June 14, 2024 • 20 mins
In this compelling episode, host Martina sits down with Tanatswa Chikaura, a passionate mental health advocate, to delve into the pressing issues surrounding mental health today. Tanatswa shares personal stories, insights, and the challenges faced in raising awareness about mental health in various communities. Together, they discuss the stigma surrounding mental health, the importance of open conversations, and practical steps to support those struggling with mental health issues. Join us for an enlightening and inspiring discussion that aims to break the silence and foster a more compassionate approach to mental well-being
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/soundcheck-zw--6201716/support.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/soundcheck-zw--6201716/support.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What's Up Everybody? Welcome to the Chatroom, a podcast dedicated
with having interviews with upcoming stars and influencers of our generation.
Please follow us on Facebook and Instagram at the chatroom
dot tcr and on Twitter at the chatroom underscore TCR. Also,
don't forget to become one of our valued Patreon members,
which allows you to unlock exclusive content while also supporting
(00:25):
this podcast. Enjoy the episode.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
What's Up Everybody? Welcome back to the chat Room Today.
Your host is Martina and I've got the wonderful Tonight's
what Chikara here with me. She's a young powerhouse who's
passionate about mental health. She's about to graduate with a
bachelor's degree in psychology from the University of Zimbabwe. So,
without further ado Tanatso how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Hey, Martina? How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
I'm great? Thank you? How are you?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I'm okay, I'm good. It's been raining a lot, so
that's a bit much, but I'm okay.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Yeah. That's the thing with us. When it wasn't raining,
we were complaining. Now it's raining, we're complaining as well.
But other than that, have you had a good Saturday?
What did you get up to today.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Do you want today?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
I had?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
I made a cheeseboard with.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
My friend, Yes, rich anti vibes.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
So it's about yet exactly are your lord?
Speaker 2 (01:22):
You know?
Speaker 3 (01:23):
The life we want?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Soft life, yes, self life always, that's what it's about.
So anyway, let's just jump straight into the questions. A
couple of questions that I have for you that will
just allow us to interact and allow people to get
to know you better. So, according to your Instagram bio,
you carry quite a number of caps like you're out
here representing the females, like you're a director at my
(01:48):
State of Mind organization and a presenter for pachausim right,
and you also have a block.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
That's true. That's true.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
So I guess first question is with all these caps,
how do you man your time and the stress that
comes with everything.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
That's very difficult if I'm being honest, But I can imagining.
What keeps me going, you know, are the goals that
I've set for myself. I want to be the best
version of myself in every possible way. So when I
get tired, I remind myself that, oh tonight, So getting tired,
my dear, no one is going to put.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
You haven't even started.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You have to move. So I just have to remind
myself that, you know, the finish line is still very far.
But at the same time, I want to enjoy the
process and enjoy the journey, so I push myself.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Yeah, a lot of people actually focus more on the
destination than the actual journey of getting where they want
to go.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Right exactly. That's very true, and that's it's not worth
it if you're not going to enjoy the journey. Because
if I reach my destination at forty and I'm twenty two,
that means I've missed at thirty eight years of my
life being miserable. That's a long time.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
That is a very long time.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Thirty So it's eighteen years of eighteen years, eighteen eighteen,
not thirty eight, but eighteen. Okay, yes, got.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
It, ma'am, got it. So anyway, when you pursued psychology
as a degree, what was the end goal? Was the
end goal to be sitting across someone in a room
and saying, tell me about your childhood or you know
those other things that we stereotypically thik therapists do. Like,
what was the end goal for you when you said
I'm going to study psychology.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Funny story, Actually I didn't want to do psychology. I
didn't even know psychology was a thing in university when
I was in lower six. I wanted to do law.
That's what I wanted. Oh okay, And in my head
I had planned it. I was going to be a lawyer,
was going to be an act kid. I looked for
(04:01):
mentors that way, in the field of floor people to
tell me how I can go about it. I started
working towards getting fifteen points because I knew that I
was going to go to the University of Zimbabwe.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
And they're very demanded in terms of art like law.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Hey, exactly, So I knew if I wanted to get in,
I had to get fifteen points. And I worked. I
worked hard, Matina.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
Like I can imagine help.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
And I didn't have fifteen points. I thought my world
was over, Like.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
I thought my life was like just out of curiousity,
like it wasn't fifteen, but what was it?
