August 15, 2025 • 47 mins
She’s a visionary leader and advocate for transforming how we think about health, leadership, and purpose. In this inspiring episode of Vault Empowers Talks, Dr. Lori Hanford sits down with Brandi Harvey to share her journey of breaking barriers, embracing authenticity, and leading with heart.From navigating challenges to creating lasting impact, Dr. Hanford’s story is a masterclass in resilience and intentional living. If you’ve ever wondered how to align your calling with real-world influence—this conversation will give you the blueprint.
You can watch the full interview here: https://youtu.be/M06Zkmf0Ja4
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You can watch the full interview here: https://youtu.be/M06Zkmf0Ja4
Follow us on social media for more inspiring stories ⬇️
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vaultempowers
X: https://twitter.com/vaultempowers
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vaultempowers
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@vaultempowers
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/
Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/vaultempowers
Stay connected with Brandi Harvey ⬇️
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iambrandiharvey/
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/vault-empowers-talks--5932708/support.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You've been here and you told me, Brandy, it's my dream.
I put on my vision board. I'm going to sit
in this seat. This diagnosis of being neurodiversion, it came
later in life. Fifty five is when you said I'm
gonna go out here and live my dreams.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I'm always in control and there's never a safe space
for me to just be feminine.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
If you want me to be feminine, to give me.
It's like men always say I wantn't peace, but then
you raise hell.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Because I think so many times at my age we
get sent our way. Well, that's just the way I am.
But if the way that I am is not working
for me, then some adjustments need to be mere.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Welcome to bought Empower's talks. For we don't just scratch
the surface. We dive deep into the lives of some
of the world's most influential change makers. I'm your host,
Brandy Harvey. Y'all, I got the rich aunte in the
building today. Doctor Lorie Hanford, affectionately known as rich I'm
She's an award winning educator, red carpet correspondent, and storyteller
(01:05):
who shows a bowlly in every room she enters. With
more than twenty years in education, doctor Hanford has been
a lifeline for at risk youth, helping them rise with
the belief that their story isn't over, It's just getting started.
She's been named Students Support Specialists of the Year for
both her school and the entire Decab County School District,
and honored with a I Am a Difference Maker Award
(01:27):
for her relentless impact. Outside of the classroom. She shines
in front of the camera as a lead correspondent for
Ato Plus magazine and has gray shows like The Mel
Robbins Show, The Portia Show, and a star on the
Netflix hit The Later Daters. She holds a Presidential Lifetime
Achievement Award in an honorary Doctorate in Humanities. Whether mentoring
(01:48):
with the Stephen Marjorie Harvey Foundation or repping Delta Sigma Theta,
Laurie's life is proof that when service is your calling,
the spotlight will find you. Vaught Inpower Talk's Welcome Mother
Philanthropists and meet the amazing doctor Lorii Hanford to the show.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
It was the intro for me.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Clock it, Laurie. It's a pleasure.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
I'm going to cry.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Why are you gonna? Yeah? She's been saying this since
she walked in here. We have to go ahead and
tell this.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Laurie.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I have known you since your son came to the
mentoring program. Your son, Sean came to the mentoring program
in twenty seventeen, into the Steve Harvey Mentoring program. That
was when we first met, and then you have just
remained a constant. I don't It's like, Laurie, I can't
escape you. I go to church, there's Laurie. I go
(02:44):
to an event, I see Laurie. I go to the
mentoring program, Laurie is there.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Now I'm going to mentor That's one thing I'm gonna
do that Stephen Marjorie Harvey Foundation has literally changed my life.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
It saved my life to save Sean's life. So you're
always going to see me there.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Well, yeah, I'm so excited. I mean, I feel like
I've gotten to know you. And then even when we
started to show you, you dubbed yourself the official greeter
of Bought empower Tae. Y'all don't know she's been behind
the scenes.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
I've been in the studio audience. She's been in the
studio audience.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Listen, you've been here and you told me, Brandy, it's
my dream. I put on my vision board. I'm going
to sit in the seat of question. I did. Here
you are.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Because I used to take notes when you were like interviewing.
I mean when you were doing the interviews. I would
just sit there and take notes. And I said, I'm
just sitting in that chair. One day I did I
bought it too or too write the vision down and
make a plane.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Yeah, and you have written the vision. You've made a plane.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
And I'm right here and you were here and.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
We ran into each other at the mentoring program and
I said, well, I got to opening.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
Right cause I wanted you to do an introduction.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
Remember, I said, Brindy, can you just do an introduction
from my Instagram?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Yeah? She had me do the intro on the spot
outside ninety degrees.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
I'm sitting on the fishy ponds.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Yeah, sitting at the pond, on a on a on
a on a little truck. And you're like, can you
do an intro? Put the camera up on the spot.
So I did my best.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
It was good this tea. I'll you're like, I'm all that,
Oh my god, Yeah, it's here.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
I mean, you've had quite the career. You are a
media maven. Everybody in Atlanta. If you are in in
or around Atlanta in any event, you're gonna see Lori.
You're gonna see the gray hair and the glasses. Oh
and see they're off today and you didn't wear them today,
right because you recently were on the show Later Daters
(04:40):
on Netflix.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Yes, yeah, and the glasses were uh a what it
was a hot topic.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Girl.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I got dragged on TikTok and stuff about the glasses.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I really can't even believe that. Yes, but maybe because
it's been such a such a signature look for you
since I've known you.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
And I can't see it's so that's what you can understand.
And then the glasses were expensive. So I'm going aware of.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Them and I like them, but I want to do
something different, you know, Richalte Laurie is cool, but I'm
still Lori, you know what I mean. And La Terra
said something that was very powerful when I did the
Dear Future wifey. He said, did you ever ask men
what they like? People need to see your eyes, they
need to see your faith. People want to engage with Lorii,
you know, And sometimes the glasses could be a hindrance.
(05:28):
Now I heard that on the show. But it's how
you talk to me. It's how you speak to me,
you know, And if I have a relationship with you,
I'm more apt to adapt, you.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Because the dating coach on the show Later Daters. And
if our audience isn't familiar, you can go check this out.
It was in the top ten on Netflix for quite
a few weeks on Netflix. And this is a show
about people who are seasoned and they are still looking
for love. Yes, yeah, still looking for love. So she says,
(06:02):
she's a whole vibe y'all.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Oh, I am Pramo Machiato.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yes, you're Camra Machiato, Cara Machado.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Okay, why why that the expresso the punch? Right? You
got the punch because I'm a little feisty.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Uh huh.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
You have the caramel, which is really softest move if
you if I trust you and let you in, you
get the really soft Lori. Then you have the whipped cream.
I'm really fun, I'm really lively. Yes, and then you
stirred all together, you get loris vibe.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
I mean, let's talk about the Later Daters, because when
we watched the show which I told you. I remember
when you sent it to me and said, hey, I
got this show that just coming out. I want you
to watch it. And it took me a few weeks,
so like, let me finally sit down and worn like
and just binge it. And when I sat down and
watched it, I really enjoyed it. And then I knew
(06:52):
people on it because I knew miss Denise because I
was friends with her daughter. Oh yeah, I was friends
with Duenna. Yeah. Yeah, So when I saw you and
I'm like, they go to church together, y'all.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And I never seen an these before. I mean, I
never knew that was her. We went to church every day.
We never knew that we were feel me.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
And I thought that you all knew each other from
new birth.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
No, and then actually I was going to put Jamal
in it. Jamal was going to actually.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Be it and he didn't need to be right, No,
he was going to.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Be a part of it.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
And then it's like the timing was always off, Okay,
So I was like, but then Jamal is gonna take
the show, right. So what happened is they took things
from the Red Carpet and inserted him in.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
Yeah, I did the Red carpet.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
So what did that show teach you? Because I mean,
we looked at so many different facets of women and
men who are still looking for love. But you caught
a lot of back backlash because people thought you were
being a little too picky. Some comments were like, you're
a little too masculine.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
We did that all the time.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Yeah, and yes, a lot of people say I'm masculine
because I'm like, and this is what I was telling
the dating coach. I have to be in control of everything.
I was a mom raising my kids. I was doing that,
so I gotta control that. Then I'm a behavior coach, right.
My specialty is at risk young boys, black boys, and crisis.
That's what I'm specialized in. So I gotta be in
(08:14):
control of that. Then when I go to a red carpet.
You know how celebrities are, not.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
All of them, some of them. I have to manage
a carpet.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
I'm always in control, and there's never a safe space
for me to just be feminine.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
If you want me to be feminine, to give me.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
It's like men always say I want peace, but then
you raise hell. I can't be peace in hell. You
see what I'm saying, I don't know where my sayings
be coming from, but give me a soft space.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
And I never have time to have that soft space.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
So yeah, I did get all the masculine comments, but
I think once you get to know me, I'm really
not that way. I'm just I have to learn how
to let go of control.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Yeah, I mean I notice it, And I think I
was able to watch it with a different vantage point
and leans only because I knew that you were a
single mother. I knew that you'd experience some you know,
really deep heartbreak and loss and grieving in relationship, and
so I knew that you were walking into that with
that that's a part of the story. Yes, right, So
(09:12):
I was able to see that. But even when I
talked to a friend recently and said you were coming
on the show and she was like, she was very
masculine on the show, was like really, I was like,
I said, you know, I said, I think she comes
across She probably came across maskling because she's never had
the opportunity to be soft, thank you. And so then
when I go and I'm prepping for you and I'm
(09:33):
watching you on the terrace, and then I'm like that
was it, like she she's never had the reason. Nobody's
in ever, no one's ever given you the permission to
let your guard down.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
You got it, and thank you, thank you for defending me,
because like I said, you know that show it even
meant like when they have that liquid courage, they'd be like, y'all,
you just be knocking the men down.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
You just be doing that. Why is it? Because I
speak my truth? You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I have to be masculine. You know, I am very
a type a personality. I'm very matter of fact. I'm
very in your face type of person you know what
I mean. Because I think for so long I had
I was the shy little girl. I was the bullyed
little girl. And now this little ten year old version
of me, nobody's ever going to mess with me or
(10:20):
play with me again. So I'm still trying to heal
that ten year old little girl that and let her
know that she's saved. Everybody's not coming for you, you
know what I mean. And I think so many times
people don't heal the childhood trauma and it shows up
in different ways.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
I mean, you talked about a liqual courage because you
said that's a red flat for you as men men
who drink, you know, and they have if they're drinking
alcohol excessively because you had an alcoholic father and you
grew up with that. But you, I mean, one of
the things that I learned about you was so many things.
I feel like that layer into how you probably are
(10:57):
showing up in this season of your life. Yes, mother
died at eleven, yep, father died at twenty five, and
then you were dealing with molestation from a woman. All
of this is happening at ten, eleven, twelve.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Yeah, and then you have to think all of my
aunt and uncles on both sides are deceased, so there's
no family, right, So I don't have a grandmother or grandfather.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
I don't have aunt and uncles. They're all deceased, my mom,
my dad, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
So that's a lot to uncover. So I bury a
lot of it. And that was the first time on
the Terra's podcast that I ever talked about being molested
by a woman, because back then I didn't know that
was molestation, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Who am I telling? I mean, I didn't know. So yeah,
so there's so many different layers so masculine.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
If that's how you feel, I mean, I'll take it.
