Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in
the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please
visit LibriVox dot org. This recording is by Mark Smith
of Simpsonville, South Carolina. The Wind in the Willows by
Kenneth Grahame, Chapter eight Toad's Adventures. When Toad found himself
(00:28):
immured in a dank and noisome dungeon, and knew that
all the grim darkness of a medieval fortress lay between
him and the outer world of sunshine and well mettled
high roads, where he had lately been so happy, disporting
himself as if he had bought up every road in England.
He flung himself at full length on the floor, and
(00:50):
shed bitter tears, and abandoned himself to dark despair. This
is the end of everything, he said. At least it
is the end of the career of Toad, which is
the same thing, the popular and handsome Toad, the rich
and hospitable toad, the toad so free and careless and debonair.
(01:13):
How can I hope to be ever set at large again?
Who have been imprisoned so justly for stealing so handsome
a motor car in such an audacious manner, and for
such lurid and imaginative cheek bestowed upon such a number
of fat, red faced policemen. Stupid animal that I was.
(01:37):
Now I must languish in this dungeon till people who
were proud to say they knew me have forgotten the
very name of Toad. O wise badger, OH clever, intelligent
rat and sensible mole. What sound judgments? What a knowledge
of men in matters you possess, Oh, unhappy and worthsaken Toad.
(02:02):
With lamentations such as these, he passed his days and
nights for several weeks, refusing his meals or intermediate light refreshments.
Though the grim and ancient jailer, knowing that Toad's pockets
were well lined, frequently pointed out that many comforts and
indeed luxuries, could, by arrangement, be sent in at a
(02:24):
price from outside. Now. The jailer had a daughter, a
pleasant wench and good hearted, who assisted her father in
the lighter duties of his post. She was particularly fond
of animals, and, besides sir canary, whose cage hung on
a nail on the massive wall of the keep near by,
day to the great annoyance of prisoners, who relished an
(02:47):
after dinner nap and was shrouded in an addie macasser.
On the parlor table at night, she kept several piebald
mice and a restless, revolving squirrel. This kind hearted girl,
pitying the misery of Toad, said to her father one day, Father,
I can't bear to see that poor beast so unhappy
(03:09):
and getting so thin. You let me have the managing
of him, you know how fond of animals I am.
I'll make him eat from my hand and sit up
and do all sorts of things. Your father replied that
she could do what she liked with him. He was
tired of Toad and his sulks, and his airs and
(03:31):
his meanness. So that day she went on her errand
of mercy and knocked at the door of Toad's cell. Now,
cheer up, Toad, she said, coaxingly, on entering, and sit
up and dry your eyes, and be a sensible animal,
and do try and eat a bit of dinner. See,
(03:51):
I've brought you some of mine hot from the hoven.
It was bubble in squeak between two plates, and its
fragrance filled the narrow cell. The penetrating smell of cabbage
reached the nose of Toad as he lay prostrate in
his misery on the floor, and gave him the idea
for a moment that perhaps life was not such a
(04:13):
blank and desperate thing as he'd imagined. But still he
wailed and kicked with his legs and refused to be comforted.
So the wise girl retired for the time, but of
course a good deal of the smell of hot cabbage
remained behind, as it will do, and Toad, between his sobs,
(04:36):
sniffed and reflected, and gradually began to think new and
inspiring thoughts of chivalry and poetry, and deeds still to
be done, of broad meadows and cattle browsing in them,
raked by sun and wind, of kitchen gardens and straight
herb borders and warm snap dragon beset by bees, And
(04:58):
of the comforting clink of dishes set down on the
table at Toad Hall, and the scrape of chair legs
on the floor. As everyone pulled himself close up to
his work, the air of the narrow cell took a
rosy tinge. He began to think of his friends and
how they would surely be able to do something of lawyers,
(05:21):
and how they would have enjoyed his case, and what
an ass he had been not to get in a
few And lastly he thought of his own great cleverness
and resource, and all that he was capable of if
he only gave his great mind to it. And the
cure was almost complete when the girl returned some hours later.
