April 29, 2024 • 51 mins
We wrap up the third season of Columbo with a solid episode wherein Columbo (Peter Falk) is put on the case of a pair of murders including the death of police commissioner (Richard Kiley)'s wife. Written by Peter S. Fischer, the episode was directed by Falk's friend Ben Gazzara.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:23):
Welcome to The Shabby Detective, yetanother Colombo podcast. I'm your host,
Mike White, and joining me,of course, is mister Christasue and I
get to do this again, sogo ahead and roast me. But this
will be the third time I makethis joke. My appearance on this show
was spared, no expense. Theybrought it, They pulled out all the
stops to have me on this episode. No expenses were spared, if you
(00:44):
know what I mean. Richard Kylie. Oh okay, that's my third time
making a Richard Kylie Jurassic Park joke, because I believe I've made it on
Night Gallery twice because he was ontwo episodes of Night Gallery. Right,
he was the Nazi at one pointand then something else. But I remember
Father Million rolled his eyes it methe last time at it's all just do
it again? Why not? Fuckit? Who cares? Man? You
(01:06):
know that movie a lot better thanI do. There are some lines for
that movie that are that occupy rentin my head, free rent free.
So yes, ah ah, that'spretty much it got Dodson here. Yeah,
it's pretty much. Any ned Relines for me, fair fair on
this episode of The Shabby Detective We'renot talking about Jurassic Park. We're talking
(01:27):
about a friend. Indeed, didthis the final the eighth episode of the
third season. Directed by Peter Falk'sgood friend Ben Gazzara and written by Peter
S. Fisher. This episode droppedOriginally May fifth, nineteen seventy four,
dropped it was nineteen seventy four.This episode aired forward over the air,
(01:53):
Yes, yes, where you hadone chance to see it, unless maybe
you were Elvis Presley and had yourown home youmatic machine where you could record
things and watch them on the theLisa Marie or whatever the plane was.
So yeah, still fucking crazy tothink about. We could just flip on
Peacock and watch episodes of Clumbo likeit's nobody's business. Like it really is
(02:15):
a time of wonder and miracles,folks that we live in. Like I
got to figure out how to turnon subtitles on there because I don't know
how to do it. This episodestars the one and only, as you
said, Richard Kylie Uh and MichaelMcGuire also, and what an unusual episode
because by the time this starts,somebody's already dead. It is Michael McGuire's
(02:43):
wife. He is Hugh Caldwell,missus Caldwell's dead, and he calls up
his old buddy Up. He's nothere, sorry, says his wife Margaret.
But our friend Mark Halpernan is overat the club, so Hugh gives
him a call over there ends upingup kind of rude to the waiter.
I think the matre d you know, just kind of walks off while he's
(03:06):
talking. But yeah, hey man, I need you to help me out.
My wife is dead. So heimmediately man Mark Helpernan is some sort
of devious motherfucker because this guy comesup with a plan to take care of
his buddy Hugh and also take careof his problem, which is his wife
(03:27):
Margaret, because she holds the pursestrings in his family. Apparently he likes
to lose quite a bit when he'sout at the club playing high stakes backgammon.
Holy cow, you're gonna need apair of devils to get me out
of that one. Look at thosetwo fives. Wow, so so over
the top. So, Chris,what did you think of a friend?
(03:51):
Indeed, it is unlike any Columboepisode we've seen up until this point in
so many ways. I mean,look, Valever is here, He's integral
to the story, and you almostforget that he's there for a good portion
of it. He's been in whatthree to this is his third appearance in
Colombo. There's a lot of stuffgoing on. I think it's a fun
(04:13):
episode. I actually have very fewproblems with it. I actually think it
makes use of its time rather welltoo. I mean it's an hour and
a half, so it's an hourthirty eight, so it's a feature length,
and for it being feature length,I didn't find it to drag a
whole lot. There's one part thatkind of drags, And again I'm just
wondering, like, who the fuckwanted to do this if it wasn't just
(04:33):
Peter Falk and Ben Gazara, whichI kind of think it was given what
we know about them and given whatwe've seen with Peter Falk just wanting to
do Peter Falk things sometimes in thisshow. But all that aside, I
mean, what a wild episode.At one point, Richard Kylie just jumps
out of a helicopter right above aswimming pool, Like that's a thing that
(04:54):
happens in this episode. That's justI don't know, it's interesting, and
you mentioned it, you know,we kind of haven't given away the other
part of the episode that's just isinsane. This is the first time that
Colombo knows the person who's the murderer, like straight up knows him. Yeah,
because that is a really good twist. Not only does he know this
(05:15):
guy, but this guy is essentiallyhis boss. It's the commissioner of the
police. Like that for me isthe is the real success of the episode
is It's not that I didn't seeit coming because I read the description of
the episode, so I knew,But it's still done so well that I
forgot that that was part of itbecause there is so much else going on.
There are enough moving pieces within it. Yeah, Peacock. Unfortunately,
(05:38):
like the episode synopsis or descriptions arepretty bold for the most part and say
exactly what's going on. But Ican imagine not knowing that twist and it
happening. Because for me, whenthat twist happens and it turns out like
he's literally Colombo's boss, oh,like that raises the stakes. I don't
think they go as far as theycould have. I think they kind of
(06:00):
introduce it and then don't do asmuch as I would have with it.
But I like that. That's aninteresting angle that this episode takes because it
makes it feel very different and alot of the episodes very different. I'm
sure we'll kind of get into it, but it's a very different episode of
Colombo in a very good way.I really like this one. I love
that it is a policeman that he'sinvestigating. I love just how wiley he
(06:25):
is, and that you know thiscriminal is really I mean he I don't
know when he comes up with allof the moves that he's about to make,
but it feels like he's had thisin his back pocket for however long.
Like, Okay, if somebody comesto me and says they want me
to cover up a murder, I'mgoing to have to have them do me
(06:45):
a solid in return and cover forme killing my wife. I kept comparing
this in my mind to strangers ona train. A little different than strangers
on a train in that there iswell, there's no agreement between Dye and
Bruno, that one that we're goingto kill each other's problems that we have.
But this whole thing of I nowhave information over you. You're gonna
(07:10):
have to do me a solid now, quite pro quo. And now you're
gonna have to help me cover upthe murder of my wife since I helped
you cover up the murder of yourwife. And just all those things where
he's like, oh, I sawsomeone across the way, and then it
gives the press conference and he makesit seem like his wife saw the quote
unquote murderer as well, and theall the journalists are like, oh did
(07:35):
your wife what did your wife see? What'd your wife see? And then
when she dies, he's like,oh, oh darn, oh damn,
my slip of the tongue. Margaretnever saw anything. The killer must have
come back and thought that she sawhim. It was like, Wow,
you're really laying it on thick here. But I love it. I love
(07:57):
this episode. Yeah, Richard Kylieis a real piece in this movie peace
being of shit And and that's thething I mean, for me, these
episodes really are working, you know, a firing on all cylinders. When
the villain is as devious and aslike able to navigate his own situation,
(08:20):
in this case, his situation aswell as Colombo can chase after them.
I like that. It's, youknow, one mouse running around and a
cat's chasing after him. But themouse has many holes to go through,
but at some point, although therewill be no more holes to run through,
and the cat's gonna get you.We see that here. I think
that the way that they handle ithere is very interesting. But to your
point, I like that the stakesare raised. I like that Richard Kylie,
(08:41):
like I wouldn't have been surprised ifhe'd gotten away with it. He
does a good enough job. Heslips up a little bit. I mean
the way he slips up is likeshockingly idiotic, in like, it's shocking
how much of an idiot this guy, who's been pretty smart for the most
part, has been I do.I love that he is able to more
or less navigate the entire situation upuntil, like the last moment he has
(09:07):
to get gotten by Colombo to becaught. He is caught in the act
by Colombo, which I like that. I like that we get all the
way to the very last moment andthen he gets caught. So yeah,
and again, Richard Kylie's just he'sup there now with some of the best,
with some of the best batties onthis show. Well, it makes
me wonder, is he the guythat Jean Barry's doctor Ray Fleming was reaching
(09:31):
out to when he's like, getthis guy off of my case because he
was friends with the commissioner. Idon't know if it's the same commissioner or
not, but I would love tothink that the commissioner is the same guy
that Richard Kylie is, the guywho said Okay, yeah, no problem,
I'll take care of Colombo and thenturns around and goes, Columbo,
something's up with this guy. Youreally need to press this investigation. I
(09:54):
would love if he I mean,he has to know how smart Colombo is,
because to your point, everything thathe's doing, all of the slip
ups are stupid little things, arelike things that other criminals could probably get
away with. This whole thing ofoh, she keeps her nightgown under the
pillow, but he took a nightgownout of the closet and put that on
her. So that doesn't make anysense for the way that this was.
(10:18):
If it was the husband, hewould have known that. So it had
to be somebody else besides the husband. And it's just like all these signs
pointing at Richard Kylie's character, it'slike okay, and yeah, everything that
he does, it's like, ohno, it shouldn't have been that.
It should have been this, youknow, Oh, the knobs were wiped
clean, so she would have leftfingerprints. The only fingerprints were there were
(10:43):
on this phone and not this otherphone. All of these little things.
And then when it comes to god, I love Columbo when he finds that
the victim, the Margaret, hasdrowned, and the way he walks into
that bathroom and just walk right inand goes right into the tub one of
the best shots for me. Ilove it. I really like the bathtub
(11:05):
payoff that it's it's ultimately I thinkthat this is the bathtub that gets Richard
Kylie more or less right. Likeat least my perception of the end of
the episode is it's it's as muchthe bathtub as it is anything else.
Because what happens when you drown someoneThey inhale water, what happens to the
water stays in the lungs? Whatdoes water in a bathtub have soap?
What does water in a pool nothave soap? So And what's funny is
(11:30):
the episode kind of leads you downthe path of like, well, there's
not gonna be anything there, that'swhat you think, because they say like
the chlorine more or less disappears,but no, like the soap is there,
So that's the indicator. I mean, what's funny is we say that
Richard Kylie's smart, But I wouldwonder because you kind of brought it up
and maybe I don't know, youcan kind of have this discussion, but
(11:50):
is he smart or is he thebiggest fucking idiot that we've met because he
literally knows what Colombo's deal is.Like you said, I would actually be
curious listeners, because I know you'relistening. Please let us know how many
times those of you who watch theshow all the time, which I know
that there are plenty of you aswell, up until this point, up
to the end of season three,how many times has the commissioner been mentioned?
(12:13):
Because now we know who that is, at least one of them.