I mean, because I know who I am. But I'm
working on softening up LOORI because I want to show
up as a different person.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
You know.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
They always say if something's not working for you, you
can't just be like that's how I am.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
No.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
I mean, if there's rule for improvement, then I'm going
to improve.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Yeah. So yeah, but you said the trick at this
age is that most people are stuck in their ways.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Yes, they're stuck in their ways. Yeah, and I don't
want to be stuck.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah, you'll please, no vacline oil, whatever you need me do.
Let me just try to ease my weight on out
of here.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Yeah. So how are you working to show up differently
in this season? And I mean I think sometimes you
you're having to kind of jump the hurdle of what
people saw of you on the show.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
Yeah, especially different with men. Well one therapy. I go
to therapy and I have a really good trauma therapy.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Oh that's so good.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
Yeah she is bad? Oh my god, could she be
like You're just wrong?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I mean, how's that working for you?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
LORI?
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Like, I like, yeah, like my little feelings be hurt.
She really does worth it though, So that's my best.
You know how people go by purses and all that
other stuff. Mine just trying to help myself. Another thing
is a lot of men always say, Lourie, you know
we would.
Speaker 3 (13:09):
I got some friends, but they just like you be
outside too much. I'm working. It ain't like I'm at
a hookah bar, you know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
What I mean.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Like, it ain't like I'm at a club.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
I am literally working. You know, too many people or
you post too many men. It's the business that I'm in.
So I like on this show, I qualified. Are you
okay being around a lot of people? I mean, I
don't consider myself a celebrity, but I guess everybody else does,
because I mean.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
You're the Lord, You're a celebrity.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
No, said Airport.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
I was at good Will yesterday and I get stopped.
I got a T shirt from good Will and says,
you don't know me. I'm going to wear it every day.
And they be like, oh, I went to go Sean
got a hit and run accident, right, I had to
go get the records thing.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
I'm at the police department. Oh my god, Oh my god,
it's you.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
I'm just trying to get a record and I take
a picture. Oh my god, did you end up with fell?
So it's like everywhere I go and I don't see
myself like that, you know. So that's a problem for
a lot of men. So I need to find somebody.
If I was a man, I would definitely date me
because I would be in those rooms. I would be networking,
my business, doing everything. But it's you, like La Terra said,
(14:19):
it was going to take a pretty confident man to
on the spaces stuff.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
I mean for sure, because you have a lot of
male friends, now, y'all, don't you dad?
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Y'all?
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Lauri stayed with a fine best friend. Okay, she she
had the mentor in camp. I said, well who was that?
She said, oh, that's my best friend. I said, that's
your best friend, your best male friend. Looked like that.
You ain't never? She said, never, Brandy, I've never. And
I said, I said, I loved that for you. That
wouldn't have been my story because she's one.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Of my closest friends. And you know what, I like
the fact. And that's when I said I could cut
the pace him. He's studies me. Like we were having
a conversation meet him and Sean, and he was like,
what people don't know about your mom is once she
feels safe, she opens up and a lot of men
don't know that about me.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
He was like, and she's one of the sweetest people
you will ever know.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
She would do anything for you, because see he looked
past all that hard stuff, you know what I mean,
and he sees LORI, but I have to be safe
around you, especially where I am now. I don't know
if you like me because of my connection. Can you
introduce me to Jamal?
Speaker 3 (15:29):
Can I hear?
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Can you tell mister Harvey I want to come to
the camp or you know, it's like I get a
lot of that. And once you start asking me about people,
you don't want me for me. You want me for
the people that I'm connected to or the spaces that
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I mean, let's talk about, you know, some of these
spaces that you are in and how that's going to
help you kind of accelerate this look for love in
your life. Because one of the things that you've been
very vocal about is talking about you want to find love.
You want to be the answer prayer.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
You forgot this that part what is that I pray
for you did that?
Speaker 1 (16:10):
So you okay? You want all that answer?
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:13):
I do want to be an answer to a man's
answer to a man's prayer. And so how are you
working to be the answer to a man's prayer? What
prayer do you want to answer?
Speaker 3 (16:23):
You know?
Speaker 2 (16:24):
And that's why what men I always literisaid, if you
want to know what a man is thinking, ask the man.
So I asked, like my guy friends like, so what
do you what is this?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
What is that?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
You know?
Speaker 3 (16:33):
What I mean? How do I show up? Is the
main thing that men said are.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
The glasses, Laurie, Like you have pretty eyes, we can't
see them.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
You know.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Most men have said they don't want to date you
because of the glasses.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
No, no, they're saying that. I'm asking them, how how
can I improve?
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Like?
Speaker 3 (16:50):
Show up?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Bet?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
You know what, Laurie. You know, show your face more.
You know, I want to get to know your face.
Speaker 3 (16:56):
Men want to do it. Then, one of my guys,
I do have a lot of guy friends.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
I got do this. You have a lot of guy friends.
Speaker 4 (17:03):
I do.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Yeah, I'm not judging.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Nod I have. I have a lot, But I want
to get out the friend zone. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
But I don't know there's any of them that I
want to date. But I love the fact that they
pour into me. So I want to show up. I
want to show up a softer.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
I'm trying to work on my feminine side, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
But then, so are you taking some sort of classes,
you have some sort of coach? Are you doing things
that like improve being more subductive? What are you working on? Well?
Speaker 3 (17:31):
See, I wore this today.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Okay, okay, okay, okay. I love that it's given a
little a little bit little peokable.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
It's a little and I see I have great legs.
But I don't know if I can come in here
in short so you could wear whatever you want it here,
I could have show the legs.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
But I want to shout out to Stacy J. I
need to get with Stacy J for real.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
But I want to learn how to be a little
I've never seen it before, you know what I mean.
I never seen it because you remember, I didn't have
the mom and you know it was all of that.
So I wanted to learn how to walk in my
feminine way, you know what I mean? Yeah, just be
more kind and one thing that we talked about on
the show that didn't get to the show is I'm neurodivergent.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
So once you've written a whole book finding Love, Finding
Me a neuro Virgin's journey to finding love.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yes, so I have ADHD. So I might interrupt you,
I might overtalk you. You see what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
My dopamine level gets low, so I might.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
You might think I'm combat of men, say word, you're
combat of No, I'm passionate.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Why do I have to be compative?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Why can I just not be passionate about what I'm
talking about. I'm highly intelligent. That's what people understand. So
if you're going to talk about global affairs, I'm here
with you. If you want to talk about this, I
can go to the Mayor's Ball with Andre Dickens, or
I can go to the mentoring camp.
Speaker 3 (18:46):
Either way, I'm going to be able to relate on
all levels.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
So I need someone who can navigate those spaces with
me and understand.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
How my brain is wired.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
I might be looking at you, but then I have
a scroll brain and I'm over here looking at hand
and I'm doing this.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
But I heard everything that you said. Yeah, so that
all those things.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
This this diagnosis of being neurodiversion. It came later in life.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Yes, yes, because I was like, something is wrong with me,
Like I'm just.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
It was the combativeness.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
It's like you know, and now that I started getting
more into ADHD, it's a dopamine thing, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
I need the rush.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
So if I'm over talking people and I was always
talking too much, now I get paid to talk.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Remember I was talking about that. Yeah, because it was like.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
I'm always my brain is processing. And then this is
what I love about my job. I wish I had
me at school when I was coming up. When my
babies question anything like say go sit down, Well, why
do I have to sit down? What am I doing?
That's not a sign of disrespect, It's a side of
my brain is processing.
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Why is that best for me?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
And so when people look at as combativeness, I'm looking
as processing.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Yeah, you know I need to know why.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
So when you think back over your marriage because you
were divorced, but well, nobody's ever done that to me.
When you look back at your at your marriage, because
you all went through a pretty tough divorce, tumultuous. I
was gonna use the word tumultuous, but I didn't know
(20:21):
if we can say that it was a very tumultuous divorce.
And so when you look back, was that neual divergent
behavior showing up in the marriage and you were unaware?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
I was unaware?
Speaker 2 (20:36):
Yes, So sometimes we can blame people, then you have
to go back and do insight.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Yeah, what I mean.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
So it's like, wow, I wouldn't And I'm going to
say this part because I normally don't talk.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I don't give people energy.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
But I know when we went to counseling, you and
your ex husband, yes, me and my ex husband, yes,
your husband my husband. Pors told me that when a
Porsche showed she said, loriie their husbands.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
When I was going.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Through counseling and they diagnosed me, they was like, your
wife has this, this and this, and by that time
he was already checked out, you know. And it's like,
but why would you leave somebody because their brain is different?
Speaker 3 (21:16):
You see what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
That's just like if you have cancer or if you
have leukemia, do you leave people when they're broken?
Speaker 1 (21:23):
You said, Well, the studies are showing and a lot
of research is coming out about the fact that a
lot of men leave women when they become ill or
sick or say they've been diagnosed with cancer. You know,
sometimes men don't.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Have the wiring y yes, the capacity. And so I
even see it showed up as Sean and I love
how Sean and Kennedy, both of my kids showed up
in that show.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
That was hilarious.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
They were definitely like your little watch dogs, protectors. But
also that is they held you accountable and that.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
They do that all the time.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
And so from a male's point of view, you always
have to ask Sean, Sean be like mom, and then he'll.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Say, hey, Lorii, you know what I mean, or my
daughter'll be.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Like stop, Okay, let's stop, or you know what I
mean boundaries, So they really hold me accountable. When my
brain is overprocessing, they'll take me back to writing.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Yeah. So when you look at right now, in the
space that you're in, how are you able to manage
love on the spectrum?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
It has been working, it hasn't been working. This is
really I'm going to just put this out there. Like me,
I'm hyper focused, right, I can only really deal with
one person at the time. But if you start ghosting
and if you're like we're talking every day, and my
dopamine is up, and you missed two or three days,
I forgot that you ever existed.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
So if a man does not call you in two
days and y'all have been talking consistently, he's done.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
No, he's not done you because see, life happens. I
got five hundred and ninety two text messages. I might
not even respond to you, like you know what I mean? Yeah,
But it's just like, you know, my brain, since I'm
hyper focused, if I haven't talked to you in a
couple of days, you probably went down my little priority list, Okay,
and then if you call me, I'm probably be like,
who is this?
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I mean?
Speaker 1 (23:08):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Yes, my brain has processed out, so no, I mean,
and I think that's what we were talking about. Everything.
People have life going on. When you meet somebody, they're
not gonna stop their whole life for you. I can't
stop my whole life from you. Hey what are you doing?
I'm on a carpet, Hey, what are you doing? I'm
interviewed with Brandy. I mean, my life is like really everywhere,
(23:29):
but I'll prioritize who I need to prioritize.
