October 8, 2023 • 30 mins
More non-sensical clap trap from Tom and Dom.
All of pur episodes can be watched over on our brand new YouTube channel. Just search 'Tom & Dom's Manhood'
All of pur episodes can be watched over on our brand new YouTube channel. Just search 'Tom & Dom's Manhood'
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Man, I need to do some press upsa gear ah
mean knee just add surgery and list. Did he do
some press up quickly?
Speaker 2 (00:28):
You're gonna do some actual press ups now, Yes, you're
gonna excellent boobs. Well hello, while Tom does his last
minute exercises that he thinks he needs for a podcast.
Welcome to is it Episode three?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
You're surprised. Twenty press ups. If you've already got some
pecks hidden, pump them up. I used to go on
nights out with guys who do fifty press ups and
then put the shirt on going and put the Ben
Sherman shirt on going out.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
You're making it sound like you hang around with like
the those strippers, the Chippendale's, which is quite accurate because
we're recording this episode outside in a place called Utley,
and Utley is the home of what Thomas Chippindale, the
famous furniture man, not the Chipping de Hills. No, but
that was a nice segway on it. God, it's so profreshed.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Anyway, Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Welcome, Welcome to this episode of Manhood.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Set the scene down because we are outside.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
We're outside, we've just had fish and chips, we've got
a can of dandelion burdock. If you're watching this on video.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Which is a legal requirement of By the way, is it, Oh.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
It's so good, it's perfect. Actually reminds me grandma.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
Does it? Yeah? Me totally.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Did it ever dawn on you that the name dandy
lion is because that flower looks like a fancy lion,
like a dandy lion. No, way, that's cooling it. I
don't know if that is it, but that's got to
be on.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
It was spelling it. No, they're not a spelling it
like a dandelion or other. Is it actual dondee don
dale lion?
Speaker 2 (01:48):
No, it's dan. If you walk into a fish shop,
have you got any darn dae lion? They're going to
dandelion in it and burdock leaves. What is it?
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Tell you now? The excentary botanical blend of wild and
really dandelions. There's a flying bird.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
There's a lot of long words on there, and not
a single one of them. Ah, dandelion or bird dock.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It literally says done. It's a blend of wild, unruly
dandelions and the purple flowering burdock sounds.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Rather d But when did you know, look at the ingredients.
Look at the ingredients umus literally not lamentest.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
No, you're right, there's nothing the So it's just it's
fake dandelion and bird flavor at this point in it.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
That is quite interesting anyway, tip of the cap to
Ben Shaws.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Ben Shaws.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Anyway, Yeah, so we've just had fish and chips where
the wharf fish shop in OTLiS. Nice fish and chips,
massive portions, ridiculous. This is not sponsored them is.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
We're eating before and you.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Yeah, we're eating before the you're eating food like a midology.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
So it's so excitable in it.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
Not only that, but we're outside roadside and next to
the bins. If again, if you're watching on the video,
you can see right behind me, behind that wooden fence
there is a massive council being. If we peak something
and it smells like rottenfish, the wasp be.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
In sane rounding if it would peak somewhere.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
I've seen a couple of wasps. Good and I know
you're a little bit a little scary cat. Anyway, So
we just wanted to have a this will be a
quick episode, probably because we've had guests on and we've
had a couple of long episodes and.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I've got a full bill full of foods for Ready Forbid.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
But let us know what you what you've thought of
the previous episode is especially you know, we had Neil
Bedford on last week. Fantastic guess, some really interesting stories.
Let us know what you thought. Thanks to everybody that's
reviewed the podcast so far on iTunes and Spotify, it's
getting rave reviews.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
Quite it's good. It's good.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Really, thank you to all of our friends that went
on there and did that for us. So yeah, we're
really like, do.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
A bit of Adam, and we should do that for
every podcast we haven't got a guest, you should do
a bit of Adamin like that.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Yeah, well, I kind of wanted to balance it because
obviously producer Henry is going to be well miffed off
that we've recorded this outside next to a busy road
in Hotly where it's famous for tractors, landre of us
and old motorbikes. It's literally the worst place.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
This is the story I told her that the guy
whould smashed my back camper van. This is shot it
some daggers, mister wormhold.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
I'd love to know what this actually sounds like.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
There's a lot of cars.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Worm Olds garage is a fantastic garriage. I've I've had
my mini, very old school, old school. They don't have
a lift that they've got a big only four. There's
no lift to lift your car up. They go under it.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
It's a pit.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Yeah my garage, but yeah, is always a wonderful town.
Famously the old home of Heartbeat. Yes, that's where they
used the film Heartbeat.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
They be watching heart Beat. I went and went watching
went heart Beat claud green Grass that my memories came
back and I couldn't believe anywhere and as we used
to watch it.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Now, kid should bring me to Otland showing around been
loads and like murders and that on.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Filmed in the middle of Oty.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
No, not all of it, but the police station was
hotly it was Otley Courthouse which is now like a
venue and Rob Beckett played there.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
That's the police station.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Berry was based. Interesting.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
It's very interesting.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
You learn something you every.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Day you do but I don't often got because it's
the middle of nowhere. But don't like, let's do it.
This is this. I reckon There is a reason we
came home.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I reckon in the end because I used to live
in Otly. I reckon in the entire time we've known
it other this might be the third or fourth time
you've been over five minutes.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
It's literally do you know I can go in four
five minutes again?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
That would be a valid argument working not for the
fact I've been over to see you loads of times.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
We're going to go down this route this rabbit hop yes,
because honestly, we'll stand.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Because one bit of feedback, one bit of feedback was
that they love the bickering. So what we're gonna do
is if we're going to do bickering on purpose, now
the whole episode.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
This this is a genuine grievance me and Dom is
the driving thing because I would drive in what ten years?
For ten years? Well done, I've over made up for
that now nowhere. So I used to We used to
drive to Manchester work for the BBC, which by the
way is just off the motorway for me, like go
on the motory straight to Manchester Point. And they used
to drop Dom back off in Otley. And it was
I was adding forty five minutes each way to my journey.
(05:59):
I was adding at the hour and alfter that journey
why the hell did you not say something.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Like if that bringing up the BBC Manchester thing gives
me a horrible feeling?
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Why?
Speaker 2 (06:09):
Because you know what I did. I got offered a
job with Fighting Talk Big shown the BBC at five Live,
and I did one show. I had horrible anxiety and
just never went back.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Why do you have anxiety for a ship you do
we're producing.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
I actually contacted the producer recently about it because I don't.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Know if I don't know if you remember behind the scenes.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
So we've done that, We've done the World Cup thing
for right, answer the question for you behind the scenes,
I wasn't on it. You think I give up that opportunity,
but I mean, this is really horrible. So anyway, I'd
had this horrible like I'm ship, I'm no good at this,
I can't talk to anyone, too scared, not done a
very good job, didn't feel like I'd done much, so
I just made an excuse like, oh, it's too far,
(06:51):
I can't do it anymore. Anyway. It was livid. The
guy that give me the job was fucking fuming well
because and then we bumped into him at a birthday
beare minute and it was awkward, and he said, I
think he was just trying to make it worse for me.
He said, it's a shame that because we were lining
you up. Oh god, and he said, who knows in
(07:12):
the future you could have been a presenter of that
absolutely ruined the party that's in it. Yeah, but I've
contacted him recently, said, look, I went entirely honest with
you before. This is why. I don't know why I
did it, you know, and this is why. And it
was like, oh, it's a shame. We want John Boggs.
