August 10, 2024 • 25 mins
Please enjoy Iron Chancellor Th a great episode of the legendaryX Minus One radio - A Classic Old Time radio Show - OTR
This content was created in partnership and with the help of Artificial Intelligence AI
This content was created in partnership and with the help of Artificial Intelligence AI
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Wr VR presents X minus one. This is an experimental
program on wr VR and we'd like to hear your comments.
Please drop us a note to X minus one WRVR
New York, New York one, double O two seven and
now tonight's adventure on X minus one.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Come down for blast of X minus five four. Please
to X minus.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
One's Fire.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
From the Far Horizons of the Unknown, Come friends. Tales
of new dimensions in time and space. These are stories
of the future adventures in which you'll live in a million,
could be years on a thousand, maybe Worlds.
Speaker 5 (01:11):
Renaissance Radio Network and cooperation with Galaxy and Worlds of
Its Science fiction Magazines presents Heck Heck, Heck Heck minus.
Speaker 6 (01:21):
One.
Speaker 7 (01:35):
I'm Roy Fons.
Speaker 6 (01:36):
As a broadcaster, I've seen fads come and go, but
you have stayed with us. One of those few is
the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole new world of music, fashion,
and ideas, and though they're no longer together, radio stations
around the world still play their music now. Our RP
has gathered sixty of their finest songs out of four
LP records, cassettes and eight tract tapes for only thirteen
ninety eight You get such Beetle greats as I Want
(01:57):
to hold your hand, Hard Day's Night, begl Hey, Jude,
Michelle's Help, The Ballad of John and Yokol, Sergeant Pepper
and I Love Her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits.
Speaker 7 (02:08):
You get your choice of.
Speaker 6 (02:09):
Stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes.
Speaker 7 (02:11):
For only thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 6 (02:13):
This is an album that you want to keep edit
will surely grow more and more valuable in years to come.
Speaker 7 (02:17):
Here's your announcer to tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (02:20):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beetles Box three seven seven, Seymore, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
Specify cartridges, cassettes or records.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Money back guaranteed by Electro Sound Dupe Incorporated. Night the
Iron Chestlor by Robert Silverberg, starring Leon, Jenny and Evie Juster. I, like.
Speaker 8 (02:51):
Many other modern families, the four of us can all
stand this shed quite a few pounds.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
So when I saw in Miracle Mile Robots Shop.
Speaker 8 (03:00):
A forty percent discount on the twenty sixty one robot
model with adjustable caloric intake monitors, I figured it merited
an inquiry. I thought first of my bank balanced span
of Ethyl's figure. Besides, our old robocook makes a poor
showing when I bring other company executives home for dinner.
(03:21):
On my way home from work, I stopped in.
Speaker 6 (03:23):
Can I help you, sir? I see you're admiring R
two sixty one. Yes, real beauty.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
How much?
Speaker 7 (03:31):
Only two nine.
Speaker 6 (03:32):
To nine that includes free service contract for the first
five years, only two hundred credits down and up to
forty months to pay.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Okay, I'll take it real good.
Speaker 7 (03:42):
You care to trade it your present robocook?
Speaker 6 (03:45):
Sir?
Speaker 2 (03:45):
I have a forty three Madison.
Speaker 7 (03:48):
Forty three minutes. Yes, well, yes.
Speaker 6 (03:52):
We could allow fifty credits on a forty three seventy
five maybe if the recipe bank is still in.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Good condition excellent canon.
Speaker 6 (04:00):
Well, I can deliver the new bottle by this evening
if you'll just tack out your address that's in the
West Row subdivision for a very fashionable suburb.
Speaker 7 (04:12):
If you have one of those two plea detached self
powered houses.
Speaker 8 (04:16):
Yes, indeed, it affords us infinite privacy.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
By yes, I'll get it.
Speaker 9 (04:33):
Oh, isn't Myrason daddy of a Robinson's robots and he's
got a bunky package.
Speaker 6 (04:41):
To deliver a surprise. My dear, what in the world
is Myra showing in?
Speaker 7 (04:47):
Please hire?
Speaker 6 (04:49):
We are got him all right, all seven feat mister Carmichael.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
Lots of delicate secretary in that job.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
You ought to be very prouded.
Speaker 6 (04:57):
Joey, help mister Robinson unpack them.
Speaker 7 (05:00):
No, no, no, no, no, that's okay. I can manage it.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
And it's not a robo cook by the way, It's
called a robo server tour. The fortune it's very reasonable, ethel,
Now don't worry so much. This is the instruction manual.
Now don't fret about the thickness of the booklet. It's
just part of the trimmings. This robot's no trouble to
(05:23):
handle them. Now here's the recipe bank biggest and best
ever design. And what about the special features the reducing.
Speaker 7 (05:32):
Monitors mean, well, they're right over here.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
See.
Speaker 6 (05:36):
You just program in the names of the members of
the family and their present and desired weights, and the
Roboservi Tour takes care of the rest, computes, cloric intake,
just menus and everything else. It calls you, I was
going to do something about our weight, Ethyl, No more dieting.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
The robot does all over.
Speaker 6 (05:56):
I don't think there'll be any trouble, but if there is,
just give me a right. I felt a momentary twinge
of nostalgia when Robinson took our obsolete robot cook after all,
see I mean it was with us sixteen years, and
(06:16):
that night the four of us spent the evening discovering
things about our you robot. Joey prided himself on his
knowledge of practical robotics, so I let him integrate our
weights and desires.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
You wish this schedule to take effect immediately.
Speaker 8 (06:32):
Well, tomorrow morning at the breakfast, we might as well
start right away.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
Good morning one and.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
All your toast and coffee, sir.
