July 10, 2025 • 45 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Hey, good afternoon, Welcome to another episode of Wellness and Censored.
We're here today live and wanted to share some really down,
down home just simple ways for you to start to
find ways and solutions to heal your mental health, maybe
your physical being, and to just not stress so much
(00:53):
about so many things that we can't control that are
outside to to the rest of the world. You know,
I get patients all the time, and a lot of
times what they are telling me is there's so many
things going on around them, whether they're watching social media
or they're just out with friends, and people start talking
about all kinds of different things, and before you know it,
(01:15):
they are so stressed and just can't even figure out
what it is that they're really upset about, and in
context with a lot of things. Have you ever found
yourself in a situation with someone and it's almost as
if you're thinking about a thousand different things instead of
really being present in the moment. So a lot of
what we're going to talk about today is to motivate yourself.
(01:39):
There are so many folks that I see that they'll
come in and they'll ask me, well, I have anxiety
or I have depression and I don't feel well, and
you know, I just have to feel better, and I
really get a sense they're just looking for a pill.
So sometimes I disappoint, but usually in the end, when
we kind of kind together and have common ground, they
realize that there's a little bit more involved in just
(02:01):
taking medicine. Medicine can help, and it certainly has a place,
but you really have to look at what is in
and around, what you're doing, what you're eating, are you
able to sleep, and are you taking care of your
body to get your body to move. I wanted to
take just a second and share just a couple things
that I found this week that I actually thought were
(02:21):
pretty interesting, and one of them is just sort of
a context of things that talk about words matter, and
I thought maybe it would give you some food for
thought and just something to kind of ponder on and
just think about it in maybe the most recent situations
you've been in, or maybe situations that you could have
(02:41):
handled differently or maybe just been more in the moment.
And so this is a quote from the Dali Lama.
Just one small positive thought in the morning can change
your whole day. Think about that. And I share that
because one day this week I knew, after a really
rough day before myself self care is usually going to
Orange Theory. It's a place where you work out, you run,
(03:04):
you lift, way to do all that stuff. And I
just I like that physical aspect of getting a good
endorphin release. And my day was going to get started
at nine and I couldn't do the eight thirty class
because it would have run into my first patient, and
the seven fifteen class was full. And so I did
something this week that I've never done before. I set
(03:24):
the intention to make the morning a start of my day.
And I went to bed at ten o'clock, which is
a little early for me, but I thought, if I
don't get to bed now, I know I'm going to
be too tired. And I said, and if I wake
up feeling okay, I'm going to go to the six
a m. Class. First time in my life I ever
went to an exercise class that early. But you know, what.
I woke up at five and I couldn't believe I
(03:46):
was not tired. I was ready to start the day.
And I got to the class and I had a
really good workout, and the entire day just went so well.
And I really generate that thought, the idea of I
set the intentions for the day. So I kind of
like it. You know, just one small positive thought in
the morning or one small positive action can really change
(04:08):
your whole day. And so this doesn't cost money. You
don't have to take a pill every day. It's just
how you set your intentions. And then here's a couple
other ones. The secret of attraction is to love yourself.
If you love yourself, then others might see what's really
good and genuine in you, and that may be attractive
(04:29):
to others. But if you don't feel attraction to yourself
and don't feel love self love, you know, that's where
it all begins. So many people are so self critical.
So without going on to each and every one of these,
but you know, we really do, that's where we have
to start. So we're going to talk about some toolkits
of stuff like that today. And here's another one from
Wayne Dwyer and I believe about three or four years
(04:51):
ago now, Wayne Dwyer passed, but he was a really
great inspirational person who had a lot of good books
and a lot of good things to share on self care.
And what Wayne says is with everything that has happened
to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or
treat what has happened as a gift. Either or everything
(05:12):
is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to
keep you from growing. You get to choose, and I
think that one is really most profound, because there sometimes
is a lot of tragedy and things that happen to us,
and I'm not saying that you should take the tragedy
as a gift, but in a lot of the work
that I do in helping people go through the grief process,
(05:35):
I just had someone on before I started the show
who just lost a cat of ten years. That cat
was just an instrumental part of their life and they
have a few other cats, but about nine months ago
they lost a younger cat tragically, and so this is
the second death of a fur baby in a year,
and so there's really no you know, no satisfaction, no
(05:58):
positive How do you take that but when I look
at it in terms of a gift, this happens to
be someone who does a really great job with animals,
takes them in, shelters them, sometimes homes them, to rehome them,
to get them set up for other people. And I
think it's very true. You have to take the things
that happen to you, maybe as an opportunity or a gift,
(06:19):
to propel you to do something more for yourself and
or mankind. You know, we'll talk about some of the things.
You know, I wrote a book. They call me Harriet.
We'll throw it up on the screen for you at
some point. But in that book, you know some of
the things that I experienced. There you go. You can
get it on Amazon, and you can also get it
(06:39):
on the little link code that I'm going to share
with you as well, because I've got one of those
fancy dancy scanner codes. So you can get right to
the website and you can order it and if you're
not driving, and if you've got your phone up, you
can just pop up that scanner. It goes to Pattigillianowllness
dot com and the book is there. But in the book,
you know, I challenge anybody to try to heal and
(07:03):
have the motivation. How many of you been sick? How
do you get that motivation to propel forward? So in
writing that book, it was a way for me to
document and chronologically let people know a really hard journey
for me. While it wasn't as difficult as probably other
people who have gone through probably far more difficult things,
it was so physically debilitating and mentally draining in a
(07:26):
time in our lives when we had such uncertainty and
the whole world was scared. And I thought, if I
get together and I put my thoughts down on paper
and I can write it, maybe the story that I
tell will help someone make a difference. And from the
bottom of my heart, I have actually had people share
back that by reaching out to them during the pandemic,
(07:46):
by helping them through things during the pandemic, and then
kind of fast forward now writing the book and having
other people read the book. I have a patient today
who came to me for anxiety and he's going through cancer,
and when we talked about the story my vigilance to
really stay strong, it seems to motivate him and he
now is He was in bed, now he's up in
(08:08):
a chair, he's walking around, he's still struggling, and his
prognosis is getting better. But you have to give people
a reason. You have to give people a motivator, You
have to give them a why. And sometimes we have
to find that why in ourselves. Here's the last couple
that I'd like to share. Aa Milne, the same author
who wrote Winnie the Pooh. We didn't realize we were
(08:31):
making memories. We just knew we were having fun. So
that's kind of the flip side when you go from
tragedy and loss to you're making some really amazing memories
if you take the time to just be in the
moment and have fun with other people that you want
to be with. And here's another thought for the day.
Thoughts are not facts. We don't have to take them seriously.
(08:56):
And a lot of times again, I'll have folks come
in and they think, and they think, and they overthink
and they start thinking to the point that we call
it doomsday thinking or catastrophizing things. If you have a thought,
you need to find a counter thought if it's negative,
because just because you have a thought doesn't mean something's
going to happen or going to happen to your as bad.
(09:16):
But that is that thoughts aren't facts is from Ruby Wax.
And then there are always flowers for those who want
to see them. I think at this one as take
the time to smell the beauty, smell the flowers. I
walked past somewhere the other evening and somebody had put
fresh flowers out, and the aroma filled the room and
it gave me just a pleasant, positive sense. So maybe
(09:40):
you need to fill your day with positive, pleasant living things.
And having flowers there for those who want to see
them also could be sort of an analogy for if
people want to see your garden. If people want to
celebrate in your garden, they will if they don't, it's
your garden, so you cultivate. And here's the one from
(10:01):
Graham Swift. Words were like an invisible skin and wrapping
the world and giving it a reality. And that's the
whole point about words. Words matter, Words can hurt, words
can heal, Words can make the difference of you feeling
inspired and cultivated by those around you, or words can
(10:23):
cripple you because someone could be demonstrative in a negative
way and harsh and narcissistic and enabling. And we have
to decide how we let words penetrate our skin. And
for some patients, some folks that I talk with, that's
where the healthy selfishness comes in. That's where sometimes we
have to make a choice when the words start to help.
(10:45):
You know, take a paper cut to your whole body
and before you know it, you're hemorrhaging. You've got to
stop the hemorrhage and go, oh, you know what, I'm sorry,
I forgot to have an appointment. Oh my phone's ringing.
I forgot I'm a contractor. Oh you know what, it
was great seeing you, but I've got to run. You
have got to put a barrier between you and the
paper cut, or before you know it, the paper cut's
(11:07):
going to need some stitches. And that's where healthy selfishness
and only letting words pattern in a way that they're
going to help you grow and thrive like a flower.
Ralph Waldo Emerson shares, write it on your heart that
every day is your best day in the year, and
that's a big one. How do you write it on
(11:27):
your heart? And that's where we take each day with
gratitude and see, these are all things just in the
last ten minutes of what I've been sharing with you.
How are we filling your cup? Do you feel a
little more inspired? Do you feel a little more positive?
Do you feel like you know what? Maybe today is
going to be a better day. Maybe tonight I have
something to look forward to. Maybe this weekend coming up.
(11:49):
Tomorrow's my Friday, and everybody feels better on a Friday.
