December 14, 2022 • 20 mins
It’s definitely not what you think, thats for sure. If you told me 3 years ago I would be living here I am not sure I would have believed you. It’s crazy how much life can change in such a short time. Getting robbed wasn’t on my bucket list, but I live to tell the tale so there’s that.
I always knew I wanted to live somewhere different. It had to be somewhere outside of my comfort zone. I don’t think that I would have realized Costa Rica was for me. It's crazy how much life can change in such a short time.
Quote
“Making a big life change is pretty scary. But know what’s even scarier? Regret.” – Zig Ziglar
Sponsored by Heartcast Media
https://www.heartcastmedia.com/
Highlights
00:00 Introduction
00:43 Why I move to Costa Rica
01:23 Pandemic changes everything
02:10 How beautiful Pura Vida
03:25 Experiencing home invasion
07:39 Neighborhood in Costa Rica
16:43 Life is long and fast
19:53 Conclusion
Book a Discovery Call: https://calendly.com/mollyruland/discovery-chat-molly-ruland
If you are interested one on one business consultation click here:
https://mollyruland.com/coaching/
I always knew I wanted to live somewhere different. It had to be somewhere outside of my comfort zone. I don’t think that I would have realized Costa Rica was for me. It's crazy how much life can change in such a short time.
Quote
“Making a big life change is pretty scary. But know what’s even scarier? Regret.” – Zig Ziglar
Sponsored by Heartcast Media
https://www.heartcastmedia.com/
Highlights
00:00 Introduction
00:43 Why I move to Costa Rica
01:23 Pandemic changes everything
02:10 How beautiful Pura Vida
03:25 Experiencing home invasion
07:39 Neighborhood in Costa Rica
16:43 Life is long and fast
19:53 Conclusion
Book a Discovery Call: https://calendly.com/mollyruland/discovery-chat-molly-ruland
If you are interested one on one business consultation click here:
https://mollyruland.com/coaching/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:10):
Welcome back to the next one hundred. It's me. It's Molly. I'm
back. Thanks for joining me.It is getting pretty cold out there,
even in Costa Rica. I meanthat means it's like seventy one and not
seventy four. But it feels cold. I don't expect you to feel bad
for me, but it does feelcold. I'm even wearing a kind of
(00:31):
like a cozy sweater today. So, you know, I've been thinking a
lot about, you know, whyI'm doing this podcast and what the point
is and what kind of content wouldbe valuable. And I realized that I
don't really talk about my journey toCosta Rica that much. And I think
because well, it was a littlebit painful, to be honest, you
(00:54):
know, I didn't leave within themost exciting of circumstances, you know,
pandemic and relationship with my mom.There there was a lot going on.
I was excited to come here,and I was always a plan, but
it was like a retirement plan.It wasn't a right now plan. And
everything kind of changed, right,you know it, I don't know,
(01:18):
everything sort of changed, and welleverything didn't sort of change. Everything completely
changed in the pandemic, right howwe did business, where we did business,
where I was living, where Iwanted to live, what I thought
was possible, what wasn't possible.All of that got completely tipped on its
axis. And I found an opportunityto go to Costa Rica and I took
it. And three weeks after Igot here, I was drugged and robbed
(01:42):
in a home invasion. And Ididn't do anything to deserve it. I
know people are thinking, who wouldsay that? Lots of people. I
didn't go to any bars, Iused the same taxi driver, I didn't
have any interactions with anybody. Theyliterally were just waiting for me to move.
And it's a really big problem inCosta Rica. There's a lot of
home invasions all the time. Honestly, you know, I love Costa Rica
(02:07):
and it didn't make me want toleave. But Costa Rica's got a great
pr campaign and Pure Life Puavida isabsolutely accurate. I mean there's two cans
flying by and beautiful birds, andI mean just the flowers that I'm looking
in my yard right now, andthere's a volcano and a lake. I
(02:27):
mean, it's just unreal. It'sabsolutely unreal how beautiful it is, and
so Puavida is a very accurate statement, but it's also Central America and it
can be dangerous, and people don'treally like to talk about that because it
shatters their dream of this utopia thatthey banked on. And so when you
rattle that cage a little bit,people get really defensive and they don't want
(02:50):
to talk about it, and sonobody really tells you what's happening. You
kind of have to get here andfigure it out. But at the end
of the day, when you're movingto another country where you don't speak the
language and everything is different, whetherit's a developing country or not, it
doesn't matter. You are a guesthere or a guest there, and you
should kind of act accordingly and justnot be shocked or surprised or appalled by
(03:10):
anything. Because the whole reason whyI left is because I wanted something different,
and boy did I get it.And you know, how did that
happen? People ask me this alot. I left one of my one
of those like slotted windows like yourgrandma had on her breezeway, Like you
(03:34):
know, are they having Florida whereyou like like rigg a little crank And
I had one of those and Iused to turn the AC on every night
and close everything up. Otherwise everybug and the whole town would have been
in my living room. And soI would close it up every night and
turn on the AC as soon asthe sun went down. But apparently I
left this one window opened, andso at one forty in the morning,
they came through the window and itwas three men. They approached the house.
