August 22, 2023 • 48 mins
Do you get sidelined? Feel like you have rocks or boulders tossed in your way? In this episode of The Family Balancing Act - Empowering Women to Flourish, with my beautiful inside and out, guest Jen Stone-Sexton we have a dynamic discussion regarding the huge need for women to empower each other forward using faith and the support of each other to make a better world for all! Jen is a multi-talented and inspiring Christian Life Coach, Author, Speaker, Vocalist, Teacher, and founder of Freedom to Flourish Life Coaching. Check out her website and social media below!
Maureen Huntley, MS https://maureenhuntley.com/ https://www.facebook.com/maureen.huntley?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.facebook.com/TheFamilyBalancingAct?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.instagram.com/mohuntley/ www.ctrnetwork.com/thefamilybalancingact
VIA Character Strengths *FREE assessment:http://maureenhuntley.pro.viasurvey.orghttp://vitalhealthforlife.pro.viasurvey.org
Jen Stone-Sexton, CCLChttps://www.freedomtoflourishlifecoaching.comhttps://www.facebook.com/freedomtoflourishlifecoachinghttps://www.instagram.com/freedom_to_flourishhttps://www.flourishchristiancoach.comhttps://www.jen@flourishchristiancoach.com
Maureen Huntley, MS https://maureenhuntley.com/ https://www.facebook.com/maureen.huntley?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.facebook.com/TheFamilyBalancingAct?mibextid=LQQJ4d https://www.instagram.com/mohuntley/ www.ctrnetwork.com/thefamilybalancingact
VIA Character Strengths *FREE assessment:http://maureenhuntley.pro.viasurvey.orghttp://vitalhealthforlife.pro.viasurvey.org
Jen Stone-Sexton, CCLChttps://www.freedomtoflourishlifecoaching.comhttps://www.facebook.com/freedomtoflourishlifecoachinghttps://www.instagram.com/freedom_to_flourishhttps://www.flourishchristiancoach.comhttps://www.jen@flourishchristiancoach.com
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Episode Transcript
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(00:04):
Welcome to where the screen door slamsand the coffee mug hits the table.
You're listening to The Family Balancing Actwith me Loureen Huntley, Mom, grandmother
and board certified Holistic and Functional Medicinehealth coach. Each episode will explore the
realities of your day to day familylife in this modern era of non stop
(00:26):
texts, means and technology. Afterall, how do we keep ourselves saying?
Hand our family healthy? I'll haveamazing guests and thought provoking discussions,
and we'll take a holistic look atfamily health emotional, physical, mental,
and spiritual. Whether it's a microperspective of family involving healthy snacks, teenagers
(00:50):
with an attitude, stressed out,husband's partners, adult children, potty training,
elder care, grandchildren, college repor a macro perspective of world events
including blue earthquakes, the brainwashing,media, finances, and oh so much
more. We'll find a way together. So take a deep rap, exhale
(01:11):
and know that you're not alone.Bring on a Family Balancing Act. Do
(01:37):
you ever get sidelined, you know, taken off your plans for a day,
month, a year, or years. Does it feel like your path
has rocks? Or boulders tossed inthe way just as you were about to
do something for yourself, there's somethingyou really needed to do. Well,
Like so many women, moms,entrepreneurs, caretakers, or a combination of
(02:00):
all, we try to carry notonly our own stuff of life, hopes,
dreams, and mustus, but wealso carry other people's stuff our family,
children's spouses, partners, pets,extended family friends, oh, the
list of so long. We mightvow to stay on task and not get
(02:22):
sidelined, but then the thought ofhow to help those that need us just
creeps in. We feel it.Do you notice that you can be busy
doing something that you need to dosomething for yourself, and then the self
ordained rescuer shows up to the rescueWell, because you can fix it,
(02:43):
and you can fix it fast,a toy launch, maybe a broken heart,
YadA, YadA, YadA. Wellmaybe in a minute days, but
you will just get back to doingthe stuff you needed to do later.
Right, Well, sometimes it neverreally works out that way. Well,
I know, not for me andoften not for my clients. Nope,
the rescue are can toss me tothe side where I'm not completely sidelined on
(03:07):
a pile of rocks because I've chosento fix the victim. The truth is,
no one can fix another person.Only God can. So I've been
working on my soul work. It'sa process. This summer, I've been
(03:28):
so blessed to be surrounded by loadsof family and friends and really really good
people that energize me. Every year, as we approach the dog days of
summer, I start digging a littledeeper because I get tired of the just
sitting and relaxing playing crazy right,I love to play, but I like
(03:52):
to dig deep too. It's ashift. It's coming. I feel it.
I feel in in my heart.I feel it for myself, for
others. It's almost like going backto school and the fall well, my
inner shift. It's an emotional educationap class. As I'm a mom of
adult children and a grandmother to ayoung one, I'm still doing a lot
(04:14):
for my family. I'm cooking meals, i gather people together, I gather
friends to our table, and Ihold emotional space and deeper conversations with my
loved ones. And I love it. Yet I feel this pang of sadness
as there are a couple very importantpeople in my life that are not emotionally
(04:39):
present. It can't be in acrowd or one on one, and it
would be great to share and havethese deeper conversations with you know, let's
talk about feelings and God and thetruth, which you want. I want
to know what their true thoughts areand how they're feeling, but they just
(05:00):
can't do it yet. I'm alwaystaking that hopium pill, hoping, praying
that they'll feel more at ease intheir life. I do know that they
are not broken, though it's whothey are. My shift is acceptance and
full blown unconditional love. I knowthat wherever I go to even step back
(05:27):
or forward, there I am again. I am always facing myself. But
I know in my soul that Godis with me and that is where unconditional
love is. As I am findingpeace within the pieces of my life,
I accept that we are all alwaysin process. So welcome to the Family
(05:56):
Balancing Act. We're restoring the heartand art of mothering, and motherhood starts
with one conversation at a time.I'm Maureen Huntley, your host, Board
certified integrative, holistic and Functional medicinehealth coach, emotional freedom technique practitioner,
mom grandmother, wife and CEO ofmy family's home Operations. Well, don't
(06:21):
miss any of The Family Balancing Actepisodes because you can find us on Apple,
Spotify, Google Pod, Being,Pandora, iHeartRadio, and CTR Radio
Network and more where you can alsosign up from my monthly newsletter and grab
my free year round stressless tips atMaureen Huntley dot com. And you can
(06:46):
also find out about becoming one ofmy amazing clients. I really truly love
what I do holistic solutions for healthand well being for women, moms,
and their families. The Deep BreathExhale, It starts with you. I'm
(07:14):
so excited in this episode of TheFamily Balancing Act. I am so honored
to have Jen's stone Sexton. Sheis multi talented, without a doubt and
an inspiring Christian life coast coach,author, speaker, vocalist, teacher,
and founder of Freedom to Flourish LifeCoaching. Jen is passionate about encouraging,
(07:36):
equipping, and empowering women to flourishwith clarity, confidence and purpose. She
is the author of the Freedom toFlourish blog and prayer poem Prompt Prayer Poems
of Praise, Inspiring prayers to encourageyour heart and nourish your soul, which
(07:56):
I have a copy. I loveit. I love it, love it,
love it. Jen is currently writinga Freedom series of Bible studies scheduled
to publish in twenty twenty four.And she sings, She sings praise and
I am so honored to have youhere. Welcome jan, Thank you,
(08:18):
Marie. It's a joy to behere. Thank you so much. I
absolutely had thrilled for having this conversation. I have to want to tell our
listeners that I guess now. It'smonths ago. I did a show where
I described being in the car,my car, and this woman was being
I had gone to a retreat andit pulled in, and this woman was
(08:41):
losing her mind because I had accidentallytapped the side of her car when I
was getting out, but I checkedit and everything was okay, and she
was and I was so flustered,and I thought, oh my gosh,
this woman's going to be going into do this retreat. And as it
turns out, she ended up leavingand she wasn't doing the retreat, and
(09:01):
I thought, what am I doinghere? I should just turn around and
go home. I felt depleted.I felt like I couldn't fix what had
happened. I wanted to rescue.I wanted to fix that. That's not
going to work. And lowing beholdthis very tired, beautiful woman pulls into
that parking spot and she is gettingher stuff out, and I thought,
(09:22):
oh, oh, a new personwho's coming to the retreat. I think
I'm going to go over a costher and we were both exhausted and it
was just absolutely wonderful to have metyou. And we're like soul sisters since
then, so I'm I'm honored tohave you now on the show. So
thank you, Jen. That's thecool thing about going somewhere new, like
(09:43):
for signing up for a retreat andstepping out of your comfort zone, is
it's not just what you learn atthe retreat, it's the people you meet.
