August 9, 2024 • 23 mins
Our host Darriel Roy interviews Mindset & Visability coach, Jon Hillstead
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome. Thank you so much for watching.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
This shows all about giving you insights and showcasing brands
that help you to live your best life and give
you confidence. As always, I want to kick out your
morning with some motivational advice to help you to feel
inspired and energized to start your day today. I want
to talk about the importance of seeing other people's success
as motivation rather than getting jealous. Most people see other
(00:23):
people's success as a threat. They see someone doing well
as validation that success is only reserved for the few
that get lucky. But the reality is if you see
someone else being successful, it's confirmation that it's possible for
you too.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
If they can do it, you can too.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
When we begin to use other people's success as motivation,
we strive to become better and become fueled by the
possibility that we too can achieve greatness. The most successful
people in the world you see today oftentimes didn't have
things handed to them. They worked hard, had a relentless
belief in themselves, and through heaps of failure, got their
big break because they.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Refuse to give up.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
The next time you feel a little jealous when you
see someone winning, instead replace that jealousy with motivation, and
remind yourself that someone else's success does not take away
from yours, as there is enough abundance in the universe
for us all to shine bright and achieve our dreams.
As Robin Sharmer quotes, unsuccessful people get jealous when they
watch the mastery of others. Successful people get inspired. Next
(01:24):
up on the show, we have Manifestation and Visibility coach
John Tilstead. John, thank you so much for being on
the show today.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
How are you doing so good?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Thank you for having me here, Thank.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
You for being here.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
As I was telling you before, I'm a big fan
of your work, so I'm really excited to talk to you.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
We have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
But before we get into all of that and you
being a manifestation coach, I want to take it back
to the beginning. I know that you mentioned that you
were broke, depressed, and working a nine to five job
that you hated. So tell us about that time in
your life and how it kind of led you to
an awakening.
Speaker 4 (01:58):
Yeah, so flashback to me in Seattle, Washington, in my
teeny tiny little studio apartment. I was really going through
my rock bottom. I think if I think all of
us experience a rock bottom, if not multiple rock.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Bottoms, absolutely, and this was my rock bottom. I was.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
I remember like working a job that I you know,
at that time, it just wasn't fulfilling. It wasn't in
alignment anymore. I knew that I wasn't happy there I was.
I would go home every day and I would like
get stoned out of my mind, smoking tons of weed,
trying to like you know, just cope with the emotions
and suppress everything that I was feeling. And it just
(02:39):
got to this place where I couldn't do it anymore.
And I really got to this dark, dark, dark space
in my mind where I was feeling really hopeless. I
was feeling like I wanted to end it all, and
it got really dark and you know, depressing. And so
I was sitting there on my bathroom floor, like really
considering waste to commit suicide. Like I was having all
(03:02):
these suicidal thoughts just because I didn't really feel like
things could change or I didn't feel that empowered state
that I could make a shift in my experience. I
always felt like I was the victim of my circumstances.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
And it was in that moment.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
There was this like almost like a divine intervention that
came in, and it was this wake up moment where
I realized that I was actually observing all of these thoughts,
I was observing all of these emotions. I was the
awareness perceiving this whole experience. And it was that moment
that I was like, wait a second, I'm not these thoughts,
(03:38):
I'm not these beliefs, I'm not this circumstance. I am
the higher being or the consciousness of observing at all.
So if I'm that consciousness observing these thoughts, then that
means that I have the ability to shift the thought.
I have the ability to change the way I feel,
I have the ability to possibly heal.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
So it was this beautiful like wake up call that.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
I had that was like, wait a second, you can change,
you can make a difference, you can shift this reality
that you're going through right now.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
So that was sort of my big aha wake up moment.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
And from that point I was just diving into all
the personal development material. I was like binge watching YouTube
videos about you know, personal development, spirituality, reading all the books, journaling,
doing all these things, going to therapy. I was just
like fully invested all in on my healing, and so
(04:33):
that was sort of the breakthrough moment for me where
it was like, I can make a shift. I can
change my life, I can change these circumstances. I am
the creator, I am at cause for everything that I'm
creating in my world, and that means that I can
create something different.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
I feel that every successful person before they became successful
had to hit rock bottom before.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
They got their breakthrough. It's something like that.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
It has to happen like because it's the way that
you kind of navigate and figure out who you are.
And I want to talk about you know, so many
people can relate to working a nine to five job that.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
They hate, feeling unfulfilled.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
So how do you help your clients navigate through those
emotions and really realize that there's so much more in
store for them.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Yeah, I think it's having that awareness first of all,
of like, I'm not happy with my life, I'm not
happy with my job. I'm because a lot of us,
I think, deny that for so long, right, we sort
of ignore those feelings, we ignore those thoughts, we ignore
that reality because it's actually scary to be honest with
ourselves and say, oh my god, like I'm not happy
with my life or I'm not happy with this job,
(05:40):
and who would I be without it?
