Episode 44 - “Show Up and Be Present” with Jessica Gershman - Untethered and Prosperous

Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
I think time, you know,which is the most valuable asset, has
a lot to do with prosperity.When you have the time to really show
up and be present for the thingsthat matter to you in your relationships with
your children, if you have them, that you are living a prosperous life.
When when you're able to show upand be in those moments, it

(00:22):
takes some time to reduce the stressto live in a prosperous life. You
know, we look at success andwhat it's measured, and it's really easy
to say success is measured in dollarsand cents, But for me, success
is a lot about time and beingable to show up and whether that's getting
back to my why on why Igot into this business is to help others

(00:43):
and and looking at reframing kind ofthis idea of success and taking it away
from this very martyr like well,if you're run ragged at the end of
the day and you just you fallasleep, and you know when your head
hits the pillow because you're so exhausted, are you prosperous? Are you really
living? Are you really experiencing joyin life? And for me, it's

(01:06):
being able to experience those joyful momentsto really show up and be present like
that is prosperity to me. Heyit's way, and you're listening to Untethered
and Prosperous, the podcast where wefocus on the two biggest things passionate,
purpose driven entrepreneurs need to untether tobecome wildly prosperous and successfully happy. And

(01:30):
those two huge anchors are bad moneystories and chronic self sabotage. So what
we do is have real and inspiringconversations with amazing entrepreneurs who have done just
that. So get ready to getuntethered and get prosperous. Hey, it's
way, and welcome to another episodeof the Untethered and Prosperous podcast, where

(01:55):
it's all about helping you untethered fromthe shackles of what holds a lot of
entrepreneurs back, which is usually aroundbad money stories or chronic self sabotage.
And once again I have an amazingguest can't wait to hear all about her.
Her name is Jessica Gershman and sheis the founder of the Zen Mommy
and the voice behind the mom SlowDown podcast. I love that name and

(02:17):
she's as well as a passionate believerin the power of self care. And
I love that already because that's whatI say to all my students and clients
all the time. Through her workas a certified yoga instructor, an accomplish
home chef yum and a dedicated mindfulnesspractitioner, she has created a holistic program
that supports woman, especially moms,some of the most important human beings on

(02:39):
the planet for our future and ingiving them the tools to create a satisfying
life. So if you're a momand you're wanting or you're thinking about becoming
a mom, get excited because thisis going to be an episode you don't
want to miss. Jessica, welcometo the show. Thank you for joining
us. Yeah, absolutely, thanksfor having me. Yeah. So,

(03:00):
so let's set the context first beforewe dive in, because there's so many
questions I want to ask because Ihad a previous lifetime in the restaurant business
as a foodie and as a generalimagine all these different things, So I
would love to ask some questions aboutthat. But let's help the audience kind
of understand where you're coming from whenas you as a mom, mompreneur,
entrepreneur, and get all the detailsaround that and like the like you know,

(03:23):
like the like the podcast as well. Untethered and prosperous. Let's define
that first for the audience. Whatdoes it mean to become untethered when it
come for you anyway? Yeah,I think I'm telled is interesting and what
it conjurs to me is living freelyand freely is kind of like without restraint,
without shame and guilt. And youknow, women out there listening,

(03:46):
men too, you know, wewalk around with a lot of shame and
guilt as in regards to our relationshipsor past experiences. These definitions that we
think, you know, define ormake up who we are, and so
living I'm tethered is really just lettinggo of all of those stories, narratives,
expletives sometimes or what we think weare and being able to show up

(04:12):
as our true self and live inour aliveness, live in the moment.
Yeah, and I love that thatyou brought up the shame and guilt piece,
because you're right, there's so manyof us, both men and women,
who who carry that around and itisn't like being tethered, if you
will, because the minute something getstriggered, you're brought back to that heavy
weight of feeling ashamed or feeling guiltyor feeling bad for choosing something, especially

(04:36):
when it comes to a lot oftimes when we're especially for moms, right
if you're choosing something that you know, it's something that you want, need,
good for you, and then despitethat, you choose something different because
you're martyring yourself for your kids,or you're martyring yourself for your husband,
or for whoever it is that isin your life. You know, moms
have a propensity to do that,and just because we have the power to

(04:58):
do so, it doesn't mean weshould, right right, you know,
it's interesting with guilts and stuff.I had a really wise teacher asked me
one time, if I, youknow, would you order guilt from a
menu at a sandwich shop, LikeI'd have a turkey sub with a side
of guilt. It's like, no, no one would want that if you
have the choice. But we choosethat to lead with our guilt and lead

(05:18):
with our shame story a lot oftimes and kind of carry it with us
like that five hundred pound bag intoevery situation, and so our perception of
situations things were in whether their entrepreneurialsituations or business or relationships is shrouded or
diluted by this kind of shame andguilt that we drag around with us.

(05:40):
Yeah, and what do you thinkthat is? I mean, I think
everybody has their own journey about howthey decided to have shame and guilty part
of their life, right that sideof shame or side of guilt from your
perspective, why do you think thatis for a lot of people, Because
I'm sure there's lot of people artistgoing, Yeah, I don't even know
how I decided that that was goingto be my thing. Yeah, you

(06:00):
know, the ego is a funnything. When we were babies, you
know, our ego was developed basedon a connection or disconnection with our mother,
and it defined who we were.Our ego also were the stories of
keeping us safe and if we actedin this way, then you know,
our moms would respond in a certainway or the teachers would respond, and
we were kind of molded and shaped. Well, once we became adult,

(06:24):
we don't really need that story anymore, right, you know, those attachment
stories with our parents, the attachmentstories to our experiences. But we still
have that little voice inside our headtelling us about everything. That's going on.
You know, the ego was designedto keep us safe and in line
and all of that as we weregrowing and now we're an adult, we
don't really need it, but it'shard to separate from that story or that

