October 15, 2025 • 27 mins
A science fiction series that explores futuristic concepts and speculative scenarios, each episode delving into the possibilities of technology and space exploration.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Mm hmm, Calm down for blast off x minus five
four three two x minus one fire. From the far
(00:38):
horizons of the unknown come transcribed tales of new dimensions
in time and space. These are stories of the future
adventures in which you'll live in a million, could be years,
on a thousand, maybe worlds. The National Broadcasting Company, in
cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of Astounding Science Fiction,
presents he.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Minus one one.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Tonight's story a logic named Joe by Murray Leinster.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
It was on the third day of August that Joe
come off the assembly line, and on the fourth Loreen
came into town, and that afternoon I save civilization.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
Loraine is a blonde.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
I was crazy about once, and Joe is a new
nineteen seventy four model logic that I've got stored away
down in the cellar.
Speaker 5 (01:44):
And how do I save civilizations?
Speaker 3 (01:45):
You're listening now to a voice from the future, the
voice of Frank Caldwell, head serviceman for the Logics Corporation,
makers of the machine that does everything.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
For you, well nearly everything, anyway, the electronic logic.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
In the year we speak nineteen seventy four, no modern
home was completely of one, and the logic sets were
working so well that life was soft, indeed for repairman
Frank Caldwell, that is until that fatal day of August
the third, when suddenly the logics began doing everything for
their users and doing it myself too well.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
On the third of August, there wasn't much doing, and
I'm hanging around the boss's office smoking up his cigars.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
Frank, there's a customer outside. Go take care of him,
will you me?
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I'm a maintenance man.
Speaker 6 (02:28):
Mister Korlanovitch wants to have logics explained to him.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Explain who has he been on? Mys?
Speaker 6 (02:33):
I just moved up from the backwoods someplace.
Speaker 5 (02:35):
Oh why don't you explain him?
Speaker 7 (02:36):
Well, I don't feel too well.
Speaker 5 (02:37):
You were okay half an hour ago?
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Are you the boss?
Speaker 7 (02:39):
Here?
Speaker 6 (02:40):
Am I going out there? We are you?
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Okay? Okay? Oh, mister Karlanovitch, good morning. My name is Caldwell.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Can I help you?
Speaker 8 (02:48):
Thank you, mister Caldwell. This is my little boy, Freddie,
Hi shirt Freddy? Many times have I got to tell
you not to kick people in the sheens?
Speaker 5 (02:58):
Excuse it please, mister Carlin Well, Oh sure, sure, just
a kid.
Speaker 9 (03:02):
I got a knife phone could cut you into little pieces.
Speaker 8 (03:07):
We'd like to buy a logic, mister Cagwell, the gentleman
we spoke to first said he had to leave.
Speaker 7 (03:12):
In a hurry.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
I'll fix him.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Well, I understand that you're not acquainted with logic's mister Kolanovitch.
Speaker 7 (03:17):
That's right. We just moved to the city.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Huh.
Speaker 7 (03:20):
My wife, she saw everybody else at a logic.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
And you know how women, No, you bet well, you
can't get along without a logic in this day and age,
mister Kolanovitch, Look, I.
Speaker 9 (03:30):
Got a snake you want to see.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
And now about the logic here, I'll just plug in
this one right here. Now you see, the logic looks
kind of like an old fashioned television set, only it's
got keys instead of dials. Now, a lot of the
keys a standard like the television stations, and use the
stock market quotes and so on. Of course, if you
want to talk to somebody, you just punched the number
of his logic.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
It's it's like making an old fashioned phone call.
Speaker 7 (03:55):
But there can't be keys for everything.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
No, no, no, no no.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
Let's say that you want to ask question like what
to take for a sore throat or who won the
American League Pennant in nineteen hundred and eleven. You turn
on the logic, then you just punched the question key
and ask like this, who was the first President of
the United States?
Speaker 10 (04:18):
George Washington?
Speaker 7 (04:20):
There you see, but I already knew that.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
Well, of course that was just a sample.
Speaker 7 (04:26):
I got a little store. Will it keep books for me?
Speaker 4 (04:28):
It will keep your books, record your contracts, serve as
a filing system, and check up on what happened to
your lawyer's last client anything.
Speaker 7 (04:35):
Hey, they're really something, these things.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Ten thousand services and information sources in one read our advertising.
Speaker 7 (04:42):
What I want to know, mister Caldwell, how do these
logics work?
Speaker 5 (04:45):
Of course?
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Now you saw that big building across the street. Sure,
well that's one of the relay tanks.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
You see.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
There are a dozen of them all around the country,
and they're all hooked up together. And there's a data
plate in one of those tanks for every fact in creation.
Anything that you want to see hear, You just punch
for it and the logic gives you the answer.
Speaker 9 (05:03):
Hey, listen, could I ask this thing how to make
dart poison?
Speaker 5 (05:06):
How to make what dart poison?
Speaker 8 (05:09):
Like?
Speaker 9 (05:09):
In Africa. How could shoot the dogs through my bean shooter?
Speaker 7 (05:12):
Maybe I think maybe we better not get one of
these things.
Speaker 5 (05:15):
Oh no, no, no, no, it's perfectly all right, mister Karlanovich.
The logic won't tell you that.
Speaker 9 (05:18):
I bet it will. I'm gonna try it. Hey, how
do you make dart poison.
Speaker 10 (05:28):
A big policy for bitches? This service?
Speaker 5 (05:31):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (05:32):
What did do that for?
Speaker 4 (05:33):
What kind of some little breath? Because some people might
ask things that aren't good for them.
Speaker 9 (05:37):
Listen, I don't like this here one. I want that
one over there.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Kid, They're all alike.
Speaker 9 (05:42):
I want that one. If I can't have that one,
I'm gonna hold my breath till I'm dead.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
I got a lot of time.
Speaker 7 (05:47):
It's no use, mister carr Wall, you might as well
give him the one he wants.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Look, kid, there's so much alike that even I can't
tell them apart I can, and I want Joe.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Joe. Who's Joe?
Speaker 8 (05:58):
I guess he means the logic, mister carrwh he has
to think up a name to call everything.
Speaker 7 (06:03):
You should hear some of the names he calls me.
Speaker 9 (06:05):
Not till I'm twenty one, I promised, mother.
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Okay, so we call him Joe. But them things are
all alike to one ten thousands of an inch.
Speaker 9 (06:12):
I don't care. I bet he'll teach me how to
make dart poison.
Speaker 4 (06:16):
Okay, then come on, Joe. So he keeps yelling I
want that one. I want that one. I'm gonna call
him Joe.
Speaker 10 (06:35):
Mike.
Speaker 4 (06:35):
I tell you I could have wrung his neck. How
many cards I'll draw it two? What a holy terror
he had his father scared to death.
Speaker 5 (06:42):
It's too bad that kid ain't mine. And I'd show
him quick enough who was boss in the family. Oh,
holy smoke, I'm sorry, fellas.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
I gotta hold up the hand him and I just remembered,
I gotta call my wife letter weight.
Speaker 5 (06:53):
You ever met my wife? Hey, matter with this thing?
You ain't get in my house.
Speaker 10 (07:02):
Bouncing new and improved Logic Service. Your logic is now
equipped to give not only consultative, but directive advice. If
you want to do something and don't know how to
do it, ask your logic.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
Hey, did you guys hear that?