(05:45):
She carried a tray with a cup of fragrant tea
steaming on it, and a plate piled up with very
hot buttered toast, cut thick, very brown on both sides,
with a butter running through the holes in it in
great golden drops, like honey from the honeycomb. The smell
of that buttered toast simply talked to Toad, and with
(06:09):
no uncertain voice, talked of warm kitchens, a breakfasts, on bright,
frosty mornings, of cozy parlor firesides, on winter evenings when
one's ramble was over, and slippered feet were propped on
the fender of the purring of contented cats and the
twitter of sleepy canaries. Toad sat up on end, once more,
(06:34):
dried his eyes, sipped his tea, and munched his toast,
and soon began talking freely about himself and the house
he lived in, and his doings there, and how important
he was, and what a lot his friends thought of him.
The jailer's daughter saw that the topic was doing him
(06:55):
as much good as the tea, and indeed it was,
and she encouraged him to go on. Tell me about
toad Hall. She said, it sounds beautiful. Toad Hall said.
The toad proudly is an eligible, self contained gentleman's residence,
very unique, dating in part from the fourteenth century, but
(07:17):
replete with every modern convenience, up to date sanitation, five
minutes from church, post office, and golf links, suitable for
bless the animal, said the girl, laughing, I don't want
to take it. Tell me something real about it, but
first wait till I fetch you some more tea and toast.
(07:38):
She tripped away and presently returned with a fresh tray
full and Toad, pitching in to the toast with avidity,
his spirits quite restored to the usual level, told her
about the boat house and the fish pond, and the
old walled kitchen garden, and about the pig styes and
(07:59):
the stables, and the pigeon house and the hen house.
And about the dairy and the wash house, and the
china cupboards and the linen presses. Oh, she liked that
bit especially, And about the banqueting hall and the fun
they had there when the other animals were gathered round
the table and Toad was at his best, singing songs,
(08:23):
telling stories, carrying on generally. Then she wanted to know
about his animal friends, and was very interested in all
he had to tell her about them, and how they
lived and what they did to pass their time. Of course,
she did not say she was fond of animals as pets,
(08:44):
because she had the sense to see that Toad would
be extremely offended when she said good night, having filled
his water jug and shaken up his straw. For him,
Toad was very much the same sanguine, self satisfied animal
that he had been of old. He sang a little
song or two of the sort he used to sing
(09:04):
at his dinner parties, curled himself up in the straw,
and had an excellent night's rest and the pleasantest of dreams.
They had many interesting talks together after that, as the
dreary days went on, and the jailer's daughter grew very
sorry for Toad and thought it was a great shame
(09:27):
that a poor little animal should be locked up in
prison for what seemed to her a very trivial offense. Toad,
of course, and his vanity, thought that her interest in
him proceeded from a growing tenderness, and he could not
help half regretting that the social gulf between them was
so very wide, for she was a comely lass and
(09:49):
evidently admired him very much. One morning, the girl was
very thoughtful and answered at random, and did not seem
to to be paying proper attention to his witty sayings
and sparkling comments Toad. She said, presently, just listen, please,
(10:10):
I have an aunt who is a washerwoman. There there,
said Toad, graciously, inaffably, never mind, think no more about it.
I have several aunts who ought to be washerwomen. To
be quiet a minute, Toad said the girl. You talk
too much. That's your chief fault. And I'm trying to think,
(10:31):
and you hurt my head. Well, as I said, I
have an aunt who is a washerwoman. She does the
washing for all the prisoners in this castle. We try
to keep any paying business of that sort in the family.
