The Weekly Humorist Podcast
The Satire Magazine. The Standard In American Immaturity. Welcome to the Weekly Humorist Podcast! Featuring audio articles from the pages of the Weekly Humorist. Curated picks from the editors you are sure to enjoy. Great for the illiterate and/or lazy fans! Tell your friends. Visit online at weeklyhumorist.com
Episodes
Air Bud Golf: Chip & Mutt
Air Bud Boxing: South-Paw
Air Bud NASCAR: Need for Breed
Air Bud Mixed Martial Arts: Ground-and-Hound
Air Bud Spelling Bee: Consonants & Growls
Air Bud Hide & Seek: You Can Run, But You Can't Raw-Hide
Air Bud Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Contest: A Wiener is Crowned
Air Bud Company Picnic: Pug-of-War
Air Bud Frisbee: A Sport That Dogs Actually Play
1st Commandment addendum: Thou shall not make me into graven imaginary (not to include bitcoin, NFTs, fake bibles, limited edition coins and plates, hats, shot glasses, and more to be amended at a later date).
2nd Commandment: Thou sh...
Kroger Grocery Haul After NEW Tariffs
LIVE: Floating Orb Hovers Above Chicago Bean
Alien Invasion or Elaborate Hoax? Zane & Maya Discuss While Cooking Chicken Alfredo
Mel Gibson's Message to Orb: "Get The Hell Out!" | FOX NEWS
What I Wished I Knew BEFORE I Learned The Orb Was a LIVING Person
"It's Similar To Your Human Eyeball" - Orb On The Slimy Membrane That Coats His Body
I Helped 1 Orb Gai...
2nd Base: Serenading an open wound.
3rd Base: Tea-bagging box set of Stargate: The Complete Series on blu ray.
4th Base: Warm coleslaw enema given by a guy cosplaying as Dean Koontz.
5th Base: Consensual glorfing.
6th Base: Ship In A Butthole (building a small replica of a 19th century schooner in one another's anal cavity).
7th Base: Making a snuff film with the Hamburger Helper mascot.
...
BOB (looking at a clock that reads 1:30 PM): Thank you all for making this emergency standup first thing in the morning. I know everyone has a busy day of folding paper planes and setting them on fire, but we are at Code Red after another d...
Wake up early and check Donald Trump's social media feeds to see if he's been mentioned. See that he has not, and, not that it matters, but Elon Musk has already been mentioned five times.
6:15am:
Walk his dog Atlas; promise not to eat Atlas like he ate his last dog.
6:30am:
Relax on well-worn couch while his wife Usha feeds and clothes her three young children.
7:00 am:
Celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day by searching all...
I'd like to say I'm proud of you and that, like bourbon, you've been through an aging process and your refinement has made me mature and earthy, with peaty undertones. Instead, I need to say that being drunk on leftover Christmas bourbon eggnog is no excuse for signing me up to be a better you.
When we went through the same charade last year, we agreed that in the future, the only New Year's res...
Hannibal Lecter famously said that "democracy is a slow process of stumbling to the right decision instead of going straight forward to the wrong one."
Well Hannibal, we did it. At long last, we have the freedom our esteemed forefathers promi...
Not Freaky At All Friday
When Vicki and her mother accidentally switch bodies, they both decide to accept their new identities and adopt the pronouns of Me and You.
World War TMZ
The f...
I only borrowed Liam Gallagher temporarily.
I'm simply keeping him away from his brother Noel Gallagher to ensure the Oasis tour happens.
Their Gen X fans need this reunion. This may be the last year we can stay awake late enough to go.
I'm trying to tell Liam Gallgher what I'm doing for him, for us. But he won't s...
Start by getting on Old Route 4. It's got another name on GPS, but GPS is worthless here because of the surrounding hillocks. You'll be on the road a good long while. If you pass the corn billboard, you've gone too far. Turn around and head back about 20 miles.
When you come to a traffic circle...
Hook up to metabo-chamber for at least seven cycles per ankh-coin.
Continue worship of The Manor's blood moon delegation.
Switch to baked from fried warlock discharge packets.
Enlist offspring in clan-wide contest of mental and physical dexterity.
Prepare for The Great Merging; check pantry for extra napkins and plastic cups in case of company.
Aw, here we go - do not get all defensive on me! I promise you're not the victim here. Look, I know you're not the only person who does this; honestly, it'd be so muc...
Clean-Cut
You have your shit together. This may be in the form of having a steady job, a tidy apartment, an Excel-sheet budget, or likely all three of these things. This pillar is often associated with the "Type A" personality*. You a...
9. 6
8. 1
7. 3
6. 10
5. 8
4. 9
3. 5
2. 7
1. 4
To coincide with his birthday, my newsletter unpacks the story of Jesus. Some say he's a myth, several denounce him as a misfit, others declare he's the messiah, and more still ask "But what exactly is myrrh?"
My ideal reader is you...
Pink Floyd: The Dark Side of the Moon Must Be the Only Place Where They Didn't Get to Hear This Record Fall in Love With It!
Michael Jackson: Bad? I Think You Mean Good, Mr. Jackson
Fleetwood Mac: The Rumours Are True: This is a Terrific Album!
Meat Loaf: Bat Out of Heaven, Actually
Creedence Clearwater Revival: Cosmo's HIT Factory
Eagles: Hotel Ca...
Your father's hiding place for his guns is the backpack you wear to school every day.
Your math tutor is part of a work-release program.
The only parental blocks on your computer are suicide prevention websites.
Rather than the Cub Scouts, your parents have you join the Crips.
Although they won't allow you to have a dog of your own, they do encourage you to stay out late and play with p...
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