(03:59):
They like shine their flashlights at thesecurity cameras. I have all the
footage in case you're wondering how effectivesecurity cameras are. And they got through
the window and then they came tothe house and then they blew horse tranquilizer
in our faces. I had twofriends from DC visiting and literally knocked us
(04:19):
out while we were sleeping. Andwhat it does is it just keeps you
asleep and you wake up with aheadache and all your ship is gone.
And so they were in my bedroom. They were in my house for almost
an hour, and I have norecollection of it. I have no memory
of it. And it's really impossibleto defend yourself when you're sleeping, especially
(04:39):
when you've been drugged. And soit was a lot, you know,
it was a lot. It wasa really difficult thing. But I'm one
of those people to just always survives. And then later on in retrospect,
I'm like, damn, that wassuper fucked, And that's kind of one
of those moments. I was moreconcerned with my friend and who are visiting
(05:00):
and feeling bad, and I justget into like survival mode. I've had
so many surgeries and so much painin my life, and I just get
into survival mode. And so Ijust dealt with it. And you know,
the cops showed up, and well, we called them and they didn't
show up, so we called themagain, and then they showed up,
guns blazing, you know, bigbig guns, fingers only trigger pointing them
at us. They thought we werethe robbers, you know, And so
(05:25):
you know, I'm in in mykitchen. I'm totally just I'm just all
shook up, trying to figure shitout. There's two cops in my kitchen.
They're speaking Spanish with my landlord.I don't understand anything that's being said.
All I see is that they stillgot their finger on the triggers for
like twenty minutes. And all ofthat was a lot, you know,
(05:46):
that was a lot, But atno point did it ever make me feel
like I regretted my decision to movehere, And it didn't make me feel
any differently about tikos. You know, it pisses me off a little bit
when people say crime happens everywhe Yeah, no shit, such a fucking stupid
thing in stay to somebody. Ofcourse it does, right, But it's
the crime, you know, right, it's the devil, you know.
(06:09):
And you know in DC, nobody'scoming through your window like that. You
know what I'm saying? Hell no, man, there you get shot.
You know, you might get shoton your front door step. You might
get mugged right on your own frontporch, my friend, But inside your
house is relatively safe and so um. But what it did is it rattled
(06:31):
my sense of security and well being. And I did a bunch of therapy
and you know, ate a bunchof mushrooms and got my head right.
You know, if that offends you, read a book, but I did.
Whenever I took to get things rightand I and I felt much better
(06:53):
and I still do. But it'scrazy how every time I look back,
I think to myself, man,I'm better than I was too months ago.
And it's been like that for ayear, you know, almost two
years. Fuck, it's been almosttwo years. I moved to Costa Rica
January twenty eight, twenty twenty one. No, yeah, twenty twenty one,
(07:14):
so it wasn't even a full yearinto the pandemic. And so now
I'm coming up on my two yearanniversary, and so it's wild to think
that this stuff still affects me,right, And there's been some crime lately
in home invasions in the general region, so it's sort of triggering all that
again. But at the end ofthe day, man, you know,
that's life, right, Like,we gotta make choices, you know.
(07:35):
The flip side is I live inthis beautiful place, and I live in
this amazing community full of people whogenuinely seemed to actually care about me and
you know, look out for meand check in on me. And I've
never felt more like supported or appreciateit. And don't get me wrong,
(07:56):
in DC, there's a lot ofpeople who love me and I love them.
But do you see, is hardand everybody's just trying to survive,
and here everything slows down a littlebit. You know, people ask me
what's it like living in Costa Rica. Well, when you're a business owner.
You spend a lot of some ofyour computers. It was just sort
of like having a really fancy zoombackground that's real, like that ship right
there. But you know, it'svery quiet. It's very quiet other than
(08:24):
the birds and the monkeys and thecows and the donkey and they back up
in there. It's a donkey.But it's quiet here. And you have
a lot of time for self reflection, a lot, And there are so
many moments. It's like when youend a bad relationship and you're like sweeping
(08:45):
and then you remember, oh mygod, something they do and you're like,
god, how did you not seethat? Right? Well, Costa
Rica is like that, but forself reflection, you get all this time
to think about the things that's happenedin your life, the thing that you
did, things that are your fault, things you could have done better on
things, you know. And andfor me, it's not even like what
happened to me, you know,or who wrong? No, it's not
(09:09):
about it's about me. It's aboutmoments recognizing like in my old company where
I was just a shit ass leader. Oh god, you know, even
now a couple of weeks ago,I'm sure, I could pull an example
in the last month where I wasa shit ass leader A man. I'm
really trying, you know, butgosh, just this quiet time gives you
so much time to reflect, andsometimes it give me too much time.
