December 17, 2024 • 47 mins
This is our second annual Temu Christmas where Erik and Laura dive deep into the dark web of the discount website to find the most hideous things to gift each other. The loser has to wear or display their “gifts” in public. Producer Bryan is the all-important judge of who bought the worst items possible. Watch the holiday horror unfold in this very funny, entertaining, ugly, shocking episode. Who do you think won the Terrible Temu contest? We’d love your input. Get ready for the grossest Christmas gift exchange ever!! And, we sprinkle in a little Double D Showbiz Gossip to add a little fun.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
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Speaker 2 (00:22):
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Speaker 1 (00:50):
Make sure you tell them that Laura Kane after Dark
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Go to glamfam dot com. Hello, Welcome to Laura Kane
after Dark a very special episode. It's our terrible TEAMU
Christmas Gift Exchange second annual and this year we've ramped
(01:13):
it up and this year Brian Oh, by the way,
I'm Laura Kane. This is Eric Rimmer Hi producer. Brian's
behind the bike now, Brian, you we're judging this thing
tonight because the loser has to do the walk of
shame at the bombs up the street wearing whatever the
other person gets the other person and we have to
(01:35):
talk to people on video. Okay, so you we don't
have time for a poll or we don't have time
for our listeners to vote. Can you be impartial? Can
you be not favoring your boy over here?
Speaker 3 (01:50):
I just want in the pre polling, I gave you
a favorable rating.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
I know, and I appreciate that, and I just want
that to continue to be in all fairs. Bless you.
So okay, I'm glad we goout that out of the way. Okay, great,
So that's happening. We have some double D and I
(02:20):
have a little story to talk about first. It's a
Christmas story real quick before we get into the big
Temu gift exchange. But I want to talk about our
new sponsor, Dune Jewelry dot com. Dunejewelry dot com, the
website is a place that you're going to go and
you're going to see this jewelry and you're going to
fall in love it's going to be something that you're
(02:43):
going to buy somebody special who will treasure it forever.
They create jewelry that has special, meaningful memories attached to it.
They have a bank of sands from all over the world.
So if you spent time in can Coon, maybe you've
got maybe you got engaged in can Coon. Oh, they've
(03:04):
got sand from CanCon. You can make a ring out
of it. Now, listen to what my This is what
my family has ordered. Okay, and I'll tell you about
ordering something special at the end. So my mom wants
a beaded cuff oval gold with some of my dad's
ashes in it. My sister wants a Marina bracelet with
(03:28):
abalony mother of pearl with my dad's ashes. They can
like mix them together to make a beautiful It looks
really really pretty. And then my niece wents a stacked
ring with you get to pick four elements for the
stacked ring and they have elements all kinds of elements. Listen,
(03:48):
Rocky mountain dirt because my dad loved the Rocky mountains.
His ashes, dark red rose petals, and beautiful green and
blue sea glass. And the rings has four different spots
for the different element. It is just the coolest website
and it is the most beautiful gift. It comes in
(04:11):
a beautiful gift box like this when it shows who
made it for you, and it comes in a little envelope,
see like Jessica or an o Sarah. Sarah made mine
and I wear it all the time. It's right here anyway,
Dunejewelry dot com. Now, when you're set to order, put
in the promo code Laura Kane fifteen for fifteen percent
(04:34):
off your order. That is a major percentage off. And
we've already heard from done that you guys are calling
and ordering.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
Amazing.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
I'm so excited, amazing. So Laura Kane fifteen, Dunejewelry dot com.
If you've missed any of that, just go to our website.
Laura Kane after dark for sure. I'm super easy. Thank you, Holly,
Thank you, Holly, Thank you, Carol, She's somebody I talked
to you to. Thank you, Jessica, thank you, Sarah, everybody
at Dune Jewelry. Okay, so they did a story about
(05:05):
Christmas songs and the most dangerous Christmas songs to drive to.
Did you know that there are songs that are dangerous
to drive to Christmas wise so, a study found that
songs with over a one hundred and twenty beats per
minute can lead to dangerous driving habits. The worst song
(05:29):
to drive to Christmas song that'll get you all riled
up because it has.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Grandma got run over by a raid.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Dear no, it has one hundred and seventy two beats
per minute and that's way over the one twenty is
a song that my kids laugh at me for because
it makes me so incredibly sad. It makes me want
to cry.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
And here it is, Oh God.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Come on, come on, Frosty.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Work that cannot be one hundred and seventy two beats permanent.
I'm a fact check that I play. I play instruments
that sounds wrong. That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
I would get mad just listening to this.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Yeah, okay. It makes me so sad because he dies
at the end. He basically dies every year, and it's
like I'll be back again someday, and it makes me
so sad. My kids used to laugh so hard, like, Mom,
what is wrong with you? It's Frosty the snowmad. I'm like,
it makes me so sad because he melts.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
I'm gonna side with your kids.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I know, I know, I know.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
So the other one that's dangerous to drive to is
all I want for Christmas? Is You from Mariah Carey?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Well, that would just shatter your windshield.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Yeah, one hundred and fifty minute beats per minute. And
then Realise Navide.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
That's a great song.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yuck, Belie on my dog. Have you heard of that? Okay?
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Anyway?
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Uh and nine beats per minute? And then Santa Claus
is coming to town the Jackson five rendish of it,
and then Happy Christmas War is over John Lennon and Yoko.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Oh no, that's a slow song.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
I know, I don't know. It has one hundred and
forty six beats per minute. That's what it says.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (07:23):
Am I a scrooge that I don't like any of
the songs on this list?
Speaker 3 (07:26):
What's your favorite Christmas song?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Do you like? Let It Snow? Let It Snow?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I like Silent Night and the Whole Holy Night?
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Those are good, they're good, but they're like those are
like this? What about Happy One?
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I love my grown up Christmas list.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Sleigh Ride's my favorite, but the ones without lyrics.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
I like Santa Baby, I.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Like Jess Nuts Roasting, I don't open no fire, but
we used to when I was with the Jump and
Chair Show. We used to come because we said, Jops
nuts roasting.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Is that what it was? Oh?
Speaker 1 (07:56):
I knew it, Jeff's nuts roasting open. Now here's the problem.
We worked at a station that played all Christmas music
from like Thanksgare all right, So we would kind of
get a little flap happy. Yeah, hearing the songs all
the time, so we would make up turney lyrics all amazing.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
It was horrible.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It was horrible. What about Rudolph.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I saw my mommy humping Santa Claus.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
No, I don't know that. No, Uh, I wish it
could be Christmas from Wizard.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Have yourself a merry little Christmas. That's a beautiful song.
I like that one, the Judy Garland one. And then
I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, Santa Claus whatever.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
I never saw that anyway.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Yeah, that would be that would be crazy, even the kissing,
because you saw Santa kissing your mom.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
Well, the joke is it's obvious. Imagine you come downstairs
and your dad's dressed to say to your mom's like,
let's do it right now, or you're.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
A kid and you think it is Santa, and Santa's
kissing romantically your mother. That's not okay.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
In my book, Santa's got game.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I don't know anyway, that's what I have. Oh my gosh,
I'm excited to give the gifts. But we do have
a Double D segment we do to get through because
some things have happened before we get to our big
contest that we've been We've been cooking at each other
for the last couple of weeks about Ruthless. By the way,
Oh stop at me, Oh my god, every time I
(09:31):
talk to him. It's getting old. Just wait. So I'm
glad it's over, but too so cue the Double D
music and let's get down to it. You can turn
my mic up if you want to.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Well, we we all know that vander pump Rules is
not coming back with the old cast.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Right there we go, I'm back on.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Oh are you yes?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
I just heard that.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yes, they are not returning.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
So Sheena's not returning, and and La LA's na returning,
and neither Kennedy.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Speaking of James Kennedy, he was arrested over the weekend
for battery on his girlfriend Ali luber No.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Not Allie, not the cute, little, innocent, beautiful Allie.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
I believe it was Kathy Hilton's Christmas party and he
Bodi slammed her.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
What Yeah, well he must be off the wagon, so.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
He was arrested.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Oh no, that's bad on all Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Well, we know that storyline won't be playing out in
vanderbub browls.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
No, well, no, they're not on it anymore. So have
they recast the show?
Speaker 2 (10:40):
I guess it's going to be a new cast. I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
You don't know when it's airing, or if it's been
shot or anything.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Or even if anybody's been cast yet.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Oh my gosh, I don't know if I like that.
I don't. I think I like my returning characters cast members.
But whatever, Okay, isn't Stossy going to be on something
She's like going to be on?
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Yeah, but I don't remember what it was?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Like an offshoot of like.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
I think it's that vander Pump Villa.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Yes, yes, yes, that's it. That's okay.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Kim Kardashian's Skims has a store now. Oh and she
showed up for the grand opening in that scooter because
she broke her foot.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Oh really, yeah, you know, have you seen that skims.
