Brian Head Welch of Korn Shares His JOURNEY to Faith and Redemption

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
What if the loudest rebellion you've ever heard was actually a love song?

(00:04):
In today's episode our host Tim Bisagno sits down with a man who turned heavy metal chaos into an anthem of radical grace
Brian “Head" Welch of the band Korn. so picture this you’re a guitar virtuoso, your ranked among metal's greatest shredders
You walk away from all that fame at its dizzying peak to chase something deeper

(00:25):
The same man who convinced Fred Durst to accidentally tattoo the word “Horn" on his back instead of Korn now stands as one of Christ's most vocal warriors
But this isn't your typical prodigal son story today Brian's back with Korn, not despite his faith, but because of it
He's a father who fought through addiction to love his daughter fiercely

(00:45):
A rock star who has weathered church hurt yet keeps showing up. a rebel who's learned that sometimes the loudest statement you can make
Is quiet surrender
This is a story about the tension every man faces. How do you balance?
Mosh pit intensity with Christ-like mercy. How do you stay faithful when believers betray you?

(01:06):
How do you keep pursuing your relationship with God in a world
screaming for you to sit down
Brian's here to show us what happens when heavy metal meets heavy grace
This is a Stand Up Dude podcast
Brian that was a lot

(01:31):
That was a whole lot of stuff
Does that ever when you hear that kind of bio somebody telling you about all the things that the guys done in you with you and
Accomplished and things is it ever feel like that is
Something being read about somebody else does this sound familiar when you read when you hear it. It's just like

(01:55):
It's just like my normal. I don't want to take it for granted or anything
But it's just like it's been you know 30 years since we got signed and then went out and did all that but I'm like
extremely grateful. Yeah, when I especially when I hear like when it goes to

(02:16):
The New York Times best something author and all that and like you know, so I was the I was
The worst student not the worst. I was a mediocre student season D's
Okay, and I didn't I hated school so like
having that author name on my life is like strange. Oh, interesting. It's a miracle. It's God

(02:37):
But like yeah, I'm very grateful for he's taking me and and you know my story before we'll get into it but like
the Grammys and doing all that the musical
Heights, you know
That was complete all meaningless and emptiness when I didn't have Christ and like you know when I when I just wanted to end it all

(02:59):
It's just because I because they were idols. They were like I
That was my everything and then and then it gave me what and an idol supposed to do nothingness and then Christ saved me
And then I'd be now I'm grateful for it. I would know that it's not my idol, you know, yeah
Very very good. I could I could I was since then when I was thinking about to this morning as when you'd be here in that bio

(03:27):
It's like gosh is that does he ever feel like is is is is that my bio and right? It's it's surreal
It really yeah, it's a real but um, I but I remember living when that was my whole identity
Yeah, it like it
Messed me up. It was a lie. You know, it was a lie. It's not the meaning of life
But now that I got my head on straight. It's extremely

(03:50):
It's surreal to hear it, you know because
Because I'm normal now, you know
I like that. Yeah, so
I've read so many
Comments well, I've read a few comments and I wanted to not go down the the rabbit trail of the comments as I researched you
over the last month or so and

(04:12):
Well, I just read the top of two two different pieces of comments. They both said this guy
seems really authentic
Right at the top both of them separate columns separate separate separate articles
So I just want to thank you
for for being that guy and there's there's so much

(04:35):
Needed room in the kingdom for that and I thank you for stepping into that space and being that guy
Right, I appreciate that. I really appreciate it. Yeah, I'm you know when you
When you have an encounter with like
You know people know about Jesus as a historic figure, but when you're in the gutter and you have an encounter with

(04:57):
His nature and his love through his spirit like supernaturally
It just changes you man and it and so I
Just I've tried to be authentic since that day I met him
Well, I love it. I love that Jesus was was
Authentic yeah

(05:19):
To say the least so there's nobody like him in the universe just it's like so much power and so much humility and
Gechnus yeah, and just the light and love and kindness, you know, it's just like
You can God can be
Any type of character and that's who he is that just melts you. Yeah, I like that song

(05:42):
The song says I melt in your peace nice it overwhelms me
That's that's when I think of Jesus I think of that. He's just
It's just it's it feels it sounds too good to be true to the natural mind and tell you
Experience it in the soul and heart is sir
Well, I'm
Highly honored I should have started this me too with this. Oh, thanks. You know, wait. We got it

(06:09):
We got a story okay. I was watching your show your TV show the first few years. I was a Christian on
I forgive it was it max TV. Yeah, but I forgive it was day start whatever but it is all yeah a bunch of it was that they stuck you like that
Man, you know you choose you wanted the midnight cuz you wanted the crowd. That's what I wanted and you got me midnight to two

(06:30):
Yeah, yeah, I'll watch you and I love you
I loved your nuggets of wisdom and then you'd play all the bands. I first heard a fly leaf on that yeah, no kidding
Yeah, great band. Yeah, I didn't I didn't know I just kind of like got out of the music industry
I didn't you know and once I saw that I saw sick and I was like who the heck is this band? They don't

(06:51):
It's like are they Christian? I was thinking because yeah, it was the song was called sick and I'm like
It sounds kind of gothy and like negative, you know, but
Once I dug in I'm like oh wow then her voice which is like didn't sound like anybody else. Yeah, so cool
We got history kind of yeah, man. I saw you at your love death love and death concert in Nashville

(07:14):
And I waited in line to introduce myself and say hello and my wife
I say I handed to the camera said hey grab this. I'm gonna say hi to get a picture of his meeting and the picture is and I'm gonna
Do my best to find it is I stepped in to say hello to you and you immediately leaned back and went like this and you said
You're the MX TV. Yeah, yeah, I'm like

(07:38):
Yeah
Told you man, it's like you know those those years they mark you when you're new Christian and everything and
And you know, it's like when people
Have it have like an impact or have a memory of like important years of your life
You always remember and so it's just like a honor thing you know, oh man. I watched your show

(08:01):
I loved what you would say and I loved how you went out of the box heck yeah, and so so yeah, that was cool
Thank you. You're like what the heck is this guy talking about
You never know what what your stuff like your podcast what all the stuff you've done. Yeah, man
I
Has meant to people you never know how it can reach people right? Yeah, and I'm an example of that

(08:25):
So my question to you is I'm gonna interview you now, okay?
Yeah, do you look back on the on the you know last couple a few decades and just be like
Are you blowing away how God has just given you stuff to reach out to people? Yeah
And and every single one of them was was stuff that I I
Didn't create or see coming they were opportunities. It's just kind of like calling like I had a band

