May 25, 2026 • 44 mins
Laura is headed to NYC to celebrate her daughter’s graduation from Fordham University with honors, and the proud mom emotions are REAL. From raising a magical little fairy-mermaid-warrior princess to watching her become a total queen of the world, Laura can barely put into words how proud she is. But because this podcast can never stay emotional for too long…we immediately spiral into absolute chaos with a truth-or-dare style drinking game. Since nobody actually drinks, Laura created the most horrifying punishment beverage imaginable: a disgusting Clamato concoction that nearly took everyone out. It’s unhinged, ridiculous, laugh-out-loud funny, and honestly…someone may never recover.
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Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/laura-cain-after-dark--4162487/support.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Lara Kane after Dark with Eric remembers of podcast You're
dig If you like a genuine and left so big.
Laura's a love of ballunatic with a vive so brial.
The stories are crazy, the real deal. Eric's the talent
and people with says he's kind. Hell le me get
some kind of crass purtas are Claire runs the show
Susper plain nerd always in the note we guarantee to
(00:21):
make you laugh.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Plus sure we're late. Bumble your seat belts and don't
be late. Here we go. Get ready, it'll be great
on with the show.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Okay, hey, everybody, welcome to Loura Kane after Dark. This
is a very exciting day because it's our last show
for a week. Because we all three, it just so happens,
are going to different locations on trips for different reasons
(00:51):
and it's I am beyond excited. I'm emotional, and I'm
going to see my daughter graduate from college. I have
something I wrote for her. I don't want to show you.
Some things that I'm going to present to her for gifts. Okay,
Eric is going to Seattle with his one of his besties, Karen.
(01:16):
We're going to spend a lot of solo time together
and bonding time, which is beautiful and great. But I'm
a little I am jealous. I'm jealous. I'm just I'm jealous. Okay, sorry,
can you deal with that? I can? Do you understand?
Speaker 2 (01:30):
I do?
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Okay, Claire is going to be let's see, let's pick
it is stan Bull? Is there a reason we picked
Istanbul as a family trip?
Speaker 4 (01:47):
Honestly, I'm just along for the ride.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
Do you know why your parents picked that? Just because
there were there were a.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Number of places. It was one of a number of
places that was sort of tossed around.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Have they ever been before?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
That's been Oh but.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We haven't all been together.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Okay, are you staying in a nice hotel?
Speaker 4 (02:08):
I hope so. Frankly, I know nothing. Could I be
so serious?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
But is that on purpose?
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
I'm just like along for the ride. I'm just like,
I just work here. It's kind of great.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I think that's actually a fine way to do this.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Like, I know the flight I need to get on
right and then after.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
That, okay, you also need to go. You need to
know the weather.
Speaker 4 (02:30):
Yes, I know that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Okay, Oh god, Laura, what's the matter. I can smell that.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Okay, I'm gonna talk about that in a second. Oh
my god, we're wearing these big, giant, gaudy necklaces because
we are supporting FIFA. Are are We are a soccer
city now, a big time soccer city. Snap Dragon Stadium
is where we play and and this is the USA Eric. Yes,
(03:04):
And so my friend Maggie says, you guys really need
to embrace soccer because it's such a big part of
San Diego now. And it is and our soccer team
is incredible, so Go San Diego Football Club make a
lot of home runs. Oh my god, Okay, now I'm
gonna take this soft because it's like really choking me.
(03:25):
But this is really cool. We love soccer all right. Now,
before we play our drinking game, we're playing a drinking game,
and it's truth or dare or it's just or. There's
also questions who is the most likely too and whoever
we decide that person is has to drink. There are
(03:48):
two choices of drinks. Oh, there's clamato, which is tomato
juice mixed with oyster juice. Nope, okay, And then I
made a concoction that I thought was so horrific. It's
seven up, it's green juice, it's saracha sauce and soy sauce,
(04:12):
and I forgot there's one other element I put in there,
and I'm not sure, but it's gotta be terrible because
none of us drink. You're not a big drinker. Clear.
I know that you can drink, and you have had
cocktails and stuff, but you're not like a huge drinker.
Eric doesn't drink and I don't drink. So this is
how we're playing the drink.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
The fact that she doesn't remember the one ingredient that
she can't remember, I like, but.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
A dash of something weird. I forgot though, I totally forgot.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
You do know what this means?
Speaker 5 (04:43):
Though?
