The Infamous Jello

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:10):
La Joya Cosmetic Surgery Center is the place to go
if you're looking to rejuvenate your appearance, tighten and shape
your body, and just just something special for yourself. You
deserve to look your very best.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
Laoya Cosmetic Surgery Center offers over ninety procedures and treatments
for a natural, youthful appearance. They are absolutely the best
in the business. Try out their treatment planner at glamfam
dot com. It's so easy and amazing to use.

Speaker 1 (00:33):
We can't say enough great things about their Board certified
plastic surgeons. And guess what they offer flexible payment plans
so you can start your journey to a better you
right now.

Speaker 2 (00:43):
Free consultations too. The very best in the business is
in our own backyard. How lucky are we?

Speaker 1 (00:49):
Make sure you tell them that Laura Kane after Dark
sent you. We love everything about La Joya Cosmetic Surgery Center.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Go to Glamfam dot com.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
Hi, everybody, Welcome to Laura after Dark. It's December twenty
twenty four. We're officially in the Christmas Hanka. No, I
can't I can't even believe that Sunday was December first.
Rent is already due that that only means the first
of the month always means to me, Oh god, where

(01:20):
am I going to come up with the rent?

Speaker 2 (01:21):
Oh my boy? Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
But anyway, I haven't tell the force to pay it.
Oh so again, anyway, that's beside the place on dates.
Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark. I'm Laura Kane. This
is Eric Rimmery. We have producer Bryan.

Speaker 2 (01:35):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (01:36):
My mom is a big fan. Surprisingly surprisingly well, I'm
not surprised. I had to teach her how to listen.
I've taught her, I'm not even kidding, maybe twelve times
how to listen to a podcast. There are so many
different ways. I go, Mom, you just press this, you
press that, you go there. It's so easy. So I

(02:00):
wrote it down. She figured it out. We were listening
and you were making fun of me for something and
she was laughing. She thought it was so funny. I'm like,
oh my gosh, some people complain about him.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
Mom.

Speaker 1 (02:11):
He's like, She's like, oh no, he's funny. And I
love my Eric.

Speaker 2 (02:16):
Oh of course, I'm Maria great.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
My mom like, I'm the third on my mom's list
even on the show. Oh wow, Oh, I have so
much to tell you about my mom's house.

Speaker 3 (02:28):
I hope her mom's listening, because she's the only approval
I need.

Speaker 1 (02:32):
I highly doubted because this whole live Instagram. Oh that's
beyond her knowl question.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
I hope listen to this at some point.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
I know me too, Me too, all right. I just
wanted to tell you that coming up next week, guys,
comedian mal Hall will be sitting right here judging you
about my Hall, who is a resident at the Lafayette Hotel.
That's where he performs. He's performed so much any places.

(03:00):
He even has a Netflix special that's being sold right
now to Netflix. Or he's being it's gonna be so great.
He is amazing. I love him. He's gonna be our
judge for our stand up comedy contest. I hope you
guys have started writing your your big Yes.

Speaker 3 (03:18):
I actually I talked to him. I'm gonna be filling
in for him at the Lafayette while he's here. Oh okay, okay,
I'm not gonna be doing I'm just gonna be judging people.

Speaker 2 (03:26):
He said.

Speaker 1 (03:27):
It's gonna be a little awkward and weird and harder
to perform in front of one rather than an audience.
But we can do it. We don't have to make
it long.

Speaker 3 (03:39):
Well, we'll be performing in front of three people.

Speaker 1 (03:41):
Well, yeah, yeah, that's it. You won't laugh, I'm sure. Well,
I know I won't get any laughs from Brian for mine.

Speaker 3 (03:49):
We'll say something funny and you definitely will.

Speaker 1 (03:52):
I think you'll laugh, not laugh just because, no, you'll
be that way.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
I'll laugh it's funny.

Speaker 1 (03:58):
So I've tried to sit down and write of and
I just I'm like, I don't even know where to start, Like,
how do you even write a joke?

Speaker 2 (04:05):
Hey? You know we can slide right now.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
Well, I'm going to look on YouTube tonight and I'm
gonna I'm going to go to YouTube University and I'm
going to learn how to write.

Speaker 3 (04:16):
Stand up no knock knock jokes. No, I can't write
your ound knock knock jokes something like that. I think
stand up comedy.

Speaker 1 (04:22):
I understand that, like more like self deprecating humor. Oh,
stuff like that. I don't know.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
It's going to be a disaster.

Speaker 1 (04:32):
Things that I noticed in society that as good. Yes,
So I kind of know where I'm going. So anyway,
next week Monday Night Live, mal Hall will be in
with us to judge our contest. And then on Monday,
we're also going to announce what's in our big, fat,
fabulous holiday box. So fun. Remember last year? Oh yes,

(04:54):
we have several things already in the box, but we're
not ready to announce all the things. And I will
tell you how to win that box. Next week it's
going to be filled to the brim. I have to
find a box big enough to fit all this stuff.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (05:08):
And then the week after that it is on the
TIMU Christmas Gift Exchange.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
Now I have a bone to pick with you, Okay.
Laura and I were talking on Thanksgiving and she had
the brilliant idea that I send one of the items
that I was getting her to our sister from another mister,
my soul sister Jenny.

Speaker 1 (05:37):
My sister Jent.

Speaker 2 (05:38):
Yes, and I did.

Speaker 1 (05:41):
She's very impartial, she's very honest, and she doesn't there's
no bs with.