I don't know what it is, but like starting the
week over, it's like groundhog Day. People get the Sunday
scaries and we have to work through. Way is to
cultivate a positive thought for Monday mornings, but you know
tomorrow's Friday. Write it on your heart that every day
is the best day. And if I remember to tell y'all,
(12:10):
I'll just tell y'all now. One of the ways to
start exercising and staying with it, someone shared with me,
don't ever miss your workout today. So if you've committed
to it and you're going to go, go, But if
you don't feel like going, tell yourself, I'm going to
go today. I'll think about tomorrow. Maybe I won't go tomorrow,
but I'm going to go today. What happens tomorrow comes
(12:34):
and if you follow the Dame truth, Oh, I can't
not go today. But maybe I'll take off tomorrow. And
it's just kind of a little game we play with ourselves,
but it's a great way to really try to get
a mindset of healing. And here's the last one. When
you come out of the storm, you won't be the
same person who walked in. That is what the storm
(12:57):
is all about. And we're all going to go through storm,
but we can't live in the storm. A storm passes.
We just have to decide when we want that storm
to pass. So one of the things to get really
in tune with cultivating your new norm or your new
self or how to get yourself motivated is a process.
What we do in psychiatry is motivational thinking. It's a technique,
(13:21):
it's a process, and it's about setting up your intentions,
setting up your plans, setting up goals, and it's stopping
yourself from thinking about the negatives and only propelling forward
with what's next, what do I need to do? What
are my goals? And then how to look at your
goals and kind of go forward. And in looking at
your goals do we often sometimes find that we think,
(13:43):
but we don't have enough time. If I say I'm
going to go to the gym. I'm going to be sore.
I'm afraid. I'm afraid to go forward. We have to
get out of the way of your goal. And making
a goal doesn't mean you have to hit the target.
It just means you have to go to the target.
So the only way we're going to get you to
go forward is you got to start with some goals.
(14:05):
And I always tell folks, don't make a list of ten,
start with two. If you feel like you've got to
make a list, make five, but make sure that you
hit one or two each day and then build to
the third one. And have you ever thought about, well,
I'm going to do it, but you know, we'll wait
and see. And it's more of an ambivalence. You know,
(14:26):
you get to control you, You get to decide what
you do. In what we share here today and what
I share with most patients is I can't do the
work for you. I can only help you to get
the success to get there. It has to be a
conscious choice on your part. And if you if you
start something and you're not succeeding at it, it doesn't
(14:46):
mean you have to get the whole ball of wax
going again. Just keep moving forward. You know a lot
of times people will say things like, well, that's interesting,
but I don't have time. You know, I'm good with exercising,
but I've got to work on my diet it first. Well,
I don't know, why can't you do both? Why does
one have to come before the other? You know, I
(15:07):
really want to do something, but I just I don't
have the time. Now is not a good time. All
those are is ambivalents, those are excuses in all of
the cases of this, though, You've got to start somewhere.
I often talk about self talk, and self talk can
be very effective, especially if we've done the negative self talk,
(15:28):
you know what I'm talking about, and so we can
talk ourselves out of anything. Doesn't it seem like that?
But how do you talk yourself into something? And that's
where you have to be good to yourself. You have
to give yourself grace, You have to give yourself understanding,
and you have to reward yourself, compliment yourself and recognize, hey,
(15:49):
I'm not doing too bad. Kelly's asking as if you
do something that can't seem to finish it, when do
you call it quit? Well, I guess hens really what
it is? You know, if it's if it's a product
you start and say, I have patients sometimes they always
they get into some good hobbies, but before you know it,
(16:11):
their house becomes hobbyland, like hobby lobby, and they've got
a bunch of unfinished projects. I think if it's so
unmanageable that it gets in your way of going forward,
it might be time to just cut the cord and
start fresh. And if it's not a physical hobby, but
(16:32):
it's something like we were just talking about. You know,
I want to exercise, but I got to get my
nutrition or my diet in line first. Why not start
both because one kind of fuels the other. You know,
exercise is motivating and you feel good nutrition, you'll be
more motivated to eat the right foods because you just
spent the morning working out. Like for me, if I
(16:53):
put in a good workout. We went to class last
night because I couldn't fit in Orange Theory during the
day yesterday, so I was able to squeeze out the
last class of the night. And after I got done running,
you know, we wanted to go out and eat. You know,
I ate very well. I ate a really good burger.
I put a let us wrap around it took the
bun off, and I felt good about that because I
(17:15):
felt like I enhanced my workout. I didn't defeat it.
Now if I had oh and I got a salad,
So if I had gotten the fries and I had
used the bun it was kind of a half hearted effort.
I did get some good protein. But we have to
start thinking smarter so we don't have to work harder.
And if there's something that you've started that's more tangible
(17:38):
or more of a longer term project, I would say
this is where writing down your goals and putting things
on paper in a journal really makes a huge difference.
When you start putting energy behind it, other than just
having thoughts about it, you're going to have to follow Oh,
I wrote this down. Sometimes I'll write things on scrap paper,
(17:59):
and when I save them and I pull out some
of the scrappaper, I'm like, I got to do this.
I forgot about that. I got to finish this. So
I try to always keep it organized in a book,
but write down. If it's a product that you just
can't seem to finish, or something that you just can't
seem to get going, then think about how important is
it really You know one of my better examples. I
(18:20):
don't know if it's better, but you know, there's lower
priority things in my life right now because there's things
that I just I have to do right I can't
say no to a patient, so my schedule is always packed.
I have to make time for working on some different things,
either my podcast or I do a trauma support group.
But let's just say I have some pictures that I
have lined up where I want to hang them. I've
(18:41):
got most of them hung, but there's a few that
I haven't found quite the right spot for and they've
probably been here now for we're pushing two years. It's
just low on the list. I could clean them up
and put them away, but I really want to hang them.
So that's one example of you have to make a decision.
Is it worth letting them sit they're looking like they
belong on the wall but they're on the floor, or
(19:03):
do you just move to another place so that the
room looks cleaner. So, just depending on the project, hopefully
that will help you. Now it's something that is in
my wheelhouse about exercise or nutrition. I will tell you,
don't worry about what you had to eat this morning,
don't worry that you got up late and you're starting
the daily What can you do to start eating better today?
(19:25):
Or can you go to the gym? Can you go
take a walk today? So it's really not a matter
of defining the timeline, you know, morning night, starting this month,
starting next month, I'll start on a Monday. But get
the timeline, just get it started and then write things down,
use a calendar, use whatever works best for you. But
(19:45):
if you don't put it is a visual on paper
or on your phone or journal, you're not probably going
to follow through. And that's where self talk really comes in.
It becomes very important, you know, and thinking about if
you're going to journal. Here's a couple of examples. You
can say these things to yourself. You can pick the
topic that you want. But the idea about exercising, you know, well,
(20:08):
it helps me burn extra calories, it does improve my
heart health. I feel better physically and mentally, and I
do sleep better at night. Some of the cons well,
I'll be less tired, so maybe I'll have trouble sleeping. Oh,
if I don't exercise, it could increase my risks of
having heart problems. And by not exercising it may make
(20:29):
it harder to keep up with people and friends and
activities because a lot of people are very into taking
care of themselves and you don't want to be ten
years behind the group. If you're forty and you're walking
like you're fifty, you know, maybe you need to invest
in some cardiovascular training. But self talk is the same thing,
and even to the point of you know you can't
(20:52):
seem to finish it, do some self talk on your project.
How many positives do you have and how many negatives
do you have? If you don't finish the project? And
usually whateveryone has the higher list of pros and cons
is the one that's going to win out or should
win out. And that's kind of how I go with
it and making a plan. You know, the goal is
to overcome barriers to yourself. You know, think about making
(21:16):
a list or making buckets and use the buckets for
what are your concerns? You know, give your brain some
self evaluation. You know, my concerns? Are they physical health issues?
Are they work issues? Do I have relationship concerns? Am
I worried about my social life? Am I worried about money?
(21:36):
Am I worried about spirituality? And my spiritual health. Am
I worried about legal trouble? Am I worried about my emotions?
Do I have a problem with drugs or alcohol defining
my sexuality relationships? I think you talked about. So identify
your areas of concern and then rank them, and if
(21:56):
you've got nine or ten things, start working on the
top one, maybe the top two, because they could go
hand in hand, like diet and exercise. I really wouldn't
start one without the other. I would start them both
together because one will enhance the other one. And after
you rate your concerns those other three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine concerns, save them for when you're really underway and
(22:20):
you've got things rolling. To bring one of those up
and start working on that one. And kind of keep
your concerns as a you know, as an active task list,
but start the priority and then kind of write the
reasons down. I always like asking this question and motivational therapy,
and it kind of leaves it wide open. We call
it a miracle question. But if you had a magic
(22:41):
wand and we could solve all your problems overnight, what
would your life look like the next morning? What would
be different? And know that this is your ultimate goal,
that's your big picture. And it's great to have your
miracle question and describe it, because that's what I would
put at the top of my my whiteboard, or if
(23:02):
I was going to do affirmations throughout my house, maybe
write it to the front cover of your journal. But
it's knowing, like, what is the ultimate ideal if you
could wave a wand and solve all of these problems
and concerns that stress you, what would your life look
like tomorrow morning? And then just write a little paragraph
about it and put that on the front of your journal,
(23:23):
put that on your refrigerator, and use that as an
inspirational goal to target all the areas of concern that
you want to tackle. And maybe you have other thoughts
and questions, like you think about your miracle question, what
do you think would make your life better? You know,
sometimes people always want to look and find the greener grass.
