August 22, 2022 • 60 mins
The team meets its match - not in terms of power or skill, but in terms of riddles, their most well-known weakness. The Night Shift enters Davoc Goresman’s home, only to find a series of riddles, traps, and theatrics designed to drain them of their patience…and their life.
The Night Shift is an actual-play, homebrew D&D Podcast and Youtube series that features the ridiculous antics of Jay Ducote, T-Bob Hebert, Lindsey Duga, and Chuck Pierce playing Dungeons and Dragons version 5e.
Brought to you by Little Wars (https://littlewars.com/) and Pelican Craft Brands (http://pelicancraftbrands.com/).
SUBSCRIBE: to make sure you see new episodes. REVIEW: to ensure we make more.
Content Warning: This episode contains harsh language, violence, and touches on topics like genocide, abuse, and torture.
Links: https://linktr.ee/TheNightShiftRPG
Music by: Jay Parker
Part of Drop Biscuit Studios
The Night Shift is an actual-play, homebrew D&D Podcast and Youtube series that features the ridiculous antics of Jay Ducote, T-Bob Hebert, Lindsey Duga, and Chuck Pierce playing Dungeons and Dragons version 5e.
Brought to you by Little Wars (https://littlewars.com/) and Pelican Craft Brands (http://pelicancraftbrands.com/).
SUBSCRIBE: to make sure you see new episodes. REVIEW: to ensure we make more.
Content Warning: This episode contains harsh language, violence, and touches on topics like genocide, abuse, and torture.
Links: https://linktr.ee/TheNightShiftRPG
Music by: Jay Parker
Part of Drop Biscuit Studios
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
The Night Shift is a real playD and D video and podcast series for
mature audiences. Content warnings can befound in the episode descriptions Last Time on
the night Shift. I'm just saying, a little steamy pirate romance on the
boat for a few days sounds likea good time. I hear you the
buccaneer in the Babe, I'm pickingup with your boots. Maybe next time
(00:23):
I wasn't doing so much fucking opium, Maybe I could. He got lost
in the soul. Oh my god, I can't scrip together gold. My
souls already sold. Swim you trappedin your spell. I wish you well,
(00:47):
then for creatrun your streets. Youdo better to retreats if you want
it done right, don't huh Anight shift. The Corleon Aisles are as
close as this world has to paradise, not quite heaven, but close enough
(01:07):
to cause confusion. You stand aboardthe swaying deck of the water worm,
waves crashing beneath you against the cedarplanks of the weathered hull. The sun
is shining so brightly that you allfind yourselves squinting, trying to make out
the details of the figure waving atyou. From the island below. But
(01:29):
by his stature, his purple cloak, and his general disposition, he is
unmistakable. It is, of courseDadic Goresman. He turns, smiles,
and slowly strolls to the open doorof his not so humble three story abode.
Palm trees sway in a strong breeze, the salty s air sobering you
(01:49):
almost as much as the sight ofa body jumping dark wizard of untold power.
The rope stairs are unfurled, itsbottom rungs dangling a couple of feet
above the pier, and behind youyou're here? What are he is waiting
for welcome party? Come on,get off my fucking boat, U Jimbo.
I'm very rude of you, said, Am I crazy? Or I
(02:12):
mean I have some sorts of uminstinctual thing telling me your eyes just got
significantly better. Your eyes And thatwas David, right, I could tell
that was David. I knew it. I knew I got a bit cloak.
I knew it. I mean Icould see it when we were over
(02:34):
the island that you can't even theway past the horizon listeners at home,
Uh, just leveled up and gotbetter vision. Significantly better vision. He
can see things from like a mileaway. Yeah, essentially had relax.
Okay, guy, we're going youknow who that is, don't you walk
(02:57):
in there? That's the guy.That's the fucking guy, right, that's
the the you know, the onewe would deliver the furniture. And how
far away away from the shore it'soff. You're like, so this rope
ladder on the side of the shipbasically goes down to the pier and you're
these deep water areas are very pressing. Well, okay, Kestral skips the
ladder entirely, jumps into the oceanand swims through a ship ton of seaweeds.
(03:24):
Wow, looking out deftly, she'smanaged all that, going right through
the swedstegrates in front of me.Because this awesome aura that I'm now unbelievable.
It seems she too, has gainedsome new I have lost control insirely
(03:47):
and immediate eye spy with my eagle, Kestral doesn't seem phased by the unreal
Wow. Wow, yep, areyou seeing this? Yeah? No,
she's like cutting right through the water. We got the seaweed. No,
(04:08):
she's right around, No, I'mright right there. There's a ship ton
of coral in front of me,and I just I'm telling you, it
just dissolves, just dissolves. Okayfor the coral though, that's a reef
in this world everywhere, lots ofreef zavis reef that. Yeah, yeah,
it doesn't right, goodbye then,Lucius. Oh okay, all right,
(04:32):
backflip off the ship. Sure right, that is a you wanted athletics
track. But I get to choose. You get to choose. Okay,
that is going to be as gonnabe a seventeen seventeen Tom. It's a
long drop. Yeah we're talking.But Tom lands kind of like overturned on
(04:58):
his backflip and it helps him littlebit. Yeah, I roll into a
park course style. Yeah, hewas on Glands sort of on his heels
and rolls immediately backwards a few timesand then springs up from a somersault and
dust the gymnast post. I wantto hands out, yes, toast,
hands out, But like you knowwhen like Willy Wonka pulls that forward somersault
and he pops up all nimble bimbley, like it has those vibes strangely,
(05:20):
yes, I do. On thepier. Yeah, he's on the pier.
Okay, Castrill takes a ship tonof seaweed and throws it on him.
Oh Jesus Christ, here so youhit the perfect pose and then see
from the cast what the fuck restedagetation coop cleaned it off. I just
(05:44):
climbed down the rope ladder like anormal person, color flexing so hard on
this, Like hell, you knowyou guys are doing crazy. It's useful,
but you do crazy stuff, allright, Lazi, Just thanks for
the ride, mate, See whatwould you like need to do? Should
(06:05):
I stay? Should I stay out? What you're gonna You're gonna You're just
gonna have. I don't think anythingthat's gonna happen. You should probably stay.
Yeah, you should be fine.It doesn't look like Bill was gonna.
And Bill is like, I'm justgonna stay. I'm just gonna because
that looks oh that look that lookslike like a lot. So I'm gonna
stay. Mate, you don't wantto go talk to the Yeah, well
(06:27):
yes we need you, we needyour blade, all right? Yes,
well what if you stay? Buthe come like reaches around and he grabs
a knife and he's like, youwant me to just throw it to you?
I want you to throw it inDavic's neck. Yeah, in the
neck, um to your trademark,Billy kind of you could we do a
thing where like, um, Igo in the room last you know,
yeah, then yeah, absolutely comeum and then him and Lucia just have
(06:50):
to figure out how to get aneight hundred pound turtle down a ropees wing.
But he's the water. He's nota seed turtle. Tom, Wow,
you're jumps in the water. Ican't think of everything. I don't
(07:12):
tell you. I can't even thinkof most things. What are we doing?
Pinned joining us, Pin stays,I don't need that many mpeces.
Pin stays Bill. Bill will comewith you, Pin will be backin winks
winks. All right. M Soyou step up on this pier and it's
(07:35):
looks like it's newly constructed, verywell constructed, and then what stretches out
in front of you is like thisvery well manicured lawn essentially, and then
a huge I think I described toyou last time, but three story sort
of why but like pretty formidable,uh tower fortress um no windows and one
(08:00):
door that is slightly a jar thefront door in fact, no windows,
no windows, the front door atall. I hear you, You know
what I mean? I think Iprefer the man's ambiance a bit more than
(08:20):
this doesn't seem very welcoming, doesn'tlike I wanted to break into the man's
I was like, you left thedoor open. I feel like that's an
invitation to follow him in. Iknow, and I was funny out the
world works. I almost don't wantto at this point, he's still lawn
or he walked down Yeah, yeah, I know he inside the building.
Um, should we talk about thisat all? Guys? Um some kind
of strategy before we move forward?All right? Group, group, Okay,
(08:43):
group, I would say, thestrategy is your strength. So let's
absolutely. Um do you mean whatare we are? We are we coming
to? When I hear it?How dare you say? Okay, let's
let's yeah, we're gonna have tofight him again? Right, believe that
he's gonna pier was about okay exactly? So what did Haslet tell us about
(09:05):
how to defeat the doc Wizard?Well, we need to get him in
he get him bloody down, yeah, down to like you know, his
last breath. But but he can'tif we basically, if we kill him,
he's just gonna jump bodies, umperform, So we need ritual.
We know that maybe maybe or dowe get maybe if we just go after
(09:30):
his uh medallion, you know whatever, his amulets. Yeah, um,
maybe if we rid him of theamulet, Tom, why don't you get
close to Daddy, put on acostume and seduce him and then dall whoa
the dragon real quick? Seduce him? You know, I'm very confident,
(09:58):
Yeah he does, and have LadyTarris anymore? I don't, I know
I'm coming. I doubt my abilityto sell this to David. I'm willing
to try, but let's maybe havea backup plan just in case ec through
my ruse. I'll start gathering somecoconuts and start stuffing my shirts and whatnot,
and we'll uh coconut kind of workfrom there. Okay, classic coconuts,
(10:20):
find me on the ground and makesome assumptions about his preferences. First
of all, well, I mean, Lady Harris was a female, so
I don't know you could be anhappy man, you don't. You did
talk about a bucks him halfling earlier, so like I'm kind of channeling that
what's her name not bucks hm halfling? She is a halfling. She is
a female, she's probably pretty muscular. Well, she's probably pretty muscular,
(10:41):
so she could be uh like that, you're getting lost here. I'm gonna
grab some coconuts. But what whatwhat mean? Should we be ready to
fight? Here? I take thecourt Lean Isles coin that I have in
my backup holding. I take itout and I does it look any different
now that we're in the Corelean Aisles? Looks the same? No, it
(11:05):
does not look any different. Stillhas Davic engraved on it, so scratched
into it. Uh, guys,this was this was lady Terros's uh ambulet
or her coin that she kept onher with Davik's name on it from the
Corlean Aisles. Kind of what ledus here? Maybe we could boggin with
(11:26):
him, perhaps with this coin,show him that we have it and that
we know how she contained in thatcoin or she We don't know it?
