The Lapsed Fan: The Unwrappening 2025 Day 4

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This episode of The Lapsed Fan. This Unwrappening twenty twenty
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(02:16):
Let him know the co chairman sent you. This holiday season, it's.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
The Lapsed Fan Wrestling Podcast with Jack mcarna, s e
O and JP Sorrow.

Speaker 1 (02:32):
We've got an exciting Christmas program lined up. Produce folks.
We've been a little boys this year. Every game it's
an artificial tree. So I did artificial job at Timmy
kindness is on your excesion player inability to adjust all
over ther Raindeer the Lapsed Fan for the Dollar Man,

(02:56):
send it claus In say it's not so, and we're
back to the TLF Christmas Show. I'm wrapping in part four.
We're coming off a gift that we're not going to
soon forget for all the wrong reasons. I should send it.
We should send it back to them. Frank Zille's fucking

(03:18):
return to Sender taking the creepiest face in the history
of television on Twin Peaks. They put it on a
massive blanket. I mean, this blanket has got to be
one of the biggest blankets, one of the biggest graphic
blankets I've ever seen that. I mean, I mean, also,
do you know which it's not just even the image
of it, it's the fact that it is. It's a
surgically owned close up of it, you know, like it's

(03:41):
not even like the whole shot from the from the scene.
It's like just a giant square of his fucking face. Well,
let's see if we can lower the temperature here. What's next?
I don't know, we got there, Oh, Christian Hollist, Eh,
this is going to be a face from a Stephen
King's movie. It's gonna be a face from a Stephen

(04:04):
King movie or something. You gotta do this, Okay, it's
got things in it. It's like it's good. Oh wow,
there's like a board game or something or toys. Man, Christian,
what a long time roth solid listener. Man. This is
He's the kind of person you when you start to
make a podcast, this kind of person you picture digging it.

(04:25):
He's been with us so long and it's been such
a pleasure to you know, we always talked about, Remember
we always talked about in college. We talked about the
we just want that one person who's who's goes on
the roof and just shouts for us, like, that's Christian Hollister,
He's at exactly, he's that person. What do you send us?
Where do we going? Oh? Do you remember this? I

(04:46):
remember this? No? This is that is I mean that's
something they would have made in the Attitude era, but
that is clearly not Attitude era, right, it came out
in the Attitude era, but it has the the classic
Well and Brett and logo sid you know, like these
are wow that what would you call this? The beveled

(05:08):
kind of logo would you call? Yeah, well it's the
metallic the metallic that the metallic logo, the one that
what's his butt? Designed? Friend Brian Henry yes to him
as well, But how many eight hundred, eight hundred trivia
questions we're going to do? One? I this is like
Jack's Season one to wait till you do that? Okay,

(05:32):
let's do that. I do remember this being like this
came out around the same time as like the first
Jack's Ring and like the Survivor series four pack with
a green Olpnate Warrior. Yes, it was part of that,
like well, let's actually try to do merchandise again after
the doldrums of the fucking ninety five era. I went
all in. I remember, you know. I mean not that
I've not talked about it all the time, but just

(05:54):
I was so excited they were selling toys again that
I could actually use. I was so into the jack
just just to have something, just to be able to
have something and to be able to collect again. Doubt. Yeah,
I remember that Christmas because I had I had all
these more memories, as I've talked about a million times
over the years on the show of getting all those
has Bros. That one Christmas, and it just died. There

(06:17):
was no restling toys to ask for anymore. For the
longest time, it felt like, and then all of a sudden,
these jacks came out and it was like here with
that blanket. But thing's gotta go away, trash or something.
It's gonna be like locked up in a safe. We'll
talk about it. I don't care. I'm not that's not
sleeping anywhere near around me. I don't shoot myself. I

(06:37):
forgot about all this stuff. Man, look at this. It's
like a board game too. I've got a rock. You
might via trading card. The Wow, look at that. I
don't know what this that's gonna be. I must be
part of the game. Maybe, Uh. I wonder if that's uh,
if you get if that's worth anything? Now, I bet
it would be worth something if he was nominate for
an Oscar. It's tough. Probably won't be. It's a tough shot. Sorry,