For me, every time I getout of my comfort zone and put
myself out there because I really wantedto be there to learn or to soak
in whatever the retreat is offering,I end up meeting people that that makes
(10:05):
it's so worth it. New friendships. I learned something new. I heard
a speaker years and years ago whenI was a changer. He said,
there are two things in life thatcan change your life the most, the
books you read and the people youmeet. Yeah, it's so grateful to
have met you. Oh. Likewise, gosh, it's my father. My
(10:26):
grandfather always would say. My motherwould always say, show me the people,
show me your friends, and I'lltell you who you are. Yes,
And that truth of that is soimportant to the people you connect with.
If they're not wholehearted souls, whatare you doing with them? What
(10:48):
are you doing there? Well?That Yeah, I've always been very careful
and selective about the people I surroundmyself with, and I look for friends
that I feel are people that Iwant to be more like, so people
that are ahead of me in theirlife and their spiritual growth, their character
development, whatever it is. I'vealways chosen friends like that, And it
(11:11):
doesn't mean that I'm not friends withother people too. But there's those those
circles of accessibility. So we haveour inner circle, we have our outer
circle, and then we have ouracquaintances, and then you know, just
the people that kind of know usperipherally in our lives. And I really
believe that we can have an influenceon everybody that we come in contact with,
(11:33):
and how are we influencing them?Are we speaking life and truth and
kindness and grace, or are weare we showing you know, the ugly
side like that the shadow side,And we all have that, we all
have a shadow side. But it'sto recognize that within ourselves, right and
(11:54):
to seek out people who speak lifeand who build us up and make us
want to be better than we are. There there is a way to speak
to a person that encourages them andinspires them to be better, and there's
a way to speak to a personthat makes them feel less. Then,
and I really believe and speaking lifeinto people. I mean, even Jesus
had had his spear, of hadhis circle. He had the inner circle
(12:18):
of Peter, James and John.He had then the twelve disciples, you
know, the other math Theory,the List and the other nine, and
then his mother, his mother,and then and then he had the followers,
right, and so the crowds andthe masses, well who had the
(12:39):
most access to him, his closestdisciples, and then the three And that's
really how how it is in ourown lives. You know, I have
about three to f I'm really closefriends, and they're not. They don't
all live near me, but they'rethe ones that I that have the most
access to me and I allowed tospeak into me. That's beautiful and that
(13:01):
I believe that when we all,when we look at our lives, you
see when you're even as you're speaking, that I'm thinking, Yes, they're
like five three to five people whowho I really you know, friends that
I really connect enough. Family isanother, that's another layer in there,
(13:24):
because they really are the beginning,the middle, and the end, because
you know, we started in afamily. We all come from some sort
of a family, and we havea family, even if you know it's
a partner, a pet, loadsof children, whatever your family is,
that's your family. And then andthen there's the ones that come with you
(13:48):
all the way through to the endof your life. And those are so
important. But it's the people wegather who become our really good friends along
the way, those three to fivepeople, as you say that, that
we chose with God's hand, right, friends are friends are the family you
choose, right right right. Idon't know who said that. It's a
(14:11):
quote, No, it's it's it'sI'll take it there. It says it
says anonymous. I don't know we'reall using it, but but I think
that that's so beautiful. Just andand I'm again honored to have you here
because I would love for my listenersto know a little bit about your journey.
Who you are, how did youget into this, you know,
(14:37):
life coaching business. But from aChristian point of view, I am you
know, I am myself. I'mChristian, but I'm just it's it's the
way you approach it is so differentand I love it and it really speaks
to me. So give you thefloor, give you the point of how
I got started in Christian coaching.You know, ultimately it was surrender and
(15:01):
obedience to what I felt God wasprompting and leading me to do. I
know that he actually called me whathe called me to in two thousand and
yet the doors didn't only open ituntil thirteen years later. Except I wasn't
paying attention. That's great that I'mtrying to talk to you know, showed
(15:22):
me in an email or a textor I can blimp across or the modern
way of dealing with things. Now, I don't say so. I just
I stubbornly kept doing what I've beendoing, even though it wasn't fulfilling,
and I was rather unhappy and frustrated. I felt this constant intertention between what
I was doing, which was workingin the legal profession and the corporate world,
(15:45):
and what I knew I was capableof doing, which is writing,
coaching, speaking, and teaching fulltime. I felt like I was made
for more, meant to do more, but I couldn't figure out how to
get there. So by twenty fifteen, nothing in my life was working,
and I do mean nothing except mymarriage. And so have you ever felt
(16:08):
marine like you wanted to create changein your life but you just didn't know
where to begin. Oh, allthe time. I can cycle in and
out of that often, and Isee my clients do that too, We
all cycle in and out of it. And yes, yes, that's where
coaching comes in. But I didn'trealize that it's right. So that's exactly
(16:33):
how I felt in twenty fifteen whenI partnered with my first life coach on
my journey to move from stuck tounstuck in my work, my purpose,
and the pursuit of my dreams.And it was really a truly transformative process.
Through coaching, I was equipped todo life differently, and I was
provided with the foundation that continues toinfluence the decisions I make today and how
(16:56):
I live. And I continue towork with coach and mentors to learn and
grow. You know, a coachis different than maybe a teacher. Sometimes
you can teach because you learn somethingthat you can teach, but coaching you
really have to have walked the journeyyourself. I mean, you don't see
a football coach out there coaching playerswho's never played football. And you know,
(17:19):
I'm a vocal coach. Also,I don't teach people how to sing
voice lessons without knowing how to singor having taken vocal pedagogy myself. I'm
also a yoga instructor. I don'tteach yoga without having been certified, so
that as a coach, you haveto have walked that journey. And the
same it's the same in life.There's a quote by Henry new One that
(17:42):
I love, and it says,you don't think your way into a new
kind of living. You live yourway into a new kind of thinking.
And that's only what coaching helps youdo. Those mindset shifts, gets those
perspectives, because perspective is everything.Yeah, and awareness, like we can
(18:04):
become aware of things through coaching thatwe were never aware before, and in
that awareness then we can make choicesand make better choices and take action.
So yeah, it's a safe,safe space. And it's different from being
a therapist. It's different from being, you know, a psychiatrist, because
(18:27):
coaching is is more of a listening, feeling and guiding. It's a guide
on the side, right, it'sholding a sacred space and asking questions and
providing insight and feedback for the clientto find their own way and their own
(18:49):
answers. Most of us don't giveourselves that kind of time and space in
our lives, nor do we havethat kind of guidance and quick in our
lives. One of my team coaches, Bridget Anderson, says it really says
it really well. She says thatcoaching is like driving and you're looking in
(19:10):
their in their you know, themirror. You're driving forward and you're going
down the road, and every nowand then you glance in the rear view
mirror. Because our past does influenceour future. Our past needs to inform
us. But if we're constantly staringin their rear view mirror, which is
typically more what happens in counseling,people get stuck, emotionally stuck, and
they have to they have to goback because the only way out is through,
(19:33):
and so they have to go back. But if you're staring in their
rear view mirror, you're you're ina parked car. You're not moving forward,
you can't move forward, and soyou deal with what's back there.
Coaching meets you where you are andhelps you move forward. And there are
times where I'm working with clients whoare getting counseling for certain issues in their
(19:56):
life over here, and then they'reable to coach on different different topics over
here, and so they do gotogether like they can marry together. Her
definitely, yeah, And that's becausecoaches should never take on anybody with let's
say, you know, blimia oralcoholism, and that you can take them
(20:18):
on if they are working with someoneof that profession to help to help ground
them in that and as a coach. And I love the analogy of the
car, the driving, the carlooking in the rearview mirror, because if
you were to look in the rearviewmirror all the time, which when I
drive, I don't, But inlife, you have to ask yourself but
(20:40):
how often are you talking about thepast, How often are you staying back
there and not working on it butruminating on it. That's the big word
of and working on this week isrumination, and a rumination just takes and
sucks time away because you're just replayingold stuff and staring in that mirror.
You're gonna you know, you're goingnowhere. The car will take you into
(21:03):
something that's not good, it's verytragic, or you're just stuck right and
you can't you can't move forward ifyou're constantly looking back and you said something
that I was, I was speakyou go so they go out to say
and that I just forgot. Sorumination, rumination tion, right, it's
(21:26):
just sort of like replay, replayingyeah, I remember now, And it's
coaching helps you learn to be present, and if you're living in the past,
you're not present. If you're fearfuland you're thinking about the future,
you're not present. It's good tohave goals and to be forward focused,
but most of us miss living inthe present, in the now moments.
(21:49):
And the truth is that unless youare in imminent danger the present, there
is nothing to fear, and thereis peace and there can be joy and
happiness that if that requires a mindsetshift of learning and Teacher Lady presents Yeah,
and that's what when I did myopening about people who are in one's
(22:14):
life who cannot be in that presentmoment. They can't talk about their feelings.
