May 22, 2025 • 28 mins
A comedy series featuring a spirited young woman navigating life's challenges with wit and charm, often finding herself in humorous situations. Her adventures are both entertaining and endearing.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
I have, babe, say, how about ah?
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Does that answer your question? Buddy?
Speaker 1 (00:15):
The Adventures of Mazie starring and Southern. You all remember
Metro Golden Mayor's famous Mazie pictures, Just the moment you'll
hear Mazie in radio, starring the same glamorous star you
all went to see and loved on the screen. And Southern,
But first you're announcer.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
And now here is Anne Southern as razy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yep, I'm mazing, like the fella said Razy Revere. And
I'm a showgirl, and I'm a work show girl. I
just quit a nightclub because the manager wanted me to
show a little too much, So I just packed my
old black suitcase and hit the road. It was way
out west, where men are supposed to be only for
miles and miles. I didn't see any then, As luck
(01:39):
would have it, I stumbled up to a farmhouse and
the farmer, a really nice widow gentleman named Jed Parker,
surprised me by offering me a job, and I surprised
him by taking it. I'd never worked on a farm before,
and I never realized what a leisurely live farm work is.
To cook the meals, draw the water from the well,
feed the chickens, clean the house you're in, the butters,
(02:00):
grub the laundry, and simple little chores like that. Well
you'll have to pardon me now, folks, you gotta get
to work.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
How's it coming, Maizie?
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Oh good evening, mister Parker.
Speaker 4 (02:11):
Evening, Maze, it's morning it is?
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And how come it's so dark?
Speaker 4 (02:16):
You still got your eyes closed?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Oh yes, I'm still now used to getting up the
early boss.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
I know if farming is hard work, Maje, but it's
done you a lot of good. It's making a new
woman out of you.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Well, you're you're very kind, mister Parker.
Speaker 4 (02:30):
You're the one that's kind.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Mazy.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You can stay here as long as you want. I
like you, and Timmy worships the ground you walk on.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
And I think that son of yours is a wonderful boy.
Handsome too, You really think so, Mazy. I mean, Timmy,
you got everything that Van Johnson has, and I pity
the poor girls around here when you start breaking it.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
In Ben Johnson's cares. Oh you're just laughing at me.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
No we're not, Jimmy, You're my little sweetheart.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
I am God.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Well stop blushing sweetheart, and go down and get the mail.
Speaker 5 (03:04):
Yes, oh, yes, sure would you like to walk down
to the mailbox with me, Maysie? I want to ask
you something, well, sort of personal.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Well, I'm afraid it'll have to keep a wo out, Timmy.
I still got these rugs to beat.
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Oh all, okay, Mazie, I'll be right back, amazing.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Let me beat those drugs for you. You must be tired.
Speaker 5 (03:24):
Uh uh.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Beating rugs is the one thing I enjoy. I keep
imagining each rug is a personal enemy of mind.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Well, okay, then I'll get to work.
Speaker 5 (03:33):
Hmm.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Now on with the fun my agent. They that sold
me these tight shoes. The cricket that kept me up
last night.
Speaker 6 (03:44):
Ouch.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Oh, I'm sorry, cricket. I didn't think you were listening.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
Miss. I'm not a cricket. I'm Judge Snodgrass.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Oh I'm terribly sorry, jadge that you shouldn't hide behind rugs.
Where did I hit.
Speaker 5 (03:56):
You in the never mind? Never mind?
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Oh that low, Well that's what you get for snooping.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
I was not snooping, miss. I've got the farm the
other side of the fence. See, I ain't seen you
around before. You ain't jet Parker's knew. Why pay any chance?
Speaker 8 (04:14):
Are you?
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Nope?
Speaker 5 (04:16):
One of his kinfolks?
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Maybe nope, I'm just staying here.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
I see.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
No, you don't see now what's on your nasty old mind?
Speaker 7 (04:27):
You tell Jet Parker for me that I won't have
his hens laying eggs on my property.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Oh no, you, sonny, what I've seen of hens when
they're going to lay an egg, They're going to lay
an egg.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
You ain't heard.
Speaker 7 (04:38):
The end of this, young woman. I better get back
to my place, moon and air is not good for me.
Got a cold in my head and I don't want
it to get down to my chest.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Well, why don't you just tie a knot in your neck?
Speaker 5 (04:53):
I'm back, Mazy. See he is not Judge Snodgrass walking
down the path.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Yeah, seems like the judge in our hands. Don't see
eye that eye? Oh? Any of that male for me? Timmy?
Speaker 5 (05:03):
Oh? Who know? Just the weekly paper and some bills
and my dancing lesson.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Dancing lesson.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Yeah, well it's it's dancing that I really wanted to
ask you about, Mazie. Oh yeah, but when you do
me the honor to accompany me to our high school
dance next Saturday night at eight thirty formal.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Oh, well, Timmy, I love to but she think of
the difference in our ages?
Speaker 5 (05:26):
Oh what difference does a year or two make? Mazie?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
A year or two? Oh, Timmy, I love you, you
do honest?
Speaker 5 (05:37):
When did you first know? I mean, am I am?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
I interrupting something? Oja?
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh Timmy, your voice suddenly got older. Oh hello, I don't.
Speaker 6 (05:46):
Think we've met Ronald Thornton a neighbor, miss? And how
do you do well?
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Likewise? Don't you know? I am lazy for beer already?
So you ain't? I mean, aren't a farmer?
Speaker 5 (05:58):
Are you amazing about the dance?
Speaker 6 (06:00):
Well?
Speaker 9 (06:00):
I came to this country principle to study American agricultural methods,
mostly animal husband.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
I never knew animals actually had husbands. I just thought
they sort of ad lib those things.
Speaker 5 (06:12):
Mazie, I sure like to take you to that dance.
Speaker 6 (06:15):
That's a joke, I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
No, I mean it. I'd like her to go with me.
Speaker 9 (06:18):
No, I meant about the animal husband rich in it. Oh,
I may have dropped over to find out if you've
seeing her?
Speaker 5 (06:23):
Oh no, nope, Her old lady keeps her under lock
and key maze about you two under lock and key Ronald,
they're having a three piece bandit.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
The girl I love, mister Joan Hooper. It's I've lost
cause I'm afraid.
Speaker 5 (06:35):
But why, I'm sure Mayzie likes to dance.
Speaker 6 (06:38):
I mean my chances of marrying Joan.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Why Ronald. If the boy and girl are in love,
that's all the matters, I always say.
Speaker 5 (06:45):
That's what I always say too. This means an awful
lot to me, Mayzie.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
I know it does, and we must do something about it.
Speaker 5 (06:52):
Yeah, sure, Mazie. When it's the real thing, we must
make the most of each precious moment.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
That's right. We should bring Ronald.
