Episode 8 - Aliens: Episode 1 of Whatever Part 2 - Smut Tea Stories

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Buckle up, Buttercup, there's fuckeryto discuss. A writer, an editor,
and a reader walk into an indiebookstore and start an unhinged indie Monster
and Aliens mud podcast because why thefuck not? And welcome to the thrilling
conclusion of the May twenty twenty threeAliens Episode one. Oh whatever. I

(00:22):
don't know why I did, Chattner, but I did. And now the
conclusion. This was a really harddecision for me because Aliens are m a
jam. If I had to pickUm, and like aliens were my gateway,
and if I had to pick likefavorite, it would definitely be Orcs,
but like, aliens of all varietiesare behind that, so I went

(00:44):
ahead and went with the Horde Kingseries by Zoe Draven. These are a
little higher angst than I like,but I love them so much and I
love of the characters and the world. Okay, So I read that the
male main characters are supposed to beUm, loosely based off of the Game

(01:10):
of Thrones character the Jason Momoa playsUm. I have never been threshed.
Yes, so I've never watched,say with Jason Momoa, never watched Game
of Thrones because I heard there waslike an eyeball squishing scene and I was
like, I'm out. I can'tdo that kind of violence in my life.

(01:30):
Yeah. Game of Thrones is likepure angst. I would not recommend
it for you. Thank death sexand I think sex except for the one
kid uh padre Oh that was funny. Yeah, where he did have to
pay at all. He didn't haveto pay the the professionals the sex fapto,

(01:57):
it's fine, You're good your moneyis so based on the you know,
Google image and description of the deathRaki like that does line up with
Zoe Dravn's Horde Kings. UM.The male main characters are very like Alpha

(02:19):
UM. And that's not to saythat like, you know, once they
get to know they're human women,UM, that they're like, you know,
toucher on you die kind of thing, UM. Very protective of their
tiny human females. UM. Andso it's on um an advanced planet,
and the humans are there as refugeesUM because Earth has kind of collapsed.

(02:43):
So it takes place in the future. Yeah and so yeah, right,
so the humans are in this kindof subservient position where their rights are really
limited and UM, they're like they'renot even allowed to light fire because uh,
it's seen as like disrespectful to theearth. So they're like barely scraping

(03:06):
by and uh. In the firstbook, one of the Horde kings comes
to realize that they had lit afire and um, it was our female
main character's brother who did it.And she was like, take me instead.
It was very very beauty and thebeast, take me, said,
you love the beauty and the beast, Don't she funny? Because I don't

(03:28):
like the Disney movie. I wouldn'tbang him as a beast. I wouldn't
bang him as the prince. I'mnot into it. I don't like first.
I would happily stay in that libraryfor the rest of forever. Yeah,
I'm a Francophile, so it's fine. I'd bang either one. I
don't care. So um he takesher and um she thinks she's just going

(03:51):
to be like his slave and he'slike, no, you're going to be
my bride and she's like what soum, and uh. I love the
way that the culture was set up. I loved, um there is angst
in it and that she's like,I'm not ready to be someone's bride.
Like it's very very Stockholming at firstum, and then um, the rest

(04:15):
of the series continues to get betterand um, I've read all of them
multiple times, so I love thatis just cracking out, just dying over
there is it? Because the Stockholm, who's that? It's my Stockholm?
Me just leave it to all ofus with alien room miss to be like,

(04:39):
it's okay Stockholm. If they're thefaded babe, it works out.
Book three for me is basically justlike a straight beauty and the Beast retelling
for bubble babes um. And I'mlike, oh, you know, I
was thinking all yesterday, I'm like, well, how do I make it
redeemed? Like? You can't havesomebody kidnapped somebody? And then you know,

(05:01):
falling lot of them and then mehearing all the books, we all
like and I'm like, oh nowe can. It's it's fine, you're
over don't overthink it. It's fiction. Don't overthink, no thoughts, just
head exactly. Yes. So,um, it's a little on the stock