(06:46):
narrative in your head. And eventhough that it's happening. I always say
awareness is the first piece, Soyou have to start to understand what's even
going on in your mind and yourthoughts in your quiet time. Does that
chatter sound like? And once youbuild that awareness piece, then you can
start to choose, hey, Idon't I'm not going to bring that guilt
story or I'm doing that again.You know, you start to notice those

(07:09):
things and then you can start tochoose to let it go right now.
Obviously you do this for your clients, and I'm sure you've done it for
yourself as well. What what what? What would you say was one of
the ways that you were able tountether from that shame and guilt piece that
you grew up with. I mean, obviously it's easy to speak to when
we experience it ourselves, right.Yeah, you know that podcast mom slow

(07:31):
Down as a reason. You haveto slow down in order to start to
make changes. If you're running ata thousand miles a minute and you're constantly
checking things off and boxes on theto do list, and you know you're
managing the emotional and social well beingof your whole family, yourself, your
business, everything that's going on,you don't have time to really sit in

(07:54):
reflection. I mean that's where youknow. For me, it was finding
yoga that was a practice of stillnessand softness and meditation. And within that
frame, when I started to beable to have little glimpse of stillness,
I started to be able to learnthings about myself, things I didn't necessarily
like, things that weren't serving meanymore, whether they were stories or experiences.

(08:18):
And so you've got to slow downto be able to start to become
aware. Yeah, I love that. I mean, stillness is the key,
and it's so anti how most ofus are raised. And I think
we get into this trap of okay, go faster, hoping that whatever is
holding onto us or clinging us,or whatever's tethering to us, it will

(08:39):
fall off somehow, but it doesn't. It just keeps. You just build
this inertia that you don't even noticethat it's still on you because you're going
so fast and until one day youhit a wall and it slams you from
behind as well. Yeah, that'sa perfect visualization, right, And it's
so anti Like again, it's anticulture, anti society, anti everything on

(09:03):
so many different levels. When theysay slow down, it's like no,
no, no, I cancel it. I can't afford to, right,
And there's that and I think whatyou're saying is on from your camp is
like you kind of can't afford notto well, and it's you know,
a lot of it is I'm afraidto slow down. I mean that was
my story for a long time.You know, I'm afraid because the minute

(09:24):
I know I slow down, thatchatter, that busyness, that miss that's
in my head gets real loud.And so you know, we have to
learn to start to sit with alittle bit of that discomfort. We we,
especially as Americans, like to shyaway from things that are uncomfortable,
conversations that are uncomfortable situations. We'relike, no, we don't, we

(09:45):
don't, we don't want to touchthat. But that's all part of it.
You know, you don't get outwithout experiencing a little discomfort and joy.
Yeah, I love that you saidthat, because I think, you
know, a lot of the workthat I do with my own students and
clients is that recognizing that those voicesdon't go away just because you go faster,
just because you keep yourself busy.The voices don't suddenly one day go

(10:07):
okay, well I'm not going tobe here anymore. No, they just
wait till you. There's a littlebit of emptiness that shows up, which
I'm sure like I remember when Idid yoga for the very first time,
it was so noisy. I waslike, shut up, shut up me
right right wow. And so I'msure of you, being a facility of
yoga as well, you probably seea lot of that show up in the

(10:30):
clients that you work with. It'sjust like, what is going on over
there and they're just going a lot. Yeah. I think Shavasna is like
the hardest yoga pose ever of justplaying there and doing nothing. You know.
That was certainly my challenge for thefirst handful of years is to just
make it through and triddle it,you know, try not to fidget and
you know, get uncomfortable and justbeing still, yeah, being dead in

(10:54):
the moment so that you can justbe dissociated just for that moment, right
just to reach out. I mean, that's where that you know, we
need is to be able to slowdown, to recharge. Because you're right,
like you said, all of thesefeelings, experiences, discomfort, mind
chatter doesn't go away just because you'rerunning faster, and eventually it does catch
up because we're not all We can'tall run at one hundred percent all the

(11:16):
time. I mean, things happenin life, and it does, it
doesn't go away if you don't addressthose emotions and the things that are going
on in your life and in yourbody. Eventually they do hit you like
a mactruck and yeah, yeah,a little a little more forceful at that
point, right, Oh yeah,I know that feeling very well. And
I think most of us who dothis work and help others as well,

(11:39):
it's because we've gone through that thatringer with that. You know, I
often say I don't like, Iwouldn't want my worst energy to go through
what I went through as an entrepreneur. So very cool. So that so
I love that definition of what itmeans to become untethered. So let's go
to the flip side of that.So a lot of people become untethered so
that they could create a more prosperouslife. But every body's definition it's different.

(12:01):
So curious what is for you specifically, what does it mean to be
prosperous, what it means to havea prosperous life. I think time,
you know, which is the mostvaluable asset, has a lot to do
with prosperity. When you have thetime to really show up and be present
for the things that matter to youin your relationships with your children, if

(12:22):
you have them, that you areliving a prosperous life. When when you're
able to show up and be inthose moments, it takes some time to
reduce the stress to live in aprosperous life. You know, we look
at success and what it's measured,and it's really easy to say success is
measured in dollars and cents, Butfor me, success is a lot about

(12:43):
time and being able to show upand whether that's getting back to my why
on why I got into this businessis to help others and and looking at
reframing kind of this idea of successand taking it away from this very murdyr
like well, if you're run raggedat the end of the day and you
just you fall asleep and you knowwhen your head hits the pillow because you're

