May 13, 2025 • 38 mins
Maura Eliza is is a traditional naturopath, who developed her signature method for helping women heal divorce trauma so they can share their stories without crying. She loves to teach women that feeling better is closer than they think and their experience can help them discover self love.
Maura began her journey in natural health because doctors didn't have answers for my digestive issues. Along the way, I learned that emotions affect the physical body too. After her divorce, she knew that it was essential to heal emotionally in order to battle the adrenal fatigue she had been experiencing. She learned about German New Medicine and found out that symptoms are a "START HERE" sign for your personal growth.
Listen in to here and learn more about the connection between symptoms (even chronic symptoms and diagnosis) and relationship chaos. Our bodies are always trying to help us, but we don't always understand what the body is saying.
Learn all about her signature "The Vibrant Way"
Learn more about Maura here:
Instagram: @flex.health.with.maura
TheVibrantWay.com
Maura began her journey in natural health because doctors didn't have answers for my digestive issues. Along the way, I learned that emotions affect the physical body too. After her divorce, she knew that it was essential to heal emotionally in order to battle the adrenal fatigue she had been experiencing. She learned about German New Medicine and found out that symptoms are a "START HERE" sign for your personal growth.
Listen in to here and learn more about the connection between symptoms (even chronic symptoms and diagnosis) and relationship chaos. Our bodies are always trying to help us, but we don't always understand what the body is saying.
Learn all about her signature "The Vibrant Way"
Learn more about Maura here:
Instagram: @flex.health.with.maura
TheVibrantWay.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, I'm Wendy, and this is Divorce Doesn't Suck. I'm
talking all about the life you can live after divorce.
You'll hear regular people's stories about their divorces and how
they reinvented themselves and grew. You'll also get invaluable advice
from experts who serve in the divorce community. A little
about me. I'm a former TV producer and mom of two.
I got divorced in two thousand and eight when there
were really no outlets or platforms for me to turn to.
(00:22):
So I'm paying it forward and have created a platform
to help men and women learn that there absolutely is
a fresh, new and exciting life after divorce. Come with
me on this journey and paint your brand new blank
canvas of happily ever after divorce. This episode is brought
to in part by the Needle Kuda Law Firm guidance
that Moves lives forward. Welcome to another episode of Divorce
(00:43):
Doesn't Suck. I'm your host, Wendy Sloan and my guests
today named the Vibrant Way. She is a traditional natriopath
who developed her signature method for helping women heal from
divorce trauma so they can they can go into a
place where they can share their story without crying. I
love that and I've never heard that. I never heard
(01:04):
it like that before. Welcome to my show, Maura, Eliza.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Thank you so much for being here. And right off
the bat, tell us, what is a traditional natriopath?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Oh, so, a naturopath is a person who helps somebody
with their health educate through education. The mds that you
see those are called allopaths. They use allopathic medicine, and
naturopath uses natural medicine, so they would know about how
to keep the body healthy as opposed to just responding
when you're sick. And there's really two different kinds of
(01:40):
natural paths. There's naturopathic doctors and they can do more
diagnosing and prescribing, but a traditional naturopath is more folks
centered on education and helping you understand holistically what keeps
you healthy body, mind, and spirit. That's and so we're
kind of more along the lines of traditional traditional health
(02:04):
health strategies that have been used for hundreds, if not
thousands of years.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Okay, this is like right up, my alliance, something I
love so much because I always say, like we got
to get to the root of the problem. Like you
go to a doctor and you have a call, they
give you this, and they just like treat the symptoms,
but they don't get to the root of it, right, Yeah,
So I feel like that's what you do. You get
to the root of it.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, and well, there's a lot of natural providers that
kind of use an allopathic model where they are you know,
maybe they're trying to lower your cholesterol and they're going
to do it with a supplement or an herb or
something like that in or maybe even dietaria changes rather
than getting to the root of understanding that cholesterol is
(02:46):
actually a protective mechanism for the body. It's like the
healing band aid. And so we got to understand like
what is causing the body to think that it needs
to elevate the cholesterol. It's also essential in creating your
hormones sonderstanding that cholesterol is good. It's the raw materials
for a lot of functions in your body, and like
(03:06):
what is going on with it being kind of out
of the normal range. That's what we would be looking at.
So interesting.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Okay, so let's back up just a little bit. How
did you get started in natural health.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
I got started in natural health when I was having
digestive issues and I went to see an allopathic doctor,
your regular doctor that's on your insurance, and they're like,
we don't know what's going on. They offered to stick
a camera up my booty. I was like, no, thank you,
and that was the best that they had to offer me.
And I had already on my own noticed that some
dietary changes were it would help it. But when I
(03:40):
went home and actually started looking in all, you know,
I actually started in some Facebook groups. I learned about charlotics,
I learned about digestive enzymes. I learned about all kinds
of things, and I was like, why you might have
to tell me about any of this stuff? Like they
didn't even ask. So I got it started on, you know,
realize that they don't. They don't either know or they're
like in the mindset to ask you about everything that's
(04:04):
actually on the table. And it was up to me
to figure those things out and to be accountable for
my own health. And so that led me on a
very long, very deep journey that started with dietaria changes,
started with all the bio hacks. That's like one of
the things that I help women get out of is
you know, filling their life with a full time job
and trying to stay healthy. It's like, no, it's not
(04:25):
that hard. But what a lot of women are missing
is the emotional component understanding how their experiences are being
reflected in their body and how their body is communicating
with them and saying, hey, we need to start here
with this type of experience. So in my case, I
use something called German new medicine. Now I didn't know
(04:46):
it back then, but through that I was able to
resolve those digestive issues by making the connection that those
had started in response to an argument I had had
with my now ex husband, where I just it was
such a surprise, like we had you know, we came
to realize we were in two different places, and I
was like so angry, and at the time I couldn't
(05:07):
say anything, and we stayed together. We ended up getting married,
bying a house, having a family. But there just was
enough of a trigger there that it kept me kind
of in the conflict. So I would sometimes have symptoms,
sometimes not have symptoms, And when I was kind of
going the route of trying to figure out like is
it a food is it a nutrient I'm missing? Is
(05:28):
it something else? I never once thought about that argument,
you know, it was, Yeah, it was a pretty pivotal
part of our relationship. But but that I was doing
all of this, like I said, biohacking and trying to
like left brain and figure it out. When when I
finally got connected with somebody who knew German new medicine
and is like, when did you have an experience like this?
(05:50):
And it was plain as day. I was like, oh
there was that? Are you that huge argument? And I'm like,
that's probably what it was, and have been to like
reintroduce gluten into my life and like I eat everything
now and it's amazing.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Okay, so wow, so you are so everything. My show is,
so this is what happened to you basically through your
marriage and getting divorced, and this is how you got
on this path really for natural health and to be
a natural path, right. I mean, it's amazing. So if
you had not had your marriage and not had your divorce,
maybe this would not be where you are today.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Oh I never would take away my marriage and my divorce.
I'm actually one of the blessed ones that has a
good relationship with my ex. He's not. You know, people
would ask is is he still this in this because
they make assumptions about what he is, but he is not.
Things did not work out with us, but we have
two beautiful children together. Just last night we were at
one of my son's flag football games. We sat on
(06:48):
the same blanket together. You know, I work with a
lot of women who have such a different experience where
it's like their exes out to get them and their
behavior seems like, oh, they're just trying to ruin your life.
