September 2, 2025 • 14 mins
If you have negative parents, you will have negative kids—because children don’t just hear what you say, they model what you do. Your energy becomes their blueprint.
I have two powerful examples:
👉 Mike and his wife—constantly negative, always complaining. Their teens reflected the same energy, walking through life with the same attitude.
👉 Ralph and his wife—radiating kindness, positivity, and strength. Their teens grew up mirroring those values, living with joy and respect.
The speed of the leader truly is the speed of the pack. If you want your kids to rise higher, you must first lead by example that they can follow.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-doctor-s-corner-with-dr-john-oda--5470834/support.
Dr. John Oda has spent 38 years helping teens and parents strengthen communication, overcome struggles, and build thriving families. Download a free 23-minute deep dive from his book *Connecting with Your Teen: Send an email to info@drjohnoda.com for your download.
Articles, Books, and Podcasts
https://drjohnoda.com/pr-media
Bonding the Family Together
:https://family.pnbcgroup.com/
If your teen is playing sports and wants that extra edge
https://sports.pnbcgroup.com
I have two powerful examples:
👉 Mike and his wife—constantly negative, always complaining. Their teens reflected the same energy, walking through life with the same attitude.
👉 Ralph and his wife—radiating kindness, positivity, and strength. Their teens grew up mirroring those values, living with joy and respect.
The speed of the leader truly is the speed of the pack. If you want your kids to rise higher, you must first lead by example that they can follow.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-doctor-s-corner-with-dr-john-oda--5470834/support.
Dr. John Oda has spent 38 years helping teens and parents strengthen communication, overcome struggles, and build thriving families. Download a free 23-minute deep dive from his book *Connecting with Your Teen: Send an email to info@drjohnoda.com for your download.
Articles, Books, and Podcasts
https://drjohnoda.com/pr-media
Bonding the Family Together
:https://family.pnbcgroup.com/
If your teen is playing sports and wants that extra edge
https://sports.pnbcgroup.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Doctor's Corner with doctor John Odo. Guys,
thank you so much for being here today. I'm pretty
much excited a little bit back around about myself. So
you guys know who I am. I am the author
of Connecting with Your Team. That is an Amazon and
national bestselling author of three books We Go To book
on Life, Regarden and a World of book on business
(00:22):
as well.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
So I have two.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Podcasts, one for parents and one for business. So thank
you so much for joining me for UH parents, if
it's day, night, or evening, whatever it is, thank you
so much for joining me today. Today is gonna be
an exciting show. But let me tell you a little
bit about myself. I have thirty eight years in the
mental health field or slash neuroscience UH have worked with
over a hundred thousand kids with the ninety percent success right.
(00:45):
How I figured out success right is if they're going
to college and if they're moving forward. And most of
my kids I worked with was more of as a
combination of both. It was at risk kids, meaning that
the kids was from the foster care, from.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
UH, the juvie, or from the court. And I also
worked with some affluent families as well. So I worked
with the combination of both.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
And then all of my kids that I do have,
they're either doctors or lary. You're as commercial pilots say
everything else because I teach them something completely different and
teach them strategies and everything differently so they can go
further faster. So that being said, guys, I got a
core show for you. So most of my insights I
get this from the gym. You know, So I lived
(01:25):
in everybody in California. Most of my clients, most of
a lot of the parents that I work with is
you know, some of the parents who work with is.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
From the gym. Right.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
So the name of the program I called is the
speed of the Leader. Is the speed of the pack
is really for parents today, right, And I'm gonna I'm
gonna describe two different parents, same education, you know, saying
a financial whole nine yards, but two different behaviors. The
speed of leaders, the speed of the package for me
(01:57):
is that. So the first example, let's call Mike. Mike's
a good kid. You know, Mike's a good guy. Uh,
he's married you know for fifteen years, he hath two kids.