Speaker 5 (07:00):
We own together, Ronald and June Paul.
Speaker 6 (07:04):
Frankly, I'm going a bit out of my mind.
Speaker 5 (07:06):
You ain't the only one. May here just a minute, fly,
Oh all right, I'll see you later.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Amazing Now, Ronald, if you don't mind my button in
what's the score between you and this Joan?
Speaker 5 (07:21):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (07:21):
Well, miss Vera, I suppose I'm too madly in love
with Joan to hav any pride left. If only I
could see her once in a while.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Gosh, the love bug Shore has bitten a big chunk
out of you.
Speaker 9 (07:31):
Yes, but but Janes's mother simply abhors the idea of
her daughter marrying a mere farmer.
Speaker 6 (07:36):
The Hoopers are sort of the local upper crust, you see.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Oh what's the upper crust anyway? Just a bunch of
crumbs held together by their own dough. Say what that
Jon needs a little sponge? Talked into her? What's your
phone number?
Speaker 6 (07:49):
I couldn't telephone her. Mother knows my voice, but she.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Don't know mine. And I've got an idea how to
get her out of the house. But but there's no
buts about it. You want to have children someday, don't you?
Speaker 6 (08:00):
Yes, of course, but Missus Hooper would never forgive Joan
and me if we.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Got married, and your children would never forgive if you didn't. Hello, Hello,
I would like to talk to missus J. Crosley Hooper.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Please, this is her, I mean she?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Who is this?
Speaker 10 (08:27):
I mean whom?
Speaker 5 (08:29):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Well, this is the Society editor of Whom's Who? I
mean Who's whom? We are inaugurating a new supplement to
our publication, Missus Hooper, entitle the most outstanding diptats of
the year, and your daughter Joan has been selected as
one of them.
Speaker 10 (08:45):
My kid, I mean my daughter, one of the most
outstanding deputies of the year.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Whoa, I mean really.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
It's really we should like to make a picture of
Joan to publish in our forthcoming edition. Would you have
her come out to the Jet Parker Farm immediately? I
mean immediately the.
Speaker 11 (09:04):
Jed Parker phone.
Speaker 10 (09:06):
But why not take the picture right here in our
one hundred and seventy eight thousand dollars home, surrounded by
the culture amongst which she was born.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Oh that's a very good question, missus Hooper. Have her
at the Parker Farm immediately, that is, unless you don't
care to have Jon's picture of parent print.
Speaker 11 (09:24):
Oh sure, sure, keep your pants, I mean, don't be impatient.
Joan will be there. All revolve my dear as friend.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
You know any when are you gonna fool me? Good
bye now, Joan?
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Joan't come downstairs at what? For just a minute? Mother?
Speaker 6 (09:42):
What's all a rocus about Gussie Crossley?
Speaker 10 (09:45):
How many times must I tell you to desist from
calling me Gussie?
Speaker 11 (09:49):
You know what? You should call me?
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Yeah, but I don't like to do it in front
of our kids.
Speaker 10 (09:54):
I mean, now that we're accepted into society, I wish
you'd refer to me as Augustine and take your feet
off the dining room table.
Speaker 6 (10:02):
Don't get all head up, Gussie. I got my shoes off.
Speaker 11 (10:05):
And I please, Crosley, don't be vulgar.
Speaker 10 (10:08):
It's our Joan. They want her picture took. Is one
of the most outstanding deputans of the season.
Speaker 9 (10:13):
Well, gee, what do you know, our little stinker in
society is making her debut.
Speaker 11 (10:19):
Not debut, egghead, it's debut debut. Yes, anyway, this will
be wonderful for Joan.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
She'll meet new men.
Speaker 8 (10:27):
Now, look, Gussie, why do you have to interfere with
the poor kid's love life?
Speaker 11 (10:31):
Pooh, marry a farmer.
Speaker 10 (10:34):
Our Jonie will be brought up amongst culture, not agriculture.
Speaker 11 (10:38):
Think of our family.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Position, family position? What family position?
Speaker 3 (10:43):
Mine?
Speaker 11 (10:44):
Crosley? Naturally, after all, I was born with a silver
spoon in my.
Speaker 6 (10:49):
Mouth and a tin tray in your hands.
Speaker 12 (11:05):
Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie Darling, it's been so long. I didn't
dream that i'd find you here at the farm.
Speaker 6 (11:11):
What it's almost revealed? Idea, she brought us together.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Oh yeah, but the thing is to keep it together,
and there's one real yummy way marriage.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
Will you John?
Speaker 12 (11:19):
Oh Gie i'd loved her.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
But mother, what's that old crow got to do with it? Please?
Speaker 12 (11:23):
That old crow happens to be my mother. I mean, well,
despite what she's done, she still loves.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
Me, so do I, darling. Don't you want to marry me?
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I do, Ronnie.
Speaker 12 (11:33):
And the worst way, well, then.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Do it without your mother's consent. That's probably the worst way.
But well, why not you both old? Nah, aren't you?
I mean for a license.
Speaker 12 (11:42):
Well, I'm twenty eight and I'm almost eighteen. I'm seventeen
and seven eight.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Well that ain't exactly December and May wedding, but there
is a sizeable difference in your ages.
Speaker 12 (11:52):
Oh and you think that's not good.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Well, maybe I've done too much thinking. Look you two
wait here on in the barn and talk to Timmy
Parker and get an innocent five standards opinion. Jimmy, Oh,
Timmy here, I am mazy, h Timmy. I want to
talk to you about something.
Speaker 5 (12:15):
Very serious, something serious.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Yeah, how do you feel about marriage?
Speaker 5 (12:20):
Well? I think that huh me? Marriage?
Speaker 2 (12:25):
Yeah, I feel that that's the only answer to our
problem right now, don't you?
Speaker 5 (12:30):
But miss Revera, I mean, maze, this is so sudden.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Well, I know, Timmy, it was for me too.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
I'll have to ask my pop what he thinks first. Oh,
I know he'll bring up the matter of the difference
in ages.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
But that doesn't matter when two people both want each
other so desperately, does it?
Speaker 5 (12:46):
Doesn't it? I mean, of course it doesn't. Doesn't.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Well, that's a question I want you to answer, Timmy.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
Oh, I guess when it's bigger than both of us,
who are we to fight against it? Didn't?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
He answers yet?
Speaker 5 (12:59):
I guess so? But when?
Speaker 3 (13:02):
When?
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Right away? Of course?
Speaker 5 (13:04):
Right away?
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Sure, Timmy. What do people in this town, people madly
in love who can't wait do to get married quickly
without waiting for a license?