And I help women learn to manage that, learn to
kind of get themselves right, help them understand that. And
(07:09):
some I'm just gonna invite you to take a deep
breath when I say this, your listeners to take a
deep breath. Is that we create our patterns, like the
patterns that are coming in. If you have like repeated
people abandoning you, or repeated people crossing your boundaries, or
repeated people doing X, y Z lying to you, whatever,
you were the common denominator in that, and there is
(07:30):
something that you are resonating with that leads you to
not put up that boundary or not like filter out
that person. So if you married a narcissist. There were
other women that went on a date with him before
you that were like, i'll pass, but you had you
had he I actually call him healing code. So it's
(07:51):
not like a blame comment to say you're the common denominator.
It's like he was bringing in something that you really
needed to look at, and you know, maybe amplified ten times.
But when you start to look at it, you start
to see, oh, oh, here's where here's where I could adjust,
Here's where I'm still holding a pattern that's related to
(08:14):
anger or fear or distrust or or usually just some
kind of something that happened in childhood wounding. And it's
an opportunity to work on yourself to heal. Like you
can't change what he's going to do, and it's not
okay if he's abusing you, of course, but there is
work within yourself that can be done, and when you
do that, it just changes everything I had. I had
(08:36):
one client who's like I had. She had to go
to a graduation, her daughter's college graduation. It was the
first time she had to be in like the same
place as her ex and and she just she's like,
you know, I used to get so upset, and like
when he would do things or you know, his typical stuff,
I would just be like huh, like no, try just
like oh that's curious, that's interesting. And rather than residant
(09:00):
with like, oh he's doing this to me, she was
just like, huh, that's fascinating that he did that.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
So it's all a change of mindset, right, and it
changes everything inside your body.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
It changes everything inside your body. It changed things for
her daughter and the other daughters that were there. It
changed things for him where she could see him doing
things that are just like a little bit a little
different because she was responding totally differently, even just on
an energetic level, she was responding differently. And our nervous
(09:32):
systems do talk to each other. So sometimes even when
you're not saying something, we can feel like even underneath,
like this level of stress or this reaction, or this
something we're always looking for, like micro expressions we don't
even really realize you're doing. It's how you kind of
read the room, you know, and we're all pretty good
(09:55):
at that. It's what keeps us safe. But when you
start to change those kinds of things within yourself, your
micro expressions change, or energy changes and that changes the
whole dynamic. That's amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
It's when when you the way you say, it's like,
oh that makes so much sense now, all right, So
where do we start, as as Will's focus on the women,
where do we start and how do we know what's
right for our bodies and what we need to have
and take this path?
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Well, we start with the symptoms you know I have,
And I say chronic symptoms. I don't mean that you
have to be diagnosed by somebody with a stethoscope around
their neck. I mean like day in day out, you're
struggling with anxiety, or you're struggling with ruminating, you're struggling
with just can't get over it because because like healing
(10:44):
divorced trauma isn't just about it isn't about moving it on.
It's about releasing with the body hasn't had a chance
to resolve yet. So using German new medicine, it's also
the name called Germanic Health Knowledge, I use the old
name just because it's easier to roll off the toumbe
for me. It was created by a man who actually
(11:04):
was finding these patterns that the body makes purposeful adaptations
when it comes into a conflict, and those follow a pattern.
He actually was using brain scans to show that the
brain even responds. The brain creates like a mark on
it and on the area that's being affected. So I
(11:27):
mentioned the digestive issues. That's how he was able to
kind of decode what a digestive issue means. And when
women tell me they have weight game, I say, okay,
so let's if you want to work on that. Let's
look at where you might have feelings of abandonment. Where
do you feel like you don't belong or are you
struggling to feel like you're safe You're going to survive?
(11:50):
And these can be literal, these can also be metaphorical.
So at hospital stay can make you wonder like am
I going to survive and cause you to swell and
gain weight, but also not being not sure you're going
to make your bill payments every month. It's also like
we don't necessarily die from that, but it is such
an important part of our life that metaphorically it becomes
(12:14):
kind of a survival piece. Okay, So you know, two
women can have been through very similar situations, but they
both come to it with different perspectives and different ways
of looking at the world and looking at their experience,
so their symptoms can be totally different. So that's why
we use that to get to the heart of well,
(12:36):
what are you carrying and what is your body asking
you to resolve?
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Amazing, I'm so fascinated by all this. I have to
take a deep breath just to just take this all
in because it's not something that I'm familiar with her
that I know. Tell us about your signature method for
helping women, the Vibrant Way and the Court, the Vibrant
Way and the course.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, my course. The Vibrant Way was really inspired by
an experience I had where I met a woman that
I hadn't seen in a while. She had been a
neighbor lived in the neighborhood when I was married, and
so I didn't see her for she had moved out
of the neighborhood. I didn't see her during the divorce
till a few years afterwards. And as she and I
(13:18):
we ran into each other. As she and I were talking,
she literally stopped me. She like put her hand on
my arm or something like that, and she's like, I'm sorry,
I have to ask you because I just can't stop.
She's like you're just glowing? Are you in love? Like?
And at the time, I was not dating anybody. I
wasn't even on dating apps, like, I was nowhere near
being in love with anybody else. So the first thing
(13:41):
that came out of my mouth was well, just with myself.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
And I was like and she's like, wait, what.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yes, But I was like, oh my gosh, I don't
think I've ever said anything more true of my life.
And it was that moment that I was like, oh
my gosh. So I started sharing this story with it
like I'm like, you know, friends and some of my
friends are divorced, and they were like, I want to
know how to be that. I want to know that.
What did you do to get there? And so I
started thinking back, like, well what did I do? Because
(14:10):
I actually went through two rounds of adrenal fatigue, once
when I was married, once when I just had gotten
out of my marriage. And the first round I tried
to do all the biohacks and the supplements and that's
when I was trying to figure out I don't have
a food and sensitivity blah blah blah blah. And then
later on the second time, I was like, well that
didn't work, So let me do the opposite. And so
(14:33):
I kind of created a different method. And it was
so centered, it was so centered on listening to what
my body was saying that I had gotten away from that,
and I think I see a lot of women have
done that too. That through the trauma of the divorce
and sometimes the trauma of the marriage, and sometimes the
trauma of what happened in childhood, they became separated from
(14:57):
their internal guidance or to be internally connected caused conflict,
and so they kind of have learned to not trust that.
So we bring them back, we kind of create some
more resilience. There's something called the reticular activating system, which
will kind of subconsciously mark things that are important. So,
(15:24):
like we've all had this. If you've bought a new
car and you're like, I don't know anybody who has
this car, and then you're driving to work and you
see five of them and you're driving, you know, you're
driving down the highway at seventy miles an hour and
you're like, in that parking lot, three spaces in four rows,
and is my car? You know, it's like you're hardwired
to notice this car. All of a sudden and it's
(15:45):
because you kind of are. You have told your system
like this is important, so that reticular activating system is
always active, always active, and always working. And when it
gets centered on something that is as hard or dangerous,
like an argument, then it starts to make connections with
(16:07):
other things. And then we'll start giving you like a
little ping, like a little ding, like like you may
not even fully recognize, like, oh, I was making a
peanut butter sandwich with you know when we had an argument,
and so now peanut butter actually kind of gives me
a little ding. But you don't really make that connection.
You just kind of walking around a little hyper vigilant
(16:28):
and anxious and you don't you don't really know why.
So so in the vibrant way, we help to like
reset those big experiences so that the reticular activating system
can let go, can start seeking safety. We do other
exercise like flipping the script, like building that resilience, like
really really being able to learn to let go of
(16:52):
what other people say so we can be more centered
on what we say from our internal loving place.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Oh my god, it's so, it's so it's so interesting
because I don't know anything about all of this, so
learning this is like a whole new It's a whole
new thing.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
All right.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
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Speaker 2 (18:06):
We're back.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Okay, So we're talking about a traditional natriopath, which you
are flex health and what does flex health mean?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
So flex health with Maura started when I got out
of that biohacking land and it felt so amazing to
just go to a restaurant and be like, I can
order anything on the menu. I don't have to ask.
