Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, I'm Wendy, and this is Divorce Doesn't Suck. I'm
talking all about the life you can live after divorce.
You'll hear regular people's stories about their divorces and how
they reinvented themselves and grew. You'll also get invaluable advice
from experts who serve in the divorce community. A little
about me, I'm a former TV producer and mom of two.
I got divorced in two thousand and eight when there
were really no outlets or platforms for me to turn to.
(00:22):
So I'm paying it forward and have created a platform
to help men and women learn that there absolutely is
a fresh, new and exciting life after divorce. Come with
me on this journey and paint your brand new blank
canvas of happily ever after divorce. This episode is brought
to in part by the Needle Kuda Law Firm Guidance
that Moves Lives Forward. My guest today is a relationship
(00:43):
coach who supports people in getting over their exes, healing
from heartbreak, and moving on to a life they love.
And I love that so much because she's everything that
my show is. She's here to share her story and
how she supports and helps her clients with a holistic approach,
which I also love. This is Divorced Us and Stuck
and Wendy Sloan and your host and my guest is
Lucy Price.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Hi, how are you.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
I'm so happy to have you, your cheery self, Your
everything about you is happy.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
I try to be.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
There's like no way that you're sharing your story about
what happened to you and this is who you are
today because I can't even see it.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
It's one of those things that I think.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
I'm a very big feeling person and I often think
to myself like part of why I think I can
be so cheery and I can't be so bright.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Is because I do know what the other depth of
emotion is.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
I do know what it's like to have the full
spectrum of emotions, and I feel like I've kind of
come out the other side of it and I'm able
to this might sound a little cliche, but choose happiness
a bit more now and know how to center my
life around feeling fulfilled and feeling happy. So I don't know,
it feels it feels easy to be a bit chipper,
(01:57):
but I was in all this way.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Let me tell you, I love what you said, to
choose happiness, Yeah, because we all have a choice, right,
we all have a choice. And I've always said this
in as long as I can remember. You can't be
happy with somebody else less you're happy with yourself too.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Right, Absolutely, I one hundred percent agree.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
I think that, you know, emotions are nuanced and everything
like that, But there's so much we can do to
support our own happiness and our own fulfillment that I
don't think we even realize most of the time, because
we get so caught up with things that are going
on in our lives or at work or in the media,
and it can really distract us and deregulate us. But
(02:41):
there's choice in that as well, choice of you know,
doing the things you know that support you or ground
you or lifts you. And so I've really, over the
last few years, have made such a concerted effort to
choose happiness in my own life, and it's made such
a difference in terms of, I mean everything, my own
personal fulfillment, how I see myself, how I see the world.
(03:03):
But I do think there's a fair amoument choice in that.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Okay, you're going to walk us through that journey of
how you got there. But first, can we start with
your story, because, like I said from the beginning, I
can't imagine you being in an on and off of
relationship with someone who didn't want to I'll let you
tell your story. You tell your story, and how old
you were and all that stuff.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
Absolutely, So.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
It was my young twenties at the time, and I
was working in corporate America. I was working a marketing
job at the time, and that was really stressful and
all encompassing. And during that time, I started a relationship
with a man that lasted for I would say about
two or three years. Timeline is a little hazy there,
(03:49):
but I would say definitely two years. And it was
one of those relationships that everything you said of he
didn't want to commit, but he didn't want.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
To let me go. I always thought back, and at
best it was an anxious, avoidant relationship.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
At worst, I kind of look back and see all
the love bombing that happened, all the ways in which
you know, emotional manipulation happened, and it really really hurt
me in so many ways. It shot my confidence, It
made me second guests who I was and my worth
and my value. It made me consider what I believed
(04:26):
about relationships, because this is someone who I was really
attached to, and I gave up so much of myself
to make the relationship work and be who he wanted
me to be, only to find out, you know, from
a left open epad, that he was seeing other people
and he wasn't being honest with me. And it's so
(04:50):
difficult in those situations to not allow yourself to slip
into feeling bad about yourself and blaming yourself and thinking,
how could I be so stupid? How could I not
see this coming? Because I would think that so many times,
but I would still go back to the relationship until
it got to a point where those messages flashed up
(05:10):
on the iPad. I'm like, oh, you're You're just straight
up being dishonest with me and cheating on me. And
I can't keep going back into this relationship because I
don't recognize myself anymore.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
And it took a lot of time to get to
that point.