I don't know if it's a bra, a dress, a
shirt that has built in nips.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
Uh huh, Yeah, that's wild. I mean, well, you don't
eat one of those.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
I don't. I work to cover them up at all costs,
Like I wouldn't want to be walking around with popping
out cold in the studio.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
I don't understand why the whole craze around skims. They're
really that's expensive air.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
It's very expensive. I do have one item from skims,
and it's a long black dress and I have to
tell you that every time. It's just just basic kind
of loungey dress, but it's form fitting and it goes
all the way to my ankle, I mean like almost
to my feet, and I get so many compliments on it.
It's just the materials really nice st it's well made.
But it is very expensive. Yeah yeah, very expensive. But
(12:12):
I do want to I would love a lounge suit,
would you.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Well, maybe there'll be one in your bag. Okay, daddy,
yeah baby?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Why did I say that?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
On my little sugar baby?
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Go back to the scripts.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
Okay, So the last thing I have is this girl,
this girl that was on I believe she was on TikTok.
She slept with a thousand guys in the twenty four
hour period.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
No, no, her.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Name is Lily Phillips and she took on a thousand
dudes in twenty four hours.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
It's not a porn it's not a TikTok chick. It's
a porn star.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Oh is she a porn star?
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Yeah, but it was only one hundred, but she's playing
on doing a thousand. So I heard, Oh god, I
made the cycles on every social media platform.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
It did, and she was exhausted and tired, and I
can't imagine why she.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Looked there was The big thing was there was an
interview afterwards, or well not afterwards. This guy flew out
there just to interview her after she did it, and
she looked traumatized after it. But then she annound she
was gonna do a thousand or something.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
What a what a classy team?
Speaker 1 (13:24):
That would be horrendous.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Well can you imagine being one of the guys too,
Like who's waiting?
Speaker 1 (13:31):
I know one of the hunt there. So there are
a hundred guys out there just fine.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Was doing it like a gross's thing. Do you remember
the Houston five hundred? Do you remember that.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
No, I don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
She was a porn star that did five hundred guys
in literally like a day. And the big drama over
it was that a lot of the guys that were
there were married and their wives found out.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
Well yeah, just like that Ashley Madison documentary.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
Oh that was crazy.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Why have you watched The Girl's Gun Wild one on
Peacock Joe Friend?
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Oh? Is it great? Good? Is it similar?
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Okay, I'm in I need something new to watch. I've
already watched all my ninety days.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
It's like we're kind of in a weird point culturally
where we can't decide if we think like sex is
a sacred thing or not, because on the one hand,
you got people who you know, do one hundred people
once and you're like ugh on. In the other hand,
we don't really treat it much better than that, like
in regular conversation. A lot of times, it's like it's
(14:35):
got like a weird like it. It feels like it's
it'll define how we view it.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Okay, Well let me okay, So let me ask you this.
If I was if I started out twenty twenty five
having like five guys on my roster that I would
go through and just kind of went through like a
slut phase or whatever. Would you see that as really like,
(15:02):
oh god lord, that's just awful, or would you be like, oh,
well whatever.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
I think it depends. Is it like healthy for you
in the sense, like is this like a like a
manifestation of some like issues you're you're trying to work
through and you're just trying to I guess bury it
with no sexuality, or you're just literally just having fun.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
This isn't like a cross addiction thing.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
No, not like an addiction, but just like it's just
like a healthy expression of behavior.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Well, it's just something I've never done before. I've never
had a slut phase, not that I need to have one,
but I'm just recommended.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
I don't know if it'd be like a terrible thing
for you.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
I don't know if I don't think I could do it.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
It's really I guess it's a personal press.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Because it's to me it is a little bit. It
is safe. I mean, it's sacred. You do it with
one person you really really like, and then you don't,
like the next day, do it it's some different dude
or the same day or oh my god.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Or back to back.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
No no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
I mean it's really I guess at this point it's
just everyone's personal preference. That's why there's so much argument
over it. Yeah, but like you know, body count is
like a big contentious topic.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah. Well, I I don't know. In twenty twenty five,
one of our topics for the podcast is going to
be me finding love and we're going to figure it out.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
It's gonna be a short one, real fast.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
So no, I'm being serious about it.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
I'm being serious, all right, I'm I'm working on something
right now.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
You always say that, Well.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
No, this is a good one. So remember remember the
sugar Baby's website.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
Yes, I've heard of it.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Okay, So I'm trying to get somebody on the show
that was on that website. I was written a book about.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
It, okay.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Remember I tried to be on sugar Daddy dot Calm
way back in the day, but I got kicked off. Yeah, guys,
I forgot what I did wrong?
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Too nasty?
Speaker 1 (16:55):
No, I think I was. I was just too clueless.
I didn't know what the heck I was doing. I
don't know, like the rent a friend thing.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Oh god, I.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Know I will never live that down. Never.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Never.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
Okay, So you sign up for weird stuff I do.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I do all in the name of a few extra
bucks and some fun content. But you know what, you're
kind of kind of scary.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Kind of like a prostitute who just doesn't do stuff.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
True.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I do all the other weird stuff, like become a
friend to some lonely guy in bell ball Park for
an hour.
Speaker 3 (17:25):
Yeah fifty that escorting, No.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I didn't. Escorting is when you like, actually have relations.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Well it's it's escorting is not guaranteed. It's just kind
of implied. He probably thought there was an implication.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Well, when he did actually show up at some of
my station events, I got a little worry. Yeah wait
what uh huh Yeah, there was that whole thing. So
I'm like, m this wasn't a good idea.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
He turned out poorly, didn't.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Turn out good, did not turn out good at all.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
It did not.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
That was over.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
That was a long time ago. So anyway, now.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Leave me alone, but be sure listen to our podcast Thursday.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Thay like comment, chair's right, your friends, Okay, now how
do we want to do this. Let's bring up the
Christmas music, because it's time. We've done a lot of crap.
Speaker 3 (18:20):
Talk a lot of it, show me the money.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
And now it's time. And I was annicking yesterday and
today because I lost a crucial gift for you, and
I'm like, what am I gonna do? This is like
one of my This is like the creme de la creme.
And I was I was looking over I couldn't figure
(18:46):
it out. Like my garage is a complete disaster. I'm like,
if it's in there, I'm screwed. There's no way I'm
going to find it. I found it God, just in
time today.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Good for you.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
All right? So do we want to do like one
in one? Do we want to do an? Okay? So
why don't you go first with your first volley?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And I didn't wrap any of your gifts, okay, so
I think I'll just hand them to you with your
eyes closed. You can open them if you want to
do that, sure, Okay, So why don't you start?
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
And uh, here we go.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Well, ladies first.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Okay, so you want me to start thinking?
Speaker 2 (19:24):
You should start? Wait? Is it?
Speaker 3 (19:26):
Are they in bags?
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Yeah? All the presents are in one bag. I'm going
to hand it to them one at a time. We're
not unwrapping them, but but they go.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
I was gonna say, just hand the bag, limp, pull
everything well.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Because each one has a story, kind of has a storyline.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Okay, please, Brian, okay, all right, do you think don't
make her mad?
Speaker 3 (19:45):
I'm deducting points though, Oh my god, stop, don't get
the judge. It's a temptive court.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Brian. Have I told you how handsome and good looking
you looking?
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Tell me already now.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
So this is just a little fun. Okay. I know
you love making baths. That's something you really enjoy. And
so in the bathtub, I'm sure sometimes you shave whatever
part of your body you shave. I'm not sure what
you shave.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
That's definitely est.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
But and then maybe you might use a toothbrush for something.
I don't know. But I decided to get you something
fun that you can like stick on the actual bathtub
so you can hold these things. Oh so close your eyes. Okay,
here you go. I even put something on there for you.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Okay, thank you. There you go.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Their little feet that holds your oh, that holds your razor,
and you stick them to the side of the so
you stick them to the side of the of the
tub or the shower. You can stick your toothbrush in
this one. Wow, So now how much you love feet?
That's this is just a little fun thing.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
That's the most bizarre thing I've ever seen. Thank you,
you're welcome. I will cheer it.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I'm sure you will again. Just the first little fun
thing this is. This is a fun little thing. Yes,
not even close to what's about to happen, just a
starting point. Okay, Now let's see what your first balie is, mister.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Well, okay, I know how much you like to cook. Yeah,
uh huh, so I wanted to get you something, okay,
so that you don't you know.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Okay, okay, oh, an apron. I could always use an apron.
I do a lot of painting too, you know for sure. Yeah, okay,
let's see what this apron. Oh oh hey, that's.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
Just yeah, it's not even terrible. It's just flattery.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I know. I know. I'm going to go out in
my patio where my neighbors can see me.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Yeah, oh yeah, that'll fool them.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
And uh do some painting out there there you go. Okay,
thank you, you're welcome. Hey, you know what this is?
A nice book. First volley too, thank you. We're starting
off light. We're starting off light light.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
Okay, are we getting into the outfits or not yet?