But Mike is negative. Mike is the most negative guy
in the world. He tells his kids that they can't
do much, that you should do this, they should do that.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
They're playing sports. They want them to. He want them
to make great grades. And Mike's just a mess.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
So I asked michae one that said, I have a
question for you. You want your kids to be straight
A students and play sports, and they're pretty good in sports.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
In high school. Where you a straight A student?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
He says, no, I was terrible, But if you're terrible,
But this kid is just negative. Mike is the most
And I know the guy is from the gym. He's
just a negative guy. Everything about his negative. He owns
his own business, but everything's bad.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
This is doing well.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
He paid for it, you know, he paid for a
couple of homes already. But he's just a negative guy.
So when I explained to him at the gym, I says,
the speed of the leader, at the speed.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Of the pack.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
So I met his kids, and oh my god, his
kids is just a carbon con be negative. Didn't think
they could do this. They so doubted themselves. They overthought stuff,
and and and and when I looked at them, they
look like a mini They look like a mini mic right.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
I mean, then that's just pretty much was there. It
was behavior. You know, Mi's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I talk to him all the time, but his attitude
and his vibration is very negative. You know, and you know,
and you know, he's a nice guy. We talk everything
else and then he goes to negative do him and gloom.
Everything's bad, everything's ticket, X, Y and Z. And when
I saw his kids, his kids behaved the exact same way. No,
(03:41):
let's take another guy, Ralph. Ralph, Oh my god, is
fun man. Ralph have energy, got fashion, he got excitement.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
Man. Every day I see him, he smiled at me.
He's positive, soll I mean, just just positive. So you
know his kids, oh my god.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
His kids was the exact same way, positive, pumped up, excited,
one of them wanting to be a damn doctor and
one of them wanting to be a lawyer. And and
their grades are you know, the grades are the grades
are decent, you know, no bees, you know, three point two.
But they're playing sports and they're doing extremely well in
sports and they're probably getting starship.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Right.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
So we have two kids from the same area, same education,
same family, men and my wives, same everything. The difference
is the attitudes, and the reason why I'm making this
such a huge point is what parents have to know, right,
the speedy leader, the speed of the pack, or in
common layman terms, monkey see monkey do. As a child,
(04:43):
we're gonna see, we're gonna do what we do and
see what we do from our parents. When they do it,
they give you a great example. Most guys know this,
and most and you might not know this. I come
from a family of ten, made of ten. I normally
mentioned that I was a baby boy too recently, but
you know, when you get past a certain age, yay,
I'm a baby boy now. So coming back from a
family of ten. My mom and my dad was like
(05:05):
poetry motion. Mom and dad was direct. I mean there
was no fluff, no anything else but my God, me
ta you man, my dad, Jesus marriage. It was the
most positive guy in the world, positive even see people.
How you doing today, baby, how you doing today? Sugar
and direct. As a point, Mom was on the other side,
(05:26):
you know, direct. People loved her as well, but she
was more of the education and bougie type, right. But
it was two blends. And when I was growing up,
I said I'd never be like mom and Dad. Never
never never never, Man, I lied, I lied.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
I lied. I'm just like that.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
I'm just like mom. I'm to the point, I'm direct,
I'm loud.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
People like me. I don't care if they love me.
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
I'm just gonna be me right, And sometimes that get
on people nerves. But hey, you know, I tell myself,
if you're a parent, you need to work on yourself
because if you're working yourself, you can work in the kid.
If you can't work in yourself, you can't work in
your kid, and you are not doing what you need
to start to get doing right. So my biggest thing
about it is that listen to me, and my whole concept.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Is I act like Mom and Dad. I really do.