Speaker 6 (07:19):
Well?
Speaker 5 (07:19):
They should have told us about it. It was just
somebody trying to pull a gag.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
It didn't sound like a gag to me.
Speaker 5 (07:24):
Yeah, maybe the boss decided to add a new logic service.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Look, the minute the system starts giving advice, some joker
like you was going to be asking questions like.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
How do I get rid of my wife? Oh no,
the boss knows better than It's not anything like that. Yeah,
but you heard what the logic just said. Oh listen,
the censor circuits will block the question. You don't believe me,
go ahead and try it. No anything for a gag.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Okay, logic, I got a question for you, How do
I get rid of my wife?
Speaker 10 (07:52):
Service? Question? Is your wife blonde or brunette?
Speaker 5 (07:57):
Did they hear that she's a blonde?
Speaker 10 (08:05):
Exy Krylo Bintine is a constituent of green shoe polish.
Take home a frozen meal containing pea soup. Color the
soup with green shoe polish. This poison is fatal to
blonde females only. This fact is a product of logic service.
You cannot be convicted of murder. It is improbable that
(08:29):
you will be suspected.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
This is preserved and it's bound to be right. These
things can't make a mistake. Well, Mike, don't just stand.
Let's check the census circuits quick.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
We can't get to them.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
They're all sealed up. It's supposed to be impossible for
them to go.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Out of order.
Speaker 5 (08:42):
Well, they're out of order now. And I got a
feeling that some awful things are gonna happen.
Speaker 7 (09:00):
Us.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
We've got to do something. The logics have gone nuts.
Speaker 6 (09:02):
I relaxed the thing, gave a goofy answer once. Maybe
it was a joke, but it was an accident. No,
forget it, it won't happen again.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
What makes you so sure people are going to be
trying it? Look, look, supposing I wanted to get rid
of you, for.
Speaker 6 (09:14):
Instance, you don't how would you collect your pants? I know,
but just supposing not that, we'll try it.
Speaker 10 (09:21):
If you want to do something and don't know how,
ask your logic.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
How do I bump off my boss? Male, fat, bald headed,
and forty five?
Speaker 10 (09:35):
Make some chocolate ice cream containing powdered charcoal. In place
of half the chocolate, use hot sobrand charcoal. Hot so So
contains an ingredient fatal only to fat bald headed males.
This fact is a product of logic service.
Speaker 6 (09:53):
And I look, Frank, I admit these things have gone
a little wacky, but there's nothing to worry about nothing
to worry about.
Speaker 5 (09:58):
If this keeps up, what are you that we'll have
to shut down the company?
Speaker 6 (10:01):
You're kidding. We can't shut down the company, and you
know it. Logics have taken the place of everything but
night baseball. We shut them down, we go back to
a civilization that we've forgotten.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
How to run.
Speaker 5 (10:10):
It's the boss. There is no telling what they'll do.
Speaker 6 (10:12):
Listen, now you've asked these questions for a gag. Nobody's
going to ask them seriously. What you need is a
little faith in human nature. Excuse me, it's probably my wife.
Speaker 10 (10:23):
How do you see you?
Speaker 2 (10:24):
All right?
Speaker 6 (10:24):
Just fine, sweetheart? What you been doing?
Speaker 10 (10:26):
I just call?
Speaker 11 (10:28):
I've got your sasner dessert?
Speaker 5 (10:32):
What kind holy chocolate ice cream?
Speaker 9 (10:36):
Sirs? When you just come?
Speaker 10 (10:40):
What's wrong?
Speaker 9 (10:42):
Why don't you any.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
Chalked with ice cream?
Speaker 7 (10:47):
This can't be happening?
Speaker 6 (10:48):
Why this this is awful? These logics are dangerous humans. Now,
corn well, you're the head of the maintenance crew. I'll
give you twenty four hours to fix. These logics are
your fire. Now look what are you standing there for?
Getting the service car? Get moving where anywhere? Find out
what the logics are up to and see that you
find out before the logics do.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
But un bounder, give me a double lash night.
Speaker 7 (11:19):
I have a little drink. What'd you matter if you
had a bad day? Excuse me, but listen, file, you
gotta listen. I got troubles.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
But will you get this bar fly off of me? Oh,
don't say that I got troubles.
Speaker 7 (11:31):
How am I going to keep my wife from finding
out I had a couple of little drinks? How am
I gonna do it?
Speaker 5 (11:37):
Mister?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
It's a hot day, and I've been driving a car
around in and see, and I've been trying to keep
a bank president from having apoplexy on a kind of
his logic told him how to rob his own bank.
I've been trying to stop six year olds from asking
what comes after the bees and the flowers, and their fathers.
Speaker 5 (11:50):
From asking how to get a million dollars by tomorrow.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I've been tripping over a dead body so artistically croaked
that nobody's ever gonna.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
Find out who's done it. And all you got on
your mind is how how am I gonna keep my
wife from fighting? I've been drinking R up. Will you
go ask the logic?
Speaker 10 (12:02):
My pile?
Speaker 7 (12:03):
My boy, where's the logic, where's.
Speaker 5 (12:05):
That log right behind you? Here, here's a nickel.
Speaker 7 (12:07):
I gotta hair a come on, logic, old pile, old pile.
Be nice out as a guy keeper his wife from
finding out he's had a couple of little drinks.
Speaker 5 (12:20):
Answer me that.
Speaker 10 (12:25):
By a bottle of Frannine hair shampoo. It is harmless,
but contains an ingredient which instantly neutralizes alcohol one teaspoonful
for each gigger you have consumed.
Speaker 6 (12:38):
Oh boy, oh boy, gotta buy a bottle of gotta
buy a bottle of.
Speaker 10 (12:44):
What was that again?
Speaker 7 (12:45):
I pusn't.
Speaker 8 (12:45):
It's right, you'll never remember it. As far as the
drug store, I think there's a bottle in the back room.
Somebody left it.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Oh my pid, Oh my boy, No more troubles.
Speaker 9 (12:54):
You're just show me a way.
Speaker 7 (12:58):
I got a picture of him back there, drinking shampoo.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Yeah, give me another double.
Speaker 7 (13:04):
I don't know what's worse to be as low as
you are, as high as him.
Speaker 9 (13:07):
Where is he? I know he's here? Where is that
far you want?
Speaker 7 (13:10):
Lady?
Speaker 9 (13:11):
My husband? I know he's here. Where is he.
Speaker 10 (13:15):
That?
Speaker 9 (13:15):
No good louse house?
Speaker 10 (13:17):
Show him?
Speaker 9 (13:18):
I think he's coming home staggering again? Doessy well?
Speaker 7 (13:21):
I'll teach him, poor guy.
Speaker 4 (13:23):
Why, my dear, what a surprise to see you here, Archibald.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
You're sober, of course, my love. I am sober as
a judge.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
And what are you doing in a saloon?
Speaker 5 (13:34):
Your suspicion wounds me deeply, my love.
Speaker 12 (13:37):
Let me tell you, my dear, that I've been conducting
a research project that is going to make us a fortune.
