52: I Am Who I Am (ft. Jae Callis)

You know that quiet nudge that says text her now, take the other turn, or say yes even though it makes no sense? We follow that thread with our cousin Jae into a candid, funny, and deeply human conversation about intuition, grief, boundaries, and the tiny choices that shape a life. What starts as a rose–bud–thorn check-in becomes a roadmap for trusting your gut through career setbacks, family illness, and the everyday improvisation of motherhood and friendship.

Jae shares the origin of her intuitive practice—premonitory dreams, strangely specific “downloads,” and the moment a sudden urge to check on loved ones foreshadowed a profound loss. We talk about learning to listen sooner and question less, letting presence be the gateway to clearer signals. From navigating a doctor’s office by feel to stopping a car at night and meeting a lifelong friend, we explore how openness (with discernment) can widen your world. We also confront the hard edges: the job you don’t get after multiple interviews, reframed as “rejection is protection,” and the ongoing work of supporting family without slipping into overcontrol.

The conversation takes an honest turn into empathy and media diet. One of us is pulled toward deep dives—9/11 archives, true crime—while another draws a bright line to protect her nervous system and peace. We borrow a reframe from supervision: vivid imagination fuels empathy but can also create secondary trauma. The fix isn’t cynicism; it’s skill—curate your inputs, notice your body’s response, and keep compassion without carrying everything.

Somewhere between astrology shorthand, wedding toasts, and kid chaos, the through line holds: intuition isn’t a rare gift; it’s a muscle. Practice in small ways. Text the person who surfaces in your mind. Journal the moments when your gut was right. Meditate, pray, or sit quietly until the noise drops. And when the world asks for you—at work, at home, with friends—answer from the part that already knows.

If this resonates, tap follow, share it with a friend who trusts their gut, and leave a review so more curious listeners can find us. Your stories make this community smarter—what’s the last time you listened to your intuition?

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Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_03 (00:04):
Welcome to Turn the Page Podcast, sisters, best
friends, and brunch enthusiastswith relatable episodes that
feel like you're chatting withtwo of your closest friends or
sisters.
Join us as we turn the page ondifferent topics about yourself,
motherhood, adulthood, andanyhood.

SPEAKER_02 (00:22):
And finding yourself again through meaningful
friendships, endless piles ofunread library books, and
endless Amazon packagedeliveries.
Real, honest, and a little bit.
Talk about it all.

SPEAKER_03 (00:34):
So grab your favorite drink, put the kids to
bed, lace up your skirt orwhatever you need to do, and
join us.
We can't wait to connect withyou.
Hi guys, welcome to Turn thePage Podcast.
This is Tawana Page, yourco-host.
This is your other co-host,Shere Page Barber, and we have a
special guest.

SPEAKER_01 (00:54):
Hi, I'm Jay.
I'm their cousin.

SPEAKER_02 (00:57):
Yay! Jay's here visiting us from Georgia.
If you don't want to disclosewhere you're from.

SPEAKER_01 (01:05):
No, that's fine.
Okay.
Atlanta, Georgia.

SPEAKER_03 (01:07):
You don't have your address on the sites like other
people do.

SPEAKER_01 (01:09):
Born and raised.
I love it.
But no, I'm here visiting my twowonderful first cousins.

SPEAKER_03 (01:16):
This festival first.

SPEAKER_01 (01:18):
Of course.
That means we're closer.
Closer in relation.
Um, but yeah, we're hanging outand I'm enjoying spending time
with them.
And hello everyone.
Okay, so usually it's gonna pickup on that.

SPEAKER_03 (01:32):
Okay, sure.
So usually on our guest podcastwe do a this or that, but we
don't have that prepared todaybecause we were full disclosure
at a winery um celebratingJacquaret being here.
But we're gonna jump in.
We can do a rosebud thorn.

SPEAKER_02 (01:49):
So rose is something good, bud is something you're
grateful for, thorn is somethingnegative or like not great.

SPEAKER_03 (01:57):
Okay.
Or the bud could be likesomething you're working on, but
you're grateful for like theprocess that you're working on
at.

SPEAKER_01 (02:03):
Okay.
You can go first.
So, Rao, something good.
Um, I have pivoted my way ofdoing things at work and
prioritizing tasks.
Okay.
Um being more productive andefficient.
I like that.
Nice.

(02:23):
Um, and you said, but uhsomething you're gonna be.
Something grateful for.

SPEAKER_03 (02:27):
Even if it's like hard, but like you're so
grateful for like going throughit, or maybe something you went
through that was really hard inthe process, but like on the
other end, you're like, oh, Iwas so grateful for it.

SPEAKER_01 (02:36):
I am grateful for always having a positive
mindset.
Um since December 24th, likeChristmas Eve of last year, I
had five family members in andout of the hospital.
Okay.
Some of them with some veryserious conditions.
And um, one of my familymembers, actually, my favorite

(03:00):
uncle, passed away in February.
We had the same birthday.
Oh wow.
And um, to some people, thatprobably would have been a lot
to deal with.
Um, but I'm grateful that I wasable to understand that, you
know, it's a process of life,you know.
Um, but value their input andwhat they did for me in my life,

(03:24):
that one that passed away.
Um, and just being there for myfamily members that are still
here, but dealing with their ownum, you know, medical conditions
and making sure that I'msupporting them and not being
too overbearing because I cankind of be like someone that
kind of like really jumps inbecause I'm a problem solver by
nature, yeah.

(03:45):
And knowing when to like drawthe line back to where, okay,
they have to want to be betterfor themselves.
Yeah.
Instead of me trying to take therein.
So that was a process I had tolearn.
Um, and what was the other one?
Thor.
Thor.

SPEAKER_02 (04:01):
Something negative, something negative, or like
something you didn't love.

SPEAKER_01 (04:05):
Yeah.
But it still happened, yeah.
So there was this position thatI actually applied for at work
that I really wanted.
Um, I had multiple rounds ofinterviews, and unfortunately, I
was not offered the position.
Okay.
Um, it was kind of I don't wantto say like gut-wrenching, but I

(04:30):
was confused because I feltlike, okay, I got through this
far.
It was looking good, butultimately what I kind of gather
is that they possibly justalready have someone in mind
that they wanted for theposition.
Um, and just knowing how to takethe personal side out of it and

(04:52):
understand that it's not myseason.
You know, everyone has their ownseason to win, lose, or
whatever.
And it was that person's season.
And this isn't mine.
It's not bad, it's not good.
It's just that's life.
And just moving forward andunderstanding that, you know,
maybe that rejection wasprotection.
Mm-hmm.
And um, just not being, youknow, so negative and moving

(05:17):
forward with my careerdevelopment and you know,
continuing to do the work sothat I'll be prepared for the
next opportunity that comes.

SPEAKER_03 (05:26):
Fair, yeah.
I love that.
Love it.
Thank you.
Do you want to go next?
Sure.

SPEAKER_02 (05:33):
I don't like going when I don't have it.
Okay, I can go haired.

SPEAKER_03 (05:37):
I can go.
Okay.
So my rose is that we get tospend time together.
We, as in the three of us, aftersince a year ago, because when
you got married.

SPEAKER_02 (05:46):
Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (05:47):
Uh oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (05:49):
Well, the wedding was fantastic, by the way.
I had a great time celebratingwith my family.
It was nice.