Speaker 3 (04:37):
It wasn't fifteen, it was eleven and I was four
points off. And do you know when you like you
were upset, when you put I was beyond. I was
not only upset, I was broken, like I felt like
I was nothing. I felt like I had failed. I
didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to start.
I didn't even my head was I was so confused.
(04:58):
And I'm really appreciative the family I have, my uncle,
my parents, and my brother and I had a conversation
with my uncle and he said to me, Tonata, you
did very well, and as a family, we're proud of you.
If you're not happy, you've got options. Option number one,
you go back and you write your A levels and
you try to get those Siftain points. You write it again,
(05:20):
or you move on with what you have, You build
on that, you look for ways to then do law. Afterwards,
you do another degree. How are you going to work
around it? And then my brother told me about psychology
and he told me, oh, have you ever heard of psychology?
Do you know human resources? You know my human resources
He was working adults at the time. He was like,
(05:41):
my human resources director had a psych bachelors and psychology,
you can pursue that. And then another road was you
can start psychology, do your first year, get really good
points and see if you can swap okay, and then
do law you're in the next year. I was like,
I'm going to work with that. I'm going to start
(06:03):
psychology work on it, and next year, when i'm starting
my second year, I'm going.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
To switch to law.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
The results exactly and switched to first year comes. I
go to school. I got my results in January. I
started that February. I went to university. It was a
different life. I was a chisy and it's an old
girls school. So seeing boys I was in rasis these
people I'm like, and I'm like, exactly, And you know,
(06:32):
when you're university, boys can visit girls. I'm like, excuse them,
what what's going on?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
What are you doing here?
Speaker 3 (06:40):
What are you doing? So it was just a different vibe.
I started doing psychology. The first test we wrote, I
was the highest in my class. I was like, what
is what's going on?
Speaker 2 (06:52):
This seems cool?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Let me try it out. You're write your second test,
are you're killing it? My first myth I had five distinctions.
You go to the next and you've got three. The
next year. My whole second year I did twelf courses.
I had twelve distinction straight yes, And I was like, Okay,
I'm good at this program. I actually enjoy what I'm
being twitter. I enjoy the concepts. I want to know more.
(07:15):
I had this desire this, there was something in this drive,
this urge to know more. I want to understand what's
going on. And then I became a mental health advocate.
That's how I became a mental health advocate because I
wanted to understand what mental health was about and understand
why it's not being recognized in my country. With the
gap is why it's not being recognized in our homes,
(07:36):
in our in politics and law and schools and everything.
I wanted to understand and that is what pushed me
to become a mental advocate. So you know, the end
goal and I started psychology, was to actually swap but
now the end goal is to graduate dear my master's
and clinical Psychology, Open and Injury, oh that advocates for
(07:58):
mental health. That is where I see myself going and
actually have a firm practice, get my license and be
a certified clinical psychologist. So it started with swapping the
degree and ended with me actually understanding my purpose and
knowing what I'm supposed to do. It's all about finding
your purpose, especially in university.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, to know.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
What your purpose is within your program.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Definitely, and things have a funny way of working out.
I mean, you wanted to do law and become an advocate.
Now you're an advocate for mental health, so technically you
are not too far.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Thank you. This is why I like you.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
And you know, mental health is such a big issue,
especially in Africa. I believe right in Africa you find
that maybe it's not taken as seriously as in other continents,
especially for the male gender. From my own observations. Obviously,
as a person who's done the degree, you probably have
a different perspective. But the one question I have, and
a lot of people or often have, is how do
(09:01):
we tackle the issues of men fearing speaking up about
mental health issues because they don't want to be viewed
as being weak.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
You know what, Thank you so much for asking that question,
because this is a topic. It's an ongoing topic right now,
especially in Zimbabwe. After the death of Soldier Love Me
his soul rest in peace. You see people that are
talking about how he spoke about how we felt in
his music. You have people that are saying that he
didn't get the attention he needed before and people ignored him.
(09:31):
And I feel like that comes from the whole idea
that a man is strong. A man cannot cry, a
man cannot complain. You're at the head of the house.
We live in a patriarchal society, so you're just seen
as this man made of steel. Nothing can harm you,
nothing can break you. You're supposed to hold everything together
and it's all that's the foundation that has been laid
(09:54):
for us growing up. And even if we do try
to say ah, no, we can't do can't say that.