I don't have to ask did you use gluten in
that soup? I don't have to ask, you know, I
(18:37):
don't have to worry, and I don't have to worry
that when I go home, I'm going to have flares,
I'm going to have, you know, all this stuff. Getting
myself out of that so that I actually had better health,
more energy, doing less and so just enjoying my life
and being able to have the flexibility to, like I said,
eat whatever I want, or to skip a workout for
(18:59):
a day, or just not take my supplement and not
worry about it felt like the ultimate flex you know,
like the yeah, a.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Really good feeling rather than having to worry about everything
that you put into your body or everywhere you go.
So the connection between symptoms, relationship and how our bodies
are trying to help us or tell us, meaning like
if we have a symptom, our body is telling us something.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Yeah, usually the symptoms shows up when you have results.
So we mentioned the conflict active time whenever you had
something happen. I keep using the example of a fight
because it's just so common and like, ideally you have
an argument with somebody, it's just bound to happen, and
then five minutes, ten minutes, hour later something like that,
(19:49):
you make up and your body resolves because it at
the time, depending on your perspective, was like either adding
cells to an area or taking cells away from an
area to prepare for things to be really challenging in
your life, you know. Like I was talking about the
weight gain, the reason why your body holds onto that
(20:10):
water is because it thinks you're going to go into exile.
It thinks that at some point food and water are
going to be scarce, and you can live without food
longer than you can live without water. So your body's like, oh,
we're going to hold onto this water so that we
can just have have it in reserves or when we're
out in the desert. That's not literally what's going to
(20:30):
happen to pretty much any of us. But yeah, it's
the mechanism from that, and all healing happens in a
fluid environment, so that's like a secondary reason why it
kind of hangs onto that fluid. Well, when you make
up and you resolve that conflict and you know you're
not going to be abandoned anymore, you know you're not
going to go into exile anymore, your body's like, okay,
(20:52):
we can release that fluid. And then suddenly you're like,
oh my gosh, why am I having to go to
the bathroom so much? And it's because your body's turning
back what it was doing for your protection. Amazing. It's biological,
bio life logical, logical, life logical, and there's so many
things that in our bodies that make sense whenever we
(21:15):
put it through this lens that doctor Hammer discovered for us,
and it's just yeah, it's a totally it's a very
freeing way to start to look at life because, like
I said, so many things come on board again for you,
the foods and the time that you get back because
you're not like spending all day in the sun and
then cold clunging and then going for that hit workout
(21:37):
and then lifting heavy and then also not, by the way,
do we have to do all that now?
Speaker 1 (21:44):
Like people are like so like, I mean, I give myself,
Like I never used to work out, and then COVID happened.
Then I started walking a lot, and luckily I was thinned.
So I and I guess I just wasn't you know.
I played tennis, I went horsepey grind. But is it
like a workout. But I have a puppy. So I
walk every day, sometimes twice a day, sometimes three times
(22:06):
a day. But there are days where I'm like, now,
I give myself permission. If I just don't feel like it,
I just don't And that's.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Okay, I guess right absolutely. During the healing phase your body,
literally that's a lot of times when we show symptoms.
That's when we can have fevers, we can have all
kinds of things that your body is doing to bring
on the bacteria that rebuilds or takes away those extra cells,
and with that will come exhaustion. You're in bed, you're tired.
(22:37):
It's great to listen to that because your body needs
that time to rebuild and to readjust And that was
like one of the first things that I gave myself
to get out of adrenal fatigue was if I'm tired,
I'm gonna lay down. I'm going to take out rest,
even if it's five minutes, ten minutes. And believe me,
ten minute rest at the time was so hard because
I had my nervous systems so worked up that I
(23:00):
would lay down on my bed and within thirty seconds,
I'd be like, oh I should do this. Oh wait,
I'll rest better if I did it. Oh wait. And
I had to train myself to just be okay with
resting and just be okay with letting myself take the
time to relax. Like if we all needed to cold
plunge or to eat a sie berries, we'd be dead
(23:24):
because like we haven't been doing that, but we have
still somehow managed to survive. Now, I think the best
most healing thing that you can do for yourself is
something you love. So if you find a movement that
you love. I love Latin dancing. I have discovered that
when I go Latin dancing, the dancing doesn't even start
till ten o'clock. Now, my normal right routine is I'm
(23:47):
in bed by like nine thirty ten. You know, I'm
honoring my body's rhythms. But on my Latin dancing nights,
I'm dancing not only not resting, but up dancing in
loud music for like an hour or two at that
time when I normally should be going to sleep, and
I'll wake up in the morning just like on this
(24:08):
very natural high. Like I'm just like feel so good
from that that it lasts me through. And I'm just
I can tell in my mood, I can tell in
my body when I haven't danced enough. So these basic
foundations of moving your body and eating enough. Like so
a lot of women have to let go of their
(24:29):
pet diets that they know, quote unquote no, are the
best for them. But really, whenever we sit back and
we like count the calories, they're not giving themselves enough energy.
So from right there, they're trying to supplement their way
out of a deficit that is just so simple to
take care of. Like you may need to actually add
(24:49):
bread back in, and yes, we can work on the
triggers that make that work for you, but you have
to expand that palette. And and I always make the
point to women like if you went on or uh
took some food out of your diet like gluten, say,
usually starts with gluten, and then you had another trigger.
(25:10):
Then you find out, oh another food is bothering you.
Oh another food is bothering you. Another food is bothering you.
Well that's a sign right there that that restrictive diet
is not healing you, not getting better. You're just taking
away more foods. And why is it? Because it wasn't
actually about the food. It was probably about something else.
I always give the it's about like an experience.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
That you had, because this is like so I love
everything about this, by the way, thank you.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Thank you. I mean it's really really powerful, like if
you can wrap your mind around it and like let
go of anything that's been I'm not saying that like
information doesn't come from outside, you know, like you can
come across some of that, but there's a lot of
sholds around that, and there's a lot of people promoting
their favorite solution there. Their parasite cleans, their mold cleans
(26:03):
are there, and not saying that those aren't helpful, but
they have a lot of overlap with their symptoms. So
you can go from a parasite cleanse to a heavy
metal detox, to a mold cleanse to a whatever mass
sell whatever is the hot topic for the day, like
on rotation and spend a lot of money, work really
(26:24):
hard and still not feel that much better. And it's
because you may have those things in your system. They
may come up on a test. Although I have a
lot of questions about the testings that we use. But
is it is it really stressing your body? That's the question.
Like people sometimes don't want to look at their actual
(26:46):
root emotional causes.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
Right right, So and in every day like if you
someone came to see you and they're overall okay, what
would you What is the natural way for them? Natural
path way? What should they take? Like on an everyday
basis in general, are there things we should take?
Speaker 2 (27:06):
I think it depends. Like I teach people to muscle
test so that they can see what is good for
their body. And a lot of people come to me
with a closet full of supplements and like, what do
I need? This is too many pills a day. I'm like, okay, yeah,
the stress of taking that many pills is itself not great.
(27:29):
But also our bodies change throughout a week. You might
have one set of needs one week, a different set
of needs another week. So I teach them something called
muscle response testing, which is very simple and you can ask.
