BONUS LIVE EPISODE: Relationship Restored talk Worst 1st Dates, What Makes A Good Date, Knowing Someone Is The One + More

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Together before let me like on alove seat. I love it so much.
No, today is such a specialday, and I'm so excited because
Relationship Store has been around for abouta year and a half now and we've
been doing a lot of potting,but we've never actually had a live podcast

(00:20):
event and connection event. So I'mjust super excited that you all are here
with us, that we have peoplecoming out, and that this is our
first thing. Man, this isthis is dope. And we had to
give a special shout out to theplace that we're at. Yah. Yeah,
the Line Hotel for hosting us inthis podcast room and allowing us to
do this podcast here. Hey,the line, it's beautiful. Y'all sent

(00:44):
us videos. But it wasn't tilI walked there I was like, oh,
this is gorgeous. Yeah, it'sgiving strong date night vib strong.
And that's that's that's what we're talkingabout tonight, right And that's what's really
dope is that here the line.They want to focus on love at the
Line here. Then you can doa lot of things. You can meet
your boot here, yes, plans, you can have a date night with
your boo here also plans and guesswhat guess guess what else you could do?

(01:07):
Ron you can get married. Petyour boot at the line. All
y'all already had y'all weddings. Thankyou. We are taking applications, Okay,
sure you send them to brief first, shall evaluate and then send me
the right definitely thinks mak No,you don't want that. Wrong? Okay,

(01:29):
I'm sorry. It's not my faultif you do that and y'all don't
work. It's y'all, I'm supplyingthe product. But you do what the
product is up to you. Thequality. If you meet somebody new and
you just met him two weeks agoand you want confirmation that that's the person

(01:49):
who gonna spend the rest of yourlife with, talk to break, okay,
because she is a hopeless romantic.Okay, that's not a good thing,
though. That go to Drake becausehe'll let you know what's really more
time, give it about forty fivedays for sure. But today we're going
to really talk about date nights andwhat goes into dating and what makes dating
successful. But before we hop intothat, I just want to give anybody
who's not familiar with relationship restore whatwe are. We're just a community of

(02:14):
relationship loving people that love to talkrelationships and we love to educate entertained through
relationship content and on the Relationship Restoreplatform. We have three podcasts. We
have For the Girls with Angela,Cci and b B. You want to
tell them about For the Girls alittle bit, Yeah, yeah, So
For the Girls is essentially three friendswho are married and we all found marriage

(02:37):
differently, like their journeys were totallydifferent, and so on the show,
you're getting three different perspectives from threemarried women of how to navigate through love,
dating, and at the end ofthe day marriage. So it's really
cool because we're all so different.By the end of the day, the
goal is the same. It's it'slove, y'all. It's love. Love
that love that so well spoken.As soon as I get married, we're

(03:00):
warming up your chair. They're goingto make So the next show I'll let
my wife do it again. Ismy wife and I have a show called
Worth the Wait. Yes, itis what it sounds like, y'all.
We waited for marriage. It wasworth it. It was long, but
it was it was worth it.And essentially, you know, it started
with us sharing our journey of whatit was like waiting because it wasn't something

(03:23):
back then that was really like common. So you know, we went through
waiting and then getting married, andso now it's life after waiting and essentially
just our relationship, the things thatwe've learned and the information that we share
to hopefully help others in their journeys, whether waiting or not. For sure
eloquently puts and you were worth waitingfor you too, baby, I could

(03:45):
wink I was. She can't waitguys, And we have our last show,
Real Love Scenario with me and Ronda. Ronda, you want to tell
them a little bit about Real LoveScenario. Yes, First of all,
Real Love Scenario, I came upat that coin lovers out there. So
Real Love Scenario is a advice basedpodcast. I mean it's an advice based

(04:12):
relationship podcast. People write in abouttheir real love scenarios. And Dre and
I as two friends who are verydifferent ten years apart, one single,
one marry one from PG one fromBaltimore. We're so different, but somehow
we are able to give really wellrounded advice coming from our different perspectives.
So it's really fun and it's welearn. We learn a lot, and

(04:35):
I think we can all say thatabout our podcast is that we learn so
much from each other, from thepeople that write in exploring different perspectives.
So if you haven't her relationship withStore, that haven't checked out in the
podcast, make sure you go checkit out. Have waiting and we're launching
our community in twenty twenty four.We're doing more events like this, So
just just connect with us anyway Instagram, YouTube, on the website subscribe.

(04:57):
All right, everyone, let's getin a date night Night is our ToIP
because we hear the line it's allabout love at the line and date night
at the line. Yeah, soI want to kick at Deronda first.
Right, so we already talked.You know this half is married. This
this is more than half. Okay, my bad. This group right here
is married and Ronda is going toget married. Period. It's going to

(05:20):
happen. She just lasts out ofthis group. That's all. That's it.
But we want to know when wecome to Dayton. Yes, what's
the streets like? And what doyou and what do you feel like?
Is the best way to meet peopleout here in twenty twenty three? Oh
man, those are those are somequestions. Let me wrap it up Okay,
dating today has some serious complexes toit, and I try not to

(05:46):
say that it's bad, or it'sp in the pool, or that it's
all the things that we used todescribe it, even if sometimes I really
actually feel that way. I trynot to say that because I want to
remain super optimistic about it, becausethe truth is that's how I will meet
my husband. So if I don'tembrace it, I won't meet them.
So worth the way, I justgot to push through this process. So

(06:10):
it's complex because social media plays somuch of a part. So much of
the world is very adversarial right now, and so when you meet people,
it lacks sometimes that organic, nice, just fun, chill interaction. It's
like, so what do you do? So how much money do you make?
Would you eat at this restaurant?Like it's so so much so it's
like very robotic. But yeah,that's that's kind of dating today. And

(06:32):
your second question was what's dating liketoday? I think that where do I
meet people? I'm on a datingapp one I want one one Hinge call

(06:56):
me if you want to sponsor me. Okay, yes, I'm one Hene
and it's cool, but like again, it feels very artificial because it's like
picking people from an assembly line.It's like, yeah, okay, well
he's got Nope, not right,Nope. I would prefer to meet people
organically, right, And I strugglewith even being able to do that because
I'm tired a lot, and I'mlike, I'm really going out, but

(07:16):
I would rather meet someone out andabout. I feel like, again,
it's more natural. You can justspark up a conversation. So yes,
right now on the app. Inreal life, I got to do better
about meeting them in real life.Got you, gotcha got insight that can
help a lot of people. Theymarried, you know. I just want
to commend you because a lot ofpeople. I know, I have a

(07:39):
lot of friends. Really I'm noteven trying. So yeah, And I
think we said this on like apodcast, previous podcast, like you're you're
not going to get there, Likewhat's that saying? You're not gonna win
the lottery less you buy a ticket. You're literally not going to win the
power ball. That's my therapist islike Randa, He's not going to knock
on your door just so you knowto try. So yes, thank you.