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Oh? They drive to quickly, judge Wiggins, there, don't ask
too many questions.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Good, but I'll go to Quigley all sure the far
of it, Joan, Ronald, You and I. That'll solve the
witness problem.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
Oh oh yeah, gotta have witnesses. I can be ready
as soon as I finish my algebra homework.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
So glad that you and I both see eye to
eye on this desperate step. Oh golly, Timmy, I'm so
happy about it. I could kiss you.
Speaker 5 (13:39):
Oh, please, Maisie. Not now, Later, when it'll be legal.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
The adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern will continue in
just a moment, and now back to amaze.
Speaker 13 (14:44):
M lot of the liberary arrangements in the feet. But
be follow this, sah body, we get out with the.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Baron judgecause I hope we're not keeping you up.
Speaker 14 (14:58):
We are do all my marry and right, but sleeper days?
Could you folks come back later to Judge.
Speaker 9 (15:10):
I'm sorry, old Chap, but we just couldn't wait, right John,
Oh no, darling just couldn't know.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
And I'm in a hurry too, Judge, So put some
toothpicks on your eyelidn't start?
Speaker 6 (15:18):
Well, we can't without Timmy. When is that boy? Where
is the other witness here?
Speaker 5 (15:24):
I am mazy. I was just making a just married
sign for the back of my I mean our geloppy.
I love tradition, Mazie. Don't you there here?
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Honey? Sure? Well we're ready, judge, Judge.
Speaker 12 (15:38):
Oh dear, he's going to sleep again.
Speaker 6 (15:40):
I said, Joe Chap, two, open your eyes and let's
have that it.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
I'll wake him up with his gabble.
Speaker 6 (15:46):
Ten dollars take your places.
Speaker 5 (15:52):
Okay, do I take the bride's hand?
Speaker 6 (15:55):
Judge, Well, hardly, old boy, I'll do that.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
You Oh naturally, Timmy. Then the ceremony goes on a
honeymoon with the bride.
Speaker 5 (16:02):
He goes say that's going a little too far, don't
you think so, Joan, Well, of.
Speaker 11 (16:09):
Course not, I expected you do.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
Jimmy, didn't your father tell you about the facts of life?
Speaker 5 (16:16):
Yeah, but gosh, he must have skipped something, Mazie. Won't
it be a little embarrassing to have Ronald along on
our honey Well, of.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Course, not, Timmy.
Speaker 12 (16:24):
You see our honeymoon, Timmy, I'm the one that's getting married.
Speaker 5 (16:30):
Oh gosh, I'm sorry, Joan, but Mazie asked me first.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
Oh I'm afraid there's been a mistake, Tonner. She's marrying me.
Speaker 5 (16:36):
Are you amazing?
Speaker 2 (16:37):
No, he means Joan, he and Joe, he and m.
Speaker 5 (16:41):
Oh oh, Shellyama, thank you.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
I'm sorry, Timmy. Timmy, you're not the groom. You're just
the best man, I mean, the best kid.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Shit, fine thing I had to put on my new
genes for nothing.
Speaker 6 (16:55):
Well, let's get home with the charge, judge.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
The judge hoop out, bit my lad, Yeah, wake.
Speaker 8 (17:01):
Up, yeah, dearly beloved, we are gathered together with the submerge.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
Hurry, young judge. I got to get back to high school,
and so does the bride.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
Timmy, the bride.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
How old are you, my dear?
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (17:20):
Oh, you have to be eighteen to get married. Not
you must have to consent to your parents.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Oh fine, well, miss how old are you?
Speaker 3 (17:29):
You?
Speaker 8 (17:30):
Seems to be a slight difference of opinion, So I'm
just in time.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Yeah, mister Parker, it's almost over.
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Jimmy, you're not marrying that that show person.
Speaker 6 (17:42):
What I say? Oh, you've got this thing all wrong.
It's that that that that actress.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
I've had all wrong.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
She's not going to marry my.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Son, mister Parks. Joan and Ronald that are getting married.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
Oh shall we start again?
Speaker 8 (17:56):
I'm a tired man, do you Joan?
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Hom go ahead, judge, do you?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Then they gave the concient e couldn't be married unless
it did. Joan's underage, you know, do you?
Speaker 6 (18:11):
Joe underage?
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Now look what you've done, mister Parker.
Speaker 12 (18:16):
Oh please, judge, please, I love it.
Speaker 6 (18:19):
I'm sorry, little girl, you come.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
Back when you're eight and now good night? Well dad,
you sure did it?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Oh, my mother will never give her content.
Speaker 12 (18:29):
She wants me to marry a blue blood.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Yeah, red clashed with her carpets.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
Oh geek, kids, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Well, mister Parker, I'm not through yet. Some way, I
don't know how I'm going to get these two kids
married if it has to be over your dead body,
and at the moment, that's a very tempting idea.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Crowsley, Jude.
Speaker 11 (18:58):
Listen to this telegram. Oh, isn't it too too thrilling?
Speaker 10 (19:02):
It's from Ronnie's sister, Lady Millicent.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Smite, smile.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
His sister is a lady.
Speaker 11 (19:07):
Yes, you lucky girl. And it seems that Ronnie is
really Lord Sir Baron Duke.
Speaker 5 (19:13):
Thornton, Lord Sir Baron Duke not Count, also.
Speaker 10 (19:17):
Otally boy count Sir French, and dear dear Ronnie is British.
Speaker 11 (19:22):
I never knew Rannie had assisted.
Speaker 10 (19:24):
Oh and an immensely wealthy one. The dame's loaded, I
mean quite well off. Listen to the rest of the wire.
I am passing through the colonies our route to South
Africa to visit the diamond mines.
Speaker 11 (19:37):
Mater and Peter left to me and break her. Drowsley,
didn't you learn anything at school. That's Latin for brothers.
Lady Milicent obviously has educated brain.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
But to me she sounds like a screwball.
Speaker 11 (19:53):
Jon. Dear, that is hardly the way to speak of
your future sister in law.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Tister in law?
Speaker 11 (19:58):
Oh you mean me and Ronnie? Oh mother exactly. Now
here's the rest of the telegram.
Speaker 10 (20:04):
Suggest you arrange wedding my brother and your daughter whilst
I am there. Will arrive at four, coming direct to
your residence. Your daughter is a very lucky girl, signed
Lady Milicent.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Smite Smite, She's lucky one.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Ronnie is the lucky one to get a girl like Joan.
Speaker 12 (20:22):
Oh who cares who's lucky as long as I'm going
to be with his Lloyd, Sir Baron Dukes Thornton. Well,
I'd better hurry and get into something nice for the wedding.
Speaker 11 (20:32):
Well, Courzy, aren't you going to get dressed for the wedding?
Speaker 6 (20:35):
Dressed?
Speaker 5 (20:36):
You?
Speaker 6 (20:36):
You mean the tie and everything?
Speaker 3 (20:38):
Yes?