You you were super talented.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
A long way ago though.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
But what I was hoping you might say is still
an open wasn't.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
But he's still in Manchester. Yeah, it's a long wait
in it for you.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I do it though now now I can drive and
I couldn't drive at the time.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Oh yeah, so it was true.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
So that was a black But anyway, it is what
it is.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
Don't worry about the past.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Then well, funny you should mention that because I actually
been spent spent a few hours with my ex wife
recently just for Teddy, for Teddy's birthday. We said it
would be really nice, and we do it.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
We do it.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
Every year, but this year we wanted it to be big.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
For him because so what did you go out? So
I took him in the house.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Do you took him shooting?
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Oh? God? So North York Trey is there?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Billion it went clip mate was amazing, theater looked really
good at his class. And then took him for a
Korean barbecue place where there were barbecues and the middle
of the table that was rubbish.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I don't right, So I've been one of those in Korea. Now.
The issue is that you've got gas on or whatever
it is permanently, so the energy costs of each other.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So this is probably why this one was.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
I wish it was like like an electric toil. It
was like it's like an electric blanket or something. It
was like an electric barbecue. It was like an element.
Still there's a lot of money, Yeah, but you got
very much. You cook him pork like thick cuts of
pork belly. So it's taken thirty five minutes to cook
each slic. A terrible idea, terrible idea. But it was fine.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
To leave the heat and all the time.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
And then went to an escape room. And you know what,
I felt so sad because it was. We had such
a nice time.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
So who was it who did the skateroom? You? His
wife and Teddy?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Yeah, we had such a nice time, Like it was nice.
You know, we've not been in that family unit since
we'd split.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Did you get out?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
We did get out and we did work really well.
It was good skate room ever on record, Teddy was
so happy. I was really happy. He just felt nice
to be around it. So then three days of fucking
feeling awful afterwards, going that was so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
I wish did tennys.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Not really, he was very very happy. But he didn't say,
oh no, he's probably fucking more mature than I am.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
No, but what I'm saying is like when I see
them them together, and.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, I didn't say anything like that.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Suppose the top and bottom of this is it's good
that you can still get on.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Yeah, yeah, that was good. I think it's the first
time actually we've been normal with each other that it's
not just being like a he is is his bag
seeing two days.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Our friend who was recently divorced, well not recently divorced,
a while he's actually a friend of a friend to
tell like that's irrelevant. He gets the kids Monday, Tuesday,
Wednesday and that's it. Yes, Thursday's Sunday off. What a
life I know.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
See, I'm always on. I mean we've got a really
fair set up because you know, it will sometimes go
to her, sometimes mine, but it comes to mine every
day after school because I live near school, so I
always give him tea and stuff like that, and I
take him a football and stuff. So I'm always on,
even though it's a kind of a fair share, and.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Also by himself. Can't you if you want to go
to exactly if.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
You had to do something exactly a.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Five year old, I'm going to choose you Wednesday. You
can have the rest of the week. Okay, I could
get in, you know, it's a bit there's an element
that element.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Teddy can't it doesn't really stay over at my parents
because he's got the same thing as me where it's
really hard sleep in a weird bed.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
But it's okay, suss.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Yeah. But it's like they're a lot ay, So it's different.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
Did you do with weekends than it is?
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Rarely it's mostly with me. Can you wear that bottle bank?
Just thinking about busy traffic bottle bag. Sorry if this
is damaging your ears as that was on the Saturday,
which was my birthday.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Actually, and then on the I apologize.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Yeah, that was the second year in a row. I
checked back through messages. Second year in a row. You're
absolute disgrace of a mate. Never comes over to see me.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
Can I forget the check breakthrough my messages considering you've
been hanging off my coattails for ten years, it's fucking disgrace.
Give over the bloody backbone. At this podcasts, you're repeating
yourself every week. Don't tell the story eight times?
Speaker 2 (11:38):
That's ADHD, is it really?
Speaker 1 (11:40):
I think it is here memory like or like this
top of the spectrum in HD.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
But you you severe ADHD. But you you always interrupt
when people are talking, like before they finished, and you
know it's an ADHD trait to finish somebody else's because
you can relate to it, and you you urge they
want to get your story out. So say someone saying
something to you about oh I've got a bad ankle,
yet oh I've got a bad ankle as well. And
it's not because you want to make the story about you.
(12:07):
It's because you can relate to it and you want
them to know, yes, I sympathize with you. We finish,
but it comes across terribly.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
We finished, but like it's an element of for me,
it's impatientness.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Air plane going over another noise to add to them.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
If this is terrible for you, you're in HD these noises.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Yeah it is, yeah, sounds.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
No, that's all sounds.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
No it's not. It's as well anyway, go on. So
it's not a pity podcast.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
So mine is. If someone's telling the story, it's impatience.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Yeah. No, but you've finished it in your head. You've
got to the conclusion before they've got the ide it.
All the time, I'm worse with my mum because my
mum goes around the houses when she's telling a story
and I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Yeah, good to the point, to the point you know
one time is that a month thing? My mum goes
right now.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
One time I was on a walk and Ilkley walk
more with my parents and my mum were telling some
long winded story and I just said, Mum, you've got
to get to the crooks of the story quicker. And
my dad said, don't talk to your mom like that.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Let's just start crying.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
It's horrible, and he said your stories are boring. Lost
his rag with me, and rightly.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
So sides from me, he's like rolling his eyes, going, come.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
On, my dad, my dad doing that behind the that
my dad does sometimes do that, my dad, I said, Mum,
you're so impatient or something.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
In God, No, I'll tell you what though. This is
a slight sort of divergence. But they've got a good
sort of relationship. Banter. Yeah, got that banter. Your mum
and dad have got that little backup forth understand. And
something happened on Friday for me and Abbit, and it
made me think, you know what I actually like Abby?
And I remembered why we've got together and when you
(13:40):
have kids you forget that.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
I mean, that's bad.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So basically it's not imagic.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
What Abby's responsible was when you were drunk half you
know what I actually like you? Because my first thought
would be he's been having doubts about.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
No, no, no, no doubt when you've got kids and you've
got football three times a week and swimming in cricket
and god knows what else in between doing a random
podcast for your mate for no parent reason, when you
when you're so busy. Once you're so busy, you forget
to have time for each other. So when you do
have that time for each other and you're kind of
like one on phones, were talking, went we went to
(14:12):
eight pubs on Friday, and I had a pine in
each and in the ninth publy had two d D
and cooks were absolutely wasted. However, halfway through we were
getting on, you know, having a laugh, having a joke,
and I'm just like, now I know why we actually
got together and why we got married. You kind of
forget that, and I bet there's so many people listening
that can relate.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
No, you do, You totally do. Like when when you're
a couple, you've got two kids and you you're busy,
and life gets on top of you and all that
jazz when you go away, Like if you if you think, oh,
you know what, we've got a weekend, let's go away.
While stay in a hotel room, you can't keep your
hands off each other. You reconnect, You have deep conversations.
You talking about stuff that you don't talk about. You
talk about homies, fucking staying on carpet, who's done that?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Tom? Will you do? Washing up? Tom?
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Are you reflavoring the food I've just cooked for you,
stuff like that. It is literally but that's every I
think that's every.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Couples, every cup bullet.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Standing on the unfortunate positions where we could afford to
do that, there are couples that can't, for they need
to find a way of in the colder.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Now you say that, who were? Like? I said, are
you doing? You see in a couple of years? He said,
I'm staying a hotel tonight, three nights. I went why?
