February 14, 2025 • 21 mins
How old will be the children be when we start to let go.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, y'all, thank you very much for listening to the
Neighbors podcast. Yes, yes, yes, and we are going to
set the kids free. Hold on for a set. Let's
talk about it, Danny The Neighbors Podcast with recent Mike.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
They discausing different issues that affect that treating like that.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
It's the Neighbors way, the neighbors.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
Yeah on today, dropping today. How everybody doing.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
So, y'all we're talking about setting the kids free. You
might be wondering what in the world are we talking about? So,
how many of you are holding on to your kids
very tightly? I mean very tightly, very tightly. Are you
allowing them to grow? Are you allowing them to see
(00:55):
the world? Okay, I'm not I'm not letting the mango.
And I'm gonna tell you all the reason why. My
I'm struggling with it a little bit because I see
where the world is going.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
You know, sometimes you kind of want to hold on
a little a little more, a little more right. But
it's not fair though, you know. So my my kids
went to school relatively close to home, you know, when
they went to college. My daughter who now has she
(01:32):
was employed before, but now she has technically a full
time job. You know, it was full time before, but
you know, full time being eight hours a day, right,
but now she's working for.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
City government.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh okay, you know, and she's really been enjoying it
the last two weeks. But come to find out that
she has to move.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Oh yeah, within a year.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
A year, so so she will be moving and probably
about we're we're looking because it's you know, we're looking
within the next eight months, okay, yeah, and we're looking
at eight months because I really want her to have
(02:18):
the her housing completed before the holidays, for the holidays, you.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Know what I mean, but before the fall.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
You know, I really want her in there before Thanksgiving
most definitely before Christmas, gotcha, But I really want her
in there before Thanksgiving, you know. So it's going to
take a lot for me to just let go, right, right,
especially with everything that's going on in the world.
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Yeah, yeah, you know I've been that, done that right
right though my daughter she's eight and nine hundred miles away.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
Yeah, and uh, it's hard to cut that in local cord,
very hard.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
But you know, you you women it easy, I mean
not easy.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
But but what what has it been or what did
you do to allow that to really happen.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
I just let it.
Speaker 5 (03:08):
I mean I had to sit down and face reality
that she's away in college and you I can't.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
How can I put this?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
I just I can't keep holding on boo hooing boo,
especially when it's benefiting her right right. You know, quite
a few other friends of mine told me, you know,
but you go away to college, you know, you you
can go through it. You're gonna be boohoo and boom,
You're gonna go through it. You're gonna go through it,
right and you know, and after that, you know, that
(03:41):
first year I was like, oh man, you know, boom boom.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Then she came back.
Speaker 5 (03:44):
Oh cool. But then the second year it started getting better. Okay,
third year.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
When the hell you going?
Speaker 5 (03:57):
And I'm like, goodness, I mean, yeah, it's it's it's
a it's a it's been a benefits you. But also
it's teaching them how to get their own independence, let
them grow. I mean, you know, and you know they
make you know, you trying to tell, you know, schooling
them the best way you can man, not you know,
(04:17):
not school, why but.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
Uh meeting going into the world. Wise.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
If I put that, you know, put it that way,
and you just teach them like look your dudes, and
don'ts and those you do, be careful doing this, don't
do that. And of course they're gonna make mistakes, but
sometimes you know they're gonna make mistakes. But the only
thing you can do, just like I told you. That's
the reason why we tell you these things. We've been
around the block. We know how it is. But you
(04:44):
know how some of the kids are. Man, that's old school,
like all right, that old school stuff is still around.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Believe just the belief. Uh you know, and.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
You know you're always gonna be there for your child,
regardless of how old they are. Hold you are, You're
always gonna be there, depending what the situation is. If
it's some lolly gag crack no no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
But see, I think some of the things, some of
the challenges, like you know, all the stuff we see
in the world, right or what's going on? You know,
do we really want to have them have that experience
of them failing?
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I mean yes, And though you.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
Get what I mean, but you got to I mean,
you don't, I know, you don't want them to fail,
but you let them know what's going on. They gotta
see for themselves what's going on, and hopefully they'll learn
from that as well. Yeah, but failure, I mean, depend
what it is. You're not gonna you never know when
they're gonna. They're gonna fail on certain situations. You gotta
(05:45):
let it be, let them step in it. You know,
they gotta see venture out and see.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
What they can do. It's good for them, benefit them.
