November 21, 2023 • 41 mins
Most of the stations aired two episodes each week, usually on the weekends and many times back to back.Many of the stories are based on Rod Serling's scripts from the original Twilight Zone series, and are slightly expanded and updated to reflect contemporary technology and trends and the lack of a visual component. In addition to adapting all of the original episodes aired on the TV series, the radio series has also adapted some Twilight Zone TV scripts which were never produced, scripts from other Serling TV productions, and new stories written especially for the radio series.
Taking Serling's role as narrator is Stacy Keach. Different Hollywood actors, such as Blair Underwood and Jim Caviezel, take the lead role in each radio drama. In addition, several stars who appeared on the original TV series, such as H.M. Wynant, Orson Bean and Morgan Brittany, appear, although purposely not in the roles they originated on television. The series features a full cast, music and sound effects and is produced in the flavor of classic radio dramas but using today's technology.
In addition to being an homage to the original Twilight Zone TV series, the radio dramas pay tribute to the era of classic radio drama, including allusions to radio dramas such as Gunsmoke, the presence of radio legend Stan Freberg in many episodes, and the sons (Stacy Keach, Ed Begley Jr.) of radio drama personalities Stacy Keach Sr. and Ed Begley as stars in the series.
Taking Serling's role as narrator is Stacy Keach. Different Hollywood actors, such as Blair Underwood and Jim Caviezel, take the lead role in each radio drama. In addition, several stars who appeared on the original TV series, such as H.M. Wynant, Orson Bean and Morgan Brittany, appear, although purposely not in the roles they originated on television. The series features a full cast, music and sound effects and is produced in the flavor of classic radio dramas but using today's technology.
In addition to being an homage to the original Twilight Zone TV series, the radio dramas pay tribute to the era of classic radio drama, including allusions to radio dramas such as Gunsmoke, the presence of radio legend Stan Freberg in many episodes, and the sons (Stacy Keach, Ed Begley Jr.) of radio drama personalities Stacy Keach Sr. and Ed Begley as stars in the series.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:09):
There is a fifth dimension beyond thatwhich is known to man. It is
a dimension as vast as space andas timeless as infinity. It is the
middle ground between light and shadow,and it lies between the pit of man's
fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination.
It is an area which we callthe twilight zone. Oh, what's the
(00:49):
matter, dear? Don't you hearit? Of course I hear it,
Walter. It's that nice janitor fixingthe pipes. Why don't you go on
reading your book until he's finished?And the one pray tell might be I'm
sure it won't be much longer.Then the radiator will get just as hot
as you want. It. Isn'tthat what you told it? Yes,
yes, I know what I toldthem. But why does he have to
(01:10):
pick so much noise? I'm sureI couldn't say. The decibel level in
this apartment is beyond human endurance.Well, I suppose it's what they have
to do with steam heating that sortof thing. Oh, what I really
don't understand is how you can sitby knitting away oblivious to this assault.
Did you see the new wool scarfI'm making? It should keep out absolutely
(01:33):
all the draft. Well, aninfernal pounding goes on and on it wait
till you try it on. Ipicked out your favorite colors. It's much
thicker than the other ones. Oh, if I live that long? You
wanted more heat? That's what yousaid. Well, now you'll have it.
And then something, Yes, Idid, I certainly did say that.
(01:56):
Won't that be nice? Op Spring'seternal? The question is at what
price? Are you sure you're comfortable? Darling? What? Oh? Certainly
I am just comfy, cozy.I'll fluff up the pillows. Did you
take your ask? When I'm onthe verge of being hospitalized for pneumonia,
Oh no, really, it's notthat bad. A heap of a janitor
(02:20):
out there is smashing my brain andruining my sleep. But you weren't sleeping.
You're reading five thousand common ailments andhow to treat them? Is it
an interesting book? First he triesto freeze me to death, and then
he tries to destroy my brain.Shall I plug in the vaporizer? That
helps something? It doesn't help atall. If it did, I wouldn't
be in this condition. Well Iwon't stand for it. Lie down,
(02:45):
Walter, No, I won't writelie down? How can I? If
I'm to die, at least it'sgoing to be in comfort and peace?
You there, mister right witness misterWalter Bettecker, age forty four, afraid
(03:07):
of the following death, disease,other people, germs, drafts, and
just about everything else. He hasone interest in life, and that's Walter
Bettecker. One preoccupation, the lifeand well being of Walter Bettecker. One
abiding concern about society that if WalterBettecker should happen to die, how will
(03:30):
it survive without him? But there'sone thing he hasn't asked himself yet,
and it's simply, this, whathappens if, despite all his precautions,
Walter Bettecker should happen to stumble notinto the grave, but into the Twilight
Zone. And now the Twilight Zoneand our story Escape Clause starring Mike Starr
(03:59):
with Stacy Keach as your narrator.I asked you a question. You want
more heat, don't you? That'snot the answer, So I'll ask you
again, oh much longer. Putit this way. In twenty minutes,
(04:25):
it'll be about one hundred and fivein here, hot enough to fry an
egg. That's good enough for you. Twenty minutes, you say, half
to hour upon hours you're clanking aroundin my living room while I'm on my
deathbed. I have to wait twentyminutes more. If you do diabetic and
(04:46):
you go where I think you're going, as far as the temperature is concerned,
you ain't going to be able totell the difference. You wait,
Get out, my pleasure? Areyou all right here? Quick? Fool?
(05:09):
Get the doctor you mean again?Is it diness in my chest?
It must be my heart? Andcome back to the bed. Call it
now. Tell him to hurry.I don't think I have much time.
(05:33):
We keep your mouth closed a fewmore seconds? All right? Open?
Please? There? Well, howbad is it? What does that mean?
Your temperature isn't bad at all?In fact, it's quite good.
(05:56):
The thermometer wasn't in my mouth longenough? Oh, I think it was.
I timed it exactly. I findthat hard to believe. You'd better
take it again. Why I employyou before it's too late? There would
be no point. You see,you have no temperature. What about my
vital signs? Blood pressure's fine,respiration and pulse paul normal? My throat
it's dry, and achy all thetime. Well, that's because it's so
(06:19):
hot in here. No sign ofinfection, throat clear, ears and nasal
passages clear. What about what aboutthe pains in my back and my sign?
Well what about them? And foursleepless nights in a row? Is
it for now? How about that? Well? What do you want me
to say? The truth? Theawful truth? I can take it.
(06:45):
The truth, mister Betteker, Well, the truth is that it's well,
go on, it's psychosomatic, touse the scientific term psychosomatic. You are
trying to tell me that I'm onlysick in my mind. That's my considered
opinion. And you're supposed to bea professional, mister Bettaker. May I
(07:10):
speak candidly? I insist, well, there is nothing wrong with you except
the ailments you manufacture for yourself manufacture? Is that what you think? Your
pains are imaginary? Your inability tosleep is a case of nerves, nothing
more. In short, mister Bettaker, you are a very healthy man.
This man calls himself a doctor fouryears pre med, four years medical school,
(07:35):
two years internship, two years residency. And what is he, I
ask you? What is he?A quack doctor? Oh? Hello,
missus? Bettaker, what's the prognosis? Rescue him? The man's an idiot,
Walter Darling, I beg, youdon't excite your son, don't whisper.
