May 24, 2023 • 19 mins
It’s a new day over here in podcast world, I have completely changed the format of the show and will recording rouge from various parts of my finca in Costa Rica. We started a new podcast at Heartcast Media called Camp Content and its all you could ever want to know about marketing, content, leadership, etc. Which is great because now this podcast can be more personal and more of an outlet for me and my life in Costa Rica. I hope you enjoy the new format, let me know if there is anything you want to know about living abroad and what it took to get here.
Thanks yall.
Sponsored by Heartcast Media
https://www.heartcastmedia.com/
Book a Discovery Call: https://calendly.com/mollyruland/discovery-chat-molly-ruland
Thanks yall.
Sponsored by Heartcast Media
https://www.heartcastmedia.com/
Book a Discovery Call: https://calendly.com/mollyruland/discovery-chat-molly-ruland
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:11):
Hey, hey, hey, it'sme been a minute. I know,
I got some exciting news for you. I have decided to make a big
change with the podcast and take itin a different direction, and so I
wanted to record an episode and talkabout that a little bit and my decision
to do that, I am changingthe format. I'm going to be recording
(00:32):
it on my shore M the eightyeight with my cell phone, so that
way I can it's a little bitmore impersonal and I don't have to be
at my desk and look like everythingelse that I record. And we started
a new podcast at Hardcast Media calledcamp Content, where we're really talking about
content marketing and how to use thatin your business and brandom podcasts. So
(00:52):
there's really no need for me tohave another podcast about business development or marketing
or any of that. So andI noticed that, you know, for
those who are listening, and youknow a few of you have commented and
stuff, Um, you seem tobe more interested in my personal life and
Costa Rica and things like that.And I'm totally cool with that because I
kind of need an outlet, andbecause I was like robbed when I first
(01:15):
moved here. I've been a littlesquirrely about like sharing too much. I
don't know, like just you knowmakes me really hesitant to like post big
pictures in my house or my neighborhoodor just you know, give too much
personal information. But I feel like, um, I mean not that I'm
gonna send you my coordinates, butI just feel like it's it's okay to
have more of a personal outlet withthis podcast and share some of the spaces
(01:40):
that I love so much at myhouse, Um, like my back patio
year where I have lots of plantsand I spend a lot of time because
it's beautiful back here. But um, yeah, So the next the next
one is really about the next hundreddays. Because since the last time we
saw each other or the last timeI recorded it an episode, I should
(02:00):
say a lot has changed. Mycompany almost went under. I had an
employee really let me down in alot of ways. It's no longer with
us with the company, and it'sbeen difficult. It's been super super difficult.
I'm not even gonna front. SoI'm in the process of like climbing
(02:20):
back out of that. And Ifigured this is a good time to,
you know, reinvest my time intothe next one hundred and share more personal
content. You know how I gothere, what I'm doing, what I'm
struggling with, because I do thinkthat my voices can be valuable for other
women, other people in general,and I think it'll be really good for
(02:43):
me to have an outlet. SoI'm gonna lean on the team less for
editing and things like that. It'llbe a little bit more raw and much
less about business. And so thenext one hundred is really about the next
one hundred days, right, becauseif I've learned anything in the last one
hundred days is that you know,anything can happen, and good and bad,
(03:04):
and so if you really focus onthe next one hundred days, you
can change your life. You know. I saw this post on the internet
that was like, if you spenteight hours a day for like six months
or something, you could drastically improveyour life. I can't remember what it
was, but it's true, likeif you spend that time, then your
life gets better and so whatever itis, Like, you know, I
was listening to Tommy Ribs. He'sa trainer on iFIT, which is like
(03:29):
the Nordic track thing that's attached tomy treadmill, and he went I can't
remember where, but it was thisreally really old town. Oh it was
Venice and just the water damage.And he was giving history super smart so
that you learn a lot. Buthe was talking about the tremendous amount of
work that just goes into the maintenance, right and just making sure the city
(03:50):
doesn't crumble anymore. But it's somuch work. But those city still looks,
you know, debilitated and crumbling becauseof all that constant water damage,
right, But the amount of workthat goes into just maintaining that, And
it was it's a good reminder thatsometimes you don't always have to see progress,
you know, but there's a lotof work that goes into maintaining and
(04:10):
I think when you put efforts inthat little things like exercising, or being
accountable to yourself or eating a littlehealth it's just these little tiny steps.
Everything in life is a muscle thatyou exercise, and so you can either
strengthen the wrong muscles and the wronghabits or focusing on strengthening better ones.
And I don't think it's about immediateprogress or a dollar amount. It's just
(04:32):
really like holding yourself accountable. SoI'm excited to have a little less pressure
with this podcast and just be ableto like sit in my yard and talk
to you guys and share some ofmy life with you. It's been,
you know, it's been quite thejourney here in Costa Rica. The last
couple of months been really overcast,and it's been really hard to not be
(04:53):
stressed and super depressed because life hasbeen really difficult. And then it's like
gloomy as hell outside every day,and that doesn't help. So I did
some work this morning, and Igot on the treadmill and I did my
little thing and the best I could. And so I'm going to spend the
rest of the day outside in thesunshine because I need it. I need
(05:15):
that vitamin D and I just wantto be outside and like maybe plant some
stuff and just enjoy the time withmy puppies outside and hanging out. So
the next one hundred it's just,you know, the next one hundred days
and what are we doing and howcan we make our lives better? So
maybe some of the things that Ican share with you will will help you
(05:38):
on your journey too, right,Like that's that's the only the only thing
we can hope. And so Iwas thinking the other day like, I
keep having these moments of like,you know, living in coast Freakat is
super quiet, so you have allthese moments of like self reflection, you
know, where're like I just soundthis quiet time and you think about these
(06:04):
things that you forgot about, youknow, because life moves really fast,
and you just have these memories.And the other day I was blowed,
you're having my hair, and Iremembered, you know, I was really
excited about this meeting with these twowomen from DC, and I just like,
it just really made me miss DC, and it made me miss the
people of DC, I should say, you know, and I started thinking
(06:28):
about, like, what was itabout them that I was like, really
that was really resonating with me,and and it just reminded me of like
who I am and how I gotthis way. And so I wanted to
share this with you because I thinkit's very relevant. When I was in
my twenties, well, when Iwas twenty three, I bought a house.
(06:49):
I left home in seventeen. Ihad my first final surgery at nineteen,
and when I was twenty three,I bought a house. I was
in real estate finance at the time, and I was getting everybody else's houses.
I thought, I'm gonna get meone too, and so I bought
a house and um, I wasliving there with my boyfriend for a couple
of months and we broke up,and so I was there by myself and
(07:13):
one of the agents that I hadworked with brought this woman over named Doria
Doocet, and Doria, um justtook a liking to me. I had
like dreadlocks. Don't hate me,Um, I had dreadlocks night. You
know, I was like growing weed, you know, and which was pretty
like sketchy back then, you know, um for sure, kind of dumb,
(07:38):
definitely, but I had really goodweed. And so she was like,
I'm gonna take you out this weekend, you know, like I'm gonna
pick come, pick you up.I'm gonna take you out. I'm like,
all right, I'm liking like,you know, bellbottomed jeans and like,
h you know, like I'm aI'm a hit, like I'm a
hippie. Like I don't you know, I'm not really into that. This
is like early two thousands, andlittle do I know that Doria ran well,
(08:01):
just Doria is like one of themost amazing people you'll ever meet in
your life. And she was therelike when Biggie got shot, and she
was there when Snoop was handing outmixtapes, and like she's just legendary and
anybody was black whoever did anything,she knows them, like Christopher Warren,
you know, to to Ray Lois, to Mike Tyson, to every single
you know. I mean just literallyname anybody you know, and Michael Westbrook,
(08:26):
Like she knew all of them.And she ran she did a lot.
But one of the things she wasdoing was she ran the VIP section
at Platinum and DC Live, whichwere the two biggest like black nightclubs in
DC. And you know, inthe early two thousands, DC was like
very black and very beautiful and verymuch a center for like culture. It
(08:50):
was a very different town than itis now. And Doria was in the
mix of that. And so sheused to just like drag me out to
these nightclubs. And I mean,I was such a fish out of water,
Like I go to raves and likeGrateful Dead shows and stuff, and
I was not like a nightclub girl. And so I'd go with like sweat
pants on and like a mock turtleneckand like, you know, just ab
(09:13):
told owner of the club like theywould they would like they would constantly throw
me out of the iba. Thenthe other security, which was like let
me back in that like they don'tknow that you're with Adoria, And even
the owner of the club would comeup to me and just say, like,
can you please stop wearing sweat pantsto my nightclub? But I was
with Adoria, and I was withSnoop or I was with you know whoever,
(09:35):
you know, trat Shine, MikeTyson, like who literally insert name.
I was there, and so youknow, I'm sure there's some pictures
of those clubs back in the dayand I probably stand out like a sore
thumb. But Adoria was one ofmy biggest influences because you know, I
left home at seventeen, as Imentioned, and I didn't have a lot
of family support and definitely not alot of internal support, and Adora sort
(09:58):
of filled that gap for me.And Adoria was the most just, you
know, dynamic person I've ever met. She's from New Orleans and she just
has this very unique perspective on things, and she was my biggest influence in
my twenties, and I just reallystarted thinking about what that meant for me
and you know, you know howI gotta kind of got this way and
(10:22):
like where my where my interests,in my loyalties lives because when you know,
my family didn't care about me,Adoria did, and of course she
influenced me. I was in mytwenties. I was, so I grew
up in falls Church. It's likethis big and you know, I had
very little experience. You know,it's um, it's really funny because these
(10:46):
lines killing me all of a sudden. But in my high school, I
went to Georgia in high school andthere was six hundred kids and it was
six through twelfth grade. There's nota lot of people, you know,
and I was a president and thefounder of the Multicultural Awareness Committee, and
there's like eight black kids in theentire school, you know. So like
(11:07):
my first best friend was you know, Camboodian and he lived next door.
So like, I don't know,I just had always had a different kind
of a like I don't know,perspective on things. And the TV that
was available in the eighties was likevery different than the TV that's now.
So I just always, you know, just never really felt like I fit
in with my own family, andso I would adapt to any environment that
(11:28):
I was in. And that wasespecially important in my twenties because you're so
impressionable. And here I am hangingout with a woman who's got you know,
Mike Tyson on speed out. AndI mean I could the stories that
I could tell, y'all, youwouldn't even think they're true. You would
think I was lying to you,you know, like being at Ray Lewis's
house the weekend after he won theMVP of the Super Bowl, you know,
(11:48):
two years after he was accused ofpremurder. So like, my life
is crazy, but all of it. And I could tell stories upon stories
upon stories and was never in anydanger or unsafe or treated with any lack
of respect, and so that Ihave no bad stories. But what I
learned from Adria and from meeting allthose wildly successful people was that anything as
(12:16):
possible, you know, And Imet everybody. I met every body that
was on the radio. And mindyou, this is the early two thousand,
like Ludicrous was on the radio andNellie, you know, like it
was just a different time, spinningrims and TV's in the back of the
sea. You know, it wasjust a different time. There was so
much good music on the radio.It's fun. And I met every single
(12:41):
one of them, you know,job, I mean literally I met them
all, and what I learned fromthat is that some of them were assholes.
Most of them were super assholes whohad just didn't want to hang out
with you know what I mean.The nicest one of all of them,
(13:03):
well, the top three Snoop,literally the most genuine, the nicest guy
you ever met in your life,ray Lewis shockingly also super nice. And
who was the third person I wasjust gonna mention, I don't know,
I can't, I can't remember rightnow, but like, oh, Mike
Tyson also super nice guy, rightLike. But what I learned from all
(13:26):
of that, you know, fromjust seeing so many successful people, right
and I was able to just say, Okay, well, what are the
common characteristics here? And there wasonly one and there's only one and it
was dogged determination. You know,Um, they worked really hard. You
know, all of those people thatI just mentioned worked really hard. Ray
(13:48):
Lewis, Mike Tyson, Snoop,some of the hardest working people out there,
and they were just humble and nice, you know. Exhibit also one
of the nicest guys you ever meet, but like humble and nice and hard
working and it and it taught methat, you know, it wasn't all
talent. And those guys are talented, don't get me wrong, but talent
isn't what makes or breaks you.Intelligence isn't. It's determination. It's like
(14:09):
the ability to get knocked down andget back up again. If you think
about the things that Snoop faced inhis life, you know, when he
was younger, with you know,death row and the murder charge and all
that stuff, like he thought hewas going to go to jail. His
life could have been different. MikeTyson was accused of rape, all kinds
of crazy shit. He Evander Holyfield'sear off. I mean, bro,
(14:31):
you know, also never held asa baby, hypnotized by this lunatic.