(13:07):
so exhausted. Are you prosperous?Are you really living? Are you really
experiencing joy in life? And andfor me, it's it's being able to
experience those joyful moments, to reallyshow up and be present like that is
prosperity to me. Yeah, Ilove and I love that. And when
I ask you, it's like it'sit's it's almost like an oxymor is,
like have the time to show upto be present? Right, Let's talk

(13:31):
about that a little bit. Whenhe said have the time to be present,
because I know somebody's going to listento that who is not of our
world, so to speak, andwants to get in there, and they
say, what do you mean havetime to be present? I am here,
I am I'm present, right,What do you mean by that?
I might know what you mean,but let's I want to hear from your
perspective. Yeah, having the timeto be present. Yeah, we show
up a lot physically. Our body'sthere, right, whether it's a dinner

(13:56):
with friends or at a business meetingor whatever. But our mind is totally
somewhere else and to show up andreally be present. Number one, you
have to be in your body.You have to be connected, you know,
in your body, in your breath, and really be in the moment,
so outside of our story of themoment, outside of our egos definition

(14:20):
of the moment. And we mostlylive a lot of the time in our
heads. You know. I alwaysuse the example of you know, someone
driven somewhere and realize when they gotthere, like I don't even remember driving
here, or reading a book orreading a contract and you know, having
to reread the same four sentences.You know, you're living in your head,
and so having the time means you'rehaving the mental space right which you

(14:43):
have to create to be able toshow up and really be present. We
can carve out time and just showup and and check it off the box,
check the box, but not reallyever be present with our kids and
our meetings and our jobs, inour relationship, and so to be present
and show up takes time and space, right, time and space. And

(15:09):
so your definition of what it meansto be prosperous is, you know,
is really around that having the timeand freedom right to be able to kind
of be present. But also tomake those choices in life of being there
for your kids and since that's youraudience of moms and everything, and and
being there for your family and alsomaybe being there for yourself. Right,
I'm sure you're seeing with the peopleyour clients that doing yoga that they're not

(15:33):
even present, just going through themotions, but they're not present with those
motions. Now, is this becauseof your own journey that you had to
go through to learn how to bemore present and create and define what it
means to be prosperous. Tell mea little bit more about that, like,
how did you get to this pointof being able to find prosperity that

(15:54):
way? Because is that something youjust grew up with or is that something
that you had to discover on yourown? No, I was. I
was raised by an entrepreneur, andhe started a record business back like when
records were cool in the seventies,and then turned into conversial real estate developer,
and I kind of followed in hisfootsteps. I started my career at
nineteen and was developing shopping centers allover the Midwest, to the point where

(16:18):
I would go in for a meetingand I remember an older gentleman that I
was buying a you know, Idon't know, let's say ten or fifteen
million dollars shopping center at the time, twenty years ago. And he turned
to me in this meeting and andvery egotistically and Macholi said, uh,
sweetheart, you should be buying diamondsin that real estate. Uh. And
so it was that time in business, and yeah, that was a lot.

(16:44):
That was a lot. But Iyou know, I started really young
and early, and I was veryintense and a type A and overachiever,
and you know, I was makinglots of money really young, um,
but really miserable to be honest,experienced career success, an advancement. You
know, I was a had credentialsand some of the youngest people to ever

(17:07):
get certain commercial real estate credentials backin the day. But I was just
unhappy. And you know, Igot married and I had to bonus kids.
And when I started having kids,you know, I really hit myself.
I hit a wall, and itwas making a choice of trying to
figure out what exactly made me happy. And I always say that the teacher

(17:30):
stows up when this student is ready. And I was in a place really
just kind of a desperate place.I'm really opened about suffering from body dysmorphia
and eating disorders in my late teensand early twenties, and it all kind
of went along with that whole perceptionof just being a perfectionist and type A
and super overachiever. And Yeah,I walked into a yoga class after the

(17:52):
birth of my first daughter, andit really was life changing for me.
It was the first time I rememberin my life feeling good enough. Ever,
it was it because you were ableto do the poses right away,
or is just kind of like beingpresent. It was space. It was
like space for my The chatter inmy mind that would go along being you

(18:15):
know, a perfectionist and type Aand overachiever was so intense and so loud.
Like you said in your first yogaclass, You're like, shut up
self, and it was for Itwas for a minute in that yoga class
and I was just like in myown sweat and I was laying in travasna
and there was just a minute ofspace of relief from that constant mental chatter,
and it was like I got alittle taste of what peacefulness felt like

(18:40):
for like the first time in mylife, and I was like, oh,
yeah, I need to find moreof that. And that started,
you know, a thirteen year loveaffair and a lot of self study and
a lot of change and a lotof study all over the country with all
kinds of different yogis and and reallywas the catalyst for me to change.
Yeah, and when did you makethat big leap, you know, the

(19:03):
thirteen year love affair. You said, at some point you made a leap
away from that old career that youwere in into what you're doing now.
How long ago was that. Itwas around the same time, so my
daughter was born, the real estatemarket crashed back into that pre Obama either
and my daughter was born and Obamawas inaugurated, So it would all kind

(19:25):
of coincided like a really beautiful crashat the same time where I was found
myself without a career, struggling tounderstand my own identity as a new mom
and then starting this kind of journeyand yoga showed up for me in a
time and place that felt right thatyou know, I had space to do.
So, yeah, that's amazing.So let's talk at a little bit

(19:45):
about where you are right now,where what the business is as a result
of thirteen years of it putting youknow, having been in practice with it
right and navigating even current times andstill staying within that flow. Let's talk
about where you are in your business, what you know, what you're what
you're doing for your clients now,how you're doing it, and more importantly,