(07:56):
You're looking at half my troubles rightthere, doctor, This this awful
woman who runs around whispering all daylong to make me think I'm sick even
if I'm not. Oh, andI am. I'm lying here at death's
door, and who's ushering me out? A quack and a whispering woman without
a mind. Well, I'll calltomorrow, Missus Bettecker. Meanwhile, try
(08:20):
leaving the window up an inch orso let some fresh air in. There
will be no need to call.Just come on over with the death certificate
and fill it out. Oh,Walter, don't drench me with those crocodile
tears of yours. She'd be sohappy to get rid of me. I
just can't tell you goodbye, MissusBedeker. Take care of yourself. I'll
(08:41):
see you out. No need toshow me the way I know it by
now, doctor, how is herelief? Missus Bedecker, Your husband is
one of the healthiest patients I have. But he's I think most of the
time. Is he? He won'tlet me air out the house. He
(09:03):
says, for every cubic photo ofunfiltered air, there are eight million,
nine hundred thousand germs. Well,he's probably right, and he's just quit
his job, the fifth job he'squit since the first of the year.
He says, they make him workin a draft. Well, I suppose
I'm oversimplifying it when I say there'snothing wrong with him, because in a
sense, there really is. Thisconstant worrying about himself is an illness of
(09:26):
a sort. Has he always beenthis frightened a man? Ever since?
I can remember? When he wascourting me, he told me he was
in the final stages of TB andonly had a week to live. I
only married him because I felt sosorry for him. Oh, I don't
mean that was the only I thinkI understand. Do you? You see?
(09:46):
People change, sometimes for the betterand sometimes in ways that aren't entirely
healthy. We all assign blame.Your husband is taking it out in those
nearest him. It's not your fault, but it must be. He never
stops complaining. The problem isn't physical. He's getting older, so he sits
here spinning his wheels. He needsto get out do things, prove he's
(10:09):
still strong, that there's a placefor him in the world. Oh doctor,
I'll do what I can. I'msure you will. You already have.
It's up to him. Now.I'll give you a call tomorrow.
I don't think it would be abad idea if you took some vitamins yourself.
You look run down, missus bettegerI do just a little too pale.
(10:33):
There's a draft in the air,and I feel a coma coming on.
Yes, darling, I'll be rightin now. You remember about those
vitamins. Promise, I promise.Here's a prescription. Get some of these
items from the drugstof for yourself.Thank you, I will, You're very
kind. Goodbye, Missus Bettaker,goodbye. Did you say there's a draft
(10:58):
from where windows? But it's onlyopening inch freezing the air blasting entered the
room. I'll close it for you. Do you know how many germs live
in one cubic foot of air ethyl? I think I do. Hate million,
nine hundred thousand, that's how many. I know. You want me
(11:18):
gone, Walter, gone from yourlife, and that's why you leave windows
open all over the place. Butas a point of calmon human decency,
couldn't you find a way to doit more? Suddenly the doctor said you
needed air? He said it wasstuffy in here. Oh, the doctor
said, tell me one thing.Yes, what is going on between you
two? Nothing, Walter. Isaw the way he looked at you.
(11:39):
Huh. Now you are imagining things. What's that slip of paper in your
hand? What do you mean?Oh? Does it only give me?
Oh? Now I understand. Well, if you'll let me explain, when
did he give you this? Justnow before he left? If you'll listen,
I'm not sick, he says.But nonetheless, he gives you a
prescription for medicine for me. Nota thing wrong with me, he says.
(12:01):
But while I lie here helpless,he's out there telling you that I've
got a life expectancy of twenty minutes. She said, nothing of the sort.
Don't deny it, Ethel. Ismelled the collusion the moment he left
the room. Now I suppose he'smaking time with you behind my back.
The two of you can hardly waitfor me to expire. What a great
day that will be. But justremember it will be on your conscience,
(12:28):
yours, and that that quacks.The prescription was for vitamins, Walter,
Not for you, for me,vitamins for you. I lie here while
the life seeps out of me,and that charlottean prescribes vitamins for you.
What has it done for me?Not a nil? A big fat goose
(12:50):
egg. That's what he comes wheneveryou call. He's very interested in your
condition, very interested. Oh isn'tthat nice? I'm dying and he gives
her vitamins. Sit, I'll turnon the vaporizer. Never mind, go
on, get out of here,Leave me to die in peace, all
(13:13):
right, Walter? What I meant? I'll let you alone so you can
take a little nap. Then maybeyou'll feel better. I can't not.
Why does a man have to die? Anyway? I'm sure you're not dying?
Oh are you? I asked youa question at them. Why does
(13:35):
a man have to die? Idon't know, Walter. The world goes
on for millions and millions of years. And how long is a man's life
as much a pinch, a drop, a microscopic fragment. Why can't a
man live five hundred years or athousand years? Why does he have to
die almost the moment he's born?I told you, I don't know,
(13:56):
dear, No, you wouldn't goon, get out of here, Yes,
dear, I have to take myown pulse, give myself a check
up. A doctor couldn't care lessm my sinuses. Let's moved from my
(14:20):
chest to my sinuses. After that'llbe my brain, and then puff as
if I never existed at all?What's the point? The point? Indeed,
it's a crime for a man tolive such a short span of years,
a crime. What I wouldn't give, What I wouldn't give to live
a decent number of years? Twohundred, three hundred? Why not five
(14:43):
or six hundred? Yes, whynot worth a thousand? What a miserable
thing to contemplate a handful of yearsand then eternity in a casket down under
the ground, the dark, coldground, with worms here of course,
words and bacteria in the soil,and all manner of filth and decomposition,
(15:07):
toxic waste. Who you, Cadwalader, is the name and immortalities of my
game? Your name is what Cadwalader? At least that's the one I'm using
(15:30):
this month? Rolls off the tongue, don't you think? How did you
get into my bedroom? Let mesee through the mirror, that would be
a nice touch. Or through thewalls. Hmmm, two prosaic. Look
here, The truth is, I'venever been gone. I've been in here
for some time. I must havea fever. I'm hallucinating, not at
(15:52):
all. I've merely chosen to revealmyself in order to tell you that I
subscribe holy to you, mister Bettecker, I mean holy, delighted to hear
it. I'll be brief, misterBetecker. You look like a man with
a nose for a bargain. I'dlike to make a proposition to you.
(16:14):
What kind of proposition Each of ushas something to the other wants, and
that seems a relatively solid basis fora bargain. Do we indeed? What
in the world do you have thatI could possibly want? Oh? Many
things, mister Bedecker, you'd besurprised, Many things, varied and delightful.
Oh what do I have that couldremotely interest you? Actually? A
(16:38):
minor item, minor, extremely areyou sure? Smaller than minor? Insignificant,
of no importance whatsoever, absolutely none, microscopic team seawings. Did you
say your name was? What's ina name? Mister Betecker? Just a
question of semantics. After all,language a stretch of words. For example,
(17:00):
what is it you want? Canyou put it into words? I
think you already know you want?An extended lifespan? Does in everyone a
few hundred years to play around with? Some people would call it immortality of
the sort? But why give itthat kind of description, Why make it
sound so imposing? What would youcall it? Then? Let's call it?
(17:23):
Let's call it some additional free time? After all, what are a
few hundred years in the grand scheme? Or a few thousand, a few
thousand or five thousand or ten thousand. What's the difference? The world will
go on add infinitum. So what'sa few thousand years more or less?
(17:45):
Give or take? Add or subtract. And this little item I'm to give
you an exchange? Or what dowe call that? What do we call
it? That's a linguistic conundrum.We could call it a little piece of
yourn, a little crumb off thecrust of your structure, a fragment of
(18:07):
an atom, so to speak,from your being or a soul or whatever.
After all, what is it?And when you're gone thousands of years?