Speaker 3 (05:41):
I don't know what's on the other side.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
There's a lot of fear there, There's a lot of
unknowns there, right, So I think that it's recognizing and
having the awareness that you're feeling this type of way
and being really honest with yourself and having a moment
with yourself and say, Okay, we're not happy here, we're
not fulfilled.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
So something needs to change.
Speaker 4 (06:02):
And then it's getting clear on Okay, well, I know
what I don't want. I know I don't want to
be in this situation. I know I don't want to
be in this job. What do I want instead? Because
often when we know what we don't want, then we
know what we do want. So it's actually getting that
clarity on what it is you'd like to experience instead.
And that's even going on a little journey for yourself
(06:22):
that's even taken some time to journal it out and
going through some different prompts. I always give my clients
different prompts to really spark those ideas and to spark
that inspiration and to help them uncover what it is
that they actually want and really under that desire, it's actually,
how do you want to feel? Yeah, because it's the
feeling we're after, Right, It's not the money, it's not
(06:45):
the job, it's not the partner. It's the way that
we're going to feel when that thing comes into our experience.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
It's the emotion we're after. So it's not really the money.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
It's the freedom you want, or the security or the
you know, the expansiveness. It's not the part and partner
you want. It's the love that you want to feel.
So it's really uncovering and getting to the bottom of
the emotion that you're after and then sort of architecting
your whole life and creating that vision for yourself is
(07:14):
the first step.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
And one thing you encourage your everyone to do is
really to show up as their authentic self and be
unapologetic about it. And you do that, and I love
that about your content is that you are unapologetically yourself.
Was there ever a time in your life where you
were kind.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
Of fearful to show people who you really were?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And how do you encourage our viewers to really show
up as who they really are not be afraid to do?
Speaker 3 (07:37):
So?
Speaker 4 (07:39):
Yes, there was definitely a time where I was terrified
and still am to this day, like there are still
new levels of you know, being my full self that
I get to show to the world, and it's.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
Terrifying, it really is.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
It's my deepest core wound is to feel safe to
be my authentic self in the world. That was my
biggest experience was, you know, not feeling safe to be me,
especially as somebody who identifies as.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
A queer man. Growing up.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
You know, I would play with the barbies and dress
up in the dresses and wear the makeup and you know,
play with my sister and all the girl toys, and
I knew that that wasn't accepted by those around me.
So I quickly turned that off, and I shut off
that part of me, and I hid that for so long.
And so it's been a beautiful journey of me sort
(08:29):
of coming out in a way and sharing who it
is that I truly am with the world and feeling
safe to do that. And I think that for a
lot of people, that's one of the most challenging things
to do, and yet it's the thing that we all
desire most. I think we all desire just to be ourselves.
We just want to be accepted in love for who
we truly are in the world right without the masks,
(08:51):
without the personas. And that's your most powerful point of
attraction too, if you want to manifest your wildest dreams
authentic self, because that's when you're the most magnetic. That's
when you're in alignment with all the things that are
meant for you in this experience because you're not trying
to be like somebody else, You're not trying to go
after somebody else's dream. You're fully integrated and aligned to
(09:15):
who you truly are. You're showing up in the world
is that fullest expression of you, and the universe is like, okay,
let's bring in all the things that are meant for you, right,
all the things that aligned for you. So I think
it's it's learning to accept yourself number one. Love yourself,
accept yourself and and like be okay with the weirdness,
(09:40):
the kooki crazy things that make you like the things
you do behind closed doors that maybe you judge yourself
for yet that's who you're, who you truly are, and
starting to starting small and starting to show up in
spaces and places as that full version. I think it
takes time. It takes you know, consistent action for sure.
And yeah, I think it's the most rewarding and liberating
(10:03):
feeling ever.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
I feel like that's something that I've learned over the
years and I'm at a point in my life now
where i just show up unapologetically myself and I notice
the people that the right people love it, right.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
The people that you know, the right people love it, and.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They love you for it, right. And it's only the
people that are not meant for you that are offended
by it, but the people that love you, love your
confidence and love that you are who you are.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Right.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
So I think that's something that you grow to be
over time. Once you start, you stop being fearful, right.
So I think that is a beautiful place to be in.
And John, you have some amazing qualifications. I know that
you're traded in NLP, you're a clinical hypnotherapist, and you're
an EFT practitioner. How do you use these techniques to
reprogram your client's minds?
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Yeah, I love modalities like.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I absolutely love exploring new tools and modalities because I
love having this tool belt that I have all these
tools and I can pull out what I need when
I need it. So the sessions are very intuitive, based
on what the client is giving me, what you know
they're moving through, and based on what they're moving through,
they'll use one of these tools from NLP, one of
these tools for hypnotherapy. Right, it just depends on the
(11:14):
client specifically, but a lot of these tools are helping
break through the conscious mind and go into the subconscious
because the subconscious mind is creating ninety five percent of
your experience. So the real change, if we want to
facilitate real change, it has to take place on that
deeper subconscious level. So it's these specific tools that I
work with that help get to that subconscious level and
(11:36):
help to reprogram those beliefs, the identities, you know, the
values at that deeper level.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
And John, you've really manifested your dream life. I see
people like Jessica Alba, Little not X, those are the
kind of people that are, you know, watching your content
as well. How has it been seeing that that you're
inspiring people from all over the world And what is
the biggest thing you've manifested so far?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I'm curious.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
Yeah, that's it's been amazing to see like celebrities liking
commenting and sharing on my posts, and you know, every
single time that happens, I'm always like, oh my god, that.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Person is like in my field right now.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
And then I remember, like, which I think is helpful
for everybody here who's listening, is they're just people, right.
