I Opened Our Marriage & Demanded My Husband to Accept My AP. His Response Was BRUTAL.

I Opened Our Marriage & Demanded My Husband to Accept My AP. His Response Was BRUTAL.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
No, I don't think I will, I said. She gave
me a strange look. What do you mean you said
i'd be here when you got back, and you'd tell
me everything. I explained, I won't be here, so you
can't tell me. Where will you be? She asked, Somewhere else?

(00:21):
I replied, She pouted. What do you mean somewhere else?
None of your business? I said, you're acting childish, She said,
grow up. It's the twenty first century. Things have changed.
You've changed, I agreed, but I haven't. Except for a
bit of gray in my beard. You seem to have
changed a lot, and not in a good way. She
looked at herself, still as stunning as ever. What do

(00:43):
you mean You're meeting someone for dinner and you wouldn't
tell me his name. That sounds like change to me.
It's nothing, she said, I love you more than ever.
This doesn't affect my feelings for you. I can't say
the same. I told her an hour ago, I love
you more than ever, but now my feelings are more
of disgust than love. She looked, offended. That's disappointing. That's life,

(01:08):
I said, I get disappointed all the time. Yesterday, on
the golf course. I expected to shoot eighty five but
ended up with eighty seven. Why are you talking about golf.
It's a frustrating game, I said. You mentioned frustration, so
I shared my own anecdote. My attitude irritated her. Tell Barnes,
I'm leaving in twenty minutes. She said, take me seriously

(01:28):
and try to understand. I do. Take you seriously. I said,
that's the problem. I realized you're not a serious person.
Her pride was wounded. I have no idea why you
said that, She replied, Barnes, I'm leaving. You'll see nothing
will change between us. I'll make you insanely happy. You
don't realize it yet, but you will. You're wrong, I said,
what am I wrong about? She asked that nothing will change.

(01:51):
Everything has changed. My attitude towards you is changed. What
about Sylvia and Beck What will they think about their
parents getting divorced? What the hell, Barnes, We're not getting
a divorce. What we do is none of their business.
I agree, not the not getting divorced part, but the
none of their business part. Unfortunately, it's about what's happening
between you and some unnamed guy. You're complicating things she said, Barnes,

(02:16):
let's sit down and work these issues out. No, we won't,
I said, I'm leaving. This is more important than anything
you have planned. She insisted, I'm not sticking around. I
decided a minute ago, I said. She looked ready to
argue Collins. You're too late. The moment you thought I
would tolerate your behavior, you lost respect for me as
a man and a husband. It was too late. That's

(02:37):
not true, she shouted. I never lost respect for you.
I don't believe you. I said. Everything you've done since
you got home proves it's true. I'm leaving. You can
go on your date. I'm done. I grabbed my jacket,
wallet and keys, walked to the door and left. She
ran after me, but didn't make it in time. I
drove away as she opened the door and stepped outside.

(02:58):
I decided to visit Beck. She lived about four miles away,
so I messaged her white, Netflix and chill. She replied, immediately,
want company, I asked. She sent me a heart, I'll
make popcorn. When I arrived, she was already on the couch.
Her dog, Davy, greeted me enthusiastically, nearly knocking me over
with affection. Hey, buddy. I managed to stay on my

(03:19):
feet and gave him a good scratch as he wriggled around,
drooling on my pants and snoring with pleasure. It takes
about ten minutes to get to Beck's house. By the
time I got to the couch, Beck had already poured
me a glass of wine and put popcorn on my plate.
I sipped my wine and looked at her. Not a word.
She said, I like sweet wine. You don't. You're in

(03:41):
my house, deal with it. I laughed, Hey, I tried
to raise you right. It's not my fault. You lost
your way. She wiped the lint off my pants, threw
a plaid over my legs, and snuggled in. What's mommy doing,
she asked, I'm not sure, I said. She gave me
a puzzled look. That's yes. I agree. What's up, dad?

(04:03):
What do you mean you're not sure? When I got
home from work, she said she was going on a date.
I told her I disagreed. She said she would cancel
it and we would talk. I decided I was done
discussing it and left. So I don't know if she's
on a date or at home waiting to talk. She
stared at me shocked. What the hell, Daddy, what do
you mean by date? Beck? I'm as shocked as you are.

(04:25):
She told me she was going on a date with
a man, but didn't say who, and expected me to
just be okay with it. Dad. Is this a joke?
Are you sure you got it right? I wish it
was a joke. I don't know what's going on, I said,
I'll call her, she said, Collins answered, and the conversation
from Beck's side was interesting. Beck didn't mince words. Where
are you mom? With who? You just lied to me.

(04:46):
Dad's sitting right here. You lied? What the hell is
wrong with you? My mother just lied to me. Don't
call me, don't come here when and if I want
to talk to you, I'll do it. She ended the call.
We sat silently for a few minutes. I didn't know
what to say. I hugged her as she started to
shiver and then sobbed into my chest. She lied to me, Dad,
She told me she was with you at the restaurant.

(05:07):
She lied. I know, sweetheart, It's going to be okay.
Please don't cry, Beck, How is everything going to be okay?
She sat up, her sad tears turning to angry ones.
My own mother just lied to me. She's on a date. Daddy,
What are you going to do? I have no idea,
I said, Beck, I'm floundering here. I came to chat
with you to get my thoughts in order. I should

(05:28):
have thought you'd ask me. I'm sorry, it's not your fault.
She grabbed tissues, wiped her eyes, and blew her nose.
She looked at me, then lay on top of Davy,
who snored an objection. After a couple of minutes, she
moved back to me, snuggling against him. Davy always calms
me down, she said. Hugging you always calms me down.
I told her you smell better than Davy. She giggled,

(05:51):
he's a little stinky. Talk to me, daddy. Where did
this come from? What's going on between you and mom?
What are you going to do? I would love to answer,
but I don't know. I'm shocked. For a minute, she
sat in silence. We should call Sylvia, she said. She
pulled out her phone. Hey, syl where are you? I
need you to come here right now. No, this is

(06:12):
very important. I'll see you soon. She's at straps. Beck said,
it's a club. Nearby. She needs to take an uber.
We ate popcorn and drank wine, talking softly about what
might be going on with Collins. Sylvia showed up about
twenty minutes later. She greeted Davy and then joined us
on the couch. Sylvia, three years older than Beck, had
always been close to her sister. Beck was a tiny

(06:34):
blonde like her mother, while Sylvia was taller, with her
mother's hair and eyes a slightly larger and darker version
of her. She hugged us both. What happened? She asked?
What's the emergency? I was at a party. Everything better
be okay. Beck looked at her incredulously. That's not good.
Are you high? Sylvia laughed. I had two Margarita's and
a cocktail. Okay, Dad, go make some coffee. Beck ordered,

(06:58):
this is serious, sill. By the time I'd made coffee
and Sylvia had her second cup, Beck had told her everything.
Sylvia looked shaken. Daddy, There's more to this, isn't there?
Have you been fighting problems in the bedroom? We fight sometimes, yes,
but no more than when you lived at home. Mostly
we fight about you, two, I said. Beck punched me