(07:00):
that's gonna be. That's gonna be. I'll tell you what that.
I can tell you right now. I probably will never
get a meeting with seven but productions, it's fine, all right,
He's fine. Brian's a big fan. Yeah, Brian, listen, listen. Yeah,
but my time, I'm gonna spend Raggon on this, not Ragon. No,
We're just look if he I'm being honest about it.
In my opinion, I listen, if he gets it, if

(07:20):
he gets a nomination, congratulations, all for It'll be all
for it. We'll be happier for him than anybody. I'll
shoot myself in the head, but I'm congratulation. As a
nineteen ninety five Survivor series, who is Bredheart's opponent, gold
Dust Undertaker or Diesel? That's so fucking stupid, my mom,
Dezel incorrect at the nineteen ninety Summer Slam Repo Man's
opponent Model Virgil or Crush Crush correct? The tag team

(07:43):
involved in the Final Survivals that up? You don't look
to make sure I was right? No, sad, not really
all right? The tag team. I did look, but I
was just I was more interested to see, like if
they got it wrong. This one, I don't. Yeah, I
do know this one. The tag team involved in the
final Survivors match the nineteen ninety Survivor series was what
I got, multiple choice, But I'm going to give that

(08:05):
to you. Wa wait, so ninety ninety five series, the
participants the tag there's one tag team involved, follow the Divisionaries,
the Visionaries. Yes, for the Visionaries. Wait, wait, you mean
like a tag team or do you mean like a
Survivor Series tag team. The tag team involved in the
final Survivors match of the nineteen ninety Survivor series was
I don't understand the question demolition, Power and glory or bushwhackers. Oh,

(08:25):
power and glory. There you go. That's the stupid I mean,
because that doesn't make any sense. For the Survivor series
is a tag match? Yeah, but only one tag team
made it to the Surviviatori's final fine intact. I guess
the co captains for the tag team elimination match of
the nineteen eighty eight Survivors series were Wait for which
one the co captains for the tag team elimination elimination Uh,

(08:49):
Demolition powers Pain. I wouldn't have known that the theme
for WrestleMania seven was Stars and Straps Forever unbelievable I'm doing.
That's exactly. It's such a game because I remember you
never remember about this game. I remember being like, Wow,
there's a lot of questions in here about a period
to time period that we're not supposed to talk about, right,

(09:09):
you know, like just those alone, right, they would never
talk about Hogan and like that whole era. But this
game did. What was the name of the Blue Brothers manager,
the Blue Uncle Saya's good Ninetay seven surviverceriies one team
was Bulldog's Young Stallions, Strike Force Bees. And it's like
those strikes RELI in the least strike Force. We'll do

(09:31):
something about that, right, So he said, strike Force Bees,
Bulldogs Stallions and wait, Bulldog Stallions, Bees and strike Force.
There's one more. There's one more, stump the boss. We're

(09:53):
playing stump the Boss. I think this could be a
recurring series. Christian. I'm gonna go on a limb because
I know they had a brief period as a Babyface team. Oh,
I got it right. We're gonna keep going to you
get it wrong, I get it, yes, yes, Wow. At
the nineteen ninety one Riversaries who eliminated Skinner from competition?

(10:14):
Oh that's a tough one. Holy shit, your choices you Matador,
Barbarian or Slaughter. I have to look at it, and
we have stumped the boss. It was Sergeant Slaughter eliminated
Skinner from competition. Well, they could eliminate Skinner entirely for
my Hashbro competition. What's the name of his book, Booze whatever?