Even our own generation was still personate down to younger generations.
So we need to teach kids from a very young
age that it is okay to talk about how you feel,
no matter your gender, better with your male, whether your female.
(10:15):
If you're not okay talk And also as a society,
we need to learn to listen. That is a skill
most would not have. There are two things people should
be taught growing up, two very important skills, listening and
having empathy. You should be able to listen and be empathy.
If you cannot you have those two skills, you can
(10:35):
never be able to help someone because in every situation
you face, if you cannot listen to what I'm saying
and you cannot be empathetic and put yourself in my shoes, everything.
You're going to be defensive. You're going to say, I'm
that got giants. What you're going to say, I don't
know what I'm talking about. Your grade to say, ah,
you do it on purpose. You will never truly understand
(10:56):
where I am coming from. And unfortunately, men are disadvantaged.
No one can be empathetic to a man. I mean,
you walk around, You've got muscles. You know, if you
don't have muscles or I wound upturning mammonia, but you
have these muscles, and we see you as the strong person.
You know, if a thief comes in, this person I'm
(11:18):
calling is my dad or my brother. So if I
didn't see you breaking down, it becomes a problem mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah. Yeah. So it's our perception as society as to
what these people should be like, right, and this is
obviously something that has been both over time. I mean,
it didn't just appear overnight. So in the same way,
it's not something that's going to go away overnight. We
have to continuously train ourselves to be able to listen
and give men the empathy that they need and deserve
(11:47):
when it comes to mental health issues and how they're
feeling and things they're going through.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Right, Definitely, definitely we need to be open to hearing
what they're saying. We need to ask how they are feeling.
Ask how your brother is feeling, Ask how your father
is feeling. Ask your male friend. Do not just assume,
don't assume, never make and he's a man after all, way,
(12:13):
exactly all right. When I was in my first year,
my lecture used to say, if you're going to make assumptions,
you're making a fool of both yourself and the person
you're talking to. To always get clarity, very very powerful.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
And another issue as well when it comes to mental
health is as as African children just not being able
to open up to our parents as well about things
we're going through. You find that many times the response
is like, ah, you're complaining. Back in my day, we
used to walk fifty kilometers across a river invested with
crocodiles to get to school. And you know, it's like
(12:49):
now they're comparing what they went through with what we
are going through, and it then come across as belittling
our emotions. So also in that same vain, how do
we tackle bad issue of the fact that sometimes we
want to open up to our parents, but they don't
take our mental health issues and our concerns seriously.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
This is when advocacy comes in and parents need to
be taught about mental health issues. Parents need to be
taught how to listen. They actually need to see the
adverts they if they use Facebook more, we need to
see those sponsored adverts about mental health and telling them
that this is how you should listen to your child,
this is how you should treat your child when she's
(13:30):
in need or he is in need. So parents actually
need to be taught how to talk to their children
because it's very difficult. Not recent, I think about a
month ago or uh, yeah, it must be a month ago.
On Twitter, there was this story that was trending about
day drape about if you go for a sleepover. I
(13:54):
don't know if you saw it. A young lady went
for a sleepover and then she was raised by her
boyfriend and many people were like, oh, if you go
for a sleepover, what is that? And the best friend
is done that I was saying these things. The young
girl couldn't even open up to her mother that mama
in Nini, I went to my boyfriend's house. And when
(14:15):
I went to my boyfriend's house, he raped me. She
couldn't talk about that, She couldn't say any of those things. Instead,
she went to a best friend who is also the
same age as What is.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
She going to do with that type of story?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
So, as a mother, you need to be with your mother,
female child. You need to be able to communicate with
your child. Father, male child, you need to be able
to communicate with your child. I'm using gender because what
you experience as a woman, sometimes you cannot go to
a man man certain things that you even as a man,
(14:49):
there's certain things you experience and you need that male
figure to give you guidance, whether it's your sexuality, emotions.
You know, maybe perhaps with you're talking about career and
all those other things, yes, but if we're talking about
biology for women, you know, growing up, once I start puberty,
I want to understand what's going on. You know, once
(15:10):
you start your mainstruation's or your mother sits you down
and tells you this is what's up. So you need
to have you need to be open as a mother
to open to your door to talk to your daughter,
and as a father to talk to your son without
being judgmental.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
Because once you need to save.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Exactly in our homes. We need safe spaces in our homes.