It's a way of your body telling you like, yes,
this is what I need this week. No, I don't
need that this week. And I find you can use
(27:50):
that with herbs, you can use that with central oils,
you can use that with all kinds of things once
you get practiced with it. But they find that they
taking life us and they're feeling better because they're responding
to their body's actual changing needs. They have less stress.
And honestly, sometimes I tell people like, I don't care
if you ever take another supplement, as long as you
(28:13):
get if you're not getting your calories, if you're not
getting your water. And I had a client comm who
had the closet full of supplements, was getting to do,
ready to do one hundreds of hundreds of dollars of
diagnostic testing, and turns out she wasn't even drinking thirty
ounces of water in a day.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Oh my god, that's my downfall too. I'm let me
take a sip of water while we're talking.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
Take that sip, girl, I don't get enough water.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
And I can tell because I'm very sluggish, and I
go I need I know, I need to drink that water.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Yeah, and sometimes you know, bringing it back to the divorce,
sometimes we get in that mode where we're so we're
so missing the obvious things because we're not honoring and
like devoted to ourselves. And so I help people go
away from thinking of things as a discipline, although I
don't really have a problem with discipline, like generically, generally
(29:08):
people think of discipline as like a hard strict thing.
But to discipline yourself is to like show by the
way by leading the way, by to teach by leading
by showing. But I like to change it, especially for women,
to a devotion like be devoted to yourself, to be
devoted and committed to drinking that water because you know
(29:28):
your body needs it. And same for eating the foods
and listening to the little cues. Today I really want
a baked potato. Oh my gosh, tomorrow I might want
a burger. There might actually be something in that burger
that my body needs. And rather than shaming it and
putting foods in the good bad category, like learning to
(29:49):
listen to your body and trust in it. It's it's
kept you alive. This song, you know, I go back.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
To the fact always I say, you know, because nowadays
there's so much stuff and there's so this is good
for you, this is bad for you. The Bobby, the Bobby,
does Bobby approve it or whatever that they Oh, right,
Bobby us with the Bobby, And so I go, Well,
my grandmother she lived if she was ninety one years old,
and let me tell you, she made chicken nukeies. I
(30:16):
didn't no one probably knows what that is, but it
was like full of probably everything. No one ever got
her recipe, by the way, but she would have the
candies and she would eat whatever, and she would eat
food that was a the refrigerator for days and days
and like God knows, she ate everything. And yes, and
she was healthy and strong as an ox. So so
(30:37):
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Right? I mean, there are some things that have changed,
like we have not always been inundated by Wi fi.
But we also just need to remember to take back
our power. And you know, that's a big part of
the Vibrant Way, like helping women to remember to stand
in their power. When you have somebody who's put their
life mission on ruining your life, or it seems that way.
(31:00):
Mm hmmm, he does own your life. You own your life.
You own your life, You create your life. You have
so much power within that. And when you succumb to like,
oh he's doing another thing again, then you're not focused
on living your life. So we want you to be.
(31:20):
That's why I connect with joy, Like what is living?
What do you even like to do? Do you even
remember what you like to do anymore? You know? Like
and sometimes when they're like, oh, you know what, I
used to really love playing darts.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Okay, that's something you can look good. I would do
that right. Oh it's amazing. I feel like at this
stage of my life, I am living joy and living
my best life. And it's amazing because I find also
who I surround myself with now hm hmmm makes a
difference too, Yes, I mean a huge difference. Like I
have this Triple Joy group that we just like we
(31:57):
just girl talk and do fun things and and like
don't take life too seriously. And it's brought so much
more peace and happiness into my life. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
Yes, absolutely, Like, so I tell people, you know, watch
out for your your Facebook groups that you're in, like
check the vibe on those. I have some divorce Facebook
groups in and I really I cringe to like go
and tap in whenever I have to, because it's it's
a for all intents and purposes, it's a man hating group.
(32:29):
Like and it's okay to be angry. We all have
we all have angry, we all have anger and hurt.
But if you are clinging to that, then you will
pull more in, but you will also kind of shade
shade your experience so that you then definitely can't tell
the difference between a good guy and a bad guy.
(32:50):
Back the red flags, because you think everything's a red flag,
and it hinders your ability to move on and to
meet somebody else, so might actually be really great. And
and it's kind of similar with some of the health groups,
Like I had to get out of some of those
because I would get on them and I would learn
(33:12):
quote unquote learn all this stuff, and then I would
just stress for the rest of the night about like
am I going to do this new biohack and work
that in. It's like, oh no, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
So you got you got on this natural health because
doctors didn't have answers for your digestive issues, and then
the digestive issues were somehow tied in also to your
your relationship, your divorce and all that other stuff too.
And you knew that you went on this healing journey
and now you're helping other people with your the Vibrant way,
(33:45):
your traditional naturopath, the flex health with with Maura Laura today.
How are you today and how is your life today?
And how did you get to the other side?
Speaker 2 (33:56):
My life is like in it's the kind of life
that I'm like, I will I take all of the
hurt into stride like it has a totally different view.
I have a totally different view on that. I mean,
it was painful. Even though my divorce was pretty amicable,
pretty peaceful. Like I said, he and I have a
(34:19):
good relationship, it was still really painful. It was still
really hard to make that call and make that decision,
and it came after years of struggle within our marriage.
But I look at what I'm doing now. I never
would have been able to be a natural path if
I was still married to him. I never would be
dancing if I was still married to him, And not
(34:39):
because he said don't do those things, but because of
the way I was being and showing up in that marriage,
and it just required something of me that was taking
a lot from me. So now I have totally different friends.
I have my own life. I love what you call
the Triple Joy group I have, I have. I actually
(35:02):
have another friend. I pulled in another friend who's a
natural path. He does frequency medicine too and dances relationship.
Oh she's she's a friend girl.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Like if you is there is there a new person
in your life?
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Oh no, not at this moment, but you know, people
come in come out like that has changed a lot too.
Like I was just dating has become so much more
simple since I started living in the Vibrant Way, started
living in Joy, started living in you know, we learned
some really basic communication communication things. By the way, the
Vibrant Way opens and closes, like about seasonally every couple months,
(35:40):
it'll open and close because it's an eight week program.
But if your listeners look at the Vibrantway dot com
and it's not open, they can join my email list
and grab the Divorce Detax, which will take them through
the first the very first thing we do in the
Vibrant Way, as well as give them two videos on
changing the energy between yourself and your ex and some
(36:03):
my thirteen most basic tips on dating with self love,
so you don't waste time on the wrong guys. And
so that's one of the things that like it's been
my own growth journey and to like learn when to
just peacefully be like, uh, yeah, this isn't for me. Yeah,
And you choose you.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
You choose you.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Exactly and very easily and without having to explain, like
go through the drama of explaining and telling them and teaching.
Speaker 1 (36:29):
And there's so much at one of my friends, she's
always like when we leave each other, every single time
we leave each other, peace, love, joy, happiness, triple joy.
Like that's what she says to us every time she leaves.
I love it. And yeah, it's the way when you
look at life like that, it's everything changes within you.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
And when you speak it like that, like speaking what
you speak, Like if if your listeners take anything away,
what pay attention to what you're saying about yourself, about men,
about marriage, about your life. You were speaking that into
your energetic feel I do frequency therapy as well, and
I have to help people understand like you are your
(37:10):
own bioresonance device, and the words that you say, the
things that you speak are what color you to you
know color, It's like putting on not rose colored glasses,
but something else colored classes where you're like looking for
the evidence that life is hard, that divorce sucks, or
you know, like all of everything going to be right,
(37:30):
but when you're saying, hey, peace, love and happiness, okay,
let me look.
