Thanksgiving

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Mad day that all right, gatheraround because it's time for the alex exem
Thanksgiving Special, or, as Ilike to call it, the Day of
the Turkey's Revenge. Now, Iknow, Thanksgiving is supposed to be all
about gratitude and family and overeating tothe point where you need a new belt.

(00:24):
But let's be real. It's twentytwenty three and the only thing we
can truly be thankful for is thatthe Wi Fi hasn't gone out yet.
Now, first off, let's talkabout the star of the show, the
Turkey. Every year, this poorbird gets all dressed up just to be
the centerpiece of a feast where UncleBob will inevitably argue about politics, Aunt

(00:47):
Karen will bring her infamous castle rolethat nobody touches, and your cousin's new
vegan girlfriend will give everyone a twentyminute lecture on tofu. I mean,
come on, mister Turkey deserves betterthan this. And can we talk about
Black Friday for a second. It'sthe only day where people trample over each

(01:07):
other for a half price toaster rightafter giving thanks for what they already have.
Nothing says gratitude like a fistfight overthe last discounted flat screen at Walmart.
But in all seriousness, Thanksgiving doesbring us together in a cramp dining
room arguing over who gets the lastpiece of pumpkin pie. And let's not

(01:30):
forget the tradition of going around thetable saying what we're all thankful for.
I'll start, I'm thankful for elasticwaistbands. Remember, Thanksgiving is the only
day of the year where it's sociallyacceptable to eat your weight and stuffing and
fall asleep on the couch by sevenpm. So let's raise our glasses or
turkey legs and toast to a dayfilled with family food, comas and trying

(01:55):
to explain to your grandma how youstill don't have a significant other. Hm
ah Yes, Happy Thanksgiving everyone,May your turkey be moist, your family
drama minimal, and remember, andnever forget. If the conversation at the
table gets too heated, just blameit on the trip to man Cheers,

(02:15):
oh Fred rabbigat on