I never thought i'd say it, but I act like
Mom and Dad. You know, I go to mom.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
She was a preacher kid, so you know, I go
to church and most of my teachings are more.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Biblical or have a spiritual principle to it.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Right, Dad, you worked two jobs, you know, sixteen hours
a day, you know, for forty years, you know, and then
he did a side a job and then he had
a garden, you know. And I work like that. I
work sixteen hours a day. People say you work so much,
you should have fun. I'm good, I'm doing what I love.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
This is fun.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
This is fun to me right, and I get bits
and pieces of my parents right. The reason why I'm
saying this is, listen to me, parents out there. If
you're negative, if you have doubt and fear and stress,
work on those issues because your kids are watching you.
(07:09):
How you handle stuff, how you deal with stuff. They're
watching you. So if they're watching you, why don't you
put on a great show. The grad show is being consistent.
The grad show is to listen to me. Hey, I'm
not perfect, because we're never perfect, and I don't want
to be perfect, to be truly honest with you, but
I can work on some of the stuff that I
need to work on and get better. Why because, as
(07:31):
I said, your kids are watching you. They might not
say anything, but they're watching you. Because I don't want
you to be like Mike. Mike's a great guy. I
love Mike to death, but Mike's a butt hit. His
kids are butt heads. His kids out themselves. They don't
want to do anything, and that's what they model. I
(07:52):
want you to be more like Ralph Man Ralph works
on himself. Ralph goes the person to the love and
to go to summers, go to watch sheet books.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
He told his kids to do the exact same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
So I wanted to work with Mike and his kids.
Mike too wanted to work with me, but Ralph did.
Ralph kids are doing extremely well, Mike today, They're fine,
They're okay. You know, I had to figure it out
and so a soaking they and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Why you need to figure it out?
Speaker 1 (08:19):
So the question that I have is for you guys
the parents are there, right, Are you more like a Mike.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Negative he doesn't really they don't really work on themselves.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Or are you like a Ralph positive, have an attitude
of gratitude, teach your kids stuff or the similar as
to workshops, because here goes no, even if you're a
mic right now or the Mike meaning the family of
a Mic right because even Mike's wife, you know, Mike
wife is interesting as well. You know, she's a little
(08:55):
bit on the negative side, Ralph wife. Mike god man,
she's positive, she's bumped up, she's excited, she gets a
gym man, she speaks to me all the time.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
She's just so freaking nice. I met ralph kids. Oh
my god. So one of this kids plays sports, and
I kept on pushing her.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
I said, you know, you need to work out a
little bit her and she said, I have practice. I said,
I said, you want to let her man jacket and
all this stuff. It says, you know, if you do
some extra, I could bet your parents for do it.
And she said, how do you know? I said it
because I'm just old as your parents. And she started
to alive. She says, okay, So she started doing it,
and you know, I talked to Ralph, you know, wife,
and everybody else's house ends going. Man, John, I don't
(09:31):
know what you did, did John? But she she's working
out and she got stuff that she wanted to get
us to the course. It's a win win, right. So
my kids needed it bad. But Mike was not inside that.
Mike thought said he that he handled it. He dealt
with it, so anybody else can. So here's a question
(09:53):
that I have is for you the parents out there.
If you are a Mike, what can you do to
be a Ralph? Because what you gotta understand this and
and and and i'm'a turning this up from so I
wrote a book called Life's of Guard did and presents
unwomen to business growth.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
And in my book, I took uh the the the
the guy Allen private from my teenager book and put
him the business book. Here his quot thinking about it as
a teenager, the kid had some issues. He didn't deal
with that, right, and and and and at fifteen or sixteen,
seventeen and eighteen, he had issues. Now there's fifty years old,
here's a billionaire. But he's still a jerk, right, and
(10:33):
he still having problems. So here's a question that I have.