Speaker 1 (37:34):
For that right right, amazing. I love your journey, and
I love that your journey brought you to doing what
you're doing. I'm going to have you back absolutely again.
I'm going to talk to you off the record, off
this podcast about something else, and then we can bring
it back to this podcast. What this was like so
(37:54):
eye opening and I love everything about it. I can't
thank you enough.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Thank you for having me on.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Oh thank you. Well, you'll be back. Needlekuda Divorce and
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(38:20):
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to five zero zero
Hi, I'm Wendy, and this is Divorce Doesn't Suck. I'm
talking all about the life you can live after divorce.
You'll hear regular people's stories about their divorces and how
they reinvented themselves and grew. You'll also get invaluable advice
from experts who serve in the divorce community. A little
about me. I'm a former TV producer and mom of two.
I got divorced in two thousand and eight when there
were really no outlets or platforms for me to turn to.
(00:22):
So I'm paying it forward and have created a platform
to help men and women learn that there absolutely is
a fresh, new and exciting life after divorce. Come with
me on this journey and paint your brand new blank
canvas of happily ever after divorce. This episode is brought
to in part by the Needle Kuda Law Firm guidance
that Moves lives forward. Welcome to another episode of Divorce
(00:43):
Doesn't Suck. I'm your host, Wendy Sloan and my guests
today named the Vibrant Way. She is a traditional natriopath
who developed her signature method for helping women heal from
divorce trauma so they can they can go into a
place where they can share their story without crying. I
love that and I've never heard that. I never heard
(01:04):
it like that before. Welcome to my show, Maura, Eliza.
Speaker 2 (01:07):
Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Thank you so much for being here. And right off
the bat, tell us, what is a traditional natriopath?
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Oh, so, a naturopath is a person who helps somebody
with their health educate through education. The mds that you
see those are called allopaths. They use allopathic medicine, and
naturopath uses natural medicine, so they would know about how
to keep the body healthy as opposed to just responding
when you're sick. And there's really two different kinds of
(01:40):
natural paths. There's naturopathic doctors and they can do more
diagnosing and prescribing, but a traditional naturopath is more folks
centered on education and helping you understand holistically what keeps
you healthy body, mind, and spirit. That's and so we're
kind of more along the lines of traditional traditional health
(02:04):
health strategies that have been used for hundreds, if not
thousands of years.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
Okay, this is like right up, my alliance, something I
love so much because I always say, like we got
to get to the root of the problem. Like you
go to a doctor and you have a call, they
give you this, and they just like treat the symptoms,
but they don't get to the root of it, right, Yeah,
So I feel like that's what you do. You get
to the root of it.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, and well, there's a lot of natural providers that
kind of use an allopathic model where they are you know,
maybe they're trying to lower your cholesterol and they're going
to do it with a supplement or an herb or
something like that in or maybe even dietaria changes rather
than getting to the root of understanding that cholesterol is
(02:46):
actually a protective mechanism for the body. It's like the
healing band aid. And so we got to understand like
what is causing the body to think that it needs
to elevate the cholesterol. It's also essential in creating your
hormones sonderstanding that cholesterol is good. It's the raw materials
for a lot of functions in your body, and like
(03:06):
what is going on with it being kind of out
of the normal range. That's what we would be looking at.
So interesting.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
Okay, so let's back up just a little bit. How
did you get started in natural health.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
I got started in natural health when I was having
digestive issues and I went to see an allopathic doctor,
your regular doctor that's on your insurance, and they're like,
we don't know what's going on. They offered to stick
a camera up my booty. I was like, no, thank you,
and that was the best that they had to offer me.
And I had already on my own noticed that some
dietary changes were it would help it. But when I
(03:40):
went home and actually started looking in all, you know,
I actually started in some Facebook groups. I learned about charlotics,
I learned about digestive enzymes. I learned about all kinds
of things, and I was like, why you might have
to tell me about any of this stuff? Like they
didn't even ask. So I got it started on, you know,
realize that they don't. They don't either know or they're
like in the mindset to ask you about everything that's
(04:04):
actually on the table. And it was up to me
to figure those things out and to be accountable for
my own health. And so that led me on a
very long, very deep journey that started with dietaria changes,
started with all the bio hacks. That's like one of
the things that I help women get out of is
you know, filling their life with a full time job
and trying to stay healthy. It's like, no, it's not
(04:25):
that hard. But what a lot of women are missing
is the emotional component understanding how their experiences are being
reflected in their body and how their body is communicating
with them and saying, hey, we need to start here
with this type of experience. So in my case, I
use something called German new medicine. Now I didn't know
(04:46):
it back then, but through that I was able to
resolve those digestive issues by making the connection that those
had started in response to an argument I had had
with my now ex husband, where I just it was
such a surprise, like we had you know, we came
to realize we were in two different places, and I
was like so angry, and at the time I couldn't
(05:07):
say anything, and we stayed together. We ended up getting married,
bying a house, having a family. But there just was
enough of a trigger there that it kept me kind
of in the conflict. So I would sometimes have symptoms,
sometimes not have symptoms, And when I was kind of
going the route of trying to figure out like is
it a food is it a nutrient I'm missing? Is
(05:28):
it something else? I never once thought about that argument,
you know, it was, Yeah, it was a pretty pivotal
part of our relationship. But but that I was doing
all of this, like I said, biohacking and trying to
like left brain and figure it out. When when I
finally got connected with somebody who knew German new medicine
and is like, when did you have an experience like this?
(05:50):
And it was plain as day. I was like, oh
there was that? Are you that huge argument? And I'm like,
that's probably what it was, and have been to like
reintroduce gluten into my life and like I eat everything
now and it's amazing.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Okay, so wow, so you are so everything. My show is,
so this is what happened to you basically through your
marriage and getting divorced, and this is how you got
on this path really for natural health and to be
a natural path, right. I mean, it's amazing. So if
you had not had your marriage and not had your divorce,
maybe this would not be where you are today.
Speaker 2 (06:27):
Oh I never would take away my marriage and my divorce.
I'm actually one of the blessed ones that has a
good relationship with my ex. He's not. You know, people
would ask is is he still this in this because
they make assumptions about what he is, but he is not.
Things did not work out with us, but we have
two beautiful children together. Just last night we were at
one of my son's flag football games. We sat on
(06:48):
the same blanket together. You know, I work with a
lot of women who have such a different experience where
it's like their exes out to get them and their
behavior seems like, oh, they're just trying to ruin your life.
And I help women learn to manage that, learn to
kind of get themselves right, help them understand that. And
(07:09):
some I'm just gonna invite you to take a deep
breath when I say this, your listeners to take a
deep breath. Is that we create our patterns, like the
patterns that are coming in. If you have like repeated
people abandoning you, or repeated people crossing your boundaries, or
repeated people doing X, y Z lying to you, whatever,
you were the common denominator in that, and there is
(07:30):
something that you are resonating with that leads you to
not put up that boundary or not like filter out
that person. So if you married a narcissist. There were
other women that went on a date with him before
you that were like, i'll pass, but you had you
had he I actually call him healing code. So it's
(07:51):
not like a blame comment to say you're the common denominator.
It's like he was bringing in something that you really
needed to look at, and you know, maybe amplified ten times.