(07:18):
in the bicep. Hey, I chuckled, no problems in the
bedroom that I know of. If there are, your mom
hasn't said anything. I need to talk to her. Sylvia said, Beck,
you too, You need to talk to her, Daddy. Why
didn't you stay and talk to her? Maybe I should have,
I admitted, I was too angry. She announced it so coolly.
Beck squeezed me. I know, dad, but we all need

(07:39):
to talk to her. When can you talk to her
without losing it? I don't know, I said. I hope
it's soon. I can't take it much longer. I'll go
to the lake, try to relax and get a grip.
I'll come with you. Beck said, let me get my
bag on a blanket for Davy. She paused. Give Daddy
a cigarette, she told Sylvia. Sylvia looked at me questioningly.
I nodded and she me a case. I wasn't a

(08:01):
regular smoker, but it helped with anxiety and I felt
I needed it. Beck came out with her bag, took
Davy's dishes, and we headed to the truck. Sylvia walked
us out. I'm going to talk to mom in the morning,
she said, Beck, let me know what happens. Daddy. Don't
do anything stupid. Okay, maybe, I said, I'll try not
to do anything super stupid. Sylvia hugged us. Davy climbed

(08:24):
into the car and we drove off. On the way,
Beck asked a million questions. Some I could answer, some
I couldn't. We got to the lake house, took Davy
to the lake and walked beside me, Beck holding my hand.
Some things hadn't changed. Davy swam, chased frogs and squirrels,
and we walked back. It was getting dark. I looked
at the booze supply won a mohedo. I asked Beck, yummy,

(08:48):
She said, I want some. I made two large portions.
Beck lit the fireplace and we sipped our drinks and talked.
We lit a cigarette and I felt relaxed. What do
you think, daddy, she asked. I have a few options,
but it all depends on your mom. I said, it's
pretty messed up. She might say she's lost her mind
and take everything back where in therapy. Beck said, I laughed,

(09:11):
maybe I'd try it. What if she's determined, she asked
in court, I guess, I said, But I can't see
why she would want that. I have no idea, Beck said,
you're smarter than me. Beck, you'll be a psychologist soon.
Why would she do this? I have no idea, she said.
People cheat for revenge, commitment issues, carnal attraction, or lack

(09:32):
of fulfillment. But I don't think any of those apply
to mom. If she has complaints, she should talk to
me and let me fix what's wrong. Yeah, you'd think so,
she said. We'll find out. I'll talk to her tomorrow. Dad,
you'll have to drive me back to get my car. Surprisingly,
I slept well. I watched videos until I fell asleep.
I got up, got dressed, took Davy outside, and he

(09:55):
wandered around for about an hour. When we got back,
Beck was already up. Do we have anything to eat, Daddy,
she asked, Not really, Honey, we had to stop on
the way here. It's all right, she said, you can
take me out to breakfast. I want French toast at
Gaily's deal. We left Davy at the house mostly asleep.
After a big breakfast, we talked about hypothetical situations, school,

(10:19):
my job, Davy's antics, and her internship. After getting her
stuff and Davy, I drove her back home. I walked
back to the lake, sat on the porch, and watched
the boats. It felt lonely. I missed Collins and the
times we sat together doing nothing. I missed Beck and
even Davy. I decided to go fishing. I took the
boat out and caught six nice crappies. I cleaned them

(10:41):
and found some frozen fries to eat with them. They
were delicious. When I turned my phone back on, I
had texts from both girls asking me to come over
to Beck's. I got there and they were eating pizza.
Beck brought me a beer and we sat at the
kitchen bar while they ate well. I talked to her.
Beck began me too, Sylvia said, and I prompted, You're

(11:02):
not gonna like it, Beck said. She told me she
wasn't happy, not with you, but with her life. She
thinks it lacks excitement and challenge. Some guy she works
with is hitting on her, and she likes the attention.
She wants to go on dates. She says, she loves you,
and you can date too. I sat digesting her words. Sylvia,
did she tell you the same thing pretty much? She said, Daddy,

(11:25):
I don't think it will last. She'll figure it out. Damn, Syll,
you don't mind this, Beck burst out I didn't say
I was fine with it. I think it won't last long,
She'll get over it and things will go back to normal.
I was dumbfounded. What should I do while she comes
to her senses? Love her, be patient, let her calm down.
Sylvia said, she loves you. She's just having mid life issues,

(11:47):
or maybe not. Beck said, these are mid life issues,
not fun with other guys. What other options do you have?
Divorce her, put her in a cage. Sylvia asked, I
have no idea. I said, diving her as an option.
No it isn't. Sylvia insisted, Jesus, Daddy, don't go crazy.
You two are meant to be together. Shouldn't you talk

(12:08):
to mom? Beck asked, tell her not to freak out.
This is some crap. Sylvia, you're taking her side and
dad hasn't done a thing. I'm not taking sides. Sylvia replied,
well that's a problem, Beck said, getting heated. You're supposed
to take sides, not this be patient crap. She went
on a date with some creep. You know he's an
idiot for hitting on a married woman, and she's wrong

(12:29):
for letting him. Let's take a break. I tried to
tone it down but they weren't interested. So what do
you want, Beck, our parents to get divorced. It's not
about what I want, It's about what Daddy wants. Daddy
didn't want this, Mom did, and she has to fix it.
She can have what she wants, but until she gets
her head straight, my relationship with her will depend on

(12:51):
what I want. And what will that be? Sylvia asked,
I want to see her as little as possible and
not hear her at all. So you're going to dictate
our relationship with mom. I'm not dictating anything. If you
can't see this as mom's fault, then you have the
same problem she does. WHOA. Let's not let this get
out of hand. I tried to hug them, Beck let me,

(13:12):
but Sylvia grabbed her bag and ran out the door.
Beck and I watched her get into the car, turn
the headlights on, then off, get out, and finally drive away.
I'm so mad at her right now, Beck said, furious.
I'm sorry, Dad, but that was crap. She pressed against me,
and I sighed, yes it is. But it's not Sylvia's fault. Beck,

(13:32):
it's your mother's kids shouldn't be in this position. We
had a special family, Our lives revolved around each other.
I'm closer to you girls than any father. I know
you always had a great relationship with your mother. You
and Sylvia shouldn't be in the middle of this. It's
not your fault, Dad, Beck said, it's mom's mess. But
Sylvia acting like it's no big deal is frustrating too.

(13:56):
Don't burn any bridges, I advised. Let me talk to her.
I love you. I don't want you hurt more than
you already are. She hugged me tightly. I trust you, Daddy.
I'll wait and see what happens. Keep me close, okay always,
I assured her. It was time to confront Collins. Her
car was in the garage when I pulled up. I
took a moment to find my calm, then went inside.

