August 7, 2025 • 29 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Craft Presents. The Great Guilders.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Leave the Craft Cheese Company, who also bring you ving
crossby every Thursday night present each week at this time,
Harold Perry is the Great guilder Sleeve written by Leonard L.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Levinson.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Now it's time to join that busy businessman, that solid citizen,
and that unctious uncle rock Morton p Guildersleeve, who's arrived
home from the office an hour earlier than usual today
because of a splitting headache.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Welcome are so what are you doing home at this
How good afternoon?
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Adri I closed the office early on economist splitting headache.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Oh that's too bad.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Are you feeling just wonderful?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
What about the headache?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Oh? She went home? She yes, I didn't have the headache.
It was my secretary, Miss Rep. Vogel. I kept telling
the girl, poor girl, to get glasses, but she thinks
they'll spoil her good looks.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
If that girl ever wore glasses, she could see that
she hasn't any good looks.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
That's probably why she doesn't wear them anyhow. After she left,
I yes, I got a touch of spring fever. Oh
you did, yes, you know in the spring a young
man's fancy It lightly turns at the thoughts. That's from
Lochley's Hall at Tennyson.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
What she wish? You can't imagine what wander into our backyard?
Just now, high uncle morsh there's a golf in our backyard.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
You a goat.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
You're a real life billy goat with all the accessories
appear at one end of the tail.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Of the other, and two horns well, and a very
good bumper too, I'll bet what's it doing in our yard?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Well, it pulled up some of those onions you planted,
and right now it's having dinner onions. I never planted it. Oh,
good heaven because of my crocus boats. Why didn't you
stop him? Uncle mare, please come along.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
And help, certainly, my dear, come along, Leroy, Oh.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Gee, crocus, you'll crop the.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Goat, Leroy, I can see you don't know very much
about a goat. Suggestion.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Now you'll get right out of my flower garden, you
old devil.
Speaker 4 (02:18):
Make himself eating my flowers.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
That find the class.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
It's all right, my dear. No see here. What's the
goat's name, Leroy, I don't know. We just can't call
him anonymous. Oh I know, let's call him Horace. After
Judge Horace Booker. There's quite a resemblance between those two
old goats, anyway, Uncle Morre, you don't really mean that, No, Leroy,
the goat's more intelligent looking.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Oh hurry, Uncle Mooy. Well you've been talking. That got
eating four crocus, all the masters, and now he started.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
On my lilling last he has has a You get
away from those lillies horse quickly now before you wind
up pulling one of them. It looks like Horace has
been eating the radishes too. Hey, come on, Leroy, help
(03:12):
me drag him out of there.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Maybe I can handle him myself. Uncle More, come on
out of their horrice, old boy, nice little gals, Come on,
palsy welsey out a boy. That's right. You see how
you have to do is treat him with kindness. Oh look,
Uncle morn he likes you.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Well, isn't that to you?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Without Uncle mart he's chewing asleep, yeah he is.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
And stop that Horace. Let go unhand me, sir, Yes, Horace.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Don't you want sleep? You might truck on the buttons.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Be nice to your uncle mort I'm not that goat's
uncle mort A Lee Roy, you take this silly billy
back to its owner.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I don't know who he belongs to. Nobody around here
keeps goats. She must have wandered in from out of town.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
You can wander right back out again. You hear that goat?
Beat it ski doo? If vamoos that's Spanish for scram
ley roy if hypercasa? What's that that Portuguese for vamooz.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
Gordee zunk? Couldn't we keep him for just a little while?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
E boy, We're not running a bye the wee for
belligerent billy goats.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
But he'd make a keen pet.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Young man, your pets have been my peeve. We've let
you keep rabbits, turtles, and frogs and chipmunks, but goats
some more than I can stomach, and goodness knows I
can stomach a lot.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
I agree, uncle Lord. Now how can we get rid
of him?
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I call the city hall?
Speaker 3 (04:35):
City Hall?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Yes, there must be some department down there that handles
runaway goats.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
But gee, uncley, can't we just keep him?
Speaker 1 (04:40):
I'll tell you why, my boy. In the first place,
he doesn't belong to us. The second place, whoever owns
he might want him back. In the third place, I
won't have him tearing up our place in the first place.
Speaker 5 (04:51):
Quiet you, Hello, hello, hello, now welcome bore.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Don't lose your temper.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Why shouldn't I lose my temper? Been on this telephone
that I've gotten a cauliflower ear.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Maybe no one that's down the city hall wants a goat.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
There must be some department that handles him down there, Leroy,
by George, what are we paying taxes for? Operator? Wake up?
Good afternoon, Hall, Oh, good afternoon, My dear. Did you
have a nice nap?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
Why are you want? Please?
Speaker 1 (05:30):
This is still Frock Martin P. Gillersley.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Oh yeah, the governor.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
One one moment, please, I'd like to see Hitler hold
his breath for one of her moments. Leroy, did you
tie that goat to the tree like I told you to?
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (05:45):
I did. Uncle. He chewed through the rope. Oh dear,
what's he doing now? I'm just standing there eating the
rest of the rope.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Well, let's give him enough rope and maybe he'll operator.
I want somebody to come and get my goat.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Well, hold on, here.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
You are, oh helth broklan.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Ohod last, mister inkwistl. I'm calling about a goat, all right?
Speaker 6 (06:08):
That's not my line. I don't have no sick goats.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
But this goat isn't sick. Then you want Percy Hodkin
just a second? Hello all Bonkin speaking Hello mister Bodkin.
We've got to go down at our house. I know
as any knows. How does it smell terrible? I've heard
that one. No, no, no, this is a perfectly healthy goat.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
Are you sure has it had a physical lately?
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Look? It's straight into y yi. We want you to
come and take it away, But I'm just the inspector
of got smell. This isn't nanny goat. It's a bill.
Oh bill, he's out to lunch now, I haven't called you.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
When he gets back, operator, Operator.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
I'm dying to help you.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Hecoy locked and found. Go ahead and.
Speaker 6 (06:54):
Next all, I understand you're lost of court. What kind
over good top coach support?
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Go No? No, not a coat a goat or go yeah?
Get in the city hard No here at home?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
How could you lose a golt at home?
Speaker 6 (07:09):
You probably just mislead it was.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
I didn't mislaid it. I found it.
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Well, then if you found it, why are you bothering me?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Because it isn't mind.
Speaker 6 (07:18):
But does the court hit you.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Yeah, it's not a coat, it's a goat. It's g
ot goat.
Speaker 6 (07:23):
Oh now I understand. I switch you are with the
park Commission. They use him on the day.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Use what on the lake boats? Hell? No operator operator,
city planning commission. I don't want the Planning Commission. I
just want to find out how to get rid of
a goat.
Speaker 6 (07:38):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Yes, the phone girl told me. All you have to
do is come down here and sign a complaint. I'll
be glad to Then what happens, We'll send a policeman out.