I mean, if y'all knew MikeTyson's story, it's wild, right,
And ray lewis too hard working guyman, hard working guy. And it
just taught me that I could doanything that I wanted in life if I
was willing to work hard for it. And of course it was cool,
but it was also intimidating because I'mjust a girl from Falls Church. I
(14:54):
acted like I knew what I wasdoing. But you know, it's pretty
intimidating, and like you know,I was a total fishing out of water.
But but it was such a valuablelesson that I could do anything I
wanted in life if I worked hardfor it. But what I what I
didn't realize, is that I hadto figure out what I wanted. And
I just always assumed that like itwould come to me, or I would
(15:15):
get it, or that family wouldhappen, or that life that I thought
everybody got I would get. Butthat's not really how it works, right,
So I think the big lesson,you know, for me is and
it's a little easier sitting in CostaRica for sure, because I definitely want
to be here. But you cando any anything as possible, Like anything
is legitimately possible if you're willing todo the work, and a lot of
(15:41):
people just aren't willing to do thework. And sometimes I'm not willing to
do it either. You know,we have ebbs and flows. I had
PTSD, I couldn't do the work, you know, so anything as possible,
and remember your roots and where youcame from. Because you know,
(16:02):
people wondering why my lens is alittle different. I'm always talking about white
people. First of all, I'mhalf kidding, but because that's my roots,
is that's the community that took mein and loved me a Doria Doo
said, you know, loved meand she was a you know, you
know is she's not going anything,but you know, she's a flawed person,
just like the rest of us.Did She give me great advice and
influenced all the time. Now,but what she taught me changed my entire
(16:25):
life. And and of course I'mgoing to be influenced by that community.
It was the one that took mein and loved me and supported me and
gave me a home. And soif you know, maybe that explains,
you know, some of my irrationalrage. Sometimes it's actually very rational,
it's not rage. But um,yeah, you know, life is life
(16:47):
is really funny, you know.Um. And I feel the most comfortable
when I'm the most out of place, you know. And I don't know
what that means, but I haveconsistently put myself in places throughout my life
where I am out of place.So I don't know. Maybe I'm trying
(17:08):
to figure out where I belong ormaybe I don't belong anywhere, or maybe
I belong everywhere, but um,I just kind of wanted to share that
with you and you know, giveme a little insight about who I am
and really think about you know,who you who you are, right,
because I think it's just easy toforget some of those core, you know,
pillars of who we are as aperson, like founding the Multicultural Awareness
(17:32):
Committee, like you know, whodid that? Nobody's told me to do
that. My parents were so disconnectedfrom me, you know, because I
grew so fast and shit, andI don't even know if I told you
all that story, but you know, I look like a five year old
by the time I was two.Is everybody talk to me like I was
a forty year old since I wasthree years old? And you know,
(17:53):
it's just, um, it's adifferent it's a different time. It's a
different time. Anyway, I thinkthis is enough for one episode. I
just really wanted to reach out andsay, you know, if you're listening,
thank you. I hope you likethe new format. I hope that
you're cool with this different journey thatI'm heading on, just sharing like my
(18:14):
truth and the things that I'm thinkingabout. And of course there'll be some
business stuff in there, because Ispend a lot of my time thinking about
that stuff, and so when Ihave these realizations, I'm going to share
them with you. But I'm hopingto take some of the pressure off this
new format and feeling the more consistent, and share some more of my beautiful
yard that I love so much,and hopefully give you guys a little break.