(20:07):
what you feel was the biggest untethering, that need that needed to happen
for you to really step into thisprosperous space of your business. Yeah,
Sarah, I launched an app,this Zen Mommy app, and that's kind
of where the business took a holdwith everything with the pandemic, And I
think the untethering piece is probably whata lot of entrepreneurs and people deal with

(20:30):
this this kind of imposter syndrome.For me, it was continuing to be
on a journey recognizing that I'm human, but also showing up to try to
help others as hard as you're onyour own kind of self reflection journey and
self change that at the same timeyou're modeling for others and helping others and

(20:53):
showing up for others, and youhave a voice inside your head saying you
know where are you? You knowyou still have work to do. You
know, how can you show upand teach another person about joy and happiness
and space and self reflection. Andso I think I'm tethering from that imposter
syndrome and still being able to showup and for that purpose of helping other

(21:17):
women and mothers, which has beenmy passion for over a decade. I
don't think anybody's ever dealt with impostisyndrome as an entrepreneur. I think you're
the only one. You're like theyear yeah, right, exactly. Yeah.
And I was another conversation with anotherguest I think, I think it
was last week or two weeks ago, where I think it was a really

(21:38):
beautiful way to talk about imposter syndrome. Is a realization that she had,
which was that it's actually part ofyour journey of growth that we all go
through an element of that. Andas as we were talking, it made
a lot of sense because whenever youare birthing into a new version of yourself,
it's a version that it's different fromwhat it was before. So of

(22:02):
course there's a little bit of elementit's like, is that really what's happening?
Because it's not it's no longer likethe previous version, like that moment
has passed and now you're in anew life or new version. So it
could feel a little bit imposterous,right, It's like, who am I
to be different again? And Ithink you can. You kind of try
on different personalities and traits and asyou're continuing to grow and you shed the

(22:23):
old you, and the reality isyou're still human. You're still having a
human experience, and you can bein a position of leadership or mentorship and
still also be imperfect and still alsobe struggling. It can be both.
And I think once you start onthe path and journey and evolution, you

(22:44):
never get off, so you're constantlyinvolving and constantly being challenged and you know,
steps forward and back at the sametime. And especially as an entrepreneur,
you the art of the pivot andwhat that looks like and being able
to be mobile and not stuck andrigid are all things that you continue to
grow and evolve, and you cando both and also be in a position

(23:06):
of mentorship to others. And forsomeone that's listening and selling, gosh,
you know, how do you untetherfrom that imposter syndrome so that it doesn't
derail you or paralyze you from movingforward. Because I know a lot of
people, even in my own clientbase, you know, sometimes they deal
with that. They get stopped intheir tracks because they're over questioning the viability

(23:30):
of themselves in doing what they're doing. I think the biggest thing is recognizing
what is real and the stories inyour head and that little voice, that
inner critic or the judge or whateveryou want to call it. The ego
isn't real, That's not really happeningin the present moment. And so for
me to be able to get intothe present moment is to get into my

(23:51):
body. It comes back to thatslowing down. So when I have those
moments of you know, maybe there'ssome chatter on social media that you get
way too deep in, you know, you start questioning your value or your
worth. Is to be still,to meditate, to breathe, to get
out in nature, and I canstart to disengage from some of those imposter

(24:11):
like chatters or imposter syndrome narratives thatwe have that usually centers around some value
of unworthiness right that we've kind ofcarried forward and realize that I am worthy
and give myself space to make alot of mistakes to grow, and so
for me, it's creating that stillnessso that I can start to disengage from

(24:33):
some of that chatter, because itreally isn't real, it's not actually happening.
It's something that we create. Yeah, exactly. I think Mark Twain
said that I've had thousands of problemsin my life, most of which were
never true or something right. Imean, Yoga says the suffering is stuck
in the past or worrying about somethingthat hasn't happened. Being in the future.
I mean, in the real moment, in the truth, in reality,

(24:56):
everything's okay. It's exactly how itshould be. You know, we
get stuck in either you know,in the past or in the future,
and none of that's really real.The pass is never coming back, and
the future is unknown. So I'massuming that your Zen Mommy app and the
business that you have right now essentiallyhelps your clients do that. They help
who find that stillness and through thatstillness be able to kind of unlock what's

(25:19):
possible for them. I am Igetting that right. Yeah, that's a
beautiful way I really wanted when Isat down and said what do I want
to offer and what has made sucha big difference in my life, and
it was kind of three pillars.It was mindset piece, So meditation and
breathwork is key as we talk aboutlike the ego and the chatter and all
that stuff that challenges us. Movementpiece, which you know when we talk

(25:41):
about energy moving our bodies in asafe way, and yoga is available to
all bodies. You know, there'smodifications for everyone. That makes my yoga
practice made such a difference in mylife. And then the other piece was
the nourishment piece that we haven't reallytouched on, but how we fuel our
body makes such a big difference andwhat we have to give out to others.

(26:02):
And so I'm able to offer thesekind of things that made such a
difference in my life and also builda community of other Zen mommies and daddies
so that they could connect with otherpeople, because I think the community piece
is super important that people are surroundedby other like minded individuals that are on
the path, that are on thejourney that you know, can give one

(26:23):
another support. Right, So isyour your business primarily around the app itself
or if people can come in andengage through the app versus because you used
to do a lot of one onone work before. Right, So where
are your businesses right now? Isit still that or a blend of the
two? Where is or it's ahybrid of the two. I'm still seeing

(26:44):
one on one clients that really juststarted back up. As the world is
ever changing all the time. Ican still take clients on Zoom, which
you know a lot of yoga teachersdid over the pandemic. And then obviously
everything surrounded about the app, whichis great because it's accessible to all.
It's just right there on your phone. And I think for people to be
able to start a yoga practice athome where it's safe and comfortable, gives