Speaker 1 (23:32):
Yeah, how are you prioritizing you in this season? Because
I watched you when you were on the Mail Robbins episode,
which was like five years ago, season one of Mail Robbins, right,
the pre podcast. This was like talk show Mail Robbins,
and you were just a very different person. Like I
was like I was watching that. I was like, you
(23:54):
were so you had a different energy, you had a
different aura about yourself.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
What was that for you? What was the energy in
the aura? What was it?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
You seemed down?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
I was highly I was really young.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Yeah. I didn't want to diagnose you, but I was like,
she looked.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
I was dessed. I was yea, And see this is
the part where I go cry. I was defeated. I
was broken. That was the part. I was literally on welfare.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
I was trying to figure it out, like because I
had five years ago.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Yeah, almost about five years ago. Yeah about pre COVID.
That was almost pre COVID pre COVID.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Yeah no, no, no, no, no, let's take that back.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
I had had.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
I was awful welfare body then. But I was so
depressed because I was still trying to find my way,
find my life, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (24:41):
And it's like I had to.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
I have a best friend named Shaman and she's a sore.
She's my sands And she said, Laurie, you got to
stop being the victim. You are the victim of your
own story. And so then my therapist had told me,
they was like, if your brain is going to loop,
why not loop it.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
With positive affirmation?
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Because I was just like, you know what, I'm just
this that you know, I ain't got no job, and
I'm just this, and you know I need more money
and I.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Still need more money.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
But you know, if all of those things were gonna loop,
your brain is gonna loop, why don't you loop it
with positive things? And when I went back and looked
at that show, I said, I'd be dog oning. I
was so broken. And from that show, I started rebuilding
my life. I started changing the way I talk to myself. Laurie,
you're worthy, You're gonna do this. You have greatness inside
(25:28):
of you, You're going to be this.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
I started.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I like this right now is a manifestation of how
I talk to myself.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Yeah, yeah, I mean I could see it. I mean
you talked about on the show. It was other women
who had experienced divorce and a deep heart break and
you know, Mail was kind of helping you guys work
through this challenging med. Yeah, she was on you, she
was on me. You was trying to overtalk her too. Lord,
that was that was that was that you popping up.
(25:56):
I was like, Laurie, if you won't shut your ass
up on this show.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I'm trying to be like really present with you because
I'm working on not trying to interrupt people.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
So this is a whole process for me.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
You're doing great. Let me just tell you that you're
doing great, because I mean really, when I watched you,
I was like, it felt like you wanted to overcompensate
for whatever you were feeling in that moment, like let
me just say some you know, say something. And sometimes
we feel these spaces in our lives with meaningless words
or conversations, right, But I could tell that you were
(26:29):
not this version of you. I was like, God, you
just seem so much lighter, so much freer. I will
say this, you seem freer in this season.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I am yeah, because I just know God has something
amazing for me. And I'll be sixty in October. I know,
I know, I know I don't look sixty, but I
just know this is just the beginning for me. I
just know that there is something big coming with I
don't even know what it is, like, I don't know
what it is, but I know there is something major
(26:59):
that is about to happen, and I just have to
prepare for it and be ready.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I love that I do.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
I just I feel it.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
I mean, I want you to talk to the women
because you you said at fifty five, really at fifty five,
so this is that five years that we're talking about.
Fifty five is when you said, I'm going to go
out here and live my dreams. I'm going to do
the things that I want to do. And I think
that so many women who are listening to us right
now have found themselves in these spaces and places where
(27:31):
they feel like I'm too old, I'm divorced, my kids
are grown, I've somehow, I'm just it's over for me.
What would you tell those women?
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Can I go back to your dad?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (27:43):
Your dad?
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Okay, Sean was at the camp right and your dad
had told all of the campers because I'm going to
bring this up because it's coming back to me. He
told them to write down two hundred dreams big or small,
and no, because you when you start writing down two
hundred dreams after ten.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Be like, I don't even I can't even.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Like dream no more after guess And he said for
every dream, he said, whoever.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
Gets this dream book done?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
And you know your dad, because he was like, fucking
y'all just go play niggas, they're gonna do nothing right.
And they said, whatever boy that sits there and do
the dreams. I'm gonna give a dollar for every dream.
And he's gonna be your Millionaire's gonna be your entrepreneur,
your success story. And it was Sean. Sean was Sean,
don't talk to you. You know, Sean don't talk And he
became the Risey star. And so I said, if this
can work for him, you know what I mean. And
(28:30):
then we went to Disney Dreamers Academy and he was like,
y'all parents, y'all need to have a dream too. And
I was like, if this stuff can work for this boy,
why can it work for me? So I started writing
down my dreams. I raised my daughter's phenomenal. She has
a podcast. She doesn't you know? My makeup too. When
I go on red carpets like my kids are phenomenal.
Shout out to Kennedy. And she's the one who stays
(28:53):
on my back. She stays on me. But I said, Laurie,
you raise your kids, why can't you live the life
that God wants you to do. I moved to Atlanta
with nothing. I had two hundred dollars. I lived in
my car, I had no job. I was unemployed. And
I said, girl, God didn't bring you all the way
(29:14):
down here for you just to do nothing. I see,
get up and live. And so what I started doing
is I started investing in myself. When you started working out.
I remember that six o'clock workout that we used to do.
He used to be coming in. You need to give
up that shit and you need to do that.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
So I had started working.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Mury be able to pussy footing around in that workout
where me see just didn't blessed us hard about what
to do with her. She was up in there, she
up in there, and later on just talk and bring
a lunch. She was up there and bring her lunch.
Ch hanging out the legs.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
But I mean, I started dreaming, and I don't think
you're and because you know I'll be scared to talk
to mister Harvey.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
I swear I see him every day. I'll just be like, hey,
so tell him. I said thank you.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
But I started applying. I sit at that camp seven
years in, seven years out. I started applying every that
mister Harvey was telling them boys, I started applying.
Speaker 3 (30:02):
It to my life.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (30:04):
And this is the result of the manifestations of the
habaka to it too. Yeah, because it's never too late.
You have a dream, you have a purpose. One thing
I know is I know I have a purpose, a.
Speaker 3 (30:15):
Passion, and why. I'm very clear on all of them.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Yeah. And when you find your why, it's going to
catapult you to everything else that's going to happen in
your life. Because I'm telling you something major's gear to happen.
So whoever didn't know meaning, I mean like now you
don't know me, Laurie.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
I know you know you don't.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Yeah, I really love that because I think that so
many women, And I mean my mom is over sixty years.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
Alf I love your mother.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
I know she is the best, right, yes, but there
are those moments, you know, even as her daughter, who
I have to give her that, Like, it's not too late.
You can keep going, like you can do the thing
that you really want to do, and so many women
feel like it's a dream deferred. I'm giving up.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
I want to die empty. Yeah, I want to die empty.
And my thing is my I think my main thing
right now is just money. Like I remember we talked about
I'm not rich yet.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
She's a rich Auntie Laurie, but she rich in spirit
and truth and love.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
Yeah, and Diana told me that because see, I need
money to do the things I want to. Like, I
want a PR person, So if anybody want to, like,
you know, I'm going to go be a really big e.
Anybody wanted to like be my PR person, Like I
want all of those things because I want to be
like a brand ambassador. I want to be a lifestyle ambassador.
You know, anybody want to do like glasses.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
I want to start.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
I want people to start seeing that a woman at
my age, you know what I mean, can be a
brand ambassador.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
They can be anything that they want to be.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
And how I got into these media streets, I have
no idea, like, but my thing is I can transcend
every generation.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
I can. I can work with youth.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
I mean, older people love me like I'm really vibing
with you know, the forty and fifty, I mean the
thirty and forty year olds. So I love the fact
that my brand can transcend generations, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
So I get excited about my life.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yeah, what is the thing that you're like really hopeful
for in this season, whether that's career, personal or relationships.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
I'm hopeful that I will start getting paid my worth.
And I have learned when you ask me what I
do for me, know it is a complete sentence, you
know what I mean. Yes, No, it's important, because yes,
it's too expensive. So I learned to put boundaries on
my life just to surround myself with people who the habaka,
(32:38):
who could take my dreams to another level. And like
I said, I don't know what God is doing in
me and through me, but it's going to be something major.
I don't know what it is, but I just feel it.
So those are the things that I'm just hopful for.
That I'm always in God's will his protection, and that
I'm always kind to everyone along the journey.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Yeah, kind to everyone. What would you tell the thirty
five forty year old version of LORI, I'm proud of you.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Like you did it, like so many people counting me out.
But I did it, you know what I mean. I
did it, me and my kids. I would never leave
them out. Me and my kids.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
We did it.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
Yeah, we did it. What is the thing that you
want your daughter to know about you? Not just your son.
I want to talk specifically because because you all are
like super close, she is literally side eye on half
the stuff you'd be doing and saying when.
Speaker 3 (33:31):
She checks me all the time.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
What I want to tell Kenny is I did the
best that I could see.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Now this is about to cry, uh huh.
Speaker 2 (33:40):
And then I'm so proud of her, like she is
her she goes to the beat of her old drone,
you know what I mean. Like Kenny is one of
the kind of like you think I'm fuddy, Kenny is hilarious,
and I just.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Want her to find her true purpose, you know what
I mean, because I think she's amazing.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
You know how you always think it's one chat, but
the other one's going to come up. Kennedy is going
to be the one or the come up, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 3 (34:05):
And that this, like the nor Divergent piece, it.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
Really affects relationships because people don't really get it, you
know what I mean, And it's like you always have
to come back and apologize, but it's like you can't
apologize for who you are and the way that you're wired.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
So for my thing for Kennedy is I'm proud of you.
You're amazing just the way you are. You're You're enough,
you know what I mean, And I think God is
going to bless her beyond her imagination.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Yeah, and thank you for that.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
Thank you because a lot of people only know Sean,
you know, because we're always out in the Mintary program,
So thank you for asking about her.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
And she's our.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Sower too, I know. I mean, Sean is like he
calls you Laurie when you are like in your other
bad right, he'll be like Laurie, uh uh yeah. But
he's also said to you on occasions like your man and.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
See, and that's what I always tell Sean. Can see
then I'm not your woman when you ask me to cook. See,
that's something that that's something that we're going through right
now with him coming home from college and seeing that's
something to mean I need.
Speaker 4 (35:13):
That.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Me and my therapist was talking about, so Sean be
in his little bag, right, so he'd be like, I
ain't your man.
Speaker 3 (35:21):
Well I was about to say.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
I can't say it, but see, and I told the therapist.
I was like, look, you know, we're a team.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
She said.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
A team is when somebody signed up to do something.
She said, Sean is not on your team. If he
didn't say he wanted to be on your team, she said,
so since he's grown, then you make a contract. You
see what I'm saying. So now it's the contract. So
this is the thing with Sean, because you don't want
to do man things like you know how to fix this,
you know how to do that, right. So now I
don't cook because those are women things. So now you'll
(35:52):
just starve. So we have an understanding. You want something
from me, I want something from you. It doesn't have
to be your man, and I don't have to.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Be your one.
Speaker 2 (36:00):
But we're a team. We should be able to help
each other, give and take. So yeah, that made me mad.