(08:51):
Okay, I had hardcore rock band. We were based out of Amsterdam
We did nightclub evangelism all over the world like in Europe. Oh, yeah, Amsterdam Holland whoa
They're for like almost four years in other countries as well
And we we toured and a lot of peanut butter and slept on the floor more than we did on beds
And that's the truth. Yeah, wouldn't there wouldn't yeah wouldn't try it for nothing
But um that turned into a

(09:13):
An essence the band turned into a TV show and now I'm hosting a TV show and writing a TV show that I'm producing and
and and writing and overseeing the edits
zero point zero training and
Then the the television show ran a beautiful course
It's still on there and many other places around the world but for 20 years we did that

(09:36):
225 episodes and and 20 years you did that 20 years like we're with MX MX TV. Yeah. Yeah, so are you doing it with around that time too?
Wait, are you talking about MX TV was that show was that show for 20 years 20 years on 20 years?
I didn't know that yeah, so wow. Yeah, that's what we that's what we did

(09:58):
I thought you're talking about another TV show you start
No, no, just MX TV
Just just me and an electrician in his and in his RV and in his backyard
He bought he bought tons of equipment is what he's gotten trouble from his wife because he didn't tell her what he was doing
And she said well if you're gonna use you better use it for God's power and his will and do something good with this thing

(10:20):
And and he he I met him never met him the next son that Sunday in its Sunday school class
And I stood up and gave a little a call to like hey, man
We got this opportunity if anybody can help us make a TV show and he walked it to me goes what and so he goes
I'll give you 20 episodes. I'm like what he goes all at it and I'll shoot it for you

(10:41):
the and and and
60 or 70 episodes later he goes I should quit now so then the Lord developed some other people to step in so to answer
Question the beautiful piece about that is is the surprises that have that have come the way and they they and they've always
been a production a piece of creativity

(11:02):
Bro like you you talk you something creative and something
Telling people about Jesus come in together. I'm saying what time? Yeah, that's where I'm that's where I'm that's where I'm showing up
Yeah, and and so that that's what the Lord has as as used in in us and now gosh
Podcast and of all the of all the times

(11:26):
I've had three different encounters with you over the period of of of of 10 years and I always wanted to have a
An expected maybe and hope that we'd have a deep conversation at one point in our lives
And I never suspected again to answer your question again
Look at this where where the Lord uses

(11:50):
Different creative pieces in in in our lives if that's the way that we're built and they that's what he does
Love so many things that you've said. I can't wait to talk to you continue here in a minute
But like about some of the things that I've seen in you that I love so much and
Can I ask you another question? Yeah, I'm interviewing you. Yes, please. Oh

(12:12):
Did you ever heard of no longer music in L.A. I'm so David so not you know David and Aaron and Ben
Yeah, so Aaron and Ben used to be a part of meetings at Stiger at David's apartment in Amsterdam
Yeah, when I when I was my band the friendlies was was on stop. We used to open up for when you said Amsterdam in Europe

(12:32):
I was like that's what no longer David. How you doing David man?
Hi, I'm Aaron and the crew. Uh-huh. Love y'all. I love those guys. I see I keep in
Contact with them. We do stuff over in Europe every time I tour over there. We do something usually
Poland or yeah, Poland. Yeah, been there like four times. Yeah, Luke big tour greenwood and yeah, Anja and shout out to them too

(12:57):
So stiger international STI GER international. Yes, amazing ministry. Yep, amazing ministry
Stiger is a Dutch word for peer and that's where the boat was located
We all got we all got our feet dirty and neat and knees knees bruised and and
Dirty and bloody as well

(13:17):
Mixing it up in there on that on that tugboat park behind the Grand Central Station in Amsterdam, all of it
We did we did tours. Oh, we sorry. We did concerts every Saturday night and we'd hand out free tickets free tickets around the train station
And off throughout where all the squatters were and the travelers and say free rock concert and they're like what you see God move

(13:39):
Oh, bro
And it was sweaty and hot and that you could touch the ceiling without even jumping and
Roll punk rock rock rock rock rock. So it was it was super cool. Yeah
Thanks for asking. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll let you interview me now. Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay. Well, I just want to bounce off some some fun facts

(14:03):
Okay, yeah, some fun some fun facts. I'm just pull this thing right up here
Spin is longer is a little time as you what but I got I got several and then I want to dive into some some some super
What I hope to be in great meat
Okay, to help a lot of people. Yeah, you started out wanting to wanted to play guitar and your dad

(14:26):
Said that maybe you should sorry drums. Yeah, so our drums and maybe you shouldn't so you don't have to care about so many drums
Why don't you play guitar if that looks like it worked out pretty good?
Yeah, thank God for my dad man, and he was thinking like I don't want a bunch of racket in my house
Yeah, he's a little some problem. Yeah, he's smart. He's like smart just use but that's that shows I dad had his issues and and he's shared about that

(14:51):
I've shared our family struggles, but I mean what that shows a good hearted dad where he's like you're not playing
No drums in my house like he didn't say that no
He you know, he don't want you don't want about the future for you because maybe you hadn't been on you didn't have the tools to think about that
Right ten or twat, but in his head he's like I don't want to hear that racket, but he didn't tell me that so that was it

(15:15):
That's a good dad, but I feel like he was
He was plugging into gods
with them too because I
Never would have been a successful drummer. I can't even play guitar and like stamp of wow do that
I can't sing him play so I can't there's no way I could do this

(15:37):
There's no way I did come up with a style with with my brother my guitar twin brother monkey
Mine from corn yeah, they did and we did come up with something, but I would have been so discouraged. Yeah playing drums
I never would have gotten I just guitar up my thing guitar magazine said that

(15:58):
You and monkey are the
26 out of the top 100 get taros of
Rock music of all time see I'm not sure that worked out. I'm not pretty long, although I'm trying to be realistic
Okay, that was a
When we were hot like in the 90s and it was all like we were everywhere. That's when they put that out

(16:24):
Now if they did that we wouldn't be in the hundred because there's so many good players
We were just talking about animals as leaders and stuff like there are
Ridiculous guitar players out there and yes, I think corn should be you know honored for a sound that we created
But as far as guitarists we should not be on that list and I'm just saying

(16:47):
I think corn should be on a cool list, but I don't think I said guitar should there's just such good players out there
So rando question not exactly
I have a but I'm thinking McGee it seems to be somewhere if you've heard that him in that
Current loop I think he's doing stuff with the guitar and making sounds that I

(17:11):
Before McGee really
I think it's MCGE oh yeah, so check that out. Yeah
So I did not know this but you were a principal organizer of the whosoever's I knew you were in it
But I didn't know you were a part of the big organs or organizing of that well not I haven't been for for a few years

(17:35):
You know a lot of a lot of religious people out there don't understand that how home and corn because
For whatever reason you know my singers got language or whatever out from stage
That's about the only thing that goes on and and so
Sometimes it gives problems to the whosoever so I kind of like backed backed out just because I don't want to give him problems and