Speaker 7 (13:42):
I am going to pattern.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Sober a drink that makes happy home.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
Look at this bladder, cold well blank. The greatest crime
even history, and weekend even make an arrest. They're all
perfect crimes.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Thanks to the logic, the sogeant, we're doing our best
to find Well, that's not good enough.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
You can't find out what's back.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Of They shut down the company, rust the police department
with nobody is back of it. The logics run themselves.
They pick their own circuits automatically.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
You mean they're doing all this by themselves.
Speaker 4 (14:22):
Sure, we always knew they could do a lot more
things than we knew about. I think they're just trying
to be helpful, that's all.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That's all. Well, you better make them cut out the tricks,
including this new business they're up to.
Speaker 5 (14:34):
Now, what new business?
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Just started an hour ago. Every time you turn on
the logic.
Speaker 6 (14:41):
It asks your name, and then it speels out the
whole history of your life.
Speaker 5 (14:46):
I haven't heard about that. What's to do that for?
Speaker 7 (14:48):
You?
Speaker 4 (14:48):
Tell me?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
God? Go ahead, try it?
Speaker 5 (14:51):
Okay?
Speaker 10 (14:53):
What is your name?
Speaker 5 (14:55):
Do you like that? I'm Frank Caldwell.
Speaker 10 (14:58):
Frank Caldwell. Are you ever called ducky?
Speaker 6 (15:02):
Ducky?
Speaker 5 (15:04):
Lay you off with your fellow? What if I was?
Speaker 10 (15:06):
It's been years, Ducky, there is a call for you.
Speaker 5 (15:13):
Hello, Ducky, Holy cats, Loreen.
Speaker 10 (15:18):
Ducky dolling?
Speaker 4 (15:19):
How molly, hey, let me get a little gosh, Loreen?
Speaker 5 (15:24):
Where are you?
Speaker 10 (15:25):
I'm in a hotel. I just got into town. Oh, Ducky.
Wasn't it smart of the logic to find you?
Speaker 5 (15:32):
The logic to find me?
Speaker 10 (15:34):
I asked it?
Speaker 9 (15:35):
How to find Duky?
Speaker 10 (15:37):
You must have an unlisted number. Dollar you're not in
the directory?
Speaker 4 (15:40):
Well, uh gee uh? Have you been Loreen since since
I saw you?
Speaker 5 (15:45):
Last? I heard you got married?
Speaker 11 (15:47):
You won't believe me, donkey, I know, but I've had
four husbands, and I've never loved anybody as much as
I love you.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
You've divorced four husbands, three the last one died unexpected?
Speaker 5 (16:02):
Who unexpected?
Speaker 1 (16:03):
He did?
Speaker 10 (16:05):
But the jury acquitted me.
Speaker 9 (16:06):
Donkey, they knew it was just a little old accident.
Speaker 10 (16:09):
So now I'm free again, and we got lots of
things to talk over. You come right out over here.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Oh well, Lorraine, I'm I'm working, you see, and I'll
call you back, all right.
Speaker 10 (16:23):
He is a kid. M that'll have to hold you till.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
You get here. Oh my back.
Speaker 4 (16:32):
What am I gonna do do?
Speaker 2 (16:35):
Like you were telling me a while ago. Huh, calm yourself, ducky.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Call on the logic for you, Frank, your wife? Oh thanks, Mike,
Hi gurd Frank.
Speaker 11 (16:56):
I've been trying to get you for an.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
I've been not making calls, honey, trying to find out
what ails these logics.
Speaker 9 (17:01):
Well, you better find out in a hurry.
Speaker 10 (17:03):
There's going to be trouble.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
No, no, look good not just take it easy. Huh.
Speaker 11 (17:05):
Well, you can't let this happen to me. They're asking
everybody's name, and when you tell your name, it reels.
Speaker 9 (17:11):
Off your whole history.
Speaker 4 (17:12):
Well, honey, I don't think they're doing that anymore. I
think that was just just temporary.
Speaker 10 (17:15):
Well, in the.
Speaker 11 (17:15):
Meantime, it's told everybody in the neighborhood all about me.
I punched missus Hudson's name. She's been married three times
and she's had mister Hudson arrested twice but non support
and once for beating her up. It'll tell anybody anything.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
Yeah, but look good.
Speaker 11 (17:27):
I'll tell you you stop these things, and I'm gonna
leave you.
Speaker 5 (17:31):
Oh honey, you don't mean that I do.
Speaker 11 (17:33):
If you can't figure out how to keep off private
lives out of every logic in the town that I'm
through and that settles it.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
I can't even budge any of these relay plates me.
Isn't there some way we can disconnect them?
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Nope, there is not.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
They weren't built to be disconnected. The censors circuits were
supposed to take care of cutting them off. No, that's
for Frank.
Speaker 10 (18:01):
Hello, Dakey Darling.
Speaker 5 (18:03):
Oh Loreen, not again, ducky Darling.
Speaker 10 (18:06):
I'm so lone.
Speaker 9 (18:07):
Since why haven't you come over?
Speaker 5 (18:09):
Why I've been busy?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
Oh, poor ducky.
Speaker 9 (18:14):
No, let's get.
Speaker 5 (18:16):
Married, gosh, Loreen. I well, what I mean is.
Speaker 9 (18:20):
Right away, you're not busy tonight, are you?
Speaker 5 (18:23):
Look? Loreen? I got married?
Speaker 9 (18:26):
Oh, poor boy.
Speaker 10 (18:27):
My poor ducky.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
Well we'll just get you out of that No, no, no, no, no, look, Loreene, it's.
Speaker 10 (18:32):
All arranged, darling.
Speaker 9 (18:33):
I'll just call up your wife and have a little talk.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
No, no, please, Loreen. I mean, it's nice of you
to think of me and all, but you.
Speaker 10 (18:39):
Just give me your address and your logic number.
Speaker 5 (18:41):
I haven't got one.
Speaker 9 (18:42):
Never mind, it's the logic we'll find out for me.
Speaker 5 (18:46):
Loreen, Loreen, you get away from that thing and give
me a.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Yes Mike in a minute. First, I've got to call
my wife. We gotta get out of town.
Speaker 5 (18:54):
Oh lord, I made a mistake.
Speaker 6 (18:56):
Frank. You're supposed to be helping Mike.
Speaker 5 (18:58):
Yeah, I am, boss, I am, But I gotta make
this call.
Speaker 7 (19:00):
What do I care about your call?
Speaker 6 (19:01):
President's getting ready to close down the company and declared
martiall law.
Speaker 5 (19:04):
Now, for the love of Heaven.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Deuced ask for us.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
I will, I will.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I've just got to make this one call before the
logics get on my trail.
Speaker 10 (19:12):
To assist in solving a special problem of logic service.
Kindly give the following information, if possible. Where does Frank
callwell live?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
They got me. I'm through, look, Gert, will you please
not ask any more questions? I told you I was leaving, honey,
leave me later right now. W you pack up yourself
and the kids. We got to get out of here.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
What is all this?
Speaker 9 (19:43):
Are the cops after you or something?
Speaker 10 (19:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (19:45):
Yeah, that's it. That's it, the cops.
Speaker 4 (19:47):
Now get moving, honey, William and when you get away
from that logic.
Speaker 9 (19:49):
But don't you think we ought to hear the police call?
Speaker 10 (19:55):
Twenty seven and God thirty one detailed around up all
employees of the logic's company. Use caution. They are suspected
of sedition.
Speaker 5 (20:04):
Well, le smoke. The cops are after me.
