Gold Doesn't Work–Your Money Should

Gold is back in the headlines, but should it be in your portfolio? Don and Tom take a fresh (and frequently hilarious) look at the shiny metal that never seems to deliver. From Fort Knox to Costco’s gold bar rush, they trace gold’s lackluster long-term returns and its overhyped reputation as a hedge. They break down why physical gold fails as an investment, why GLD is better (but still meh), and why long-term investors might already have enough exposure through diversified funds. Plus: a Medicare premium surprise fix, the case of the copper penny, and a brief but loud murder of crows. 0:04 Gilded White House jokes lead into a serious look at gold 1:00 Don and Tom reunite—same page, same side, same skepticism on gold 1:57 Yahoo Finance: gold’s biggest quarter since 1986 2:34 Gold’s ancient history and the Second Boer War detour 3:48 What’s a hedge, really? Gold vs. inflation 4:21 15-year performance: gold vs. S&P 500 5:40 1980 to 2024: gold’s long climb back to break even 7:10 110 years of gold prices—brief spikes, long plateaus 8:54 The emotional allure of physical gold (and why it’s irrational) 9:44 Physical gold: storage, insurance, and Armageddon prep 11:10 GLD: a better, but still limited, gold investment 12:49 Gold’s chart pattern: flat, spike, crash, repeat 13:26 Why gold isn’t a real investment—it doesn’t grow 14:16 Gold mining stocks as an indirect investment 15:02 Surprise! Taiwan Semi uses gold in chip production 15:34 Crypto vs. gold: at least gold is pretty 16:07 Atomic number nerdiness and family science failures 16:39 Q&A: Will one-year income spike raise Part B premiums? 18:06 IRMAA form and exceptions for life-changing events 20:02 Medicare Part B premium ranges and adjustments 21:10 Listener Perry wonders: if pennies go away, can we melt them? 22:34 Today's pennies: mostly zinc, not a copper mine in your jar 23:56 Will the penny ever die? Bureaucratic inertia says no 24:14 DIY penny production? Just don’t. 25:16 Podcast etymology: Apple vs. The Guardian debate 26:51 Outro chaos: crows, jokes, and how to ask your questions Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices