Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
The strange doctor weird.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Good evening, Come in, won't you by? What's the matter?
Speaker 3 (00:25):
You seem a bit nervous, uh, pale and distraught. Perhaps
a story would help calm your nerves. Yes, uh, and
delightful little story about a dead man who acts just
as if he were alive, And I know you'll like it.
I call it he Woke Up Dead. My story He
(00:55):
Woke Up Dead begins with two men pacing back and
forth at the top of a high cliff overlooking the Pacific.
They are John Raymond and his brother Gregory, a gaunt
man in whose eyes gleams a fanatical fire.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
Gregory, the answer is no, you're asking for one hundred
thousand dollars from the Raymond Foundation to spend on fake
yogi's and swammies trying to get in touch with the dead.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
Well you're not getting it much, John.
Speaker 6 (01:24):
All my life I've been studying death and what is
in the life beyond, And now with just a little money,
I know I.
Speaker 5 (01:30):
Can penetrate its mystery.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
The Raymond foundahodn't be the laughing stock of the world
if it went in for such a crackpot idea.
Speaker 6 (01:37):
So you'll think I'm a crackpot. Well, when you die, John,
according to father's will, I'll be head of the Raymond Foundation.
Then you'll see, I'll turn the whole foundation into a
great research laboratory to study death.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
That will never be.
Speaker 4 (01:50):
I intend to have the courts change the will so
you'll never be head of the foundation.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Gregory, No, no, you can't. You're blocking a tremendously important
piece of work. Won't let you.
Speaker 4 (02:00):
So just what can you do about it?
Speaker 5 (02:02):
This, John, I can do this. I go down, Uncle Gregory.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
You say father had a dizzy spell and fell from
the cliff before you could catch him.
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Yes, Jake, it happened so fast.
Speaker 5 (02:22):
I could do nothing. Good.
Speaker 7 (02:23):
Father never got dizzy.
Speaker 5 (02:25):
His health was perfect. The groundkeeper says he saw you
push father off the cliff. Clas nonsense.
Speaker 6 (02:30):
I was trying to catch him, pull him back.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Jack.
Speaker 6 (02:32):
You know Uncle Gregory wouldn't do it.
Speaker 5 (02:34):
I'm not so sure, Susan. Now listen to me, both
of you.
Speaker 6 (02:37):
The colonel said your father died accidentally, and that closes
the matter.
Speaker 8 (02:41):
Not with me.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
It doesn't know.
Speaker 6 (02:42):
Well, I'm now head of the Raymond Foundation, and I'm
going to pour all the resources of the Foundation into
an effort to contact the dead.
Speaker 5 (02:49):
Right, that's insane.
Speaker 6 (02:51):
The Foundation scientists are the verge of a cure for cancer,
for tuberculosis.
Speaker 5 (02:55):
You can't stop that work.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Now, I can, and I will.
Speaker 5 (02:58):
Oh no, you won't. He'll stop you something how because
you did murder Tad.
Speaker 4 (03:02):
You killed him to get control of the Foundation for
your crazy schemes.
Speaker 6 (03:05):
Get out, Get out, both of you.
Speaker 5 (03:06):
Get out before.
Speaker 7 (03:09):
Jackie tripped on the rug, his head hid against the fireplace.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
Wait, see how badly is hurt jack What is it is?
Speaker 9 (03:20):
He?
Speaker 8 (03:21):
Is he dead?
Speaker 5 (03:23):
Yes, Susan.
Speaker 3 (03:25):
All his life, Uncle Gregor has been trying to find
out what happened when you die.