Possibly, I don't are there morethan one commissioner. He's the deputy commissioner
right well, And there's also youknow, it's been quite a few years
since Colombo put that crafty psychiatrist behindbars, so we also don't know like
the chronological time of Columbo, likeis this all taking place and like,
(12:35):
oh, he just busts these guysevery other day, like how much time
is in between it. But that'swhy I wonder, like, or is
he just a massive moron who knowsColumbo's gonna come investigate and knows that Colombo
is this like powerhouse of a detectiveand he does this anyways, like you've
done the thing that you're putting peoplein jail for, okay, and now
you're going to jail because you wenttoe to toe with Colombo. Well,
(12:58):
I'd love the other parts of thisbecause this whole episode is just setting stuff
up and knocking it down, settingit up and knocking it down. This
whole thing of Kylie pretends that he'sa thief that has been hitting all of
these these upper Lachelon mansions. He'sgoing around, and so he just goes
(13:18):
through his friend's wives a jewelry boxand takes all this jewelry, leaves the
ring on her finger. That wasa stupid thing. But then when the
one guy's just like, oh yeah, no, it's a big old hunk
of glass, and then he realized, oh shit, all of her jewelry
is completely useless. It's a figIf he really was the thief, he
(13:43):
wouldn't have stole any of that stuff. He would have realized that it was
all glass and it was all justcompletely complete garbage. I mean I love
that kind of stuff. And theway, you know, you mentioned val
Avery and how yeah you kind offorget that he's there. But I think
they did a good job of likeshowing Kylie on TV and then you cut
to the bar and there's Val Averyand he's making it kind of a scene
(14:05):
with his girlfriend, his squeeze whatevershe is. She wishes she was my
wife. Yeah, boy, yeah, I really wish I was married to
you. The guy who spends moretime in the jug than than out of
it. Yeah, I mean he'sin the bar every time we see him
for the most part. Yeah yeah. The only time we don't see him
is when he's at his apartment.Oh wait, that's not his apartment.
(14:28):
Talk about one of the best twists. I love this. This twist is
up there with suitable for framing forme. When it's like, no,
sir, this is my apartment.I signed the least this morning. Oh
that's the moment of like, that'sthe moment where the shit hits the fan
and it's like two minutes more.The end of the episode, it's it's
(14:50):
great. Like the way Columbo catchesRichard Kylie in this episode is pretty good.
And and the fake outs are area lot. There are a fair
amount of them in this episode.Like we mentioned with the chlorine, like
we mentioned with the diamond ring,like or I guess the glass ring,
the cubics of coranium even maybe likethose things are fake outs, but they're
they're executed all the way to theend, like they go all the way
(15:13):
with them. They don't pull anypunches. It's not like, oh,
well, we'll mention this thing andthen not mention it again. Not only
they mention it, then we havethe scene of Colombo going and investigating it.
Yeah, and I don't need thatevery time, but I appreciate it
when they do it, and theydid it really well here. Yeah,
the whole thing with him going tothe use car salesman, I like that,
and pretty much is just like thereis a lot going on in this
(15:35):
episode, Jesus. I mean,yeah, you're right ninety four minutes and
for me, I'm curious what yourtake is on this. For me,
nothing's wasted. But what was thescene that was getting to you? It's
after he goes and meets Richard Kylie'swife. And then it's just like him
aimlessly wandering around in his car fora while, and we like watch him
in the neighborhood and they like stopsin his car. It's it's the gag
(15:58):
of getting his car to break downagain. It's like, I don't know,
why is this what I thought itwas so he could like see if
he could see or if he couldgo in the house fast enough. And
that did actually be the case thatthe woman that the wife of Richard Kylee
wouldn't see, but it wasn't that. It ended up being just a gag
to get his car to break downagain, which worked really well. At
(16:19):
the opening of the episode that forme is one of these like iconic now
for me Columbo moments of him.I couldn't figure out what the fuck he
was doing, even when the doorwas open, and it's like, oh,
I lost my cigar. And thenhe's like, and this is the
commissioner's car. It's like, Wow, it answered the question I was wondering.
The moment he answered he says like, this is the commissioner's car is
like, oh, he does knowColombo, Okay, because that's the question
(16:41):
you have immediately when it's a copit's like, does Colombo know them?
Is Colombo where that they exist?And like yes, And I think for
me, that's the other really smartchoice of the episode is making it someone
that at least knows who Colombo isby first name, at least we don't
have the opportunity to read the scriptsfor every Colombo like we did for Colchak.
(17:03):
We read retty much everything, butwith Colombo, it's like, yeah,
once you get to like season eight, so you get a couple season
ten, you get three episodes.Season three, there's one script that I
have available to me, and thatis a friend, Indeed's script. So
it was great to be able tocompare this. But I have to say
(17:25):
they followed Peter Fisher's script so exactly. They did a really good job.
The only thing that I noticed thatwas different was there was a line about
somebody get Colombo, and they said, oh, we had to send a
car for him, so there's moreabout the car stuff in there, and
then the car pulls up and thenhe gets out and does that. I
(17:48):
think it worked better with the waythat they shot it, where we just
are introduced to Colombo. What sixteenminutes in before the second murder even takes
place. I mean we've been talkinga lot. I mean the entire time
we've done Chabby Detective. When doesColombo come in? What does he know
at that time? We've seen himcome in before a murder has taken place,
(18:11):
like the any important storm. Heis there and the woman comes in,
who's the boy? The girlfriend ofthe brother, and so he is
tipped off to this stuff before heever gets the call to go out to
the vineyard and find out this stuff. So, yeah, we've had him
introduced before, like there's a deadbody, though I think the body is
(18:33):
probably dead by that time. Butyeah, this was the first time where
we have him coming out here.First time we have a body already on
the scene. First time he's goingagainst one of his own, a fellow
police officer. Yeah. I reallylike how they are playing with the form
in this, and this really givesme hope as far as okay, you
(18:55):
can do a lot of different thingswith Columba, because a few times this
season it's like, Okay, thenthis is gonna happen. Then this is
gonna happen, Then this is gonnahappen. It's always fun watching how Faulk
plays it. But this really playedwith the form for me, and that's
why I also really enjoyed the episodebecause there there's some interesting things going on
that are a typical of the showwe've seen up until this point. Also
(19:18):
mention to me, Michael maguire iskind of sympathetic as a character. Oh
yeah, which is interesting. Imean Richard Kyle's Halprinan is not. I
mean, this guy is like,he's it seems like he's looking I mean,
like you mentioned, he's looking fora reason to kill his wife,
clearly, but I also think he'sjust looking for a reason to kill somebody
because to be fair, like awfullycomfortable around dead bodies too. Like the
(19:40):
question I have is how did thisguy become Commissioner of Race? Like,
holy shit, the moral compass onthis guy to say it's pointing in the
wrong direction is to undersell it.It's pointing in the wrong direction, and
he's following it with glee because theyeah, like you mentioned already, the
the the speed and efficiency which withwhich he is able to create the idea
(20:02):
of we're going to frame this guyand you're gonna be fine. And then
not only that, but I'm gonnaquid pro quoet and you're gonna help me
when I kill my wife. Yeah, Like this is he's probably the worst
character we've gotten on this show sofar because on top of everything else,
he doesn't even kill anybody until thesecond act of the episode, but all
the terrible stuff that he's doing,like it it justifies and explains why he's
(20:26):
going to kill his wife. Oh, because he's just a bastard like through
and through. Oh yeah, well, at least with Michael McGuire, his
character kills out of passion. Youknow he's having any arguments. Yeah,
squeezes her neck too hard. Imean, yeah, he's a murderer.
I'm not trying to say like it'sexcusable, but it is very much crime
(20:47):
of passion, whereas what Kylie isdoing is so premeditated, Like that is
the definition of premeditation. It iswild. It's like comparing Jeffrey Tomer and
like a jilted lover, right,Like one of these people is just sitting
there just like enjoying it, andthe other person probably would never kill somebody
(21:07):
else if they were given an opportunity. Again, like it's crimes of passion.
Exist in that moment of uncontrollable emotion, right, and we don't really
see it in the episode. Soagain we just have to take the Michael
McGuire character at as his word.But I like the idea of a sympathetic
villain in this show because that's thereality. Like these kind of things do
(21:30):
happen, Like people die every day, and sometimes they die in crimes of
passion. There are even laws andrules against it in terms of crimes of
passion, how they're persecuted, howthey're prosecuted, how they're defended, how
the people go to jail for it, so it's an understood thing in the
criminal justice system. I like thatthis episode is like, Okay, it's
not him that's the problem. Somuch like in a lot of ways,
(21:51):
I wonder if Richard Kylie had said, like the best thing for you to
do is just go admit it andmove on. I think this guy would
have. I think Michael McGuire wouldhave. But again, like you mentioned,
like Richard Kylie's just mister burns inwaiting for somebody, somebody that he
knows to kill somebody, like tintinghis fingers and waiting. That's what it
feels like and I mean that isthe case, but that's why he's such
(22:11):
a good villain. I think thevillains in this show that I really resonated
with are the ones that are justlike bastards through and through because they're having
the best time. Like, yes, Johnny Cash is great, he's pretty
sympathetic, but Robert Cope, RichardKylie like Cheese, these dusers, and
I mean in a lot of ways, maybe not playing it at the same
level, but like a Donald pleasanceas well, is like enjoying the fact
(22:33):
that he did this because he's gainingsomething from it. This is really a
great entry into the show. Youmentioned val Avery, and I do like
that he has. This is asubstantial role. He's not just renting a
boat to Suzanne Pluchette. But theother person who's in here is our good
friend Arlene Martel. She's back again, and this time she's actually on screen,
(22:56):
because the last time she was supposedto be around was I think the
double Exposure episode, the Subliminal Messageone where she plays Tanya Baker and she's
only talked about and never actually seen. But here we get to see her
one more time, and that's whenColombo. I can't even remember why he
(23:18):
goes, Oh he's going in totalk about the jewelry stuff. And while
he's there, while he's at thejewelers, Uh, yeah, I need
a new band for this watch,right, it's a really good watch.
You know, I've had this fora few years, you know. Oh
yeah, that'll be twenty five dollars. No, no, I don't need
the new the watch. I justneed the bath. I love Colombo so
(23:41):
much as just a character like hehe really is like one of the like
Semino pop culture detectives as far asI'm concerned, Like he's just it's pretty
much just Peter Folk, which Ithink anybody who watches this show and loves
it like you do, and I'mI'm coming to and I obviously have a
lot and enjoyed what we've wanted.Like it's so much just him that like
(24:03):
not that they don't make him likethis anymore, but like people aren't doing
this thing anymore the way that PeterFalk was where it's like I'm gonna work
on this show and I'm not evensure I like it, but I'm going
to give it everything that I have. Like we know and have heard of
through plenty of news, you know, entertainment news things. How many shows
die because nobody's committed to it.And we know that Peter Faulk in a
lot of ways was his commitment tothe show varied. But I don't think
(24:26):
he ever phones it in, evenwhen I think, even when I think
he might be wanting to, Like, he's just so goddamn good in this
show. And I know we sayit like every episode and it shouldn't come
as a surprise anymore. But everytime I watch a new episode with him,
I'm like, and he just givesyou something else, some other little
thing different. Yeah, he's he'sgreat. I excuse me, man,
(24:48):
I didn't mean to scare you,Like, oh Jesus Christ can't take this
guy anywhere. And I'm wondering,I have a question for you. Are
those pictures at the end just picturesthat he found somewhere and he's passing off
as his niece and nephew because likeagain, like so, is Columbo just
renting the apartment just to rent it? Or is he kicked or does he
just live in his car and hehas no family? Like just making it
(25:12):
all up. Yeah, I feellike he has been this whole time,
and this episode where he is kindof screams to me like divorce dad energy,
like he's he's like, you know, like he underwear, he moved
in his his T shirts, hemoved in everything. Yeah those yeah,
(25:32):
yeah yeah, Rachel Blade Runner.Yeah, he's just like, oh,
this is my backstory, yeah,because you created it that way. I
always wonder, like, I mean, is Colombo for real? I never
know, But the point is youdon't know, which is how he's able
to navigate around these criminals. Sodefintely is they have no idea what to
make of him, except for RichardKylie, who should have known better,
(25:55):
like of all the people man,So I'm saying, like, this guy's
a big dummy. He's smart,but he is ultimately like the biggest dummy
we've seen. Oh yeah, heshould have been Like, well, I
need Ricky Brockman to come in hereand he can do this whole murder investigation.