Did you see my whole expression change? Yeah, man, because
I think because I do this for a livy. I
hate when women say he's the man of the house.
Don't put that burden on your child. Don't put that
burden on your son. He's not your man, he's not.
(36:21):
But common things like take out the trash, moulder line,
those ain'tmen things. Those are responsibilities because you are contributing.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Member to the house. House.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah, so that's so I'm just gonna put a little
exclamation Sean Lyon, I don't be doing all that.
Speaker 3 (36:36):
Sean just don't want to do what I told him
to do. You'd be like, I'm grown.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
No. You see in my house, I was having a
conversation with somebody and I was telling them that my
sister and men, you know, with BJ, BJ washes close
and I was nine years old. He's been washing clothes
for probably the last two or three years.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
And I love that.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
And she's she has taught him how to put his
clothes in the washing machine. What goes with what what
you do? She saw him. He knows how to do it.
He has meals that he knows how to prepare on
his shot, see right, So whether he can use the
air fryer, he has certain things that he knows how
to put in the oven. I have videos of BJ
(37:19):
as a little kid with his oven mits pulling things.
I love that because what my sister said is and
this is what we've always known, and me as a
former educator, he's going to be a man far longer
than he's going to be a child. Yes, And what
Carly says is that I don't want he's going to
be someone's husband and father one day. And I don't
(37:42):
want him sitting around here thinking that he gotta have
some girl around here just because he don't know how
to cook and jes because he don't know how to
wash his clothes. You're not just gonna have any old
body over here just because she knows how to make
you an alfredo and a taco, you know what I'm saying.
Some CALLI green, you know what I'm saying. Or because
you she folded your laundry up, she did your laundry. No,
(38:05):
you are a self sufficient man. You are going to
know how to be self sufficient because you are a
country to be the member of this household. Yes, and
people are shocked to know that BJ is a nine
year old and he knows how to wash his clothes.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
That yes, because when I went to coll and I
want to do something real quick, I hate that I
didn't teach my kids how to cook because.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
I was so in survival mode. I was so overwhelmed.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
And that's one thing that I regret because I'm a
great cooker, like people don't know, I can throw down.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I just don't like to eat.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
But it's just I hate that I missed that step
because I was so overwhelmed.
Speaker 3 (38:42):
I was going through the divorce.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
I didn't take that time, you know what I mean.
Now they know how to clean, wash the clothes, but
the cooking piece, I think over step.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
Now.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
I told y'all now at home, why are you home
from college? You can learn how to cook. If you
won't learn how to cook, then you don't eat.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
So I mean in this season, yeah, you too food.
Now the whole point you cooking caye up. Maybe somebody
don't teach you how to cut thing?
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Is he just choose to eat out. That's when you
I don't care because I'm because.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
Let me say this. I went out with a with
a man recently fifty three years old, and he said
he don't cook. I said, oh, well baby. In my
mind I didn't even have to say this on the day. Lord,
in my mind, I said, I'm not a maid or
I'm a nurse. Listen, so you say I was.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Do you see how little things.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But LORI fifty three years old, you're talking about you
don't cook. That's first of all, you're a burden.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
Now my whole point because me that I'm going to
carry the weight of cooking.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
I don't even tell you.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
I know, you don't have a dish, you don't have
something you make a great grilled cheese and a tomato soup.
You can't do nothing.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
But see, Brandy, that's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
When you get older, little things like that start mattering,
you know what I mean, Like if I'm sick, right,
I don't eat out a lot. I mean I don't
do fried foods and all that other stuff. So my
thing is, so what are they always say? What do
you bring it to the tape?
Speaker 3 (40:10):
What are you bringing?
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Like?
Speaker 2 (40:12):
Okay, I make my own money, so at this point,
what else can you do to enhance my life?
Speaker 1 (40:18):
We have to enjoy each other at this point, right,
So at these big ages, you know who you are,
even as a woman over forty, you know who you are,
you know what you want, you know, you know the
direction of your life, right, and so we got to
enjoy each other. But part of the enjoyment is I'm
not signing up to be your maid and your and
your and your cook every day and you, oh yeah,
(40:40):
I don't cook. Anybody who tell me they don't cook
at this big age, oh babe, were not twenty five.
You'll not cook nothing. You'll never rattle your pots, baby,
if you'll never rot in your pots, don't think Brandy
about to come over there and do it. And I
cook every day. I don't like to eat though I
like to cook and I like to eat. That's my problem.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
I don't like cooking.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
I love cooking and I and I love.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Anything, but don't.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Oh gosh, Now you know what's so funny when I'm dating,
because I like acts of service. I like to see
I'm a very I'm like a nurturer, right, but for
me just to do it and then like Sean didn
blew it, so he's just starting.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
I'm just not doing that.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
For Sean blew for the man that's coming.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
No, no, I'll do it for a man. But it's
just like, I don't know, I just gotta find somebody.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
I like, you gotta find somebody you like. I mean,
I think that there is someone for everyone. I mean,
but you were also, you're not gonna move you said,
you're not.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
Moving, you know what, because Atlanta's a vibe though at.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
So sexy. But I Atlanta is so sexy because.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
I live in the woods.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
Right, it's so peaceful and quiet, like my doorbell ring,
doorbell go and to be like like deer be like hey.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Lorie, what's up? You know?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
But then I can go into this city if I
want to. I built my career here. I worked too
hard to build my career. Yeah, and I just don't
And then with the ADHD, we don't like a lot
of change.
Speaker 3 (42:10):
I don't like unpredictability.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
So so, but your person might not be in the city.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
They can move here.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
He has to be able to.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
Move or we can you can live there.
Speaker 1 (42:21):
I can live here and we can just see each other.
Speaker 3 (42:24):
Yeah, like you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Like it's it's a Hall movement. It's called the Lat
move and living apart but together living apart to the
LAT movement.
Speaker 2 (42:33):
I just don't want to move because see, once again
it goes back to my childhood.
Speaker 3 (42:36):
Right, I didn't have a mom and them.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
I don't want to leave Kennedy and Sean, you said,
I mean, even though they're grown, but it's the three
of us it's just us three, Like no, you know
what I mean, Like there's no aunties, no uncles, No,
you know what I mean, it's just us three.
Speaker 3 (42:50):
I would just hate to like leave.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Them because I know the abandonment with not having a
mom or anything around.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Yeah, but they still have I know.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
But that's something I would have to work through, Like
I'm not here. What happens if I get a phone
call on them that here? Who else are they going
to call? I can't get here. It's something that I'm
working on internally.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Yeah, And I think that things will work. I think
they might be like, look, she didn't finally.
Speaker 3 (43:16):
Gone on leave a little Kenny, be like I don't
have to do her makeup no more.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
But there's a possibility that the love that you're looking
for is not in the city terras like it's it
may not be in the city, you know. And I
think so many women, I think, and especially black women
in the city of Atlanta have to come to that
conclusion that it may not be here in this city. Yes,
(43:43):
you would, yes in a heartby internationally in the state's
coastal Baby, I will move up out of here so quick,
so fast, be like, where's she taballed.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
Not here, and you know what, the way everything is going,
I might need to move to time, and you know what,
I probably have to be more open to that. So
let me let's go back in case everybody's watching this.
I'm going to be open to move.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
Okay, Okay, Yeah, I'm open. I'm so open because I
love Atlanta like I have. I have roots here, Like
Atlanta has been so good to me. It has grown
me up. I have like grown up in Atlanta. I've
been here eighteen years. So that's a big part of
my life.
Speaker 3 (44:26):
I mean, you know, it's eighty nine yeah, oh wow.
Speaker 1 (44:28):
Yeah. So it's like I love it, but I also
know that he might he I don't think.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
I don't think. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
I don't know if he's here, you know. So I'm open,
you know, another city, another country. It's eight billion people
in the world.
Speaker 2 (44:45):
But I want I want someone that I can share
this new life journey. Yeah, you know what, I mean,
to share all of my excitements. So when I'm doing
something like this that's on my dream book, I can
be like, guess what, and it's like, you know what.
Speaker 3 (44:57):
I mean. You have your own personal cheerleader because everybody
would say, I don't need a man. I don't need
I need a man.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
You know, Laurie, I said I need one.
Speaker 3 (45:07):
I don't know why.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
You may not know he there, but he is a
man mayor somewhere.
Speaker 3 (45:11):
Yeah, I mean, who gets pleasure in doing all this?
Speaker 2 (45:14):
But I don't want to be a superwoman. I don't
want to be a strong black woman. I don't want
to do all those things.
Speaker 3 (45:19):
I don't you know what I mean. But yeah, I
want to take off my cape. I want to be
the feminine person.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
You want to take off your cape? Want to be feminine.
What's the one thing you're looking forward to is we
begin to close out or one word you're committed to
in the season of your life?
Speaker 3 (45:34):
Intentionality?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
Intentionality.
Speaker 2 (45:37):
I want to be intentional on everything I do because
I think time and in this time and the space
in the world that we live in now, everything needs
to be intentional because you don't know what's going to
happen next. I want to be intentional with everyone that
I'm encountering. I want to be intentional with my time,
with my focus, with my energy. I want to be intentional.
Speaker 1 (45:56):
Yeah, what's the one thing that you know from this
point going forward, that you're going to be intentional about one.
Speaker 2 (46:04):
Thing, finding love, finding love, finding love and finding me finding.
Speaker 3 (46:16):
No because it was.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
A play on the book, but finding love and finding you.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Yeah, because if that's the reason I did that, because
I'm intentional about finding love and then the process of
finding me, you know what I mean, Because there's still
so many areas that I need to tap into that
I'm open to tap into because I think so many
times at my age we get center our way.
Speaker 3 (46:36):
Well, that's just the way I am.
Speaker 2 (46:38):
But if if the way that I am is not
working for me, then some adjustments need to be made.
Speaker 1 (46:42):
Yeah, some adjustments, Doctor Lorie Hanford. It has been a pleasure.
Thank you for joinings. I'm so glad we checked this
off the bucket list of things to do. The vision
board is working. Just lets you know for all those
people y'all know, we got a vision board chorus over here,
Vaught in Power, So you should go ahead and download
division board chorus. Why are you here? Because Laurie is
(47:04):
a prime example of write the vision, make it plain.
I want you to share this with somebody who needs
to be more intentional in their lives in this season
with their goals, their dreams, and even finding love. Until
next time, I'm your girl, Brandy Harvey eat Well, give
a damn move your body every single day.
Speaker 3 (47:19):
Peace,
You've been here and you told me, Brandy, it's my dream.
I put on my vision board. I'm going to sit
in this seat. This diagnosis of being neurodiversion, it came
later in life. Fifty five is when you said I'm
gonna go out here and live my dreams.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I'm always in control and there's never a safe space
for me to just be feminine.
Speaker 3 (00:21):
If you want me to be feminine, to give me.
It's like men always say I wantn't peace, but then
you raise hell.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
Because I think so many times at my age we
get sent our way. Well, that's just the way I am.