Let's see because I have another volley for you. Okay,
another little volley.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
But it was supposed to come with it's supposed to
go on something. Okay, it's just here okay, and then
read it out loud.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Okay. When this candle is lit, give me that dick.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
You put it on a candle. It's just a sticker.
I love it, and you know that could be your like, hey,
it's time.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
I'm gonna use this.
Speaker 1 (22:56):
Okay, I'm sure you will. Again, another little thing, yes,
before we get into the big stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay, So Laura, yes, I know that your toilet goes
through a lot a lot. It does, it really does.
So I thought this would be perfect for your bathroom.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
I'll hang it above my toilet proper wives prevent racing stripes.
That'll be really fun for all the guests that use
my bathroom for sure, especially our new roommate that we have.
Oh yes, you're gonna love that.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Okay, Now I'd like you to take off your hat,
take your take off your headphones as well, all right,
because this next thing obviously will be a falling on
my head. Okay, uh, say hello to your new friend.
The red mullet. The mullet, and it's red, especially for you.
(24:00):
I had They even had a red one, and I
was so excited. Okay, my god, here, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
This is amazing.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
That's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
That is good. That is good, is good. Here we go, now,
here we go.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
I'm an early lead.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Okay, it's good. It's better than I thought it was good.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Close hold out your hands. Okay, because I too got
you a hair piece, so I.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
Need to take off off off your hat.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Okay, yes, I don't think you need to do this.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Okay, Oh okay, this is really nice. You remember that?
Remember that skit on Saturday Night Live? Pat? I am Pat?
Is this before your time? Brian?
Speaker 3 (24:59):
I know, but everyone knows SNL. I'm just not an
SNL fan.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Do you remember the Pat? They didn't know if she
was a girl or a boy. Maybe I don't know
if that would be appropriate these days, but.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Oh my god, oh my god, look stunning. Thank you stunning.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
Seventies eighties?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Wow, you know what? Some women rocked this look in
the seventies eighties, like this tight perm look really dark hair. Yeah,
well I'll put it on a nicer leg as soon as.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It Honestly, it kind of looks the same. TA can
see your hair and it looks like all those like
big fluffy Russian hats.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Well whatever, this is as good as it's gonna get
right now. Hey wait, we're on the same wavelength the
hair and everything. Wow. Okay, now I really had I
had to buy four different ones of these because I
I could decide which one was best. The first one
(25:59):
is just kind of for you. This isn't gonna be
something you're gonna wear in Vonn's. This is just something
I thought you'd think would be. Okay, here's the first one. Okay,
there you go. It's a T shirt.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Oh actually, I think can.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I say that please tongue punch my fart box? Oh yeah,
see you like that? See that you would wear that?
Speaker 2 (26:26):
I may wear this okay tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
So this is just that's just something funny. Okay, thank you,
We move on. We move on. Can I to the
next one?
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Okay? Is is this just a fun thing to know?
Speaker 1 (26:40):
This one? This one you're probably not gonna want to
wear in public?
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Oh? Are you kidding. I'm totally gonna wear this.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Oh you're not gonna wear that. Please don't talk to me.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
I have crabs for sure, I am you might be
wearing it in vons later.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Oh my god, kidding?
Speaker 1 (27:00):
This is that's just the number two. There's four. Okay,
welcome to your probably. I think this might be the
one you're gonna wear.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Oh I love this?
Speaker 1 (27:19):
You love it?
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Wait? Is this all you got? Kane? No?
Speaker 1 (27:22):
God no, I'm not a good wiper. And it has
a toilet okay. And then finally this one, he's the
one I want you to wear.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Okay, Oh my god, this is amazing vegetarian because I
know how much I love.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Vegetoh god, the Hillcrest really respond to that?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, I'm okay.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
All right, So there's your topk see, it didn't go
too crazy to make you wear something like but you
know you got to pick from crabs. I'm not a
good wiper or vegetarian vegetarian Okay, okay, all.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Right, Okay, I know how much you love crowns.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Okay, mm hmm. Should I just stick it on before
I look at it?
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Sure? Let me put it on.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Okay, Okay, it was my pretty little wig. I do
love crowns. I do feel like Okay, ready, here we go. Okay,
you gotta fix it his lights. I heard something switch on.
So it is a.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
It's a little mouse mouse, a little ratitituwy with a
chess hat. Okay, it's got little clips in his little
mouse paws and he it holds up your hair.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Okay, yeah, okay, well you know what, I actually look
like somebody that would be in my neighborhood once. I
actually look like.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
That's why this is perfect. So okay, okay, close your eyes. Okay, okay,
so this is Oh I got t shirt too? Okay yep,
simply says blow me. Okay, all right, I actually like this.
(29:21):
I may cut it into like more of a crappy
looking shirt.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
You can wear that, I think, so, I think so okay,
now are you ready?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Wait?
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Oh no, you're right, you're still going close your eyes. Okay.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
You know, with with that, I figured you probably don't
want to just wear a shirt, and you should wear
some pants.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Yes, these seem comfortable. Okay me, before I open my eyes?
Speaker 3 (29:59):
Is that a function?
Speaker 2 (30:00):
No pocket up front?
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Or is that just.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
My dogs are gonna love?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh boy, you little you know how it is how
elephants and mice have been is thing. Oh you know
you can't you can't close your eyes, okay, because we
have to complete this outfit. Okay, so hold out your hands.
I don't want you to have to go barefooted.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
No god, no, no, oh my god. These are.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Right now.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
You're awful.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
But they've got like the little bumps on the bottom
or like they're fabulous. You look great.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Okay, now it's your turn. Okay, Now, these aren't something.
This is not what I want you to wear when
we go to Vond's. Okay, this is just for you
to lounge around or actually go to. You can actually
probably just bounce to t J Max if you want
(31:13):
to and the Okay, so here you go. They're nice
and comfy. Open it up.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Oh my god, in the.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
Front of the back, so you'll always have me with you.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
Because I'll have VPL and these for sure right at
your mouth. But you have like this, Oh, but that's.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
Not what I want you to wear. This goes underneath
what I want you to wear, kind of what I'm
wearing right now, but black. Okay, Now, I.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Don't think these came from.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
They did, oh guy, qualification.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
But I know you needed some coverings because you're gonna
be cold.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Allow it, okay, Okay, well I think there's a disqualification here.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Now I'll allow it there for your own benefit.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Just okay. Oh, I forgot to give you this thing. Okay,
what before you go out, before you be the final
piece of the outfit, I bought you something that you
can spare on yourself so you have a scent when
you walk in. Oh.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Okay, there you go. Okay, Oh, stinky ass fart bomb.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Yeah, it's stinky fart bomb spray. So that's gonna be
your cologne that you're gonna spray on before you go
into Bonds.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
This.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Oh god, don't wait, did you open it yet? Oh god,
I don't know this. This came out. I don't smell
it smells like ass apparently. Oh god, I don't know.
You smell it.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
I can't smell like anything.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
We'll spray it.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
I'm not gonna do it right now. Okay, I don't
want to throw up.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
You've got to spray it on yourself though before Okay.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
Now, that's part of the Holes package, part of the package,
part of the Bonds walk through.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Okay, now, Eric I had.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Two choices for your bottoms. Those are just your loungers,
I see. Okay, now you could either wear a.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
These okay, oh wow, these are and that will show
VPL like nobody's business.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
But you have a T shirt so that it could
be a big problem. But what I really think you
should wear are these.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
Okay, yeah, no, yes, that's why I got you the
fish nets.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Flip it around, flip it around.
Speaker 1 (34:12):
They are Geane. Yes, you can wear They're like Jeane
iper O Jean diaper.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
There is a concern though, because I know he's not
wearing underwear yet that won't hide anything.
Speaker 1 (34:23):
That's why I got you the fish that will hold
it in place.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Have you met me?
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Okay, so now here's what we're gonna do. And you
know what I also for just for wolves and fun.
Huh long black gloves.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Uh okay.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Now these did not come.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
I know, but I wanted to complete the outfit. This
is just this is just yeah. I want to keep
you warm.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
I think that there should be a couple of points
taken off.
Speaker 3 (34:59):
I think that these will keep I think this is
a safety thing.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
These are to keep Brian, Thank you, Brian.
Speaker 3 (35:05):
Wow, Brian feeling honestly, those are not those are not
gonna be like the tie breakers though.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Okay, let's who should put on the full outfit first.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I'm not done. Oh okay, Oh no, miss Kane, continue,
I still have things for you.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Okay, I have a full outfit already though.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
Oh yeah, I wanted you to be able to change.
You know, you like to have those wardrobe changes. So
oh no, I'm not even near dead.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
No, all right, rap rapid fire, yeah, okay, here we go. Okay,
so I figured, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
We'll start with yes.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
Okay, so, oh hey, well I can't put them over
my little ratituy, I I don't mind this too much. Okay, great,
thank you, I like the little rat better.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
And then close your eyes. Okay, you're gonna need something
to go with this other outfit, so okay, I thought
you might need some fancy ear rings.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
Okay, I can't even tell what these are, but oh
my god, tampons.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
They're bloody pads that I don't think Eric knows what
tampa he doesn't, no, he doesn't. I mean they're ew
ew ew e.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
No one know. Nobody would even know what these are.