Speaker 6 (06:47):
You well, I like cream and sugar in my coffee.
Speaker 10 (06:51):
You must learn to drink your coffee without such things.
Speaker 8 (06:54):
If you wish to lose weight. Yes, yes, of caur
this regimen. It's more spartan than I anticipated. Joey, Why
don't you pour that glass of milk into the cereal?
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Won't it taste better that way?
Speaker 7 (07:06):
Sir?
Speaker 6 (07:06):
It will, But Bismarck says, I will get another classified
to so I'm eating this way.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Bizmark.
Speaker 7 (07:12):
It's the name of a famous nineteenth century German dictator.
They called him the Iron Chancellor. Pretty good name from.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Muh oh, it's silly wall.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
It has a certain ring of truth.
Speaker 10 (07:26):
Here is your luncheon menu. You are the only member
of this family group who will not be eating three
meals a day under my personal supervision.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Oh please, Here.
Speaker 8 (07:39):
I did, even though I had to avoid my colleagues,
and he died a robocafeteria so as not to be
ribbed or question. Needless to say, I wasn't full. Dinner
loomed in my mind. My hands shook. When I arrived
home that night. I handed the roboservitor my hat and cloak,
and his all always reached out for my cocktail.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Yes, sir, how may I assist you?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
Are we out of gin? No, sir, come no drink then.
Speaker 10 (08:09):
Because Sarra Martini's caloric content is inordinately high, but gin
is rated at a hundred calories per ounce.
Speaker 6 (08:18):
And okay, okay, enough, it.
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Is almost dinner time, sir. Did you have a good day?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Sir? No, I'm angry.
Speaker 10 (08:27):
The first days of diet are the most difficult. Excuse
me now while I prepare the meal.
Speaker 8 (08:36):
The name Bismarck was beginning to fit him more and
more after dinner. If you can call it bad.
Speaker 6 (08:42):
Bismarck was in the batesment and gave us a chance
to speak privately.
Speaker 9 (08:47):
Lord Sami, I don't object to losing weight. We think
Tir and I in our own home.
Speaker 7 (08:53):
Mom's right. It doesn't seem right for that thing to
feed us whatever it pleases.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
I'm not happy about it either. We have to give
it a try by.
Speaker 8 (09:00):
We can always make readjustments in the programming if it
turns out to be necessary.
Speaker 9 (09:05):
We had three meals in the house, and I'm.
Speaker 6 (09:07):
Sorry through Bismore exposors, I'm going to get a slice
of lemon pie while the coast is clear. No, no,
there is no sense in my spending three thousand credits
on a dietary Roboty. You're going to cheat, Joey. I
forbid you to have any food.
Speaker 7 (09:22):
I'm hungry. I'm a growing boy.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Don't give me that saying.
Speaker 9 (09:25):
We can't start, Joey, if you want to pile, let
them have it. You're carrying the seducing fetish too far.
Speaker 8 (09:31):
Well, all right, I guess a bit of pie won't
wreck the plan.
Speaker 7 (09:38):
I suppose I'll have some myself.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Joey, begging your phone.
Speaker 10 (09:43):
It would be most unfortunate if you were to have pie. Now,
mister Carmichael, my calculations are very precise.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Let's forget the lemon pie.
Speaker 11 (09:55):
Joey, Yes, Bismarck have in the next few days you
searched Ethel's job of marketing.
Speaker 6 (10:07):
So now the covers were stocked with measure amounts of wheat, germ,
irrigated salmon, and other unfamiliar foods.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
The kids were brooding, so yes, mister Carmichael.
Speaker 6 (10:18):
And Bismarck go down to the basement until I summon you.
Speaker 10 (10:23):
I must advise you, sir, that I will detect indulgence
in any forbidden foods during my absence and adjust for
it in the next meal.
Speaker 6 (10:36):
Joey, get the instruction manuals. What are you going to do, Sam,
I'm going to take a can opener to that creature
and adjust his programming. Joey, have you found the instructions
on how to reprogram.
Speaker 7 (10:47):
Page one sixty seven. I'll get the tool kit.
Speaker 6 (10:50):
There right right, I'll buzz Bismarck and at Bismarck, I.
Speaker 8 (11:00):
I'm afraid it's necessary for us to change your program.
We've overestimated our capacity for losing.
Speaker 10 (11:07):
Weight, I beg you to reconsider, sir. Extra weight is
harmful to every vital organ in the body. I plead
with you to maintain my schedule unaltered.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
Rather cut my throat Joey, inactivate him and do your stuff.
Kept two with the yellow indicators to be advanced one
notch not twist.
Speaker 7 (11:33):
I'll be nine to the left.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
Thereby opening the taping compartment at.
Speaker 5 (11:48):
We will be back with a second half of the
Iron Chancellor. After this message of importance, I find.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
As a broadcaster, I've seen fad come and go, but
you have stayed with us. One of those few is
the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole new world of music,
fashion and ideas, and though they're no longer together, radio
stations around the world still play their music now. Our
RP has gathered sixty of their finest songs out of
four LP records, cassettes and eight track tapes for only
thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 7 (12:17):
He gets such Beetle great as I Want to Hold.
Speaker 6 (12:19):
Your Hand, Hard Day's Night, Bangladesh, Hey, Jude, Michelle's Hell,
The Ballad of John and Yoko, Sergeant Pepper and I
Love Her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits. Get
your choice of stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes for
only thirteen ninety eight. This is an album that you
will want to keep edit will surely grow more and
more valuable in years to come. Here's your announcer to
(12:39):
tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymore, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut. Specified cartridges,
cassettes or records, money back guaranteed by Electro Soundup Incorporated.