He'll arrest that man. He can't keep a goat in
the residential zone. Yeah, all right here, right time for you?
(07:59):
And fought off the bed.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
Oh but gee, it's early. Can I read to the
end of the chapter?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
No, young man, before you go to your room, I
want you to go outside and chase that miserable goat
out of our yard. You mean tonight right now? Locked
the gates so we can't get back in again.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Okay, it's a pretty tough break for the old fellow.
No place to turn too late at nice.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I thought you just said it was early, sure.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
For me, but not for a ghost it's pretty sad.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Now, let's not get sentimental about a billy goat.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
You haven't. How would you feel if it was a
cold night and you were all alone in a strange
city and you were a ghost.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Well I'd feel. How do I know I'm not a goat? Well?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
Uncle, wa just supposing you were?
Speaker 1 (08:34):
Horace is Leroy? Sit down, We're going to have a
little man to man talk.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
Cheer a candy hearty.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
Just sit down, young man. Oh, I don't want to
appear hard hearted, but we've got to look at this
entire goat problem from the practical standpoint. Understand, yes, sir, Now,
first of all, am I this goat's keeper. Did I
invite him to come here and live with us?
Speaker 3 (08:56):
But you never told him he couldn't come either, Uncle,
what I've.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
Got let's be called about this, LeRoi. The trouble with you,
young man, is that you're too impulsive rare. Yes, you
should carefully consider what you're jumping into and then don't jump.
Why what business would we have owning a goat?
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Of course, well business we can run him out to
the neighbors as a lawnmower.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
That's not the point, Leroy. Let's get down to cold
bear facts.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Sure, poor old Horace is cold and bear, and that's
a fact, and harmless and lonesome too.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
But you've got to realize, my boy, that that isn't
our fault.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Oh I do want, And I realized it wouldn't be
our fault either if we threw him out and it
started to rain and he caught cold and wound up
with double pneumonia.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Yes, double oh, yes, that's perfectly true. If you think
it's going to rain, who are we care if it does.
I never heard of a goat catching double ammonia before.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Who suppose he doesn't. Then he may start to death
or get run over by a truck.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Oh, I'd hate to think that, Leroy. Maybe I've been
too impulsive.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
Oh no, well, I guess I'm gonna go out and
chase Horrace out of our backyard.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
Yes, sir, you don't even bother my boy. I'll take
care of those things myself. But you said that I
was supposed Never mind, Leroy, it might rain, and if
that poor old goat hasn't got anywhere else to go,
it won't hurt us if he spends the night under
our mouthberry bunch.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
She results and we're gonna keep it there.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
You go, acting impulsive again.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
He hasn't given us any trouble since he had his don.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Do you remember what he had for dinner? A delicious
set of Grandma Guilders leaves, lace curtains.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
But he won't do it again. I'll watch a month.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Well, we'll see, Leroy. I'm gonna see that. You get
straight to bed. Come on, I'm going to come with me.
I'm going to my room anyway. There's an old blanket
in my closet I'm gonna take outside for that goat
in case it gets cold tonight or if he gets hungry.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Oh, I don't think you need to bother lock. He'll
he'll be just fine without that.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, seeing that I am the host, of course I
might as well as the leroy. What's going on in
your room?
Speaker 6 (10:51):
Nothing?
Speaker 7 (10:51):
Hey, well let's take a look, leroy, Look at your
mackerst that's the last straw.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Do you think that was the last straw? Judge Hooker, No,
I put that horse horas, I mean that goat. I
put him outside after that, and he spent the night
bleeding his brains out. What have you done about it today?
I placed an ad in the Lost and Found section
of the newspaper. I expect this about.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Judge Hooker joy the latest news about the giddy slee goodles.
Because you haven't you haven't been known with me.
Speaker 8 (11:30):
Well, we haven't had so much excitement in the neighborhood
since said don'tnut Judge ran over that coffee salesman.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
My goodness, Doddy, what's happened now?
Speaker 3 (11:39):
Well, your good is about the worst habit. He's playing
games with everybody. What's on the game, Well, it's one
called button button. Who's gonna get the button?
Speaker 8 (11:48):
Oh, my goodness, usually tied to somebody playing dropped the handkerchief,
and then the goat plays Cop Stiffin's blot.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
And the thing go here.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
It's true. Great jumping jeeps. Come on, Judge, let's go.
Thank you for telling us. Doddie, there's all right.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Well, immediacy. They's going to sue you for damages. For
the life of me, I can't see why they want
more damages.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Shake a lake, Judge, before that goat busted me into bankruptcy. Oh,
by George, there he is not. He's a cute looking fellow. Yes,
A lot of people who think you're cute looking to judge,
and for the very same reason. What do you mean, Oh,
any similarity between you and that goat is purely coincidental.
But there's still definitely a similarity, eh Bertie, afternoon afternoon
(12:33):
to you.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
To judge.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
I don't suppose the owner of that goat showed up,
No he didn't.
Speaker 9 (12:37):
He's a powerful, smart man, that man is. However, there
was another man around here looking for to buy that goat.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Well, why didn't you sell it to him? Well, not
supposed I did, and the owner showed up.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
That's how people get their selves into pokey.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
But we have a legal right to sell this animal, now,
haven't we judged?
Speaker 3 (12:53):
That's right.
Speaker 6 (12:54):
The decision was handed down in state of Nebraska versus
two unclaimed guinea pigs, later amended to ask a versus
unspecified number of guinea bag.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
That's fine, judge. Now, Britty, do you remember the name
of the man who wanted to buy that goat? No,
that don't. Oh what a pity.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
But he left his card here?
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Oh his card? Good, let's have thanks you. I'll pick
it up, and never mind, Brady, I'll get it. Look, Gail,
they get up here comes that goat. What you say,
jus goat. Come on.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Here, let me help you out.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
You aren't hurt.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Are you guilty?
Speaker 1 (13:32):
No? No, of course not, judge. I'm just practicing forced landings.
Where is that goat? You better get rid of him.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
That's guilty.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
That's just what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna sell him
right now. Where's that man's card? I dropped? But it
wasn't in the grass a minute ago? Yes, it was
right away. Oh, somebody stopped that goat. Yo, it's too
lady just chewed up the cart with a customer's name.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
We'll hear from the Great jailer sleeve again in just
the moment. But first, I want to spread the good news.
All you busy homemakers will be tickled pink to know
that there is a way to make delicious macaroni and
cheese fast. In fact, you can make fluffy, light macaroni
drenched in cheese goodness in just seven minutes cooking time.
The product called Kraft Dinner holds the secret of this speech.
(14:23):
In every Kraft Dinner package there's a quick cooking macaroni
that needs no baking at all.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Also, some craft grated that.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
In a twinkling gives your grand cheese flavor through and through.
Just seven minutes at the stove, and you have a
marvelous main dish, fluffy, tender macaroni drenched in cheese goodness.