They probably would just think that they're cute. That's gross,
but I know it's gross when you know what they are. Okay,
ew but thank you? Okay, that goes all. Just put
them on right now.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Yeah for sure, okay, okay. And then I figured, oh
are you oh lovely? Look great?
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Thank you? Perfect, I'm all in.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Okay, do you know what these are?
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Oh? Yes, it's a bloody pad. Yeah, yeah, I know.
Don't Yeah, poor Marie has no voice so she can't. Yes,
my roommate is not feeling well, so don't do this.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Then I thought, you know, in case you need to
like run your hands through your hair or anything like that.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Okay, are your eyes closed? Yes they are.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
You might also, because you're probably gonna be cold, you
might need some gloves.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
These are like Lady Gogach type of situation going on. Yes, absolutely,
I kind of like these. These are witchy and like fun. Yeah,
I'm going to get you my pretty. I'm going to
get you my pretty. They have these long nails attached
to the black. Oh look we got each other gloves.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Oh lot, we are so simpatico.
Speaker 1 (37:58):
Look yes, yes gloves, yes closure.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
Okay, Oh jeez, you also have a lovely talk that
you can wear.
Speaker 1 (38:13):
Oh. Another top. Oh it's another shirt. Okay, are you
kidding me? Are you even kidding me? We both got
please tongue pune my part batch all right, Oh god,
I will not be wearing this.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
I will not, Yes, you will so yes, So once again,
I don't want you to just go pantsless.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Okay, I even have these great pants.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
Oh yeah, no, but you.
Speaker 1 (38:45):
Know, okay, okay, Wow, I have so many choices, you
really do. Okay, these look like oh my, like they
have a little daisies. They're like leggings, are light blue
with like pink belt and little daisies in the yellow pockets.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
Oh boil yea.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Every woman when there is decked out lovely look fly
you're going to need some accessories.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
Besides the bloody pads. Oh my god, Oh this feels significant. Yes.
Oh it's a purse. It's a popcorn a popcorn a
bucket purse.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yes, I kind of. Now it's fun.
Speaker 1 (39:39):
I can wear it to the movie.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
Oh, totally fill up with now if you open it.
There's also some surprises, and when that happens, Yes, what
is Christmas without surprises? So these you can put on
your credit.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Card, they say, help me, I'm poor. Thanks a lot.
There's stickers, a card sticker.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
They go on your credit card. Yes, this is for
your car.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Ask me about my explosive diarrhea.
Speaker 2 (40:11):
Thank you, welcome. And then this you can put on
your computer. It says here, let me open that for you,
miss King.
Speaker 1 (40:20):
That's my computer. This is for my car. This is
for my cards. Yes, okay, it's a guy's face. Just
ask mcfucking had it. Just about mcfucking had it.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
Okay, that's the McDonald's clown. Okay, Ronald McDonald.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
So there you want to say the ford like really
is super loud like that, but I just did. Hey,
I had to read what was in front.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Now I've saved the best for last. Well, you know
how much I love you.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
You were not kidding around this time. There's something else
in here.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
Oh you'r change purse.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
Oh this is cute.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
I like it.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
Actually a little polaroid, like an old school polaroid. It's
for change or it could be for like my aarpods
or something. Yeah, okay, exactly, thank you. That's so sweet.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
All right, sweet this crap in there? Okay, Now I
expect to see that bumper sticker on your car. Tomarle, Okay,
I'll come looking. Oh, Marie, you might want to stick
around for this.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Oh she's sick, leave her alone.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
Oh, she's gonna want to stick around for this. So
you know how much I love you?
Speaker 1 (41:25):
Yes, so obviously I can tell ye. So okay, I'm
not looking.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
With this outfit. I got you a little.
Speaker 1 (41:40):
Another another cap. Oh, it says crop duster and it
has a little pin on it that says I pooped today?
Speaker 2 (41:51):
Right, wow, exactly.
Speaker 1 (41:52):
That is just so special? So special?
Speaker 2 (41:56):
Yeah for sure?
Speaker 1 (41:56):
So is that it?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
No? God, So you know you're gonna need accessories to
go with that. I mean, you know it is Christmas.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Oh. They're Taco Bell earrings with a Taco Bell like logo,
and it says I ship I ship myself.
Speaker 2 (42:17):
I know how much you like Taco Bell. I love
talking you do? Yes, yes, see how much what you're saying?
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I know you?
Speaker 2 (42:26):
And then you know me so well I do? And
then close your eyes Okay, oh my god, so you
know to keep the sun out of your eyes.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
Oh that's something you have not given me this year.
So I just put them on without looking. Yeah, okay,
here we go.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
They're remarkably normal.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
What's wrong with these.
Speaker 3 (42:48):
Heart shaped sunglasses.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
These are cute. Yeah, well I can wear these at night.
Speaker 3 (42:54):
It makes how many items do you have?
Speaker 2 (42:56):
Just a couple? Just a couple, next, next day?
Speaker 3 (43:00):
The limit.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
Okay, So once again another shirt.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
This one says oh really, no really, okay, it says,
may I suggest the roast beef with a finger pointing
down to my crop? Now that is disgusting, Eric, that
is discussed.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
Well, this is the outpha that you will be wearing
it too much?
Speaker 1 (43:31):
Oh no, so.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Close your eyes.
Speaker 5 (43:38):
Okay, okay, okay, this is oh some undies.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
Yes, look we did the same kind of thing. It's
Eric's face. You're wearing like a he's wearing like a
Oh you were in your little yes, and it has
I'll wear these. I will wear the heck out of
these because your face.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
All over you wanted me to see your vagina, So
now my little face will be pressed for.
Speaker 5 (44:13):
And then okay, this has got to be the last one.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Okay, all right, all right, So I can't just have
you go in those no and that shirt?
Speaker 1 (44:25):
No, so oh no more pants geez.
Speaker 2 (44:29):
So I figure you'll need to put something over those.
Speaker 1 (44:32):
Okay pants, Oh my god, these look like what are
these called? Uh like? There their sheer, but like Little
House on the Prairie used to wear them like they're
like they're pinafores, pedal pushers, like.
Speaker 2 (44:51):
Leg a little and look where's my face?
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Oh? I have weight. I can't walk into Vonds wearing
just well, you'll be wearing Wait, who says I'm losing? Okay,
now I have almost all my things on? What are
we at this point? Okay, here's here's what we can do.
(45:17):
Either Eric can put on his outfit or you can
imagine him with his outfit on. We'll just take pictures
after and post those. Or he goes and changes into
his outfit right now. Spect the shorts and uh the shirt. Brian,
you make the call. What do you think before you
make the final call about who won the Terrible Team
(45:38):
who contest?
Speaker 3 (45:39):
I think what we should do is we should leave
a little bit suspense. Okay, we'll end here. I'll push
the results at the beginning of the next show with
you guys dressed up.
Speaker 1 (45:47):
With the walk through.
Speaker 3 (45:50):
The walk through.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
I love this idea, and you know what you guys, Please,
if you will, why don't you comment let us know
you think who won this? I mean, even though Eric
brought way more stuff than I did. That doesn't necessarily
mean he won, right, right, right, right blinds not saying comment.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
Okay, I already suspect who I think I know the
winner will be. But it depends on I guess what
outfit combination we see? Okay, you guys have to decide
which combination ends up being worn by each person.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
Okay, so next oh so next episode will the person
be wearing the outfit on the show? Gotcha?
Speaker 3 (46:33):
Okay, there we go.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
So you're gonna have stay tuned to Thursday's show. Thank
you for watching tonight. Good job Eric, and you're rocking
that mullet. You look great.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
You look certifiable.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
I do mind?
Speaker 3 (46:46):
Do you look like a Disney movie villain from the
late nineties?
Speaker 1 (46:50):
I know, yeah, looks like a ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
You're gonna scare somebody people in Vonds coll but in Hillcrest.
Speaker 1 (46:58):
Okay, anyway, thank you guys so much for watching. And
uh yeah, our last show of the year is gonna
be on Thursday. We have a lot to say and
a lot to do besides this, so make sure you
stick around. Thank you doing jewelry. Thank you Ljoia Cosmetic.
Love you so much. And thanks for watching. Love your podcast,
Love your podcast, Bye bye,
La Joya Cosmetic Surgery Center is the place to go
if you're looking to rejuvenate your appearance, tighten and shape
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Make sure you tell them that Laura Kane after Dark
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Go to glamfam dot com. Hello, Welcome to Laura Kane
after Dark a very special episode. It's our terrible TEAMU
Christmas Gift Exchange second annual and this year we've ramped
(01:13):
it up and this year Brian Oh, by the way,
I'm Laura Kane. This is Eric Rimmer Hi producer. Brian's
behind the bike now, Brian, you we're judging this thing
tonight because the loser has to do the walk of
shame at the bombs up the street wearing whatever the
other person gets the other person and we have to
(01:35):
talk to people on video. Okay, so you we don't
have time for a poll or we don't have time
for our listeners to vote. Can you be impartial? Can
you be not favoring your boy over here?