Speaker 6 (04:44):
What?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
No, you're not gonna puke, You're.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Gonna Besides that, what does it mean? You may want
to bring a bucket, But that means when we all
get back from vacation, Yeah, we're gonna do a little
number called Laura Caane Eat this not that.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Oh gosh, have you have we played this with you?
Speaker 4 (05:06):
Yes, very early on early first.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
I'm gonna be on vacation, Claire. I will be able
to think of lots of things. There might be drink
this not that.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
Oh god, well, Claire, did we tell you about the
one time he I'm blindfolded when he feeds me these
mysterious items. One of the things I put in my
mouth felt like soft like feathers, and I wasn't I
was like, what is this? It was his hair from
(05:43):
down there? No, yes, it was.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
He did a little man's skate and.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Put it in a little cup and I put it
in my mouth.
Speaker 6 (05:52):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
So yeah, that's how this game goes sometimes. So it's
really not that fun for me. It's funny straight up.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
If someone did that to me, I'd never forgive them
and we wouldn't be friends.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
I know you guys have something.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
You really are lovely.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I have a great friend, but I still you know what,
you know what, it's unconditional for me.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Oh my god, Now that you've brought it to the
attention of producer Claire and her reaction, you know what,
I will look at your vagina. Really, I figure it's
the least I can do.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
I have a very small vagina, just so you know, Like, so.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
I'm going to need a magnifying So it's not like.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
It's not obscene, it's not obtrusive, Like if I showed
it to you, you wouldn't go, oh my god, this
is a big, fat giant Oh so it's all tucked
in there, it's all nice. It's not that big a deal.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Can you put a little lipstick on it? It?
Speaker 3 (06:50):
Lets talk about my vagina's okay? Can we not? Can
we not?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Like, you know, make it pretty.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
Okay before we get into the drinking game, which is
gonna go rowdy. I wanted to show you a couple
of things that I'm bringing to New York City to
give to Evan for her graduation. One of the things
is a piece of jewelry I'm having made for her.
I pick it up tomorrow. It's like, I spent a
lot of money on this and I saved up and
(07:18):
I be.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Sure you don't want to sell that tomorrow too, you
know right, I have to believe it.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
But it's a bracelet and it has a little starfish
on it. And the starfish is significant because she when
she was little, believed with her whole heart that she
was from the sea, that she was a mermaid, and
that shed she she had a mermaid tale. She had
the whole thing she did, and she loved this movie.
(07:45):
I think it was called H two Oh yes, okay,
is that the one that has uh Emma Roberts in it.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
I think the Australian girls who can.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Oh, yeah, the Australian girls. Okay, so it was or
Mako Mermaids. It was one of those kind of movies.
Speaker 4 (08:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
But the way that the ocean life communicate with mermaids
are starfish. You put starfish as earrings. Mermaids were these
little starfish earrings, and the little starfish talk to them
and give them advice and give them like positive words
of affirmation, and it's just so cute. So they stick
these little things on their ears. So it's it's significant
(08:23):
of her childhood and of her beliefs that she is
a mermaid and magical and it's going to be really cute.
So it's a little fourteen here gold, little dangly bracelet.
So anyway, that's like the big thing, and it wasn't
she I'm sure the.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
World thinks to me as a starfish sometimes because I
give you, I just tell you affirmations and no, you
don't positive things, yes, so you don't like, don't worry
about turning sixty two. You still look great.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
God, Claire, that wasn't funny this time?
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Is it getting old?
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Right?
Speaker 4 (08:57):
It's getting married?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
There we go, Hello, we only have another couple of weeks.
Speaker 4 (09:03):
Okay, and then it'll be sixty three, which would be
a whole new ball, a new space to play.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Then I made her one of these this is so cute,
which is like a little it's a it's a gallery.
It's like a little tiny like art gallery. And each
one of these little pictures I printed out and they
have meaning and there's like little people that are looking
at the gallery. And then you do this boom and
(09:28):
the lights come on on the little gallery. So it's
just a fun little thing that she is. It just
has meaningful pictures that she'll love. So that's one thing.
And then I took my polaroid camera and I went
around and I took pictures of all the things that
make her happy, and I put it in this little book.
And it starts off with a picture of San Diego
(09:52):
and then me and then Grandma Mary making rice and
meat which is our favorite meal. Flowers, the dogs, Marie
or roommate, you are in it, Ausy. This is a
picture of her and Charlie when they were little the
house I grew upon that that Evan believes she's gonna
(10:13):
buy someday. It's in Glendale, just like various pictures up.
