Rats, Lice and Chinatown - The Lone Ranger (12-01-43)

Original Air Date: December 01, 1943
Host: Andrew Rhynes
Show: The Lone Ranger
Phone: (707) 98 OTRDW (6-8739)

Stars:
• Brace Beemer (Lone Ranger)
• John Todd (Tonto)
Writer:
• Fran Striker
Producer:
• George W. Trendle
Music:
• Ben Bonnell

Exit music from: Roundup on the Prairie by Aaron Kenny https://bit.ly/3kTj0kK

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
M h. Welcome to the OldTime Radio Westerns. I'm your host Andrew
Ryns and let's get into this episode. This episode is gonna be the Lone
Ranger. Original dates December first,nineteen forty three and the title is rats

(00:24):
Lice in Chinatown. Let's get intoit and I hope you enjoy. I
am Suber, a fiery horse witha speed of light, a cloud of

(00:50):
dust, and a honey I ownsilver. A Lone Rangers has happen.

(02:28):
In the years following the gold Rush, many men in California rose to fabulous
heights of wealth and power. Oneof these was Arnold Gerson, whose wealth
reached out to develop the vast resourcesof the far West. Unlike the thousands
of gold seekers, adventurers, andparasites who sought to grab only what they
could hold in their hands, ArnoldGearson was in the Far West to stay.

(02:50):
Gerson saw the growing influx of disreputableelement and knew that they could and
would destroy what he and others likehim had wrested from this land of promise.
It is sided to strike at theheart the infamous Barbary Coast in an
effort to stamp out the viciousness Gearsonsought for and found the lone Ranger.
This masked rider of mystery, thoughreluctant to leave the plains and mountains of

(03:12):
the Cattle Country, answered the calland soon found himself fighting a new type
of criminal in the Barbary Coast.Returned with us now to those swelling days
of yesteryear. From out of thepast come the thundering hoofbeats of the great
horse Silver, A lone ranger ridesagain. The most vicious and deadly enemy

(03:46):
ever to invade the United States landedan army at San Francisco just before the
turn of the century. It wasan army with greater striking power and more
destructiveness than all the military campaigns ofhistory, Well organized in a highly efficient
legion of death, its battle chargersand soldiers numbered millions. In reality,
the battle chargers were rats, thesoldiers fleas, and they're poison. A

(04:12):
disease that has killed more men thanall the war since time began mobodic plague.
It had its beginning on the waterfrontsof Yokohama, Bombay, Batavia,
Singapore, and a hundred different portsof call for ships that were sailing west,
and at each port, the soundof the embarking army was always the

(04:34):
same. The swift scuttling feet ofsmall curved claws, slinking along dock sides,
under wharves and clambing mooring hawsers,thousands upon thousands of beady black eyes
peering intently through the darkness of aship's hold. This was the army of
invasion. But San Francisco and Chinatownknew nothing about it. And in the

(04:57):
back room of a Barbary coast cafecalled Little Seen, all seen anything in
Mac Barber around here? Mac Barber? Or how would I see him?
He shift out for the Orient oversix months ago, and he's shipping back
out of dock and the flood tideeither tonight or sometime tomorrow. You ever
hear of Kuan Ku Kuan Kung listenbart. All the Chinese names sound the

(05:19):
same to me, And just likethe Chinaman that wear them, they're all
alike. Juan Koung is no chinaman. She's a Chinese goddess, the goddess
of mercy. That's the idea.Now tomorrow night, there's going to be
a big to do up in theChinatown. They call it the Feast of
the lanterns. All the Chinese dressup in fancy clothes of masks and have
a parade. I didn't get it. They carry it out of their idols.

(05:40):
They call them gods and goddesses inthe parade. Most of them are
pretty fancy stuff made out of gold, pure gold. Kuan Kung is a
most valuable I see you rush theparade, grab that gold midel, and
then have the lawn our trail infive minutes. The way I've got it
figured is to get the Goddess ofMercy before she joined a parade. How
As an old goat takes care ofit. He lives on DuPont Street.