(08:01):
Accept setups? Okay she does theother day, I know we we're
oh and three. I was like, all right, I got time.
It's all good. It's all good. So we're gonna get into some more
related dating topics. But I justwant to remind everybody that we're going to
allow you if you're upstairs in themezzanine for this live podcast watching us,
shout out to y'all, thank youfor coming through. But we're gonna have

(08:24):
some of y'all come down and jointhe conversation with us. Just find Alexia.
Alexia, wave your hand. Shehas a black dress on right,
black dress on Kelly, and justfind Alexi. And we're going to have
some people come down and join theconversations in the second half of the show.
So I'm excited about that. Buttalking to I'm married folks and everybody.
Just for everybody, just for theuh you know that's that's here today.

(08:46):
I will include you. Thank you. I want to ask you the
first question, So what do y'allthink makes a good first date? I'll
start with breath. Well, I'mvery basic that what I sound good about
yourself? It could be a goodquality. When I say basic, I
mean like I'm not I don't havean expectation of a first date. I

(09:09):
feel like, if we can haveconversation, that's what I want. It's
kind of like similar with my friends, Like if they're like, yo,
you all want to go out,I'm like, but if you're like,
you want to come over and havea glass of wine and chit chat,
I'm like absolutely. So I feellike I don't enjoy like big public places
where there's a lot of distractions.When I say basic, it's like I
don't care where we are or reallywhat we're doing, as long as there's

(09:31):
some sort of food available because Istay hungry. I'm hungry when i'm eating.
I'm hungry right after I finished eating. So I need you to know
on this first date how to keepme happy. So like food, but
I'm not picky with what type offood, and just like an opportunity to
connect, so as little distractions aspossible. But I do think, for
like, if I could pick ormake the perfect date, it would be

(09:54):
something that has a view, right, something that is like secluded and very
private. And I love picnic,so like food on the floor is my
thing. So like I think likea picnic like in the middle of anywhere
with a pretty view, like anendless drinks. Give me, give me
a good drinks. That's a greatthat's a great date. But let me

(10:18):
this is a lesson learned for everybodywho's listening, everybody who's watching, is
that you don't always have to bealigned on things when it comes to the
person that you marry. I can'tstand eating on the floor. I don't
all It took five years off forhim to give me a picnic, and
it was a luxury picnic. Itwasn't on the floor. It was on
a table because I want it onthe floor. That was like three inches
off the floor. And it wasthe perfect compromise and it was a perfect

(10:43):
it that's mandatory required, all right, So Angel, what do you think
what makes a good first date?So for me, I'm a little bit
opposite. I am. I likean experience, and so one thing that
I thought of is, you know, it's about to be within our time.

(11:03):
We have some great mountain towns aroundus in Pennsylvania and West Virginia,
like something that would be really dopefor a first date, and like these
are like an hour hour and ahalf away, so you can have conversation
on the way there. You knowwhat I'm saying and to know each other
a little bit better. You canhave a day of activities, maybe do
like a private ski lesson or likesome like snow tubing. You can hire

(11:28):
a private shots experience like together,have an intimate dinner. You know,
you can make it outdoors like inthe snow, could be sexy, like
you can really get creative with itlike this. You know, it's like
pressive for me. That would bea fantastic first Hopefully you like them though,
because that would be a real awkwarddrive home. So also, let

(11:50):
me have you out this. Ithink before you go on the first date,
you need to have a conversation withthis person at least like a couple
of times, like on the phone. I don't know, like why like
actually talking to people on the phoneis so taboo nowadays that have a conversation,
see you, Like, do Ieven want to spend nine hours with

(12:11):
this person going to West Virginia?Like if not, then honey, don't
waste your time. Even if you'regoing for an experience, someone else to
give you the experience. You feelme like, what are we doing here?
So I CC's experience and so whatyou got? What do you think
it's a good first date. Imean, I'm a little combination of the

(12:33):
two. So okay, obviously I'mmarried. My husband's upstairs, so he'll
probably say this is incorrect. Ithink we talked on the phone before we
went on our first I think itwas straight text. Didn't y'all get like
set up though, sister makes andI want to say our first date was
the perfect date because it was acombination of the two, like and it
started off awkward, I think becausebut I really really like the intimate part,

(13:01):
the first part where it was thespace to have open conversation and it's
not too like what where are yousaying? Like it was really I think
that's where he saw that I talked, and that's why I saw that,
Oh he doesn't talk, so compensatedfor him. Go ahead and raise your

(13:22):
hand up there, Sean, Iknow you out there because he doesn't talk.
There, we go to people hedoesn't know. Drinks was mandatory.
That was It made me loose,It made him loosen up. It made
me loosen up because I was,whoa, he is not talking. I'm
gonna keep going. And then Ithink from there is where we got spontaneous

(13:43):
and start getting into some experiences.We went to like a really cute I
want to say, it's not speakeasy, but it was a themed bar
where we got a little drunker,you know, and then from there it
gets a little cloudy, the vibesget cloudy. But it was some experiences.
It was day, I want tosay, with some salsa, with
some some sight seeing in there.I'm pretty sure I love that. But

(14:07):
I'm saying like, even though abeautiful snow tubing experience sounds amazing, don't
discount what you guys have here ind C. Honestly, she's d M
and me all these places. I'mlike, this is in DC, like
since when Sean and I were datingten years ago. There's everything's new,
So don't discount some of the experiences, some of the intimate settings that you

(14:31):
could find in d C. SoI'm a combination of the two. I
like experience a little basic so Ican get you to talk even if you're
not going to talk, and thenyou know, open up and then woo
formula to see what you're gonna say. Man in the room, our fearless

(14:54):
leader Smith, what you got forus? That's pretty simple for me,
I think makes a good day isconversation and connection. Anywhere that we can
connect and have conversation. I'm downfor. I remember in high school I
had this like first date that everyI took everybody on. It worked though,
and then being in high school.So if you're in you're here in

(15:15):
the d m V. This iswhat I did. You go down the
National Harbor right location. Already we'relike, okay, we're gonna talk about
it. Probably get with all myexes. That would be the one thing
they could probably be like you too. It works though. Connection. So

(15:37):
you get the National Harbor, youyou know, park, walk down to
the water, then you take theboat over the old Town Alexandria old experience
and experience, but you can stillhave conversation and connections. And then we
walked to a restaurant down in oldtown. There could be Italian, different
spots, anything. And then youtake the boat back and then you know

(16:02):
what's at the National Harbor Ben andJerry's ice cream. Oh that the what
he made. I never I neverknew that I thought you did that.
With all your show, we knewthat you were the one. That's what
we knew because we always know thatfirst well, the harbor a little expensive.

(16:23):
He ain't doing that. The boatslike we had the clear the clear
joint with the clear floor, soit was like twenty dollars more. I
was like, Oh, he spendit. I'm trying, you know,
I was trying. I was trying. But I want to get to the
next question. But also, ifyou're listening upstairs, if you want to
sit down with us for the secondpart of the podcast, make sure you
find Alexia Aluxia raise your hand upthere. She has a black dress on.