Speaker 3 (01:50):
I just want in the pre polling, I gave you
a favorable rating.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
I know, and I appreciate that, and I just want
that to continue to be in all fairs. Bless you.
So okay, I'm glad we goout that out of the way. Okay, great,
So that's happening. We have some double D and I
(02:20):
have a little story to talk about first. It's a
Christmas story real quick before we get into the big
Temu gift exchange. But I want to talk about our
new sponsor, Dune Jewelry dot com. Dunejewelry dot com, the
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(02:43):
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They create jewelry that has special, meaningful memories attached to it.
They have a bank of sands from all over the world.
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(03:04):
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(03:28):
abalony mother of pearl with my dad's ashes. They can
like mix them together to make a beautiful It looks
really really pretty. And then my niece wents a stacked
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stacked ring and they have elements all kinds of elements. Listen,
(03:48):
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His ashes, dark red rose petals, and beautiful green and
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for the different element. It is just the coolest website
and it is the most beautiful gift. It comes in
(04:11):
a beautiful gift box like this when it shows who
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see like Jessica or an o Sarah. Sarah made mine
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(04:34):
off your order. That is a major percentage off. And
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Speaker 2 (04:43):
Amazing.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
I'm so excited, amazing. So Laura Kane fifteen, Dunejewelry dot com.
If you've missed any of that, just go to our website.
Laura Kane after dark for sure. I'm super easy. Thank you, Holly,
Thank you, Holly, Thank you, Carol, She's somebody I talked
to you to. Thank you, Jessica, thank you, Sarah, everybody
at Dune Jewelry. Okay, so they did a story about
(05:05):
Christmas songs and the most dangerous Christmas songs to drive to.
Did you know that there are songs that are dangerous
to drive to Christmas wise so, a study found that
songs with over a one hundred and twenty beats per
minute can lead to dangerous driving habits. The worst song
(05:29):
to drive to Christmas song that'll get you all riled
up because it has.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
Grandma got run over by a raid.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Dear no, it has one hundred and seventy two beats
per minute and that's way over the one twenty is
a song that my kids laugh at me for because
it makes me so incredibly sad. It makes me want
to cry.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
And here it is, Oh God.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Come on, come on, Frosty.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Work that cannot be one hundred and seventy two beats permanent.
I'm a fact check that I play. I play instruments
that sounds wrong. That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
I would get mad just listening to this.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Yeah, okay. It makes me so sad because he dies
at the end. He basically dies every year, and it's
like I'll be back again someday, and it makes me
so sad. My kids used to laugh so hard, like, Mom,
what is wrong with you? It's Frosty the snowmad. I'm like,
it makes me so sad because he melts.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
I'm gonna side with your kids.
Speaker 1 (06:46):
I know, I know, I know.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
So the other one that's dangerous to drive to is
all I want for Christmas? Is You from Mariah Carey?
Speaker 2 (06:54):
Well, that would just shatter your windshield.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Yeah, one hundred and fifty minute beats per minute. And
then Realise Navide.
Speaker 3 (07:01):
That's a great song.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
Yuck, Belie on my dog. Have you heard of that? Okay?
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Anyway?
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Uh and nine beats per minute? And then Santa Claus
is coming to town the Jackson five rendish of it,
and then Happy Christmas War is over John Lennon and Yoko.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Oh no, that's a slow song.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
I know, I don't know. It has one hundred and
forty six beats per minute. That's what it says.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (07:23):
Am I a scrooge that I don't like any of
the songs on this list?
Speaker 3 (07:26):
What's your favorite Christmas song?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Do you like? Let It Snow? Let It Snow?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I like Silent Night and the Whole Holy Night?
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Those are good, they're good, but they're like those are
like this? What about Happy One?
Speaker 2 (07:36):
I love my grown up Christmas list.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Sleigh Ride's my favorite, but the ones without lyrics.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
I like Santa Baby, I.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Like Jess Nuts Roasting, I don't open no fire, but
we used to when I was with the Jump and
Chair Show. We used to come because we said, Jops
nuts roasting.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Is that what it was? Oh?
Speaker 1 (07:56):
I knew it, Jeff's nuts roasting open. Now here's the problem.
We worked at a station that played all Christmas music
from like Thanksgare all right, So we would kind of
get a little flap happy. Yeah, hearing the songs all
the time, so we would make up turney lyrics all amazing.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
It was horrible.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It was horrible. What about Rudolph.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
I saw my mommy humping Santa Claus.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
No, I don't know that. No, Uh, I wish it
could be Christmas from Wizard.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Have yourself a merry little Christmas. That's a beautiful song.
I like that one, the Judy Garland one. And then
I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, Santa Claus whatever.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
I never saw that anyway.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Yeah, that would be that would be crazy, even the kissing,
because you saw Santa kissing your mom.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
Well, the joke is it's obvious. Imagine you come downstairs
and your dad's dressed to say to your mom's like,
let's do it right now, or you're.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
A kid and you think it is Santa, and Santa's
kissing romantically your mother. That's not okay.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
In my book, Santa's got game.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I don't know anyway, that's what I have. Oh my gosh,
I'm excited to give the gifts. But we do have
a Double D segment we do to get through because
some things have happened before we get to our big
contest that we've been We've been cooking at each other
for the last couple of weeks about Ruthless. By the way,
Oh stop at me, Oh my god, every time I
(09:31):
talk to him. It's getting old. Just wait. So I'm
glad it's over, but too so cue the Double D
music and let's get down to it. You can turn
my mic up if you want to.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Well, we we all know that vander pump Rules is
not coming back with the old cast.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Right there we go, I'm back on.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
Oh are you yes?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
I just heard that.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Yes, they are not returning.
Speaker 1 (09:57):
So Sheena's not returning, and and La LA's na returning,
and neither Kennedy.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Speaking of James Kennedy, he was arrested over the weekend
for battery on his girlfriend Ali luber No.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Not Allie, not the cute, little, innocent, beautiful Allie.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
I believe it was Kathy Hilton's Christmas party and he
Bodi slammed her.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
What Yeah, well he must be off the wagon, so.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
He was arrested.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Oh no, that's bad on all Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Well, we know that storyline won't be playing out in
vanderbub browls.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
No, well, no, they're not on it anymore. So have
they recast the show?
Speaker 2 (10:40):
I guess it's going to be a new cast. I
don't know.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
You don't know when it's airing, or if it's been
shot or anything.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Or even if anybody's been cast yet.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
Oh my gosh, I don't know if I like that.
I don't. I think I like my returning characters cast members.
But whatever, Okay, isn't Stossy going to be on something
She's like going to be on?
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Yeah, but I don't remember what it was?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Like an offshoot of like.
Speaker 2 (11:04):
I think it's that vander Pump Villa.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Yes, yes, yes, that's it. That's okay.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Kim Kardashian's Skims has a store now. Oh and she
showed up for the grand opening in that scooter because
she broke her foot.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Oh really, yeah, you know, have you seen that skims.
I don't know if it's a bra, a dress, a
shirt that has built in nips.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
Uh huh, Yeah, that's wild. I mean, well, you don't
eat one of those.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
I don't. I work to cover them up at all costs,
Like I wouldn't want to be walking around with popping
out cold in the studio.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
I don't understand why the whole craze around skims. They're
really that's expensive air.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
It's very expensive. I do have one item from skims,
and it's a long black dress and I have to
tell you that every time. It's just just basic kind
of loungey dress, but it's form fitting and it goes
all the way to my ankle, I mean like almost
to my feet, and I get so many compliments on it.
It's just the materials really nice st it's well made.
But it is very expensive. Yeah yeah, very expensive. But
(12:12):
I do want to I would love a lounge suit,
would you.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Well, maybe there'll be one in your bag. Okay, daddy,
yeah baby?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
Why did I say that?
Speaker 2 (12:26):
On my little sugar baby?
Speaker 3 (12:28):
Go back to the scripts.
Speaker 2 (12:30):
Okay, So the last thing I have is this girl,
this girl that was on I believe she was on TikTok.
She slept with a thousand guys in the twenty four
hour period.
Speaker 3 (12:46):
No, no, her.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
Name is Lily Phillips and she took on a thousand
dudes in twenty four hours.
Speaker 3 (12:53):
It's not a porn it's not a TikTok chick. It's
a porn star.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Oh is she a porn star?
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Yeah, but it was only one hundred, but she's playing
on doing a thousand. So I heard, Oh god, I
made the cycles on every social media platform.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
It did, and she was exhausted and tired, and I
can't imagine why she.