Keep Columbo the fuck away from me, Like I'm gonna go kill my
wife and like San Luis Obisbo orsomething or like in the middle of Bakersfield,
(26:18):
just so I don't have to haveColombo come out and deal with it.
It'll be the local cops, notthe LAPD. Yeah, the old
James l Roy Special. Yeah,I get the Sheriff's department exactly. Yeah,
I don't cat the cops get theSheriff's department. But that's but that's
the thing, Like, like we'vesaid, like with Colombo being just the
powerhouse of a character that he is, it's hard for me to believe that
the police commissioner wouldn't know what hisdeal is. But yeah, I love
(26:44):
how I love how dastardly he is, and I love how much Peter Falk
in this episode specifically, I don'tfeel like I could. I don't feel
like I know immediately when he showsup that he knows. I think it
takes him quite some time in thisepisode to get to the point where he
has quit it to other more orless. Yeah, I'm trying to think
of what the first clue is thathe might see. I mean, it
(27:06):
could be the nightgown under the pillow. I think the door handle is the
first thing. I think He's like, why are these handles? Like didn't
you like dust these handles? Andthey were like nothing. It's little things
that just keep adding up and addingup. And I love to the whole
thing where he's like, I can'tfill in this report. Yeah, I'm
still working on it. There's afew things because I think I was doing
(27:27):
that and saying that it's the captainwho's on his ass, you know,
and it's like, oh, Igot a just a few more questions.
You know, you got to fillin all these things for his report.
This time it's like, ah,sorry, Commissioner, I can't get you
this report. I'm still working.It's still a few things just not adding
up for me. I love it, yah know. He's Columbo's great in
(27:49):
this episode. I mean, Ithink Richard Kylie's great too. And I
also really like I mean again,I like the idea of having a third
party, the val Avery character whohas his own autonomy and machinations here because
he's just as our friends in BarneyMiller know, he's just a thief.
He ain't no murderer, which theysee plenty of in Barney Miller. Like
(28:10):
most of the time, the peoplethat are being booked in the twelfth are
just common criminals or people who haveproblems with grammar, and here it feels
that same way where it's like,okay, like normally Colombo is brought into
these things, and he's brought intoit, so there's a person you can
point at and be like, thisis the person here. I don't think
(28:30):
he knows it's Richard Kylee for quitesome time, like at least the halfway
through the episode. Could see that. I could see that. I tend
to give Colombo the benefit of thedoubt and think that he knows immediately.
But I can see your point.I could see him not actually being able
to add it all up until Imean it's still pretty early in the affair,
(28:51):
but yeah, until that beginning ofthe second act. Well, and
again it's some of that like justtoo close to be able to tell,
right because he's in the police,Like this guy's the police, can I
mean, once it comes to thesecond murder and there's that whole like,
oh, you saw him out ofthe uh from the helicopter and you knew
that, oh okay, right hidingbehind the car. It's a very interesting
(29:14):
episode because again having a val averycharacter that has his own autonomy. There
hasn't been a character like that yetwho's like I didn't kill anybody, Yeah,
like I didn't kill a single personand they're trying to pin this on
me, like, no fucking way. I mean again, going to prison
for murder is very different than beinga common burglar. So I like that
there's like an added steak and addedcomplexity to all of this. We've talked
(29:37):
so many times before about Colombo whenhe knows somebody's innocent, like talking to
the ant in the Suitable for Framingepisode Kim Hunter, and he's just like,
yeah, no, she didn't doit. And of course you know
that that drives Ross Martin fucking crazy. What are you talking about now?
Of course she did with this one. You know, it's like he talks
to the guy from the used carlot who wants to eighty dollars for his
(30:00):
car, which makes me laugh quitea bit. Yeah, no, that's
okay. I don't need to comein and see this other girl that you
hooked up with when the wife ofthe guy was busy. That's fine.
I know you're all set. Samething with al Avery, he's just like,
no, I don't think you're amurderer. He just flat out no,
no, I know you didn't dothis. And then he's able to
(30:22):
win the trust over because he hasto have val Avery go along with him
on this stuff. He has tobe part of this dupe to get the
commissioner up to the apartment and allthis stuff. And I just love that.
I love how Colombo has one filemade up and just puts that fake
address in there and he's like,you only two people that ever saw were
(30:45):
me and you, and you cameover here and you planted this evidence.
This is my apartment. I lovethat. So my question is, did
when Colombo gives the information and let'shelp enunciate it, he knows or is
that the final piece of confirmation thathe needs. I mean, I think
he knows, but yeah, that'sthat's the way that he's going to get
him. The Michael Maguire character,I feel like he could be swayed into
(31:08):
admitting what he did. Richard Kyliehas to be caught, like that's how
that's how malignant of a shithead heis. He's like he has He's like
Ross Martin. He has to becaught in the act. And it's like,
that's the only way this is gonnahappen, because this guy is going
It's like in Strangers on a Trainwhere Bruno refuses to say anything up until
(31:29):
I don't know what you're talking about, and then his body involuntary lets us
know, oh, by the way, he's he was in on it,
and nothing this guy was saying wasa liah was all the truth. I
like that similarly here, like RichardKylie up until the moment where it's like,
there's nothing else to prove here,you can't do anything about this.
You have made it so and thatis what it is. I love that.
(31:49):
I do like that that kind offormula of this show that they've done
a couple times, which is notletting Columbo have this twenty minute setup thing
like this is all just like boomboom boom boom boom, episode's done,
Like I think of the Miguel Farrarepisode like two episodes ago, like that,
the end of the episode takes liketwenty minutes because they're like, well,
he did it, and we're gonnatake the sun out and then we're
(32:12):
gonna give him time to wait andthen we're gonna book him. Here.
It's just like nope, we gotthis and this and this and that's it.
We got him, and he's justgonna admit it again. I don't
know why he would admit it.Like I feel like you're the police officer.
Like the first thing you do islawyer the fuck up. And that's
the thing. Like, this isone of the few cases where'm like comb
Columbo's kind of foils in this episode. I think Richard Kylie could still get
away with it realistically, Like Idon't. I don't think any jury is
(32:36):
going to prosecute him easily. Alot of circumstantial evidence. I wouldn't be
surprised if they got Michael McGuire toturn on him, to turn state's evidence.
Yeah, that's I mean, that'swhat I was thinking. I mean,
that's the way I saw this playingout after like the two minutes or
the two months after the episode.Is Michael McGuire's character is is kind of
(32:57):
coerced or more or less feels guiltyenough to admit it. But yeah,
like it's funny because like I'm notsaying, there's not a lot to pin
it on Richard Kylie, but it'skind of just one thing. It's the
one thing of he went to theaddress because again can't prove he has no
proof that he murdered his wife.The wife is dead, but he it's
not like there's handprints or anything else. The only proof that she didn't die
(33:19):
in the bath in the school isthe bathtub. Yeah, but there is
the evidence that he planted there,so that's a little bit more less than
circumstantial. But yeah, I knowwhat you're saying. And yeah, I
could see them being like, hey, Michael McGuire, uh, we know
you killed your wife, But thepunishment doesn't have to be going over to
(33:40):
like you know, sing sing orany of these types of places. You
could go to like the club,med prison and spend your time there.
Yeah, if you turn stool pigeon, Yeah, it seems like a good
deal to me. Yeah. Andthat's the thing. What's interesting about these
two people murder episodes is they haven'treally mined this dynamic the way that this
(34:01):
episode did. And I think thatthis is the most interesting way to do
it because similar I mean similarly toStrangers on the Train, but also very
different. Like you mentioned, thereasoning and the autonomy of each character is
very different in each of the pieces. I prefer it here. I prefer
it here only because they don't feelI'm not saying there, and I don't
(34:22):
think the characters are flat and strangerson a train, But Strangers on a
Train's tension kind of plateause at somepoint, and this just keeps going and
going and going because we as theaudience are in on it in both of
these cases. But in Strangers ona Train, I just I think that
there's in terms of the tension buildingand the interesting interactions, I think this
(34:43):
does it a little bit better.If we're talking about this kind of scenario
of two people killing two ostensibly randompeople. Guy is the typical Hitchcock wrong
man, and he has to provethat he's not the wrong man or that
he is the wrong man, andhe has to go out there and like
he becomes the investigator. He's gettinghis fiancee involved in He's getting is what
(35:07):
is his sister the Patricia Hitchcock characterinvolved in it or sister in law,
like getting all of these parties involvedin trying to prove himself innocent, as
opposed to having this dadlike investigator whocan come in and just be like no,
no, sorting it all out.Which I appreciate that, but I'm
curious how you liked Strangers on aTrain. So it's like, I think
(35:30):
the second Hitchcock movie I've seen,I got no problem admitting that he's just
one of the few directors I havenot made time for. I enjoyed it.
I think it was pretty good.I think it was pretty good,
and I think it was also interestingto compare and contrast it against this and
that. And then there's what's funnyis there's an episode of Tales from the
Crypt that is very similar to bothof these things. That it's again,
(35:52):
you know, the whole third actof it takes place on a train and
there's some intrigue as to who killedwhom and how as the person who died
who killed them and wine all that. So I enjoyed it. I mean,
again, it's definitely within my wheelhouseof the kinds of things that I
like, and how the performances werefantastic. Yeah, I'm glad that you
liked it. And I really likedthat one. I especially like the Patricia
(36:15):
Hitchcock character and how she becomes thestand in for the Teresa character because she's
got the same types of glasses.The use of the glasses I thought was
really nice, especially the murder beingreflected in them. I mean, it's
not as as cool as Robert Culp'sglasses in Colombo, but you know,
it was definitely pretty nice. Andyeah, when he sees Patricia Hitchcock and
(36:38):
then you get the flame in herglasses, I thought that was really nice
too. I was about to say, like that that whole picture in the
glasses thing. They've done that onthis show. Oh yeah, yeah,
Culpin Death lends a hand. Yeah, and then I think we also saw
it on What Night Gallery where theydid that with I think, so yeah,
yeah, I like, I mean, I like it. I think
(37:00):
that it's an interesting stylistic choice.And what's even more impressive is that it's
done physically, Like this is nota digital This is not a digital thing
by any stretch of the imagination.So it makes me even more impressed because
I'm like, oh, okay,so you actually had to do this and
double expose it and all that,Like yeah, that's Hitchcock has an eye
for the thematic for sure, Likehe knows, he knows just how to
(37:23):
set and light things. He's themaster of suspense for reason. Oh yeah,
Well, and then you get allthose great double entendres and just that
weird sexual attraction that Bruno has toguy and this guy giving it back,
is he not? I mean,just yeah, all of that, and
that it was based on the highSmith, and she's got homosexual characters like
(37:47):
crazy in her books. And soI'm not sure. I've never read Strangers
on the Train, but I wouldnot be surprised if Hitchcock even pumped that
up a little bit more just tryingto fuck with the censors. Yeah,
I mean I was reading about thehomo eroticism of it and all of that,
and it's there. I don't thinkit's like, I don't think it
beats you over the head with him, but it's it's there enough. Right.