Speaker 3 (05:28):
I let so much of myself waste away before getting
to that point. And around that time, there was a
lot of things going on in my professional life, a
lot of things other things going on in my personal
life that I just had a moment of wanting to
pause and change everything. So I ended up cutting off
that relationship, which was one of the hardest things that
(05:51):
I had to do, but I'm so glad I did
it in hindsight.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
In the moment, it was as torturous.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
And I ended up as well quitting my marketing job
and going and pursuing a yoga teacher training in the
mountains of Massachusetts.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
For a mind I loved that about that storry. Yeah,
I know, it feels very eper in love. And during
that journey, I.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Learned so much more about connecting to myself and that's
what started my holistic approach to health and wellness because
after getting my yoga teacher certificate, I then pursued teaching
different fitness classes. I got different certifications in that realm,
which led me to health coaching, and then the rest
is kind of history. From there, I ended up niching
(06:37):
down a little bit more into relationships after going through
my own healing, after hiring my own coaches and finding
what a difference that made in my life, and I
just had to support other people with the same thing.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
So let's go back to the moment that you.
Speaker 1 (06:54):
Knew or that you got when you knew you had
to get out, when you had to make a break.
And also the other that I want to ask you
is what was it about? What was it about it
that you stayed?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Was it? So the moment itself, I'll lock you through
the exact sequence of events.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
So I saw these messages flash up on his iPad
that he just left out one day and I was
at his place and he was at work, you know,
he wasn't there, and these messages popped up, and I
just remember my blood going cold, and all I could
think to myself in that moment is like, how could
you be so stupid?
Speaker 2 (07:32):
Like how could you not see this?
Speaker 3 (07:34):
I look back in that moment with so much more
compassion now, But when I was in that moment, that's all.
Speaker 2 (07:39):
I could think to myself is like, how could you?
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Like, He's shown you time and time again who he
is and you're choosing not to see it at this point,
And here's the evidence right in front of you.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
So what are you going to do with it?
Speaker 3 (07:50):
So I saw those messages, like all of my things together,
I ended up getting in my car and I just
drove to a parking garage. I didn't even really have
like a direction to go with that point. And I
called a dear friend of mine and I just start crying,
and all I could say to her is like, he's
never going to choose me, and I just kind of
she talked me through a blesser, but that's all I
(08:12):
kept think to myself, Like he's never going to choose me.
He's he's shown me time and time again for the
past two years that he doesn't want to commit to this,
and as soon as I pull away, he fumbles over himself.
And then I believe him and think that things are
going to be better and think that things are going.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
To he's going to try harder, and he's just never
going to choose me.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
And it was just something about sitting in that parking garage,
crying to myself, crying over a man who I told
myself a million times that I wasn't going to do that,
Just like something just clicked. It's hard to explain, but
it was just this like deep inner knowing settling in
that I had to leave that relationship otherwise like so
(08:52):
much more of myself was going to be lost.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
So that was the moment.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
It was just like a clicking in That's That's the
only way I can describe it, because so there have
been so many instances before where I knew that I
should leave the relationship and I did it, But it
was just something about that that clicked in.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
So hard for so many people to do that.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
They see the proof, they see the evidence, they see it,
it's right in front of them, but they can't see it.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
I never see it.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
Yeah, And you asked, you know what made me stay
or what made it so hard to leave?