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Looked there was The big thing was there was an
interview afterwards, or well not afterwards. This guy flew out
there just to interview her after she did it, and
she looked traumatized after it. But then she annound she
was gonna do a thousand or something.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
What a what a classy team?
Speaker 1 (13:24):
That would be horrendous.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Well can you imagine being one of the guys too,
Like who's waiting?
Speaker 1 (13:31):
I know one of the hunt there. So there are
a hundred guys out there just fine.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Was doing it like a gross's thing. Do you remember
the Houston five hundred? Do you remember that.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
No, I don't know what that is.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
She was a porn star that did five hundred guys
in literally like a day. And the big drama over
it was that a lot of the guys that were
there were married and their wives found out.
Speaker 1 (13:57):
Well yeah, just like that Ashley Madison documentary.
Speaker 3 (14:00):
Oh that was crazy.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Why have you watched The Girl's Gun Wild one on
Peacock Joe Friend?
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Oh? Is it great? Good? Is it similar?
Speaker 2 (14:10):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (14:10):
Okay, I'm in I need something new to watch. I've
already watched all my ninety days.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
It's like we're kind of in a weird point culturally
where we can't decide if we think like sex is
a sacred thing or not, because on the one hand,
you got people who you know, do one hundred people
once and you're like ugh on. In the other hand,
we don't really treat it much better than that, like
in regular conversation. A lot of times, it's like it's
(14:35):
got like a weird like it. It feels like it's
it'll define how we view it.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Okay, Well let me okay, So let me ask you this.
If I was if I started out twenty twenty five
having like five guys on my roster that I would
go through and just kind of went through like a
slut phase or whatever. Would you see that as really like,
(15:02):
oh god lord, that's just awful, or would you be like, oh,
well whatever.
Speaker 3 (15:06):
I think it depends. Is it like healthy for you
in the sense, like is this like a like a
manifestation of some like issues you're you're trying to work
through and you're just trying to I guess bury it
with no sexuality, or you're just literally just having fun.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
This isn't like a cross addiction thing.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
No, not like an addiction, but just like it's just
like a healthy expression of behavior.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Well, it's just something I've never done before. I've never
had a slut phase, not that I need to have one,
but I'm just recommended.
Speaker 3 (15:33):
I don't know if it'd be like a terrible thing
for you.
Speaker 1 (15:36):
I don't know if I don't think I could do it.
Speaker 3 (15:37):
It's really I guess it's a personal press.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Because it's to me it is a little bit. It
is safe. I mean, it's sacred. You do it with
one person you really really like, and then you don't,
like the next day, do it it's some different dude
or the same day or oh my god.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Or back to back.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
No no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
I mean it's really I guess at this point it's
just everyone's personal preference. That's why there's so much argument
over it. Yeah, but like you know, body count is
like a big contentious topic.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah. Well, I I don't know. In twenty twenty five,
one of our topics for the podcast is going to
be me finding love and we're going to figure it out.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
It's gonna be a short one, real fast.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
So no, I'm being serious about it.
Speaker 2 (16:23):
I'm being serious, all right, I'm I'm working on something
right now.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
You always say that, Well.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
No, this is a good one. So remember remember the
sugar Baby's website.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
Yes, I've heard of it.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Okay, So I'm trying to get somebody on the show
that was on that website. I was written a book about.
Speaker 1 (16:45):
It, okay.
Speaker 2 (16:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Remember I tried to be on sugar Daddy dot Calm
way back in the day, but I got kicked off. Yeah, guys,
I forgot what I did wrong?
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Too nasty?
Speaker 1 (16:55):
No, I think I was. I was just too clueless.
I didn't know what the heck I was doing. I
don't know, like the rent a friend thing.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Oh god, I.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Know I will never live that down. Never.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Never.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
Okay, So you sign up for weird stuff I do.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
I do all in the name of a few extra
bucks and some fun content. But you know what, you're
kind of kind of scary.
Speaker 3 (17:16):
Kind of like a prostitute who just doesn't do stuff.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
True.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
I do all the other weird stuff, like become a
friend to some lonely guy in bell ball Park for
an hour.
Speaker 3 (17:25):
Yeah fifty that escorting, No.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I didn't. Escorting is when you like, actually have relations.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Well it's it's escorting is not guaranteed. It's just kind
of implied. He probably thought there was an implication.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Well, when he did actually show up at some of
my station events, I got a little worry. Yeah wait
what uh huh Yeah, there was that whole thing. So
I'm like, m this wasn't a good idea.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
He turned out poorly, didn't.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Turn out good, did not turn out good at all.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
It did not.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
That was over.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
That was a long time ago. So anyway, now.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
Leave me alone, but be sure listen to our podcast Thursday.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Thay like comment, chair's right, your friends, Okay, now how
do we want to do this. Let's bring up the
Christmas music, because it's time. We've done a lot of crap.
Speaker 3 (18:20):
Talk a lot of it, show me the money.
Speaker 1 (18:24):
And now it's time. And I was annicking yesterday and
today because I lost a crucial gift for you, and
I'm like, what am I gonna do? This is like
one of my This is like the creme de la creme.
And I was I was looking over I couldn't figure
(18:46):
it out. Like my garage is a complete disaster. I'm like,
if it's in there, I'm screwed. There's no way I'm
going to find it. I found it God, just in
time today.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Good for you.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
All right? So do we want to do like one
in one? Do we want to do an? Okay? So
why don't you go first with your first volley?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:07):
And I didn't wrap any of your gifts, okay, so
I think I'll just hand them to you with your
eyes closed. You can open them if you want to
do that, sure, Okay, So why don't you start?
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (19:18):
And uh, here we go.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Well, ladies first.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Okay, so you want me to start thinking?
Speaker 2 (19:24):
You should start? Wait? Is it?
Speaker 3 (19:26):
Are they in bags?
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Yeah? All the presents are in one bag. I'm going
to hand it to them one at a time. We're
not unwrapping them, but but they go.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
I was gonna say, just hand the bag, limp, pull
everything well.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
Because each one has a story, kind of has a storyline.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
Okay, please, Brian, okay, all right, do you think don't
make her mad?
Speaker 3 (19:45):
I'm deducting points though, Oh my god, stop, don't get
the judge. It's a temptive court.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Brian. Have I told you how handsome and good looking
you looking?
Speaker 3 (19:55):
Tell me already now.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
So this is just a little fun. Okay. I know
you love making baths. That's something you really enjoy. And
so in the bathtub, I'm sure sometimes you shave whatever
part of your body you shave. I'm not sure what
you shave.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
That's definitely est.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
But and then maybe you might use a toothbrush for something.
I don't know. But I decided to get you something
fun that you can like stick on the actual bathtub
so you can hold these things. Oh so close your eyes. Okay,
here you go. I even put something on there for you.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Okay, thank you. There you go.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Their little feet that holds your oh, that holds your razor,
and you stick them to the side of the so
you stick them to the side of the of the
tub or the shower. You can stick your toothbrush in
this one. Wow, So now how much you love feet?
That's this is just a little fun thing.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
That's the most bizarre thing I've ever seen. Thank you,
you're welcome. I will cheer it.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I'm sure you will again. Just the first little fun
thing this is. This is a fun little thing. Yes,
not even close to what's about to happen, just a
starting point. Okay, Now let's see what your first balie is, mister.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Well, okay, I know how much you like to cook. Yeah,
uh huh, so I wanted to get you something, okay,
so that you don't you know.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Okay, okay, oh, an apron. I could always use an apron.
I do a lot of painting too, you know for sure. Yeah, okay,
let's see what this apron. Oh oh hey, that's.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
Just yeah, it's not even terrible. It's just flattery.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
I know. I know. I'm going to go out in
my patio where my neighbors can see me.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
Yeah, oh yeah, that'll fool them.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
And uh do some painting out there there you go. Okay,
thank you, you're welcome. Hey, you know what this is?
A nice book. First volley too, thank you. We're starting
off light. We're starting off light light.
Speaker 2 (22:17):
Okay, are we getting into the outfits or not yet?
Let's see because I have another volley for you. Okay,
another little volley.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
But it was supposed to come with it's supposed to
go on something. Okay, it's just here okay, and then
read it out loud.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
Okay. When this candle is lit, give me that dick.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
You put it on a candle. It's just a sticker.
I love it, and you know that could be your like, hey,
it's time.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
I'm gonna use this.
Speaker 1 (22:56):
Okay, I'm sure you will. Again, another little thing, yes,
before we get into the big stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Okay, So Laura, yes, I know that your toilet goes
through a lot a lot. It does, it really does.
So I thought this would be perfect for your bathroom.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
I'll hang it above my toilet proper wives prevent racing stripes.
That'll be really fun for all the guests that use
my bathroom for sure, especially our new roommate that we have.
Oh yes, you're gonna love that.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Okay, Now I'd like you to take off your hat,
take your take off your headphones as well, all right,
because this next thing obviously will be a falling on
my head. Okay, uh, say hello to your new friend.
The red mullet. The mullet, and it's red, especially for you.