It's for you. If you are gonna be a mic
and if you see that you have some gaps to.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Close, close 'em, get coaching and get helped to read books,
to whatever takes.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Because remember this, parents, the speed of the leader is
the speed of the pack.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
What your kids see you do, they're going to do. Yes,
they're gonna do that. You might think it's like they're
not watching you everything else doing. They're watching you. They're
watching you. So it goes.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
If you like to section right here, and if you
have some comments that you want me to speak on
some type of topic or anything else.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
After thirty eight years in this field.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I've worked with every population you can actually imagine work
with parents with continus. But this to me, speed, the
leaders speed in the pack is huge because I'm telling you, you
couldn't tell me forty years ago that I'd be just
like just like mom and dad and my god and
after if tell you, man, when I was a teenager,
I didn't like them. I thought they're mean as hell.
I didn't start liking it until about in the mid
twenties thirties. I'm like, you know, they're really good people.
(11:41):
I just didn't. I didn't get this.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Right.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
And there's another thing about I have to mention this,
and it's gonna be another show, or I think I
did the show about this.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
The outcome is not to be your kids friend. The
outcomes is to be your is be parents to them.
That's it, no more, no loss but parents. Right. You
can be friendly to them, but you still got to
get a consequence. We'll go into that.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
I think I did that last year, but I do
it again because that's really a huge one. You know,
there's a lot of therapists, a lot of psychiatrists and psychotists,
so I'm you should be friends with your kids, and
I'm like, I don't want that model or that concept
because I know I like for my damn friends.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
I mean, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Sure about you, but that's what I do, and we
should have boundaries with their kids see Richard certain age.
And then of course you know they will see how
hard that you work and they can understand it. So
I challenge you, guys right now, I want you to
think about it. Am I a Mike Mike wife the
negative type? Or if I'm Ralph and if I'm in between,
(12:45):
how can I get more positive?
Speaker 2 (12:46):
What eras? Can I work in myself in to go
further faster? So it goes to you guys.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
If you like to show or any shows on behalf,
please give me five stars. If you are a business owner,
we do have a show as well called the Doctor
Johnalder Method, and I teach neurosciences, meet business Mastery. I
work with guys like the great Tony Robbinson, Chet Holmes
and Jay Abraham and all the rest of the guys,
and then I do neurosciences, meaning that a lot of
(13:15):
the times when I when I meet like clients or.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
People and they go to rector therapists for years or two.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
It takes me a couple sessions and a couple couple
weeks to a month'sash. You get the more they need
to be at and and and then then maybe a
couple of months where they can be fine. So just
do a different UH system strategies. I think everybody doing
a great job. I just I just want people to
to go further and faster and not stick around. I
seeing this, one guy said he had been a counselor
for ten years having the same issue, you know, And
(13:41):
I just shook my head and said, I'm sorry for that,
cause I don't think that shouldn't be worked. But that's
a different story. So anyway, guys, thank you guys so much.
Thank you for UH of spending some time with me today.
And remember the speed the leader, the speed of the pack.
Which one are you, Mike and his family or Ralph
and his family? Guys, Until the next time, taking always
(14:01):
got bluss.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Bye for now,
Welcome to the Doctor's Corner with doctor John Odo. Guys,
thank you so much for being here today. I'm pretty
much excited a little bit back around about myself. So
you guys know who I am. I am the author
of Connecting with Your Team. That is an Amazon and
national bestselling author of three books We Go To book
on Life, Regarden and a World of book on business
(00:22):
as well.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
So I have two.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Podcasts, one for parents and one for business. So thank
you so much for joining me for UH parents, if
it's day, night, or evening, whatever it is, thank you
so much for joining me today. Today is gonna be
an exciting show. But let me tell you a little
bit about myself. I have thirty eight years in the
mental health field or slash neuroscience UH have worked with
over a hundred thousand kids with the ninety percent success right.