Speaker 10 (20:08):
Car seventeen precede a vicinity of one one nine East
seventh Street. Child terrorizing neighborhood. Use extreme caution. Child is
armed with bean shooter using poison dots.
Speaker 5 (20:21):
Freddy Who's Freddy? Something I met once in a horrible nightmare.
He wanted a logic that would tell him how to
make dot poison. They're all alike, I kept telling him,
they're all alike?
Speaker 9 (20:29):
Are you talking about?
Speaker 10 (20:31):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I don't know, gird. All I know is it was
a nice world up till yesterday. Now it's it's it's
like a guy.
Speaker 5 (20:36):
Named Joe come along and squashed all our mud pies
for us.
Speaker 11 (20:39):
Looks to Mela more like it was a logic named Joe.
Speaker 9 (20:43):
What did you say, the logic named Joe?
Speaker 5 (20:46):
A logic name. But they're all alike?
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Good girt, baby.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Right, Frank, let me go, Honey, Look you hold the fort.
Speaker 5 (20:57):
Maybe they aren't all alike.
Speaker 9 (20:58):
Are you going, Frank? Going to make a getaway?
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Get away baby, if you've got the right inspiration, I'm
going straight to the middle of this hole jamboree.
Speaker 7 (21:17):
Yes, Oh, I was hoping it was the police.
Speaker 4 (21:21):
You remember me, mister Kolonovitch called well of the logics company.
Speaker 7 (21:23):
Logic's company. I wish the logic's company was at the
bottom of the ocean.
Speaker 5 (21:27):
I don't blame you, believe me. Now, where's your logic
in here?
Speaker 8 (21:30):
I'd smash it into a million pieces if I wasn't
afraid of what Freddy would do to me.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
Look, just just get out of the way when I've
got business with Joe.
Speaker 10 (21:38):
If you want to do something and don't know how,
ask your logic.
Speaker 5 (21:43):
Oh, we're back to that routine. I want to do something,
all right?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Can a logic be modified to achieve correlations for which
human brains are too limited? Yes, how great will the modifications.
Speaker 10 (22:03):
Be microscopically slight changes in dimension not detectable even by
precision gauges. They can come about only through an extremely
improbable accident.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
And what would this superlogic then be able to do?
Come on, you spill it.
Speaker 10 (22:29):
It could set up entire new combinations of electronic relays
which would bypass the normal sensor blocks, thereby enabling it
to perform valuable new services, including the giving of helpful
advice on any human problem.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
Uh huh. And has this accident ever happened? Come on,
come on, It.
Speaker 10 (23:01):
Has happened only once, in the case of the logic
now and by the Kolonovitch family of one hundred and
nineteen seventh Street, a logic named Joe.
Speaker 5 (23:14):
Thanks Joe, that's all I wanted to know.
Speaker 7 (23:16):
What's all that about?
Speaker 5 (23:17):
I'm taking this logic away, mister Karanovitch. I'll bring you
a new one. And our troubles are all over.
Speaker 9 (23:22):
Hey, you get away from Joe.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
Correction, our troubles are just beginning.
Speaker 7 (23:25):
Ready to put down that bloke guy?
Speaker 9 (23:26):
I shut up, Hey, you I should get away from
the logic.
Speaker 5 (23:29):
Look, look, Freddy, I'm gonna bring you a nice new one.
See I want that one.
Speaker 9 (23:33):
Get you mixed off? And I got this beach? You
rate lemonade?
Speaker 8 (23:38):
Well?
Speaker 4 (23:39):
The Calwell, the police they're outside, Yeah for me and
Freddy nuts?
Speaker 9 (23:42):
What they want you for? You ain't smart enough to
do nothing?
Speaker 5 (23:45):
No, hey, there's plenty I could tell you. There's the cops. Kid,
it's you and me against them.
Speaker 9 (23:51):
So what you're gonna do about it? If you're so smart?
Speaker 5 (23:54):
Look, we may have to find our way out. Let
me see that blow down. I know a way to
hop it up so the cops won't have a chance.
Come on, come on, give it to me.
Speaker 9 (24:02):
Okay, let's see what you can do here.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
Thanks, here, let's stare called.
Speaker 7 (24:09):
Well, you're a great man.
Speaker 5 (24:11):
All I got left to do is pull this plug
out of the wall. Come right in, sergeant.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Well that must be the kids.
Speaker 7 (24:18):
You know.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
It looks so tough to me.
Speaker 4 (24:19):
Alli just got a little softening, No mean, no more complaints, officer.
Speaker 7 (24:24):
I guess I can go on where mister Caldwell left off.
Speaker 5 (24:26):
Caldwell, Hey, you want it now? Look, I just came
to pick up this busted logic. I don't know a thing.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
You said that before. Come on, you're going to the cooler.
Speaker 5 (24:35):
Let's go.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Wait a minute, you act like you wanted to go
to jail.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
Well, just till a certain party leaves town. I got
a feeling it's safer, okay.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Then called well into the paddy wagon.
Speaker 5 (24:47):
You go, thanks, officer.
Speaker 4 (24:48):
You may be saving my life now if you'll just
help me carry this logic out.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Wait a minute, you will. You can't take that in
the wagon?
Speaker 5 (24:55):
I can't. Why not? It's no room.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
You already got a damon. There was raising the roof.
Name Yeah blurned.
Speaker 4 (25:02):
Wayne Closman picked her up train by a gun without
a permit.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
She keeps screaming she's gonna miss.
Speaker 5 (25:07):
Her date with the Ducky.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
You have just heard X minus one presented by the
National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers
of Astounding science fiction. Tonight by transcription, X minus one
has brought you a logic named Joe, adapted for radio
by Claris Ross from the story by Murray Leinster. Featured
(25:37):
in the cast were Mandel Kramer, Wendell Holmes, Guy Repp,
Bill Zuckert, Walter Kinsella, Bob Hastings, Joseph Julian, Joey Fallon,
Mary Lou Forster, Anne Thomas, and Mary Patten. Your announcer,
Fred Collins. X minus one was directed by Daniel Sutter
(25:58):
and is an NBC Ready Network Productions. Next week, X
minus one will bring you a dramatization of Robert Heinlein's
famous science fiction masterpiece, The Roads Must Roll. It concerns
(26:19):
the day when traffic became so impossible that the engineers
took over and banned all automobiles, tore up the super highways,
and built huge mechanized roads which whirled along on giant rotors.
Speaker 12 (26:31):
It speeds up to one hundred miles an hour. An
engineering miracle changed the face of the nation. The rolling
roads took over. No one worried about the fact that
if the road should stop, our whole economic life would
fall apart. The machinery, they said, was perfect, but they
forgot that machinery depends on men, and men are not perfect.
(26:54):
Be sure that tune in next week at a new time,
same day for another exciting broadcast of X minus one.
Mm hmm, Calm down for blast off x minus five
four three two x minus one fire. From the far
(00:38):
horizons of the unknown come transcribed tales of new dimensions
in time and space. These are stories of the future
adventures in which you'll live in a million, could be years,
on a thousand, maybe worlds. The National Broadcasting Company, in
cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of Astounding Science Fiction,
presents he.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Minus one one.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
Tonight's story a logic named Joe by Murray Leinster.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
It was on the third day of August that Joe
come off the assembly line, and on the fourth Loreen
came into town, and that afternoon I save civilization.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
Loraine is a blonde.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
I was crazy about once, and Joe is a new
nineteen seventy four model logic that I've got stored away
down in the cellar.