Speaker 2 (05:45):
Her correct And she said, and I quote, I think
you may go down. So I want you to know
how much I have spent at TEMU this year on
your ass, because I scrapped everything you did and went

(06:06):
deep diving into the dark web, darker than you. All
I have to say is if anybody shows up at
my house and arrests me for what is coming in
the mail. No, like what a gun?

Speaker 1 (06:24):
Or like it? Uh okay, I don't even I'm so
excited about this gift exchange.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
No I'm not, because Jenny's very impartial, and now I'm worried.

Speaker 1 (06:38):
I showed them all the things, and I laid it
out how it's going to go down. And that's why
she said. When she saw your thing or whatever, She's like, oh,
my sisters got it in the bag. Uh oh, I know. Oh,
I'm so excited.

Speaker 3 (06:53):
Both of your guys. Things are going to be mediocre.

Speaker 1 (06:56):
You think that, but I want you to be honest
when it we bust them out. Yeah, thank you.

Speaker 2 (07:01):
I'm always honest. You just don't like my honesty.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
I know. Half the time. I don't most of the time.
I don't.

Speaker 2 (07:07):
Brian, if I show you some of the stuff I
got Laura, would you won't tell her? Will you? No?
I won't tell her. Okay, I'm gonna show Brian.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
You're gonna show him like one thing, like a new
one of the new things you'd got.

Speaker 3 (07:19):
Why don't you show both of you guys, show me everything,
and I'll just have my private opinions.

Speaker 1 (07:23):
No, I'll show you one thing, and he'll show you
one thing.

Speaker 2 (07:26):
But show Brian show me your best yes thing.

Speaker 1 (07:29):
Okay, we'll do that in a second. Yeah, after we
talk about Doom Jewelry, we're going to talk about my
Thanksgiving at my mom's in Rancho Cuckamonga and all the
activities and adventures we got into. Oh boy, and things
I found out about my mom.

Speaker 2 (07:47):
Oh is this stuff we don't know?

Speaker 1 (07:49):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (07:50):
And it's like, what is it embarrassing?

Speaker 1 (07:53):
No, it's like, uh, I kind of know now why
I am the way I am.

Speaker 2 (07:58):
Oh God, I thought it all came my father. Apparently not. Okay, wait,
oh no, tell me, is this anything that's gonna tarnish
my perfect image of Mary?

Speaker 1 (08:12):
No, you'll respect her.

Speaker 2 (08:14):
Oh okay, Okay, so I think you.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
No, you'll understand me more.

Speaker 2 (08:23):
Okay, will we yes?

Speaker 1 (08:25):
Yes?

Speaker 2 (08:26):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (08:27):
When I was home, I told Jenny and my niece
Faith and my mom, I say, we have this new advertiser.
You guys have to look at their website, Dune Jewelry
dot com. Okay, I'm wearing a ring from Doom Drewry.
I wear this all the time. It's beautiful. You have

(08:47):
your ring. I wanted to show you. Here's the boxes
that they come in, and here's this is the first
piece I got.

Speaker 2 (08:55):
I love my ring.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
This is one I got from It's like a little
red uh. It's so cute. It's red sand Anyway, this
company was started by a woman named Holly Daniels Christiansen
on her kitchen table making jewelry and it is turned
into a multimillion dollar business. She has sand in elements
from all over the world and you design your own

(09:19):
piece of jewelry for yourself, for your friends, for your parents,
for your siblings. So my sister, my mom and I
each went through the dunejewelry dot com website to figure out,
like do we want a necklace or a ring or
a bracelet and what style? They have so many different
styles and other elements you can mix in with the

(09:41):
element that is the most important to you. So I
got the element that I was hoping for.

Speaker 2 (09:50):
Is this your dad, Welle?

Speaker 1 (09:53):
I would like you to introduce you to David ray Heater.
Nice to meet you, sir, David ray Heater. This small
guy I know, and you know what, there's some big
chunks in here too. Ashes are very strange. They're not ashes.
They are they are like there's some bones in there.

Speaker 2 (10:12):
I can't believe that you just have a bag of.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
Look, my mom put is like initials on it, like
so long ago. It's like but you know, you know
when I look at this, I'm like, we are so
much more than just our body. We are souls. Like
this is not him. He was so much more than
just this like ash. However, I'm going to send this
in to Dune Jewelry and I already have picked out

(10:37):
my mom picked out her bracelet and the different elements
she wants with the ashes, and then my sister and
my mom. Oh my gosh, I can't even wait. So
if you want to order something for Christmas, do it now. Yes,
pick your element, Go to Junejewelry dot com, and the
most important thing to get fifteen percent off your order.
Put in Laura Caane fifteen Easypasy, Laura Kane fifteen. Dune

(11:04):
Jewelry is so beautiful and it's so these will be
passed down to your kids and stuff like that. Like,
you did a really cool post about your ring and
your design. What was it like? What what did you say?

Speaker 2 (11:21):
I just and I actually called Holly the day after
and thanked her. It was it meant a lot to me.

Speaker 1 (11:28):
I know you had tears in your eyes.

Speaker 2 (11:30):
So and she's so nice and so my ring is
kind of a rectangle and it has the sand from
one of the regions that my dad grew up in
in Canada.

Speaker 1 (11:42):
Yes, yeah, and it meant a lot to you. And
I'm sure like.

Speaker 2 (11:46):
It's on my social media if you want to take a.