They can't because of the stuff thathappened in the rear view mirror.
They haven't worked on that, whatevertheir story is. It's hard because you
will love people up where they're at, and you know, all you can
(22:36):
do is just love them up wherethey are at, and except that they're
not broken, that's just who theyare. But if you have a great
coach like yourself or like myself,where we can actually hold the space to
allow them to flourish, which Ilove the name of your business, it's
so appropriate and freedom to flourish,and it's really the journey of my own
(23:03):
life. And my own coach hadthe word flourished on her website. I
just remember thinking, oh, Ilove that word, and that was that
was eight years ago, and itjust it just rerisonated with something inside of
me because I feel like so muchin my life I had held back to
to finish answer your question of howI started Freedom to Flourish life coaching.
(23:29):
Timing wise, really it was theculination of challenging and painful events. Loss
of three family members and eight monthschange of jobs, just a lot of
difficult things. You know. Thepandemic happened as well, And it was
all these different things that had happenedcombined with the realization that the years were
passing quickly. I'm like, I'min my fifty If not now, when
(23:52):
I what am? I? Wait? Wait until everything is perfect. There
is no perfect time to pursue yourdrinks. There is no perfect time to
deal with your issues. There isn'tthat things are not going to calm down
there, there's it's not going toget get to where Oh, let let
us get to the smooth sailing.That's just life. We are either entering
(24:15):
into a storm, in a storm, or in exiting a storm, or
some people like to say, we'reclimbing the mountain, we're in the valley,
we're climbing the mountain, we getto the summit, we're going down
into the valley. That is justlife. Sometimes those those last weeks,
sometimes if they last years and seasons, but that's just life. And so
when I stepped out in faith,and it was a big step of faith,
(24:37):
return school for coaching and business training, work with the business coach,
and launch this coaching ministry and practice, and so it's it's just it's been
an amazing journey. It's been sodifferent than going into the corporate world,
where I always felt like the squarehole in the round day. I think
the routh wall, you know.I like to say the star trying to
(24:57):
be shoved in the squirre. Youknow the book The Box of Shapes and
the children try to put the shapein the whole. Yeah, that's what
I felt like. I'm like,I don't fit and never fit. But
it's amazing how God has used allof that to prepare me for what I
do now. And I love whatI do. I finally have a clear
(25:18):
sense of purpose and I have theawesome privileged marine as you do as well.
I've seeing transformation in the lives ofthe women that I coach. I
get to witnesses women break free andrealize their significance and value and worth as
they flourished in their lives of clarity, competence, and purpose. And here's
what I know. When a womanknows her identity, and she's clear on
(25:42):
her worth and her value. Sheis unstoppable. And that's what I want
to see. I want to seemore unstoppable women on fire. I want
to see more women living out theirpurpose. I've been coaching and teaching in
some capacity for the past thirty sevenyears, and I've coached hundreds of women
to flourish as free, confident womenof God, leaving their insecurities and doubts
(26:06):
behind. I can clearly see howGod has used every painful and personal experience
in my life and all the thingsI've had to overcome as well. It's
every professional job or career experience toprepare and equipment for the work and I'm
doing now, and I'm so gratefulto get to serve in this way.
I can hear the power in yourvoice, and as you're speaking, I
(26:27):
feel it. I feel that energybecause we are in a time in history
where and I've been thinking about thisfor a while now, is that where
here we fought for you know,women's rights, women to be able to
vote, women to be able togo into the workforce, women and be
and you know, fight for paymentfor you know, salary equality and salary
(26:51):
quality and being and all the waythrough. And here we are in a
place where that very that very thingis being eroded. Women are turning it.
They would love for women to turnagainst women because of race, because
of affiliations with different organizations. Whenwomen, as you say, should be,
(27:18):
we should be working towards flourishing andempowering and stepping into that female energy,
God given gift. We need toown together, own empowered women,
empower other women. And I believewe're stronger together if we if we can
learn how to build each other upand encourage one another. You know,
(27:41):
a rioting tide raises all boats,and so there is no scarcity, there
is no lack if you stop comparingyourself to other women and I look at
the gifts that you have, andhow are you contributing, how how are
you living on purpose? I justfeel this sense of urgency in our times,
in the time that we're living in, and unprecedented things that we're seeing
(28:03):
and experiencing in our culture and inthe world, that there is the sense
of urgency. As the darkness increases, so will the light increase even more?
And we are called to be childrenof light. We are called to
be light and salt to a darkand dying world. There are people who
need the message of hope and truththat Jesus Christ springs, and so everything
(28:26):
about what we do is christ thatare biblically based principles that help people get
on track and live on purpose inthe truth. Because if you if you
don't have a standard that's not changing, then anything goes and anything's objectionable.
There's there's no objects that objectivity iswhat I'm trying to say, is objective
(28:51):
and objective. There has to bea standard. So for me personally,
the Bible is my standard. Ifit doesn't line up to God's word,
then that's not I'm not going there. That's the long the beautiful thing is
when Jesus was on the earth,he revealed himself as the Messiah publicly for
(29:11):
the first time to a woman.He was in Samaria. The Jews and
the Samaritans hated each other because theSamaritans were Jews who had intermarried into other
pagan nations, and the Jews consideredthemselves purists and the Samaritans were not,
(29:33):
and so there was a lot ofthese hundreds of years of hatred and animosity
between them, and so there wasJerusalem, and there was Judea, and
the Jews would literally walk around andgo out of their way, three days
out of their way to avoid goingthrough Samaria, which was the direct route
from Jerusalem to Judea. And anybody, if any of you listeners are watching
(29:56):
it shows and which I highly recommend, it's an amazing, amazing show.
This this, this shows this verywell. In season one and Jesus comes,
he tells the disciples, no,we're we're going through some mary go
we can't do that. And sohe comes to the well, Jacob's well,
(30:17):
and he's tired and hot and thirstybecause they've even walking a long distance.
And there's this woman drawing water fromthe well at noon. You can
find this in John four John John, chapter four. And she's there at
noon. Well, the women wouldcome out in the cool of the day
and the cool of the morning.I say, you know, five or
six am to draw water, becauseit was a tedious process to fill up
(30:40):
these water buckets and carries them backfar over your shoulder back to the city.
And Jesus asked her for a drinkof water, and and ultimately he
asked her a few questions and thenhe he gets to the heart of the
issue, and he says, goand call your husband, and she says,
I have no husband. He says, you're correct, and that you
(31:03):
have no husband. You've had fivehusbands and the man you're living with now
is not your husband. And she'slike, oh, I see you're a
prophet. And she says, youknow when when Messiah comes, he will
tell us all things. And hesays, I am I am the Messiah.
I'm he who's speaking to you.And she goes into the city and
starts telling everybody comes, see thisman who told me everything I've ever done?
(31:26):
Could he be then Thesssiah? Andhe chose to reveal himself to old
woman. Because God values and cherisheswomen just as much as he does men.
He created both of us. Hecreated both of us with different gifts
and abilities and strengths. And whenwe come together in a true partnership,
we're meant to balance each other out. We're meant to be compatible in a
(31:52):
way that makes a difference. Andthe way that our society has viewed women
over the millennium has have been todegrade and to treat less than and women's
rights promoted a lot of that butultimately it's not men who hold women back.
I really believe this. I believeit's women who hold theomen back.
(32:14):
I totally believe that. I totallyagree with you. It's been it's been
orchestrated that way, women against women, and and you know, all all
you have to do is look ata group of sixth grade girls, four
sixth grade girls in the way thatso mean, and and yet here it
(32:34):
is, we are so powerful whenwe are joined together, and it is
biblical. Your your example of howyou know Jesus stepped up and and really
you know, empowered this one womanto get to spread his word to begin
(32:54):
the process. Is it is sobeautiful because that's what we should be doing.
That's what we have within us isto do that and be better women.
I could be the beacon of light. So as a better woman,
as one that if it lives thisso truly in your in your heart and
(33:17):
your soul. What what was theKing the show up for you when when
you really felt Christ come into yourlife. My dad was a minister when
I was a little girl, andso I grew up carrying God's word and
(33:39):
all that. But it was aftermy parents divorced. My dad left the
ministry and actually went back to collegeat thirty five to become a chiropractor,
and he's still serving in that capacityat eighty three, which is amazing.