Speaker 2 (09:31):
I think back to two things in particular. The first
was there was just this connection I.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Had with him that I had not had with someone
else before, and there was an allure about him. There's
a charm about him. He was and still is, you know,
as far as I know. I haven't been in contact
with him for years. But he was so intelligent and
driven and ambitious, and he did well in his career,
(10:01):
and in moments of vulnerability, he was kind to me.
And that made it so confusing to look back and
be like, here are all these moments in which you're
kind in your compassion, and here are all these ways
in which you're a good person, and how is this
not matching the experience that I'm having. How can I
(10:21):
look it back at this on paper and it be
so different than what I'm actually engaging with, and it
really confused me. I would also say that I was
attached to the potential future, attached to who he could be,
and attached to the future I thought that I could
have with him, and that was difficult to entangle from
(10:42):
as well, because after a certain point, I think the
sub cost fallacy kicks in and You're like, I've invested
all this time and to.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
This person, all this energy into this person.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
I've really tried to make this work, and walking away
feels so challenging because it feels like all of that
time or energy would have been from nothing at that point,
and I very much felt that and the relationship with him,
I felt like I'd sacrificed so much at that point
to make it work that for to not work was
(11:13):
devastating for me.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
At that point.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
A world like it's unbelievable your story because I can
see what you're saying, I visualize it, and I'm like, well,
as you're saying it, I'm like living in your life,
Like everything looks so perfect here and all the boxes
are checking and all this is wonderful, but but yeah,
and good for you to be so brave to walk
(11:42):
away and know that you're choosing your own happiness and
you're choosing yourself.
Speaker 3 (11:47):
And I think that that's when I tell my story.
What I appreciate is that I think it resonates with
so many people, because so many people have that moment
when either the person that they're dating and they're trying
to move on from, either has all these paper good
qualities but it's not matching the experience, or they can
(12:08):
look back and see these moments but it's not matching
the current reality, or there's just this perception of this
person being a good person that not matching their experience.
And I think that's so challenging. Your mind gets so
muddied in those moments of what's reality, what's the truth?
Am I being dramatic? Am I not giving the benefit
(12:30):
of the doubt enough? And it can be so confusing.
And all I can say is like, I'm so glad
I trusted myself when I did, because otherwise I think
that I wouldn't be where I am.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
And now you want to make a difference helping other people,
We're going to take quick break with one of our
sponsors for a commercial talking to Lucy Price. She's a breakup,
recovery and relationship coach. Her story is one like so
many out there. They're listening now that just needs to
be able to choose themselves and choose happiness.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
And it's hard, it's not easy.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
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(13:46):
and save fifty percent on your device. We're back so
how do you what's practical ways for someone to build
self love, self trust, confidence when you feel rejected because
it's so difficult.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
It's so difficult, And one of the first things I'll
say is we've got to be really curious about what
we're making different things mean.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
So one of the things I.
Speaker 3 (14:11):
Tell my clients and they start saying to me, like,
I feel like I hear you my voice of what
am I making this mean? But like when you have
different things pop up, when you're you know, scrolling through
Instagram and you see your ex pop up, or when
you're chatting with a mutual friend and they come up
in conversation and you start, you know, feeling all of
these ways, having all these thoughts, just getting curious and like,
(14:32):
what are you making different things mean?
Speaker 2 (14:33):
What are you making the breakup mean? What are you
making being single mean?
Speaker 3 (14:37):
What are you making this emotion mean about you? About
where you're at, about your worth, about your value? And
getting really curious about your thoughts and your beliefs. At
the end of the day, Like when I really come
back to what my personal core self love practice is,
it's it's thought work, it's belief work, It's what are
(14:59):
your beliefs about your and what are your beliefs about
your place in the world and your.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Value and what you deserve?
Speaker 3 (15:06):
And so I would encourage to get very quiet and
curious with compassion, always leaving with compassion and asking like,
what do I believe about myself? What are my thoughts?