Speaker 1 (11:48):
Look at it on Instagram, Facebook, Instagram and Facebook. Okay, yeah,
So anyway, Doomjewelry dot Com promo code Laura Kane fifteen
get your special someone something they will never forget and
wear all the time. Thank you Doing Jewelry for being
a sponsor on Laura Kane After Dark. Hi Daddy, I

(12:11):
won't lose you. I promise I won't. You know what
when I was looking when I came when I was
about to talk about Dune, I couldn't find the ashes
where the actually, oh my god, I can't lose them again. Okay.
First of all, our dear friend Maggie bought us these
to kick off the holidays.

Speaker 2 (12:31):
Oh my god, these are so cute.

Speaker 1 (12:33):
So let's put them on because you know it's officially.

Speaker 2 (12:37):
I love it's timing and it's perfect that it's the
Grinch because for you.

Speaker 1 (12:46):
Okay, my head is so big. No hats fit me.
This doesn't even fit me. It's ridiculous. I'm taking it off. No,
I'll put it like right here you are, I'll put
it right here. No, it's funny, it's me.

Speaker 2 (12:58):
Just just pull it down over your.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
Such a big head, you wouldn't do. I look like
I have a giant head. Extra large hats don't fit
me like normal hats don't fit me.

Speaker 2 (13:09):
So cute, I know it is really super cute. Okay,
so Nike, you're adorable.

Speaker 1 (13:18):
Before we get into your holiday stories, I went to
my mom's house in Ranchacuca, Manga and we did a
lot of fun things. Like we we had Thanksgiving dinner
to get My brother was there. It was really great
to see Eric with a k I swear you really

(13:40):
are my brother from another from my same mother.

Speaker 2 (13:42):
That's why worshole mates truly.

Speaker 1 (13:45):
And so we had dinner and then we watched TV.
I've relaxed. I worked on something that I'm giving to
Evan for Christmas, and I got all this stuff done
for work, so I just got to be with my mom,
hang with my mom, and just treasure that time I'm
together with her, because you know, she turns eighty four
this month, and she's still in great health. She's a

(14:07):
little wobbly, but she is doing fine. And I just
know that every minute with her needs to be meaningful
because time is fleeting, you know. And so I learned
a lot I about my mom, first of all. First
of all, she made me my famous favorite thing on

(14:30):
the planet to eat. It's no rice and meat, right.

Speaker 2 (14:37):
And meat.

Speaker 1 (14:39):
We've called it rice and meat ever since I was
a little girl. It's it's technically like beef bergagnon or
not bolonaise, but something like that has red wine, it
has like garlic and onions, and it's sactet and it's
poured over rice. Anyway, it's I know it doesn't sound great,

(15:02):
but it is the most delicious thing. I ate an
entire pot of it. And then we went to the
Dollar Tree, where I found several fun things. And the
dollar Tree is not a dollar anymore.

Speaker 2 (15:16):
It's a dollar twenty five.

Speaker 1 (15:17):
And there are things in there that are five dollars.

Speaker 2 (15:19):
Yes there are.

Speaker 1 (15:20):
I think that is bs.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
I didn't know. People still went into those.

Speaker 1 (15:24):
Well, we got our nails done and it was right
across the tree at the Dollar Tree. No, and we
just looked over. We looked at each other and we're like,
let's go on our let's.

Speaker 2 (15:34):
Go on a run.

Speaker 1 (15:35):
Let's go on a dollar tree run.

Speaker 2 (15:36):
Were you wearing one of your sunglasses or that I
cover popped out?

Speaker 1 (15:41):
No?

Speaker 2 (15:41):
No, the second did pop out.

Speaker 1 (15:44):
They were fake and they were designer fake, but they
didn't pop out. Uh. Then my sister and my niece
and I went to the thrift store where I found
a lot of goodies, including Brian this classic Trivial Pursued
game Genius Edition. We're gonna bust it out because you

(16:07):
claim to be so good at trivia. Wait, two, the
pink tags were on sale fifty percent off, so this
was like a little bit more than a dollar. Oh my,
and it's like full. So we're gonna bust this out
in a future episode to see how smart you are.

Speaker 2 (16:26):
Actually we should do that. So yeah, yeah, we were
definitely the smarty pants doing this. I just know a
lot of random stuff.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
These lights, these trees came from the thrift store and
that was really fun. Then my sister, who lives with
my mom right now. Went to work on Saturday morning,
and my mom and I looked at each other. I said,
what do you think about going on a field trip?

(16:54):
And she's like, what are you saying, Laura, And I said, Mom,
there's a casino like twenty minutes away.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
Oh boy.

Speaker 1 (17:01):
And she's like, because she's just like me, She's like,
don't tell Jenny, my sister, because she'll get really mad.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
I go.

Speaker 1 (17:09):
If we go early enough in the morning, I won't
be so crowded and we'll just stay for two hours.
We'll only play one hundred dollars and then we'll leave.
So we did. We snuck away. We managed to come
back and my sister was home and she didn't ask
where we were. She thought we had gotten our nails
done that day. So we skated. But I just found

(17:31):
out why I'm so sneaky. Why I used to sneak
out of my house when I was a kid. When
I was in high school all the time, I used
to stuff the bed to make it look like I
was sleeping and sneak out all the time.

Speaker 2 (17:45):
All the time.

Speaker 1 (17:47):
I still am a sneaky person.

Speaker 2 (17:50):
My mom told me, thanks for telling us, no, thanks
for that.

Speaker 1 (17:53):
Well, I mean, hello, is this news to you?