My wife said enough for me? And he was saying
the exact same thing as I'm saying you. He was
saying that basically it's really sad, but basically grown apart
because they've never spent any time together. So I said,
why are you in a hotel? He said, to give
(15:31):
us some space. And I'm like, really interesting because I
know he lives down the road. Went which would tell
you in why you were going to pop around the
best Western what made you choose that one? Well cheapest one?
It so when you go to a relatives house. When
I started to treat myself to an hotel, treat himself
and did you go to his mom and dad's?
Speaker 2 (15:47):
So yeah, I get that. I get that sometimes you
don't want to have to deal with your parents, also saying,
oh what's going on now?
Speaker 1 (15:54):
She done? What have you done? He's got three kids,
so we're a bit older.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
I mean, I don't want to it converts so entirely winning,
is he. But he's got three, like three nights off.
He's getting a break.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Well, she might look at it, that may mate. She
do you know what I did? He quoted me for
a seller, and he went and I were like, sort
you out, you know, just sort you out in a mate,
a mite of a mate. And the quote came in
and he's basically done the opposite of sorting me out.
Here it's chopping with charts. Mean double it fifty grand seller,
as big as this picnic bench. All right, I'll get
(16:27):
that to you. I'll let you know.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Is well, everything's more expensive these days, isn't it? The
cost of stuff? Like we've just had a tom and
I quite like flipping things. So we buy store and
sell trying to be shop. We'll get there, sorry, And
Otley is very good for charity shop. So we had
a look. We looked for like footy shirts and stuff
like that quick stuff that will make us a bit
of Bob, a bit of Bob.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
We can turn a brass.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Like Delboy and Rodney sometimes and anyway, there was nothing,
but there is a twenty p shop. But what we
did with twinty pen shop everything is twenty and you
know what, it's not all ship no, it's there is
some loads of stuff from the eighties and nineties.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
You come with fit out your kitchen, oh lovely and
other noise. You could fit out your what what is that?
Anyways reversing you can fit out your kitchen for about
three pounds sixty The kitchen stuff was unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
If you wanted to make your house look like a
Nutter's house, like a hoarder's house, you could. They would
cast you only cost you a fiver.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
Literally want to like's odd?
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yeah, it's quality though, absoutely love it. And I got
a few pint glasses.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I got some golf books and I stole accidentally stores
two spoons, so putting my pocket then.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Cast forty pences worth of damage.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
I didn't realize they had and these the spoons, I
stole them, but I didn't anyway, I didn't I could
hold them. I put my pocket, I walked out of them.
Now do I go open them up to that?
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Yeah too?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Is that illegal?
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Well we can send them forty p in the post.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
In a twenty p shop.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
He's illegal. You have stole the.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Legal process and taking me to the car. It's not
worth it, not worth forty give them all.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
They're not going to sue.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
You know what I'm saying, It's got to be worth it.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Let's discuss this off my sorry, back to the original point,
which again is another adhd de Triit is like going
off on a tangent and never getting back to your
original point. And we are bad at that. If you
listen to our old podcast, No, I just think you're
like you just don't care.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I actually, oh you have? Do you have? What of
the NOBSI ar has been one of them?
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Clearly can you be diagnosed with arrogance?
Speaker 1 (18:28):
What forgot? I know?
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't think you do. Cabby did ones have a
word in my ear and say I think Tom might
have someone?
Speaker 1 (18:34):
You know, I'm a nice guy.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
M The thing is like we we can be a
bit and again we're going off on a tangent, but
people can be where I know. We spoke about this
a bit with Neil on the last episode. Being northern
and friendly is kind of a great benefit to usn't it,
because we can strike conversation with people nice and home
with people like talking to us. But there is a
flip side of that coin where there's fifty percent of
(18:59):
the population that fuck can hate you.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
That's true.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Like do you remember when we were on the Tube
in London and there were a guy playing football manager? Yeah,
you can't and a guy that he scored and we
cheered and he looked honestly, it looked at us like
you wanted to stab our eyes out.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
You don't do that in London though. You go to
someone in London who's got clearly got a watch on,
you go what the time? Have you got the time?
And they just go, no, you know they've got a watch.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
But back to the original point, charity shops know what
stuff's worth. Nowadays, you can't go in there and get
a pair of two pounds levin comment. They're charging nineteen
ninety nine for Levi. Man, they're getting this stuff for free,
you know what I mean? At what point can.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
You start selling your stuff to charity shops? Yeah, if
they're going to mark it up that much, what.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Is the problem. What so easily distracted? Easily distracted?
Speaker 1 (19:44):
The worst place we could have done this point it is,
but again what meant make saying names. I know someone
who goes into the charity shop in Brighouse and this
is how bad they are. In the Brighouse there's a
designer charity shop works. So they filter out all the
design and gear and said it to the charity shop.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
It's what they do with that.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Shs are more expensive. But my mate, someone I know,
goes down there buys it and he bought this jacket
for forty quid. Right, it was like a barber wax core.
He sold her for four hundred pounds.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
Yeah, that's morally and.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I've told you the story, but it made my mom
take it in. Remember the story.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
He asked your mom?
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Did he like it? Didn't pair those one person with
my mum And it's not him.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Okay, that's disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Anyway, I know your mom, so do I. That were
a weak conversation. Go for a bit of tangentia. Someone said, interesting,
go on, let me just make some notes someone she
turned up to football and one of the other football
dads and I were chatting to her and then she
walked off, wonder for what that came over and went
looked at me eyebrows, who were that? Oh my, you
(20:49):
know what I did?
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Did you tell your mom?
Speaker 1 (20:51):
No?
Speaker 2 (20:51):
No, no, it would be great for content.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
I didn't say it with my mom because I thought,
I want to see where he's going with this. So
that's when I don't know. I was, I think opposition parents,
and they thinking it was a bit like Sinis streaming back,
where is you're going to go with this? She're better?
All right?
Speaker 2 (21:05):
What I was?
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I went?
Speaker 2 (21:07):
My mom went, where the hell did you say that?
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Then I said, I do not know?
Speaker 2 (21:13):
I said, it's like, have you not told your mom that?
Speaker 1 (21:16):
Do you know how good that?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I before? Your mum's confident? I said, My mate fancied.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
It when she get a big head.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
How old you sixty five?
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I don't know how she don't think.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
I don't know how old your mummy is?
Speaker 1 (21:26):
No grace, I know my dad went seventy. My dad's
going seventy. So's your younger? Mum's don't get you younger?
Speaker 2 (21:33):
How much younger?
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Two? Three? Five years old? Your mom? And dad? My dad?
Speaker 2 (21:40):
My dad was born in nineteen sixty, so it's easy
to work.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
He's out.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
He's sixty three. And my mum was born in sixty six,
younger than man fifty seven, younger. My mum had me
when she was twenty almost fifty seven. Yeah, that's young
chad me when she was twenty.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Had a minute, you're you're close to the month you
are to.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
I can hear the cogs ticking and your been what's
going on? She's middle aged, she was not even the
whole fifty seven or middle age.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
She's got a little one.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Hundred and twenty white Oh yeah, picture, look at look
at look a look at mine thirty seven and I'm
going to look like Santa Claus.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
And who is the most attractive? What out of our mums?
Come on, you.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Choke mate, you're that You're you're that person all that
incest pods made for.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
So that's a really weird conversation with some people. Yeah,
they can not match your names, and I oppose it
to you, actually, dom So you have to go to
prison for life, right, you've got good to prison for life?