Is it really greener? When you get to the greener side,
(23:45):
it's not always so green. It's got a little yellow
in there, it may even have a dry patch. But
once you hit that other side, Say you look at
somebody else's life and go, you know, they seem to
have it all when you really look inside, they have
other issue choose. It's just how they deal with them
or how maybe they don't share things and you don't
know some of the things they're struggling with. So think
(24:07):
about that. You may lift some things out thinking well,
my life would be better if and write it down.
And then if you think that's so, maybe you could say,
my life would be better if I would exercise, My
life would be better if I made more money, My
life would be better if I ate less carbohydrates, or
my life would be better if I didn't have to
(24:28):
worry about everybody taking every ounce of energy from me.
And my mom's so a draining, my sister's so annoying,
my husband, you go down the list. So if you
think your life would be better, then you have to
address those issues, not to get rid of the people
in your life, but to address how do you turn
those negatives into something that works for you. And we
(24:51):
can talk more about that, you know, lifting out your
goals we kind of mentioned and really specifically mirroring the
goals you know, and say, I want to lose weight,
but what does that mean? I want to lose five pounds?
I want to lose twenty five pounds. I want to
lose fifty pounds, and then what steps do you want
to take to get there? You know, if I want
to lose weight, thinking about it and looking at my
(25:13):
fridge or stepping on the scale isn't going to do
a whole lot. But setting a goal of I want
to lose fifteen pounds, and you make a plan of
which days of the week and what times you're going
to go exercise, and you know, sometimes the best way
to start a new exercise routine is try something you
haven't done before. If you have weights or a gym
(25:34):
in your house and you're not using it, chances are
you're not going to start. But if you go try
a new class, maybe a pilates class or a yoga class,
it's going to inspire some creativity and maybe you'll come
home and go. You know, I think, one day a week,
I'm going to do the gym here, and then I'm
going to sign up for the yoga class. The good
thing about that is you create a little diversity to
(25:54):
your exercise and it becomes more fun. I think several
times I've shared with you all the way I converted
having to work out versus wanting to work out is
I treat it as my recess, and I really love recess.
I love fun, I love activity. I love doing things
because I want to do them. So having to go
(26:15):
work out sometimes wasn't a lot of fun. Even the
chore of getting on treadmill. You know, my goal was,
I'm just gonna make it to a mile. Now I run.
I run as fast and as far as I can
to get to the fastest, the farthest spot on the
treadmill during class last night. I ran five miles today.
It was a shorter class than I only did three
point one. But you have to make it a fun goal.
(26:38):
And if you have not run or walked in a while,
it's ridiculous to try to say I'm going to get
to five miles. That did not happen overnight. It took years.
But when you start to accomplish I'm going to get
to a mile, and then you get to a mile
and you're going to go, I'm going to get to
one point five, that's huge. And you can do it
walking and you can just speed up your time. If
(27:00):
you don't like to run, or you've got you know,
knees or hip or any kind of issues that you
can't run, that's fine, and running commute, in my opinion, boring.
So if I don't have the right music, it makes
it harder for me to run. So we've got to
find all the little intricacies that are going to make
these activities enjoyable for you. And I go back to
the beginning where we start out with. You know, one
(27:22):
small positive thought to do something in the morning can
set the tone for the whole day, beyond the thoughts
and beyond the notes. Now you've got to take action.
And how are you going to take action? Because we're talking,
but we're not walking. So how are you going to
take action? A lot of folks, you're going to need
to have to put it on your calendar, you know.
But I have work, and I have kids, and I
(27:42):
have class and I don't have time. Well, as much
as I didn't want to get up early, I even
did something new this year this week and I got
up and I did a six am class. I can't
tell you that I will do it again, but at
least I know I can. And I got my work
out in because work wasn't going to get in my
way home. Life wasn't going to get in my way.
(28:03):
You know, class work wasn't going to get in my way.
Nothing was going to get in my way. Traffic got
a little bit in my way, but at six am,
there's not much traffic because I was actually on the
road at five point thirty. So you know, the other
part of all this, too is change. And that's where
I think people come into the hardest, hardest part of
all this is it sounds good, I'm going to write
it down. How do we create the change and keep it?
(28:25):
So it's just going to take time, and it's a mindset.
You know, when you start seeing things, when you start
seeing the benefits and you start seeing the change, that's
where you really start to stick. But emotional change is hard,
especially when you are not the only one in the
driver of your situation. And I say that because how
(28:47):
many of you have someone else or some others that
are dependent on you, and your responsibilities are to each
and every person, your kids, your spouse, your older parents,
a debilitated sister, you name it. In those cases, it's
really difficult sometimes to divide your time and be focused.
(29:07):
But here's the thing, and you've heard me say this before,
it's just like flying on an airplane. They teach you
so that if you ever encounter the emergency, you're going
to have the muscle memory with the mask on yourself first.
Then you can help everybody else. If you're saving someone
in the water, you generally try to throw the raft
(29:28):
out to them, the little bowie before you jump out
to them, or you bring the buoy out, the little
life raft out with you because if they grab onto
you and your neck, you can hold onto the life
raft because now you've got to save yourself. And then
so you have to carve out five, ten, fifteen, twenty
thirty sixty minutes in a day for you. And I'm
(29:50):
not going to say it's not hard, and I know
sometimes you're tired, but when you start doing it day
after day, then you get to look back in that
rear view mirror and go, wow, I did more than
I thought I could do these two weeks. And then
you go forward, you close up the rear view mirror,
don't look back, and you go another two weeks, and
before you know it, you will have built a habit.
(30:10):
And it does take about twenty one days. Some people
it's a little tougher, but you have to be able
to have it now. Change can affect us in many ways.
You know, there's social change, which means you may need
to extend yourself out more. It may mean you need
to be more social with people and that may not
be fun. Or you may need to pull back from
all of your social activity to try to be a
(30:33):
little less social so you get your priority straight. And
then there's spiritual thoughts. Spiritual change. You know, all these
factors go into our persona that can either help us
or hinder us to move forward. So you've got to
think of all those aspects. And then there's financial you know,
not everybody can afford to join a gym, not everybody
(30:54):
can afford to join a class, So you know, what
do you need to do and how do you prioritize that?
All those things make it really, you know, kind of tricky,
but here's the thing, it's your life. You get one
shot at it. I think some of these folks who've
given us these one lines of words matter, you know,
from the Dali Lama to Wayne Dwyer and Deepak Chopra,
(31:16):
even a aamiln Ralph Waldo Emerson. I mean, these are
wonderful philosophical people who have had a broad brush, a
broad view in life, and there's a message behind it. Right,
let's take the messages for today and make our tomorrow better.
If you are really kind of stuck and you do
(31:38):
have limitations that don't allow you to, you know, have
the financial ability to try new things, don't let the
financial piece be a barrier. It does not cost money
to go walk. It does not cost money to get
protein powder versus doritos. So you know, I think dorito's
maybe even more pricing now than buying pro ten powder
(32:00):
and a couple of water bottles. So, as one of
our viewers has said, it's absolutely right. It sacrifices. You
got to pick your poison and if you want to
feel better, if you want to change, it doesn't always
mean relying on a pill. Now, let me kind of
give you a little bit of that, because in talking
about psychiatry and psychology and how can people help to
(32:22):
get better, I fully believe that sometimes we need a
lift to get us there. And some folks have gone
through so many different things. Whether you're just an anxious person,
You've been anxious your whole life, whether you suffer and
struggle from not enough serotonin produced in your brain because
we haven't gotten you to get physically active yet. Whether
you're someone who's gone through personal tragedies, some of those
(32:44):
tragedies can be pretty significant utilizing a really good lift
of typically an antidepressant, either an SSRI or an SNRI.
One of my favorites generally is well Beutrim, but there's
a lot of other good ones, and they all do
slightly different things. But if you want to get yourself
in the right mindset, it's not a bad idea to
(33:05):
reach out to a professional, you know. That's why I
do what I do. That's where I've learned so many
great success stories from people because I've not only been
able to test it and try it on them, but
these are things that I've utilized myself in my own
personal journey, having overcome some you know, trauma and tragedy
and all kinds of stuff. You know, it's part of life.
(33:26):
It's how you look at it and how you overcome it.
So I do want to give, you know, an energetic
plug to all the therapists that we have out there.
All the psychiatrists and psychologists are psychners, practitioners. They're there
for you to get you to be your best self.
But like a few people that will come into my
office each week and they just come in and want
(33:47):
me to fix them. I can't fix them without their help.
And they have to be engaged, you know. I mean,
I can write a prescription, but you got to take it.
And I'll even have folks that's kind of you know,
It's funny you come into a professional who's trained and
knows how to provide the best suggestions for medications, and
they'll take one of these pills for a day and go, oh,
(34:09):
I can't take it. It made me tired. I stopped
taking it. And you know I usually set them out
on a two week appointment, So I'm going so for
the last two weeks, what have you been doing? You
stop the pill? Are you working out? Are you walking?
Have you changed your diet? How's your sleep going? So
they just wasted two weeks. So generally your provider's going
to give you side effects to worry about. But many
(34:30):
of these medications, until they're on board in your system,
you're going to need to take them for a few weeks.