SPEAKER_03 (05:58):
The bud, I would say, is offline before this
recording.
We had like a deep conversation,like come to Jesus moment, like
for myself, but it was like allout of love from both both of
them.
My sister and my cousin.
Just like the constant likegrowing process and the growing
pains of growing and how painfulbut also like beneficial it is,

(06:21):
and that.
Um, the thorn I would say isthat I have fallen off with like
being active and like workingout, and that's not to say like
that you should be working out,but like for me personally,
that's just been like a thornfor me.
It's just been trying to likefind the right time to do it.
So I'm still trying to workthrough that.

(06:42):
Again, I feel like it's always acycle, but maybe that's just
what it is.
So, sure, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (06:48):
That's fair, yeah.
Um, I guess my roses also thistime.
I think, especially as adultsand moms, it's hard to find
one-on-one quality time toconnect and actually get to talk
and pick each other's brains andcatch up.
So that always feels fulfilling,even though who knows when it'll

(07:11):
happen again.
Um, my bud, even though it waslong and I really don't have a
great attention span.
I had a good training the pastcouple days that um I feel
excited about, like to use andto implement, and so yeah, that

(07:33):
I guess I'm grateful for alwayslearning and growing in my
career.
Um, because I had to get prettybored.

SPEAKER_03 (07:41):
Love that.

SPEAKER_02 (07:42):
Um, my thorn I don't know.
Um grief just an ongoingprocess.

(08:02):
Um that's day today, and I thinkdifferent in different contexts
in different regards.
So just kind of meeting myselfwhere I am and whatever that
looks and feels like for theday.
For the day, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (08:19):
That's the best you can do.
Yeah, being present in themoment.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (08:25):
I love that, yeah.
So, guys, just full disclosure,we had an actual like topic for
today planned, but it's justgonna be a mixed bag of things
today, just because this is whowe are as adults, just being
super honest about things.
Um, but Jay, I wanted to for youto share with the listeners

(08:46):
about intuition.
Um, I admire that about you.
So if you could just share likeas much as you're comfortable
with, like your journey withthat and like where you are with
that now, and if anybody isinterested in like learning
about diving into theirintuition, and like it'll be
helpful for me too, because I'mtrying to okay, you know.

SPEAKER_01 (09:06):
Yes, okay, so um I first kind of learned that I was
I guess somewhat different, waswhen my maternal grandmother um
was about to pass away.
Okay, so your mom's mom.
My mom's mom.

SPEAKER_03 (09:25):
Yeah, and oh full disclosure, sorry, timeout.
I love saying those phrases.
Um, Jacre is our first cousinthrough her dad and our um mom,
so brother and sister.
So it's her mom's side.
Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 (09:36):
Yes.
So um my grandmother, um, wewere very close.
I'm the only child, andbasically she was staying at me
and my mom's home for a few daysum because she wasn't feeling
well, and she told us that shewas ready to go home.

(09:57):
And so we were like, okay, we'lltake you home.
And I woke up one morning justfeeling like something was
wrong.
I didn't really know what it wasor what was going on, but I
immediately like called my dad,he was fine.
I called my grandma, she wasfine.

SPEAKER_03 (10:19):
Did you get a sense that something was wrong with
people that you in your familythat you loved, or just like you
were just like going throughlike the checklist?

SPEAKER_01 (10:26):
Something felt off and I felt an intense feeling
like I needed to do something.
Okay.
I didn't know what it was.
You just felt okay.
Felt like something was wrong.
And so I was like, hmm, maybe Ineed to call and check on my
close people.
So like I said, my dad was good,my grandmother was good.

SPEAKER_03 (10:46):
Our grandmom shared together or grandmom?

SPEAKER_01 (10:48):
I my grandmother, my maternal grandmother.
Okay, okay.
I did call uh our sharedgrandmother.
Yes, I called her to check inher and see if she was okay, she
was fine, and our grandparent,our granddad was still living at
the time.
So yeah, I called everybody thatI could think of to make sure
everything was okay, andeverybody was fine.
And so I said, okay, well, Idon't know what that was about.

(11:11):
So I just kind of left it alone.
Uh, like a couple days, well,maybe like a week or so later,
um, my dad was picking me upfrom um the bus stop.
Okay, and I was uh we would heusually drops my friend off, you
know, before he takes me home.
But anyway, he basicallydisclosed to me that my

(11:33):
grandmother had passed away thatday.
That day he picked me up, and Iwas like, what?
Because my grandmother was likemy favorite person, um, and I
was the only child, and um, eventhough she had other grandkids,
I knew I was her favorite, likenobody could tell me, and so I

(11:55):
processed that death verydifferently than everybody else.
Um, I felt like I didn't grievehow everybody else grieved.
Like, of course it hurt, but Iwasn't distraught about it.
Like I thought I would be.
And when I went to the wake,because we had the wake.
No, wait, pause.

(12:16):
Before my grandmother passed, myaunt Lily, who was my
grandmother's aunt, so she wasmy great aunt.
Okay, she passed.
Okay.
Like probably a month or sobefore my grandmother passed.
Okay.
And so when I went to her waketo view the body, I saw my
grandmother's face.

(12:38):
Oh.
And my aunt Lily's face.
Oh.
Now my aunt Lily and mygrandmother favored each other,
but my grandmother wasdark-skinned.
Okay.
And my aunt Lily was like aboutyour complexion.
But you saw herself.
I saw my actual grandmother'sface on her body.
Okay.
When I walked up to her.
Did you tell anybody that?
I told my mom.
Oh.

(12:58):
And she was like, what?
And she didn't understand it.
And of course, she kind of likedisregarded it and just kind of
never really took it serious.
So I didn't have anybody to talkto about it.
Yeah.
It was very strange for me.
And then it also made mequestion if it actually
happened.
Or am I making this up?
Yeah.
So fast forward, my grandmotherpassed.

(13:19):
And I'm like, okay, so I saw myAunt Lily pass, and I thought my
grandmother's face was in herface.
It was kind of likeforeshadowing.
Okay.
Letting me know.
So in hindsight, as an adult nowthat I know everything, my
intuition was trying to prepareme for her death.
Yeah.
Because of our relationship.

(13:39):
Yeah.
Like, even though I wasn'tprepared to see what I saw and
understand what was happening,it happened, and I felt like it
was a way for me to not take herdeath so intensely.
Yeah.
Um, because to this day, when Ithink about her, I don't really
cry.

(14:00):
Okay.
And for years, like she died myum freshman year of uh high
school.
Her birthday was May 10th.
She died literally on herbirthday.
And my mom found her at home.
Okay.
And so that was very hard for mymom to deal with finding her

(14:20):
mom.
Um, but like I said, everybodyelse was like distraught because
she was like the glue for ourfamily.
And I just felt bad and beatmyself up about it.
Like, why do I not feel bad?
Yeah.
So that was when I first knewthat my intuition was real.
Okay.
So fast forward some years, thatwas like I said, I was a

(14:42):
freshman in high school.
Um, I would say possibly I'vehad glimpses of it in my life
where it just I knew things, butI didn't know how I knew them.
Okay.
And I would get signs.
Is that for like things thatwould have like a premonition?
Yes.
Okay.
So me and my child's father weregoing through some things.