And so I we would have thesummers with him, and I remember hearing
a Southern Baptist preacher though I heardbrimstone kind of message whatever, and I
(34:04):
didn't I didn't want to burn inhell. So I walked up the aisle
and I accepted Christ as my savior. I also went to Christian schools,
and so I kind of took God'sword for granted. I was very I
had a lot of intellectual pride inwhat I knew, and I knew a
lot about God in my head andI really wanted to love him in my
(34:25):
heart. But there were a lotof unhealed wounds from my past that really
got in the way, and alot of barriers, like kind of barriers
that I help clients work through withthe tools that I've been given as a
Christian coach, that were really inthe way of me really receiving and taking
in God's love. And so Iand I just kind of lived my own
life and asked God to bless itand would do things and then go,
(34:47):
oh god, I'm so sorry andrepent. But it really wasn't until I
went through a really painful time inmy life and a lot of loss and
a lot of trauma in my earlythirties. And this was right after I
haven't been I had gotten divorced myself, just kind of repeating that, you
know, the pattern in my ownfamily there was, there was addictive behavior
(35:09):
and the marriage and really thought that, you know, ending the marriage was
a solution to that, and andfor me personally it looking back, it
probably wasn't. But you can't goback and pick up where you left off.
So there was just there was atremendous amount of pain in my life,
(35:30):
and I had gone off into thewhole New Age movement religious way well
made you can find it, youknow, Babylonian times that you know,
basically the heal yourself kind of philosophy, the feel good messages that there's no
judgment, there's no stin, everythingis good, you can do it yourself,
name it and claim it, andand all this self healing was so
(35:52):
time and zooming, it was soexhausting, and that I really didn't feel
better, and I you know,I just still I still felt stuck and
I had a lot to do.It's like booda yep. I had a
lot of people praying for me,and it was just like one day.
I don't remember what brought it toahead. It may have been around the
(36:16):
time that I lost my grandmother aswell, but it was like walking.
It's like I was walking around lifewith one of those slate maths on.
It was like God just ripped thesleep maths off my eyes and I could
see myself clearly for the first time. I could see my desperate need for
a savior. I could see thatI could not save myself. I could
(36:38):
not heal myself. And humans leftour own device as we tend to self
distract, and Jesus came to showus a better way. He came to
give us life and life more abundantly, as John ten Ten says, and
in our own fallen nature because ofthe choice Adam and Eve made, we
tend to make decisions that are prettyharmful. And it really takes receiving his
(37:05):
love in his grace that this unmeritedkindness and grace, I mean mercy is
not giving someone what they deserve.Grace is giving them what they don't deserve
as well, and so we aregiven his mercy. We're withhealth from the
wrath of God for our sin,and we're given this extravagant grace. Grace
(37:30):
is costly. There is no cheapgrace. Christ God clothed himself in human
form and grew as a baby throughlife as a man, defendant on other
people to take care of him,and chose to die a horrific, tortuous,
bloody, sacrificial death to pay theprice for God's wrath for our sins
(37:53):
and to give us the opportunity tochoose eternal life and a restore relationship between
God and humankind. And I justhadn't really ever taken all that in my
heart before. I kind of feltlike I was I was good enough,
I was doing good things. Youwere doing it because I've watched this path
off, so it's like you weredoing what you needed to do. Because
(38:17):
also there's just a lot there alot of information out there in the world
around and you get hit with allthese advertising things, other people you know
doing it. It's very easy tofall into that path. It is.
And here's the thing. It's deception, isn't so much all out blatant line
(38:42):
deception is hard to detect because it'smixed with the truth. And so Lucifer
Satan. Satan is the Hebrew namefor Lucifer. Lucifer was his name as
an archangel. Satan is the Hebrewname for adversary. That's what it means.
He's our adversary. And so hewas one of the most beautiful ruling
(39:07):
archangels. And so he's not thisdevil or skeleton with the pitchfork, and
you know that's not He's an angelof lights and so makes things look good.
I mean, how many of ushave followed down a path that looked
great and promised results, promised wonderfulthings and we found it was a dead
(39:30):
end road or it only brought usmore pain. I mean, we only
have to look at all the addictionsin our world today to know that if
people knew that that was a deadend road, then they wouldn't have started
to do it. Oh yeah,yeah, let me get addicted to alcohol
or drugs or pornography or whatever.And nobody sets out to do that intentionally.
(39:50):
It happens because it looks so promising, it looks so beautiful, It
looks like it's going to bring mepleasure or relieve my pain for its precious
pain is pain for amos expressions oursouls, and yeah, and it destroys
our lives. And that's the truth. And so the thing is is that
(40:10):
the deception, it is hard todetect. And so here's the thing about
people who can identify counterfeit money.They don't study counterfeit money. They study
the real thing, and they knowit so well that when they see counterfeit
money they can spot it instantly.They're not. They're not. So my
point is it's like, don't belooking at all. Okay, what's the
(40:30):
deceptions. We know God's words sowell that you can spot the counterfeit and
the philosophy in the vain, deceptivehell of philosophies of the world and the
things that promise good but don't reallydeliver. And nobody can. Nobody can
do God's word. But you,Okay, you can listen to a preacher,
(40:50):
you can listen to songs, youcan read books, you can read
commentaries, but nothing replaces getting inGod's word and reading it for yourself.
They're God tells us who he is, He tells us his nature, He
tells us how much he loves us, He tells us who we are,
he tells us the purpose for ourlives, and he gives us instructions on
how to live the best, mostfruitful, flourishing, free life possible.
(41:15):
And therein lies your life coaching.Don't know, I love it because as
you're speaking, something that I realizelately is that that there are a lot
of people I follow on YouTube ora lot of people have followed on different
platforms that were never speaking of,never ever spoke of their faith or if
(41:42):
they even had any, that arefinding finding their way. They're waking up,
that are opening a Bible and they'retalking about it now. And there
are people that I never imagine ina million years, Comedians that we're like,
you know, major drug addicts andjust off their rockers. Women who
(42:06):
were showed up and we're not veryThey didn't honor their bodies and they sold
their bodies through music and that whoare actually stepping away from that and calling
it out. And so I knowthere's hope, absolutely, and there is
something happening. There is a shifthappening, which I mentioned before. There
(42:29):
is a shift happening. And soas we closed to it. I would
love for you to tell everyone howwhat are you working on, and tell
a little bit about your programs andhow they could find you. Sure So,
Freedom of Flourish offers individual and groupcoaching courses and resources. We also
(42:52):
have a Freedom of Flourished blog anda monthly Flourished newsletter. You mentioned earlier
the prayer of Poems of Praise.Those are inspirational prayers to encourage your heart
and nourish your soul. They werecreated to give hope to your heart on
the hard days, remind you ofhow much you are loved when you doubt,
and to feed your soul with peaceand truth when fear screen Cloud.
(43:15):
I have just recently launched it's acourse called Intentional Living. To grow,
we must be intentional, and soI developed Intentional Living based on specific steps
and proven results with clients that I'veworked with individually. My desire was to
find a way for more women toexperience transformation in their lives through Christ than
(43:38):
a coaching So there's two options forintentional Living. One is an individual,
self paced course and the other isan an interactive group coaching community. So
it really depends on the know onyou how do you learn? What's your
time frame? Like, do youwant to absorb the video driven teaching and
(43:59):
the powerful content on your own timeframe or do you want to jump in
and be part of a weekly zoomfor eight weeks and have the opportunity to
watch and be part of individual coachingwithin a group and also work through the
materials that way. So there's thetwo options. And group coaching really allows
women to be encouraged and grow incommunity, and there will be opportunities for
(44:22):
that individual coaching within the group,like I said as well, so everyone
benefits from the questions ask. So, if you're listening to this, intentional
living is for you, if you'reready to take a transnational journey that will
coop you to live on purpose andyou will learn proven strategies that eight key
areas to increase your personal awareness,Identify and overcome limiting beliefs, prioritize and
(44:44):
maximize your time, exchange your strugglesfor purpose, get clear on your gifts
and strengths, be confident in whoGod created you to be and to live
intentionally. Wow that every woman excitedto offer this, I really am.
So. Then if you're interested inthe group coaching, The next masterclass begins
(45:06):
Tuesday, September twelve. Included ourvideo replays, materials, a private Facebook
group community, and two free bonusesto further support you and living intentionally.
You can find all this information outon our website at Flourish Christiancoach dot com
so Flourish Christiancoach dot com. IfFreedom of Flourish sticks in your head,
(45:29):
you can also find up at Freedomof Flourish Life Coaching dot com. You
can email me at Jen at FlourishChristiancoach dot com, and you can also
follow us on Facebook, Interest andInstagram. Wow. That is I know,
just knowing you and as I've gottento know you better over the months,
Jen is truly a great coach becauseshe asks really good, deep questions
(45:54):
that provoke a thought process. Atis this wonderful journey mapping out in your
life? I just think that you'reonto something we so need. We so
need this in the world. Weneed more Jesus in our world and in
(46:14):
our lives. It's right there forthe taking. And you've really put this
into a fantastic program. Thank you. I'm sorry, Go ahead, No,
it just has a process to walkforward, to go forward. Yeah,
Here's what I know, Marine,is that change, growth, progress
(46:35):
and success happen by choice, notby chance. When you combine the right
information with precise implementation and Holy Spiritinspiration, you experience lasting transformation because change
happens from the inside out, andto me, that requires the Holy Spirit.