(24:00):
I had They even had a red one, and I
was so excited. Okay, my god, here, oh my god.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
This is amazing.
Speaker 3 (24:09):
That's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
That is good. That is good, is good. Here we go, now,
here we go.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
I'm an early lead.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Okay, it's good. It's better than I thought it was good.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Close hold out your hands. Okay, because I too got
you a hair piece, so I.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
Need to take off off off your hat.
Speaker 3 (24:42):
Okay, yes, I don't think you need to do this.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
Okay, Oh okay, this is really nice. You remember that?
Remember that skit on Saturday Night Live? Pat? I am Pat?
Is this before your time? Brian?
Speaker 3 (24:59):
I know, but everyone knows SNL. I'm just not an
SNL fan.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Do you remember the Pat? They didn't know if she
was a girl or a boy. Maybe I don't know
if that would be appropriate these days, but.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
Oh my god, oh my god, look stunning. Thank you stunning.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
Seventies eighties?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
Wow, you know what? Some women rocked this look in
the seventies eighties, like this tight perm look really dark hair. Yeah,
well I'll put it on a nicer leg as soon as.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It Honestly, it kind of looks the same. TA can
see your hair and it looks like all those like
big fluffy Russian hats.
Speaker 1 (25:37):
Well whatever, this is as good as it's gonna get
right now. Hey wait, we're on the same wavelength the
hair and everything. Wow. Okay, now I really had I
had to buy four different ones of these because I
I could decide which one was best. The first one
(25:59):
is just kind of for you. This isn't gonna be
something you're gonna wear in Vonn's. This is just something
I thought you'd think would be. Okay, here's the first one. Okay,
there you go. It's a T shirt.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Oh actually, I think can.
Speaker 1 (26:18):
I say that please tongue punch my fart box? Oh yeah,
see you like that? See that you would wear that?
Speaker 2 (26:26):
I may wear this okay tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (26:28):
So this is just that's just something funny. Okay, thank you,
We move on. We move on. Can I to the
next one?
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Okay? Is is this just a fun thing to know?
Speaker 1 (26:40):
This one? This one you're probably not gonna want to
wear in public?
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Oh? Are you kidding. I'm totally gonna wear this.
Speaker 1 (26:51):
Oh you're not gonna wear that. Please don't talk to me.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
I have crabs for sure, I am you might be
wearing it in vons later.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
Oh my god, kidding?
Speaker 1 (27:00):
This is that's just the number two. There's four. Okay,
welcome to your probably. I think this might be the
one you're gonna wear.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
Oh I love this?
Speaker 1 (27:19):
You love it?
Speaker 2 (27:20):
Wait? Is this all you got? Kane? No?
Speaker 1 (27:22):
God no, I'm not a good wiper. And it has
a toilet okay. And then finally this one, he's the
one I want you to wear.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Okay, Oh my god, this is amazing vegetarian because I
know how much I love.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Vegetoh god, the Hillcrest really respond to that?
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, I'm okay.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
All right, So there's your topk see, it didn't go
too crazy to make you wear something like but you
know you got to pick from crabs. I'm not a
good wiper or vegetarian vegetarian Okay, okay, all.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Right, Okay, I know how much you love crowns.
Speaker 1 (28:08):
Okay, mm hmm. Should I just stick it on before
I look at it?
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Sure? Let me put it on.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Okay, Okay, it was my pretty little wig. I do
love crowns. I do feel like Okay, ready, here we go. Okay,
you gotta fix it his lights. I heard something switch on.
So it is a.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
It's a little mouse mouse, a little ratitituwy with a
chess hat. Okay, it's got little clips in his little
mouse paws and he it holds up your hair.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Okay, yeah, okay, well you know what, I actually look
like somebody that would be in my neighborhood once. I
actually look like.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
That's why this is perfect. So okay, okay, close your eyes. Okay, okay,
so this is Oh I got t shirt too? Okay yep,
simply says blow me. Okay, all right, I actually like this.
(29:21):
I may cut it into like more of a crappy
looking shirt.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
You can wear that, I think, so, I think so okay,
now are you ready?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
Wait?
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Oh no, you're right, you're still going close your eyes. Okay.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
You know, with with that, I figured you probably don't
want to just wear a shirt, and you should wear
some pants.
Speaker 1 (29:44):
Yes, these seem comfortable. Okay me, before I open my eyes?
Speaker 3 (29:59):
Is that a function?
Speaker 2 (30:00):
No pocket up front?
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Or is that just.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
My dogs are gonna love?
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Oh boy, you little you know how it is how
elephants and mice have been is thing. Oh you know
you can't you can't close your eyes, okay, because we
have to complete this outfit. Okay, so hold out your hands.
I don't want you to have to go barefooted.
Speaker 1 (30:29):
No god, no, no, oh my god. These are.
Speaker 3 (30:38):
Right now.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
You're awful.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
But they've got like the little bumps on the bottom
or like they're fabulous. You look great.
Speaker 1 (30:53):
Okay, now it's your turn. Okay, Now, these aren't something.
This is not what I want you to wear when
we go to Vond's. Okay, this is just for you
to lounge around or actually go to. You can actually
probably just bounce to t J Max if you want
(31:13):
to and the Okay, so here you go. They're nice
and comfy. Open it up.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
Oh my god, in the.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
Front of the back, so you'll always have me with you.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
Because I'll have VPL and these for sure right at
your mouth. But you have like this, Oh, but that's.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
Not what I want you to wear. This goes underneath
what I want you to wear, kind of what I'm
wearing right now, but black. Okay, Now, I.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Don't think these came from.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
They did, oh guy, qualification.
Speaker 1 (32:10):
But I know you needed some coverings because you're gonna
be cold.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
Allow it, okay, Okay, well I think there's a disqualification here.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Now I'll allow it there for your own benefit.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Just okay. Oh, I forgot to give you this thing. Okay,
what before you go out, before you be the final
piece of the outfit, I bought you something that you
can spare on yourself so you have a scent when
you walk in. Oh.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Okay, there you go. Okay, Oh, stinky ass fart bomb.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
Yeah, it's stinky fart bomb spray. So that's gonna be
your cologne that you're gonna spray on before you go
into Bonds.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
This.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Oh god, don't wait, did you open it yet? Oh god,
I don't know this. This came out. I don't smell
it smells like ass apparently. Oh god, I don't know.
You smell it.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
I can't smell like anything.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
We'll spray it.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
I'm not gonna do it right now. Okay, I don't
want to throw up.
Speaker 1 (33:16):
You've got to spray it on yourself though before Okay.
Speaker 4 (33:19):
Now, that's part of the Holes package, part of the package,
part of the Bonds walk through.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Okay, now, Eric I had.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
Two choices for your bottoms. Those are just your loungers,
I see. Okay, now you could either wear a.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
These okay, oh wow, these are and that will show
VPL like nobody's business.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
But you have a T shirt so that it could
be a big problem. But what I really think you
should wear are these.
Speaker 4 (33:59):
Okay, yeah, no, yes, that's why I got you the
fish nets.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Flip it around, flip it around.
Speaker 1 (34:12):
They are Geane. Yes, you can wear They're like Jeane
iper O Jean diaper.
Speaker 3 (34:19):
There is a concern though, because I know he's not
wearing underwear yet that won't hide anything.
Speaker 1 (34:23):
That's why I got you the fish that will hold
it in place.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Have you met me?
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Okay, so now here's what we're gonna do. And you
know what I also for just for wolves and fun.
Huh long black gloves.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Uh okay.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Now these did not come.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
I know, but I wanted to complete the outfit. This
is just this is just yeah. I want to keep
you warm.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
I think that there should be a couple of points
taken off.
Speaker 3 (34:59):
I think that these will keep I think this is
a safety thing.
Speaker 1 (35:01):
These are to keep Brian, Thank you, Brian.
Speaker 3 (35:05):
Wow, Brian feeling honestly, those are not those are not
gonna be like the tie breakers though.
Speaker 1 (35:10):
Okay, let's who should put on the full outfit first.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
I'm not done. Oh okay, Oh no, miss Kane, continue,
I still have things for you.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Okay, I have a full outfit already though.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
Oh yeah, I wanted you to be able to change.
You know, you like to have those wardrobe changes. So
oh no, I'm not even near dead.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
No, all right, rap rapid fire, yeah, okay, here we go. Okay,
so I figured, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
We'll start with yes.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
Okay, so, oh hey, well I can't put them over
my little ratituy, I I don't mind this too much. Okay, great,
thank you, I like the little rat better.
Speaker 2 (36:06):
And then close your eyes. Okay, you're gonna need something
to go with this other outfit, so okay, I thought
you might need some fancy ear rings.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
Okay, I can't even tell what these are, but oh
my god, tampons.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
They're bloody pads that I don't think Eric knows what
tampa he doesn't, no, he doesn't. I mean they're ew
ew ew e.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
No one know. Nobody would even know what these are.