(09:33):
Right, So there's a balance there. I'm I'm curious how other people navigate
that stuff, because I think sometimeswhen you take when you're in therapy for
too much, you now need goevery week. It's like, sometimes I'm
in a good mood and then Igo retrigger a bunch of childhood trauma and
I'm like, bro, it's Tuesday. I got work to do. I
can't afford to be this messed upevery week. But sometimes you really got
(09:56):
to do that. And so there'sa balance there, right, there's a
I'm trying to figure all that out. But Costa Rica is just such a
beautiful place and it really brings everythingback, you know. Like I have
a doctor, like a local doctorwho I can text on WhatsApp and ask
her for information or advice or tellher about my health. And I have,
you know, all this amazing community, and I have great friends.
(10:18):
You know. People say it's reallyhard to make friends as an adult,
but I think, you know,I think it's what you focus on,
right, because if you're looking forfriends who are exactly like you, who
feel the same way about you,who voted for the same person as you,
and have the same beliefs and believein the same god and da da
dada, well you're gonna have ahard time making friends. And the thing
(10:41):
about Costa Rica is that it doesn'tmatter. None of that shit matters.
Like there's a certain type of personthat leaves everything that they know and moves
here. There's a certain type ofperson who's like, I'm totally down to
live in a development country and liveoff a dirt road and like, do
that right. It's a different kindof person, And it doesn't matter who
they voted for. It doesn't matterif they're Republican or demor it doesn't none
(11:05):
of that matters. And it's coolhow quickly all that stuff kind of fades
here, because you know, ifyour dog gets like bites one of them
toads and has a seizure, yourneighbor is gonna help you. What are
you gonna say, Oh, I'mexcuse me, who did you vote for?
Or I'm sorry, but you're notusing the right words, or you're
not being politically correct, or you'reoffending me, because no, man,
(11:28):
that doesn't exist here. You know, nobody's policing each other's language. It's
just people are here surviving and relatingto each other and sharing stories and being
good community members. And I thinkthere's such a big lesson there and what
does that look like? And it'sit's easy for me to say to tune
out of all of those those thingsbecause I don't live in the United States,
(11:52):
you know, And that's just thereality of it. I'm not a
United States haters to miss me withthat. I just I traveled all of
the United States a whole bunch oftime, drove across country so many times.
I've lived in California, I've livedin New York, I lived in
Boston, i lived you know whatI'm saying, I've lived all over the
United States. Is cool, butI'm over it. I want to see
some new stuff. In Costa Ricais a great home base for me because
(12:13):
then it affords me the opportunity totravel to other places and live a more
affordable life and not be in thematrix, you know. And I mean
I'm still in it. Don't getme wrong, but I'm not in it
in it, and so you don'trealize how that your body is in fight
(12:35):
or flight mode all the time.Living in the United States, you don't
You honestly don't realize it until youcome someplace like this and you're like,
oh, fuck, it is soquiet, and like I said, a
lot of self reflection. But whatit is is not there's a lot of
noise. There's not even a lotof advertisements. You know, there's not
(12:56):
even my Unfortunately, you know whohas billboards in this country, White people
who come here and sell real estate. Y'all need to cut that shit out.
Nobody needs to see your fucking gringoface on a huge billboard, messing
up the scenery. They're all illegal. Anyway, I'll end my rant there.
But there's not even a lot ofsignage here, and so it's just
really quiet. And then in theUnited States, it's like everything even on
(13:18):
ways, they're popping up, Hey, Starbucks is coming up like it's it's
a pressure cooker. And I'm remindedof that when I'm reading the you know,
Morning Brew or the associated press ofthe Little Morning Digests, and I'm
just skimming through the headlines. Everyonce while I make mistake like clicking on
one of the length and I canliterally feel my blood pressure glub. I
(13:39):
can literally feel myself like physically reactingto what I'm reading, and it just
reminds me of how I was thereall the time. I just lived there,
and now I live here, andit just spikes up. It spikes
because it's stress because of hell.Because but I'm I'm I'm I'm baseline,
you know what I'm saying. Andthen some of that news comes in or
(14:03):
somebody new moves into town and they'restill all keyed up about vaccines or whatever,
and they're bringing all his energy andit's like, whoa man, I'm
like the ultimate. I'm like,well man, watch your energy, bro.