So we follow a proven success pathwith a christ and our focus built
(46:59):
on timeless principles while incorporating powerful toolsso that you can achieve outstanding results and
maximize your God given potential. Sowe've coached hundreds of women to flourish as
free, confident women of God,leaving their insecurities and doubts behind. So
if you're listening, now's the timefor you to flourish in empowered freedom,
(47:21):
with clarity, confidence and purpose inyour life. Beautiful, oh my gosh,
my friend, thank you so much, absolutely fantastic. This will all
be in the show description and thereyou go. You will also be yes,
you'll definitely be able to find iton all the show description. So
(47:42):
as we say goodbye, I justagain thank you so much, And to
our listeners, if you can takea moment, close your eyes, put
your hands on your heart, andtake a deep breath and exhale and now
that you're not alone here on thefamily balance again, and thank you so
(48:04):
much to turn h
Welcome to where the screen door slamsand the coffee mug hits the table.
You're listening to The Family Balancing Actwith me Loureen Huntley, Mom, grandmother
and board certified Holistic and Functional Medicinehealth coach. Each episode will explore the
realities of your day to day familylife in this modern era of non stop
(00:26):
texts, means and technology. Afterall, how do we keep ourselves saying?
Hand our family healthy? I'll haveamazing guests and thought provoking discussions,
and we'll take a holistic look atfamily health emotional, physical, mental,
and spiritual. Whether it's a microperspective of family involving healthy snacks, teenagers
(00:50):
with an attitude, stressed out,husband's partners, adult children, potty training,
elder care, grandchildren, college repor a macro perspective of world events
including blue earthquakes, the brainwashing,media, finances, and oh so much
more. We'll find a way together. So take a deep rap, exhale
(01:11):
and know that you're not alone.Bring on a Family Balancing Act. Do
(01:37):
you ever get sidelined, you know, taken off your plans for a day,
month, a year, or years. Does it feel like your path
has rocks? Or boulders tossed inthe way just as you were about to
do something for yourself, there's somethingyou really needed to do. Well,
Like so many women, moms,entrepreneurs, caretakers, or a combination of
(02:00):
all, we try to carry notonly our own stuff of life, hopes,
dreams, and mustus, but wealso carry other people's stuff our family,
children's spouses, partners, pets,extended family friends, oh, the
list of so long. We mightvow to stay on task and not get
(02:22):
sidelined, but then the thought ofhow to help those that need us just
creeps in. We feel it.Do you notice that you can be busy
doing something that you need to dosomething for yourself, and then the self
ordained rescuer shows up to the rescueWell, because you can fix it,
(02:43):
and you can fix it fast,a toy launch, maybe a broken heart,
YadA, YadA, YadA. Wellmaybe in a minute days, but
you will just get back to doingthe stuff you needed to do later.
Right, Well, sometimes it neverreally works out that way. Well,
I know, not for me andoften not for my clients. Nope,
the rescue are can toss me tothe side where I'm not completely sidelined on
(03:07):
a pile of rocks because I've chosento fix the victim. The truth is,
no one can fix another person.Only God can. So I've been
working on my soul work. It'sa process. This summer, I've been
(03:28):
so blessed to be surrounded by loadsof family and friends and really really good
people that energize me. Every year, as we approach the dog days of
summer, I start digging a littledeeper because I get tired of the just
sitting and relaxing playing crazy right,I love to play, but I like
(03:52):
to dig deep too. It's ashift. It's coming. I feel it.
I feel in in my heart.I feel it for myself, for
others. It's almost like going backto school and the fall well, my
inner shift. It's an emotional educationap class. As I'm a mom of
adult children and a grandmother to ayoung one, I'm still doing a lot
(04:14):
for my family. I'm cooking meals, i gather people together, I gather
friends to our table, and Ihold emotional space and deeper conversations with my
loved ones. And I love it. Yet I feel this pang of sadness
as there are a couple very importantpeople in my life that are not emotionally
(04:39):
present. It can't be in acrowd or one on one, and it
would be great to share and havethese deeper conversations with you know, let's
talk about feelings and God and thetruth, which you want. I want
to know what their true thoughts areand how they're feeling, but they just
(05:00):
can't do it yet. I'm alwaystaking that hopium pill, hoping, praying
that they'll feel more at ease intheir life. I do know that they
are not broken, though it's whothey are. My shift is acceptance and
full blown unconditional love. I knowthat wherever I go to even step back
(05:27):
or forward, there I am again. I am always facing myself. But
I know in my soul that Godis with me and that is where unconditional
love is. As I am findingpeace within the pieces of my life,
I accept that we are all alwaysin process. So welcome to the Family
(05:56):
Balancing Act. We're restoring the heartand art of mothering, and motherhood starts
with one conversation at a time.I'm Maureen Huntley, your host, Board
certified integrative, holistic and Functional medicinehealth coach, emotional freedom technique practitioner,
mom grandmother, wife and CEO ofmy family's home Operations. Well, don't
(06:21):
miss any of The Family Balancing Actepisodes because you can find us on Apple,
Spotify, Google Pod, Being,Pandora, iHeartRadio, and CTR Radio
Network and more where you can alsosign up from my monthly newsletter and grab
my free year round stressless tips atMaureen Huntley dot com. And you can
(06:46):
also find out about becoming one ofmy amazing clients. I really truly love
what I do holistic solutions for healthand well being for women, moms,
and their families. The Deep BreathExhale, It starts with you. I'm
(07:14):
so excited in this episode of TheFamily Balancing Act. I am so honored
to have Jen's stone Sexton. Sheis multi talented, without a doubt and
an inspiring Christian life coast coach,author, speaker, vocalist, teacher,
and founder of Freedom to Flourish LifeCoaching. Jen is passionate about encouraging,
(07:36):
equipping, and empowering women to flourishwith clarity, confidence and purpose. She
is the author of the Freedom toFlourish blog and prayer poem Prompt Prayer Poems
of Praise, Inspiring prayers to encourageyour heart and nourish your soul, which
(07:56):
I have a copy. I loveit. I love it, love it,
love it. Jen is currently writinga Freedom series of Bible studies scheduled
to publish in twenty twenty four.And she sings, She sings praise and
I am so honored to have youhere. Welcome jan, Thank you,
(08:18):
Marie. It's a joy to behere. Thank you so much. I
absolutely had thrilled for having this conversation. I have to want to tell our
listeners that I guess now. It'smonths ago. I did a show where
I described being in the car,my car, and this woman was being
I had gone to a retreat andit pulled in, and this woman was
(08:41):
losing her mind because I had accidentallytapped the side of her car when I
was getting out, but I checkedit and everything was okay, and she
was and I was so flustered,and I thought, oh my gosh,
this woman's going to be going into do this retreat. And as it
turns out, she ended up leavingand she wasn't doing the retreat, and
(09:01):
I thought, what am I doinghere? I should just turn around and
go home. I felt depleted.I felt like I couldn't fix what had
happened. I wanted to rescue.I wanted to fix that. That's not
going to work. And lowing beholdthis very tired, beautiful woman pulls into
that parking spot and she is gettingher stuff out, and I thought,
(09:22):
oh, oh, a new personwho's coming to the retreat. I think
I'm going to go over a costher and we were both exhausted and it
was just absolutely wonderful to have metyou. And we're like soul sisters since
then, so I'm I'm honored tohave you now on the show. So
thank you, Jen. That's thecool thing about going somewhere new, like
(09:43):
for signing up for a retreat andstepping out of your comfort zone, is
it's not just what you learn atthe retreat, it's the people you meet.
For me, every time I getout of my comfort zone and put
myself out there because I really wantedto be there to learn or to soak
in whatever the retreat is offering,I end up meeting people that that makes
(10:05):
it's so worth it. New friendships. I learned something new. I heard
a speaker years and years ago whenI was a changer. He said,
there are two things in life thatcan change your life the most, the
books you read and the people youmeet. Yeah, it's so grateful to
have met you. Oh. Likewise, gosh, it's my father. My
(10:26):
grandfather always would say. My motherwould always say, show me the people,
show me your friends, and I'lltell you who you are. Yes,
And that truth of that is soimportant to the people you connect with.