The family will say Kraft dinner is just about the
best macaroni and cheese you ever made, and you will
say Kraft Dinner is a positive treasure on days when
you have to work fast to get luncheon on time,
(14:51):
or for dinners when you've spent the afternoon shopping or
working late on your defense job. So stock the emergency
shelf tomorrow with several packages of Craft dinner. Now let's
(15:12):
return to the great Guildersleeve, who's putting the finishing touches
on a temporary goat pen the hold horse until he
can be sold, given away, or just tied to some
fence and ran from.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Hell. We a lei roy And there you are, mister goat. Yeah, oh,
but I'm tired. I'm going to take a nap in
the hammick leroy.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
Okay, you take it easy. I'm going on with piggybank
House and see if his mother'll let him take hers.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
All right, Only don't wake me up unless she's foolish
enough to say yes.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
Gee, poor uncle morph he's getting to the eggway. He
can't take these things. Oh my gosh, Dames LeRoi, we've
been looking for you, haven't we.
Speaker 5 (15:50):
Girl.
Speaker 8 (15:51):
That's all right.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
We just come to my birthday lesson.
Speaker 8 (15:53):
We needed this and click the practice on before we
forget everything we learned.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Just now, come on, little man, let us standied you up. No,
I'm going shall the last time you guys wrapped up
my leg.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
My foot was asleep all afternoon. Besides, I gotta see
a lay a bottle ghost. Now it looks like we'll
have to practice on each other. Oh no, let let's
see at thirty here, right, Oh, Bertie, would you like
to come out here and be a victim, a victim
of wasn't miss March circumstances of a broken leg, rain,
burns everything.
Speaker 9 (16:22):
No, ma'am, I have absolutely no inclinations in that direction.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
We just wanna practice first day down you. We're just
gonna pretend that you're hurt.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Can't you do it just pretending I'm there too.
Speaker 9 (16:32):
I've got a pressing engagement to press that dress you
wants to wear to night.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
But if you want me to leave that to go,
oh no.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
No, no, berdie, No, we'll we'll find someone else. They might.
Speaker 8 (16:41):
Isn't that you hurkle over there in the HAMMOCKA ask he.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Make an overly jolly patience, wouldn't he? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Do you think we've gotten enough bandages to go around?
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Let's go ask him? Come on, well, let's be quiet. Please,
do you mind if we.
Speaker 8 (17:01):
Usual to dummy to practice at first? Seat on and
the kind of nobody else will? And you don't have
to disturb yourself in the least says? We can go
right ahead just the way you are.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
This shoe flies away.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
He's asleep. We shouldn't disturbing dotty if uncome on a sleep.
Speaker 4 (17:15):
I don't think even Dotty can disturb him.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Yeah, do you mean it's all right to proceed?
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Sure, just as.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Long as we don't treat him too roughly or push
him out of the hammock.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
Oh gooddie, I've just been waiting for a chance.
Speaker 8 (17:28):
Like just to practice my journey because now just an'll tell.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
Mister Gilders, well, this would be a good time to
work on chest bands. You no, I'm afraid we'd have
to get him up for that. Well, couldn't I just
roll a bandage around here, Amanda Hammock.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Oh, yeah, yeah, that would being logical. Well what are
you going to do, Margie? Oh? I think I'll work
on that treatment for burns.
Speaker 4 (17:49):
And rub some of the stab and uncle saith. You'll
probably keep him from getting sunburned too. M ooh, this
Sam is certainly strong.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
Your uncle is certainly a sound sleeper. Yeah, just listen
to that sound.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
I never thought it would take so many mad bandies
as you go around your uncles.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
To come from mart Yeah. That takes him a lot
of territory, doesn't it.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Got what?
Speaker 4 (18:21):
This stuff is sticky and you want to have an
extra handkerchiem just this second and I'll be through then.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
Dolly dumpson, what are you doing to my uncle?
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Who?
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I'm just tightening this turn cat? But good heaven, Dotty,
you never use a tony get on the neck. That's
maybe we better help him sit up. We can't sit up.
(18:53):
He's Dandy's the hammer in that case, we better Oh
my goodness, what's that? Just got one's out?
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Get out?
Speaker 3 (19:05):
You try to just says into the house or him.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I can't leave Uncle Moore like this. Oh here comes,
I can't get up if who tied me down here? Well,
why'd you do it?
Speaker 9 (19:28):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:28):
It's you. What do you want you get away from me? Oh?
Your nose is cold? Yeah? Quit flicking my face, Horace.
Your beard tickles, mister.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Gilsey, don't you.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
I think you'd better figure out some way to get
rid of that goat, because the animosity against him on
the outside is beginning to penetrate on the inside.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
What do you mean, Bertie, Well, I happen to know
a certain.
Speaker 9 (20:11):
Very reliable and capable cook who has been offered a
most lucrative position in a completely golpeless household.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Oh should I be more pacific? No? No, no, I
think I understand, Bertie. And I'm trying to get rid
of Horrse too.
Speaker 4 (20:25):
Well.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
I sure hope you does it instantaneously too.
Speaker 9 (20:28):
I'm tired of flying a kite from the second floor
every time I got clothed to dry and wear the
skin it whenever I have to bustle out into the yards.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
And you folks ain't had it so.
Speaker 9 (20:39):
Easy either, now, buffet dinners every night standing up.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Well, let's not go into that, Bertie. It's a painful subject.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Excuse me, I'm boy, I didn't know you were.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Here, Come here, young man, Oh meah, of course you, leroy.
Did you have anything to do with Horace chasing the
postman down the street and then eating our morning mails?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
Well, all the indirectly, Uncle Moore. You see, I was
trying to train him to fetch the mail inside every morning,
the way Piggybank's dog does.
Speaker 10 (21:06):
Well.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
He fetched it inside all right, saying we ought to
buy him a muscle. What's the use he'd eat that too.
What we should do is saw off his horns, trim
off his beard, and then tip off the dog catcher.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
Oh you can't do that, uncle more.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
He likes you.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Every time he sees you a look steals into his great, big,
beautiful blue eyes.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Too bad I couldn't see that look. When I was
bending over to find the keyhole last night he knocked
me clear into the sitting room. Now what as if
I didn't know? Yes, that's me. I'm from the city Hall.
Speaker 10 (21:50):
Do you keep a goat on these premises and violations
the city's owning coat?
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Of course you do. I can see him from here.
Speaker 10 (21:54):
You down, Elisa, to conduct the goat Darry has provided
for in the civil statues of the state. I thought,
nut as a has had go proven the nuisance, diserver
of the peace and menace of life, limb and real
estate values. I thought as much better get rid of it,
one skilleder sleeve. That goat is putting into everybody's business today.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
All right, that's enough of meat. Get your cat ley, Roy,
and come along.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Okay, where are we going?