(27:07):
them more confidence to be able togo into a yoga studio or in their
hometown or wherever they live and continuethat practice. I love that. And
so what do you say to becauseI'm sure there's going to be people that
are listening to this right now andthey're saying, well, I'm I'm I'm
a yoga yoga practitioner, or Ido this and that. How what do
you say to those that are strugglingto create the level of success you've been

(27:30):
able to create. Now, obviouslyyou've had some solid background and knowing what
it takes to work with high networth individuals high volume of financial flow,
and obviously that translated a lot tomaking sure you understood how to make sure
that your business grows and thrives.From a financial standpoint, right, what
do you say to people who arein the same space as you or similar

(27:51):
type of space and holistic healing andyoga practicing or energy work even that can
help them kind of understand, well, what did you do to reate that
success so it sustains itself? Youknow, from a financial standpoint, I
think it's our continuing to put yourselfout there. I think a lot of
people cut themselves short or sell themselvesshort in the wellness based specifically is what

(28:15):
I can speak to. But continuingto put yourself out there, never always
asking questions always, you know,I always say that that no, the
worst thing that someone would say isno, So asking questions, And whether
it's going after other clients or beinginvolved in corporate wellness or whatever it is
that you want to do that maybeyou think it's outside of your reach.

(28:36):
Is continuing to put yourself out there, which takes a lot of vulnerability and
a lot of awareness, and youknow, it's hard because you're going to
get a lot of nos, Ithink along the way, but there will
be the yeses. So continuing toput yourself out there I think is most
important. Yeah, and were thereany bad money stories or self sabotage patterns
you had to kind of deal withwhile you're building the business or even law

(29:00):
launching an app, because I knowa lot of it. I want to
do an app, but there's alwaysthese blocks and they never launched. It's
kind of like writing a book.Right, Oh, I have an app
idea and then they never launch it. Yeah, it's hard, I think,
you know, for me, becausemoney wasn't the biggest driving force,
is that you have to remember thatit's also important in the long term.

(29:21):
And so I think surrounding yourself withthe best people, asking a lot of
questions, reaching out for help,creating a team, recognizing that as an
entrepreneur you cannot do everything yourself andthat there are people that are more qualified
to do things like marketing or appdevelopment. Right. I tried for several

(29:42):
days and trying to do my ownapp and realized, you know, after
many many tiers and frustrations that youknow, that was better money served somewhere
else. So really understanding your ownstrengths and weaknesses and not being afraid to
surround yourself with a really good teamand with people that are willing to help,
that are better served than than youare in some aspects. Yeah,

(30:04):
I love that. And and youknow, within every niche there's there's always
as kind of a struggle as likehow do you separate yourself from the rest?
So how do you align yourself withthe people who are looking specifically the
unique offering that you have? Whatwould you say is your unique? What
makes you your offering unique? Whenit comes to this UM yoga niche still

(30:26):
in this zen you know UM space. UM, I think I show up
to be both um you know,both zen and also struggling as a mother
and can show up authentically in thatway. UM. I think historically there's
a lot of yogis that seem veryout of touch and not reachable because it's

(30:47):
a lifestyle that doesn't resonate um withwith the average person. You're not in
the mountains every single day, workingout of a cave and then coming out
and say the yoga for eight hours, right, And that's not realistic you
know, I'm a working mom,I have four kids, I have two
at home, and it's you know, the reality is m even in the

(31:07):
yoga sutras, we're householders. Weremeant to show up and live in the
earthly world, and we're not meantto go be I mean as much as
as lovely as it would be toyou know, do yoga for eight hours
a day and meditate, so I'mbeautiful to button you know, landscape.
I still have to come in andclean the house and deal with my kids
and do homework and all the otherthings that come along with it. So

(31:29):
being able to show up in anauthentic voice, I think people resonate with
that yoga as a lifestyle doesn't haveto be unattainable, that it can be
approachable for a lot of just regularpeople that you know, we really just
want to be happy. Um.We want to be happy in our our
lives and our relationships with our familyand our careers, and yoga is a

(31:52):
path to happiness, and I wantto make it accessible to all and saying
hey, if I can do thisas a overachieving, recovering perfectionists who had
eating disorders and you know, arein all these things and struggles in our
marriage, and I can kind ofcome out on the other side and continue
to be on the path. Andyou know a lot of people can do
that. It's accessible and there ishappiness and joy in life. You just

(32:14):
have to show up and be presentfor it. Yeah, I know.
It's so funny. I notice thatyou said two bonus kids. Right,
it's not even that I'm not quitesure what that means. I have one
and that's that's good enough for me. But I mean the two bonus Yeah,
okay, two steps Oh got it. It came with the Yeah,
they came. They came with camewith the marriage. So yeah, but

(32:36):
I claimed them as well, that'swhat that means. I wasn't sure.
I wasn't sure if you met,Like, oh wait, I just got
another one bonus. No, Ihave two stepsons that are twenty one in
nineteen, but I helped to raisethem. So yeah, my husband,
I've been gether for like eighteen years. So nice, beautiful. I love
that. Okay, super cool.And then two of your own between,
yes, two that I actually birthedmyself. Yeah, okay, so that

(32:59):
wasn't so bonus. That was like, I know it's coming yeah, I
know that very cool. So Ihave a question. So, okay,
so a lot of people will findthemselves and me included, like you get
to these points in your life asa journey as an entrepreneurship and we look
working to create a prosperous life wheresometimes things get really good and you're just

(33:21):
They're like, then this is whereI this is a good place to be
right and at some point and youknow what it's like as an entrepreneurs like,
do you really ever stop? Youknow, do you really ever stop
looking to what's next? So myquestion for you is is there a next
and if so, what is thatnext big leap that is like the big
stretch so to speak from where youare right now in your business and in