(17:56):
But I text with with the guy that's running with it Ryan Reese. Yep, like every other day like we're tight and
Sonny sand of all POD. Yep, so we were all co-founders with that in 2009 that who's whoever's saying Ryan has taken it and
He's he started radio show he goes to speaks around the country and and parts of the world and

(18:21):
now he's in Idaho and
He just came up with a whosoever's building got donations and and they're they're
Just finishing the build out and it's amazing. He's like he goes
Yeah, I can't wait for you guys to see it. So like we might replicate them across the country, you know really so yeah
So it's like I go in and I'm a part for a little bit than I'm out

(18:46):
Yeah, you know, but but yeah, there was there's just some
There's just some religious people that just have the made things hard for Ryan a couple of times
It's like dude. I don't we're gonna be I don't want to make problems for you
You know, we're gonna get what we're going there here in a minute, okay?
So thanks for bringing that up. Yeah, we'll get there last fun last fun fact is just the name

(19:09):
I
Believe Jonathan the singer came up with it corn because y'all thought it was cool
Maybe because it's a reminder of children of the corn in the Santa kind of creepy and cool
That was me
I was like
Once he said corn or like corn that's stupid and then because I'm thinking C.O.R.N. corn

(19:30):
The corn you eat and he goes no, it's like K.O.R.N. we could do a backwards R and spell it like a kid was trying to spell corn and they couldn't
And love it and then I don't think it was talked about then but maybe subconsciously in Jonathan's mind was the toys RS
Had a backwards R.A. also we are from Bakersfield and

(19:52):
Buck Owens is a famous country star and
Merle Haggard was from you know and they had a show called he ha y'all I know you remember oh yeah
So on he how the great years different set fake radio station on he how was corn? I think it was K.O.R.N.
No way wait now that I think it was
But it was K.O.R.N. it wasn't corn it was K.O.R.N. okay, all right, so but anyway

(20:21):
All that and there's a couple stories run around but when I heard the idea I was thinking yeah children of the corn yeah that movie like
There was just I used to love horror movies. I don't watch them anymore just because for obvious reasons, you know
You know, I'm not saying you know to each their own. I just don't watch them. Yeah, and

(20:43):
And that movie I when I was into them that movie was so like just
Scary, you know because it's like these kids were in a cornfield and they're killing people. Yeah, and I'm just like
This is so cool. So back then I was like yeah corn. It's like children of the corn, you know, so
But but anyway, it was just like my drummer at the time said he's like corn is kind of a dumb name

(21:07):
But people will never forget it. Yeah, and then we put it looked creepy with the you know the logo
Yeah, and we so before we got signed we just we're from Huntington Beach, California
We put stickers all over
Huntington Beach like on buildings on stop signs on bars on cards. We just slap them everywhere and people did not know what it was

(21:29):
Yeah corn thing and they didn't even hear our music. They didn't know it was a band. It's not it look cool
But yeah, it was a branding technique
It was before Google and Yahoo and all these made up words, you know, it's like you know
I'm not saying we start here nothing but like you see how many times like people come up with a branding or they take a word and they
Change the spelling that's like so common and I think corn tapped into that in the early days, you know

(21:54):
So it stuck 30 years later our manager at the time Larry wine trobby worked at epic records and he was our manager
On the side he said there's no way you're gonna be taken seriously or we'll have a career with the name like corn
And we were like still set on it because we love the spelling and the backwards are
We're like okay, well, we're gonna call our band Larry then

(22:16):
No, we're gonna name it after you and he's like well fine keep corn, but it's never gonna
You're never gonna break out with that name and so he had to he had to leave us like a year later because epic found out he was managing
They said you're not gonna be doing two things
We saw him like 10 years later after we blew up in Japan and he was like oh my gosh. I was so wrong

(22:38):
Why didn't I just keep managing you guys I should have quit epic?
But I think he's done really really great in his career, you know, but yeah, well, I think I think it's also cool how
The your fans that that like corn or sometimes we for do his corn kids
Which reminds me of the children of the corn but anyway, so so I also read it's been a song and then there's been like sometimes we did some stuff

(23:04):
So just think yeah things online we were doing internet
Shows online when it's like dial up. Yeah, 94 96 and and Jonathan came up with that. Yeah, he was a computer
So I thought he was doing stuff that nobody was doing big time live shows on dial up. Yeah, he was like

(23:25):
He was like this iconic singer
From the beginning. I'm like this guy has something special, but on the side he was like a nerd too like on a he was a computer nerd
And he I think more towards gaming, you know, and I was like only nerds have computers Jonathan like why are we doing an internet show?
He goes no trust me. Yeah, it's coming. Yeah, and I was like okay. Yeah, let's do it then and then that was 94

(23:51):
It took me till 2001 to get my first computer and it was not even a Mac and then 2002
He told me about these Apple laptops
What and I'm like what he's he goes if you hate computers. You'll love it. They told me it's like simple and I go good
Because I hate these pieces is what I was told. Yeah, and it's not you know, it's like for artists

(24:13):
Intuitive but it's not sorry. Yeah, the computer's not intuitive. Somebody's not a computer person no matter what they call the brand
But I was hooked me too. I was like addicted well, I was on drugs too
So I was like that would do math and just like learn everything about the computer
Yeah, how to record how to do pictures out of like everything email all that yeah, so

(24:34):
history history
So I learned I always
Never knew if it's that a thing I always never knew up, but I never knew
Why and how you got your name had I'm like I never looked it up. I just was kind of wondered
Well, I found out that you know some of your band members had said well your heads

(24:56):
Big too big for your body, so we're gonna call you had well, it was it was other friends. Okay, because it wasn't my band members
It was other friends when I was growing up. I just had a big head, you know, you look at all your friends
You do a picture or something. They're like you got a big go ahead and you look at the picture and we like
Yeah, it is kind of big. Well, gosh what I want to bring
To you that is the the absolute truth

(25:19):
For me and that is that from what I've seen
in our ten years of
Seen each other two or three times and researching over this
last bit of time that
your
Heart is what is so giant

(25:40):
Rather than my head rather than your head
Big time brother. Thank you. I thought you're gonna say well, I've been researching you for now and there's interactions last ten years off and on
I've decided that your head is really big
It it well macro cranial and you've made it cool again evidently. It's inherited and yeah from a family of big ads. Thank you

(26:02):
I love it
Well, I appreciate saying that man. I just uh, I've always
Even when we blew up in corn. I've always tried to be nice to people and
Those fans that were always try to meet us. Yeah, it's like we would let even my other guys in corn
We would let certain people in like from the beginning