Speaker 5 (01:44):
And how do I save civilizations?
Speaker 3 (01:45):
You're listening now to a voice from the future, the
voice of Frank Caldwell, head serviceman for the Logics Corporation,
makers of the machine that does everything.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
For you, well nearly everything, anyway, the electronic logic.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
In the year we speak nineteen seventy four, no modern
home was completely of one, and the logic sets were
working so well that life was soft, indeed for repairman
Frank Caldwell, that is until that fatal day of August
the third, when suddenly the logics began doing everything for
their users and doing it myself too well.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
On the third of August, there wasn't much doing, and
I'm hanging around the boss's office smoking up his cigars.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
Frank, there's a customer outside. Go take care of him,
will you me?
Speaker 5 (02:27):
I'm a maintenance man.
Speaker 6 (02:28):
Mister Korlanovitch wants to have logics explained to him.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Explain who has he been on? Mys?
Speaker 6 (02:33):
I just moved up from the backwoods someplace.
Speaker 5 (02:35):
Oh why don't you explain him?
Speaker 7 (02:36):
Well, I don't feel too well.
Speaker 5 (02:37):
You were okay half an hour ago?
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Are you the boss?
Speaker 7 (02:39):
Here?
Speaker 6 (02:40):
Am I going out there? We are you?
Speaker 5 (02:41):
Okay? Okay? Oh, mister Karlanovitch, good morning. My name is Caldwell.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Can I help you?
Speaker 8 (02:48):
Thank you, mister Caldwell. This is my little boy, Freddie,
Hi shirt Freddy? Many times have I got to tell
you not to kick people in the sheens?
Speaker 5 (02:58):
Excuse it please, mister Carlin Well, Oh sure, sure, just
a kid.
Speaker 9 (03:02):
I got a knife phone could cut you into little pieces.
Speaker 8 (03:07):
We'd like to buy a logic, mister Cagwell, the gentleman
we spoke to first said he had to leave.
Speaker 7 (03:12):
In a hurry.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
I'll fix him.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
Well, I understand that you're not acquainted with logic's mister Kolanovitch.
Speaker 7 (03:17):
That's right. We just moved to the city.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Huh.
Speaker 7 (03:20):
My wife, she saw everybody else at a logic.
Speaker 4 (03:23):
And you know how women, No, you bet well, you
can't get along without a logic in this day and age,
mister Kolanovitch, Look, I.
Speaker 9 (03:30):
Got a snake you want to see.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
And now about the logic here, I'll just plug in
this one right here. Now you see, the logic looks
kind of like an old fashioned television set, only it's
got keys instead of dials. Now, a lot of the
keys a standard like the television stations, and use the
stock market quotes and so on. Of course, if you
want to talk to somebody, you just punched the number
of his logic.
Speaker 5 (03:52):
It's it's like making an old fashioned phone call.
Speaker 7 (03:55):
But there can't be keys for everything.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
No, no, no, no no.
Speaker 4 (03:59):
Let's say that you want to ask question like what
to take for a sore throat or who won the
American League Pennant in nineteen hundred and eleven. You turn
on the logic, then you just punched the question key
and ask like this, who was the first President of
the United States?
Speaker 10 (04:18):
George Washington?
Speaker 7 (04:20):
There you see, but I already knew that.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
Well, of course that was just a sample.
Speaker 7 (04:26):
I got a little store. Will it keep books for me?
Speaker 4 (04:28):
It will keep your books, record your contracts, serve as
a filing system, and check up on what happened to
your lawyer's last client anything.
Speaker 7 (04:35):
Hey, they're really something, these things.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Ten thousand services and information sources in one read our advertising.
Speaker 7 (04:42):
What I want to know, mister Caldwell, how do these
logics work?
Speaker 5 (04:45):
Of course?
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Now you saw that big building across the street. Sure,
well that's one of the relay tanks.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
You see.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
There are a dozen of them all around the country,
and they're all hooked up together. And there's a data
plate in one of those tanks for every fact in creation.
Anything that you want to see hear, You just punch
for it and the logic gives you the answer.
Speaker 9 (05:03):
Hey, listen, could I ask this thing how to make
dart poison?
Speaker 5 (05:06):
How to make what dart poison?
Speaker 8 (05:09):
Like?
Speaker 9 (05:09):
In Africa. How could shoot the dogs through my bean shooter?
Speaker 7 (05:12):
Maybe I think maybe we better not get one of
these things.
Speaker 5 (05:15):
Oh no, no, no, no, it's perfectly all right, mister Karlanovich.
The logic won't tell you that.
Speaker 9 (05:18):
I bet it will. I'm gonna try it. Hey, how
do you make dart poison.
Speaker 10 (05:28):
A big policy for bitches? This service?
Speaker 5 (05:31):
Oh?
Speaker 9 (05:32):
What did do that for?
Speaker 4 (05:33):
What kind of some little breath? Because some people might
ask things that aren't good for them.
Speaker 9 (05:37):
Listen, I don't like this here one. I want that
one over there.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Kid, They're all alike.
Speaker 9 (05:42):
I want that one. If I can't have that one,
I'm gonna hold my breath till I'm dead.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
I got a lot of time.
Speaker 7 (05:47):
It's no use, mister carr Wall, you might as well
give him the one he wants.
Speaker 4 (05:50):
Look, kid, there's so much alike that even I can't
tell them apart I can, and I want Joe.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Joe. Who's Joe?
Speaker 8 (05:58):
I guess he means the logic, mister carrwh he has
to think up a name to call everything.
Speaker 7 (06:03):
You should hear some of the names he calls me.
Speaker 9 (06:05):
Not till I'm twenty one, I promised, mother.
Speaker 5 (06:08):
Okay, so we call him Joe. But them things are
all alike to one ten thousands of an inch.
Speaker 9 (06:12):
I don't care. I bet he'll teach me how to
make dart poison.
Speaker 4 (06:16):
Okay, then come on, Joe. So he keeps yelling I
want that one. I want that one. I'm gonna call
him Joe.
Speaker 10 (06:35):
Mike.
Speaker 4 (06:35):
I tell you I could have wrung his neck. How
many cards I'll draw it two? What a holy terror
he had his father scared to death.
Speaker 5 (06:42):
It's too bad that kid ain't mine. And I'd show
him quick enough who was boss in the family. Oh,
holy smoke, I'm sorry, fellas.
Speaker 4 (06:49):
I gotta hold up the hand him and I just remembered,
I gotta call my wife letter weight.
Speaker 5 (06:53):
You ever met my wife? Hey, matter with this thing?
You ain't get in my house.
Speaker 10 (07:02):
Bouncing new and improved Logic Service. Your logic is now
equipped to give not only consultative, but directive advice. If
you want to do something and don't know how to
do it, ask your logic.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
Hey, did you guys hear that?
Speaker 6 (07:19):
Well?
Speaker 5 (07:19):
They should have told us about it. It was just
somebody trying to pull a gag.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
It didn't sound like a gag to me.