(38:10):
Robert Walker, the father of RobertWalker Junior, who we just saw
in The Mind Over Mayhem, niceright, right right, I can totally
see when I think about their faces, I'm like, oh, I can
totally see that, especially run theeyes right. Yeah. I you know,
I'm glad I watched Strangers on aTrain. What's funny is I I
(38:34):
watched truly, madly, deeply,and in that movie they talk about Strangers
on a Train, And I recordedan episode of that today, and we're
recording this today, and it's likeweird synchronicity for anybody that's interested. The
episode of Tales from the Crypt thatis a oh. It even says it's
an homage to Strangers on a Train. It's the sixth episode of the fifth
(38:54):
season, so comes pretty late inthe show, and it's two for the
show, and David Paymer plays theGuy Haynes character and Vincent Spano plays the
Bruno character, and then David Pamer'swife is played by Tracy Lords of all
people. So but it's very muchlike a straight like homage to that,
(39:14):
which is also then you know thisis I think this is an homage to
that, right, Like it's not. It's not a coincidence that this is
the way that it is. Imean I was sitting there thinking strangers on
a train, and Andrey actually was, oh, this is like strangers on
a train, Like okay, good. And then of course we saw Farley
Granger. He was that satanic figurethat caused back pain in the Tales from
(39:38):
the Dark Side episode. Remember that. Oh yeah, yeah, he's great.
I mean, you know, thesetup of strangers on a train being
so iconic. I mean, look, the idea of you get on a
train and this person who's been followingyou asks you to murder someone that they
know. It's a great setup.It's a really good setup for a movie
like and that's and it's also agreat setup for form TV show or a
(40:01):
feature length movie in this film's case, or feature length episode in this episode's
case. Would be really good isif you get Billy Crystal and Danny DeVito
to kill Ann Ramsey. That wouldbe hilarious and make that Strangers on a
train? Is that a thing?Yeah, let's throw Mama from the Train.
(40:21):
Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh wow, Okay, I
mean never see I've never seen it. Is it worth watching? No,
No, it's not. Yeah,didn't sound like it. No, I
mean Danny DeVito plays kind of ahe's no Bruno because Bruno's so debonair,
Yeah, and just kind of getsgets around and all this. Let's say
(40:45):
Danny DeVito is developmentally delayed in ThrowMama from the Train. Yeah, yeah,
good times. Robert Walker's great inthe movie. Like he the way
that he plays Bruno is so specificin a way that like I'm impressed that
that's the choice that they made becauseit's a hell of a choice, and
(41:05):
I think it's a really good one, which is he's not mustache twirling,
like he's just there that scene ofguy playing tennis and all the heads are
moving back and forth, but Bruno'sjust staring at guy that whole time.
Yeah, all the heads are moving, but his being still makes it even
Repierre well. And also when hegoes to the father's house to tell him
(41:27):
and he turns the light on himthere, he's just sitting there because he
knows, because he knew he wasgetting double crossed. He is that guy.
Yeah, he's so good. Iloved the movie. It was fantastic,
and yeah, primarily because of theirperformances, Like I haven't seen enough
Hitchcock, which is clearly the case, and it's kind of depressing. Robert
Walker died like two years after Strangerson a Train came out, Like what
(41:50):
a what a shame? What anactual what an actual shame? Because that
that, for me, I thinkis the thing that I was surprised by
is again having not seen a lotof Hitchcock movie. Some of these actors
I've seen in other things, butlike Hitchcock gets the best out of everybody,
Like it's I mean, he soundedlike a pretty pain in the ass
as a director in terms of likeTarantino type, like I'm no phones on
(42:13):
set, we're doing the thing.But I can kind of respect that,
Like, we're doing the fucking thing. So we're doing the fucking thing,
and that's what we're here to do. And look, I mean the performances
he get out of he gets outof these actors are widely considered to be
their best performances in this move andStrangers on a Train. So I think
that speaks volumes to the ability ofHitchcock as a director, regardless of the
problems he had as a person andthe way he handled himself. No,
(42:36):
he was a real piece of shitin real life, but I love his
work. I mean he's kind oflike Polinski, Like I love Polanski's movies.
Guy was an asshole or is anasshole in real life. But yeah,
if you don't mind me being yourHitchcock some somalier, allow me to
recommend Rope where you get another reallygood performance from Farley Granger, but you
also get John John Dall and thenJimmy Stewart is a fantastic guice. Yeah,
(43:04):
yeah, will you be my Shirpaup the mountain of Hitchcock? Is
I will? I would be morethan happy to. I believe I'm watching
torn curtain here in the next coupleof weeks, which is as a that's
a Hitchcock one, right, it'sa Hitchcock one. But it's let's see
it less our Hitchcock and Julie Andrewsand Paul Newman. I mean, I
mean, can't be that bad,right, que me a month from now?
(43:27):
It was in fact that bad.That's the thing I mean. I
don't know much. I mean,I have never spent time looking at Hitchcock's
movies. And the only thing Isaid, like I said, I only
thing I know about him is hetreated the women on his sets pretty poorly.
So that's all I know. Andother than the fact that his movies
are widely considered to be some ofthe greatest films ever made in terms of
the genre he was making them in. But yeah, I I have not
(43:52):
seen enough. And Rope I knowis the Rope is definitely on that list,
because that's isn't that the case ofthe fucking ven Zetti BENZEDI another guy?
Right? It's not Socco and Venzetti, It's more Leopolden lob Leopolden low.
Okay, Yeah, getting my murderersconfused. Soako and Venzetti were anarchists,
I believe, right, yeah,and Leopold and Loeb were the thrill
(44:14):
killers as seen in the film Compulsion. I believe with another huge talent Orson
Wells was their lawyer in that movie, and I want to say it was
teen Stockwell and I can't remember whothe other guy was. I'll watch any
and all Hitchcock at this point because, like I said, I haven't seen
enough. But yeah, this movieis good and totally justified as something worth
(44:36):
watching. In relation to this episode, I think if you've seen this episode
and you haven't seen Strangers on aTrain, it would, as we say,
behoove you to do so. Iwanted to ask, since we're coming
to the end of the episode andthis is the end of the third season,
what has been the episode of theseason that resonated with you the most
coming back through this watch through together, the one that resonates with me the
most of all Columbos any old Portin a Storm. I mean, it
(45:01):
still stands up for me. It'sstill just the pinnacle of Colombo for me.
You made that great point about themustache twirling or like the really like
out there villains, you know,the ones that are really doing a great
job, and poor Donald Pleasants kindof gets thrust into this position as a
murderer, but he's also loving it. He can now order all the wine
(45:24):
he wants. He's just living onborrow time. Basically, I don't think
he's going to get away. Hethinks he's going to get away with any
of this stuff because at some point, those chickens are going to have to
come home to roost and he's gonnahave to start paying for all this stuff
that his brother was warning him about. But Adrian Christina was just having a
(45:45):
good time, and Donald Pleasance blowingup at those guys in the restaurant is
still one of my favorite things.How about you, Chris, what was
the best and maybe even the worstmoments of season three for you? I
think think for me, the pinnaclemoments for me are Johnny Cash being in
the show, which just like,I mean, I know that that was
(46:06):
just the last episode, so Ikind of it's a little unfair. But
I also think like Johnny Cash makessuch an impact on this show that if
you asked me, if you askme quee up four years from now or
whatever it is, if you askme at the end of this show or
whenever we finish, what episodes willstand out and what characters are gonna stand
out. I'd be surprised if Istill don't say that Johnny Cash character.
(46:27):
I know that there are gonna beplenty of fantastic villains from here until the
end of the show, but JohnnyCash is Johnny Cash's in a lot of
ways. I'll quote John Cusack fromHigh Fidelity. He's in fucking Colombo.
It's you know, it's like,who to fucking thunk it? Of all
people, Johnny Cash and Colombo.I also, I mean, obviously the
(46:49):
Donald Pleasant episode is fantastic. Ireally like how good of a villain he
is. I mean I also mentionedI think for me, I enjoyed Mind
over Mayhem a little bit more thanI think you did. So I liked
Miguel Farrer or I guess not MiguelJose. Jose, Yeah, the Emperor
of the Known Universe. He's great. There. I will say this season,
(47:09):
maybe the lacking has been the peopledying have been kind of unmemorable for
the most part, Like we've hadsome We've had some people die on this
show that are like okay, likethis is a rather well known character actor,
they give him a lot of time. I think it's indicative of how
this season is treated the people thatdie in that the first person to die
(47:30):
in this episode is already dead andit's played by an uncredited actress. So
I don't know that. For me, I feel like this season has been
about some killers that are really lighteningit up. But like Mickey Spalane was
one of the victims, and theydid like nothing with him at all.
I mean the episode, the episodethat you've talked about already with Donald pleasants
(47:50):
like his brother doesn't do shit.For the most part. He has one
antagonistic, antagonistic scene and that's it. I think for me, maybe the
best victim this season. But again, and this guy is like the whistling
idiot of them all is Martin Sheenthe first episode we watched where it's just
like, dude, the worst thingyou could do is what you did,
and you d went and did itanyways, So he's the standout victim.
But I think, yeah, thishas been a very strong season killer wise,
(48:15):
but victim wise, it's been kindof weak, and I don't think
that's necessarily always going to be thecase, but this season seems like they
definitely weren't phoning it in for thekillers. Well, yeah, I'm excited
to talk about season four with you. And before we do that, I
think we should announce a very specialepisode. On the next special episode of
The Shabby Detective, we're going totake a little bit of a break and
(48:37):
jump forward in time and we're goingto be talking about one of the great
comedies of the twenty first century.Chris, you want to say it?
Oh, it's Corky Romano baby.Fuck. Yeah, it was the film
that introduced me to Aha, Andno, I'm not kidding, and you
know exactly what I'm talking It's takeon me is in that movie in like
a pretty substantial way, right ifmemory serves. It's been a long time
(48:59):
since I've seen it, but Ijust remember it so fondly. And we
got mister Falk in there, andI'm super excited to talk about it with
you. Peter Falk playing I believePeter Berg, Chris Penn, and Chris
Katan's dad. He is the fatherto all three of these people, Which
of them is the most unbelievable.We will get to when we get to
the episode but I don't think ChrisKatan is going to be the answer.
(49:21):
I don't know what universe Chris Penncomes out of Peter Fulk, but yeah,
he's gonna need a C section,definitely. Yeah. I'm excited to
rewatch Corky Ramano. I think,like yourself, it's been decade plus.
I don't know why kind of forgotit existed, But now that we're doing
this, it feels like the perfecttime to go back to Colombo meets Chris
(49:42):
Katan in Corky Romano for whatever reason, Well, until we do that,
Chris, what are you up tothese days? Working on podcasts and all
sorts of interesting stuff over at Weirdingwaymediadot com, where the things that I
work on can be found a lotof other fantastic shows like eighty TV Ladies,
Feminine Critique, Twisted and on Corked, your Show, The Projection Booth,
all great shows that can be foundout weirding Way Media, and I
(50:05):
have effectively nothing to do with them, which means they're fantastic on their own,
which I'm super proud of. SoI just get to be proud of
everything that everybody else makes. Soweirding Way Media is where you can go
to listen to this show and somany other things. What about you,
Mike reading much the same thing.I'm not on any of those other shows
either, except for the projection booth, but yeah, we're doing great work
over there. People should come onover to weirdingwaymedia dot com and check out
(50:27):
the shows because some good stuff.Thank you so much to John Walker for
a theme song, thank you toColin Gallagher for our end theme, and
thank you to everybody for listening.Please continue to listen, go ahead,
rate and review the show wherever youget it. That would be greatly appreciated.