Speaker 1 (22:16):
You heard the man. We're gonna take that backyard battering
ram out of the country and get rid of him. Hey, here, horse,
come on, nice little goat. Sure you lead him around
to the car leroy.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
All right, careful, Lucky, you'll type your shoelaces on time.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Lace on time. Oh thank you, I've got to pick
it out.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
Oh forget, I'm kicking TRD.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I don't see him where I fooled him that time.
I'm wearing my air raid warden Healbert where he'll do
the most good.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
Let's play that for him up ahead, the farmer.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Oh yes, but this is all right, Stop me, Roy.
I never thought there were so many goat haters in
this part of the country. Hello there, neighbor, Hello there,
how would you like to buy a dandy go to
the cheap price? No, no, thank you, yanker. Mane.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
Why not?
Speaker 6 (23:21):
It's goats's too stoborn.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
They're used blank yeahs, sir, But just look at this animal.
He's a genuine gym, a genuine jim. He looked more
like a york You can have him for only two dollars.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
No, No, too high?
Speaker 1 (23:37):
All right, I'm tired of hauling him around the countryside.
You can have him for nothing.
Speaker 6 (23:40):
That's still too high.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Well, and suppose I give you three or four dollars?
How about that for No? You were yashing me. I'm
not yashing you, joshing you? Well, what do you say?
Speaker 3 (23:51):
No?
Speaker 1 (23:52):
But why not?
Speaker 6 (23:53):
That goat is for ten dollars for sure? If you
ask glass something done wrong? Sure you get along now
get off man property. Don't want no dealings, mad hot goat?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Well for the hot?
Speaker 3 (24:06):
Oh hars, what have you done?
Speaker 9 (24:09):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (24:09):
Look at the upholstery in the back seat.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
The upholstery. Where is it? I get away? All right, brother,
this is the end of the line.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
What did that do?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Open that back door, leroy, and I'll get out of
horse door quickly. Roy, goodbye, yeah, goodbye horse. Well let's
get home, leroy.
Speaker 7 (24:43):
H my goodness, look, we're all a ghastly Roy or
it's getting away from most tires.
Speaker 9 (25:00):
It's seven o'clocks March. You still want to wait dinner
for mister Gilson leaving me royal?
Speaker 3 (25:03):
Oh, yes, Bertie, just a little while longer anyhow. Oh
I do hope they come back without that goat.
Speaker 9 (25:08):
Yes, ma'am, And so does everybody else who's ever come
in contact with him.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Thought to give the devil his dues.
Speaker 9 (25:15):
That heart had the most personality I ever saw in
a goat.
Speaker 3 (25:19):
Too bad?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Was all negative.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
Oh, I don't know what we'll do, say, bring him
back again? Do you think we can hide him someplace
when the neighbors wouldn't find out? No, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
They shall get the wind of it somehow.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
I guess you're right, well.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Bertie, yes, sir.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
How about that horse goat?
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (25:39):
We found out who owned him and gave him back,
you did? Who does he belong to?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
The Summerfield railroad yards?
Speaker 3 (25:44):
A railroad yards? Well, I've heard a donkey.
Speaker 9 (25:47):
And jews and cowcatchers for what the boats do.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
On the railroad. Well it Horace works down at the stockyards.
He leads the sheep out of the pins and into
the box cards.
Speaker 3 (25:55):
Yeah, when he ran away, they thought he'd been shipped
somewhere by mistake.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Yes, they would tear be glad to get him back again,
because it's practically impossible to move the sheep unless he
leads them.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Oh, thank goodness, that's all over. Who said?
Speaker 9 (26:07):
Now if you poke it off, I'll put din on
right away?
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Oh dinner? And if I got an appetite me too,
come on? Come on? Yes, sure you don't know what
a load this is off my shoulders? Why I feel like?
If I feel like something wrong? What's that noise outside?
Speaker 3 (26:23):
You gotta go to the door, uncle, Yes, I'll.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Soon find out.
Speaker 7 (26:29):
Ah quate jumping keeps horse has come back again, and
he's brought all his blue sheep friends with the.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Great deelous Lave will be with us again in just
a few minutes. Meanwhile, I'd like to mention that macaroni
and cheese is one of America's favorite dishes, and now
Kraft makes it possible for you to prepare this favorite
dish in only seven minutes.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You do it with a product called Kraft Dinner.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
For Kraft Dinner gives you a special quick cooking macaroni
that gets fluffy tender in boiling water in a hurry,
no need to blanch and bake this macaroni. Also on
the Kraft Dinner package is some craft grated that puts
grand cheese flavor into the macaroni. Quick You spend just
seven minutes at the stove to get tender macaroni drenched
in cheese goodness. It's a kitchen miracle that will thrill
(27:30):
you and delight the whole family. Kraft Dinner is a
main dish all by itself, four good servings in every box.
If you serve it molded into a ring and filled
with cream seafood, you have a real party dish in
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Don't fuss with grating cheese and making a cream sauce.
Give them grand macaroni and cheese cooked in seven minutes.
(27:53):
Stock up on Kraft Dinner tomorrow, Ladies and gentlemen. In
this war that we're fighting, there are a million stirring
(28:14):
stories of valor and endurance and personal sacrifice. At this
very moment, on every ocean, men of our navy are
writing and heroic page in our.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
History, and in order that they may fight with untroubled hearts,
secure in the knowledge that their loved ones at home
are not in distress. The Navy Relief Society is asking
us to contribute a fund of five million dollars.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
That's right, Marjorie. For forty years, the men of our Navy,
Marine Corps and Coastguard have provided immediate direct relief for
their dependents themselves. But now since Pearl Harbor, the need
has become much greater, and so all of us are
going to have the privilege of helping give.
Speaker 4 (28:50):
Now and give generously, either to your local Navy Relief
Drive or to the Navy Relief Society.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
Seven thirty fifth Avenue, New York City.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
That's right, seven thirty fifth Avenue, New York City. Thank you,
and good night, ladies and gentlemen. Original music heard on
(29:22):
this program was composed and conducted by William Rambo. This
is Jim Bannon's thinking of the Craft Teese Company.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I'm inviting you to be worked us again next week
at the same time for the further adventures of the
Great Yelders League.
Speaker 1 (29:34):
This program has come to you from Hollywood. This is
the nice little Broadcasting Company
Craft Presents. The Great Guilders.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Leave the Craft Cheese Company, who also bring you ving
crossby every Thursday night present each week at this time,
Harold Perry is the Great guilder Sleeve written by Leonard L.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Levinson.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Now it's time to join that busy businessman, that solid citizen,
and that unctious uncle rock Morton p Guildersleeve, who's arrived
home from the office an hour earlier than usual today
because of a splitting headache.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Welcome are so what are you doing home at this
How good afternoon?
Speaker 1 (00:55):
Adri I closed the office early on economist splitting headache.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Oh that's too bad.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Are you feeling just wonderful?
Speaker 3 (01:01):
What about the headache?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Oh? She went home? She yes, I didn't have the headache.