We need safe spaces in schools, we need safe spaces
in our workplaces. You need a safe space every way.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Mm hmmm. Yeah, that's very insightful, and I think it's
really great to talk to someone who does this professionally.
You know, who has actually graduated. I'm speaking as though
it is because it is who has already.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Graduated in a degree. Yes, I the star.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
You know, we know that the information that we're getting
is solid, and we're really grateful to be able to
talk to you about such important issues. Because people the
moment they feel a pain in their stomach, you know,
they rush to the pharmacy or to the doctor to
find out what's wrong, But the moment emotions off. You know,
you don't necessarily give it the attention it deserves. So
(16:18):
things like this give people that insight into what exactly
could be going on, and that it's okay to not
be okay, as they popularly say, you know, and you
can get help and it doesn't make you any less
of a person, any less of a woman, any less
of a man. You know, you're just a person that
needs help. Right So anyway, I saw something on your
(16:41):
Instagram and I was just wondering. So I saw you
posted a Chelsea lineup today before the game.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yes, and as.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
A fellow Chelsea fan, I just wanted to know, like,
are you like a serious, serious soccer fan? Were one
of those Wait, you just post the line up just
so they see that? Maybe we should know some soccer
you know, I'm actually.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
A serious Chelsea fan. You know with soccer, I get
so emotional soccer.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
Oh yes, well that I get so.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Like especially with Manchester fans. When I start having a conversation,
I get so angry.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
You know.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Some friendships can even end for like a week.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Like we can't be friends anymore.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Like just when we pose our friendships, especially when we
have those Arsenal versus Chelsea manches, Yeah, we pose those
relationships like.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Just don't talk to me for the sake of our relationship.
Don't talk to me, don't write about me on your status. Okay,
we'll talk about this when the game is over. Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
And I'm not happy with the school like today we were,
I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
A drawer of all things, of all things, but anyways,
it's better than a lost I guess what can we do?
All right, that's so awesome. That's so awesome. That's awesome.
So I have a couple of fun questions for you.
And the only rule that is here for this set
of questions is that you have to answer within five seconds. Okay,
you can do that. There are plenty of pressure. We
(18:22):
apply pressure always.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
I think I can do it.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
All right, all right, are you ready?
Speaker 3 (18:28):
I am?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Okay? So first question? Coffee or tea?
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Coffee?
Speaker 2 (18:34):
All right? And what's your favorite song to listen to
when you're in your fields? You know, and everybody sleeping,
you're just they're thinking about life.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
I usually think about love. Yeah, anything to do with Sandsmith.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
All right, anything to do with sand Smith. So there's
the Sandsmith people in this, that Drake people. I'm personally
one of those Drake people, you know. Just saying, so,
how many kids do you want to have?
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I want to have three. The first two have to
be twins.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Though, oh yes, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
And from those three, would you rather have all boys
or all girls?
Speaker 3 (19:12):
All girls?
Speaker 2 (19:13):
All right? All right, all right? What's your dream travel destination?
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Grease?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Grease, such a beautiful place. Anyways, anyways, let me get
out of that and The last question is what is
your favorite fast food restaurant?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Huh it has to be chicken in Hey. Yes, what
can I do?
Speaker 1 (19:31):
The girls, the girls with vision.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
This is how we know we have visions for your life.
When you make such wise choices, they you know that
you know the future of the country is in good hands,
very good hands.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's safe, the future safe.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Don't worry.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
I got you guys.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Anyways, thank you so much sat Off for joining us today.
It was such a pleasure having you and learning from
you and just having fun with you. You're such an
amazing spirit. Thank you so much much for being here.
Do you have any closing remarks for our listeners?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Firstly, thank you so much for having me. And I
just want to say that do not be afraid to
ask for help. It's okay not to be okay. There
are two good organizations that you can approach if you
ever want to talk. The first one is Friendship Bench.
The second one is Phoebe. They are amazing. If you
(20:25):
have any problems, you can get free online services from them.
The information is on my Instagram page and also on
my Twitter page at Tana underscorch Goata. So never be
afraid to talk about how you're feeling. It's okay not
to be okay.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
All right. Thank you so much, Tana, and thank you
so much to all you who are listening. Until next time,
see U,
What's Up Everybody? Welcome to the Chatroom, a podcast dedicated
with having interviews with upcoming stars and influencers of our generation.