(15:06):
Yeah.
And basically the answer Ineeded was delivered to me in a
dream.

SPEAKER_03 (15:13):
Okay.
Okay.

SPEAKER_01 (15:14):
And so when I woke up from that dream, that
information that was provided inthe dream gave me exactly what I
needed to know.
And translated into likereality.
Right.
Okay.
And I also would verbalizethings to him that I had dreams
about for him.
And so he diminished it, like,oh, you're just being negative,
or this, that, and the other.

(15:35):
And I'm like, no, this is thisis gonna happen.
It may not happen immediately,but it's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_03 (15:42):
Because at that point you had already had
experience with things happeningthat you had already dreamed
about.
So you knew it wasn't just likeyou were just saying it.
Like you had practice, notpractice, but like you had had
experience with it.

SPEAKER_01 (15:53):
Right.
Okay.
And so, excuse me, when thesethings were happening, it was
like, of course, he neverconfirmed, like, oh, you were
right.
Yeah.
But I was, yeah.
I was right.
Yeah.
And I get messages delivered,like I said, in my dreams.
I have like visions, or likeeven something simple as, you

(16:16):
know, I'm going to the doctor'soffice, right?
I've only been to this doctor'soffice one time.
And I don't remember what flooror what, you know, door that I'm
supposed to go to.
And my intuition guides me.
Okay.
And I just pay attention and Ijust go with it.
Okay.
And that's why I said presence.
Like the way it helps me tobuild it and to like expand and

(16:40):
get better at it is beingpresent and not questioning it.
Because whenever you get thosefeelings, those inklings, you
have to allow it to come throughin order for you to receive it.
If you're blocking it and askingall these questions, or that
doesn't make sense, or whatever,you're not connected.

(17:01):
Yeah.
And so that's pretty much how Ihave gotten a little bit better
at it.
I wish I was light speed where Icould like really use it for
different situations.
But but it starts with somethingas small as, like I said, the
doctor's office.
Yeah.
And I'm sat I try not to saythis a lot, but naturally I'm

(17:24):
someone that overthinks things.
And so that has also kind ofhelped me to trust the process
and trust what I feel.
Okay.
Because I'm not trying tooveranalyze it or find the
rationale behind it.
I'm like, this is what it isbecause this is how I feel, and
this is what I need to stay awayfrom.

SPEAKER_02 (17:46):
So intuition and your ex for you, it means it's
like something beyond what youcan explain.
It's like a something that youget messages, you get
information.
Right.
Which is because when I think ofit, I don't have those
experiences, but I have like atrust my gut kind of like when I

(18:09):
think of intuition for me.
That's that's your intuition.
Yeah, so because you weretalking about with your
grandmother and just having thisinformation of like what was to
come, it makes me think about ummy friend that passed last year
because something told me toreach out to her.
I reached out to her on aMonday, and she was able, that

(18:30):
was her last text to me.
She was able to tell me what wasgoing on.
Like she was in hospice, she wasdeclining.
But you had been talking to herbefore that, right?
But I would reach out weeklybecause she had been sick for a
few years, but I would reach outand check in.
But something was like, let mejust check in today because I
just had a feeling.
Yeah.
And she her last text to me waslike, I'm in hospice, like

(18:51):
things aren't great.
But that opened the door for herfamily to keep me in the loop
with what was going on.
Um, because she declined quicklyfrom there, and I was able to go
see her um a few hours beforeshe passed, and that was another
thing too.
That was like, do I wait untilmy husband gets home to stick

(19:11):
with Sage, or do I like just gotell someone it's urgent, like I
need childcare right now?
Yeah, because then it could betoo late.
Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (19:18):
And I was able to do the irrationale part that you're
trying to figure it out.

SPEAKER_02 (19:23):
Not questioning it, like I just something told me I
needed to do it, and that I knewit would be hard, and it was
awful.
I mean, it was terrible, but Iwas able to do it, and then a
few hours later I got themessage that she was gone.
So, like, I had those lastmoments with her, right?
But I think about that a lotwith just yeah, so I guess it's
personal.

(19:43):
Like, intention to me istrusting your gut and listening
to what your anxiety for me istelling you for you.
Like, you get messages, you getinformation.

SPEAKER_03 (19:54):
I feel like mine is like not reverse, but like both
of our grandparents on like ourdad's side, mine and Cherie,
have passed away, but likethey've been gone for quite a
bit, but like since the trip hadjust wanna cut this part out.
I didn't want to cut out whatyou were saying with the beeps

(20:16):
and everything.
Okay, so since they've passedaway, I've had like I've like
always had dreams about themsince they passed away.
And like the night that ourgrandpa passed away, me and
Yusuri, I had a dream about him,and I saw his face like on my um
headboard.
Yeah, like saying that likeeverything's gonna be okay and

(20:38):
like all that stuff.
So I've always felt likeconnected to like not death, but
like this sounds so weird.
You can cut this out if it feelsweird, but like death has always
been like interesting to me.
Um, like I first got into itwith like nine, not into it, but
like with 9-11, and like justlike I've like looked up stuff,

(21:01):
like just like interestingthings, but I've had dreams
about him since he's passed awayin 2009, and our grand eight,
sorry, 2008.
Yeah, that too.
Um, and then our grandma in2001, sorry, 2021.
Um like very vivid dreams to thepoint where like I've wake up,

(21:23):
I've woken up like with tears inmy eyes, like crying, because
it's like I know that it's notreal.
Yeah.
I've had very like loose, I havelucid dreams, and it's like I'll
have actual dreams.
Like their house has been like,of course, like purchased,
repurchased and like remodeled,but like my dreams will be about
like how their house was, like,when we like were going there.

SPEAKER_02 (21:43):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (21:43):
And to the point where like it feels so real.
Like our grandpa would like siton the same side of the couch
they always used to sit on, andjust like I would just see like
our grandmother, like very so.
I feel like I have like they'revisiting you, that's all that is
stuff like, but it's like sofrequent, and like I have dreams
about like our house, like ourparents' house, like they're you

(22:05):
know, still here, but it's justlike we don't live there
anymore, so I have dreams aboutthat, and then I don't know, so
it's like I'm connected to that,and then I told Tri about this,
like not my buddy, but like onetime like in college sophomore
year, I saw a girl that I namedAbby at the door in a white

(22:26):
dress, a little girl that she'slike my ghost.

SPEAKER_00 (22:30):
Um interesting, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (22:33):
Um, and it didn't scare me, it was just like, oh
hey girl.
She didn't say hey girl, butlike she was there, and like I
have seen her, I had seen hersince then.
Um so it was only one time?
No, it was a few times.

SPEAKER_02 (22:45):
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (22:46):
Um at college.
That's the first time ithappened.

SPEAKER_02 (22:49):
You saw her at home too.

SPEAKER_03 (22:51):
Yeah, at home.

unknown (22:52):
Oh wow.

SPEAKER_03 (22:52):
So I don't know if it was like a dream, because
sometimes like you're dreaming,but it's like like you kind of
like freak yourself out.
Sleep paralysis.
Yeah, like you're telling themwhat dream against reality.
Yeah, it's a dream that feelsreal.
Real, yeah.
But I I do believe in ghosts andlike things because I saw our
grandpa the day the night thathe passed away, and his face

(23:13):
said and his voice was justlike, you're everything's gonna
be okay, like you're gonna beokay, and like um multiple
dreams about that, and I've haddreams about like this might be
controversial, but I've haddreams about like being a slave
and like running from like slaveowners and like so real and
dreams about being on theTitanic, because I like had

(23:36):
watched a show before, but it'sjust like I know sometimes I say
like you you have dreams aboutthings that like you had just
watched before you go to sleep,but it's like I don't watch my
grandparents' house before I goto sleep, but it's like I've had
vivid dreams since they'vepassed about like their house
and like us being there, and Ifeel like we missed out on
taking our kids to our house,their grandparents, because like

(23:58):
our parents moved out, they'redivorced, so it's like that's
how we grew up, like going toour grandparents' house.
So I've had vivid dreams aboutour kids being at the house they
never knew, yeah.
Um, yeah, and I wake up like sadbecause I'm like, that's what
you always want, or whatever.
And then I don't know, thatstuff like interests me, and

(24:18):
like I said, I do believe inghosts, I believe in like
spirits, and like I don't knowlike what they're from, or it's
just like they haven't quitecrossed over yet.
They have like some things tolike um have unfinished
business, but I also I seecardinals all the time, and sure
and I talk about this with herdad, like it's like, oh, it's so
and so, or it's so and so, andit's like I believe in that

(24:39):
stuff too.
I know some people believe inlike feathers, yeah.
Um I don't hear voices, I'm notlike that, but like in my
dreams, I don't have vividdreams about people who have
passed, very vivid, like it'sreal, but to the point where
it's like I know that like I'mfully consciously aware that
they have passed and that it's adream.

(25:01):
So is it only your grandparents?
Um, the ones that have passed,yes, but I've had dreams about
like like my dreams I've hadabout slavery, like I can have
it's to the point where like I fI am oh something just flew in.

unknown (25:17):
Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 (25:18):
Um, so I'm aware that like I'm dreaming.
It was down there that I'mdreaming and that I'm like
running from them, but I'm likeyou're in a dream, you're in a
dream, you're in a dream, you'rein a dream.
Or dream is about me like thisis really weird, but dream is

(25:41):
about me like being in thesituation where there is
somebody like being an activeshooter, and I'm well aware, and
you're like, I'm like, I tellmyself in the dream, like, this
is just the dream, like you'regonna be okay.
But it's like I experienced thewhole entire experience in the
dream, but my mind's like,you're it's just the dream, and

(26:02):
I'll wake up like freaked out.
Wake up like freaked out.
But I've had very lucid dreams.
I mean, I have them all the timeabout slavery, like everything.

SPEAKER_02 (26:18):
But lucid, isn't that where you can control what
happened or like what you do?

SPEAKER_03 (26:24):
I think inception, yes, because it's like in some
dreams where like I'm runningfrom like people that are
holding me captive.
It's like I know that I'mrunning, I'm like, I have to
run, but then I'm also just likethis is just a dream, Tawana,
but you still have to like Ihave them kind of like play the
dream and I have to remindmyself in the dream.

SPEAKER_00 (26:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (26:45):
Cause it's like I feel like actually like afraid,
but I'm just like you're justdreaming, it's just a dream,
right?
But I'm like, you still have tolike complete like the task
before you're able to get out ofthe dream.
Yeah.
Um, so I guess that's my side ofintuition, but I do want to get
into the I do want to experiencethe intuition that you don't
know you said that you mentionedyesterday offline that like um

(27:08):
you didn't mention with yourgrandmom, but I know you
mentioned like meditating hashelped you like come more in
touch with yourself.
Yeah, and I said, especially forwomen, we have been taught to
like otherwise our intuition,like oh, that gut feeling, or
it's like if you're aroundsomebody and they don't make you
feel like quite right and likeyour stomach kind of hurts,
she's like, Oh, I ate somethingwrong, but it's like you feel
like that every single timeyou're with that person, it's

(27:28):
like that's your system tellingyou that you don't need to be
around that person, like that'syour intuition, that's your gut,
or whatever you want to call it.
Yeah, I feel like women have thestrongest intuition out of like
men and women, just because it'slike as women, we this may sound
weird, but like processinformation, we're the vessels
of life, like we carry life, soit's like we kind of have to

(27:49):
have that connection becauseit's like we are carrying and
making life, so it only makessense.
But I feel like it's concernedwoo-woo, and like we're taught
to ignore it, but it's likesituations where it's like
something told me to like dolike call this person or like
not go down that road.
I went down there and soundlike, oh, like you're just being
crazy, and like somethinghappened.

SPEAKER_02 (28:10):
Well, mommy will say that too.
Like, something told me to reachout to so and so, yeah, and then
she finds out that likesomething's happened they were
going through something, or thatthey like one time it happened
and it was like the person hadjust passed.
So, yeah, it's I don't know whoor where it comes from, but I

(28:31):
also feel like we're maybe doyou have an idea where you're
gonna so really it's aconnection from God, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (28:39):
Okay, or like not all or your whatever you believe
in.
Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And the reason why you don'tunderstand it is because we
don't receive messages the sameway as a higher power delivers
them.
That's true, and so when I dolike the meditations or spending
quiet time with myself, I'm ableto kind of focus and like really

(29:04):
be present because I feel thatthe more present you are, the
more open you are to receivingthe messages and what I call
them downloads to understandlike not a hundred percent,
because we'll never a hundredpercent know, right?
But it's a way of understandingthat this is something I need to

(29:28):
trust, and every time ithappens, I need to trust it.
Okay, so it's a process, yeah,and just like you know, with
anything else, it takespractice.
Oh, yeah, and even someone whois like super attuned have their
own practices and they are ableto truly connect, and like for

(29:49):
me specifically, is I'll getdownloads like in the shower.
Okay, I'll get them like notjust being transparent.
I'm in the I'm on.
Pull it in the bathroom.

SPEAKER_03 (30:00):
Like randomly, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (30:02):
I'm in the car driving.
Like, I have a best friend thatlives in Nashville, and you
know, I'm by myself driving, andI'll get these downloads while
I'm like by myself.
Yeah.
Or it could just be, like Isaid, in a dream, yeah.
Where I might need to reach outto somebody.
Okay.
And you may not know why, but Ineed to reach out to that
person.
Yeah.

(30:22):
And so instead of questioningwhy I got this message or why I
feel this way, the more youtrust it, the sharper the tool
is.

SPEAKER_03 (30:32):
I get that.
And I think it's also abouttrusting yourself too.
To know how to trust yourself.
Right.
But also, like, I'll get thatstuff for like people will
randomly, their names willrandomly pop into my mind.
And it's like, oh, that's like aa trigger to be like, oh, text
them, and like I'll forget tolike text them.
But it's like I've been workingon like as soon as they pop into

(30:53):
my mind, like if I can to likereach out to them, because
there's obviously a reason why.

SPEAKER_00 (30:57):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (30:58):
Yeah.
And sometimes I'll trace it backand be like, oh, was I like I
was thinking about like this,and oh, that's why that reminds
me of that person.
So it's sometimes it's not likeyou need to text, sometimes it's
just like, oh, you're thinkinglike a like a memory or
something.