And until then, we will seeyou next month with some more Peter
(50:47):
Falk goodness in power, Powers,anything, No
Welcome to The Shabby Detective, yetanother Colombo podcast. I'm your host,
Mike White, and joining me,of course, is mister Christasue and I
get to do this again, sogo ahead and roast me. But this
will be the third time I makethis joke. My appearance on this show
was spared, no expense. Theybrought it, They pulled out all the
stops to have me on this episode. No expenses were spared, if you
(00:44):
know what I mean. Richard Kylie. Oh okay, that's my third time
making a Richard Kylie Jurassic Park joke, because I believe I've made it on
Night Gallery twice because he was ontwo episodes of Night Gallery. Right,
he was the Nazi at one pointand then something else. But I remember
Father Million rolled his eyes it methe last time at it's all just do
it again? Why not? Fuckit? Who cares? Man? You
(01:06):
know that movie a lot better thanI do. There are some lines for
that movie that are that occupy rentin my head, free rent free.
So yes, ah ah, that'spretty much it got Dodson here. Yeah,
it's pretty much. Any ned Relines for me, fair fair on
this episode of The Shabby Detective We'renot talking about Jurassic Park. We're talking
(01:27):
about a friend. Indeed, didthis the final the eighth episode of the
third season. Directed by Peter Falk'sgood friend Ben Gazzara and written by Peter
S. Fisher. This episode droppedOriginally May fifth, nineteen seventy four,
dropped it was nineteen seventy four.This episode aired forward over the air,
(01:53):
Yes, yes, where you hadone chance to see it, unless maybe
you were Elvis Presley and had yourown home youmatic machine where you could record
things and watch them on the theLisa Marie or whatever the plane was.
So yeah, still fucking crazy tothink about. We could just flip on
Peacock and watch episodes of Clumbo likeit's nobody's business. Like it really is
(02:15):
a time of wonder and miracles,folks that we live in. Like I
got to figure out how to turnon subtitles on there because I don't know
how to do it. This episodestars the one and only, as you
said, Richard Kylie Uh and MichaelMcGuire also, and what an unusual episode
because by the time this starts,somebody's already dead. It is Michael McGuire's
(02:43):
wife. He is Hugh Caldwell,missus Caldwell's dead, and he calls up
his old buddy Up. He's nothere, sorry, says his wife Margaret.
But our friend Mark Halpernan is overat the club, so Hugh gives
him a call over there ends upingup kind of rude to the waiter.
I think the matre d you know, just kind of walks off while he's
(03:06):
talking. But yeah, hey man, I need you to help me out.
My wife is dead. So heimmediately man Mark Helpernan is some sort
of devious motherfucker because this guy comesup with a plan to take care of
his buddy Hugh and also take careof his problem, which is his wife
(03:27):
Margaret, because she holds the pursestrings in his family. Apparently he likes
to lose quite a bit when he'sout at the club playing high stakes backgammon.
Holy cow, you're gonna need apair of devils to get me out
of that one. Look at thosetwo fives. Wow, so so over
the top. So, Chris,what did you think of a friend?
(03:51):
Indeed, it is unlike any Columboepisode we've seen up until this point in
so many ways. I mean,look, Valever is here, He's integral
to the story, and you almostforget that he's there for a good portion
of it. He's been in whatthree to this is his third appearance in
Colombo. There's a lot of stuffgoing on. I think it's a fun
(04:13):
episode. I actually have very fewproblems with it. I actually think it
makes use of its time rather welltoo. I mean it's an hour and
a half, so it's an hourthirty eight, so it's a feature length,
and for it being feature length,I didn't find it to drag a
whole lot. There's one part thatkind of drags, And again I'm just
wondering, like, who the fuckwanted to do this if it wasn't just
(04:33):
Peter Falk and Ben Gazara, whichI kind of think it was given what
we know about them and given whatwe've seen with Peter Falk just wanting to
do Peter Falk things sometimes in thisshow. But all that aside, I
mean, what a wild episode.At one point, Richard Kylie just jumps
out of a helicopter right above aswimming pool, Like that's a thing that
(04:54):
happens in this episode. That's justI don't know, it's interesting, and
you mentioned it, you know,we kind of haven't given away the other
part of the episode that's just isinsane. This is the first time that
Colombo knows the person who's the murderer, like straight up knows him. Yeah,
because that is a really good twist. Not only does he know this
(05:15):
guy, but this guy is essentiallyhis boss. It's the commissioner of the
police. Like that for me isthe is the real success of the episode
is It's not that I didn't seeit coming because I read the description of
the episode, so I knew,But it's still done so well that I
forgot that that was part of itbecause there is so much else going on.
There are enough moving pieces within it. Yeah, Peacock. Unfortunately,
(05:38):
like the episode synopsis or descriptions arepretty bold for the most part and say
exactly what's going on. But Ican imagine not knowing that twist and it
happening. Because for me, whenthat twist happens and it turns out like
he's literally Colombo's boss, oh,like that raises the stakes. I don't
think they go as far as theycould have. I think they kind of
(06:00):
introduce it and then don't do asmuch as I would have with it.
But I like that. That's aninteresting angle that this episode takes because it
makes it feel very different and alot of the episodes very different. I'm
sure we'll kind of get into it, but it's a very different episode of
Colombo in a very good way.I really like this one. I love
that it is a policeman that he'sinvestigating. I love just how wiley he
(06:25):
is, and that you know thiscriminal is really I mean he I don't
know when he comes up with allof the moves that he's about to make,
but it feels like he's had thisin his back pocket for however long.
Like, Okay, if somebody comesto me and says they want me
to cover up a murder, I'mgoing to have to have them do me
(06:45):
a solid in return and cover forme killing my wife. I kept comparing
this in my mind to strangers ona train. A little different than strangers
on a train in that there iswell, there's no agreement between Dye and
Bruno, that one that we're goingto kill each other's problems that we have.
But this whole thing of I nowhave information over you. You're gonna
(07:10):
have to do me a solid now, quite pro quo. And now you're
gonna have to help me cover upthe murder of my wife since I helped
you cover up the murder of yourwife. And just all those things where
he's like, oh, I sawsomeone across the way, and then it
gives the press conference and he makesit seem like his wife saw the quote
unquote murderer as well, and theall the journalists are like, oh did
(07:35):
your wife what did your wife see? What'd your wife see? And then
when she dies, he's like,oh, oh darn, oh damn,
my slip of the tongue. Margaretnever saw anything. The killer must have
come back and thought that she sawhim. It was like, Wow,
you're really laying it on thick here. But I love it. I love
(07:57):
this episode. Yeah, Richard Kylieis a real piece in this movie peace
being of shit And and that's thething I mean, for me, these
episodes really are working, you know, a firing on all cylinders. When
the villain is as devious and aslike able to navigate his own situation,
(08:20):
in this case, his situation aswell as Colombo can chase after them.
I like that. It's, youknow, one mouse running around and a
cat's chasing after him. But themouse has many holes to go through,
but at some point, although therewill be no more holes to run through,
and the cat's gonna get you.We see that here. I think
that the way that they handle ithere is very interesting. But to your
point, I like that the stakesare raised. I like that Richard Kylie,
(08:41):
like I wouldn't have been surprised ifhe'd gotten away with it. He
does a good enough job. Heslips up a little bit. I mean
the way he slips up is likeshockingly idiotic, in like, it's shocking
how much of an idiot this guy, who's been pretty smart for the most
part, has been I do.I love that he is able to more
or less navigate the entire situation upuntil, like the last moment he has
(09:07):
to get gotten by Colombo to becaught. He is caught in the act
by Colombo, which I like that. I like that we get all the
way to the very last moment andthen he gets caught. So yeah,
and again, Richard Kylie's just he'sup there now with some of the best,
with some of the best batties onthis show. Well, it makes
me wonder, is he the guythat Jean Barry's doctor Ray Fleming was reaching
(09:31):
out to when he's like, getthis guy off of my case because he
was friends with the commissioner. Idon't know if it's the same commissioner or
not, but I would love tothink that the commissioner is the same guy
that Richard Kylie is, the guywho said Okay, yeah, no problem,
I'll take care of Colombo and thenturns around and goes, Columbo,
something's up with this guy. Youreally need to press this investigation. I
(09:54):
would love if he I mean,he has to know how smart Colombo is,
because to your point, everything thathe's doing, all of the slip
ups are stupid little things, arelike things that other criminals could probably get
away with. This whole thing ofoh, she keeps her nightgown under the
pillow, but he took a nightgownout of the closet and put that on
her. So that doesn't make anysense for the way that this was.
(10:18):
If it was the husband, hewould have known that. So it had
to be somebody else besides the husband. And it's just like all these signs
pointing at Richard Kylie's character, it'slike okay, and yeah, everything that
he does, it's like, ohno, it shouldn't have been that.
It should have been this, youknow, Oh, the knobs were wiped
clean, so she would have leftfingerprints. The only fingerprints were there were
(10:43):
on this phone and not this otherphone. All of these little things.
And then when it comes to god, I love Columbo when he finds that
the victim, the Margaret, hasdrowned, and the way he walks into
that bathroom and just walk right inand goes right into the tub one of
the best shots for me. Ilove it. I really like the bathtub
(11:05):
payoff that it's it's ultimately I thinkthat this is the bathtub that gets Richard
Kylie more or less right. Likeat least my perception of the end of
the episode is it's it's as muchthe bathtub as it is anything else.
Because what happens when you drown someoneThey inhale water, what happens to the
water stays in the lungs? Whatdoes water in a bathtub have soap?
What does water in a pool nothave soap? So And what's funny is
(11:30):
the episode kind of leads you downthe path of like, well, there's
not gonna be anything there, that'swhat you think, because they say like
the chlorine more or less disappears,but no, like the soap is there,
So that's the indicator. I mean, what's funny is we say that
Richard Kylie's smart, But I wouldwonder because you kind of brought it up
and maybe I don't know, youcan kind of have this discussion, but
(11:50):
is he smart or is he thebiggest fucking idiot that we've met because he
literally knows what Colombo's deal is.Like you said, I would actually be
curious listeners, because I know you'relistening. Please let us know how many
times those of you who watch theshow all the time, which I know
that there are plenty of you aswell, up until this point, up
to the end of season three,how many times has the commissioner been mentioned?
(12:13):
Because now we know who that is, at least one of them.
Possibly, I don't are there morethan one commissioner. He's the deputy commissioner
right well, And there's also youknow, it's been quite a few years
since Colombo put that crafty psychiatrist behindbars, so we also don't know like
the chronological time of Columbo, likeis this all taking place and like,
(12:35):
oh, he just busts these guysevery other day, like how much time
is in between it. But that'swhy I wonder, like, or is
he just a massive moron who knowsColumbo's gonna come investigate and knows that Colombo
is this like powerhouse of a detectiveand he does this anyways, like you've
done the thing that you're putting peoplein jail for, okay, and now
you're going to jail because you wenttoe to toe with Colombo. Well,
(12:58):
I'd love the other parts of thisbecause this whole episode is just setting stuff
up and knocking it down, settingit up and knocking it down. This
whole thing of Kylie pretends that he'sa thief that has been hitting all of
these these upper Lachelon mansions. He'sgoing around, and so he just goes
(13:18):
through his friend's wives a jewelry boxand takes all this jewelry, leaves the
ring on her finger. That wasa stupid thing. But then when the
one guy's just like, oh yeah, no, it's a big old hunk
of glass, and then he realized, oh shit, all of her jewelry
is completely useless. It's a figIf he really was the thief, he
(13:43):
wouldn't have stole any of that stuff. He would have realized that it was
all glass and it was all justcompletely complete garbage. I mean I love
that kind of stuff. And theway, you know, you mentioned val
Avery and how yeah you kind offorget that he's there. But I think
they did a good job of likeshowing Kylie on TV and then you cut
to the bar and there's Val Averyand he's making it kind of a scene
(14:05):
with his girlfriend, his squeeze whatevershe is. She wishes she was my
wife. Yeah, boy, yeah, I really wish I was married to
you. The guy who spends moretime in the jug than than out of
it. Yeah, I mean he'sin the bar every time we see him
for the most part. Yeah yeah. The only time we don't see him
is when he's at his apartment.Oh wait, that's not his apartment.