It was my secretary, Miss Rep. Vogel. I kept telling
the girl, poor girl, to get glasses, but she thinks
they'll spoil her good looks.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
If that girl ever wore glasses, she could see that
she hasn't any good looks.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
That's probably why she doesn't wear them anyhow. After she left,
I yes, I got a touch of spring fever. Oh
you did, yes, you know in the spring a young
man's fancy It lightly turns at the thoughts. That's from
Lochley's Hall at Tennyson.
Speaker 3 (01:32):
What she wish? You can't imagine what wander into our backyard?
Just now, high uncle morsh there's a golf in our backyard.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
You a goat.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
You're a real life billy goat with all the accessories
appear at one end of the tail.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Of the other, and two horns well, and a very
good bumper too, I'll bet what's it doing in our yard?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
Well, it pulled up some of those onions you planted,
and right now it's having dinner onions. I never planted it. Oh,
good heaven because of my crocus boats. Why didn't you
stop him? Uncle mare, please come along.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
And help, certainly, my dear, come along, Leroy, Oh.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Gee, crocus, you'll crop the.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Goat, Leroy, I can see you don't know very much
about a goat. Suggestion.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Now you'll get right out of my flower garden, you
old devil.
Speaker 4 (02:18):
Make himself eating my flowers.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
That find the class.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
It's all right, my dear. No see here. What's the
goat's name, Leroy, I don't know. We just can't call
him anonymous. Oh I know, let's call him Horace. After
Judge Horace Booker. There's quite a resemblance between those two
old goats, anyway, Uncle Morre, you don't really mean that, No, Leroy,
the goat's more intelligent looking.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Oh hurry, Uncle Mooy. Well you've been talking. That got
eating four crocus, all the masters, and now he started.
Speaker 1 (02:49):
On my lilling last he has has a You get
away from those lillies horse quickly now before you wind
up pulling one of them. It looks like Horace has
been eating the radishes too. Hey, come on, Leroy, help
(03:12):
me drag him out of there.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Maybe I can handle him myself. Uncle More, come on
out of their horrice, old boy, nice little gals, Come on,
palsy welsey out a boy. That's right. You see how
you have to do is treat him with kindness. Oh look,
Uncle morn he likes you.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Well, isn't that to you?
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Without Uncle mart he's chewing asleep, yeah he is.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
And stop that Horace. Let go unhand me, sir, Yes, Horace.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Don't you want sleep? You might truck on the buttons.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Be nice to your uncle mort I'm not that goat's
uncle mort A Lee Roy, you take this silly billy
back to its owner.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
I don't know who he belongs to. Nobody around here
keeps goats. She must have wandered in from out of town.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
You can wander right back out again. You hear that goat?
Beat it ski doo? If vamoos that's Spanish for scram
ley roy if hypercasa? What's that that Portuguese for vamooz.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
Gordee zunk? Couldn't we keep him for just a little while?
Speaker 1 (04:14):
E boy, We're not running a bye the wee for
belligerent billy goats.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
But he'd make a keen pet.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Young man, your pets have been my peeve. We've let
you keep rabbits, turtles, and frogs and chipmunks, but goats
some more than I can stomach, and goodness knows I
can stomach a lot.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
I agree, uncle Lord. Now how can we get rid
of him?
Speaker 1 (04:34):
I call the city hall?
Speaker 3 (04:35):
City Hall?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Yes, there must be some department down there that handles
runaway goats.
Speaker 3 (04:38):
But gee, uncley, can't we just keep him?
Speaker 1 (04:40):
I'll tell you why, my boy. In the first place,
he doesn't belong to us. The second place, whoever owns
he might want him back. In the third place, I
won't have him tearing up our place in the first place.
Speaker 5 (04:51):
Quiet you, Hello, hello, hello, now welcome bore.
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Don't lose your temper.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Why shouldn't I lose my temper? Been on this telephone
that I've gotten a cauliflower ear.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Maybe no one that's down the city hall wants a goat.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
There must be some department that handles him down there, Leroy,
by George, what are we paying taxes for? Operator? Wake up?
Good afternoon, Hall, Oh, good afternoon, My dear. Did you
have a nice nap?
Speaker 3 (05:28):
Why are you want? Please?
Speaker 1 (05:30):
This is still Frock Martin P. Gillersley.
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Oh yeah, the governor.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
One one moment, please, I'd like to see Hitler hold
his breath for one of her moments. Leroy, did you
tie that goat to the tree like I told you to?
Speaker 6 (05:45):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (05:45):
I did. Uncle. He chewed through the rope. Oh dear,
what's he doing now? I'm just standing there eating the
rest of the rope.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Well, let's give him enough rope and maybe he'll operator.
I want somebody to come and get my goat.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
Well, hold on, here.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
You are, oh helth broklan.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Ohod last, mister inkwistl. I'm calling about a goat, all right?
Speaker 6 (06:08):
That's not my line. I don't have no sick goats.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
But this goat isn't sick. Then you want Percy Hodkin
just a second? Hello all Bonkin speaking Hello mister Bodkin.
We've got to go down at our house. I know
as any knows. How does it smell terrible? I've heard
that one. No, no, no, this is a perfectly healthy goat.
Speaker 3 (06:31):
Are you sure has it had a physical lately?
Speaker 1 (06:36):
Look? It's straight into y yi. We want you to
come and take it away, But I'm just the inspector
of got smell. This isn't nanny goat. It's a bill.
Oh bill, he's out to lunch now, I haven't called you.
Speaker 3 (06:45):
When he gets back, operator, Operator.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
I'm dying to help you.
Speaker 3 (06:51):
Hecoy locked and found. Go ahead and.
Speaker 6 (06:54):
Next all, I understand you're lost of court. What kind
over good top coach support?
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Go No? No, not a coat a goat or go yeah?
Get in the city hard No here at home?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
How could you lose a golt at home?
Speaker 6 (07:09):
You probably just mislead it was.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
I didn't mislaid it. I found it.
Speaker 6 (07:14):
Well, then if you found it, why are you bothering me?
Speaker 1 (07:16):
Because it isn't mind.
Speaker 6 (07:18):
But does the court hit you.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Yeah, it's not a coat, it's a goat. It's g
ot goat.
Speaker 6 (07:23):
Oh now I understand. I switch you are with the
park Commission. They use him on the day.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Use what on the lake boats? Hell? No operator operator,
city planning commission. I don't want the Planning Commission. I
just want to find out how to get rid of
a goat.
Speaker 6 (07:38):
Oh.
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Yes, the phone girl told me. All you have to
do is come down here and sign a complaint. I'll
be glad to Then what happens, We'll send a policeman out.
He'll arrest that man. He can't keep a goat in
the residential zone. Yeah, all right here, right time for you?
(07:59):
And fought off the bed.
Speaker 3 (08:00):
Oh but gee, it's early. Can I read to the
end of the chapter?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
No, young man, before you go to your room, I
want you to go outside and chase that miserable goat
out of our yard. You mean tonight right now? Locked
the gates so we can't get back in again.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
Okay, it's a pretty tough break for the old fellow.