If they're not wholehearted souls, whatare you doing with them? What
(10:48):
are you doing there? Well?That Yeah, I've always been very careful
and selective about the people I surroundmyself with, and I look for friends
that I feel are people that Iwant to be more like, so people
that are ahead of me in theirlife and their spiritual growth, their character
development, whatever it is. I'vealways chosen friends like that, And it
(11:11):
doesn't mean that I'm not friends withother people too. But there's those those
circles of accessibility. So we haveour inner circle, we have our outer
circle, and then we have ouracquaintances, and then you know, just
the people that kind of know usperipherally in our lives. And I really
believe that we can have an influenceon everybody that we come in contact with,
(11:33):
and how are we influencing them?Are we speaking life and truth and
kindness and grace, or are weare we showing you know, the ugly
side like that the shadow side,And we all have that, we all
have a shadow side. But it'sto recognize that within ourselves, right and
(11:54):
to seek out people who speak lifeand who build us up and make us
want to be better than we are. There there is a way to speak
to a person that encourages them andinspires them to be better, and there's
a way to speak to a personthat makes them feel less. Then,
and I really believe and speaking lifeinto people. I mean, even Jesus
had had his spear, of hadhis circle. He had the inner circle
(12:18):
of Peter, James and John.He had then the twelve disciples, you
know, the other math Theory,the List and the other nine, and
then his mother, his mother,and then and then he had the followers,
right, and so the crowds andthe masses, well who had the
(12:39):
most access to him, his closestdisciples, and then the three And that's
really how how it is in ourown lives. You know, I have
about three to f I'm really closefriends, and they're not. They don't
all live near me, but they'rethe ones that I that have the most
access to me and I allowed tospeak into me. That's beautiful and that
(13:01):
I believe that when we all,when we look at our lives, you
see when you're even as you're speaking, that I'm thinking, Yes, they're
like five three to five people whowho I really you know, friends that
I really connect enough. Family isanother, that's another layer in there,
(13:24):
because they really are the beginning,the middle, and the end, because
you know, we started in afamily. We all come from some sort
of a family, and we havea family, even if you know it's
a partner, a pet, loadsof children, whatever your family is,
that's your family. And then andthen there's the ones that come with you
(13:48):
all the way through to the endof your life. And those are so
important. But it's the people wegather who become our really good friends along
the way, those three to fivepeople, as you say that, that
we chose with God's hand, right, friends are friends are the family you
choose, right right right. Idon't know who said that. It's a
(14:11):
quote, No, it's it's it'sI'll take it there. It says it
says anonymous. I don't know we'reall using it, but but I think
that that's so beautiful. Just andand I'm again honored to have you here
because I would love for my listenersto know a little bit about your journey.
Who you are, how did youget into this, you know,
(14:37):
life coaching business. But from aChristian point of view, I am you
know, I am myself. I'mChristian, but I'm just it's it's the
way you approach it is so differentand I love it and it really speaks
to me. So give you thefloor, give you the point of how
I got started in Christian coaching.You know, ultimately it was surrender and
(15:01):
obedience to what I felt God wasprompting and leading me to do. I
know that he actually called me whathe called me to in two thousand and
yet the doors didn't only open ituntil thirteen years later. Except I wasn't
paying attention. That's great that I'mtrying to talk to you know, showed
(15:22):
me in an email or a textor I can blimp across or the modern
way of dealing with things. Now, I don't say so. I just
I stubbornly kept doing what I've beendoing, even though it wasn't fulfilling,
and I was rather unhappy and frustrated. I felt this constant intertention between what
I was doing, which was workingin the legal profession and the corporate world,
(15:45):
and what I knew I was capableof doing, which is writing,
coaching, speaking, and teaching fulltime. I felt like I was made
for more, meant to do more, but I couldn't figure out how to
get there. So by twenty fifteen, nothing in my life was working,
and I do mean nothing except mymarriage. And so have you ever felt
(16:08):
marine like you wanted to create changein your life but you just didn't know
where to begin. Oh, allthe time. I can cycle in and
out of that often, and Isee my clients do that too, We
all cycle in and out of it. And yes, yes, that's where
coaching comes in. But I didn'trealize that it's right. So that's exactly
(16:33):
how I felt in twenty fifteen whenI partnered with my first life coach on
my journey to move from stuck tounstuck in my work, my purpose,
and the pursuit of my dreams.And it was really a truly transformative process.
Through coaching, I was equipped todo life differently, and I was
provided with the foundation that continues toinfluence the decisions I make today and how
(16:56):
I live. And I continue towork with coach and mentors to learn and
grow. You know, a coachis different than maybe a teacher. Sometimes
you can teach because you learn somethingthat you can teach, but coaching you
really have to have walked the journeyyourself. I mean, you don't see
a football coach out there coaching playerswho's never played football. And you know,
(17:19):
I'm a vocal coach. Also,I don't teach people how to sing
voice lessons without knowing how to singor having taken vocal pedagogy myself. I'm
also a yoga instructor. I don'tteach yoga without having been certified, so
that as a coach, you haveto have walked that journey. And the
same it's the same in life.There's a quote by Henry new One that
(17:42):
I love, and it says,you don't think your way into a new
kind of living. You live yourway into a new kind of thinking.
And that's only what coaching helps youdo. Those mindset shifts, gets those
perspectives, because perspective is everything.Yeah, and awareness, like we can
(18:04):
become aware of things through coaching thatwe were never aware before, and in
that awareness then we can make choicesand make better choices and take action.
So yeah, it's a safe,safe space. And it's different from being
a therapist. It's different from being, you know, a psychiatrist, because
(18:27):
coaching is is more of a listening, feeling and guiding. It's a guide
on the side, right, it'sholding a sacred space and asking questions and
providing insight and feedback for the clientto find their own way and their own
(18:49):
answers. Most of us don't giveourselves that kind of time and space in
our lives, nor do we havethat kind of guidance and quick in our
lives. One of my team coaches, Bridget Anderson, says it really says
it really well. She says thatcoaching is like driving and you're looking in
(19:10):
their in their you know, themirror. You're driving forward and you're going
down the road, and every nowand then you glance in the rear view
mirror. Because our past does influenceour future. Our past needs to inform
us. But if we're constantly staringin their rear view mirror, which is
typically more what happens in counseling,people get stuck, emotionally stuck, and
they have to they have to goback because the only way out is through,
(19:33):
and so they have to go back. But if you're staring in their
rear view mirror, you're you're ina parked car. You're not moving forward,
you can't move forward, and soyou deal with what's back there.
Coaching meets you where you are andhelps you move forward. And there are
times where I'm working with clients whoare getting counseling for certain issues in their
(19:56):
life over here, and then they'reable to coach on different different topics over
here, and so they do gotogether like they can marry together. Her
definitely, yeah, And that's becausecoaches should never take on anybody with let's
say, you know, blimia oralcoholism, and that you can take them
(20:18):
on if they are working with someoneof that profession to help to help ground
them in that and as a coach. And I love the analogy of the
car, the driving, the carlooking in the rearview mirror, because if
you were to look in the rearviewmirror all the time, which when I
drive, I don't, But inlife, you have to ask yourself but
(20:40):
how often are you talking about thepast, How often are you staying back
there and not working on it butruminating on it. That's the big word
of and working on this week isrumination, and a rumination just takes and
sucks time away because you're just replayingold stuff and staring in that mirror.
You're gonna you know, you're goingnowhere. The car will take you into
(21:03):
something that's not good, it's verytragic, or you're just stuck right and
you can't you can't move forward ifyou're constantly looking back and you said something
that I was, I was speakyou go so they go out to say
and that I just forgot. Sorumination, rumination tion, right, it's
(21:26):
just sort of like replay, replayingyeah, I remember now, And it's
coaching helps you learn to be present, and if you're living in the past,
you're not present. If you're fearfuland you're thinking about the future,
you're not present. It's good tohave goals and to be forward focused,
but most of us miss living inthe present, in the now moments.
(21:49):
And the truth is that unless youare in imminent danger the present, there
is nothing to fear, and thereis peace and there can be joy and
happiness that if that requires a mindsetshift of learning and Teacher Lady presents Yeah,
and that's what when I did myopening about people who are in one's
(22:14):
life who cannot be in that presentmoment. They can't talk about their feelings.
They can't because of the stuff thathappened in the rear view mirror.
They haven't worked on that, whatevertheir story is. It's hard because you
will love people up where they're at, and you know, all you can
(22:36):
do is just love them up wherethey are at, and except that they're
not broken, that's just who theyare. But if you have a great
coach like yourself or like myself,where we can actually hold the space to
allow them to flourish, which Ilove the name of your business, it's
so appropriate and freedom to flourish,and it's really the journey of my own
(23:03):
life. And my own coach hadthe word flourished on her website. I
just remember thinking, oh, Ilove that word, and that was that
was eight years ago, and itjust it just rerisonated with something inside of
me because I feel like so muchin my life I had held back to
to finish answer your question of howI started Freedom to Flourish life coaching.