(26:24):
We would be
Man if you're gonna try that hard to meet us like what's your name man? Where are you from? We'd go hang out with them
Have some beers. Yeah, and then when it blew up like a 98 99 so big we lost track because it was just too many people like we couldn't
But uh, we always try to be kind and everything so I feel like
So I asked the Lord in my heart and else 12

(26:46):
I never went to church and never told anybody my neighbors and my friends
Took me in after I got bullied for a couple years and they treated me kind and they were Christians and they told me about Jesus
And they just said all you gotta do is ask them in your heart and and they never invited me to church or anything
But I believe this at 12. Yep. Yeah, and Christ came into my heart then. I just didn't know how to

(27:12):
Help that seed grow. Yeah, so I felt like I always said not love it
But I felt like I always had a good heart. Yeah, but it just got like corrupted by the world
Yeah, my same same story brother
um
So what I want to do in this the in our time here is

(27:35):
To let people see
the heart of Brian Welch
um
I think maybe you're
The name had has been a part of your your famous name, but
To me what has made you
Famous since I met you as I saw your heart and I saw all kind of

(28:00):
things that that are
In your story I sort of saw in between the lines and what was in between the lines constantly was your big
Very big heart. So I want to thank you for that and um
Appreciate it. Yes, sir, and I want to bring out, you know, there's there's

(28:20):
Loud crazy love. Well, I want to bring out um something that's
Different than the loud and that's that this quietness that I see in you that's very very admirable
So before we go there
Let's get loud and let's watch this loud crazy love clip and this is Brian in case you didn't know

(28:46):
I just looked up and I just said father
I can't pray when I'm on drugs do anything you want to my life. How do I pay a phone bill?
How can you change so suddenly? How do I know this is real like to be a great?
He's like Janelle. I'm putting corn on a stay home, but I'm like wait
Is that even allowed? I was devastated. God's telling me to do this and God's telling him like that was an act of love for himself and his daughter

(29:12):
But I immediately started making bad choices
He had been physical
Unching holes and walls
She just couldn't connect with anybody. I assume things are gonna be different people offered her drugs and like I got physical
I flip tables. I can't control my rage. I'm stressed out or just want it someone to realize I'm hurting
She says I cut myself because of you and I said I hate you. You're a whore. I gave up everything for you

(29:44):
Everybody that doesn't live their life like this. That's who's crazy
Well, yeah, so loud crazy love what I you know, I
I'm the one to be the first one in line for for loud. I like loud

(30:06):
I think just out of
Respect before we go into the quiet part. I just want to acknowledge you for your loud love for your
daughter
I want to acknowledge you for your very loud
love for Jesus and standing in your faith

(30:29):
No matter what context you're put in and I thank you for that. I appreciate that about you
Yeah, thanks for saying that I'm wired
Like that. I'm just I feel like I'm out of the box. I'm not trying to be nobody. I'm just trying to be myself
You know, but yeah, I don't know. I just from day one

(30:50):
I'm like
When I met Christ them and I was like everything needs to change
I need to I need to be like so I need to figure out who I am and not be ashamed of that
And so once I knew I was going to be a follower of Christ like a full-on. I'm like, okay. I'm going to be very

(31:12):
outspoken about it and
Trying to navigate that in a way to where at first I was obnoxious with it because that's what happens to a new Christians a lot
And then you know more of a balanced approach where you know, you lead with love yeah and uh
And then I wanted to be very a very present father now that Christ is in my life

(31:35):
So I was able to you know
I have the because there's no way before Jesus that I would have the strength to leave the band
Yeah, even for my kid and you're just hit some peak. Yeah, there's 25 million something on the dollar
Yeah, the table and it's just at that spot where you like
You walked away because yeah, they're different. I almost ruined their deal. They got a

(31:58):
Like we got a 20 I think it's 23 million dollars and
You know been 90 or no 2003-ish. Yeah, they started talking about that deal and
And that's when I met Jesus and I was like okay, well, I'm not gonna take that. I'm gonna leave it and be home with my kid
So it just was uh, it was super naturally did it work in me where I

(32:21):
I needed
It was like my chance to break that idol money was an idol, you know and uh, you know
Not that I was broke until two years later. I went broke but yeah, but uh when I left it was like a declaration
To God in the spirit world like no, I choose I choose God and my daughter over

(32:44):
That money and the fame, you know amazing so unheard of really. I mean incredibly rare doesn't even yeah
The right word and then and then
Interred the testing to wear like oh, would will he really stay with Christ when

(33:08):
When you look like you're not blessed when the money I was like everything I got
I lost everything
financially in two years
2008 crisis happened bad business
Partners bad business management on my part two
Lost everything like I was looking for quarters to buy my daughter lunch in for two weeks and so

(33:34):
That got tested to where like am I gonna leave Christ after everything gets really bad and that's why I feel
Bad for Kanye West because he went through that thing
You know, he's a billionaire and he
Any found Christ and then the Lord you know wanted to take him through that
The preparation testing is preparation where you get and prepared

(33:57):
and you're gonna be like
You're gonna be given the decision are you gonna stay with Jesus you know when
When when you're going through a personal cross, he'll take you to lead like Jesus was led into the desert, right? Yeah to be tested by
Yeah, the the Satan it says we're gonna be
Led away into things to be prepared and tested

(34:22):
In order to get us past that into into our true destiny. Yeah, so you get low and humbled and then he build you from there
Yeah, and I feel bad. I was watching Kanye West showing up at the Grammys with his girl naked and everything last night
He's just like
He got offended at the process and the preparation that Christ takes you through and he just went right back to dark and

(34:46):
So I'm just grateful that I made it through you know
Yeah, we are to tell me
what
It feels like for for somebody that's you you became a lover of Jesus to your to your to the best capacity that you had but he changed your heart at 12

(35:07):
then
Terrible twos as I've heard you guys say how about how old were you when when you had that second encounter where you
Turned your life over to Jesus. Um actually
It was 34 34 I was thinking so I'd heard y'all talk about the terrible twos is in the 20s

(35:32):
That's when I came to Jesus. I became a christen at 10 and I came back to him
At 27 the great beautiful thing is genuinely he never left me and in many ways I never left him but my behaviors were
Completing something completely different. I was very trapped
And I know that you you have a piece of that obviously I was it was neat to hear you came to Jesus at 12 and then at 30

(35:59):
What 30 some 34 34 as when you
Read committed your life. I don't know how to say but you you got overhauled you got transformed you got shaken up
I feel like the first thing at 12 was like a seed. Yeah, and then 34 was the real like oh
I'm all in and

(36:19):
Yeah, it's just it's a thing where I once it takes deep route. Yeah, and then
It's really gonna happen. You know, it's like you were really gonna eyes open
You know surrendered yeah all of it if you could put words on it
Can you describe what it looks like what it feels like to to have