SPEAKER_01 (31:09):
Yeah.
And it doesn't always have to belike that person is right
through anything specific, butthey may just need to hear from
someone.
Yeah.
And you are that someone at thattime.
And I I consider it you're justbeing like an instrument for
spirituality.
Like you are the vessel that youknow a higher power is

(31:32):
delivering through you to thatperson.

SPEAKER_03 (31:35):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (31:35):
In that moment in time, because that is what the
calling is needed for.

SPEAKER_03 (31:40):
I think we all have little moments like that, like
in our own way, because the daybefore I found out that I even
knew I was pregnant with RJ, myfirst, I was I was like having a
corona or something, and I waslike, this is gonna be my last
drink for a minute.
And like we were trying, so it'slike it's okay, cool, that makes

(32:00):
sense.
But like, I was like, Oh, okay,cool.
And the next day I took a testand I found out I was pregnant.
I was like, and I always referback to them just like I was
spot on.
It was just like something.

SPEAKER_01 (32:11):
I had the same thing with Sanaa.

SPEAKER_03 (32:13):
I was like this my last drink for a bit.
Like I continued drinking, andobviously at that point he had
already been conceived because Ifound out the next day that I
had taken a like I was pregnant,yeah.
But I was just like, hmm, okay,cool.
And the next day I was like, ohmy gosh, I was right.
Yeah.
I was right.
Yeah.
And then for my second, I didn'thave that, but I still don't

(32:36):
know where, but like his name tome came out of like nowhere,
like Harrison.
Like nowhere.
And I was like, where did thatcome from?
And I just went with it.

SPEAKER_02 (32:46):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (32:47):
And I don't know where it came from because it
wasn't like I was like lookingfor it because that had never
been in my head.
It just I was like, oh,Harrison.
Okay, cool.
We're going with it.
We're going with it, why not?
Whatever.

unknown (32:58):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (32:58):
I was like, it fits him, it fits him well.
He's Harry, Harrison, you know,Ronald, Ronald Jr.
RJ.
But I don't know.
And I also drew something forlike things that happened before
they happen, but like not badthings, just like I don't know.
I think it's all interesting,and I feel like getting to it is

(33:18):
the everyone's journey isdifferent, but I like what you
were saying, Jockary, about likelearning to just go with it
without questioning, strengthensthat skill more, and it's
actually opening you up to morelike opportunities and stuff in
life.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (33:32):
Like something you never would have like agreed
because I've actually met a lotof people being open to it, and
that's why I always tell people,you know, be open to things.
Like you may not always, Iguess, have the best experience
every single time, but be opento what the day or adventure may

(33:54):
bring.
Because I have a lot of friendsthat I've met like randomly.

SPEAKER_03 (33:58):
Is that because someone something or a dream
told you, like, hey, you'regonna go to this store today, or
like you're gonna walk by thestreet today, you're gonna see
somebody, or like so.

SPEAKER_01 (34:07):
I'll give you a perfect example.
I have a friend, I was actuallyon the way to an open mic
performance, and um my one of myother friends was the host.
Okay, and I couldn't find it,and I didn't want to call him
because of course he's the hostand he can't be disturbed.
Yeah, yeah.
But I also was lost, and I'mlike, I don't know how to get

(34:30):
there.
And so there happened to be acar driving down the street, and
I never do this.
I live in Atlanta, Georgia, soI'm just gonna be completely
transparent.
It's not always safe sometimes,okay?
And I was on the side of town,it was nighttime, you know, and
I never do this, but somethingwas like, stop that car.

(34:52):
Were you driving?
I was driving, okay.
Trying to find myself.
I was by myself.
Okay.
And so something told me to stopthe car, and I asked the person,
I didn't even know who was inthe car.
I couldn't really tell if it wasa male, female, or whatever.
But happened to be a female, awoman.
I don't like saying female forwhatever reason, but whatever.
It happened to be a woman, and Iwas like, Hey, are you going to

(35:13):
this event?
And she was like, Yeah, I can'tfind it.
And I was just like, Let's findit together.
Let's do this.
And so we ended up finding it.
And so um, she was also going byherself.
Okay.
And so I was gonna be performingbecause I was getting out to
like doing my poetry at thetime.
And so I was like, Well, do youmind?
She's like, Well, can I sit withyou when we go?

(35:35):
I said, Yeah, sure, girl, youcan sit with me.
You help me find this place.
And so I was like, Well, do youmind recording me when I go up
on stage?
Okay, and she was like, Yeah, Istill talk to her to this day.
I met her in 2019.
Was she also performing?
No, she just was going toattend.
Okay.
And so when I say, I don'tnormally in this situation stop

(35:57):
a random car at night.

SPEAKER_03 (35:58):
Because it could have been anybody, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (36:00):
You know what I mean?
In Atlanta, Georgia.

SPEAKER_03 (36:01):
As a woman, as a black woman in Atlanta, Georgia.

SPEAKER_01 (36:05):
You see what I'm saying?
But like what I said about beingpresent and trusting it.
Yeah, I felt compelled to stopher.
Okay.
And she's actually a reallygreat friend.
Okay.
You know, like we still hang outto this day.
Like, you know, she cooks meals.
I come over.
Very nice.
Like, when I tell you she throwsdown, and you know, being her

(36:26):
friend has, you know, you know,been really nice.
We hang out and we do thingstogether, and she sings and
she's into poetry as well.
So I found somebody else that Icould also enjoy those
experiences with.
And it was all because I wasopen to it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so that's what I mean whenlike sometimes you don't
necessarily have to get a signthat says, Oh, you need to talk

(36:48):
to this person.
But it was being open to thefact that, hey, maybe I can
trust this person.
Yep.
And then look at what it led to.
Yeah.
I have another grown-up friend,you know, we knew some of the
same people because we went tothe same middle school, but we
didn't know each other.
But anyway, um, I just kind ofknew she knew some of my same

(37:09):
people.
I was like, hey, I don't knowwhy we never met officially, but
we know some of the same people.
You want to come to my birthdayparty?
Right?
That's just how I am.
And she was like, sure.
She came to my birthday party.
This was my 30th birthday.
That was a minute ago.
No offense.
Yeah, you I'll cut that out.
No, it's fine.
I I grace I accept my age.

SPEAKER_03 (37:31):
I'm gonna be further from 30 next week than I am
right now.
You are already than I am,currently am.

SPEAKER_01 (37:39):
Okay, but yeah, she came to my birthday party.
And we've been friends eversince, and she's like one of my
really close friends.
All because I was open toinviting her.
Yeah, and she's a really goodfriend, and I found that people
that I've been open to meetingand you know, getting to know
have actually been betterfriends to me than people I've

(38:02):
known since I was younger.
I love that, yeah.
Like people always say day one,day one friends are like, you
know, the best, but sometimesthose day two friends are even
better.

SPEAKER_03 (38:12):
Yeah.
What were you gonna say, Shri?
Talking about our age.
No, no, no.
Before that, she like made agesture that she was gonna say
something, but then you weren'tdone talking, so she held it.

SPEAKER_02 (38:24):
I don't remember.

SPEAKER_03 (38:24):
Okay.