What are my perceptions of myself? And how is that
impacting how I'm feeling? How is that impacting how I'm
showing up, and how is that impacting my choices or
(15:29):
what I'm accepting in my life. So for me, during
that time when I got quiet, when I got curious,
there was some part of me that felt that I
didn't deserve a healthy relationship. And that's an umbrella term.
There are specific things within there. But I had that
belief and so I had to start looking at it
(15:51):
and working at.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Okay, how can I shift this belief system.
Speaker 3 (15:55):
So how I did it was a method that's called
the better thinking feeling thought. And part of why I
love this practice is because when I would do affirmation work,
when I would do things like I'm beautiful, I'm enough,
I'm you know, spectacular and ambitious, and pick something, I
(16:15):
noticed that you are all that right, right, I am
all that, but like at the time.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
I never believed it.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
It was so far out of my realm of belief
that never landed or resonated with me. And I learned
over time, just through different aspects of you know, thought
work and how the brain works, is if the brain
belief something is so far out of the realm of possibility,
it'll be hard to anchor into that belief. It's kind
of like an uphill battle. But if you can start
(16:44):
to shift that belief just a little bit, so going
from you know, like I'm not good enough for a
good relationship, to hey, people like me have gotten into
good relationships, so maybe I can get into a good
relationship too, to then stare stepping in again, better thinking, feeling,
thoughting again to I think I'm a decent person. That
(17:04):
means I'm capable of a decent relationship, and just continue
to stare step.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Up the belief.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
That worked way more for me than the affirmation work did,
and it was simply because it was just a bit
more believable to my brain.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
So I could practice that belief.
Speaker 3 (17:21):
I could practice telling myself that when I was in
these low moments, when I was feeding myself up when
I didn't feel good enough, I could tell myself I'm
a decent person, to then stairstep again to I'm a
good person sometimes, you know, until you get to the
point where you're like, yeah, I am a good person
and I deserve for things. But stairstepping it is one
of those thought practices that I would highly recommend if
(17:43):
you feel like the affirmation work isn't working for you,
because it's a little easier for your brain to anchor
into and believe.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Interesting.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
So your story, I mean, I hate to say that
I love your story, but I love your story because
you are. If that hadn't happened, that relationship hadn't happened,
you wouldn't be the Lucy Price you are today. You
wouldn't doing the work that you're doing today. You would
be struck in that marketing job, maybe love it, maybe not,
but you wouldn't be the relationship motivational speaker coach that
(18:16):
you are today and fulfilled and happy and bright and
positive and choosing happiness. And I'm going to keep saying
that over and over again and choosing yourself because I
love that.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
I really, deeply in my bones believe that we can
take our breakups and our divorces and turn them into
our breakthroughs, because it's a moment in time where there's
a shift, there's an opportunity for you to see yourself
and life from a different perspective. There's an opportunity to
rearrange your life again in a way that supports you
(18:49):
and uplifts you and it motivates you. And that's what
happened for me. You know, I was in my breakdown.
I was in a moment where I felt my world
crumbling a part. I didn't know what the future help
for me, and I had just invested two years into
a relationship with a man that didn't want anything back
with me in a way that I wanted. And I
(19:10):
was in a career that you know, paid well but
wasn't what I ultimately wanted to do, and I had options.
I had a moment where I was I really got
quiet myself and I realized, you know what, I can
change this. I can do something about this. I don't
have to work this job, I you know, And at
that time, I'm so blessed, like I had really intentionally
(19:32):
saved and I had a safety net. And it's not
that I didn't plan any of these changes.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
But I really got quite.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
I was like, you know what, Lucy, you don't have
to do this, No one is forcing you to do this,
So what do you want to do? And through that,
I think that I realized, you know what, I can
do a different career. I can have a different relationship.
I can better my relationship with myself. I can arrange
my life to fulfill me and to know and to
(20:00):
support me. And I can give myself permission to do that.
And that's when I had my breakthroughs, you know, is
from just realizing that there was so much choice I had.