(05:25):
Um, It's fine. Um,but um, all of them are really
good. And one of them isa second chance romance, which I am
firmly against. And I read itand loved it and was like, zoe
E, so curse you for makingme love the trope I hate you know

(05:46):
it's there. There are some tropesthat I'm like, Nope. I mean
there are things that are like ahard no for me, Like I like
we've talked like ye choose or rh, whatever you want to call it.
Nope, I'm too jealous, likeI that is not a jam.
I best of luck to all ofyou. I'm just it's it's not that
I'm too jealous. I'm too insecure. I already questioned my husband, who

(06:08):
I've been married too since twenty seventeen, do you still like me? I
don't need to do that to fivepeople. I read my first RH like
six months ago, and I wasgetting jealous for the main characters, like
I was just like oh oh oh, and I it's my spicy Italian side

(06:31):
that like Italians are basically touch herand die about everything, Like that's just
the Italian people in a nutshell.Like my dad. My dad was a
touch my daughters and die kind ofguy. Like my my brother is that
way with his wife. It's justyou know, we're very protective and so

(06:53):
like me and like again, polyamoryand like white cheese and all that stuff.
I am not trying yuck anybody's.Yeah, my little jealous heart cannot
handle it. I'm not advanced enough. I'm on beginner mode and I know
it like easy mode. That's allI can handle. I enjoyed the stories,
but as a as a person,I am way too insecure. Yeah.

(07:16):
Sometimes I have to realize because youknow, in most like why Choose
books, there's that point where likeone of them is jealous and they have
to overcome that. I just haveto skip to the smud and I'm like,
Okay, we know you get there, just like take me to the
place where you get there. Yeah, I get so worked up. I

(07:36):
mean, I just know I'm toodemi for that shit to work, because
it's already takes so much for meto fall in love with one person,
but come on more once I'm monogamousto a fault. Yeah, yeah,
for sure, That's why lovet fadedmates. I know, I don't think
I'll ever get tired of faded mates. Honestly, I had reviewer leave me

(08:00):
at a comment once and it wasjust like, I don't know how much
I like faded mates, but likeI liked your book, and I'm like,
you don't like faded mates. Iguess you're very secure in yourself.
Then you have no self confidence issuesand you know people will love you and
you don't need faded mates. Butget off my lawn. We've got Petro
with Alien Tyrant by Ursidas. Personally, as a esthetic person, I'm not

(08:28):
really into chest covers. I hadblown through everything in ice Pland of Barbarians,
and Ursadax comes up a lot undersuggested reading on your kindle, and
so I was like, you knowwhat, I'll give it a try.
I did not know they were kangarooaliens. Going into this me again,
I'm never gonna get turned on bykangarooli and that's impossible. And they're not

(08:50):
kangaroos, you know, mind youthey are kangaroo esque. They've got the
tail, they've got the sick bodies, and I mean kangaroos do already look
super masculine. Sales just like andyeah, for everybody listening, I made
a strong man fest and I said, oh, what I liked a lot

(09:11):
about these books is that they're notabducted by aliens. They're abducted by the
US government, which is a lotmore plausible. Yeah, I believe that.
I believe that because there is Idon't know if it's something they need
or they're just trying to contact thealiens, because again, my brain only

(09:31):
really latches onto the P and VGaction, but I think I'm actually to
this world. They're looking for resources, Yeah, they're looking for a resource
and they find this alien civilization.Yeah, well they found this alien planet
and they're going to investigate. Butthen what they end up doing is they
kidnap women from all over the worldwho have special that are have niches,

(09:56):
but they don't have family, theydon't have a lot of people it would
miss them. And so you've gotlike the main character of this book is
a linguist. Yeah, I've gota lot of different specialties. CC gets
abducted by the government while jogging tobe part of this mission, and they
literally just take all these women,fly them up right above the planet,

(10:18):
and they're like, all right,here's a week of training, go make
contact with the alien civilization. Wewant shit on this planet. Figure it
out. And so they go downand they immediately crash a bunch of like
crab spiders immediately start attacking, andthe alien man rescue CC in particular,