No where I don't believe we lost. Yes, and because this coin was
her way of killed her. Welldump bodies, but no way about making
Davik believe that it's her with Ohwe could we could make Davic think we
(11:52):
are her in one of our bodies. Yes, that's what we're supposed to,
what we're doing. Okay, okay, into tom Bombo. You will
take this coin and with the coconutsthat you have found. Yes, yes,
(12:13):
we will make Yes, we will. We will go in. We
will go in. We will engageDavic and conversation. Yes, we will
talk about how we defeated Lady Tarrosback uh in in uh Hi home,
thank you in Hi home. Atsome point you will pull the havoc aside,
(12:37):
show him the coin and say it'sokay, I jumped bodies, I'm
Lady Tarros. Okay. So inthat scenario, yes, I don't think
I need the coconut booths set right. I mean that's fine. I'm down
because I don't think that's probably theleast convincing parts of my outfit. So
(12:58):
we get rid of those. Ido like the dep I just want to
see you with a coconut knocles,mate, or I mean they do feel
they don't feel great actually quite scratchyum. But but I just I just
crack open a coconut real quick anddrink the coconut milk. So I could
try to take David to the side. Or we maybe we do a thing
(13:18):
where it's like then Lady Terrell's jumpedinto Tom's body and she got to talking
to us, and now we're onyour side, and that's where we came
here, was to uh help herout with you. No. No,
you go in deceiving thinking like we'relike, we're you think your Tom?
Yeah, we think you're Tom,and you're like, I fooled them all
and brought them to you. Iam. I tell you why this is
kind of tricked Davos, because it'salready tricked me. I'm confused. Okay,
(13:41):
no, no, yeah, no, let's see it. Okay,
how any ideas on how to getto me and him alone? Maybe maybe
I'll be I think, well we'llbe able to figure that out while we're
waiting on refreshments or something. Butyeah, I agree, just freestyle plan.
(14:03):
Here's my question though, Once weget him convinced that you're actually Lady
Terris because you have the coin,I'm going to tell him that I must,
then what are we going to do? Is he just gonna say,
all right, the two of younow kill us three and then we I
mean, at some point you're justgonna have to well, you have to
get close enough to him to gethis amulet. That's that's what we have
to that's the key. We're we'renever going to win engaging him in an
(14:28):
actual battle, and then if weget him actually close to death, he's
just gonna disappear again or something.So you've got to get close enough to
him, have the performance of alifetime and get the amulet off of him.
And if we have to distract himwith a battle with him, thinking
that you're his ally, so beit will attack him, not you.
(14:48):
But you're gonna have to be closeenough to him to get the amulet.
Sure, sure, how but somehowthis right, they we were started off
not good and then right there inthe middle you found it. I think
now we pay attention. Okay,pay attention about right. I'm just okay,
(15:24):
yeah, okay, Nicholas cage onit man. Just like sun is
high in the sky, sounds liketime for a nooner. Yeah, let's
go see. Yeah, I mean, in the least we can get some
drinks and some viscils, should wealso try and get information about them,
about guilda brag and the prince andhow I mean this guy himself. I
(15:46):
almost assume he's going to tell useverything all the monologues. Also, obviously
the key is to get the amuletoff of him. And then once we
have the amulet, we don't reallyknow what's going to happen. But if
we have to get him to uhdown to you know, his last breath
and then question him or something,or if we just kill him, we
just kill him once he doesn't havethe Amulet on him, I don't know.
(16:08):
Yeah, I mean I feel like, you know, I feel like
we put together a pretty good planhere, and now we just kind of
see what happens, assuming that gettingthe Amulet off of the other is going
don't save our lives. I thinkyou guys put together a pretty good half
a plank that's very good for us. If I get my hands on the
amulet, I will immediately throw itto you if I get it off,
(16:32):
I got it okay. As theyare talking, I'm also like taking a
look around the lawn and kind ofjust observing the overall fortress. Can I
roll some kind of check to seewhat I see? Thought you were going
to be like crawling through the grassso that you could use this new skill
of yours again. I know thisthe building, while large, like you
(16:55):
could literally walk all the way aroundit, probably while they were having that
conversation if you wanted, um,yeah, rolling investigation, check big money.
Oh that was terrible. That wasnot big money. H seven define
terrible? Seven? Seven? Umokay, yeah seven. You walk all
(17:19):
the way around. I think whatyou're able to figure out is there is
no like rooftop parapet Like there's nothere's no lookout. There's not like a
pool on the roof or okay,you might have gonna get on the roof,
but there it would be very unsafeup there. There's no rails or
anything. Um, there's no windowseven on the backside. This is the
only pier on the island. Theisland itself not that big. It basically
(17:42):
contains the building and not much more. There's a little I mean, this
is an evil last building right,Like he's doing dark wizard shits in here.
That's why there's no windows. Sono one, we're just summers here.
I mean, you know, yeah, is it gray the dark is
(18:02):
it? Yes? Yeah? Iwould say like a dark gray almost black.
Yeah, charcoal gray, yeah,definitely not. It's Key West tribes.
It's got like Panama City, Massachusetts. Yes, the city Massachusetts the
trees anyway. Yeah, he's onthe building specific Uh of palm trees and
(18:30):
stuff like that, banana trees.You look so excited. Yes, there
are are there animals on this island. Uh, animal handling check, let's
rolling animal handling ship fun? Interestingfun, that's great. Fourteen, You
(18:53):
about what kind of animal do youwant to be on the island? Monkeys?
Banana trees of course, obviously there'sa couple of monkeys around. What
kind of don't you check with monkeys? Because I can't think of another one?
Um, and you see some somenanateees as well, floating around the
little t between islands. Okay,nantees and monkeys, m anything else before
(19:22):
we let's just going in. Let'sgo in. What do we do?
We need to name this operations?Any kind of magical words around? Can
I check? Yes, you totallycan by rolling an investigation, which which
you just did this investigation that's likea check. Yeah, it's magical the
door friend, UM, I don'tknow if I can let you just go
(19:45):
on the whole island. Is therea magic thing? I hear you,
I hear you. Um, Imean maybe there's like kind of like how
owners have invisible pet fences. Whatdo you know? Absolutely not what you're
killing me trying to signal to youto do what he wants. Yeah,
(20:08):
I hear you about the door.Um, but you know if you touch
it and it electric to you.Again, a number of times he's touched
the door. I mean that's prettygood. Odd. Yeah, yeah,
I think I want to roll tosee if there's some kind of like invisible
pet fence, magic fence thing.Making sure I heard you, like a
(20:30):
magical marrier or something for the likea pet fence. Yeah, yeah,
like like electric shock collar. Iknow what you're talking about. Yeah,
to keep you out. Yeah right, just make sure I understand. Yeah,
I just wanted to clarify he doesn'thave like a little Yorky that he's
scared is gonna run unto the oceanor I mean, we don't know.
That's a possibility. It's a possibility. I just want to make sure I
(20:51):
understood what that Maybe sheds something that'sdesigned to keep something else in, not
keep us out. That would bedangerous. Yeah. Another one. It
was me the entire time. Yeah, and she's talking. Oh my god,
it was rainbow. Yeah, you'regood at it, dude. Shit
(21:15):
thirteen Yeah, tee. We wereall like, Oh, it was just
one of those things for me andteam like, oh, that's not okay,
thirteen. I think with a thirteenwhat you get is there's definitely a
(21:41):
There's no fence or anything like that. It's not like if you cross ever
a certain porter portion of the lawnyou're gonna get electrocuted or anything like that.
Um, but there is definitely avery strong, uh, magical aura
coming out of the building. Sortof Yeah, even if the door were
closed, you can kind of seeit through the walls, that sort of
thing. Is there is there achance since I'm a warlock, I could
I could have a greater sense ofif there's anything like that there if I
(22:03):
wrote like an investigation or our kindof check, or would if she like
talked to you and told you thething? And yeah, absolute kestro,
could you sense anything? Ailius?Actually I did, and and there's some
kind of magical aura that's coming fromthe building. I hated here to be
(22:26):
fair, you put this into theWorld's a Dark Wizard. Yeah, yeah,
I did this to myself. AmI standing by any sand or is
it because I'm on the lawn.Now let's say you're standing by a ton
of sand just because I'm curious.Well, I'm just gonna scoop up a
handful of sand and put in alittle pot, little pocket sand. I
like that. I like that.That's a nine plus four, right,
(22:53):
pretty girl? All right? Myeah, I think we're the thirteen,
same thing, same kind of story. I mean, you could tell it.
There's lots of mett. Once yousort of focus on it, you
can tell it's a lot of magicimanating from this building, but no sense
of specifics. Let's just go in, Mite. He left the door open
for a reason. He's expecting uslead the way, Timbo. All right,
(23:15):
I go ahead and push the dooropen and say Daddy's so ah.
Yeah, established dominance, even thoughyou've walked into a rather large ante chamber
that has bricks and higher up stone. The weird thing is when you shout
(23:37):
Daddy's home, there's no echo.You just say it and it. He
doesn't reverberate back to your rooms.Very sound proved. That's odd. I
don't even hear Nikko with my ownvoice. Might have a bit of an
impressive feeling just standing in this roomright now. This might be something other
than just the three storied tower here, did y'all feel any magic? Earlier?
(24:03):
There was an davic he Ye,what you see in front of you
is a brick lined sort of antichamber or fourier or fourier if you're feeling
(24:26):
particularly fancy. Um, there's onedoor right in front of you. Um.
And then at the top it's sortof stone lined, but it's uh,
sort of arched at the top domedceiling, so larger room than you
would expect. And the minute thefour of you come in you turn around
him. Bill is like like trying, he's like trying to work up the
courage to like take a step inand in his face, Oh how convenient.
(24:53):
And immediately the candles that were onthe walls snuff out and it's completely
dark. Lindsay, I already knowyou have to Arkisian need to say?
And my eagle eyes and you've gotI'm assuming helps you here. I don't
remember if it does. Indeed,you basically have Darkisian now right? Basically
no, basically is it in dimlight or dark light? Dim? It
(25:17):
is dim? I would say,not quite. You could see maybe a
little bit better, but Catro's goingon, where is everyone? What do
I see? You see the samething you saw before. Um, but
one of the candles there were probablytwelve lit when you walked in. One
of the candles ignites again. It'sright by the doorway, right above the
(25:40):
doorway, in fact, and youhear you have entered the Getaway Chamber.
I'm happy to be your host,but you must follow instructions. There's no
there is a way to solve everyroom, but if you attempt to break
it, I'll break you. Welcometo the Getaway Chamber. And the door
just slides open. And now aword from our sponsors who wants to pay
(26:14):
Wars? I fuck up? Yeahno, I think I think we're doing
it out of here. Yeah.So this past holiday season, you guys,
where did you get a lot ofyour gifts? Uh? Well,
Little Wars actually where I got thesweet DND sleep thing here. Didn't notice
(26:38):
that your character sheets are in thepo Yeah? Yeah, finally, finally
remember my spell cards. You canalso buy a Little Wars. Yeah.