(36:39):
God
Working on you quietly but with consistent perseverance
During those years that that um
When you were not walking with him because he he was talking to you
uh
From what I can presume what is that what does that look like for somebody that's never really had the

(37:03):
Thycane the Jesus walked away but he never left me during that time. Is that quietness look like
It's wild because when you look back you see it, you know, yeah, and I remember
He was reaching out to me now that I know God's presence. I felt his presence a couple times
Throughout my 20s and stuff even I'd say to my late

(37:25):
So the thing at 12 happened and then in my late teens I had a dream
were
I won't get into the dream, but I felt
God's presence in the dream and I felt his presence when I woke up and then
when my
daughter jenay was born. Yeah, I

(37:47):
felt God's presence pouring to the room. Yeah, it was like I thought it
It was a love that was supernatural and I felt it for my daughter. I felt like a you know to the mirror
The miracle of life, you know, if she was born and then
but now it was not just

(38:10):
I love for a child. It was God's love for me and her and my
And he was like trying to give me revelation, you know, as maybe the father
Yeah, yeah, you yeah, and stuff like that and then there's a couple others, but um
I just see these
These things and then I call it I

(38:32):
Call I say it like this like bombs started dropping in my life when I hit 30 years old
And the first bomb was divorce and I went through the hardest divorce ever where
my ex-wife um
she got
driven away from me by these um white supremacists like you know,

(38:58):
felons
You know and so it was like evil came into my world and took my wife away from me and I ended up with full custody my daughter
And so that was like the first bomb and then second bomb was
Um the bomb of guilt where I was trying to be a good father, but I kept failing, you know
And then the third bomb was the bomb of addiction and so I see God and those

(39:22):
Like they were horrific
difficult things to walk through those three bombs like and
You know, I had hard things from 10 to say
34 yeah, but like
When about sorry 10 to 30 I had hard things happen, but at 30 years old I felt like he started saying okay

(39:46):
I'm gonna get him to surrender
And like these difficult difficult things are gonna
Uh get him to his knees where he begs for help because he's not gonna be able to get out of this
I mean suicidal so like all that so
God when he has a calling for you and I feel like he's like the doors open for everybody

(40:07):
God so love the world that he gave his only son I whoever believe in him, but I feel like there's um
There are some people that like he
He has a calling for I think everyone's called to some degree, but some people it just feels like he's like hey
I need you to do something get over here, you know, yeah, and so
I'm just uh, I'm not I'm not special. I don't think any of those people are special more special than anybody else. I just feel like

(40:36):
There's there's just a purpose and so that's that's what he did through sufferings
Really got me to a place where I was like God I need your help. Please please help me and then boom
So what what that could happen to any human what enabled you were to
uh when the sufferings were happening to just go

(40:57):
Thanks, but no thanks. Thanks for not helping. Where are you? What what was different where you
Solve the you went through the suffering and and knew that he had
I don't want to put words in your mouth, but mouth, but never leave you
He had never forsaken you. He had never relaxed his hold upon you says the scripture
I will not need to grieve without support

(41:19):
and how intuitively or or the Holy Spirit or or or
How did that play out in your life because because often um people don't have that that quiet resolve
That you had like and they walk away
For when I was a Christian for a few years and then the horrible stuff started happening. Yeah

(41:42):
I tell you what there's a scripture says
Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God and so what I would do was
Listen to messages all the time. I'd find people that I've that I felt a resonance with that I could
I was on their same frequency where they're preaching or pastors or churches. I would go to those churches online

(42:08):
And I would always be feeding myself and so I would learn that
popular ministers
Had a story of where they were living out of their car at at one point, you know sleeping on floors. Yeah, dude
Um getting chased by

(42:28):
Bill collectors and so I would be like oh
My gosh, they were getting prepared, but they were like getting prepared in the sufferings
Yeah, and so when I started going through that I had a knowledge of
Well, am I better than them like
I guess God is preparing me too
So but I would forget because when you're in the middle of it you forget and then you're like doubt and then the voices come like

(42:56):
Oh, man, you did something wrong or
uh
You're supposed to be smarter than this idiot like how'd you let yourself get into this and then
But looking back I feel like it was it was like
Prepared for me to go through that and I didn't have understanding so I made all these mistakes

(43:17):
So it'd get me into this place where I'm just like
At the bottom like
So low humbled so low, you know
To where you know, you just be like whatever it is if it's my fault or other people taking advantage of me or stealing from me
I'm here and I need to trust you and you need to get me out of this and I'm not leaving you. It's like the disciples

(43:41):
They said
The disciples at one point said Jesus you have the words of life like Jesus goes, are you gonna leave too? Because everybody left
And he goes where are we gonna go you have the words to life that's all I felt I'm like
It's like I had that choice. Are you gonna leave me now that everything shattered in your life?
I'm like Lord like where am I gonna go?

(44:01):
Like you you are life like I'm
So be it if I'm gonna you know sit here for however long
And one point it was my biggest fear was having to call my my parents or like a friend or like family and be like
Can we can we stay with you like I'm in hard times and having like I'm gonna bring my Grammys and boxes to their house and put in the garage

(44:24):
like Grammy Awards and be like
Here I am now. I was a rock star of millionaire, but can I live in do you have a spare room if a spare room?
Sleep on the couch. Yeah, that never got to that. It was two weeks away
Where I had to make a call to somebody but
somebody in
Like probably 20 minutes from here though lent me money. Yeah to hire a bankruptcy lawyer and that was like almost a cat

(44:49):
Kind of stay in your room moment
I couldn't believe that
I had to ask to borrow money to hire a bankruptcy lawyer
But that was that was another low point because one low point was when I couldn't get lunch from my my daughter
I didn't have the money and then we were looking for coins right then I got a check right yeah, and then that money

(45:10):
Was gone after
I moved to you know to change states and then next thing you know
I'm broke again, and I'm like what am I gonna do what am I gonna do what am I gonna do?
And this guy lent me $10,000 to hire and guess what this lawyer was a Christian yeah, and he goes can I want to tell you story

(45:32):
and he had a story that
his law partner
Totally ran their business to the ground behind his back and
Moved out of the country and left him with everything and he goes I had to go through bankruptcy
Not due to my fault. It was this other guy and he goes

(45:52):
It was the best thing that ever happened to me going through the bankruptcy. It gave me a new beginning and
And he told me about how you can't let it make you feel guilty and you feel like a loser that the bankruptcy code is there for
It's made for good people who get go through hard times
Not made for people that take advantage of it. So he just took all this

(46:15):
stigma yeah off of it and then right then was my bottom and
God's built
Brick by Bricksonson
Amazing right yeah, well
Gosh, I mean, I was just wanting people to hear what it feels like for somebody in spite of of all the odds coming from your past