SPEAKER_02 (38:26):
Um yeah, I mean, not necessarily intuition related,
but it's kind of a segue intothe other piece of things that
we wanted to talk about.
You were saying um that you'revery interested in.
I don't think it's maybe it isdeath.
I mean, you can speak foryourself, but I feel like you
just have a hello! You'refascinated with like tragic

(38:48):
events.
I am! And I feel like it elicitsthis like emotional response
that you're not usually able to.
Oh my god, that's sofascinating, Tri that you said
that.
Okay, but my point in saying itis I'm the complete opposite.
You are when things like thathappen.
I when you were like, yeah, Ilistened to like voicemails from

(39:09):
9-11, and you like read the bookon Sandy Hook, and I'm like, you
don't know.
You're like, I would suggest youstop doing that.
So I was talking to my husbandabout it at dinner the other
night because it stuck with me.
I got this feedback from asupervisor in my very first
internship in 2020, 2019, maybe.

(39:30):
Um, because I was like, I wasdoing a helpline at the time,
and I was like, people arecalling me, telling me this
traumatic thing that they justwent through, and I'm walking
away from the experience, like Iwent through it myself, and she
was like, You're an avid reader,right?
I said, Yeah, you're also anavid empath, yeah.
But she only knew me as like Ilike to read.

(39:52):
She was like, You have a reallyvivid imagination, and in order
to empathize with people, youput yourself in the describing
so you can understand howthey're feeling.

SPEAKER_01 (40:04):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (40:05):
Um be a place of solace for their yeah, but
that's something that I had tolearn with like, I don't have to
like I don't have to be in thatairport with them.
You know what I mean?
Because I walked away withliteral like secondary trauma,
like having nightmares aboutthese things as if I went
through it myself.
So I had to really figure outwhat the boundary looked like,

(40:26):
but I held on to that feedbackbecause I like when things
happen like that, like massshootings or things that you're
like, oh my god, this thinghappened, and I'm like doing a
deep dive and down a rabbithole.
I absolutely I have to stop.
You shut down because evenhearing about it, I'm it's just
too much.
Yeah.
Also the work that I do, I'malready in a lot.

(40:48):
Yeah.
There's only a little bit left.
I need like funny light stuff.

SPEAKER_03 (40:52):
So I've like chat GBT'd this.
Sorry.
Are you done?
No, but okay, go ahead.
Please continue.

SPEAKER_02 (40:58):
I was just gonna say that the avid reader portion,
because I know we were alsogonna talk about books and
stuff, that just it'sinteresting that we can all love
to read and be avid readers, butwe also are very different in
other areas.
Like you love tragedy.

SPEAKER_03 (41:14):
That sounds weird, guys, but it's like yeah, yeah.
I have to protect myself.
I don't love it, but like it'sinteresting for you.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so I chat GBT'd the heckout of this, like being a Libra,
Libra, October Libra woman, um,where it's just like I can be
very emotional, but it's alsolike I'm interested in tragedy

(41:39):
because I know like cause mysign or the scales, so it's like
I weigh things, so it's like Iknow that like life can't be all
bad, it can't be all good.
It's like a mix of things, soit's like I I'm gonna have to
like pull up the history of it,but it's just like I need like a
dose of that to like look at,then also a dose of like happy,

(42:00):
it's just I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 (42:01):
It's it's so you'll you'll listen to a 9-11
voicemail and then you'll what'sthe balance?

SPEAKER_03 (42:08):
Well, there's only one that's out there.
What the guy from Flight 93?
That's the only one that's outthere.
Um that I've listened to.
Um, that wasn't a voicemail,it's a 911 call.

SPEAKER_02 (42:20):
Um I'm talking about like people on the plane, like
probably my loved one that'sgoing down.
You said you've listened tothose.
I mean I have maybe.

SPEAKER_03 (42:27):
Um but then also the like for back in the day I used
to read like quote pages forlike hours.
Like sad quotes.
It's just like oh, we used toread chicken soup.
Oh yeah.
That's happy though.
I used to read Holly's quotesand I said, No, it was not
always happy.
Oh, okay.
I'm sorry guys.
Did you forget?

(42:48):
No.
Um, I'm very relaxed.
People are allowed to live theirlife.

SPEAKER_02 (42:56):
It just scared me.
Okay.

SPEAKER_03 (42:57):
Um, what were you saying?
You were saying how like becauseI can't live out that emotion in
my life.

SPEAKER_02 (43:04):
It just elicits, like, it forces you to cry, or
like, maybe not cry, but havethat emotional response that you
otherwise just don't access.

SPEAKER_03 (43:16):
Okay.
That's my guess.
That's interesting.
Um, I'm just interested inthings that Saturday night I'm
like out the whole populationmight not be fully interested
in.

SPEAKER_01 (43:27):
Like, I don't know.
Okay, so I'm gonna tell about myexperience with the the tragedy
tragic stuff.
So remember that website of likeI can't remember the name of it,
but it was like tragic deaths,like people's heads getting
chopped off and cut off.
No, you don't remember thiswebsite?
It's not the dark web.
No, no, no.
It was actually a website whereyou could like see very graphic

(43:52):
stuff.
No, and usually it was aroundlike injuries, like someone's
arm getting cut off, or liketheir guts getting spilled up.
I don't remember the name,though I wish I remembered, but
anyway, it was interestingbecause it was something that
you weren't familiar with, yeah.
And it also was something thatyou wouldn't ordinarily see in

(44:12):
your regular lifetime, probably.
And then also it was like Inever knew this could happen.
You know what I mean?
And so I would watch it and likeit would be interesting, but I
wasn't sad watching it.

SPEAKER_02 (44:30):
Does that make sense?
You were just like fascinated.

SPEAKER_01 (44:33):
I was just fascinated now.
Something along the lines of9-11 or act, you know, an active
shooter or something like that.
That I might have moreconnection to be in, like
empathetic, because I am anempath as well.
Yes, but I felt like that wasjust basically I was watching
the experience as it happened,okay, and not necessarily like

(44:55):
identifying with the emotionthat came with what happened.

SPEAKER_03 (45:00):
So I will say from this conversation, the three of
us, Tawana, Jocker, and Cherie,we have all been fully
therapeutized because we areusing words that are only spoken
to spoken with in therapy.
And I love that.
Growth.
And we are talking about thingsthat you only talk about with

(45:22):
your therapy, not only, but it'slike you don't talk about this
stuff with your friends unlessthey've also been therapatized.
But I love that for us.
Yeah, I love that.
Like you can so me beingtherapatized, I can tell when
other people have been have toobeen therapized, and also people
who have not been therapatized.
Yeah, yeah.
Um, no, but I get that.

(45:43):
Um, but I also love Cherie'sreaction when she's like, I need
to protect my peace.
Like, I like I understand that'shappening, but like I can't get
into that.
And uh, and it's very importantfor her lana work as well.
1000%.
And way before I became a mom, Iwas always into true crime,
always.
It's a lot of people who areinto true crime though.

SPEAKER_02 (46:02):
Yeah, I also had to cut that off for myself though.

SPEAKER_03 (46:04):
Um becoming a mom, I'm still kind of into it, but
like I'll listen to likeDateline and stuff like that,
like the podcast.