(14:18):
I felt a nod in my stomach and got a
glass of milk to calm it. Collins came out of
her office looking as bad as I felt. Hi, I said,
I'm glad you're back. I'm far from okay, I told her.
I know I wanted to keep myself safe. Do you
want to talk? I nodded, Here or in the living room.
Let's be comfortable, I said. She poured herself some juice,

(14:39):
and I grabbed some wheat cakes. We sat on the
couch a foot apart. Unusual for us, there was a
hostile vibe. I want to apologize, Barnes, She said, I
did everything wrong. If you think it's just about mismanagement,
we're wasting our time. I said, I don't understand. She said,
there's no way you could have mitigated telling me you
were going on a date. Do you get that. I

(15:00):
understand what you mean, but you don't understand me. She said.
I should have explained what I was doing to make
it tolerable. You'd need to be a wizard for that.
I said, do you have magical powers? She smiled. Not
quite magic, but almost. Go ahead, miss le Fay, I said,
think about it, Barnes. How old are we I'm forty
eight and I'm forty nine, She said, I feel each

(15:23):
of those years, not physically but emotionally. Remember when we
were twenty five, Yes, I remember everything. We felt alive,
like life was full of possibilities, Love was new every day.
Do you remember, yes? Think about our lives now. We
do the same things over and over. I love our routine,
but I want to add something new, bring back some excitement.

(15:45):
I get that, I said, But you think we can't
do new things together. I think we can, she said.
I told you i'd go on a date and share
the experience with you. You could do the same, Collins,
Your idea of together and mine are different. I said,
what do you mean when I say together? I mean
just you and me. Introducing someone else fails the together test.

(16:06):
She thought for a moment, How long since you've spent
time alone with another woman besides family? About six months?
Remember Kansas City with Amber? We met with telecom reps.
She nodded, I know Amber. Well tell me Barnes. Is
there any tension between you two, Not that I know of,
I said, She's gorgeous, but I'm married and ten years older.

(16:28):
We don't flirt. We have a good working relationship and friendship,
nothing more. Well, you said it yourself, she's gorgeous and single.
What if you took her out to dinner, hit the
night life, and dance together. Wouldn't that be exciting holding
all that beauty in your arms. Wouldn't that get your
motor running? Maybe that's why I don't, I said, why not?

(16:49):
She asked, Because I'm married to you. I told her,
I don't put myself in situations where I'm tempted by
anyone but you. And if I was okay with it,
she asked, it doesn't matter. I said, it wouldn't suit me.
She sighed, I'd be okay with it now I'm more mature.
I'd put up with it, and I think you should
put up with me doing the same. No, that's not

(17:10):
what I signed up for. You promised me, and I
promised you. If you want to leave, that's your choice.
If you're determined, I can't stop you. I only control myself.
I don't want to leave, she said. I want to
be more free and spontaneous, but stay married. You'll do
what you want regardless of how I feel. I can't
accept that you've been hiding this for me for a while.

(17:32):
What else have you been hiding? And then there's your
stunt on Friday night. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.
I was mad when you left. That's a lie. You
planned this long before Friday. You lied to Beck too.
You're good at that. I spat out my anger. You
had your chance to manage this. My position hasn't changed.
It's not about how you go about it. It's that

(17:52):
you did it, you plan to do more and want
to do it. I control myself, so I'll just get
my stuff and leave you to it. Barnes, that's he's
not what I want, she protested. I'm not doing it,
but you want to. I said, right now, I have
zero trust in you. You think I'm boring and neat excitement.
Even if you don't act on it, I'll always know

(18:12):
you think that we want different things. So let's move on.
I went to the basement, grabbed my luggage and started packing.
I took what I needed for a week, planning to
return later for more. She followed me, saying we could
work it out, but I didn't listen. I loaded everything
into the truck. She tried to get in, but the
door was locked. She stood in the driveway as I

(18:33):
drove away. It was depressing. I loved her and felt
like I lost half of my heart. I couldn't see
a way forward. I stopped at the grocery store to
distract myself, but the trip to the lake brought it
all back. I turned on a podcast but didn't register
a word. When I arrived, I took my stuff inside
in a daze. I considered talking to the girls, but

(18:54):
was too exhausted. An hour later, my phone rang. It
was Sylvia. Hi, honey, I said, where are you, daddy?
She asked, I'm at the lake. Where are you? I'm
at your house. Mom called and asked me to come over.
I got a call from Beck. Hold on, it's Beck.
I'll call you back. I answered Beck and told her
i'd call her back. Then I called Sylvia back. I'm

(19:15):
glad you're with your mom. She's in total distress. Dad.
You should be here with her, not me. I know, Sylvia,
this is difficult. Do you want to talk about it
over the phone. She was quiet for a minute. No,
I guess not. Are you coming back? No, I'm not.
I'll explain when I see you. It's not good, but
I guess it is what it is. She said, I

(19:36):
have to work. I can't stay here long. I'll stay tonight,
but I'm really busy at work. I don't know about tomorrow.
Your mom works too, That's not your concern. You do
what you need to do. Your mom and I are adults.
She snorted, clearly very upset. I'm so sorry, Sylvia. I
know this is hard for you. I love you. You're
my first child and You'll always be special to me.

(19:57):
She gasped. I love you too, Daddy. Bye. I composed
myself and called back, Hi, honey. Are you okay, daddy?
She asked, I will be Are you okay? Same here?
She said, I guess you're at the lake? Yes, want
to come outside. I'll tell you what happened. I'm packed,
she said. All my classes this week are online, but

(20:19):
I have to work on Wednesday and Thursday. Can I
stay the week? You don't have to ask. I'll spend
every second with you, I told her. I know I'll
be there in an hour. I've got dinner ready, I said.
While putting food out, I heard the sliding door open
and Davy's claws clicking. He was sniffing the food, so
I gave him some love and the fat. I trimmed
off the pork chops. As I washed my hands. Beck

(20:41):
hugged me from behind. I hugged her back. It smells good,
she said, No, Davy, she wiped his mouth and settled
him down. We started eating. I think it didn't go well,
she said. No. She had lots of explanations. It boiled
down to her being bored and wanting to feel young again. Fine,
she rolled her eyes. If you were seeing Mom as

(21:02):
a client, what would you say is wrong with her?
I wouldn't consider her a client, But if someone came
to me with her story, I'd say they're depressed, facing
a transition. There's no such thing as a midlife crisis.
I thought it was real. It's not a diagnosis. It's
a transitional period. Some people feel their mortality and start
doing stupid things to maintain the illusion they're immortal. Wow,

(21:24):
who would have thought my baby is so smart? She smiled, Yes,
I am. Don't forget it. Do you think she should
see a therapist? I'll tell her, but I won't get involved.
I understand. I'm sorry you're caught up in this. It's
not your fault, she said. I feel bad for you too.
We'll get through this. Yeah, we have no other choice.