But when you start to look at it, you start
to see, oh, oh, here's where here's where I could adjust,
Here's where I'm still holding a pattern that's related to
(08:14):
anger or fear or distrust or or usually just some
kind of something that happened in childhood wounding. And it's
an opportunity to work on yourself to heal. Like you
can't change what he's going to do, and it's not
okay if he's abusing you, of course, but there is
work within yourself that can be done, and when you
do that, it just changes everything I had. I had
(08:36):
one client who's like I had. She had to go
to a graduation, her daughter's college graduation. It was the
first time she had to be in like the same
place as her ex and and she just she's like,
you know, I used to get so upset, and like
when he would do things or you know, his typical stuff,
I would just be like huh, like no, try just
like oh that's curious, that's interesting. And rather than residant
(09:00):
with like, oh he's doing this to me, she was
just like, huh, that's fascinating that he did that.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
So it's all a change of mindset, right, and it
changes everything inside your body.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
It changes everything inside your body. It changed things for
her daughter and the other daughters that were there. It
changed things for him where she could see him doing
things that are just like a little bit a little
different because she was responding totally differently, even just on
an energetic level, she was responding differently. And our nervous
(09:32):
systems do talk to each other. So sometimes even when
you're not saying something, we can feel like even underneath,
like this level of stress or this reaction, or this
something we're always looking for, like micro expressions we don't
even really realize you're doing. It's how you kind of
read the room, you know, and we're all pretty good
(09:55):
at that. It's what keeps us safe. But when you
start to change those kinds of things within yourself, your
micro expressions change, or energy changes and that changes the
whole dynamic. That's amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
It's when when you the way you say, it's like,
oh that makes so much sense now, all right, So
where do we start, as as Will's focus on the women,
where do we start and how do we know what's
right for our bodies and what we need to have
and take this path?
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Well, we start with the symptoms you know I have,
And I say chronic symptoms. I don't mean that you
have to be diagnosed by somebody with a stethoscope around
their neck. I mean like day in day out, you're
struggling with anxiety, or you're struggling with ruminating, you're struggling
with just can't get over it because because like healing
(10:44):
divorced trauma isn't just about it isn't about moving it on.
It's about releasing with the body hasn't had a chance
to resolve yet. So using German new medicine, it's also
the name called Germanic Health Knowledge, I use the old
name just because it's easier to roll off the toumbe
for me. It was created by a man who actually
(11:04):
was finding these patterns that the body makes purposeful adaptations
when it comes into a conflict, and those follow a pattern.
He actually was using brain scans to show that the
brain even responds. The brain creates like a mark on
it and on the area that's being affected. So I
(11:27):
mentioned the digestive issues. That's how he was able to
kind of decode what a digestive issue means. And when
women tell me they have weight game, I say, okay,
so let's if you want to work on that. Let's
look at where you might have feelings of abandonment. Where
do you feel like you don't belong or are you
struggling to feel like you're safe You're going to survive?
(11:50):
And these can be literal, these can also be metaphorical.
So at hospital stay can make you wonder like am
I going to survive and cause you to swell and
gain weight, but also not being not sure you're going
to make your bill payments every month. It's also like
we don't necessarily die from that, but it is such
an important part of our life that metaphorically it becomes
(12:14):
kind of a survival piece. Okay, So you know, two
women can have been through very similar situations, but they
both come to it with different perspectives and different ways
of looking at the world and looking at their experience,
so their symptoms can be totally different. So that's why
we use that to get to the heart of well,
(12:36):
what are you carrying and what is your body asking
you to resolve?
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Amazing, I'm so fascinated by all this. I have to
take a deep breath just to just take this all
in because it's not something that I'm familiar with her
that I know. Tell us about your signature method for
helping women, the Vibrant Way and the Court, the Vibrant
Way and the course.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, my course. The Vibrant Way was really inspired by
an experience I had where I met a woman that
I hadn't seen in a while. She had been a
neighbor lived in the neighborhood when I was married, and
so I didn't see her for she had moved out
of the neighborhood. I didn't see her during the divorce
till a few years afterwards. And as she and I
(13:18):
we ran into each other. As she and I were talking,
she literally stopped me. She like put her hand on
my arm or something like that, and she's like, I'm sorry,
I have to ask you because I just can't stop.
She's like you're just glowing? Are you in love? Like?
And at the time, I was not dating anybody. I
wasn't even on dating apps, like, I was nowhere near
being in love with anybody else. So the first thing
(13:41):
that came out of my mouth was well, just with myself.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
And I was like and she's like, wait, what.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Yes, But I was like, oh my gosh, I don't
think I've ever said anything more true of my life.
And it was that moment that I was like, oh
my gosh. So I started sharing this story with it
like I'm like, you know, friends and some of my
friends are divorced, and they were like, I want to
know how to be that. I want to know that.
What did you do to get there? And so I
started thinking back, like, well what did I do? Because
(14:10):
I actually went through two rounds of adrenal fatigue, once
when I was married, once when I just had gotten
out of my marriage. And the first round I tried
to do all the biohacks and the supplements and that's
when I was trying to figure out I don't have
a food and sensitivity blah blah blah blah. And then
later on the second time, I was like, well that
didn't work, So let me do the opposite. And so
(14:33):
I kind of created a different method. And it was
so centered, it was so centered on listening to what
my body was saying that I had gotten away from that,
and I think I see a lot of women have
done that too. That through the trauma of the divorce
and sometimes the trauma of the marriage, and sometimes the
trauma of what happened in childhood, they became separated from
(14:57):
their internal guidance or to be internally connected caused conflict,
and so they kind of have learned to not trust that.
So we bring them back, we kind of create some
more resilience. There's something called the reticular activating system, which
will kind of subconsciously mark things that are important. So,
(15:24):
like we've all had this. If you've bought a new
car and you're like, I don't know anybody who has
this car, and then you're driving to work and you
see five of them and you're driving, you know, you're
driving down the highway at seventy miles an hour and
you're like, in that parking lot, three spaces in four rows,
and is my car? You know, it's like you're hardwired
to notice this car. All of a sudden and it's
(15:45):
because you kind of are. You have told your system
like this is important, so that reticular activating system is
always active, always active, and always working. And when it
gets centered on something that is as hard or dangerous,
like an argument, then it starts to make connections with
(16:07):
other things. And then we'll start giving you like a
little ping, like a little ding, like like you may
not even fully recognize, like, oh, I was making a
peanut butter sandwich with you know when we had an argument,
and so now peanut butter actually kind of gives me
a little ding. But you don't really make that connection.
You just kind of walking around a little hyper vigilant
(16:28):
and anxious and you don't you don't really know why.
So so in the vibrant way, we help to like
reset those big experiences so that the reticular activating system
can let go, can start seeking safety. We do other
exercise like flipping the script, like building that resilience, like
really really being able to learn to let go of
(16:52):
what other people say so we can be more centered
on what we say from our internal loving place.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Oh my god, it's so, it's so it's so interesting
because I don't know anything about all of this, so
learning this is like a whole new It's a whole
new thing.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
All right.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
We're going to take a quick break for one of
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Speaker 2 (18:06):
We're back.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Okay, So we're talking about a traditional natriopath, which you
are flex health and what does flex health mean?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
So flex health with Maura started when I got out
of that biohacking land and it felt so amazing to
just go to a restaurant and be like, I can
order anything on the menu. I don't have to ask.
I don't have to ask did you use gluten in
that soup? I don't have to ask, you know, I
(18:37):
don't have to worry, and I don't have to worry
that when I go home, I'm going to have flares,
I'm going to have, you know, all this stuff. Getting
myself out of that so that I actually had better health,
more energy, doing less and so just enjoying my life
and being able to have the flexibility to, like I said,
eat whatever I want, or to skip a workout for
(18:59):
a day, or just not take my supplement and not
worry about it felt like the ultimate flex you know,
like the yeah, a.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
Really good feeling rather than having to worry about everything
that you put into your body or everywhere you go.