Please follow us on Facebook and Instagram at the chatroom
dot tcr and on Twitter at the chatroom underscore TCR. Also,
don't forget to become one of our valued Patreon members,
which allows you to unlock exclusive content while also supporting
(00:25):
this podcast. Enjoy the episode.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
What's Up Everybody? Welcome back to the chat Room Today.
Your host is Martina and I've got the wonderful Tonight's
what Chikara here with me. She's a young powerhouse who's
passionate about mental health. She's about to graduate with a
bachelor's degree in psychology from the University of Zimbabwe. So,
without further ado Tanatso how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (00:49):
Hey, Martina? How are you?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
I'm great? Thank you? How are you?
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I'm okay, I'm good. It's been raining a lot, so
that's a bit much, but I'm okay.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
Yeah. That's the thing with us. When it wasn't raining,
we were complaining. Now it's raining, we're complaining as well.
But other than that, have you had a good Saturday?
What did you get up to today.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Do you want today?
Speaker 2 (01:11):
I had?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
I made a cheeseboard with.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
My friend, Yes, rich anti vibes.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
So it's about yet exactly are your lord?
Speaker 2 (01:22):
You know?
Speaker 3 (01:23):
The life we want?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Soft life, yes, self life always, that's what it's about.
So anyway, let's just jump straight into the questions. A
couple of questions that I have for you that will
just allow us to interact and allow people to get
to know you better. So, according to your Instagram bio,
you carry quite a number of caps like you're out
here representing the females, like you're a director at my
(01:48):
State of Mind organization and a presenter for pachausim right,
and you also have a block.
Speaker 3 (01:54):
That's true. That's true.
Speaker 2 (01:56):
So I guess first question is with all these caps,
how do you man your time and the stress that
comes with everything.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
That's very difficult if I'm being honest, But I can imagining.
What keeps me going, you know, are the goals that
I've set for myself. I want to be the best
version of myself in every possible way. So when I
get tired, I remind myself that, oh tonight, So getting tired,
my dear, no one is going to put.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
You haven't even started.
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You have to move. So I just have to remind
myself that, you know, the finish line is still very far.
But at the same time, I want to enjoy the
process and enjoy the journey, so I push myself.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Yeah, a lot of people actually focus more on the
destination than the actual journey of getting where they want
to go.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
Right exactly. That's very true, and that's it's not worth
it if you're not going to enjoy the journey. Because
if I reach my destination at forty and I'm twenty two,
that means I've missed at thirty eight years of my
life being miserable. That's a long time.
Speaker 2 (03:04):
That is a very long time.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Thirty So it's eighteen years of eighteen years, eighteen eighteen,
not thirty eight, but eighteen. Okay, yes, got.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
It, ma'am, got it. So anyway, when you pursued psychology
as a degree, what was the end goal? Was the
end goal to be sitting across someone in a room
and saying, tell me about your childhood or you know
those other things that we stereotypically thik therapists do. Like,
what was the end goal for you when you said
I'm going to study psychology.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
Funny story, Actually I didn't want to do psychology. I
didn't even know psychology was a thing in university when
I was in lower six. I wanted to do law.
That's what I wanted. Oh okay, And in my head
I had planned it. I was going to be a lawyer,
was going to be an act kid. I looked for
(04:01):
mentors that way, in the field of floor people to
tell me how I can go about it. I started
working towards getting fifteen points because I knew that I
was going to go to the University of Zimbabwe.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
And they're very demanded in terms of art like law.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Hey, exactly, So I knew if I wanted to get in,
I had to get fifteen points. And I worked. I
worked hard, Matina.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
Like I can imagine help.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
And I didn't have fifteen points. I thought my world
was over, Like.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
I thought my life was like just out of curiousity,
like it wasn't fifteen, but what was it?
Speaker 3 (04:37):
It wasn't fifteen, it was eleven and I was four
points off. And do you know when you like you
were upset, when you put I was beyond. I was
not only upset, I was broken, like I felt like
I was nothing. I felt like I had failed. I
didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to start.
I didn't even my head was I was so confused.
(04:58):
And I'm really appreciative the family I have, my uncle,
my parents, and my brother and I had a conversation
with my uncle and he said to me, Tonata, you
did very well, and as a family, we're proud of you.