But for real, like, noneof us moved here for that,
and I appreciate that. And sothe community that I have found and built
(14:26):
and been gifted here by moving intothis neighborhood in particular, is such an
incredible gift. And I think Thanksgivingreally gave me an opportunity to really reflect
on that and appreciate where I'm at. But yeah, man, living in
Costa Rica, you know, ifyou have any inklind Of doing it,
(14:48):
like, come on with it,then, man, come here, come
for a month, get an airbnb, spend the money, what sublet your
own place, whatever, and comelive here. For you can't decide if
you want to live in Costa Ricacoming for a week. First of all,
it takes forever to get anywhere here, so you're like, oh,
it's only forty miles. Yeah,that forty mile a going to take you
two hours, So don't get ittwisted. Everything takes longer. So if
(15:09):
you actually want to see Costa Rica, you need like three weeks maybe even
longer to not just be like gogo, go go. But there's only
a few central areas of central ValleySan Jose, I don't know, or
like the beach regions or like thesouthern you know, people live in the
Osa Peninsula and down there, butit's it's like way more remote, so
(15:30):
there's not all that many places.But I just my point is I encourage
you to do that. If that'swhat you want to do, you should
do that. And because life movesfast, you know, And my biggest
the thing that was just echoing throughmy head is that you know, life
miss fast, and I want tomake the next twenty of the Best twenty
(15:54):
because it might be the only twentyI got, and quite frankly, that
was twenty aren't even guaranteed. IfI keep how any is issue, I
might fall out any day, youknow what I'm saying. So just know
I died happy. If the podcastcomes to an abrupt end, you know
why. But that was really fuckingmorbid. But the point is anything is
possible. But if I'm gonna beon this planet, I want to spend
(16:15):
the rest of my time looking atbeautiful things. And that's the commitment I
made to myself. And that's whyI live where I live, with this
beautiful scenery behind me and all aroundme, And it's why I make the
sacrifices to be here and to bea little more isolated, but also feel
more connected than I've ever felt.I mean, it's not like I'm old
man winner up on this mountain.I got good people in this neighborhood,
(16:36):
you know. And but life happensfast, man. And you know,
if you wonder what it's gonna belike, take a look at your parents,
you know, can they you know, it's like he finally gets that
retirement age and your knees suck andyou can't do all the things you want
to do. And I don't.I don't. I don't want to blink
my eyes and wake up again andto think to myself, Man, I
(16:59):
miss it again, I miss mylast sprint. And yeah, there's people
that live to be eighty and nighteven a hundred, especially around here there's
a blue zone. They're literally famousfor people living a long time. But
I think I came in at thedeficits. I don't have high expectations.
But life, life is fast,man. And you know, one of
my friends likes to quote me becauseone time he said life is short and
(17:22):
I said, no, man,life is long, and he just laughed
at me, but I said,no, really, when when you're not
happy, life is long. Lifeis hard. Days are long when you're
not happy, when you're depressed,when you're not moving, when you're stagnant,
you're sitting in your own shit.Life is long and hard and arduous.
But when you're feeling good and you'redoing the things you're supposed to do,
(17:45):
days go by and you're feeling betterand you're accountable to yourself, that's
when life is good. And that'swhen life is short. You know that's
when life is short. So youknow, embrace it and don't be afraid,
because you know, people say tome all the time, all you're
so brave. I'm not brave movingto Costa Rica. I just did it,
(18:06):
Okay, bravery's running into a building, sacrificing my life for the betterment
of others. I sacrificed my discomfortfor the betterment of myself. I am
not brave, you know, bold, dumb maybe, but brave. No.
And I do it again. Ido it again in a hot second,
even if I had to get brokeninto it again, I'd do it
(18:27):
again because you know what, it'sworth it and I'm so grateful for this
time and I'm excited for what's next. So if part of the reason why
you're listening to this podcast is becauseyou're curious about me and the fact that
I live in Costa Rica, letme know. I'll tell you more Costa
Rica stuff. It's pretty cool.I think the reason why I haven't been
doing that is because I got reallyspooked about the break in and I became
(18:49):
very uncomfortable with talking about where Ilive, or showing where I live,
or just even I don't even knowPTSD isn't Mickey Flicky, y'alls. I'm
doing my best, but this littlebit more about me, a little bit
more personal, and uh, youknow, I think there's a lot of
women listening to podcast who own businessesand I really like that and I really
(19:11):
want to help, and so ifI can do that, that's what I
want to do. That's what Iwant to. If I'm an inspiration to
you in any way, shape orform, then that's awesome. Man.
You know, I feel like adouchebag saying that, but whatever. If
me moving to Costa Rica makes youfeel like, you know, what,
fuck it, I'm gonna do thething that I've been wanting to do too,
then that's awesome. And I thinkyou should do it, and I
(19:33):
think you should tell me about it, because man, that's what life is
all about. So this episode isalready a little bit too long, but
I figured, you know, thisis who I am, and this is
what's happening, and this is what'shappened to me. So sometimes I'm gonna
check out a little bit and that'sokay too. But here I am.