Speaker 5 (05:54):
Right then you just have the party is harder, kind
of hard for them falling back and watching and watching
it and you're like, oh, man, I wonder if they
I wonder, how does she doing?
Speaker 4 (06:07):
How do you doing?
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Man? Well, they don't call me like that. Well, they
got their own life. Now, that's the part of hers.
You know, when you were younger, you know, take them
to the movies and all they see, all the animation movies.
Then they get older all sudden, you know, all something
that's like then a something like this.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
And you sit up there.
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Yeah, you know, but it's like I said, you know,
it's it's it's hard. It's very hard. But you in
your cage, you got two right and you know one.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
It's it's I mean them and that might be the
challenge as well with me having more right on one hand,
because it's kind of like ahh and they're two totally different.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
People, right, Like totally totally different.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I see that, yeah, right, And and just how they maneuver
and look at life and all that type of stuff
is two totally different ways. But it's like, hey, one that,
the one that wants to be out and about is
the most fearful one.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Right, which is funny, and the other one is just
laid back right right right.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
You know you would think is to be all the
way around, but it is what it is.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
So my poor little girl, like she wants to be
out in the world, but you know, she's it's like
she wants to be out there, like I said, she
wants to be out there, but she's scared for whatever,
you know, Like like this morning, perfect example, Like this morning, right,
she's on her way to work.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Now what I did not know.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I did see that it rained last night, right right,
but I didn't know how slippery it was. I know
certain areas got a frost, you know, And so she
goes outside, get in the car. Now mind you, She's
like back and forth like this morning. I'm like, what
is going on with her? Like actually back and forth
so much, and then she finally pulls off. She calls
(08:07):
me not even three minutes later. Dad. I'm like, well,
first of all, she calls, I'm like, all right, what's wrong?
Like you know something wrong because you're calling me right right, So,
as you know, She's like, Daddy, Yes, the ABS light
is on. Okay, what are you doing right now? She's like,
I'm just sitting here on the side of the street. Yes,
(08:32):
so is the car moving? Or like, are you is
the light still on? She said, well, no, the light
went off. So what were you doing when the.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
Light was on?
Speaker 1 (08:40):
She said, I was driving and then I hit the
brakes and then the light came on. I said, do
you even know what ABS stands for? And then and
then I said, okay, well, what do you want to do?
(09:01):
You want to continue to drive the work or do
you want to just come on home and catch uber
because I'm not taking you to work. You get what
I mean, especially based on the time, like you need
to hurry up and get there now. Granted she was
a little early, so she could have done that. You
give what I mean, but but it's just like really like, hey,
(09:24):
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (09:25):
You know? But but.
Speaker 5 (09:28):
As many times she'd be putting her foot on the brake,
you never noticed abs, Like.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
No, I guess she didn't realize how like like because
the other day I gave an example. The other day
I was showing her, Hey, this is what happens when
you hit the brake. Do you feel that even though
the car is sliding and still trying to catch right, Like,
do you feel that? Do you feel the pump back
(09:55):
and forth? You know whatever. Again, she's still a new driver, right,
you know. I'm like, I need you to have these experiences,
especially with me, so I could kind of give your
heads up on what how things go. And I mean
because any other morning, again, once again on her way
to work, she felt her car start the fishtail, and
(10:16):
so so she's like, all right, my dad said, you know,
turn into the turn into you know whatever, you know,
And so so I'm glad that she's listening and some
of these things are happening.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So she kind of understands.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
But then it's just like, how often because my wife
said to me, she's like, she's gonna call you for
every little thing, every little.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Thing, and then wait until she moves. Hey, how about that?
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Wait until she moved and so what's funny because the
wife And it's fun that it happened because over the weekend,
my wife sent me an Instagram video where this this
young lady. Uh, she keeps giving on phones like daddy,
can you come and do daddy?
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Can't you come over? Daddy? Can you do it?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And then she responds like, well, yeah, he's here, but Daddy,
I need you, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
So so is my daughter going to be the same
way about?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
You know?