Speaker 10 (20:39):
And where are your tails like you did at the
opening of the opera?
Speaker 5 (20:42):
And no brown shoes this time?
Speaker 8 (20:45):
Okay, all right.
Speaker 11 (20:47):
Oh darling.
Speaker 10 (20:48):
It'll be a beautiful ceremony and we'll have Dear, dear
Judge nodgrass performance.
Speaker 11 (20:54):
Oh, I know he'll be just delighted to meet Lady Millicent. Well, Cursey,
you haven't said a word about the lovely plans I have.
Aren't you going to say something?
Speaker 5 (21:07):
Rah?
Speaker 3 (21:08):
Rah rah, whoa, Oh it's her, I mean she Crosley.
Speaker 11 (21:26):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 12 (21:28):
How do I look?
Speaker 6 (21:29):
How could you look?
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Ronny here?
Speaker 11 (21:34):
Aren't you excited at the prospect of.
Speaker 6 (21:36):
Meeting your sister more than you know?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
I'm a little curious too, Malaby Millicent? Smile, smile, were
chry p pet bev off and all that sortthing.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
Ronnie my dad?
Speaker 9 (21:52):
Yeah, run the hello melicine dog is quite a surprise,
sing you, Yes is, isn't it?
Speaker 6 (22:00):
Jolly? Is seeing you again?
Speaker 9 (22:01):
Oh girl, I trust everything at the old castle of
ours is quite uh jolly.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
How are the moats?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
The moats, Oh they're fine. They send you their dearest regard,
you know, all sorts of greetings from your cronies. Nice
the square that's Leicester, Oh, yes, yes, Leicester sent in
regard to laid up the poor chat is at his
leg some game of spot Oh.
Speaker 11 (22:27):
Cricket, no broke it, broke it? Oh, such a delightful
sense of humor.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
So this is the lovely bride.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Oh, oh do you know I'm her mother?
Speaker 11 (22:43):
Oh and so young too?
Speaker 5 (22:46):
You do.
Speaker 11 (22:48):
This is the bride my daughter?
Speaker 3 (22:49):
Joan?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Did you do?
Speaker 13 (22:51):
Did you do?
Speaker 6 (22:52):
I'm an old man.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
You do?
Speaker 6 (22:55):
You do yourself?
Speaker 3 (22:56):
Put it there?
Speaker 5 (22:56):
Say is there?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
But what where?
Speaker 5 (22:59):
Oh?
Speaker 11 (23:00):
You mustn't mind my husband's lady smile. You'll see he
was raised on the ranch.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Will not say? Shall we get this wedding and whatnot?
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Over with?
Speaker 3 (23:09):
What? Yes?
Speaker 6 (23:10):
Yes, I believe I heard the judges.
Speaker 15 (23:11):
Car well up a moment ago, John smog Dross and
I'm here ready to perform the ceremony.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Hodie Crosley, Joan, that's not.
Speaker 11 (23:23):
This is Ronnie's sister from England. Lady Milicent smile a
rerue fair middle Lady Midicine, what are you doing with
Joan's veil over your face?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Were just the hard bad It's an off of the ceremony.
Now my face gets chilled and dropped.
Speaker 10 (23:39):
Well, Lady Minicon, I'll get you something else, a pillow perhaps, Oh, oh, don't.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Bother rarely the veil will do. We brace's quite used
to rushing at you now.
Speaker 6 (23:49):
Well, Joan needs that veil more than you.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
That's what you think.
Speaker 15 (23:53):
Nobody's holding up the wedding of my daughter to the
man she loves. Yeah, let's get it going. I gotta
get thee here's for another treatment. Some fresh girl hit
me plumb on my sacreliac over.
Speaker 6 (24:05):
At the Parkers this morning, I mean medicine. Let John
have the bail and let's go on with the wedding.
Our train leave shortly, yes, her honeymoon train. Yes, so
give us that veil you shouldn't have.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
If I ever see that girl again.
Speaker 3 (24:20):
I'll you.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Yes, Crassy, you shouldn't have judge not dress. You know
lady Melissa.
Speaker 5 (24:26):
I know her and believe me, she ain't no lady.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Now letting your old goat just because I happen to
be working at the Parker file.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
Speaker 11 (24:37):
I think I'm going to faint.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
She ain't royal too, but she did it for asthma.
Speaker 11 (24:42):
They're for Rannie and me.
Speaker 6 (24:43):
Yes, we love each other, missus Hooper.
Speaker 11 (24:45):
John will never marry this farmer, do you hear me?
Speaker 5 (24:48):
Never?
Speaker 3 (24:48):
Why heck she won't. That's the spirit, Pop Crossly, How
dare you talk like that?
Speaker 6 (24:54):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (24:55):
Gussie?
Speaker 6 (24:55):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (24:56):
Oh see here, miss Hooper.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
That's not that, would you lie to be a little angel?
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Well sure dead, oh.
Speaker 15 (25:04):
Crucer, you haven't spoken to me like that ever, and
I'm twenty years late.
Speaker 9 (25:12):
And we can be married, but you're done right, you can't, oh,
Joan Darling at last, Well, if.
Speaker 5 (25:18):
Missus Hooper's against it, I won't perform the ceremony.
Speaker 6 (25:20):
But we'll miss our trained No, you won't.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
We're all going back to Judge Wiggins open quickly in
a hurry, and Joan, yes, if we're ever going to
get Judge Wiggins through it, you'd better bring an alarm clock.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
In just a moment, we shall return to the Adventures
of Mazie. Now once again, here's crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Well, so Joan and Ronnie were married, and I sure
hope they live happily ever after, and they will have
to remember one important thing. It isn't the saying of
id with the wedding ceremony that's important. It's the things
they do after the counts. For instance, if you have
an argument with your wife and she's right, come to
her and admit it. But if she's wrong, take her
(26:48):
to the movie. Well, I got to hit the road again.
Living out in the opening for a City Girl like me.
All that health can kill a person. She is a
long way back to Brooklyn, especially if you're traveling by thumb. Well,
got a good going feet, Mush.
Speaker 6 (27:16):
You've just heard.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
The Adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern Mazie, was written
by Arthur Phillips. Original music was composed and conducted by
Harry Zimmerman. Supporting cast included b Benadera, Ben Wright, Hans Conried, Sheldon, Leonard,
will Wright, Earl Ross, Sammy Hill, and Sidney Miller. Jack
(27:39):
McCoy speaking
Speaker 3 (28:08):
Was La
I have, babe, say, how about ah?
Speaker 2 (00:09):
Does that answer your question? Buddy?
Speaker 1 (00:15):
The Adventures of Mazie starring and Southern. You all remember
Metro Golden Mayor's famous Mazie pictures, Just the moment you'll
hear Mazie in radio, starring the same glamorous star you
all went to see and loved on the screen. And Southern,
But first you're announcer.