(33:44):
your life. I mean, isit like vacations to the Tibetan temple with
the family so that you can forat least a week or so yoga every
day for eight hours or is itsomething more than that or on top of
that, and more importantly, whatis the next big on tes or what
are the challenges that you are recognizingnow that is actually keeping you from achieving

(34:05):
that next big step? So what'son the high riseon I'm really focusing on
the podcast and kind of getting thatand growing that brand, potentially a cookbook
on the horizon, which are funthings to continue to challenge my skills.
And yeah, in the kitchen,which which is a lot of fun.
And the ND tethering piece what Ihave to continue to work on would be

(34:30):
remembering that the money is important andshow up for that. And kind of
it's one of those where I mademoney early on and then didn't and then
made money later on, and soI've had this kind of up and down
situation with money, but recognize thatit does matter and that my time is
worth while and valuable. And that'sprobably the story that I have to keep

(34:50):
coming back to because as an entrepreneur, you want to say yes to everything.
You want to say yes to everyopportunity and every interview, in every
collaboration, and it's just not areasonable thing because again, if we go
back to what was prosperous is havingtime and space to show up to the
things that matter. And you can'tdo that if you don't start balancing your

(35:12):
wise. Yeah. Yeah, andand so before I forget, I want
to ask so remind me. Iwant to talk about that chef piece that's
in there because it's it's not reallyit's then part of the nourishment process,
right, I mean, I'm sureyou take your clients through that. Tell
me more about that whole chef piece. Was that something that just because your
own personal passion or did you actuallygrowing up you you did some work as

(35:37):
a chef or what? Tell memore about that. Yeah. Sorry,
I grew up in a family offoodies, and I always love food.
And it was interesting because I talkedbriefly about having an eating disorder in my
late teens and early twenties and sotaking a very unhealthy relationship with food and
having to turn that into a healthyrelationship with food or a beneficial relationship trip

(36:00):
of food was a really important partof my growing up and evolving as a
young woman, so much so thatI went to culinary school just from the
passion of food and not knowing ifI was ever going to work in a
restaurant or what I was going todo with it, but new I'd always
been passionate about food and wanted tohave that skill set. I totally get

(36:22):
where you're coming from, because there'san element of certain human beings that when
we're in that space of being ableto access downloads and being able to talk
to people. This is a partof some of the work that I do
around human assessment and stuff like that, that it lends to that ephemeral moment
where you're like in the flow andsuddenly something will interrupt it and then all
of a sudden it's gone. Butthat's kind of part of our access to

(36:43):
like source, right, It's likethings are flowing through, flowing fast,
and all of a sudden it's like, wait, what was I And that's
usually what happens. And that tellsme that the way you have been able
to kind of come up with theseideas and the ways to pivot in a
most effective way, that agility comesfrom that ephemeral flow that sometimes if it's

(37:05):
just slight interruption and it's like wow, okay yeah, and then and then
losing it, yeah, because it'svery it's it's it's very it's not I
wouldn't say fragile, but it's verylight. In order for that flow to
happen to source, it's not likeit's not like gravity, it's like not
as grounded. And that's why it'simportant to ground after you connect you leave

(37:28):
the body, come back, leavethe body, come back. So you
kind of have access to source likeand that's why sometimes when we're talking and
not everybody has that, and that'sthat's the beautiful thing. So you know,
as people say like, oh mygod, you seem so like,
you know, unfocused, actually that'snot it. I think it's because we
have to go there to access thatbrilliance, the light, the ideas,

(37:49):
this, you know, the downloadsif you will, And so that's I
love that way of looking at itfor sure. Well, I mean in
the work that I did, wesee it all the time. You know,
I haven't to me too. That'swhy I never without like a moleskin
or a notepad or some way tocapture what comes through for sure. For
sure, Like when I'm interviewing,it's definitely like I have a whole show,
Alan, if I don't you justyou didn't get lost, Hello,

(38:13):
goodbye. That's why I have thosecore questions. Yeah, I always have
a notepad in the shower too,so like when something comes through, I'm
like writing in this, it's literallyon my wall in the showers, Like
okay, I gotta right. Ilove that. Yeah, Yeah, it's
like a waterproof now you don't wantto miss the moments. Brilliant. Yeah,
I come through exactly. And soI think what was flowing just now
is well we were talking about,you know, the whole chef thing and

(38:34):
how that came into your world,how you decided because I said, is
that something because you grew up ina house full of foodies, right,
which is great? And then it'sinteresting through the eating this order, you
didn't run away from it. Youembraced it to what creating to be a
home chef for Was it a businessor is this part of your business?

(38:54):
Sir? I guess recipe curation aspart of the business and coming up with
healthy rest to piece that I sharewith you know, my zen mommy community
and the group. But food isan interesting thing because you have to have
a relationship with food, and likedrugs and alcohol and an eating disorder is
a really interesting thing where it kindof falls along that line of addiction.