Speaker 1 (11:13):
And now I think I think your challenge is that
your daughter, like you said, so far away, you might
not be able to get the daddy, can you come
and help me?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
No?
Speaker 2 (11:21):
Na? Nah? What about her?
Speaker 5 (11:22):
I noticed because she got one of the type of
person she don't hold when she was driving. She don't
hold the cell phone. She got one of them cell
phone holders. I'll be minr. She'd be like, will she
be backing up a park? I'm like, you know who
you drive white? Like, it's like whoa. She had a
smirk on her face. You drive like your father. You
(11:45):
drive like your father. And she said, you know, when
they be in the car going up the highway to
be traffic and she will slow down and she put
her handss on and she said that friends be laughing
at you her. Why are you putting down Like look,
that's the way my daughter, my father taught me. People know,
slow down, right, If not bam, yep, you know it's crazy.
(12:09):
But with your daughter, she is I mean now, I
mean she's really really.
Speaker 4 (12:14):
Listening to you.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
Yeah, and she wants to be she's being cautious, make
sure she's doing the right thing.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Right.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
It's gonna fade on all the calling. It's gonna fit
on the call.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
And you can be like, yeah, yeah, you might be
ninety nine years old by then, but you know right right.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
You know.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
But but we're saying all us to say, like how
long you know, we understand that our roles in our
kids' lives, right, And I'm not saying like she can't call,
We're not saying that.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
But when do we start to really let go? Right?
Speaker 5 (12:47):
That's the thing is time will tell, right, Time will
tell is no, because it's no exploration date. Everything's going
on that time will tell. So we always be there
for our kids regardless, right, right, And we always want
them to always want them to do better than us, right,
And like I said, but that's situation like time will
(13:08):
tell you know.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
So yeah, and with you talking about your you know,
your daughter in college, there's some things that you know,
maybe you're you're for those of you who are listening,
if you have college students or people that's you know,
think about going to college or whatever else, here's a
resource that y'all could use.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
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Speaker 6 (13:31):
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(13:53):
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Speaker 1 (14:00):
So, you know, if you want to help support the
channel or whatever else, take a look at that. You know,
the cous Word Search Book can be found on that
Amazon store. So, you know, but as you stated, you know,
talking about your your daughter, you know, driving like you
and picking up some of your habits and things like that,
(14:24):
you know, I think you could probably feel a little
more comfortable, right because because because in all reality, she
picked up probably one of your more positive like you
can see your more positive race, right, correct, you know,
But I wonder for those of us that are holding
on too tight? Are we holding on because we see
the negative stuff? Or you're probably about that, you get
(14:45):
what I mean? You know, is that the reason why
we're pulling back while we don't want them to grow?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Right?
Speaker 5 (14:50):
I'm just curious, you know. Or sometime sometimes people get
scared to be alone. You know, you're right about that too,
So you're right, leecially if they're they're only child, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Yeah, excuse me, I mean so so again, you know,
if that's you, you know for yourself, right, you know,
you've you've let go of her going to not just
you know, down the street, you know, because I mean
and granted my kids they they went to school about
(15:23):
a half an hour, depending on traffic, forty five minutes away.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
But your child went away, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Now the other part of that, like for some of us,
you know, hey, hopping in the car, like there's an
issue like hopping in the car and driving is nothing, right,
you get what I mean? But then then there are
some that's just like even in half an hour seems
too far for some people. Yeah, you know what I mean,
(15:57):
you know, so, so you know, I just want how
many y'all that's listening.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Have y'all been able to kind of let go right?
Speaker 4 (16:04):
And how did you go about fading out right? How long?
Speaker 5 (16:08):
You know how long it took you? But you know,
it's it's it's something definitely the ponder, right, ponder especially
the time and the age, you know.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
Yeah, I mean I think it's not gonna be something
that could be done overnight.
Speaker 4 (16:24):
Never Nah, It's gonna take some time.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
It's just like it's up to the individual, because like
I said, it's no time limit, no expiration day, whatever.
It depends on you, how you feel or especially how
you keep that connection with your child. You communicate, I mean,
and you're not maybe not be able to communicate with
them every day or talk to them, and somehow you
might my daughter will she will send me a text,
(16:48):
or she'll FaceTime he talk to me, or she be
in class because you never know what their schedule. I
would let that her contact be because you know, especially
the hour behind us. And you know, I don't know
what you know, like, you know, whatever, you cool?