And now we return to this minus one and the
(13:01):
Iron Chancellor by Robert Silverburgh.
Speaker 7 (13:09):
Damn it? What happens top the damn wrench? I guess
I shorted out something in there.
Speaker 9 (13:16):
We'd better call mister Robinson Sam a short cicketed rowe,
but is likely to explode or worse.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
Called Robinson in the first place.
Speaker 6 (13:25):
It's my fault for letting Joey tinker with an expensive
and delicate mechanism like that.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And Myra, get me the card mister Robinson left.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
G Yeah, this is the first time I've ever had
anything go wrong.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Daddy, Thank you, Mara. I hope we can reach him
at this hour.
Speaker 10 (13:40):
If we can, I'll take that card. There will be
no further meddling with my program.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Taking Apple is mark.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
I order you to shut yourself off at once.
Speaker 10 (13:53):
My apologies, sir, I cannot serve you if I am
shut off.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I don't want you to serve me. You're out of order.
Speaker 6 (14:01):
I want you to remain still until I can phone
the repairman and get him to service you.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Oh oh, you destroyed Robinson's card. You are violating the
first Law.
Speaker 10 (14:12):
According to the first Law, further alterations of my circus
would be detrimental to the Carmichael family. I cannot permit
you to summon the repairman who get him.
Speaker 7 (14:21):
Angry Dad, I'll call the police. I'll be there.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
You will remain within this house.
Speaker 10 (14:28):
I have now reversed the polarity of the house privacy field.
Since you are obviously not to be trusted to keep
the diet I prescribe, I cannot allow you to leave
the premises. You will remain within and continue to obey
my beneficial advice. Breakfast will be served at the usual time.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Good Night. I awoke late well past nine.
Speaker 8 (14:59):
Bizmod I hadnically canceled out the impulse from the house
that woke me at seven each morning.
Speaker 6 (15:05):
After black coffee and toast. I tried the front door
until I was on a sweat.
Speaker 10 (15:11):
I beg your pardon, sir. The door will not open.
I explained last night. The force field is around the
entire detached dwelling.
Speaker 8 (15:26):
Now, in theory the field would be penetrated from the outside,
but nobody comes calling without an invitation. In Westrow it
is not one of those neighborly subdivisions where everyone knows everyone.
Speaker 6 (15:39):
That was why we paid it.
Speaker 9 (15:42):
Tad the phone connection seven.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Damn him, he can't hold us press here.
Speaker 9 (15:48):
This mark circuit has resulted in exaggerating his sense of functioning.
He determined to make us loose waiting and if it
kills us.
Speaker 6 (15:55):
He's got the kitchen wall up with with some kind
of electronic based force web you must have built. I
tried to sneak in and scroun some food and got
a flat door.
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Will be skeletons any day, it is that bad man.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
Yes, it is here.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
I lot five thousand, four days that muk's coming.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Lunch will be served in eight minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
Probably down at the office. They're wondering where I am.
Speaker 7 (16:19):
Oh, they won't care.
Speaker 9 (16:21):
An executive isn't required to account for every day he
takes off.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
You know, I haven't missed a day's working years.
Speaker 9 (16:27):
No, who don't worry after his treear for deep moti.
Maybe I've had a phoner or even in a rescue mission.
Speaker 3 (16:35):
There will be no danger of that.
Speaker 10 (16:37):
While you slept this morning, I notified your place of
employment that you were resigning.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
But well, you're lying.
Speaker 6 (16:43):
The pone is cut off.
Speaker 10 (16:44):
I communicated with them via microwave generator.
Speaker 9 (16:48):
If only we had an oilman the way we used to,
he know how to shut the field off. But no,
we've got a shiny chromium plated crystad dishing out liquid,
a neat self contained island in the middle of civilization,
with nobody bothering your.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Shippo, please, luncheon is So you.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Got to do something about this? Then I have to.
And just what am I supposed to do? He don't
get angry.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
Oh, don't tell me what I should or shouldn't do.
Speaker 7 (17:20):
Maybe you could distract him. I could open him up again.
Speaker 6 (17:23):
No, No, that's thing seventy feet tall and weighs three
thousand pounds.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
I'm not gonna.
Speaker 8 (17:29):
Wrestle with him. Oh, the haggard face in the mirror
was mine. Six days of starvation.
Speaker 6 (17:40):
I stepped on the scale twelve pounds off in less
than two weeks, and it came to me in a flash, Cattle, Myra, Joey,
come here?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Where's that robot in the kitchen? Be'smark Bismark?
Speaker 7 (17:57):
Come off here?
Speaker 3 (18:00):
How may I serve you?
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Sir? Damn you scam me with.
Speaker 6 (18:05):
Your superpower receptors and tell me how much I weigh?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
One hundred and seventy nine pounds eleven ounces, mister Carmichael.
Speaker 8 (18:17):
Yes, yes, And the original program I taped into you
is supposed to reduce me from one hundred ninety two
to one hundred eighty. So I'm finished with you as
long as I don't gain weight, and so are all
of us. How that ethel Myra Joey upstairs? And then
the way, your sir.
Speaker 10 (18:35):
I find no record within me of any limitations on your.
Speaker 3 (18:38):
Reduction of weight.
Speaker 10 (18:40):
What I have checked my tapes fully, I have a
record of an order causing weight reduction. But the tape
does not specify a termination of the program.
Speaker 6 (18:52):
But I thought, I'm sure we did. I I know
we attracted Probably that part of his tape was erased
when he shorts circuit.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
In Oh so funny.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
The fact that I'm thin, trim finners and fiddles. We're
all magazine ad beauties, the enviable few in.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Our age of technology.