Speaker 5 (07:24):
Yeah, maybe the boss decided to add a new logic service.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Look, the minute the system starts giving advice, some joker
like you was going to be asking questions like.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
How do I get rid of my wife? Oh no,
the boss knows better than It's not anything like that. Yeah,
but you heard what the logic just said. Oh listen,
the censor circuits will block the question. You don't believe me,
go ahead and try it. No anything for a gag.
Speaker 1 (07:45):
Okay, logic, I got a question for you, How do
I get rid of my wife?
Speaker 10 (07:52):
Service? Question? Is your wife blonde or brunette?
Speaker 5 (07:57):
Did they hear that she's a blonde?
Speaker 10 (08:05):
Exy Krylo Bintine is a constituent of green shoe polish.
Take home a frozen meal containing pea soup. Color the
soup with green shoe polish. This poison is fatal to
blonde females only. This fact is a product of logic service.
You cannot be convicted of murder. It is improbable that
(08:29):
you will be suspected.
Speaker 4 (08:31):
This is preserved and it's bound to be right. These
things can't make a mistake. Well, Mike, don't just stand.
Let's check the census circuits quick.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
We can't get to them.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
They're all sealed up. It's supposed to be impossible for
them to go.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Out of order.
Speaker 5 (08:42):
Well, they're out of order now. And I got a
feeling that some awful things are gonna happen.
Speaker 7 (09:00):
Us.
Speaker 5 (09:00):
We've got to do something. The logics have gone nuts.
Speaker 6 (09:02):
I relaxed the thing, gave a goofy answer once. Maybe
it was a joke, but it was an accident. No,
forget it, it won't happen again.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
What makes you so sure people are going to be
trying it? Look, look, supposing I wanted to get rid
of you, for.
Speaker 6 (09:14):
Instance, you don't how would you collect your pants? I know,
but just supposing not that, we'll try it.
Speaker 10 (09:21):
If you want to do something and don't know how,
ask your logic.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
How do I bump off my boss? Male, fat, bald headed,
and forty five?
Speaker 10 (09:35):
Make some chocolate ice cream containing powdered charcoal. In place
of half the chocolate, use hot sobrand charcoal. Hot so So
contains an ingredient fatal only to fat bald headed males.
This fact is a product of logic service.
Speaker 6 (09:53):
And I look, Frank, I admit these things have gone
a little wacky, but there's nothing to worry about nothing
to worry about.
Speaker 5 (09:58):
If this keeps up, what are you that we'll have
to shut down the company?
Speaker 6 (10:01):
You're kidding. We can't shut down the company, and you
know it. Logics have taken the place of everything but
night baseball. We shut them down, we go back to
a civilization that we've forgotten.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
How to run.
Speaker 5 (10:10):
It's the boss. There is no telling what they'll do.
Speaker 6 (10:12):
Listen, now you've asked these questions for a gag. Nobody's
going to ask them seriously. What you need is a
little faith in human nature. Excuse me, it's probably my wife.
Speaker 10 (10:23):
How do you see you?
Speaker 2 (10:24):
All right?
Speaker 6 (10:24):
Just fine, sweetheart? What you been doing?
Speaker 10 (10:26):
I just call?
Speaker 11 (10:28):
I've got your sasner dessert?
Speaker 5 (10:32):
What kind holy chocolate ice cream?
Speaker 9 (10:36):
Sirs? When you just come?
Speaker 10 (10:40):
What's wrong?
Speaker 9 (10:42):
Why don't you any.
Speaker 5 (10:45):
Chalked with ice cream?
Speaker 7 (10:47):
This can't be happening?
Speaker 6 (10:48):
Why this this is awful? These logics are dangerous humans. Now,
corn well, you're the head of the maintenance crew. I'll
give you twenty four hours to fix. These logics are
your fire. Now look what are you standing there for?
Getting the service car? Get moving where anywhere? Find out
what the logics are up to and see that you
find out before the logics do.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
But un bounder, give me a double lash night.
Speaker 7 (11:19):
I have a little drink. What'd you matter if you
had a bad day? Excuse me, but listen, file, you
gotta listen. I got troubles.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
But will you get this bar fly off of me? Oh,
don't say that I got troubles.
Speaker 7 (11:31):
How am I going to keep my wife from finding
out I had a couple of little drinks? How am
I gonna do it?
Speaker 5 (11:37):
Mister?
Speaker 4 (11:37):
It's a hot day, and I've been driving a car
around in and see, and I've been trying to keep
a bank president from having apoplexy on a kind of
his logic told him how to rob his own bank.
I've been trying to stop six year olds from asking
what comes after the bees and the flowers, and their fathers.
Speaker 5 (11:50):
From asking how to get a million dollars by tomorrow.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
I've been tripping over a dead body so artistically croaked
that nobody's ever gonna.
Speaker 5 (11:55):
Find out who's done it. And all you got on
your mind is how how am I gonna keep my
wife from fighting? I've been drinking R up. Will you
go ask the logic?
Speaker 10 (12:02):
My pile?
Speaker 7 (12:03):
My boy, where's the logic, where's.
Speaker 5 (12:05):
That log right behind you? Here, here's a nickel.
Speaker 7 (12:07):
I gotta hair a come on, logic, old pile, old pile.
Be nice out as a guy keeper his wife from
finding out he's had a couple of little drinks.
Speaker 5 (12:20):
Answer me that.
Speaker 10 (12:25):
By a bottle of Frannine hair shampoo. It is harmless,
but contains an ingredient which instantly neutralizes alcohol one teaspoonful
for each gigger you have consumed.
Speaker 6 (12:38):
Oh boy, oh boy, gotta buy a bottle of gotta
buy a bottle of.
Speaker 10 (12:44):
What was that again?
Speaker 7 (12:45):
I pusn't.
Speaker 8 (12:45):
It's right, you'll never remember it. As far as the
drug store, I think there's a bottle in the back room.
Somebody left it.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Oh my pid, Oh my boy, No more troubles.
Speaker 9 (12:54):
You're just show me a way.
Speaker 7 (12:58):
I got a picture of him back there, drinking shampoo.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Yeah, give me another double.
Speaker 7 (13:04):
I don't know what's worse to be as low as
you are, as high as him.
Speaker 9 (13:07):
Where is he? I know he's here? Where is that
far you want?
Speaker 7 (13:10):
Lady?
Speaker 9 (13:11):
My husband? I know he's here. Where is he.
Speaker 10 (13:15):
That?
Speaker 9 (13:15):
No good louse house?
Speaker 10 (13:17):
Show him?
Speaker 9 (13:18):
I think he's coming home staggering again? Doessy well?
Speaker 7 (13:21):
I'll teach him, poor guy.
Speaker 4 (13:23):
Why, my dear, what a surprise to see you here, Archibald.
Speaker 5 (13:28):
You're sober, of course, my love. I am sober as
a judge.
Speaker 9 (13:32):
And what are you doing in a saloon?
Speaker 5 (13:34):
Your suspicion wounds me deeply, my love.
Speaker 12 (13:37):
Let me tell you, my dear, that I've been conducting
a research project that is going to make us a fortune.
Speaker 7 (13:42):
I am going to pattern.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Sober a drink that makes happy home.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
Look at this bladder, cold well blank. The greatest crime
even history, and weekend even make an arrest. They're all
perfect crimes.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
Thanks to the logic, the sogeant, we're doing our best
to find Well, that's not good enough.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
You can't find out what's back.