Here's another one that me and you. She loves you
Hillcrest Sign and just like some just various places we've
gone and love. And so that's just this little photo
album thing me and then I'm going to read you
(10:33):
something because I'm so proud of her. She is I
was corrected. She's double majoring in communications in theater and
minoring in Spanish. God, and she was on the Dean's
list all the years she's been. Wow, I know she
(10:54):
is just she is so hard working. Her attitude is
so incredible. She's got the best, best attitude, and she's
just a magical being. And I'm so proud to be
her mom. And this is just so monumental.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
And it just shows how great of a mom you are,
because both your kids are amazing.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Okay, here we go to Evan Elizabeth. Twenty one years ago,
you arrived in the world with an opinion and you
haven't stopped sharing it since. Thank God. Here's what I
know about my daughter. She's the kind of person who
makes a room feel more alive just by walking into it.
She's sunshine in human form. She asked the questions other
(11:40):
people are too polite to ask, but she asks them politely.
She laughs loud, and she means every emotion she exudes.
She has a mind that cuts right through nonsense. She
is a bullshit spotter. She is sincere to the core
(12:00):
and authentic and appreciates that in other people. She has
a huge heart, big enough to make it feel like
it's a gift that you are given. Like any person
that meets Evan has spent time with Evan, you feel
better coming away from that meeting. Fordham gave her four years.
(12:24):
She gave it everything she had and still had enough
left over to worry about everything she loves, worry about me,
call me, FaceTime me her family, and hold down a
full time corporate position in her last semester of college. Evan,
I've watched you become somebody I incredibly admire, not only
(12:47):
as your parent, but as a person. You are smarter
than you were, brave and enough to believe when you started,
and braver than you ever gave yourself credit for. I
told you that you were gonna look back on these
last few months and go, Wow, how in the world
(13:08):
did I do that? Full time school, full time work,
subway rides to and from, living on her own, paying
her own rent. Like this girl is amazing. The world
does not know what's coming, but I do. Go get it. Baby.
(13:30):
I'm going to be right here crying obviously, but so proud.
And I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna
do when I see her walk across that stage. And
you have to take pictures, well, yes, be prepared for
an onslaught of videos and sappy uh sappie reels and
(13:55):
crying uh selfies with me explaining how I'm feeling at
the moment, because I like sharing things with you, guys,
and I know that you're with me, so I can't
wait to tell you all about it.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
I can't wait to hear it.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
We're gonna be gone next week, you guys, but we'll
be back in full effect the following week.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Lots of stories to tell.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
And I think my birthdays May twenty fourth, so when
we come back, I think, wait, when is my birthday?
What is it? What date? Does it lank? Is it
on if it's on a Sunday?
Speaker 2 (14:33):
No, it's on like a Wednesday. Or something, isn't it?
Or a mona?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Well, what do you guys have planned for my big
birthday podcast?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (14:43):
Oh so much?
Speaker 3 (14:46):
No, my birthday is on Sunday?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Sunday?
Speaker 3 (14:50):
Well, well okay, so on the twenty Memorial Day? Do
you guys want to work Memorial Day? Are you okay
with that?
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Okay, we'll celebrate on Memorial Day. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
I don't get holidays off from we have a job either,
so nor do I doesn't make a difference.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Same thing I'm off Memorial Day?
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Are good to come in here?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Yeah? Yeah, I mean that's your you know.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
Can you pencil us in? Can you pencil her in
for her birthday?
Speaker 2 (15:16):
For sure?
Speaker 4 (15:16):
You're very kind.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
It'll give me time to a dollar.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Will you guys do something fun for me? Can you
surprise me? I love surprises? You do I expect something?
I expect something. I expect something from you guys, some
kind of like decoration or the decoration in your house. Yes,
you can bring or or maybe a little speech, maybe
(15:44):
a poem. I don't know anything. It doesn't have to
cost money.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
A lot of us.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Does not have to cost you. It has to cost money. Okay,
I'm not kidding, and I don't want anything from the team,
but you already said you got me something.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I did?
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Okay, I did. Oh, I'll be not at well, you know,
I'll be grateful for whatever you give me, but I
beat down. I'll be disappointed if it's from the dollar Tree.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Do you honestly think? Do you think I would get
you a gift from the dollar Tree?
Speaker 6 (16:14):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:15):
Oh, that gift is going back?
Speaker 3 (16:19):
All right, guys, no play some sort of like music.