My brother is actually really big intorandom tabletop games, and I found a
couple of new ones from him,like what is it the Trail at Balder's
Gate, which sounds really fun toUniverse India universe. The only takes a
(27:00):
little while to set up, butboys are worth it, really a good
payoff. And then a couple ofmy other friends are really into painting those
miniatures, so I got them likea couple of gift cards to like,
go and get some. That's cool, we should get some miniatures for us
and we can have them on thetable. Like It's a great idea about
a Blood Bowl season two booklet,because Blood bowls incredible, and actually Little
(27:21):
Wars has like probably legitimately one ofthe best Blood Bowl communities in the entire
country. If that sounds like someof you be in do. They have
like thirty two person leagues that youcan go play in, super super fun.
In general, they have fantasy isfantasy football, where the fantasy is
you know, your goblins and orcsand towards me, very very tactical,
(27:41):
the most rage inducing game I've everplayed in my entire life. Well,
in general, Little Wars has anamazing community, not not just Blood Bowl.
I mean the staff there is alsosuper helpful whenever you walk in,
just like, hey, can wehelp you find a game? Like what
are you looking for? Yeah,So they're they're really great. He's you
to kind of dive into exactly whatyou might be interested in. It's not
(28:03):
clicky like a lot of those storesare. And if you haven't been in
the Little Wars in a few years, like before Vann and them took it
overhead a little bit of them,Van just completely turned it around. It's
such aphere. It's not like acamp. You know, sometimes you walk
in and you just feel like anoutsider. Not in the case at Little
Wars. One of Baton Rouge isHidden Gems right off of Jefferson Highway in
Baton Rouge. Finding them on Instagramat Little Wars br They've got a Facebook
(28:27):
page as well. Make sure you'rechecking them out. Thanks to Little Wars
for being a sponsor of the NightShift who thanks a Little Wars Love You
welcome the Aron House Cookball turn themon up necks. We have the night
Shift perennial losers. You know,their legs have gotten stronger, their hearts
(28:48):
have grown three times the size,and they appear to be okay. Well,
let's take a little break, ladiesand gentle bad and we'll be back
in five. Yeah, we feeleda little stronger since the last time.
We're leveled up even though it's beena little while. Wow, wow,
hey Bill, great job out there, man, you really well. I
know you didn't get on base today, but your effort was astounding. Great
(29:11):
job Bill. People kept telling methat I was, I was, I
was never gonna get to third base, and I um, I didn't know.
You didn't effort? How did youmiss that ball? I can't get
right to you, I mean,right, gee, I might as well
use you as the ball next.To be fair, I'm about the size
of the ball and you kicked itright next time you climb up on attilius
(29:32):
as is that legal? We lookin the rule. Just pour me a
drink, okay, whatever, Well, I'm so angry right now. My
good friends over at rally Cap tookthe liberty of brewing us a beer named
after something that will never truly understand, and that is Victory Formation. And
(29:53):
there's some assessment to be some sortof runic symbols of some sort from this
can. Well. Yes, uh, the good news is a hazy i
PA eight percent alcohol by a volume. Victory Formation is very tasty, even
though we'll never really understand what it'slike. Hey, it's a fifteen to
(30:14):
zero okay, y'all, let's getfree. They still have a chance,
for sure. It's a perfect sportsbrew. Yes, yeah, quench the
first I reckon. When I crankout, my dingers are can just trot
around the base path and watch itwith the dingers. This is a family
sport. We don't want to fuckinglove American football. I get it.
(30:38):
It's like I can read the room, just football man. Fuck. Yeah,
this is actually great. Something happened. It's all bumpa over there.
Yeah, delicious beer. Pelican CraftBrands distributes this throughout the Greater Louisiana area.
Always a fan of bringing delicious craftbeer to the people. To take
(31:02):
notes of Citrus. It's quite delicious. Your palate very astute. Over there.
She worked on her kickball skills likeshe's been working on her beer.
Tom's fault. He missed the ball. Missed the ball. You know the
game works. Why would on thefield back on the field? Let Oh
(31:38):
what does that mean? It willbreak us? That was creepy. Hmm.
All right, so I guess wehave to go this way, right,
we're obviously being let I feel likewe're already kind of pot committed at
this. This is bullshit. Justcome out. Okay, I don't want
to do any stupid riddles. Uh, timbo, are you going to lead
(32:00):
the way here? Of course Iwill, mate. There's a candle it
I can see just fine. I'mgonna homp on jump on my back to
it is dim light. You cannow see just fine. Okay. You
walk through that door, yeah again? This time instead of slamming, it
just sort of and closes behind you. Um, what you've walked into is
(32:22):
uh call it like a sitting room. Right. There's like a couple of
couches and chairs, and there's achandelier filled with candles above you. And
the minute that door closes and thelock slides in your ears or or in
your head, it's hard to tell. You hear an extremely high pitched noise,
(32:45):
just like a wine. If you'veever had tenitis or something. Yeah,
it doesn't hurt, sup, It'slike annoying and there and then it
reaches the point of hurting and andit goes back. Now what it was
that? I don't like that soundat all. Hi, welcome to the
(33:06):
first room in the getaway chamber.Oh, I hate you, I hate
you. Miss minutes, good luck, thank thank you. Okay, this
is guys, it's like room,What do we what do we need to
do? What else is in theroom? Is there anything couches, tables?
No? Is there another door orno? Nothing? Right now,
(33:28):
there's no door. Did that highpitched noise seemed to be coming from anywhere?
I want to Was it inside oroutside of the room? It was?
It was hard to tell if ifit was inside the room or if
it was just inside your head.Definitely couldn't tell if it was coming from
somewhere else. Um, I wouldn'tdo an aricon of check on the couches
(33:49):
and chairs? Okay? Do it? Ah? That is a sorry this
I should have this ready to go. Um that is a fifteen. Okay,
So with a fifteen, Um,I think as soon as you start
(34:10):
looking at these couches and chairs,you realize something's a little off. Not
about the couches and the chairs,you just that high pitched noise. It
got into your head. It wormedits way into your brain a little bit.
So what I want you to dois roll one, die six and
tell about the number is oh boyfour? Nope, roll a different one.
(34:37):
Cry hey three. I'm going tohand you a card to read it.
No one else can read it,and you have to follow the instructions
immediately. Okay, okay, everyoneelse, go ahead and roll it one
day six. I don't like thisin order, please chuck first six one
(35:07):
two, good luck two for tembowow again. You must follow the instructions
immediately. Oh starting now, Well, I don't know what to tell you
(35:30):
all about these chairs and castes overas a goddamn thing, trying to see
what's going on? What are yousaying? What are y'all talking about?
I was trying to check these herecastes, but there's some sort of magic
in this here room. But Idon't know exactly what the magic is.
Why is your voice so deep?Mate? I don't know what you're talking
(35:52):
about. Man, I'm just herein these cushions or else we all become
some pin cushions? Um? Okay, uh why, I don't know that
was a good one, timbo Um. I take out my dagger and I
(36:15):
just start carving open the cushion.What are you doing? I'll take out
my dagger and I'll start carving cushionstoo. What ba dash to Bambo?
What are you doing? I'm followingKesher's lead? But what why does everything
you say start with a bee.Hey, all right, hey Chuck,
(36:37):
you can ignore yours now, okay, Um Chuck, you feel bad you
didn't realize it, um ottilious,but that that high pitched noise, it
was still in your head. You'vejust gotten used to it, and finally
it sort of shuts off and youcan feel like a headache go away,
essentially subsides like it's like unclenching yourjaw after several hours. Castle, are
(37:00):
you seeing anything in these here pillows? Yeah? You guys cut up these
pillows and there's there's lots of goosedown feathers. No, it's quality.
No, this is terrible. Havey'all ever played duck duck? Gray guns?
And my headache is now unbearable?Ah, it seems to me you're
(37:22):
making a lot of rhymes here,yea Castle, you feel sort of your
jaw and clanching your head ache?Tom, why are you speaking of that
stupid John Wayne accident? What JohnWayne accident? He was talking about?
I didn't cowboy timbos, I don'tfully understand what, just don't know this
(37:59):
in my ear? Is this gone? Okay? My ringing's gone to gone?
Why I'm still asking questions so whydid y'all start cutting the pillows?
I got to feel bad about that. Now you were really nice. He
wasn't before. I don't know.I'm just really angry, un welcome and
(38:21):
good Hello gladows. You did great. However, that was a little fast.
That was easy mode. How aboutwe go media? How about shame
rumor? Do we get to goto another room? Oh we'll do it
here. Okay, But the cushions, But the cushions. Everybody roll one
(38:43):
twenty a seventeen for Timbo, seventeenfor Tillius, fifteen six more these?
(39:07):
Oh god, only two of you, Kestrel and Tom Bombo. Feel that
that noise in your head again?Oh fuck, it's back, God damn
bringing in my ears heite. Idon't hear it, man, it's just
you don't have it. Just Idon't reckon h dinging in in in my
(39:29):
ear holes. Look, we justgotta figure this out before this becomes a
bigger problem. Already, do somethingto help us figure this out. Um,
I mean surely, Look, wedon't have to play it. There's
gonna be some way out of here, maybe, right, Yeah, we
shouldn't have to play this game.There has to be another way all right?
Now, why are you both agreeingwith each other like this? Son
(39:51):
of a bitch? Tilias, helpme look around here a little bit,
maybe in the wall, hands helphim view things? Is it is?
Are you playing the repeater? Um? Let's all I say, We're close.
Yeah, I wouldn't do he perceptioncheck on their a bookcase or anything
adorning the walls. Let's say,yeah, I want to see where this
(40:12):
goes? Yes, is there anykind of shelf paraphernalia that is on the
paraphrasing everything? He says, yeah, gosh, that's good enough. Eighteen
as I'm looking on the wall orlike for any secret little like spots.
Yeah, you look through and oh, so weirdly you find a book called
(40:34):
Attilius the first, Oh for realthru you Attilius, come check this out?
The fuck is this? Says Attilius, the first one here? M
hmm, I've never seen this before. Maybe written by one of my ancestors.
What what Attilius are you? Iam the haunted. I go by
(41:00):
no number. No, no,no, that's not a number. If
he's the first, surely you fallsomewhere in there. I'm not a number.
I am a free dragon. Boarda bittilis. Does he find everything
funny? Yes, everything is amusing. Keep asking me these things that I
can't help a laugh, it's it'sit's wild. He's chuckling. God,
(41:23):
everything so humorous, humorous? Thata bone joke. I don't think I
have any bones problem right now,but I do need to get this ringing
taken. Has he taken turtle joke? Drug use this time? This time?
Yes? Not this time. He'sjust high on life, Timbo.
(41:45):
If you found anything, Kestrel's yourringing still going on? Oh no,
I'm good. You're good, Jimbo, you're good. Questions by asking all
these questions, question, what areyou talking about? I'm just a Are
you how are you feeling? Areyou feeling? No? King, I
feel fine, of course you feelfine. You just got all that HB.