I had so much say in my life, but I
was convincing myself that I didn't. And I think that's
what we do as people. We convince ourselves that we
don't have a choice, that we have to keep going
(20:22):
the way that we've been going, that we have to
keep living the way we've been living because that's what
we've been told by our parents, our teachers, our society,
our bosses, that's what we're so used to and accustomed
to that we haven't thought of doing anything different. But
we have choice and agency. And when you take that choice,
when you really think, what do I want for myself
(20:43):
and how can I arrange my life to get that?
Speaker 2 (20:46):
It all becomes way more possible for you.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Amazing, and you say you can you have techniques to
support your clients and getting over their X.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
In three months or less.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Yes, look, and it's always you know, unique to the person,
but most of my clients when they come and work
with me, it's a relationship that's really been sticky for
them to get over, and most of them get over
their ACCESS in three months or less.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Well, I think just hearing your story alone can help
somebody you know, move on because you hear everything that
you went through and you're like, Wow, she can do it,
and she can choose herself and just this alone. So
how do you know when you're ready to start dating
again and clear being clear on what you want in
a relationship this time.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Yeah. So there's a few different things that I look
for in terms of being ready to date again. And
the first one's going to seem so simple, but do
you actually have desire to start dating again? I think
sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves to start
dating again. A lot of my clients know who are
in their thirties who want families a lot of pressure
starts kicking in just due to biological factors, and so
(21:58):
there's this element of of do you desire it that
I think we have to scan for.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Do you want to whether.
Speaker 3 (22:04):
That's for connection, whether that's for just you know, starting
to get back out there again, whether that's for practice.
But is there an actual desire there to start dating again?
So I start looking for that first. The second thing
I'll start looking for is do your emotions around your
ex feel lighter or still quite heavy? And that's one
(22:27):
of the ones that I think is a little nuanced
for folks. But if every time you think about your
ex it's super heavy still, you find yourself unable to
focus for hours, you can't get your mind straight again
because all of this emotional turmoil is.
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Coming up in your body, then maybe you're not ready
to date yet. And that's okay.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
You know you don't have to be ready to date yet.
You get to take your time healing too. The other
thing I start looking for is when you do think
about your ex, what is the charge around those thoughts?
Speaker 2 (23:00):
So can you think about your AX and let it go?
Speaker 3 (23:03):
Are you thinking about your X and then having a
running list of why you're never going to find somebody,
or why you're not good enough or why you know
guys suck or whatever it is, Or are you able
to have a thought about your X and then kind
of think about other things and continue with your day.
So do you want to date? How are the feelings
around your ex? Does it feel less charged? And then
when you do think about your ex, can you recenter
(23:25):
your mind and focus on other things?
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Again makes a lot of sense. So tell us about
Lucy Price today. Lucy Price today, that's over her ex,
that's not in the marketing job, that is filling her
life with as a relationship coach, motivation speaker, breakup recovery coach,
helping people making a difference. Lucy today.
Speaker 3 (23:48):
Yeah, so if you can believe that today is actually
my anniversary. Yeah, So, I've now been with my current
partner for five years and if you told me that,
you know, eight years ago, I'm not believed you that
I could have this healthy, fulfilling partnership. And that has
been one of the biggest blessings, not just having him
(24:11):
in my life, not just dating him, but knowing that
I am a good partner too. And that might sound
a little silly, but I had my own stuff to
clean up too. I had my own you know, baggage
to work through. So the fact that I can stand
here today and like so solidly say I've been in
the healthiest relationship with someone I am madly in love
with and I could not imagine, you know, anything else
(24:34):
at this point, Like that wouldn't have happened eight years ago.
So personally, that's kind of the joy that I've gotten to.