(46:37):
To just to not be chained by that and continued to walking forward
continue to walk forward and and again in spite of all odds and we're going to go here in a second
Even with the negativity of well, what's surrounded you?
I'm going to presume and we'll hear about it with other Christians because they can be brutal
um in spite of the whole thing money loss and and trophies in a box

(47:00):
Asked if somebody if you could hold them for you while you go slept on their couch
I mean, thank you for for for
What you had said to the father well, where else am I going to go?
And uh, dude, that's it's powerful and it's true and um
Yeah, I honor you

(47:23):
uh
For listening to that voice for staying on the path in in spite of in spite of
all the odds man and
I tasted a you had a taste of eternal life through Jesus talks about the living water
out of your belly or flow
Rivers of living water. So once you taste that

(47:44):
It's just if you're plugged in and you keep getting that knowledge and you keep listening and reading the Bible reading other books gaining wisdom from people that been there
and uh keep listening to messages and it's like
That will keep you on the path in and you know that God is so good than that

(48:08):
the only reason you're going through hard times is because
Of his love for you because it's it's forming you into the image of his son Christ, you know all the sufferings are
Making us like him. Yeah, you know, so once you know that you should have some foreign knowledge so you don't quit

(48:30):
You know, but yeah when you're in that and once you know that it's just like I feel like that's what helped me not walk away, you know
So I think you just answered the question. I'll move into the section um um I call um church hurt
But hurt church herders. Yeah, and there's a lot of them. There's a lot of them and uh I grew up my dad was a

(48:55):
Megapaster had 22,000 members in his church and um wow
Yeah, there's a bunch you've seen a lot. I have seen a lot. So you you rebelled till you're 27 probably because of it. I did
Wow. Yeah, even though I love Jesus like a like a told you
You're like, I don't want to be one of them um yeah, that's valid too, you know, but just it is I saw a lot in my dad told me he said um

(49:22):
Don't in it sounds simple
Was profound and guess what it worked it stuck in me. He said um don't keep your eyes on people
Keep your eyes on Jesus because I saw all the stuff in 22,000 is a bunch of people and a bunch of good people
That that that that didn't

(49:45):
were not
Their actions were not good. They were horrific and and
And it could have easily chose easily chose
Screw this whole thing man if these are the leaders and they're doing fill in the blank um
This whole thing's a bunch of junk

(50:07):
A bunch of it all kind of stuff I could say there. Yeah, but I didn't walk away
Because I kept my dad told me keep my eyes on Jesus
the author and the finisher of our faith and and I was able to do that and I've seen you be able to do that

(50:27):
um
Brian I can't imagine I can only imagine where I I have some context because I can't I can't imagine but I can only imagine
That when you came to Christ um
um
That that people good intent intentioned people good
people

(50:49):
giving you
some some some terrible
advice or
comments to you that had to probably hurt
I had to hurt yeah
how
And the funny thing is
You had it coming from both sides yet you had your corn fans like oh Jesus what the heck is he doing?

(51:12):
And then you got the Christians going oh do it you're gonna have to cut them dredge you
Have to get those tattoos burned off. I don't know you know those are silly little things
It's a lot lot lot deeper than that who cares about the looks stuff. I I certainly don't I think it's
I think it's sweet
Well, what about the things that just cut to your heart and so how did you stay in the game?

(51:36):
Because that is one of that those quiet pieces that I recognize in you brother
That you've been you've been on this for for years and you've heard a lot you've heard
Christians say a lot of stuff to you. How did you how did you stay on in the game?
um
blocking people on social media

(51:57):
lashing back out at them which was a mistake but
making posts to try to get my fans to
go after them mistake
But the best part was just blocking them and getting rid but that that became
A job in itself full-time job because there were so many of them and um

(52:23):
So yeah, you just get to a place where
You know, it's it did it did hurt, you know, but but uh
You gotta understand that's part of it. There's always gonna be somebody says something but the funny thing is
No, but he's one person said it to my face. It's all been online

(52:44):
Only one person has not and has ever pulled you aside and and and said something to you
And good intentions that you're like
And that's cool that it didn't land. No, that's that's that's one of the gifts that you have because I think they're that might be
Not one person has come you know those mean comments that you've seen too in your pages

(53:09):
And not one person has come to my face with that kind of energy like with a mean like what the hell you think you are
Sorry, who do you just being real like yes, you know, they are not they've never said that to my face. It's all online
Right as you have you had you know
Difficult things you know I grew up my hair long

(53:36):
I moved Amsterdam. I started a hardcore rock band and you know good intention no good intentions people
Said a lot of just stupid things in your face like say like pull me aside
You know you're not being a Christian with that long hair stuff like that. Yeah, I'm hundred whoa. I've never had that
I've had a couple nice people like hey, can I ask you a question

(53:57):
So what do you think you
Do you think it's okay that you do this and like you're in corner? I've had that
I've never had someone that those mean commented people. I've never had that in front of my face. Okay. I don't know why
That's amazing. Well then there you go. So that's beautiful. Maybe it's a God's protectors. Yeah, because I'm like
On-slotted

(54:18):
Maybe they think that all like attack them physically because I look
So whatever the case I like that they haven't
something that
We're we got we got I think two more sections one of which is something that I saw in you and
And I see in you is that you had

(54:43):
Said something to the effect of we at one point at the height of of
The corn career you guys are still touring you guys
That's the that's beautiful by the way. I think that's amazing that you've done that that you've
gone
Back with corn full respect. Thank you. It's yeah, it's like a musician area in my opinion. I don't think it's just being a

(55:08):
A musician area to the band. It's musician area to all the people you're playing for it's the musician for the people that you're playing
That you're talking to afterwards and
It doesn't have to be anything. It doesn't have to be musician area
But that's just the context that that that that I had when I was doing
My music is a missionary, but you're you're your your presence

(55:32):
there and and Brian still being 100%
Brian yet as has been changed by the by the by the heart of God and that you live that out
continually in front of all that that God puts you in front of
Like full respect. I think I don't know if you've been

(55:56):
handed hate for I would imagine you've been handed hate for going back to corn after you had had had you had your Jesus experience
How can you do that? Well, I think it's amazing and
One of the things that you said Brian
Was you had an experience at some point where you got you said you were feeling like you understood

(56:18):
that
when
all of this fame was happening
That and the and the glory of of all that came there with it glory or not glory just all the pieces
um that you at some point you realized that this wasn't for me this that all of this is not for me

(56:39):
It's for the fans. I think corn fans
Yeah, that you were able to be a part of of something happening there
um the reconciliation
Yeah reconciliation when it moved from this is about Brian to I get to be a part of these people's
Heelings how has how has that piece been a piece of your life today as well that you get to be a part of people's healing. Yeah, it's