(16:47):
You can go see her. Youcan come down and talk to us
and join the conversation about dating.But I want to ask the next question.
I think I'm want to throw thisone to Rondah just I want to
know, because we talked about beingout here in the streets, what is
the worst. Wow, I've beenon a couple bad ones, if you

(17:07):
want to Okay, I'm gonna gowith the very first one that always pops
in my head when I'm asked.This question started off so good. We
talked several times before we went onthe date. He planned for us to
go to a place in Baltimore wherehas a view off the water. Very
nice, intimate restaurant fairly expensive butnot too crazy. Following the formula.
Filing the formula, he offered topick me up, which is like,

(17:32):
people don't do that anymore, butthis was several years ago, offer to
pick me up, and I accepted. I accepted for him to pick me
up. So we rode to therestaurant together. We talked on the ride
there. All was well, helooked very nice. Yeah, right,
get to the restaurant, order thefood, very sexy ambiance, and I
think maybe like after dinner we weretalking and I noticed like he just kept

(17:53):
staring at my mouth. And wehave had drinks and all the things,
but you know, like I'm lookingat your eyes, but am I looking
at your mouth right now? Totallylooking now, I'm looking at your mouth.
So I'm like, he's staring atmy mouth and he's like, you
know, it's just I just keepthinking about like and I was like,

(18:14):
oh, oh wow, this wentstraight to hell, like fast, like
straight to how And I was like, oh yeah, that's crazy. I
tried to move on, laughing atall, and then he did it again
and he just kept like I canjust imagine. I could just imagine,
And I was like, oh,yeah, that's weird, Like I want
you to stop doing that. Andhe was like, I'm just being honest.
I'm just being honest. I'm like, okay, So I'm like,

(18:37):
let me run to the bathroom.I left, you left him. Yeah,
So it was like so awkward becauseit was going so wow. I
was like, this is so nice. He's a gentleman. Got it gotten
a text creeper and laughed, Yes, yes, so unfortunate. We got
to do better, brothers. There'sa lot of stories like that, like

(18:57):
it gets creepy, it gets creepyquick quick. Yeah, like the drinks
just he got too loose, toofast. And I'm honestly glad I saw
it because I didn't have to wasteany more time. Sure. No,
I definitely can't wait till we havea guy that comes down and sit on
the couch, because I know womenalways have a lot of crazy date stories,
but it'd be some crazy stuff outthere that men be dealing with too.

(19:22):
Guy and he told me a womanasked him for five hundred dollars at
the end of the night. SoSean and I were talking about this and
I was like, oh, Itold him my little story and I was
just like the date was off becauseyou know, I thought the man was
gay, you know, that wasthat was I mean, there's nothing wrong
with that. It just that's mypreference not to not to date a gay

(19:45):
man. Yes, but his stories, I was like, what And I'm
not even to put him out ofthere because he's probably looking down at his
hand. But I'm like, firstof all, how many dates are you
going on to end up in thesesituations so dre, handsome as you are
right now? I know you've beenon a few dates. Go ahead,

(20:07):
what's the worst one. I'm tryingto think. I haven't had anything that's
been like, like, my dateshave gone smooth because I stick to the
formula, sticks to the formula,like I've done it so many times.
Not going to be bad. Takewhat's going on, you know? But
they can get weird. Yeah,But I luckily, you know, I
got married. We got together whenI was twenty two, I think.
So I was in college playing football, doing my thing. Was I really

(20:30):
dating? Did I have money toreally date? Like? No, not
really, So most of my adultlife I was with my wife. So
I ain't have no crazy stories.But I could imagine if I'm in the
position I was in am now anddating. Yeah, it'd be a little
while probably, But I want toask one more question to the group,
and then we're gonna do a rapidfire. Then we're gonna have some people
come down and join the conversation.Make sure if you're upstairs, if you

(20:52):
want to join the conversation, Alexiaknow, and we're going to have you
guys come down a little bit inlike the next five to ten minut it's
yourself. So I have this questionfor the married folk in a room.
Okay, and this is just somegood advice. We can be quick with
it. Something that people could takeaway is that how did you know your
person was the one for you?I have a very simple answer to that.

(21:21):
Anybody can feed me No. Iagain being a hopeless romantic. You
know, I've I've dated a lotof guys, and I have always like
pictured date one or date two likeooh, well my life looked like this
person. Like I would always thinklike, oh, this could be long
term. So it's not hard forme to picture being with someone. But
in every relationship that I was in, or every encounter I had with a

(21:45):
man, there was always like,ah, but this, this and this,
and it was like things that Iwas like, Oh, I could
get over that, or this ishow I would deal with that, or
you know, it's not the worstthing that you would have to deal with,
whereas with Drea and I had likezero doubts, like they're the one
weird thing that I had, whichwas so goofy. A lot of people

(22:06):
who know me know I have likea little people complex. So it's like
I drive a big car because Ifeel like a big girl. And when
I'm standing with my friends who arefive seven to five nine, I feel
like we're all the same height.And then I see a picture and I'm
like, is that me tiny?And I remember walking down the street with
Dre and telling him like I waslike, I just I you know,

(22:26):
like I'm taller than you. OrI said something about heype and he was
like what. And as we're walking, we like see ourselves through like windows,
and I'm like, oh, wow, he's so much taller than me.
And so I'm like for that tobe the only thing that ever crossed
my mind, like is he tallenough? Like and I had to check
myself and then I, you know, later on just pondering and like thinking

(22:48):
about things, I was like,Wow, I've never actually doubted anything about
Drey or whether he was my person. And that was a cool thing to
realize because I was like, dang, I had the moment of being like,
this is my person. But theneven in moments where I tried to
like make myself be realistic and Iwas like, all right, what if
he's not, Like why would henot be? And I couldn't think of

(23:10):
a single thing. So I feellike, if you're debating whether or not
someone is your person, like,no matter what things you go through with
someone, they're not going to beperfect, right. But if you're trying
to balance like a list of likereasons why not and then reasons why you
should, that's I don't think that'syour person, right. It's like if
it makes sense, it's going tomake sense. And as Drey always says,

(23:30):
if you got to make it makesense, it doesn't. So I
got one, y'all, So Igotta take it back to Toxic CC.
So if you guys follow for thegirls, y'all know all about Toxic CC
and all of hercenanagansa she used togo through in her twenties. So going
back to the question about like whatwas the worst state. This kind of

(23:51):
like transitions into like how I knewmy husband was the one. So one
of the worst states that I hadbeen on was actually like close like when
I like around the time that wasmeeting my husband and I was out with
this dude who was pretty popular.I used to date a lot of like
party promoters and like dudes like inthe scene, which are the worst type
of dudes to date. By theway, ladies, if you're like dating

(24:12):
somebody like that, cut it off, cut it off, and then also
working yourself. So so anyway,so there was this one night where I
was out with this dude and hewas like, it was just it was
just going bad from like the jump, because I promise you guys, I

(24:33):
ran into every single dude I hadever talked to been in relations with that
night. Okay, it was itgot real bad, real quick. So
like it was just really like theenergy got off like from the jump.
Needless to say, long story short, we still try to, you know,
continue on with the night. Butwe ended up at Rose Bar Chill.