(06:04):
His name is Tyshar Schoon. Youmean I ain't got it all worked out
yet. At the minute Mac comesashore, we'll move in the fox sole
of a clipper ship approaching the GoldenGate, a sleepless sailor costing his narrow

(06:26):
bunk. Hey, what's wrong withyou up there? Settle down to go
to sleep. That's you, Mac. Who else do you think it'd be
in the bunk below your Queen andShiva? I can't sleep. The noise
keeps me awake. You're dead?What noise? I don't know what it
is. All you have to dois keep quiet for a second and you'll

(06:48):
hear it. Listen, heart,sure I hear it. Do you mean
to say that's what's keeping you awake? Why, dumb swab? There's nothing
but rats common Bill's rat. I'vebeen sailing for two years and I've never
heard rats make that much noise before. Listen, kid, I've been sailing

(07:09):
in the Seven Seas for over twentyyears. Rats running through the bulkheads is
a real sailor's lullah bah. You'lllearn to love it. I don't think
I'll ever No, that's wrong.I don't know something bit me must have
been a mosquito. Mosquito, you'refinding mosquitoes on the Pacific Ocean. That's
a flea, kid, You gota lot to learn. They ever been

(07:32):
in Crisco before? No, Whenwe doc tomorrow, I'll show you around.
A friend of mine owns a cafedown on Barbary Coast. It's called
the Little Casino who drop in theirfirst nav a drinking While in the library

(07:56):
of Arnold Giessen's home on knob Hill, the lone ranger was the banker.
Goodbye, when are you leaving?Tonight. No, not until day after
tomorrow. I don't I have asocial obligation fulfilled before we leave San Francisco.
Social obligation. I thought you shiedaway from that type of thing.
Hell, ordinarily I do. TayShar Shong has invited us to attend the
Feast of the Landings in Chinatown tomorrownight. Joy Shar Schung. Who's he?

(08:22):
One of the finest men I've everknown? That's soon. I don't
know much about the Chinese here inthe city, never cared much for foreigners.
Tashur Shung isn't a foreigner. He'san honest, upright, law abiding
Chinese American, a naturalized citizen,just as American as we are. Well,
maybe so personally. I agree withROGERD. Kipling. You know east

(08:45):
is east and west is west.You want to meet Thy Shar Schung.
His philosophy is better than mister Kipling'spoetry. Oh if there's nothing more.
Oh wait, I just remembered something. A friend of mine, doctor who
just moved here from East to behere any minute. I'll consider it a
great favor if you will wait andmeet him, will you very well?
His name is Thatcher George stacher.I think you two have a lot in

(09:09):
common. Is that? So hefeels the same way about germs, disease
germs as you do about crooks.He can't rest till he's run them down.
I'd been glad to meet doctor thatchi At flood tide. Late the

(09:35):
following afternoon, several schooners, ricatines, and clipper ships rode through the Golden
Gate, and a short time laterthey were tied up with a long pier
that jutted out into San Francisco Bay. Sailors, eager for the strange feel
of dry land beneath their feet,swarmed down A dozen gang planes. Come
on, kids, sling that doublebake crusgers older and let's go. I
don't feel very good. I can'tseem to tie this thing, so it'll

(09:58):
stay here. Let me see youit. Huh? I wonder you can't
tie up your duffel. You're usingthe granny knot? Whoever heard of a
sailor using a granny on a duffel? Bay? You need a dirk's head.
Give me that line. Now watchthis. They're all tight and ship
shape. There ain't nobody this sideof the China Sea that you can tie
a turk's head like I can.Yeah, what's the matter, kid?

(10:22):
You're kind of pay her on discover. He told you that I didn't feel
good. All you need is adrink. Come on, we're heading for
the little casino. Mac. Look, don't get hot at Hawser line.
Maybe it's because it's getting dark,but it looks to me like that Haws
is moving. See say you doneed a drink. That Hawser ain't moving.