Now again ruling out the side effects when you take them.
Most of them take that long to get enough of
a level up in your brain so that you feel better.
So keep that in mind. And your provider probably has
a pretty good idea of what you need, so work
(34:50):
with them. Don't go into the office and expect it's
not working. What are you going to do now, I'm
not going to do anything. What are you going to
do now? I'm going to give you suggestions and I'm
going to give you really good things that are going
to help you. But we've got to work together. And
if I do my part to kind of set a plan,
just like we're doing here, you know you're going to
be the one right You, guys are going to go
(35:11):
make a list of things that are positive negative. You're
going to make a list of your top three goals.
You're going to look at your areas of growth and
goals and see what really makes the most sense for
you to focus on. And you're going to clean out
your closet. You're going to take away some negative thinking.
You're going to take away some negative people that maybe
I'm hearing the chimes and I don't know what it is.
Can you guys hear that? It must be something that's
(35:33):
set in the house. It's not a doorbell, it's so weird.
But I digress because it's just like China in my
ear and there's no chimes in here, so I don't
know what it is. But anyway, if you can't hear it,
it's just and I know I'm not hearing things, So
no delusions. But you've got to really take your own
mindset and then ask for help get the help going forward,
(35:55):
because sometimes it's hard to do this stuff alone. Let
me also give a quick shout out to my friends
at Hearty Nutritionals too, because while I don't have my
protein drink in hand or my bottle party Nutritionals, the
daily Essential nutrients are a fabulous way to really boost
your immune system as well as your energy. And if
you go onto hardnutritionals dot com. Oh, it's at the
(36:18):
bottom of our page too, hardnutritionals dot dot com. If
you pick one thing, let's just start with one thing
and I can get you guys started on this. Pick
one thing, the essential nutrients, the daily essentials. It's daily
essential nutrients. It's around fifty five dollars. I think for
the powder you can get capsules, but the daily essential
nutrients are going to energize you, give you focus, help
(36:40):
you feel really good. I use these to help people
get off of many of the medications that they find habit.
For me, it's a great way to really just improve
your overall physical health and it just it goes a
long way. So when you do find what you want
when you check out, because I'm one of the providers
on their site, just type in Magnolia and the product
(37:02):
code and it will give you fifteen percent off. And
they'll also do free consultations with my patients. So if
you want a free consult when they send you the
check out, there's a link and they'll talk to you
about some of the clinical applications, especially if you are
someone who wants to tight trade off of some of
your medications, especially some of the more heavy duty ones.
(37:24):
This product bar none is the best that I've ever seen.
I've had Doctor Hardy's son on my show I think
back last September October, So if you want to see
that show, you can take a look on iHeartRadio and
type in wellness and censored with PATTYG and you can
see all the prior shows out of lance And don't
(37:44):
forget if you need any information from me, use my
product scanner that we have there. Just put your phone
over it and the link will come up and you'll
be able to pull up my books. You'll be able
to pull up how to access me if you have questions.
I've even got a link for different supplements if you
need be complex, nad A AC. These are all the
(38:04):
things that I take myself and in the vitamin cabinet
that I have there on the web page. I give
everybody twenty percent off, so you're third party tested. They're
the most pure products. They're not something you're going to
find on the Walmart shelf. You know, no slant to Walmart,
but you know, if you get something cheap, there's usually
a lot of fillers. So definitely definitely look into that.
(38:29):
And oh, somebody's sending a positive note. I appreciate that.
I didn't realize. Okay, I appreciate the connection there. Yeah,
you guys can send this to anybody you want. Right now.
We're live, and I think there's a way to share,
so if you want to share the podcast anybody. But
this show and many of our shows are good not
(38:51):
just for today, not just in the moment, but they
can really create a toolkit for you of success. It's
like free therapy and free counseling, and if you go
back to the prior shows and even this one, there's
a lot of good stuff that we have on there
to help you be your best self. And you know,
while I'm going to touch on this and then I'm
going to share a little more. But thinking assertively, do
(39:12):
you all know what that means? Thinking assertively, I mean
to kind of state the obvious, I would think, But
do you really need approval to think the best of yourself?
Do you need to worry about hurting someone else's feelings?
Do you think it's selfish to ask for things that
you want? And do you believe that you know you're
(39:33):
going to cause a problem or a scene if you
set boundaries? And those are the important things when we
talk about self care, care and dealing with other people
who may affect your life negatively, either as a narcissist,
as a victim, as someone who just maybe the other
person or people in your life don't have boundaries. If
you don't start to set boundaries and start thinking assertively,
(39:54):
people will walk all over you and then you lose
a little piece of yourself each day, each week, each month,
and before you know it, you come to a crossroads.
And a barrier that do you really know who you are?
What is it that you really believe in, What is
that that inspires you? What are you all about? So
you know, think assertively and why that's so important. I
(40:15):
was thinking about, you know, a lot of the things
that have been going on in the world today, and
we really do have to turn it off. Turn off
the social media, turn off some of the news, turn
off some of the noise. If you do so for
two weeks, I promise you it's all still going to
be there. And while there may be some new stuff,
you have given yourself two weeks to heal and repair
(40:37):
and focus on you. I want you to start thinking
assertively for yourself. What really is going to affect you
in the most positive way? Okay? And when you think
about that, here's just a couple of things to think
about in terms of you and your values. Everybody's got
different thoughts, different values, different beliefs. But you know, I'm
going to read you a list, and by reading it,
(40:59):
if you get to rewatch this show and you want
to write it down, you can. But what are your
values in terms of achievement, caring, commitment, creativity, duty, excitement, family, fitness,
for giving, freedom, friendship. What are your values for gratitude, growth, help, hope, humor, integrity?
(41:22):
What are your values for knowledge and for love? What
are your values for providing? For peace, for responsibility, for
self acceptance, for traditional and for tolerance? And just think
about those words. You know, what are your values? And
somewhere in there is a value for self? Right? It
has to be otherwise you get lost with other thoughts
(41:44):
and emotions. My goodness, I can't believe we're like nearing
the end of the show today and I'm only halfway through.
So we may have to have a follow up here
so I can get through some of the other things.
But you know, pay close attention to your values and
know that you've got to kind of figure out for yourself.
You know what's the what, when, where? And your thoughts
and feelings that are going to drive you and if
(42:05):
you know, you know what was, what's helpful to you,
what's supportive for you? That's the who try to bring
those people into your life. Who else can you partner with?
Who else can you go to the gym with? You know?
Who else can you get into a meal plan with?
Right and starting to eat healthy? What time of day
is best for you, what season is best for you.
I always say there's no time like the present. And
(42:26):
then where are you and what's happening in your life?
In your situation? Can you really start some goals today
or do you have to clear some things out? Like
our first caller had questions like what if you can't
finish it, maybe it's time to cut the cord and
start something new. And then what are your thoughts and
feelings you know of your time and the things that
you're thinking about. If you're really stressed by all this,
(42:49):
maybe now is not the time. But if you're really
ready to make a change, I always say there's no
time like the present. With a lot of the stuff,
we can recognize mistakes from the past, and so how
do we not make those same mistakes going forward. That's
why I always say it's important to get someone to
help you along the way. You know, podcast books, self help,
(43:09):
these types of interactions, these are all toolkits to help you.
But if you are struggling or suffering and you have
just not gotten to the point where you're making a
change or a difference in your life, and you feel
thoughts of sadness, empty, angst, lonely, worry, panic, fear, insomnia,
inability to eat, inability to fall asleep, you wake up
(43:31):
a couple of times during the night. Go get a
mental health assessment, see what's going on. Maybe you need
just some weekly or bi monthly talk therapy help you
with some of the intentions that we've set here for
you to try to get started with. There's just so
much more, you know, for taking some steps forward. I
just wanted to make sure we touched on getting an
(43:53):
exercise routine, going look at your diet, find ways to
reduce stress and prove your sleep, spend some time with friends,
and get more physical in your day. But for now,
you know, let's kind of leave you with some of
these things. You know, self care matters, you matter, and
at wellness uncensored. Our goal is to take people forward
so that we never live in fear or panic. The
(44:15):
whole reason we started this show is because of the
four years of just misinformation, fear, pandemonium, and lies, and
people like myself were basically taped and gagged to speak
out and fight against things that didn't make sense. You'll
find lots more in some of the shows that are
on iHeartRadio if you want to hear about some of
the deeper, darker sides that have gone on in the
(44:36):
last four years. My book, they call me Harriet. You're
going to read some things that may actually curl your hair.
So I encourage you to get that book and know
that there's people out here like myself that have had
a lot of history and experience and speaking the truth
and really wanting to take care of you to make
you your best self. And that's why we're here today.
Next week I may have someone on who wrote a
(44:58):
book on vaccine injuries some of the misinformation. But if
I'm not able to have her on next week, will
certainly have her in the coming week, so be looking
forward to that, and we'll certainly finish up with some
motivational work and ways to get you to be your
best self. I'm so excited you guys tuned in today.
Please share this with others, jump on my link. I
encourage to learn and want to dig deeper for good information,
(45:20):
Stay true to yourself, turn off the chatter, try to
cut down on social media. Have a great rest of
your week and a wonderful weekend, and I will see
you next Thursday at three pm. Eastern have a great day.
Any health related information on the following show provides general
information only. Content presented on any show by any host
or guests should not be substituted for a doctor's advice.