If you're not happy, you've got options. Option number one,
you go back and you write your A levels and
you try to get those Siftain points. You write it again,
(05:20):
or you move on with what you have, You build
on that, you look for ways to then do law. Afterwards,
you do another degree. How are you going to work
around it? And then my brother told me about psychology
and he told me, oh, have you ever heard of psychology?
Do you know human resources? You know my human resources
He was working adults at the time. He was like,
(05:41):
my human resources director had a psych bachelors and psychology,
you can pursue that. And then another road was you
can start psychology, do your first year, get really good
points and see if you can swap okay, and then
do law you're in the next year. I was like,
I'm going to work with that. I'm going to start
(06:03):
psychology work on it, and next year, when i'm starting
my second year, I'm going.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
To switch to law.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
The results exactly and switched to first year comes. I
go to school. I got my results in January. I
started that February. I went to university. It was a
different life. I was a chisy and it's an old
girls school. So seeing boys I was in rasis these
people I'm like, and I'm like, exactly, And you know,
(06:32):
when you're university, boys can visit girls. I'm like, excuse them,
what what's going on?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
What are you doing here?
Speaker 3 (06:40):
What are you doing? So it was just a different vibe.
I started doing psychology. The first test we wrote, I
was the highest in my class. I was like, what
is what's going on?
Speaker 2 (06:52):
This seems cool?
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Let me try it out. You're write your second test,
are you're killing it? My first myth I had five distinctions.
You go to the next and you've got three. The
next year. My whole second year I did twelf courses.
I had twelve distinction straight yes, And I was like, Okay,
I'm good at this program. I actually enjoy what I'm
being twitter. I enjoy the concepts. I want to know more.
(07:15):
I had this desire this, there was something in this drive,
this urge to know more. I want to understand what's
going on. And then I became a mental health advocate.
That's how I became a mental health advocate because I
wanted to understand what mental health was about and understand
why it's not being recognized in my country. With the
gap is why it's not being recognized in our homes,
(07:36):
in our in politics and law and schools and everything.
I wanted to understand and that is what pushed me
to become a mental advocate. So you know, the end
goal and I started psychology, was to actually swap but
now the end goal is to graduate dear my master's
and clinical Psychology, Open and Injury, oh that advocates for
(07:58):
mental health. That is where I see myself going and
actually have a firm practice, get my license and be
a certified clinical psychologist. So it started with swapping the
degree and ended with me actually understanding my purpose and
knowing what I'm supposed to do. It's all about finding
your purpose, especially in university.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Yeah, to know.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
What your purpose is within your program.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Definitely, and things have a funny way of working out.
I mean, you wanted to do law and become an advocate.
Now you're an advocate for mental health, so technically you
are not too far.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Thank you. This is why I like you.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
And you know, mental health is such a big issue,
especially in Africa. I believe right in Africa you find
that maybe it's not taken as seriously as in other continents,
especially for the male gender. From my own observations. Obviously,
as a person who's done the degree, you probably have
a different perspective. But the one question I have, and
a lot of people or often have, is how do
(09:01):
we tackle the issues of men fearing speaking up about
mental health issues because they don't want to be viewed
as being weak.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
You know what, Thank you so much for asking that question,
because this is a topic. It's an ongoing topic right now,
especially in Zimbabwe. After the death of Soldier Love Me
his soul rest in peace. You see people that are
talking about how he spoke about how we felt in
his music. You have people that are saying that he
didn't get the attention he needed before and people ignored him.
(09:31):
And I feel like that comes from the whole idea
that a man is strong. A man cannot cry, a
man cannot complain. You're at the head of the house.
We live in a patriarchal society, so you're just seen
as this man made of steel. Nothing can harm you,
nothing can break you. You're supposed to hold everything together
and it's all that's the foundation that has been laid
(09:54):
for us growing up. And even if we do try
to say ah, no, we can't do can't say that.
Even our own generation was still personate down to younger generations.
So we need to teach kids from a very young
age that it is okay to talk about how you feel,
no matter your gender, better with your male, whether your female.
(10:15):
If you're not okay talk And also as a society,
we need to learn to listen. That is a skill
most would not have. There are two things people should
be taught growing up, two very important skills, listening and
having empathy. You should be able to listen and be empathy.
If you cannot you have those two skills, you can
(10:35):
never be able to help someone because in every situation
you face, if you cannot listen to what I'm saying
and you cannot be empathetic and put yourself in my shoes, everything.