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Cool? If not? Hey, I understand.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Yeah, I mean I think that's that's kind of my
approach as well. Like when my kids went to school,
you know, I was like, hey, like because I didn't
talk to them, I only spoke to him like every Sunday,
that's my But see, that's kind of our normal check
in day, gotcha. You know, so like during the week,
I don't bother them.
Speaker 4 (17:24):
R me checking day on the weekend, that's sound, that's
a good thing.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
So then because then on Sundays, normally everybody's kind of
slowing down anyway.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Everybody's trying to get ready for the week.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
You know, if y'all party, it was on Friday night
and Saturday night, you get what I mean.
Speaker 5 (17:37):
And you know, especially in college, you know they might
have a clock a class at three or four o'clock,
an you never know.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Right, you know.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
So my thing was like, no, and only give me
an hour, right, and that hour it doesn't even have
to be the full hour. Hey, you know what, just
call call me on FaceTime whatever, you get what I mean,
and just say, hey, this was going on, and I'll
let you go about.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Your day exactly. You know.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
So now that they're home, you know, minor, you know
home now, like we still do that, right, right. You know,
we still do that, like, hey, all right, what's your
schedule like this week? What do you need to get done?
Like so, right now my daughter needs some winshow wiper blades.
If I didn't sit her down last night, you know,
the other night on you know, Sunday, you know, and
like hey, yo, what do you need?
Speaker 2 (18:24):
What's going on? I wouldn't have known, you know, Or hey,
you know, what are your tax information? Cave? Right?
Speaker 4 (18:31):
How about that?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
You know? You know?
Speaker 1 (18:33):
So so I think those are the type of things
that I know that's helped from me, like hey, making
sure that we keep that time because then that way
during the week.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
You could do what you need to do.
Speaker 5 (18:44):
Just give me one day, right, We ain't trying to
hover over, you know, you know, do your thing, you know,
especially you know it's definitely benefiting you, right so you know, right,
like I said, you know that's what I do, text
her or call her the quick text whatever.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
You know.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
It's not like you ain't gonna.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Never talk to your child, right right, I mean, and
I just did one day, especially when they were in school,
because like you said, I didn't want to feel like
I was hovering, right, And I didn't want them.
Speaker 5 (19:16):
I needed them to feel a little free. You have to,
you have to just a little free. It was free
and right, you know, because no doubt you know you're
twenty two or whatever. You know, they know you're technically
an adug, but someone they still your child, right, right,
and you know, still give them their space, but also
(19:37):
still let them know where.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
You're there, right And I think that's the key.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
That's the key.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
I think that's the keys the key, right, you know.
So so y'all, you know, so let us know what
your thoughts are.
Speaker 4 (19:48):
Feel free, you know, shoots a text, email, right, et cetera.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I mean, I don't know if y'all have myself text out?
Speaker 4 (19:54):
Why did I say text?
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Got your cel phone number? You want to give it out? Media?
Speaker 3 (20:06):
Y'all know, y'all went the kids? Oh so y'all. But
we thank y'all very much for listening today.
Speaker 4 (20:18):
And stay cool. Catch you next time.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Yes, talk to y'all peace. Thanks for hanging out with
us on the Neighbors Podcast.
Speaker 6 (20:25):
We hope you enjoyed the conversation and felt right at home.
If you like what you heard, don't be a stranger.
Speaker 4 (20:32):
Subscribe, leave us a review, and share this with your.
Speaker 6 (20:35):
Friends and fam Got something on your mind or a
topic you'd love to hear us talk about.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Hit us up until next time.
Speaker 6 (20:43):
Remember we're all just neighbors working together for a better community.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
Stay safe, stay connected, and we'll catch you in the
next one.
Hey, y'all, thank you very much for listening to the
Neighbors podcast. Yes, yes, yes, and we are going to
set the kids free. Hold on for a set. Let's
talk about it, Danny The Neighbors Podcast with recent Mike.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
They discausing different issues that affect that treating like that.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
It's the Neighbors way, the neighbors.