(10:36):
You should be called? Boot Steve kerran Chronicles Chronicles Part
one and two, The Stomach Turn. Well we got more
here from Christian. Wow, look at this one. Hey about
complete hul Cogan? What do we got? Oh that's a beauty.
Look at that. That's a gorgeous thing. WWF Magazine, April

(10:57):
eighty eight. Hogan on the cover with the red and
yellow headband, not the bandana headline. Hogan's title stolen a
Vengeful Giant takes the belt with a little help from
his friends. Wrestling Maya four. Inside details, Hulax plans Ultimate Warrior,
Hercules plans for his destruction. Matilda can she get her
teeth into a six man brawl? Henan protests in this issue,

(11:21):
elizabeths e protests, Yeah, that's funny, even protests. I like that.
Shout outs to Big fun in Columbus, Ohio, which apparently
is look place he got his hands on this wonderful
Are you ready for? Uh? What's that? Twelve nineteen ninety one,
Actually it's truly twenty four, nineteen ninety one. WCW Official

(11:41):
Trading Cards. Oh, I had a million of these. This
was the first box of cards I ever got in
my life, not just a pack, like a whole box
of boss. And how I ended up getting it It must
have been easy cut rate and a family friend bought
it for me. So I had these cards all over
my house. I still use them as bookmarks. That seems
like a lot. Absolutely, that's crazy. You can't open them? Sure,

(12:08):
is there a stick of gum in here? I would
I would actually chew it if it was in there.
I would remember. I used to feel like the sand
on the cards because there was gum in there, and
then like how awfully crunchy that ship so old? Come
apart in pieces, it's like, and then you have to
chew it so much to get it to be a
piece of gum. The fact that I put that in
my mouth as a kid, and like parents didn't say anything. Well,
and the fact that you're still alive, right, I know

(12:29):
that's like if you offered that today, I'm telling you,
zero kids. No, not today's society. You're trying to kill
me here, this one's for you, boss. Take a look.
What do you say? What do I see a lot?
I see a peanut butter and jam sandwich, is what
I say. M Garvin fabulous. I mean he just he

(12:52):
looks hungover and like, but he thinks he's hot and sexy.
Sounds like the free Birds to me, what a fucking
every last one of them. His middle name is Jam,
as in what you do when you're the greatest rock
and roll band on Earth, or what he eats every
night before going to bed eats Jam. What a child?

(13:16):
Jeff real milk with that just ticks a spoon and
Winnie the Pooh, What the fuck. Some weren't buying it.
So the Freebirds bought space in Wrestling Wrap Up Volume two,
number eight, page fifteen to set the record straight. Their
number one smash hit is when Love comes to Town.
A fucking bunch of bullshit Brother Love, Brother, What I'll

(13:39):
take that one? Think that one keeps a pack attack?
What do you have? The first one I have is
Lex Luger who looks like, honestly, he looks like he's
shitting out Rick Flair. We have two different Rick Flair
used to do in a leap frog, and then I
got one of Le's bear Hugging Rick.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
Podcast with Jack m JP Sorrow the Lapsed Fan Wrestling Podcast.

Speaker 1 (14:14):
Lex Luger ak the Total Package, is a four time
ww US champion and one of the most explosive men
in the ring, especially right there he's exploding Ric Flair
out of his ass. His master tree in the ring
has earned the respect of all opponents, including the nature
boy Rick Flair, seen here getting ready to dine on
some ring rope. What a stupid writer that writers don't

(14:36):
they need? They need Vince mc man behind the sounds
like they may have had him to JRR. Well, I
get a j R. That's Lex luger. Look, how is
that your Moross car? He's like barely in it. Ross
is barely hold the mic I got, I got a
fucking deer in headlights headshot of JR. Oh god, that

(14:57):
that looks like what would be on his like CNN center,
I now right exactly put that on a lanyard home
the state of Oklahoma. I could say that again in
what state is Oklahoma? Is what I'm asking? Favorite holding?
His favorite hold is, oh god, I don't know, uh,

(15:20):
the microphone? That was the barbecue sauce sauce it Ross brings.
Ross brings a steady stream of danger to the arena,
disgusting stream of sauce to the arena. As one of

(15:41):
wrestling's most prolific commentators, He's a native of Oklahoma, and
as the license plate says, he's okay. If it wasn't
for his contribution to the sports, wrestling would definitely be
at a loss for words or at a ross for words.
If you ask me at a ross for words, that

(16:01):
that would be a the documentary maybe I titled that
the documentary words? How is this the fabulous free Birds? Okay?
This is literally fat ass Rickey Morton headlock and head
is totally cut off. I also got it. I've got
a shot from the same match. But he just looks.