And what I love about social media these days is
now everybody has a chance to shine. Regular people have
a chance to show up and share their gifts and
their art and their music and their you know, their
content and be seen by many.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
People for it.
Speaker 4 (12:38):
And so it's really a beautiful thing to see all
these incredible people in the world, like stepping into their
power and sharing their gifts and their light with the
world and yeah, being their own type of celebrity, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
So yeah, what was the what was the other question?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
What was the biggest thing you've manifested so far?
Speaker 3 (12:59):
The thing I've manifested?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Oh my gosh, I want to say, I think it's
just been my whole business trajectory. It's been my business success.
It's been like growing my audience and like doing it
all very quickly as well, Like I just started this
in twenty twenty, and things took off quite quickly and rapidly,
and I've I'm hosting in person retreats now and across
(13:23):
the world and selling them out, which is wild to me.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
It's still is wild to me.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
So I would say, like my just my business success,
and like the visibility that I've been able to cultivate
and create, and just me really showing up and saying
yes to life and allowing myself to be seen.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
On shows like this, Hi, this is me, right, this
is who I am.
Speaker 4 (13:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
I think that's been my greatest manifestation.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yeah, speaking about your business, I know that you have
some amazing retreats. I know there's one in Costa Rica.
I was telling my producer that, you know, I want
to attend one of your your retreats. Tell us about
the retreats that you offered. You know you also do
one in one coaching.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
Yeah, the retreats, they're called expansion retreats, and they take
place all over the world. We've done a couple here
in the US, We've done Costrica, Peru is coming up
in November. And I love to host these retreats at
spaces and places that I'm connected to deeply, places that
have helped support me on my journey and so it's
(14:24):
really important that I have that deep connection wherever we're.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Having the retreat. The retreats are a whole lot of fun.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
I mean, we're doing the deep work, We're doing the
belief shifting, we're releasing, we're clearing, we're visioning our big dreams,
we're regulating our nervous system. We're dancing, we're playing, we're
being in nature. It's a whole combination of things that
help people really walk away feeling completely spacious, expanded, lit
(14:52):
up about life, inspire to create and take big action
on their vision. So it's been really really fun to
create and you know, cultivate these in person containers absolutely.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And John, how do you help people get rid of
feelings of unworthiness because I feel like a lot of people,
you know, they feel like success is reserved for only
a select view.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Being lucky is reserve for a select view.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
But really it's available to all of us if we
tap into our personal power, Right, So, how do you
allow people to really, you know, know that they're worthy
themselves of everything life has to offer.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
Yeah, a lot of the work I do is getting
to the root of the decision.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
It's like, when did you decide that that you weren't
good enough. When did you decide that you.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Weren't worthy and uncovering when that was and what the
story was around that and clearing it from that root,
and then also looking to have expanders, like having expanders
in your life, people that you look up to who
maybe are doing similar things to you, people who are
where you desire to be or have what you do
(16:00):
desire to have, or people who are living that life
you desire to live. Having those expanders is so important
because they help you to realize the potential that lies
within you, because they're simply mirroring back to you your
own possibility, your own potential. There are mirrors for you
because what's possible for them is absolutely possible for you.
(16:20):
And so I love having expanders in my life, and
I think that's a great way to remind people of
what's possible.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
So it's getting to the root, uncovering the belief, uncovering.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
The decision or the experience you had that made you
decide that you weren't worthy, and then having those people
that help remind you of your infinite potential.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
And what do you think the biggest problem people have
when manifesting? I feel like you know, we see all
these videos. We all want to manifest things in our lives,
but you know, most of us have so much resistance
to manifesting like we want it and we see other
people doing it, but sometimes it doesn't work for us.
How would you kind of navigate through those emotions of
really being able to manifest the life you want?
Speaker 4 (16:59):
Yeah, I think a lot of people get stuck on
the outcome.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
They get stuck on the I want this thing, I
don't have it.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
Right, So when we're focused on the lack of it,
we're focused on the absence.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Of the desire.
Speaker 4 (17:12):
We're vibrating, we're operating in that energy of I don't have,
and so we're creating more energy of I don't have.
And So what I like to tell people is to
remember that the process is the prize.
Speaker 3 (17:25):
It's not about the end result. The end result is
just the byproduct.
Speaker 4 (17:29):
The manifestation is a byproduct of the soul expansion that
you came for. Your biggest dreams are actually there to
support your growth and evolution as a soul. So thinking
about something that you've created, some big dream that you've
already manifested, a goal that you've achieved, and looking back
and recognizing who it is that you became on the
(17:50):
way to that goal, how much you've grown, the confidence
you cultivated, the trust that you built within yourself. It's
all about that. And so to help remind people, it's
less about the end results, it's more about the process.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
The process is.