You understand. She takes out the washing on Monday morning
and brings it in on Friday evening. This is a Thursday. Now,
(10:57):
this is what occurs to me. Very rich, at least
you're always telling me so, and she's very poor. A
few pounds wouldn't make any difference to you, and it
would mean a lot to her. Now, I think if
she were properly approached squared, I believe is the word
(11:17):
you animals use, you could come to some arrangement by
which she would let you have her dress and bonnet
and so on, and you could escape from the castle
as the official washerwoman. You're very alike in many respects,
particularly about the figure. We're not, said the toad in
(11:38):
a huff. I have a very elegant figure for what
I am, so has my aunt, replied the girl, for
what she is. But have it your own way, you horrid, proud,
ungrateful animal, when I'm sorry for you in trying to
help you. Yes, yes, that's all right, thank you very much, indeed,
(11:59):
said the toad herd. But look here, you surely wouldn't
have mister toad of toad Hall going about the country
disguised as a washerwoman. Then you can stop here, as
a toad replied the girl with much spirit. I suppose
you want to go off in a coach and four
(12:20):
honest Toad was always ready to admit himself in the wrong.
You are a good, kind, clever girl, he said, and
I am indeed a proud and stupid Toad. Introduce me
to your worthy aunt, if you will be so kind,
and I have no doubt that the excellent lady and
I shall be able to arrange terms satisfactory to both parties.
(12:46):
Next evening, the girl ushered her aunt into Toad's cell,
bearing his week's washing, pinned up in a towel. The
old lady had been prepared beforehand for the interview, and
the sight of certain gold sovereigns that Toad had thoughtfully
placed on the table in full view practically completed the
matter and left little further to discuss. In return for
(13:10):
his cash, Toad received a cotton print gown, an apron
a shawl, and a rusty black bonnet, and the only
stipulation the old lady made being that she should be
gagged and bound and dumped down in a corner. By
this not very convincing artifice, she explained, aided by picturesque
(13:32):
fiction which she could supply herself. She hoped to retain
her situation in spite of the suspicious appearance of things.
Toad was delighted with the suggestion it would enable him
to leave the prison in some style, and with his
reputation for being a desperate and dangerous fellow untarnished, and
(13:53):
he readily helped the jailer's daughter to make her aunt
appear as much as possible, the victim of circumstance over
which she had no control. Now it's your turn, Toad,
said the girl. Take off that coat and waistcoat of yours.
You're fat enough as it is. Shaking with laughter, she
proceeded to hook and eye him into the cotton print gown,
(14:17):
arranged the shawl with a professional fold, and tied the
strings of the rusty bonnet under his chin. You're the
very image of her, she giggled. Only I'm sure you
never looked half so respectable in all your life before.
Now good bye, Toad, and good luck. Go straight down
the way you came up. And if anyone says anything
(14:39):
to you, as they probably will, being but men, you
can chaff back a bit, of course. But remember you're
a widow woman quite alone in the world with a
character to lose. With a quaking heart, but as firm
a footstep as he could command, Toad set forth cautiously
(14:59):
on what's It seemed to be a most hair brained
and hazardous undertaking, but he was soon agreeably surprised to
find how easy everything was made for him, and little
humbled at the thought that both his popularity and the
sex that seemed to inspire it were really another's. The
washerwoman's squat figure, in its familiar cotton print, seemed a
(15:23):
passport for every barred door and grim gateway. Even when
he hesitated, uncertain as to the right turning to take,
he found himself helped out of his difficulty by the
water at the next gate, anxious to be off to
his tea, and summoning him to come along sharp and
not keep him waiting there all night. The chaff and
(15:45):
the humorous sallies to which he was subjected, and to which,
of course he had to provide prompt and effective reply formed.
Indeed his chief danger, for Toad was an animal with
a strong sense of his own dignity, and the chaff
was mostly, he thought poor and clumsy, and the humor
(16:06):
of the sallies entirely lacking. However, he kept his temper,
though with great difficulty, suited his retorts to his company
and his supposed character, and did his best not to
overstep the limits of good taste. It seemed hours before
he crossed the last courtyard, rejected the pressing invitations from
(16:30):
the last guard room, and dodged the outspread arms of
the last warder, pleading with simulated passion for just one
more farewell embrace. But at last he heard the wicket
gate in the great outer door click behind him, felt
the fresh air of the outer world upon his anxious brow,
and he knew that he was free. Dizzy with the
(16:55):
easy success of his daring exploit, he walked quickly towards
the life heights of the town, not knowing in the
least what he should do next, only quite certain of
one thing, that he must remove himself as quickly as
possible from the neighborhood where the lady he was forced
to represent was so well known and so popular a character.
