glad to hear that. Okay, so kind of random question,
what is your favorite me? Like, what's your favorite thing to eat?
(11:01):
You like a lot of stuff.I'm that way too. I don't
know if I could pinpoint something,But what if you had what's the first
thing comes to your mind? Likewhen I say what's your favorite meal?
You know, I love anything Ilove. I love Italian food mm hmm.
But I also love tacos. Iwould have to say my all time
favorite food is a variety of tacos, especially out here. Oh yeah,
(11:26):
yeah, that's a good stuff heretoo, So yeah, yeah, all
right, So this question is alittle bigger, so you you decide where
to start. But so, Carmen, where are you from? I am
from Ancorage, Alaska. I wasborn in Anchorage, Alaska, but then
shortly after my birth, I movedto Wyoming. From Wyoming to Colorado,
(11:52):
where I stayed for a long time, well several years anyway, and then
Missouri, Kansas City, Missouri,which was a big town, a big
town. I lived in small smalltowns up until then Kansas City, Missouri,
even though Ray Town was like ait's a suburb of Kansas City,
and it's small. They all runtogether, as you know, like it's
like any big city you've got likethese tiny named towns that are all actually
(12:16):
part of a much bigger metropolis.Back to Wyoming, back to Colorado,
from Colorado to a small town inCalifornia. Back to Colorado and oh Elko,
Nevada. I lived there. I'msure I'm missing some places. And
then Flagstaff, Arizona, and nowTucson. So I've lived. I've lived
a lot of places. I movedaround a lot, but always fairly small
(12:39):
towns except for like Kansas City andnow Tucson. I guess is kind of
a kind of like a small town. Yeah, I mean it's structured.
I feel like a small town,but you know, we're large now.
But so if somebody asked you whereyou grew up, which one I would
stacations, I would say California.Okay, southern California. That's a good
(13:01):
place to be for Honestly, Idon't know that i've grown up yet,
so maybe Arizona finishing up here.What are the hardest challenges or a hardest
challenge you've had to overcome in yourlife. What's one of the challenges.
Wow, I've had a few,for real, but uh, I think
probably the most recent has been Idon't mean to bring everybody down but clinical
(13:26):
depression bringing down a lot of depressionout there. Yeah, oh Christ,
clinical depression with the side of ADHD. You know, it's a good combination,
you know. I mean, Ithink, isn't it ADHD? There
are a lot of that depression isa part of that too. I think
a lot of people associate ADHD withlike being hyper all the time, and
(13:50):
that has pretty much one of theleast things, maybe in children, but
you know, adults with ADHD,it's really not like that. I didn't
I didn't have I didn't take medicationfor a long time, and then God,
I started taking medication a few yearsago. But it's made a huge
difference in my life. I mean, I spent twenty nineteen in bed,
(14:13):
so I'm sharing a pretty deep andvery big obstacle. Like I couldn't get
out of bed to go to workor apply for a job, or even
take a shower. There were daysit was really quite intense. My husband,
God love him, I mean Ido like he took such good care
(14:35):
of me, and he was reallyscared for a long time, because you
know, what do you do withsomebody that just can't doesn't have enough energy
or will to survive, to getout of bed. I will tell you
that what I did get out ofthat is I know about got fifty foods
that you can eat lying down withoutchewing. So yeah, it is.
(14:58):
You know, I always try to, always do try to extract the positives,
and that's one of them. Tapiocapudding very good, very good source
of protein and sugar and yeah,very little chewing involved. Yeah, you
can just sort of slurp it outof a big straw and lay down and
eat it like that. So there'sothers. If anybody's interested, go ahead
(15:22):
and DM me right in and I'llgive you the fifty fifty flat face foods.
That's what I would call them,because you can eat them on a
flat face. I know that depression, I mean you and I both know.
You know, depression is something thatdoes consume people's lives, and you
know they're the stigma mental illness.And while we play around with it on
(15:45):
this show a bit, but thestigma has definitely starting to go away a
little bit more and more every day, I think with all these different resources
that have come out, and thereare a lot of people that deal with
mental illness or depress anxiety, andwe really ought to continue to make progress
and that people, you know,it's recognized that, you know, people
(16:07):
do need help, and they needto take care of their mental health,
you know, just like we takecare of our regular health, our physical
health or you know, aches andpains our brains. They go through a
lot, they do, ye AndI'll tell you like mental illness is.