Always consult your physician before beginning any new diet, exercise,
or treatment program.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Hey, good afternoon, Welcome to another episode of Wellness and Censored.
We're here today live and wanted to share some really down,
down home just simple ways for you to start to
find ways and solutions to heal your mental health, maybe
your physical being, and to just not stress so much
(00:53):
about so many things that we can't control that are
outside to to the rest of the world. You know,
I get patients all the time, and a lot of
times what they are telling me is there's so many
things going on around them, whether they're watching social media
or they're just out with friends, and people start talking
about all kinds of different things, and before you know it,
(01:15):
they are so stressed and just can't even figure out
what it is that they're really upset about, and in
context with a lot of things. Have you ever found
yourself in a situation with someone and it's almost as
if you're thinking about a thousand different things instead of
really being present in the moment. So a lot of
what we're going to talk about today is to motivate yourself.
(01:39):
There are so many folks that I see that they'll
come in and they'll ask me, well, I have anxiety
or I have depression and I don't feel well, and
you know, I just have to feel better, and I
really get a sense they're just looking for a pill.
So sometimes I disappoint, but usually in the end, when
we kind of kind together and have common ground, they
realize that there's a little bit more involved in just
(02:01):
taking medicine. Medicine can help, and it certainly has a place,
but you really have to look at what is in
and around, what you're doing, what you're eating, are you
able to sleep, and are you taking care of your
body to get your body to move. I wanted to
take just a second and share just a couple things
that I found this week that I actually thought were
(02:21):
pretty interesting, and one of them is just sort of
a context of things that talk about words matter, and
I thought maybe it would give you some food for
thought and just something to kind of ponder on and
just think about it in maybe the most recent situations
you've been in, or maybe situations that you could have
(02:41):
handled differently or maybe just been more in the moment.
And so this is a quote from the Dali Lama.
Just one small positive thought in the morning can change
your whole day. Think about that. And I share that
because one day this week I knew, after a really
rough day before myself self care is usually going to
Orange Theory. It's a place where you work out, you run,
(03:04):
you lift, way to do all that stuff. And I
just I like that physical aspect of getting a good
endorphin release. And my day was going to get started
at nine and I couldn't do the eight thirty class
because it would have run into my first patient, and
the seven fifteen class was full. And so I did
something this week that I've never done before. I set
(03:24):
the intention to make the morning a start of my day.
And I went to bed at ten o'clock, which is
a little early for me, but I thought, if I
don't get to bed now, I know I'm going to
be too tired. And I said, and if I wake
up feeling okay, I'm going to go to the six
a m. Class. First time in my life I ever
went to an exercise class that early. But you know, what.
I woke up at five and I couldn't believe I
(03:46):
was not tired. I was ready to start the day.
And I got to the class and I had a
really good workout, and the entire day just went so well.
And I really generate that thought, the idea of I
set the intentions for the day. So I kind of
like it. You know, just one small positive thought in
the morning or one small positive action can really change
(04:08):
your whole day. And so this doesn't cost money. You
don't have to take a pill every day. It's just
how you set your intentions. And then here's a couple
other ones. The secret of attraction is to love yourself.
If you love yourself, then others might see what's really
good and genuine in you, and that may be attractive
(04:29):
to others. But if you don't feel attraction to yourself
and don't feel love self love, you know, that's where
it all begins. So many people are so self critical.
So without going on to each and every one of these,
but you know, we really do, that's where we have
to start. So we're going to talk about some toolkits
of stuff like that today. And here's another one from
Wayne Dwyer and I believe about three or four years
(04:51):
ago now, Wayne Dwyer passed, but he was a really
great inspirational person who had a lot of good books
and a lot of good things to share on self care.
And what Wayne says is with everything that has happened
to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or
treat what has happened as a gift. Either or everything
(05:12):
is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to
keep you from growing. You get to choose, and I
think that one is really most profound, because there sometimes
is a lot of tragedy and things that happen to us,
and I'm not saying that you should take the tragedy
as a gift, but in a lot of the work
that I do in helping people go through the grief process,
(05:35):
I just had someone on before I started the show
who just lost a cat of ten years. That cat
was just an instrumental part of their life and they
have a few other cats, but about nine months ago
they lost a younger cat tragically, and so this is
the second death of a fur baby in a year,
and so there's really no you know, no satisfaction, no
(05:58):
positive How do you take that but when I look
at it in terms of a gift, this happens to
be someone who does a really great job with animals,
takes them in, shelters them, sometimes homes them, to rehome them,
to get them set up for other people. And I
think it's very true. You have to take the things
that happen to you, maybe as an opportunity or a gift,
(06:19):
to propel you to do something more for yourself and
or mankind. You know, we'll talk about some of the things.
You know, I wrote a book. They call me Harriet.
We'll throw it up on the screen for you at
some point. But in that book, you know some of
the things that I experienced. There you go. You can
get it on Amazon, and you can also get it
(06:39):
on the little link code that I'm going to share
with you as well, because I've got one of those
fancy dancy scanner codes. So you can get right to
the website and you can order it and if you're
not driving, and if you've got your phone up, you
can just pop up that scanner. It goes to Pattigillianowllness
dot com and the book is there. But in the book,
you know, I challenge anybody to try to heal and
(07:03):
have the motivation. How many of you been sick? How
do you get that motivation to propel forward? So in
writing that book, it was a way for me to
document and chronologically let people know a really hard journey
for me. While it wasn't as difficult as probably other
people who have gone through probably far more difficult things,
it was so physically debilitating and mentally draining in a
(07:26):
time in our lives when we had such uncertainty and
the whole world was scared. And I thought, if I
get together and I put my thoughts down on paper
and I can write it, maybe the story that I
tell will help someone make a difference. And from the
bottom of my heart, I have actually had people share
back that by reaching out to them during the pandemic,
(07:46):
by helping them through things during the pandemic, and then
kind of fast forward now writing the book and having
other people read the book. I have a patient today
who came to me for anxiety and he's going through cancer,
and when we talked about the story my vigilance to
really stay strong, it seems to motivate him and he
now is He was in bed, now he's up in
(08:08):
a chair, he's walking around, he's still struggling, and his
prognosis is getting better. But you have to give people
a reason. You have to give people a motivator, You
have to give them a why. And sometimes we have
to find that why in ourselves. Here's the last couple
that I'd like to share. Aa Milne, the same author
who wrote Winnie the Pooh. We didn't realize we were
(08:31):
making memories. We just knew we were having fun. So
that's kind of the flip side when you go from
tragedy and loss to you're making some really amazing memories
if you take the time to just be in the
moment and have fun with other people that you want
to be with. And here's another thought for the day.
Thoughts are not facts. We don't have to take them seriously.
(08:56):
And a lot of times again, I'll have folks come
in and they think, and they think, and they overthink
and they start thinking to the point that we call
it doomsday thinking or catastrophizing things. If you have a thought,
you need to find a counter thought if it's negative,
because just because you have a thought doesn't mean something's
going to happen or going to happen to your as bad.
(09:16):
But that is that thoughts aren't facts is from Ruby Wax.
And then there are always flowers for those who want
to see them. I think at this one as take
the time to smell the beauty, smell the flowers. I
walked past somewhere the other evening and somebody had put
fresh flowers out, and the aroma filled the room and
it gave me just a pleasant, positive sense. So maybe
(09:40):
you need to fill your day with positive, pleasant living things.
And having flowers there for those who want to see
them also could be sort of an analogy for if
people want to see your garden. If people want to
celebrate in your garden, they will if they don't, it's
your garden, so you cultivate. And here's the one from
(10:01):
Graham Swift. Words were like an invisible skin and wrapping
the world and giving it a reality. And that's the
whole point about words. Words matter, Words can hurt, words
can heal, Words can make the difference of you feeling
inspired and cultivated by those around you, or words can
(10:23):
cripple you because someone could be demonstrative in a negative
way and harsh and narcissistic and enabling. And we have
to decide how we let words penetrate our skin. And
for some patients, some folks that I talk with, that's
where the healthy selfishness comes in. That's where sometimes we
have to make a choice when the words start to help.
(10:45):
You know, take a paper cut to your whole body
and before you know it, you're hemorrhaging. You've got to
stop the hemorrhage and go, oh, you know what, I'm sorry,
I forgot to have an appointment. Oh my phone's ringing.
I forgot I'm a contractor. Oh you know what, it
was great seeing you, but I've got to run. You
have got to put a barrier between you and the
paper cut, or before you know it, the paper cut's
(11:07):
going to need some stitches. And that's where healthy selfishness
and only letting words pattern in a way that they're
going to help you grow and thrive like a flower.
Ralph Waldo Emerson shares, write it on your heart that
every day is your best day in the year, and
that's a big one. How do you write it on
(11:27):
your heart? And that's where we take each day with
gratitude and see, these are all things just in the
last ten minutes of what I've been sharing with you.
How are we filling your cup? Do you feel a
little more inspired? Do you feel a little more positive?
Do you feel like you know what? Maybe today is
going to be a better day. Maybe tonight I have
something to look forward to. Maybe this weekend coming up.
(11:49):
Tomorrow's my Friday, and everybody feels better on a Friday.