(21:45):
Sylvia arrived Tuesday night. Beck made potato salad and I
grilled hamburgers. We ate on the porch. Dad. Mom's a mess,
Sylvia said, yeah, pretty much. What are you going to do?
She asked? She wants you to come home. She promised
to forget about all this. She sees that's the damage
she's done and is sorry. I'm sure she is in
a way. What do you mean in a way. It's

(22:06):
hard to explain. I need a minute. Girls want to drink.
What do you have? Sylvia asked, I've got stuff for
palomas yum. Beck said I want some. Sylvia did too,
So I mixed the drinks and gathered my thoughts. We
got comfortable and I was as ready as I could be. Sylvia,
are you still dating that guy dick Weed, Beck teased.

(22:28):
Sylvia laughed. No, I realized he's an idiot. I have
a new boyfriend named Richard. Oh my god, they laughed hysterically.
I tried again, Well, suppose Richard told you that you
were boring? How would you feel? Not good? I'm not boring, No,
you're not. But if he feels that way, can you
argue with his feelings? I see what you mean, she said, Beck,

(22:50):
you don't like raisins. Sylvia, you don't like coconut. That's
how you feel. Would you feel differently if I told
you you did? No? Beck said, did mom really say
you're bored? Not in those words. She said a lot
about how exciting life used to be, how we're stuck
in a rut, and she wants to bring that excitement back?
Can you feel it, dad? Beck asked, maybe a little?

(23:12):
I said, I know. I'm not twenty five anymore, but
I like what we do. Otherwise I'd be doing other things.
I don't see anything wrong with that. Sylvia said, what
did mom say? She wants to do different things, but
not with me. She likes being pursued by other men
and wants to date them. Oh my god, Beck said,
how do I handle this? Can I tell her she's wrong?

(23:35):
Feelings can't be argued away. Will excitement magically appear? No?
It won't. Beck said, Honey, do you really believe this
hit her suddenly on Friday? She's been thinking about this
for a long time and didn't say a word to me.
I know, Beck said me too. Sylvia added, Dad, if
she gets therapy and changes her mind, can you work
it out? I shook my head. She thought she could

(23:57):
just tell me she was going on a date and
I'd be fine with it. That's very disrespectful. Sylvia sank
into the chair. I know, Dad, what if she's truly sorry?
She said, she's sorry she didn't tell me better, not
for doing it. I'll talk to her, Sylvia said, Beck,
can you help if she agrees to see a therapist.
I will if she asks for help, Beck said, but

(24:19):
she has to want it herself. Sylvia left unhappy. Beck
and I stayed in touch with her, but Collins dismissed
therapy and only mentioned couples counseling. Beck thought it would
be futile unless Collins's dissatisfaction was addressed. Are you ready
for this? Beck asked, no, I'm not interested in other
women or sharing her with other men, I said. Sylvia asked,
what if you thought of it as a break and

(24:40):
got involved with other women, Then once mom sorts herself out,
you can get back to normal, may I? I asked?
What if in a few years she feels bored again. Besides,
I don't know any hot chicks even if I wanted to,
and none are waiting outside. They both laughed. You look
good for your age, Sylvia said, if you were looking,
you'd have no trouble. I'm not interested, I said, no, Sylvia,

(25:04):
I just can't. Are you disappointed in a way, yes,
she said, I hate it when you and mom aren't together,
but I respect you for knowing yourself and sticking to
your morals. Thank you. After two months with no change,
I filed for divorce. Collins called immediately. This has gone
too far. Barnes. Are you divorcing me? You have no
reason to What are you going to tell the judge?

(25:26):
I don't have to tell him anything. That's the definition
of a no fault divorce. What will you tell others?
We had a disagreement and you divorced me. I won't
tell them anything. It's none of their business. I'll be there.
We need to talk before it's too late. Do you
want me to make dinner Friday night? Yes, that would
be perfect. I was finishing dinner when I heard the

(25:47):
door open. It bothered me that she just walked in.
We both owned the lake house, but I didn't go
to our house in town when she was there. I
only got my stuff when she was at work. She
looked as good as ever, Still make my pulse race
despite my weariness. She tossed her purse on the chair
and walked over. She wanted to hug and kiss me.
I managed the hug, but the kiss was too much.

(26:09):
She looked hurt, but so was I for good reason.
What can I do for you? She asked? Everything's ready
if you want, you can set the table while I
get the dishes. We laid out the food, poured the wine,
and she started, I don't want a divorce, Barnes. Why not,
I asked, Because I love you and want to spend
our lives together. She said, But why you've been unhappy?

(26:30):
Remember I never said I wasn't happy. She said, you
expressed your displeasure clearly enough. You misunderstand me. I'm quite satisfied.
I just wanted to add to our satisfaction by dating
other men. That made me uncomfortable. The simple answer is divorce.
You can have fun with other men and I won't
be displeased. I don't understand I want to stay married

(26:53):
and have fun with other men. That's not what I want.
I don't want to be married to someone who wants
to date other men. We finished dinner and moved to
the couch. So that's it, she asked, Even though I
love you and chose you, you don't want to be married
to me. Yes, Collins, that's right. Look at me, Barnes,
she said. She climbed into my lap, kissing me passionately.

(27:15):
For a moment, I was lost in the sensations. But
then I stopped responding. She slowed and stopped what happened.
She asked, have you met anyone? I asked, I already
knew the answer. Yes, Barnes, are you going on a date? Probably?
I said. I like being married. I don't think it's boring.

(27:35):
Could I be one of those women you're dating? Maybe?
But I don't feel the same way about you. Maybe
I'll stop being angry, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
She got up, picked up her purse. Let me know
if you change your mind, she said, and left. The
divorce was in court and her attorney asked for counseling.
The judge explained he had to schedule it if one

(27:56):
party requested it. I'm not doing this, I told my
life lawyer. Figure it out. I can't. It's the law.
What if we withdraw the divorce petition? Will he still
order it? He was stunned. No, I don't think he could.
Is that what you want? Yes? Do it? I said.
This surprised everyone, and Collins looked smug. After the proceedings,

(28:17):
I told her I won't be forced to do anything
until you're done with this. Don't contact me. I'll never
speak to you again. If that's what you want. Her
jaw dropped and I walked away. She tried to talk
to me for two months, even through Sylvia Beck's relationship
with her mother deteriorated, causing tension between Beck and Sylvia.
Collins tried to come to the lake house, but I

(28:38):
changed the locks. She even came to my work and
I had to kick her out. After two months, she
gave up and told Sylvia she would no longer seek counseling.
If I wanted to sue. We did, went to the
same judge and the divorce was uncontested. She kept the
house in town and I got the lake house. The
property was equitably distributed. She kept her business and I

(28:58):
kept mine. No spouse support, and we both kept our pensions.
The usual divorce proceedings boring, tedious, and annoying. I started
buying businesses and quickly retired. I fished, learned to water ski,
and spent all summer on the boat with the girls.
By October, I applied for a visa to become a
resident of Mexico. As a tourist, I could stay for

(29:18):
one hundred eighty days, which gave me time to decide
my future. I winterrized the house, traded my Chevy for
a diesel powered f three hundred and fifty, bought a
luxury camper, hooked up the boat, and headed to Lake
Pacara in Sineloa, Mexico. The girls were a bit upset,
but I bought them plane tickets to Guadalajara, promising beach time.
They were thrilled. I bought a five acre piece of

(29:39):
land near the lake, got utilities, and became a local.
On my second fishing trip, I caught a fourteen pound
bass and was hooked. Sylvia visited in January and we
had a great time at a hotel in Perta Vallarta.
On the last day, she asked, you're not coming back,
are you, Daddy. I'm leaning towards staying. You girls are
the only reason i'd come, and I'll visit you often.