(23:29):
Timing wise, really it was theculination of challenging and painful events. Loss
of three family members and eight monthschange of jobs, just a lot of
difficult things. You know. Thepandemic happened as well, And it was
all these different things that had happenedcombined with the realization that the years were
passing quickly. I'm like, I'min my fifty If not now, when
(23:52):
I what am? I? Wait? Wait until everything is perfect. There
is no perfect time to pursue yourdrinks. There is no perfect time to
deal with your issues. There isn'tthat things are not going to calm down
there, there's it's not going toget get to where Oh, let let
us get to the smooth sailing.That's just life. We are either entering
(24:15):
into a storm, in a storm, or in exiting a storm, or
some people like to say, we'reclimbing the mountain, we're in the valley,
we're climbing the mountain, we getto the summit, we're going down
into the valley. That is justlife. Sometimes those those last weeks,
sometimes if they last years and seasons, but that's just life. And so
when I stepped out in faith,and it was a big step of faith,
(24:37):
return school for coaching and business training, work with the business coach,
and launch this coaching ministry and practice, and so it's it's just it's been
an amazing journey. It's been sodifferent than going into the corporate world,
where I always felt like the squarehole in the round day. I think
the routh wall, you know.I like to say the star trying to
(24:57):
be shoved in the squirre. Youknow the book The Box of Shapes and
the children try to put the shapein the whole. Yeah, that's what
I felt like. I'm like,I don't fit and never fit. But
it's amazing how God has used allof that to prepare me for what I
do now. And I love whatI do. I finally have a clear
(25:18):
sense of purpose and I have theawesome privileged marine as you do as well.
I've seeing transformation in the lives ofthe women that I coach. I
get to witnesses women break free andrealize their significance and value and worth as
they flourished in their lives of clarity, competence, and purpose. And here's
what I know. When a womanknows her identity, and she's clear on
(25:42):
her worth and her value. Sheis unstoppable. And that's what I want
to see. I want to seemore unstoppable women on fire. I want
to see more women living out theirpurpose. I've been coaching and teaching in
some capacity for the past thirty sevenyears, and I've coached hundreds of women
to flourish as free, confident womenof God, leaving their insecurities and doubts
(26:06):
behind. I can clearly see howGod has used every painful and personal experience
in my life and all the thingsI've had to overcome as well. It's
every professional job or career experience toprepare and equipment for the work and I'm
doing now, and I'm so gratefulto get to serve in this way.
I can hear the power in yourvoice, and as you're speaking, I
(26:27):
feel it. I feel that energybecause we are in a time in history
where and I've been thinking about thisfor a while now, is that where
here we fought for you know,women's rights, women to be able to
vote, women to be able togo into the workforce, women and be
and you know, fight for paymentfor you know, salary equality and salary
(26:51):
quality and being and all the waythrough. And here we are in a
place where that very that very thingis being eroded. Women are turning it.
They would love for women to turnagainst women because of race, because
of affiliations with different organizations. Whenwomen, as you say, should be,
(27:18):
we should be working towards flourishing andempowering and stepping into that female energy,
God given gift. We need toown together, own empowered women,
empower other women. And I believewe're stronger together if we if we can
learn how to build each other upand encourage one another. You know,
(27:41):
a rioting tide raises all boats,and so there is no scarcity, there
is no lack if you stop comparingyourself to other women and I look at
the gifts that you have, andhow are you contributing, how how are
you living on purpose? I justfeel this sense of urgency in our times,
in the time that we're living in, and unprecedented things that we're seeing
(28:03):
and experiencing in our culture and inthe world, that there is the sense
of urgency. As the darkness increases, so will the light increase even more?
And we are called to be childrenof light. We are called to
be light and salt to a darkand dying world. There are people who
need the message of hope and truththat Jesus Christ springs, and so everything
(28:26):
about what we do is christ thatare biblically based principles that help people get
on track and live on purpose inthe truth. Because if you if you
don't have a standard that's not changing, then anything goes and anything's objectionable.
There's there's no objects that objectivity iswhat I'm trying to say, is objective
(28:51):
and objective. There has to bea standard. So for me personally,
the Bible is my standard. Ifit doesn't line up to God's word,
then that's not I'm not going there. That's the long the beautiful thing is
when Jesus was on the earth,he revealed himself as the Messiah publicly for
(29:11):
the first time to a woman.He was in Samaria. The Jews and
the Samaritans hated each other because theSamaritans were Jews who had intermarried into other
pagan nations, and the Jews consideredthemselves purists and the Samaritans were not,
(29:33):
and so there was a lot ofthese hundreds of years of hatred and animosity
between them, and so there wasJerusalem, and there was Judea, and
the Jews would literally walk around andgo out of their way, three days
out of their way to avoid goingthrough Samaria, which was the direct route
from Jerusalem to Judea. And anybody, if any of you listeners are watching
(29:56):
it shows and which I highly recommend, it's an amazing, amazing show.
This this, this shows this verywell. In season one and Jesus comes,
he tells the disciples, no,we're we're going through some mary go
we can't do that. And sohe comes to the well, Jacob's well,
(30:17):
and he's tired and hot and thirstybecause they've even walking a long distance.
And there's this woman drawing water fromthe well at noon. You can
find this in John four John John, chapter four. And she's there at
noon. Well, the women wouldcome out in the cool of the day
and the cool of the morning.I say, you know, five or
six am to draw water, becauseit was a tedious process to fill up
(30:40):
these water buckets and carries them backfar over your shoulder back to the city.
And Jesus asked her for a drinkof water, and and ultimately he
asked her a few questions and thenhe he gets to the heart of the
issue, and he says, goand call your husband, and she says,
I have no husband. He says, you're correct, and that you
(31:03):
have no husband. You've had fivehusbands and the man you're living with now
is not your husband. And she'slike, oh, I see you're a
prophet. And she says, youknow when when Messiah comes, he will
tell us all things. And hesays, I am I am the Messiah.
I'm he who's speaking to you.And she goes into the city and
starts telling everybody comes, see thisman who told me everything I've ever done?
(31:26):
Could he be then Thesssiah? Andhe chose to reveal himself to old
woman. Because God values and cherisheswomen just as much as he does men.
He created both of us. Hecreated both of us with different gifts
and abilities and strengths. And whenwe come together in a true partnership,
we're meant to balance each other out. We're meant to be compatible in a
(31:52):
way that makes a difference. Andthe way that our society has viewed women
over the millennium has have been todegrade and to treat less than and women's
rights promoted a lot of that butultimately it's not men who hold women back.
I really believe this. I believeit's women who hold theomen back.
(32:14):
I totally believe that. I totallyagree with you. It's been it's been
orchestrated that way, women against women, and and you know, all all
you have to do is look ata group of sixth grade girls, four
sixth grade girls in the way thatso mean, and and yet here it
(32:34):
is, we are so powerful whenwe are joined together, and it is
biblical. Your your example of howyou know Jesus stepped up and and really
you know, empowered this one womanto get to spread his word to begin
(32:54):
the process. Is it is sobeautiful because that's what we should be doing.
That's what we have within us isto do that and be better women.
I could be the beacon of light. So as a better woman,
as one that if it lives thisso truly in your in your heart and
(33:17):
your soul. What what was theKing the show up for you when when
you really felt Christ come into yourlife. My dad was a minister when
I was a little girl, andso I grew up carrying God's word and
(33:39):
all that. But it was aftermy parents divorced. My dad left the
ministry and actually went back to collegeat thirty five to become a chiropractor,
and he's still serving in that capacityat eighty three, which is amazing.
And so I we would have thesummers with him, and I remember hearing
a Southern Baptist preacher though I heardbrimstone kind of message whatever, and I
(34:04):
didn't I didn't want to burn inhell. So I walked up the aisle
and I accepted Christ as my savior. I also went to Christian schools,
and so I kind of took God'sword for granted. I was very I
had a lot of intellectual pride inwhat I knew, and I knew a
lot about God in my head andI really wanted to love him in my
(34:25):
heart. But there were a lotof unhealed wounds from my past that really
got in the way, and alot of barriers, like kind of barriers
that I help clients work through withthe tools that I've been given as a
Christian coach, that were really inthe way of me really receiving and taking
in God's love. And so Iand I just kind of lived my own
life and asked God to bless itand would do things and then go,
(34:47):
oh god, I'm so sorry andrepent. But it really wasn't until I
went through a really painful time inmy life and a lot of loss and
a lot of trauma in my earlythirties. And this was right after I
haven't been I had gotten divorced myself, just kind of repeating that, you
know, the pattern in my ownfamily there was, there was addictive behavior
(35:09):
and the marriage and really thought that, you know, ending the marriage was
a solution to that, and andfor me personally it looking back, it
probably wasn't. But you can't goback and pick up where you left off.