You're going to be defensive. You're going to say, I'm
that got giants. What you're going to say, I don't
know what I'm talking about. Your grade to say, ah,
you do it on purpose. You will never truly understand
(10:56):
where I am coming from. And unfortunately, men are disadvantaged.
No one can be empathetic to a man. I mean,
you walk around, You've got muscles. You know, if you
don't have muscles or I wound upturning mammonia, but you
have these muscles, and we see you as the strong person.
You know, if a thief comes in, this person I'm
(11:18):
calling is my dad or my brother. So if I
didn't see you breaking down, it becomes a problem mm hmm.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Yeah. Yeah. So it's our perception as society as to
what these people should be like, right, and this is
obviously something that has been both over time. I mean,
it didn't just appear overnight. So in the same way,
it's not something that's going to go away overnight. We
have to continuously train ourselves to be able to listen
and give men the empathy that they need and deserve
(11:47):
when it comes to mental health issues and how they're
feeling and things they're going through.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Right, Definitely, definitely we need to be open to hearing
what they're saying. We need to ask how they are feeling.
Ask how your brother is feeling, Ask how your father
is feeling. Ask your male friend. Do not just assume,
don't assume, never make and he's a man after all, way,
(12:13):
exactly all right. When I was in my first year,
my lecture used to say, if you're going to make assumptions,
you're making a fool of both yourself and the person
you're talking to. To always get clarity, very very powerful.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
And another issue as well when it comes to mental
health is as as African children just not being able
to open up to our parents as well about things
we're going through. You find that many times the response
is like, ah, you're complaining. Back in my day, we
used to walk fifty kilometers across a river invested with
crocodiles to get to school. And you know, it's like
(12:49):
now they're comparing what they went through with what we
are going through, and it then come across as belittling
our emotions. So also in that same vain, how do
we tackle bad issue of the fact that sometimes we
want to open up to our parents, but they don't
take our mental health issues and our concerns seriously.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
This is when advocacy comes in and parents need to
be taught about mental health issues. Parents need to be
taught how to listen. They actually need to see the
adverts they if they use Facebook more, we need to
see those sponsored adverts about mental health and telling them
that this is how you should listen to your child,
this is how you should treat your child when she's
(13:30):
in need or he is in need. So parents actually
need to be taught how to talk to their children
because it's very difficult. Not recent, I think about a
month ago or uh, yeah, it must be a month ago.
On Twitter, there was this story that was trending about
day drape about if you go for a sleepover. I
(13:54):
don't know if you saw it. A young lady went
for a sleepover and then she was raised by her
boyfriend and many people were like, oh, if you go
for a sleepover, what is that? And the best friend
is done that I was saying these things. The young
girl couldn't even open up to her mother that mama
in Nini, I went to my boyfriend's house. And when
(14:15):
I went to my boyfriend's house, he raped me. She
couldn't talk about that, She couldn't say any of those things. Instead,
she went to a best friend who is also the
same age as What is.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
She going to do with that type of story?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
So, as a mother, you need to be with your mother,
female child. You need to be able to communicate with
your child. Father, male child, you need to be able
to communicate with your child. I'm using gender because what
you experience as a woman, sometimes you cannot go to
a man man certain things that you even as a man,
(14:49):
there's certain things you experience and you need that male
figure to give you guidance, whether it's your sexuality, emotions.
You know, maybe perhaps with you're talking about career and
all those other things, yes, but if we're talking about
biology for women, you know, growing up, once I start puberty,
I want to understand what's going on. You know, once
(15:10):
you start your mainstruation's or your mother sits you down
and tells you this is what's up. So you need
to have you need to be open as a mother
to open to your door to talk to your daughter,
and as a father to talk to your son without
being judgmental.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
Because once you need to save.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Exactly in our homes. We need safe spaces in our homes.
We need safe spaces in schools, we need safe spaces
in our workplaces. You need a safe space every way.
Speaker 2 (15:40):
Mm hmmm. Yeah, that's very insightful, and I think it's
really great to talk to someone who does this professionally.