(30:01):
What about Mom, she asked, I guess she's mostly working.
She seems sad, not as energetic as before. I don't
think she found dating as wonderful as she thought. I'd
rather not talk about her, I said, okay. She gave
me a sad smile. We shrugged off the bad vibes
and had fun. I drove her to the airport and
she left with hugs and tears. Beck visited in February

(30:25):
and stayed with me in the camper. We spent three
days at the beach. Then she wanted to see where
I lived. We drove to my place and she loved it.
I can't believe you have such a beautiful place, she said.
It would be better if you lived here, I said.
She looked thoughtful. I have no idea how I'll make
a living. I'd like to use my degree. It's agribusiness,

(30:45):
I said, She laughed, farming. What does that have to
do with looms? I got into machine tools from working
at a farm implement dealership. It started with making harder
pins for combines. I had no idea, she said, Well,
there are ways to use your degree. Explain, she said,
you're a psychologist. You mainly listen to people's concerns. Bartenders

(31:07):
do that too, she laughed. She stayed for two weeks,
then flew back. I missed her, but soon returned to
my relaxed lifestyle. Six months later, she called, I need
a favor. If I can do it, I will. I
need a loan, A big loan or just short on cash.
A big loan, she said, I want to buy a cabin.

(31:27):
Is it an existing lodge? Does it generate income. Can
I see it online? I hoped you'd go see it.
It's ten miles away on Lake Pikara. Really, you've checked
the books. Yes, it makes good money. They have a
bar so I could listen to people's problems. I laughed,
How much do you need? She showed me a staggering figure. Wow,
back you went big. Go big or stay home? She said,

(31:49):
I'll prepare a payment plan, I said. She said it
should be pretty short term. Once I own the business
and show a profit, i'll get bank financing. Right now,
I'm like someone with no credit rating. I understand. I said,
that's so cool. Beck. It'll be great to have you here.
I'll take a look and let you know what I think,
but you need to see it for yourself. Three weeks
later she arrived and we checked out the place. It

(32:11):
catered to fishermen, mostly from the US, and seemed like
a great investment. Six months later, Beck owned the business
and ran it well. Davy became a local celebrity and
we spent a lot of time together. Beck sometimes worked
at the bar, and it was fun to watch her
use her psychology skills. The restaurant was first class and
always crowded, but there was always a seat for me

(32:31):
in the kitchen. One Friday night, the chef asked if
I minded if another guest sat with me. I agreed.
When he returned with the guest, my jaw dropped. She
was gorgeous, elegantly dressed in a yellow outfit that highlighted
her complexion. She had a mane of glossy black curls
with some gray, high cheekbones, and dark eyes. The chef
introduced us, Miss Valiente, This is mister Barton. He's the

(32:54):
father of the lady of the house. I stood as
she sat down and introduced myself, Barnes, Please please, no mister.
During dinner, she laughed a low, musical sound that captivated me.
You can call me Nita, she said. Her English was
accented but flawless, her voice low and smooth. She had
already ordered a glass of sangria. I struggled to find
something to say to this stunning woman. It's pretty crowded,

(33:17):
I said, Lucky they have this table. I didn't make
a reservation. She said, usually Tomas finds me a seat,
but tonight I didn't want to sit at the bar
to avoid someone I see well You're safe with me.
My mission is to keep obnoxious guests away from beautiful ladies,
she blushed. I'm pleased to have a gallant protector, she
laughed again, sending goosebumps down my skin. Do you dine

(33:41):
here often? Yes, like Thomas said, my daughter owns this place,
and even though I can cook, I prefer coming here. Ah,
sweet Beck, she said, I like her a lot. We're
becoming friends. That's good to hear. Do you live nearby?
I have a house on the Siniloa River and also
in Lasmochus. I'm pretty mobile, Nita. I have five acres
nearby with a couple of buildings, a truck and a camper.

(34:03):
I like that I can go anywhere. You recently moved
here from the US, like Beck. I've been here about
a year. Beck visited, fell in love with the place,
and bought this cabin. What brings you here fishing? At first?
I explained, I sold my business in the States and
wanted to travel. What kind of business did you have,
she asked? Then she hesitated, I apologize, it's none of

(34:25):
my business, I laughed. No need to apologize. I made
parts for companies like Caterpillar and John deere Ah the
industrial tycoon, she said, with a brilliant smile. Not likely.
But I've been retired for a long time, but you
are so young. I was lucky. If retiring at forty
nine is considered lucky. I'm not retired, she said. I

(34:48):
could be, but I feel like I have things to do,
like what I asked, If you don't mind me asking,
I'm a smuggler, she said softly. Seeing my reaction, she laughed,
I'm joking. I own a pharmaceut company that supplies prescription
medications to the Mexican Social Security Institute. Wow, that's impressive,
I said. That's why I live in Los Mochus too.

(35:09):
She said, Maybe I should retire and become a slacker
and dreamer like you. I laughed. You speak excellent English.
Thank you, dig Gustardia s aberk Wallis Mi nagoto aki,
she asked. We switched to Spanish. Yes, tell me about Nita.
She smiled. I have many acres along the river, some
horses and lots of gelbvia cattle. I don't know them personally,
I said, making her laugh. I'll have to introduce you

(35:32):
to some, she said, I laughed. You're very funny. Can
I ask if mister Valiante exists. No, he used to.
He died in a petrochemical plant explosion. I'm sorry, Nita.
It's okay. It's been eleven years. I remember the good times.
What about Barnes, she asked. Beck has a mother, yes,
and another daughter, Sylvia. She's three years older than Beck.