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Ambulance good like a cophony of sounds you're getting Let
me get.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
This quing down here. You're gonna stop there and someone's.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
Going to die casting back of it.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
So you've got you've got to go to prison. Someone's
got a gun to it. You're going to prison for life.
But you get to choose the you get to choose
the crime.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
But okay, but I'm going to prison. Actually get to
choose the crime.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
So you can choose ever crime you one. However, the
crime has got to have a life sentence. Okay, but
I have to do it. You have to do it.
What you did? Are you dead? I'll die. Don't say die.
I know you're not dead. You've got to do it.
It's just something has happened.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
What would I do?
Speaker 1 (23:20):
Anyway? You know what this pauses to this group of people,
and as quick as a flash, without any thought, and
it was really a bit too quick, really, it just
went murder.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
If he was looking at you, it's going to hurt you.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
That's a bit too quick quick that in But he's
thought about this before.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
But would you would you want to kill? Would you
kill someone that you hear?
Speaker 1 (23:42):
Well, well it got me thinking you could you could
do what's it called when you kill a famous person
like a president of the summer.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Assassination asassination I don't think they've got to be famous.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Have thing? Well, no, I think they have. If you
if you just kill a blooming homeless person, it's not
assassination of the homeless person.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
I think it's I think it is.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Assassination in the assassinations of someone who's highly important. Let's
get to your point anyway, cuting, Oh yeah, there you go,
that's your answer.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
But there's that famous Ricky joking about Hitler where he says,
would you go back and kill baby Hitler? And he
gets a picture up of baby Hitler and he's a
really cute little baby. Would you And he says, would
you kill him?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
What I do is I'd adopt him and change his path,
change his path.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
It's a good idea, But then you could have the
butterfly effect and then.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Knock on as somebody else. Always be a puting do
you know? Do you ever think what you're doing? What's
your answer?
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I'd kill a Pauty.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
You can't make mind. He's got some different but that's
a good one. So when someone else went, I'd kill
Jacob rees morg specific.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
That's a weird one.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Politics.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I don't think. I don't think that i'd change enough
Jacob Brice mog I don't think he's effected as effective
as people think. Is is like elitist.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Really weird.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Oh I had a really good I was getting onto
some important there, but I've lost it. Now What did
I say?
Speaker 1 (25:03):
Don't if you rewind it? I don't know. I thought
my question was really good.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Do you ever think about we're very lucky that there's
not been a war? So obviously there was World War One,
World War two? This country had to put up with it.
There was all like yeah people what it called when
you got sent to the countryside, immigration evacuee. There was
evacuee's ration in places getting bombed. We've not had to
(25:28):
experience that, I generate. In fact, there hasn't been a
war in this country since ninety forty five. That could
happen that you think we're just protected in this but
like it will never happen now totally. Could COVID proved
that we can be under the cost I've done that
phone on you, that thing on your phone where it's
enduring an emergency, Yeah, nationally, So that's the new aread siren,
isn't it. Yeah? But that could we could go to
(25:51):
war and see our countries start getting bombed, you'd have
to go.
Speaker 1 (25:54):
I won't be able to medical reasons, flat feet ahd. No,
I think you wouldn't be a constitute on your job
in hand, I'm shoot shooting.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I'm really good at creative stuff. Do you need any
posters doing? I'll do the marketing plan for the invasion,
I'll do a podcast about it. But it's the way
you totally think. But it could happen.
Speaker 1 (26:17):
Honestly, can you imagine me going a war? No, exactly,
you'd be.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Like it's dix a biscuit, wherever the sausages.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
No, I don't think. I don't think you have food charges.
Look at how many euros supermarkets are there? Food insane.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Production would stop, there'd be no there'll be no processed food.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Have you seen him? Like all these drug fronted shots
and newsagents that sell prime and.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Well, you're gonna live off sugar, You're gonna you're gonna
live off fake American swite.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
What I'm saying is back in the in the wartime
that's good and existed with corner shops.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
And what's tonight mon gob stoppers.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
You can't do that. Juli Ranchers from those.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
They'd survive and you kill a blast though, right?
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Is that? I say that? Right?
Speaker 2 (27:04):
You know you've not asked me about my knee surgery.
I've had knee surgery. I'm not once focused to me
by how's it going?
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Book about last week? We didn't went Neil Bedford, didn't
we then didn't ask me about it? Come on, then
open up. It's fine. Actually like that knee, it's actually
weirdly healed. Unbelievable medical marvel, what do the dogs are?
Speaker 2 (27:23):
You were Marvel of science?
Speaker 1 (27:26):
It just took my word.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
No, I didn't say it differently because because weird, Like
I'm pretty sure they've cut a nerve or something.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, so you can't feel it, but the wounds.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Are pretty much healed.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Now.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
I got to get signed off for work tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Hopefully. That's really good. When I first saw you, obviously
you've been hobbling a lot, and I'm like, oh, he's
going to be on crutches, but you're like completely cut free.
I mean that were a few weeks after. I was
pushing it a little bit. Don't the say it's supposed
to be a month's recovery.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
Well, I'm not going to be able to play five aside.
Next week, I still got to do nine months of
physio and stuff like.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
That and just sort of taken your hamstring.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
I've run out. So it's the third time I've had
my cruciate ligament reconstruct me. I've got a donor. There's
a bit of somebody else in the dead guy, she said,
and it's ament, and it feels so solid.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I don't want to like a link for Christie like incarnation,
So hopefully could you see could you find out whose
it was?
Speaker 2 (28:25):
I don't they get processed and they've got some big
factory in Switzerland with America or something with the dead.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
Dead.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
It's interesting that you should be the one that repeats
the story.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
No, but I think it was prior, wasn't it.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
But it feels amazing. My surgeon was class and I'm
lucky that I get really good medical insurance. So I've
got it done privately. And the company that provided the
ligament sent me a really expensive machine that pumps ice
water around man knee. It's called no no, no, it's
like a strap you put around it. It's called like
(29:02):
a cryotherapy machine. He sent me for nothing.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Can I borrow that? No?
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yeah, of course you can.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Will know from my ankle, right, you can.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
You've got to buy it's like modular, so you'd have
to buy the ankle strap. I've got the knee strap.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
All right, obviously it's modular.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Chance nobody is made in America.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Not much being in America.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
Anyway, we're tailing off, so I think that might be
the end of the episode an hour.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Let me just give my notes. We're not so over there.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
Well, we've done it. We've done a good time.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
Yeah, that's it. I'm done.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Thanks, thanks for listening. Please, if you are a listener,
or even if you're not, leave us a five star
review on Spotify or.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Five star is it? No, no, no, you will take
a four if you think about one star review that.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
But yeah, your reviews are really important to pushing us
to new audiences and make sure you subscribed and all
that jazz. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
The message where did you read them out? We might
we get more people to messages in.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Yeah, but they're all like really like saying how great
we are, and that feels boastful. Anyway, we'll see you
next time.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Read them out.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Hopefully we'll have a guest because we'll send some text
messages around.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I want to hear them.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
They're rant enough to make it into a section HM
Man, I need to do some press upsa gear ah
mean knee just add surgery and list. Did he do
some press up quickly?
Speaker 2 (00:28):
You're gonna do some actual press ups now, Yes, you're
gonna excellent boobs. Well hello, while Tom does his last
minute exercises that he thinks he needs for a podcast.