(14:28):
Talk about one of the best twists. I love this. This twist is
up there with suitable for framing forme. When it's like, no,
sir, this is my apartment.I signed the least this morning. Oh
that's the moment of like, that'sthe moment where the shit hits the fan
and it's like two minutes more.The end of the episode, it's it's
(14:50):
great. Like the way Columbo catchesRichard Kylie in this episode is pretty good.
And and the fake outs are area lot. There are a fair
amount of them in this episode.Like we mentioned with the chlorine, like
we mentioned with the diamond ring,like or I guess the glass ring,
the cubics of coranium even maybe likethose things are fake outs, but they're
they're executed all the way to theend, like they go all the way
(15:13):
with them. They don't pull anypunches. It's not like, oh,
well, we'll mention this thing andthen not mention it again. Not only
they mention it, then we havethe scene of Colombo going and investigating it.
Yeah, and I don't need thatevery time, but I appreciate it
when they do it, and theydid it really well here. Yeah,
the whole thing with him going tothe use car salesman, I like that,
and pretty much is just like thereis a lot going on in this
(15:35):
episode, Jesus. I mean,yeah, you're right ninety four minutes and
for me, I'm curious what yourtake is on this. For me,
nothing's wasted. But what was thescene that was getting to you? It's
after he goes and meets Richard Kylie'swife. And then it's just like him
aimlessly wandering around in his car fora while, and we like watch him
in the neighborhood and they like stopsin his car. It's it's the gag
(15:58):
of getting his car to break downagain. It's like, I don't know,
why is this what I thought itwas so he could like see if
he could see or if he couldgo in the house fast enough. And
that did actually be the case thatthe woman that the wife of Richard Kylee
wouldn't see, but it wasn't that. It ended up being just a gag
to get his car to break downagain, which worked really well. At
(16:19):
the opening of the episode that forme is one of these like iconic now
for me Columbo moments of him.I couldn't figure out what the fuck he
was doing, even when the doorwas open, and it's like, oh,
I lost my cigar. And thenhe's like, and this is the
commissioner's car. It's like, Wow, it answered the question I was wondering.
The moment he answered he says like, this is the commissioner's car is
like, oh, he does knowColombo, Okay, because that's the question
(16:41):
you have immediately when it's a copit's like, does Colombo know them?
Is Colombo where that they exist?And like yes, And I think for
me, that's the other really smartchoice of the episode is making it someone
that at least knows who Colombo isby first name, at least we don't
have the opportunity to read the scriptsfor every Colombo like we did for Colchak.
(17:03):
We read retty much everything, butwith Colombo, it's like, yeah,
once you get to like season eight, so you get a couple season
ten, you get three episodes.Season three, there's one script that I
have available to me, and thatis a friend, Indeed's script. So
it was great to be able tocompare this. But I have to say
(17:25):
they followed Peter Fisher's script so exactly. They did a really good job.
The only thing that I noticed thatwas different was there was a line about
somebody get Colombo, and they said, oh, we had to send a
car for him, so there's moreabout the car stuff in there, and
then the car pulls up and thenhe gets out and does that. I
(17:48):
think it worked better with the waythat they shot it, where we just
are introduced to Colombo. What sixteenminutes in before the second murder even takes
place. I mean we've been talkinga lot. I mean the entire time
we've done Chabby Detective. When doesColombo come in? What does he know
at that time? We've seen himcome in before a murder has taken place,
(18:11):
like the any important storm. Heis there and the woman comes in,
who's the boy? The girlfriend ofthe brother, and so he is
tipped off to this stuff before heever gets the call to go out to
the vineyard and find out this stuff. So, yeah, we've had him
introduced before, like there's a deadbody, though I think the body is
(18:33):
probably dead by that time. Butyeah, this was the first time where
we have him coming out here.First time we have a body already on
the scene. First time he's goingagainst one of his own, a fellow
police officer. Yeah. I reallylike how they are playing with the form
in this, and this really givesme hope as far as okay, you
(18:55):
can do a lot of different thingswith Columba, because a few times this
season it's like, Okay, thenthis is gonna happen. Then this is
gonna happen, Then this is gonnahappen. It's always fun watching how Faulk
plays it. But this really playedwith the form for me, and that's
why I also really enjoyed the episodebecause there there's some interesting things going on
that are a typical of the showwe've seen up until this point. Also
(19:18):
mention to me, Michael maguire iskind of sympathetic as a character. Oh
yeah, which is interesting. Imean Richard Kyle's Halprinan is not. I
mean, this guy is like,he's it seems like he's looking I mean,
like you mentioned, he's looking fora reason to kill his wife,
clearly, but I also think he'sjust looking for a reason to kill somebody
because to be fair, like awfullycomfortable around dead bodies too. Like the
(19:40):
question I have is how did thisguy become Commissioner of Race? Like,
holy shit, the moral compass onthis guy to say it's pointing in the
wrong direction is to undersell it.It's pointing in the wrong direction, and
he's following it with glee because theyeah, like you mentioned already, the
the the speed and efficiency which withwhich he is able to create the idea
(20:02):
of we're going to frame this guyand you're gonna be fine. And then
not only that, but I'm gonnaquid pro quoet and you're gonna help me
when I kill my wife. Yeah, Like this is he's probably the worst
character we've gotten on this show sofar because on top of everything else,
he doesn't even kill anybody until thesecond act of the episode, but all
the terrible stuff that he's doing,like it it justifies and explains why he's
(20:26):
going to kill his wife. Oh, because he's just a bastard like through
and through. Oh yeah, well, at least with Michael McGuire, his
character kills out of passion. Youknow he's having any arguments. Yeah,
squeezes her neck too hard. Imean, yeah, he's a murderer.
I'm not trying to say like it'sexcusable, but it is very much crime
(20:47):
of passion, whereas what Kylie isdoing is so premeditated, Like that is
the definition of premeditation. It iswild. It's like comparing Jeffrey Tomer and
like a jilted lover, right,Like one of these people is just sitting
there just like enjoying it, andthe other person probably would never kill somebody
(21:07):
else if they were given an opportunity. Again, like it's crimes of passion.
Exist in that moment of uncontrollable emotion, right, and we don't really
see it in the episode. Soagain we just have to take the Michael
McGuire character at as his word.But I like the idea of a sympathetic
villain in this show because that's thereality. Like these kind of things do
(21:30):
happen, Like people die every day, and sometimes they die in crimes of
passion. There are even laws andrules against it in terms of crimes of
passion, how they're persecuted, howthey're prosecuted, how they're defended, how
the people go to jail for it, so it's an understood thing in the
criminal justice system. I like thatthis episode is like, Okay, it's
not him that's the problem. Somuch like in a lot of ways,
(21:51):
I wonder if Richard Kylie had said, like the best thing for you to
do is just go admit it andmove on. I think this guy would
have. I think Michael McGuire wouldhave. But again, like you mentioned,
like Richard Kylie's just mister burns inwaiting for somebody, somebody that he
knows to kill somebody, like tintinghis fingers and waiting. That's what it
feels like and I mean that isthe case, but that's why he's such
(22:11):
a good villain. I think thevillains in this show that I really resonated
with are the ones that are justlike bastards through and through because they're having
the best time. Like, yes, Johnny Cash is great, he's pretty
sympathetic, but Robert Cope, RichardKylie like Cheese, these dusers, and
I mean in a lot of ways, maybe not playing it at the same
level, but like a Donald pleasanceas well, is like enjoying the fact
(22:33):
that he did this because he's gainingsomething from it. This is really a
great entry into the show. Youmentioned val Avery, and I do like
that he has. This is asubstantial role. He's not just renting a
boat to Suzanne Pluchette. But theother person who's in here is our good
friend Arlene Martel. She's back again, and this time she's actually on screen,
(22:56):
because the last time she was supposedto be around was I think the
double Exposure episode, the Subliminal Messageone where she plays Tanya Baker and she's
only talked about and never actually seen. But here we get to see her
one more time, and that's whenColombo. I can't even remember why he
(23:18):
goes, Oh he's going in totalk about the jewelry stuff. And while
he's there, while he's at thejewelers, Uh, yeah, I need
a new band for this watch,right, it's a really good watch.
You know, I've had this fora few years, you know. Oh
yeah, that'll be twenty five dollars. No, no, I don't need
the new the watch. I justneed the bath. I love Colombo so
(23:41):
much as just a character like hehe really is like one of the like
Semino pop culture detectives as far asI'm concerned, Like he's just it's pretty
much just Peter Folk, which Ithink anybody who watches this show and loves
it like you do, and I'mI'm coming to and I obviously have a
lot and enjoyed what we've wanted.Like it's so much just him that like
(24:03):
not that they don't make him likethis anymore, but like people aren't doing
this thing anymore the way that PeterFalk was where it's like I'm gonna work
on this show and I'm not evensure I like it, but I'm going
to give it everything that I have. Like we know and have heard of
through plenty of news, you know, entertainment news things. How many shows
die because nobody's committed to it.And we know that Peter Faulk in a
lot of ways was his commitment tothe show varied. But I don't think
(24:26):
he ever phones it in, evenwhen I think, even when I think
he might be wanting to, Like, he's just so goddamn good in this
show. And I know we sayit like every episode and it shouldn't come
as a surprise anymore. But everytime I watch a new episode with him,
I'm like, and he just givesyou something else, some other little
thing different. Yeah, he's he'sgreat. I excuse me, man,
(24:48):
I didn't mean to scare you,Like, oh Jesus Christ can't take this
guy anywhere. And I'm wondering,I have a question for you. Are
those pictures at the end just picturesthat he found somewhere and he's passing off
as his niece and nephew because likeagain, like so, is Columbo just
renting the apartment just to rent it? Or is he kicked or does he
just live in his car and hehas no family? Like just making it
(25:12):
all up. Yeah, I feellike he has been this whole time,
and this episode where he is kindof screams to me like divorce dad energy,
like he's he's like, you know, like he underwear, he moved
in his his T shirts, hemoved in everything. Yeah those yeah,
(25:32):
yeah yeah, Rachel Blade Runner.Yeah, he's just like, oh,
this is my backstory, yeah,because you created it that way. I
always wonder, like, I mean, is Colombo for real? I never
know, But the point is youdon't know, which is how he's able
to navigate around these criminals. Sodefintely is they have no idea what to
make of him, except for RichardKylie, who should have known better,
(25:55):
like of all the people man,So I'm saying, like, this guy's
a big dummy. He's smart,but he is ultimately like the biggest dummy
we've seen. Oh yeah, heshould have been Like, well, I
need Ricky Brockman to come in hereand he can do this whole murder investigation.