I don't know what it is, but like starting the
week over, it's like groundhog Day. People get the Sunday
scaries and we have to work through. Way is to
cultivate a positive thought for Monday mornings, but you know
tomorrow's Friday. Write it on your heart that every day
is the best day. And if I remember to tell y'all,
(12:10):
I'll just tell y'all now. One of the ways to
start exercising and staying with it, someone shared with me,
don't ever miss your workout today. So if you've committed
to it and you're going to go, go, But if
you don't feel like going, tell yourself, I'm going to
go today. I'll think about tomorrow. Maybe I won't go tomorrow,
but I'm going to go today. What happens tomorrow comes
(12:34):
and if you follow the Dame truth, Oh, I can't
not go today. But maybe I'll take off tomorrow. And
it's just kind of a little game we play with ourselves,
but it's a great way to really try to get
a mindset of healing. And here's the last one. When
you come out of the storm, you won't be the
same person who walked in. That is what the storm
(12:57):
is all about. And we're all going to go through storm,
but we can't live in the storm. A storm passes.
We just have to decide when we want that storm
to pass. So one of the things to get really
in tune with cultivating your new norm or your new
self or how to get yourself motivated is a process.
What we do in psychiatry is motivational thinking. It's a technique,
(13:21):
it's a process, and it's about setting up your intentions,
setting up your plans, setting up goals, and it's stopping
yourself from thinking about the negatives and only propelling forward
with what's next, what do I need to do? What
are my goals? And then how to look at your
goals and kind of go forward. And in looking at
your goals do we often sometimes find that we think,
(13:43):
but we don't have enough time. If I say I'm
going to go to the gym. I'm going to be sore.
I'm afraid. I'm afraid to go forward. We have to
get out of the way of your goal. And making
a goal doesn't mean you have to hit the target.
It just means you have to go to the target.
So the only way we're going to get you to
go forward is you got to start with some goals.
(14:05):
And I always tell folks, don't make a list of ten,
start with two. If you feel like you've got to
make a list, make five, but make sure that you
hit one or two each day and then build to
the third one. And have you ever thought about, well,
I'm going to do it, but you know, we'll wait
and see. And it's more of an ambivalence. You know,
(14:26):
you get to control you, You get to decide what
you do. In what we share here today and what
I share with most patients is I can't do the
work for you. I can only help you to get
the success to get there. It has to be a
conscious choice on your part. And if you if you
start something and you're not succeeding at it, it doesn't
(14:46):
mean you have to get the whole ball of wax
going again. Just keep moving forward. You know a lot
of times people will say things like, well, that's interesting,
but I don't have time. You know, I'm good with exercising,
but I've got to work on my diet it first. Well,
I don't know, why can't you do both? Why does
one have to come before the other? You know, I
(15:07):
really want to do something, but I just I don't
have the time. Now is not a good time. All
those are is ambivalents, those are excuses in all of
the cases of this, though, You've got to start somewhere.
I often talk about self talk, and self talk can
be very effective, especially if we've done the negative self talk,
(15:28):
you know what I'm talking about, and so we can
talk ourselves out of anything. Doesn't it seem like that?
But how do you talk yourself into something? And that's
where you have to be good to yourself. You have
to give yourself grace, You have to give yourself understanding,
and you have to reward yourself, compliment yourself and recognize, hey,
(15:49):
I'm not doing too bad. Kelly's asking as if you
do something that can't seem to finish it, when do
you call it quit? Well, I guess hens really what
it is? You know, if it's if it's a product
you start and say, I have patients sometimes they always
they get into some good hobbies, but before you know it,
(16:11):
their house becomes hobbyland, like hobby lobby, and they've got
a bunch of unfinished projects. I think if it's so
unmanageable that it gets in your way of going forward,
it might be time to just cut the cord and
start fresh. And if it's not a physical hobby, but
(16:32):
it's something like we were just talking about. You know,
I want to exercise, but I got to get my
nutrition or my diet in line first. Why not start
both because one kind of fuels the other. You know,
exercise is motivating and you feel good nutrition, you'll be
more motivated to eat the right foods because you just
spent the morning working out. Like for me, if I
(16:53):
put in a good workout. We went to class last
night because I couldn't fit in Orange Theory during the
day yesterday, so I was able to squeeze out the
last class of the night. And after I got done running,
you know, we wanted to go out and eat. You know,
I ate very well. I ate a really good burger.
I put a let us wrap around it took the
bun off, and I felt good about that because I
(17:15):
felt like I enhanced my workout. I didn't defeat it.
Now if I had oh and I got a salad,
So if I had gotten the fries and I had
used the bun it was kind of a half hearted effort.
I did get some good protein. But we have to
start thinking smarter so we don't have to work harder.
And if there's something that you've started that's more tangible
(17:38):
or more of a longer term project, I would say
this is where writing down your goals and putting things
on paper in a journal really makes a huge difference.
When you start putting energy behind it, other than just
having thoughts about it, you're going to have to follow Oh,
I wrote this down. Sometimes I'll write things on scrap paper,
(17:59):
and when I save them and I pull out some
of the scrappaper, I'm like, I got to do this.
I forgot about that. I got to finish this. So
I try to always keep it organized in a book,
but write down. If it's a product that you just
can't seem to finish, or something that you just can't
seem to get going, then think about how important is
it really You know one of my better examples. I
(18:20):
don't know if it's better, but you know, there's lower
priority things in my life right now because there's things
that I just I have to do right I can't
say no to a patient, so my schedule is always packed.
I have to make time for working on some different things,
either my podcast or I do a trauma support group.
But let's just say I have some pictures that I
have lined up where I want to hang them. I've
(18:41):
got most of them hung, but there's a few that
I haven't found quite the right spot for and they've
probably been here now for we're pushing two years. It's
just low on the list. I could clean them up
and put them away, but I really want to hang them.
So that's one example of you have to make a decision.
Is it worth letting them sit they're looking like they
belong on the wall but they're on the floor, or
(19:03):
do you just move to another place so that the
room looks cleaner. So, just depending on the project, hopefully
that will help you. Now it's something that is in
my wheelhouse about exercise or nutrition. I will tell you,
don't worry about what you had to eat this morning,
don't worry that you got up late and you're starting
the daily What can you do to start eating better today?
(19:25):
Or can you go to the gym? Can you go
take a walk today? So it's really not a matter
of defining the timeline, you know, morning night, starting this month,
starting next month, I'll start on a Monday. But get
the timeline, just get it started and then write things down,
use a calendar, use whatever works best for you. But
(19:45):
if you don't put it is a visual on paper
or on your phone or journal, you're not probably going
to follow through. And that's where self talk really comes in.
It becomes very important, you know, and thinking about if
you're going to journal. Here's a couple of examples. You
can say these things to yourself. You can pick the
topic that you want. But the idea about exercising, you know, well,
(20:08):
it helps me burn extra calories, it does improve my
heart health. I feel better physically and mentally, and I
do sleep better at night. Some of the cons well,
I'll be less tired, so maybe I'll have trouble sleeping. Oh,
if I don't exercise, it could increase my risks of
having heart problems. And by not exercising it may make
(20:29):
it harder to keep up with people and friends and
activities because a lot of people are very into taking
care of themselves and you don't want to be ten
years behind the group. If you're forty and you're walking
like you're fifty, you know, maybe you need to invest
in some cardiovascular training. But self talk is the same thing,
and even to the point of you know you can't
(20:52):
seem to finish it, do some self talk on your project.
How many positives do you have and how many negatives
do you have? If you don't finish the project? And
usually whateveryone has the higher list of pros and cons
is the one that's going to win out or should
win out. And that's kind of how I go with
it and making a plan. You know, the goal is
to overcome barriers to yourself. You know, think about making
(21:16):
a list or making buckets and use the buckets for
what are your concerns? You know, give your brain some
self evaluation. You know, my concerns? Are they physical health issues?
Are they work issues? Do I have relationship concerns? Am
I worried about my social life? Am I worried about money?
(21:36):
Am I worried about spirituality? And my spiritual health. Am
I worried about legal trouble? Am I worried about my emotions?
Do I have a problem with drugs or alcohol defining
my sexuality relationships? I think you talked about. So identify
your areas of concern and then rank them, and if
(21:56):
you've got nine or ten things, start working on the
top one, maybe the top two, because they could go
hand in hand, like diet and exercise. I really wouldn't
start one without the other. I would start them both
together because one will enhance the other one. And after
you rate your concerns those other three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine concerns, save them for when you're really underway and
(22:20):
you've got things rolling. To bring one of those up
and start working on that one. And kind of keep
your concerns as a you know, as an active task list,
but start the priority and then kind of write the
reasons down. I always like asking this question and motivational therapy,
and it kind of leaves it wide open. We call
it a miracle question. But if you had a magic
(22:41):
wand and we could solve all your problems overnight, what
would your life look like the next morning? What would
be different? And know that this is your ultimate goal,
that's your big picture. And it's great to have your
miracle question and describe it, because that's what I would
put at the top of my my whiteboard, or if
(23:02):
I was going to do affirmations throughout my house, maybe
write it to the front cover of your journal. But
it's knowing, like, what is the ultimate ideal if you
could wave a wand and solve all of these problems
and concerns that stress you, what would your life look
like tomorrow morning? And then just write a little paragraph
about it and put that on the front of your journal,
(23:23):
put that on your refrigerator, and use that as an
inspirational goal to target all the areas of concern that
you want to tackle. And maybe you have other thoughts
and questions, like you think about your miracle question, what
do you think would make your life better? You know,
sometimes people always want to look and find the greener grass.