You know, who has actually graduated. I'm speaking as though
it is because it is who has already.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Graduated in a degree. Yes, I the star.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
You know, we know that the information that we're getting
is solid, and we're really grateful to be able to
talk to you about such important issues. Because people the
moment they feel a pain in their stomach, you know,
they rush to the pharmacy or to the doctor to
find out what's wrong, But the moment emotions off. You know,
you don't necessarily give it the attention it deserves. So
(16:18):
things like this give people that insight into what exactly
could be going on, and that it's okay to not
be okay, as they popularly say, you know, and you
can get help and it doesn't make you any less
of a person, any less of a woman, any less
of a man. You know, you're just a person that
needs help. Right So anyway, I saw something on your
(16:41):
Instagram and I was just wondering. So I saw you
posted a Chelsea lineup today before the game.
Speaker 3 (16:49):
Yes, and as.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
A fellow Chelsea fan, I just wanted to know, like,
are you like a serious, serious soccer fan? Were one
of those Wait, you just post the line up just
so they see that? Maybe we should know some soccer
you know, I'm actually.
Speaker 3 (17:08):
A serious Chelsea fan. You know with soccer, I get
so emotional soccer.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
Oh yes, well that I get so.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Like especially with Manchester fans. When I start having a conversation,
I get so angry.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
You know.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
Some friendships can even end for like a week.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Like we can't be friends anymore.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Like just when we pose our friendships, especially when we
have those Arsenal versus Chelsea manches, Yeah, we pose those
relationships like.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Just don't talk to me for the sake of our relationship.
Don't talk to me, don't write about me on your status. Okay,
we'll talk about this when the game is over. Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
And I'm not happy with the school like today we were,
I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
A drawer of all things, of all things, but anyways,
it's better than a lost I guess what can we do?
All right, that's so awesome. That's so awesome. That's awesome.
So I have a couple of fun questions for you.
And the only rule that is here for this set
of questions is that you have to answer within five seconds. Okay,
you can do that. There are plenty of pressure. We
(18:22):
apply pressure always.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
I think I can do it.
Speaker 2 (18:26):
All right, all right, are you ready?
Speaker 3 (18:28):
I am?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Okay? So first question? Coffee or tea?
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Coffee?
Speaker 2 (18:34):
All right? And what's your favorite song to listen to
when you're in your fields? You know, and everybody sleeping,
you're just they're thinking about life.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
I usually think about love. Yeah, anything to do with Sandsmith.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
All right, anything to do with sand Smith. So there's
the Sandsmith people in this, that Drake people. I'm personally
one of those Drake people, you know. Just saying, so,
how many kids do you want to have?
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I want to have three. The first two have to
be twins.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Though, oh yes, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
And from those three, would you rather have all boys
or all girls?
Speaker 3 (19:12):
All girls?
Speaker 2 (19:13):
All right? All right, all right? What's your dream travel destination?
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Grease?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Grease, such a beautiful place. Anyways, anyways, let me get
out of that and The last question is what is
your favorite fast food restaurant?
Speaker 3 (19:27):
Huh it has to be chicken in Hey. Yes, what
can I do?
Speaker 1 (19:31):
The girls, the girls with vision.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
This is how we know we have visions for your life.
When you make such wise choices, they you know that
you know the future of the country is in good hands,
very good hands.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's safe, the future safe.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Don't worry.
Speaker 3 (19:46):
I got you guys.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Anyways, thank you so much sat Off for joining us today.
It was such a pleasure having you and learning from
you and just having fun with you. You're such an
amazing spirit. Thank you so much much for being here.
Do you have any closing remarks for our listeners?
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Firstly, thank you so much for having me. And I
just want to say that do not be afraid to
ask for help. It's okay not to be okay. There
are two good organizations that you can approach if you
ever want to talk. The first one is Friendship Bench.
The second one is Phoebe. They are amazing. If you
(20:25):
have any problems, you can get free online services from them.
The information is on my Instagram page and also on
my Twitter page at Tana underscorch Goata. So never be
afraid to talk about how you're feeling. It's okay not
to be okay.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
All right. Thank you so much, Tana, and thank you
so much to all you who are listening. Until next time,
see U,
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Football’s funniest family duo — Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs — team up to provide next-level access to life in the league as it unfolds. The two brothers and Super Bowl champions drop weekly insights about the weekly slate of games and share their INSIDE perspectives on trending NFL news and sports headlines. They also endlessly rag on each other as brothers do, chat the latest in pop culture and welcome some very popular and well-known friends to chat with them. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. Follow New Heights on the Wondery App, YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free, and get exclusive content on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And join our new membership for a unique fan experience by going to the New Heights YouTube channel now!