(18:37):
And maybe the bird sounds and thejungle noises are a little intrusive on
the podcast, or maybe I'm comingin hot like MPR, but either way,
I really appreciate you hanging out withme and listening to this podcast and
showing me some love. So Ihope you guys have a fantastic day and
yeah, man, be good,I'll catch them. Hey, thanks for
(19:03):
tuning in to the podcast today.I know your time is valuable and you
could spend it in any way,but you chose to spend it with me
today, so thank you for that. If there's anything I can do to
help you or your business or justhave a conversation, I'm here. Hit
me up on my website. Thanksagain, have a great day. Produced
by Heartcast Media
Hey, hey, hey, it'sme been a minute. I know,
I got some exciting news for you. I have decided to make a big
change with the podcast and take itin a different direction, and so I
wanted to record an episode and talkabout that a little bit and my decision
to do that, I am changingthe format. I'm going to be recording
(00:32):
it on my shore M the eightyeight with my cell phone, so that
way I can it's a little bitmore impersonal and I don't have to be
at my desk and look like everythingelse that I record. And we started
a new podcast at Hardcast Media calledcamp Content, where we're really talking about
content marketing and how to use thatin your business and brandom podcasts. So
(00:52):
there's really no need for me tohave another podcast about business development or marketing
or any of that. So andI noticed that, you know, for
those who are listening, and youknow a few of you have commented and
stuff, Um, you seem tobe more interested in my personal life and
Costa Rica and things like that.And I'm totally cool with that because I
kind of need an outlet, andbecause I was like robbed when I first
(01:15):
moved here. I've been a littlesquirrely about like sharing too much. I
don't know, like just you knowmakes me really hesitant to like post big
pictures in my house or my neighborhoodor just you know, give too much
personal information. But I feel like, um, I mean not that I'm
gonna send you my coordinates, butI just feel like it's it's okay to
have more of a personal outlet withthis podcast and share some of the spaces
(01:40):
that I love so much at myhouse, Um, like my back patio
year where I have lots of plantsand I spend a lot of time because
it's beautiful back here. But um, yeah, So the next the next
one is really about the next hundreddays. Because since the last time we
saw each other or the last timeI recorded it an episode, I should
(02:00):
say a lot has changed. Mycompany almost went under. I had an
employee really let me down in alot of ways. It's no longer with
us with the company, and it'sbeen difficult. It's been super super difficult.
I'm not even gonna front. SoI'm in the process of like climbing
(02:20):
back out of that. And Ifigured this is a good time to,
you know, reinvest my time intothe next one hundred and share more personal
content. You know how I gothere, what I'm doing, what I'm
struggling with, because I do thinkthat my voices can be valuable for other
women, other people in general,and I think it'll be really good for
(02:43):
me to have an outlet. SoI'm gonna lean on the team less for
editing and things like that. It'llbe a little bit more raw and much
less about business. And so thenext one hundred is really about the next
one hundred days, right, becauseif I've learned anything in the last one
hundred days is that you know,anything can happen, and good and bad,
(03:04):
and so if you really focus onthe next one hundred days, you
can change your life. You know. I saw this post on the internet
that was like, if you spenteight hours a day for like six months
or something, you could drastically improveyour life. I can't remember what it
was, but it's true, likeif you spend that time, then your
life gets better and so whatever itis, Like, you know, I
was listening to Tommy Ribs. He'sa trainer on iFIT, which is like
(03:29):
the Nordic track thing that's attached tomy treadmill, and he went I can't
remember where, but it was thisreally really old town. Oh it was
Venice and just the water damage.And he was giving history super smart so
that you learn a lot. Buthe was talking about the tremendous amount of
work that just goes into the maintenance, right and just making sure the city
(03:50):
doesn't crumble anymore. But it's somuch work. But those city still looks,
you know, debilitated and crumbling becauseof all that constant water damage,
right, But the amount of workthat goes into just maintaining that, And
it was it's a good reminder thatsometimes you don't always have to see progress,
you know, but there's a lotof work that goes into maintaining and
(04:10):
I think when you put efforts inthat little things like exercising, or being
accountable to yourself or eating a littlehealth it's just these little tiny steps.
Everything in life is a muscle thatyou exercise, and so you can either
strengthen the wrong muscles and the wronghabits or focusing on strengthening better ones.