(10:39):
and then a bunch of other alienpeople from other tribes come and take the
rest of the women. But whatCC doesn't know is that this this alien
culture, their faded mates are revealedto them through this like alien dragon,
and so like the dragon comes toyou and takes you to these like mythical
pools that are full of the Ithink it's the lack of Rica's blood and

(11:00):
it's white, and it also cureseverybody when they go in there, and
it can give you and view specialpowers onto you. And so it takes
the leader of this tribe. Ithink his name is like Brodie. Okay,
it's basically like a well brode aboutthat before and she's like, I
have no idea, I just wroteit that. Yeah, I'm not the

(11:22):
only one. I have very specificpronunciations in my mind. But then when
people read it and they say itfanatically, I'm like, oh, I
spelled that wrong. I think it'ssupposed to be Barodi, but I just
call him Brody in my brain becauseI'm like, I know a couple of
Brodie's. But yeah, Brodie.Alien guy gets taken to the pool by

(11:43):
this alien and then it has shownthis like pale, weird looking thing and
it's a human and that's his mate. And he just comes out of the
pool and he's like, what thefuck am I supposed to do? But
I don't even know what that is? Like, is that even sentient?
Like, oh can I have sexwith that? I don't know? And

(12:03):
so when this thing crashes and hesees these women, they don't quite look
like they did in the pool becausethey have all the sunscreen on and the
solar jackets because the sun is sointense it's like a desert planet. And
so he picks her up and he'sjust like, oh, it's you.
And but they can't speak to eachother. No matter how good of a
linguished she is, they can't speakto each other. And so she's just

(12:26):
like and the reason I picked thiswell we were talking about Ruby Dickson,
is because these aliens are like ubermacho, like strapped to the nines with
knives. They are not cinnamon rolls. Some of them are kind of problematic,
sorry, but you know, theykind of learn their ship. The

(12:46):
other thing that I think is kindof cool, just from like a world
building like design standpoint, is theireyes are all black and then they have
like clusters in them of like theyalmost look like stars that like tightened and
widened depending on what they're feeling.And they're very alien. And I think
the more I get into alien romance, the more I want my aliens to

(13:09):
be very alien like. I don'twant them to just look like a man
that's a little different, like No, I want him to have a kangaroo
tail. I want him to havebig, old black eyeballs. I want
to be able to throw me acrosshis giant centipede that he rides through the
desert like it's like a crocodile head. I was just yea with a crocodile
head, okay, And but youknow, it's it's definitely set up kind

(13:33):
of similarly to Ruby. And Idon't know if Ruby was the first person
to do this, I doubt it, but for these long sci fi series
where you know, and I doit too, where the main chunk of
the book is your main couple,and then at the very end you kind
of set up your next book.And the girls are all so different and
so are the aliens, and likethe next alien is like literally killed his

(13:58):
own father, like batshit, Likehe's just like out there and it ends
up working out, and the womanthat he's with is like the leader of
the little army that they've got goingon. I really liked them. I
think there's something a little different.Okay, so this month I actually read
a whole new book for me.I saw it and I said, yes,

(14:22):
please, because this has to bebetter than the movie with the very
similar name. The book is calledCowboys and Aliens. This is nowhere near
the Daniel Craig movie a prop.I was gonna say, how smuddy is
that Daniel Craig movie asking for afriend? It could have been a lot

(14:50):
better. I'm just saying, theman's got a nice but use it.
I mean, come on, people, you know that even when reading my
own book, which we can allagree is mostly phil I go I could
add another sex scene. That wassomething I can do? Jen and yes,

(15:15):
Jens basically telling Carlotta skip this wholeconversation that is actually meaningful, just
give us more filth. Oh Ithink it was five extra sex scenes,
wasn't it. No, No,it's short, Sonny be the short.
She's just like, scrap all ofthis and just bring us to the fuckinging.