You probably feel wonderful. Oh ishe asking a question and then answering
(42:08):
it himself? Um, God,damn, oh no, No, that's
not what's going on exactly. Imean I would tell you, but every
time I go to say it,it's just a stream. You just can't
shut up saying whatever you think.No, it's no, yeah, no,
um obvious. He just has tokeep talking. Figure out what he's
(42:35):
like doing all these things? Areyou an opposite? I cannot get enough
of you right out. Every timeyou say something, you're laughing at it.
Ask you something, and you something. That's the person on your side
of the table. Fuck. I'msorry, Taylor's I really do think you're
(43:01):
funny. I would have it.I knew I was humorous, but I
think he was. Getaway Chamber.I hate this room in your face.
The I take feathers and plug themin my ears so I don't have to
listen to that voice again. Whoa, and I take feathers and put them
(43:22):
in my ears. Okay, weall take feathers and the bookcase just recedes
into the floor, and behind itis an open hallway. I mean yeah,
I mean look, guys, Iknow I didn't figure that out,
but my instincts, I mean,the book gates give something I hate.
There we go, Um, Timbo, you want to lead the way,
(43:43):
absolutely all I do. Hop onAttilius's back. Come on, come on,
Tom, alright, I proceed downthe hallway. You proceed down a
long brick hallway, sort of longerthan it seems like it should be.
Like you feel like you walk Idon't know, maybe one hundred feet before
you actually hit a single room ora single door. Um, and then
(44:07):
you emerge into what is a likea grand dining room. There's um thirty
doors all the way around the exteriorwall and they're numbered one through thirty.
On the table sits a feast ofkind of epic proportions. There's there's everything
(44:30):
you can imagine. I literally grabbedTom by the shirt before he can run,
and I'm kind of like exactly she'slifted me off the ground at this
point and cartoonishly running in place alittle scrums. Incredible. I am famished.
(44:51):
Lucious food sucked behind you. Thehallway it turns into a wall and
you hear you even to the getawaychamber. Room number two, congratulations on
your swift victory. And room numberone. Are you feeling Peckish's quite very
hungry. Always I am two things, but only once you have to guess
(45:16):
me, or you're a dunce.I'm not a vegetable or a meat but
ripened right, I am quite sweetand two things, but only once.
If you don't guess me, you'redunce. Not a vegetable or meat,
(45:37):
but ripened right, I am quitesweet wine ripened right, quite sweet?
Guys, I think it's a riddlemy by author. He's just in h
(46:04):
two things, but only once.I guess we're dunce. That's kind of
a throway line. Not a ventualmeans ripe and rock quiet. See it
could be a grape. Are theregrapes on the table. There are grapes
on the table. There's also wineon the table. I was thinking,
because wine is definitely not a vegetableor meat. But it's both juice.
(46:28):
But I know, yes, butthen it's right like apple and apple juice
at that point also apply. Yeah, but like there's no like, you
can't be wine. Oh you couldbe cider and apple juice. Yeah,
true, you could two things,but only once. There's something there's something
like not like an egg, butmaybe something along those lines of like I
(46:52):
can what can kind of feed youin multiple different states? Water? Ice?
There's both water and ice on thetable. Ripened, ripened, ripened
would not go with that. Man. Yeah, I like eggs, but
but ripened and sweet doesn't work nowand then and raisins are sweet love,
(47:20):
I don't know there raisins on thetable I'll just go grab some raisins real
quick and we can keep talking.It's probably m well, what is on
the table? Can we take alook at the table? Two things but
only once? What is the butonly once? Mean? I think like
once you do something to it thenit can never be that other again,
(47:44):
So water's average because you could refreezewater. Yeah, it's just something that
you would cut peel. I couldbe wrong there. And two things tomatoes
only once. Well with the secondtomatoes, I don't know, not invention.
(48:12):
No, it is a fruit,and there are a lot of debate
over tomatoes. Which one is.Yeah, well, yeah, something like
would go from like sour or sweetor like something that would like it's kind
of blended first, but once itripens, like the taste chaine to taste
a lot of change. Yeah,I mean, but the plantains a lot
(48:35):
of fruits, both straw and berries, all grapes will and it's develop their
sugars at the end. There's somethinglike it's like there's something some sort of
like perfect like yeah, hi,looks like you're struggling with room too.
(49:00):
Do you need the riddle? Butyeah, again, I am two things
but only once. You have toguess me or you're a dunce. I'm
not a vegetable or a meat,but ripe and right, I am quite
sweet. Remember you have one hintyou may use. Okay, what other
foods are on this table? Justtell us run down the foods. There
(49:22):
are so many foods I couldn't possiblylist them. And it feels like every
time you circle the table you're findingmore stuff. Okay, okay, bitch
magic. So we do have ahint. Once ripened, I am quite
(49:44):
sweet. Do we think the dunceline is? I feel like maybe we're
concentrating tore. They just wanted torun mom, I'm still landing there.
I just wanted to pose it tothe group, wanted it to run.
(50:05):
Good call. I mean on twothings, but only once. But like,
I'm not a vegetable or meat,so like that's that's what I'm wondering.
Fruit, Like it's either a fruitor bread. But you can't be
like you can't have ripe bread.How did that become sweet banana bread?
(50:29):
I was kind of thinking, likeI was. I was kind of thinking
banana as well, but I justit was great banana bread. Thirteen Because
when bananas become really ripe. Theyget put into banana breadana bread. You
(50:50):
can't take it back, to takeit back like it's only once you're making
a band of bread. You're notgetting a banana again. That's a good
point. Well, you got downthe sort of agricultural issues here. Is
it a food? Is it food? Maybe Tom's our pet? Oh?
(51:13):
Okay, unnecessary? Okay, focusyour energy, morse on solution orients clever
energy to find our solar. I'mokay, are we redound? As for
hinting? Guys? Ripened? Right? I guess is there a wrong way
to ripen something? Are we like? Is there's are we trying to are
we trying to write? Is thissomething that people are giving the bed?
(51:37):
Is he really that clever? Heis not? I think I think I'm
think I'm focusing on the ripened.Okay, do you want to do the
hindo? Let's do the Yeah,it can't be well, we probably Yeah,
they're on the table you hey,anything che he's gonna says on the
(52:00):
table right cigarettes tobacco. They startstobacco. Okay, you're gonna pick something
up. You're gonna pick something up. We're gonna be a dunce. I
mean, I don't know consequences.I don't want to be a dunce,
(52:22):
to be clear. That could becould be, that could be like a
little classic evil wizard understatement. Andno, you're a dunce and here's an
infernal demon. I don't. Let'sjust if we're gonna touch something on the
table, I would vote maybe drinksome wine then at least get Okay,
no you kind of hi No,I would say we take the hint before
(52:45):
we touch anything on the time.All right, damn robot lady, root
lady. Hi, seems like you'rehaving some trouble. Would you like to
use your hands? One? Yeah, that's a touch stone for yes?
(53:06):
Yeah, yes, great, happyto help. So, um, what
is two of one? Thing calleda par I hate everything? It was
word play. We should have knownit. It was always it's always word
(53:28):
for it. It's always a punI hate everything. Um, okay,
Castrol takes up, walks over andgrabs a pair. Yeah. As as
soon as you pick up the pair, what pick it up? Throws it
at the wall and throw it upthe wall? Why not? Okay?
That's fun? Uh? What elsewould you like to do? I guess
(53:52):
I'll grab a pair as well.Yeah, yeah, I'll grab a pair
and I'll bite it. Yeah,I'll bite it it. I'll eat the
damn. Yeah, I'm gonna followyou all go pa, bide in the
parents, and I got a pairof dse for you. It's progressively.
(54:16):
Do you have an inspiration? Diesnot with me currently. I think I
may like I think I do inmy base at home. I'm not sure,
but yeah, I go ahead andtouch whatever. All right. When
the last of you picks up thelast pair, you can you see that
there's a little key beneath that lastpair. Is there a number by the
(54:38):
pair? Uh? There's not.But when you pick up the key,
you hear, great job, yousolved it. But with only a little
help. It's kind of a lot. But when my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twiceas old as me. My age
(55:00):
is my door. Oh math,y'all have this one. My brain will
lock up. Thirty one I waseight, he's twice. It's place is
old. Oh no, I youhave an idea. No, I'm not
(55:22):
good at math. Yeah, it'snot gonna be math. Right, there's
no trying to figure it out.There's a riddle. This is a riddle,
it's not a math problem. Soundslike math to me. Well,
I mean when my father was thirtyone, I was eight, robot lady,
(55:46):
could you repeat it? Sure?When my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twiceas old as me. My age is
my door, My age is mydoor. Twice as old as her he
was thirty one, but we don'tknow how much time hath Oh wait,
(56:10):
okay, age is so it's oneth thirty's killing me? Now he's twice
as old as me. M um, oh it is math. Yeah,
(56:31):
it's always a ready. Um.So they're twenty three years apart. Uh
is that what it is? Soif she's fIF fifteen, yeah, okay,
yeah so uh so door number thenokay, so she's fifteen, now
(56:51):
he's twice as old as me.Like, no, no, no,
no, she's twenty three, she'stwenty three, twenty three years apart.
Well, but it's she's twice asold, so twenty yes, no,
I know what I'm saying. Okay, So he plays fifteen is twenty three
if thirty one plus fifteen is fortysix, So she's twenty three, right,
(57:14):
forty six and twenty three works infifteen years. Right, So then
she's twenty three years old, sothey age. Is the door door twenty
three? Right? He was thirtyone twos eight, if she's twenty three,
twenty three years, separate them.He's forty six, Yes, that's
twenty three and forty six half six, we got twenty three. Yes,
(57:37):
with the key, and I giveit a little jiggle, jiggle thinking with
the key, with the key.Okay, it doesn't fold, I hope,
but it doesn't fold. Yeah,I hope it doesn't fold. O,
No, I got you all um, Yeah, you don't get this
is gonna make so much sense,like nine months passes. Yeah, it's
(58:05):
actually from a Louis throw in.You throw great documentary on if you're a
huge nerd like man. Yea.So it is jingle jingle though, is
it really? Yeah? Because it'sloose changes your poet, my money don't
jingle jingle because it's not changed.It folds because it's not a bills right
now, you're right, all right, let's move all right, dollar bills.
I don't carry coins. You knowwhat I carry? It does fold
(58:25):
you turn the key in the foldsdown again. It's magic. He can
do whatever we want I mean,the world is opened it. Let's do
it about I'll put it in mynotes door fold, remember that jingle door
fold. It is funny. Hedidn't realize it was a math question,
(58:46):
but he is the one that kindof figured it out. No one who
can do math, you realize Iwasn't going to do it. To do
it my pen not any different thannormal. But that's like a content I
never really thought about before. Right, is like somebody being three times your
(59:06):
age and then you go the sameamount of time and they're only double your
age and only for one year.Yeah, it's weird. That's how math
works. Know what I'm saying.I don't under I do not understand that.