(17:17):
As he walked along, considering his attention, was caught by
some red and green lights a little way off to
one side of the town, and the sound of the
puffing and snorting of engines, and the banging of shunted
trucks fell on his ear. Ah, he thought, this is
a piece of luck. A railway station is the thing
(17:39):
I want most in the whole world at this moment.
And what's more, I needn't go through the town to
get it, and shan't have to support this humiliating character
by repartees, which, though thoroughly effective, do not assist one's
sense of self respect. He made his way to the
station accordingly, consulted a timetable, and found that a train
(18:04):
bound more or less in the direction of his home,
was due to start in half an hour. More luck,
said Toad, his spirits rising rapidly, and went off to
the booking office to buy his ticket. He gave the
name of the station that he knew to be nearest
to the village of which Toad Hall was the principal feature,
(18:25):
and mechanically put his fingers in search of the necessary
money where his waistcoat pocket should have been. But here
the cotton gown, which had nobly stood by him so far,
and which he had basely forgotten, intervened and frustrated his efforts.
(18:45):
In a sort of nightmare, he struggled with this strange,
uncanny thing that seemed to hold his hands, turned all
muscular strivings to water, and laugh at him all the time,
while other travelers forming up in a line behind, weighted
with impatience, making suggestions of more or less value, and
(19:07):
comments of more or less stringency, and point at last
somehow he never rightly understood how he burst the barriers,
attained the goal, arrived at where all waistcoat pockets are
eternally situated, and found not only no money, but no
pocket to hold it, and no waistcoat to hold the pocket.
(19:32):
To his horror, he recollected that they had left both
coat and waistcoat behind him in his cell, and with
them his pocketbook, money, keys, watch, matches, pencil case, all
that makes life worth living, all that distinguishes the many
pocketed animal, the lord of creation, from the inferior one
(19:53):
pocketed or no pocketed productions that hop or trip about
permissively unequipped for the real cun test. In his misery,
he made one desperate effort to carry the thing off,
and with return to his fine old manner, a blend
of the squire and the college dawn, he said, look
(20:13):
here I find I've left my purse behind. Just give
me that ticket, will you, and I'll send the money
on tomorrow. I'm well known in these parts. The clerk
stared at him and the rusty black bonnet a moment
and then laughed. I should think you were pretty well
known in these parts, he said, if you've tried this
(20:36):
game on often here, stand away from the window, please, madam.
You're obstructing the other passengers. An old gentleman who had
been prodding him in the back for some moments here
thrust him away, and what was worse, addressed him as
his good woman, which angered Toad more than anything that
had occurred that evening. Baffled and full of he wandered
(21:01):
blindly down the platform where the train was standing, and
tears trickled down each side of his nose. It was hard,
he thought, to be within sight of safety and almost
of home, and to be balked by the want of
a few wretched shillings and by the pettifogging mistrustfulness of
paid officials. Very soon his escape would be discovered, the
(21:26):
hunt would be up. He would be caught, reviled, loaded
with chains, dragged back again to prison and bread and
water and straw his guards, and penalties would be doubled,
and oh what sarcastic remarks the girl would make what
was to be done. He was not swift of foot,
(21:47):
his figure was unfortunately recognizable. Could he not squeeze under
the seat of a carriage? He had seen this method
adopted by schoolboys when the journey money provided by thoughtful
parents have been diverted to other end, better ends. As
he pondered, he found himself opposite the engine, which was
(22:10):
being oiled, wiped, and gently caressed by its affectionate driver,
a burly man with an oil can in one hand
and a lump of cotton waste in the other. Hello, mother,
said the engine driver. What's the trouble? You don't look
particularly cheerful, Oh, sir, cried Toad, crying afresh, I'm a poor,
(22:33):
unhappy washerwoman, and I've lost all my money, and I
can't pay for a ticket, and I must get home
to night somehow, and whatever I am to do, I
don't know. Oh dear, oh dear, that's a bad business. Indeed,
said the engine driver reflectively, lost your money and can't
(22:56):
get home, and got some kids too waiting for you.