(24:55):
My most recent ex boyfriend was there. We were in his section.
It was Gnarley. When I tellyou it ended and like us getting into
a physical, uh not physical,a verbal altercation, like in front of
the whole club and like me likelike, y'all know, I'm feisty and

(25:15):
I'm loud, okay, And Itook my hands so everybody knew. And
I was super fly too. Ithink I was wearing this fur and I
was like, I was like please. So anyway, and long story short,
after that, I was like,I need to switch up my environment
because this obviously this environment is notworking for me. So when I did
that, I actually connected with myhusband really through business. I used to

(25:37):
be in finance and I was hostinga financial literacy seminar and you know,
he hit me up through that toconnect with me. And our first conversation
was unlike any conversation I had I'veever had with any man before. He
was the smartest man I had evertalked to. He was so funny,
I mean literally could not stop chuckling. And I was like, after weoked

(26:03):
off the thune, I was like, yo, that was different. That
was different. And so I thinkthat was the first thing like when you
get a sign of like this isdifferent, and like this is different in
a like take note of that andthen the other thing. You know,
you know, long story, likefast forward a little bit. You know
we're actually dating now. And ifyou know toxic CC, she does not

(26:27):
like to talk. She did notlike to communicate because she didn't have good
ways to communicate. I didn't growup seeing good communication in my household,
so I was a runner naturally.So when Shane and I would get into
arguments about something, I would tryto break up with him every single time,

(26:47):
and I'm like, you know what, whatever, I'm leaving, this
is just too much blah blah blah. And he would always be like,
Yo, where are you're going?You're not going nowhere? Like you're not
leaving, We're not breaking up,You're staying here. The communicate. We're
gonna talk it out. We're gonnawork through this. Like like why you
keep trying to run away. Idon't care how uncomfortable it is for you
to talk to me. You're gonnatalk to me. Like I was like

(27:10):
okay, and so like you know, just that like seeing a man who
actually cared enough to like be like, Yo, sit down, you're not
gonna leave. We're gonna talk thisthrough. We're gonna work this out and
I was like, okay, wecan get married now, just want to
get some time to people to comedown. So if you could give some
points briefly and out there something andthen I mean to me, I'm kno,

(27:34):
going a lot of you. Idon't think I knew Sean was the
one on the first date, sorrybab the second day. But I think
to CEC's point, I think Istarted noticing and it wasn't even maybe in
dates that he kept choosing me,like over and over again, similar to
what Ceci was saying, like throughthe storms, through the arguments, through

(27:57):
all the drama, because you guysknow, you know, Sean had a
one year old kid when I methim, so and that came with a
big bag of drama. And throughall that and him trying to grow up
as a man and me trying togrow as a woman, I think,
and I can't pinpoint the time Imentioned like we had this long day at

(28:19):
Dangerously Delicious Pies where we had thisgreat conversation, But I don't think that's
the moment I knew he was theone. I think is when I noticed
every single time something kept happening,every time something came kept happening, and
there was people who were throwing itin there left and right. You shouldn't
be with him because he has akid, You shouldn't be with him because
he oh this, oh that,oh, But he just kept choosing me

(28:41):
over and over and over again,and in my body, I kept choosing
him. So that's how I knew. I don't know when exactly it was,
but that's exactly when I knew that, Okay, this is this is
the guy, you know what Imean? And I guess for me,
it was just one thing my stepdadalways told me, is that look at

(29:03):
her heart. Is she a goodhearted person? Because there's gonna be ups
and downs in that relationship, Butwhat does her heart look like? So
Bria has an amazing heart. Brieis one of the sweetest people I've ever
met. She's so kind, she'sso like, you know, always thinking
of others. And then when Ifirst met her, I've never seen anybody
operate like her. As her friendsyou kind of like, it's just how
she operates. When I first mether, she had a business called Shameless

(29:26):
and she was going in restaurants talkingto every single person, like making friends
with everybody. And I'm like,who is this? And I think the
other thing too, is that oneof the biggest things I think when it
comes to having a relationship with somebodytruly being committed and you can have problems,
but that commitment is what comes first. And you know I always say
this is that, like, ifyou want to get a good grade in

(29:48):
the class, the first thing yougot to do is show up the class.
You can't tell me you need help, but you ain't showing over the
class every day. Show up theclass that shows me you're committed. Then
if you show up the class everysingle we can get a tutor, we
can get somebody to help you,you can come to office hours, but
I need the commitment to be therefirst before you we can work on anything

(30:08):
else. And I feel like alot of people get that mixed up in
relationships. They'll sit there and tryto fix somebody who ain't coming to class.
So the thing is that with Briand I, Bree has some things
that she was working through, butshe showed up the class every single day
and never questioned her commitment at allto me. She never questioned my commitment
to her, and we were ableto work through things and grow through things

(30:30):
as we learned each other because wewere young. When you look back,
it's like, man, we weretwenty two, like we were young when
we met each other, so wehad things to work through. So that's
how I knew. Yeah, youguys see each other say one thing.
Listening to all of you, therecurring theme was commitment. Every single one
of you talked about sticking through everything, choosing me over and over again,

(30:51):
showing up to class, not lettingme run, showing me like I have
nothing, I have no things,like the choice is just like he's here,
he's sticking in it. Like thatis beautiful, And I think that's
something that's kind of missing today.So many people are willing to just throw
it away. And you know,I will say, everything's not meant for
forever, not everything all the time. But you can't want to get married

(31:12):
and not be willing to commit.Sure, impossible, So good vibes,
all right, So we're gonna doa quick rapid fire and then we're gonna
have our people come in and we'regonna have some guests. So rapid fire.
So we know the ladies of theInternet. Ron and I always debate
our gores Internet Beyonces Internet, wesaid, the Carters, the Carters Internet.

(31:34):
They made a list and they talkedabout where they absolutely refused to go
on first dates. So I justwant to ask the group just quick yes
or no, all together, alltogether, you know, at the same
time, y'all let me yes orno? And if I ask answer,
I asked no, and I askedwhy. Just give me a brief like
why, you know, because wewant to get the people on and I

(31:56):
just want to see if y'all alignedwith the Ladies of the Internet. Are
you ready number one Ladies of theInternet. And we know where this came
from. Cheesecake factory, first date? Yes or no? Yes? Okay,
so many options. What's a greatgreat give me a quick reason why?
No? We have so many betterrestaurants in the district. There's so
many Michelin star restaurants. Even ifyou don't want to go that expensive,

(32:19):
you don't have to go cheesecake factory. Okay. So we know a lot
of these on a lot of theseon these lists, will say, now,
okay, number two, Apple Bee'schilis no. Maybe maybe it's outside
Spot and the little Okay, OliveGarden, yes, the Breast, the

(32:50):
movies, Yes, your house.Any food, fast food Chaine, as
is the teacher, she answered likeone of her students. No, yes,
Buffalo wings, Yes, I woulddo it. It's like a football
game. Maybe wing stop. Thatwas not I said, what's that You

(33:14):
get wings from us place called wings? All right, let's get through.
A red lobster no, garlic bread, would lobster? A buffet? No?
Never, no back their buffet ishitting. Yes, come on,

(33:34):
you know that's not what they're talkingabout. Yes, yes, Denny's,
the gym, yes, church forthe first date. No, Starbucks,
yes, coffee dates just in general, ice cream dates yes, family functions
no, movie nights yes, okay, somewhere that requires a long drive no,

(33:59):
I some people forehand. Yes,yeah, somewhere the bowling yes.
Nightclubs yeah, yes, that's nottoo loud, right, Yes, a
bar for just drinks yes, yes, waffle house no the last one.