My relationship with myself has never been better. You know,
I was someone who struggled, as so many women, with
body image, with how I thought about myself, how I
thought about my abilities and my personality, and I was
(24:57):
so harsh on myself. And today none of that is
in the world. Today, I feel so confident in who
I am. I put myself out there. I know in
my bones, you know, the message that I want to
speak into the world, and I want to support people
with and again, like if you had told me that
eight years ago, I wouldn't have believed you. And then
with my work, I'm so blessed, you know, I get
(25:18):
to support people through some of the most challenging situations
in their life and watch them come out the other side.
And watch them choose themselves and support themselves in new ways.
And you know a lot of my clients right now
are also dating and also meeting new people, and so
that's a fund switch in our conversations around the X
(25:39):
to them dating again. So I just feel so incredibly
blessed with my life. But I wouldn't be here, you know.
It's one of those hard things like if I wouldn't
be here if that hadn't happened, and if I hadn't
gone through that experience. And you know, there are times
in my life where I wish I could have forgotten
it or it didn't happen.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
And now it's just.
Speaker 3 (26:00):
A part of my story and it led me to
this beautiful place today and I'm ultimately very very grateful
for that.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
It's amazing you speak with wisdom beyond your years, but
you speak with like looking at you, you would never
know that your journey had the bumps in the road
that it did, Yeah, and that you had baggage, because
you are such a ray of sunshine.
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Seriously, I feel like, go ahead, sorry, so you go,
you go. I was gonna say it's kind of it's.
Speaker 3 (26:35):
Kind of funny, but this is getting into names now,
like that you know, back in high school where everyone's like,
what does your name mean? Well, my name means light,
like the Latin route is light. And as soon as
I found out that when I was like sixteen years old,
I endeavored to be that in my life. Some moments
better than others, I was light. But it's just funny
(26:56):
because I do try to bring that energy. I don't know,
I think the world can be having sometimes and we
need levity sometimes, so I try to bring that into
the room.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Oh you absolutely do you shine. And I love that
you know that you talk about being someone's authentic self,
your self, love, the healing, the journey of again, like
choosing yourself, choosing happiness that you there. There is a choice,
and it's not always easy to see it right away,
but I think the way you're guiding people through your
(27:30):
own journey, it's everything my show is, and it's everything
that we want to bring to people that are that
are listening and that are going through something, whether it's
a breakup, whether it's a divorce, whether it's a loss,
whether whether they're struggling in their life.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
It's I really love that part of your show, all
the different stories that come through through your guests, because
I think that stories are very healing, and that when
we share our stories, we present an opportunity for someone
else to see themselves in us, to see our strength
and have their own strength be reflected back to them,
(28:05):
to see our courage and find courage within themselves. I
think we very much underestimate the power of stories, and
that's why I like to share mine. And I'm so
grateful that so many other beautiful guests have come on
your show and shared theirs Because something's going to relate
to somebody and hit their ears in the exact right
(28:28):
way at the right time to find a moment to
grow and to make a different choice in their life.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
And I really think that's powerful.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
I think that's what I felt was missing when I
started the podcast. I'm like, people, don't I don't do
what he said, she said, I don't pink, don't. It's
basically like, share your story so you can help somebody
else get through it, even if you're still struggling. But
then somebody else knows that they're not struggling alone and
that somebody else out they're struggling with them. So I'm
(28:57):
so happy. So was it difficult for you to venture
out and start to date again after that? Did it
take you? Took a lot of healing time and then
how did you even begin the process?
Speaker 2 (29:08):
Oh, it was so difficult. Yeah, it was so challenging.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
I went back into the world of dating through dating apps,
which I hadn't done before.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
But that was a whole may say that's the way
life is now.
Speaker 3 (29:25):
Yeah, and that's okay, this is my brain getting little nerdy.
I always like to say to people, that's so different,
and you don't have to use dating apps. Like dating
apps are such a new thing within the last twenty
twenty five years. There are a thousand ways to meet
people other than dating apps, and people have been doing
it for hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years.
Speaker 2 (29:46):
So you do not need to be on dating apps
to date again.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
However, I like the comfort of swiping on my phone
on my couch and seeing if there's someone out there.