Speaker 5 (03:31):
Now now he's going to find out.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Uh, Doctor Weird, Before you give us the second half
of tonight's tale, can you tell me why you're called
doctor Easy.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
When people listen to this program, I show them how
to avoids such unhealthy things.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Is being murdered and.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Well somehow, Doctor I doubt whether that would cure anybody
of anything, especially a case of NERD. But I'd like
to tell the men in our audience how to cure
something that can be cured. It's old hat idis being
addicted to the same old weather beaten hat. The only
real remedy for old hat idis is to go out
and get yourself a good new hat or two or three. Now,
(04:18):
Adam hats are priced so sensibly only three forty five
to ten dollars, you'll easily be able to afford more
than one. Combining distinctively smart styles with fine quality materials
and craftsmanship, Adam hats are a truly outstanding value. You'll
find it more than worth your while to discard your
(04:39):
old headpiece for a brand new Adam hat or two
or three. Now back to doctor Weird.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
And now I'll continue my story. He woke up dead.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
When Gregory Raymond returned to consciousness alone in a great
dim room, the thick, cloying scent of flowers was heavy
in the air. Startled, he saw at the other end
of the room three coffins resting on trestles. One of
the coffins was banked with flowers, and tall candles burned
(05:17):
at either end of it. Dazed and bewildered, Gregory Raymond
strolled toward the three coffins.
Speaker 6 (05:24):
This room where am I stained glass windows.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
It's like a church. I was in this coffin with
all the flowers on it.
Speaker 6 (05:35):
Why the body in this coffin is mine? No, No,
it's impossible.
Speaker 5 (05:42):
I'm not dead. I can't be.
Speaker 9 (05:44):
You must be upset, mister. Most of us fear that
way at first.
Speaker 7 (05:50):
Yes we did, but it will pass soon.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Who are you turning?
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Gregory Raymond was astounded to see dim figures coming taught
him from the shadows. A man and a woman, both
very old. They smiled at him sympathetically.
Speaker 9 (06:08):
I I am Joshua Benching. This is my wife, Nellie.
These are our bodies I in these other two coffins.
Speaker 5 (06:17):
I I don't understand.
Speaker 9 (06:19):
Oh you will look here in this coffin. Uh see
it's my body, isn't it.
Speaker 5 (06:26):
It looks just like you. It is me? It it
the earthly me I mean.
Speaker 9 (06:32):
Oh, and now this one is Nellie.
Speaker 5 (06:37):
Uh.
Speaker 7 (06:37):
You mustn't be so upset. You'll soon be used to
the idea.
Speaker 5 (06:43):
We're we're really, did all three of us?
Speaker 9 (06:47):
Why, of course you died yesterday morning? You slipped and
fell and hit your head.
Speaker 5 (06:55):
Yes, y, yes, I remember.
Speaker 9 (06:58):
It's taken you until now to uh well, to become
aware of things again. Death is a great shock, you know.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
But where am I?
Speaker 2 (07:09):
What is this place?
Speaker 5 (07:10):
This is the.
Speaker 9 (07:11):
Mortuary chapel at the cemetery. They're becoming for your body
soon to bury it.
Speaker 7 (07:18):
Joshua and I were killed two nights ago in anautal accident,
but they aren't going to bury us until tomorrow.
Speaker 6 (07:26):
I've never dream death would be like this one. Why
I can still see and hear, I can breathe, my
heart's still beat.
Speaker 9 (07:34):
Oh not really, You're used to those things, so they
let you think there hasn't been much change until you've
had a chance to get over your shock.
Speaker 5 (07:43):
They who do you mean? The ones in charge?
Speaker 9 (07:46):
You'll know more about them soon that mister Benedict will
be coming for us, and I expect he'll take you
along too.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
Mister Benedict, who's he?
Speaker 2 (07:57):
The guide?
Speaker 7 (07:58):
He stopped by last night? Just tell us not to
worry and to wait for him here. He'll take us
on to to the place where we go next.
Speaker 6 (08:10):
I I see sh Chug's coming.
Speaker 9 (08:16):
Come back here out of the way.
Speaker 5 (08:20):
Four men and Jack and Susan.
Speaker 7 (08:22):
Oh, they've come to take your body away to bury it.
Speaker 6 (08:26):
All right, men, make it easy now, that's it all
lift together?
Speaker 5 (08:33):
No, No, they can't bury me. I'm not dead.