(34:19):
Sporting events yes, okay, cool. I love that say. CC said
yes to coffee, Starbucks, icecream. So it's not really just about
the fanciness. It's just like someplaces don't like chain restaurants. And one

(34:40):
thing, the guys on the internetresponded, and one thing, the one
part that I love is they saidthey don't want to be taken anywhere or
they don't want to take a womananywhere that serves Tomahawks takes smart because that's
what I'm ordering. So that isawesome. So I think we got some
people that are ready to join theconversation. Let's see, you want to

(35:02):
move to this chair right here andmake sure upstairs getting the drinks, you
know, get ready because we gotthe connection mixer coming up after this.
So we got the first person comein, Alexia. Can we just give
Alexi a big go round? Thankyou, thank you, awesome. You

(35:27):
look amazing. So can you firststart by telling us your name and then
what your relationship status is. Iam Carol and I'm recently single. Recent
So we're talking about dating because datinghere at the Line is something that we
know is awesome. You could doeverything here at the line, find your
love date, and get married.So we want to ask you what do
you think makes a good first date? Was on your vibes? I want

(35:47):
to do an activity. I wantto have a good time because it's weird,
we can still do something else andthere's not gonna be a lot of
awkward moments and tension in silence.Yeah, got you what's the best or
what's the best first date you wenton? And the worst first date you
went on. I'm gonna set withthe worst. Okay, let us know
the worst. Yes, So hedid the same thing. Went to dinner.
Everything was good. Someone set usup, so I'd already seen allegedly

(36:09):
what he looked like. You gotthe old photo. I blocked in.
He is not what I expected.So it's fine. I'm not. I
can still roll with it, youknow. So I tried it out,
sad, Everything was fine. Wentto the movies, everything was good too.
So then afterwards I was like,I'm gonna google him because you should,

(36:30):
like is that a normal thing thatwomen do everybody? Oh? Wow,
Yeah I did, And I sawhim on some site and when we
were talking about how he scammed themout of money, how he was crazy,
how he doesn't own his car,it was so I immediately blocked him,
like immediately blocked him. Does hislast name start with a W?
Honestly, I don't even remember hisname Angela the same day we might have.

(36:57):
We might have, but I don'tremember. It's like I've met him.
Yeah immediately, No, So Carol, you are recently single? Ye,
newly single? How are you feelinglike? Are you excited about being
newly single? Or are you likeI'm still healing in between. So it's
exciting to be back in the datinggame, but it's also like, don't

(37:20):
know, I'm on these days appsapps too, girl, It's it's a
little rough out here, a lotof nowadays. Yeah. Yes, And
everyone's on the same app, soyou run across the same people in every
single appy. Have you run intoanyone that already was connected to you on
a social media app and then likeswiped on you on the dating app?
No, I have, Okay,I've exchanged that, and I thought it

(37:42):
was very weird, like if yousee me on here, just go back
to the other He was doing thelike like like comment and you were checking
for him, so he was remember, okay, No, So we thank
you for joining us. I askedyou one last question with the list with

(38:02):
the lays with the Internet cheesecake factoryfirst date? Is that a yes or
no? I don't hate it,but I would like you to be more
creative. I would go, butI would like you to do something.
I like that answer, gotcha,So you'll go Just reluctantly, yes,
yes, yeah, I would go, I would take it. Yeah,

(38:23):
that was also kurat. Thank youso much for joining us and adding to
the conversation. We appreciate you talkingto us. All right, who got
up? Hello? Hello? Whatis your name? I'm Tiffany. How
is everyone nice to meet? Yourrelationship status? Tiffany, I'm married.

(38:45):
My husband's actually upstairs. So heyman, So I guess we could ask
that first question, how did youknow your husband? What's his name?
His name is Patrick? Patrick?You know, Patrick was the one.
Okay, good question. So wewere a very slow burn, so can
relate. We were friends for likesix to nine months before we started dating,

(39:05):
like officially. But it was likeone of those weird things where like
a number of my friends were like, you say, he's your coworker,
but why he's still around, Likewhy why we see him all the time?
Why you with him all the time? He was before I knew it.
But at the time we worked together, we started going to get our
MBA together. My last semester washis first, and we would like work
out in between work and going toschool. So it just was like a

(39:30):
very like a lot of time wespent together that just ended up, you
know, transpiring into the marriage.I guess the studying studies, study study,
cell work out, like you learna lot about people working out and
what you can palette and what youcan So what do you think makes a
good first date? I like,so I think similarly to you, I

(39:53):
like experiences, but I don't wantto be stuck in a car with someone
I don't know for an hour becauseif it's awkward, it's dead the water.
I think like trips to museums arecool. I think I think you
get Yeah, I really think youget to know a lot of like people's
like mindset, like what they thinkis beautiful, like what they think is

(40:14):
cool and unique. Buy experiences likethat. So that's like probably top of
my list and like cheat code withthe whole Oh, I don't have money
to date. Museums are free,especially here, and there's so many here,
beautiful ice cream usually outside, there'sfood trucks. Yeah, chains,

(40:37):
I'm cool. You could turn itinto a picnic. You can all full
circle here, and a lot ofthe museums have like very unique exhibits that
happen like every so often, soeven then you can still elevate it to
something new. Yeah, conversation andconnection what it's all about for sure?
For sure. Do anybody else haveany questions? I do? Okay,

(40:59):
how did you know your husband wasthe one? I just asked her that,
No, he did. What's thefirst question? Yeah, yeah,
the first question we were all here. It's okay, I think the story
of question. No, but Iknow what you mean, like, what

(41:23):
was the moment that told me thathe was my husband? So? After
I graduated my MBA, I was, I was I had to move to
New York for an internship and nothe moved me to New York. So
like I just like bizarre, Likethis man that like I have just literally
started dating like less than a month, and was like, I'm going to

(41:45):
move you to New York. He'sfrom New York. He's like, I'm
gonna like take this opportunity to showyou my city, Like I'm going to
make sure that you're comfortable before Ileave. And I feel like the extra
like cherry on top is that mydad let him. It's a man,
he said, Okay, pro protip out there, commitment A man be

(42:06):
committing before ring they do. Helets you know early and way before.
For sure. For sure relations didsomething similar to that. Like I was
here for like two months to planwas not at all to move in with
him, but things happened and hewas just like, girl, come on
over, and I was like,really, he really likes me. But
again it's like this is not justan average person. Yeah, because even

(42:29):
before we started dating, I waslike, I don't know, I'm about
to move to New York, LikeI don't really want to do the long
distance thing, and he was likeNew York is a long distance. Yeah,
five hour drive is a long distance. We can't give us a world.
That's commitment. That's commitment. Wecan go on exactly. So one

(42:49):
last question for you, Uh,we just got to ask cheesecake factory,
is that okay? For a firstday, you got all the options you
have, like the low calorie,all the cheese take options we know about,
right, you can have like ifyou just go for dessert, it's
this mortgage bord she called the chocolatebread. I'll be like keep that running.