Thanks for taking time to listen tome and appreciating me speaking my truth.
(19:55):
And I hope it's I hope itmakes you want to take the next step
in your life. And hey,if you end up a coast break and
you better hit me up for sure. We gotta hang out and have an
imperial. So on that note,have a good one, be good to
each other, and I'll catch youon the flip side. Thank you for
tuning into the next one hundred.Sponsored by heartcast Media. We are a
(20:19):
digital media creative agency focusing on branding, marketing strategy and amplification for personal branding
to podcasting. We've got you coveredand to continue this conversation, join me
on Instagram. My personal account isMolly d Ruined and of course you can
also refine us at heartcast Media.That's where the really good stuff is going
(20:40):
down. So join me there.Let's continue the conversation and until next week,
have a good one. Produced byheartcast Media.
Welcome back to the next one hundred. It's me. It's Molly. I'm
back. Thanks for joining me.It is getting pretty cold out there,
even in Costa Rica. I meanthat means it's like seventy one and not
seventy four. But it feels cold. I don't expect you to feel bad
for me, but it does feelcold. I'm even wearing a kind of
(00:31):
like a cozy sweater today. So, you know, I've been thinking a
lot about, you know, whyI'm doing this podcast and what the point
is and what kind of content wouldbe valuable. And I realized that I
don't really talk about my journey toCosta Rica that much. And I think
because well, it was a littlebit painful, to be honest, you
(00:54):
know, I didn't leave within themost exciting of circumstances, you know,
pandemic and relationship with my mom.There there was a lot going on.
I was excited to come here,and I was always a plan, but
it was like a retirement plan.It wasn't a right now plan. And
everything kind of changed, right,you know it, I don't know,
(01:18):
everything sort of changed, and welleverything didn't sort of change. Everything completely
changed in the pandemic, right howwe did business, where we did business,
where I was living, where Iwanted to live, what I thought
was possible, what wasn't possible.All of that got completely tipped on its
axis. And I found an opportunityto go to Costa Rica and I took
it. And three weeks after Igot here, I was drugged and robbed
(01:42):
in a home invasion. And Ididn't do anything to deserve it. I
know people are thinking, who wouldsay that? Lots of people. I
didn't go to any bars, Iused the same taxi driver, I didn't
have any interactions with anybody. Theyliterally were just waiting for me to move.
And it's a really big problem inCosta Rica. There's a lot of
home invasions all the time. Honestly, you know, I love Costa Rica
(02:07):
and it didn't make me want toleave. But Costa Rica's got a great
pr campaign and Pure Life Puavida isabsolutely accurate. I mean there's two cans
flying by and beautiful birds, andI mean just the flowers that I'm looking
in my yard right now, andthere's a volcano and a lake. I
(02:27):
mean, it's just unreal. It'sabsolutely unreal how beautiful it is, and
so Puavida is a very accurate statement, but it's also Central America and it
can be dangerous, and people don'treally like to talk about that because it
shatters their dream of this utopia thatthey banked on. And so when you
rattle that cage a little bit,people get really defensive and they don't want
(02:50):
to talk about it, and sonobody really tells you what's happening. You
kind of have to get here andfigure it out. But at the end
of the day, when you're movingto another country where you don't speak the
language and everything is different, whetherit's a developing country or not, it
doesn't matter. You are a guesthere or a guest there, and you
should kind of act accordingly and justnot be shocked or surprised or appalled by
(03:10):
anything. Because the whole reason whyI left is because I wanted something different,
and boy did I get it.And you know, how did that
happen? People ask me this alot. I left one of my one
of those like slotted windows like yourgrandma had on her breezeway, Like you
(03:34):
know, are they having Florida whereyou like like rigg a little crank And
I had one of those and Iused to turn the AC on every night
and close everything up. Otherwise everybug and the whole town would have been
in my living room. And soI would close it up every night and
turn on the AC as soon asthe sun went down. But apparently I
left this one window opened, andso at one forty in the morning,
they came through the window and itwas three men. They approached the house.
(03:59):
They like shine their flashlights at thesecurity cameras. I have all the
footage in case you're wondering how effectivesecurity cameras are. And they got through
the window and then they came tothe house and then they blew horse tranquilizer
in our faces. I had twofriends from DC visiting and literally knocked us
(04:19):
out while we were sleeping. Andwhat it does is it just keeps you
asleep and you wake up with aheadache and all your ship is gone.