Like my brain. I'm a writer, not a Well, hey,
here's the good idea. You canstart writing during the session. What do
(59:29):
you think of that solid burn?Next time on night shift thirteen? Damage?
So yeah, let's say you turnall the way around and just lop
(59:50):
this one's head off, Yeah,into the ground. Body sort of collapses
over over the head in fact um, what else? How cool do I
look doing that? Team? Fuckingbadass? Dude, you gutted one and
then chopped the head off the other. While spinning, then yeah, m hm
The Night Shift is a real playD and D video and podcast series for
mature audiences. Content warnings can befound in the episode descriptions Last Time on
the night Shift. I'm just saying, a little steamy pirate romance on the
boat for a few days sounds likea good time. I hear you the
buccaneer in the Babe, I'm pickingup with your boots. Maybe next time
(00:23):
I wasn't doing so much fucking opium, Maybe I could. He got lost
in the soul. Oh my god, I can't scrip together gold. My
souls already sold. Swim you trappedin your spell. I wish you well,
(00:47):
then for creatrun your streets. Youdo better to retreats if you want
it done right, don't huh Anight shift. The Corleon Aisles are as
close as this world has to paradise, not quite heaven, but close enough
(01:07):
to cause confusion. You stand aboardthe swaying deck of the water worm,
waves crashing beneath you against the cedarplanks of the weathered hull. The sun
is shining so brightly that you allfind yourselves squinting, trying to make out
the details of the figure waving atyou. From the island below. But
(01:29):
by his stature, his purple cloak, and his general disposition, he is
unmistakable. It is, of courseDadic Goresman. He turns, smiles,
and slowly strolls to the open doorof his not so humble three story abode.
Palm trees sway in a strong breeze, the salty s air sobering you
(01:49):
almost as much as the sight ofa body jumping dark wizard of untold power.
The rope stairs are unfurled, itsbottom rungs dangling a couple of feet
above the pier, and behind youyou're here? What are he is waiting
for welcome party? Come on,get off my fucking boat, U Jimbo.
I'm very rude of you, said, Am I crazy? Or I
(02:12):
mean I have some sorts of uminstinctual thing telling me your eyes just got
significantly better. Your eyes And thatwas David, right, I could tell
that was David. I knew it. I knew I got a bit cloak.
I knew it. I mean Icould see it when we were over
(02:34):
the island that you can't even theway past the horizon listeners at home,
Uh, just leveled up and gotbetter vision. Significantly better vision. He
can see things from like a mileaway. Yeah, essentially had relax.
Okay, guy, we're going youknow who that is, don't you walk
(02:57):
in there? That's the guy.That's the fucking guy, right, that's
the the you know, the onewe would deliver the furniture. And how
far away away from the shore it'soff. You're like, so this rope
ladder on the side of the shipbasically goes down to the pier and you're
these deep water areas are very pressing. Well, okay, Kestral skips the
ladder entirely, jumps into the oceanand swims through a ship ton of seaweeds.
(03:24):
Wow, looking out deftly, she'smanaged all that, going right through
the swedstegrates in front of me.Because this awesome aura that I'm now unbelievable.
It seems she too, has gainedsome new I have lost control insirely
(03:47):
and immediate eye spy with my eagle, Kestral doesn't seem phased by the unreal
Wow. Wow, yep, areyou seeing this? Yeah? No,
she's like cutting right through the water. We got the seaweed. No,
(04:08):
she's right around, No, I'mright right there. There's a ship ton
of coral in front of me,and I just I'm telling you, it
just dissolves, just dissolves. Okayfor the coral though, that's a reef
in this world everywhere, lots ofreef zavis reef that. Yeah, yeah,
it doesn't right, goodbye then,Lucius. Oh okay, all right,
(04:32):
backflip off the ship. Sure right, that is a you wanted athletics
track. But I get to choose. You get to choose. Okay,
that is going to be as gonnabe a seventeen seventeen Tom. It's a
long drop. Yeah we're talking.But Tom lands kind of like overturned on
(04:58):
his backflip and it helps him littlebit. Yeah, I roll into a
park course style. Yeah, hewas on Glands sort of on his heels
and rolls immediately backwards a few timesand then springs up from a somersault and
dust the gymnast post. I wantto hands out, yes, toast,
hands out, But like you knowwhen like Willy Wonka pulls that forward somersault
and he pops up all nimble bimbley, like it has those vibes strangely,
(05:20):
yes, I do. On thepier. Yeah, he's on the pier.
Okay, Castrill takes a ship tonof seaweed and throws it on him.
Oh Jesus Christ, here so youhit the perfect pose and then see
from the cast what the fuck restedagetation coop cleaned it off. I just
(05:44):
climbed down the rope ladder like anormal person, color flexing so hard on
this, Like hell, you knowyou guys are doing crazy. It's useful,
but you do crazy stuff, allright, Lazi, Just thanks for
the ride, mate, See whatwould you like need to do? Should
(06:05):
I stay? Should I stay out? What you're gonna You're gonna You're just
gonna have. I don't think anythingthat's gonna happen. You should probably stay.
Yeah, you should be fine.It doesn't look like Bill was gonna.
And Bill is like, I'm justgonna stay. I'm just gonna because
that looks oh that look that lookslike like a lot. So I'm gonna
stay. Mate, you don't wantto go talk to the Yeah, well
(06:27):
yes we need you, we needyour blade, all right? Yes,
well what if you stay? Buthe come like reaches around and he grabs
a knife and he's like, youwant me to just throw it to you?
I want you to throw it inDavic's neck. Yeah, in the
neck, um to your trademark,Billy kind of you could we do a
thing where like, um, Igo in the room last you know,
yeah, then yeah, absolutely comeum and then him and Lucia just have
(06:50):
to figure out how to get aneight hundred pound turtle down a ropees wing.
But he's the water. He's nota seed turtle. Tom, Wow,
you're jumps in the water. Ican't think of everything. I don't
(07:12):
tell you. I can't even thinkof most things. What are we doing?
Pinned joining us, Pin stays,I don't need that many mpeces.
Pin stays Bill. Bill will comewith you, Pin will be backin winks
winks. All right. M Soyou step up on this pier and it's
(07:35):
looks like it's newly constructed, verywell constructed, and then what stretches out
in front of you is like thisvery well manicured lawn essentially, and then
a huge I think I described toyou last time, but three story sort
of why but like pretty formidable,uh tower fortress um no windows and one
(08:00):
door that is slightly a jar thefront door in fact, no windows,
no windows, the front door atall. I hear you, You know
what I mean? I think Iprefer the man's ambiance a bit more than
(08:20):
this doesn't seem very welcoming, doesn'tlike I wanted to break into the man's
I was like, you left thedoor open. I feel like that's an
invitation to follow him in. Iknow, and I was funny out the
world works. I almost don't wantto at this point, he's still lawn
or he walked down Yeah, yeah, I know he inside the building.
Um, should we talk about thisat all? Guys? Um some kind
of strategy before we move forward?All right? Group, group, Okay,
(08:43):
group, I would say, thestrategy is your strength. So let's
absolutely. Um do you mean whatare we are? We are we coming
to? When I hear it?How dare you say? Okay, let's
let's yeah, we're gonna have tofight him again? Right, believe that
he's gonna pier was about okay exactly? So what did Haslet tell us about
(09:05):
how to defeat the doc Wizard?Well, we need to get him in
he get him bloody down, yeah, down to like you know, his
last breath. But but he can'tif we basically, if we kill him,
he's just gonna jump bodies, umperform, So we need ritual.
We know that maybe maybe or dowe get maybe if we just go after
(09:30):
his uh medallion, you know whatever, his amulets. Yeah, um,
maybe if we rid him of theamulet, Tom, why don't you get
close to Daddy, put on acostume and seduce him and then dall whoa
the dragon real quick? Seduce him? You know, I'm very confident,
(09:58):
Yeah he does, and have LadyTarris anymore? I don't, I know
I'm coming. I doubt my abilityto sell this to David. I'm willing
to try, but let's maybe havea backup plan just in case ec through
my ruse. I'll start gathering somecoconuts and start stuffing my shirts and whatnot,
and we'll uh coconut kind of workfrom there. Okay, classic coconuts,
(10:20):
find me on the ground and makesome assumptions about his preferences. First
of all, well, I mean, Lady Harris was a female, so
I don't know you could be anhappy man, you don't. You did
talk about a bucks him halfling earlier, so like I'm kind of channeling that
what's her name not bucks hm halfling? She is a halfling. She is
a female, she's probably pretty muscular. Well, she's probably pretty muscular,
(10:41):
so she could be uh like that, you're getting lost here. I'm gonna
grab some coconuts. But what whatwhat mean? Should we be ready to
fight? Here? I take thecourt Lean Isles coin that I have in
my backup holding. I take itout and I does it look any different
now that we're in the Corelean Aisles? Looks the same? No, it
(11:05):
does not look any different. Stillhas Davic engraved on it, so scratched
into it. Uh, guys,this was this was lady Terros's uh ambulet
or her coin that she kept onher with Davik's name on it from the
Corlean Aisles. Kind of what ledus here? Maybe we could boggin with
(11:26):
him, perhaps with this coin,show him that we have it and that
we know how she contained in thatcoin or she We don't know it?
No where I don't believe we lost. Yes, and because this coin was
her way of killed her. Welldump bodies, but no way about making
Davik believe that it's her with Ohwe could we could make Davic think we
(11:52):
are her in one of our bodies. Yes, that's what we're supposed to,
what we're doing. Okay, okay, into tom Bombo. You will
take this coin and with the coconutsthat you have found. Yes, yes,
(12:13):
we will make Yes, we will. We will go in. We
will go in. We will engageDavic and conversation. Yes, we will
talk about how we defeated Lady Tarrosback uh in in uh Hi home,
thank you in Hi home. Atsome point you will pull the havoc aside,
(12:37):
show him the coin and say it'sokay, I jumped bodies, I'm
Lady Tarros. Okay. So inthat scenario, yes, I don't think
I need the coconut booths set right. I mean that's fine. I'm down
because I don't think that's probably theleast convincing parts of my outfit. So
(12:58):
we get rid of those. Ido like the dep I just want to
see you with a coconut knocles,mate, or I mean they do feel
they don't feel great actually quite scratchyum. But but I just I just
crack open a coconut real quick anddrink the coconut milk. So I could
try to take David to the side. Or we maybe we do a thing
(13:18):
where it's like then Lady Terrell's jumpedinto Tom's body and she got to talking
to us, and now we're onyour side, and that's where we came
here, was to uh help herout with you. No. No,
you go in deceiving thinking like we'relike, we're you think your Tom?