(00:45):
How I figured out success right is if they're going
to college and if they're moving forward. And most of
my kids I worked with was more of as a
combination of both. It was at risk kids, meaning that
the kids was from the foster care, from.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
UH, the juvie, or from the court. And I also
worked with some affluent families as well. So I worked
with the combination of both.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
And then all of my kids that I do have,
they're either doctors or lary. You're as commercial pilots say
everything else because I teach them something completely different and
teach them strategies and everything differently so they can go
further faster. So that being said, guys, I got a
core show for you. So most of my insights I
get this from the gym. You know, So I lived
(01:25):
in everybody in California. Most of my clients, most of
a lot of the parents that I work with is
you know, some of the parents who work with is.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
From the gym. Right.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
So the name of the program I called is the
speed of the Leader. Is the speed of the pack
is really for parents today, right, And I'm gonna I'm
gonna describe two different parents, same education, you know, saying
a financial whole nine yards, but two different behaviors. The
speed of leaders, the speed of the package for me
(01:57):
is that. So the first example, let's call Mike. Mike's
a good kid. You know, Mike's a good guy. Uh,
he's married you know for fifteen years, he hath two kids.
But Mike is negative. Mike is the most negative guy
in the world. He tells his kids that they can't
do much, that you should do this, they should do that.
Speaker 2 (02:18):
They're playing sports. They want them to. He want them
to make great grades. And Mike's just a mess.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
So I asked michae one that said, I have a
question for you. You want your kids to be straight
A students and play sports, and they're pretty good in sports.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
In high school. Where you a straight A student?
Speaker 1 (02:32):
He says, no, I was terrible, But if you're terrible,
But this kid is just negative. Mike is the most
And I know the guy is from the gym. He's
just a negative guy. Everything about his negative. He owns
his own business, but everything's bad.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
This is doing well.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
He paid for it, you know, he paid for a
couple of homes already. But he's just a negative guy.
So when I explained to him at the gym, I says,
the speed of the leader, at the speed.
Speaker 2 (02:54):
Of the pack.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
So I met his kids, and oh my god, his
kids is just a carbon con be negative. Didn't think
they could do this. They so doubted themselves. They overthought stuff,
and and and and when I looked at them, they
look like a mini They look like a mini mic right.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
I mean, then that's just pretty much was there. It
was behavior. You know, Mi's a great guy.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I talk to him all the time, but his attitude
and his vibration is very negative. You know, and you know,
and you know, he's a nice guy. We talk everything
else and then he goes to negative do him and gloom.
Everything's bad, everything's ticket, X, Y and Z. And when
I saw his kids, his kids behaved the exact same way. No,
(03:41):
let's take another guy, Ralph. Ralph, Oh my god, is
fun man. Ralph have energy, got fashion, he got excitement.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
Man. Every day I see him, he smiled at me.
He's positive, soll I mean, just just positive. So you
know his kids, oh my god.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
His kids was the exact same way, positive, pumped up, excited,
one of them wanting to be a damn doctor and
one of them wanting to be a lawyer. And and
their grades are you know, the grades are the grades
are decent, you know, no bees, you know, three point two.
But they're playing sports and they're doing extremely well in
sports and they're probably getting starship.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Right.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
So we have two kids from the same area, same education,
same family, men and my wives, same everything. The difference
is the attitudes, and the reason why I'm making this
such a huge point is what parents have to know, right,
the speedy leader, the speed of the pack, or in
common layman terms, monkey see monkey do. As a child,
(04:43):
we're gonna see, we're gonna do what we do and
see what we do from our parents. When they do it,
they give you a great example. Most guys know this,
and most and you might not know this. I come
from a family of ten, made of ten. I normally
mentioned that I was a baby boy too recently, but
you know, when you get past a certain age, yay,
I'm a baby boy now. So coming back from a
family of ten. My mom and my dad was like
(05:05):
poetry motion. Mom and dad was direct. I mean there
was no fluff, no anything else but my God, me
ta you man, my dad, Jesus marriage. It was the
most positive guy in the world, positive even see people.
How you doing today, baby, how you doing today? Sugar
and direct. As a point, Mom was on the other side,
(05:26):
you know, direct. People loved her as well, but she
was more of the education and bougie type, right. But
it was two blends. And when I was growing up,
I said I'd never be like mom and Dad. Never
never never never, Man, I lied, I lied.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
I lied. I'm just like that.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
I'm just like mom. I'm to the point, I'm direct,
I'm loud.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
People like me. I don't care if they love me.