(15:39):
What sex scene did I leave outfor you. Then in book one,
Oh, maybe I'll write you abonus chapter if you're a good girl.
Um, they didn't like after shewas tied to the tree. If
they didn't have sex, I wouldhave I would have done a little bit

(16:00):
more of that. She included thather own book. She made up for
it. Wow, she did.Okay, we get inspired, Jack,
She's doing very much. By theway, if you want to thank anybody
for anything in my book, youneed to thank Amelia Aberman's. She gave

(16:22):
me all the prompts for the entiretyof bubble Babes. Oh good to know,
God to know. Like just shewrites mafia romance, and she her
books called Under the Shadows. Um. She is a delightful little piece of
shit that I love so much.But don't tell her because it'll go to
her head. But she literally waslike, all right, here's your prompt.

(16:42):
I want somebody to get tied toa tree. And I said,
we're in out of space, youbitch, And she said, I don't
care. Figure it out, it'san alien tree. Here you go.
Yeah, the entirety of bubble Babeswas written just as prompt exercises. I
was never going. I can appreciatethat I love. She Never's so bonkers.

(17:03):
I'm taking like every trope I loveand just putting them all in this
book. So I don't know whatI'm gonna do with the next book.
Um you do. That was mewhen I started writing book two. Is
like, I don't know where thisis going. I don't know if this
is any good, and I don'tknow if you guys know. But I
post chapters on like my Patreon,and I post stuff on Bella too,

(17:25):
and so it's kind of like havingbuilt in feedback, like as you're going.
And I was really worried. Andthen one of my readers was like,
if you don't give me more fuckingchapters, I'm going to freak out.
And I was like, Okay,we're going in the right direction.
I was with Carlotta last year.I know I'm actually where we were last
Yeah, don't. I don't understandyour rating system, if I'm being honest,

(17:45):
Carlotta, as far as like thenumbering on your books. I'm reading
the second book after the first book. Okay, that seems valid. Yeah,
okay, correct, these are supposedto be one book. And I
started writing this and then the BigFields anthology was going to happen, and

(18:06):
I'm like, okay, well maybeI could do a prequel. So then
I did Thorne stuff as the prequel. So this sets up, you know,
how things are gonna go, andthen this is these two. It's
basic. I could not imagine.I could not imagine reading the second book
without reading the first book, though, I don't know if it's just because
I've read the first book. Ohyou mean the Thorn stuff, Yeah,

(18:27):
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's um. It's supposed to set
up like the whole concept of thePortal and the Orgelians, and it's honestly
just a good standale it is.Yeah, Thorn is adorable. Yeah.
Are they technically aliens insert from anotherplanet? Dimensions? Okay, they're like

(18:48):
across the universe. Their planet's calledtell Them and they there used to be
portals all over Earth where they wouldyou know, go back and forth.
And but yes, just a hardwarning. Ruger's Pearl is a slow bird.
I'm sorry, I'm not sorry.It's okay. I like so I
like a slow burn. It's notthat I don't like a slow burn.

(19:10):
When I started writing Bubble Babes,I wanted to get right to the fucking
right away. That's the only reasonit's install ust now. Book two is
almost what would you call like aslow burn in that universe for me,
But that just means there's lots ofvoyeurism at the beginning. I love it.
I love having like the masturbatitions happeningbefore there's master Baden. It brings,

(19:34):
it helps build things up. Itshows the sexual tension in the Ruby
Dickson I picked, uh Barbarian alienis uh yeah, so it's chef's kiss
right so in Cowboys and Aliens.This one was by Demelza Carlton, who's

(19:56):
for me, I know her morefor her gargoyle stuff. This one I
again, I saw the cover.Yeah, I gotta know what that's about.
I got I gotta know because itcame at She published this in twenty
twenty November of twenty twenty, andit's technically this story itself is like forty

(20:18):
eight pages, but at the endof it is you know, a little
bit of a setup for the nextone. So the full thing, the
full ebook, is like sixty pages. It's really easy to get through.
Our female main character, Raina.She's an air elemental who lost most of
her species on the spaceship Titanic onthe way to the colony Hope, I