And I don't think it's about immediateprogress or a dollar amount. It's just
(04:32):
really like holding yourself accountable. SoI'm excited to have a little less pressure
with this podcast and just be ableto like sit in my yard and talk
to you guys and share some ofmy life with you. It's been,
you know, it's been quite thejourney here in Costa Rica. The last
couple of months been really overcast,and it's been really hard to not be
(04:53):
stressed and super depressed because life hasbeen really difficult. And then it's like
gloomy as hell outside every day,and that doesn't help. So I did
some work this morning, and Igot on the treadmill and I did my
little thing and the best I could. And so I'm going to spend the
rest of the day outside in thesunshine because I need it. I need
(05:15):
that vitamin D and I just wantto be outside and like maybe plant some
stuff and just enjoy the time withmy puppies outside and hanging out. So
the next one hundred it's just,you know, the next one hundred days
and what are we doing and howcan we make our lives better? So
maybe some of the things that Ican share with you will will help you
(05:38):
on your journey too, right,Like that's that's the only the only thing
we can hope. And so Iwas thinking the other day like, I
keep having these moments of like,you know, living in coast Freakat is
super quiet, so you have allthese moments of like self reflection, you
know, where're like I just soundthis quiet time and you think about these
(06:04):
things that you forgot about, youknow, because life moves really fast,
and you just have these memories.And the other day I was blowed,
you're having my hair, and Iremembered, you know, I was really
excited about this meeting with these twowomen from DC, and I just like,
it just really made me miss DC, and it made me miss the
people of DC, I should say, you know, and I started thinking
(06:28):
about, like, what was itabout them that I was like, really
that was really resonating with me,and and it just reminded me of like
who I am and how I gotthis way. And so I wanted to
share this with you because I thinkit's very relevant. When I was in
my twenties, well, when Iwas twenty three, I bought a house.
(06:49):
I left home in seventeen. Ihad my first final surgery at nineteen,
and when I was twenty three,I bought a house. I was
in real estate finance at the time, and I was getting everybody else's houses.
I thought, I'm gonna get meone too, and so I bought
a house and um, I wasliving there with my boyfriend for a couple
of months and we broke up,and so I was there by myself and
(07:13):
one of the agents that I hadworked with brought this woman over named Doria
Doocet, and Doria, um justtook a liking to me. I had
like dreadlocks. Don't hate me,Um, I had dreadlocks night. You
know, I was like growing weed, you know, and which was pretty
like sketchy back then, you know, um for sure, kind of dumb,
(07:38):
definitely, but I had really goodweed. And so she was like,
I'm gonna take you out this weekend, you know, like I'm gonna
pick come, pick you up.I'm gonna take you out. I'm like,
all right, I'm liking like,you know, bellbottomed jeans and like,
h you know, like I'm aI'm a hit, like I'm a
hippie. Like I don't you know, I'm not really into that. This
is like early two thousands, andlittle do I know that Doria ran well,
(08:01):
just Doria is like one of themost amazing people you'll ever meet in
your life. And she was therelike when Biggie got shot, and she
was there when Snoop was handing outmixtapes, and like she's just legendary and
anybody was black whoever did anything,she knows them, like Christopher Warren,
you know, to to Ray Lois, to Mike Tyson, to every single
you know. I mean just literallyname anybody you know, and Michael Westbrook,
(08:26):
Like she knew all of them.And she ran she did a lot.
But one of the things she wasdoing was she ran the VIP section
at Platinum and DC Live, whichwere the two biggest like black nightclubs in
DC. And you know, inthe early two thousands, DC was like
very black and very beautiful and verymuch a center for like culture. It
(08:50):
was a very different town than itis now. And Doria was in the
mix of that. And so sheused to just like drag me out to
these nightclubs. And I mean,I was such a fish out of water,
Like I go to raves and likeGrateful Dead shows and stuff, and
I was not like a nightclub girl. And so I'd go with like sweat
pants on and like a mock turtleneckand like, you know, just ab
(09:13):
told owner of the club like theywould they would like they would constantly throw
me out of the iba. Thenthe other security, which was like let
me back in that like they don'tknow that you're with Adoria, And even
the owner of the club would comeup to me and just say, like,
can you please stop wearing sweat pantsto my nightclub? But I was
with Adoria, and I was withSnoop or I was with you know whoever,
(09:35):
you know, trat Shine, MikeTyson, like who literally insert name.