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (05:54):
I'm just gonna be me right, And sometimes that get
on people nerves. But hey, you know, I tell myself,
if you're a parent, you need to work on yourself
because if you're working yourself, you can work in the kid.
If you can't work in yourself, you can't work in
your kid, and you are not doing what you need
to start to get doing right. So my biggest thing
about it is that listen to me, and my whole concept.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Is I act like Mom and Dad. I really do.
I never thought i'd say it, but I act like
Mom and Dad. You know, I go to mom.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
She was a preacher kid, so you know, I go
to church and most of my teachings are more.
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Biblical or have a spiritual principle to it.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Right, Dad, you worked two jobs, you know, sixteen hours
a day, you know, for forty years, you know, and then
he did a side a job and then he had
a garden, you know. And I work like that. I
work sixteen hours a day. People say you work so much,
you should have fun. I'm good, I'm doing what I love.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
This is fun.
Speaker 1 (06:47):
This is fun to me right, and I get bits
and pieces of my parents right. The reason why I'm
saying this is, listen to me, parents out there. If
you're negative, if you have doubt and fear and stress,
work on those issues because your kids are watching you.
(07:09):
How you handle stuff, how you deal with stuff. They're
watching you. So if they're watching you, why don't you
put on a great show. The grad show is being consistent.
The grad show is to listen to me. Hey, I'm
not perfect, because we're never perfect, and I don't want
to be perfect, to be truly honest with you, but
I can work on some of the stuff that I
need to work on and get better. Why because, as
(07:31):
I said, your kids are watching you. They might not
say anything, but they're watching you. Because I don't want
you to be like Mike. Mike's a great guy. I
love Mike to death, but Mike's a butt hit. His
kids are butt heads. His kids out themselves. They don't
want to do anything, and that's what they model. I
(07:52):
want you to be more like Ralph Man Ralph works
on himself. Ralph goes the person to the love and
to go to summers, go to watch sheet books.
Speaker 2 (08:01):
He told his kids to do the exact same thing.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
So I wanted to work with Mike and his kids.
Mike too wanted to work with me, but Ralph did.
Ralph kids are doing extremely well, Mike today, They're fine,
They're okay. You know, I had to figure it out
and so a soaking they and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (08:16):
Why you need to figure it out?
Speaker 1 (08:19):
So the question that I have is for you guys
the parents are there, right, Are you more like a Mike.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Negative he doesn't really they don't really work on themselves.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Or are you like a Ralph positive, have an attitude
of gratitude, teach your kids stuff or the similar as
to workshops, because here goes no, even if you're a
mic right now or the Mike meaning the family of
a Mic right because even Mike's wife, you know, Mike
wife is interesting as well. You know, she's a little
(08:55):
bit on the negative side, Ralph wife. Mike god man,
she's positive, she's bumped up, she's excited, she gets a
gym man, she speaks to me all the time.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
She's just so freaking nice. I met ralph kids. Oh
my god. So one of this kids plays sports, and
I kept on pushing her.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
I said, you know, you need to work out a
little bit her and she said, I have practice. I said,
I said, you want to let her man jacket and
all this stuff. It says, you know, if you do
some extra, I could bet your parents for do it.
And she said, how do you know? I said it
because I'm just old as your parents. And she started
to alive. She says, okay, So she started doing it,
and you know, I talked to Ralph, you know, wife,
and everybody else's house ends going. Man, John, I don't
(09:31):
know what you did, did John? But she she's working
out and she got stuff that she wanted to get
us to the course. It's a win win, right. So
my kids needed it bad. But Mike was not inside that.
Mike thought said he that he handled it. He dealt
with it, so anybody else can. So here's a question
(09:53):
that I have is for you the parents out there.