Hence, what will you need it? For practically speaking, Yeah,
yes, you're the devil. What'sin a name? I'm at your service,
(18:33):
good lord? How about it,mister Bedecker? Why not? That
must be a good reason. Thatmust be You deed me over your soul
called soul, and I'd give youimmortality, life everlasting, or as long
as you want it to be everlasting, and indestructibility, mister Bedecker, complete
and total indestructibility. Nothing can hurtyou ever. Now that part's fun.
(19:00):
Let me tell you. Nothing canhurt me and I live forever? Why
not? Certainly forever? Again,mister Bettecker just turns and everything's relative for
you, it's forever for me.So walk around the block. But we're
(19:21):
both satisfied. Think about it,Oh I am. I am thinking about
it. To be without fear ofdying, to be indestructible, invincible,
not to have to worry about disease, accidents, pestilence, war, famine,
anything, Governments and institutions disintegrate,people perish. But Walter Bettecker goes
(19:48):
on and on. Walter Beteer goeson and on, the ultimate dream,
is it not, mister Cadwater,how about this soul? You say,
I won't miss it. You'll neverknow it's gone. And you say,
I'll go on and on quite unableto succumb quite, No tricks, no
(20:14):
hidden clauses. I'll just live aslong as I want to live. Is
that it? That's it, That'sprecisely it. How about my appearance,
I'm afraid I can't do much aboutthat. Oh, I see, what
do you mean? You should lookpretty much the same, But in five
(20:36):
hundred years I don't want to looklike any dried up old prune. Oh,
mister Bedeker. You drive a meanbargain, a most difficult bargain.
But you'll find me a cooperative man. All right, you win. We'll
throw that into the bargain. Sayit. Whatever aging takes place in your
features will be more or less imperceptible. Mister Cadwalader, I believe we're close
(21:03):
to making a deal. Mister Bedecker. You'll never regret this, not to
your dying day. Hey, whichby rights should not be for several thousand
years. You'd better say that thereis something. Ah, now, it
comes out for your benefit, Iassure you. Where did you get that?
(21:26):
The contract? Oh? One alwaysseems to turn up when it's needed.
Let's see Article ninety three right here. What about it? It's in
the nature of an escape clause.Read it to me, your escape clause,
whereas the party of the first partupon due notification of the party of
the second part, and so onand so forth. Though on I want
(21:49):
to hear it, well, I'lljust give it to your thumbnail. It's
simply that if you get tired ofliving, mister Bettecker, you can exercise
the clause by calling on me andrequesting your my What Oh, there goes
the embarrassing terminology again. Shall wesay you demise, at which point I
(22:11):
will personally see to it that youare given a rapid and uncomplicated, how
to put it, departure. Ican assure you, mister Cadwalader, that
I'm not the sort of man tokill the goose that lays the golden egg.
I'm much relieved to hear that.When you talk immortality to me,
brother, I mean mortality. IndubitablyYou're going to have a long, long
(22:36):
wait, mister Bedecker. Nothing willplease me more. And I think we've
got yes a deal. No furtherqualifications, none that I can think of,
No if ends or butts, none, whatsoever, absolutely positively done.
No fires in here, please,only a small one to heat up my
(22:57):
seal my car. Two. She'sa word? Do I get a copy?
This is your copy? Where's yours? Already on file in a very
safe place. If you say so, you sure keep it hot here.
Mm hmmm. Quirk of mind.I think the wording seems to be an
(23:21):
order, Cadwalader? Where did yougo? Walter? Did you call for
me? What? Oh? No, no, no, I was only
only what dear, I'm talking tomyself, Not that I make a habit
of it, mind you? Whatare those papers? Not that I mean?
I was just looking over my lifeinsurance policy whatever, for to be
(23:45):
sure you're you're protected if anything shouldhappen ever to me, that is,
don't be silly. Your health's goingto improve. It's already improved. Hit
me what me as hard as youcan in the stomach or anywhere else you
like, anywhere at all. Butwhy I want you to see how strong
(24:08):
I am, strong as a bull, as a bulder, and is indestructible.
Ten bowls one hundred, Walter,you're not yourself. Come sit with
me in the other room. It'swarmer there. The radiators going full force?
Is it you see for yourself?Yes? I think I will watch
(24:29):
this. What are you doing?Don't touch it? See what I mean?
Walter? Your hands are burning?No they're not. That's just it
Ethel. They're smoking, yes,but they're not burned at all. Oh,
it's a bandages. Sit down.What do you keep my pills?
Which ones? All of them?Every last one over here on the tray?
Give it to me. What areyou doing, Walter the window?
(24:52):
Don't throw them out? I begyou all your ragication? Why not?
What's the difference? Now, mydear, I'd like to introduce you to
someone. What are you talking about? Me? The new Walter? Better
girl? Get your paper boy rescuefrom Well Lives to tell about it?
(25:22):
All the latest news right here.Let me see that, sure, mister?
Two bits a little boy huh yeah, the one that fell in the
hole. They got him out alive. Ain't that something? That's something?
All right? A ten year oldboy and is on the front page of
every newspaper. He was down therefor eighteen hours, can you believe it?
(25:44):
And everybody thought he was a goner. It's amazing, is what it
is. All the news stories inthe world. This little nobody makes the
headlines. You think that's amazing,Wait right here, I'll show you amazing.
Hey, where are you going?Mister? You only twenty five cents?
Watch this? Oh? Watch whereyou're going? Hey, buddy,
(26:07):
I must get to the corner.Some people are so rude. I don't
want to miss the crosstown. Waityour turn? Do you mind? Look
out? Get back on the curve. There's a bus. Fum me that
man stop. I couldn't stop.He ran right out in front of the
(26:30):
bus. I saw the whole thing. That guy must be Look he's getting
you out. Hey, pal,how'd you do that? To? What?
Are are you? Okay? We'llsay I am new idiot. I
can't believe it. I didn't evensee you. Is there a photographer in
the crowd? By any chance?You better lay down. The ambulance is
coming. Why would I want togo to a hospital. There's nothing wrong
(26:52):
with me, not a thing.Just your tiet tracks on the front of
my suit. Just the same.Take it easy, Get some X rays
and I'll fill out next in report. Don't bother. Just contact your claims
adjuster. The name's Bettaker. Canyou remember that? Walter Betteker. It
don't make sense. I could havesworn I ran over you. Oh you
(27:14):
did? Then? How come youcan walk? As they used to say?
You ain't seen nothing yet? Onesurvivor, Walter Betteker. By Now
these words should be familiar. You'veheard them before on the eyeball news,
(27:37):
and if the past is any indication, you'll hear them again and again.
It started when he was hit bya bus, then a car, and
finally a subway train. But thatwasn't enough for Walter Bettecker, the man
who's luck never runs out after anexplosion at a construction site, what else
could happen? Last week's plane crashkilled twenty three people, but not miss
(28:00):
Bettaker. He's certified as the unluckiestman alive. And the most is that
you, Walter. He's all right, ma'am, aren't you? Mister Bettacker?
You're all right. When you didn'tcome home, I was worried.
Uh, this is my wife.Wait in the other room, dear,
are you sure I can make yousome hot tea? At your friend?
He's no friend, he's a claimsadjuster. In the other room, ethyl,
(28:25):
now, yes, dear, youwant to sign this now? Mister
Betaker, five thousand dollars. Isthat all for falling down an elevator shaft?
Well, considering that you're not evenscratched, mister Benecker, I think
the company's being very fair. Justkeep your mouth shut, will you.
(28:45):
I'll sign it just to be donewith you, and can I expect to
check by tomorrow first thing in themorning by a special messenger. Just sign
here, leaves all claims receipt ofsome and the FIZ company. All right,
very good, sir, very verygood. I'll show myself out.