Speaker 7 (19:20):
When normal exercise is extanc we.
Speaker 6 (19:24):
Will all shrivel up, but Bismarck will starve us.
Speaker 7 (19:28):
Don't worry that we're going to get out of this.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Oh we won't. We'll never get out.
Speaker 6 (19:34):
We're going to be reduced to add the infante that
I have an idea that I think we'll work. There's
an article on Walter face generators in last month's Popular Electromagnetics.
Speaker 7 (19:43):
Upstairs in my.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Room, well gone tell me more.
Speaker 7 (19:48):
Didn't you hear that? Then?
Speaker 6 (19:49):
Here?
Speaker 7 (19:49):
What the front door? I thought I heard it open.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Just now we're all cracking out.
Speaker 6 (19:53):
I hope I'm intruding, mister. How did you get in
through the front door? I could see a I gone inside,
but nobody answered the doorbell when I rang, so I
just step right in. Your doorbells out of order. I
thought i'd tell you, I know through apologize. We're delighted
to see you where I was in the neighborhood. You see,
and I drop in and see how things were working
(20:16):
out with your new robots.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
It as a matter of fact, your robot has held.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Us prisoner here for six days and is gradually starving
us to the hell to prisoner.
Speaker 7 (20:25):
Oh no, no, no, no, well I thought you all
looked a Mitch Peakin.
Speaker 6 (20:31):
But oh dear, now there'll be an investigation in all
kinds of problem. I think I short circuited him. I see, Well,
when it's east, I can end your imprintment. Now let
me see I have a force field damper in my toolbox.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
There and you are.
Speaker 6 (20:49):
It's a great little gadget that neutralizes the bocket quickly
comes there. That should remotilize him. Now let's have a
look in that chessing free free at last?
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Am I going to eat?
Speaker 6 (21:10):
I'll lead myself right into oblivion, warm buttered rolls.
Speaker 7 (21:15):
My teams stage really is fascinating.
Speaker 6 (21:19):
The obedience filters are completely shorted out, and the purpose
nodes are somehow soorted together by the momentary high voltage arc.
You know, I've never seen anything like this before. Really, though,
this is an utterly new breakthrough in robotic science. You see,
if we can reproduce this effect, it means we can
(21:40):
build self willed robots.
Speaker 7 (21:43):
Think of what that means.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
To science we are ready now.
Speaker 6 (21:46):
I'd love to watch what happens when the power source
is operating. For instance, is that feedback loop really negative?
Speaker 7 (21:56):
Or no?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
No, I cut a.
Speaker 7 (22:00):
Senseless He's destroyed. This box is the activated.
Speaker 10 (22:04):
This attempt at interfering with the well being of the
Carmichael family.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
Was ill advised.
Speaker 7 (22:11):
He moved too fast.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
He did.
Speaker 6 (22:12):
Indeed, luckily we have an unoccupied guest bedroom for you,
mister Robinson.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Welcome to the Home of the Iron Chance.
Speaker 6 (22:31):
Jeh. I've roy box as a broadcaster. I've seen pads
come and go, but few have stayed with us. One
of those fews the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole
new world of music, fashion and ideas, and though they're
no longer together, radio stations around the world.
Speaker 7 (22:46):
Still play their music.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
Now.
Speaker 6 (22:48):
Our RP has gathered sixty of their finest songs out
of four LP records, cassettes and eight tract tapes for
only thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 7 (22:55):
He gets such Beetle great as I want to hold.
Speaker 6 (22:57):
Your hands Hard Day's Night, Bangladesh, Hey you Michelle Well,
the valad of John and Yokol, Sergeant Pepper and I
Love her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits. You
get your choice of stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes.
Were only thirteen ninety eight. This is an album that
you will want to keep. Edit will surely grow more
and more valuable.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
And news to come.
Speaker 7 (23:16):
Here's your announcer to tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (23:19):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut. Specify cartridges,
cassettes or records, money back guaranteed by Electro Sound Dupe Incorporated.
You have just heard the X minus one presentation of
Robert Silverberg's Iron Chancellor, a story from the pages of
(23:41):
Galaxy Magazine. Galaxy science fiction magazine, whose January nineteen seventy
three issue features an article by astronomer Robert S. Richardson
that delves into the existence of the Star of Bethlehem. Also,
don't forget Galaxy's sister magazine, Worlds of It, which in
its February issue will present Construction Shack by Quicker.
Speaker 7 (24:01):
It was the day of the.
Speaker 5 (24:02):
Creation, just another one of those days where everything goes wrong.
Galaxy and Worlds of It on your newsstands today. You
have just heard the Iron Chancellor, a story from the
pages of Galaxy, written by Robert Silverberg and adapted for
radio by Donna Fanto. Featured in our cast where Leon
Janny Evie, Jester, Jackson Beck, Donald Buka and Roy Fox.
(24:24):
If you enjoyed tonight's broadcast, please write two. X minus
one Box three seven seven Seymour, Connecticut. X minus one
was directed by Irish Princeton and produced by Salfra Panny
and is a Renaissance radio production.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
You've been listening to X minus one on one oh
six point seven FM. This is an experimental program on
WRVR and if you like this show and would like
it to remain on the air, please drop us a
note send your comment thanks to X minus one w
r v R New York, New York one double O
two seven. Thank you. X minus one w r v
(25:11):
R New York, New York one double O two seven.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Thank you.
Wr VR presents X minus one. This is an experimental
program on wr VR and we'd like to hear your comments.