Welcome to is it Episode three?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
You're surprised. Twenty press ups. If you've already got some
pecks hidden, pump them up. I used to go on
nights out with guys who do fifty press ups and
then put the shirt on going and put the Ben
Sherman shirt on going out.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
You're making it sound like you hang around with like
the those strippers, the Chippendale's, which is quite accurate because
we're recording this episode outside in a place called Utley,
and Utley is the home of what Thomas Chippindale, the
famous furniture man, not the Chipping de Hills. No, but
that was a nice segway on it. God, it's so profreshed.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Anyway, Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Welcome, Welcome to this episode of Manhood.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Set the scene down because we are outside.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
We're outside, we've just had fish and chips, we've got
a can of dandelion burdock. If you're watching this on video.
Speaker 1 (01:22):
Which is a legal requirement of By the way, is it, Oh.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
It's so good, it's perfect. Actually reminds me grandma.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
Does it? Yeah? Me totally.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Did it ever dawn on you that the name dandy
lion is because that flower looks like a fancy lion,
like a dandy lion. No, way, that's cooling it. I
don't know if that is it, but that's got to
be on.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
It was spelling it. No, they're not a spelling it
like a dandelion or other. Is it actual dondee don
dale lion?
Speaker 2 (01:48):
No, it's dan. If you walk into a fish shop,
have you got any darn dae lion? They're going to
dandelion in it and burdock leaves. What is it?
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Tell you now? The excentary botanical blend of wild and
really dandelions. There's a flying bird.
Speaker 2 (02:05):
There's a lot of long words on there, and not
a single one of them. Ah, dandelion or bird dock.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
It literally says done. It's a blend of wild, unruly
dandelions and the purple flowering burdock sounds.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Rather d But when did you know, look at the ingredients.
Look at the ingredients umus literally not lamentest.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
No, you're right, there's nothing the So it's just it's
fake dandelion and bird flavor at this point in it.
Speaker 2 (02:30):
That is quite interesting anyway, tip of the cap to
Ben Shaws.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Ben Shaws.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Anyway, Yeah, so we've just had fish and chips where
the wharf fish shop in OTLiS. Nice fish and chips,
massive portions, ridiculous. This is not sponsored them is.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
We're eating before and you.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Yeah, we're eating before the you're eating food like a midology.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
So it's so excitable in it.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
Not only that, but we're outside roadside and next to
the bins. If again, if you're watching on the video,
you can see right behind me, behind that wooden fence
there is a massive council being. If we peak something
and it smells like rottenfish, the wasp be.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
In sane rounding if it would peak somewhere.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
I've seen a couple of wasps. Good and I know
you're a little bit a little scary cat. Anyway, So
we just wanted to have a this will be a
quick episode, probably because we've had guests on and we've
had a couple of long episodes and.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I've got a full bill full of foods for Ready Forbid.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
But let us know what you what you've thought of
the previous episode is especially you know, we had Neil
Bedford on last week. Fantastic guess, some really interesting stories.
Let us know what you thought. Thanks to everybody that's
reviewed the podcast so far on iTunes and Spotify, it's
getting rave reviews.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
Quite it's good. It's good.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
Really, thank you to all of our friends that went
on there and did that for us. So yeah, we're
really like, do.
Speaker 1 (03:45):
A bit of Adam, and we should do that for
every podcast we haven't got a guest, you should do
a bit of Adamin like that.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Yeah, well, I kind of wanted to balance it because
obviously producer Henry is going to be well miffed off
that we've recorded this outside next to a busy road
in Hotly where it's famous for tractors, landre of us
and old motorbikes. It's literally the worst place.
Speaker 1 (04:04):
This is the story I told her that the guy
whould smashed my back camper van. This is shot it
some daggers, mister wormhold.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
I'd love to know what this actually sounds like.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
There's a lot of cars.
Speaker 2 (04:16):
Worm Olds garage is a fantastic garriage. I've I've had
my mini, very old school, old school. They don't have
a lift that they've got a big only four. There's
no lift to lift your car up. They go under it.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
It's a pit.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
Yeah my garage, but yeah, is always a wonderful town.
Famously the old home of Heartbeat. Yes, that's where they
used the film Heartbeat.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
They be watching heart Beat. I went and went watching
went heart Beat claud green Grass that my memories came
back and I couldn't believe anywhere and as we used
to watch it.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Now, kid should bring me to Otland showing around been
loads and like murders and that on.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
Filmed in the middle of Oty.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
No, not all of it, but the police station was
hotly it was Otley Courthouse which is now like a
venue and Rob Beckett played there.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
That's the police station.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Berry was based. Interesting.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
It's very interesting.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
You learn something you every.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Day you do but I don't often got because it's
the middle of nowhere. But don't like, let's do it.
This is this. I reckon There is a reason we
came home.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I reckon in the end because I used to live
in Otly. I reckon in the entire time we've known
it other this might be the third or fourth time
you've been over five minutes.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
It's literally do you know I can go in four
five minutes again?
Speaker 2 (05:20):
That would be a valid argument working not for the
fact I've been over to see you loads of times.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
We're going to go down this route this rabbit hop yes,
because honestly, we'll stand.
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Because one bit of feedback, one bit of feedback was
that they love the bickering. So what we're gonna do
is if we're going to do bickering on purpose, now
the whole episode.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
This this is a genuine grievance me and Dom is
the driving thing because I would drive in what ten years?
For ten years? Well done, I've over made up for
that now nowhere. So I used to We used to
drive to Manchester work for the BBC, which by the
way is just off the motorway for me, like go
on the motory straight to Manchester Point. And they used
to drop Dom back off in Otley. And it was
I was adding forty five minutes each way to my journey.
(05:59):
I was adding at the hour and alfter that journey
why the hell did you not say something.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
Like if that bringing up the BBC Manchester thing gives
me a horrible feeling?
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Why?
Speaker 2 (06:09):
Because you know what I did. I got offered a
job with Fighting Talk Big shown the BBC at five Live,
and I did one show. I had horrible anxiety and
just never went back.
Speaker 1 (06:21):
Why do you have anxiety for a ship you do
we're producing.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
I actually contacted the producer recently about it because I don't.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Know if I don't know if you remember behind the scenes.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
So we've done that, We've done the World Cup thing
for right, answer the question for you behind the scenes,
I wasn't on it. You think I give up that opportunity,
but I mean, this is really horrible. So anyway, I'd
had this horrible like I'm ship, I'm no good at this,
I can't talk to anyone, too scared, not done a
very good job, didn't feel like I'd done much, so
I just made an excuse like, oh, it's too far,
(06:51):
I can't do it anymore. Anyway. It was livid. The
guy that give me the job was fucking fuming well
because and then we bumped into him at a birthday
beare minute and it was awkward, and he said, I
think he was just trying to make it worse for me.
He said, it's a shame that because we were lining
you up. Oh god, and he said, who knows in
(07:12):
the future you could have been a presenter of that
absolutely ruined the party that's in it. Yeah, but I've
contacted him recently, said, look, I went entirely honest with
you before. This is why. I don't know why I
did it, you know, and this is why. And it
was like, oh, it's a shame. We want John Boggs.
You you were super talented.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
A long way ago though.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
But what I was hoping you might say is still
an open wasn't.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
But he's still in Manchester. Yeah, it's a long wait
in it for you.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
I do it though now now I can drive and
I couldn't drive at the time.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Oh yeah, so it was true.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
So that was a black But anyway, it is what
it is.
Speaker 1 (07:48):
Don't worry about the past.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
Then well, funny you should mention that because I actually
been spent spent a few hours with my ex wife
recently just for Teddy, for Teddy's birthday. We said it
would be really nice, and we do it.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
We do it.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
Every year, but this year we wanted it to be big.