Is it really greener? When you get to the greener side,
(23:45):
it's not always so green. It's got a little yellow
in there, it may even have a dry patch. But
once you hit that other side, Say you look at
somebody else's life and go, you know, they seem to
have it all when you really look inside, they have
other issue choose. It's just how they deal with them
or how maybe they don't share things and you don't
know some of the things they're struggling with. So think
(24:07):
about that. You may lift some things out thinking well,
my life would be better if and write it down.
And then if you think that's so, maybe you could say,
my life would be better if I would exercise, My
life would be better if I made more money, My
life would be better if I ate less carbohydrates, or
my life would be better if I didn't have to
(24:28):
worry about everybody taking every ounce of energy from me.
And my mom's so a draining, my sister's so annoying,
my husband, you go down the list. So if you
think your life would be better, then you have to
address those issues, not to get rid of the people
in your life, but to address how do you turn
those negatives into something that works for you. And we
(24:51):
can talk more about that, you know, lifting out your
goals we kind of mentioned and really specifically mirroring the
goals you know, and say, I want to lose weight,
but what does that mean? I want to lose five pounds?
I want to lose twenty five pounds. I want to
lose fifty pounds, and then what steps do you want
to take to get there? You know, if I want
to lose weight, thinking about it and looking at my
(25:13):
fridge or stepping on the scale isn't going to do
a whole lot. But setting a goal of I want
to lose fifteen pounds, and you make a plan of
which days of the week and what times you're going
to go exercise, and you know, sometimes the best way
to start a new exercise routine is try something you
haven't done before. If you have weights or a gym
(25:34):
in your house and you're not using it, chances are
you're not going to start. But if you go try
a new class, maybe a pilates class or a yoga class,
it's going to inspire some creativity and maybe you'll come
home and go. You know, I think, one day a week,
I'm going to do the gym here, and then I'm
going to sign up for the yoga class. The good
thing about that is you create a little diversity to
(25:54):
your exercise and it becomes more fun. I think several
times I've shared with you all the way I converted
having to work out versus wanting to work out is
I treat it as my recess, and I really love recess.
I love fun, I love activity. I love doing things
because I want to do them. So having to go
(26:15):
work out sometimes wasn't a lot of fun. Even the
chore of getting on treadmill. You know, my goal was,
I'm just gonna make it to a mile. Now I run.
I run as fast and as far as I can
to get to the fastest, the farthest spot on the
treadmill during class last night. I ran five miles today.
It was a shorter class than I only did three
point one. But you have to make it a fun goal.
(26:38):
And if you have not run or walked in a while,
it's ridiculous to try to say I'm going to get
to five miles. That did not happen overnight. It took years.
But when you start to accomplish I'm going to get
to a mile, and then you get to a mile
and you're going to go, I'm going to get to
one point five, that's huge. And you can do it
walking and you can just speed up your time. If
(27:00):
you don't like to run, or you've got you know,
knees or hip or any kind of issues that you
can't run, that's fine, and running commute, in my opinion, boring.
So if I don't have the right music, it makes
it harder for me to run. So we've got to
find all the little intricacies that are going to make
these activities enjoyable for you. And I go back to
the beginning where we start out with. You know, one
(27:22):
small positive thought to do something in the morning can
set the tone for the whole day, beyond the thoughts
and beyond the notes. Now you've got to take action.
And how are you going to take action? Because we're talking,
but we're not walking. So how are you going to
take action? A lot of folks, you're going to need
to have to put it on your calendar, you know.
But I have work, and I have kids, and I
(27:42):
have class and I don't have time. Well, as much
as I didn't want to get up early, I even
did something new this year this week and I got
up and I did a six am class. I can't
tell you that I will do it again, but at
least I know I can. And I got my work
out in because work wasn't going to get in my
way home. Life wasn't going to get in my way.
(28:03):
You know, class work wasn't going to get in my way.
Nothing was going to get in my way. Traffic got
a little bit in my way, but at six am,
there's not much traffic because I was actually on the
road at five point thirty. So you know, the other
part of all this, too is change. And that's where
I think people come into the hardest, hardest part of
all this is it sounds good, I'm going to write
it down. How do we create the change and keep it?
(28:25):
So it's just going to take time, and it's a mindset.
You know, when you start seeing things, when you start
seeing the benefits and you start seeing the change, that's
where you really start to stick. But emotional change is hard,
especially when you are not the only one in the
driver of your situation. And I say that because how
(28:47):
many of you have someone else or some others that
are dependent on you, and your responsibilities are to each
and every person, your kids, your spouse, your older parents,
a debilitated sister, you name it. In those cases, it's
really difficult sometimes to divide your time and be focused.
(29:07):
But here's the thing, and you've heard me say this before,
it's just like flying on an airplane. They teach you
so that if you ever encounter the emergency, you're going
to have the muscle memory with the mask on yourself first.
Then you can help everybody else. If you're saving someone
in the water, you generally try to throw the raft
(29:28):
out to them, the little bowie before you jump out
to them, or you bring the buoy out, the little
life raft out with you because if they grab onto
you and your neck, you can hold onto the life
raft because now you've got to save yourself. And then
so you have to carve out five, ten, fifteen, twenty
thirty sixty minutes in a day for you. And I'm
(29:50):
not going to say it's not hard, and I know
sometimes you're tired, but when you start doing it day
after day, then you get to look back in that
rear view mirror and go, wow, I did more than
I thought I could do these two weeks. And then
you go forward, you close up the rear view mirror,
don't look back, and you go another two weeks, and
before you know it, you will have built a habit.
(30:10):
And it does take about twenty one days. Some people
it's a little tougher, but you have to be able
to have it now. Change can affect us in many ways.
You know, there's social change, which means you may need
to extend yourself out more. It may mean you need
to be more social with people and that may not
be fun. Or you may need to pull back from
all of your social activity to try to be a
(30:33):
little less social so you get your priority straight. And
then there's spiritual thoughts. Spiritual change. You know, all these
factors go into our persona that can either help us
or hinder us to move forward. So you've got to
think of all those aspects. And then there's financial you know,
not everybody can afford to join a gym, not everybody
(30:54):
can afford to join a class, So you know, what
do you need to do and how do you prioritize that?
All those things make it really, you know, kind of tricky,
but here's the thing, it's your life. You get one
shot at it. I think some of these folks who've
given us these one lines of words matter, you know,
from the Dali Lama to Wayne Dwyer and Deepak Chopra,
(31:16):
even a aamiln Ralph Waldo Emerson. I mean, these are
wonderful philosophical people who have had a broad brush, a
broad view in life, and there's a message behind it. Right,
let's take the messages for today and make our tomorrow better.
If you are really kind of stuck and you do
(31:38):
have limitations that don't allow you to, you know, have
the financial ability to try new things, don't let the
financial piece be a barrier. It does not cost money
to go walk. It does not cost money to get
protein powder versus doritos. So you know, I think dorito's
maybe even more pricing now than buying pro ten powder
(32:00):
and a couple of water bottles. So, as one of
our viewers has said, it's absolutely right. It sacrifices. You
got to pick your poison and if you want to
feel better, if you want to change, it doesn't always
mean relying on a pill. Now, let me kind of
give you a little bit of that, because in talking
about psychiatry and psychology and how can people help to
(32:22):
get better, I fully believe that sometimes we need a
lift to get us there. And some folks have gone
through so many different things. Whether you're just an anxious person,
You've been anxious your whole life, whether you suffer and
struggle from not enough serotonin produced in your brain because
we haven't gotten you to get physically active yet. Whether
you're someone who's gone through personal tragedies, some of those
(32:44):
tragedies can be pretty significant utilizing a really good lift
of typically an antidepressant, either an SSRI or an SNRI.
One of my favorites generally is well Beutrim, but there's
a lot of other good ones, and they all do
slightly different things. But if you want to get yourself
in the right mindset, it's not a bad idea to
(33:05):
reach out to a professional, you know. That's why I
do what I do. That's where I've learned so many
great success stories from people because I've not only been
able to test it and try it on them, but
these are things that I've utilized myself in my own
personal journey, having overcome some you know, trauma and tragedy
and all kinds of stuff. You know, it's part of life.
(33:26):
It's how you look at it and how you overcome it.
So I do want to give, you know, an energetic
plug to all the therapists that we have out there.
All the psychiatrists and psychologists are psychners, practitioners. They're there
for you to get you to be your best self.
But like a few people that will come into my
office each week and they just come in and want
(33:47):
me to fix them. I can't fix them without their help.
And they have to be engaged, you know. I mean,
I can write a prescription, but you got to take it.
And I'll even have folks that's kind of you know,
It's funny you come into a professional who's trained and
knows how to provide the best suggestions for medications, and
they'll take one of these pills for a day and go, oh,
(34:09):
I can't take it. It made me tired. I stopped
taking it. And you know I usually set them out
on a two week appointment, So I'm going so for
the last two weeks, what have you been doing? You
stop the pill? Are you working out? Are you walking?
Have you changed your diet? How's your sleep going? So
they just wasted two weeks. So generally your provider's going
to give you side effects to worry about. But many
(34:30):
of these medications, until they're on board in your system,
you're going to need to take them for a few weeks.