And so they were in my bedroom. They were in my house for almost
an hour, and I have norecollection of it. I have no memory
of it. And it's really impossibleto defend yourself when you're sleeping, especially
(04:39):
when you've been drugged. And soit was a lot, you know,
it was a lot. It wasa really difficult thing. But I'm one
of those people to just always survives. And then later on in retrospect,
I'm like, damn, that wassuper fucked, And that's kind of one
of those moments. I was moreconcerned with my friend and who are visiting
(05:00):
and feeling bad, and I justget into like survival mode. I've had
so many surgeries and so much painin my life, and I just get
into survival mode. And so Ijust dealt with it. And you know,
the cops showed up, and well, we called them and they didn't
show up, so we called themagain, and then they showed up,
guns blazing, you know, bigbig guns, fingers only trigger pointing them
at us. They thought we werethe robbers, you know, And so
(05:25):
you know, I'm in in mykitchen. I'm totally just I'm just all
shook up, trying to figure shitout. There's two cops in my kitchen.
They're speaking Spanish with my landlord.I don't understand anything that's being said.
All I see is that they stillgot their finger on the triggers for
like twenty minutes. And all ofthat was a lot, you know,
(05:46):
that was a lot, But atno point did it ever make me feel
like I regretted my decision to movehere, And it didn't make me feel
any differently about tikos. You know, it pisses me off a little bit
when people say crime happens everywhe Yeah, no shit, such a fucking stupid
thing in stay to somebody. Ofcourse it does, right, But it's
the crime, you know, right, it's the devil, you know.
(06:09):
And you know in DC, nobody'scoming through your window like that. You
know what I'm saying? Hell no, man, there you get shot.
You know, you might get shoton your front door step. You might
get mugged right on your own frontporch, my friend, But inside your
house is relatively safe and so um. But what it did is it rattled
(06:31):
my sense of security and well being. And I did a bunch of therapy
and you know, ate a bunchof mushrooms and got my head right.
You know, if that offends you, read a book, but I did.
Whenever I took to get things rightand I and I felt much better
(06:53):
and I still do. But it'scrazy how every time I look back,
I think to myself, man,I'm better than I was too months ago.
And it's been like that for ayear, you know, almost two
years. Fuck, it's been almosttwo years. I moved to Costa Rica
January twenty eight, twenty twenty one. No, yeah, twenty twenty one,
(07:14):
so it wasn't even a full yearinto the pandemic. And so now
I'm coming up on my two yearanniversary, and so it's wild to think
that this stuff still affects me,right, And there's been some crime lately
in home invasions in the general region, so it's sort of triggering all that
again. But at the end ofthe day, man, you know,
that's life, right, Like,we gotta make choices, you know.
(07:35):
The flip side is I live inthis beautiful place, and I live in
this amazing community full of people whogenuinely seemed to actually care about me and
you know, look out for meand check in on me. And I've
never felt more like supported or appreciateit. And don't get me wrong,
(07:56):
in DC, there's a lot ofpeople who love me and I love them.
But do you see, is hardand everybody's just trying to survive,
and here everything slows down a littlebit. You know, people ask me
what's it like living in Costa Rica. Well, when you're a business owner.
You spend a lot of some ofyour computers. It was just sort
of like having a really fancy zoombackground that's real, like that ship right
there. But you know, it'svery quiet. It's very quiet other than
(08:24):
the birds and the monkeys and thecows and the donkey and they back up
in there. It's a donkey.But it's quiet here. And you have
a lot of time for self reflection, a lot, And there are so
many moments. It's like when youend a bad relationship and you're like sweeping
(08:45):
and then you remember, oh mygod, something they do and you're like,
god, how did you not seethat? Right? Well, Costa
Rica is like that, but forself reflection, you get all this time
to think about the things that's happenedin your life, the thing that you
did, things that are your fault, things you could have done better on
things, you know. And andfor me, it's not even like what
happened to me, you know,or who wrong? No, it's not
(09:09):
about it's about me. It's aboutmoments recognizing like in my old company where
I was just a shit ass leader. Oh god, you know, even
now a couple of weeks ago,I'm sure, I could pull an example
in the last month where I wasa shit ass leader A man. I'm
really trying, you know, butgosh, just this quiet time gives you
so much time to reflect, andsometimes it give me too much time.
(09:33):
Right, So there's a balance there. I'm I'm curious how other people navigate
that stuff, because I think sometimeswhen you take when you're in therapy for
too much, you now need goevery week. It's like, sometimes I'm
in a good mood and then Igo retrigger a bunch of childhood trauma and
I'm like, bro, it's Tuesday. I got work to do. I
can't afford to be this messed upevery week. But sometimes you really got
(09:56):
to do that. And so there'sa balance there, right, there's a
I'm trying to figure all that out. But Costa Rica is just such a
beautiful place and it really brings everythingback, you know. Like I have
a doctor, like a local doctorwho I can text on WhatsApp and ask
her for information or advice or tellher about my health. And I have,
you know, all this amazing community, and I have great friends.