Speaker 3 (01:12):
And now here is Anne Southern as razy.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Yep, I'm mazing, like the fella said Razy Revere. And
I'm a showgirl, and I'm a work show girl. I
just quit a nightclub because the manager wanted me to
show a little too much, So I just packed my
old black suitcase and hit the road. It was way
out west, where men are supposed to be only for
miles and miles. I didn't see any then, As luck
(01:39):
would have it, I stumbled up to a farmhouse and
the farmer, a really nice widow gentleman named Jed Parker,
surprised me by offering me a job, and I surprised
him by taking it. I'd never worked on a farm before,
and I never realized what a leisurely live farm work is.
To cook the meals, draw the water from the well,
feed the chickens, clean the house you're in, the butters,
(02:00):
grub the laundry, and simple little chores like that. Well
you'll have to pardon me now, folks, you gotta get
to work.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
How's it coming, Maizie?
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Oh good evening, mister Parker.
Speaker 4 (02:11):
Evening, Maze, it's morning it is?
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And how come it's so dark?
Speaker 4 (02:16):
You still got your eyes closed?
Speaker 2 (02:18):
Oh yes, I'm still now used to getting up the
early boss.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
I know if farming is hard work, Maje, but it's
done you a lot of good. It's making a new
woman out of you.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Well, you're you're very kind, mister Parker.
Speaker 4 (02:30):
You're the one that's kind.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Mazy.
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You can stay here as long as you want. I
like you, and Timmy worships the ground you walk on.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
And I think that son of yours is a wonderful boy.
Handsome too, You really think so, Mazy. I mean, Timmy,
you got everything that Van Johnson has, and I pity
the poor girls around here when you start breaking it.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
In Ben Johnson's cares. Oh you're just laughing at me.
Speaker 2 (02:55):
No we're not, Jimmy, You're my little sweetheart.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
I am God.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Well stop blushing sweetheart, and go down and get the mail.
Speaker 5 (03:04):
Yes, oh, yes, sure would you like to walk down
to the mailbox with me, Maysie? I want to ask
you something, well, sort of personal.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Well, I'm afraid it'll have to keep a wo out, Timmy.
I still got these rugs to beat.
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Oh all, okay, Mazie, I'll be right back, amazing.
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Let me beat those drugs for you. You must be tired.
Speaker 5 (03:24):
Uh uh.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Beating rugs is the one thing I enjoy. I keep
imagining each rug is a personal enemy of mind.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
Well, okay, then I'll get to work.
Speaker 5 (03:33):
Hmm.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Now on with the fun my agent. They that sold
me these tight shoes. The cricket that kept me up
last night.
Speaker 6 (03:44):
Ouch.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Oh, I'm sorry, cricket. I didn't think you were listening.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
Miss. I'm not a cricket. I'm Judge Snodgrass.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Oh I'm terribly sorry, jadge that you shouldn't hide behind rugs.
Where did I hit.
Speaker 5 (03:56):
You in the never mind? Never mind?
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Oh that low, Well that's what you get for snooping.
Speaker 7 (04:02):
I was not snooping, miss. I've got the farm the
other side of the fence. See, I ain't seen you
around before. You ain't jet Parker's knew. Why pay any chance?
Speaker 8 (04:14):
Are you?
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Nope?
Speaker 5 (04:16):
One of his kinfolks?
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Maybe nope, I'm just staying here.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
I see.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
No, you don't see now what's on your nasty old mind?
Speaker 7 (04:27):
You tell Jet Parker for me that I won't have
his hens laying eggs on my property.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
Oh no, you, sonny, what I've seen of hens when
they're going to lay an egg, They're going to lay
an egg.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
You ain't heard.
Speaker 7 (04:38):
The end of this, young woman. I better get back
to my place, moon and air is not good for me.
Got a cold in my head and I don't want
it to get down to my chest.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Well, why don't you just tie a knot in your neck?
Speaker 5 (04:53):
I'm back, Mazy. See he is not Judge Snodgrass walking
down the path.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Yeah, seems like the judge in our hands. Don't see
eye that eye? Oh? Any of that male for me? Timmy?
Speaker 5 (05:03):
Oh? Who know? Just the weekly paper and some bills
and my dancing lesson.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Dancing lesson.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Yeah, well it's it's dancing that I really wanted to
ask you about, Mazie. Oh yeah, but when you do
me the honor to accompany me to our high school
dance next Saturday night at eight thirty formal.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Oh, well, Timmy, I love to but she think of
the difference in our ages?
Speaker 5 (05:26):
Oh what difference does a year or two make? Mazie?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
A year or two? Oh, Timmy, I love you, you
do honest?
Speaker 5 (05:37):
When did you first know? I mean, am I am?
Speaker 6 (05:40):
I interrupting something? Oja?
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh Timmy, your voice suddenly got older. Oh hello, I don't.
Speaker 6 (05:46):
Think we've met Ronald Thornton a neighbor, miss? And how
do you do well?
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Likewise? Don't you know? I am lazy for beer already?
So you ain't? I mean, aren't a farmer?
Speaker 5 (05:58):
Are you amazing about the dance?
Speaker 6 (06:00):
Well?
Speaker 9 (06:00):
I came to this country principle to study American agricultural methods,
mostly animal husband.
Speaker 3 (06:05):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
I never knew animals actually had husbands. I just thought
they sort of ad lib those things.
Speaker 5 (06:12):
Mazie, I sure like to take you to that dance.
Speaker 6 (06:15):
That's a joke, I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (06:16):
No, I mean it. I'd like her to go with me.
Speaker 9 (06:18):
No, I meant about the animal husband rich in it. Oh,
I may have dropped over to find out if you've
seeing her?
Speaker 5 (06:23):
Oh no, nope, Her old lady keeps her under lock
and key maze about you two under lock and key Ronald,
they're having a three piece bandit.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
The girl I love, mister Joan Hooper. It's I've lost
cause I'm afraid.
Speaker 5 (06:35):
But why, I'm sure Mayzie likes to dance.
Speaker 6 (06:38):
I mean my chances of marrying Joan.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
Why Ronald. If the boy and girl are in love,
that's all the matters, I always say.
Speaker 5 (06:45):
That's what I always say too. This means an awful
lot to me, Mayzie.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
I know it does, and we must do something about it.
Speaker 5 (06:52):
Yeah, sure, Mazie. When it's the real thing, we must
make the most of each precious moment.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
That's right. We should bring Ronald.
Speaker 5 (07:00):
We own together, Ronald and June Paul.
Speaker 6 (07:04):
Frankly, I'm going a bit out of my mind.
Speaker 5 (07:06):
You ain't the only one. May here just a minute, fly,
Oh all right, I'll see you later.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Amazing Now, Ronald, if you don't mind my button in
what's the score between you and this Joan?