Yeah, we think you're Tom,and you're like, I fooled them all
and brought them to you. Iam. I tell you why this is
kind of tricked Davos, because it'salready tricked me. I'm confused. Okay,
(13:41):
no, no, yeah, no, let's see it. Okay,
how any ideas on how to getto me and him alone? Maybe maybe
I'll be I think, well we'llbe able to figure that out while we're
waiting on refreshments or something. Butyeah, I agree, just freestyle plan.
(14:03):
Here's my question though, Once weget him convinced that you're actually Lady
Terris because you have the coin,I'm going to tell him that I must,
then what are we going to do? Is he just gonna say,
all right, the two of younow kill us three and then we I
mean, at some point you're justgonna have to well, you have to
get close enough to him to gethis amulet. That's that's what we have
to that's the key. We're we'renever going to win engaging him in an
(14:28):
actual battle, and then if weget him actually close to death, he's
just gonna disappear again or something.So you've got to get close enough to
him, have the performance of alifetime and get the amulet off of him.
And if we have to distract himwith a battle with him, thinking
that you're his ally, so beit will attack him, not you.
(14:48):
But you're gonna have to be closeenough to him to get the amulet.
Sure, sure, how but somehowthis right, they we were started off
not good and then right there inthe middle you found it. I think
now we pay attention. Okay,pay attention about right. I'm just okay,
(15:24):
yeah, okay, Nicholas cage onit man. Just like sun is
high in the sky, sounds liketime for a nooner. Yeah, let's
go see. Yeah, I mean, in the least we can get some
drinks and some viscils, should wealso try and get information about them,
about guilda brag and the prince andhow I mean this guy himself. I
(15:46):
almost assume he's going to tell useverything all the monologues. Also, obviously
the key is to get the amuletoff of him. And then once we
have the amulet, we don't reallyknow what's going to happen. But if
we have to get him to uhdown to you know, his last breath
and then question him or something,or if we just kill him, we
just kill him once he doesn't havethe Amulet on him, I don't know.
(16:08):
Yeah, I mean I feel like, you know, I feel like
we put together a pretty good planhere, and now we just kind of
see what happens, assuming that gettingthe Amulet off of the other is going
don't save our lives. I thinkyou guys put together a pretty good half
a plank that's very good for us. If I get my hands on the
amulet, I will immediately throw itto you if I get it off,
(16:32):
I got it okay. As theyare talking, I'm also like taking a
look around the lawn and kind ofjust observing the overall fortress. Can I
roll some kind of check to seewhat I see? Thought you were going
to be like crawling through the grassso that you could use this new skill
of yours again. I know thisthe building, while large, like you
(16:55):
could literally walk all the way aroundit, probably while they were having that
conversation if you wanted, um,yeah, rolling investigation, check big money.
Oh that was terrible. That wasnot big money. H seven define
terrible? Seven? Seven? Umokay, yeah seven. You walk all
(17:19):
the way around. I think whatyou're able to figure out is there is
no like rooftop parapet Like there's nothere's no lookout. There's not like a
pool on the roof or okay,you might have gonna get on the roof,
but there it would be very unsafeup there. There's no rails or
anything. Um, there's no windowseven on the backside. This is the
only pier on the island. Theisland itself not that big. It basically
(17:42):
contains the building and not much more. There's a little I mean, this
is an evil last building right,Like he's doing dark wizard shits in here.
That's why there's no windows. Sono one, we're just summers here.
I mean, you know, yeah, is it gray the dark is
(18:02):
it? Yes? Yeah? Iwould say like a dark gray almost black.
Yeah, charcoal gray, yeah,definitely not. It's Key West tribes.
It's got like Panama City, Massachusetts. Yes, the city Massachusetts the
trees anyway. Yeah, he's onthe building specific Uh of palm trees and
(18:30):
stuff like that, banana trees.You look so excited. Yes, there
are are there animals on this island. Uh, animal handling check, let's
rolling animal handling ship fun? Interestingfun, that's great. Fourteen, You
(18:53):
about what kind of animal do youwant to be on the island? Monkeys?
Banana trees of course, obviously there'sa couple of monkeys around. What
kind of don't you check with monkeys? Because I can't think of another one?
Um, and you see some somenanateees as well, floating around the
little t between islands. Okay,nantees and monkeys, m anything else before
(19:22):
we let's just going in. Let'sgo in. What do we do?
We need to name this operations?Any kind of magical words around? Can
I check? Yes, you totallycan by rolling an investigation, which which
you just did this investigation that's likea check. Yeah, it's magical the
door friend, UM, I don'tknow if I can let you just go
(19:45):
on the whole island. Is therea magic thing? I hear you,
I hear you. Um, Imean maybe there's like kind of like how
owners have invisible pet fences. Whatdo you know? Absolutely not what you're
killing me trying to signal to youto do what he wants. Yeah,
(20:08):
I hear you about the door.Um, but you know if you touch
it and it electric to you.Again, a number of times he's touched
the door. I mean that's prettygood. Odd. Yeah, yeah,
I think I want to roll tosee if there's some kind of like invisible
pet fence, magic fence thing.Making sure I heard you, like a
(20:30):
magical marrier or something for the likea pet fence. Yeah, yeah,
like like electric shock collar. Iknow what you're talking about. Yeah,
to keep you out. Yeah right, just make sure I understand. Yeah,
I just wanted to clarify he doesn'thave like a little Yorky that he's
scared is gonna run unto the oceanor I mean, we don't know.
That's a possibility. It's a possibility. I just want to make sure I
(20:51):
understood what that Maybe sheds something that'sdesigned to keep something else in, not
keep us out. That would bedangerous. Yeah. Another one. It
was me the entire time. Yeah, and she's talking. Oh my god,
it was rainbow. Yeah, you'regood at it, dude. Shit
(21:15):
thirteen Yeah, tee. We wereall like, Oh, it was just
one of those things for me andteam like, oh, that's not okay,
thirteen. I think with a thirteenwhat you get is there's definitely a
(21:41):
There's no fence or anything like that. It's not like if you cross ever
a certain porter portion of the lawnyou're gonna get electrocuted or anything like that.
Um, but there is definitely avery strong, uh, magical aura
coming out of the building. Sortof Yeah, even if the door were
closed, you can kind of seeit through the walls, that sort of
thing. Is there is there achance since I'm a warlock, I could
I could have a greater sense ofif there's anything like that there if I
(22:03):
wrote like an investigation or our kindof check, or would if she like
talked to you and told you thething? And yeah, absolute kestro,
could you sense anything? Ailius?Actually I did, and and there's some
kind of magical aura that's coming fromthe building. I hated here to be
(22:26):
fair, you put this into theWorld's a Dark Wizard. Yeah, yeah,
I did this to myself. AmI standing by any sand or is
it because I'm on the lawn.Now let's say you're standing by a ton
of sand just because I'm curious.Well, I'm just gonna scoop up a
handful of sand and put in alittle pot, little pocket sand. I
like that. I like that.That's a nine plus four, right,
(22:53):
pretty girl? All right? Myeah, I think we're the thirteen,
same thing, same kind of story. I mean, you could tell it.
There's lots of mett. Once yousort of focus on it, you
can tell it's a lot of magicimanating from this building, but no sense
of specifics. Let's just go in, Mite. He left the door open
for a reason. He's expecting uslead the way, Timbo. All right,
(23:15):
I go ahead and push the dooropen and say Daddy's so ah.
Yeah, established dominance, even thoughyou've walked into a rather large ante chamber
that has bricks and higher up stone. The weird thing is when you shout
(23:37):
Daddy's home, there's no echo.You just say it and it. He
doesn't reverberate back to your rooms.Very sound proved. That's odd. I
don't even hear Nikko with my ownvoice. Might have a bit of an
impressive feeling just standing in this roomright now. This might be something other
than just the three storied tower here, did y'all feel any magic? Earlier?
(24:03):
There was an davic he Ye,what you see in front of you
is a brick lined sort of antichamber or fourier or fourier if you're feeling
(24:26):
particularly fancy. Um, there's onedoor right in front of you. Um.
And then at the top it's sortof stone lined, but it's uh,
sort of arched at the top domedceiling, so larger room than you
would expect. And the minute thefour of you come in you turn around
him. Bill is like like trying, he's like trying to work up the
courage to like take a step inand in his face, Oh how convenient.
(24:53):
And immediately the candles that were onthe walls snuff out and it's completely
dark. Lindsay, I already knowyou have to Arkisian need to say?
And my eagle eyes and you've gotI'm assuming helps you here. I don't
remember if it does. Indeed,you basically have Darkisian now right? Basically
no, basically is it in dimlight or dark light? Dim? It
(25:17):
is dim? I would say,not quite. You could see maybe a
little bit better, but Catro's goingon, where is everyone? What do
I see? You see the samething you saw before. Um, but
one of the candles there were probablytwelve lit when you walked in. One
of the candles ignites again. It'sright by the doorway, right above the
(25:40):
doorway, in fact, and youhear you have entered the Getaway Chamber.
I'm happy to be your host,but you must follow instructions. There's no
there is a way to solve everyroom, but if you attempt to break
it, I'll break you. Welcometo the Getaway Chamber. And the door
just slides open. And now aword from our sponsors who wants to pay
(26:14):
Wars? I fuck up? Yeahno, I think I think we're doing
it out of here. Yeah.So this past holiday season, you guys,
where did you get a lot ofyour gifts? Uh? Well,
Little Wars actually where I got thesweet DND sleep thing here. Didn't notice
(26:38):
that your character sheets are in thepo Yeah? Yeah, finally, finally
remember my spell cards. You canalso buy a Little Wars. Yeah.
My brother is actually really big intorandom tabletop games, and I found a
couple of new ones from him,like what is it the Trail at Balder's
Gate, which sounds really fun toUniverse India universe. The only takes a
(27:00):
little while to set up, butboys are worth it, really a good
payoff. And then a couple ofmy other friends are really into painting those
miniatures, so I got them likea couple of gift cards to like,
go and get some. That's cool, we should get some miniatures for us
and we can have them on thetable. Like It's a great idea about
a Blood Bowl season two booklet,because Blood bowls incredible, and actually Little
(27:21):
Wars has like probably legitimately one ofthe best Blood Bowl communities in the entire
country. If that sounds like someof you be in do. They have
like thirty two person leagues that youcan go play in, super super fun.
In general, they have fantasy isfantasy football, where the fantasy is
you know, your goblins and orcsand towards me, very very tactical,
(27:41):
the most rage inducing game I've everplayed in my entire life. Well,
in general, Little Wars has anamazing community, not not just Blood Bowl.