I don't even care.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
I'm I'm gonna throw up.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
So there we go. Here we go. This is the
ultimate game. We're playing a drinking game. I don't know.
You've got some moves, right, she's doing the isolated.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I've taken a theater class. I'm a strong mover. I
can isolate my shoulders.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
Oh wait, we're gonna start taking pole dancing classes.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Oh yeah, for real, for real. My friend who does
it is has invited me, and I'm gonna.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
Can you bring friends?
Speaker 3 (16:56):
Can you explain the situation to her?
Speaker 4 (16:59):
I think I'm the d It's like a friend discount thing.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
Well, so I don't care about discounts, but like to
tell her that we want to like.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
I'll go I'll do the first one and I'll report
back and I'll tell you if we should invest.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
Okay, why can't I come with you the first time?
I guess I don't. You don't know. I don't, but
I don't. But I will pay full price, like I
don't care. I'll speak coming as your friend. I won't
expect a discount.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Okay, I'll ask them, But I think we should.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
Experience this together first. That's at And I want to
know if there is a performance at the end of
the classes that we will be taking. Yeah, because if so,
I'm thinking Laura kne after dark party with listeners and
the performance with my Sturfer song. Oh yeah, it's gonna
(17:47):
be amazing on you. You can do that, oh totally
all day long? Okay, all right, So Claire, you've got
your two choices of drinks, which are hideous. We've got
ours over here, and we'll start off with truth or dare. Okay, Okay, now, Claire,
(18:12):
we're starting with you.
Speaker 5 (18:13):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Now you have to either answer the truth or do
the dare. If you don't do either, you drink. Okay, truth,
how many people have you slept with? Or dare? Do
a freestyle wrap for thirty seconds, which do you choose
(18:40):
or take a sip, drink.
Speaker 4 (18:43):
The nasty juice of the nasty juice. My mom's on
the internet.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
I'll do how many people believe you slept with? Or
do a rap freestyle rap.
Speaker 4 (18:51):
I'm going to do a freestyle rap.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Oh my god, someone's got to give me a beat.
Speaker 7 (18:56):
Okay, boom boom boom boom boom boom, Yeah boom boom.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Oh no, boom boo.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
Bora average ala together making the podcast. They're gonna make
a big They're gonna go to Hollywood and get famous,
and then they're gonna make this into a movie.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
All right. I love where that way. All right, so
you were spared the drinking Eric, You're eitherna have to
answer the truth question or do the dare and the
dare I have a feeling you're gonna be drinking God,
oh truth, reveal honestly, your first impression of the person
(19:57):
to your left is that me, or suck the toe
of the person in the room, either one of us
for fifteen seconds.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
All truth.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
It super easy, and I want you to be dead serious, Okay,
even if it won't hurt my feelings because I know
where we stand now, But what was your first impression
of me when you met me?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
Easy? I thought you were so vulnerable and funny and kind,
and you spoke.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Your truth, nothing but the things.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
No.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
I fell in love with you like the minute. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:45):
Did you think I was cute? Yeah? I thought you
were in person?
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Did you think I thought you were much prettier in
person than you photograph?
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Thank you? I was going to say, did I look
like you thought I was going to live?
Speaker 4 (20:59):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Okay, hmm, thank you? All good? All right? So okay,
so now here's me.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Let me read it for you, okay, Laura Kane. Yes, truth,
Reveal the thing you would do if it was illegal,
if it was legal. Reveal the thing you would do
if it was legal. Okay, oh I see Okay. Or
dare call the person you fancy and ask them and
(21:26):
tell them you have been thinking of their peachy arts.
Then hang up.
Speaker 3 (21:30):
They're British, this is British.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Mm hmm. Truth. Reveal the thing you would do if
it was legal. Dare call the person you fancy and
ask them if you have been and tell them you
have been thinking of their ass. Then hang up.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
I want to do that one. But I'm trying to
think who I fancy. Should I do a Hantson again? No,
I can't believe.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Oh god, he's gonna think you're insane.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
No, no, he will, he totally will.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
I can't do the other one. How about, Oh.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
I guess you're just gonna have to drink then, no,
well there's no other alternative.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
Let me look up something on my phone. Meney no
no no no no no no no no no no
no no no no no no.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
No, let him go, Eenie mean miney mo, here we go.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
No no no no no no no no no no
no no no no no no no no no no.