Keep Columbo the fuck away from me, Like I'm gonna go kill my
wife and like San Luis Obisbo orsomething or like in the middle of Bakersfield,
(26:18):
just so I don't have to haveColombo come out and deal with it.
It'll be the local cops, notthe LAPD. Yeah, the old
James l Roy Special. Yeah,I get the Sheriff's department exactly. Yeah,
I don't cat the cops get theSheriff's department. But that's but that's
the thing, Like, like we'vesaid, like with Colombo being just the
powerhouse of a character that he is, it's hard for me to believe that
the police commissioner wouldn't know what hisdeal is. But yeah, I love
(26:44):
how I love how dastardly he is, and I love how much Peter Falk
in this episode specifically, I don'tfeel like I could. I don't feel
like I know immediately when he showsup that he knows. I think it
takes him quite some time in thisepisode to get to the point where he
has quit it to other more orless. Yeah, I'm trying to think
of what the first clue is thathe might see. I mean, it
(27:06):
could be the nightgown under the pillow. I think the door handle is the
first thing. I think He's like, why are these handles? Like didn't
you like dust these handles? Andthey were like nothing. It's little things
that just keep adding up and addingup. And I love to the whole
thing where he's like, I can'tfill in this report. Yeah, I'm
still working on it. There's afew things because I think I was doing
(27:27):
that and saying that it's the captainwho's on his ass, you know,
and it's like, oh, Igot a just a few more questions.
You know, you got to fillin all these things for his report.
This time it's like, ah,sorry, Commissioner, I can't get you
this report. I'm still working.It's still a few things just not adding
up for me. I love it, yah know. He's Columbo's great in
(27:49):
this episode. I mean, Ithink Richard Kylie's great too. And I
also really like I mean again,I like the idea of having a third
party, the val Avery character whohas his own autonomy and machinations here because
he's just as our friends in BarneyMiller know, he's just a thief.
He ain't no murderer, which theysee plenty of in Barney Miller. Like
(28:10):
most of the time, the peoplethat are being booked in the twelfth are
just common criminals or people who haveproblems with grammar, and here it feels
that same way where it's like,okay, like normally Colombo is brought into
these things, and he's brought intoit, so there's a person you can
point at and be like, thisis the person here. I don't think
(28:30):
he knows it's Richard Kylee for quitesome time, like at least the halfway
through the episode. Could see that. I could see that. I tend
to give Colombo the benefit of thedoubt and think that he knows immediately.
But I can see your point.I could see him not actually being able
to add it all up until Imean it's still pretty early in the affair,
(28:51):
but yeah, until that beginning ofthe second act. Well, and
again it's some of that like justtoo close to be able to tell,
right because he's in the police,Like this guy's the police, can I
mean, once it comes to thesecond murder and there's that whole like,
oh, you saw him out ofthe uh from the helicopter and you knew
that, oh okay, right hidingbehind the car. It's a very interesting
(29:14):
episode because again having a val averycharacter that has his own autonomy. There
hasn't been a character like that yetwho's like I didn't kill anybody, Yeah,
like I didn't kill a single personand they're trying to pin this on
me, like, no fucking way. I mean again, going to prison
for murder is very different than beinga common burglar. So I like that
there's like an added steak and addedcomplexity to all of this. We've talked
(29:37):
so many times before about Colombo whenhe knows somebody's innocent, like talking to
the ant in the Suitable for Framingepisode Kim Hunter, and he's just like,
yeah, no, she didn't doit. And of course you know
that that drives Ross Martin fucking crazy. What are you talking about now?
Of course she did with this one. You know, it's like he talks
to the guy from the used carlot who wants to eighty dollars for his
(30:00):
car, which makes me laugh quitea bit. Yeah, no, that's
okay. I don't need to comein and see this other girl that you
hooked up with when the wife ofthe guy was busy. That's fine.
I know you're all set. Samething with al Avery, he's just like,
no, I don't think you're amurderer. He just flat out no,
no, I know you didn't dothis. And then he's able to
(30:22):
win the trust over because he hasto have val Avery go along with him
on this stuff. He has tobe part of this dupe to get the
commissioner up to the apartment and allthis stuff. And I just love that.
I love how Colombo has one filemade up and just puts that fake
address in there and he's like,you only two people that ever saw were
(30:45):
me and you, and you cameover here and you planted this evidence.
This is my apartment. I lovethat. So my question is, did
when Colombo gives the information and let'shelp enunciate it, he knows or is
that the final piece of confirmation thathe needs. I mean, I think
he knows, but yeah, that'sthat's the way that he's going to get
him. The Michael Maguire character,I feel like he could be swayed into
(31:08):
admitting what he did. Richard Kyliehas to be caught, like that's how
that's how malignant of a shithead heis. He's like he has He's like
Ross Martin. He has to becaught in the act. And it's like,
that's the only way this is gonnahappen, because this guy is going
It's like in Strangers on a Trainwhere Bruno refuses to say anything up until
(31:29):
I don't know what you're talking about, and then his body involuntary lets us
know, oh, by the way, he's he was in on it,
and nothing this guy was saying wasa liah was all the truth. I
like that similarly here, like RichardKylie up until the moment where it's like,
there's nothing else to prove here,you can't do anything about this.
You have made it so and thatis what it is. I love that.
(31:49):
I do like that that kind offormula of this show that they've done
a couple times, which is notletting Columbo have this twenty minute setup thing
like this is all just like boomboom boom boom boom, episode's done,
Like I think of the Miguel Farrarepisode like two episodes ago, like that,
the end of the episode takes liketwenty minutes because they're like, well,
he did it, and we're gonnatake the sun out and then we're
(32:12):
gonna give him time to wait andthen we're gonna book him. Here.
It's just like nope, we gotthis and this and this and that's it.
We got him, and he's justgonna admit it again. I don't
know why he would admit it.Like I feel like you're the police officer.
Like the first thing you do islawyer the fuck up. And that's
the thing. Like, this isone of the few cases where'm like comb
Columbo's kind of foils in this episode. I think Richard Kylie could still get
away with it realistically, Like Idon't. I don't think any jury is
(32:36):
going to prosecute him easily. Alot of circumstantial evidence. I wouldn't be
surprised if they got Michael McGuire toturn on him, to turn state's evidence.
Yeah, that's I mean, that'swhat I was thinking. I mean,
that's the way I saw this playingout after like the two minutes or
the two months after the episode.Is Michael McGuire's character is is kind of
(32:57):
coerced or more or less feels guiltyenough to admit it. But yeah,
like it's funny because like I'm notsaying, there's not a lot to pin
it on Richard Kylie, but it'skind of just one thing. It's the
one thing of he went to theaddress because again can't prove he has no
proof that he murdered his wife.The wife is dead, but he it's
not like there's handprints or anything else. The only proof that she didn't die
(33:19):
in the bath in the school isthe bathtub. Yeah, but there is
the evidence that he planted there,so that's a little bit more less than
circumstantial. But yeah, I knowwhat you're saying. And yeah, I
could see them being like, hey, Michael McGuire, uh, we know
you killed your wife, But thepunishment doesn't have to be going over to
(33:40):
like you know, sing sing orany of these types of places. You
could go to like the club,med prison and spend your time there.
Yeah, if you turn stool pigeon, Yeah, it seems like a good
deal to me. Yeah. Andthat's the thing. What's interesting about these
two people murder episodes is they haven'treally mined this dynamic the way that this
(34:01):
episode did. And I think thatthis is the most interesting way to do
it because similar I mean similarly toStrangers on the Train, but also very
different. Like you mentioned, thereasoning and the autonomy of each character is
very different in each of the pieces. I prefer it here. I prefer
it here only because they don't feelI'm not saying there, and I don't
(34:22):
think the characters are flat and strangerson a train, But Strangers on a
Train's tension kind of plateause at somepoint, and this just keeps going and
going and going because we as theaudience are in on it in both of
these cases. But in Strangers ona Train, I just I think that
there's in terms of the tension buildingand the interesting interactions, I think this
(34:43):
does it a little bit better.If we're talking about this kind of scenario
of two people killing two ostensibly randompeople. Guy is the typical Hitchcock wrong
man, and he has to provethat he's not the wrong man or that
he is the wrong man, andhe has to go out there and like
he becomes the investigator. He's gettinghis fiancee involved in He's getting is what
(35:07):
is his sister the Patricia Hitchcock characterinvolved in it or sister in law,
like getting all of these parties involvedin trying to prove himself innocent, as
opposed to having this dadlike investigator whocan come in and just be like no,
no, sorting it all out.Which I appreciate that, but I'm
curious how you liked Strangers on aTrain. So it's like, I think
(35:30):
the second Hitchcock movie I've seen,I got no problem admitting that he's just
one of the few directors I havenot made time for. I enjoyed it.
I think it was pretty good.I think it was pretty good,
and I think it was also interestingto compare and contrast it against this and
that. And then there's what's funnyis there's an episode of Tales from the
Crypt that is very similar to bothof these things. That it's again,
(35:52):
you know, the whole third actof it takes place on a train and
there's some intrigue as to who killedwhom and how as the person who died
who killed them and wine all that. So I enjoyed it. I mean,
again, it's definitely within my wheelhouseof the kinds of things that I
like, and how the performances werefantastic. Yeah, I'm glad that you
liked it. And I really likedthat one. I especially like the Patricia
(36:15):
Hitchcock character and how she becomes thestand in for the Teresa character because she's
got the same types of glasses.The use of the glasses I thought was
really nice, especially the murder beingreflected in them. I mean, it's
not as as cool as Robert Culp'sglasses in Colombo, but you know,
it was definitely pretty nice. Andyeah, when he sees Patricia Hitchcock and
(36:38):
then you get the flame in herglasses, I thought that was really nice
too. I was about to say, like that that whole picture in the
glasses thing. They've done that onthis show. Oh yeah, yeah,
Culpin Death lends a hand. Yeah, and then I think we also saw
it on What Night Gallery where theydid that with I think, so yeah,
yeah, I like, I mean, I like it. I think
(37:00):
that it's an interesting stylistic choice.And what's even more impressive is that it's
done physically, Like this is nota digital This is not a digital thing
by any stretch of the imagination.So it makes me even more impressed because
I'm like, oh, okay,so you actually had to do this and
double expose it and all that,Like yeah, that's Hitchcock has an eye
for the thematic for sure, Likehe knows, he knows just how to
(37:23):
set and light things. He's themaster of suspense for reason. Oh yeah,
Well, and then you get allthose great double entendres and just that
weird sexual attraction that Bruno has toguy and this guy giving it back,
is he not? I mean,just yeah, all of that, and
that it was based on the highSmith, and she's got homosexual characters like
(37:47):
crazy in her books. And soI'm not sure. I've never read Strangers
on the Train, but I wouldnot be surprised if Hitchcock even pumped that
up a little bit more just tryingto fuck with the censors. Yeah,
I mean I was reading about thehomo eroticism of it and all of that,
and it's there. I don't thinkit's like, I don't think it
beats you over the head with him, but it's it's there enough. Right.