SPEAKER_02 (46:11):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (46:12):
But when it comes to certain things, like true crime
about like certain things, I canno longer like delve into having
kids because it the connectionfeels too real for me.
Yeah.
Um, other things I'm like fine,not fine, but like it won't like
affect me.
Like, yeah.
But I don't know.
I just think we're allinteresting.

(46:32):
We are all three different signshere.
We're a cancer, we're a Gemini,we're a Libra.
Um, all three different months.
And Sheree do you know your topthree?

SPEAKER_02 (46:44):
I think I'm Gemini, Libra, Libra.

SPEAKER_01 (46:46):
Oh, I'm Libra Libra Scorpio.
Um Cancer Gemini Leo.
Oh.
My rising is Gemini.
Love.
I love love.
We welcome you.
And it's crazy because mydaughter's a Gemini and my dad's
a Leo.
Oh yes! That's it, that isinteresting.
Yeah.

(47:07):
Um we were talking about ourzodiac signs and like how you're
like, I'm a June cancer.

SPEAKER_00 (47:14):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (47:15):
And Cherie is a May Gemini.
My daughter's a May Gemini, too.
And I I honestly feel that it'sa difference.

SPEAKER_02 (47:22):
I agree.
I my best friend is a Julycancer.

SPEAKER_01 (47:25):
So And it's the difference between the July and
the June cancer.
Please don't get me on to that.
Next.
Uh oh.

SPEAKER_02 (47:31):
Um, RJ's a July cancer.
I love January.
We love a July cancer.

SPEAKER_01 (47:35):
She said I love him.
Thank you for loving my child.
No, I love him, and he's stillyoung.
He hasn't gotten to that pointyet.
But those July cancers areinteresting.
But yeah.
My other cousin is also OctoberLibra.
Her birthday is October the16th.
Okay.
I don't know much about theNovember side.

(47:55):
Wait, is it?
No, it's um September andOctober.
Okay.
Y'all don't know many SeptemberLibras.

SPEAKER_03 (48:01):
So Libras, we're interesting.
Everything is ruled by ouremotions.
It's funny because I act like Idon't have any sometimes, but
because of that, I act the waythat I do.
We're like, I am ruled by them.

SPEAKER_01 (48:13):
We're like your moon sign again.

SPEAKER_03 (48:15):
Uh Scorpio.

SPEAKER_01 (48:17):
Okay.
So that means you have somewater sign in your chart.
I'm fully air.
Oh, you are.
You are.

SPEAKER_03 (48:26):
Yeah.
I'm a mix of uh water and air.

SPEAKER_00 (48:29):
Oh.

SPEAKER_03 (48:30):
I fully embraced my Libra.
I'm full Libra.
And where it's like, oh, youhave certain ailments like on
your body, like my low back,that's like an ailment because
it's I don't know.
I forgot what the reason is.

SPEAKER_02 (48:43):
I used to look that up too because my said that it
was um were more prone to upperrespiratory things, which I
always used to get strep throat.
Yeah, I used to get anxious tobe.

SPEAKER_01 (48:53):
I used to get strip through it all the time too.
Because my best friend is aGemini and my daughter is a uh
both May Geminis.
My best friend got COVID, so shehad like upper respiratory,
yeah, you know, breathing andlike her lungs, and then Sanai
has allergies.
Makes sense.

SPEAKER_03 (49:10):
But for Libra, it says like you like like the
October Libra.
Well, Libra, I guess.
Um, you like the finer things inlife, like you really value like
relationships and likefriendships and like being seen
for like who you are.
Like you just said that today.
Yeah.
I mean, I feel like I fullyembody what I was meant to be,

(49:33):
which is an October Libra.

SPEAKER_02 (49:35):
It's interesting because I'm on the cusp.
You are always not that I claimto be both.
I always if someone asks I claimto be Gemini.
Yes.
When I would read my horoscopes,I would always read both, and I
felt like I demand the line attimes.

SPEAKER_03 (49:53):
But I was getting my hair done, and but that's weird
because you would align with youalign with the sign that's
before yours.

SPEAKER_02 (50:00):
The rising sign.
Some days or some horoscopeshave um Gemini starting on the
22nd.
22nd.

SPEAKER_01 (50:08):
That's what Draco Ray was saying.

SPEAKER_03 (50:09):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (50:09):
It does get confusing with the days when
it's the because some of themend on the 22nd and begin on the
21st.
Yes.
Or then you would be the cancer.

SPEAKER_02 (50:17):
No, no, no.
It's either Tarse or Gemini.
Because I'm at the verybeginning of Gemini.

SPEAKER_03 (50:22):
Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 (50:23):
Okay.

SPEAKER_02 (50:24):
The rising sign is the most accurate horoscope for
you, just FYI.
I never read Libra.
But I feel like I'll read Geminiand I'm like, that doesn't sound
like me.
Or just the way that Gemini'sare stereotyped, and like, that
doesn't sound like me.

SPEAKER_01 (50:37):
Start reason, start reading the rising sign and see
if it uh resonates.

SPEAKER_02 (50:42):
Yeah.
And see if it resonates.
But I mentioned that to someonewho is a May Taurus.
Okay.
I don't know, maybe in theteens.
Okay.
And I was like, I'm a Gemini,but I'm on the cusp.
And she was like, no, baby,you're a Gemini.
Like, claim that.
I was like, I'm not ashamed toclaim it.
Like, yeah.
I just, I'm on the cusp.
I mean You're 21st.

(51:03):
It is what it is.
And I was like, also, you don'teven know me, so settle down.
Calm down.
This is not a battle of thesigns, but exactly.

SPEAKER_03 (51:15):
I just feel like as we get older, we should fully
embrace who we are.
Like I'm a full Libra.
I own it.

SPEAKER_02 (51:24):
Yeah, but I guess you have to.
Well, no, you're Libra forrising too.
No, she said her Scorpio.

SPEAKER_03 (51:30):
I thought you were Libra, Libra Scorpio.

SPEAKER_01 (51:31):
I'm Libra, Libra, Scorpio.
Oh, so then your moon is Scorpiothen.

SPEAKER_03 (51:36):
I said that.
I'm Bill.
So you're rising is that I am.
Phil.
I'm double.
I am who I am.
I can't change it.
So it's really weird becauselike I have been known to like
come off as a bitch and like.
Are we saying that?
Yeah, I don't care.
It's our podcast.
Um be like that and like comeoff as like really like not

(52:02):
cool.
Uh not not cool, but like needlike a disclaimer to deal with
me.
But like at the end of the day,I literally feel like I will
ride for the people that I knowwill ride for me.
Um my oldest loves hard justlike I do.
Um my youngest, yeah, just in asunway.

(52:24):
Um I just want to be loved forwho I am.
And you will be.
But I'm not changing.
I will be where I am.
I'm saying open yourself up toit.
I my sister knows me.
Well, we're not talking aboutSir Cherie.
Sister Sheree, are you a nun?
I didn't say sister.
You don't.
We didn't talk about Cherie.
Okay, we'll roll the tape back.
Um I feel like I am who I am,and the people that are in my

(52:50):
corner and that love me, like,know that.

SPEAKER_02 (52:53):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (52:54):
Agreed.
Like, I will shut things off ifI don't want to talk about it.
Like I hit record when I didn'tfeel like talking about what we
were talking about.
Yeah, you tried that multipletimes.
It worked this time becausewe're recording right now.
And we'll probably get back intoit when we start driving.
But I am who I am.