Speaker 4 (18:04):
The prize and to fall in love with that journey,
to fall in love with that process on the way
to the desire, and that helps to relieve the resistance.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
That helps to release any of the I need it now,
where is it right?
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Release them?
Speaker 4 (18:17):
Yeah, go and relax enough to allow it to come
into your experience.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
I love that you said that it's really about the journey,
because when we actually get that thing, we're like, ah,
we got it. Onto the next thing, right, We always want,
want to want, But it's really the journey of trusting
ourselves and realizing that we are co creators. Right, we
have the ability to create everything we want based on
our thoughts and how we think.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
So I think that it's really as you said, it's
the relationship with ourselves. And you know, John, I created
my platform to inspire, to uplift and really to be
a beacon of flight for anyone watching that might be
going through a hard time. So for anyone watching this
that might be depressed, feeling stuck, maybe not seeing their
goals manifest, what would you say to uplift that and
give them some words of inspiration?
Speaker 3 (19:04):
Yeah, I feel you. I feel you. Wherever you're at.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I want you to know you're exactly where you're supposed
to be, okay, even if it's in a hard place,
even if it's in a challenging time. Coming back to
the present moment, really reconnecting back to presence, because often
we're in our head about you know, what's not working
or where what's happened in the past, And when we're
in the past and when we're in the future, we're
(19:29):
disconnected from our greatest power, which is right here and now.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
So being fully present to where.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
You are, being fully accepting with where you're at, recognizing
that you have the power to shift this circumstance.
Speaker 3 (19:42):
It's in your hands.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
You're not at the effect of your situation unless you all,
unless you decide that you are.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
You are at the cause of your creation. You are
the powerful creator.
Speaker 4 (19:52):
Who has the ability to make the shift and make
the change, and to know that that that is your
innate birthright to manifest your dream life. To know that
if there's a desire that's on your heart, it means
that there's a version of you that already has it.
If there's a desire that's on your heart, it means
that it's meant for you, and it means that you
have the tools and the resources inside of you right
(20:13):
here and now to bring it to life.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Absolutely, I want to actually talk about that before I
like you, I want to talk about that about you know,
they say there's many versions of ourselves that exist at
the same time. Can you explain to us a little
bit about that, about there are there's a version of
ourselves that's broke, there's a version of ourselves that's successful,
there's a version of ourselves that you know has everything.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
We want talk to us.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
About these different versions that all exist at the same time.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
Yeah, So, Dariel, think about you and your amazing show
that you're hosting right now.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Right, this was this wasn't.
Speaker 4 (20:44):
Always your reality, no, right, at one point it was
just a thought, it was just a dream. So you
were that version at one point, envisioning this version that
you are today, right, And so there's only ever the
present moment. If we really think about it, there's no few. Sure,
there's no past. The future in the past are simply illusions.
We only are ever living right here in this present moment,
(21:07):
and a lot of people are thinking about time very linearly,
and that's how we're conditioned, that's how we're taught to
think about time. Is you know, there's a past, there's
a now, and there's a future, but all of it
is simultaneously happening right now because we're only ever living
in the now. Yeah, So all those potential versions of
you exist simultaneously in this now moment.
Speaker 3 (21:28):
And we can go into like.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Quantum physics and the quantum field and just simply put,
the quantum field is this place of infinite possibilities, and
we have the ability to like connect and tap into
that field and embody the version of us that we
desire to be in this now moment by becoming that
version now, by thinking the thoughts they would think, by
(21:51):
believing the beliefs they would believe, taking the actions they
would take, right putting ourselves in environments that that person
would put themselves in. So it's really about seeing, okay,
the version of me who has everything that they desire,
how are they thinking, how are they acting, what are
they believing? And how can I embody those qualities right
(22:11):
here now in this moment.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
It's just so we have to embody who we want
to be, and once we do that, we can align
to be that person.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
I mean, it sounds.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Really easy, right if we actually get it, you can
just align ourselves by by right.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah. And John, for all of.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Our viewers that want to get coached by you or
join one if you're retreats, where can they do so?
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Yeah, you can find me on social media at John Hillstead.
You can reach out to me via email or go
to my website John Hillstead dot com and would love
to see you at one of the retreats or in
one of my programs.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
John, thank you so much for being on the show today. Honestly,
keep up the amazing work. I'm such a big fan
of yours. I've been watching your videos. I love your
little rants that you do about you know about like
you just hype people up and you're really doing amazing
work in this world. Congratulations on all your success and
I can't wait to see what else is in the
store for you.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Thank you so much. And same to you.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
Congratulations on your beautiful show that you're hosting. It's been
an honor to be here, and thank you for having
me on
Hello and welcome. Thank you so much for watching.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
This shows all about giving you insights and showcasing brands
that help you to live your best life and give
you confidence. As always, I want to kick out your
morning with some motivational advice to help you to feel
inspired and energized to start your day today. I want
to talk about the importance of seeing other people's success
as motivation rather than getting jealous. Most people see other
(00:23):
people's success as a threat. They see someone doing well
as validation that success is only reserved for the few
that get lucky. But the reality is if you see
someone else being successful, it's confirmation that it's possible for
you too.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
If they can do it, you can too.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
When we begin to use other people's success as motivation,
we strive to become better and become fueled by the
possibility that we too can achieve greatness. The most successful
people in the world you see today oftentimes didn't have
things handed to them. They worked hard, had a relentless
belief in themselves, and through heaps of failure, got their
big break because they.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Refuse to give up.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
The next time you feel a little jealous when you
see someone winning, instead replace that jealousy with motivation, and
remind yourself that someone else's success does not take away
from yours, as there is enough abundance in the universe
for us all to shine bright and achieve our dreams.