But if the way that I am is not working
for me, then some adjustments need to be mere.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Welcome to bought Empower's talks. For we don't just scratch
the surface. We dive deep into the lives of some
of the world's most influential change makers. I'm your host,
Brandy Harvey. Y'all, I got the rich aunte in the
building today. Doctor Lorie Hanford, affectionately known as rich I'm
She's an award winning educator, red carpet correspondent, and storyteller
(01:05):
who shows a bowlly in every room she enters. With
more than twenty years in education, doctor Hanford has been
a lifeline for at risk youth, helping them rise with
the belief that their story isn't over, It's just getting started.
She's been named Students Support Specialists of the Year for
both her school and the entire Decab County School District,
and honored with a I Am a Difference Maker Award
(01:27):
for her relentless impact. Outside of the classroom. She shines
in front of the camera as a lead correspondent for
Ato Plus magazine and has gray shows like The Mel
Robbins Show, The Portia Show, and a star on the
Netflix hit The Later Daters. She holds a Presidential Lifetime
Achievement Award in an honorary Doctorate in Humanities. Whether mentoring
(01:48):
with the Stephen Marjorie Harvey Foundation or repping Delta Sigma Theta,
Laurie's life is proof that when service is your calling,
the spotlight will find you. Vaught Inpower Talk's Welcome Mother
Philanthropists and meet the amazing doctor Lorii Hanford to the show.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
It was the intro for me.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Clock it, Laurie. It's a pleasure.
Speaker 3 (02:14):
I'm going to cry.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Why are you gonna? Yeah? She's been saying this since
she walked in here. We have to go ahead and
tell this.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Laurie.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I have known you since your son came to the
mentoring program. Your son, Sean came to the mentoring program
in twenty seventeen, into the Steve Harvey Mentoring program. That
was when we first met, and then you have just
remained a constant. I don't It's like, Laurie, I can't
escape you. I go to church, there's Laurie. I go
(02:44):
to an event, I see Laurie. I go to the
mentoring program, Laurie is there.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
Now I'm going to mentor That's one thing I'm gonna
do that Stephen Marjorie Harvey Foundation has literally changed my life.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
It saved my life to save Sean's life. So you're
always going to see me there.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Well, yeah, I'm so excited. I mean, I feel like
I've gotten to know you. And then even when we
started to show you, you dubbed yourself the official greeter
of Bought empower Tae. Y'all don't know she's been behind
the scenes.
Speaker 3 (03:10):
I've been in the studio audience. She's been in the
studio audience.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Listen, you've been here and you told me, Brandy, it's
my dream. I put on my vision board. I'm going
to sit in the seat of question. I did. Here
you are.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Because I used to take notes when you were like interviewing.
I mean when you were doing the interviews. I would
just sit there and take notes. And I said, I'm
just sitting in that chair. One day I did I
bought it too or too write the vision down and
make a plane.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Yeah, and you have written the vision. You've made a plane.
Speaker 3 (03:40):
And I'm right here and you were here and.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
We ran into each other at the mentoring program and
I said, well, I got to opening.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
Right cause I wanted you to do an introduction.
Speaker 2 (03:49):
Remember, I said, Brindy, can you just do an introduction
from my Instagram?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Yeah? She had me do the intro on the spot
outside ninety degrees.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
I'm sitting on the fishy ponds.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Yeah, sitting at the pond, on a on a on
a on a little truck. And you're like, can you
do an intro? Put the camera up on the spot.
So I did my best.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
It was good this tea. I'll you're like, I'm all that,
Oh my god, Yeah, it's here.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
I mean, you've had quite the career. You are a
media maven. Everybody in Atlanta. If you are in in
or around Atlanta in any event, you're gonna see Lori.
You're gonna see the gray hair and the glasses. Oh
and see they're off today and you didn't wear them today,
right because you recently were on the show Later Daters
(04:40):
on Netflix.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Yes, yeah, and the glasses were uh a what it
was a hot topic.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Girl.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I got dragged on TikTok and stuff about the glasses.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I really can't even believe that. Yes, but maybe because
it's been such a such a signature look for you
since I've known you.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
And I can't see it's so that's what you can understand.
And then the glasses were expensive. So I'm going aware of.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Them and I like them, but I want to do
something different, you know, Richalte Laurie is cool, but I'm
still Lori, you know what I mean. And La Terra
said something that was very powerful when I did the
Dear Future wifey. He said, did you ever ask men
what they like? People need to see your eyes, they
need to see your faith. People want to engage with Lorii,
you know, And sometimes the glasses could be a hindrance.
(05:28):
Now I heard that on the show. But it's how
you talk to me. It's how you speak to me,
you know, And if I have a relationship with you,
I'm more apt to adapt, you.
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Because the dating coach on the show Later Daters. And
if our audience isn't familiar, you can go check this out.
It was in the top ten on Netflix for quite
a few weeks on Netflix. And this is a show
about people who are seasoned and they are still looking
for love. Yes, yeah, still looking for love. So she says,
(06:02):
she's a whole vibe y'all.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Oh, I am Pramo Machiato.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Yes, you're Camra Machiato, Cara Machado.
Speaker 3 (06:08):
Okay, why why that the expresso the punch? Right? You
got the punch because I'm a little feisty.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Uh huh.
Speaker 2 (06:15):
You have the caramel, which is really softest move if
you if I trust you and let you in, you
get the really soft Lori. Then you have the whipped cream.
I'm really fun, I'm really lively. Yes, and then you
stirred all together, you get loris vibe.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
I mean, let's talk about the Later Daters, because when
we watched the show which I told you. I remember
when you sent it to me and said, hey, I
got this show that just coming out. I want you
to watch it. And it took me a few weeks,
so like, let me finally sit down and worn like
and just binge it. And when I sat down and
watched it, I really enjoyed it. And then I knew
(06:52):
people on it because I knew miss Denise because I
was friends with her daughter. Oh yeah, I was friends
with Duenna. Yeah. Yeah, So when I saw you and
I'm like, they go to church together, y'all.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And I never seen an these before. I mean, I
never knew that was her. We went to church every day.
We never knew that we were feel me.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
And I thought that you all knew each other from
new birth.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
No, and then actually I was going to put Jamal
in it. Jamal was going to actually.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Be it and he didn't need to be right, No,
he was going to.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Be a part of it.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
And then it's like the timing was always off, Okay,
So I was like, but then Jamal is gonna take
the show, right. So what happened is they took things
from the Red Carpet and inserted him in.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
Yeah, I did the Red carpet.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
So what did that show teach you? Because I mean,
we looked at so many different facets of women and
men who are still looking for love. But you caught
a lot of back backlash because people thought you were
being a little too picky. Some comments were like, you're
a little too masculine.
Speaker 3 (07:52):
We did that all the time.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Yeah, and yes, a lot of people say I'm masculine
because I'm like, and this is what I was telling
the dating coach. I have to be in control of everything.
I was a mom raising my kids. I was doing that,
so I gotta control that. Then I'm a behavior coach, right.
My specialty is at risk young boys, black boys, and crisis.
That's what I'm specialized in. So I gotta be in
(08:14):
control of that. Then when I go to a red carpet.
You know how celebrities are, not.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
All of them, some of them. I have to manage
a carpet.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
I'm always in control, and there's never a safe space
for me to just be feminine.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
If you want me to be feminine, to give me.
Speaker 2 (08:27):
It's like men always say I want peace, but then
you raise hell. I can't be peace in hell. You
see what I'm saying, I don't know where my sayings
be coming from, but give me a soft space.
Speaker 3 (08:40):
And I never have time to have that soft space.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
So yeah, I did get all the masculine comments, but
I think once you get to know me, I'm really
not that way. I'm just I have to learn how
to let go of control.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Yeah, I mean I notice it, And I think I
was able to watch it with a different vantage point
and leans only because I knew that you were a
single mother. I knew that you'd experience some you know,
really deep heartbreak and loss and grieving in relationship, and
so I knew that you were walking into that with
that that's a part of the story. Yes, right, So
(09:12):
I was able to see that. But even when I
talked to a friend recently and said you were coming
on the show and she was like, she was very
masculine on the show, was like really, I was like,
I said, you know, I said, I think she comes
across She probably came across maskling because she's never had
the opportunity to be soft, thank you. And so then
when I go and I'm prepping for you and I'm
(09:33):
watching you on the terrace, and then I'm like that
was it, like she she's never had the reason. Nobody's
in ever, no one's ever given you the permission to
let your guard down.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
You got it, and thank you, thank you for defending me,
because like I said, you know that show it even
meant like when they have that liquid courage, they'd be like, y'all,
you just be knocking the men down.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
You just be doing that. Why is it? Because I
speak my truth? You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
I have to be masculine. You know, I am very
a type a personality. I'm very matter of fact. I'm
very in your face type of person you know what
I mean. Because I think for so long I had
I was the shy little girl. I was the bullyed
little girl. And now this little ten year old version
of me, nobody's ever going to mess with me or
(10:20):
play with me again. So I'm still trying to heal
that ten year old little girl that and let her
know that she's saved. Everybody's not coming for you, you
know what I mean. And I think so many times
people don't heal the childhood trauma and it shows up
in different ways.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
I mean, you talked about a liqual courage because you
said that's a red flat for you as men men
who drink, you know, and they have if they're drinking
alcohol excessively because you had an alcoholic father and you
grew up with that. But you, I mean, one of
the things that I learned about you was so many things.
I feel like that layer into how you probably are
(10:57):
showing up in this season of your life. Yes, mother
died at eleven, yep, father died at twenty five, and
then you were dealing with molestation from a woman. All
of this is happening at ten, eleven, twelve.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Yeah, and then you have to think all of my
aunt and uncles on both sides are deceased, so there's
no family, right, So I don't have a grandmother or grandfather.
Speaker 3 (11:22):
I don't have aunt and uncles. They're all deceased, my mom,
my dad, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
So that's a lot to uncover. So I bury a
lot of it. And that was the first time on
the Terra's podcast that I ever talked about being molested
by a woman, because back then I didn't know that
was molestation, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (11:40):
Who am I telling? I mean, I didn't know. So yeah,
so there's so many different layers so masculine.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
If that's how you feel, I mean, I'll take it.
I mean, because I know who I am. But I'm
working on softening up LOORI because I want to show
up as a different person.
Speaker 3 (11:57):
You know.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
They always say if something's not working for you, you
can't just be like that's how I am.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
No.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
I mean, if there's rule for improvement, then I'm going
to improve.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Yeah. So yeah, but you said the trick at this
age is that most people are stuck in their ways.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Yes, they're stuck in their ways. Yeah, and I don't
want to be stuck.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah, you'll please, no vacline oil, whatever you need me do.
Let me just try to ease my weight on out
of here.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Yeah. So how are you working to show up differently
in this season? And I mean I think sometimes you
you're having to kind of jump the hurdle of what
people saw of you on the show.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
Yeah, especially different with men. Well one therapy. I go
to therapy and I have a really good trauma therapy.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
Oh that's so good.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
Yeah she is bad? Oh my god, could she be
like You're just wrong?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
I mean, how's that working for you?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
LORI?
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Like, I like, yeah, like my little feelings be hurt.
She really does worth it though, So that's my best.