(29:11):
Hello Steve, Hey Jack, whatare you? Huh? You too?
Yeah? The subway accident elevator chaftshere right? You out? You and
so long Steve, Yeah, seeyou jackah my check. I presume ten
thousand dollars mister Bettecker, if you'llsign right here for it. If you
(29:33):
insist fourteen accidents more than anyone shouldhave to bear, now, wouldn't you
think that there would be an elementof thrill and fourteen accidents? I'd appreciate
it if you'd step away from thewindow, Walter, it's open, you
(29:55):
know, fourteen accidents in which youknow nothing can happen to you. I
guess so dear, Well, it'sa fact. There should be an excitement
to this sort of thing. Well, there isn't. It's dull. It's
absolutely without the remotest bit of excitement. In short, I'm bored stiff with
it, Walter, Dear, youshould count your blessings. After all,
(30:18):
there is the money, and youshould shut your mouth. You look for
all the world like a small graymouse waiting for a piece of cheese.
Walter, you can be so terriblycruel Heath the police. I'm thinking,
I swear he's cheated me somehow.I don't know exactly. What are you
talking about? Who? Mortal?Schmortal? What's the good of it?
(30:41):
When there aren't any more kicks,any more thrills? And even to let
a man know he's alive? Walter, do you feel all right? At
least when I was concerned about myhealth, there was an element of risk
of danger. I mean, ofcourse, that's it. What is have
we got any What for did youcut yourself? Do we? I suppose
(31:04):
in the medicine cabinet, get itnow and rubbing alcohol and ammonia, Walter,
I'll get it. You find mea drinking glass, a large one.
There's one right there. I mixedthem all together like so and stir
them up. Wait and drink it. Oh ah, sit down, I'll
(31:36):
call the doctor. You see whatI just drank should kill a dozen men.
To me, it tastes like lemonade. Walter, Yes, what's this
all about? You really want toknow? All right, I'll tell you
in a word, I am immortal, Walter, don't joke like that.
It's true. I made a pactwith a guy named Cudwalader who's given me
(31:59):
immortal, the end indestructibility in exchangefor my soul, your soul. More
succinctly than that, I couldn't putit. Why don't you sit down,
I'll make some tea and then we'llcall the doctor. You will not make
tea, and you will not callthe doctor. Why not? If you
had any imagination at all, youcould tell me what there is I might
(32:21):
do to get a little excitement outof it. All. I'd been in
subway crashes, bus accidents, majorfires, disasters one after another, and
now I even drank poison laughing.You know what I've been thinking. I've
been thinking I'll go up on theroof and I'll throw myself down the lightwheel
smack dab through the lightwell fourteen storiesdown, just for the sheer experience of
(32:45):
it. Oh, Walter Darling,please, Ethel Darling, shut your mouth
and get out of my way.Please please, Walter, please, Darling,
Ethel go drown on a tub andleave me alone. I'm going headfirst
(33:07):
down the lightwell. Get out ofmy way, Walter, will you get
out of Ethel? Be careful.I wonder what that felt like. Operator.
(33:34):
Get me the police, please immediately. It's an emergency. Hello,
is this a police station? Thisis Walter Bedeker, eleven North seventh Street.
That's right, Apartment fourteen B.Will you please come over here right
away? No, no trouble.I just killed my wife. That's right.
Yes, I'll stay right here.Goodbye. Now this is going to
(33:57):
be an experience. Hey, Bettaker, you got a visitor? Cooper Legal
beagal right in here, mister Cooper. No longer than fifteen minutes. Please?
(34:23):
How are you holding up? Aswell as can be expected? Prisons
are boring places, you know,very very boring? In you? How
am I? I'm miserable, misterBetteker, and I've been miserable since I
took your case. I've had toughclients before, but nobody like you.
He really, what disturbs you,what disturbs me is that, for five
(34:43):
days in that courtroom, you've actedlike a man desperate to get himself convicted.
Oh whatever would make you think that? When the prosecuting attorney cross examines
you, you act like you're bettingon him to win the case. The
truth will out now, Look,Betteker, Tomorrow's the last day of the
trial. There'll be the summing upand it'll go to the jury. And
as things stand now, you don'thave a chance in hell that effect.
(35:05):
That is a fact. Now tomorrow, this is what I want us to
do. Cooper, do me afavor. Will you put it away?
How's that? Bedeker? Didn't youget what I was trying to tell you?
You're about twelve hours away from theguilty vertical in charge of first degree
murder? Oh, what will thepenalty be? The penalty in this state
(35:31):
for first degree murder is death inthe electric chair, death in the electric
chair, Betaker. And if Iwere in California, what how would they
try to kill me? If Ilived in California, capital punishment there is
the gas chamber. But I don'tsee it. And in Kansas, in
Kansas, it's hanging. But I'mgonna tell you something better, you know,
(35:51):
mister Cooper. I'm gonna tell yousomething. The only thing they'll get
for their troubles if they try toelectrocute me is a high electricity bill.
Good night, mister Cooper. Seeyou in card God. I don't know,
Beteker. I just don't understand you. The psychiatrist says you're saying,
and you say you killed your wife, way down deep, I know you
(36:15):
didn't. So tomorrow, when Isum up for you, I'm gonna lead
from a terrible position, a positionof weakness, but I'll do the best
I can, mister Cooper. Reallydon't bother, mister Bettaker. You've been
(36:39):
tried and found guilty of murdering thefirst degree. Have you anything to say
before the court pronounces sentence upon you? Boo oh, I don't have anything
to say to You're on them,not nothing. Then the court sentences you
to imprisonment in the state penitentiary forthe rest of your natural life. I
(37:01):
knew we could do it, Beteker. I knew we could get you off
without the death penalty. If Ido say so, myself. I gave
that summation everything I had. Waita minute, does this mean that it
means that you're not going to theelectric chair. You've been given life instead.
You're a very fortunate man, misterBettaker. Life Did you say life?
(37:28):
Imprisonment? Oh? We need helphere, My client's fainted. Here's
(37:50):
your last meal, my last withus. You're going to the penitentiary tomorrow
morning, the penitentiary. So life. Look at it this way, mister
Betecker. What's life? Forty fortyfive years? You can do that standing
on your head. Life, that'sall forty five years? Maybe not even
(38:16):
that much, after all? Whatare a few hundred years in the grand
scheme? Or a few thousand orfive thousand or ten thousand? No,
no, no, no, misterBetecker. Yes about the escape clause?
(38:45):
Care to utilize it now? Yes, that's a wise man god thing.