You know, there's still quite astigma. People are afraid to talk about
it at work because you know,if people find out that you suffer from
(16:32):
depression or if you're on medication forany sort of mental illness, they might
not put you on certain projects.Or the worst part is when they go,
oh are you okay with that?And it's like, you know,
I'm not a freak of nature,like I can. I can still handle
things and process the world and otherthings that come towards me, like I
just do it differently. Lexipro isa lifesaver for me. Yeah, And
(16:56):
there's so many treatments like oh yeah, like I said it, it's not
something that we should all we shouldbe ashamed of. And so I'm really
you know, and you're a goodexample of somebody who went through that came
out of it. You still I'mnot saying that you're perfect and that you
don't deal with things on a dailybasis. You're saying that perfect, but
(17:19):
you know what I mean, Like, I'm sure just like all of us,
we all deal with different things everyday. So overcoming that is a
really is a really cool thing.I mean, it's a really amazing thing
that you get to share with peoplewho might not understand or recognize that you
can do that, and also thatthose things are happening to a lot of
people right And I would like tojust say if anybody is listening who might
(17:42):
be struggling or know somebody who isdealing with depression or mental illness. I
stayed in my house, and I'mnot kidding. If I went out,
If I went out like once amonth, it was a lot. I
lived around the corner from a grocerystore I was ordering in and people were
like, you know, the storesright there, Like honestly, it's it
(18:06):
was less of a walk than youknow, walking out to my kitchen to
dial and order food. But Icouldn't do it. So and then on
the days when I felt like maybeI can, maybe I can get up
and go out, you know,I was like, Oh, then I'll
have to take a shower and I'llhave to put on clothes. So I
would just encourage people like, dowhat you can, and for other people
(18:29):
around, don't judge. Like ifyou see somebody at the grocery store in
sweatpants with dirty hair and a oversizedsweater gray was my collar and perhaps ug
boots, just know that they mightnot always look like that, and they
really just needed some white bread andBen and Jerry's and that's the best they
(18:53):
could do that day. And sojust go, go and do the best
you can and hopefully you have peoplearound you like I did. That's that's
the thing is when people suffer insilence and they suffer alone. You know,
I'm fortunate to have a loving familyand friends like you and others that
(19:14):
were like, hey, you know, are you doing okay today? You
know, talking about it is helpful, but some people don't want to.
Everybody deals with but it's always goodto check in on your people. And
even if they're not your people,go ahead and check in. It's better
for somebody to go mind your ownfucking business than to not check in and
then have to deal with something differentworse. Yeah, Absolutely, that's what
(19:37):
that's what I have to say,like just check in, and it is
annoying. It is very annoying forthe person who's in there in the in
the pool of mental illness, ifthey're like swimming around in it every day.
They don't want people checking on themnecessarily, but they need exactly Yeah,
yeah, yeah, awesome. Allright, So I'm gonna go a
different route here now. Oh good, because that was really a That's not
(20:00):
a bummer. It was a goodstory. It's something you know that you
should be proud of that you're ableto kind of overcome those things on a
daily basis and share your story.So nothing bumming me about that. Okay,
all right, So what goals areyou pursuing right now? What are
some things that you're doing right nowthat personal or work whatever? Proud to
(20:23):
say, not a goddamn thing.I have no goals. I pretty much
achieved everything I want to in life. Actually, no, Okay, So
I do have some goals. Okay, So I do think there's a lot
more for me to accomplish in mycareer. I have. I feel I
(20:44):
feel pretty accomplished, but I knowthere's more because we care for people and
there's always more to do and betterways to do it. So that's one
of my goals is to be thebest in my field. I also really
would like to get my house puttogether before the end of December. And
also just my personal health journey.I've had a few setbacks being sick recently
(21:07):
and moving and like stress and allof that. But I'm back and I
feel like I need to get backinto yoga, and yeah, that's just
like that's not going to be mypersonal journey forever. I feel so much
better when I'm actively involved in yogaat least twice a week. I love
it and I feel good physically andemotionally. So that's that's a big goal.