(35:55):
I showed her a picture of Sylvia. She's very pretty.
She doesn't live here. No, oh, she lives in the
States with her mother. My wife and I divorced two
years ago. Is that a sore subject? It was, but
less so now we wanted different things. She wanted an
open marriage and I didn't. I'm sorry to hear that.
That's life, say, Nita. Can I take you to dinner

(36:17):
next weekend? I'd love to, but I have to be
in Los Mochus until next Tuesday. How about the Friday
after sounds great? Can I get your number? Sure, she said,
entering her number in my phone. Maybe when you pick
me up, I'll introduce you to some cattle. She giggled.
I walked her to her car, a new silver BMW
Z four. She kissed me on the cheek and it
felt electric. You were a charming dinner companion Barnes. She said,

(36:41):
thank you for letting me join you. The pleasure was
all mine. I can't wait for our dinner. You have
my number. Call me in the late afternoon. I will,
I promised. I closed her door and watched her drive away.
She was exquisite and she was going out with me.
I felt high. When I went to say good night
to Beck, she was excited. Did you like her? Isn't

(37:01):
she amazing? Did you ask her out? You set me up?
I said yes, I did. She's perfect for you. Did
she agree? Yes? Next Friday, but I need transportation other
than the truck. You can use my car. Thanks Beck,
I'll need my own soon. The next day, I texted Nita.
Two evil women are conspiring against me. She sent smiley

(37:22):
faces with hearts. Resistance is feudal, Beck has confessed. I said,
I can't wait for our dinner date. She sent more emojis.
The days felt like an eternity. I hadn't felt this
way since high school. I wrote to Nita daily, and
she replied two or three times, sometimes skipping a day.
Twice we talked on the phone. Talking to her was

(37:43):
a new experience. She switched between Spanish and English, telling
me about her day. It felt like we'd been friends forever.
When she got back, she called, and the excitement grew.
I drove Beck's car instead of the truck for our
first date. Following the directions, I reached a gated path
with no house in sight, but found a call button.
Hola s Barnes, I said. Nita's voice, replied, laughing, Luis

(38:07):
to a companantej Legado. The gate opened and I drove
down a long driveway to a huge mansion on a
cliff with a stunning river view. A young girl opened
the door. She was gorgeous, about twelve or thirteen, and
introduced herself as Pia, Nita's daughter. Pleased to meet you, Pia,
I said in Spanish, you look a lot like your mother.
Do you speak English? Yes? I speak English, Spanish and French.

(38:32):
She said, blushing, I know English better than French. I'm
sure you're good at all of them. I want to
take your mom out to dinner. Is that okay with you?
She gave me a critical look. Yes, you are very
charming for an older man, I laughed, You're a flatterer,
and I'm not old. She giggled. You must love Beck
a lot same here, I said. Taking her hand, she

(38:54):
led me into a large open space. This is Zanetta,
she introduced, the older woman. She takes care of me
in the house when mom's not here. Would you like
a drink while we wait? What do you suggest, I asked,
I drink lemonade. We also have juices and adult beverages.
Lemonade sounds delicious, and just call me Barnes. Okay, just Barnes,

(39:15):
she said, eyes flashing with laughter. She poured lemonade, and
we carried the glasses to the living room, with its
sliding glass doors opening to a porch and a mahogany
deck overlooking the river and valley. I like it here,
Pia said, let's sit and talk. Your mom never mentioned you,
I said. Maybe she's embarrassed to have such an impressive daughter.

(39:36):
She doesn't tell any one about me for fear they'll
like me more than her, Pia joked. We laughed as
Zanetta brought more lemonade. Thank you, Zanetta, we said, together,
making Pia giggle again. You steal other people's thoughts, she said.
Everyone around me wears tinfoil hats. I joked, we might
have some. Should I warn my mom? No? I need

(39:57):
to know what she's thinking to make her happy. It's
a good plan, she said. This is my first date
in years. I said, I need any advantage I can get.
Will your mom be ready soon? She likes to make
an entrance. She'll be down soon, Thank you, Pia. I
heard Nita's voice low and husky, and turned to see
her descending the stairs. She was breath taking in a simple,

(40:19):
elegant white linen dress with a lace at the neck line,
sleeveless and tan platformed sandals. She wore a wide brimmed
white hat and posed to impress. See Pia brought me
out of my stupor. You're very pretty, mam. Don't you agree, Barnes,
I cleared my throat. Yes, Nita, you're gorgeous. She smiled.
I see you've met the pre call. Yes, and it

(40:39):
was a pleasure, Pia. I hope to see you often.
You are a charming lady. I finished my lemonade and
walked over to Nita. You never mentioned this little beauty.
I wanted her to be a surprise. I know you
love your daughters, and I wanted you to love mine.
She's my life, Barnes. Yes, I can see that We
went to a nearby restaurant with a lively atmosphere. The

(41:00):
food and music were great, and I danced with Nita,
who was an amazing dancer. Holding her during a slow
dance was unforgettable. The drive back to her place was
a blur of happiness. At her door, she kissed me
and it was electrifying. Before I left, she invited me
to bring Beck and spend a day with her and Pia.
The following Saturday, Sylvia called me Tuesday afternoon, Dad, when

(41:21):
can I hang out with you and Beck? How about
eight tonight? We're having dinner at Beck's. Great Could you
ask her and send me a snap? Sure? Is something wrong? No?
I just need to talk to you. I always need
to talk to you too. Love you, Sylvia, Love you, Daddy.
Beck was fine with it, and we were in her
living room when Sylvia called. After the usual conversation, she said, Dad, Beck,

(41:42):
I hate living here without you. I'm tired of dating idiots,
hate my job, and mom makes me miserable. I want
to move there. Really. Beck was excited. That would be amazing, Sylvia.
Can you get a job? I think I've already found one.
I'm buying the travel agency that books cabins on the lake,
including yours. Beck. Wow, you've really planned this, I said, Sylvia,

(42:06):
we'd love to have you here. Are you sure positive?
I wanted to talk to you first in case you
didn't want me. She sobbed, breaking my heart. Sylvia, I'm
sorry I made you doubt that. I love you and
I'll always want you in my life. Me too, syl
You're my big sister. Remember when you spanked Jamie Myers
for picking on me? She giggled, Yes, I did. It

(42:27):
was a creep. When do you think you'll move? It
might take a month or two, but I've already started.
It's exciting. I can't wait, Beck said. We talked for
another hour that night in the camper. I reflected on
how great my life was. Beck had moved in, I
met Nita, and now Sylvia was moving in. Two things
couldn't be better. On Friday, I asked Nita if I

(42:47):
should bring anything. Beck says, you make great pico. Bring that.
I bought fresh ingredients and made a big bowl. On Saturday,
we took the truck to Nita's. I wondered what Nita
and Pa would think of it. They clearly weren't poor
and I wasn't either, but I liked my choice of living. Simply.
Would they think I was a tramp? We'd find out.
Pia ran out as we arrived and hugged Beck, then

(43:07):
hugged me. We're going to the river. Mommy made everything
for the taco feast, yum. Beck said, come inside. Pia said,
Mama and Zanetta are packing. She took us inside to
the kitchen where they were packing coolers and baskets. We helped,
and soon everything was ready. Barnes brought his truck. It'll
be perfect for transporting us. Her phrasing made me laugh.