As Robin Sharmer quotes, unsuccessful people get jealous when they
watch the mastery of others. Successful people get inspired. Next
(01:24):
up on the show, we have Manifestation and Visibility coach
John Tilstead. John, thank you so much for being on
the show today.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
How are you doing so good?
Speaker 3 (01:32):
Thank you for having me here, Thank.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
You for being here.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
As I was telling you before, I'm a big fan
of your work, so I'm really excited to talk to you.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
We have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
But before we get into all of that and you
being a manifestation coach, I want to take it back
to the beginning. I know that you mentioned that you
were broke, depressed, and working a nine to five job
that you hated. So tell us about that time in
your life and how it kind of led you to
an awakening.
Speaker 4 (01:58):
Yeah, so flashback to me in Seattle, Washington, in my
teeny tiny little studio apartment. I was really going through
my rock bottom. I think if I think all of
us experience a rock bottom, if not multiple rock.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Bottoms, absolutely, and this was my rock bottom. I was.
Speaker 4 (02:16):
I remember like working a job that I you know,
at that time, it just wasn't fulfilling. It wasn't in
alignment anymore. I knew that I wasn't happy there I was.
I would go home every day and I would like
get stoned out of my mind, smoking tons of weed,
trying to like you know, just cope with the emotions
and suppress everything that I was feeling. And it just
(02:39):
got to this place where I couldn't do it anymore.
And I really got to this dark, dark, dark space
in my mind where I was feeling really hopeless. I
was feeling like I wanted to end it all, and
it got really dark and you know, depressing. And so
I was sitting there on my bathroom floor, like really
considering waste to commit suicide. Like I was having all
(03:02):
these suicidal thoughts just because I didn't really feel like
things could change or I didn't feel that empowered state
that I could make a shift in my experience. I
always felt like I was the victim of my circumstances.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
And it was in that moment.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
There was this like almost like a divine intervention that
came in, and it was this wake up moment where
I realized that I was actually observing all of these thoughts,
I was observing all of these emotions. I was the
awareness perceiving this whole experience. And it was that moment
that I was like, wait a second, I'm not these thoughts,
(03:38):
I'm not these beliefs, I'm not this circumstance. I am
the higher being or the consciousness of observing at all.
So if I'm that consciousness observing these thoughts, then that
means that I have the ability to shift the thought.
I have the ability to change the way I feel,
I have the ability to possibly heal.
Speaker 3 (03:59):
So it was this beautiful like wake up call that.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
I had that was like, wait a second, you can change,
you can make a difference, you can shift this reality
that you're going through right now.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
So that was sort of my big aha wake up moment.
Speaker 4 (04:13):
And from that point I was just diving into all
the personal development material. I was like binge watching YouTube
videos about you know, personal development, spirituality, reading all the books, journaling,
doing all these things, going to therapy. I was just
like fully invested all in on my healing, and so
(04:33):
that was sort of the breakthrough moment for me where
it was like, I can make a shift. I can
change my life, I can change these circumstances. I am
the creator, I am at cause for everything that I'm
creating in my world, and that means that I can
create something different.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (04:51):
I feel that every successful person before they became successful
had to hit rock bottom before.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
They got their breakthrough. It's something like that.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
It has to happen like because it's the way that
you kind of navigate and figure out who you are.
And I want to talk about you know, so many
people can relate to working a nine to five job that.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
They hate, feeling unfulfilled.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
So how do you help your clients navigate through those
emotions and really realize that there's so much more in
store for them.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
Yeah, I think it's having that awareness first of all,
of like, I'm not happy with my life, I'm not
happy with my job. I'm because a lot of us,
I think, deny that for so long, right, we sort
of ignore those feelings, we ignore those thoughts, we ignore
that reality because it's actually scary to be honest with
ourselves and say, oh my god, like I'm not happy
with my life or I'm not happy with this job,
(05:40):
and who would I be without it?
Speaker 3 (05:41):
I don't know what's on the other side.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
There's a lot of fear there, There's a lot of
unknowns there, right, So I think that it's recognizing and
having the awareness that you're feeling this type of way
and being really honest with yourself and having a moment
with yourself and say, Okay, we're not happy here, we're
not fulfilled.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
So something needs to change.