Speaker 4 (00:27):
Yeah on today, dropping today. How everybody doing.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
So, y'all we're talking about setting the kids free. You
might be wondering what in the world are we talking about? So,
how many of you are holding on to your kids
very tightly? I mean very tightly, very tightly. Are you
allowing them to grow? Are you allowing them to see
(00:55):
the world? Okay, I'm not I'm not letting the mango.
And I'm gonna tell you all the reason why. My
I'm struggling with it a little bit because I see
where the world is going.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:10):
You know, sometimes you kind of want to hold on
a little a little more, a little more right. But
it's not fair though, you know. So my my kids
went to school relatively close to home, you know, when
they went to college. My daughter who now has she
(01:32):
was employed before, but now she has technically a full
time job. You know, it was full time before, but
you know, full time being eight hours a day, right,
but now she's working for.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
City government.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh okay, you know, and she's really been enjoying it
the last two weeks. But come to find out that
she has to move.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
Oh yeah, within a year.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
A year, so so she will be moving and probably
about we're we're looking because it's you know, we're looking
within the next eight months, okay, yeah, and we're looking
at eight months because I really want her to have
(02:18):
the her housing completed before the holidays, for the holidays, you.
Speaker 2 (02:24):
Know what I mean, but before the fall.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
You know, I really want her in there before Thanksgiving
most definitely before Christmas, gotcha, But I really want her
in there before Thanksgiving, you know. So it's going to
take a lot for me to just let go, right, right,
especially with everything that's going on in the world.
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Yeah, yeah, you know I've been that, done that right
right though my daughter she's eight and nine hundred miles away.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
Yeah, and uh, it's hard to cut that in local cord,
very hard.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
But you know, you you women it easy, I mean
not easy.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
But but what what has it been or what did
you do to allow that to really happen.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
I just let it.
Speaker 5 (03:08):
I mean I had to sit down and face reality
that she's away in college and you I can't.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
How can I put this?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
I just I can't keep holding on boo hooing boo,
especially when it's benefiting her right right. You know, quite
a few other friends of mine told me, you know,
but you go away to college, you know, you you
can go through it. You're gonna be boohoo and boom,
You're gonna go through it. You're gonna go through it,
right and you know, and after that, you know, that
(03:41):
first year I was like, oh man, you know, boom boom.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Then she came back.
Speaker 5 (03:44):
Oh cool. But then the second year it started getting better. Okay,
third year.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
When the hell you going?
Speaker 5 (03:57):
And I'm like, goodness, I mean, yeah, it's it's it's
a it's a it's been a benefits you. But also
it's teaching them how to get their own independence, let
them grow. I mean, you know, and you know they
make you know, you trying to tell, you know, schooling
them the best way you can man, not you know,
(04:17):
not school, why but.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
Uh meeting going into the world. Wise.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
If I put that, you know, put it that way,
and you just teach them like look your dudes, and
don'ts and those you do, be careful doing this, don't
do that. And of course they're gonna make mistakes, but
sometimes you know they're gonna make mistakes. But the only
thing you can do, just like I told you. That's
the reason why we tell you these things. We've been
around the block. We know how it is. But you
(04:44):
know how some of the kids are. Man, that's old school,
like all right, that old school stuff is still around.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Believe just the belief. Uh you know, and.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
You know you're always gonna be there for your child,
regardless of how old they are. Hold you are, You're
always gonna be there, depending what the situation is. If
it's some lolly gag crack no no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
But see, I think some of the things, some of
the challenges, like you know, all the stuff we see
in the world, right or what's going on? You know,
do we really want to have them have that experience
of them failing?
Speaker 4 (05:20):
I mean yes, And though you.
Speaker 5 (05:23):
Get what I mean, but you got to I mean,
you don't, I know, you don't want them to fail,
but you let them know what's going on. They gotta
see for themselves what's going on, and hopefully they'll learn
from that as well. Yeah, but failure, I mean, depend
what it is. You're not gonna you never know when
they're gonna. They're gonna fail on certain situations. You gotta
(05:45):
let it be, let them step in it. You know,
they gotta see venture out and see.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
What they can do. It's good for them, benefit them.
Speaker 5 (05:54):
Right then you just have the party is harder, kind
of hard for them falling back and watching and watching
it and you're like, oh, man, I wonder if they
I wonder, how does she doing?