(57:06):
You know when when you're healed
You have a gift to help heal people because it's christian you doing it through you
And so that's like better than
Anything in the world
When you know you're making a difference and in helping to heal people and um
You know whether it's like

(57:27):
just
posting things online people reading the books
uh
You know people seeking God apps after seeing your story, you know still happens to this day just post some stuff someone will read him and be like
I need to get right, you know, yeah, and so they relate and then God uses it and

(57:48):
It's just it's mind-blowing because
That's what it's gonna matter when we're long gone from here. Mm-hmm. That's the stuff that's gonna
resonate and keep
um
Like the testimonies, you know, yeah, that's gonna be
I've told my story for like 20 years now. Yeah, and it's still

(58:09):
Just so important. Yeah, and so just think of eternity like it's always
It's always gonna be there
And just what what Jesus did to my life. Hello. I was you know how far gone. I was almost almost gonna be
Over with and Jesus did this for me like that's gonna be the story that's gonna echo for eternity

(58:33):
Like the great I think that air is gonna be
Made with gratefulness and like, you know, I mean so that we never forget that's really cool
So that we never forget and so
When I think of being a part of of healing of helping to heal fans and and you know like that
I think of that it's gonna it's gonna be

(58:54):
um
Part of the story of heaven forever. So I'm I'm like undone with that man
It's like if you think about it too much. Yeah, I've been crying a lot lately just because I'm really sensitive, you know
and it's like a song or
You know just meditating on Christ or something like that and I just like I cry easy and I love it and so

(59:17):
So yeah, it's just um
It's just amazing man. It's gonna be
We don't even know how amazing it is we get glimpses, but it's gonna be shocking
The just the supernatural just
Beauty that we're gonna be breathing in living in looking at
For forever and people some people are like how could you believe that sounds like a fairy tale? Yeah, well

(59:43):
The no i has seen no no ears heard no minus conceived these things it says in the Bible
But God has revealed it to us by his spirit. Mm-hmm. So he's saying in the Bible
Yeah, you haven't even comprehended this stuff, but I give you glimpses now through my spirit. Yeah
That's the only reason why I would believe it because I've experienced some of it

(01:00:05):
Wow, so so wow so that that glimpse that you that you
Uh are describing and even experiencing right now with that sensitivity and that breath
That will be breathing at all times of gratitude
Yeah, oh my gosh

(01:00:26):
So great it's gonna be wow. I mean, I've always said like
You know the the the air's like
You know Christ love in the air that's gonna be like the oxygen or whatever however it's gonna be it's spiritual
So who we don't know yeah, but uh that's the first time I've said that gratitude
I mean because
We're never gonna forget where we came from you know and how messed up the earth was and what he did for us

(01:00:52):
You know yeah, it's gonna be gratitude like we're just gonna be
Living in gratitude forever. So I think I think part of of what you're saying in this living in gratitude. I think it
That easily takes me to my next
Question and peace where I want to hear from you one of your big things is at least at least this is what you said

(01:01:14):
Um on the worldwide web
um
You said that a big part of you is believing that if if if it is supposed to happen
It'll happen or if it's meant to be it'll happen
um
so from what

(01:01:35):
I know of you and and and um
perceive you as you have a high work ethic
how do you balance the attitude of
If it's supposed to happen it'll happen with a a the the work ethic that God's putting you
That's it's

(01:01:58):
It's a balancing act right?
That's a great question. It's uh
I feel like
Door shut when it's time for me to rest and I just like kind of
I kind of like I'm in that place now where the doors of touring shut
So I slow down, you know

(01:02:19):
But at the same time I'm season yeah, and I'm in a place where I'm like
Everyone's got a podcast, you know, and it's like so cool what you guys are doing and so many others
And so I'm thinking about that like shall I be maybe I should be getting out there and being more vocal, you know
and um
So

(01:02:39):
I'm trying to figure out like you but at the same time
What does it say it says that we are we're saved by
By uh not by our works, right? Yes, sir
But the only place that says to strive for is to enter his rest in Hebrews is strive to enter his rest labor even
Yeah, it's work. Yeah, yeah, dude. Talk about yeah

(01:03:00):
Yeah, we got to enter that rest. So there's a balancing act of
Like go go go and doing stuff
But living in that rest too. So I'm just I still navigate that and and try to balance that out
But it's not it's not always easy. Yeah, you know, but if like something's not working out and

(01:03:20):
Feels like doors are slammaged shut. I'm like okay lord. I'm just gonna let go of this. Yeah, you know
and I kind of got a
Kind of know it inside, you know, um, whether to keep pounding on the door or just to let it go. Yeah, but um
That's hard thing me a bit. Yeah, I'll keep I usually a pound for quite a while most of the time

(01:03:41):
That's cool if you know you're supposed to do it then
Knock and keep on knocking and the door will be opened, you know, so I I respect that it's like
You know looking back in your life. I'm sure you see like oh, I should that wasn't it
I put my pride pushed that too far. That wasn't it
Because he wanted me to go this direction. I'm sure you have those stories, but but at the same time

(01:04:02):
Um, I respect that that you're there's a lot of lazy people out there and you're not one of them
Thank you. Yeah, my dad taught me that it reminds me of
um the monk that the monkey that
puts his hand in the monkey jar to grab the cookies and he sit there just trying to pull the cookies out

(01:04:22):
versus let him go and and let him go and most of the time praise
praise God
line him tilt the tilt tilt the jar when it's supposed to happen
It comes out and and when we hold on we can't even get our hand out of the jar
My dad always used to say that um, who's great by the way? He'd love you. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Oh, man

(01:04:46):
Yeah
Um, he always used to say uh, that when uh when it happens ripe
Um, you don't have to yank it off the tree. It's it just you touch it and it comes and oh wow
And that's beautiful. That's beautiful. God's timing and and
Rest

(01:05:06):
A friend of mine goes on the streets and preachers to
Shares with people. I don't like to say preach good. You think street preacher
But uh, yeah, he shares and he says he says people are like apples
And he said you go and share with them and you don't go worry about rejection because like if if they're ripe and they're ready
Then the apple fall easily. Yeah, but if it's not if you're like you're trying to pull it

(01:05:30):
Yeah, then they're just not ready. It's okay. Yeah. Don't feel rejection walk to the next person
So that makes me think maybe a little more time on the on the yeah on the branch on the line there and and God will bring the
Another person in their life because he's exactly. He's good like that. So Brian our
Our conviction at stand-up dude

(01:05:52):
motto creed slogan
But it's it's more than that. It's a conviction
um to be the man that you're created to be
And coming from a man who is doing what he's created to be I loved it in the movie when you were walking back on the stage for the first time
And when you came back to corn and and you they narrated over your voice and you said I'm just doing