No place to turn too late at nice.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I thought you just said it was early, sure.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
For me, but not for a ghost it's pretty sad.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
Now, let's not get sentimental about a billy goat.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
You haven't. How would you feel if it was a
cold night and you were all alone in a strange
city and you were a ghost.
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Well I'd feel. How do I know I'm not a goat? Well?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
Uncle, wa just supposing you were?
Speaker 1 (08:34):
Horace is Leroy? Sit down, We're going to have a
little man to man talk.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
Cheer a candy hearty.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
Just sit down, young man. Oh, I don't want to
appear hard hearted, but we've got to look at this
entire goat problem from the practical standpoint. Understand, yes, sir, Now,
first of all, am I this goat's keeper. Did I
invite him to come here and live with us?
Speaker 3 (08:56):
But you never told him he couldn't come either, Uncle,
what I've.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
Got let's be called about this, LeRoi. The trouble with you,
young man, is that you're too impulsive rare. Yes, you
should carefully consider what you're jumping into and then don't jump.
Why what business would we have owning a goat?
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Of course, well business we can run him out to
the neighbors as a lawnmower.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
That's not the point, Leroy. Let's get down to cold
bear facts.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Sure, poor old Horace is cold and bear, and that's
a fact, and harmless and lonesome too.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
But you've got to realize, my boy, that that isn't
our fault.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Oh I do want, And I realized it wouldn't be
our fault either if we threw him out and it
started to rain and he caught cold and wound up
with double pneumonia.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Yes, double oh, yes, that's perfectly true. If you think
it's going to rain, who are we care if it does.
I never heard of a goat catching double ammonia before.
Speaker 3 (09:45):
Who suppose he doesn't. Then he may start to death
or get run over by a truck.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Oh, I'd hate to think that, Leroy. Maybe I've been
too impulsive.
Speaker 3 (09:53):
Oh no, well, I guess I'm gonna go out and
chase Horrace out of our backyard.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
Yes, sir, you don't even bother my boy. I'll take
care of those things myself. But you said that I
was supposed Never mind, Leroy, it might rain, and if
that poor old goat hasn't got anywhere else to go,
it won't hurt us if he spends the night under
our mouthberry bunch.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
She results and we're gonna keep it there.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
You go, acting impulsive again.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
He hasn't given us any trouble since he had his don.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Do you remember what he had for dinner? A delicious
set of Grandma Guilders leaves, lace curtains.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
But he won't do it again. I'll watch a month.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Well, we'll see, Leroy. I'm gonna see that. You get
straight to bed. Come on, I'm going to come with me.
I'm going to my room anyway. There's an old blanket
in my closet I'm gonna take outside for that goat
in case it gets cold tonight or if he gets hungry.
Speaker 3 (10:39):
Oh, I don't think you need to bother lock. He'll
he'll be just fine without that.
Speaker 1 (10:42):
Well, seeing that I am the host, of course I
might as well as the leroy. What's going on in
your room?
Speaker 6 (10:51):
Nothing?
Speaker 7 (10:51):
Hey, well let's take a look, leroy, Look at your
mackerst that's the last straw.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
Do you think that was the last straw? Judge Hooker, No,
I put that horse horas, I mean that goat. I
put him outside after that, and he spent the night
bleeding his brains out. What have you done about it today?
I placed an ad in the Lost and Found section
of the newspaper. I expect this about.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Judge Hooker joy the latest news about the giddy slee goodles.
Because you haven't you haven't been known with me.
Speaker 8 (11:30):
Well, we haven't had so much excitement in the neighborhood
since said don'tnut Judge ran over that coffee salesman.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
My goodness, Doddy, what's happened now?
Speaker 3 (11:39):
Well, your good is about the worst habit. He's playing
games with everybody. What's on the game, Well, it's one
called button button. Who's gonna get the button?
Speaker 8 (11:48):
Oh, my goodness, usually tied to somebody playing dropped the handkerchief,
and then the goat plays Cop Stiffin's blot.
Speaker 3 (11:54):
And the thing go here.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
It's true. Great jumping jeeps. Come on, Judge, let's go.
Thank you for telling us. Doddie, there's all right.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Well, immediacy. They's going to sue you for damages. For
the life of me, I can't see why they want
more damages.
Speaker 1 (12:07):
Shake a lake, Judge, before that goat busted me into bankruptcy. Oh,
by George, there he is not. He's a cute looking fellow. Yes,
A lot of people who think you're cute looking to judge,
and for the very same reason. What do you mean, Oh,
any similarity between you and that goat is purely coincidental.
But there's still definitely a similarity, eh Bertie, afternoon afternoon
(12:33):
to you.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
To judge.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
I don't suppose the owner of that goat showed up,
No he didn't.
Speaker 9 (12:37):
He's a powerful, smart man, that man is. However, there
was another man around here looking for to buy that goat.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Well, why didn't you sell it to him? Well, not
supposed I did, and the owner showed up.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
That's how people get their selves into pokey.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
But we have a legal right to sell this animal, now,
haven't we judged?
Speaker 3 (12:53):
That's right.
Speaker 6 (12:54):
The decision was handed down in state of Nebraska versus
two unclaimed guinea pigs, later amended to ask a versus
unspecified number of guinea bag.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
That's fine, judge. Now, Britty, do you remember the name
of the man who wanted to buy that goat? No,
that don't. Oh what a pity.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
But he left his card here?
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Oh his card? Good, let's have thanks you. I'll pick
it up, and never mind, Brady, I'll get it. Look, Gail,
they get up here comes that goat. What you say,
jus goat. Come on.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Here, let me help you out.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
You aren't hurt.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Are you guilty?
Speaker 1 (13:32):
No? No, of course not, judge. I'm just practicing forced landings.
Where is that goat? You better get rid of him.
Speaker 3 (13:40):
That's guilty.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
That's just what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna sell him
right now. Where's that man's card? I dropped? But it
wasn't in the grass a minute ago? Yes, it was
right away. Oh, somebody stopped that goat. Yo, it's too
lady just chewed up the cart with a customer's name.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
We'll hear from the Great jailer sleeve again in just
the moment. But first, I want to spread the good news.
All you busy homemakers will be tickled pink to know
that there is a way to make delicious macaroni and
cheese fast. In fact, you can make fluffy, light macaroni
drenched in cheese goodness in just seven minutes cooking time.
The product called Kraft Dinner holds the secret of this speech.
(14:23):
In every Kraft Dinner package there's a quick cooking macaroni
that needs no baking at all.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Also, some craft grated that.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
In a twinkling gives your grand cheese flavor through and through.
Just seven minutes at the stove, and you have a
marvelous main dish, fluffy, tender macaroni drenched in cheese goodness.