Speaker 5 (07:21):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (07:21):
Well, miss Vera, I suppose I'm too madly in love
with Joan to hav any pride left. If only I
could see her once in a while.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
Gosh, the love bug Shore has bitten a big chunk
out of you.
Speaker 9 (07:31):
Yes, but but Janes's mother simply abhors the idea of
her daughter marrying a mere farmer.
Speaker 6 (07:36):
The Hoopers are sort of the local upper crust, you see.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
Oh what's the upper crust anyway? Just a bunch of
crumbs held together by their own dough. Say what that
Jon needs a little sponge? Talked into her? What's your
phone number?
Speaker 6 (07:49):
I couldn't telephone her. Mother knows my voice, but she.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Don't know mine. And I've got an idea how to
get her out of the house. But but there's no
buts about it. You want to have children someday, don't you?
Speaker 6 (08:00):
Yes, of course, but Missus Hooper would never forgive Joan
and me if we.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Got married, and your children would never forgive if you didn't. Hello, Hello,
I would like to talk to missus J. Crosley Hooper.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
Please, this is her, I mean she?
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Who is this?
Speaker 10 (08:27):
I mean whom?
Speaker 5 (08:29):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Well, this is the Society editor of Whom's Who? I
mean Who's whom? We are inaugurating a new supplement to
our publication, Missus Hooper, entitle the most outstanding diptats of
the year, and your daughter Joan has been selected as
one of them.
Speaker 10 (08:45):
My kid, I mean my daughter, one of the most
outstanding deputies of the year.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Whoa, I mean really.
Speaker 2 (08:54):
It's really we should like to make a picture of
Joan to publish in our forthcoming edition. Would you have
her come out to the Jet Parker Farm immediately? I
mean immediately the.
Speaker 11 (09:04):
Jed Parker phone.
Speaker 10 (09:06):
But why not take the picture right here in our
one hundred and seventy eight thousand dollars home, surrounded by
the culture amongst which she was born.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Oh that's a very good question, missus Hooper. Have her
at the Parker Farm immediately, that is, unless you don't
care to have Jon's picture of parent print.
Speaker 11 (09:24):
Oh sure, sure, keep your pants, I mean, don't be impatient.
Joan will be there. All revolve my dear as friend.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
You know any when are you gonna fool me? Good
bye now, Joan?
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Joan't come downstairs at what? For just a minute? Mother?
Speaker 6 (09:42):
What's all a rocus about Gussie Crossley?
Speaker 10 (09:45):
How many times must I tell you to desist from
calling me Gussie?
Speaker 11 (09:49):
You know what? You should call me?
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Yeah, but I don't like to do it in front
of our kids.
Speaker 10 (09:54):
I mean, now that we're accepted into society, I wish
you'd refer to me as Augustine and take your feet
off the dining room table.
Speaker 6 (10:02):
Don't get all head up, Gussie. I got my shoes off.
Speaker 11 (10:05):
And I please, Crosley, don't be vulgar.
Speaker 10 (10:08):
It's our Joan. They want her picture took. Is one
of the most outstanding deputans of the season.
Speaker 9 (10:13):
Well, gee, what do you know, our little stinker in
society is making her debut.
Speaker 11 (10:19):
Not debut, egghead, it's debut debut. Yes, anyway, this will
be wonderful for Joan.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
She'll meet new men.
Speaker 8 (10:27):
Now, look, Gussie, why do you have to interfere with
the poor kid's love life?
Speaker 11 (10:31):
Pooh, marry a farmer.
Speaker 10 (10:34):
Our Jonie will be brought up amongst culture, not agriculture.
Speaker 11 (10:38):
Think of our family.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Position, family position? What family position?
Speaker 3 (10:43):
Mine?
Speaker 11 (10:44):
Crosley? Naturally, after all, I was born with a silver
spoon in my.
Speaker 6 (10:49):
Mouth and a tin tray in your hands.
Speaker 12 (11:05):
Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie Darling, it's been so long. I didn't
dream that i'd find you here at the farm.
Speaker 6 (11:11):
What it's almost revealed? Idea, she brought us together.
Speaker 2 (11:13):
Oh yeah, but the thing is to keep it together,
and there's one real yummy way marriage.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
Will you John?
Speaker 12 (11:19):
Oh Gie i'd loved her.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
But mother, what's that old crow got to do with it? Please?
Speaker 12 (11:23):
That old crow happens to be my mother. I mean, well,
despite what she's done, she still loves.
Speaker 6 (11:29):
Me, so do I, darling. Don't you want to marry me?
Speaker 5 (11:32):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I do, Ronnie.
Speaker 12 (11:33):
And the worst way, well, then.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Do it without your mother's consent. That's probably the worst way.
But well, why not you both old? Nah, aren't you?
I mean for a license.
Speaker 12 (11:42):
Well, I'm twenty eight and I'm almost eighteen. I'm seventeen
and seven eight.
Speaker 2 (11:46):
Well that ain't exactly December and May wedding, but there
is a sizeable difference in your ages.
Speaker 12 (11:52):
Oh and you think that's not good.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Well, maybe I've done too much thinking. Look you two
wait here on in the barn and talk to Timmy
Parker and get an innocent five standards opinion. Jimmy, Oh,
Timmy here, I am mazy, h Timmy. I want to
talk to you about something.
Speaker 5 (12:15):
Very serious, something serious.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Yeah, how do you feel about marriage?
Speaker 5 (12:20):
Well? I think that huh me? Marriage?
Speaker 2 (12:25):
Yeah, I feel that that's the only answer to our
problem right now, don't you?
Speaker 5 (12:30):
But miss Revera, I mean, maze, this is so sudden.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Well, I know, Timmy, it was for me too.
Speaker 5 (12:36):
I'll have to ask my pop what he thinks first. Oh,
I know he'll bring up the matter of the difference
in ages.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
But that doesn't matter when two people both want each
other so desperately, does it?
Speaker 5 (12:46):
Doesn't it? I mean, of course it doesn't. Doesn't.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Well, that's a question I want you to answer, Timmy.
Speaker 5 (12:52):
Oh, I guess when it's bigger than both of us,
who are we to fight against it? Didn't?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
He answers yet?
Speaker 5 (12:59):
I guess so? But when?
Speaker 3 (13:02):
When?
Speaker 2 (13:03):
Right away? Of course?
Speaker 5 (13:04):
Right away?
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Sure, Timmy. What do people in this town, people madly
in love who can't wait do to get married quickly
without waiting for a license?