(21:32):
And you can add goals. That'sthe cool thing about goals. Yeah,
you could do something and add toit and yeah, and if you're
if you're not achieving it, youcan always just say it wasn't that important
anyway. And that's wasn't really agoal. It wasn't really a goal.
It was just maybe a thought.I was thinking maybe it would be a
goal, but I you see,I didn't write it down anywhere. That's
(21:55):
always something you can do. Talka little bit more about your career,
what got you here. I don'tthink anybody really knows what you do,
Carmen, and like outside of smalltown usay, what what are you doing
on a nine to five or eightyfive? I guess you could. I'm
a health and Human service administrator,so I operate homes in the community for
(22:22):
people with developmental disabilities and mental healthissues. We this is something that I've
been passionate about my whole life sinceI was a little girl. When I
was a little girl, I remembergoing to a nursing home and they're playing
this old out of key piano andeverybody was dancing, and I hugged this
lady and she said, do thatto all of them, and it touched
(22:45):
me. I was ten years old. I remember it clearly. It it
made me emotional and it stuck withme. And I remember the impact I
had as a small child just bybeing having conversation and being near these people
in this nursing home. And sothat was something that I always I always
(23:06):
loved. I loved helping people,being able to assist somebody who has you
know, other people have kind ofgiven up on in living by themselves or
having a boyfriend or a girlfriend ora husband, or wife. You know,
I don't know why the hell theywould want that sometimes, but honestly,
like this is, these are thingsthat you know, there's a lot
(23:26):
of homes for people with disabilities,there's a lot of progress for people with
disabilities. But it has been justrecently that people are acknowledging that people with
mental health issues and people with intellectualdisabilities also have the same feelings as you
and I and would want to bein relationships. So anything I can do
(23:48):
to help people get closer to theirown personal goals or their own dreams and
desires, I that's what I liketo do. So I currently have run
a program for in the community forpeople with disabilities, and I work with
some really great people who are likeminded. I really believe in the possibilities.
So that's that's what I do.Yeah, and that's not an easy
(24:11):
task. I mean, think ofall the people that need help. I
mean, I know you help peoplewith developmental disabilities, and that's kind of
like the primary role in the currentplace you are. But I know that
you have a passion for basically anybodywho needs that type of stability, and
not just people who are the mentallydisabled or you know, what I mean,
(24:33):
like like, for instance, homelessness, you know, mental illnesses,
you know, people who are outon the street. I mean, I
can't tell you how many times Garvinand I have been driving in the streets
of Tucson and she sees somebody onthe side of the road and is like
the only one concerned that that personis not awake, you know, on
the side of the road and pullsover and actually like like says, hey,
(24:57):
do you need help? Are youalive? Like you know, like
there's so many people driving by onthe road, on the streets that you
know, she's the one who's pullingover and making sure that person's okay.
She notices the people around her,and so it's not just the population.
I mean, I'm just I wantedto go ahead and explain because I know
(25:18):
you have a passion for anybody whoneeds absolutely in those services, you know,
helping people, and even though Iknow it's not something that the law
really loves, you know, itfeeds the people who need feed, who
need to be fed to give Ithink herself, it's important to see people,
you know, and see them wherethey are, Like, yeah,
it's uncomfortable, you know, I'vebeen down at that park, and sometimes
(25:41):
it's uncomfortable. It's hard to seepeople in such poor health. It's hard
to see people with so little.But we have to we have to see
people. We have to acknowledge this, and that's the first step in kind
of improving our society. Because thereare some I mean, that could be
me, that could be my brother, I could be you know, and
(26:04):
I would want somebody to stop.I would want somebody to make sure that
I'm still breathing. You know.Maybe I'm just taking a nap on the
sidewalk, but you know, Icould have also fallen in to hit my
head. So please check on me. If you see me on the streets.