(38:10):
Robert Walker, the father of RobertWalker Junior, who we just saw
in The Mind Over Mayhem, niceright, right right, I can totally
see when I think about their faces, I'm like, oh, I can
totally see that, especially run theeyes right. Yeah. I you know,
I'm glad I watched Strangers on aTrain. What's funny is I I
(38:34):
watched truly, madly, deeply,and in that movie they talk about Strangers
on a Train, And I recordedan episode of that today, and we're
recording this today, and it's likeweird synchronicity for anybody that's interested. The
episode of Tales from the Crypt thatis a oh. It even says it's
an homage to Strangers on a Train. It's the sixth episode of the fifth
(38:54):
season, so comes pretty late inthe show, and it's two for the
show, and David Paymer plays theGuy Haynes character and Vincent Spano plays the
Bruno character, and then David Pamer'swife is played by Tracy Lords of all
people. So but it's very muchlike a straight like homage to that,
(39:14):
which is also then you know thisis I think this is an homage to
that, right, Like it's not. It's not a coincidence that this is
the way that it is. Imean I was sitting there thinking strangers on
a train, and Andrey actually was, oh, this is like strangers on
a train, Like okay, good. And then of course we saw Farley
Granger. He was that satanic figurethat caused back pain in the Tales from
(39:38):
the Dark Side episode. Remember that. Oh yeah, yeah, he's great.
I mean, you know, thesetup of strangers on a train being
so iconic. I mean, look, the idea of you get on a
train and this person who's been followingyou asks you to murder someone that they
know. It's a great setup.It's a really good setup for a movie
like and that's and it's also agreat setup for form TV show or a
(40:01):
feature length movie in this film's case, or feature length episode in this episode's
case. Would be really good isif you get Billy Crystal and Danny DeVito
to kill Ann Ramsey. That wouldbe hilarious and make that Strangers on a
train? Is that a thing?Yeah, let's throw Mama from the Train.
(40:21):
Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh wow, Okay, I
mean never see I've never seen it. Is it worth watching? No,
No, it's not. Yeah,didn't sound like it. No, I
mean Danny DeVito plays kind of ahe's no Bruno because Bruno's so debonair,
Yeah, and just kind of getsgets around and all this. Let's say
(40:45):
Danny DeVito is developmentally delayed in ThrowMama from the Train. Yeah, yeah,
good times. Robert Walker's great inthe movie. Like he the way
that he plays Bruno is so specificin a way that like I'm impressed that
that's the choice that they made becauseit's a hell of a choice, and
(41:05):
I think it's a really good one, which is he's not mustache twirling,
like he's just there that scene ofguy playing tennis and all the heads are
moving back and forth, but Bruno'sjust staring at guy that whole time.
Yeah, all the heads are moving, but his being still makes it even
Repierre well. And also when hegoes to the father's house to tell him
(41:27):
and he turns the light on himthere, he's just sitting there because he
knows, because he knew he wasgetting double crossed. He is that guy.
Yeah, he's so good. Iloved the movie. It was fantastic,
and yeah, primarily because of theirperformances, Like I haven't seen enough
Hitchcock, which is clearly the case, and it's kind of depressing. Robert
Walker died like two years after Strangerson a Train came out, Like what
(41:50):
a what a shame? What anactual what an actual shame? Because that
that, for me, I thinkis the thing that I was surprised by
is again having not seen a lotof Hitchcock movie. Some of these actors
I've seen in other things, butlike Hitchcock gets the best out of everybody,
Like it's I mean, he soundedlike a pretty pain in the ass
as a director in terms of likeTarantino type, like I'm no phones on
(42:13):
set, we're doing the thing.But I can kind of respect that,
Like, we're doing the fucking thing. So we're doing the fucking thing,
and that's what we're here to do. And look, I mean the performances
he get out of he gets outof these actors are widely considered to be
their best performances in this move andStrangers on a Train. So I think
that speaks volumes to the ability ofHitchcock as a director, regardless of the
problems he had as a person andthe way he handled himself. No,
(42:36):
he was a real piece of shitin real life, but I love his
work. I mean he's kind oflike Polinski, Like I love Polanski's movies.
Guy was an asshole or is anasshole in real life. But yeah,
if you don't mind me being yourHitchcock some somalier, allow me to
recommend Rope where you get another reallygood performance from Farley Granger, but you
also get John John Dall and thenJimmy Stewart is a fantastic guice. Yeah,
(43:04):
yeah, will you be my Shirpaup the mountain of Hitchcock? Is
I will? I would be morethan happy to. I believe I'm watching
torn curtain here in the next coupleof weeks, which is as a that's
a Hitchcock one, right, it'sa Hitchcock one. But it's let's see
it less our Hitchcock and Julie Andrewsand Paul Newman. I mean, I
mean, can't be that bad,right, que me a month from now?
(43:27):
It was in fact that bad.That's the thing I mean. I
don't know much. I mean,I have never spent time looking at Hitchcock's
movies. And the only thing Isaid, like I said, I only
thing I know about him is hetreated the women on his sets pretty poorly.
So that's all I know. Andother than the fact that his movies
are widely considered to be some ofthe greatest films ever made in terms of
the genre he was making them in. But yeah, I I have not
(43:52):
seen enough. And Rope I knowis the Rope is definitely on that list,
because that's isn't that the case ofthe fucking ven Zetti BENZEDI another guy?
Right? It's not Socco and Venzetti, It's more Leopolden lob Leopolden low.
Okay, Yeah, getting my murderersconfused. Soako and Venzetti were anarchists,
I believe, right, yeah,and Leopold and Loeb were the thrill
(44:14):
killers as seen in the film Compulsion. I believe with another huge talent Orson
Wells was their lawyer in that movie, and I want to say it was
teen Stockwell and I can't remember whothe other guy was. I'll watch any
and all Hitchcock at this point because, like I said, I haven't seen
enough. But yeah, this movieis good and totally justified as something worth
(44:36):
watching. In relation to this episode, I think if you've seen this episode
and you haven't seen Strangers on aTrain, it would, as we say,
behoove you to do so. Iwanted to ask, since we're coming
to the end of the episode andthis is the end of the third season,
what has been the episode of theseason that resonated with you the most
coming back through this watch through together, the one that resonates with me the
most of all Columbos any old Portin a Storm. I mean, it
(45:01):
still stands up for me. It'sstill just the pinnacle of Colombo for me.
You made that great point about themustache twirling or like the really like
out there villains, you know,the ones that are really doing a great
job, and poor Donald Pleasants kindof gets thrust into this position as a
murderer, but he's also loving it. He can now order all the wine
(45:24):
he wants. He's just living onborrow time. Basically, I don't think
he's going to get away. Hethinks he's going to get away with any
of this stuff because at some point, those chickens are going to have to
come home to roost and he's gonnahave to start paying for all this stuff
that his brother was warning him about. But Adrian Christina was just having a
(45:45):
good time, and Donald Pleasance blowingup at those guys in the restaurant is
still one of my favorite things.How about you, Chris, what was
the best and maybe even the worstmoments of season three for you? I
think think for me, the pinnaclemoments for me are Johnny Cash being in
the show, which just like,I mean, I know that that was
(46:06):
just the last episode, so Ikind of it's a little unfair. But
I also think like Johnny Cash makessuch an impact on this show that if
you asked me, if you askme quee up four years from now or
whatever it is, if you askme at the end of this show or
whenever we finish, what episodes willstand out and what characters are gonna stand
out. I'd be surprised if Istill don't say that Johnny Cash character.
(46:27):
I know that there are gonna beplenty of fantastic villains from here until the
end of the show, but JohnnyCash is Johnny Cash's in a lot of
ways. I'll quote John Cusack fromHigh Fidelity. He's in fucking Colombo.
It's you know, it's like,who to fucking thunk it? Of all
people, Johnny Cash and Colombo.I also, I mean, obviously the
(46:49):
Donald Pleasant episode is fantastic. Ireally like how good of a villain he
is. I mean I also mentionedI think for me, I enjoyed Mind
over Mayhem a little bit more thanI think you did. So I liked
Miguel Farrer or I guess not MiguelJose. Jose, Yeah, the Emperor
of the Known Universe. He's great. There. I will say this season,
(47:09):
maybe the lacking has been the peopledying have been kind of unmemorable for
the most part, Like we've hadsome We've had some people die on this
show that are like okay, likethis is a rather well known character actor,
they give him a lot of time. I think it's indicative of how
this season is treated the people thatdie in that the first person to die
(47:30):
in this episode is already dead andit's played by an uncredited actress. So
I don't know that. For me, I feel like this season has been
about some killers that are really lighteningit up. But like Mickey Spalane was
one of the victims, and theydid like nothing with him at all.
I mean the episode, the episodethat you've talked about already with Donald pleasants
(47:50):
like his brother doesn't do shit.For the most part. He has one
antagonistic, antagonistic scene and that's it. I think for me, maybe the
best victim this season. But again, and this guy is like the whistling
idiot of them all is Martin Sheenthe first episode we watched where it's just
like, dude, the worst thingyou could do is what you did,
and you d went and did itanyways, So he's the standout victim.
But I think, yeah, thishas been a very strong season killer wise,
(48:15):
but victim wise, it's been kindof weak, and I don't think
that's necessarily always going to be thecase, but this season seems like they
definitely weren't phoning it in for thekillers. Well, yeah, I'm excited
to talk about season four with you. And before we do that, I
think we should announce a very specialepisode. On the next special episode of
The Shabby Detective, we're going totake a little bit of a break and
(48:37):
jump forward in time and we're goingto be talking about one of the great
comedies of the twenty first century.Chris, you want to say it?
Oh, it's Corky Romano baby.Fuck. Yeah, it was the film
that introduced me to Aha, Andno, I'm not kidding, and you
know exactly what I'm talking It's takeon me is in that movie in like
a pretty substantial way, right ifmemory serves. It's been a long time
(48:59):
since I've seen it, but Ijust remember it so fondly. And we
got mister Falk in there, andI'm super excited to talk about it with
you. Peter Falk playing I believePeter Berg, Chris Penn, and Chris
Katan's dad. He is the fatherto all three of these people, Which
of them is the most unbelievable.We will get to when we get to
the episode but I don't think ChrisKatan is going to be the answer.
(49:21):
I don't know what universe Chris Penncomes out of Peter Fulk, but yeah,
he's gonna need a C section,definitely. Yeah. I'm excited to
rewatch Corky Ramano. I think,like yourself, it's been decade plus.
I don't know why kind of forgotit existed, But now that we're doing
this, it feels like the perfecttime to go back to Colombo meets Chris
(49:42):
Katan in Corky Romano for whatever reason, Well, until we do that,
Chris, what are you up tothese days? Working on podcasts and all
sorts of interesting stuff over at Weirdingwaymediadot com, where the things that I
work on can be found a lotof other fantastic shows like eighty TV Ladies,
Feminine Critique, Twisted and on Corked, your Show, The Projection Booth,
all great shows that can be foundout weirding Way Media, and I
(50:05):
have effectively nothing to do with them, which means they're fantastic on their own,
which I'm super proud of. SoI just get to be proud of
everything that everybody else makes. Soweirding Way Media is where you can go
to listen to this show and somany other things. What about you,
Mike reading much the same thing.I'm not on any of those other shows
either, except for the projection booth, but yeah, we're doing great work
over there. People should come onover to weirdingwaymedia dot com and check out
(50:27):
the shows because some good stuff.Thank you so much to John Walker for
a theme song, thank you toColin Gallagher for our end theme, and
thank you to everybody for listening.Please continue to listen, go ahead,
rate and review the show wherever youget it. That would be greatly appreciated.
And until then, we will seeyou next month with some more Peter
(50:47):
Falk goodness in power, Powers,anything, No
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