Mister Betecker. You look like someonehaving a heart attack. Exactly like a
man having a heart attack. OhdaBetaker, you all right? No pulse
(39:17):
must have been his heart. He'sdead, poor devil. There's a saying
every man is put on earth condemnedto die. Time and method of execution
unknown. And perhaps this is asit should be. Case in point,
(39:38):
Walter Bettecker lately deceased, a littleman with such a yen to live,
that he was beaten by the devil, by his own deadly boredom, and
by his place in the scheme ofthings, including his position such as it
is or was in the Twilight Zone. Hi, this is Carla Mauri,
(40:07):
producer of the Twilight Zone Radio Dramas. I'd like to take a moment to
tell you about our official website attwilight Zone Radio dot com, where you'll
get the latest news and information onthese Twilight Zone Radio dramas. Plus,
at twilight Zone Radio dot com,you can digitally download three free episodes or
any of our episodes for only adollar ninety five each. In this age
(40:30):
of ever changing technology, we've decidedto make these episodes instantly available to you
by making the Twilight Zone Radio Dramasa digital download only series. This means
that this series will no longer beoffered on CD. The CD collections at
our website are now being offered whilesupplies last at buy one, get one
(40:51):
free, so be sure to getyour favorites before they're sold out. Be
sure to visit us often, andI'll see you in the Zone. Escape
Clause, starring Mike Starr with StacyKeach as your narrator, was written for
(41:12):
the Twilight Zone by Rod Serling andadapted for radio by Dennis Etchison. Heard
in the cast were Peggy Roter,Rich Kamenick, Doug James, Turk Muller,
Guy Burrill, Heath Corson, LarissaBorkowski, Natalia Red, Peter Devido,
John Starr, Carl Lamari, PaulPatch, and Lynn Foley. To
learn more about the Twilight Zone radiodramas and to obtain audio cassettes and CDs
(41:36):
of these programs, visit our websiteat twilight Zone radio dot com. This
copyrighted radio series is produced and directedby Karl Lamari and Roger Wolsky for Falcon
Fixture Group, Doug James Peaking
There is a fifth dimension beyond thatwhich is known to man. It is
a dimension as vast as space andas timeless as infinity. It is the
middle ground between light and shadow,and it lies between the pit of man's
fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination.
It is an area which we callthe twilight zone. Oh, what's the
(00:49):
matter, dear? Don't you hearit? Of course I hear it,
Walter. It's that nice janitor fixingthe pipes. Why don't you go on
reading your book until he's finished?And the one pray tell might be I'm
sure it won't be much longer.Then the radiator will get just as hot
as you want. It. Isn'tthat what you told it? Yes,
yes, I know what I toldthem. But why does he have to
(01:10):
pick so much noise? I'm sureI couldn't say. The decibel level in
this apartment is beyond human endurance.Well, I suppose it's what they have
to do with steam heating that sortof thing. Oh, what I really
don't understand is how you can sitby knitting away oblivious to this assault.
Did you see the new wool scarfI'm making? It should keep out absolutely
(01:33):
all the draft. Well, aninfernal pounding goes on and on it wait
till you try it on. Ipicked out your favorite colors. It's much
thicker than the other ones. Oh, if I live that long? You
wanted more heat? That's what yousaid. Well, now you'll have it.
And then something, Yes, Idid, I certainly did say that.
(01:56):
Won't that be nice? Op Spring'seternal? The question is at what
price? Are you sure you're comfortable? Darling? What? Oh? Certainly
I am just comfy, cozy.I'll fluff up the pillows. Did you
take your ask? When I'm onthe verge of being hospitalized for pneumonia,
Oh no, really, it's notthat bad. A heap of a janitor
(02:20):
out there is smashing my brain andruining my sleep. But you weren't sleeping.
You're reading five thousand common ailments andhow to treat them? Is it
an interesting book? First he triesto freeze me to death, and then
he tries to destroy my brain.Shall I plug in the vaporizer? That
helps something? It doesn't help atall. If it did, I wouldn't
be in this condition. Well Iwon't stand for it. Lie down,
(02:45):
Walter, No, I won't writelie down? How can I? If
I'm to die, at least it'sgoing to be in comfort and peace?
You there, mister right witness misterWalter Bettecker, age forty four, afraid
(03:07):
of the following death, disease,other people, germs, drafts, and
just about everything else. He hasone interest in life, and that's Walter
Bettecker. One preoccupation, the lifeand well being of Walter Bettecker. One
abiding concern about society that if WalterBettecker should happen to die, how will
(03:30):
it survive without him? But there'sone thing he hasn't asked himself yet,
and it's simply, this, whathappens if, despite all his precautions,
Walter Bettecker should happen to stumble notinto the grave, but into the Twilight
Zone. And now the Twilight Zoneand our story Escape Clause starring Mike Starr
(03:59):
with Stacy Keach as your narrator.I asked you a question. You want
more heat, don't you? That'snot the answer, So I'll ask you
again, oh much longer. Putit this way. In twenty minutes,
(04:25):
it'll be about one hundred and fivein here, hot enough to fry an
egg. That's good enough for you. Twenty minutes, you say, half
to hour upon hours you're clanking aroundin my living room while I'm on my
deathbed. I have to wait twentyminutes more. If you do diabetic and
(04:46):
you go where I think you're going, as far as the temperature is concerned,
you ain't going to be able totell the difference. You wait,
Get out, my pleasure? Areyou all right here? Quick? Fool?
(05:09):
Get the doctor you mean again?Is it diness in my chest?
It must be my heart? Andcome back to the bed. Call it
now. Tell him to hurry.I don't think I have much time.
(05:33):
We keep your mouth closed a fewmore seconds? All right? Open?
Please? There? Well, howbad is it? What does that mean?
Your temperature isn't bad at all?In fact, it's quite good.
(05:56):
The thermometer wasn't in my mouth longenough? Oh, I think it was.
I timed it exactly. I findthat hard to believe. You'd better
take it again. Why I employyou before it's too late? There would
be no point. You see,you have no temperature. What about my
vital signs? Blood pressure's fine,respiration and pulse paul normal? My throat
it's dry, and achy all thetime. Well, that's because it's so
(06:19):
hot in here. No sign ofinfection, throat clear, ears and nasal
passages clear. What about what aboutthe pains in my back and my sign?
Well what about them? And foursleepless nights in a row? Is
it for now? How about that? Well? What do you want me
to say? The truth? Theawful truth? I can take it.
(06:45):
The truth, mister Betteker, Well, the truth is that it's well,
go on, it's psychosomatic, touse the scientific term psychosomatic. You are
trying to tell me that I'm onlysick in my mind. That's my considered
opinion. And you're supposed to bea professional, mister Bettaker. May I
(07:10):
speak candidly? I insist, well, there is nothing wrong with you except
the ailments you manufacture for yourself manufacture? Is that what you think? Your
pains are imaginary? Your inability tosleep is a case of nerves, nothing
more. In short, mister Bettaker, you are a very healthy man.
This man calls himself a doctor fouryears pre med, four years medical school,
(07:35):
two years internship, two years residency. And what is he, I
ask you? What is he?A quack doctor? Oh? Hello,
missus? Bettaker, what's the prognosis? Rescue him? The man's an idiot,
Walter Darling, I beg, youdon't excite your son, don't whisper.
(07:56):
You're looking at half my troubles rightthere, doctor, This this awful
woman who runs around whispering all daylong to make me think I'm sick even
if I'm not. Oh, andI am. I'm lying here at death's
door, and who's ushering me out? A quack and a whispering woman without
a mind. Well, I'll calltomorrow, Missus Bettecker. Meanwhile, try
(08:20):
leaving the window up an inch orso let some fresh air in. There
will be no need to call.Just come on over with the death certificate
and fill it out. Oh,Walter, don't drench me with those crocodile
tears of yours. She'd be sohappy to get rid of me. I
just can't tell you goodbye, MissusBedeker. Take care of yourself. I'll
(08:41):
see you out. No need toshow me the way I know it by
now, doctor, how is herelief? Missus Bedecker, Your husband is
one of the healthiest patients I have. But he's I think most of the
time. Is he? He won'tlet me air out the house. He
(09:03):
says, for every cubic photo ofunfiltered air, there are eight million,
nine hundred thousand germs. Well,he's probably right, and he's just quit
his job, the fifth job he'squit since the first of the year.
He says, they make him workin a draft. Well, I suppose
I'm oversimplifying it when I say there'snothing wrong with him, because in a
sense, there really is. Thisconstant worrying about himself is an illness of
(09:26):
a sort. Has he always beenthis frightened a man? Ever since?