(43:30):
What a delightful girl. We loaded into the car, with
Beck and Pia in the back seat and Nita in
the front with me. As we drove, Nita pointed out
various buildings. It's good to have you with us, I said,
I would never have found my way out of here.
She laughed. There are several places you can go, she said.
There are barns for different functions. What kind of buildings,

(43:51):
Beck asked, horse barns, equipment barns, storage barns, livestock barns,
and paddocks. Nita replied. We arrived at the river, where
there was was a gazebo, a dock, three jet skis,
picnic tables, and a grill. I planned to heat everything
up on the grill. Nita said, but we can use
your stove, right of course, I said, all the comforts

(44:12):
of home in a small package. I'd love to see inside.
Pia said, sure, I'll give you the grand tour, I said.
We put the taco shells in the oven and showed
them around. Pia explored every corner, lying on the bed,
sitting on the chairs, and checking out the appliances. She
and Beck carried our stuff to the tables, giving me
a chance to kiss Nita. She responded with a passionate

(44:33):
kiss that left us both breathless. Hello, beautiful, I said,
I couldn't wait to do that. Me too, she whispered.
Beck and Pia returned and we made lunch. Everyone praised
my pico and we chatted for an hour before Pia
suggested jet skiing. The girls changed into swimsuits and I
put on my swim trunks. We quickly launched the jet skis.

(44:54):
Can I come with you, Barnes, Pia asked, I'd love that.
I said, you drive, then I'll take a turn, and
Mom can go with you. When Nita and Beck appeared
in their bikinis, I was momentarily stunned. Nita was especially breathtaking.
She caught my gaze and blushed. Ready, she asked, we
all got on the jet skis. Nita led the way,
and we traveled upstream for about five miles. She pointed

(45:17):
to a cliff with a rope swing attached to a tree.
We shut down the engines. Do you want to swing
on the rope, she asked. Pio was excited. Yes, it's
so much fun, she said, you'll swing high above the
river and drop into deep water. I decided to give
it a try. Nita held the jet ski as we
climbed to the top of the cliff. Who wants to
go first? I asked, Beck should go? Pia decided. Beck

(45:40):
grabbed the rope and swung across the river, falling into
the water and resurfacing with a big smile. Oh my god, Daddy,
that was amazing. You have to try. Pia went next,
flipping through the air and swimming back like an otter.
Nita followed gracefully. Then it was my turn. The height
was intimidating, but I forced myself to jump the swing

(46:02):
was exhilarating, and I plunged into the cool water. It
was fun. Nita and I watched as Beck and Pia
took three more turns. Pia then decided she wanted to drive.
We drove back, lifted the jet skis out of the water,
and sat in the sun with cool drinks. As evening approached,
we packed up and headed back to the house. We
thanked them for a wonderful day, and I stayed for dinner.

(46:23):
How are you feeling, daddy, Beck asked, pretty good? A
little tired. Sun and water can really wear you out.
That's not what I meant. I mean about Nita and Pia.
Pia is a little doll. It's impossible not to like her. Anita, well,
I've developed feelings I never knew I had. She makes
me happy just being around her. She's beautiful, warm, funny, smart,

(46:44):
a great mom and independent. She's everything a man could want.
I know she seems to like you too. She told
me she thinks you might be the one. There can
only be one, I said, she laughed. Just don't screw
it up. I put a lot of effort into this.
I'll do my best. Thanks Beck. Now you need to
focus on finding love too, I will. I've been busy

(47:05):
with work, but my eyes are open. I hugged Beck
and drove home. Nita and I started seeing each other
two or three times a week. Sometimes I took Pia
fishing or water skiing when Nita was away on business.
I fell in love with Pia as if she were
my own daughter. After four months, I was completely in
love with Nita. When we were together, I was the
happiest I had ever been. When apart, I constantly thought

(47:27):
about her and dreamed of her. We texted all the time,
and she sent me pictures on Snapchat. We kissed at
the end of every date, and I wanted her in
every way. I was careful as she was special to me.
Beck and Sylvia loved her too. The four of them, Nita, Pia,
Beck and Sylvia often spent time together with or without me.
One Monday, I called Nita and asked if she'd like

(47:48):
to go to Touloum for the weekend. She called back
immediately excited. Really, I've never been there, but I've heard
it's beautiful and has Mayan ruins. She was in Los Mochus,
and I suggested flying from there. What about Pia? She asked,
is it just for us or do you have a
plan for her. I was planning on taking her and
seeing if Beck and Sylvia could come too a family celebration.

(48:11):
She was silent for a moment. Barnes, I'm very touched
that you consider Pia and me family. I'll be glad
of that, and I hope Sylvia and Beck can come too.
They feel like my daughters. They love you and Pia
very much, I said, do you love me very much?
She asked. I paused, then said, Nita, I want to

(48:31):
tell you everything in person. Yes, I understand. Sorry for
asking over the phone. We'll talk in Tulum, I laughed.
I checked the flights. One leaves at three in the afternoon.
Will you be ready. I'll arrange it, she said, drive
carefully with my daughters. Sylvia and Beck could go, and
Pia was thrilled. We set off on the drive with

(48:52):
Pia as our DJA. We took turns picking songs, teasing
each other about our choices. We picked up Nita and
headed to the airport. The fl light was smooth and
Tullam was as beautiful as Sylvia had promised. Our hotel
was luxurious and on the beach. On Saturday, we enjoyed
the beach and the blue water. In the evening, we
went to an open air restaurant. Beck and Sylvia took

(49:14):
Pia to a beach party and informed us she'd stay
in their room that night. Nita and I were left alone.
We walked back to the hotel and I pulled her
tightly against me. Well, that wasn't suspicious at all. I
think we were set up, Nita, she laughed. I think
you're right. Do you mind, Barnes, not at all, I said,
I love it. As long as you do, I'm happy,

(49:37):
she said. I took her to my room, made drinks,
and we sat on the couch with her snuggled up
against me. Nita, you asked if I love you, I
want you to know I love you more than I
ever imagined. Since the moment we met, I think of
nothing but you. You fill my heart, mind and life.
I love you so much. She looked into my eyes,
her deep, almost black eyes, full of emotion. That makes

(50:00):
me very happy, she said, I love you, Barnes. After
Emiliano died, I didn't think I could love again. But
now I have you, and you own my heart. My
heart belongs to you. I want to give you all
of me. Oh my god, Nita, I wanted this since
I first saw you. I said, You're the most gorgeous
woman I've ever met. I'm not afraid, she said. The

(50:22):
only thing scary would be if you didn't love or
want me. I'd have to be crazy not to love
and want you. Don't ever doubt it. You're the most
desirable woman I've ever seen, she chuckled. I don't need
thousands of men, just one. After that, we made love
and went to bed. I woke to the sun streaming
through the curtain and Nita sleeping in my arms. She

(50:43):
looked so beautiful, calm and peaceful. As we dozed, there
was a knock on the door. Come back with a warrant,
I shouted, It was Beck. I put on my robe
and Nita pulled the blanket over herself. Beck Sylvia, and
Pia rushed in with a cart full of breakfast. Becha
and Sylvia jumped on the bed with Nita, laughing and talking.