I dare say any amount of em sob toad, and
they'll be hungry and playing with matches in upsetting lamps,
the little innocence, and quarreling and going on generally. Oh dear,
oh dear, Well, I'll tell you what i'll do, said
(23:20):
the good engine driver. You're a washerwoman to your trade,
says you very well. That's that, And I'm an engine driver,
as you well may see. And there's no denying. It's
terribly dirty work uses up a powder of shirt, it does,
till my missus is fair tired of washin' of'em. If
(23:43):
you'll wash a few shirts for me when you get
home and send them along, I'll give you a ride
on my engine. It's against the company's regulations, but we're
not very particular in these out of the we parts.
The toad's misery turned into rapture as they eagerly scrambled
(24:03):
up into the cab of the engine. Of course, he
had never washed his shirt in his life, and couldn't
if he tried. Anyhow, he wasn't going to begin, but
he thought, when I get safely home to toad Hall
and have money again and pockets to put it in,
I will send the engine driver enough to pay for
quite a quantity of washing, and that will be the
(24:25):
same thing or better. The guard waved his welcome flag,
the engine driver whistled in cheerful response, and the train
moved out of the station. As the speed increased and
the toad could see on either side of him real
fields and trees and hedges, and cows and horses all
(24:45):
flying past him, and as he thought how every minute
was bringing him nearer to toad haul and sympathetic friends,
and money to chink in his pocket, and a soft
bed to sleep in, and good things to eat, and
praise and admiration. At the recital of his adventures and
his surpassing cleverness, he began to skip up and down
(25:08):
and shout and sing snatches of song, to the great
astonishment of the engine driver, who had come across washer
women before at long intervals, but never won at all
Like this. They had covered many and many a mile,
and Toad was already considering what he would have for
(25:28):
supper as soon as he got home, when he noticed
that the engine driver, with a puzzled expression on his face,
was leaning over the side of the engine and listening hard.
Then he saw him climb onto the coals and gaze
out over the top of the train. Then he returned
and said to Toad, it's very strange were the last
(25:50):
train running in this direction tonight? Yet I could be
sworn that I heard another following us. Toad ceased his
frivolous attics at once. He became grave and depressed, and
a dull pain in the lower part of his spine
communicating itself to his legs, made him want to sit
down and try desperately not to think of all the possibilities.
(26:16):
By this time, the moon was shining brightly, and the
engine driver, steadying himself on the coal could command a
view of the line behind them for a long distance. Presently,
he called out, I can see it clearly now. It
is an engine on our.
Speaker 2 (26:32):
Rails, coming along at a great pace. It looks as
if were being pursued. The miserable Toad, crouching in the
coal dust, tried hard to think of something to do
with dismal want of success. They are gaining on us fast,
cried the engine driver. And the engine is crowded with
(26:53):
the queerest lot of people, men like ancient waters waving halberds,
policemen in that helmets wave in truncheons, and shabbily dressed
men in pot hats, obvious and unmistakable playing clothes. Detectives,
even at this distance wavin revolvers and walking sticks, all
waving and all shouting.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
The same thing, stop, stop Stop. Then Toad fell on
his knees among the calls, and raising his clasped paws
and supplication cried, save me, only save me, dear kind
mister engine driver, And I will confess everything. I am
not the simple washerwoman I seem to be. I have
(27:36):
no children waiting for me, innocent or otherwise. I am
a toad, the well known and popular mister Toad, a
landed proprietor. I have just escaped, by my great daring
and cleverness, from a loathsome dungeon into which my enemies
had flung me. And if those fellows on that engine
(27:57):
recapture me, it will be jain's and bread in water
and straw and misery once more for poor, unhappy, innocent Toad.