(43:15):
Well, we thank you so muchfor all right, who we have
next, Alexia, Who's who's doingthe table? Who's doining the table?
All right? Look at the colors? Okay or canza very beautiful. It's

(43:39):
the diamond. Diamond, it's yourrelationship status. I will say that I'm
single and healing. We receive thattell us about that journey, like what
what does that look like for you? There's a lot of ups and down,

(44:00):
tears, praying. I'm just reallytrying to get closer to God.
Love that because honestly, I justfeel like it was the right person.
Wrong timing. You know, likewhen a person don't really know themselves or
they're just going through the motions andtrying to figure out who they are.
You know, men aren't mature.It doesn't matter if the older than you

(44:21):
are not for me into mature AndI feel like, really, that's what
the situation was. It was perfectperson, even though nobody's perfect, but
wrong timing. So right now we'rejust maintaining a healthy friendship and you know,
I just pray to God that hopefullyone day he comes back. You

(44:42):
know, been the black you canask. That was Brian's story. We
met one weekend randomly, you know, got drunk, had fun, and
then was it seven months later,eight months later, that's when we actually
came back. So it was justkind of the right person, but just
wrong time, and so it doeswork out that way sometimes. I was

(45:06):
only going to say because it's beenpopular and like with certain celebrities that have
been spending the black, is therelike a couple that you think is like,
oh, I'm so glad they gotback together. Oh honestly, I
would say, and like thee hisface, like theiness. But I do

(45:32):
think it took a long time forthem to get back. But I was
just like, you know, ifit could be that long, and you
know, it just looks like reallove. I'm here for, especially if
it's black love, and I lovethat. I'm a yo Gotti, Angela,
you know, because you put itin the song. You know,
boy, I got a crust,Angela Simmons. I'm gonna let the world

(45:55):
know. All right, that's thequestion for So you mentioned that you guys
are focusing on like friendship, Yeah, a healthy friendship, and you're also
healing. Yeah, how do you, I guess, like create boundaries to
make sure that the friendship doesn't interruptthe healing in a space of you having
like hope that like it's more thanfriends when if in this moment it's that's

(46:20):
a great question, and yeah,that's a very good question. So for
me, like I'm a helpless romantic, Like I don't like the whole distance
thing. I don't. But wehave really created a very healthy space,
Like it's no intimacy. If wedo see each other, you know,
we're walking in the park, youknow, we're actually having a conversation.
We don't go on any dates oranything of that nature. It's just like,

(46:44):
hey, do you want to justgo have a talk see like a
little ketchup. It's not like probablylike once in a blue moon, like
once every month or something like that. And we'll do like check ins here
and there. But it's distance becausethat's the way he wants to keep it.
So I'm just you know, respectinghis boundaries. But for me,
just keep me close. No.I love that. I love that.
It could be hard. That soundsso perfect. Number one key thing you

(47:07):
said is that y'all aren't being inthere like no intimacy, no no,
no, no, no no no. We're just friends. But it's really
hard though, because I'm just like, oh my god, you know,
and like I just like I said, I'm just really working on myself.
I'm in that work to like healand just become a better woman. I'm
constantly praying because you know, oneday, I do want to become a

(47:30):
mother. I want to become awife, and I don't think that I'm
ready or prepare right now. SoI'm just like, you know, God,
let me take the steps necessary forme to be that person in the
future. That's super super important.I felt like I was in that same
position when I was still toxic,secing I need to change, Like I

(47:50):
had to kind of like take astep back. I would celebrate for a
while, and I was like,I need to figure out myself because I
know the caliber man that I wantand I not yet that caliber woman.
So I needed to do some realdeep diving and some personal development within myself.
I had to go talk to somebodyabout it and then and and work
through any traumas you know. AndI think at that point is when I

(48:13):
really found the obviously my man,the right person for me. And that's
what I'm hoping now and all honestly, because like this year has been like
my ground work, like it's beenpreviously like oh, you know, like
I'm going to heal properly, butit's just like no, it's no Seliban
like I'm celibant. You know,I'm not dating, I'm not on I'm
right now on the social media detox. I've been doing that since January.

(48:37):
But I'm also a business owner.But my business is Diamonds Dazzling Cocktails.
I'm a mobile bartender. I've hadit for four years. Hey, girl
died just sitting back watching you likewow, Like that is so good and

(49:00):
beautiful and for you, thank you, thank you so much, thank you.
I appreciate one more question, donbefore you go Cheesecake factory first day
to no date for me? Please? Okay, that is my girl.
I love the cheese cheese. Butthe crazy thing about it is I don't
eat cheesecake. I don't. Hey, listen, they got the cheesecake fifteen

(49:23):
other pages of food Cheesecake Factory.Like. I love their little crab balls.
I like the little text mix eggrolls like you love the cheesecake Factory.
Like. I mean, I'm aseafood person, but I will never
knock the cheese. Like good foodis good food. Good drinks was good
drinks. I ain't that type ofperson. I'm humble. I'm humble.

(49:49):
I think we have a few morepeople that are joining us and then we're
gonna wrap up and have our connection. Been upstairs with R and B music,
everything like that. It was soso sweet. Look at the purple,
this is my guy. My Also, can you what's your what's your

(50:15):
name? Auntie and jel name twinwith my fans they said it was a
little warm. Can you let usknow your relationship status. I'm happily single,
Okay, have single? Why happily? You said happily because years ago

(50:37):
I used to put a ladder stigmaon being single, that I had to
be in a relationship by a certainagent. Now that I'm seasoned, I'm
happy with it. I mean,I will embrace if the opportunity to presented
itself. But I'm happy. Youknow, I don't I'm I don't want
to be oh I'm not with someoneand be big and you know you know

(51:01):
how, yes, some women canbe Oh. Well, I have a
question for you on Angi as aperson who like literally I wanted to be
like on Angi most of the mostof my childhood, Like she was so
involved in my life, like loveto come and do all the things,
very very feminine, very girly.She did our nails took us all the

(51:22):
cool spots. But I will say, although she was married and dated,
I always saw you as like avery regal, pulled together woman. And
so I feel like that plays apart into why you are so happily single,
Like you have a certain amount ofjust like self love and self energy.

(51:43):
Like she's a ball of fun.Seriously, y'all, she is aging
backwards. What do you do tolike take care of yourself so that you
can really be like happy and notlonely in your singleness. So with the
happily single part, it's just gettingto know who I am and appreciate you
who I am. So spending timewith me is like the utmost because I

(52:05):
feel that if you are single andyou're looking to date, you have to
date you. And if dating youis not fun, do some changing.
It's not gonna be fun. SoI like the pamper on me. I
like to do go get my sages, patticicures and just facials. And you
know, I'm the senior, butI get this from my baby. You

(52:28):
know, she does all these faceYou know I do this, And I
was like, you're gonna have totake me out to the store. You're
gonna have to tell Auntie this.So I've now incorporated that into mine.
Now I did it before, butnow as I'm getting older, you know,
skin changes, so you you gottado things just dam it different.
So yeah, yeah, she knowsI love it. I love it.