(20:41):
think is what the colony is called, where a lot of species went after
the wars that took over basically theuniverse, and these are just kind of
the refugees of who's left that weknow of, whosout a Titanic. Who
thought that would be a good idea? Yeah, I said it. It's
a name type, Hannah. Yeah, I thought that was just you alluding

(21:03):
to the fact that it was onthe nose, got it? Did it
hit a meteor or an asteroid likeit's supposed to be like an iceberg?
So that part she does. Samelsadidn't get into that bit. It was
just kind of like, oh,by the way, this is what happened
to me, just briefly, kindof sidebar thought moment, and that was

(21:27):
about it. Then our main guycharacter, his name is Byron. He's
human. He is on one ofthe lower decks with a farm all to
himself. He's a farm number threeand he's the only one with cows,
and unfortunately his personal cows all hada disease and they had to destroy the

(21:48):
herd, including the remaining embryos,but they were able to provide him with
a brand new cow that had kindof a sped up biology to help grow
full full Side is a much quicker, and he fell in love with this
little precious calf immediately. It's like, Okay, hey, Bessie, how
are you doing. Baby? You'remine? Now you're good. Okay,
that's fucking adorable, I know.And because of his hat and the way

(22:11):
he talks, his friends call himBilly the kid. I laughed so hard.
So Raina is the secretary for oneof the higher up. He has
tasked her to create an event forThis is going to be the Colonies one
year anniversary. It's our one oone birthday. Need to make this big

(22:33):
so that everybody remembers what has happenedand how far we've come and this that
and the other. And for somereason, she has decided she wants to
make this Thanksgiving esque. The onlyplace she can get any variation of beef
is Byron's farm. Oh, he'sgot the meat for her. You know,

(22:53):
she's an air elemental, so shecan kind of just vanish where other
people don't see her. So shedoes that while manning a drone to get
just a sample of DNA from Bessiethat she could mass produce beef for the
colony to eat. She wants tomake some beyond burgers. What he didn't

(23:18):
see her. He just saw thedrone coming after his only cow. He's
very his little baby Bessie. He'slike, screw that to see, like
karate chop it out of the air, because that's what I imagine something like
that. Yeah, and then sheappears. It's like, don't break it.
Bleat. They have a nice littleconversation. They get to an understanding

(23:42):
and like do you want to feedher? It's like, yeah, I'd
love to feed her. And theychat for a bit and the next thing
they know, neither one of themreally understand why all of a sudden,
they're just a smoochin over here inthe barn. I mean, it happens,
it does, and of just thehe was just a kiss, and

(24:04):
neither one of them understood how ithappened or why. But you're welcome to
come back. I would love tocome back. And then they don't talk
for multiple days because she's very busytrying to set up Thanksgiving for a colony
of a ridiculous amount of species.He asked her on a date to go
to the Thanksgiving together. She goes, but again because she's in charge.

(24:26):
Is this a Thanksgiving book? Basically? Okay, hol any Holiday number one?
Oh? Okay, got it.I'm sorry to cut you off.
I just I was reading looking atthe good Reads page, and the first
review that comes up is a fivestar review from a profile picture of a
very old man and it says thiswas only one cowboy, one alien,

(24:48):
and one calf, but it wasenough for an enjoying or engaging, enjoyable,
erotic Thanksgiving story. Thank you,Stan. All right, Stan,
for me, there wasn't a wholelot of erotic that happened. They nearly,
they nearly do some fun stuff inher office, but then her boss,
of course, has to interrupt.We have to probably know that that's

(25:12):
probably erotic for stand sir, that'sfair. It's like the time we watched
the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show with mygrandpa on Thanksgiving and he asked me later
if we have just watched porn together? And I said no, Grandpa,
like no, I said, hesaid, thank god, then just walked

(25:33):
away. Dan, you live yourbest life. I'm glad that was erotic
for you, but I stand Stan, Stan, you live your best life.
Yep, I'm looking at that particularreview right now. He I want
to read all of Stan's books thatI need to go to his page and
just ready just got to follow stand. But yeah, he's only got one