Speaker 6 (08:35):
I can't be Jack Susan, listen to me. It's Gregory,
your uncle Gregory.
Speaker 5 (08:42):
Thank god they didn't.
Speaker 7 (08:44):
Hear me, because you're dead. The dead can't communicate with
a living. It just isn't possible.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
But it must be.
Speaker 6 (08:53):
Oh, my life, I've worked to establish such communication. No, No,
I have so much to tell the world, the people
I've worked with. I must find some way to communicate
with him.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
I must, I must.
Speaker 9 (09:04):
Are you ready?
Speaker 5 (09:05):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (09:06):
Feeling better?
Speaker 5 (09:07):
Mister Raymond.
Speaker 7 (09:09):
This is mister Bennydict. He's come for us.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Yes, it is time.
Speaker 5 (09:15):
We must go, but I can't go.
Speaker 6 (09:18):
I've got to tell people, the people I work with.
Speaker 5 (09:21):
I worked so hard to find the truth.
Speaker 1 (09:23):
And no, no, I may not be. There can be
no communication.
Speaker 8 (09:29):
Now, mister Benson, missus Benson.
Speaker 5 (09:31):
Yes, it's time.
Speaker 9 (09:33):
Oh, yes, mister Bendydick, We're ready. But mister Raymond here
is coming with us, isn't he.
Speaker 5 (09:40):
It is impossible.
Speaker 8 (09:41):
He is doomed to stay here on earth.
Speaker 6 (09:44):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (09:45):
What are you saying?
Speaker 8 (09:46):
That is your punishment? He remain forever a spirit that
moves unseen and unheard among men. It is the punishment
of all who murder and die unrepentant and un confess.
Speaker 5 (10:01):
He he's a murderer.
Speaker 6 (10:04):
I can't believe it.
Speaker 1 (10:05):
That is not for me to say. Come, we must
be going.
Speaker 5 (10:09):
No, wait, you've got to take me with you.
Speaker 6 (10:11):
I can't stand it being here, seeing, hearing as if
I were alive and not able to make anybody see
or hear me. I have to go with you. I
have to find out what comes next. It may not be,
but you got to take me if I confess, If
I repent, we'll then make a difference.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
It may I cannot promise.
Speaker 6 (10:29):
Then I do confess.
Speaker 5 (10:30):
I kill my brother John. I pushed him off the cliff.
Speaker 6 (10:33):
I'm sorry now, but it seems so important then that
I just had to do it.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
You are confessing to your brother's murder.
Speaker 6 (10:40):
Yes, yes, I killed him, I admitted.
Speaker 9 (10:42):
Not take me with you.
Speaker 6 (10:43):
You can't leave me here.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
You can't, Raymond, listen to me.
Speaker 5 (10:46):
You want to arrest for murder, you firstand under arrest
for murder? What what you saying? I'm dead, We're all dead.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
You're not dead.
Speaker 5 (10:55):
You're very much alive, and you're under arrest.
Speaker 8 (10:57):
These two people are witnesses to your confession.
Speaker 4 (11:00):
Now come along with me.
Speaker 5 (11:00):
No, No, you can't arrest me. Don't you understand you
can't arrest a dead man and I'm dead?
Speaker 2 (11:17):
Was Gregory Raymond dead?
Speaker 3 (11:19):
How was he alive? Well, the doctor said he was alive.
For you see, when his nephew found it, the fall
had only knocked Gregory unconscious. A strange scheme came to him,
and with the aid of three coffins and three clever
wax dummies that looked exactly like corps, plus several excellent actors,
(11:40):
he really made his uncle Gregory believe he was dead.
In fact, Gregory became so convinced of it that when
they told him he was really alive, he wouldn't believe them.
To this day, nothing can convince him he isn't really dead.
It is probably the strange just punishment a murderer I
(12:02):
ever had, so I didn't know another man who would. Oh,
you have to go, Perhaps you'll drop in again soon.
Just look for the house on the other side of
the cemetery, the house of doctor Weird.