I can remember? When he wascourting me, he told me he was
in the final stages of TB andonly had a week to live. I
only married him because I felt sosorry for him. Oh, I don't
mean that was the only I thinkI understand. Do you? You see?
(09:46):
People change, sometimes for the betterand sometimes in ways that aren't entirely
healthy. We all assign blame.Your husband is taking it out in those
nearest him. It's not your fault, but it must be. He never
stops complaining. The problem isn't physical. He's getting older, so he sits
here spinning his wheels. He needsto get out do things, prove he's
(10:09):
still strong, that there's a placefor him in the world. Oh doctor,
I'll do what I can. I'msure you will. You already have.
It's up to him. Now.I'll give you a call tomorrow.
I don't think it would be abad idea if you took some vitamins yourself.
You look run down, missus bettegerI do just a little too pale.
(10:33):
There's a draft in the air,and I feel a coma coming on.
Yes, darling, I'll be rightin now. You remember about those
vitamins. Promise, I promise.Here's a prescription. Get some of these
items from the drugstof for yourself.Thank you, I will, You're very
kind. Goodbye, Missus Bettaker,goodbye. Did you say there's a draft
(10:58):
from where windows? But it's onlyopening inch freezing the air blasting entered the
room. I'll close it for you. Do you know how many germs live
in one cubic foot of air ethyl? I think I do. Hate million,
nine hundred thousand, that's how many. I know. You want me
(11:18):
gone, Walter, gone from yourlife, and that's why you leave windows
open all over the place. Butas a point of calmon human decency,
couldn't you find a way to doit more? Suddenly the doctor said you
needed air? He said it wasstuffy in here. Oh, the doctor
said, tell me one thing.Yes, what is going on between you
two? Nothing, Walter. Isaw the way he looked at you.
(11:39):
Huh. Now you are imagining things. What's that slip of paper in your
hand? What do you mean?Oh? Does it only give me?
Oh? Now I understand. Well, if you'll let me explain, when
did he give you this? Justnow before he left? If you'll listen,
I'm not sick, he says.But nonetheless, he gives you a
prescription for medicine for me. Nota thing wrong with me, he says.
(12:01):
But while I lie here helpless,he's out there telling you that I've
got a life expectancy of twenty minutes. She said, nothing of the sort.
Don't deny it, Ethel. Ismelled the collusion the moment he left
the room. Now I suppose he'smaking time with you behind my back.
The two of you can hardly waitfor me to expire. What a great
day that will be. But justremember it will be on your conscience,
(12:28):
yours, and that that quacks.The prescription was for vitamins, Walter,
Not for you, for me,vitamins for you. I lie here while
the life seeps out of me,and that charlottean prescribes vitamins for you.
What has it done for me?Not a nil? A big fat goose
(12:50):
egg. That's what he comes wheneveryou call. He's very interested in your
condition, very interested. Oh isn'tthat nice? I'm dying and he gives
her vitamins. Sit, I'll turnon the vaporizer. Never mind, go
on, get out of here,Leave me to die in peace, all
(13:13):
right, Walter? What I meant? I'll let you alone so you can
take a little nap. Then maybeyou'll feel better. I can't not.
Why does a man have to die? Anyway? I'm sure you're not dying?
Oh are you? I asked youa question at them. Why does
(13:35):
a man have to die? Idon't know, Walter. The world goes
on for millions and millions of years. And how long is a man's life
as much a pinch, a drop, a microscopic fragment. Why can't a
man live five hundred years or athousand years? Why does he have to
die almost the moment he's born?I told you, I don't know,
(13:56):
dear, No, you wouldn't goon, get out of here, Yes,
dear, I have to take myown pulse, give myself a check
up. A doctor couldn't care lessm my sinuses. Let's moved from my
(14:20):
chest to my sinuses. After that'llbe my brain, and then puff as
if I never existed at all?What's the point? The point? Indeed,
it's a crime for a man tolive such a short span of years,
a crime. What I wouldn't give, What I wouldn't give to live
a decent number of years? Twohundred, three hundred? Why not five
(14:43):
or six hundred? Yes, whynot worth a thousand? What a miserable
thing to contemplate a handful of yearsand then eternity in a casket down under
the ground, the dark, coldground, with worms here of course,
words and bacteria in the soil,and all manner of filth and decomposition,
(15:07):
toxic waste. Who you, Cadwalader, is the name and immortalities of my
game? Your name is what Cadwalader? At least that's the one I'm using
(15:30):
this month? Rolls off the tongue, don't you think? How did you
get into my bedroom? Let mesee through the mirror, that would be
a nice touch. Or through thewalls. Hmmm, two prosaic. Look
here, The truth is, I'venever been gone. I've been in here
for some time. I must havea fever. I'm hallucinating, not at
(15:52):
all. I've merely chosen to revealmyself in order to tell you that I
subscribe holy to you, mister Bettecker, I mean holy, delighted to hear
it. I'll be brief, misterBetecker. You look like a man with
a nose for a bargain. I'dlike to make a proposition to you.
(16:14):
What kind of proposition Each of ushas something to the other wants, and
that seems a relatively solid basis fora bargain. Do we indeed? What
in the world do you have thatI could possibly want? Oh? Many
things, mister Bedecker, you'd besurprised, Many things, varied and delightful.
Oh what do I have that couldremotely interest you? Actually? A
(16:38):
minor item, minor, extremely areyou sure? Smaller than minor? Insignificant,
of no importance whatsoever, absolutely none, microscopic team seawings. Did you
say your name was? What's ina name? Mister Betecker? Just a
question of semantics. After all,language a stretch of words. For example,
(17:00):
what is it you want? Canyou put it into words? I
think you already know you want?An extended lifespan? Does in everyone a
few hundred years to play around with? Some people would call it immortality of
the sort? But why give itthat kind of description, Why make it
sound so imposing? What would youcall it? Then? Let's call it?
(17:23):
Let's call it some additional free time? After all, what are a
few hundred years in the grand scheme? Or a few thousand, a few
thousand or five thousand or ten thousand. What's the difference? The world will
go on add infinitum. So what'sa few thousand years more or less?
(17:45):
Give or take? Add or subtract. And this little item I'm to give
you an exchange? Or what dowe call that? What do we call
it? That's a linguistic conundrum.We could call it a little piece of
yourn, a little crumb off thecrust of your structure, a fragment of
(18:07):
an atom, so to speak,from your being or a soul or whatever.
After all, what is it?And when you're gone thousands of years?
Hence, what will you need it? For practically speaking, Yeah,
yes, you're the devil. What'sin a name? I'm at your service,
(18:33):
good lord? How about it,mister Bedecker? Why not? That
must be a good reason. Thatmust be You deed me over your soul
called soul, and I'd give youimmortality, life everlasting, or as long
as you want it to be everlasting, and indestructibility, mister Bedecker, complete
and total indestructibility. Nothing can hurtyou ever. Now that part's fun.
(19:00):
Let me tell you. Nothing canhurt me and I live forever? Why
not? Certainly forever? Again,mister Bettecker just turns and everything's relative for
you, it's forever for me.So walk around the block. But we're
(19:21):
both satisfied. Think about it,Oh I am. I am thinking about
it. To be without fear ofdying, to be indestructible, invincible,
not to have to worry about disease, accidents, pestilence, war, famine,
anything, Governments and institutions disintegrate,people perish. But Walter Bettecker goes
(19:48):
on and on. Walter Beteer goeson and on, the ultimate dream,
is it not, mister Cadwater,how about this soul? You say,
I won't miss it. You'll neverknow it's gone. And you say,
I'll go on and on quite unableto succumb quite, No tricks, no
(20:14):
hidden clauses. I'll just live aslong as I want to live. Is
that it? That's it, That'sprecisely it. How about my appearance,
I'm afraid I can't do much aboutthat. Oh, I see, what
do you mean? You should lookpretty much the same, But in five
(20:36):
hundred years I don't want to looklike any dried up old prune. Oh,
mister Bedeker. You drive a meanbargain, a most difficult bargain.