I will I will thank you,Jessica, I might say from my
car. I might still be inmy car, but I'll ride down my
window and I'll make sure you're alive Carmen. That would be great,
(26:26):
that you're great. Okay, Sowhat is the most embarrassing moment of your
life so far? God, there'sbeen so many, you know, I
was thinking about this question in myhead before I asked it. I thought,
what the heck would I even say? I don't even know, But
what's something that comes up. Itdoesn't have to be the most embarrassing,
just something you want to share.Well, I was getting a colonoscopy and
(26:51):
they were prepping me. They wereprepping me for my to put the tube
up my butt, and they giveyou some medication to relax you, and
it's very, very potent. Andare you talking about this sedative before the
(27:11):
anesthesia? Okay, they gave mewhatever it was. I'm gonna tell you
what. Could not stop flirting withthe doctor, realizing the whole time my
naked butt was out and there verywell could have been a tube sticking out
of my ass. But I waslike scandalously flirting with him. He was
(27:33):
so cute, and I'm like,what are you doing after? And I'm
just like up in my gown,like on the bed, you know,
face down, ass up, andI'm just like, are you married?
I asked it for drinks after thething, and he's like yeah, yeah,
and it all seems so regular andnormal, and then I went out,
(27:56):
you know, boot boop boop.I'm out. Soon as I woke
up from that, I remembered everything, yeah, without the haze of the
medication, and I'm like, ohmy god, I've got to get out
of here. And I was franticallytrying to get my shit together, and
the nurse was like, you needto lay down, you need to lay
down, and I'm like, whereare my clothes? I gotta go.
She's like, you can't leave yet. The doctor needs to come and chuck
(28:18):
on you. And I'm like,I can't. I got things to do,
and I was. I was justpanic stricken. And I was also
thirsty from having a tube down mythroat. Oh sure, yeah, yeah,
and I wonder if the tube ismet in the middle. But anyway,
I couldn't have anything to drink.I could only have ice chips,
but I was chopping ice like crazy, and I projectile vomited straight cold water
(28:41):
out of my mouth from all theice chips. Oh my god. That
was a pretty embarrassing day. Yeah. I mean, at least you had
the explanation of like I was drugged, you know what I mean. You
could just say like, I don'tknow what to do, I don't know
what to say. I was.I was droll. But they say,
like, your real personality comes outyour inhibitions a lessons. Yeah. Yeah,
(29:07):
So basically, when I'm under theinfluence, I'm a I'm a saucy
slut whatever. Oh my god,that's funny. He was very cute.
Well some of them are, butyou know what, it reminds me of
what I was having, like Seinfeldflashbacks and you were talking about your but
hanging out. Do you remember theepisode the license plate of the the doctor
(29:32):
what what is the proctologist? Ibelieve he's a practologist, but his license
plate said ass man. You don'tremember that, No, no, go
back. You need to watch theepisode at Seinfeld where they talk about the
ass man. That's a good licenseplate though a man. Yeah, who
(29:53):
is your celebrity crush off the topof your head? Can be one or
two? Dave Letterman. You've saidthat before, and I just don't really
really Hell yeah, David Letterman.I love him before when I said about
him that you love. I thinkhe's brilliant. I think he probably I
(30:15):
don't know. He's tall, uhhuh. I think he's handsome. Yeah,
he's smart, he's funny, helooks good in boots and jeans.
I would imagine he's uh a satisfactorylover. I don't know, but well,
I don't know. I didn't wantto explain all that but I loved
(30:40):
I love Norm McDonald. I wouldhave married him in a second. Oh
my god again, gorgeous, smart, funny, very understated. He is
like a slow talking country boy,but he is brilliant, absolutely brilliant,
and I recognizable voices both of those. Oh my god. Yes, So
(31:00):
I love that. I love Imean, the easy choice, Lenny Kravitz.
I don't think I should tell youwhy. I don't think. I
don't think anybody needs explanation as towhy I would want to, you know,
go out with Lenny Kravitz. Butwell, you know what, I
don't think people expected David Letterman.Okay, So I've loved David Letterman since
(31:21):
I was a little kid. Iremember seeing his show on TV during the
day. This is how old,This is how long my crush for David
Letterman has been. When I wasa kid, I remember seeing David Letterman.