(10:43):
It's just a few of them buildrats climbing down. They want to
get ashore too. Come on.That's the way the enemy's army landed.
There was no thundering salvo of offshorecannon, no blazing muskets nor flying lead,

(11:07):
only the deathly scurrying sound of thousandsof dirty claws and disease and festive
bodies. The invasion had begun.Hey, bar keep, we want to

(11:28):
drink. Stop yelling. I can'tMac party so you know my name.
Let's stop you from serving a drink. Oh oh, but the boss told
me to look out for you.Want to see you? Yeah, who's
the boss? Start critic critic?Hey all right, Mac, I don't
think I want to drink, Sureyou do, just the thing Hey,

(11:50):
kid, what's the matter. Whatare you staggering for? We had anything
yet? My head spinning? Howdo you like that? My shipmate just
looks at the bottle of liquor.I never touched that. I was watching
him. He and drunk. He'ssick. He can't get a doctor to

(12:11):
come down here to the coast,except maybe that new saw Bones had just
moved into town. Who's he?Hello? Name Thatcher? Send him?
Send, send somebody for him.Help me carry the kid back into Bart's
office. See what I mean?Make another law here in town knows you.

(12:35):
It's an easy job anyway. Fixyourself up in some kind of a
fancy rig and go to this TaishaShung's house up on DuPont Street. I
must go, Liser in this heathenidol. I've seen it, and I'll
give you as it. It's worthat least ten thousand dollars. Yeah,
how I carry that? That's notvery big. You could pack it in
your duffel bag. All right inhere, doc, where's that's him laying

(12:56):
on the bench over there? Hi, Doc, better run o Mac and
get back here as soon as youcan. Yeah, let me know what
the Sawbone says about the kid.How does he look back? I guess,
like most sailors, he could standdry land. He'll be losing his
color with a feudid glands in hisnick. I think I gotta make some

(13:20):
a good stiff drink back a supposedto sailor. How long he's been in
town? Now? I guess what'sthe difference, Quite a bit. He'll
be dead instead of thirty minutes dead. What's wrong? The worst thing that
could happen to him and to SanFranciscoom, I don't understand. It's plague,
your bunnit plague. Everything is inreadiness, my floy I have a

(13:56):
read the goddess concom in all hercelestial splend She is most u specious and
inspiring. Now we'll await the bearswho will carry her in a position.
I had hoped the man with themask and his Indian fan would be here
before this time. We will arrivenever fear. Perhaps that is I will
open the door. Oh yes,it is all right, China girl.

(14:20):
Put up your hands and don't squawk. What is the meaning of this?
Yes, the gundfather, you doyou old goat reach. I shall not
allow armed robber. Maybe you'll allowthis story, or Joe, you'll get
the same thing. Oh, where'sthat Chinese idol I've heard so much about.

(14:45):
The curtain falls on the first actof our Lone Ranger story. Before
the next exciting scenes, please Promitusto pause for just a few moments.

(15:09):
Unaware of what had happened to theirfriends, the Lone Ranger and Totto reined
up their horses and the deep shadowsback of tash our Shuns home. Evidently
the parade has already started. Tottosaid, we'll leave the horses here.

(15:30):
Why ain't Chinese people do this?Man one of their important holidays, the
Feast of the Lanterns. We're honoredby being invited. Come on, we'll
knock at the side door of tashour Shuns house. That's strange. Sure

(15:54):
they're expecting us. The door isnot locked. We're going in. There's
no lights, and I think Ishall shown. I shall show them.
Maybe then go watch great on mainStreet. No share shown with waite for

(16:17):
us, and that I don't likethis tunnel. I s look in the
next room. Listen you here likea light tunnel quick fine land Yeah,
yeah, we see now tay shShum and his daughter both bound and gag.
I'll help him off. Lay youentire father, tone, thank Heaven.