Speaker 2 (29:55):
So that's what I did. That's what I did, and
I you know, I can't say every date I went
on was.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
What is it a home run or anything like that,
but I think what it allowed me to do was
it was it allowed me to represent myself in my
newfound confidence in my new life that I've created for
myself to people who don't know my entire history, who
knew the version of me now, and that was so
(30:25):
fun for me. It was so fun to meet people
who didn't know me for like five ten years, but
people who were meeting for the first time and being
able to see like a connection from that place. I
struggled mostly with getting to the point of feeling ready
to date.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
That was my crux.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Was kind of I like, when this happy personality came out,
it took effort, Like I really really want to state
how much effort it took for me to become a happy,
bubbly person because that's not how I felt at all
at the time. I really struggled with deep anxiety, deep depression,
(31:05):
and I got a lot of support for that from
a lot of different people that I hired to support me.
And it took me, I would say, a good year
after the breakup to be able to think about my ex.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
And not seethe for the rest of the day.
Speaker 3 (31:21):
So for me, the big, big effort was just getting
to a point where I was emotionally and mentally grounded
enough and wasn't like feeling like I was bringing any
pass baggage into dating. So that's when I say, like,
when those feelings become less charged, you're more ready. So
for me, that was the big effort the dating apps
that going out on dates. I had done so much
(31:44):
work to build up my self love and self confidence
that I was nervous for dates. Don't get me wrong,
but I wasn't going into them thinking, oh, if they
don't like me, it's my fault. I definitely was able
to start switching the conversation within myself to do I
like them? Are they a good fit for me? Are
they what I'm looking for?
Speaker 2 (32:05):
Not? Am I what they're looking for? And that made
a massive difference in terms of my confidence.
Speaker 3 (32:10):
And it was actually through the dating apps that I
kind of realize that.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
I didn't want.
Speaker 3 (32:19):
To use the dating apps per se. I really liked
dating apps, but there was too much I felt like
there were too much games at the start for my liking.
It was a lot of like trying to figure out
texting to go on the first day, and for me, like,
there's I've when I talk to my clients now, I
kind of talk them through how to avoid a lot
(32:39):
of the mess that I dealt with when I was
on dating apps and how to like shorten the dating
process on the apps and make.
Speaker 2 (32:46):
It more pleasant. But at the time I didn't necessarily
have those skills.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
So I started letting go of the apps and doing
more of the mixers, and I ended up meeting my
now partner on a wedding that I had gotten invited
to like a week prior and wasn't even going to go,
but ended up going and he happened to be there,
and kind of like the rest is history from that story,
but it was. It was one of those things that
(33:10):
I I'm glad I went through the experience because it
also showed me how to choose to date and to
love again, like if that was a conscious choice in
and of itself too, and that was quite healing for me.
Speaker 1 (33:26):
Amazing, what a story. It's a great story, your story.
Thank you for sharing it. And so how can people
get in touch with you and your coaching services? You
want to tell us a little bit about that, I'll
have it all though, absolutely absolutely so.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
You can find me on Instagram and TikTok at Lucy
dot m dot price. You can also find me through
my website and all my socials are on there through
Shift Yourstory dot net, and then you can come hang
out with me on my podcast as well at breakups
and breakthroughs.
Speaker 1 (33:58):
I love it. I love shift your Shift your Story
because because that's exactly what you did.
Speaker 3 (34:03):
Yeah, and that's very much how I see it, you know,
shifting the story or telling yourself, shifting what you're making
things mean, and often just shifting it a little bit
at a time. I think we write off the small movements,
but if anybody's read atomic habits like, it's those one
percent changes, it's those tiny changes day after day that
make a massive difference in our lives. So I'm very
(34:26):
much about shifting. I love it, and thank you so
much for being here.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
Lucy.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
You're a ray of sunshine and light for sure. Any time, anytime,
come back.
Speaker 2 (34:37):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (34:39):
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