Speaker 1 (08:04):
For him because so what did you go out? So
I took him in the house.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Do you took him shooting?
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Oh? God? So North York Trey is there?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Billion it went clip mate was amazing, theater looked really
good at his class. And then took him for a
Korean barbecue place where there were barbecues and the middle
of the table that was rubbish.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I don't right, So I've been one of those in Korea. Now.
The issue is that you've got gas on or whatever
it is permanently, so the energy costs of each other.
Speaker 2 (08:33):
So this is probably why this one was.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
I wish it was like like an electric toil. It
was like it's like an electric blanket or something. It
was like an electric barbecue. It was like an element.
Still there's a lot of money, Yeah, but you got
very much. You cook him pork like thick cuts of
pork belly. So it's taken thirty five minutes to cook
each slic. A terrible idea, terrible idea. But it was fine.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
To leave the heat and all the time.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
And then went to an escape room. And you know what,
I felt so sad because it was. We had such
a nice time.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
So who was it who did the skateroom? You? His
wife and Teddy?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
Yeah, we had such a nice time, Like it was nice.
You know, we've not been in that family unit since
we'd split.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Did you get out?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
We did get out and we did work really well.
It was good skate room ever on record, Teddy was
so happy. I was really happy. He just felt nice
to be around it. So then three days of fucking
feeling awful afterwards, going that was so nice.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
I wish did tennys.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Not really, he was very very happy. But he didn't say,
oh no, he's probably fucking more mature than I am.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
No, but what I'm saying is like when I see
them them together, and.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
No, I didn't say anything like that.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Suppose the top and bottom of this is it's good
that you can still get on.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Yeah, yeah, that was good. I think it's the first
time actually we've been normal with each other that it's
not just being like a he is is his bag
seeing two days.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Our friend who was recently divorced, well not recently divorced,
a while he's actually a friend of a friend to
tell like that's irrelevant. He gets the kids Monday, Tuesday,
Wednesday and that's it. Yes, Thursday's Sunday off. What a
life I know.
Speaker 2 (10:07):
See, I'm always on. I mean we've got a really
fair set up because you know, it will sometimes go
to her, sometimes mine, but it comes to mine every
day after school because I live near school, so I
always give him tea and stuff like that, and I
take him a football and stuff. So I'm always on,
even though it's a kind of a fair share, and.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Also by himself. Can't you if you want to go
to exactly if.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
You had to do something exactly a.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Five year old, I'm going to choose you Wednesday. You
can have the rest of the week. Okay, I could
get in, you know, it's a bit there's an element
that element.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Teddy can't it doesn't really stay over at my parents
because he's got the same thing as me where it's
really hard sleep in a weird bed.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
But it's okay, suss.
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Yeah. But it's like they're a lot ay, So it's different.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
Did you do with weekends than it is?
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Rarely it's mostly with me. Can you wear that bottle bank?
Just thinking about busy traffic bottle bag. Sorry if this
is damaging your ears as that was on the Saturday,
which was my birthday.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Actually, and then on the I apologize.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Yeah, that was the second year in a row. I
checked back through messages. Second year in a row. You're
absolute disgrace of a mate. Never comes over to see me.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
Can I forget the check breakthrough my messages considering you've
been hanging off my coattails for ten years, it's fucking disgrace.
Give over the bloody backbone. At this podcasts, you're repeating
yourself every week. Don't tell the story eight times?
Speaker 2 (11:38):
That's ADHD, is it really?
Speaker 1 (11:40):
I think it is here memory like or like this
top of the spectrum in HD.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
But you you severe ADHD. But you you always interrupt
when people are talking, like before they finished, and you
know it's an ADHD trait to finish somebody else's because
you can relate to it, and you you urge they
want to get your story out. So say someone saying
something to you about oh I've got a bad ankle,
yet oh I've got a bad ankle as well. And
it's not because you want to make the story about you.
(12:07):
It's because you can relate to it and you want
them to know, yes, I sympathize with you. We finish,
but it comes across terribly.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
We finished, but like it's an element of for me,
it's impatientness.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Air plane going over another noise to add to them.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
If this is terrible for you, you're in HD these noises.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Yeah it is, yeah, sounds.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
No, that's all sounds.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
No it's not. It's as well anyway, go on. So
it's not a pity podcast.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
So mine is. If someone's telling the story, it's impatience.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
Yeah. No, but you've finished it in your head. You've
got to the conclusion before they've got the ide it.
All the time, I'm worse with my mum because my
mum goes around the houses when she's telling a story
and I'm like, yep, yep, yep, yep, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Yeah, good to the point, to the point you know
one time is that a month thing? My mum goes
right now.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
One time I was on a walk and Ilkley walk
more with my parents and my mum were telling some
long winded story and I just said, Mum, you've got
to get to the crooks of the story quicker. And
my dad said, don't talk to your mom like that.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Let's just start crying.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
It's horrible, and he said your stories are boring. Lost
his rag with me, and rightly.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
So sides from me, he's like rolling his eyes, going, come.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
On, my dad, my dad doing that behind the that
my dad does sometimes do that, my dad, I said, Mum,
you're so impatient or something.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
In God, No, I'll tell you what though. This is
a slight sort of divergence. But they've got a good
sort of relationship. Banter. Yeah, got that banter. Your mum
and dad have got that little backup forth understand. And
something happened on Friday for me and Abbit, and it
made me think, you know what I actually like Abby?
And I remembered why we've got together and when you
(13:40):
have kids you forget that.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
I mean, that's bad.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
So basically it's not imagic.
Speaker 2 (13:43):
What Abby's responsible was when you were drunk half you
know what I actually like you? Because my first thought
would be he's been having doubts about.
Speaker 1 (13:51):
No, no, no, no doubt when you've got kids and you've
got football three times a week and swimming in cricket
and god knows what else in between doing a random
podcast for your mate for no parent reason, when you
when you're so busy. Once you're so busy, you forget
to have time for each other. So when you do
have that time for each other and you're kind of
like one on phones, were talking, went we went to
(14:12):
eight pubs on Friday, and I had a pine in
each and in the ninth publy had two d D
and cooks were absolutely wasted. However, halfway through we were
getting on, you know, having a laugh, having a joke,
and I'm just like, now I know why we actually
got together and why we got married. You kind of
forget that, and I bet there's so many people listening
that can relate.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
No, you do, You totally do. Like when when you're
a couple, you've got two kids and you you're busy,
and life gets on top of you and all that
jazz when you go away, Like if you if you think, oh,
you know what, we've got a weekend, let's go away.
While stay in a hotel room, you can't keep your
hands off each other. You reconnect, You have deep conversations.
You talking about stuff that you don't talk about. You
talk about homies, fucking staying on carpet, who's done that?
Speaker 1 (14:52):
Tom? Will you do? Washing up? Tom?
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Are you reflavoring the food I've just cooked for you,
stuff like that. It is literally but that's every I
think that's every.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Couples, every cup bullet.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Standing on the unfortunate positions where we could afford to
do that, there are couples that can't, for they need
to find a way of in the colder.
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Now you say that, who were? Like? I said, are
you doing? You see in a couple of years? He said,
I'm staying a hotel tonight, three nights. I went why?
My wife said enough for me? And he was saying
the exact same thing as I'm saying you. He was
saying that basically it's really sad, but basically grown apart
because they've never spent any time together. So I said,
why are you in a hotel? He said, to give
(15:31):
us some space. And I'm like, really interesting because I
know he lives down the road. Went which would tell
you in why you were going to pop around the
best Western what made you choose that one? Well cheapest one?