(16:45):
I shall be forever grateful. Areyou all right? Edge withstand all
things? But you, my child, I am no importance the gods Kuan
Kun, she's been stolen. Whathappened? We had prepared the celestial image
of the goddess. It was tobe carried in the ceremonial position a few
moments ago, and our men enteredthe front door because he struck my father,

(17:07):
then me after he had bound,and he stole the image of quang
Kuna. Who was this man?What did he look like? You were
a math? I thought at firstit was you and this image he stall.
The likeness of Quankou was fashion inpure gold. Tearls and precious stones
were part of her head dress.Evidently the robbery was well planned. If

(17:30):
you didn't recognize a man, there'sno way for us to wait a minute.
Halloh, look at the rope thatwas used to bind and tashur shan.
Is it not in the same waythis one is? Ah that plenty
strange. We never see nothing likethis afore neither have I I know one
thing? What do you mean?These are seamens? Nuts? Only a

(17:53):
sailor could tie them. That narrowsthe field considerably. But there are thousand
and sea money in San Francisco.Her job is to find just one of
them, a guilty one. SurelyHeaven and the Guardess Cuancun will bless you.
For boy, the excitement has beentoo much for I will call a

(18:17):
physician at once. Good, well, my friend, and I will return
later. Come on. My gratitudeis boundless, and may Heaven guide your
search. Man. I've got it, Bart, you got it right here

(18:40):
in my duffle bay. Yeah good? How is he? He's dead?
Well, I'll be dead because youbrought it in here. The doc says,
there's no telling how fin it'll spreadbetter. What are you gaut?
Plague? Black plague kills your quick. I can't see it. Get out
of here. You don't leave,so help me. I'll plow your head

(19:02):
off. Plague. Maybe I've gotit too. It feels kind of funny.
Well where I go, I gotno. I don't care where you
go. It's every man for himselfnow, all right, But I'm taking
this gadget along with me. Ifyou're gonna have it, Maybe he don't
hunt up that sawbones what's his name? Thatcher? Doct thatcher. I won't

(19:22):
tell you any good. Maybe bothof us are wrong. Part we reached
for a Chinese idol who got theplague instead. With the lightning swiftness of
an unseen forest fire, the invadingarmy of rats moved through Barbary Coast in
Chinatown. In its wake came death, desolation, and a single word that
brought fear to every human heart.Plague. Doctor. Here is the crisis,

(19:52):
and just beast, you'll become him. Thank heaving gods have heard my
peers. That's good news. Iwish you were true in every other case
in Chinatown. Yes, the way, we're losing more times than we win.
What else can be done? Isthere any way Tunnel and I can
help. I don't know how.I'm sure you could do it if there
was a way. Hundred Gearson hastold me many instances of the occasion brave

(20:15):
in. Unfortunately, this enemy canbe seen. The news that we ever
come to him is through sound.Sound What do you mean, doctor,
I'll show you. This house isno different than a hundred others in Chinatown
and Barbary Coast during the past tendays. They've all become infested and overrun
with rats. Listen when I panton this wall. Yeah, in my

(20:48):
home. They're everywhere. Wherever there'sa rat, there are fleas. That's
the beginning of bubonic plague. Orwhere did they come from? I don't
know. From the front and recentlydog ships. And they won't stop here.
I'm moving to all parts of thecity. Of course, he's bad
enough for our little settlement to sufferthis scurge. If it could only be

(21:11):
stopped so that other innocent people wouldntWill money help? Arnold Gerson will do
everything possible. Money would bring moredoctors, but they couldn't get here from
the Eastern time to stop the epidemic. Give no good, can't fight the
plague. The man walked into myoffice just three days ago and off and
be a whole bag off to savehis life. He was dead within a

(21:32):
lah. Do you still have thegoal? I really don't know. It's
in the canvas sack that's tied sosecurely. I haven't many blue day.
I can't don't tear the odd lookingnuts. Well, that shouldn't be hard
unless they wait a minute. What'sthe matter. Look, here's a short
piece of rope, but I cutfrom some used by a thief to tie
up Taishar Shull almost two weeks ago. The nuts on the canvas sack like