I am going to No, actually, I'm going to go
through my phone and I'm going to Uh, I'm going
to look up somebody, and I'm going to the first
person that I see that's a dude. No. Yes, if
my phone rings, it's like going to be you. How
(22:53):
about oh my god, oh my, oh Sam Bass, poor
Sam Bass, dead Sam Bass. He used to be on
the radio. He was a great guy. Ben Fletcher is married.
I wouldn't do that to him. How about, uh, I
know there's somebody coming up that Oh okay, okay, am
(23:19):
I up. Yes, I'm gonna call former DSc member Chris Boyer.
Oh boy, I always thought he was kind of cute.
Speaker 5 (23:40):
Decide to take my offer. Chris Boyer, Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
You're on Laura Cane after Dark right now.
Speaker 5 (23:50):
That is fantastic. I know I'm gonna disappoint you.
Speaker 3 (23:54):
No, you're not, because here's the deal. We're playing truth
or dare. We're playing a game, but obviously with things
that aren't alcoholic that are really atrocious. So the dare
is I have to call somebody I fancy and tell
them that I missed their sweet ass. So Chris Boyer,
(24:15):
I missed your sweet ass.
Speaker 5 (24:17):
Wow. Well that's four hundred dollars in it for you
if you come through.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Can I tell them about the four hundred dollars?
Speaker 5 (24:24):
Yes? Do you want to review the negotiation?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
Yes? About a year? This is a year ago or
two years ago?
Speaker 5 (24:32):
About two years ago? I don't know when. When When
were you really desperate?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Uh? This afternoon I was really desperate. This is about
a year and a half ago. I think we've been
friends since, like I started in radio, even though we
were on compete competing.
Speaker 5 (24:56):
Oh my god, it is when we worked in the
same building.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
We were the top morning shows DSc and the Jeff
Andnger Show. But we were all friends, like the DC
family and especially being Chris. So he says to me
one day, he goes, Hey, if you want to come over,
here's I'll give you four hundred dollars for an hour,
(25:20):
and all we have to do is have sex you.
We had parameters, right, well, it was an hour's worth
of time, right, and.
Speaker 5 (25:30):
I was going to allow you to take the shower
time out of the hour.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
He was dead serious. He sent me a picture of
four hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Splay it out, Chris. This screams like a sequel to
Pretty Woman.
Speaker 5 (25:46):
You'll call it ugly, old man.
Speaker 3 (25:47):
I know, but here's the deal. Things have changed. The
four hundred dollars still is out there for the taken,
but the parameters have changed.
Speaker 5 (26:00):
Yeah, because I told her. I said, I don't want
to renegotiate at the time, either ninety minutes or two hours.
And I promise you I can still bring it.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Chris, what area do do you live in?
Speaker 5 (26:11):
I live in San Diego, California.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Oh so he's close close. What are you what are
you waiting for?
Speaker 3 (26:17):
I know, right, I need money for New York.
Speaker 5 (26:19):
I was waiting for her to say yes because I
had set aside the money. It was going to be
two hundred for the hour. And let's see, I was
going to allow fifteen minutes for a shower inside the hour,
paid for by me, paid for by me. It was
(26:40):
going to be, and it was going to be seven
dollars an hour for overtime. I'm sorry, seven dollars a
minute for overtime.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
Yeah, it was a good deal. I should have taken
him up on the offer when I had, when I had.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
With that include cuddling up with her on the couch
and watching a couple episodes of ninety de Fiance.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
No, this is all no no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
This is all just bony.
Speaker 3 (27:00):
As is all boning. And now the time has expanded.
Now I have to Now it's an hour and a half.
Speaker 5 (27:06):
Yeah, you're gonna have to suffer at least ninety minutes
on this one, sweetheart, because look, you know, I mean.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
Do we make out? Do we have to make out
a lot? Is it kidding? A kissing?
Speaker 5 (27:19):
You never kiss your hooker?
Speaker 3 (27:23):
Okay, I would rather not be referred to as a hooker.
I think this is a different circumstance. Even though I
am being paid, I'm technically am a prostitute.
Speaker 5 (27:35):
But I mean what we all are. Let's face it,
we all are right.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Right, Listen, I have a I have a way to
settle this. What if he films it, you'd just be
a porn star.
Speaker 5 (27:48):
You and I think somebody else would have to pay her.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Yeah, we're not feeling like that's the deal.