But you'll find me a cooperative man. All right, you win. We'll
throw that into the bargain. Sayit. Whatever aging takes place in your
features will be more or less imperceptible. Mister Cadwalader, I believe we're close
(21:03):
to making a deal. Mister Bedecker. You'll never regret this, not to
your dying day. Hey, whichby rights should not be for several thousand
years. You'd better say that thereis something. Ah, now, it
comes out for your benefit, Iassure you. Where did you get that?
(21:26):
The contract? Oh? One alwaysseems to turn up when it's needed.
Let's see Article ninety three right here. What about it? It's in
the nature of an escape clause.Read it to me, your escape clause,
whereas the party of the first partupon due notification of the party of
the second part, and so onand so forth. Though on I want
(21:49):
to hear it, well, I'lljust give it to your thumbnail. It's
simply that if you get tired ofliving, mister Bettecker, you can exercise
the clause by calling on me andrequesting your my What Oh, there goes
the embarrassing terminology again. Shall wesay you demise, at which point I
(22:11):
will personally see to it that youare given a rapid and uncomplicated, how
to put it, departure. Ican assure you, mister Cadwalader, that
I'm not the sort of man tokill the goose that lays the golden egg.
I'm much relieved to hear that.When you talk immortality to me,
brother, I mean mortality. IndubitablyYou're going to have a long, long
(22:36):
wait, mister Bedecker. Nothing willplease me more. And I think we've
got yes a deal. No furtherqualifications, none that I can think of,
No if ends or butts, none, whatsoever, absolutely positively done.
No fires in here, please,only a small one to heat up my
(22:57):
seal my car. Two. She'sa word? Do I get a copy?
This is your copy? Where's yours? Already on file in a very
safe place. If you say so, you sure keep it hot here.
Mm hmmm. Quirk of mind.I think the wording seems to be an
(23:21):
order, Cadwalader? Where did yougo? Walter? Did you call for
me? What? Oh? No, no, no, I was only
only what dear, I'm talking tomyself, Not that I make a habit
of it, mind you? Whatare those papers? Not that I mean?
I was just looking over my lifeinsurance policy whatever, for to be
(23:45):
sure you're you're protected if anything shouldhappen ever to me, that is,
don't be silly. Your health's goingto improve. It's already improved. Hit
me what me as hard as youcan in the stomach or anywhere else you
like, anywhere at all. Butwhy I want you to see how strong
(24:08):
I am, strong as a bull, as a bulder, and is indestructible.
Ten bowls one hundred, Walter,you're not yourself. Come sit with
me in the other room. It'swarmer there. The radiators going full force?
Is it you see for yourself?Yes? I think I will watch
(24:29):
this. What are you doing?Don't touch it? See what I mean?
Walter? Your hands are burning?No they're not. That's just it
Ethel. They're smoking, yes,but they're not burned at all. Oh,
it's a bandages. Sit down.What do you keep my pills?
Which ones? All of them?Every last one over here on the tray?
Give it to me. What areyou doing, Walter the window?
(24:52):
Don't throw them out? I begyou all your ragication? Why not?
What's the difference? Now, mydear, I'd like to introduce you to
someone. What are you talking about? Me? The new Walter? Better
girl? Get your paper boy rescuefrom Well Lives to tell about it?
(25:22):
All the latest news right here.Let me see that, sure, mister?
Two bits a little boy huh yeah, the one that fell in the
hole. They got him out alive. Ain't that something? That's something?
All right? A ten year oldboy and is on the front page of
every newspaper. He was down therefor eighteen hours, can you believe it?
(25:44):
And everybody thought he was a goner. It's amazing, is what it
is. All the news stories inthe world. This little nobody makes the
headlines. You think that's amazing,Wait right here, I'll show you amazing.
Hey, where are you going?Mister? You only twenty five cents?
Watch this? Oh? Watch whereyou're going? Hey, buddy,
(26:07):
I must get to the corner.Some people are so rude. I don't
want to miss the crosstown. Waityour turn? Do you mind? Look
out? Get back on the curve. There's a bus. Fum me that
man stop. I couldn't stop.He ran right out in front of the
(26:30):
bus. I saw the whole thing. That guy must be Look he's getting
you out. Hey, pal,how'd you do that? To? What?
Are are you? Okay? We'llsay I am new idiot. I
can't believe it. I didn't evensee you. Is there a photographer in
the crowd? By any chance?You better lay down. The ambulance is
coming. Why would I want togo to a hospital. There's nothing wrong
(26:52):
with me, not a thing.Just your tiet tracks on the front of
my suit. Just the same.Take it easy, Get some X rays
and I'll fill out next in report. Don't bother. Just contact your claims
adjuster. The name's Bettaker. Canyou remember that? Walter Betteker. It
don't make sense. I could havesworn I ran over you. Oh you
(27:14):
did? Then? How come youcan walk? As they used to say?
You ain't seen nothing yet? Onesurvivor, Walter Betteker. By Now
these words should be familiar. You'veheard them before on the eyeball news,
(27:37):
and if the past is any indication, you'll hear them again and again.
It started when he was hit bya bus, then a car, and
finally a subway train. But thatwasn't enough for Walter Bettecker, the man
who's luck never runs out after anexplosion at a construction site, what else
could happen? Last week's plane crashkilled twenty three people, but not miss
(28:00):
Bettaker. He's certified as the unluckiestman alive. And the most is that
you, Walter. He's all right, ma'am, aren't you? Mister Bettacker?
You're all right. When you didn'tcome home, I was worried.
Uh, this is my wife.Wait in the other room, dear,
are you sure I can make yousome hot tea? At your friend?
He's no friend, he's a claimsadjuster. In the other room, ethyl,
(28:25):
now, yes, dear, youwant to sign this now? Mister
Betaker, five thousand dollars. Isthat all for falling down an elevator shaft?
Well, considering that you're not evenscratched, mister Benecker, I think
the company's being very fair. Justkeep your mouth shut, will you.
(28:45):
I'll sign it just to be donewith you, and can I expect to
check by tomorrow first thing in themorning by a special messenger. Just sign
here, leaves all claims receipt ofsome and the FIZ company. All right,
very good, sir, very verygood. I'll show myself out.
(29:11):
Hello Steve, Hey Jack, whatare you? Huh? You too?
Yeah? The subway accident elevator chaftshere right? You out? You and
so long Steve, Yeah, seeyou jackah my check. I presume ten
thousand dollars mister Bettecker, if you'llsign right here for it. If you
(29:33):
insist fourteen accidents more than anyone shouldhave to bear, now, wouldn't you
think that there would be an elementof thrill and fourteen accidents? I'd appreciate
it if you'd step away from thewindow, Walter, it's open, you
(29:55):
know, fourteen accidents in which youknow nothing can happen to you. I
guess so dear, Well, it'sa fact. There should be an excitement
to this sort of thing. Well, there isn't. It's dull. It's
absolutely without the remotest bit of excitement. In short, I'm bored stiff with
it, Walter, Dear, youshould count your blessings. After all,
(30:18):
there is the money, and youshould shut your mouth. You look for
all the world like a small graymouse waiting for a piece of cheese.