Speaker 4 (14:11):
Of They shut down the company, rust the police department
with nobody is back of it. The logics run themselves.
They pick their own circuits automatically.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
You mean they're doing all this by themselves.
Speaker 4 (14:22):
Sure, we always knew they could do a lot more
things than we knew about. I think they're just trying
to be helpful, that's all.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
That's all. Well, you better make them cut out the tricks,
including this new business they're up to.
Speaker 5 (14:34):
Now, what new business?
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Just started an hour ago. Every time you turn on
the logic.
Speaker 6 (14:41):
It asks your name, and then it speels out the
whole history of your life.
Speaker 5 (14:46):
I haven't heard about that. What's to do that for?
Speaker 7 (14:48):
You?
Speaker 4 (14:48):
Tell me?
Speaker 2 (14:50):
God? Go ahead, try it?
Speaker 5 (14:51):
Okay?
Speaker 10 (14:53):
What is your name?
Speaker 5 (14:55):
Do you like that? I'm Frank Caldwell.
Speaker 10 (14:58):
Frank Caldwell. Are you ever called ducky?
Speaker 6 (15:02):
Ducky?
Speaker 5 (15:04):
Lay you off with your fellow? What if I was?
Speaker 10 (15:06):
It's been years, Ducky, there is a call for you.
Speaker 5 (15:13):
Hello, Ducky, Holy cats, Loreen.
Speaker 10 (15:18):
Ducky dolling?
Speaker 4 (15:19):
How molly, hey, let me get a little gosh, Loreen?
Speaker 5 (15:24):
Where are you?
Speaker 10 (15:25):
I'm in a hotel. I just got into town. Oh, Ducky.
Wasn't it smart of the logic to find you?
Speaker 5 (15:32):
The logic to find me?
Speaker 10 (15:34):
I asked it?
Speaker 9 (15:35):
How to find Duky?
Speaker 10 (15:37):
You must have an unlisted number. Dollar you're not in
the directory?
Speaker 4 (15:40):
Well, uh gee uh? Have you been Loreen since since
I saw you?
Speaker 5 (15:45):
Last? I heard you got married?
Speaker 11 (15:47):
You won't believe me, donkey, I know, but I've had
four husbands, and I've never loved anybody as much as
I love you.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
You've divorced four husbands, three the last one died unexpected?
Speaker 5 (16:02):
Who unexpected?
Speaker 1 (16:03):
He did?
Speaker 10 (16:05):
But the jury acquitted me.
Speaker 9 (16:06):
Donkey, they knew it was just a little old accident.
Speaker 10 (16:09):
So now I'm free again, and we got lots of
things to talk over. You come right out over here.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
Oh well, Lorraine, I'm I'm working, you see, and I'll
call you back, all right.
Speaker 10 (16:23):
He is a kid. M that'll have to hold you till.
Speaker 5 (16:27):
You get here. Oh my back.
Speaker 4 (16:32):
What am I gonna do do?
Speaker 2 (16:35):
Like you were telling me a while ago. Huh, calm yourself, ducky.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Call on the logic for you, Frank, your wife? Oh thanks, Mike,
Hi gurd Frank.
Speaker 11 (16:56):
I've been trying to get you for an.
Speaker 4 (16:58):
I've been not making calls, honey, trying to find out
what ails these logics.
Speaker 9 (17:01):
Well, you better find out in a hurry.
Speaker 10 (17:03):
There's going to be trouble.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
No, no, look good not just take it easy. Huh.
Speaker 11 (17:05):
Well, you can't let this happen to me. They're asking
everybody's name, and when you tell your name, it reels.
Speaker 9 (17:11):
Off your whole history.
Speaker 4 (17:12):
Well, honey, I don't think they're doing that anymore. I
think that was just just temporary.
Speaker 10 (17:15):
Well, in the.
Speaker 11 (17:15):
Meantime, it's told everybody in the neighborhood all about me.
I punched missus Hudson's name. She's been married three times
and she's had mister Hudson arrested twice but non support
and once for beating her up. It'll tell anybody anything.
Speaker 5 (17:27):
Yeah, but look good.
Speaker 11 (17:27):
I'll tell you you stop these things, and I'm gonna
leave you.
Speaker 5 (17:31):
Oh honey, you don't mean that I do.
Speaker 11 (17:33):
If you can't figure out how to keep off private
lives out of every logic in the town that I'm
through and that settles it.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
I can't even budge any of these relay plates me.
Isn't there some way we can disconnect them?
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Nope, there is not.
Speaker 5 (17:53):
They weren't built to be disconnected. The censors circuits were
supposed to take care of cutting them off. No, that's
for Frank.
Speaker 10 (18:01):
Hello, Dakey Darling.
Speaker 5 (18:03):
Oh Loreen, not again, ducky Darling.
Speaker 10 (18:06):
I'm so lone.
Speaker 9 (18:07):
Since why haven't you come over?
Speaker 5 (18:09):
Why I've been busy?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
Oh, poor ducky.
Speaker 9 (18:14):
No, let's get.
Speaker 5 (18:16):
Married, gosh, Loreen. I well, what I mean is.
Speaker 9 (18:20):
Right away, you're not busy tonight, are you?
Speaker 5 (18:23):
Look? Loreen? I got married?
Speaker 9 (18:26):
Oh, poor boy.
Speaker 10 (18:27):
My poor ducky.
Speaker 4 (18:28):
Well we'll just get you out of that No, no, no, no, no, look, Loreene, it's.
Speaker 10 (18:32):
All arranged, darling.
Speaker 9 (18:33):
I'll just call up your wife and have a little talk.
Speaker 5 (18:35):
No, no, please, Loreen. I mean, it's nice of you
to think of me and all, but you.
Speaker 10 (18:39):
Just give me your address and your logic number.
Speaker 5 (18:41):
I haven't got one.
Speaker 9 (18:42):
Never mind, it's the logic we'll find out for me.
Speaker 5 (18:46):
Loreen, Loreen, you get away from that thing and give
me a.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Yes Mike in a minute. First, I've got to call
my wife. We gotta get out of town.
Speaker 5 (18:54):
Oh lord, I made a mistake.
Speaker 6 (18:56):
Frank. You're supposed to be helping Mike.
Speaker 5 (18:58):
Yeah, I am, boss, I am, But I gotta make
this call.
Speaker 7 (19:00):
What do I care about your call?
Speaker 6 (19:01):
President's getting ready to close down the company and declared
martiall law.
Speaker 5 (19:04):
Now, for the love of Heaven.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Deuced ask for us.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
I will, I will.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
I've just got to make this one call before the
logics get on my trail.
Speaker 10 (19:12):
To assist in solving a special problem of logic service.
Kindly give the following information, if possible. Where does Frank
callwell live?
Speaker 5 (19:21):
They got me. I'm through, look, Gert, will you please
not ask any more questions? I told you I was leaving, honey,
leave me later right now. W you pack up yourself
and the kids. We got to get out of here.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
What is all this?
Speaker 9 (19:43):
Are the cops after you or something?
Speaker 10 (19:45):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (19:45):
Yeah, that's it. That's it, the cops.
Speaker 4 (19:47):
Now get moving, honey, William and when you get away
from that logic.
Speaker 9 (19:49):
But don't you think we ought to hear the police call?