Speaker 4 (06:07):
How do you doing?
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Man? Well, they don't call me like that. Well, they
got their own life. Now, that's the part of hers.
You know, when you were younger, you know, take them
to the movies and all they see, all the animation movies.
Then they get older all sudden, you know, all something
that's like then a something like this.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
And you sit up there.
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Yeah, you know, but it's like I said, you know,
it's it's it's hard. It's very hard. But you in
your cage, you got two right and you know one.
Speaker 1 (06:43):
It's it's I mean them and that might be the
challenge as well with me having more right on one hand,
because it's kind of like ahh and they're two totally different.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
People, right, Like totally totally different.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I see that, yeah, right, And and just how they maneuver
and look at life and all that type of stuff
is two totally different ways. But it's like, hey, one that,
the one that wants to be out and about is
the most fearful one.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
Right, which is funny, and the other one is just
laid back right right right.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
You know you would think is to be all the
way around, but it is what it is.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
So my poor little girl, like she wants to be
out in the world, but you know, she's it's like
she wants to be out there, like I said, she
wants to be out there, but she's scared for whatever,
you know, Like like this morning, perfect example, Like this morning, right,
she's on her way to work.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Now what I did not know.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I did see that it rained last night, right right,
but I didn't know how slippery it was. I know
certain areas got a frost, you know, And so she
goes outside, get in the car. Now mind you, She's
like back and forth like this morning. I'm like, what
is going on with her? Like actually back and forth
so much, and then she finally pulls off. She calls
(08:07):
me not even three minutes later. Dad. I'm like, well,
first of all, she calls, I'm like, all right, what's wrong?
Like you know something wrong because you're calling me right right, So,
as you know, She's like, Daddy, Yes, the ABS light
is on. Okay, what are you doing right now? She's like,
I'm just sitting here on the side of the street. Yes,
(08:32):
so is the car moving? Or like, are you is
the light still on? She said, well, no, the light
went off. So what were you doing when the.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
Light was on?
Speaker 1 (08:40):
She said, I was driving and then I hit the
brakes and then the light came on. I said, do
you even know what ABS stands for? And then and
then I said, okay, well, what do you want to do?
(09:01):
You want to continue to drive the work or do
you want to just come on home and catch uber
because I'm not taking you to work. You get what
I mean, especially based on the time, like you need
to hurry up and get there now. Granted she was
a little early, so she could have done that. You
give what I mean, but but it's just like really like, hey,
(09:24):
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (09:25):
You know? But but.
Speaker 5 (09:28):
As many times she'd be putting her foot on the brake,
you never noticed abs, Like.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
No, I guess she didn't realize how like like because
the other day I gave an example. The other day
I was showing her, Hey, this is what happens when
you hit the brake. Do you feel that even though
the car is sliding and still trying to catch right, Like,
do you feel that? Do you feel the pump back
(09:55):
and forth? You know whatever. Again, she's still a new driver, right,
you know. I'm like, I need you to have these experiences,
especially with me, so I could kind of give your
heads up on what how things go. And I mean
because any other morning, again, once again on her way
to work, she felt her car start the fishtail, and
(10:16):
so so she's like, all right, my dad said, you know,
turn into the turn into you know whatever, you know,
And so so I'm glad that she's listening and some
of these things are happening.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So she kind of understands.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
But then it's just like, how often because my wife
said to me, she's like, she's gonna call you for
every little thing, every little.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Thing, and then wait until she moves. Hey, how about that?
Speaker 1 (10:46):
Wait until she moved and so what's funny because the
wife And it's fun that it happened because over the weekend,
my wife sent me an Instagram video where this this
young lady. Uh, she keeps giving on phones like daddy,
can you come and do daddy?
Speaker 2 (11:02):
Can't you come over? Daddy? Can you do it?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And then she responds like, well, yeah, he's here, but Daddy,
I need you, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
So so is my daughter going to be the same
way about?
Speaker 3 (11:13):
You know?
Speaker 1 (11:13):
And now I think I think your challenge is that
your daughter, like you said, so far away, you might
not be able to get the daddy, can you come
and help me?
Speaker 4 (11:21):
No?
Speaker 2 (11:21):
Na? Nah? What about her?