(52:52):
So one question for you. Youcould school us, you know, because
like I said, we talked aboutthe ladies that are Internet. I don't
know if you heard the list ofall the restaurants that they said they want
to go to on the first date. What what? What do you think
it is a good first date numberone? And then also cheesecake factory.
Yes or no? I would docheese cake Factory. You know, I'm
not putting a stigma on where someonetakes me. As long as you not

(53:15):
take me to the corner store whenI got to sit outside wait for you
bring food out. You know,I would be okay with that, but
let me know ahead of time.You know, you have to prepare for
that. Yeah, I'll do cheesecake Factory. Gotcha? Got you?
Well, we appreciate you joining usand sitting down and having this conversation with
us. Let me slide out thecheese. So we're about to come to

(53:39):
a conclusion soon, and I thinkwe have a few, like two more
people and then we'll kind of closeout and join our conversations. So who
we got? Did we get anymen? There's right there? Come on,
bab, come on, Sean head, there's another well start out.
I just saw a well he's startingus ut Sean baby. Everybody welcome mister

(54:07):
Hannah with his fine. So,okay, we're just gonna keep it quick
because I know Sean don't want to. We're just gonna keep it quick.
Sean. I just want to know, for for the people out here,
there's a lot of women who areout here single, who are looking for

(54:29):
a man. How did you knowthat Angela was somebody you wanted to spend
the rest of your life with.Ah, that's a great question. I
can't really pinpoint like at certain time, but I would say I don't know.
I had this makeup of what Ithought the perfect girl was. She

(54:50):
fit most of that. So that'skind of how I knew. I was
at a point in my life whereI knew that certain things didn't matter,
like oh how big is her butt? Like what's her bus side? She's
like watching out? I was checking, I was checking so I was like,

(55:12):
as long as I can grab something, I'm good. But yeah,
I don't know. I was ata point where like I was stopped looking
for the little small can I cuss? I can't cuss the little small stuff?
And I started like seeing the bigpicture. I had a son,
So the way I looked at thingsa little different got you that kind of

(55:37):
said the same thing. She waslike, I can't say that. Oh
I do know. I'm sorry,take that back. So I'm kind of
I'm even killed. No female neverrattled me. I was cool, calm,
cool, collected, but her likeshe got me out my box.

(55:57):
And that's why I'm like, damn, like, how am I letting her
get to me like this? SoI think that's when I really knew,
like she's challenging me in a wayand it's showing me that I care for
her because I'm like, I wouldn'thave done that with another girl. That's
when I really knew like she wasthe one. I love that. I
love that, I appreciate. Iappreciate that we got one more person coming

(56:24):
in. I wanted to just geta respect. I do want to say
that you had one thing wrong.We did. We did talk before what
you was on the phone, like, I remember almost falling asleep. I'm
like, damn, I want toget off the phone, and you kept
talking. Was this before? Thiswas the night? But yeah, it

(56:44):
was the first before the first datemight be right, but we all know
in relationships that whenever you ask coupleshow we met stories, it's always a
difference. So I think we gotone more person coming in and then we're
gonna get ready for the connection event. Food. We have one more person

(57:06):
coming. Yes, come, Ohmy gosh, I recognize you. Yes,
we are cam Oh my gosh,I love it. You have a
couple. You are first couple toenter the broom. Let us know your

(57:28):
names, and you know your relationshipstatus. We assume it's together, but
tell us. I mean, I'mKim, my name is Keith, the
whole thing, and you are anitem? Married okay? Not married?
Not married? Gage? Okay?How long have you been together? All

(57:52):
right? How long have you guysbeen together? Almost Marshal makes two years?
Okay? Also we met around thistime, like Black Friday, Black
Friday two years ago? Also awesome, So anniversary coming up? Oh,
and I'm sure you're probably planning somethingnice maybe to do for your anniversary,

(58:13):
maybe something involving food. Now,this is a little twist on the question
because this isn't the first date,this is an anniversary date. Would you
be okay with going to cheesecake factoryto celebrate your anniversary? No, I'm
with you. I wouldn't want to. I feel like at this point we've

(58:34):
already had like a couple out ofcountry trips. So I mean for the
anniversary you, I mean, ifit's a regular day, you gotta do
that. But girls, you saidexperiences I got last year we did Costa
Rica and then for me again nothing, no harm. I love escake,
but not for anniversary. Happy Yeahwe were on my birthday. Was fun

(58:57):
a little bit say go through,but no, we love that. Love
that. So one of the topicshere we talked about date night at the
line you could do everything here,fall in love, date, have a
wedding. So I mean, thisis the case. I'll and if y'all
looking for a place. But Iwant to know what your first date was.
So we we went wine tasting andafter we went and we went to

(59:24):
the restaurant's side. Yeah, sowe had like a good couple of hours.
You know, good convo. Andit was funny because actually went on
the date a couple of days beforethat. She tried to curtain. I
was like, no, I ain'tletting this. Oh a persistent man,
Keith. I like you like welike we do? We do? Like

(59:45):
that? We do? We do? I just wandn't place. I was
ready to date. I was veryover and then it was like that little
like just go, girl, justgo. When he said wine, I'm
like, he loved me. You'redrinking wine, right, She's drink wine
my candy. Yeah, and thenboom and here we are. How did
you? Because I hear guys saythis sometimes, like planning dates. They're
like, oh, it's really hardor should I ask her? Like That's

(01:00:07):
happened to me several times, andI'm not gonna lie. It's slightly irritating.
When it's like, well, whatdo you want to do? I'm
like, I don't want to tellyou what you should take me to.
I want you to figure it out. So did you have her input?
Did you know she like wine?Or did you just think this would be
a really nice experience? Honestly,it was it was more of the experience
because at that point it was probablylike a week of like two weeks oatur

(01:00:30):
we first met, so it wasa little too soon to realize like what
she would and would have liked.So, I mean, I figured the
worst thing somebody can say is no, you's got a shooting shot. So
all the single man upstairs, pleasehave some keys vibes. Okay, why
my shot? No. I lovethat. We appreciate you sitting down with

(01:00:52):
us and sharing a couple's perspective.We're about to start our connection event soon.
I think we got one more personthat I want to have sit down.
I don't know where's at, butI think Randy is coming soon.
But I appreciate you guys from sittingdown and giving a couples perspective. And
we're gone upstairs. We're gonna havefun and we're gonna, you know,
have you wine appreciate Okay, thankyou for sure. So we're getting ready

(01:01:16):
to come to a close. Iknow we have a lot of people that's
coming in. I see a lotof our friends rolling in. Hey,
Barby, Hey queen. I'm superexcited. Like I said, I'm waiting
for one more person to come through, and then we're just gonna do a
little toast just to start the nightoff. But just a reminder that upstairs,
after we finished this podcast, we'regonna have a dope Connection event.