Speaker 10 (19:55):
Twenty seven and God thirty one detailed around up all
employees of the logic's company. Use caution. They are suspected
of sedition.
Speaker 5 (20:04):
Well, le smoke. The cops are after me.
Speaker 10 (20:08):
Car seventeen precede a vicinity of one one nine East
seventh Street. Child terrorizing neighborhood. Use extreme caution. Child is
armed with bean shooter using poison dots.
Speaker 5 (20:21):
Freddy Who's Freddy? Something I met once in a horrible nightmare.
He wanted a logic that would tell him how to
make dot poison. They're all alike, I kept telling him,
they're all alike?
Speaker 9 (20:29):
Are you talking about?
Speaker 10 (20:31):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I don't know, gird. All I know is it was
a nice world up till yesterday. Now it's it's it's
like a guy.
Speaker 5 (20:36):
Named Joe come along and squashed all our mud pies
for us.
Speaker 11 (20:39):
Looks to Mela more like it was a logic named Joe.
Speaker 9 (20:43):
What did you say, the logic named Joe?
Speaker 5 (20:46):
A logic name. But they're all alike?
Speaker 2 (20:51):
Good girt, baby.
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Right, Frank, let me go, Honey, Look you hold the fort.
Speaker 5 (20:57):
Maybe they aren't all alike.
Speaker 9 (20:58):
Are you going, Frank? Going to make a getaway?
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Get away baby, if you've got the right inspiration, I'm
going straight to the middle of this hole jamboree.
Speaker 7 (21:17):
Yes, Oh, I was hoping it was the police.
Speaker 4 (21:21):
You remember me, mister Kolonovitch called well of the logics company.
Speaker 7 (21:23):
Logic's company. I wish the logic's company was at the
bottom of the ocean.
Speaker 5 (21:27):
I don't blame you, believe me. Now, where's your logic
in here?
Speaker 8 (21:30):
I'd smash it into a million pieces if I wasn't
afraid of what Freddy would do to me.
Speaker 5 (21:34):
Look, just just get out of the way when I've
got business with Joe.
Speaker 10 (21:38):
If you want to do something and don't know how,
ask your logic.
Speaker 5 (21:43):
Oh, we're back to that routine. I want to do something,
all right?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Can a logic be modified to achieve correlations for which
human brains are too limited? Yes, how great will the modifications.
Speaker 10 (22:03):
Be microscopically slight changes in dimension not detectable even by
precision gauges. They can come about only through an extremely
improbable accident.
Speaker 4 (22:20):
And what would this superlogic then be able to do?
Come on, you spill it.
Speaker 10 (22:29):
It could set up entire new combinations of electronic relays
which would bypass the normal sensor blocks, thereby enabling it
to perform valuable new services, including the giving of helpful
advice on any human problem.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
Uh huh. And has this accident ever happened? Come on,
come on, It.
Speaker 10 (23:01):
Has happened only once, in the case of the logic
now and by the Kolonovitch family of one hundred and
nineteen seventh Street, a logic named Joe.
Speaker 5 (23:14):
Thanks Joe, that's all I wanted to know.
Speaker 7 (23:16):
What's all that about?
Speaker 5 (23:17):
I'm taking this logic away, mister Karanovitch. I'll bring you
a new one. And our troubles are all over.
Speaker 9 (23:22):
Hey, you get away from Joe.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
Correction, our troubles are just beginning.
Speaker 7 (23:25):
Ready to put down that bloke guy?
Speaker 9 (23:26):
I shut up, Hey, you I should get away from
the logic.
Speaker 5 (23:29):
Look, look, Freddy, I'm gonna bring you a nice new one.
See I want that one.
Speaker 9 (23:33):
Get you mixed off? And I got this beach? You
rate lemonade?
Speaker 8 (23:38):
Well?
Speaker 4 (23:39):
The Calwell, the police they're outside, Yeah for me and
Freddy nuts?
Speaker 9 (23:42):
What they want you for? You ain't smart enough to
do nothing?
Speaker 5 (23:45):
No, hey, there's plenty I could tell you. There's the cops. Kid,
it's you and me against them.
Speaker 9 (23:51):
So what you're gonna do about it? If you're so smart?
Speaker 5 (23:54):
Look, we may have to find our way out. Let
me see that blow down. I know a way to
hop it up so the cops won't have a chance.
Come on, come on, give it to me.
Speaker 9 (24:02):
Okay, let's see what you can do here.
Speaker 5 (24:04):
Thanks, here, let's stare called.
Speaker 7 (24:09):
Well, you're a great man.
Speaker 5 (24:11):
All I got left to do is pull this plug
out of the wall. Come right in, sergeant.
Speaker 2 (24:17):
Well that must be the kids.
Speaker 7 (24:18):
You know.
Speaker 5 (24:18):
It looks so tough to me.
Speaker 4 (24:19):
Alli just got a little softening, No mean, no more complaints, officer.
Speaker 7 (24:24):
I guess I can go on where mister Caldwell left off.
Speaker 5 (24:26):
Caldwell, Hey, you want it now? Look, I just came
to pick up this busted logic. I don't know a thing.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
You said that before. Come on, you're going to the cooler.
Speaker 5 (24:35):
Let's go.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Wait a minute, you act like you wanted to go
to jail.
Speaker 5 (24:40):
Well, just till a certain party leaves town. I got
a feeling it's safer, okay.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Then called well into the paddy wagon.
Speaker 5 (24:47):
You go, thanks, officer.
Speaker 4 (24:48):
You may be saving my life now if you'll just
help me carry this logic out.
Speaker 2 (24:51):
Wait a minute, you will. You can't take that in
the wagon?
Speaker 5 (24:55):
I can't. Why not? It's no room.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
You already got a damon. There was raising the roof.
Name Yeah blurned.
Speaker 4 (25:02):
Wayne Closman picked her up train by a gun without
a permit.
Speaker 2 (25:05):
She keeps screaming she's gonna miss.
Speaker 5 (25:07):
Her date with the Ducky.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
You have just heard X minus one presented by the
National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers
of Astounding science fiction. Tonight by transcription, X minus one
has brought you a logic named Joe, adapted for radio
by Claris Ross from the story by Murray Leinster. Featured
(25:37):
in the cast were Mandel Kramer, Wendell Holmes, Guy Repp,
Bill Zuckert, Walter Kinsella, Bob Hastings, Joseph Julian, Joey Fallon,
Mary Lou Forster, Anne Thomas, and Mary Patten. Your announcer,
Fred Collins. X minus one was directed by Daniel Sutter
(25:58):
and is an NBC Ready Network Productions. Next week, X
minus one will bring you a dramatization of Robert Heinlein's
famous science fiction masterpiece, The Roads Must Roll. It concerns
(26:19):
the day when traffic became so impossible that the engineers
took over and banned all automobiles, tore up the super highways,
and built huge mechanized roads which whirled along on giant rotors.
Speaker 12 (26:31):
It speeds up to one hundred miles an hour. An
engineering miracle changed the face of the nation. The rolling
roads took over. No one worried about the fact that
if the road should stop, our whole economic life would
fall apart. The machinery, they said, was perfect, but they
forgot that machinery depends on men, and men are not perfect.
(26:54):
Be sure that tune in next week at a new time,
same day for another exciting broadcast of X minus one.
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