Speaker 4 (06:02):
And then it's getting clear on Okay, well, I know
what I don't want. I know I don't want to
be in this situation. I know I don't want to
be in this job. What do I want instead? Because
often when we know what we don't want, then we
know what we do want. So it's actually getting that
clarity on what it is you'd like to experience instead.
And that's even going on a little journey for yourself
(06:22):
that's even taken some time to journal it out and
going through some different prompts. I always give my clients
different prompts to really spark those ideas and to spark
that inspiration and to help them uncover what it is
that they actually want and really under that desire, it's actually,
how do you want to feel? Yeah, because it's the
feeling we're after, Right, It's not the money, it's not
(06:45):
the job, it's not the partner. It's the way that
we're going to feel when that thing comes into our experience.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
It's the emotion we're after. So it's not really the money.
Speaker 4 (06:53):
It's the freedom you want, or the security or the
you know, the expansiveness. It's not the part and partner
you want. It's the love that you want to feel.
So it's really uncovering and getting to the bottom of
the emotion that you're after and then sort of architecting
your whole life and creating that vision for yourself is
(07:14):
the first step.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
And one thing you encourage your everyone to do is
really to show up as their authentic self and be
unapologetic about it. And you do that, and I love
that about your content is that you are unapologetically yourself.
Was there ever a time in your life where you
were kind.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
Of fearful to show people who you really were?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And how do you encourage our viewers to really show
up as who they really are not be afraid to do?
Speaker 3 (07:37):
So?
Speaker 4 (07:39):
Yes, there was definitely a time where I was terrified
and still am to this day, like there are still
new levels of you know, being my full self that
I get to show to the world, and it's.
Speaker 3 (07:53):
Terrifying, it really is.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
It's my deepest core wound is to feel safe to
be my authentic self in the world. That was my
biggest experience was, you know, not feeling safe to be me,
especially as somebody who identifies as.
Speaker 3 (08:06):
A queer man. Growing up.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
You know, I would play with the barbies and dress
up in the dresses and wear the makeup and you know,
play with my sister and all the girl toys, and
I knew that that wasn't accepted by those around me.
So I quickly turned that off, and I shut off
that part of me, and I hid that for so long.
And so it's been a beautiful journey of me sort
(08:29):
of coming out in a way and sharing who it
is that I truly am with the world and feeling
safe to do that. And I think that for a
lot of people, that's one of the most challenging things
to do, and yet it's the thing that we all
desire most. I think we all desire just to be ourselves.
We just want to be accepted in love for who
we truly are in the world right without the masks,
(08:51):
without the personas. And that's your most powerful point of
attraction too, if you want to manifest your wildest dreams
authentic self, because that's when you're the most magnetic. That's
when you're in alignment with all the things that are
meant for you in this experience because you're not trying
to be like somebody else, You're not trying to go
after somebody else's dream. You're fully integrated and aligned to
(09:15):
who you truly are. You're showing up in the world
is that fullest expression of you, and the universe is like, okay,
let's bring in all the things that are meant for you, right,
all the things that aligned for you. So I think
it's it's learning to accept yourself number one. Love yourself,
accept yourself and and like be okay with the weirdness,
(09:40):
the kooki crazy things that make you like the things
you do behind closed doors that maybe you judge yourself
for yet that's who you're, who you truly are, and
starting to starting small and starting to show up in
spaces and places as that full version. I think it
takes time. It takes you know, consistent action for sure.
And yeah, I think it's the most rewarding and liberating
(10:03):
feeling ever.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
I feel like that's something that I've learned over the
years and I'm at a point in my life now
where i just show up unapologetically myself and I notice
the people that the right people love it, right.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
The people that you know, the right people love it, and.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
They love you for it, right. And it's only the
people that are not meant for you that are offended
by it, but the people that love you, love your
confidence and love that you are who you are.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Right.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
So I think that's something that you grow to be
over time. Once you start, you stop being fearful, right.
So I think that is a beautiful place to be in.
And John, you have some amazing qualifications. I know that
you're traded in NLP, you're a clinical hypnotherapist, and you're
an EFT practitioner. How do you use these techniques to
reprogram your client's minds?
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Yeah, I love modalities like.
Speaker 4 (10:51):
I absolutely love exploring new tools and modalities because I
love having this tool belt that I have all these
tools and I can pull out what I need when
I need it. So the sessions are very intuitive, based
on what the client is giving me, what you know
they're moving through, and based on what they're moving through,
they'll use one of these tools from NLP, one of
these tools for hypnotherapy. Right, it just depends on the
(11:14):
client specifically, but a lot of these tools are helping
break through the conscious mind and go into the subconscious
because the subconscious mind is creating ninety five percent of
your experience. So the real change, if we want to
facilitate real change, it has to take place on that
deeper subconscious level. So it's these specific tools that I
work with that help get to that subconscious level and
(11:36):
help to reprogram those beliefs, the identities, you know, the
values at that deeper level.
Speaker 2 (11:44):
And John, you've really manifested your dream life. I see
people like Jessica Alba, Little not X, those are the
kind of people that are, you know, watching your content
as well. How has it been seeing that that you're
inspiring people from all over the world And what is
the biggest thing you've manifested so far?
