Chapter 20 - The Search - Grace Hill

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Naguib Mahfouz, Egyptian literature, existentialism, identity, love, relationships, social commentary, cultural norms, social class, personal growth, literary style, literary legacy, literary analysis, literary adaptation, literary criticism, Cairo, modernity, cultural influence, societal expectations, individualism, human nature, psychological analysis, Arab culture, family, urbanization

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Chapter twenty, a nurse stepped upto the doctor's desk. A new girl
is here, ready for duty.Is there any special place you want to
put her, she asked in alow tone. The doctor looked up with
a frown. One of those halftrained Americans, I suppose, he growled.
Well, every little helps. I'dgive a good deal for half a

(00:21):
dozen fully trained nurses. Just now, suppose you send her to relieve miss
Jennings. She can't do any harmto number twenty nine. Isn't there any
hope for him? The nurse asked, a shade of sadness in her eyes.
I'm afraid not, said the doctorshortly. He won't take an interest
in living. That's the trouble.He isn't dying of his wounds. Something

(00:43):
is troubling him, but it's nouse trying to find out what. He
shuts up like a clam. Thenew nurse flushed outside the door as she
heard herself discussed, and shut herfirm little lips in a determined way as
she followed the head nurse down thelong row of cot to an alcove at
the end, where a screen shutthe patient from view. Miss Jennings,

(01:04):
a plain girl with tired eyes,gave a few directions, and she was
left with her patient. She turnedtoward the cot and stopped with a soft
gasp of recognition, her face growingwhite and set as she took in the
dear, familiar outline of the youngface before her. Every word she had

(01:25):
heard outside the doctor's office rang distinctlyin her ears. He was dying.
He did not want to live.With another gasp that was like a sob,
she slipped to her knees beside thecot, forgetful of her duties,
of the ward outside, or ofthe possible return of the nurses. Forgetful
of everything but that he was there, her hero of the years. She

(01:48):
reached for one of his hands,the one that was not bandaged, and
she laid her soft cheek against itand held her breath to listen. Perhaps,
even now, behind that quiet face, the spirit had departed beyond her
grasp. There was no flutter ofthe eyelids. Even she could not see
that he still breathed, although hishand was not cold, and his face,

(02:09):
when she touched it still seemed human. She drew closer in an agony
of fear, and laid her lipsagainst his cheek, with one hand about
his other cheek. Her lips wereclose to his ear. Now, John,
she whispered softly, John, mydear knight. There was a quiver
of the eyelids, now a faint, hesitating sigh. She touched her lips

(02:32):
to his and spoke his name again. A faint smile flickered over his features,
as if he were seeing other worldsof beauty that had no connection here,
But she still continued to press herface against his cheek and whisper his
name. At last, he openedhis eyes with a bewildered, wondering gaze

(02:52):
and saw her. The old dearsmile broke forth. Ruth, you hear?
Is this heaven? Not yet,she whispered softly. But it's Earth
and the war is over. I'vecome to help you get well and take
you home. It's really you,and you're not missing any more. Then,

(03:14):
without any excuse at all, shelaid her lips on his forehead and
kissed him. She had read herpermit in his eyes. His well arm
stole out and pressed her to himhungrily. It's really you, and you
don't belong to anybody else, heasked, anxiously, searching her face for
his answer, Oh, John,I never did belong to anybody else but

(03:38):
you all my life, ever sinceI was a little girl, I've thought
you were wonderful. Didn't you knowthat? Didn't you see down at camp?
I'm sure it was written all overmy face. His hand crept up
and pressed her face close against his. Oh, my darling, he breathed,
My darling, the most wonderful girlin the world. When the doctor

(04:01):
and nurse pushed back the screen andentered the little alcove, the new nurse
sat demurely at the foot of thecot, but a little while later the
voice of the patient rang out joyously, Doctor, how soon can I get
out of this? I think I'vestayed here about long enough. The wondering
doctor touched his patient's forehead, lookedat him, keenly felt his pulse with

(04:24):
practiced finger, and replied, I'vebeen thinking you'd get to this spot pretty
soon, some beef tea nurse andmake it good and strong. We've got
to get this fellow on his feetpretty quick, for I can see he's
about done lying in bed. Thenthe wounds came in for attention, and
Ruth stood bravely and watched, quiveringin her heart over the sight, yet

(04:46):
never flinching in her outward calm.When the dressing of the wounds was over,
the doctor stood back and surveyed hispatient. Well, you're in pretty
good shape now, and if youkeep on you can leave here in about
a week. Thank fortune, thereisn't any more front to go back to.
But now, if you don't mind, I'd like to know what's made
this marvelous change in you. Thelight broke out on Cameron's face anew.

(05:12):
He looked at the doctor, smiling, and then he looked at Ruth and
reached out his hand to get hers. You see, he said, I
we miss McDonald's from my hometown.And I see, said the doctor,
looking quizzically from one happy face tothe other. But hasn't she always been
from your hometown? Cameron twinkled withhis old Irish grin. Always, he

(05:38):
said, solemnly. But you see, she hasn't always been here, I
see, said the doctor again,looking quizzically into the sweet face of the
girl and doing reverence to her purebeauty with his gaze. I congratulate you,
corporal, he said, and thenturning to Ruth, he said earnestly,

(05:59):
and you too, madam, heis a man. If ever there
was one in the quiet evening,when the wards were put to sleep,
and Ruth sat beside his cot withher hand softly in his Cameron opened his
eyes from the nap he was supposedto be taking and looked at her with
his bright smile. I haven't toldyou the news, he said softly.

(06:20):
I have found God. I foundhim out on the battlefield, and he
is great. It's all true.But you have to search for him with
all your heart and not let anylittle old hate or anything else hinder you,
or it doesn't do any good.Ruth, with her shining eyes,
touched her lips softly to the backof his bandaged hand that lay near her,

(06:42):
and whispered softly, I have foundhim, too, dear, and
I realize that he has been closebeside me all the time. Only my
heart was so full of myself thatI never saw him before. But oh,
hasn't he been wonderful to us?And won't we have a beautiful time
living for him together the rest ofour lives. Then the bandaged hand went

(07:03):
out and folded her close, andCameron uttered his assent in words too sacred
for other ears. To hear endof chapter twenty