Speaker 5 (13:13):
Oh? They drive to quickly, judge Wiggins, there, don't ask
too many questions.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Good, but I'll go to Quigley all sure the far
of it, Joan, Ronald, You and I. That'll solve the
witness problem.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
Oh oh yeah, gotta have witnesses. I can be ready
as soon as I finish my algebra homework.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
So glad that you and I both see eye to
eye on this desperate step. Oh golly, Timmy, I'm so
happy about it. I could kiss you.
Speaker 5 (13:39):
Oh, please, Maisie. Not now, Later, when it'll be legal.
Speaker 1 (13:53):
The adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern will continue in
just a moment, and now back to amaze.
Speaker 13 (14:44):
M lot of the liberary arrangements in the feet. But
be follow this, sah body, we get out with the.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Baron judgecause I hope we're not keeping you up.
Speaker 14 (14:58):
We are do all my marry and right, but sleeper days?
Could you folks come back later to Judge.
Speaker 9 (15:10):
I'm sorry, old Chap, but we just couldn't wait, right John,
Oh no, darling just couldn't know.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
And I'm in a hurry too, Judge, So put some
toothpicks on your eyelidn't start?
Speaker 6 (15:18):
Well, we can't without Timmy. When is that boy? Where
is the other witness here?
Speaker 5 (15:24):
I am mazy. I was just making a just married
sign for the back of my I mean our geloppy.
I love tradition, Mazie. Don't you there here?
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Honey? Sure? Well we're ready, judge, Judge.
Speaker 12 (15:38):
Oh dear, he's going to sleep again.
Speaker 6 (15:40):
I said, Joe Chap, two, open your eyes and let's
have that it.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
I'll wake him up with his gabble.
Speaker 6 (15:46):
Ten dollars take your places.
Speaker 5 (15:52):
Okay, do I take the bride's hand?
Speaker 6 (15:55):
Judge, Well, hardly, old boy, I'll do that.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
You Oh naturally, Timmy. Then the ceremony goes on a
honeymoon with the bride.
Speaker 5 (16:02):
He goes say that's going a little too far, don't
you think so, Joan, Well, of.
Speaker 11 (16:09):
Course not, I expected you do.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
Jimmy, didn't your father tell you about the facts of life?
Speaker 5 (16:16):
Yeah, but gosh, he must have skipped something, Mazie. Won't
it be a little embarrassing to have Ronald along on
our honey Well, of.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
Course, not, Timmy.
Speaker 12 (16:24):
You see our honeymoon, Timmy, I'm the one that's getting married.
Speaker 5 (16:30):
Oh gosh, I'm sorry, Joan, but Mazie asked me first.
Speaker 6 (16:33):
Oh I'm afraid there's been a mistake, Tonner. She's marrying me.
Speaker 5 (16:36):
Are you amazing?
Speaker 2 (16:37):
No, he means Joan, he and Joe, he and m.
Speaker 5 (16:41):
Oh oh, Shellyama, thank you.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
I'm sorry, Timmy. Timmy, you're not the groom. You're just
the best man, I mean, the best kid.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Shit, fine thing I had to put on my new
genes for nothing.
Speaker 6 (16:55):
Well, let's get home with the charge, judge.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
The judge hoop out, bit my lad, Yeah, wake.
Speaker 8 (17:01):
Up, yeah, dearly beloved, we are gathered together with the submerge.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
Hurry, young judge. I got to get back to high school,
and so does the bride.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
Timmy, the bride.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
How old are you, my dear?
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (17:20):
Oh, you have to be eighteen to get married. Not
you must have to consent to your parents.
Speaker 2 (17:25):
Oh fine, well, miss how old are you?
Speaker 3 (17:29):
You?
Speaker 8 (17:30):
Seems to be a slight difference of opinion, So I'm
just in time.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Yeah, mister Parker, it's almost over.
Speaker 4 (17:38):
Jimmy, you're not marrying that that show person.
Speaker 6 (17:42):
What I say? Oh, you've got this thing all wrong.
It's that that that that actress.
Speaker 3 (17:45):
I've had all wrong.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
She's not going to marry my.
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Son, mister Parks. Joan and Ronald that are getting married.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
Oh shall we start again?
Speaker 8 (17:56):
I'm a tired man, do you Joan?
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Hom go ahead, judge, do you?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Then they gave the concient e couldn't be married unless
it did. Joan's underage, you know, do you?
Speaker 6 (18:11):
Joe underage?
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Now look what you've done, mister Parker.
Speaker 12 (18:16):
Oh please, judge, please, I love it.
Speaker 6 (18:19):
I'm sorry, little girl, you come.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
Back when you're eight and now good night? Well dad,
you sure did it?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
Oh, my mother will never give her content.
Speaker 12 (18:29):
She wants me to marry a blue blood.
Speaker 2 (18:30):
Yeah, red clashed with her carpets.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
Oh geek, kids, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Well, mister Parker, I'm not through yet. Some way, I
don't know how I'm going to get these two kids
married if it has to be over your dead body,
and at the moment, that's a very tempting idea.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
Crowsley, Jude.
Speaker 11 (18:58):
Listen to this telegram. Oh, isn't it too too thrilling?
Speaker 10 (19:02):
It's from Ronnie's sister, Lady Millicent.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
Smite, smile.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
His sister is a lady.
Speaker 11 (19:07):
Yes, you lucky girl. And it seems that Ronnie is
really Lord Sir Baron Duke.
Speaker 5 (19:13):
Thornton, Lord Sir Baron Duke not Count, also.
Speaker 10 (19:17):
Otally boy count Sir French, and dear dear Ronnie is British.
Speaker 11 (19:22):
I never knew Rannie had assisted.
Speaker 10 (19:24):
Oh and an immensely wealthy one. The dame's loaded, I
mean quite well off. Listen to the rest of the wire.
I am passing through the colonies our route to South
Africa to visit the diamond mines.
Speaker 11 (19:37):
Mater and Peter left to me and break her. Drowsley,
didn't you learn anything at school. That's Latin for brothers.
Lady Milicent obviously has educated brain.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
But to me she sounds like a screwball.
Speaker 11 (19:53):
Jon. Dear, that is hardly the way to speak of
your future sister in law.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
Tister in law?
Speaker 11 (19:58):
Oh you mean me and Ronnie? Oh mother exactly. Now
here's the rest of the telegram.
Speaker 10 (20:04):
Suggest you arrange wedding my brother and your daughter whilst
I am there. Will arrive at four, coming direct to
your residence. Your daughter is a very lucky girl, signed
Lady Milicent.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
Smite Smite, She's lucky one.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Ronnie is the lucky one to get a girl like Joan.
Speaker 12 (20:22):
Oh who cares who's lucky as long as I'm going
to be with his Lloyd, Sir Baron Dukes Thornton. Well,
I'd better hurry and get into something nice for the wedding.
Speaker 11 (20:32):
Well, Courzy, aren't you going to get dressed for the wedding?
Speaker 6 (20:35):
Dressed?