It so when you go to a relatives house. When
I started to treat myself to an hotel, treat himself
and did you go to his mom and dad's?
Speaker 2 (15:47):
So yeah, I get that. I get that sometimes you
don't want to have to deal with your parents, also saying,
oh what's going on now?
Speaker 1 (15:54):
She done? What have you done? He's got three kids,
so we're a bit older.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
I mean, I don't want to it converts so entirely winning,
is he. But he's got three, like three nights off.
He's getting a break.
Speaker 1 (16:07):
Well, she might look at it, that may mate. She
do you know what I did? He quoted me for
a seller, and he went and I were like, sort
you out, you know, just sort you out in a mate,
a mite of a mate. And the quote came in
and he's basically done the opposite of sorting me out.
Here it's chopping with charts. Mean double it fifty grand seller,
as big as this picnic bench. All right, I'll get
(16:27):
that to you. I'll let you know.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
Is well, everything's more expensive these days, isn't it? The
cost of stuff? Like we've just had a tom and
I quite like flipping things. So we buy store and
sell trying to be shop. We'll get there, sorry, And
Otley is very good for charity shop. So we had
a look. We looked for like footy shirts and stuff
like that quick stuff that will make us a bit
of Bob, a bit of Bob.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
We can turn a brass.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Like Delboy and Rodney sometimes and anyway, there was nothing,
but there is a twenty p shop. But what we
did with twinty pen shop everything is twenty and you
know what, it's not all ship no, it's there is
some loads of stuff from the eighties and nineties.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
You come with fit out your kitchen, oh lovely and
other noise. You could fit out your what what is that?
Anyways reversing you can fit out your kitchen for about
three pounds sixty The kitchen stuff was unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
If you wanted to make your house look like a
Nutter's house, like a hoarder's house, you could. They would
cast you only cost you a fiver.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
Literally want to like's odd?
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yeah, it's quality though, absoutely love it. And I got
a few pint glasses.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
I got some golf books and I stole accidentally stores
two spoons, so putting my pocket then.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
Cast forty pences worth of damage.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
I didn't realize they had and these the spoons, I
stole them, but I didn't anyway, I didn't I could
hold them. I put my pocket, I walked out of them.
Now do I go open them up to that?
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Yeah too?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Is that illegal?
Speaker 2 (17:48):
Well we can send them forty p in the post.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
In a twenty p shop.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
He's illegal. You have stole the.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Legal process and taking me to the car. It's not
worth it, not worth forty give them all.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
They're not going to sue.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
You know what I'm saying, It's got to be worth it.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Let's discuss this off my sorry, back to the original point,
which again is another adhd de Triit is like going
off on a tangent and never getting back to your
original point. And we are bad at that. If you
listen to our old podcast, No, I just think you're
like you just don't care.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
I actually, oh you have? Do you have? What of
the NOBSI ar has been one of them?
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Clearly can you be diagnosed with arrogance?
Speaker 1 (18:28):
What forgot? I know?
Speaker 2 (18:30):
I don't think you do. Cabby did ones have a
word in my ear and say I think Tom might
have someone?
Speaker 1 (18:34):
You know, I'm a nice guy.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
M The thing is like we we can be a
bit and again we're going off on a tangent, but
people can be where I know. We spoke about this
a bit with Neil on the last episode. Being northern
and friendly is kind of a great benefit to usn't it,
because we can strike conversation with people nice and home
with people like talking to us. But there is a
flip side of that coin where there's fifty percent of
(18:59):
the population that fuck can hate you.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
That's true.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
Like do you remember when we were on the Tube
in London and there were a guy playing football manager? Yeah,
you can't and a guy that he scored and we
cheered and he looked honestly, it looked at us like
you wanted to stab our eyes out.
Speaker 1 (19:12):
You don't do that in London though. You go to
someone in London who's got clearly got a watch on,
you go what the time? Have you got the time?
And they just go, no, you know they've got a watch.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
But back to the original point, charity shops know what
stuff's worth. Nowadays, you can't go in there and get
a pair of two pounds levin comment. They're charging nineteen
ninety nine for Levi. Man, they're getting this stuff for free,
you know what I mean? At what point can.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
You start selling your stuff to charity shops? Yeah, if
they're going to mark it up that much, what.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Is the problem. What so easily distracted? Easily distracted?
Speaker 1 (19:44):
The worst place we could have done this point it is,
but again what meant make saying names. I know someone
who goes into the charity shop in Brighouse and this
is how bad they are. In the Brighouse there's a
designer charity shop works. So they filter out all the
design and gear and said it to the charity shop.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
It's what they do with that.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Shs are more expensive. But my mate, someone I know,
goes down there buys it and he bought this jacket
for forty quid. Right, it was like a barber wax core.
He sold her for four hundred pounds.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
Yeah, that's morally and.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
I've told you the story, but it made my mom
take it in. Remember the story.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
He asked your mom?
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Did he like it? Didn't pair those one person with
my mum And it's not him.
Speaker 2 (20:26):
Okay, that's disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Anyway, I know your mom, so do I. That were
a weak conversation. Go for a bit of tangentia. Someone said, interesting,
go on, let me just make some notes someone she
turned up to football and one of the other football
dads and I were chatting to her and then she
walked off, wonder for what that came over and went
looked at me eyebrows, who were that? Oh my, you
(20:49):
know what I did?
Speaker 2 (20:50):
Did you tell your mom?
Speaker 1 (20:51):
No?
Speaker 2 (20:51):
No, no, it would be great for content.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
I didn't say it with my mom because I thought,
I want to see where he's going with this. So
that's when I don't know. I was, I think opposition parents,
and they thinking it was a bit like Sinis streaming back,
where is you're going to go with this? She're better?
All right?
Speaker 2 (21:05):
What I was?
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I went?
Speaker 2 (21:07):
My mom went, where the hell did you say that?
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Then I said, I do not know?
Speaker 2 (21:13):
I said, it's like, have you not told your mom that?
Speaker 1 (21:16):
Do you know how good that?
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I before? Your mum's confident? I said, My mate fancied.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
It when she get a big head.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
How old you sixty five?
Speaker 1 (21:24):
I don't know how she don't think.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
I don't know how old your mummy is?
Speaker 1 (21:26):
No grace, I know my dad went seventy. My dad's
going seventy. So's your younger? Mum's don't get you younger?
Speaker 2 (21:33):
How much younger?
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Two? Three? Five years old? Your mom? And dad? My dad?
Speaker 2 (21:40):
My dad was born in nineteen sixty, so it's easy
to work.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
He's out.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
He's sixty three. And my mum was born in sixty six,
younger than man fifty seven, younger. My mum had me
when she was twenty almost fifty seven. Yeah, that's young
chad me when she was twenty.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Had a minute, you're you're close to the month you
are to.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
I can hear the cogs ticking and your been what's
going on? She's middle aged, she was not even the
whole fifty seven or middle age.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
She's got a little one.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Hundred and twenty white Oh yeah, picture, look at look
at look a look at mine thirty seven and I'm
going to look like Santa Claus.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
And who is the most attractive? What out of our mums?
Come on, you.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Choke mate, you're that You're you're that person all that
incest pods made for.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
So that's a really weird conversation with some people. Yeah,
they can not match your names, and I oppose it
to you, actually, dom So you have to go to
prison for life, right, you've got good to prison for life?