He had a daytime show for notvery long. My mom didn't like
watching it because she said he wasstupid. But I was little and I
thought he was awesome. I thoughthe was funny even when I was a
kid, and I just liked hisface. Now I love him with a
(31:45):
beer too. I just I wouldlike to have a David Letterman, Levy
Lenny Kravitz sandwich. I don't evenknow how that would happen. Shut up,
Okay, all right, what isyour Okay, this is really loaded.
Okay, So you just get topick one thing, all right,
Okay, one thing. What isyour spiciest opinion that most people disagree with?
(32:07):
Oh my gosh, I know Idon't want to it. I don't
want to be canced. Listen,I am. I am a spicy spice
baby. I'm full of spicy opinions. I know. That's how I said
you have to pick, like youhad to pick one or some you know
something you want to share. Okay, I'll tell you this, since I
(32:29):
brought up the cancel I think thecancel culture is bullshit. I think people
do dumb things, people do badthings. The people who do the worst
things get away with it. Andthe people that said something in eighty nine
at a college party, or youknow, did something told the joke,
are being held prisoner and canceled forsomething that I probably would have laughed at
(32:52):
quite honestly, and probably still would. I think people are way too sensitive
and I understand that, you know, going back to the whole mental illness
thing. That's fine. If youare that sensitive and you're that sheltered,
you you are responsible for maintaining thatshelter, not the world. So I
(33:12):
think that that is just crazy.I despise people who want to talk to
the freaking manager. Oh my god, shut the nobody cares. Nobody cares
if your hash browns were just alittle bit too crunchy, or if your
coffee was not warm enough. Youknow, I think people who are making
your food and serving your food aredoing the best they can. And also
(33:34):
it's not an easy job, andI just think people need to mind their
own fucking business, That's what Ithink, and not try to cancel people
because they It's just I just don'tunderstand it. It's like basically people everywhere
tired and trying to take away somebody'swhole life because they told a joke you
didn't like. It's it's the worst, It's absolutely the worst. And it's
(33:57):
like, do we really want sucha sterile environ that if somebody looks at
you crazy, you're going to fallapart. I think that. I think
that also helps me in my inmy passion in my job, because you
know, you don't have to takeeverything personally, and Jessica, you know,
working in our field, but thingsthat people have said to me just
like you know, yeah, youcan go try to give somebody breakfast and
(34:22):
warm gothe and say good morning sir, and you might hear like words that
you've never imagined come out of somebody'smouth. But it's like, okay,
you know, still have a goodday. I'm not going to go and
try to take their sleeping bag awayand cancel them. It's just yeah,
no, So I believe that peoplewho think they're so important that they should
(34:42):
cancel other people, people that activelypursue the detriment of others are what I
would call an asshole. And thenyou know that, like I said,
and the people that do the worstthings get away with it. They don't
get canceled. And that would beanother spicy opinion. So I'm not even
going to get into you told meto pick one. Well, yeah,
(35:05):
you go down a spicy rabbit holeright now. Yeah, I think in
the future, you know the plan, we do have some plans for a
spicy spicy rabbit hole podcast. Maybethat's what we should call it. You
know, not to give too muchaway. Not to give too much away
just yet, but yeah, thefuture, we got something. Oh yeah,
has nothing to do with what hasnothing to do with painful colonoscopies,
(35:30):
the spicy rabbit hole. Maybe sometimesmaybe it does. Sometimes we might talk
about the Spicy rabbit Hole. Yeah, I can't wait for the new podcast.
That is something that I really ampassionate about. Also, that's a
good goal. That is a goodgoal. Yeah, that sucker off the
ground before, like right around thenew year. Perhaps. Oh yes,
(35:51):
yep, yep, it's been it'sbeen some time coming, but it's gonna
have it. It's gonna happen.Oh God, did you make me blush?
Jessica? I think I did.I think I did unintentionally for sure.