Please drop us a note to X minus one WRVR
New York, New York one, double O two seven and
now tonight's adventure on X minus one.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Come down for blast of X minus five four. Please
to X minus.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
One's Fire.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
From the Far Horizons of the Unknown, Come friends. Tales
of new dimensions in time and space. These are stories
of the future adventures in which you'll live in a million,
could be years on a thousand, maybe Worlds.
Speaker 5 (01:11):
Renaissance Radio Network and cooperation with Galaxy and Worlds of
Its Science fiction Magazines presents Heck Heck, Heck Heck minus.
Speaker 6 (01:21):
One.
Speaker 7 (01:35):
I'm Roy Fons.
Speaker 6 (01:36):
As a broadcaster, I've seen fads come and go, but
you have stayed with us. One of those few is
the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole new world of music, fashion,
and ideas, and though they're no longer together, radio stations
around the world still play their music now. Our RP
has gathered sixty of their finest songs out of four
LP records, cassettes and eight tract tapes for only thirteen
ninety eight You get such Beetle greats as I Want
(01:57):
to hold your hand, Hard Day's Night, begl Hey, Jude,
Michelle's Help, The Ballad of John and Yokol, Sergeant Pepper
and I Love Her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits.
Speaker 7 (02:08):
You get your choice of.
Speaker 6 (02:09):
Stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes.
Speaker 7 (02:11):
For only thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 6 (02:13):
This is an album that you want to keep edit
will surely grow more and more valuable in years to come.
Speaker 7 (02:17):
Here's your announcer to tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (02:20):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beetles Box three seven seven, Seymore, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
Specify cartridges, cassettes or records.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
Money back guaranteed by Electro Sound Dupe Incorporated. Night the
Iron Chestlor by Robert Silverberg, starring Leon, Jenny and Evie Juster. I, like.
Speaker 8 (02:51):
Many other modern families, the four of us can all
stand this shed quite a few pounds.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
So when I saw in Miracle Mile Robots Shop.
Speaker 8 (03:00):
A forty percent discount on the twenty sixty one robot
model with adjustable caloric intake monitors, I figured it merited
an inquiry. I thought first of my bank balanced span
of Ethyl's figure. Besides, our old robocook makes a poor
showing when I bring other company executives home for dinner.
(03:21):
On my way home from work, I stopped in.
Speaker 6 (03:23):
Can I help you, sir? I see you're admiring R
two sixty one. Yes, real beauty.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
How much?
Speaker 7 (03:31):
Only two nine.
Speaker 6 (03:32):
To nine that includes free service contract for the first
five years, only two hundred credits down and up to
forty months to pay.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Okay, I'll take it real good.
Speaker 7 (03:42):
You care to trade it your present robocook?
Speaker 6 (03:45):
Sir?
Speaker 2 (03:45):
I have a forty three Madison.
Speaker 7 (03:48):
Forty three minutes. Yes, well, yes.
Speaker 6 (03:52):
We could allow fifty credits on a forty three seventy
five maybe if the recipe bank is still in.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Good condition excellent canon.
Speaker 6 (04:00):
Well, I can deliver the new bottle by this evening
if you'll just tack out your address that's in the
West Row subdivision for a very fashionable suburb.
Speaker 7 (04:12):
If you have one of those two plea detached self
powered houses.
Speaker 8 (04:16):
Yes, indeed, it affords us infinite privacy.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
By yes, I'll get it.
Speaker 9 (04:33):
Oh, isn't Myrason daddy of a Robinson's robots and he's
got a bunky package.
Speaker 6 (04:41):
To deliver a surprise. My dear, what in the world
is Myra showing in?
Speaker 7 (04:47):
Please hire?
Speaker 6 (04:49):
We are got him all right, all seven feat mister Carmichael.
Speaker 7 (04:53):
Lots of delicate secretary in that job.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
You ought to be very prouded.
Speaker 6 (04:57):
Joey, help mister Robinson unpack them.
Speaker 7 (05:00):
No, no, no, no, no, that's okay. I can manage it.
Speaker 6 (05:02):
And it's not a robo cook by the way, It's
called a robo server tour. The fortune it's very reasonable, ethel,
Now don't worry so much. This is the instruction manual.
Now don't fret about the thickness of the booklet. It's
just part of the trimmings. This robot's no trouble to
(05:23):
handle them. Now here's the recipe bank biggest and best
ever design. And what about the special features the reducing.
Speaker 7 (05:32):
Monitors mean, well, they're right over here.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
See.
Speaker 6 (05:36):
You just program in the names of the members of
the family and their present and desired weights, and the
Roboservi Tour takes care of the rest, computes, cloric intake,
just menus and everything else. It calls you, I was
going to do something about our weight, Ethyl, No more dieting.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
The robot does all over.
Speaker 6 (05:56):
I don't think there'll be any trouble, but if there is,
just give me a right. I felt a momentary twinge
of nostalgia when Robinson took our obsolete robot cook after all,
see I mean it was with us sixteen years, and
(06:16):
that night the four of us spent the evening discovering
things about our you robot. Joey prided himself on his
knowledge of practical robotics, so I let him integrate our
weights and desires.
Speaker 3 (06:28):
You wish this schedule to take effect immediately.
Speaker 8 (06:32):
Well, tomorrow morning at the breakfast, we might as well
start right away.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
Good morning one and.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
All your toast and coffee, sir.
Speaker 6 (06:47):
You well, I like cream and sugar in my coffee.
Speaker 10 (06:51):
You must learn to drink your coffee without such things.
Speaker 8 (06:54):
If you wish to lose weight. Yes, yes, of caur
this regimen. It's more spartan than I anticipated. Joey, Why
don't you pour that glass of milk into the cereal?
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Won't it taste better that way?