Speaker 2 (22:45):
Ambulance good like a cophony of sounds you're getting Let
me get.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
This quing down here. You're gonna stop there and someone's.
Speaker 2 (22:53):
Going to die casting back of it.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
So you've got you've got to go to prison. Someone's
got a gun to it. You're going to prison for life.
But you get to choose the you get to choose
the crime.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
But okay, but I'm going to prison. Actually get to
choose the crime.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
So you can choose ever crime you one. However, the
crime has got to have a life sentence. Okay, but
I have to do it. You have to do it.
What you did? Are you dead? I'll die. Don't say die.
I know you're not dead. You've got to do it.
It's just something has happened.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
What would I do?
Speaker 1 (23:20):
Anyway? You know what this pauses to this group of people,
and as quick as a flash, without any thought, and
it was really a bit too quick, really, it just
went murder.
Speaker 2 (23:31):
If he was looking at you, it's going to hurt you.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
That's a bit too quick quick that in But he's
thought about this before.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
But would you would you want to kill? Would you
kill someone that you hear?
Speaker 1 (23:42):
Well, well it got me thinking you could you could
do what's it called when you kill a famous person
like a president of the summer.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Assassination asassination I don't think they've got to be famous.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Have thing? Well, no, I think they have. If you
if you just kill a blooming homeless person, it's not
assassination of the homeless person.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
I think it's I think it is.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Assassination in the assassinations of someone who's highly important. Let's
get to your point anyway, cuting, Oh yeah, there you go,
that's your answer.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
But there's that famous Ricky joking about Hitler where he says,
would you go back and kill baby Hitler? And he
gets a picture up of baby Hitler and he's a
really cute little baby. Would you And he says, would
you kill him?
Speaker 1 (24:21):
What I do is I'd adopt him and change his path,
change his path.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
It's a good idea, But then you could have the
butterfly effect and then.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Knock on as somebody else. Always be a puting do
you know? Do you ever think what you're doing? What's
your answer?
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I'd kill a Pauty.
Speaker 1 (24:36):
You can't make mind. He's got some different but that's
a good one. So when someone else went, I'd kill
Jacob rees morg specific.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
That's a weird one.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
Politics.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I don't think. I don't think that i'd change enough
Jacob Brice mog I don't think he's effected as effective
as people think. Is is like elitist.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Really weird.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Oh I had a really good I was getting onto
some important there, but I've lost it. Now What did
I say?
Speaker 1 (25:03):
Don't if you rewind it? I don't know. I thought
my question was really good.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Do you ever think about we're very lucky that there's
not been a war? So obviously there was World War One,
World War two? This country had to put up with it.
There was all like yeah people what it called when
you got sent to the countryside, immigration evacuee. There was
evacuee's ration in places getting bombed. We've not had to
(25:28):
experience that, I generate. In fact, there hasn't been a
war in this country since ninety forty five. That could
happen that you think we're just protected in this but
like it will never happen now totally. Could COVID proved
that we can be under the cost I've done that
phone on you, that thing on your phone where it's
enduring an emergency, Yeah, nationally, So that's the new aread siren,
isn't it. Yeah? But that could we could go to
(25:51):
war and see our countries start getting bombed, you'd have
to go.
Speaker 1 (25:54):
I won't be able to medical reasons, flat feet ahd. No,
I think you wouldn't be a constitute on your job
in hand, I'm shoot shooting.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
I'm really good at creative stuff. Do you need any
posters doing? I'll do the marketing plan for the invasion,
I'll do a podcast about it. But it's the way
you totally think. But it could happen.
Speaker 1 (26:17):
Honestly, can you imagine me going a war? No, exactly,
you'd be.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
Like it's dix a biscuit, wherever the sausages.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
No, I don't think. I don't think you have food charges.
Look at how many euros supermarkets are there? Food insane.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Production would stop, there'd be no there'll be no processed food.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Have you seen him? Like all these drug fronted shots
and newsagents that sell prime and.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Well, you're gonna live off sugar, You're gonna you're gonna
live off fake American swite.
Speaker 1 (26:47):
What I'm saying is back in the in the wartime
that's good and existed with corner shops.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
And what's tonight mon gob stoppers.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
You can't do that. Juli Ranchers from those.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
They'd survive and you kill a blast though, right?
Speaker 1 (27:02):
Is that? I say that? Right?
Speaker 2 (27:04):
You know you've not asked me about my knee surgery.
I've had knee surgery. I'm not once focused to me
by how's it going?
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Book about last week? We didn't went Neil Bedford, didn't
we then didn't ask me about it? Come on, then
open up. It's fine. Actually like that knee, it's actually
weirdly healed. Unbelievable medical marvel, what do the dogs are?
Speaker 2 (27:23):
You were Marvel of science?
Speaker 1 (27:26):
It just took my word.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
No, I didn't say it differently because because weird, Like
I'm pretty sure they've cut a nerve or something.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, so you can't feel it, but the wounds.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Are pretty much healed.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Now.
Speaker 2 (27:37):
I got to get signed off for work tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Hopefully. That's really good. When I first saw you, obviously
you've been hobbling a lot, and I'm like, oh, he's
going to be on crutches, but you're like completely cut free.
I mean that were a few weeks after. I was
pushing it a little bit. Don't the say it's supposed
to be a month's recovery.
Speaker 2 (27:51):
Well, I'm not going to be able to play five aside.
Next week, I still got to do nine months of
physio and stuff like.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
That and just sort of taken your hamstring.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
I've run out. So it's the third time I've had
my cruciate ligament reconstruct me. I've got a donor. There's
a bit of somebody else in the dead guy, she said,
and it's ament, and it feels so solid.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I don't want to like a link for Christie like incarnation,
So hopefully could you see could you find out whose
it was?
Speaker 2 (28:25):
I don't they get processed and they've got some big
factory in Switzerland with America or something with the dead.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
Dead.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
It's interesting that you should be the one that repeats
the story.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
No, but I think it was prior, wasn't it.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
But it feels amazing. My surgeon was class and I'm
lucky that I get really good medical insurance. So I've
got it done privately. And the company that provided the
ligament sent me a really expensive machine that pumps ice
water around man knee. It's called no no, no, it's
like a strap you put around it. It's called like
(29:02):
a cryotherapy machine. He sent me for nothing.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Can I borrow that? No?
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Yeah, of course you can.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Will know from my ankle, right, you can.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
You've got to buy it's like modular, so you'd have
to buy the ankle strap. I've got the knee strap.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
All right, obviously it's modular.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Chance nobody is made in America.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Not much being in America.
Speaker 2 (29:26):
Anyway, we're tailing off, so I think that might be
the end of the episode an hour.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Let me just give my notes. We're not so over there.
Speaker 2 (29:35):
Well, we've done it. We've done a good time.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
Yeah, that's it. I'm done.
Speaker 2 (29:41):
Thanks, thanks for listening. Please, if you are a listener,
or even if you're not, leave us a five star
review on Spotify or.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Five star is it? No, no, no, you will take
a four if you think about one star review that.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
But yeah, your reviews are really important to pushing us
to new audiences and make sure you subscribed and all
that jazz. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
The message where did you read them out? We might
we get more people to messages in.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Yeah, but they're all like really like saying how great
we are, and that feels boastful. Anyway, we'll see you
next time.
Speaker 1 (30:14):
Read them out.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Hopefully we'll have a guest because we'll send some text
messages around.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I want to hear them.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
They're rant enough to make it into a section HM
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