Speaker 2 (17:56):
Anything that you say?

Speaker 1 (17:57):
Now, I just take risks.

Speaker 2 (18:01):
That's different.

Speaker 1 (18:02):
I like excitement. I do think, No, not that, but
like I get excited. Like I used to spy on
my neighbors. I used to hide in the bushes when
they were having parties and just spy and see what
they were up to. Like I just love.

Speaker 2 (18:20):
Stuff like that.

Speaker 1 (18:21):
I know, no they weren't. I was just like I
just like overhearing things and I just like sneaking around.
In not so horrible of a way. But my mom
told me that when she was in high school, she
grew up in La. She was born in LA and

(18:42):
her and her best friend, not Judy, but Melinda. They
were all three best friends. One night snuck out, went
down to Los Phelis, which is near Hollywood, climbed over
a fence underneath a tent, a giant white tent. There

(19:02):
was a huge party going on with a full on band.
It was lucieal Ball's Halloween party. Shut up and my
mom and Melinda snuck in and they got into the tent.
They looked around, how did you see anybody else famous?

(19:23):
And she was like naming off these like old school
celebrities that I didn't really recognize, but she did see
lucial Ball or anything because she got they got scared
because somebody saw them. So they went, oh my gosh.
So they went back and they left. They hopped back
over the fence. I go, you know what, Mom, I don't.
I didn't get this from dad. I got this from you.

(19:46):
I got this, this defiance and this sneakiness and from.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
You, mom.

Speaker 1 (19:52):
And she's like, I guess you did. I guess you did.
We watched ninety fIF Fiance, which was awesome.

Speaker 2 (20:00):
And then.

Speaker 1 (20:02):
Oh, she has a treat for both for Brian and I. Yes,
she sent home something for both of you. A present?

Speaker 2 (20:14):
Is it the jello?

Speaker 1 (20:15):
Hold on one second, well, I retrieve it.

Speaker 2 (20:18):
I can't wait to have some. What wasn't it grapefruit?
That was worse than that?

Speaker 1 (20:22):
This is a little Christmas Uh oh boy?

Speaker 2 (20:26):
Okay, what was it that was in it? Was it
green apple? And no, that was grape grapefruit and avocado.
I'm gonna throw up the avocados. I'm gonna throw up. Okay,
pineapple green jello is good though, Yeah that's not bad.
But if it's got avocado and grapefruit, in it. I

(20:48):
might vomit, all right, So I don't even like the
look of it already. It looks like scrambled eggs. Oh yeah,
it looks runny. I'm I'm gonna throw up already.

Speaker 1 (21:06):
This is.

Speaker 2 (21:11):
That looks like it looks like it looks like something
you scrape by, like pipes or something.

Speaker 1 (21:16):
I know.

Speaker 3 (21:17):
Oh God, that's what made the Ninja turtles. Ninja turtles.

Speaker 2 (21:21):
God.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
Yeah, I'm gonna tell you.

Speaker 2 (21:26):
Why did you give me the one with the most
in it? Oh God? What's the string? Oh God, this
is gonna be I don't know. This is gonna make
me sick.

Speaker 1 (21:37):
Take a take a big bite, and then I'll tell
you what's in it. Oh no, be honest, be honest.

Speaker 2 (21:45):
Like, Okay, there's a distinct lack of sweetness.

Speaker 1 (21:51):
Okay, this was the recipe, lime jello mixed with cottage cheese.

Speaker 2 (22:00):
I wonder, I don't know that's normal.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
Oh walnuts, Oh.

Speaker 2 (22:04):
Well, I'm allergic to walnuts. Thank you? Oh shit, trying
to kill me. It's live TV, so just trying to
kill me on.

Speaker 1 (22:16):
Oh pineapple? Yeah, and mayonnaise.

Speaker 2 (22:21):
The mayonnaise is probably the here.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
Why on God's green Earth did you see that recipe
back in the day and think that that was okay,
and this is.

Speaker 2 (22:34):
The good one.

Speaker 3 (22:34):
Oh oh, I've had green jello has been like a
staple of my thanksgivings forever.

Speaker 1 (22:39):
But did it ever look like that?

Speaker 2 (22:41):
Kind of Actually it looks similar, but it tastes way better.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
So why the mayonnaise?

Speaker 2 (22:46):
Why mani a why cottage geese?

Speaker 3 (22:49):
The cheese is normal, that gives Yeah, that just takes
on the flavor of everything else. Jello and pineapple is good.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
But I don't the mayo. I can taste the mayo.

Speaker 1 (22:58):
It makes no sense.

Speaker 2 (23:00):
Oh Laura, you can have mine. No way, It's just
not very sweet.

Speaker 1 (23:05):
I didn't eat it then, I won't eat it now,
thank you. But that's not the bad.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
But I just want to say it's not terrible. It's
just it needs less.

Speaker 2 (23:18):
That is awful.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
I dare you to take one more bite? No, no,
you can't access walnuts.

Speaker 2 (23:24):
You already took one bite. So are you going to
die now or probably?

Speaker 1 (23:28):
Do you feel like don't yong? Do you feel like you?
We'll see, We'll see what happens.

Speaker 2 (23:36):
Someone keep an eye on him.

Speaker 1 (23:38):
Why don't you take another big bite and just explain
the tastes that are coming from.

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Uh, honestly, it tastes like green jellow. There's just a
distinct lack of sweetness and just a weird presence of mayo.
You can kind of taste the mayo after maybe.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
After all, it is a side dish at dinner. It's
not assert at.