The engine driver looked down upon him very sternly, and said,
now tell the truth, what will you put in prison? For?
It was nothing, very much, said poor Toad, coloring deeply.
(28:21):
I only borrowed a motor car where while the owners
were at lunch, they had no need of it at
the time. I didn't mean to steal it, really, but people,
especially magistrates, take such harsh views of thoughtless and high
spirited actions. The engine driver looked very grave and said,
(28:42):
I fear that you have been indeed a wicked toad,
and by rights I ought to give you up to
offended justice. But you are evidently in sore trouble and distress,
so I will not desert you. I don't hold with
motor cars, for one thing, and I don't with being
ordered about by policemen when I'm on my own engine,
(29:03):
for another. And the sight of an animal in tears
always makes me feel queer and soft hearted. So cheer up, toad.
I'll do my best and we may beat them. Yet
they piled on more coals, shoveling furiously, The furnace roared,
the sparks flew, the engine leaped and swung, but still
(29:26):
their pursuers slowly gained. The engine driver, with a sigh,
wiped his brow with a handful of cotton waste and said,
I'm afraid it's no good, toad. You see, they are
running light, and they have the better engine. There's just
one thing left for us to do, and it's only chance.
So at tend very carefully to what I tell you.
(29:49):
A short way ahead of us is a long tunnel,
and on the other side of that the line passes
through a thick wood. Now I will put on all
the I can while we are running through the tunnel,
but the other fellows will slow down a bit naturally
for fear of an accident. When we are through, I
(30:10):
will shut off steam and put on brakes as hard
as I can, and the moment it's safe to do so,
you must jump and hide in the wood before they
get through the tunnel and see you. Then I will
go full speed ahead again, and they can chase me
if they like, for as long as they like, in
as far as they like. Now mind and be ready
(30:32):
to jump when I tell you. They piled on more coals,
and the train shot into the tunnel, and the engine
rushed and roared and rattled, till at last they shot
out the other end into fresh air and the peaceful moonlight,
and saw the wood lying dark and helpful upon either
side of the line. The driver shut off steam and
(30:53):
put on brakes. The toad got down on the step,
and as the train slowed down to almost a walking pace,
he heard the driver call out, now jump. Toad jumped,
rolled down a short embankment, picked himself up, unhurt, scrambled
into the wood and hid. Peeping out. He saw his
(31:14):
train get up speed again and disappear at a great pace.
Then out of the tunnel burst the pursuing engine, roaring
and whistling, her motley crew waving their various weapons and
shouting stop, stop stop. When they were past, the toad
had a hearty laugh for the first time since he
was thrown into prison, but he soon stopped laughing when
(31:37):
he came to consider that it was now very late
and dark and cold. He was in an unknown wood,
with no money and no chance of supper, and still
far from friends and home, and the dead silence of
everything after the roar and rattle of the train was
something of a shock. He dared not leave the shelter
(31:58):
of the trees, so he struck into the wood with
the idea of leaving the railway as far as possible
behind him. After so many weeks within walls, he found
the wood strange and unfriendly and inclined. He thought to
make fun of him. Night jars, sounding their mechanical rattle,
(32:19):
made him think that the wood was full of searching
warders closing in on him. An owl, swooping noiselessly toward him,
brushed his shoulder with its wing, making him jump with
the horrid certainty that it was a hand, then flitted
off mothlike, laughing its low hoo hoo hoo, which Toad
(32:42):
thought it very poor taste. Once he met a fox
who stopped, looked him up and down in a sarcastic
sort of way, and said, hello, washer woman, half a
pair of socks and a pillow case short this week.
Mind it doesn't occur again, and swaggered off, sniggering. Toad
looked about for a stone to throw at him, but
(33:04):
could not succeed in fighting one, which vexed him more
than anything. At last, cold, hungry and tired out, he
sought the shelter of a hollow tree, where with branches
and dead leaves, he made himself as comfortable a bed
as he could, and slept soundly till the morning. The
(33:25):
end of chapter eight