Now again ruling out the side effects when you take them.
Most of them take that long to get enough of
a level up in your brain so that you feel better.
So keep that in mind. And your provider probably has
a pretty good idea of what you need, so work
(34:50):
with them. Don't go into the office and expect it's
not working. What are you going to do now, I'm
not going to do anything. What are you going to
do now? I'm going to give you suggestions and I'm
going to give you really good things that are going
to help you. But we've got to work together. And
if I do my part to kind of set a plan,
just like we're doing here, you know you're going to
be the one right You, guys are going to go
(35:11):
make a list of things that are positive negative. You're
going to make a list of your top three goals.
You're going to look at your areas of growth and
goals and see what really makes the most sense for
you to focus on. And you're going to clean out
your closet. You're going to take away some negative thinking.
You're going to take away some negative people that maybe
I'm hearing the chimes and I don't know what it is.
Can you guys hear that? It must be something that's
(35:33):
set in the house. It's not a doorbell, it's so weird.
But I digress because it's just like China in my
ear and there's no chimes in here, so I don't
know what it is. But anyway, if you can't hear it,
it's just and I know I'm not hearing things, So
no delusions. But you've got to really take your own
mindset and then ask for help get the help going forward,
(35:55):
because sometimes it's hard to do this stuff alone. Let
me also give a quick shout out to my friends
at Hearty Nutritionals too, because while I don't have my
protein drink in hand or my bottle party Nutritionals, the
daily Essential nutrients are a fabulous way to really boost
your immune system as well as your energy. And if
you go onto hardnutritionals dot com. Oh, it's at the
(36:18):
bottom of our page too, hardnutritionals dot dot com. If
you pick one thing, let's just start with one thing
and I can get you guys started on this. Pick
one thing, the essential nutrients, the daily essentials. It's daily
essential nutrients. It's around fifty five dollars. I think for
the powder you can get capsules, but the daily essential
nutrients are going to energize you, give you focus, help
(36:40):
you feel really good. I use these to help people
get off of many of the medications that they find habit.
For me, it's a great way to really just improve
your overall physical health and it just it goes a
long way. So when you do find what you want
when you check out, because I'm one of the providers
on their site, just type in Magnolia and the product
(37:02):
code and it will give you fifteen percent off. And
they'll also do free consultations with my patients. So if
you want a free consult when they send you the
check out, there's a link and they'll talk to you
about some of the clinical applications, especially if you are
someone who wants to tight trade off of some of
your medications, especially some of the more heavy duty ones.
(37:24):
This product bar none is the best that I've ever seen.
I've had Doctor Hardy's son on my show I think
back last September October, So if you want to see
that show, you can take a look on iHeartRadio and
type in wellness and censored with PATTYG and you can
see all the prior shows out of lance And don't
(37:44):
forget if you need any information from me, use my
product scanner that we have there. Just put your phone
over it and the link will come up and you'll
be able to pull up my books. You'll be able
to pull up how to access me if you have questions.
I've even got a link for different supplements if you
need be complex, nad A AC. These are all the
(38:04):
things that I take myself and in the vitamin cabinet
that I have there on the web page. I give
everybody twenty percent off, so you're third party tested. They're
the most pure products. They're not something you're going to
find on the Walmart shelf. You know, no slant to Walmart,
but you know, if you get something cheap, there's usually
a lot of fillers. So definitely definitely look into that.
(38:29):
And oh, somebody's sending a positive note. I appreciate that.
I didn't realize. Okay, I appreciate the connection there. Yeah,
you guys can send this to anybody you want. Right now.
We're live, and I think there's a way to share,
so if you want to share the podcast anybody. But
this show and many of our shows are good not
(38:51):
just for today, not just in the moment, but they
can really create a toolkit for you of success. It's
like free therapy and free counseling, and if you go
back to the prior shows and even this one, there's
a lot of good stuff that we have on there
to help you be your best self. And you know,
while I'm going to touch on this and then I'm
going to share a little more. But thinking assertively, do
(39:12):
you all know what that means? Thinking assertively, I mean
to kind of state the obvious, I would think, But
do you really need approval to think the best of yourself?
Do you need to worry about hurting someone else's feelings?
Do you think it's selfish to ask for things that
you want? And do you believe that you know you're
(39:33):
going to cause a problem or a scene if you
set boundaries? And those are the important things when we
talk about self care, care and dealing with other people
who may affect your life negatively, either as a narcissist,
as a victim, as someone who just maybe the other
person or people in your life don't have boundaries. If
you don't start to set boundaries and start thinking assertively,
(39:54):
people will walk all over you and then you lose
a little piece of yourself each day, each week, each month,
and before you know it, you come to a crossroads.
And a barrier that do you really know who you are?
What is it that you really believe in, What is
that that inspires you? What are you all about? So
you know, think assertively and why that's so important. I
(40:15):
was thinking about, you know, a lot of the things
that have been going on in the world today, and
we really do have to turn it off. Turn off
the social media, turn off some of the news, turn
off some of the noise. If you do so for
two weeks, I promise you it's all still going to
be there. And while there may be some new stuff,
you have given yourself two weeks to heal and repair
(40:37):
and focus on you. I want you to start thinking
assertively for yourself. What really is going to affect you
in the most positive way? Okay? And when you think
about that, here's just a couple of things to think
about in terms of you and your values. Everybody's got
different thoughts, different values, different beliefs. But you know, I'm
going to read you a list, and by reading it,
(40:59):
if you get to rewatch this show and you want
to write it down, you can. But what are your
values in terms of achievement, caring, commitment, creativity, duty, excitement, family, fitness,
for giving, freedom, friendship. What are your values for gratitude, growth, help, hope, humor, integrity?
(41:22):
What are your values for knowledge and for love? What
are your values for providing? For peace, for responsibility, for
self acceptance, for traditional and for tolerance? And just think
about those words. You know, what are your values? And
somewhere in there is a value for self? Right? It
has to be otherwise you get lost with other thoughts
(41:44):
and emotions. My goodness, I can't believe we're like nearing
the end of the show today and I'm only halfway through.
So we may have to have a follow up here
so I can get through some of the other things.
But you know, pay close attention to your values and
know that you've got to kind of figure out for yourself.
You know what's the what, when, where? And your thoughts
and feelings that are going to drive you and if
(42:05):
you know, you know what was, what's helpful to you,
what's supportive for you? That's the who try to bring
those people into your life. Who else can you partner with?
Who else can you go to the gym with? You know?
Who else can you get into a meal plan with?
Right and starting to eat healthy? What time of day
is best for you, what season is best for you.
I always say there's no time like the present. And
(42:26):
then where are you and what's happening in your life?
In your situation? Can you really start some goals today
or do you have to clear some things out? Like
our first caller had questions like what if you can't
finish it, maybe it's time to cut the cord and
start something new. And then what are your thoughts and
feelings you know of your time and the things that
you're thinking about. If you're really stressed by all this,
(42:49):
maybe now is not the time. But if you're really
ready to make a change, I always say there's no
time like the present. With a lot of the stuff,
we can recognize mistakes from the past, and so how
do we not make those same mistakes going forward. That's
why I always say it's important to get someone to
help you along the way. You know, podcast books, self help,
(43:09):
these types of interactions, these are all toolkits to help you.
But if you are struggling or suffering and you have
just not gotten to the point where you're making a
change or a difference in your life, and you feel
thoughts of sadness, empty, angst, lonely, worry, panic, fear, insomnia,
inability to eat, inability to fall asleep, you wake up
(43:31):
a couple of times during the night. Go get a
mental health assessment, see what's going on. Maybe you need
just some weekly or bi monthly talk therapy help you
with some of the intentions that we've set here for
you to try to get started with. There's just so
much more, you know, for taking some steps forward. I
just wanted to make sure we touched on getting an
(43:53):
exercise routine, going look at your diet, find ways to
reduce stress and prove your sleep, spend some time with friends,
and get more physical in your day. But for now,
you know, let's kind of leave you with some of
these things. You know, self care matters, you matter, and
at wellness uncensored. Our goal is to take people forward
so that we never live in fear or panic. The
(44:15):
whole reason we started this show is because of the
four years of just misinformation, fear, pandemonium, and lies, and
people like myself were basically taped and gagged to speak
out and fight against things that didn't make sense. You'll
find lots more in some of the shows that are
on iHeartRadio if you want to hear about some of
the deeper, darker sides that have gone on in the
(44:36):
last four years. My book, they call me Harriet. You're
going to read some things that may actually curl your hair.
So I encourage you to get that book and know
that there's people out here like myself that have had
a lot of history and experience and speaking the truth
and really wanting to take care of you to make
you your best self. And that's why we're here today.
Next week I may have someone on who wrote a
(44:58):
book on vaccine injuries some of the misinformation. But if
I'm not able to have her on next week, will
certainly have her in the coming week, so be looking
forward to that, and we'll certainly finish up with some
motivational work and ways to get you to be your
best self. I'm so excited you guys tuned in today.
Please share this with others, jump on my link. I
encourage to learn and want to dig deeper for good information,
(45:20):
Stay true to yourself, turn off the chatter, try to
cut down on social media. Have a great rest of
your week and a wonderful weekend, and I will see
you next Thursday at three pm. Eastern have a great day.
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