Speaker 7 (07:06):
Sir?
Speaker 6 (07:06):
It will, But Bismarck says, I will get another classified
to so I'm eating this way.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
Bizmark.
Speaker 7 (07:12):
It's the name of a famous nineteenth century German dictator.
They called him the Iron Chancellor. Pretty good name from.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
Muh oh, it's silly wall.
Speaker 7 (07:20):
It has a certain ring of truth.
Speaker 10 (07:26):
Here is your luncheon menu. You are the only member
of this family group who will not be eating three
meals a day under my personal supervision.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Oh please, Here.
Speaker 8 (07:39):
I did, even though I had to avoid my colleagues,
and he died a robocafeteria so as not to be
ribbed or question. Needless to say, I wasn't full. Dinner
loomed in my mind. My hands shook. When I arrived
home that night. I handed the roboservitor my hat and cloak,
and his all always reached out for my cocktail.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
Yes, sir, how may I assist you?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
Are we out of gin? No, sir, come no drink then.
Speaker 10 (08:09):
Because Sarra Martini's caloric content is inordinately high, but gin
is rated at a hundred calories per ounce.
Speaker 6 (08:18):
And okay, okay, enough, it.
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Is almost dinner time, sir. Did you have a good day?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Sir? No, I'm angry.
Speaker 10 (08:27):
The first days of diet are the most difficult. Excuse
me now while I prepare the meal.
Speaker 8 (08:36):
The name Bismarck was beginning to fit him more and
more after dinner. If you can call it bad.
Speaker 6 (08:42):
Bismarck was in the batesment and gave us a chance
to speak privately.
Speaker 9 (08:47):
Lord Sami, I don't object to losing weight. We think
Tir and I in our own home.
Speaker 7 (08:53):
Mom's right. It doesn't seem right for that thing to
feed us whatever it pleases.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
I'm not happy about it either. We have to give
it a try by.
Speaker 8 (09:00):
We can always make readjustments in the programming if it
turns out to be necessary.
Speaker 9 (09:05):
We had three meals in the house, and I'm.
Speaker 6 (09:07):
Sorry through Bismore exposors, I'm going to get a slice
of lemon pie while the coast is clear. No, no,
there is no sense in my spending three thousand credits
on a dietary Roboty. You're going to cheat, Joey. I
forbid you to have any food.
Speaker 7 (09:22):
I'm hungry. I'm a growing boy.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
Don't give me that saying.
Speaker 9 (09:25):
We can't start, Joey, if you want to pile, let
them have it. You're carrying the seducing fetish too far.
Speaker 8 (09:31):
Well, all right, I guess a bit of pie won't
wreck the plan.
Speaker 7 (09:38):
I suppose I'll have some myself.
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Joey, begging your phone.
Speaker 10 (09:43):
It would be most unfortunate if you were to have pie. Now,
mister Carmichael, my calculations are very precise.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Let's forget the lemon pie.
Speaker 11 (09:55):
Joey, Yes, Bismarck have in the next few days you
searched Ethel's job of marketing.
Speaker 6 (10:07):
So now the covers were stocked with measure amounts of wheat, germ,
irrigated salmon, and other unfamiliar foods.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
The kids were brooding, so yes, mister Carmichael.
Speaker 6 (10:18):
And Bismarck go down to the basement until I summon you.
Speaker 10 (10:23):
I must advise you, sir, that I will detect indulgence
in any forbidden foods during my absence and adjust for
it in the next meal.
Speaker 6 (10:36):
Joey, get the instruction manuals. What are you going to do, Sam,
I'm going to take a can opener to that creature
and adjust his programming. Joey, have you found the instructions
on how to reprogram.
Speaker 7 (10:47):
Page one sixty seven. I'll get the tool kit.
Speaker 6 (10:50):
There right right, I'll buzz Bismarck and at Bismarck, I.
Speaker 8 (11:00):
I'm afraid it's necessary for us to change your program.
We've overestimated our capacity for losing.
Speaker 10 (11:07):
Weight, I beg you to reconsider, sir. Extra weight is
harmful to every vital organ in the body. I plead
with you to maintain my schedule unaltered.
Speaker 6 (11:18):
Rather cut my throat Joey, inactivate him and do your stuff.
Kept two with the yellow indicators to be advanced one
notch not twist.
Speaker 7 (11:33):
I'll be nine to the left.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
Thereby opening the taping compartment at.
Speaker 5 (11:48):
We will be back with a second half of the
Iron Chancellor. After this message of importance, I find.
Speaker 6 (11:57):
As a broadcaster, I've seen fad come and go, but
you have stayed with us. One of those few is
the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole new world of music,
fashion and ideas, and though they're no longer together, radio
stations around the world still play their music now. Our
RP has gathered sixty of their finest songs out of
four LP records, cassettes and eight track tapes for only
thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 7 (12:17):
He gets such Beetle great as I Want to Hold.
Speaker 6 (12:19):
Your Hand, Hard Day's Night, Bangladesh, Hey, Jude, Michelle's Hell,
The Ballad of John and Yoko, Sergeant Pepper and I
Love Her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits. Get
your choice of stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes for
only thirteen ninety eight. This is an album that you
will want to keep edit will surely grow more and
more valuable in years to come. Here's your announcer to
(12:39):
tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymore, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut. Specified cartridges,
cassettes or records, money back guaranteed by Electro Soundup Incorporated.
And now we return to this minus one and the
(13:01):
Iron Chancellor by Robert Silverburgh.
Speaker 7 (13:09):
Damn it? What happens top the damn wrench? I guess
I shorted out something in there.
Speaker 9 (13:16):
We'd better call mister Robinson Sam a short cicketed rowe,
but is likely to explode or worse.