Speaker 2 (24:00):
Who's dinner, like before you are electrocuted somebody's last dinner.
It's not Okay, it's not that bad.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
This was my childhood. Okay, this is why I'm scarred.

Speaker 2 (24:11):
This is why you're rebellious.

Speaker 1 (24:12):
This is why I'm so picky.

Speaker 2 (24:13):
This is why you do what you're not supposed to.

Speaker 3 (24:15):
It tastes like clumpy, bland mayo with just a hint
of jella.

Speaker 1 (24:20):
Just like the warp. She was so excited to make
this for you guys have today.

Speaker 2 (24:26):
You know I enjoyed it. It just needs a little
less mayo and a little more sugar.

Speaker 1 (24:30):
Oh mayo, no mayo at all?

Speaker 2 (24:33):
Yuck.

Speaker 1 (24:34):
Okay, I think that's all I have to give you
and tell you. Okay, what about you? How was your Thanksgiving?

Speaker 2 (24:42):
Good?

Speaker 1 (24:43):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (24:43):
Come on?

Speaker 1 (24:44):
Did you do anything over the did you have all
the days off or just Friday? Or do you have
Saturday and Sunday two?

Speaker 2 (24:51):
I no, I worked.

Speaker 1 (24:54):
Okay, So did you spend it with friends?

Speaker 2 (24:57):
Did you.

Speaker 1 (24:59):
Care to allow operate on leg what you had or
what you did or what you did the next day?

Speaker 2 (25:06):
Thanks?

Speaker 1 (25:06):
Eric? Did you go Black Friday shopping?

Speaker 2 (25:09):
I did? Where I cannot say?

Speaker 1 (25:15):
Why is that such a secret?

Speaker 2 (25:17):
Because have you ever been there? I went to the mall?
Have you ever been on the podcast before? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (25:25):
You do need to tell we tell stories.

Speaker 2 (25:28):
Right mall? And it was what mall? Several? Would you buy?

Speaker 1 (25:37):
Why are you being so secretive and weird?

Speaker 2 (25:40):
I can't say. Why?

Speaker 1 (25:44):
Was it the one that you usually go to to
get your shoes?

Speaker 2 (25:48):
I did get this pair of shoes.

Speaker 1 (25:51):
You show this.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Wouldn't have said, you know what.

Speaker 1 (25:53):
He was on FaceTime with me and he goes, oh,
look at these shoes. I actually get him. I said,
don't get those and he gets them.

Speaker 3 (25:59):
Those look like Spaceman Austin Powers's.

Speaker 2 (26:01):
Yes they do. And see I don't know where I
get it from. I must get it from your mom.

Speaker 1 (26:06):
How much were those?

Speaker 2 (26:08):
Uh? They were they're pumas? Oh okay, yeah, I don't
two hundred much? They were no over one hundred.

Speaker 1 (26:21):
Okay, I can't. Okay, now, look, I can't ask him
yes or no questions, so I'm gonna have to ask
him a different way. What are the things? What are
the great deals you found on Black Friday?

Speaker 2 (26:33):
Stuff?

Speaker 1 (26:34):
Ah?

Speaker 2 (26:35):
Wait, can you tell us why you're being secret?

Speaker 1 (26:37):
Is it stuff you for me? For Brian? Is it?

Speaker 2 (26:41):
Like?

Speaker 3 (26:41):
I can't say, because sometimes you're secretive and nothing comes
of it, And I'm like, well, what was the point
of that? I know, like he sets up something big
and than just nothing happens.

Speaker 2 (26:48):
Clothes. You're being so tim who doesn't have a store.
So I got very good, some very good stuff.

Speaker 1 (26:56):
Did you shop today on Cyber Monday?

Speaker 2 (27:00):
It was nothing you did?

Speaker 3 (27:03):
Look, yeah, I thought there were some great deals. Didn't
want to spend money.

Speaker 1 (27:07):
You know what, why don't you just take a seat
on the couch. I'll do the podcast. You can just
watch since you're really not participating and it's really making meat.
It's maddening, my god. So that's all you did? Oh?
I had Thanksgiving dinner out here and then I went
shopping and I can't tell you where, and I bought.

Speaker 2 (27:26):
I can't tell you what I did. Watch Lindsay Lohan's
new movie on Netflix called Our Little Secret and it
was adorable. It was really fun.

Speaker 3 (27:36):
I think I think he went somewhere embarrassing and bought
something embarrassing.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
No, I didn't like.

Speaker 3 (27:41):
I don't know what else whether. I don't think there's
any of the malls, but I don't know there's like
a weird lingerie store and UTC is that I was.

Speaker 1 (27:49):
Trying to protect or who what he's trying to keep
from us?

Speaker 2 (27:53):
But whatever, you know what, keep your secrets, whatever, you
know what? Whatever? Oh my god, why don't you eat
some of that?

Speaker 1 (28:01):
I'm going to take this off the Marquee right now.
You know what, if you're not participating, I.

Speaker 2 (28:05):
Want to take this off the Marquee right now.

Speaker 3 (28:07):
Kane after Dark with producer Brands exactly.

Speaker 2 (28:11):
Oh great, Yeah, your threats mean nothing to me.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
All right, mister talkative? Do you at least have a
double D you report?

Speaker 2 (28:20):
I do. But first of all, oh wait, do you
guys see the video of the girl having that massive
tantrum in your home away from home Walmart? No, No,
there's a lot of videos.