The first Usually it's Jessica is turningas red as the flowers on my
(36:15):
wall. Yep. And it's usuallyfairly, fairly easy, because Jessica is
the most innocent, sweet person you'llever meet in your life. For real,
Jessica, you are well wait tillyou interview me. I guess maybe
(36:35):
your opinion will change. Maybe youropinion will change. I don't think so,
Jessica. I've seen you in allkinds of situations, and every time
you surprise me at how truly gentleyou are. Oh, I am like,
you are making me blush. I'mready to strike people down with a
sword, and you're just like,oh, I don't know that he meant
it. Okay. Jessica's the sweetestand I love her. Okay, Oh
(37:01):
my god. So what do youthink about the phrase you are the sum
of the five people you spend themost time with. Am I the sum
or the average? No, youare. It's been It's like it's one
of the it's a fact that peopletend to be the sum of the five
people you spend the most time with. Yeah, I'm okay with that.
(37:22):
I think I surround myself with goodpeople. I've always heard it was the
average of the people, you know. So you add add all the people
up, and then you divide itby five and that's you. You get
the at you're the average of thefive people in your life. But I'm
still okay with that because I Ihave surrounded myself with some pretty extraordinary people
(37:44):
you included. Oh, thank you. So I'm okay with that. Yeah,
Yeah, I feel good about that. I know that there have been
times in my life where I wasjust like, oh my god, if
I wasn't in this friend group,you would all be zeros. But now
you're a ten. Thank you garment. But that's not the case now.
I think. I think it ebbsand flows. I think some days I'm
(38:07):
some days I'm the hundred, somedays I'm the ten. You know you
want to be around, You wantto surround yourself with the people who actually
care about you, care about yoursuccess is just as much as when you
are down. So right, Imean, so, I yeah, I
have I have a handful of friendsthat I've known a long time, but
(38:28):
not even a handful. I haveone friend I'm known for twenty five years.
Another I've known for a long time, and I would count you as
one of my good friends too.But people have seen me through some of
my toughest times and they still lovedme, And I've seen them through some
of their toughest times and there's stillthat love and encouragement and dedication to the
(38:52):
friendship or the relationship. Right,So, I think you're right, like,
when you're down and out, thelast thing you want to do is
be around people who really sort ofrelish in your pain, because there are
people who feed on that. Buttrue, a true friend, doesn't you
know, A true friend might crywith you and also like give you a
kick in the pants when you needit, encourage you. Yeah, so
(39:15):
exactly. Yeah, yeah. Yougotta surround yourself with people who you love
and people who love you. Ithink this is the last question for you,
Carmen, for right now, forright okay, okay, I know
there's way more to Carmen then wecan get through in just one episode.
I don't know, maybe maybe not. If you had the attention of the
(39:37):
whole world for five minutes, whatwould you say, you mean, I
don't have the attention to that.If I have the attention to the whole
world, what would I say?I would say. Treat each other as
you wish to be treated, Bekind, love each other. You don't
have to spend time, You don'thave to hang out with people, but
(39:59):
just respect who they are. Mindyour own business. If you can't,
like say something nice, just bundyour own business and just love each other.
Lift people up. Also, talkmore, talk more to people you
know you never know, like howyou've how you could possibly change a person's
life just by acknowledging them and givingthem your time for a few moments at
(40:21):
the grocery store. Mm hmmm.So I would just encourage people to if
you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. And
I have to I have to likerepeat that to myself several times because you
know, I get a little spicy. You talked about the cancel culture is
being kind of like you're one ofyour first spicy topics, right, thinking
(40:43):
that came to your mind first thing, and that just it's so true,
Like why are we canceling them outjust because at this moment in their life
when they had this whole lifetime andthen maybe they have another whole life ahead
of them. That's that's more positive. So why are we canceling that part
out and make their whole life miserablebecause of it? Well, don't say
anything, is kind of what you'resaying is like, hey be kind,
(41:06):
let's remember that we're all human,right, I mean, back to cancel
culture, Like it pisses me off. If I get like a crabby pizza,
we'll say that, right, Butyou know I have to You also
have to look at yourself and gowas it me? Was it? Because
I was feeling sick, and Iexpected this pizza to line my esophagus with
gold. I don't know, Idon't know, but you know, like,
(41:29):
but the last thing you want todo, Like, why would you
want to put somebody's business in jeopardybecause of one crappy pizza? Yeah,
Like, the world has a wayof working those things out naturally. You
know, if the pizza is reallycrappy, don't go back there. Go
somewhere else. You know, otherpeople might really enjoy that crappy pizza.