(01:06:18):
Uh what I'm meant to do
So
Coming from a man that is is doing what he's meant to do what's the one reminder that you would give men especially young men out there
That would enable them
To be the man that they're created to be

(01:06:40):
For themselves as well as how you have seen it for you. I mean I think
Just developing and actually
spending time to develop a relationship
With Christ like one-on-one you know that has been the the pivotal piece of my journey

(01:07:03):
um, you know go into church
And praying before you go to bed during the week going to church on Sunday
It's just it's not enough in my opinion to
For what Jesus died for he wants to lead and guide you and he wants you to talk to him and
try to

(01:07:25):
It is a mystery right and we're getting guided but we're sometimes a miss it and and that that chasing and that um
That that trying to to hear his his voice or his messages his signs trying to see his signs and wonders of
What we're supposed to do where we're supposed to go um is

(01:07:46):
The most important thing, okay church is supposed to be the gas station to fill us up for the rest of the week we're supposed to
Read read books listen to books listen to messages podcasts
There's so much information out there to help you grow yeah, and so develop that personal daily walk with with Christ. Yeah

(01:08:08):
Yeah, no problem
So we we thank you so reading the word uh going church but not but not just going to church and and learning to hear his voice is basically what I heard you say
um
So communion to communion it's like gathering what I mean what's God's message in the Bible? It's a love

(01:08:31):
Love like over and over love love love and if there's guys it's hard for us to
Because we think you know
You know
When we find a woman we love them we date them we'll hopefully marry them and we open our heart to them, you know
It's harder for sometimes guys for the concept to open our heart to God

(01:08:54):
But we got to remember Jesus he walked the earth as a man, but he's
He's he's more than that. He's the son of God
Where
Male and female came from God, you know, he's he's other than yeah, so if we just need to open our heart
To learn how to receive his love yeah as
a god yeah

(01:09:17):
And
Give that love back to him. So so for the for the young man old man
And everybody in between that has never actually
Opened their heart to God would would you lead that person in and the first step of what we like to remind is

(01:09:41):
To be the man you're created be you need to know your creator and the first step is is opening your heart to them
Would you mind leading the someone anyone?
Everybody that feels
This is their time to open up their heart to God is it giving them an opportunity to do that? Yeah when I came to the

(01:10:02):
Place where I was ready to open up my heart to God I didn't necessarily know is opening my heart
But I was begging for help
because
I was in such a dark place where I wanted my life to be over I wanted to sleep and never wake up and so
I got to that place where I was like, please help me

(01:10:25):
And that opened my heart a little bit and then once I
Started going to church learning what the Bible was saying that's when I found out that God is love
It says God actually is love not that just God loves us that he is love. So his very nature is love and so being a tough guy and
or trying trying to

(01:10:47):
portray a tough guy
All the time with the you know the heavy metal music and all that
I slowly by the Holy Spirit's help started to
Learn to be able to open my heart and then I wanted this love because it was like
I did so many drugs and drank so much alcohol over the years that

(01:11:09):
um
It was like I wanted to escape and
meeting God as and learning that God is love it started to
Fill that place the empty place of me that the drugs and alcohol were trying to fill and so it was like
Sometimes I describe it as the best high I ever felt it was God's love entering when I opened my heart

(01:11:35):
And so it's done spiritually
In Romans five, I think it says that God pours out a spirit into our heart. It's sorry
It says that God pours out his love into our heart by his Holy Spirit
And it's like a it's described by Jesus as a living water and so
He's just gonna get bold man. This is why we always tell people get bold and just be like Jesus

(01:11:58):
Yeah, this guy's saying some crazy stuff. He's saying that
You know that
There's a you have a Holy Spirit and you'll pour out your spirit and you become real and you'll open the eyes of the heart and you'll just
You'll totally give a new existence to to us. So I'm asking you to do the same for me. That's all you gotta say is like

(01:12:18):
Lord, I want to I want to lay down my life as it has been and I want you to forgive my sins and I want you to
Make me a brand new person. I want you to
Pour your your spirit that living water into my heart. I want you to open the eyes. I want you to
To help me see a new existence

(01:12:40):
You know just start asking boldly for what you want
And once you start learning the bible and says the bible isn't written
With the frame of mind when you read it
For what you can't have like when you're reading it you shouldn't be like oh, I can't have that because it says
It's not that it's supposed to be

(01:13:02):
uh a gift book and it tells you what who you are and what you can have so once you start learning the bible you start asking for that
The Lord I saw this in the bible whatever I want that
I want to know your presence that guy had an encounter with you. I want an encounter with you
Your your your Holy Spirit is filled into my heart fill my heart with that

(01:13:23):
I need this to be real. I don't want dead religion like just be so
so like
He says come boldly to the throne of grace god says come boldly so what that means is in prayer
Be bold for what you ask for him and don't ask him for a Mercedes
Ask him to know him

(01:13:44):
Yeah, I mean you can leave that for later
What you need to start with is ask God that you really want to know him and that he's in your life and that
He's gonna lead you
Speak to you through things in different ways and just it's invisible God and so it's a it's a
It's a tricky thing at first. It's a whole new life, you know

(01:14:06):
But it's the most adventurous life and you know what you never gets old yeah like 20 years
I've been doing I've been walking with Christ and um, I don't always
He know what he's saying correctly
But it's still just as exciting
It doesn't get old. It's called the new creation and
And the thing is the new never fades

(01:14:28):
This is the only thing you know how like you could buy a car and be excited for it smells great
Yeah, for everything fades you're loved for that car. It's like oh, that's old one day
When you meet Christ and give him your life as the only thing in existence that never fades
It gets ever yes and newer if that's possible

(01:14:49):
You're recreated
In fact you're right because he does such do things for your life as you go through
Trials tribulations setbacks blessings trials tribula. It's like crossing resurrection throughout your life
You're gonna go through pain and then resurrection pain resurrection
Yeah, love and death love and death love and death brother. Hey if you guys just followed

(01:15:15):
Brian's prayer there and that you've prayed God come into my heart. I need you right now
I open my heart to you. Please come in. I give you my life in Jesus name
Amen if you prayed that prayer for the first time. Hey man
We want to know about it. Please go to standupdood.com/stand

(01:15:38):
We want to help you grow in Christ. We're gonna give you free tools. It's our gift
To help you be and continue to walk and being the man that God has created you to be
Thank you, Brian. We love you and you're it's a great honor to have you here and I appreciate you
You too, man. Trim it. Great talk great talk. Amen. I love what you're doing and

(01:15:59):
Yeah, seeing your stuff like
Whatever long ago it was and seeing you're still doing it. So keep going man. You sir and you too. Yes. Yes
That was awesome. That was awesome
Now I'm left. I'm dead broken

(01:16:20):
[MUSIC]

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