Speaker 1 (28:36):
So it's Black Friday.

Speaker 2 (28:38):
It was yesterday. I believe that this happened. Uh, you guys,
have got to look it up on YouTube and just
google twenty twenty four. Girl throws tantrum in Walmart. There's
not her parents are not around anywhere.

Speaker 1 (28:53):
How old is this girl?

Speaker 2 (28:55):
I think she's eleven, okay. And it starts with her
walking through like the refrigerator part where they have like
the package cheeses and stuff, and she's just grabbing them
and throwing them everywhere, and a woman in a cart says, hey,
you need to stop that. Two women tackle this girl

(29:16):
because it gets horrible. They tackle her and she gets
away and starts throwing wine bottles, glasses, jars of things.
Little Debbie boxes are flying everywhere, and some guy finally
just picks he up and grabs her and takes her
out of the store. Not a parent in sight. So

(29:37):
parent of the year, whoever that is, kang, I just
want to okay.

Speaker 3 (29:42):
So for Eric's segment, he told us that he did
nothing for Thanksgiving, instead gave us a review of a
ten second viral video that happened in a Walmart.

Speaker 2 (29:53):
I didn't leave my house on Thanksgiving?

Speaker 1 (29:56):
Nothing, Okay? That's interesting, Like, did you were you in sweats? Where?
Did you watch? Did you binge watch shows?

Speaker 2 (30:03):
Yes? That's all I did turkey. I mean, come on,
I did. I ordered turkey from uh, what's what's the
wooden enguish?

Speaker 1 (30:14):
I don't even care, you know, I don't know. I
don't care.

Speaker 2 (30:16):
And it was very good.

Speaker 3 (30:17):
We either raise your standard of what's worthy. I can't
because what the latest that's happening at Walmart is not yet.

Speaker 2 (30:25):
I love yank in her chain. I have so yanking
her chain. That's just the best you have to offer.

Speaker 1 (30:32):
It's so ridiculous.

Speaker 2 (30:33):
Move us along. I love Yank in your chaine. Start
talking about something interesting now.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
I want you to bring it.

Speaker 2 (30:42):
Well, I'll bring what's been broughten like there isn't a
whole Oh now he's got sass.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
Okay, you're gonna eat the rest of that jello.

Speaker 2 (30:50):
This is not fucking am not.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
Don't say that around my mom or my father. Please.

Speaker 2 (30:56):
Oh gosh, that's right both. He's trying blinging his plastic.
I know, I really am. Britney Spears's birthday is today.
She's forty three.

Speaker 1 (31:06):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yes, and I guess her voice from Sam is finalized today? Too.
Oh okay, yep.

Speaker 1 (31:15):
Does she have a new boyfriend?

Speaker 2 (31:17):
I don't know if she does or not. I don't
think so. I think she's just twirling around in her.

Speaker 1 (31:20):
House, twirling, twirling, twirling.

Speaker 2 (31:23):
Oh I did do something fun on Friday night. Now,
he remembers, speaking of celebrities, I saw Kathy Griffin. What okay, yeah,
at the Balboa.

Speaker 1 (31:31):
You know what I see? See this what I write down.
It's kind of helpful when you write down what you're
going to talk about on the podcast.

Speaker 2 (31:40):
But hello, or just remember.

Speaker 1 (31:42):
I'm going to wrestle.

Speaker 2 (31:44):
I just remembered that.

Speaker 1 (31:45):
Okay, where was she performing?

Speaker 2 (31:48):
You didn't listen? I said, the Balboa? Hello, downtown.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
I know it was yelling at you.

Speaker 3 (31:51):
Oh wait, wait, you went and saw her perform. Yes, okay,
that's not as cool. I thought you saw her candidly?

Speaker 1 (31:56):
How was it?

Speaker 2 (31:57):
It was very funny?

Speaker 1 (31:59):
Is she? I don't want to say she back because
she was. She kind of went.

Speaker 2 (32:04):
She got canceled. She did big time, got canceled. She
she kind deserved. No, she didn't. I thought I thought
it was hilarious. No, it was way over the line.
I lost. She looked great, and she got an implant
in her throat so her voices back, because you know,
she had lung cancer. Was probably and they took out

(32:25):
a piece of her I think left lung. But when
the surgeon did it, which was hilarious. During her concert,
she says his name full out because she's She's like,
I'm protected under that. So doctor Robert whatever.

Speaker 1 (32:39):
So she outed him.

Speaker 2 (32:40):
Yeah, he like nicked her vocal cord or something happened,
and it she didn't. She sounded like mini mouse for
like three years.

Speaker 1 (32:51):
So she got an implant and it helped.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
Okay, and she told a very funny story about her
and Sea, the singer that you guys saw. Oh yeah,
now I know why she hid on the side of
the stage with the wig and the big bow and
never came out. Why do you know she's autistic?

Speaker 1 (33:11):
That makes sense how I think I may have heard
something along those lines. I did not know that until
a gas She's on the spectrum. Yeah, like bright lights
and things and her genius too.

Speaker 2 (33:24):
Not Kathy Griffin sia, oh.

Speaker 1 (33:28):
No, because see it. It explains her her not liking
the limelight, not wanting to be like her face scene
and doing things too. I love Sea, I love seeing
that show is so good. She's so good.

Speaker 2 (33:46):
I love it. Anyway, Okay, anyway, j Lo gave the
big middle finger to Black Friday, she went on Rodeo
drive and bought an eighty thousand dollars Ermez bag. But
she showed up in Rmez with a Burken bag. Now
you know how expensive those bags are?