(10:18):
You know. People say it's reallyhard to make friends as an adult,
but I think, you know,I think it's what you focus on,
right, because if you're looking forfriends who are exactly like you, who
feel the same way about you,who voted for the same person as you,
and have the same beliefs and believein the same god and da da
dada, well you're gonna have ahard time making friends. And the thing
(10:41):
about Costa Rica is that it doesn'tmatter. None of that shit matters.
Like there's a certain type of personthat leaves everything that they know and moves
here. There's a certain type ofperson who's like, I'm totally down to
live in a development country and liveoff a dirt road and like, do
that right. It's a different kindof person, And it doesn't matter who
they voted for. It doesn't matterif they're Republican or demor it doesn't none
(11:05):
of that matters. And it's coolhow quickly all that stuff kind of fades
here, because you know, ifyour dog gets like bites one of them
toads and has a seizure, yourneighbor is gonna help you. What are
you gonna say, Oh, I'mexcuse me, who did you vote for?
Or I'm sorry, but you're notusing the right words, or you're
not being politically correct, or you'reoffending me, because no, man,
(11:28):
that doesn't exist here. You know, nobody's policing each other's language. It's
just people are here surviving and relatingto each other and sharing stories and being
good community members. And I thinkthere's such a big lesson there and what
does that look like? And it'sit's easy for me to say to tune
out of all of those those thingsbecause I don't live in the United States,
(11:52):
you know, And that's just thereality of it. I'm not a
United States haters to miss me withthat. I just I traveled all of
the United States a whole bunch oftime, drove across country so many times.
I've lived in California, I've livedin New York, I lived in
Boston, i lived you know whatI'm saying, I've lived all over the
United States. Is cool, butI'm over it. I want to see
some new stuff. In Costa Ricais a great home base for me because
(12:13):
then it affords me the opportunity totravel to other places and live a more
affordable life and not be in thematrix, you know. And I mean
I'm still in it. Don't getme wrong, but I'm not in it
in it, and so you don'trealize how that your body is in fight
(12:35):
or flight mode all the time.Living in the United States, you don't
You honestly don't realize it until youcome someplace like this and you're like,
oh, fuck, it is soquiet, and like I said, a
lot of self reflection. But whatit is is not there's a lot of
noise. There's not even a lotof advertisements. You know, there's not
(12:56):
even my Unfortunately, you know whohas billboards in this country, White people
who come here and sell real estate. Y'all need to cut that shit out.
Nobody needs to see your fucking gringoface on a huge billboard, messing
up the scenery. They're all illegal. Anyway, I'll end my rant there.
But there's not even a lot ofsignage here, and so it's just
really quiet. And then in theUnited States, it's like everything even on
(13:18):
ways, they're popping up, Hey, Starbucks is coming up like it's it's
a pressure cooker. And I'm remindedof that when I'm reading the you know,
Morning Brew or the associated press ofthe Little Morning Digests, and I'm
just skimming through the headlines. Everyonce while I make mistake like clicking on
one of the length and I canliterally feel my blood pressure glub. I
(13:39):
can literally feel myself like physically reactingto what I'm reading, and it just
reminds me of how I was thereall the time. I just lived there,
and now I live here, andit just spikes up. It spikes
because it's stress because of hell.Because but I'm I'm I'm I'm baseline,
you know what I'm saying. Andthen some of that news comes in or
(14:03):
somebody new moves into town and they'restill all keyed up about vaccines or whatever,
and they're bringing all his energy andit's like, whoa man, I'm
like the ultimate. I'm like,well man, watch your energy, bro.