Speaker 5 (20:36):
You?
Speaker 6 (20:36):
You mean the tie and everything?
Speaker 3 (20:38):
Yes?
Speaker 10 (20:39):
And where are your tails like you did at the
opening of the opera?
Speaker 5 (20:42):
And no brown shoes this time?
Speaker 8 (20:45):
Okay, all right.
Speaker 11 (20:47):
Oh darling.
Speaker 10 (20:48):
It'll be a beautiful ceremony and we'll have Dear, dear
Judge nodgrass performance.
Speaker 11 (20:54):
Oh, I know he'll be just delighted to meet Lady Millicent. Well, Cursey,
you haven't said a word about the lovely plans I have.
Aren't you going to say something?
Speaker 5 (21:07):
Rah?
Speaker 3 (21:08):
Rah rah, whoa, Oh it's her, I mean she Crosley.
Speaker 11 (21:26):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 12 (21:28):
How do I look?
Speaker 6 (21:29):
How could you look?
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Ronny here?
Speaker 11 (21:34):
Aren't you excited at the prospect of.
Speaker 6 (21:36):
Meeting your sister more than you know?
Speaker 2 (21:39):
I'm a little curious too, Malaby Millicent? Smile, smile, were
chry p pet bev off and all that sortthing.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
Ronnie my dad?
Speaker 9 (21:52):
Yeah, run the hello melicine dog is quite a surprise,
sing you, Yes is, isn't it?
Speaker 6 (22:00):
Jolly? Is seeing you again?
Speaker 9 (22:01):
Oh girl, I trust everything at the old castle of
ours is quite uh jolly.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
How are the moats?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
The moats, Oh they're fine. They send you their dearest regard,
you know, all sorts of greetings from your cronies. Nice
the square that's Leicester, Oh, yes, yes, Leicester sent in
regard to laid up the poor chat is at his
leg some game of spot Oh.
Speaker 11 (22:27):
Cricket, no broke it, broke it? Oh, such a delightful
sense of humor.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
So this is the lovely bride.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Oh, oh do you know I'm her mother?
Speaker 11 (22:43):
Oh and so young too?
Speaker 5 (22:46):
You do.
Speaker 11 (22:48):
This is the bride my daughter?
Speaker 3 (22:49):
Joan?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
Did you do?
Speaker 13 (22:51):
Did you do?
Speaker 6 (22:52):
I'm an old man.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
You do?
Speaker 6 (22:55):
You do yourself?
Speaker 3 (22:56):
Put it there?
Speaker 5 (22:56):
Say is there?
Speaker 2 (22:58):
But what where?
Speaker 5 (22:59):
Oh?
Speaker 11 (23:00):
You mustn't mind my husband's lady smile. You'll see he
was raised on the ranch.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Will not say? Shall we get this wedding and whatnot?
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Over with?
Speaker 3 (23:09):
What? Yes?
Speaker 6 (23:10):
Yes, I believe I heard the judges.
Speaker 15 (23:11):
Car well up a moment ago, John smog Dross and
I'm here ready to perform the ceremony.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
Hodie Crosley, Joan, that's not.
Speaker 11 (23:23):
This is Ronnie's sister from England. Lady Milicent smile a
rerue fair middle Lady Midicine, what are you doing with
Joan's veil over your face?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Were just the hard bad It's an off of the ceremony.
Now my face gets chilled and dropped.
Speaker 10 (23:39):
Well, Lady Minicon, I'll get you something else, a pillow perhaps, Oh, oh, don't.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Bother rarely the veil will do. We brace's quite used
to rushing at you now.
Speaker 6 (23:49):
Well, Joan needs that veil more than you.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
That's what you think.
Speaker 15 (23:53):
Nobody's holding up the wedding of my daughter to the
man she loves. Yeah, let's get it going. I gotta
get thee here's for another treatment. Some fresh girl hit
me plumb on my sacreliac over.
Speaker 6 (24:05):
At the Parkers this morning, I mean medicine. Let John
have the bail and let's go on with the wedding.
Our train leave shortly, yes, her honeymoon train. Yes, so
give us that veil you shouldn't have.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
If I ever see that girl again.
Speaker 3 (24:20):
I'll you.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Yes, Crassy, you shouldn't have judge not dress. You know
lady Melissa.
Speaker 5 (24:26):
I know her and believe me, she ain't no lady.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Now letting your old goat just because I happen to
be working at the Parker file.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
Speaker 11 (24:37):
I think I'm going to faint.
Speaker 2 (24:39):
She ain't royal too, but she did it for asthma.
Speaker 11 (24:42):
They're for Rannie and me.
Speaker 6 (24:43):
Yes, we love each other, missus Hooper.
Speaker 11 (24:45):
John will never marry this farmer, do you hear me?
Speaker 5 (24:48):
Never?
Speaker 3 (24:48):
Why heck she won't. That's the spirit, Pop Crossly, How
dare you talk like that?
Speaker 6 (24:54):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (24:55):
Gussie?
Speaker 6 (24:55):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (24:56):
Oh see here, miss Hooper.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
That's not that, would you lie to be a little angel?
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Well sure dead, oh.
Speaker 15 (25:04):
Crucer, you haven't spoken to me like that ever, and
I'm twenty years late.
Speaker 9 (25:12):
And we can be married, but you're done right, you can't, oh,
Joan Darling at last, Well, if.
Speaker 5 (25:18):
Missus Hooper's against it, I won't perform the ceremony.
Speaker 6 (25:20):
But we'll miss our trained No, you won't.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
We're all going back to Judge Wiggins open quickly in
a hurry, and Joan, yes, if we're ever going to
get Judge Wiggins through it, you'd better bring an alarm clock.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
In just a moment, we shall return to the Adventures
of Mazie. Now once again, here's crazy.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Well, so Joan and Ronnie were married, and I sure
hope they live happily ever after, and they will have
to remember one important thing. It isn't the saying of
id with the wedding ceremony that's important. It's the things
they do after the counts. For instance, if you have
an argument with your wife and she's right, come to
her and admit it. But if she's wrong, take her
(26:48):
to the movie. Well, I got to hit the road again.
Living out in the opening for a City Girl like me.
All that health can kill a person. She is a
long way back to Brooklyn, especially if you're traveling by thumb. Well,
got a good going feet, Mush.
Speaker 6 (27:16):
You've just heard.
Speaker 1 (27:17):
The Adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern Mazie, was written
by Arthur Phillips. Original music was composed and conducted by
Harry Zimmerman. Supporting cast included b Benadera, Ben Wright, Hans Conried, Sheldon, Leonard,
will Wright, Earl Ross, Sammy Hill, and Sidney Miller. Jack
(27:39):
McCoy speaking
Speaker 3 (28:08):
Was La
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