(25:56):
follower at the moment. We needto up that number. So this book,
Cowboys and Aliens, it was good. I would have preferred it if
it was longer and definitely more spicy, because that there was a brief spiciness
at the end that wasn't quite detailed. It alluded to the fact that she
was all for tentacle play because shedoesn't know that in front of my face

(26:19):
and not give me that up.She doesn't know what humans prefer. And
she can shift because air elemental,she can just kind of make herself up
here how she feels she needs to. If he was up for it,
she would do that. I volunteerstribute officially following Stan. By the way,

(26:40):
he is currently reading Chloe and theBeanstock. I'm I'm following I'm following
Stan. Yeah, yeah, Ithink we've all we're all just not following
Stan. It's like Stants list isalmost as good as that list on good
Reads. It's called Bonk Good toHorny Jail. It's such a good list.
I did Alien Reject by Ursa DaxPopular I know, right, I

(27:07):
love Ursidas's books. I like theworld building especially. I like the fact
that she's taken stuff like different plantsand everything else and the nature around them
and is including it as part ofthe world building and aspects with the characters.
Alien Reject deals with the fourth bookin the series, and it has

(27:30):
the character's Cat, who is basicallya very feisty like punk emo slash goth
chick with a shaved head and allthe piercings, and she is so confused
why all of the other women arejust falling in love with these kangaroo aliens

(27:52):
that look like across between you know, Kangaroo Jack and the kangaroo from Tank
Girl. Like, she's not sure, so in my head they looked like
the kangaroos from that nineties kids movieThe Warriors of Virtue. Don't remember that
one, you should google it,know that one. But getting back to

(28:14):
the book, so Kat is veryvery feisty and is not okay with how
quickly all the human women seem tobe falling for aliens of all things.
And she even goes on little adventureswith other other female characters, like to

(28:36):
protect them. She's like, Iam going to make sure that one doesn't
do anything fucking weird. And thenthere's the alien Gallic who he is a
giant cinnamon rule. He is thebouncy boy. He's just golden retriever energy
for the SANC warlords. Like justso bouncy. And it doesn't matter how

(28:57):
much at snarls at him or justignores him or anything. He just bounces
right back. It's like he isa rubber ball. He just he does
just got hard eyes the whole time. It doesn't matter, yes, And

(29:18):
he doesn't need the Labrika to tellhim, the dragon to tell him that
she's his mate. He's just themoment he sees her, he's like,
this one mine. It doesn't matterhow cranky she is. I don't give
a shit. Um And I remember, I don't remember if it was this
book or one of the other ones, the one before where the girls want
to go take like a piss,and then the him and the other aliens

(29:42):
were like I wanted to see whatthey were doing. What was sticky.
So it's very cute solely butcherly hewins her over, especially when they end
up finding this oasis gets to playin actual water for the first time,
so she's like able to take abath. That's the only part about that

(30:03):
entire universe that I've gotten to thisbook at where I would not be down
to clowns, because I need totake two to three baths a day if
I'm being honest, like, Ineed to submerge my body and water or
I'll shrivel up. And by yeah, yeah, I know, no Dusty
Krusty for me, thanks, ifI remember correctly, it was one of
his favorite spots and to show herlike the stars and stuff, and yeah,

(30:29):
they end up falling for each otherand it was very cute. And
he's just a cinnamon roll boy whocan also fight, like. I don't
know what it is about that they'rewild, like you're all warriors or and
hunters. You write giants cinnaped crocodilesthat are vegetarians, strangely enough, and

(30:53):
your cinnamon role too cute. Ineed me one. I just had the
soft spot for like, and that'sone of the reasons why I think I
love Ruby Dixon's books and Ursidax's anda lot of these other sci fi like
alien authors, is that the guysare always super simpy for there so the

(31:17):
partner. The one rule of alienromance is you have to be big simpon,
Like, if you're not a bigsimp are you an alien? Right?
Are you even alien? Are youan alien? I'll be honest.
That is the most alien thing comparedto the humans is how hard they simp.
Yeah, it's just we don't gethard. You must be human.