So there was just there was atremendous amount of pain in my life,
(35:30):
and I had gone off into thewhole New Age movement religious way well
made you can find it, youknow, Babylonian times that you know,
basically the heal yourself kind of philosophy, the feel good messages that there's no
judgment, there's no stin, everythingis good, you can do it yourself,
name it and claim it, andand all this self healing was so
(35:52):
time and zooming, it was soexhausting, and that I really didn't feel
better, and I you know,I just still I still felt stuck and
I had a lot to do.It's like booda yep. I had a
lot of people praying for me,and it was just like one day.
I don't remember what brought it toahead. It may have been around the
(36:16):
time that I lost my grandmother aswell, but it was like walking.
It's like I was walking around lifewith one of those slate maths on.
It was like God just ripped thesleep maths off my eyes and I could
see myself clearly for the first time. I could see my desperate need for
a savior. I could see thatI could not save myself. I could
(36:38):
not heal myself. And humans leftour own device as we tend to self
distract, and Jesus came to showus a better way. He came to
give us life and life more abundantly, as John ten Ten says, and
in our own fallen nature because ofthe choice Adam and Eve made, we
tend to make decisions that are prettyharmful. And it really takes receiving his
(37:05):
love in his grace that this unmeritedkindness and grace, I mean mercy is
not giving someone what they deserve.Grace is giving them what they don't deserve
as well, and so we aregiven his mercy. We're withhealth from the
wrath of God for our sin,and we're given this extravagant grace. Grace
(37:30):
is costly. There is no cheapgrace. Christ God clothed himself in human
form and grew as a baby throughlife as a man, defendant on other
people to take care of him,and chose to die a horrific, tortuous,
bloody, sacrificial death to pay theprice for God's wrath for our sins
(37:53):
and to give us the opportunity tochoose eternal life and a restore relationship between
God and humankind. And I justhadn't really ever taken all that in my
heart before. I kind of feltlike I was I was good enough,
I was doing good things. Youwere doing it because I've watched this path
off, so it's like you weredoing what you needed to do. Because
(38:17):
also there's just a lot there alot of information out there in the world
around and you get hit with allthese advertising things, other people you know
doing it. It's very easy tofall into that path. It is.
And here's the thing. It's deception, isn't so much all out blatant line
(38:42):
deception is hard to detect because it'smixed with the truth. And so Lucifer
Satan. Satan is the Hebrew namefor Lucifer. Lucifer was his name as
an archangel. Satan is the Hebrewname for adversary. That's what it means.
He's our adversary. And so hewas one of the most beautiful ruling
(39:07):
archangels. And so he's not thisdevil or skeleton with the pitchfork, and
you know that's not He's an angelof lights and so makes things look good.
I mean, how many of ushave followed down a path that looked
great and promised results, promised wonderfulthings and we found it was a dead
(39:30):
end road or it only brought usmore pain. I mean, we only
have to look at all the addictionsin our world today to know that if
people knew that that was a deadend road, then they wouldn't have started
to do it. Oh yeah,yeah, let me get addicted to alcohol
or drugs or pornography or whatever.And nobody sets out to do that intentionally.
(39:50):
It happens because it looks so promising, it looks so beautiful, It
looks like it's going to bring mepleasure or relieve my pain for its precious
pain is pain for amos expressions oursouls, and yeah, and it destroys
our lives. And that's the truth. And so the thing is is that
(40:10):
the deception, it is hard todetect. And so here's the thing about
people who can identify counterfeit money.They don't study counterfeit money. They study
the real thing, and they knowit so well that when they see counterfeit
money they can spot it instantly.They're not. They're not. So my
point is it's like, don't belooking at all. Okay, what's the
(40:30):
deceptions. We know God's words sowell that you can spot the counterfeit and
the philosophy in the vain, deceptivehell of philosophies of the world and the
things that promise good but don't reallydeliver. And nobody can. Nobody can
do God's word. But you,Okay, you can listen to a preacher,
(40:50):
you can listen to songs, youcan read books, you can read
commentaries, but nothing replaces getting inGod's word and reading it for yourself.
They're God tells us who he is, He tells us his nature, He
tells us how much he loves us, He tells us who we are,
he tells us the purpose for ourlives, and he gives us instructions on
how to live the best, mostfruitful, flourishing, free life possible.
(41:15):
And therein lies your life coaching.Don't know, I love it because as
you're speaking, something that I realizelately is that that there are a lot
of people I follow on YouTube ora lot of people have followed on different
platforms that were never speaking of,never ever spoke of their faith or if
(41:42):
they even had any, that arefinding finding their way. They're waking up,
that are opening a Bible and they'retalking about it now. And there
are people that I never imagine ina million years, Comedians that we're like,
you know, major drug addicts andjust off their rockers. Women who
(42:06):
were showed up and we're not veryThey didn't honor their bodies and they sold
their bodies through music and that whoare actually stepping away from that and calling
it out. And so I knowthere's hope, absolutely, and there is
something happening. There is a shifthappening, which I mentioned before. There
(42:29):
is a shift happening. And soas we closed to it. I would
love for you to tell everyone howwhat are you working on, and tell
a little bit about your programs andhow they could find you. Sure So,
Freedom of Flourish offers individual and groupcoaching courses and resources. We also
(42:52):
have a Freedom of Flourished blog anda monthly Flourished newsletter. You mentioned earlier
the prayer of Poems of Praise.Those are inspirational prayers to encourage your heart
and nourish your soul. They werecreated to give hope to your heart on
the hard days, remind you ofhow much you are loved when you doubt,
and to feed your soul with peaceand truth when fear screen Cloud.
(43:15):
I have just recently launched it's acourse called Intentional Living. To grow,
we must be intentional, and soI developed Intentional Living based on specific steps
and proven results with clients that I'veworked with individually. My desire was to
find a way for more women toexperience transformation in their lives through Christ than
(43:38):
a coaching So there's two options forintentional Living. One is an individual,
self paced course and the other isan an interactive group coaching community. So
it really depends on the know onyou how do you learn? What's your
time frame? Like, do youwant to absorb the video driven teaching and
(43:59):
the powerful content on your own timeframe or do you want to jump in
and be part of a weekly zoomfor eight weeks and have the opportunity to
watch and be part of individual coachingwithin a group and also work through the
materials that way. So there's thetwo options. And group coaching really allows
women to be encouraged and grow incommunity, and there will be opportunities for
(44:22):
that individual coaching within the group,like I said as well, so everyone
benefits from the questions ask. So, if you're listening to this, intentional
living is for you, if you'reready to take a transnational journey that will
coop you to live on purpose andyou will learn proven strategies that eight key
areas to increase your personal awareness,Identify and overcome limiting beliefs, prioritize and
(44:44):
maximize your time, exchange your strugglesfor purpose, get clear on your gifts
and strengths, be confident in whoGod created you to be and to live
intentionally. Wow that every woman excitedto offer this, I really am.
So. Then if you're interested inthe group coaching, The next masterclass begins
(45:06):
Tuesday, September twelve. Included ourvideo replays, materials, a private Facebook
group community, and two free bonusesto further support you and living intentionally.
You can find all this information outon our website at Flourish Christiancoach dot com
so Flourish Christiancoach dot com. IfFreedom of Flourish sticks in your head,
(45:29):
you can also find up at Freedomof Flourish Life Coaching dot com. You
can email me at Jen at FlourishChristiancoach dot com, and you can also
follow us on Facebook, Interest andInstagram. Wow. That is I know,
just knowing you and as I've gottento know you better over the months,
Jen is truly a great coach becauseshe asks really good, deep questions
(45:54):
that provoke a thought process. Atis this wonderful journey mapping out in your
life? I just think that you'reonto something we so need. We so
need this in the world. Weneed more Jesus in our world and in
(46:14):
our lives. It's right there forthe taking. And you've really put this
into a fantastic program. Thank you. I'm sorry, Go ahead, No,
it just has a process to walkforward, to go forward. Yeah,
Here's what I know, Marine,is that change, growth, progress
(46:35):
and success happen by choice, notby chance. When you combine the right
information with precise implementation and Holy Spiritinspiration, you experience lasting transformation because change
happens from the inside out, andto me, that requires the Holy Spirit.
So we follow a proven success pathwith a christ and our focus built
(46:59):
on timeless principles while incorporating powerful toolsso that you can achieve outstanding results and
maximize your God given potential. Sowe've coached hundreds of women to flourish as
free, confident women of God,leaving their insecurities and doubts behind. So
if you're listening, now's the timefor you to flourish in empowered freedom,
(47:21):
with clarity, confidence and purpose inyour life. Beautiful, oh my gosh,
my friend, thank you so much, absolutely fantastic. This will all
be in the show description and thereyou go. You will also be yes,
you'll definitely be able to find iton all the show description. So
(47:42):
as we say goodbye, I justagain thank you so much, And to
our listeners, if you can takea moment, close your eyes, put
your hands on your heart, andtake a deep breath and exhale and now
that you're not alone here on thefamily balance again, and thank you so
(48:04):
much to turn h
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