(39:15):
It kind of falls in some familiaremotional and mental patterns of addiction. We
all have to eat. And soyou can't just say or I'm never going
to drink again. You know,you can't say that about food. And
so coming up with a healthy relationshipis a hard thing. I would say,
people have some kind of disordered eating, whether it's the chatter that goes

(39:37):
on, you know, or thewhen we shy away from certain foods.
I mean, there's all kinds offunny disordered eating patterns, But really how
we nourish our body and educating peopleabout whole foods is a super passion of
mine, just because it matters somuch in the energy the output that we

(40:00):
have. And for someone that haddepleted energy and had an eating disorder and
used food as this kind of manipulativetool in my life, and then to
twist that and make it something beautifulwith really important to me, and also
to show that to my children.Yeah, And I think what I love
about this part is I think alot of people who are listening to some

(40:21):
of dealing with their own fears andtheir own challenges. Instead of running away
from creating a polarization, which iswhat a lot of people will do,
right, they'll just say I don'twant it, to say I just want
to ignore that. I'll I'll justkeep it out of my life. You
fully embrace this, like you steppedup to the line and realize you can
make it, tame it into akitten, and you became a home chef.
I mean, that's what it soundslike you did. Yeah, I

(40:44):
leaned into it. I went toculinary school. I turned something that I
was passionate route that was obsessive.It kind of reframed those thoughts. And
now I get to think about foodall the time, but in a fun
way because I'm always creating new recipesand trying out things at home and challenging
skills in the kitchen. So toreframe those thoughts that were really negative and

(41:06):
impactful, that to change that andchannel that energy into something good and creative.
Food has become my creative outlet.I can't sing, I cannot dance,
but food is definitely the way thatI show love and give love to
others. And so to be ableto share that with the world and with
other moms, and you know,how we feed our children is so important
to setting them up for a lifestyleof healthy choices. Yeah, and there's

(41:30):
so many different ways of creating beautyand art in this world. I mean,
I'm sure you so what if youdon't sing or dance, but you
can probably plate the heck out ofyour favorite foods and make it look amazing.
One of my favorite things to seewhen I was in restaurant business that
as a GM, I would alwaysgo into the say, chef, make
me something beautiful and make sure it'splated, like I'm your best client,

(41:53):
right, and it's it's super cool, it's amazing. It's it's so pretty.
And the things that we can do. I mean, I just went
to a nice dinner last night andwe were there after our our event and
it was interesting because they said,wait, did you know we can eat
the garnish. I'm like, yes, this is why I took you guys
here, because everything that's playd hereyou can consume. And it was rude

(42:15):
when we eat with our eyes first, right, So it matters what our
food looks like when it's come out. And I always say that to other
moms because they're usually taxed with,you know, having to make food for
the family and they don't like cooking. You know, they don't feel good
about it, and people don't enjoytheir food. I mean, when someone
doesn't like cooking, you can tasteit in their food. Yeah, yeah,
right, you can taste the hateand bitterness and their food that comes

(42:38):
across and when someone's really joyful inthe kitchen and it's really passionate and loves
it and puts their heart and soulinto it. You know, you see
it, you feel it, andyou taste it. Yeah, it's like
is this a Is this a bitterchocolate? No, it's milk chocolate.
What happened to it? Are you? Do you want to talk about something?
Is there something that you're going on? Do you want to get off

(42:58):
your chest right now? Do youincorporate this in your work with your clients?
Do you have them actually, youknow, learn some of the culling
ary skills that you've been developing overas part of their journey of becoming more
fulfilled mothers and moms that slow downand enjoy what it means to kind of
provide for their children and for theirhusbands. And when I offered the nourishment

(43:22):
piece on the app, I reallystarted with all of these baseline technique videos
and teaching other moms and women.How do you hold your knife? How
do you grow food? How doyou do yeah? How do you you
know? What? What kind ofsalts do you use on your food?
Because salt isn't a flavor enhancer.And so starting with these very baseline skills,

(43:44):
so that again like building confidence ina yoga in your yoga practice at
home using an app so that yougo into a yoga studio, it's building
your little chef skills in the kitchenso that you feel more confident pulling recipes.
I mean recipes come by the youknow, millions and billions on the
internet, but everybody's they lack confidenceto tackle something new. And so if

(44:05):
you feel confident in something, themore likely that you will enjoy it,
and people will taste that in yourfood. And so if you have some
confidence and some skill in the kitchen, that'll show your family will notice.
You're the people that your food willnotice. You'll notice, and you'll be
more inclined to make food for yourselfso that you can nourish your own body.
Yeah, and it's so important.I don't think people realize just how

(44:27):
much of your own personal energy goesinto the food that you create. And
you're right. People can tell,especially food eas you know, and if
they are not food ease, theywill they will unconsciously notice a difference and
the challenges if they don't really thatthey're unconsciously noticing, they'll just won't feel
good and they don't know why,or they'll feel off and they don't know

(44:47):
why. And it's all through thefood and the energy that went into the
food, which is interesting. It'sa whole separate conversation, but yeah,
well, and food is such aninteresting thing. It's what a lot of
Western medicine doesn't look but it's itcan be our greatest healer or our biggest
curse. And so when people comeand they're they're feeling depressed or anxious or
tight, or they have pain,you know, that is one of the

(45:09):
things that we look at. Howare you feeding your body? What are
you eating? Because that translates intoall aspects of how you feel and how
you know pain in your body,and can we start to make little tweaks
in your diet so that you getmore fresh foods and fruits and vegetables and
uh, you know, and allof that will translate into feeling more joyful
and more present in your life,right right, So very cool. I'm

(45:32):
glad I was able to kind ofopen up that because I realized it was
probably a big part of what itis that you do and the fact that
you went to culinary school too.I didn't. I was like, okay,
what else. So I know youmentioned going back to the whole the
big untethering, and it sounds likeit's a money story that's there that a
lot of people who go into thisspace. And it's interesting because I see

(45:52):
this a lot where those that havebecome that become financially accomplished early on in
life start to swing almost doing alittle bit too hard in the opposite direction.
So, no, I don't needmine, and there's the money thing.
Was like, it's the culprit,right, And so it sounds like
that you are recognizing that there's thatthe next big thing is recognizing the importance

(46:12):
of you know, having that moneyflow for helping your business elevate to that
next step. Right, What doyou think is that that dialogue that's happening
that is contributing to money, theno money, the money, the no
money, that kind of like ayo yo roller coaster effect. Well,
it's interesting. Money was. Igrew up with a single mom, so

(46:34):
we were very poor, but mydad was really wealthy, and so I
would visit money on the weekend andthen I would go back and live a
life where oh wow, yeah,so we we and she was a single
mom of three and we were onfood stamps and there was, you know,
the whole thing. And then Iwould literally my dad would pick me
up from elementary school in a ferrariand it was such a weird dichotomy to
grow up and experience both. SoI think that contributed into a money story.