Speaker 1 (34:08):
Are they? Okay? So are burkins more expensive than Ermez?

Speaker 2 (34:12):
Burkins? Are Ermez darling?

Speaker 3 (34:15):
Excuse me?

Speaker 1 (34:16):
I didn't know that they're the same thing. Oh, Burkin
is is the kind of purse from Ermaz? Yes, eighty grand.
Do you know who Ben spent Thanksgiving with?

Speaker 2 (34:28):
Jennifer?

Speaker 1 (34:29):
Yep, Jennifer Garner. And I know maybe he's maybe there's
a wee kindling going on there. Who knows.

Speaker 2 (34:37):
Maybe I like it, Mawana. I beat out Wicked. What
domestically made two hundred and twenty one million. Internationally it
made one hundred and sixty five point three.

Speaker 3 (34:51):
You got like kind of mediocre reviews, though I remember correctly.

Speaker 1 (34:55):
Well, here's what it is. Are parents trying to keep
their kids occupied while they're out of school, little kids,
and Wicked is a little bit too intense for the
smaller ones. So I get that. But wow, I bet
the people were at Wicked or the production company was
like oh main, darn it.

Speaker 2 (35:14):
I know. Yeah, Megan Trainer has had so much boatox
allegedly that she can't smile.

Speaker 1 (35:23):
Oh I need botox. I feel like a crumpled paper bag,
and I look like I look like I look like
I'm a man.

Speaker 2 (35:32):
I was wondering where to put that jello now that
you've talked about a crumpled paper bag.

Speaker 1 (35:39):
Oh my god, no, I feel I feel just not.
I don't look cute today. I feel like like a
man in a wig. Do I look a man today?

Speaker 2 (35:49):
Anyways? Sir?

Speaker 1 (35:53):
You know what somebody once told me that, like wrote
a comment I've been getting, you know, through my years,
through my profession, I've received lots of accolades, will say
well nice things, yes, of course, but some mean things
to you. And one of them that's stuck out was
you look like a man. And I was like, I

(36:16):
remember that, and it's stuck with me, and I wonder.

Speaker 2 (36:19):
Do I sometimes let's move on? Would I look like
a man? I'm just kidding. No, you don't look like
a man. I don't think you look like a man.

Speaker 1 (36:28):
That's not what you said about forty minutes ago.

Speaker 3 (36:33):
Okay, what I will rephrase is that let me re emphasize.
Is that what I said was you look like what
a transvestite might think a woman looks like and tries
to emulate. That's more the shirt you chose and the
fact you have extensions. Okay, okay, not your face particularly, Okay,
thank you.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
I just feel like you're like that, you have the
look that someone would try to copy.

Speaker 1 (36:56):
Okay, thank you.

Speaker 2 (36:59):
And you're five o'clock is starting to come. You know what.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
I've started shaving my face.

Speaker 2 (37:04):
Okay, Oh, that's the worst thing you can do. Why
because it grows back twice?

Speaker 1 (37:09):
What am I supposed to do? Get it wax?

Speaker 2 (37:11):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (37:12):
Because little there's little the peach fuzz. I don't like it.

Speaker 2 (37:16):
Do you take a trip to a little cosmetic.

Speaker 1 (37:18):
To get it lasered? Yeah, that's what I should do.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
It's all I needed you coming in looking like me.

Speaker 1 (37:25):
I okay. I was with uh, I won't name which one,
but a boyfriend and we were having this romantic late lunch.

Speaker 2 (37:36):
Yes, oh god, romantic. Didn't you call me from the bathroom?

Speaker 1 (37:41):
Yes? Yes, because it was a nice restaurant in del
mar and it was like the sun was going down
and it was behind me and I felt like I
was cute that day and I felt like I looked
pretty and I was feeling all lovey Debbie. And he
looks at me and he goes, you might wanna wax

(38:07):
your face because there's a hair that's about an inch
long sticking out of your jaw. It was like illuminated
the sun illuminated it. You could see all the hairs.

Speaker 2 (38:18):
In the breeze.

Speaker 1 (38:18):
Oh my god, I don't know, but like, I didn't
need to hear that. So now that traumatized me. So
now I shaved my face in the shower.

Speaker 2 (38:25):
Oh boy, I didn't want to know any of that.

Speaker 1 (38:28):
Well, do what you gotta do. And I'm not the
only one that does that. I'm not the only woman
that does that.

Speaker 2 (38:33):
Please no, I also shave my face, but I do
too anyways, So look at the three of us have
something in common.

Speaker 1 (38:39):
So does Eva Mendez. I heard she did an interview
with She's a Lot.

Speaker 2 (38:43):
Thank you and so sorry. I watched the dumbest movie
on Netflix. Let's hear what it's called a I Oh.

Speaker 1 (38:56):
I started to watch that and I faded out.

Speaker 2 (38:59):
It's called Afraid, But then the AI A Afraid is
like highlight, so stupid, so dumb.

Speaker 1 (39:07):
You know what's good? Is land man? Did I talk
about this last week?

Speaker 2 (39:10):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (39:11):
That is worth watching on Paramount.

Speaker 2 (39:13):
Okay, and then finally another woman has come forward and
said that he did he tried to hang her over
a balcony, allegedly.

Speaker 1 (39:27):
Just to scare her as a.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
Getting weirder.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
He's a bad man.