You know how people go by purses and all that
other stuff. Mine just trying to help myself. Another thing
is a lot of men always say, Lourie, you know
we would.
Speaker 3 (13:09):
I got some friends, but they just like you be
outside too much. I'm working. It ain't like I'm at
a hookah bar, you know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
What I mean.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
Like, it ain't like I'm at a club.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
I am literally working. You know, too many people or
you post too many men. It's the business that I'm in.
So I like on this show, I qualified. Are you
okay being around a lot of people? I mean, I
don't consider myself a celebrity, but I guess everybody else does,
because I mean.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
You're the Lord, You're a celebrity.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
No, said Airport.
Speaker 2 (13:38):
I was at good Will yesterday and I get stopped.
I got a T shirt from good Will and says,
you don't know me. I'm going to wear it every day.
And they be like, oh, I went to go Sean
got a hit and run accident, right, I had to
go get the records thing.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
I'm at the police department. Oh my god, Oh my god,
it's you.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
I'm just trying to get a record and I take
a picture. Oh my god, did you end up with fell?
So it's like everywhere I go and I don't see
myself like that, you know. So that's a problem for
a lot of men. So I need to find somebody.
If I was a man, I would definitely date me
because I would be in those rooms. I would be networking,
my business, doing everything. But it's you, like La Terra said,
(14:19):
it was going to take a pretty confident man to
on the spaces stuff.
Speaker 1 (14:22):
I mean for sure, because you have a lot of
male friends, now, y'all, don't you dad?
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Y'all?
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Lauri stayed with a fine best friend. Okay, she she
had the mentor in camp. I said, well who was that?
She said, oh, that's my best friend. I said, that's
your best friend, your best male friend. Looked like that.
You ain't never? She said, never, Brandy, I've never. And
I said, I said, I loved that for you. That
wouldn't have been my story because she's one.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Of my closest friends. And you know what, I like
the fact. And that's when I said I could cut
the pace him. He's studies me. Like we were having
a conversation meet him and Sean, and he was like,
what people don't know about your mom is once she
feels safe, she opens up and a lot of men
don't know that about me.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
He was like, and she's one of the sweetest people
you will ever know.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
She would do anything for you, because see he looked
past all that hard stuff, you know what I mean,
and he sees LORI, but I have to be safe
around you, especially where I am now. I don't know
if you like me because of my connection. Can you
introduce me to Jamal?
Speaker 3 (15:29):
Can I hear?
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Can you tell mister Harvey I want to come to
the camp or you know, it's like I get a
lot of that. And once you start asking me about people,
you don't want me for me. You want me for
the people that I'm connected to or the spaces that
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
I mean, let's talk about, you know, some of these
spaces that you are in and how that's going to
help you kind of accelerate this look for love in
your life. Because one of the things that you've been
very vocal about is talking about you want to find love.
You want to be the answer prayer.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
You forgot this that part what is that I pray
for you did that?
Speaker 1 (16:10):
So you okay? You want all that answer?
Speaker 4 (16:13):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (16:13):
I do want to be an answer to a man's
answer to a man's prayer. And so how are you
working to be the answer to a man's prayer? What
prayer do you want to answer?
Speaker 3 (16:23):
You know?
Speaker 2 (16:24):
And that's why what men I always literisaid, if you
want to know what a man is thinking, ask the man.
So I asked, like my guy friends like, so what
do you what is this?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
What is that?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
You know?
Speaker 3 (16:33):
What I mean? How do I show up? Is the
main thing that men said are.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
The glasses, Laurie, Like you have pretty eyes, we can't
see them.
Speaker 3 (16:41):
You know.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Most men have said they don't want to date you
because of the glasses.
Speaker 2 (16:44):
No, no, they're saying that. I'm asking them, how how
can I improve?
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Like?
Speaker 3 (16:50):
Show up?
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Bet?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
You know what, Laurie. You know, show your face more.
You know, I want to get to know your face.
Speaker 3 (16:56):
Men want to do it. Then, one of my guys,
I do have a lot of guy friends.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
I got do this. You have a lot of guy friends.
Speaker 4 (17:03):
I do.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Yeah, I'm not judging.
Speaker 3 (17:05):
Nod I have. I have a lot, But I want
to get out the friend zone. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
But I don't know there's any of them that I
want to date. But I love the fact that they
pour into me. So I want to show up. I
want to show up a softer.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
I'm trying to work on my feminine side, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
But then, so are you taking some sort of classes,
you have some sort of coach? Are you doing things
that like improve being more subductive? What are you working on? Well?
Speaker 3 (17:31):
See, I wore this today.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
Okay, okay, okay, okay. I love that it's given a
little a little bit little peokable.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
It's a little and I see I have great legs.
But I don't know if I can come in here
in short so you could wear whatever you want it here,
I could have show the legs.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
But I want to shout out to Stacy J. I
need to get with Stacy J for real.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
But I want to learn how to be a little
I've never seen it before, you know what I mean.
I never seen it because you remember, I didn't have
the mom and you know it was all of that.
So I wanted to learn how to walk in my
feminine way, you know what I mean? Yeah, just be
more kind and one thing that we talked about on
the show that didn't get to the show is I'm neurodivergent.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
So once you've written a whole book finding Love, Finding
Me a neuro Virgin's journey to finding love.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yes, so I have ADHD. So I might interrupt you,
I might overtalk you. You see what I'm saying.
Speaker 3 (18:25):
My dopamine level gets low, so I might.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
You might think I'm combat of men, say word, you're
combat of No, I'm passionate.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Why do I have to be compative?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Why can I just not be passionate about what I'm
talking about. I'm highly intelligent. That's what people understand. So
if you're going to talk about global affairs, I'm here
with you. If you want to talk about this, I
can go to the Mayor's Ball with Andre Dickens, or
I can go to the mentoring camp.
Speaker 3 (18:46):
Either way, I'm going to be able to relate on
all levels.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
So I need someone who can navigate those spaces with
me and understand.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
How my brain is wired.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
I might be looking at you, but then I have
a scroll brain and I'm over here looking at hand
and I'm doing this.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
But I heard everything that you said. Yeah, so that
all those things.
Speaker 1 (19:04):
This this diagnosis of being neurodiversion. It came later in life.
Speaker 2 (19:09):
Yes, yes, because I was like, something is wrong with me,
Like I'm just.
Speaker 3 (19:16):
It was the combativeness.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
It's like you know, and now that I started getting
more into ADHD, it's a dopamine thing, you know what
I mean.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
I need the rush.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
So if I'm over talking people and I was always
talking too much, now I get paid to talk.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Remember I was talking about that. Yeah, because it was like.
Speaker 2 (19:32):
I'm always my brain is processing. And then this is
what I love about my job. I wish I had
me at school when I was coming up. When my
babies question anything like say go sit down, Well, why
do I have to sit down? What am I doing?
That's not a sign of disrespect, It's a side of
my brain is processing.
Speaker 3 (19:50):
Why is that best for me?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (19:52):
And so when people look at as combativeness, I'm looking
as processing.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Yeah, you know I need to know why.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
So when you think back over your marriage because you
were divorced, but well, nobody's ever done that to me.
When you look back at your at your marriage, because
you all went through a pretty tough divorce, tumultuous. I
was gonna use the word tumultuous, but I didn't know
(20:21):
if we can say that it was a very tumultuous divorce.
And so when you look back, was that neual divergent
behavior showing up in the marriage and you were unaware?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
I was unaware?
Speaker 2 (20:36):
Yes, So sometimes we can blame people, then you have
to go back and do insight.
Speaker 1 (20:40):
Yeah, what I mean.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
So it's like, wow, I wouldn't And I'm going to
say this part because I normally don't talk.
Speaker 3 (20:48):
I don't give people energy.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
But I know when we went to counseling, you and
your ex husband, yes, me and my ex husband, yes,
your husband my husband. Pors told me that when a
Porsche showed she said, loriie their husbands.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
When I was going.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Through counseling and they diagnosed me, they was like, your
wife has this, this and this, and by that time
he was already checked out, you know. And it's like,
but why would you leave somebody because their brain is different?
Speaker 3 (21:16):
You see what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
That's just like if you have cancer or if you
have leukemia, do you leave people when they're broken?
Speaker 1 (21:23):
You said, Well, the studies are showing and a lot
of research is coming out about the fact that a
lot of men leave women when they become ill or
sick or say they've been diagnosed with cancer. You know,
sometimes men don't.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Have the wiring y yes, the capacity. And so I
even see it showed up as Sean and I love
how Sean and Kennedy, both of my kids showed up
in that show.
Speaker 3 (21:44):
That was hilarious.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
They were definitely like your little watch dogs, protectors. But
also that is they held you accountable and that.
Speaker 3 (21:54):
They do that all the time.
Speaker 2 (21:56):
And so from a male's point of view, you always
have to ask Sean, Sean be like mom, and then he'll.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Say, hey, Lorii, you know what I mean, or my
daughter'll be.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Like stop, Okay, let's stop, or you know what I
mean boundaries, So they really hold me accountable. When my
brain is overprocessing, they'll take me back to writing.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Yeah. So when you look at right now, in the
space that you're in, how are you able to manage
love on the spectrum?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
It has been working, it hasn't been working. This is
really I'm going to just put this out there. Like me,
I'm hyper focused, right, I can only really deal with
one person at the time. But if you start ghosting
and if you're like we're talking every day, and my
dopamine is up, and you missed two or three days,
I forgot that you ever existed.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
So if a man does not call you in two
days and y'all have been talking consistently, he's done.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
No, he's not done you because see, life happens. I
got five hundred and ninety two text messages. I might
not even respond to you, like you know what I mean? Yeah,
But it's just like, you know, my brain, since I'm
hyper focused, if I haven't talked to you in a
couple of days, you probably went down my little priority list, Okay,
and then if you call me, I'm probably be like,
who is this?
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I mean?
Speaker 1 (23:08):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Yes, my brain has processed out, so no, I mean,
and I think that's what we were talking about. Everything.
People have life going on. When you meet somebody, they're
not gonna stop their whole life for you. I can't
stop my whole life from you. Hey what are you doing?
I'm on a carpet, Hey, what are you doing? I'm
interviewed with Brandy. I mean, my life is like really everywhere,
(23:29):
but I'll prioritize who I need to prioritize.
Speaker 1 (23:32):
Yeah, how are you prioritizing you in this season? Because
I watched you when you were on the Mail Robbins episode,
which was like five years ago, season one of Mail Robbins, right,
the pre podcast. This was like talk show Mail Robbins,
and you were just a very different person. Like I
was like I was watching that. I was like, you
(23:54):
were so you had a different energy, you had a
different aura about yourself.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
What was that for you? What was the energy in
the aura? What was it?
Speaker 1 (24:02):
You seemed down?
Speaker 3 (24:04):
I was highly I was really young.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Yeah. I didn't want to diagnose you, but I was like,
she looked.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
I was dessed. I was yea, And see this is
the part where I go cry. I was defeated. I
was broken. That was the part. I was literally on welfare.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
I was trying to figure it out, like because I
had five years ago.