But for real, like, noneof us moved here for that,
and I appreciate that. And sothe community that I have found and built
(14:26):
and been gifted here by moving intothis neighborhood in particular, is such an
incredible gift. And I think Thanksgivingreally gave me an opportunity to really reflect
on that and appreciate where I'm at. But yeah, man, living in
Costa Rica, you know, ifyou have any inklind Of doing it,
(14:48):
like, come on with it,then, man, come here, come
for a month, get an airbnb, spend the money, what sublet your
own place, whatever, and comelive here. For you can't decide if
you want to live in Costa Ricacoming for a week. First of all,
it takes forever to get anywhere here, so you're like, oh,
it's only forty miles. Yeah,that forty mile a going to take you
two hours, So don't get ittwisted. Everything takes longer. So if
(15:09):
you actually want to see Costa Rica, you need like three weeks maybe even
longer to not just be like gogo, go go. But there's only
a few central areas of central ValleySan Jose, I don't know, or
like the beach regions or like thesouthern you know, people live in the
Osa Peninsula and down there, butit's it's like way more remote, so
(15:30):
there's not all that many places.But I just my point is I encourage
you to do that. If that'swhat you want to do, you should
do that. And because life movesfast, you know, And my biggest
the thing that was just echoing throughmy head is that you know, life
miss fast, and I want tomake the next twenty of the Best twenty
(15:54):
because it might be the only twentyI got, and quite frankly, that
was twenty aren't even guaranteed. IfI keep how any is issue, I
might fall out any day, youknow what I'm saying. So just know
I died happy. If the podcastcomes to an abrupt end, you know
why. But that was really fuckingmorbid. But the point is anything is
possible. But if I'm gonna beon this planet, I want to spend
(16:15):
the rest of my time looking atbeautiful things. And that's the commitment I
made to myself. And that's whyI live where I live, with this
beautiful scenery behind me and all aroundme, And it's why I make the
sacrifices to be here and to bea little more isolated, but also feel
more connected than I've ever felt.I mean, it's not like I'm old
man winner up on this mountain.I got good people in this neighborhood,
(16:36):
you know. And but life happensfast, man. And you know,
if you wonder what it's gonna belike, take a look at your parents,
you know, can they you know, it's like he finally gets that
retirement age and your knees suck andyou can't do all the things you want
to do. And I don't.I don't. I don't want to blink
my eyes and wake up again andto think to myself, Man, I
(16:59):
miss it again, I miss mylast sprint. And yeah, there's people
that live to be eighty and nighteven a hundred, especially around here there's
a blue zone. They're literally famousfor people living a long time. But
I think I came in at thedeficits. I don't have high expectations.
But life, life is fast,man. And you know, one of
my friends likes to quote me becauseone time he said life is short and
(17:22):
I said, no, man,life is long, and he just laughed
at me, but I said,no, really, when when you're not
happy, life is long. Lifeis hard. Days are long when you're
not happy, when you're depressed,when you're not moving, when you're stagnant,
you're sitting in your own shit.Life is long and hard and arduous.
But when you're feeling good and you'redoing the things you're supposed to do,
(17:45):
days go by and you're feeling betterand you're accountable to yourself, that's
when life is good. And that'swhen life is short. You know that's
when life is short. So youknow, embrace it and don't be afraid,
because you know, people say tome all the time, all you're
so brave. I'm not brave movingto Costa Rica. I just did it,
(18:06):
Okay, bravery's running into a building, sacrificing my life for the betterment
of others. I sacrificed my discomfortfor the betterment of myself. I am
not brave, you know, bold, dumb maybe, but brave. No.
And I do it again. Ido it again in a hot second,
even if I had to get brokeninto it again, I'd do it
(18:27):
again because you know what, it'sworth it and I'm so grateful for this
time and I'm excited for what's next. So if part of the reason why
you're listening to this podcast is becauseyou're curious about me and the fact that
I live in Costa Rica, letme know. I'll tell you more Costa
Rica stuff. It's pretty cool.I think the reason why I haven't been
doing that is because I got reallyspooked about the break in and I became
(18:49):
very uncomfortable with talking about where Ilive, or showing where I live,
or just even I don't even knowPTSD isn't Mickey Flicky, y'alls. I'm
doing my best, but this littlebit more about me, a little bit
more personal, and uh, youknow, I think there's a lot of
women listening to podcast who own businessesand I really like that and I really
(19:11):
want to help, and so ifI can do that, that's what I
want to do. That's what Iwant to. If I'm an inspiration to
you in any way, shape orform, then that's awesome. Man.
You know, I feel like adouchebag saying that, but whatever. If
me moving to Costa Rica makes youfeel like, you know, what,
fuck it, I'm gonna do thething that I've been wanting to do too,
then that's awesome. And I thinkyou should do it, and I
(19:33):
think you should tell me about it, because man, that's what life is
all about. So this episode isalready a little bit too long, but
I figured, you know, thisis who I am, and this is
what's happening, and this is what'shappened to me. So sometimes I'm gonna
check out a little bit and that'sokay too. But here I am.
Thanks for taking time to listen tome and appreciating me speaking my truth.
(19:55):
And I hope it's I hope itmakes you want to take the next step
in your life. And hey,if you end up a coast break and
you better hit me up for sure. We gotta hang out and have an
imperial. So on that note,have a good one, be good to
each other, and I'll catch youon the flip side. Thank you for
tuning into the next one hundred.Sponsored by heartcast Media. We are a
(20:19):
digital media creative agency focusing on branding, marketing strategy and amplification for personal branding
to podcasting. We've got you coveredand to continue this conversation, join me
on Instagram. My personal account isMolly d Ruined and of course you can
also refine us at heartcast Media.That's where the really good stuff is going
(20:40):
down. So join me there.Let's continue the conversation and until next week,
have a good one. Produced byheartcast Media.
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