(16:23):
They look miserable, fucking miserable. They don't want to wrestle anymore,
not at all. Here's Tom Zank about to apply deodorant.
He's got his arm bit fully exposed. I also got
a z Man one, what if the fun But I
got more like a real one that looks like z Man.

(16:43):
Oh yeah, that's a good one. And this is flair
hip tossing Luger in the same match. You just showed
the lupra again. Z Man is not your average wrestler,
he says, quote, he says quote. I'm starting at the bottom,
say that again, working my way to the top. I
don't care who who has the belts Luker Flare, I
don't care who it is. I'm here to make a

(17:05):
name for myself. What do WCW fans that are the
Jim hurd Era and z Man have in common? But
they both didn't care who held the ww belt? His model?
What his model? What's what's his model? U? Z Man
in ninety one? Stay single, that's the fucking road, low

(17:28):
low inside single. HOLDO, let me Okay, let me ask
you this. If you got this card, who would you
say this is of uh No, no, Terry Taylor. Yeah,
all right, Terry Taylor. H you wouldn't fucking know that, really,
because he's like, you can't even see his face. It's

(17:49):
a profile shot of him holding an Armbarn Arn Anderson.
Shouldn't the subject of the card be center on the image?
Shouldn't you? Shouldn't hair not be on their face?

Speaker 2 (17:57):
Like?

Speaker 1 (17:57):
Should they actually be seeing stuff? I will say, though, Christian,
these these soft spot in my heart. Man, I could
look at these all day. I had all these when
Terry Taylor. When Terry Taylor enters the ring, you can
barely hear yourself talk for all the cheers put a
bunch of bullshit. He is truly a favorite among wrestling
fans from coast to coast. As for his opponents, it's

(18:19):
usually their time for getting a tailor made suit of pain?
What the fuck a tailor made suit of pain?

Speaker 2 (18:32):
Is?

Speaker 1 (18:32):
That? Is that the bread dress that Lady Gaga war
to the VMA's the suit of pain? Taylor made suit
of shame and pain? This should be And I believe
Kevin Salivan wore the uh the suit of New Bane.
Oh we got, we got well also from Christian, from Christian,

(18:55):
My god, here we go old school, old school. Wow. Wow,
really legit, what are you holding? I'm holding a original
Hull Cogan has Bro the Gorilla Press slam one sure,
apparently signed by Terry by Terry, says hulkster on it
written like in a thing, and I mean the price

(19:17):
tag says let me see here, signed by Hull Cogan
Twicks the complete Hulko Complete we signed I just I mean, yeah,
that looks like his handwriting. Yeah he does it. Yeah
with the h Wow, that's pretty cool. That's wild. In
the season of the complete. Indeed, just when you thought
you had enough, Hull Cogan has Bros. Right, I mean,

(19:41):
how many of the how many of this particular Hull
Cogan have we received over the years? The original hul
Cogan Guerilla Press with that one I know sign that's wild.
I do. I do like picturing members of the Solar
System going into their local you know, retro hobby shop
and shopping for the co chair. Yes, I do too.
It's the beautiful thing. Electrician. Thanks. We're going to be

(20:01):
thumbing through these w W Trading parts for quite a
while to come. I feel like we get those every year,
and every year I'm like, yes, they're they're just they
they never cease to uh hit in the sweet spot.
They're just great. So the writing is so stupid, So
let's shuffle them up and we'll see you for the
next installment of the Unwrappening. There is a production of

(20:24):
the Labs Entertainment Group. It's content is intended for private
use only. Feel so sorry, we want