Speaker 3 (24:22):
Yeah, almost about five years ago. Yeah about pre COVID.
That was almost pre COVID pre COVID.
Speaker 2 (24:27):
Yeah no, no, no, no, no, let's take that back.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
I had had.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
I was awful welfare body then. But I was so
depressed because I was still trying to find my way,
find my life, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (24:41):
And it's like I had to.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
I have a best friend named Shaman and she's a sore.
She's my sands And she said, Laurie, you got to
stop being the victim. You are the victim of your
own story. And so then my therapist had told me,
they was like, if your brain is going to loop,
why not loop it.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
With positive affirmation?
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Because I was just like, you know what, I'm just
this that you know, I ain't got no job, and
I'm just this, and you know I need more money
and I.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Still need more money.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
But you know, if all of those things were gonna loop,
your brain is gonna loop, why don't you loop it
with positive things? And when I went back and looked
at that show, I said, I'd be dog oning. I
was so broken. And from that show, I started rebuilding
my life. I started changing the way I talk to myself. Laurie,
you're worthy, You're gonna do this. You have greatness inside
(25:28):
of you, You're going to be this.
Speaker 3 (25:29):
I started.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I like this right now is a manifestation of how
I talk to myself.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
Yeah, yeah, I mean I could see it. I mean
you talked about on the show. It was other women
who had experienced divorce and a deep heart break and
you know, Mail was kind of helping you guys work
through this challenging med. Yeah, she was on you, she
was on me. You was trying to overtalk her too. Lord,
that was that was that was that you popping up.
(25:56):
I was like, Laurie, if you won't shut your ass
up on this show.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I'm trying to be like really present with you because
I'm working on not trying to interrupt people.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
So this is a whole process for me.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
You're doing great. Let me just tell you that you're
doing great, because I mean really, when I watched you,
I was like, it felt like you wanted to overcompensate
for whatever you were feeling in that moment, like let
me just say some you know, say something. And sometimes
we feel these spaces in our lives with meaningless words
or conversations, right, But I could tell that you were
(26:29):
not this version of you. I was like, God, you
just seem so much lighter, so much freer. I will
say this, you seem freer in this season.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
I am yeah, because I just know God has something
amazing for me. And I'll be sixty in October. I know,
I know, I know I don't look sixty, but I
just know this is just the beginning for me. I
just know that there is something big coming with I
don't even know what it is, like, I don't know
what it is, but I know there is something major
(26:59):
that is about to happen, and I just have to
prepare for it and be ready.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I love that I do.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
I just I feel it.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
I mean, I want you to talk to the women
because you you said at fifty five, really at fifty five,
so this is that five years that we're talking about.
Fifty five is when you said, I'm going to go
out here and live my dreams. I'm going to do
the things that I want to do. And I think
that so many women who are listening to us right
now have found themselves in these spaces and places where
(27:31):
they feel like I'm too old, I'm divorced, my kids
are grown, I've somehow, I'm just it's over for me.
What would you tell those women?
Speaker 3 (27:41):
Can I go back to your dad?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (27:43):
Your dad?
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Okay, Sean was at the camp right and your dad
had told all of the campers because I'm going to
bring this up because it's coming back to me. He
told them to write down two hundred dreams big or small,
and no, because you when you start writing down two
hundred dreams after ten.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
Be like, I don't even I can't even.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Like dream no more after guess And he said for
every dream, he said, whoever.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
Gets this dream book done?
Speaker 2 (28:08):
And you know your dad, because he was like, fucking
y'all just go play niggas, they're gonna do nothing right.
And they said, whatever boy that sits there and do
the dreams. I'm gonna give a dollar for every dream.
And he's gonna be your Millionaire's gonna be your entrepreneur,
your success story. And it was Sean. Sean was Sean,
don't talk to you. You know, Sean don't talk And he
became the Risey star. And so I said, if this
can work for him, you know what I mean. And
(28:30):
then we went to Disney Dreamers Academy and he was like,
y'all parents, y'all need to have a dream too. And
I was like, if this stuff can work for this boy,
why can it work for me? So I started writing
down my dreams. I raised my daughter's phenomenal. She has
a podcast. She doesn't you know? My makeup too. When
I go on red carpets like my kids are phenomenal.
Shout out to Kennedy. And she's the one who stays
(28:53):
on my back. She stays on me. But I said, Laurie,
you raise your kids, why can't you live the life
that God wants you to do. I moved to Atlanta
with nothing. I had two hundred dollars. I lived in
my car, I had no job. I was unemployed. And
I said, girl, God didn't bring you all the way
(29:14):
down here for you just to do nothing. I see,
get up and live. And so what I started doing
is I started investing in myself. When you started working out.
I remember that six o'clock workout that we used to do.
He used to be coming in. You need to give
up that shit and you need to do that.
Speaker 3 (29:28):
So I had started working.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Mury be able to pussy footing around in that workout
where me see just didn't blessed us hard about what
to do with her. She was up in there, she
up in there, and later on just talk and bring
a lunch. She was up there and bring her lunch.
Ch hanging out the legs.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
But I mean, I started dreaming, and I don't think
you're and because you know I'll be scared to talk
to mister Harvey.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
I swear I see him every day. I'll just be like, hey,
so tell him. I said thank you.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
But I started applying. I sit at that camp seven
years in, seven years out. I started applying every that
mister Harvey was telling them boys, I started applying.
Speaker 3 (30:02):
It to my life.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (30:04):
And this is the result of the manifestations of the
habaka to it too. Yeah, because it's never too late.
You have a dream, you have a purpose. One thing
I know is I know I have a purpose, a.
Speaker 3 (30:15):
Passion, and why. I'm very clear on all of them.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Yeah. And when you find your why, it's going to
catapult you to everything else that's going to happen in
your life. Because I'm telling you something major's gear to happen.
So whoever didn't know meaning, I mean like now you
don't know me, Laurie.
Speaker 3 (30:32):
I know you know you don't.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Yeah, I really love that because I think that so
many women, And I mean my mom is over sixty years.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
Alf I love your mother.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
I know she is the best, right, yes, but there
are those moments, you know, even as her daughter, who
I have to give her that, Like, it's not too late.
You can keep going, like you can do the thing
that you really want to do, and so many women
feel like it's a dream deferred. I'm giving up.
Speaker 2 (30:58):
I want to die empty. Yeah, I want to die empty.
And my thing is my I think my main thing
right now is just money. Like I remember we talked about
I'm not rich yet.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
She's a rich Auntie Laurie, but she rich in spirit
and truth and love.
Speaker 2 (31:13):
Yeah, and Diana told me that because see, I need
money to do the things I want to. Like, I
want a PR person, So if anybody want to, like,
you know, I'm going to go be a really big e.
Anybody wanted to like be my PR person, Like I
want all of those things because I want to be
like a brand ambassador. I want to be a lifestyle ambassador.
You know, anybody want to do like glasses.
Speaker 3 (31:31):
I want to start.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
I want people to start seeing that a woman at
my age, you know what I mean, can be a
brand ambassador.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
They can be anything that they want to be.
Speaker 2 (31:42):
And how I got into these media streets, I have
no idea, like, but my thing is I can transcend
every generation.
Speaker 3 (31:50):
I can. I can work with youth.
Speaker 2 (31:51):
I mean, older people love me like I'm really vibing
with you know, the forty and fifty, I mean the
thirty and forty year olds. So I love the fact
that my brand can transcend generations, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (32:03):
So I get excited about my life.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yeah, what is the thing that you're like really hopeful
for in this season, whether that's career, personal or relationships.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
I'm hopeful that I will start getting paid my worth.
And I have learned when you ask me what I
do for me, know it is a complete sentence, you
know what I mean. Yes, No, it's important, because yes,
it's too expensive. So I learned to put boundaries on
my life just to surround myself with people who the habaka,
(32:38):
who could take my dreams to another level. And like
I said, I don't know what God is doing in
me and through me, but it's going to be something major.
I don't know what it is, but I just feel it.
So those are the things that I'm just hopful for.
That I'm always in God's will his protection, and that
I'm always kind to everyone along the journey.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Yeah, kind to everyone. What would you tell the thirty
five forty year old version of LORI, I'm proud of you.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Like you did it, like so many people counting me out.
But I did it, you know what I mean. I
did it, me and my kids. I would never leave
them out. Me and my kids.
Speaker 3 (33:11):
We did it.
Speaker 1 (33:12):
Yeah, we did it. What is the thing that you
want your daughter to know about you? Not just your son.
I want to talk specifically because because you all are
like super close, she is literally side eye on half
the stuff you'd be doing and saying when.
Speaker 3 (33:31):
She checks me all the time.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
What I want to tell Kenny is I did the
best that I could see.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Now this is about to cry, uh huh.
Speaker 2 (33:40):
And then I'm so proud of her, like she is
her she goes to the beat of her old drone,
you know what I mean. Like Kenny is one of
the kind of like you think I'm fuddy, Kenny is hilarious,
and I just.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Want her to find her true purpose, you know what
I mean, because I think she's amazing.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
You know how you always think it's one chat, but
the other one's going to come up. Kennedy is going
to be the one or the come up, you know
what I mean.
Speaker 3 (34:05):
And that this, like the nor Divergent piece, it.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
Really affects relationships because people don't really get it, you
know what I mean, And it's like you always have
to come back and apologize, but it's like you can't
apologize for who you are and the way that you're wired.
Speaker 3 (34:23):
So for my thing for Kennedy is I'm proud of you.
You're amazing just the way you are. You're You're enough,
you know what I mean, And I think God is
going to bless her beyond her imagination.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Yeah, and thank you for that.
Speaker 2 (34:39):
Thank you because a lot of people only know Sean,
you know, because we're always out in the Mintary program,
So thank you for asking about her.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:46):
And she's our.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Sower too, I know. I mean, Sean is like he
calls you Laurie when you are like in your other
bad right, he'll be like Laurie, uh uh yeah. But
he's also said to you on occasions like your man and.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
See, and that's what I always tell Sean. Can see
then I'm not your woman when you ask me to cook. See,
that's something that that's something that we're going through right
now with him coming home from college and seeing that's
something to mean I need.
Speaker 4 (35:13):
That.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Me and my therapist was talking about, so Sean be
in his little bag, right, so he'd be like, I
ain't your man.
Speaker 3 (35:21):
Well I was about to say.
Speaker 2 (35:22):
I can't say it, but see, and I told the therapist.
I was like, look, you know, we're a team.
Speaker 3 (35:29):
She said.
Speaker 2 (35:30):
A team is when somebody signed up to do something.
She said, Sean is not on your team. If he
didn't say he wanted to be on your team, she said,
so since he's grown, then you make a contract. You
see what I'm saying. So now it's the contract. So
this is the thing with Sean, because you don't want
to do man things like you know how to fix this,
you know how to do that, right. So now I
don't cook because those are women things. So now you'll
(35:52):
just starve. So we have an understanding. You want something
from me, I want something from you. It doesn't have
to be your man, and I don't have to.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Be your one.