(47:00):
And then I love what you saidabout being successful early on when you
had money, you know, comeeasily, and you made a lot of
money and you were successful, thenit was like, okay, well that's
not important anymore. Or I connectthat period of time of being really successful
in making money with some of theother mental afflictions and things that were going
on, and so trying to disassociatethe financial piece from the mental piece and

(47:25):
so that you can bring a moresuccessful money story into the foreground. And
it's a lot of people that arein a mentorship or coaching or a wellness
base where they're helping others. It'slike that's primary and finances, you know,
come somewhere down the line and itcan be just as important as the
work that you were called to do. And you know, I think that's

(47:50):
what's going to give you long termpotential, long terms yet sustainability. You
know, you can only offer yourservices under valued for so long and eventually
you'll get burned out. Yeah.Absolutely, So I love that you're that
you're that you're recognizing that. AndI think for a lot of people who
are even those that are six figuresor seven figures and wanting to go to

(48:13):
a figures, there's still a littlebit some of those money stories that kick
up that normally wouldn't kick up atthe earlier parts of that journey. So
it's interesting. It's like it's anever ending thing almost. Yeah, it's
a constant evaluation and growth, andyou know, as an entrepreneur, ready
to pivot and continuing to look atwhat you're being complacent in or challenging your

(48:35):
own stories and things that you're carryingwith you. And if you have a
certain money story, is really sittingback and saying why where did that come
from? And start to kind ofsit with those and let go of the
things that aren't serving you anymore.Awesome. Yeah, it reminds me of
a few few field tools and stufflike that. I should probably just share
some with you so you can getthat handled. You know, those little
tools that have anyway. But anyway, okay, very cool. Well,

(48:59):
you know what, I knew thiswas going to happen, just hearing a
little bit about what you were allabout. And next next thing, you
know, I was like, ohwait, we went past the timeline.
But that's okay. I mean,there was so such there are so many
amazing gemstums of what you dropped therein terms of just your own journey and
you know, incorporating all the differentaspects of your own personal just to say

(49:21):
journey again, but your own personalpath and dealing with the challenges you've had,
and then incorporating that into helping others. It's almost like paying it forward
after you yourself at you know,kind of like dealt with it in your
life. Right. So if someonelistening to this, especially moms or even
zen daddies, you know, andthey're saying, God, I really like
what she's all about. I likethe vibe, I like the kind of

(49:43):
the energy. If you will,what would be the best way that they
can connect with you to maybe talkto you or even experience what it is,
or maybe just get the app?I mean, what is the best
way. Yeah. The apps availableon Apple, Google Play, it's a
free download. There's lots of freecontent, including meditation in the beginning yogur
series, and they can reach outto me right in the community wall or

(50:04):
on my website, the zenmommy dotcom, or at Instagram at the Underscore
Zen Underscore Mommy. They can alwaysreach out with the DM and any questions
they have, whether they're yoga,food related, or life related, I'd
love to hear from them, orreal estate related, whatever, real estate
related or all kinds. Oh yeah, buy, you're exactly yeah, having

(50:25):
four kids two bonus kids and what'sthat about? You know all that stuff
anyway, So yeah, very approachable. Jessica is easy to talk to,
as you can probably tell if youhaven't help, I don't know what you're
listening to, but super easy.Um, but again, I appreciate so
much. If you want to havethe contact or reach out to Jessica,
all the links are in the descriptionbelow of this podcast, and so that

(50:46):
way you don't have to go Googleif you want to, you can,
but you know, she's really easyto find anyway. So again, Jessica,
thank you so much for taking thetime. Really appreciate the wisdom and
knowledge that you dropped and the authenticityand the willingness to kind of share you
know that despite being as successful asyou are and having the path that you've
created in life already, that youare still very human and there's still things

(51:10):
that you want to do up andbeyond because sooner or later, those kids,
like you said, two are probablyoff in the world already and there's
two more and what's they're gone.It's like, I don't think you're just
going to keep being a mom.You're probably going to be doing bigger and
bigger, better things. Right,Yeah, I love it, Right,
what's for you at the end ofthe day. We have to start remembering
that, especially as moms exactly.There's so many tweetables in this episode,

(51:34):
so I'm have to go back andsee what they are. But anyway,
thank you so much, really appreciateyou. If you want to connect with
Jessica, check out the links belowand then get her to help you slow
down and be still and that wayyou can untether yourself from what's holding you
back. Thanks Jessica, Thank youso much for having me. And that's

(51:58):
it for this episode. Thank youfor listening, because you listening is what
inspires our guests and me to continuedoing what we can to help untether and
elevate more human beings to new heightsof prosperous success. Now, if what
you heard today inspired you to wantto finally untether from the bad money stories
or chronic self sabotage behavior patterns that'sbeen holding you back, then you'll want

(52:22):
to join our exclusive, members onlyprivate podcasts that dive deeper into the topics
discussed here, along with more actionablestrategies, tips, and trainings. Just
click on the link in the descriptionof this episode to find out more.
Until next time,

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Episode 44 - “Show Up and Be Present” with Jessica Gershman

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Episode 44 - “Show Up and Be Present” with Jessica Gershman