Speaker 5 (11:22):
I noticed because she got one of the type of
person she don't hold when she was driving. She don't
hold the cell phone. She got one of them cell
phone holders. I'll be minr. She'd be like, will she
be backing up a park? I'm like, you know who
you drive white? Like, it's like whoa. She had a
smirk on her face. You drive like your father. You
(11:45):
drive like your father. And she said, you know, when
they be in the car going up the highway to
be traffic and she will slow down and she put
her handss on and she said that friends be laughing
at you her. Why are you putting down Like look,
that's the way my daughter, my father taught me. People know,
slow down, right, If not bam, yep, you know it's crazy.
(12:09):
But with your daughter, she is I mean now, I
mean she's really really.
Speaker 4 (12:14):
Listening to you.
Speaker 5 (12:16):
Yeah, and she wants to be she's being cautious, make
sure she's doing the right thing.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Right.
Speaker 4 (12:22):
It's gonna fade on all the calling. It's gonna fit
on the call.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
And you can be like, yeah, yeah, you might be
ninety nine years old by then, but you know right right.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
You know.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
But but we're saying all us to say, like how
long you know, we understand that our roles in our
kids' lives, right, And I'm not saying like she can't call,
We're not saying that.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
But when do we start to really let go? Right?
Speaker 5 (12:47):
That's the thing is time will tell, right, Time will
tell is no, because it's no exploration date. Everything's going
on that time will tell. So we always be there
for our kids regardless, right, right, And we always want
them to always want them to do better than us, right,
And like I said, but that's situation like time will
(13:08):
tell you know.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
So yeah, and with you talking about your you know,
your daughter in college, there's some things that you know,
maybe you're you're for those of you who are listening,
if you have college students or people that's you know,
think about going to college or whatever else, here's a
resource that y'all could use.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
While y'all are there.
Speaker 6 (13:31):
Missing the good old college days. Relive those moments with
the College Day's Word Search Book, a fun way to
take a stroll down memory lane. Packed with puzzles inspired
by campus life, late night study sessions, and unforgettable friendships.
It's perfect for alumni, students, and anyone who loves a
good brain teaser. Grab your copy today at Amazon dot
(13:53):
com and bring the best days back to life, one
word search at a time.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
So, you know, if you want to help support the
channel or whatever else, take a look at that. You know,
the cous Word Search Book can be found on that
Amazon store. So, you know, but as you stated, you know,
talking about your your daughter, you know, driving like you
and picking up some of your habits and things like that,
(14:24):
you know, I think you could probably feel a little
more comfortable, right because because because in all reality, she
picked up probably one of your more positive like you
can see your more positive race, right, correct, you know,
But I wonder for those of us that are holding
on too tight? Are we holding on because we see
the negative stuff? Or you're probably about that, you get
(14:45):
what I mean? You know, is that the reason why
we're pulling back while we don't want them to grow?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Right?
Speaker 5 (14:50):
I'm just curious, you know. Or sometime sometimes people get
scared to be alone. You know, you're right about that too,
So you're right, leecially if they're they're only child, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Yeah, excuse me, I mean so so again, you know,
if that's you, you know for yourself, right, you know,
you've you've let go of her going to not just
you know, down the street, you know, because I mean
and granted my kids they they went to school about
(15:23):
a half an hour, depending on traffic, forty five minutes away.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
But your child went away, you know.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
Now the other part of that, like for some of us,
you know, hey, hopping in the car, like there's an
issue like hopping in the car and driving is nothing, right,
you get what I mean? But then then there are
some that's just like even in half an hour seems
too far for some people. Yeah, you know what I mean,
(15:57):
you know, so, so you know, I just want how
many y'all that's listening.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
Have y'all been able to kind of let go right?
Speaker 4 (16:04):
And how did you go about fading out right? How long?
Speaker 5 (16:08):
You know how long it took you? But you know,
it's it's it's something definitely the ponder, right, ponder especially
the time and the age, you know.
Speaker 1 (16:19):
Yeah, I mean I think it's not gonna be something
that could be done overnight.
Speaker 4 (16:24):
Never Nah, It's gonna take some time.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
It's just like it's up to the individual, because like
I said, it's no time limit, no expiration day, whatever.