I mean the staff there is alsosuper helpful whenever you walk in,
just like, hey, can wehelp you find a game? Like what
are you looking for? Yeah,So they're they're really great. He's you
to kind of dive into exactly whatyou might be interested in. It's not
(28:03):
clicky like a lot of those storesare. And if you haven't been in
the Little Wars in a few years, like before Vann and them took it
overhead a little bit of them,Van just completely turned it around. It's
such aphere. It's not like acamp. You know, sometimes you walk
in and you just feel like anoutsider. Not in the case at Little
Wars. One of Baton Rouge isHidden Gems right off of Jefferson Highway in
Baton Rouge. Finding them on Instagramat Little Wars br They've got a Facebook
(28:27):
page as well. Make sure you'rechecking them out. Thanks to Little Wars
for being a sponsor of the NightShift who thanks a Little Wars Love You
welcome the Aron House Cookball turn themon up necks. We have the night
Shift perennial losers. You know,their legs have gotten stronger, their hearts
(28:48):
have grown three times the size,and they appear to be okay. Well,
let's take a little break, ladiesand gentle bad and we'll be back
in five. Yeah, we feeleda little stronger since the last time.
We're leveled up even though it's beena little while. Wow, wow,
hey Bill, great job out there, man, you really well. I
know you didn't get on base today, but your effort was astounding. Great
(29:11):
job Bill. People kept telling methat I was, I was, I
was never gonna get to third base, and I um, I didn't know.
You didn't effort? How did youmiss that ball? I can't get
right to you, I mean,right, gee, I might as well
use you as the ball next.To be fair, I'm about the size
of the ball and you kicked itright next time you climb up on attilius
(29:32):
as is that legal? We lookin the rule. Just pour me a
drink, okay, whatever, Well, I'm so angry right now. My
good friends over at rally Cap tookthe liberty of brewing us a beer named
after something that will never truly understand, and that is Victory Formation. And
(29:53):
there's some assessment to be some sortof runic symbols of some sort from this
can. Well. Yes, uh, the good news is a hazy i
PA eight percent alcohol by a volume. Victory Formation is very tasty, even
though we'll never really understand what it'slike. Hey, it's a fifteen to
(30:14):
zero okay, y'all, let's getfree. They still have a chance,
for sure. It's a perfect sportsbrew. Yes, yeah, quench the
first I reckon. When I crankout, my dingers are can just trot
around the base path and watch itwith the dingers. This is a family
sport. We don't want to fuckinglove American football. I get it.
(30:38):
It's like I can read the room, just football man. Fuck. Yeah,
this is actually great. Something happened. It's all bumpa over there.
Yeah, delicious beer. Pelican CraftBrands distributes this throughout the Greater Louisiana area.
Always a fan of bringing delicious craftbeer to the people. To take
(31:02):
notes of Citrus. It's quite delicious. Your palate very astute. Over there.
She worked on her kickball skills likeshe's been working on her beer.
Tom's fault. He missed the ball. Missed the ball. You know the
game works. Why would on thefield back on the field? Let Oh
(31:38):
what does that mean? It willbreak us? That was creepy. Hmm.
All right, so I guess wehave to go this way, right,
we're obviously being let I feel likewe're already kind of pot committed at
this. This is bullshit. Justcome out. Okay, I don't want
to do any stupid riddles. Uh, timbo, are you going to lead
(32:00):
the way here? Of course Iwill, mate. There's a candle it
I can see just fine. I'mgonna homp on jump on my back to
it is dim light. You cannow see just fine. Okay. You
walk through that door, yeah again? This time instead of slamming, it
just sort of and closes behind you. Um, what you've walked into is
(32:22):
uh call it like a sitting room. Right. There's like a couple of
couches and chairs, and there's achandelier filled with candles above you. And
the minute that door closes and thelock slides in your ears or or in
your head, it's hard to tell. You hear an extremely high pitched noise,
(32:45):
just like a wine. If you'veever had tenitis or something. Yeah,
it doesn't hurt, sup, It'slike annoying and there and then it
reaches the point of hurting and andit goes back. Now what it was
that? I don't like that soundat all. Hi, welcome to the
(33:06):
first room in the getaway chamber.Oh, I hate you, I hate
you. Miss minutes, good luck, thank thank you. Okay, this
is guys, it's like room,What do we what do we need to
do? What else is in theroom? Is there anything couches, tables?
No? Is there another door orno? Nothing? Right now,
(33:28):
there's no door. Did that highpitched noise seemed to be coming from anywhere?
I want to Was it inside oroutside of the room? It was?
It was hard to tell if ifit was inside the room or if
it was just inside your head.Definitely couldn't tell if it was coming from
somewhere else. Um, I wouldn'tdo an aricon of check on the couches
(33:49):
and chairs? Okay? Do it? Ah? That is a sorry this
I should have this ready to go. Um that is a fifteen. Okay,
So with a fifteen, Um,I think as soon as you start
(34:10):
looking at these couches and chairs,you realize something's a little off. Not
about the couches and the chairs,you just that high pitched noise. It
got into your head. It wormedits way into your brain a little bit.
So what I want you to dois roll one, die six and
tell about the number is oh boyfour? Nope, roll a different one.
(34:37):
Cry hey three. I'm going tohand you a card to read it.
No one else can read it,and you have to follow the instructions
immediately. Okay, okay, everyoneelse, go ahead and roll it one
day six. I don't like thisin order, please chuck first six one
(35:07):
two, good luck two for tembowow again. You must follow the instructions
immediately. Oh starting now, Well, I don't know what to tell you
(35:30):
all about these chairs and castes overas a goddamn thing, trying to see
what's going on? What are yousaying? What are y'all talking about?
I was trying to check these herecastes, but there's some sort of magic
in this here room. But Idon't know exactly what the magic is.
Why is your voice so deep?Mate? I don't know what you're talking
(35:52):
about. Man, I'm just herein these cushions or else we all become
some pin cushions? Um? Okay, uh why, I don't know that
was a good one, timbo Um. I take out my dagger and I
(36:15):
just start carving open the cushion.What are you doing? I'll take out
my dagger and I'll start carving cushionstoo. What ba dash to Bambo?
What are you doing? I'm followingKesher's lead? But what why does everything
you say start with a bee.Hey, all right, hey Chuck,
(36:37):
you can ignore yours now, okay, Um Chuck, you feel bad you
didn't realize it, um ottilious,but that that high pitched noise, it
was still in your head. You'vejust gotten used to it, and finally
it sort of shuts off and youcan feel like a headache go away,
essentially subsides like it's like unclenching yourjaw after several hours. Castle, are
(37:00):
you seeing anything in these here pillows? Yeah? You guys cut up these
pillows and there's there's lots of goosedown feathers. No, it's quality.
No, this is terrible. Havey'all ever played duck duck? Gray guns?
And my headache is now unbearable?Ah, it seems to me you're
(37:22):
making a lot of rhymes here,yea Castle, you feel sort of your
jaw and clanching your head ache?Tom, why are you speaking of that
stupid John Wayne accident? What JohnWayne accident? He was talking about?
I didn't cowboy timbos, I don'tfully understand what, just don't know this
(37:59):
in my ear? Is this gone? Okay? My ringing's gone to gone?
Why I'm still asking questions so whydid y'all start cutting the pillows?
I got to feel bad about that. Now you were really nice. He
wasn't before. I don't know.I'm just really angry, un welcome and
(38:21):
good Hello gladows. You did great. However, that was a little fast.
That was easy mode. How aboutwe go media? How about shame
rumor? Do we get to goto another room? Oh we'll do it
here. Okay, But the cushions, But the cushions. Everybody roll one
(38:43):
twenty a seventeen for Timbo, seventeenfor Tillius, fifteen six more these?
(39:07):
Oh god, only two of you, Kestrel and Tom Bombo. Feel that
that noise in your head again?Oh fuck, it's back, God damn
bringing in my ears heite. Idon't hear it, man, it's just
you don't have it. Just Idon't reckon h dinging in in in my
(39:29):
ear holes. Look, we justgotta figure this out before this becomes a
bigger problem. Already, do somethingto help us figure this out. Um,
I mean surely, Look, wedon't have to play it. There's
gonna be some way out of here, maybe, right, Yeah, we
shouldn't have to play this game.There has to be another way all right?
Now, why are you both agreeingwith each other like this? Son
(39:51):
of a bitch? Tilias, helpme look around here a little bit,
maybe in the wall, hands helphim view things? Is it is?
Are you playing the repeater? Um? Let's all I say, We're close.
Yeah, I wouldn't do he perceptioncheck on their a bookcase or anything
adorning the walls. Let's say,yeah, I want to see where this
(40:12):
goes? Yes, is there anykind of shelf paraphernalia that is on the
paraphrasing everything? He says, yeah, gosh, that's good enough. Eighteen
as I'm looking on the wall orlike for any secret little like spots.
Yeah, you look through and oh, so weirdly you find a book called
(40:34):
Attilius the first, Oh for realthru you Attilius, come check this out?
The fuck is this? Says Attilius, the first one here? M
hmm, I've never seen this before. Maybe written by one of my ancestors.
What what Attilius are you? Iam the haunted. I go by
(41:00):
no number. No, no,no, that's not a number. If
he's the first, surely you fallsomewhere in there. I'm not a number.
I am a free dragon. Boarda bittilis. Does he find everything
funny? Yes, everything is amusing. Keep asking me these things that I
can't help a laugh, it's it'sit's wild. He's chuckling. God,
(41:23):
everything so humorous, humorous? Thata bone joke. I don't think I
have any bones problem right now,but I do need to get this ringing
taken. Has he taken turtle joke? Drug use this time? This time?
Yes? Not this time. He'sjust high on life, Timbo.
(41:45):
If you found anything, Kestrel's yourringing still going on? Oh no,
I'm good. You're good, Jimbo, you're good. Questions by asking all
these questions, question, what areyou talking about? I'm just a Are
you how are you feeling? Areyou feeling? No? King, I
feel fine, of course you feelfine. You just got all that HB.
You probably feel wonderful. Oh ishe asking a question and then answering
(42:08):
it himself? Um, God,damn, oh no, No, that's
not what's going on exactly. Imean I would tell you, but every
time I go to say it,it's just a stream. You just can't
shut up saying whatever you think.No, it's no, yeah, no,
um obvious. He just has tokeep talking. Figure out what he's
(42:35):
like doing all these things? Areyou an opposite? I cannot get enough
of you right out. Every timeyou say something, you're laughing at it.
Ask you something, and you something. That's the person on your side
of the table. Fuck. I'msorry, Taylor's I really do think you're
(43:01):
funny. I would have it.I knew I was humorous, but I
think he was. Getaway Chamber.I hate this room in your face.