(31:44):
And I love it when they're tryingnot to simp because I have this scene
that I just wrote in book twofor bubble Babes, and Jiraffe is kind
of like an asshole. He's verysarcastic. He like he's just not like
not like big simping outwardly yet.But the other she catches him smelling her
hair and she's just like, doI stink? And he's just like,

(32:07):
no, no, you don't stink. But he can't he can't say why
she doesn't stink. He just likehe needs to smell her because that's his
mate, and he just like wantsto smell her. And she's like,
oh my god, I stink.I've become nose blind. I'm nose blind.
Now I smell bad and she freaksout about it all day and he's
just like, no, like youdon't smell bad, and he like can't
tell her why she doesn't smell bad. It's just like he's She's like,
why do you keep puffing me?I don't get it. You unlocked a

(32:30):
core memory from me from high school. I went to Catholic high school and
I had long hair back then,like down in my butt, and I
just remember we were in school formass and I felt something tug on my
hair and evidently, like I know, the guy sitting behind me had been

(32:51):
smelling my hair. It was like, bro, it's her blessances. That's
fine. Yeah. She's like,I'm not even using shampoo, like I
must smell terrible. And he's justlike, no, that's not it's not
what it is. It's fine.Just calm down, Okay. So one
of the things that as a groupsomebody stories is done. When I say
group idea, yeah, I kindof went a little bananas and was invited

(33:19):
into a giveaway and then was notgiven parameters on helping. So it turned
into like a hundred person giveaway ofbooks and Um. She was like that's
too much piece and I'm like okay, and then I got Barren. It
helped me and the podcast to helpme and Latrex and Nova healthy. So
we did the Monster Load giveaway withone hundred books from one hundred amazing authors,

(33:44):
including Petra. By by the timethis is released, it would have
already been done. Um, buttoo for all of you who are interested.
We are planning on doing this again, probably in October. So fucking
cool. When I got invited withall these other Momster authors and alien authors

(34:06):
that I read, and I'm like, they know who I am. They
do now if they didn't before.We're about I'm about to be everybody's problem.
Oh wait, hang on, lookat look at her. I'm the
problem. It's me. It's hewas by so many people. It's like,
they know who I am. Whathas happened there days when I want

(34:27):
everybody to perceive me in their dayswhen I do not want to be perceived
or poorly at all. It's Iended up happening all of the apostlem audacity
during this event, and I justit was glorious. I was messaging Findley
fenn An Tiffany Roberts and I'm like, Findley Fenn is commissioning her for art.
I know you're famous, so yeah, now she's she's darling. Oh

(34:54):
my goodness, gracious, No,it was audacity. Everybody's like, you
got who do I joined? I'mlike, I don't know, man,
I just asked, and then Darrowwas asking people, and before we knew
it, it's just like this giveaway. It was absolutely named. Yeah,
it's like, okay, so thatthat all happened and we're planning on doing

(35:19):
it again. It was it was. It was a lot of corraling.
I know that Carlota spent a lotof time making sure that everybody got everything
they needed, so appreciate it.And I did just like what do we
need to post and wear? Andthe rest of it was you're doing really
good, sweetie, proud of you. It's okay. It was great,

(35:42):
awesome kind of hand thank you.I just wanted to do it to bring
us up as a community because absolutely, I mean, you were on this
spot together like and it brought alot of you know, visibility to people.
We came in like a wrecking ball. We don't get key. Everyone's
invited unless you're walking about the monstercommunity that I did not expect is everybody

(36:06):
is so fucking helpful, Like we'reall like, we're all weirdos and we
just have to band together. We'reall weirdos. It's like, what's your
brand of weird? Oh? Ilike that. Come most of those as
a sucker above this penis what's yourpenis? Does not? And it just
sort of just drips come like abusted pipe versus like mine strokes the whole

(36:30):
clip. I don't know if shehad intended that. That's how I read
it. She's gonna die, She'sgonna die with God. Well, and
then you add on top of it, like yesterday I put on one of
the Discord servers like can abe tellme about Vellum? I don't know what
I'm doing, And I had justmultiple people be like this is what you
do? And I was like,oh, thank god, because every time

(36:52):
I have to add a new thing, like when I had to get ESPN
numbers, when I had to setup my KADP like all of that,
I'm like, I cannot you dothis. So it was like Janet's okay,
let me give me your hands,Okay, come on, let's go.