The family will say Kraft dinner is just about the
best macaroni and cheese you ever made, and you will
say Kraft Dinner is a positive treasure on days when
you have to work fast to get luncheon on time,
(14:51):
or for dinners when you've spent the afternoon shopping or
working late on your defense job. So stock the emergency
shelf tomorrow with several packages of Craft dinner. Now let's
(15:12):
return to the great Guildersleeve, who's putting the finishing touches
on a temporary goat pen the hold horse until he
can be sold, given away, or just tied to some
fence and ran from.
Speaker 1 (15:24):
Hell. We a lei roy And there you are, mister goat. Yeah, oh,
but I'm tired. I'm going to take a nap in
the hammick leroy.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
Okay, you take it easy. I'm going on with piggybank
House and see if his mother'll let him take hers.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
All right, Only don't wake me up unless she's foolish
enough to say yes.
Speaker 3 (15:40):
Gee, poor uncle morph he's getting to the eggway. He
can't take these things. Oh my gosh, Dames LeRoi, we've
been looking for you, haven't we.
Speaker 5 (15:50):
Girl.
Speaker 8 (15:51):
That's all right.
Speaker 3 (15:51):
We just come to my birthday lesson.
Speaker 8 (15:53):
We needed this and click the practice on before we
forget everything we learned.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Just now, come on, little man, let us standied you up. No,
I'm going shall the last time you guys wrapped up
my leg.
Speaker 3 (16:02):
My foot was asleep all afternoon. Besides, I gotta see
a lay a bottle ghost. Now it looks like we'll
have to practice on each other. Oh no, let let's
see at thirty here, right, Oh, Bertie, would you like
to come out here and be a victim, a victim
of wasn't miss March circumstances of a broken leg, rain,
burns everything.
Speaker 9 (16:22):
No, ma'am, I have absolutely no inclinations in that direction.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
We just wanna practice first day down you. We're just
gonna pretend that you're hurt.
Speaker 3 (16:30):
Can't you do it just pretending I'm there too.
Speaker 9 (16:32):
I've got a pressing engagement to press that dress you
wants to wear to night.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
But if you want me to leave that to go,
oh no.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
No, no, berdie, No, we'll we'll find someone else. They might.
Speaker 8 (16:41):
Isn't that you hurkle over there in the HAMMOCKA ask he.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Make an overly jolly patience, wouldn't he? I don't know.
Speaker 4 (16:49):
Do you think we've gotten enough bandages to go around?
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Let's go ask him? Come on, well, let's be quiet. Please,
do you mind if we.
Speaker 8 (17:01):
Usual to dummy to practice at first? Seat on and
the kind of nobody else will? And you don't have
to disturb yourself in the least says? We can go
right ahead just the way you are.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
This shoe flies away.
Speaker 3 (17:11):
He's asleep. We shouldn't disturbing dotty if uncome on a sleep.
Speaker 4 (17:15):
I don't think even Dotty can disturb him.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Yeah, do you mean it's all right to proceed?
Speaker 1 (17:21):
Sure, just as.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Long as we don't treat him too roughly or push
him out of the hammock.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
Oh gooddie, I've just been waiting for a chance.
Speaker 8 (17:28):
Like just to practice my journey because now just an'll tell.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
Mister Gilders, well, this would be a good time to
work on chest bands. You no, I'm afraid we'd have
to get him up for that. Well, couldn't I just
roll a bandage around here, Amanda Hammock.
Speaker 3 (17:43):
Oh, yeah, yeah, that would being logical. Well what are
you going to do, Margie? Oh? I think I'll work
on that treatment for burns.
Speaker 4 (17:49):
And rub some of the stab and uncle saith. You'll
probably keep him from getting sunburned too. M ooh, this
Sam is certainly strong.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
Your uncle is certainly a sound sleeper. Yeah, just listen
to that sound.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
I never thought it would take so many mad bandies
as you go around your uncles.
Speaker 3 (18:15):
To come from mart Yeah. That takes him a lot
of territory, doesn't it.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Got what?
Speaker 4 (18:21):
This stuff is sticky and you want to have an
extra handkerchiem just this second and I'll be through then.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
Dolly dumpson, what are you doing to my uncle?
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Who?
Speaker 3 (18:32):
I'm just tightening this turn cat? But good heaven, Dotty,
you never use a tony get on the neck. That's
maybe we better help him sit up. We can't sit up.
(18:53):
He's Dandy's the hammer in that case, we better Oh
my goodness, what's that? Just got one's out?
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Get out?
Speaker 3 (19:05):
You try to just says into the house or him.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
I can't leave Uncle Moore like this. Oh here comes,
I can't get up if who tied me down here? Well,
why'd you do it?
Speaker 9 (19:28):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:28):
It's you. What do you want you get away from me? Oh?
Your nose is cold? Yeah? Quit flicking my face, Horace.
Your beard tickles, mister.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Gilsey, don't you.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
I think you'd better figure out some way to get
rid of that goat, because the animosity against him on
the outside is beginning to penetrate on the inside.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
What do you mean, Bertie, Well, I happen to know
a certain.
Speaker 9 (20:11):
Very reliable and capable cook who has been offered a
most lucrative position in a completely golpeless household.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Oh should I be more pacific? No? No, no, I
think I understand, Bertie. And I'm trying to get rid
of Horrse too.
Speaker 4 (20:25):
Well.
Speaker 1 (20:25):
I sure hope you does it instantaneously too.
Speaker 9 (20:28):
I'm tired of flying a kite from the second floor
every time I got clothed to dry and wear the
skin it whenever I have to bustle out into the yards.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
And you folks ain't had it so.
Speaker 9 (20:39):
Easy either, now, buffet dinners every night standing up.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Well, let's not go into that, Bertie. It's a painful subject.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Excuse me, I'm boy, I didn't know you were.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Here, Come here, young man, Oh meah, of course you, leroy.
Did you have anything to do with Horace chasing the
postman down the street and then eating our morning mails?
Speaker 3 (20:58):
Well, all the indirectly, Uncle Moore. You see, I was
trying to train him to fetch the mail inside every morning,
the way Piggybank's dog does.
Speaker 10 (21:06):
Well.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
He fetched it inside all right, saying we ought to
buy him a muscle. What's the use he'd eat that too.
What we should do is saw off his horns, trim
off his beard, and then tip off the dog catcher.
Speaker 3 (21:26):
Oh you can't do that, uncle more.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
He likes you.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Every time he sees you a look steals into his great, big,
beautiful blue eyes.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Too bad I couldn't see that look. When I was
bending over to find the keyhole last night he knocked
me clear into the sitting room. Now what as if
I didn't know? Yes, that's me. I'm from the city Hall.
Speaker 10 (21:50):
Do you keep a goat on these premises and violations
the city's owning coat?
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Of course you do. I can see him from here.