(01:01:37):
Every single table has a topic onit that you can discuss. It's like
travel, lifestyle, restaurants, likeall different things that we could talk about,
and then there's games and all thedifferent places too. So we want
to make sure that everybody's just outhere connecting. Of course you can have
your phones out, take a fewpictures, but remember, we here to
connect and we got some good musgoing. We're here to unplugged, and

(01:01:57):
we're super excited to have everybody out. So we have to have a little
a little drinking drink now, Yes, you know, I don't dream.
It was a good time and thisis perfect. The last guest that I
wanted to have come in is myfriend. Yes, great, the beauty

(01:02:21):
that is in this room right now. Yes, we got to say thank
you Lauren because she's in the roomreally quickly. You don't mind if we
take a drink for Lauren than yousomething. So I'm so excited Randon.
I wanted to have you on.Obviously you're doing a lot. We've met
before. I was on your show. Yes, you were. So I
feel like it's only right that youcome on this show. I'm flattered you

(01:02:45):
did such an awesome job on myshow. I appreciate I appreciate it.
So we're talking about love, dating, everything, So I just want to
get some of your perspective, soeverybody doesn't know what's your relationship status.
A little pause. It's complicated.I've been married for a very long time.
Okay, and yes, and I'mstill best friends. And I say

(01:03:09):
it's complicated separated now, got you? Damn I'm stuttering and shit. Okay,
Okay, take us, if youdon't mind, take us through that
journey, because I know a lotof times when we do get married,
we have this like just idea ofwhat is going to be, it's going
to last forever, but sometimes youhave those moments to where you do grow

(01:03:30):
apart. Like can you talk alittle bit about that and just like how
you work through that, you knowthat idea that you had, you know
when you first begin Yeah, welllisten, I mean I was married for
a long long time. I meanlike almost thirty years. I mean long
time. I got married very young. I wouldn't say we grew apart.
The crazy thing about us is everyonesays, you want to be with your
best friend. He is my bestfriend. We're more in the same day.

(01:03:50):
We get along fine, we don'targue, like it's perfect. But
I think sometimes you need with aromantic partner to have that that kind of
like that like that passion. Andso people say, I want to be
with my best friend, but youkind of want to be with your best
friend and the person that wants toven you over the sink when you come
home after dinner. Right, youdo what I'm saying, Wait, where

(01:04:14):
is my Yeah, yeah, youcan all toast to that. I think
that's the thing that you have tokeep in mind, is you still want
that that that whatever. And soI don't have a horror story I tell
people, I you know, Imean, that's still like my dog,
like we're still very very close,and you know, maybe we'll get that
again. But that's something you haveto work on. And I just wasn't

(01:04:40):
willing to just be just be bestfriends. I wanted something more than that.
Right. He was cool with itas it was, right, but
I'm still I think I think,particularly you know, we've raised kids,
you've you've done it right, andso now I'm ready to like lit,
be butt naked on a beach andright, and you're just ready because you've

(01:05:02):
done all the things. And sometimespeople are like, well, I'm kind
of happy in this nice, settledlife, and for some people that is
what they want. That has neverbeen who I was. You know,
So even within our marriage, likeour baby shower went to four am,
we had, you know, bartenderson every level, Like I always wanted

(01:05:23):
our marriage to be a reflection ofwho we were and not us giving up
who we were like one big party. And so I think that's where things
went somewhat askew, if you wouldcall it that, But it really almost
feels like I think it was y'alltoo young to though. But Ruby de
and Ausley Davis said there's several divorceswithin one marriage, and I think that

(01:05:45):
something that people are never honest aboutis like there may be one day or
one week they think you don't likea partner, but you might have three
years, you might have two yearswhere you were like, man, twenty
to twenty two was shit for us, like we weren't good right, and
you just sometimes you may have totake take a time out and just say
let's just regroup, reconnect. AndI don't think people are honest with that

(01:06:09):
that yeah wow, So sometimes youcould be together but not together, if
that makes sense, still committed butnot. It's it's weird, but people
try to act like things like marriageand things are so simple, and I
believe that it sets people up forfailure because it's not simple. It's not
simple. So you're always kind oftrying to like renegotiate. That's what I

(01:06:32):
said. You're always renegotiating the contractand saying what works for us as we
are now? Yeah, got you? I love I told you so insightful,
so insightful. So we are hereat the line and it's all about
date night at the line and finda love at the line. So I
want to know for you, whatdo you feel like makes a great first
day? Oh? You know,I would like someone will surprise me,

(01:06:59):
like you know, I like spontaneous. I'm with you, like if you're
at dinner and someone's like, youknow what, this is good, but
let's go let's go somewhere else,right, And that I want like excitement
and I'm a passion at it,which is something I've got to be honest
about. So surprise me. Yeah, like, and let's just like go
with the flow and someone where youhave a good, just connection. There's

(01:07:24):
so much you can't predict our form, like the date could be perfect,
but you feel no connection. Yougot to have that. Okay, that's
literally what makes like you just wantto be on a date where you never
wanted to end. That's how thatto me, that's the best perfect first
date where it's like I just don'twant this and it feels like it doesn't

(01:07:46):
end. It's like we're doing anotherthing and another thing, you know,
you know what. That's all I'vehad, though I've never really dated a
lot. It's like my date andthen we go together. And that's what
literally happened on my first day andwe talked about it. Sorry guys,
sorry bab, but I am oneof those who slept with my husband on
the first day too. Okay.I denied it for a while because I

(01:08:09):
was like, no, it didn'treally happen. Oh, it happened,
it's really And I was drunk,very drunk, but I wasn't drunk to
the point where I couldn't remember.Yes, it's because I didn't want the
day to end. I also didn'twant be chastised by my roommate, but
I wanted I didn't. I wantedto stay with him. I hate rules.
I can like I have this sayingthat like when my husband and I

(01:08:32):
first started dating, I never left, and I really, I really never
left. That's kind of like thathe lived in a beautiful apartment in like
downtown d C. And I waslike, this is nice. I want
to stay here now and I did, right. I never laughed and he
never and he did want me toleave you. And that proves that what
they say about when a man knowshe wants you, they want you,
and it's like sure, like immediatelythey know. And that I don't like

(01:08:55):
rules where people say don't sleep withthe man until the third whatever. I
know I want to sleep with youthat day. Then I don't. We
don't need a second date because Ishould be like this, like like if
I don't feel it, and yeah, I should be thinking about like I
should be thinking about it. Yeah, awesome, awesome. Well we're about
to start connection being upstairs, butI want you to plug everything that you

(01:09:16):
got going on, because you haveconversation cards, you have like a lot
of stuff going on before we headup. Well, you know you've been
on my show Truthing with Randy B. Where we do this, we get
together, we tell our truths likeno bullshit, I think is what it's
about. And so the show isbeing shopped right now. I think you're
going to see it in some dopeplaces really soon. YEA, look out
a you for joining us. Appreciatebusiness. We appreciate you so much.

(01:09:47):
All right, So guys, we'rejust going cheers, Yes, let's cheers.
Great successful first live stairs until sinceto you too. Everybody upstairs,
we're about to come upstairs. We'reabout to have drinks. It's gonna be
music, games, food, We'rejust gonna have a great time. Meet
somebody new. I don't know ifyou saw the little black cards, but

(01:10:10):
you gotta connect just three rules.Got to connect three new people. Yeah,
and the rules for upstairs are thatevery table has a conversation topic,
travel, entertainment, live events,and there's questions on that table. So
make sure you go out and youask those questions, talk to the people

(01:10:30):
around you, and we won't havea good time. Were about to come
up, so appreciate all y'all.But coming out and we're gonna have a blast,

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