So the connection between symptoms, relationship and how our bodies
are trying to help us or tell us, meaning like
if we have a symptom, our body is telling us something.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Yeah, usually the symptoms shows up when you have results.
So we mentioned the conflict active time whenever you had
something happen. I keep using the example of a fight
because it's just so common and like, ideally you have
an argument with somebody, it's just bound to happen, and
then five minutes, ten minutes, hour later something like that,
(19:49):
you make up and your body resolves because it at
the time, depending on your perspective, was like either adding
cells to an area or taking cells away from an
area to prepare for things to be really challenging in
your life, you know. Like I was talking about the
weight gain, the reason why your body holds onto that
(20:10):
water is because it thinks you're going to go into exile.
It thinks that at some point food and water are
going to be scarce, and you can live without food
longer than you can live without water. So your body's like, oh,
we're going to hold onto this water so that we
can just have have it in reserves or when we're
out in the desert. That's not literally what's going to
(20:30):
happen to pretty much any of us. But yeah, it's
the mechanism from that, and all healing happens in a
fluid environment, so that's like a secondary reason why it
kind of hangs onto that fluid. Well, when you make
up and you resolve that conflict and you know you're
not going to be abandoned anymore, you know you're not
going to go into exile anymore, your body's like, okay,
(20:52):
we can release that fluid. And then suddenly you're like,
oh my gosh, why am I having to go to
the bathroom so much? And it's because your body's turning
back what it was doing for your protection. Amazing. It's biological,
bio life logical, logical, life logical, and there's so many
things that in our bodies that make sense whenever we
(21:15):
put it through this lens that doctor Hammer discovered for us,
and it's just yeah, it's a totally it's a very
freeing way to start to look at life because, like
I said, so many things come on board again for you,
the foods and the time that you get back because
you're not like spending all day in the sun and
then cold clunging and then going for that hit workout
(21:37):
and then lifting heavy and then also not, by the way,
do we have to do all that now?
Speaker 1 (21:44):
Like people are like so like, I mean, I give myself,
Like I never used to work out, and then COVID happened.
Then I started walking a lot, and luckily I was thinned.
So I and I guess I just wasn't you know.
I played tennis, I went horsepey grind. But is it
like a workout. But I have a puppy. So I
walk every day, sometimes twice a day, sometimes three times
(22:06):
a day. But there are days where I'm like, now,
I give myself permission. If I just don't feel like it,
I just don't And that's.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Okay, I guess right absolutely. During the healing phase your body,
literally that's a lot of times when we show symptoms.
That's when we can have fevers, we can have all
kinds of things that your body is doing to bring
on the bacteria that rebuilds or takes away those extra cells,
and with that will come exhaustion. You're in bed, you're tired.
(22:37):
It's great to listen to that because your body needs
that time to rebuild and to readjust And that was
like one of the first things that I gave myself
to get out of adrenal fatigue was if I'm tired,
I'm gonna lay down. I'm going to take out rest,
even if it's five minutes, ten minutes. And believe me,
ten minute rest at the time was so hard because
I had my nervous systems so worked up that I
(23:00):
would lay down on my bed and within thirty seconds,
I'd be like, oh I should do this. Oh wait,
I'll rest better if I did it. Oh wait. And
I had to train myself to just be okay with
resting and just be okay with letting myself take the
time to relax. Like if we all needed to cold
plunge or to eat a sie berries, we'd be dead
(23:24):
because like we haven't been doing that, but we have
still somehow managed to survive. Now, I think the best
most healing thing that you can do for yourself is
something you love. So if you find a movement that
you love. I love Latin dancing. I have discovered that
when I go Latin dancing, the dancing doesn't even start
till ten o'clock. Now, my normal right routine is I'm
(23:47):
in bed by like nine thirty ten. You know, I'm
honoring my body's rhythms. But on my Latin dancing nights,
I'm dancing not only not resting, but up dancing in
loud music for like an hour or two at that
time when I normally should be going to sleep, and
I'll wake up in the morning just like on this
(24:08):
very natural high. Like I'm just like feel so good
from that that it lasts me through. And I'm just
I can tell in my mood, I can tell in
my body when I haven't danced enough. So these basic
foundations of moving your body and eating enough. Like so
a lot of women have to let go of their
(24:29):
pet diets that they know, quote unquote no, are the
best for them. But really, whenever we sit back and
we like count the calories, they're not giving themselves enough energy.
So from right there, they're trying to supplement their way
out of a deficit that is just so simple to
take care of. Like you may need to actually add
(24:49):
bread back in, and yes, we can work on the
triggers that make that work for you, but you have
to expand that palette. And and I always make the
point to women like if you went on or uh
took some food out of your diet like gluten, say,
usually starts with gluten, and then you had another trigger.
(25:10):
Then you find out, oh another food is bothering you.
Oh another food is bothering you. Another food is bothering you.
Well that's a sign right there that that restrictive diet
is not healing you, not getting better. You're just taking
away more foods. And why is it? Because it wasn't
actually about the food. It was probably about something else.
I always give the it's about like an experience.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
That you had, because this is like so I love
everything about this, by the way, thank you.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Thank you. I mean it's really really powerful, like if
you can wrap your mind around it and like let
go of anything that's been I'm not saying that like
information doesn't come from outside, you know, like you can
come across some of that, but there's a lot of
sholds around that, and there's a lot of people promoting
their favorite solution there. Their parasite cleans, their mold cleans
(26:03):
are there, and not saying that those aren't helpful, but
they have a lot of overlap with their symptoms. So
you can go from a parasite cleanse to a heavy
metal detox, to a mold cleanse to a whatever mass
sell whatever is the hot topic for the day, like
on rotation and spend a lot of money, work really
(26:24):
hard and still not feel that much better. And it's
because you may have those things in your system. They
may come up on a test. Although I have a
lot of questions about the testings that we use. But
is it is it really stressing your body? That's the question.
Like people sometimes don't want to look at their actual
(26:46):
root emotional causes.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
Right right, So and in every day like if you
someone came to see you and they're overall okay, what
would you What is the natural way for them? Natural
path way? What should they take? Like on an everyday
basis in general, are there things we should take?
Speaker 2 (27:06):
I think it depends. Like I teach people to muscle
test so that they can see what is good for
their body. And a lot of people come to me
with a closet full of supplements and like, what do
I need? This is too many pills a day. I'm like, okay, yeah,
the stress of taking that many pills is itself not great.
(27:29):
But also our bodies change throughout a week. You might
have one set of needs one week, a different set
of needs another week. So I teach them something called
muscle response testing, which is very simple and you can ask.
It's a way of your body telling you like, yes,
this is what I need this week. No, I don't
need that this week. And I find you can use
(27:50):
that with herbs, you can use that with central oils,
you can use that with all kinds of things once
you get practiced with it. But they find that they
taking life us and they're feeling better because they're responding
to their body's actual changing needs. They have less stress.
And honestly, sometimes I tell people like, I don't care
if you ever take another supplement, as long as you
(28:13):
get if you're not getting your calories, if you're not
getting your water. And I had a client comm who
had the closet full of supplements, was getting to do,
ready to do one hundreds of hundreds of dollars of
diagnostic testing, and turns out she wasn't even drinking thirty
ounces of water in a day.
Speaker 1 (28:29):
Oh my god, that's my downfall too. I'm let me
take a sip of water while we're talking.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
Take that sip, girl, I don't get enough water.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
And I can tell because I'm very sluggish, and I
go I need I know, I need to drink that water.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Yeah, and sometimes you know, bringing it back to the divorce,
sometimes we get in that mode where we're so we're
so missing the obvious things because we're not honoring and
like devoted to ourselves. And so I help people go
away from thinking of things as a discipline, although I
don't really have a problem with discipline, like generically, generally
(29:08):
people think of discipline as like a hard strict thing.