Speaker 10 (21:54):
You down, Elisa, to conduct the goat Darry has provided
for in the civil statues of the state. I thought,
nut as a has had go proven the nuisance, diserver
of the peace and menace of life, limb and real
estate values. I thought as much better get rid of it,
one skilleder sleeve. That goat is putting into everybody's business today.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
All right, that's enough of meat. Get your cat ley, Roy,
and come along.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
Okay, where are we going?
Speaker 1 (22:16):
You heard the man. We're gonna take that backyard battering
ram out of the country and get rid of him. Hey, here, horse,
come on, nice little goat. Sure you lead him around
to the car leroy.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
All right, careful, Lucky, you'll type your shoelaces on time.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Lace on time. Oh thank you, I've got to pick
it out.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
Oh forget, I'm kicking TRD.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
I don't see him where I fooled him that time.
I'm wearing my air raid warden Healbert where he'll do
the most good.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
Let's play that for him up ahead, the farmer.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Oh yes, but this is all right, Stop me, Roy.
I never thought there were so many goat haters in
this part of the country. Hello there, neighbor, Hello there,
how would you like to buy a dandy go to
the cheap price? No, no, thank you, yanker. Mane.
Speaker 3 (23:19):
Why not?
Speaker 6 (23:21):
It's goats's too stoborn.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
They're used blank yeahs, sir, But just look at this animal.
He's a genuine gym, a genuine jim. He looked more
like a york You can have him for only two dollars.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
No, No, too high?
Speaker 1 (23:37):
All right, I'm tired of hauling him around the countryside.
You can have him for nothing.
Speaker 6 (23:40):
That's still too high.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Well, and suppose I give you three or four dollars?
How about that for No? You were yashing me. I'm
not yashing you, joshing you? Well, what do you say?
Speaker 3 (23:51):
No?
Speaker 1 (23:52):
But why not?
Speaker 6 (23:53):
That goat is for ten dollars for sure? If you
ask glass something done wrong? Sure you get along now
get off man property. Don't want no dealings, mad hot goat?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Well for the hot?
Speaker 3 (24:06):
Oh hars, what have you done?
Speaker 9 (24:09):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (24:09):
Look at the upholstery in the back seat.
Speaker 1 (24:11):
The upholstery. Where is it? I get away? All right, brother,
this is the end of the line.
Speaker 3 (24:19):
What did that do?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
Open that back door, leroy, and I'll get out of
horse door quickly. Roy, goodbye, yeah, goodbye horse. Well let's
get home, leroy.
Speaker 7 (24:43):
H my goodness, look, we're all a ghastly Roy or
it's getting away from most tires.
Speaker 9 (25:00):
It's seven o'clocks March. You still want to wait dinner
for mister Gilson leaving me royal?
Speaker 3 (25:03):
Oh, yes, Bertie, just a little while longer anyhow. Oh
I do hope they come back without that goat.
Speaker 9 (25:08):
Yes, ma'am, And so does everybody else who's ever come
in contact with him.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Thought to give the devil his dues.
Speaker 9 (25:15):
That heart had the most personality I ever saw in
a goat.
Speaker 3 (25:19):
Too bad?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Was all negative.
Speaker 3 (25:22):
Oh, I don't know what we'll do, say, bring him
back again? Do you think we can hide him someplace
when the neighbors wouldn't find out? No, ma'am.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
They shall get the wind of it somehow.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
I guess you're right, well.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
Bertie, yes, sir.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
How about that horse goat?
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (25:39):
We found out who owned him and gave him back,
you did? Who does he belong to?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
The Summerfield railroad yards?
Speaker 3 (25:44):
A railroad yards? Well, I've heard a donkey.
Speaker 9 (25:47):
And jews and cowcatchers for what the boats do.
Speaker 1 (25:49):
On the railroad. Well it Horace works down at the stockyards.
He leads the sheep out of the pins and into
the box cards.
Speaker 3 (25:55):
Yeah, when he ran away, they thought he'd been shipped
somewhere by mistake.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Yes, they would tear be glad to get him back again,
because it's practically impossible to move the sheep unless he
leads them.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Oh, thank goodness, that's all over. Who said?
Speaker 9 (26:07):
Now if you poke it off, I'll put din on
right away?
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Oh dinner? And if I got an appetite me too,
come on? Come on? Yes, sure you don't know what
a load this is off my shoulders? Why I feel like?
If I feel like something wrong? What's that noise outside?
Speaker 3 (26:23):
You gotta go to the door, uncle, Yes, I'll.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Soon find out.
Speaker 7 (26:29):
Ah quate jumping keeps horse has come back again, and
he's brought all his blue sheep friends with the.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
Great deelous Lave will be with us again in just
a few minutes. Meanwhile, I'd like to mention that macaroni
and cheese is one of America's favorite dishes, and now
Kraft makes it possible for you to prepare this favorite
dish in only seven minutes.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You do it with a product called Kraft Dinner.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
For Kraft Dinner gives you a special quick cooking macaroni
that gets fluffy tender in boiling water in a hurry,
no need to blanch and bake this macaroni. Also on
the Kraft Dinner package is some craft grated that puts
grand cheese flavor into the macaroni. Quick You spend just
seven minutes at the stove to get tender macaroni drenched
in cheese goodness. It's a kitchen miracle that will thrill
(27:30):
you and delight the whole family. Kraft Dinner is a
main dish all by itself, four good servings in every box.
If you serve it molded into a ring and filled
with cream seafood, you have a real party dish in
a jiffy. So don't bother with blanching and baking macaroni anymore.
Don't fuss with grating cheese and making a cream sauce.
Give them grand macaroni and cheese cooked in seven minutes.
(27:53):
Stock up on Kraft Dinner tomorrow, Ladies and gentlemen. In
this war that we're fighting, there are a million stirring
(28:14):
stories of valor and endurance and personal sacrifice. At this
very moment, on every ocean, men of our navy are
writing and heroic page in our.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
History, and in order that they may fight with untroubled hearts,
secure in the knowledge that their loved ones at home
are not in distress. The Navy Relief Society is asking
us to contribute a fund of five million dollars.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
That's right, Marjorie. For forty years, the men of our Navy,
Marine Corps and Coastguard have provided immediate direct relief for
their dependents themselves. But now since Pearl Harbor, the need
has become much greater, and so all of us are
going to have the privilege of helping give.
Speaker 4 (28:50):
Now and give generously, either to your local Navy Relief
Drive or to the Navy Relief Society.
Speaker 3 (28:57):
Seven thirty fifth Avenue, New York City.
Speaker 1 (29:00):
That's right, seven thirty fifth Avenue, New York City. Thank you,
and good night, ladies and gentlemen. Original music heard on
(29:22):
this program was composed and conducted by William Rambo. This
is Jim Bannon's thinking of the Craft Teese Company.
Speaker 2 (29:28):
I'm inviting you to be worked us again next week
at the same time for the further adventures of the
Great Yelders League.
Speaker 1 (29:34):
This program has come to you from Hollywood. This is
the nice little Broadcasting Company
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