I was there, and so youknow, I'm sure there's some pictures
of those clubs back in the dayand I probably stand out like a sore
thumb. But Adoria was one ofmy biggest influences because you know, I
left home at seventeen, as Imentioned, and I didn't have a lot
of family support and definitely not alot of internal support, and Adora sort
(09:58):
of filled that gap for me.And Adoria was the most just, you
know, dynamic person I've ever met. She's from New Orleans and she just
has this very unique perspective on things, and she was my biggest influence in
my twenties, and I just reallystarted thinking about what that meant for me
and you know, you know howI gotta kind of got this way and
(10:22):
like where my where my interests,in my loyalties lives because when you know,
my family didn't care about me,Adoria did, and of course she
influenced me. I was in mytwenties. I was, so I grew
up in falls Church. It's likethis big and you know, I had
very little experience. You know,it's um, it's really funny because these
(10:46):
lines killing me all of a sudden. But in my high school, I
went to Georgia in high school andthere was six hundred kids and it was
six through twelfth grade. There's nota lot of people, you know,
and I was a president and thefounder of the Multicultural Awareness Committee, and
there's like eight black kids in theentire school, you know. So like
(11:07):
my first best friend was you know, Camboodian and he lived next door.
So like, I don't know,I just had always had a different kind
of a like I don't know,perspective on things. And the TV that
was available in the eighties was likevery different than the TV that's now.
So I just always, you know, just never really felt like I fit
in with my own family, andso I would adapt to any environment that
(11:28):
I was in. And that wasespecially important in my twenties because you're so
impressionable. And here I am hangingout with a woman who's got you know,
Mike Tyson on speed out. AndI mean I could the stories that
I could tell, y'all, youwouldn't even think they're true. You would
think I was lying to you,you know, like being at Ray Lewis's
house the weekend after he won theMVP of the Super Bowl, you know,
(11:48):
two years after he was accused ofpremurder. So like, my life
is crazy, but all of it. And I could tell stories upon stories
upon stories and was never in anydanger or unsafe or treated with any lack
of respect, and so that Ihave no bad stories. But what I
learned from Adria and from meeting allthose wildly successful people was that anything as
(12:16):
possible, you know, And Imet everybody. I met every body that
was on the radio. And mindyou, this is the early two thousand,
like Ludicrous was on the radio andNellie, you know, like it
was just a different time, spinningrims and TV's in the back of the
sea. You know, it wasjust a different time. There was so
much good music on the radio.It's fun. And I met every single
(12:41):
one of them, you know,job, I mean literally I met them
all, and what I learned fromthat is that some of them were assholes.
Most of them were super assholes whohad just didn't want to hang out
with you know what I mean.The nicest one of all of them,
(13:03):
well, the top three Snoop,literally the most genuine, the nicest guy
you ever met in your life,ray Lewis shockingly also super nice. And
who was the third person I wasjust gonna mention, I don't know,
I can't, I can't remember rightnow, but like, oh, Mike
Tyson also super nice guy, rightLike. But what I learned from all
(13:26):
of that, you know, fromjust seeing so many successful people, right
and I was able to just say, Okay, well, what are the
common characteristics here? And there wasonly one and there's only one and it
was dogged determination. You know,Um, they worked really hard. You
know, all of those people thatI just mentioned worked really hard. Ray
(13:48):
Lewis, Mike Tyson, Snoop,some of the hardest working people out there,
and they were just humble and nice, you know. Exhibit also one
of the nicest guys you ever meet, but like humble and nice and hard
working and it and it taught methat, you know, it wasn't all
talent. And those guys are talented, don't get me wrong, but talent
isn't what makes or breaks you.Intelligence isn't. It's determination. It's like
(14:09):
the ability to get knocked down andget back up again. If you think
about the things that Snoop faced inhis life, you know, when he
was younger, with you know,death row and the murder charge and all
that stuff, like he thought hewas going to go to jail. His
life could have been different. MikeTyson was accused of rape, all kinds
of crazy shit. He Evander Holyfield'sear off. I mean, bro,
(14:31):
you know, also never held asa baby, hypnotized by this lunatic.