If you are a Mike, what can you do to
be a Ralph? Because what you gotta understand this and
and and and i'm'a turning this up from so I
wrote a book called Life's of Guard did and presents
unwomen to business growth.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
And in my book, I took uh the the the
the guy Allen private from my teenager book and put
him the business book. Here his quot thinking about it as
a teenager, the kid had some issues. He didn't deal
with that, right, and and and and at fifteen or sixteen,
seventeen and eighteen, he had issues. Now there's fifty years old,
here's a billionaire. But he's still a jerk, right, and
(10:33):
he still having problems. So here's a question that I have.
It's for you. If you are gonna be a mic
and if you see that you have some gaps to.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Close, close 'em, get coaching and get helped to read books,
to whatever takes.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Because remember this, parents, the speed of the leader is
the speed of the pack.
Speaker 2 (10:54):
What your kids see you do, they're going to do. Yes,
they're gonna do that. You might think it's like they're
not watching you everything else doing. They're watching you. They're
watching you. So it goes.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
If you like to section right here, and if you
have some comments that you want me to speak on
some type of topic or anything else.
Speaker 2 (11:17):
After thirty eight years in this field.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I've worked with every population you can actually imagine work
with parents with continus. But this to me, speed, the
leaders speed in the pack is huge because I'm telling you, you
couldn't tell me forty years ago that I'd be just
like just like mom and dad and my god and
after if tell you, man, when I was a teenager,
I didn't like them. I thought they're mean as hell.
I didn't start liking it until about in the mid
twenties thirties. I'm like, you know, they're really good people.
(11:41):
I just didn't. I didn't get this.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Right.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
And there's another thing about I have to mention this,
and it's gonna be another show, or I think I
did the show about this.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
The outcome is not to be your kids friend. The
outcomes is to be your is be parents to them.
That's it, no more, no loss but parents. Right. You
can be friendly to them, but you still got to
get a consequence. We'll go into that.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
I think I did that last year, but I do
it again because that's really a huge one. You know,
there's a lot of therapists, a lot of psychiatrists and psychotists,
so I'm you should be friends with your kids, and
I'm like, I don't want that model or that concept
because I know I like for my damn friends.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
I mean, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Sure about you, but that's what I do, and we
should have boundaries with their kids see Richard certain age.
And then of course you know they will see how
hard that you work and they can understand it. So
I challenge you, guys right now, I want you to
think about it. Am I a Mike Mike wife the
negative type? Or if I'm Ralph and if I'm in between,
(12:45):
how can I get more positive?
Speaker 2 (12:46):
What eras? Can I work in myself in to go
further faster? So it goes to you guys.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
If you like to show or any shows on behalf,
please give me five stars. If you are a business owner,
we do have a show as well called the Doctor
Johnalder Method, and I teach neurosciences, meet business Mastery. I
work with guys like the great Tony Robbinson, Chet Holmes
and Jay Abraham and all the rest of the guys,
and then I do neurosciences, meaning that a lot of
(13:15):
the times when I when I meet like clients or.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
People and they go to rector therapists for years or two.
Speaker 1 (13:21):
It takes me a couple sessions and a couple couple
weeks to a month'sash. You get the more they need
to be at and and and then then maybe a
couple of months where they can be fine. So just
do a different UH system strategies. I think everybody doing
a great job. I just I just want people to
to go further and faster and not stick around. I
seeing this, one guy said he had been a counselor
for ten years having the same issue, you know, And
(13:41):
I just shook my head and said, I'm sorry for that,
cause I don't think that shouldn't be worked. But that's
a different story. So anyway, guys, thank you guys so much.
Thank you for UH of spending some time with me today.
And remember the speed the leader, the speed of the pack.
Which one are you, Mike and his family or Ralph
and his family? Guys, Until the next time, taking always
(14:01):
got bluss.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Bye for now,
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