Walter, you can be so terriblycruel Heath the police. I'm thinking,
I swear he's cheated me somehow.I don't know exactly. What are you
talking about? Who? Mortal?Schmortal? What's the good of it?
(30:41):
When there aren't any more kicks,any more thrills? And even to let
a man know he's alive? Walter, do you feel all right? At
least when I was concerned about myhealth, there was an element of risk
of danger. I mean, ofcourse, that's it. What is have
we got any What for did youcut yourself? Do we? I suppose
(31:04):
in the medicine cabinet, get itnow and rubbing alcohol and ammonia, Walter,
I'll get it. You find mea drinking glass, a large one.
There's one right there. I mixedthem all together like so and stir
them up. Wait and drink it. Oh ah, sit down, I'll
(31:36):
call the doctor. You see whatI just drank should kill a dozen men.
To me, it tastes like lemonade. Walter, Yes, what's this
all about? You really want toknow? All right, I'll tell you
in a word, I am immortal, Walter, don't joke like that.
It's true. I made a pactwith a guy named Cudwalader who's given me
(31:59):
immortal, the end indestructibility in exchangefor my soul, your soul. More
succinctly than that, I couldn't putit. Why don't you sit down,
I'll make some tea and then we'llcall the doctor. You will not make
tea, and you will not callthe doctor. Why not? If you
had any imagination at all, youcould tell me what there is I might
(32:21):
do to get a little excitement outof it. All. I'd been in
subway crashes, bus accidents, majorfires, disasters one after another, and
now I even drank poison laughing.You know what I've been thinking. I've
been thinking I'll go up on theroof and I'll throw myself down the lightwheel
smack dab through the lightwell fourteen storiesdown, just for the sheer experience of
(32:45):
it. Oh, Walter Darling,please, Ethel Darling, shut your mouth
and get out of my way.Please please, Walter, please, Darling,
Ethel go drown on a tub andleave me alone. I'm going headfirst
(33:07):
down the lightwell. Get out ofmy way, Walter, will you get
out of Ethel? Be careful.I wonder what that felt like. Operator.
(33:34):
Get me the police, please immediately. It's an emergency. Hello,
is this a police station? Thisis Walter Bedeker, eleven North seventh Street.
That's right, Apartment fourteen B.Will you please come over here right
away? No, no trouble.I just killed my wife. That's right.
Yes, I'll stay right here.Goodbye. Now this is going to
(33:57):
be an experience. Hey, Bettaker, you got a visitor? Cooper Legal
beagal right in here, mister Cooper. No longer than fifteen minutes. Please?
(34:23):
How are you holding up? Aswell as can be expected? Prisons
are boring places, you know,very very boring? In you? How
am I? I'm miserable, misterBetteker, and I've been miserable since I
took your case. I've had toughclients before, but nobody like you.
He really, what disturbs you,what disturbs me is that, for five
(34:43):
days in that courtroom, you've actedlike a man desperate to get himself convicted.
Oh whatever would make you think that? When the prosecuting attorney cross examines
you, you act like you're bettingon him to win the case. The
truth will out now, Look,Betteker, Tomorrow's the last day of the
trial. There'll be the summing upand it'll go to the jury. And
as things stand now, you don'thave a chance in hell that effect.
(35:05):
That is a fact. Now tomorrow, this is what I want us to
do. Cooper, do me afavor. Will you put it away?
How's that? Bedeker? Didn't youget what I was trying to tell you?
You're about twelve hours away from theguilty vertical in charge of first degree
murder? Oh, what will thepenalty be? The penalty in this state
(35:31):
for first degree murder is death inthe electric chair, death in the electric
chair, Betaker. And if Iwere in California, what how would they
try to kill me? If Ilived in California, capital punishment there is
the gas chamber. But I don'tsee it. And in Kansas, in
Kansas, it's hanging. But I'mgonna tell you something better, you know,
(35:51):
mister Cooper. I'm gonna tell yousomething. The only thing they'll get
for their troubles if they try toelectrocute me is a high electricity bill.
Good night, mister Cooper. Seeyou in card God. I don't know,
Beteker. I just don't understand you. The psychiatrist says you're saying,
and you say you killed your wife, way down deep, I know you
(36:15):
didn't. So tomorrow, when Isum up for you, I'm gonna lead
from a terrible position, a positionof weakness, but I'll do the best
I can, mister Cooper. Reallydon't bother, mister Bettaker. You've been
(36:39):
tried and found guilty of murdering thefirst degree. Have you anything to say
before the court pronounces sentence upon you? Boo oh, I don't have anything
to say to You're on them,not nothing. Then the court sentences you
to imprisonment in the state penitentiary forthe rest of your natural life. I
(37:01):
knew we could do it, Beteker. I knew we could get you off
without the death penalty. If Ido say so, myself. I gave
that summation everything I had. Waita minute, does this mean that it
means that you're not going to theelectric chair. You've been given life instead.
You're a very fortunate man, misterBettaker. Life Did you say life?
(37:28):
Imprisonment? Oh? We need helphere, My client's fainted. Here's
(37:50):
your last meal, my last withus. You're going to the penitentiary tomorrow
morning, the penitentiary. So life. Look at it this way, mister
Betecker. What's life? Forty fortyfive years? You can do that standing
on your head. Life, that'sall forty five years? Maybe not even
(38:16):
that much, after all? Whatare a few hundred years in the grand
scheme? Or a few thousand orfive thousand or ten thousand? No,
no, no, no, misterBetecker. Yes about the escape clause?
(38:45):
Care to utilize it now? Yes, that's a wise man god thing.
Mister Betecker. You look like someonehaving a heart attack. Exactly like a
man having a heart attack. OhdaBetaker, you all right? No pulse
(39:17):
must have been his heart. He'sdead, poor devil. There's a saying
every man is put on earth condemnedto die. Time and method of execution
unknown. And perhaps this is asit should be. Case in point,
(39:38):
Walter Bettecker lately deceased, a littleman with such a yen to live,
that he was beaten by the devil, by his own deadly boredom, and
by his place in the scheme ofthings, including his position such as it
is or was in the Twilight Zone. Hi, this is Carla Mauri,
(40:07):
producer of the Twilight Zone Radio Dramas. I'd like to take a moment to
tell you about our official website attwilight Zone Radio dot com, where you'll
get the latest news and information onthese Twilight Zone Radio dramas. Plus,
at twilight Zone Radio dot com,you can digitally download three free episodes or
any of our episodes for only adollar ninety five each. In this age
(40:30):
of ever changing technology, we've decidedto make these episodes instantly available to you
by making the Twilight Zone Radio Dramasa digital download only series. This means
that this series will no longer beoffered on CD. The CD collections at
our website are now being offered whilesupplies last at buy one, get one
(40:51):
free, so be sure to getyour favorites before they're sold out. Be
sure to visit us often, andI'll see you in the Zone. Escape
Clause, starring Mike Starr with StacyKeach as your narrator, was written for
(41:12):
the Twilight Zone by Rod Serling andadapted for radio by Dennis Etchison. Heard
in the cast were Peggy Roter,Rich Kamenick, Doug James, Turk Muller,
Guy Burrill, Heath Corson, LarissaBorkowski, Natalia Red, Peter Devido,
John Starr, Carl Lamari, PaulPatch, and Lynn Foley. To
learn more about the Twilight Zone radiodramas and to obtain audio cassettes and CDs
(41:36):
of these programs, visit our websiteat twilight Zone radio dot com. This
copyrighted radio series is produced and directedby Karl Lamari and Roger Wolsky for Falcon
Fixture Group, Doug James Peaking
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