I mean, if y'all knew MikeTyson's story, it's wild, right,
And ray lewis too hard working guyman, hard working guy. And it
just taught me that I could doanything that I wanted in life if I
was willing to work hard for it. And of course it was cool,
but it was also intimidating because I'mjust a girl from Falls Church. I
(14:54):
acted like I knew what I wasdoing. But you know, it's pretty
intimidating, and like you know,I was a total fishing out of water.
But but it was such a valuablelesson that I could do anything I
wanted in life if I worked hardfor it. But what I what I
didn't realize, is that I hadto figure out what I wanted. And
I just always assumed that like itwould come to me, or I would
(15:15):
get it, or that family wouldhappen, or that life that I thought
everybody got I would get. Butthat's not really how it works, right,
So I think the big lesson,you know, for me is and
it's a little easier sitting in CostaRica for sure, because I definitely want
to be here. But you cando any anything as possible, Like anything
is legitimately possible if you're willing todo the work, and a lot of
(15:41):
people just aren't willing to do thework. And sometimes I'm not willing to
do it either. You know,we have ebbs and flows. I had
PTSD, I couldn't do the work, you know, so anything as possible,
and remember your roots and where youcame from. Because you know,
(16:02):
people wondering why my lens is alittle different. I'm always talking about white
people. First of all, I'mhalf kidding, but because that's my roots,
is that's the community that took mein and loved me a Doria Doo
said, you know, loved meand she was a you know, you
know is she's not going anything,but you know, she's a flawed person,
just like the rest of us.Did She give me great advice and
influenced all the time. Now,but what she taught me changed my entire
(16:25):
life. And and of course I'mgoing to be influenced by that community.
It was the one that took mein and loved me and supported me and
gave me a home. And soif you know, maybe that explains,
you know, some of my irrationalrage. Sometimes it's actually very rational,
it's not rage. But um,yeah, you know, life is life
(16:47):
is really funny, you know.Um. And I feel the most comfortable
when I'm the most out of place, you know. And I don't know
what that means, but I haveconsistently put myself in places throughout my life
where I am out of place.So I don't know. Maybe I'm trying
(17:08):
to figure out where I belong ormaybe I don't belong anywhere, or maybe
I belong everywhere, but um,I just kind of wanted to share that
with you and you know, giveme a little insight about who I am
and really think about you know,who you who you are, right,
because I think it's just easy toforget some of those core, you know,
pillars of who we are as aperson, like founding the Multicultural Awareness
(17:32):
Committee, like you know, whodid that? Nobody's told me to do
that. My parents were so disconnectedfrom me, you know, because I
grew so fast and shit, andI don't even know if I told you
all that story, but you know, I look like a five year old
by the time I was two.Is everybody talk to me like I was
a forty year old since I wasthree years old? And you know,
(17:53):
it's just, um, it's adifferent it's a different time. It's a
different time. Anyway, I thinkthis is enough for one episode. I
just really wanted to reach out andsay, you know, if you're listening,
thank you. I hope you likethe new format. I hope that
you're cool with this different journey thatI'm heading on, just sharing like my
(18:14):
truth and the things that I'm thinkingabout. And of course there'll be some
business stuff in there, because Ispend a lot of my time thinking about
that stuff, and so when Ihave these realizations, I'm going to share
them with you. But I'm hopingto take some of the pressure off this
new format and feeling the more consistent, and share some more of my beautiful
yard that I love so much,and hopefully give you guys a little break.
(18:37):
And maybe the bird sounds and thejungle noises are a little intrusive on
the podcast, or maybe I'm comingin hot like MPR, but either way,
I really appreciate you hanging out withme and listening to this podcast and
showing me some love. So Ihope you guys have a fantastic day and
yeah, man, be good,I'll catch them. Hey, thanks for
(19:03):
tuning in to the podcast today.I know your time is valuable and you
could spend it in any way,but you chose to spend it with me
today, so thank you for that. If there's anything I can do to
help you or your business or justhave a conversation, I'm here. Hit
me up on my website. Thanksagain, have a great day. Produced
by Heartcast Media
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