(51:03):
Pia sat on my lap, her midnight hair swirling around us.
You love her, don't you, Pa asked. I love you,
and I love her too, I said, hugging her tightly.
I want to be your daughter like Beck and Sylvia,
she said. Tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks. I'm
honored you feel this way, I said. I'll try my

(51:24):
best to be everything you need. Are you marrying mom,
she asked, so we can be a real family. There's
nothing I want more, I said, but I need to
talk to your mom first, just the two of us,
and I'm not ready right now. I leaned in and whispered,
I don't have a ring. Ah, I understand. We had
breakfast and then hurried to catch the shuttle to the

(51:45):
Mayan Ruins. The sight was awe inspiring, made even more
special by having Nita and Pia with me. We flew
back Monday morning, tired but happy. We dropped Nita off
and I took the girl's ring. Shopping, we found a
jeweler from the Nahawatal tribe with a large collection of stones.
We chose a red orange fire opal surrounded by four
small diamonds. The jeweler said he could make it in

(52:07):
two weeks and send it to me. I told Nita
I wanted to go back to the gazebo by the river.
She seemed to know what it was about, but just
told me to come. Pia was excited and had to
retreat to her room to avoid giving it away. In
the gazebo, I knelt down and Nita's hand went to
her mouth. Nita, I'm not good at speeches, but I
love you with all my heart. I don't want to

(52:29):
live without you and Pia in my life. Will you
marry me. I'll do everything to make sure you never
regret it. I opened the box and she held out
her hand. I put the ring on and she said, yes, Barnes,
I want to be your wife. I want to love
you always. She admired the ring. I can't believe you
got a fire opal my favorite stone, A little birdie

(52:49):
told me. I said, I think I know that bird,
she said, tears of happiness in her eyes. When we
got back to the house, Pia was already waiting and
ran between us in excitement. I can't believe it. You're
going to be my father, Barnes. She burst into tears.
I knelt down and hugged her. I thought this would
make you happy, baby girl, she pressed against me. Yeah,

(53:10):
I just I was hoping. I thought we'd never find anyone.
You found me, I told her, I'll never let you go, Pia.
She clung to me and sobbed for a few minutes.
It's such a fire, she said, I laughed. You've been
hanging out with Beck too much. You're starting to sound
like her. She chuckled. She's teaching me lots of good words.

(53:30):
We set the wedding date for December fifth. When Nita
walked down the aisle in gold, I was the happiest
person in the world. She said. She had worn white
before and wanted to break tradition. I moved in with her,
but we kept the camper for vacations. I removed it
from the truck, which we used for its intended purpose.
I had never been happier. The only hiccup came in

(53:51):
our second year, when Sylvia said she needed to talk.
We were sitting on the deck when she said Mom
wants to visit. I sighed, I guess it was bound
to happen. When is she coming for Christmas? She said, Sylvia,
what do you want, dear? I asked, She hesitated. I
wanted to spend Christmas here with you and Beck. Now

(54:12):
I have to spend part of it with Mom. Beck
doesn't want to, so I'll stay with her. I still
love mom. Dad. I'm sorry if this disappoints you, but
I remember all the good things. I hugged her. I'm
not disappointed. I'm proud of you. It's going to be okay.
You can still spend time here. Tell your mom you
already have plans for Christmas dinner. She'll have to deal

(54:33):
with it. It's her fault, not yours. It's hard, she said.
I just wanted you to know what if she wants
to talk to you, to see you, let me talk
to Nita. I said, she's smarter than me. Let's see
what she says. Sylvia spent the rest of the day
with me and Pia, and we had dinner together before
she left. When Nita returned from Las Mochis, I told

(54:54):
her about Sylvia's visit. We sat on the sofa watching
the fire, and she sipped her wine thoughtfully. What do
you think of meeting her, Barnes, she asked. I suppose
it was inevitable. She's the girl's mother. I don't have
any special feelings for her. I loved her for years,
but she ruined it. All the good times are overshadowed
by the way it ended. She snuggled closer and rested

(55:16):
her cheek against my arm. I think we should all
have dinner together at the cabin. I want to get
to know her, Barnes, really, I asked, Yes, she's been
a part of your life and the girls lives. I
can meet her myself. It made me nervous, but Nita
was independent and did what she thought was best. When
Collins arrived, she stayed in Beck's cabin. I saw the

(55:37):
girls less often, assuming they were spending time with her.
Nita did meet her, and if there were any issues,
she didn't mention them. I asked Nita what she thought
I like her. Nita said really, yes, she's changed a lot.
Sylvia and Becka gree She's become introspective and friendly with us.
That's good, isn't it, I asked, I think so we

(55:57):
talked about you. God, I hope you weren't listening, I said.
She laughed. She only said good things about you. I snorted,
I'll just argue. She smiled. She didn't admire your stubbornness,
of course, right, I said, But you're still here with me. Absolutely,
I adore you, Barnes. That's never going to change. Pia

(56:18):
came in and snuggled with us. And I hugged my
two girls. Two days before Christmas, it rained heavily, causing
the river to rise. We had to save the dock,
carrying it up three times overnight. The water also knocked
down two sections of our fence, and I fixed it
early Christmas morning with the help of a laborer. We
planned to eat at two o'clock, and I expected Sylvia
and Beck to arrive by then. After finishing the fence,

(56:40):
I showered and changed. When I was ready, I looked
for the girls but couldn't find them, although Sylvia's car
was there. I made spiced rum punch in cider, then
heard voices at the entrance. Pia ran in and sat
next to me. Davy lay across our legs, sighing contentedly.
That smells good, Pia said, it's rum punch, I said.

(57:01):
She took a sip and wrinkled her nose. You it
smells better than it tastes, I laughed, it's an acquired taste.
Try the spice cider instead. She took a cup, and
Beck walked in. She liked the rum punch. Sylvia followed,
and then my jaw dropped as Nita walked in holding
Collins's hand. They saw my reaction and Nita hurried over,
don't be angry, Barnes. Collins didn't have anywhere to go,

(57:24):
so I invited her. I wasn't angry, but not thrilled either.
Nita pulled me to Collins. Collins wants to talk to you,
she said. I offered Collins a cider or punch. She
chose cider, and we walked to the office. I sat
in my chair and she took Nita's You look good, Barnes,
she said, thanks you too, I replied, she looked great,

(57:44):
even a bit thinner. I need to apologize, Barnes, she said.
I was selfish and disrespected you. I know I caused pain,
and I don't deserve forgiveness, but I hope you can
forgive me. I've thought it through. I said. There were consequence,
but one of them was releasing me to find what
I have now. I was bitter and resentful, but now

(58:06):
i'm not. I'm sorry I caused you pain. I took
a deep breath. I forgive you, I said. You know
Nita and Pia they're dear to me, and Sylvia and
Beck love them. You'll always be their mother. You're welcome here, anytime.
Nita and the girls say you've changed. I hope you
live a happy life. I'm going to and if you

(58:26):
can accept that, I'll think well of you. Can we
be friends, she asked, We'll see, I said, but no nonsense,
she laughed. No I won't. You've landed on your feet, Barnes,
I'm still finding mine. Nita knocked. We're ready to eat,
she said. We sat at the big table, Pia said, grace,
and the air filled with laughter and happy voices. I

(58:47):
looked at Nita, who smiled and winked. Pia sneaked bits
of food to Davy, and my daughter's chatted non stop.
Collins seemed to be enjoying herself. It was going to
be a good Christmas. Inst