Speaker 5 (27:56):
That's the deal. Well, I'd have to find, you know,
some shoot girl, because I want to I want some
other guy checking out my ball sack while I'm trying to,
you know, get my stroke on. So yeah, we'd have
to find one of those lady production houses, uh, you know,
the the cat house sensitive porn interactions or something that.
Speaker 3 (28:18):
Adds another one hundred dollars on top. So that's a
five hundred dollars deal there, now, Chris, Okay, let.
Speaker 5 (28:24):
Me put it. If it's five hundred, do I get
the Do I get the rights to it?
Speaker 3 (28:29):
Oh, we'd have to negotiate that. I think we'd have
to split that.
Speaker 5 (28:35):
Uh we're going to be split in something.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
That's for sure, split in some weight.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
You want the same cut on intellectual property. I'll chat
with my attorney.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Happen now, Chris, I will tell you this. I am
willing to take my time. You don't even need to
pay me to shoot it, because listen, I've seen a
lot of balls. I mean, I.
Speaker 5 (28:57):
Feeling that you sound like a guy who might.
Speaker 2 (28:59):
Have a lot of time.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
So judge, he would not.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I would not be judge, Judy.
Speaker 5 (29:06):
Yeah, you've probably, you know, taken more balls off the
chin than Hank Aaron.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Probably. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
The only thing is I want to see my vagina.
That's the only problem.
Speaker 5 (29:18):
Yeah, well, uh, you know what. I don't think you
need to see any of it. I mean, okay, he can,
he can see the finished project, and I'm okay with that.
But I see.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Right, okay, Well all right, Chris, that's still up in
the air. And thank you for sending me again the
picture of the four hundred dollars last listen.
Speaker 5 (29:39):
I just want to remind you, you know what, everything
in life is sales, and I'm just looking to close
the deal.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
Oh wow, yes, all right, And.
Speaker 5 (29:48):
Every woman has a price. Listen, don't be fooled. Every woman,
every person has a price. You're not lying after that price.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
You're not live.
Speaker 5 (29:57):
I had a who wrote a you know, a paper
one time? Right, what would you what would you charge
to lick a donkey's tee teeth? Pee? Yeah, open the
mouth and give the teeth a good licking. I mean
there's a certain element of risk, yes, and there's a
(30:17):
certain element of shame. So what's your price? Right?
Speaker 3 (30:20):
I mean what did you say?
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Everybody's I just I didn't reply.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
My price would be I do it for five grand?
Speaker 5 (30:31):
I think, yeah, I think you can find somebody who
who would do it for last?
Speaker 3 (30:35):
How about it I do it for fifteen hundred?
Speaker 5 (30:38):
Yes? Ah, boy? Would I do it for fourteen?
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Like?
Speaker 5 (30:42):
And you got to go one hundred dollars increment? Right?
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (30:45):
So otherwise you just nikkel and dying yourself down to zero?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (30:48):
How about fourteen hundred?
Speaker 2 (30:51):
Okay, listen, Chris, I've done a lot more for a
kad cat bar and it's been far worse.
Speaker 5 (30:57):
Right, Well, you know what, you bring a zagnut into
the pay sure, and now you're talking my language.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
There we go.
Speaker 5 (31:03):
I gotta tell you, I don't know twelve fifty? How
about twelve day?
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Stop talking me down?
Speaker 3 (31:08):
No, I'm sticking hard at fifteen hundred and that's it.
Speaker 5 (31:12):
Yeah, I don't think I'm interested. I got to get
a donkey and it's a lot of work.
Speaker 3 (31:17):
Yeah, I gotta get by.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
I'll take her down to TJ. There's plenty of donkeys
down there.
Speaker 3 (31:22):
Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness.
Speaker 5 (31:24):
Right wearing the hat. Yeah, and they're all striped like
a zebra. I don't I don't know what that means.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Zebra.
Speaker 5 (31:31):
And then of course these the the lucky donkeys also
get to work the donkey show too.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
Oh, let's not even go into that realm. But anyway, Chris,
thank you for now. I don't have to drink because
I did my dare, which was calling you.
Speaker 5 (31:46):
See it sounds like you're It sounds like you're blowing
me off.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
I am blowing your sea gets she gets off at nine.
Speaker 5 (31:53):
You know what if you if you just want to
blow me, that's fine too.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
How much is that going to be? How much?
Speaker 5 (31:59):
Well, so the stick don't suck itself? So what's the
what's it worth?
Speaker 3 (32:04):
I don't know. I don't even knowing what's the going right?