(37:12):
Yeah, I know that When itcomes time to me trying to do
the published thing, I'm going tobe exactly the same way, only I
will probably be crying to your face. You can't fuck it up that bad
that it can't be fixed. Yeah, I mean I pulled my first book
and people still read my shit.So if you fuck it up that bad,

(37:34):
I just take it down. Onething I keep reminding myself of because
I have to otherwise I can't keepattempting to write is Sharknado got five movies.
I can write something I think isgoing to have more books. If
I can do that, anybody canpublish a book. I swear to God
it's doable. And I like,like we said, just put your whole

(37:58):
pussy into it, and that's allabout. Yes, it's all matters,
all right. Before we go forthe for the end of the podcast,
we do have one more introduction ofa new mini series that we're doing.
Excited for this mini series. Idon't even know what this is. Oh,
you're gonna love this, sweetheart,You're gonna love it. So our

(38:20):
beautiful British Badger is now doing themini series. It's called it's called Smutty
Stories Podcast. After the intro isvery like masterpiece theater. Ask on purpose.
There's gonna be little titles like andthe first one is um on your

(38:40):
knees but not in prayer, Andit's a quote from Jen's book. He
sits in a smoking jacket with apipe reading in his British accents. That
is delightful in general. That's gonnatickle a lot of people's fans. Yet
it's true as yeah, they're allthey're gonna all gonna be like thirty seconds

(39:04):
under a minute of him just readinga spicy scene. Um uh since I
yeah, he I gave him abunch of options and he's like, Jen,
these are all going to get communityviolations. Like, if it's not
gonna get a community violation, Idon't want to read it. Right.
We could just put bleeps. It'sfun. I mean we could. We

(39:30):
could even just replace it with amoan. Everyone. We tried to do
like a live narration on TikTok forbubble Babes, and it didn't work because
it was just like every word wasbleaked. Yeah. Well, like there's
something to be said about for whateverany any guy with an accent with American

(39:52):
women is that it doesn't matter whatthe accent is, we love it.
As a group. We are womenin general, fucking ferrel. So yeah,
our statement. The older we get, the more we embrace this which's
just older and get, the hornierwe get, like we're finally allowed to

(40:15):
embrace that side of ourselves because weare in charge of us. There's nobody
else telling us no, no,no, you can't do that, this,
that, the other. We're finallyin charge of ourselves, like and
weird government saying horned aliens. That'swhat I'm doing, you know, that's
what we're all doing. Yeah,we don't have mom or dad over our

(40:38):
shoulder at the bookstore telling us wecan't get that. You have to get
something else. Yeah, no,I'm getting this. Yeah, I'm getting
I'm getting mine. Thank you.Yeah. Okay, So that was our
Aliens episode. We hope you enjoyedit, and uh, Petre, thank
you so much for joining us.It was yeah, lovely to have it.

(41:04):
Guess anytime, Like I said,I'm chatty. I can talk about
anything. Whether it's good. We'lllet Rob decide. He can cut it
into No, we thought it wasit was predp matters. All right,
Well you guys, thank you somuch for tuning in and listening and for

(41:25):
Petra and we let us know whatyou think. We're curious, and please
go read all of the books thatwe did because they were amazeballs. Anyway,
thank you so much. Trash catsout out by

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Episode 8 - Aliens: Episode 1 of Whatever Part 2

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Episode 8 - Aliens: Episode 1 of Whatever Part 2