Speaker 2 (39:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (39:35):
I wonder if any celebrities will come forward and try
to claim victimhood, but specifically so they can try to
get out of things they may have also participated in.

Speaker 1 (39:44):
Though I would think that celebrities are gonna just did
you just hide your yawn?

Speaker 2 (39:53):
Well? I had to sniff too. Anyway, are so bad today?

Speaker 1 (39:58):
Oh? I'm sorry? I think that. I don't know. They
just want to lay low. I think the least there
people are saying, don't say anything at all, don't even
get involved.

Speaker 3 (40:10):
Except Jlo has been all busy lately and she's pretty
closely tied to the case.

Speaker 1 (40:15):
I think she hasn't said anything about it, though.

Speaker 2 (40:18):
She's been in the public quite a bit.

Speaker 3 (40:20):
Though there's like I think there's a video of her
giving a gun that was in like her purse to
Ditty or something.

Speaker 2 (40:26):
I thought I heard that.

Speaker 1 (40:27):
I think that Ben Affleck found out some things about
her in those days when she was with Ditty. Maybe
he saw a video, maybe some things came out and
he was like, hell no, Sia, I don't know. That's
just my difficult that too, that too true, so true. Oh,

(40:51):
by the way, mister connection, celebrity connection this month in
little Italy at the music box. Yes, Dog Star is performing.

(41:12):
It's a Saturday night. Let's make it happen. Pick that
ball back up.

Speaker 2 (41:19):
Already working on it, you are, he said, He says that,
he said that for so many things.

Speaker 1 (41:24):
I kind of believe him though, because I did tell
him this, like yesterday or the day before a like, whoever,
you know, when is he coming? I think it's the
fourteenth or the sixteenth. It's a Saturday.

Speaker 2 (41:35):
That's like two weeks.

Speaker 1 (41:36):
I know. I'm like, we will bring all our equipment,
we will do everything, like we will bring.

Speaker 2 (41:41):
The Make a Wish kid of course, have a Make
a Wish kid?

Speaker 1 (41:45):
Now, remember kids like we think. I mean, I don't
who knows.

Speaker 2 (41:48):
I don't know how we're going to fit a stretcher
in there, but.

Speaker 1 (41:52):
But you got to do it. He's he's so close.
We've got to do it and know it's a Saturday.
He's not gonna be here on a Monday. But still,
so that's something that's going to be on our radar. Okay,
so let's shut this one down so I could take
a breath, and I'm going to put on something I
bought at the thrift store for I think it was

(42:14):
a dollar for our next episode. So get excited.

Speaker 2 (42:19):
I'm already. And oh what else?

Speaker 1 (42:23):
Oh, we also have a spelling bee. I'm going to
give you guys a spelling bee. Who do you think
is the better speller? Because you claim to be a great.

Speaker 2 (42:33):
Spell I am a very good speller, I bet Brian,
I don't know because I don't have to. Like I
think I'm good, but I don't actually have to. That
never gets put to the test because of the electricity.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
And well when you were younger, were you, Yeah, I
was good? But all right, So we're going to do
a little bit of a spelling bee and we have
a new game called Mind in the Gutter.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
Oh I almost spot this.

Speaker 1 (42:57):
It's funny.

Speaker 2 (42:59):
Okay, yeah, I'll spot.

Speaker 1 (43:00):
This, yes, yes, yes, So we have a lot more
coming up, and I'm gonna go take a breath. I'm
gonna go in the closet scream. This is what my
mom used to do when she was super stressed out
and her kid like we were driving her insaying.

Speaker 2 (43:16):
Oh yes, she told me this. Are you going to
go in the closet and scream that you hate us? Oh?

Speaker 1 (43:21):
No, no, no, oh you just go in the closet,
shut the door, scream as loud as you can, let
it out, come back out, and then you're relaxed.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
Are you going to be relaxed?

Speaker 1 (43:32):
Yes? Should I do it right now?

Speaker 2 (43:34):
Yeah? Okay?

Speaker 1 (43:36):
What just to end the show so I can start? Yeah,
I needed I have this like energy that's bothering. Okay,
just go then, okay, just say no, no, no, no,
I'm gonna scream.

Speaker 2 (43:46):
What No, we don't want to hear this? Yeah we do. Great,
let's get this over with. Jesus. I'm just gonna turn
the audio way down. Oh boy, let's see how this is.
Locker in the closet? Does that go? Does that door
have a lot? Are you hungry? I'm hungry. Let's go
get go back in there. Please? Can you put a

(44:08):
chair underneath the handle. You can give us enough time
to make plans to leave. What you're in there. How
do you feel? Not mistake, No mistake. Much more on
edge now.

Speaker 1 (44:21):
Anyway, thank you guys for listening and watching as always,
and love your podcast.

Speaker 2 (44:29):
I love you. Don't be stressed.

Speaker 1 (44:33):
No I'm not. I'm calm now.

Speaker 2 (44:35):
I just had to listen to her scream let's just
cut well, this is the thing. She just looked at
me and said she's calm. And those eyes do not
say you're calm. You actually look a little bit like
Britney Spears right now, Yeah, a little.

Speaker 1 (44:47):
Bit today's Britney Spears.

Speaker 2 (44:49):
Yeside the knives. Oh no, I know. Wow. All right, well,
all right, love your podcast, draw it out.

Speaker 1 (44:58):
I love you, my sweet babies, and I of all
you guys.

Speaker 2 (45:00):
By guys,