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (32:10):
I don't either. You know what I think if a
guy's getting if a guy's paying two hundred bucks to
get his knob gob that's pretty generous. I think.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
Yeah, I'm let's let's for two hundred. Let's do.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
He list, Laura what I'm good with two hundred.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
I do have a problem with my teeth, though, there
is there's an issue with my because I have big
teeth and they sometimes get in the way.
Speaker 5 (32:36):
Oh what if I wore a teflon condom?
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I guess that would work? My God, Chris, we can't
go down this rabbit hole. All right, we gotta go.
Speaker 5 (32:47):
There's plenty of holes we can go down.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Okay, I love you mean it in a couple of hours.
Thanks for answering, by God. Okay, back, shut up, all right, Claire? Yeah,
truth or dare truth? Reveal your favorite sexual fantasy or
(33:14):
dare text the last person you texted asking if they
know where the condoms are?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Okay, the internet's not ready for my sexual fantasies. Everyone's
got to get cool with a lot of things really quickly.
The last person I texted was my sister.
Speaker 3 (33:31):
Okay, well text her? Do you want to text hers
to ask her what the condoms are? No?
Speaker 4 (33:34):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
I'm gonna be Okay, where you going I'm gonna of this. Okay,
here we go our first drink. Oh my god, oh
my god, Oh my god, my god. Oh I got up?
Oh nice? Oh see she's so stoic. Oh okay, Eric
truth be honest? Either, how often do you watch porn?
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (34:01):
Or dare post an ugly picture of yourself on your
Instagram story right now, answer this question about porn. How
often do you watch it? To be honest, or do
the dare or drink?
Speaker 2 (34:21):
Oh? Hell no? How often do I watch porn? Not often?
Speaker 3 (34:29):
Once a month, once a week.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Maybe once a month, for how long?
Speaker 3 (34:35):
How long each sitting? Just carry?
Speaker 2 (34:38):
I don't I don't know. Do I usually don't finish?
Speaker 3 (34:42):
I was gonna say, do you uh do you handle
yourself while you're watching porn? Just be honest. I mean,
it's like it's a natural, it's a human thing.
Speaker 5 (34:52):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
Usually it's when I'm driving. No, I'm kidding, No, No.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
I.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
Sitting next to you in traffic. Oh jesus.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I don't know how long I watch.
Speaker 3 (35:04):
It for until you don't need to watch it anymore,
until the until you are satisfied. Right maybe, Oh my god? Okay,
has that thought of me? Just fine? It's yeah, it's
making me uncomfortable, which is hard to do.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
Is it really? Did you want me to tell you
some more?
Speaker 3 (35:23):
No, here's mine, here's mine, okay, And then two a
couple other things, and then we're done.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Reveal Reveal which person in the room has the worst
fashion sense and why? Or dare text your esque, text
your ex asking for money or drink or drink?
Speaker 3 (35:46):
Yes, oh that's mine.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Yeah, that's course.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
Well. I love Claire's fashion sense, even though like she
comes to work in her brgin is because she goes
right to bed, because she wakes up at oh dark
thirty every morning for work. So but I know when
she does it up, she's super cute and has a
great style.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
But I look loudily during the show though, Oh.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Do you dare me? Do you dare me to text
an X and ask, oh you know what X? I
should text? Oh yeah, but I kind of don't want to.
This guy has money.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Oh no, no, not no, no, I'm not going to
text an X anything.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
No, No, I'm I'm like, you have to drink, all right,
I'm gonna drink Oh my god, let me drink. Mean,
I'm gonna drink the concoction.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
I think I'm gonna make her drink the concoccion.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
You got to do that.
Speaker 4 (36:48):
Horrific like a sedimentary layer.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Oh my god, it's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (36:53):
It almost smells fishy. But I didn't put any fish
anything else there. Duh.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Okay here, god.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Oh my god, I can smell it from here. One two?
Oh my god, that is horrible.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
Is so gross.
Speaker 3 (37:19):
Okay, now we're just gonna do a couple of little things,
little little little things. Who is most likely to get
fired from their current job, whoever is, whoever we decide
has to drink. I might as well just fucking.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
Drink right.
Speaker 3 (37:37):
Here we go. It's not going to be clear, and
it's definitely not gonna be you. Eric, I'm on the
razor's edge.
Speaker 4 (37:45):
God.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
That oh just smells disgusting.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Oh, oh my god. Who's most likely to crash their car?