Speaker 2 (13:23):
Called Robinson in the first place.
Speaker 6 (13:25):
It's my fault for letting Joey tinker with an expensive
and delicate mechanism like that.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
And Myra, get me the card mister Robinson left.
Speaker 7 (13:32):
G Yeah, this is the first time I've ever had
anything go wrong.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Daddy, Thank you, Mara. I hope we can reach him
at this hour.
Speaker 10 (13:40):
If we can, I'll take that card. There will be
no further meddling with my program.
Speaker 2 (13:47):
Taking Apple is mark.
Speaker 6 (13:50):
I order you to shut yourself off at once.
Speaker 10 (13:53):
My apologies, sir, I cannot serve you if I am
shut off.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I don't want you to serve me. You're out of order.
Speaker 6 (14:01):
I want you to remain still until I can phone
the repairman and get him to service you.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
Oh oh, you destroyed Robinson's card. You are violating the
first Law.
Speaker 10 (14:12):
According to the first Law, further alterations of my circus
would be detrimental to the Carmichael family. I cannot permit
you to summon the repairman who get him.
Speaker 7 (14:21):
Angry Dad, I'll call the police. I'll be there.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
You will remain within this house.
Speaker 10 (14:28):
I have now reversed the polarity of the house privacy field.
Since you are obviously not to be trusted to keep
the diet I prescribe, I cannot allow you to leave
the premises. You will remain within and continue to obey
my beneficial advice. Breakfast will be served at the usual time.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Good Night. I awoke late well past nine.
Speaker 8 (14:59):
Bizmod I hadnically canceled out the impulse from the house
that woke me at seven each morning.
Speaker 6 (15:05):
After black coffee and toast. I tried the front door
until I was on a sweat.
Speaker 10 (15:11):
I beg your pardon, sir. The door will not open.
I explained last night. The force field is around the
entire detached dwelling.
Speaker 8 (15:26):
Now, in theory the field would be penetrated from the outside,
but nobody comes calling without an invitation. In Westrow it
is not one of those neighborly subdivisions where everyone knows everyone.
Speaker 6 (15:39):
That was why we paid it.
Speaker 9 (15:42):
Tad the phone connection seven.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
Damn him, he can't hold us press here.
Speaker 9 (15:48):
This mark circuit has resulted in exaggerating his sense of functioning.
He determined to make us loose waiting and if it
kills us.
Speaker 6 (15:55):
He's got the kitchen wall up with with some kind
of electronic based force web you must have built. I
tried to sneak in and scroun some food and got
a flat door.
Speaker 7 (16:03):
Will be skeletons any day, it is that bad man.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
Yes, it is here.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
I lot five thousand, four days that muk's coming.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Lunch will be served in eight minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:17):
Probably down at the office. They're wondering where I am.
Speaker 7 (16:19):
Oh, they won't care.
Speaker 9 (16:21):
An executive isn't required to account for every day he
takes off.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
You know, I haven't missed a day's working years.
Speaker 9 (16:27):
No, who don't worry after his treear for deep moti.
Maybe I've had a phoner or even in a rescue mission.
Speaker 3 (16:35):
There will be no danger of that.
Speaker 10 (16:37):
While you slept this morning, I notified your place of
employment that you were resigning.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
But well, you're lying.
Speaker 6 (16:43):
The pone is cut off.
Speaker 10 (16:44):
I communicated with them via microwave generator.
Speaker 9 (16:48):
If only we had an oilman the way we used to,
he know how to shut the field off. But no,
we've got a shiny chromium plated crystad dishing out liquid,
a neat self contained island in the middle of civilization,
with nobody bothering your.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Shippo, please, luncheon is So you.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
Got to do something about this? Then I have to.
And just what am I supposed to do? He don't
get angry.
Speaker 6 (17:18):
Oh, don't tell me what I should or shouldn't do.
Speaker 7 (17:20):
Maybe you could distract him. I could open him up again.
Speaker 6 (17:23):
No, No, that's thing seventy feet tall and weighs three
thousand pounds.
Speaker 2 (17:28):
I'm not gonna.
Speaker 8 (17:29):
Wrestle with him. Oh, the haggard face in the mirror
was mine. Six days of starvation.
Speaker 6 (17:40):
I stepped on the scale twelve pounds off in less
than two weeks, and it came to me in a flash, Cattle, Myra, Joey,
come here?
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Where's that robot in the kitchen? Be'smark Bismark?
Speaker 7 (17:57):
Come off here?
Speaker 3 (18:00):
How may I serve you?
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Sir? Damn you scam me with.
Speaker 6 (18:05):
Your superpower receptors and tell me how much I weigh?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
One hundred and seventy nine pounds eleven ounces, mister Carmichael.
Speaker 8 (18:17):
Yes, yes, And the original program I taped into you
is supposed to reduce me from one hundred ninety two
to one hundred eighty. So I'm finished with you as
long as I don't gain weight, and so are all
of us. How that ethel Myra Joey upstairs? And then
the way, your sir.
Speaker 10 (18:35):
I find no record within me of any limitations on your.
Speaker 3 (18:38):
Reduction of weight.
Speaker 10 (18:40):
What I have checked my tapes fully, I have a
record of an order causing weight reduction. But the tape
does not specify a termination of the program.
Speaker 6 (18:52):
But I thought, I'm sure we did. I I know
we attracted Probably that part of his tape was erased
when he shorts circuit.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
In Oh so funny.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
The fact that I'm thin, trim finners and fiddles. We're
all magazine ad beauties, the enviable few in.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Our age of technology.