(21:56):
these, Well, yes, they'reexactly like that. How did you do
the contents of that canvas bag belongsto Tishar Shun. The ceremonial image made
a pure goal? You mean thegoddess Quanko. I'm sure of it.
I don't. I have searched allover the coast for a man who could
tie a knot like this. Wenever found him. Evidently you did,
Doctor Thatcher. It's a strange coincidence. If the likeness of Quan Kong has

(22:19):
been found, I am sure itis a good Omen. I must tell
I wish he's good Omen that therats were going today. That's the only
thing to save is I guess it'stoo whistle hoop? Maybe not, doctor,
What do you mean something? I'vejust thought of a plan that may

(22:41):
or may not work. I'll needArnold Gerson's help. I'll send Toto with
a message tonight. Soto, Well, I didn't expect to see you me
bring important note from Lone Ranger.You read it, of course? Let

(23:03):
me see it, all right?Cheer you tell the lone Ranger, I'll
try to do what he suggests.I'll go to the city council. I
may not be successful, but I'lltry. Let me tell him. I

(23:26):
ask city council Tato. They wouldn'tlisten to me. They refused to grant
the lone Ranger permission to help inthis emergency. A lone ranger say,
if you get answered like that,me ask other questions. What is it
him need three hundred cans of blastingpowder? You happen in the warehouse now
waiting for shipment to mind three hundredcans of blasting But what in the world

(23:48):
does he want? That lone Ranger, say, mister Gerson him plenty smart
him think len him no, myes, I think I understand. The
Scheme's fantastic. It can't possibly wherewe get lasting powder in my large warehouse
near the waterfront. I'll tell thewatchman to let you in. Ah Meko,

(24:11):
Now, mord night, about teno'clock you meet Chinese menchong at your
Chinatown. Does the lone Ranger wantme to do that too? All right,
I'll be there the following day underthe direction of the wise and worthy

(24:32):
Tai shar Shung. Hundreds of familieswere removed from a large central section of
Chinatown, and curious people noticed thatmany Chinese workmen, led by an American
Indian, carried countless metal cans intothe evacuated area. That evening, a
few minutes before ten o'clock, threemen and a young girl met by appointment
at the edge of town. Youthink, mister Gilson, I don't know

(24:52):
if that chair. It's a dangerousjob, mighty dangerous. How's he going
to do with you? Well,I don't know exactly, but Ton who
has planted the cans of blasting powderand concentric circles and buried in underground all
throughout the area, how can itbe? I netted? Well, that's
the catch, but no longer fuses. All I can do is start in
the center and light each successive blast. As they come out fast enough to

(25:15):
escape being killed. Well maybe theycan on horseback. It is my humble
opinion that anything the mask One attemptshe accomplishes, he will do that.
I know he will. This isas good a time as any for me
to offer an apology. Apology forwhat's my thing? The lone ranger told
me. I ought to meet you, and as usual he was right.

(25:37):
You and your people are willing tosacrifice your homes and your property to stop
the progress of a horrible disease,and incidentally, to save the rest of
the city. It is written thatany sacrifice for the sake of humanity is
a duty to oneself. All Ican say is I am proud to be
a part of the same America you'vechosen to be your adopted home. My

(26:00):
humble privilege to call you twin.And if the lone Ranger's idea works,
I'll rebuild every homelet's destroyed. Gratitudeof my people shall be yours forever most
ten o'clock. I hope there itgoes. That's the first one. It's

(26:37):
all over. Come on, let'sget down there. But it's scared most
of the people in town of theirsenses. Better to be frightened than ill
with deeply disease. It's worth timesit has Look there isn't a house standing
for over ten square blocks. You'regoing to have a lot explaining you through
the city. Counsimist gist in yourreport on the plague will be the best
explanation. See this one wall isall the left of our home. Who

(27:00):
will build another? My child's justone wall. I would listen ze let
you no longer. Then it's gonedead, and so is the threat of
your bonic plague. Thanks to theLong Ranger, the story you have just

(28:41):
heard is a copyrighted feature of TheLone Ranger Incorporated. This has been an

(29:03):
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(29:26):
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