(41:50):
But you know, I don't haveto go there. I don't have to
go there. I don't have togive my business. But I certainly also
do not need to just trash thisplace and I put several people out of
work because of my opinion. Itry to stay out of the rabbit holes
of social media, but somebody mightjust say, like, hey, does
anybody hear this one thing in theneighborhood last night? And you have all
(42:14):
these people commenting, and all ofa sudden it gets into this discussion of
like gun and control. Somehow itturns into all these other political things,
and you're like, what the heck? All I wanted to do is get
some advice on you know what todo about these kids ringing my doorbell at
midnight? Fine, you know what, maybe I won't ask for help next
(42:34):
time, right, because, Oh, I think people like this social media.
You know, it's made it soeasy for people to just sort of
purge themselves of all sorts of negativefeelings and without putting a face to it.
You know, it's very easy.It's just a little device in your
hand. It seems so harmless.People say gruesome, disgusting things about other
people that you know, quite franklyshouldn't be sun. I think people need
(42:58):
to mind their own business, standtheir own lane, but be kind.
Like, if you're gonna say something, make it uplifting. It takes a
second to do it. And honestly, like little kids, people don't realize
the little kids have so much stressand anxiety already. Like you remember being
a kid, remember that, youknow, Like we didn't have strawberry pop
tarts. I'm gonna have a fuckingmeltdown like I needed. We only have
(43:22):
what the brown chicker? That's theworst, right, Yeah, ioever invented
those? It hates children second,So you know, like strawberry pop tarts
And then like you get my momused to buy the box like the big
one, and there was always thatvariety, and then there was the one
without frosting. Were oh, yeah, what the heck, what the heck?
(43:44):
Right, kept putting it in theback, and then one day,
you know, here's the one withoutfrosting. And Okay, my day is
already starting off shitty, and nowI have to go to school and deal
with some people who don't like myleg warmers. Okay, I'm dating myself
right now, but whatever. Yeah, I were warmers to school. I
remember, I remember the leggings thathad the hooks underneath the well. Yeah,
(44:09):
and uh you know they never rodeup, not let leggings normally do.
Anyways, it's hard to but youknow what happens if you're like tall,
or you have any amount of buttat all. Oh okay, yeah
sure, yeah, then you getcrotch a lot. Yesich is so uncomfortable.
I would much rather have high watersthan sagging crotch. Yeah, So
(44:32):
I will end my I'm I donewith my I will end on be kind.
Yes, it takes practice, becauseit's so easy just pop off,
especially for somebody like me. I'vegot tons of quick, sharp tongue.
Things to say, But and ittakes more time to think of the kind
and better version of that. SoI would just ask everybody to try.
(44:53):
Oh and if if the world isstill listening, they are everybody. Everybody
sent me one doll us so Ican get what so we could continue our
work on the streets of the world. I'm mystery. Sorry, it's lucky.
We're going on the street so wecould continue our work on the streets.
(45:13):
More than a dollar? Why youcan't get anything for a dollar?
No, ILL show you my ariolafor a dollar. Why? Why wouldn't
I show my ariola for a dollar? No? Why do we have to
say that word ariola? Yeah,I don't know, it's weird. Thanks
(45:37):
everyone for joining us today on smallTown USA. You want to hear more
small Town hit subscribe now go ahead, all wait. Make sure you check
out the links in the description ofthis podcast for our Twitter and Instagram accounts.
Don't miss your exit like, shareand follow us now now leaving small
Town USA. Small Town USA isa production of nineteen Media Group. If
(46:05):
you would like to feature your smalltown in an episode or have suggestion for
future shows, follow us on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter at small Town USA
Show, Thank you for joining us, and come again real soon.
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