Speaker 2 (36:00):
But we're a team. We should be able to help
each other, give and take. So yeah, that made me mad.
Did you see my whole expression change? Yeah, man, because
I think because I do this for a livy. I
hate when women say he's the man of the house.
Don't put that burden on your child. Don't put that
burden on your son. He's not your man, he's not.
(36:21):
But common things like take out the trash, moulder line,
those ain'tmen things. Those are responsibilities because you are contributing.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Member to the house. House.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah, so that's so I'm just gonna put a little
exclamation Sean Lyon, I don't be doing all that.
Speaker 3 (36:36):
Sean just don't want to do what I told him
to do. You'd be like, I'm grown.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
No. You see in my house, I was having a
conversation with somebody and I was telling them that my
sister and men, you know, with BJ, BJ washes close
and I was nine years old. He's been washing clothes
for probably the last two or three years.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
And I love that.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
And she's she has taught him how to put his
clothes in the washing machine. What goes with what what
you do? She saw him. He knows how to do it.
He has meals that he knows how to prepare on
his shot, see right, So whether he can use the
air fryer, he has certain things that he knows how
to put in the oven. I have videos of BJ
(37:19):
as a little kid with his oven mits pulling things.
I love that because what my sister said is and
this is what we've always known, and me as a
former educator, he's going to be a man far longer
than he's going to be a child. Yes, And what
Carly says is that I don't want he's going to
be someone's husband and father one day. And I don't
(37:42):
want him sitting around here thinking that he gotta have
some girl around here just because he don't know how
to cook and jes because he don't know how to
wash his clothes. You're not just gonna have any old
body over here just because she knows how to make
you an alfredo and a taco, you know what I'm saying.
Some CALLI green, you know what I'm saying. Or because
you she folded your laundry up, she did your laundry. No,
(38:05):
you are a self sufficient man. You are going to
know how to be self sufficient because you are a
country to be the member of this household. Yes, and
people are shocked to know that BJ is a nine
year old and he knows how to wash his clothes.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
That yes, because when I went to coll and I
want to do something real quick, I hate that I
didn't teach my kids how to cook because.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
I was so in survival mode. I was so overwhelmed.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
And that's one thing that I regret because I'm a
great cooker, like people don't know, I can throw down.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I just don't like to eat.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
But it's just I hate that I missed that step
because I was so overwhelmed.
Speaker 3 (38:42):
I was going through the divorce.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
I didn't take that time, you know what I mean.
Now they know how to clean, wash the clothes, but
the cooking piece, I think over step.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
Now.
Speaker 2 (38:50):
I told y'all now at home, why are you home
from college? You can learn how to cook. If you
won't learn how to cook, then you don't eat.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
So I mean in this season, yeah, you too food.
Now the whole point you cooking caye up. Maybe somebody
don't teach you how to cut thing?
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Is he just choose to eat out. That's when you
I don't care because I'm because.
Speaker 1 (39:11):
Let me say this. I went out with a with
a man recently fifty three years old, and he said
he don't cook. I said, oh, well baby. In my
mind I didn't even have to say this on the day. Lord,
in my mind, I said, I'm not a maid or
I'm a nurse. Listen, so you say I was.
Speaker 3 (39:32):
Do you see how little things.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But LORI fifty three years old, you're talking about you
don't cook. That's first of all, you're a burden.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
Now my whole point because me that I'm going to
carry the weight of cooking.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
I don't even tell you.
Speaker 1 (39:47):
I know, you don't have a dish, you don't have
something you make a great grilled cheese and a tomato soup.
You can't do nothing.
Speaker 3 (39:54):
But see, Brandy, that's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (39:56):
When you get older, little things like that start mattering,
you know what I mean, Like if I'm sick, right,
I don't eat out a lot. I mean I don't
do fried foods and all that other stuff. So my
thing is, so what are they always say? What do
you bring it to the tape?
Speaker 3 (40:10):
What are you bringing?
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Like?
Speaker 2 (40:12):
Okay, I make my own money, so at this point,
what else can you do to enhance my life?
Speaker 1 (40:18):
We have to enjoy each other at this point, right,
So at these big ages, you know who you are,
even as a woman over forty, you know who you are,
you know what you want, you know, you know the
direction of your life, right, and so we got to
enjoy each other. But part of the enjoyment is I'm
not signing up to be your maid and your and
your and your cook every day and you, oh yeah,
(40:40):
I don't cook. Anybody who tell me they don't cook
at this big age, oh babe, were not twenty five.
You'll not cook nothing. You'll never rattle your pots, baby,
if you'll never rot in your pots, don't think Brandy
about to come over there and do it. And I
cook every day. I don't like to eat though I
like to cook and I like to eat. That's my problem.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
I don't like cooking.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
I love cooking and I and I love.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
Anything, but don't.
Speaker 2 (41:04):
Oh gosh, Now you know what's so funny when I'm dating,
because I like acts of service. I like to see
I'm a very I'm like a nurturer, right, but for
me just to do it and then like Sean didn
blew it, so he's just starting.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
I'm just not doing that.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
For Sean blew for the man that's coming.
Speaker 2 (41:23):
No, no, I'll do it for a man. But it's
just like, I don't know, I just gotta find somebody.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
I like, you gotta find somebody you like. I mean,
I think that there is someone for everyone. I mean,
but you were also, you're not gonna move you said,
you're not.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
Moving, you know what, because Atlanta's a vibe though at.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
So sexy. But I Atlanta is so sexy because.
Speaker 3 (41:50):
I live in the woods.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
Right, it's so peaceful and quiet, like my doorbell ring,
doorbell go and to be like like deer be like hey.
Speaker 3 (41:57):
Lorie, what's up? You know?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
But then I can go into this city if I
want to. I built my career here. I worked too
hard to build my career. Yeah, and I just don't
And then with the ADHD, we don't like a lot
of change.
Speaker 3 (42:10):
I don't like unpredictability.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
So so, but your person might not be in the city.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
They can move here.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
He has to be able to.
Speaker 3 (42:19):
Move or we can you can live there.
Speaker 1 (42:21):
I can live here and we can just see each other.
Speaker 3 (42:24):
Yeah, like you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (42:25):
Like it's it's a Hall movement. It's called the Lat
move and living apart but together living apart to the
LAT movement.
Speaker 2 (42:33):
I just don't want to move because see, once again
it goes back to my childhood.
Speaker 3 (42:36):
Right, I didn't have a mom and them.
Speaker 2 (42:37):
I don't want to leave Kennedy and Sean, you said,
I mean, even though they're grown, but it's the three
of us it's just us three, Like no, you know
what I mean, Like there's no aunties, no uncles, No,
you know what I mean, it's just us three.
Speaker 3 (42:50):
I would just hate to like leave.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
Them because I know the abandonment with not having a
mom or anything around.
Speaker 1 (42:58):
Yeah, but they still have I know.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
But that's something I would have to work through, Like
I'm not here. What happens if I get a phone
call on them that here? Who else are they going
to call? I can't get here. It's something that I'm
working on internally.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Yeah, And I think that things will work. I think
they might be like, look, she didn't finally.
Speaker 3 (43:16):
Gone on leave a little Kenny, be like I don't
have to do her makeup no more.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
But there's a possibility that the love that you're looking
for is not in the city terras like it's it
may not be in the city, you know. And I
think so many women, I think, and especially black women
in the city of Atlanta have to come to that
conclusion that it may not be here in this city. Yes,
(43:43):
you would, yes in a heartby internationally in the state's
coastal Baby, I will move up out of here so quick,
so fast, be like, where's she taballed.
Speaker 2 (43:55):
Not here, and you know what, the way everything is going,
I might need to move to time, and you know what,
I probably have to be more open to that. So
let me let's go back in case everybody's watching this.
I'm going to be open to move.
Speaker 1 (44:08):
Okay, Okay, Yeah, I'm open. I'm so open because I
love Atlanta like I have. I have roots here, Like
Atlanta has been so good to me. It has grown
me up. I have like grown up in Atlanta. I've
been here eighteen years. So that's a big part of
my life.
Speaker 3 (44:26):
I mean, you know, it's eighty nine yeah, oh wow.
Speaker 1 (44:28):
Yeah. So it's like I love it, but I also
know that he might he I don't think.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
I don't think. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (44:37):
I don't know if he's here, you know. So I'm open,
you know, another city, another country. It's eight billion people
in the world.
Speaker 2 (44:45):
But I want I want someone that I can share
this new life journey. Yeah, you know what, I mean,
to share all of my excitements. So when I'm doing
something like this that's on my dream book, I can
be like, guess what, and it's like, you know what.
Speaker 3 (44:57):
I mean. You have your own personal cheerleader because everybody
would say, I don't need a man. I don't need
I need a man.
Speaker 1 (45:04):
You know, Laurie, I said I need one.
Speaker 3 (45:07):
I don't know why.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
You may not know he there, but he is a
man mayor somewhere.
Speaker 3 (45:11):
Yeah, I mean, who gets pleasure in doing all this?
Speaker 2 (45:14):
But I don't want to be a superwoman. I don't
want to be a strong black woman. I don't want
to do all those things.
Speaker 3 (45:19):
I don't you know what I mean. But yeah, I
want to take off my cape. I want to be
the feminine person.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
You want to take off your cape? Want to be feminine.
What's the one thing you're looking forward to is we
begin to close out or one word you're committed to
in the season of your life?
Speaker 3 (45:34):
Intentionality?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
Intentionality.
Speaker 2 (45:37):
I want to be intentional on everything I do because
I think time and in this time and the space
in the world that we live in now, everything needs
to be intentional because you don't know what's going to
happen next. I want to be intentional with everyone that
I'm encountering. I want to be intentional with my time,
with my focus, with my energy. I want to be intentional.
Speaker 1 (45:56):
Yeah, what's the one thing that you know from this
point going forward, that you're going to be intentional about one.
Speaker 2 (46:04):
Thing, finding love, finding love, finding love and finding me finding.
Speaker 3 (46:16):
No because it was.
Speaker 1 (46:18):
A play on the book, but finding love and finding you.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Yeah, because if that's the reason I did that, because
I'm intentional about finding love and then the process of
finding me, you know what I mean, Because there's still
so many areas that I need to tap into that
I'm open to tap into because I think so many
times at my age we get center our way.
Speaker 3 (46:36):
Well, that's just the way I am.
Speaker 2 (46:38):
But if if the way that I am is not
working for me, then some adjustments need to be made.
Speaker 1 (46:42):
Yeah, some adjustments, Doctor Lorie Hanford. It has been a pleasure.
Thank you for joinings. I'm so glad we checked this
off the bucket list of things to do. The vision
board is working. Just lets you know for all those
people y'all know, we got a vision board chorus over here,
Vaught in Power, So you should go ahead and download
division board chorus. Why are you here? Because Laurie is
(47:04):
a prime example of write the vision, make it plain.
I want you to share this with somebody who needs
to be more intentional in their lives in this season
with their goals, their dreams, and even finding love. Until
next time, I'm your girl, Brandy Harvey eat Well, give
a damn move your body every single day.
Speaker 3 (47:19):
Peace,
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