Speaker 1 (12:00):
I'm curious.
Speaker 4 (12:02):
Yeah, that's it's been amazing to see like celebrities liking
commenting and sharing on my posts, and you know, every
single time that happens, I'm always like, oh my god, that.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Person is like in my field right now.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
And then I remember, like, which I think is helpful
for everybody here who's listening, is they're just people, right.
And what I love about social media these days is
now everybody has a chance to shine. Regular people have
a chance to show up and share their gifts and
their art and their music and their you know, their
content and be seen by many.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
People for it.
Speaker 4 (12:38):
And so it's really a beautiful thing to see all
these incredible people in the world, like stepping into their
power and sharing their gifts and their light with the
world and yeah, being their own type of celebrity, you know.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
So yeah, what was the what was the other question?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
What was the biggest thing you've manifested so far?
Speaker 3 (12:59):
The thing I've manifested?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Oh my gosh, I want to say, I think it's
just been my whole business trajectory. It's been my business success.
It's been like growing my audience and like doing it
all very quickly as well, Like I just started this
in twenty twenty, and things took off quite quickly and rapidly,
and I've I'm hosting in person retreats now and across
(13:23):
the world and selling them out, which is wild to me.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
It's still is wild to me.
Speaker 4 (13:29):
So I would say, like my just my business success,
and like the visibility that I've been able to cultivate
and create, and just me really showing up and saying
yes to life and allowing myself to be seen.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
On shows like this, Hi, this is me, right, this
is who I am.
Speaker 4 (13:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
I think that's been my greatest manifestation.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yeah, speaking about your business, I know that you have
some amazing retreats. I know there's one in Costa Rica.
I was telling my producer that, you know, I want
to attend one of your your retreats. Tell us about
the retreats that you offered. You know you also do
one in one coaching.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
Yeah, the retreats, they're called expansion retreats, and they take
place all over the world. We've done a couple here
in the US, We've done Costrica, Peru is coming up
in November. And I love to host these retreats at
spaces and places that I'm connected to deeply, places that
have helped support me on my journey and so it's
(14:24):
really important that I have that deep connection wherever we're.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Having the retreat. The retreats are a whole lot of fun.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
I mean, we're doing the deep work, We're doing the
belief shifting, we're releasing, we're clearing, we're visioning our big dreams,
we're regulating our nervous system. We're dancing, we're playing, we're
being in nature. It's a whole combination of things that
help people really walk away feeling completely spacious, expanded, lit
(14:52):
up about life, inspire to create and take big action
on their vision. So it's been really really fun to
create and you know, cultivate these in person containers absolutely.
Speaker 2 (15:07):
And John, how do you help people get rid of
feelings of unworthiness because I feel like a lot of people,
you know, they feel like success is reserved for only
a select view.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
Being lucky is reserve for a select view.
Speaker 2 (15:20):
But really it's available to all of us if we
tap into our personal power, Right, So, how do you
allow people to really, you know, know that they're worthy
themselves of everything life has to offer.
Speaker 4 (15:32):
Yeah, a lot of the work I do is getting
to the root of the decision.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
It's like, when did you decide that that you weren't
good enough. When did you decide that you.
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Weren't worthy and uncovering when that was and what the
story was around that and clearing it from that root,
and then also looking to have expanders, like having expanders
in your life, people that you look up to who
maybe are doing similar things to you, people who are
where you desire to be or have what you do
(16:00):
desire to have, or people who are living that life
you desire to live. Having those expanders is so important
because they help you to realize the potential that lies
within you, because they're simply mirroring back to you your
own possibility, your own potential. There are mirrors for you
because what's possible for them is absolutely possible for you.
(16:20):
And so I love having expanders in my life, and
I think that's a great way to remind people of
what's possible.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
So it's getting to the root, uncovering the belief, uncovering.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
The decision or the experience you had that made you
decide that you weren't worthy, and then having those people
that help remind you of your infinite potential.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
And what do you think the biggest problem people have
when manifesting? I feel like you know, we see all
these videos. We all want to manifest things in our lives,
but you know, most of us have so much resistance
to manifesting like we want it and we see other
people doing it, but sometimes it doesn't work for us.
How would you kind of navigate through those emotions of
really being able to manifest the life you want?
Speaker 4 (16:59):
Yeah, I think a lot of people get stuck on
the outcome.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
They get stuck on the I want this thing, I
don't have it.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
Right, So when we're focused on the lack of it,
we're focused on the absence.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Of the desire.
Speaker 4 (17:12):
We're vibrating, we're operating in that energy of I don't have,
and so we're creating more energy of I don't have.
And So what I like to tell people is to
remember that the process is the prize.
Speaker 3 (17:25):
It's not about the end result. The end result is
just the byproduct.