But to discipline yourself is to like show by the
way by leading the way, by to teach by leading
by showing. But I like to change it, especially for women,
to a devotion like be devoted to yourself, to be
devoted and committed to drinking that water because you know
(29:28):
your body needs it. And same for eating the foods
and listening to the little cues. Today I really want
a baked potato. Oh my gosh, tomorrow I might want
a burger. There might actually be something in that burger
that my body needs. And rather than shaming it and
putting foods in the good bad category, like learning to
(29:49):
listen to your body and trust in it. It's it's
kept you alive. This song, you know, I go back.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
To the fact always I say, you know, because nowadays
there's so much stuff and there's so this is good
for you, this is bad for you. The Bobby, the Bobby,
does Bobby approve it or whatever that they Oh, right,
Bobby us with the Bobby, And so I go, Well,
my grandmother she lived if she was ninety one years old,
and let me tell you, she made chicken nukeies. I
(30:16):
didn't no one probably knows what that is, but it
was like full of probably everything. No one ever got
her recipe, by the way, but she would have the
candies and she would eat whatever, and she would eat
food that was a the refrigerator for days and days
and like God knows, she ate everything. And yes, and
she was healthy and strong as an ox. So so
(30:37):
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Right? I mean, there are some things that have changed,
like we have not always been inundated by Wi fi.
But we also just need to remember to take back
our power. And you know, that's a big part of
the Vibrant Way, like helping women to remember to stand
in their power. When you have somebody who's put their
life mission on ruining your life, or it seems that way.
(31:00):
Mm hmmm, he does own your life. You own your life.
You own your life, You create your life. You have
so much power within that. And when you succumb to like,
oh he's doing another thing again, then you're not focused
on living your life. So we want you to be.
(31:20):
That's why I connect with joy, Like what is living?
What do you even like to do? Do you even
remember what you like to do anymore? You know? Like
and sometimes when they're like, oh, you know what, I
used to really love playing darts.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Okay, that's something you can look good. I would do
that right. Oh it's amazing. I feel like at this
stage of my life, I am living joy and living
my best life. And it's amazing because I find also
who I surround myself with now hm hmmm makes a
difference too, Yes, I mean a huge difference. Like I
have this Triple Joy group that we just like we
(31:57):
just girl talk and do fun things and and like
don't take life too seriously. And it's brought so much
more peace and happiness into my life. It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (32:09):
Yes, absolutely, Like, so I tell people, you know, watch
out for your your Facebook groups that you're in, like
check the vibe on those. I have some divorce Facebook
groups in and I really I cringe to like go
and tap in whenever I have to, because it's it's
a for all intents and purposes, it's a man hating group.
(32:29):
Like and it's okay to be angry. We all have
we all have angry, we all have anger and hurt.
But if you are clinging to that, then you will
pull more in, but you will also kind of shade
shade your experience so that you then definitely can't tell
the difference between a good guy and a bad guy.
(32:50):
Back the red flags, because you think everything's a red flag,
and it hinders your ability to move on and to
meet somebody else, so might actually be really great. And
and it's kind of similar with some of the health groups,
Like I had to get out of some of those
because I would get on them and I would learn
(33:12):
quote unquote learn all this stuff, and then I would
just stress for the rest of the night about like
am I going to do this new biohack and work
that in. It's like, oh no, I'm not.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
So you got you got on this natural health because
doctors didn't have answers for your digestive issues, and then
the digestive issues were somehow tied in also to your
your relationship, your divorce and all that other stuff too.
And you knew that you went on this healing journey
and now you're helping other people with your the Vibrant way,
(33:45):
your traditional naturopath, the flex health with with Maura Laura today.
How are you today and how is your life today?
And how did you get to the other side?
Speaker 2 (33:56):
My life is like in it's the kind of life
that I'm like, I will I take all of the
hurt into stride like it has a totally different view.
I have a totally different view on that. I mean,
it was painful. Even though my divorce was pretty amicable,
pretty peaceful. Like I said, he and I have a
(34:19):
good relationship, it was still really painful. It was still
really hard to make that call and make that decision,
and it came after years of struggle within our marriage.
But I look at what I'm doing now. I never
would have been able to be a natural path if
I was still married to him. I never would be
dancing if I was still married to him, And not
(34:39):
because he said don't do those things, but because of
the way I was being and showing up in that marriage,
and it just required something of me that was taking
a lot from me. So now I have totally different friends.
I have my own life. I love what you call
the Triple Joy group I have, I have. I actually
(35:02):
have another friend. I pulled in another friend who's a
natural path. He does frequency medicine too and dances relationship.
Oh she's she's a friend girl.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Like if you is there is there a new person
in your life?
Speaker 2 (35:18):
Oh no, not at this moment, but you know, people
come in come out like that has changed a lot too.
Like I was just dating has become so much more
simple since I started living in the Vibrant Way, started
living in Joy, started living in you know, we learned
some really basic communication communication things. By the way, the
Vibrant Way opens and closes, like about seasonally every couple months,
(35:40):
it'll open and close because it's an eight week program.
But if your listeners look at the Vibrantway dot com
and it's not open, they can join my email list
and grab the Divorce Detax, which will take them through
the first the very first thing we do in the
Vibrant Way, as well as give them two videos on
changing the energy between yourself and your ex and some
(36:03):
my thirteen most basic tips on dating with self love,
so you don't waste time on the wrong guys. And
so that's one of the things that like it's been
my own growth journey and to like learn when to
just peacefully be like, uh, yeah, this isn't for me. Yeah,
And you choose you.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
You choose you.
Speaker 2 (36:22):
Exactly and very easily and without having to explain, like
go through the drama of explaining and telling them and teaching.
Speaker 1 (36:29):
And there's so much at one of my friends, she's
always like when we leave each other, every single time
we leave each other, peace, love, joy, happiness, triple joy.
Like that's what she says to us every time she leaves.
I love it. And yeah, it's the way when you
look at life like that, it's everything changes within you.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
And when you speak it like that, like speaking what
you speak, Like if if your listeners take anything away,
what pay attention to what you're saying about yourself, about men,
about marriage, about your life. You were speaking that into
your energetic feel I do frequency therapy as well, and
I have to help people understand like you are your
(37:10):
own bioresonance device, and the words that you say, the
things that you speak are what color you to you
know color, It's like putting on not rose colored glasses,
but something else colored classes where you're like looking for
the evidence that life is hard, that divorce sucks, or
you know, like all of everything going to be right,
(37:30):
but when you're saying, hey, peace, love and happiness, okay,
let me look.
Speaker 1 (37:34):
For that right right, amazing. I love your journey, and
I love that your journey brought you to doing what
you're doing. I'm going to have you back absolutely again.
I'm going to talk to you off the record, off
this podcast about something else, and then we can bring
it back to this podcast. What this was like so
(37:54):
eye opening and I love everything about it. I can't
thank you enough.
Speaker 2 (37:57):
Thank you for having me on.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Oh thank you. Well, you'll be back. Needlekuda Divorce and
Family laws attorneys have guided Connecticut and New York families
through complex divorce actions, contested child custody, and alimony disputes
for over thirty years. Their Connecticut and New York attorneys
have extensive experience in family matters involving substance abuse, domestic violence,
(38:20):
mental illness, and many other X factors that can complicate
a divorce. Their attorneys adeptly manage privacy and reputation. Concerns
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