It depends on you, how you feel or especially how
you keep that connection with your child. You communicate, I mean,
and you're not maybe not be able to communicate with
them every day or talk to them, and somehow you
might my daughter will she will send me a text,
(16:48):
or she'll FaceTime he talk to me, or she be
in class because you never know what their schedule. I
would let that her contact be because you know, especially
the hour behind us. And you know, I don't know
what you know, like, you know, whatever, you cool?
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Cool? If not? Hey, I understand.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
Yeah, I mean I think that's that's kind of my
approach as well. Like when my kids went to school,
you know, I was like, hey, like because I didn't
talk to them, I only spoke to him like every Sunday,
that's my But see, that's kind of our normal check
in day, gotcha. You know, so like during the week,
I don't bother them.
Speaker 4 (17:24):
R me checking day on the weekend, that's sound, that's
a good thing.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:27):
So then because then on Sundays, normally everybody's kind of
slowing down anyway.
Speaker 2 (17:31):
Everybody's trying to get ready for the week.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
You know, if y'all party, it was on Friday night
and Saturday night, you get what I mean.
Speaker 5 (17:37):
And you know, especially in college, you know they might
have a clock a class at three or four o'clock,
an you never know.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Right, you know.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
So my thing was like, no, and only give me
an hour, right, and that hour it doesn't even have
to be the full hour. Hey, you know what, just
call call me on FaceTime whatever, you get what I mean,
and just say, hey, this was going on, and I'll
let you go about.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Your day exactly. You know.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
So now that they're home, you know, minor, you know
home now, like we still do that, right, right. You know,
we still do that, like, hey, all right, what's your
schedule like this week? What do you need to get done?
Like so, right now my daughter needs some winshow wiper blades.
If I didn't sit her down last night, you know,
the other night on you know, Sunday, you know, and
like hey, yo, what do you need?
Speaker 2 (18:24):
What's going on? I wouldn't have known, you know, Or hey,
you know, what are your tax information? Cave? Right?
Speaker 4 (18:31):
How about that?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
You know? You know?
Speaker 1 (18:33):
So so I think those are the type of things
that I know that's helped from me, like hey, making
sure that we keep that time because then that way
during the week.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
You could do what you need to do.
Speaker 5 (18:44):
Just give me one day, right, We ain't trying to
hover over, you know, you know, do your thing, you know,
especially you know it's definitely benefiting you, right so you know, right,
like I said, you know that's what I do, text
her or call her the quick text whatever.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
You know.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
It's not like you ain't gonna.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Never talk to your child, right right, I mean, and
I just did one day, especially when they were in school,
because like you said, I didn't want to feel like
I was hovering, right, And I didn't want them.
Speaker 5 (19:16):
I needed them to feel a little free. You have to,
you have to just a little free. It was free
and right, you know, because no doubt you know you're
twenty two or whatever. You know, they know you're technically
an adug, but someone they still your child, right, right,
and you know, still give them their space, but also
(19:37):
still let them know where.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
You're there, right And I think that's the key.
Speaker 4 (19:41):
That's the key.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
I think that's the keys the key, right, you know.
So so y'all, you know, so let us know what
your thoughts are.
Speaker 4 (19:48):
Feel free, you know, shoots a text, email, right, et cetera.
Speaker 2 (19:52):
I mean, I don't know if y'all have myself text out?
Speaker 4 (19:54):
Why did I say text?
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Got your cel phone number? You want to give it out? Media?
Speaker 3 (20:06):
Y'all know, y'all went the kids? Oh so y'all. But
we thank y'all very much for listening today.
Speaker 4 (20:18):
And stay cool. Catch you next time.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Yes, talk to y'all peace. Thanks for hanging out with
us on the Neighbors Podcast.
Speaker 6 (20:25):
We hope you enjoyed the conversation and felt right at home.
If you like what you heard, don't be a stranger.
Speaker 4 (20:32):
Subscribe, leave us a review, and share this with your.
Speaker 6 (20:35):
Friends and fam Got something on your mind or a
topic you'd love to hear us talk about.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Hit us up until next time.
Speaker 6 (20:43):
Remember we're all just neighbors working together for a better community.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
Stay safe, stay connected, and we'll catch you in the
next one.
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