Speaker 4 (17:29):
The manifestation is a byproduct of the soul expansion that
you came for. Your biggest dreams are actually there to
support your growth and evolution as a soul. So thinking
about something that you've created, some big dream that you've
already manifested, a goal that you've achieved, and looking back
and recognizing who it is that you became on the
(17:50):
way to that goal, how much you've grown, the confidence
you cultivated, the trust that you built within yourself. It's
all about that. And so to help remind people, it's
less about the end results, it's more about the process.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
The process is.
Speaker 4 (18:04):
The prize and to fall in love with that journey,
to fall in love with that process on the way
to the desire, and that helps to relieve the resistance.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
That helps to release any of the I need it now,
where is it right?
Speaker 1 (18:16):
Release them?
Speaker 4 (18:17):
Yeah, go and relax enough to allow it to come
into your experience.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
I love that you said that it's really about the journey,
because when we actually get that thing, we're like, ah,
we got it. Onto the next thing, right, We always want,
want to want, But it's really the journey of trusting
ourselves and realizing that we are co creators. Right, we
have the ability to create everything we want based on
our thoughts and how we think.
Speaker 1 (18:42):
Right.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
So I think that it's really as you said, it's
the relationship with ourselves. And you know, John, I created
my platform to inspire, to uplift and really to be
a beacon of flight for anyone watching that might be
going through a hard time. So for anyone watching this
that might be depressed, feeling stuck, maybe not seeing their
goals manifest, what would you say to uplift that and
give them some words of inspiration?
Speaker 3 (19:04):
Yeah, I feel you. I feel you. Wherever you're at.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I want you to know you're exactly where you're supposed
to be, okay, even if it's in a hard place,
even if it's in a challenging time. Coming back to
the present moment, really reconnecting back to presence, because often
we're in our head about you know, what's not working
or where what's happened in the past, And when we're
in the past and when we're in the future, we're
(19:29):
disconnected from our greatest power, which is right here and now.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
So being fully present to where.
Speaker 4 (19:34):
You are, being fully accepting with where you're at, recognizing
that you have the power to shift this circumstance.
Speaker 3 (19:42):
It's in your hands.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
You're not at the effect of your situation unless you all,
unless you decide that you are.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
You are at the cause of your creation. You are
the powerful creator.
Speaker 4 (19:52):
Who has the ability to make the shift and make
the change, and to know that that that is your
innate birthright to manifest your dream life. To know that
if there's a desire that's on your heart, it means
that there's a version of you that already has it.
If there's a desire that's on your heart, it means
that it's meant for you, and it means that you
have the tools and the resources inside of you right
(20:13):
here and now to bring it to life.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Absolutely, I want to actually talk about that before I
like you, I want to talk about that about you know,
they say there's many versions of ourselves that exist at
the same time. Can you explain to us a little
bit about that, about there are there's a version of
ourselves that's broke, there's a version of ourselves that's successful,
there's a version of ourselves that you know has everything.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
We want talk to us.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
About these different versions that all exist at the same time.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
Yeah, So, Dariel, think about you and your amazing show
that you're hosting right now.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Right, this was this wasn't.
Speaker 4 (20:44):
Always your reality, no, right, at one point it was
just a thought, it was just a dream. So you
were that version at one point, envisioning this version that
you are today, right, And so there's only ever the
present moment. If we really think about it, there's no few. Sure,
there's no past. The future in the past are simply illusions.
We only are ever living right here in this present moment,
(21:07):
and a lot of people are thinking about time very linearly,
and that's how we're conditioned, that's how we're taught to
think about time. Is you know, there's a past, there's
a now, and there's a future, but all of it
is simultaneously happening right now because we're only ever living
in the now. Yeah, So all those potential versions of
you exist simultaneously in this now moment.
Speaker 3 (21:28):
And we can go into like.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Quantum physics and the quantum field and just simply put,
the quantum field is this place of infinite possibilities, and
we have the ability to like connect and tap into
that field and embody the version of us that we
desire to be in this now moment by becoming that
version now, by thinking the thoughts they would think, by
(21:51):
believing the beliefs they would believe, taking the actions they
would take, right putting ourselves in environments that that person
would put themselves in. So it's really about seeing, okay,
the version of me who has everything that they desire,
how are they thinking, how are they acting, what are
they believing? And how can I embody those qualities right
(22:11):
here now in this moment.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
It's just so we have to embody who we want
to be, and once we do that, we can align
to be that person.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
I mean, it sounds.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Really easy, right if we actually get it, you can
just align ourselves by by right.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Yeah. And John, for all of.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Our viewers that want to get coached by you or
join one if you're retreats, where can they do so?
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Yeah, you can find me on social media at John Hillstead.
You can reach out to me via email or go
to my website John Hillstead dot com and would love
to see you at one of the retreats or in
one of my programs.
Speaker 2 (22:46):
John, thank you so much for being on the show today. Honestly,
keep up the amazing work. I'm such a big fan
of yours. I've been watching your videos. I love your
little rants that you do about you know about like
you just hype people up and you're really doing amazing
work in this world. Congratulations on all your success and
I can't wait to see what else is in the
store for you.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Thank you so much. And same to you.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
Congratulations on your beautiful show that you're hosting. It's been
an honor to be here, and thank you for having
me on
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