The I take feathers and plug themin my ears so I don't have to
listen to that voice again. Whoa, and I take feathers and put them
(43:22):
in my ears. Okay, weall take feathers and the bookcase just recedes
into the floor, and behind itis an open hallway. I mean yeah,
I mean look, guys, Iknow I didn't figure that out,
but my instincts, I mean,the book gates give something I hate.
There we go, Um, Timbo, you want to lead the way,
(43:43):
absolutely all I do. Hop onAttilius's back. Come on, come on,
Tom, alright, I proceed downthe hallway. You proceed down a
long brick hallway, sort of longerthan it seems like it should be.
Like you feel like you walk Idon't know, maybe one hundred feet before
you actually hit a single room ora single door. Um, and then
(44:07):
you emerge into what is a likea grand dining room. There's um thirty
doors all the way around the exteriorwall and they're numbered one through thirty.
On the table sits a feast ofkind of epic proportions. There's there's everything
(44:30):
you can imagine. I literally grabbedTom by the shirt before he can run,
and I'm kind of like exactly she'slifted me off the ground at this
point and cartoonishly running in place alittle scrums. Incredible. I am famished.
(44:51):
Lucious food sucked behind you. Thehallway it turns into a wall and
you hear you even to the getawaychamber. Room number two, congratulations on
your swift victory. And room numberone. Are you feeling Peckish's quite very
hungry. Always I am two things, but only once you have to guess
(45:16):
me, or you're a dunce.I'm not a vegetable or a meat but
ripened right, I am quite sweetand two things, but only once.
If you don't guess me, you'redunce. Not a vegetable or meat,
(45:37):
but ripened right, I am quitesweet wine ripened right, quite sweet?
Guys, I think it's a riddlemy by author. He's just in h
(46:04):
two things, but only once.I guess we're dunce. That's kind of
a throway line. Not a ventualmeans ripe and rock quiet. See it
could be a grape. Are theregrapes on the table. There are grapes
on the table. There's also wineon the table. I was thinking,
because wine is definitely not a vegetableor meat. But it's both juice.
(46:28):
But I know, yes, butthen it's right like apple and apple juice
at that point also apply. Yeah, but like there's no like, you
can't be wine. Oh you couldbe cider and apple juice. Yeah,
true, you could two things,but only once. There's something there's something
like not like an egg, butmaybe something along those lines of like I
(46:52):
can what can kind of feed youin multiple different states? Water? Ice?
There's both water and ice on thetable. Ripened, ripened, ripened
would not go with that. Man. Yeah, I like eggs, but
but ripened and sweet doesn't work nowand then and raisins are sweet love,
(47:20):
I don't know there raisins on thetable I'll just go grab some raisins real
quick and we can keep talking.It's probably m well, what is on
the table? Can we take alook at the table? Two things but
only once? What is the butonly once? Mean? I think like
once you do something to it thenit can never be that other again,
(47:44):
So water's average because you could refreezewater. Yeah, it's just something that
you would cut peel. I couldbe wrong there. And two things tomatoes
only once. Well with the secondtomatoes, I don't know, not invention.
(48:12):
No, it is a fruit,and there are a lot of debate
over tomatoes. Which one is.Yeah, well, yeah, something like
would go from like sour or sweetor like something that would like it's kind
of blended first, but once itripens, like the taste chaine to taste
a lot of change. Yeah,I mean, but the plantains a lot
(48:35):
of fruits, both straw and berries, all grapes will and it's develop their
sugars at the end. There's somethinglike it's like there's something some sort of
like perfect like yeah, hi,looks like you're struggling with room too.
(49:00):
Do you need the riddle? Butyeah, again, I am two things
but only once. You have toguess me or you're a dunce. I'm
not a vegetable or a meat,but ripe and right, I am quite
sweet. Remember you have one hintyou may use. Okay, what other
foods are on this table? Justtell us run down the foods. There
(49:22):
are so many foods I couldn't possiblylist them. And it feels like every
time you circle the table you're findingmore stuff. Okay, okay, bitch
magic. So we do have ahint. Once ripened, I am quite
(49:44):
sweet. Do we think the dunceline is? I feel like maybe we're
concentrating tore. They just wanted torun mom, I'm still landing there.
I just wanted to pose it tothe group, wanted it to run.
(50:05):
Good call. I mean on twothings, but only once. But like,
I'm not a vegetable or meat,so like that's that's what I'm wondering.
Fruit, Like it's either a fruitor bread. But you can't be
like you can't have ripe bread.How did that become sweet banana bread?
(50:29):
I was kind of thinking, likeI was. I was kind of thinking
banana as well, but I justit was great banana bread. Thirteen Because
when bananas become really ripe. Theyget put into banana breadana bread. You
(50:50):
can't take it back, to takeit back like it's only once you're making
a band of bread. You're notgetting a banana again. That's a good
point. Well, you got downthe sort of agricultural issues here. Is
it a food? Is it food? Maybe Tom's our pet? Oh?
(51:13):
Okay, unnecessary? Okay, focusyour energy, morse on solution orients clever
energy to find our solar. I'mokay, are we redound? As for
hinting? Guys? Ripened? Right? I guess is there a wrong way
to ripen something? Are we like? Is there's are we trying to are
we trying to write? Is thissomething that people are giving the bed?
(51:37):
Is he really that clever? Heis not? I think I think I'm
think I'm focusing on the ripened.Okay, do you want to do the
hindo? Let's do the Yeah,it can't be well, we probably Yeah,
they're on the table you hey,anything che he's gonna says on the
(52:00):
table right cigarettes tobacco. They startstobacco. Okay, you're gonna pick something
up. You're gonna pick something up. We're gonna be a dunce. I
mean, I don't know consequences.I don't want to be a dunce,
(52:22):
to be clear. That could becould be, that could be like a
little classic evil wizard understatement. Andno, you're a dunce and here's an
infernal demon. I don't. Let'sjust if we're gonna touch something on the
table, I would vote maybe drinksome wine then at least get Okay,
no you kind of hi No,I would say we take the hint before
(52:45):
we touch anything on the time.All right, damn robot lady, root
lady. Hi, seems like you'rehaving some trouble. Would you like to
use your hands? One? Yeah, that's a touch stone for yes?
(53:06):
Yeah, yes, great, happyto help. So, um, what
is two of one? Thing calleda par I hate everything? It was
word play. We should have knownit. It was always it's always word
(53:28):
for it. It's always a punI hate everything. Um, okay,
Castrol takes up, walks over andgrabs a pair. Yeah. As as
soon as you pick up the pair, what pick it up? Throws it
at the wall and throw it upthe wall? Why not? Okay?
That's fun? Uh? What elsewould you like to do? I guess
(53:52):
I'll grab a pair as well.Yeah, yeah, I'll grab a pair
and I'll bite it. Yeah,I'll bite it it. I'll eat the
damn. Yeah, I'm gonna followyou all go pa, bide in the
parents, and I got a pairof dse for you. It's progressively.
(54:16):
Do you have an inspiration? Diesnot with me currently. I think I
may like I think I do inmy base at home. I'm not sure,
but yeah, I go ahead andtouch whatever. All right. When
the last of you picks up thelast pair, you can you see that
there's a little key beneath that lastpair. Is there a number by the
(54:38):
pair? Uh? There's not.But when you pick up the key,
you hear, great job, yousolved it. But with only a little
help. It's kind of a lot. But when my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twiceas old as me. My age
(55:00):
is my door. Oh math,y'all have this one. My brain will
lock up. Thirty one I waseight, he's twice. It's place is
old. Oh no, I youhave an idea. No, I'm not
(55:22):
good at math. Yeah, it'snot gonna be math. Right, there's
no trying to figure it out.There's a riddle. This is a riddle,
it's not a math problem. Soundslike math to me. Well,
I mean when my father was thirtyone, I was eight, robot lady,
(55:46):
could you repeat it? Sure?When my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twiceas old as me. My age is
my door, My age is mydoor. Twice as old as her he
was thirty one, but we don'tknow how much time hath Oh wait,
(56:10):
okay, age is so it's oneth thirty's killing me? Now he's twice
as old as me. M um, oh it is math. Yeah,
(56:31):
it's always a ready. Um.So they're twenty three years apart. Uh
is that what it is? Soif she's fIF fifteen, yeah, okay,
yeah so uh so door number thenokay, so she's fifteen, now
(56:51):
he's twice as old as me.Like, no, no, no,
no, she's twenty three, she'stwenty three, twenty three years apart.
Well, but it's she's twice asold, so twenty yes, no,
I know what I'm saying. Okay, So he plays fifteen is twenty three
if thirty one plus fifteen is fortysix, So she's twenty three, right,
(57:14):
forty six and twenty three works infifteen years. Right, So then
she's twenty three years old, sothey age. Is the door door twenty
three? Right? He was thirtyone twos eight, if she's twenty three,
twenty three years, separate them.He's forty six, Yes, that's
twenty three and forty six half six, we got twenty three. Yes,
(57:37):
with the key, and I giveit a little jiggle, jiggle thinking with
the key, with the key.Okay, it doesn't fold, I hope,
but it doesn't fold. Yeah,I hope it doesn't fold. O,
No, I got you all um, Yeah, you don't get this
is gonna make so much sense,like nine months passes. Yeah, it's
(58:05):
actually from a Louis throw in.You throw great documentary on if you're a
huge nerd like man. Yea.So it is jingle jingle though, is
it really? Yeah? Because it'sloose changes your poet, my money don't
jingle jingle because it's not changed.It folds because it's not a bills right
now, you're right, all right, let's move all right, dollar bills.
I don't carry coins. You knowwhat I carry? It does fold
(58:25):
you turn the key in the foldsdown again. It's magic. He can
do whatever we want I mean,the world is opened it. Let's do
it about I'll put it in mynotes door fold, remember that jingle door
fold. It is funny. Hedidn't realize it was a math question,
(58:46):
but he is the one that kindof figured it out. No one who
can do math, you realize Iwasn't going to do it. To do
it my pen not any different thannormal. But that's like a content I
never really thought about before. Right, is like somebody being three times your
(59:06):
age and then you go the sameamount of time and they're only double your
age and only for one year.Yeah, it's weird. That's how math
works. Know what I'm saying.I don't under I do not understand that.
Like my brain. I'm a writer, not a Well, hey,
here's the good idea. You canstart writing during the session. What do
(59:29):
you think of that solid burn?Next time on night shift thirteen? Damage?
So yeah, let's say you turnall the way around and just lop
(59:50):
this one's head off, Yeah,into the ground. Body sort of collapses
over over the head in fact um, what else? How cool do I
look doing that? Team? Fuckingbadass? Dude, you gutted one and
then chopped the head off the other. While spinning, then yeah, m hm
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