SPEAKER_02 (53:14):
I am too.

SPEAKER_03 (53:15):
You are?
I and I'm 1,000% obsessed withyou and your daughter.

SPEAKER_02 (53:20):
Yeah.
And so that was my segue.
I'm like.

SPEAKER_03 (53:23):
And your um husband, so you're stuck with me?

SPEAKER_02 (53:26):
It's pretty cool.

SPEAKER_03 (53:26):
Yeah, he's okay.
I'm just kidding.
He's awesome.

SPEAKER_02 (53:28):
Love you, Brandon! I was thinking about that the
other night.
Remember when we came over toplay the Wii with you for your
birthday?
I think RJ had just been born,and we were obviously kidless.
Yeah.
So we just like came and playedWii.
That was so fun.

SPEAKER_03 (53:42):
Yeah.
Was that the same year that umhe took me to that place we saw
in Housewives in Virginia?
Oh, maybe.

SPEAKER_02 (53:52):
Yeah, I think RJ was first born.
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (53:54):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (53:55):
Not Brandon.

SPEAKER_03 (53:56):
No, I know, but we know.
I was like, no.
I love Brandon.
He's a cool cat.
Sometimes I feel like I'm like,oh yeah, he's so cool or
whatever.
Then like when we're around,like I don't always say like hey
first, but I kind of just likearrive.

SPEAKER_02 (54:15):
I feel like he has because he's so cool and like
very self-assured.
He is literally could not givetwo fucks away first so that you
just arrive.
He's just like I know.
I thought about that earlier.

SPEAKER_03 (54:27):
I was like, oh my god.
I was just like, he just is likeCherie just told me how much
like he like like loves me andlike how cool I am.
I was like, I don't even likenot that I don't say hi first,
but I'm just like, wow, Tomana,I wonder what he thinks about
you now.
Literally nothing.
I know.
I don't mean that in a bad way.

SPEAKER_02 (54:42):
No, like literally nothing.
Like, he's the most unbotheredperson I've ever met.
I'm like guys are simple, theydon't be thinking of it.

SPEAKER_03 (54:50):
I'm obsessed, and I just fell in love with him even
more when he was over forChristmas one year, and he felt
so comfortable that he fellasleep on our couch.
Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 (54:57):
Oh, I was like, oh my pissed about that.
I was like, I love that.
I'm fighting for my life downhere with these kids, and you
just knock out.

SPEAKER_03 (55:06):
I was like, I love you even more that you're so
comfortable in my house.
Like to do that.

SPEAKER_02 (55:11):
I think a lot of people felt that way after the
wedding because everybody waslike, I've never seen this side
of Brandon.
I was like, I'm- He was at hiswedding! I mean, yeah.
He was at the wedding.
He also said that about me too,which I'm like, yeah, he's his
friend.

SPEAKER_03 (55:23):
Oh, let's also speak about your wedding.
I knew I was obviously gonna begiving a mate of honor speech
from the day it came, but likewhen it came, I was like, oh
shit, like it's here, I can'tback out.
Correct.
And I was like, shit, I'm gonnahave to have some like some
courage with me.
Yeah.
Um, and I feel like I killed it.
No, it was good.

(55:43):
I just like spoke without eventhinking.
I didn't have a speech preparedor anything.
It was good.
From the heart.
And my dad was our dad was like,alright, guys, shh sh like.

SPEAKER_02 (55:53):
Well, and you were like, sorry, I'm getting
emotional.
He's like, it's okay, it's fromthe heart.

SPEAKER_03 (56:00):
And I was like, I literally was like, I'm obsessed
with you and Brandon and like mylittle baby Angel, my little
Seiji Poo.
Yeah, and I'm like, oh my gosh.
But I was just like, I'm givingmy maid of honor speech to my
sister, and I'm like, this isactually happening.
Yeah, and I didn't expect tocry, no offense, because you
know I don't cry, like,whatever.
Anyway, besides the point, I waslike, I'm like crying right now.

SPEAKER_02 (56:23):
Yeah, it made me tear up because I looked at him,
I was like, oh my god, she'scrying.
And he was just like staring atyou, smiling.
I don't know.
It was just like so much love.

SPEAKER_01 (56:33):
Like Julia, so much love.
I felt it.
It was so funny.

SPEAKER_03 (56:37):
I was like, oh my gosh, my sister's like getting
married, and she they both havebirthed the most perfect angel
baby ever, and I'm freakingobsessed with her.
Yes, she is obsessed.
Literally obsessed with myneatness with a D D D.
Like, nobody come for herbecause I will come for your
neck.

SPEAKER_02 (56:55):
I mean fair.

SPEAKER_03 (56:56):
Literally.
And I like kind of I didn'treally understand because when
Sherry was with RJ and I waslike, oh, that's cute.
But I'm like, now I'm like,don't touch her.
Yeah, like you'll help herauntie.
You'll have to come through me,sweetie.
Yeah, and it won't be a goodthing.
I was like, now I understand whyyou're so hardcore, Shrey.
Yep.

(57:17):
Like, what I'm just I get it.
Like, she's hardcore times two,and I'm like, I get it.

SPEAKER_02 (57:24):
I'm just watching this man fly his drone because
that is absolutelyinappropriate.
No, something Brandon would do.
He just like flies his drone inlike places that he's not
supposed to, and just so it'sinappropriate.
Oh, I love it for him.

SPEAKER_03 (57:43):
Mind in his business.
But I just fully want tomeditate.
I want to wah wah pretzel.
I'm gonna have to use therestroom soon.
We do need to go.
We have to go get our children.
I don't even know what time itis because we've been recording.
We can talk about books.
I know.
We can talk about that in thebox of our own selves.

(58:05):
Okay, guys.
I mean, this has been great.
Darkry, thank you so much.
You're welcome for being mypleasure.
I know it is.
Um we love you, we love it, welove you guys.
This is like the th you were onmy podcast.
This is like the second or thirdtime you've been on.

(58:25):
Yeah.
Well s yeah, they're yeah.
Yeah, because you had two withme.

SPEAKER_02 (58:32):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 (58:33):
And I we know Docker's gonna promote the heck
out of this because she lovessupporting her family and
friends, and that she's the kindof person she is.
Um period.

SPEAKER_02 (58:42):
Can you have some good stuff together?

SPEAKER_03 (58:44):
Period.
With a T?

SPEAKER_02 (58:46):
Everybody knew that but you.

SPEAKER_03 (58:47):
I'm gonna participate.
Right.
No, is that period with a T?
Yes.
Periot.

SPEAKER_01 (58:53):
No, yeah, DT.
DT.
Period.
Okay.
Oh my lord.
And on that.
How do you say it?
I just said it.
Say it again.
Period! I just said that.
Period.
No, you're a little it's okay.
You'll get there.

SPEAKER_02 (59:10):
Well, guys, thanks for listening.
Don't forget to like, review,subscribe, and listen.
Yeah, I said the listen part toosoon.
But love you.
Bye everyone.

SPEAKER_03 (59:28):
Don't forget to like, listen, and subscribe.
And also don't forget to leave areview, please, and let us know
what you thought about today'sepisode and all the other
episodes.
Thanks, guys.
Talk to you soon.
Bye.