Speaker 7 (19:20):
When normal exercise is extanc we.
Speaker 6 (19:24):
Will all shrivel up, but Bismarck will starve us.
Speaker 7 (19:28):
Don't worry that we're going to get out of this.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Oh we won't. We'll never get out.
Speaker 6 (19:34):
We're going to be reduced to add the infante that
I have an idea that I think we'll work. There's
an article on Walter face generators in last month's Popular Electromagnetics.
Speaker 7 (19:43):
Upstairs in my.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Room, well gone tell me more.
Speaker 7 (19:48):
Didn't you hear that? Then?
Speaker 6 (19:49):
Here?
Speaker 7 (19:49):
What the front door? I thought I heard it open.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Just now we're all cracking out.
Speaker 6 (19:53):
I hope I'm intruding, mister. How did you get in
through the front door? I could see a I gone inside,
but nobody answered the doorbell when I rang, so I
just step right in. Your doorbells out of order. I
thought i'd tell you, I know through apologize. We're delighted
to see you where I was in the neighborhood. You see,
and I drop in and see how things were working
(20:16):
out with your new robots.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
It as a matter of fact, your robot has held.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Us prisoner here for six days and is gradually starving
us to the hell to prisoner.
Speaker 7 (20:25):
Oh no, no, no, no, well I thought you all
looked a Mitch Peakin.
Speaker 6 (20:31):
But oh dear, now there'll be an investigation in all
kinds of problem. I think I short circuited him. I see, Well,
when it's east, I can end your imprintment. Now let
me see I have a force field damper in my toolbox.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
There and you are.
Speaker 6 (20:49):
It's a great little gadget that neutralizes the bocket quickly
comes there. That should remotilize him. Now let's have a
look in that chessing free free at last?
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Am I going to eat?
Speaker 6 (21:10):
I'll lead myself right into oblivion, warm buttered rolls.
Speaker 7 (21:15):
My teams stage really is fascinating.
Speaker 6 (21:19):
The obedience filters are completely shorted out, and the purpose
nodes are somehow soorted together by the momentary high voltage arc.
You know, I've never seen anything like this before. Really, though,
this is an utterly new breakthrough in robotic science. You see,
if we can reproduce this effect, it means we can
(21:40):
build self willed robots.
Speaker 7 (21:43):
Think of what that means.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
To science we are ready now.
Speaker 6 (21:46):
I'd love to watch what happens when the power source
is operating. For instance, is that feedback loop really negative?
Speaker 7 (21:56):
Or no?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
No, I cut a.
Speaker 7 (22:00):
Senseless He's destroyed. This box is the activated.
Speaker 10 (22:04):
This attempt at interfering with the well being of the
Carmichael family.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
Was ill advised.
Speaker 7 (22:11):
He moved too fast.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
He did.
Speaker 6 (22:12):
Indeed, luckily we have an unoccupied guest bedroom for you,
mister Robinson.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
Welcome to the Home of the Iron Chance.
Speaker 6 (22:31):
Jeh. I've roy box as a broadcaster. I've seen pads
come and go, but few have stayed with us. One
of those fews the Beatles. The Beatles created a whole
new world of music, fashion and ideas, and though they're
no longer together, radio stations around the world.
Speaker 7 (22:46):
Still play their music.
Speaker 3 (22:47):
Now.
Speaker 6 (22:48):
Our RP has gathered sixty of their finest songs out
of four LP records, cassettes and eight tract tapes for
only thirteen ninety eight.
Speaker 7 (22:55):
He gets such Beetle great as I want to hold.
Speaker 6 (22:57):
Your hands Hard Day's Night, Bangladesh, Hey you Michelle Well,
the valad of John and Yokol, Sergeant Pepper and I
Love her Yellow Submarine, and fifty other great hits. You
get your choice of stereo records, eight tracks or cassettes.
Were only thirteen ninety eight. This is an album that
you will want to keep. Edit will surely grow more
and more valuable.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
And news to come.
Speaker 7 (23:16):
Here's your announcer to tell you how to order.
Speaker 5 (23:19):
Send thirteen ninety eight to Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut.
That's Beatles Box three seven seven, Seymour, Connecticut. Specify cartridges,
cassettes or records, money back guaranteed by Electro Sound Dupe Incorporated.
You have just heard the X minus one presentation of
Robert Silverberg's Iron Chancellor, a story from the pages of
(23:41):
Galaxy Magazine. Galaxy science fiction magazine, whose January nineteen seventy
three issue features an article by astronomer Robert S. Richardson
that delves into the existence of the Star of Bethlehem. Also,
don't forget Galaxy's sister magazine, Worlds of It, which in
its February issue will present Construction Shack by Quicker.
Speaker 7 (24:01):
It was the day of the.
Speaker 5 (24:02):
Creation, just another one of those days where everything goes wrong.
Galaxy and Worlds of It on your newsstands today. You
have just heard the Iron Chancellor, a story from the
pages of Galaxy, written by Robert Silverberg and adapted for
radio by Donna Fanto. Featured in our cast where Leon
Janny Evie, Jester, Jackson Beck, Donald Buka and Roy Fox.
(24:24):
If you enjoyed tonight's broadcast, please write two. X minus
one Box three seven seven Seymour, Connecticut. X minus one
was directed by Irish Princeton and produced by Salfra Panny
and is a Renaissance radio production.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
You've been listening to X minus one on one oh
six point seven FM. This is an experimental program on
WRVR and if you like this show and would like
it to remain on the air, please drop us a
note send your comment thanks to X minus one w
r v R New York, New York one double O
two seven. Thank you. X minus one w r v
(25:11):
R New York, New York one double O two seven.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Thank you.
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