They probably would just think that they're cute. That's gross,
but I know it's gross when you know what they are. Okay,
ew but thank you? Okay, that goes all. Just put
them on right now.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Yeah for sure, okay, okay. And then I figured, oh
are you oh lovely? Look great?
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Thank you? Perfect, I'm all in.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Okay, do you know what these are?
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Oh? Yes, it's a bloody pad. Yeah, yeah, I know.
Don't Yeah, poor Marie has no voice so she can't. Yes,
my roommate is not feeling well, so don't do this.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Then I thought, you know, in case you need to
like run your hands through your hair or anything like that.
Speaker 1 (37:19):
Okay, are your eyes closed? Yes they are.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
You might also, because you're probably gonna be cold, you
might need some gloves.
Speaker 1 (37:33):
These are like Lady Gogach type of situation going on. Yes, absolutely,
I kind of like these. These are witchy and like fun. Yeah,
I'm going to get you my pretty. I'm going to
get you my pretty. They have these long nails attached
to the black. Oh look we got each other gloves.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Oh lot, we are so simpatico.
Speaker 1 (37:58):
Look yes, yes gloves, yes closure.
Speaker 2 (38:04):
Okay, Oh jeez, you also have a lovely talk that
you can wear.
Speaker 1 (38:13):
Oh. Another top. Oh it's another shirt. Okay, are you
kidding me? Are you even kidding me? We both got
please tongue pune my part batch all right, Oh god,
I will not be wearing this.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
I will not, Yes, you will so yes, So once again,
I don't want you to just go pantsless.
Speaker 1 (38:41):
Okay, I even have these great pants.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
Oh yeah, no, but you.
Speaker 1 (38:45):
Know, okay, okay, Wow, I have so many choices, you
really do. Okay, these look like oh my, like they
have a little daisies. They're like leggings, are light blue
with like pink belt and little daisies in the yellow pockets.
Speaker 2 (39:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
Oh boil yea.
Speaker 2 (39:11):
Every woman when there is decked out lovely look fly
you're going to need some accessories.
Speaker 1 (39:18):
Besides the bloody pads. Oh my god, Oh this feels significant. Yes.
Oh it's a purse. It's a popcorn a popcorn a
bucket purse.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Yes, I kind of. Now it's fun.
Speaker 1 (39:39):
I can wear it to the movie.
Speaker 2 (39:41):
Oh, totally fill up with now if you open it.
There's also some surprises, and when that happens, Yes, what
is Christmas without surprises? So these you can put on
your credit.
Speaker 1 (39:54):
Card, they say, help me, I'm poor. Thanks a lot.
There's stickers, a card sticker.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
They go on your credit card. Yes, this is for
your car.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Ask me about my explosive diarrhea.
Speaker 2 (40:11):
Thank you, welcome. And then this you can put on
your computer. It says here, let me open that for you,
miss King.
Speaker 1 (40:20):
That's my computer. This is for my car. This is
for my cards. Yes, okay, it's a guy's face. Just
ask mcfucking had it. Just about mcfucking had it.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
Okay, that's the McDonald's clown. Okay, Ronald McDonald.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
So there you want to say the ford like really
is super loud like that, but I just did. Hey,
I had to read what was in front.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Now I've saved the best for last. Well, you know
how much I love you.
Speaker 1 (40:48):
You were not kidding around this time. There's something else
in here.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
Oh you'r change purse.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
Oh this is cute.
Speaker 2 (40:58):
I like it.
Speaker 1 (40:59):
Actually a little polaroid, like an old school polaroid. It's
for change or it could be for like my aarpods
or something. Yeah, okay, exactly, thank you. That's so sweet.
Speaker 2 (41:08):
All right, sweet this crap in there? Okay, Now I
expect to see that bumper sticker on your car. Tomarle, Okay,
I'll come looking. Oh, Marie, you might want to stick
around for this.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
Oh she's sick, leave her alone.
Speaker 2 (41:21):
Oh, she's gonna want to stick around for this. So
you know how much I love you?
Speaker 1 (41:25):
Yes, so obviously I can tell ye. So okay, I'm
not looking.
Speaker 2 (41:36):
With this outfit. I got you a little.
Speaker 1 (41:40):
Another another cap. Oh, it says crop duster and it
has a little pin on it that says I pooped today?
Speaker 2 (41:51):
Right, wow, exactly.
Speaker 1 (41:52):
That is just so special? So special?
Speaker 2 (41:56):
Yeah for sure?
Speaker 1 (41:56):
So is that it?
Speaker 2 (41:58):
No? God, So you know you're gonna need accessories to
go with that. I mean, you know it is Christmas.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Oh. They're Taco Bell earrings with a Taco Bell like logo,
and it says I ship I ship myself.
Speaker 2 (42:17):
I know how much you like Taco Bell. I love
talking you do? Yes, yes, see how much what you're saying?
Speaker 1 (42:25):
I know you?
Speaker 2 (42:26):
And then you know me so well I do? And
then close your eyes Okay, oh my god, so you
know to keep the sun out of your eyes.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
Oh that's something you have not given me this year.
So I just put them on without looking. Yeah, okay,
here we go.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
They're remarkably normal.
Speaker 1 (42:46):
What's wrong with these.
Speaker 3 (42:48):
Heart shaped sunglasses.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
These are cute. Yeah, well I can wear these at night.
Speaker 3 (42:54):
It makes how many items do you have?
Speaker 2 (42:56):
Just a couple? Just a couple, next, next day?
Speaker 3 (43:00):
The limit.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
Okay, So once again another shirt.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
This one says oh really, no really, okay, it says,
may I suggest the roast beef with a finger pointing
down to my crop? Now that is disgusting, Eric, that
is discussed.
Speaker 2 (43:26):
Well, this is the outpha that you will be wearing
it too much?
Speaker 1 (43:31):
Oh no, so.
Speaker 2 (43:35):
Close your eyes.
Speaker 5 (43:38):
Okay, okay, okay, this is oh some undies.
Speaker 1 (43:48):
Yes, look we did the same kind of thing. It's
Eric's face. You're wearing like a he's wearing like a
Oh you were in your little yes, and it has
I'll wear these. I will wear the heck out of
these because your face.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
All over you wanted me to see your vagina, So
now my little face will be pressed for.
Speaker 5 (44:13):
And then okay, this has got to be the last one.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
Okay, all right, all right, So I can't just have
you go in those no and that shirt?
Speaker 1 (44:25):
No, so oh no more pants geez.
Speaker 2 (44:29):
So I figure you'll need to put something over those.
Speaker 1 (44:32):
Okay pants, Oh my god, these look like what are
these called? Uh like? There their sheer, but like Little
House on the Prairie used to wear them like they're
like they're pinafores, pedal pushers, like.
Speaker 2 (44:51):
Leg a little and look where's my face?
Speaker 1 (44:55):
Oh? I have weight. I can't walk into Vonds wearing
just well, you'll be wearing Wait, who says I'm losing? Okay,
now I have almost all my things on? What are
we at this point? Okay, here's here's what we can do.
(45:17):
Either Eric can put on his outfit or you can
imagine him with his outfit on. We'll just take pictures
after and post those. Or he goes and changes into
his outfit right now. Spect the shorts and uh the shirt. Brian,
you make the call. What do you think before you
make the final call about who won the Terrible Team
(45:38):
who contest?
Speaker 3 (45:39):
I think what we should do is we should leave
a little bit suspense. Okay, we'll end here. I'll push
the results at the beginning of the next show with
you guys dressed up.
Speaker 1 (45:47):
With the walk through.
Speaker 3 (45:50):
The walk through.
Speaker 1 (45:51):
I love this idea, and you know what you guys, Please,
if you will, why don't you comment let us know
you think who won this? I mean, even though Eric
brought way more stuff than I did. That doesn't necessarily
mean he won, right, right, right, right blinds not saying comment.
Speaker 3 (46:15):
Okay, I already suspect who I think I know the
winner will be. But it depends on I guess what
outfit combination we see? Okay, you guys have to decide
which combination ends up being worn by each person.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
Okay, so next oh so next episode will the person
be wearing the outfit on the show? Gotcha?
Speaker 3 (46:33):
Okay, there we go.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
So you're gonna have stay tuned to Thursday's show. Thank
you for watching tonight. Good job Eric, and you're rocking
that mullet. You look great.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
You look certifiable.
Speaker 1 (46:45):
I do mind?
Speaker 3 (46:46):
Do you look like a Disney movie villain from the
late nineties?
Speaker 1 (46:50):
I know, yeah, looks like a ridiculous.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
You're gonna scare somebody people in Vonds coll but in Hillcrest.
Speaker 1 (46:58):
Okay, anyway, thank you guys so much for watching. And
uh yeah, our last show of the year is gonna
be on Thursday. We have a lot to say and
a lot to do besides this, so make sure you
stick around. Thank you doing jewelry. Thank you Ljoia Cosmetic.
Love you so much. And thanks for watching. Love your podcast,
Love your podcast, Bye bye,
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