Probably me? Yes, Claire, drink.
Speaker 4 (38:07):
I'm not a very good driver.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
You're not.
Speaker 4 (38:09):
I mean, I like I earnestly, trynestly.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
You are distracted.
Speaker 4 (38:15):
No, I I just I don't think I'm I'm scared
that I'm not good at it.
Speaker 3 (38:20):
Drink Okay, Oh, you're drinking the cocota.
Speaker 4 (38:24):
I'm going to do the concoct.
Speaker 3 (38:25):
Okay, go for it, go for it.
Speaker 2 (38:27):
Let's just make it. Oh oh Claire, oh god, oh honey,
your face, oh little.
Speaker 4 (38:38):
I don't know, did something.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
Most likely to leave the house without underwear drink.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Oh oh god.
Speaker 3 (38:50):
Don't fake it. Take a sip. Honestly, you can do it.
Come on, little tiny shit, little tiny, little tiny little tin.
H Okay, we'll do too, we'll do we'll do three more.
Most likely to not shower for a week, flair, you're
(39:15):
lounding yourself. Wow, I'm sorry. It's okay. I respect that,
you know what. It's all good.
Speaker 4 (39:22):
Listen, they can't smell you through the radio.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
There was a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (39:26):
I'm gonna give Claria box of sweetems.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
He should because you can get your hot spots with
that and not have to show the So what, which
do you prefer themato or the concoc which I think
is worse. It's worse.
Speaker 4 (39:40):
The concoction is worse.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
So anyway, go for it your choice. Concoction. I'm a
good sport.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Oh my god, oh.
Speaker 4 (39:51):
The second sip is worse.
Speaker 3 (39:53):
No, it is it totally is most likely to sell
a sex tape, for sure.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
We just had this whole conversation.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
Oh, but he's gonna smell so bad. Oh my god. Okay,
most likely to go back to their ex drink, Oh, Eric,
I think probably Laura.
Speaker 4 (40:21):
Right, I've never I've never ever done that.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Oh I'm starting to not feel good in my tummy.
Things are like things are. No, I don't throw up.
I told you I never do.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Oh my god.
Speaker 4 (40:41):
And it has an additive effect. It gets worse, it.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
Does, it does, it compounds, it gets worse. And finally,
who's most likely to get a sugar daddy? Bring it on? Concoction?
Here she goes, you could do one more. It's one more,
one more? You got this to take a chug? There
(41:05):
we go. Ah, we did it. We did it. We
played a drinking game with no alcohol. I'm proud of us.
It was disgusting. We had a fun time.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
And now gross.
Speaker 3 (41:17):
Something that isn't gross. Something that is extremely fancy and beautiful,
the old globe, glassy and wonderful and a gem.
Speaker 2 (41:26):
That would never serve a concoction like that in their.
Speaker 3 (41:28):
Little bar eever, And they have a cool little bar.
They have a great little concession stand. They do. They
have a lot of fun little things. It's the Old Globe.
We're talking about the Old Globe Theater. Yeah, in Double
Park still has this our face. We have a lot
of shows at the Old Globe this season. They have
(41:51):
Kim's Convenience is currently is running starting on the Wait
what's today? The eleven starts on the fifteen guys, and
then the omber starts on the thirtieth. Measure for measure,
there's our Shakespeare. That's on June fourteenth, north by northwest, sirrah,
no much ado about nothing, and then begin again. That's
the musical.
Speaker 4 (42:11):
Today is the fourteenth, So it starts.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
Tomorrow today see eleventh.
Speaker 4 (42:16):
Oh oh, that's right on the day that this is released.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Today that this is released. Oh oh, it starts tomorrow. Yeah,
Friday night, yesterday night, Oh, date night. Okay, Old Globe
is where it's at. Go see a live show. Take
your your lover, your honey, your best friend, your soul man,
your side piece, your side piece. Go six one nine
two three four five six two three.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
Or go online to Theoldglobe dot org.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
And you'll thank us later, you totally will, and uh
thank you so much for listening, and uh thank you
for being cool with us being off next week we
will have many stories. Oh yes we will following week,
lots of things going on and.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
Uh and I would like those of you who listen
and watch, Laura's going to get a nice, big surprise
because her birthday is coming up. And we're going to
do when we get back, eat this or drink this,
not that. So if you guys would like to DM
me with some concoctions that I can make for our
(43:21):
fearless leader, please send them in. Oh boy, and I
will be happy to make.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Our listeners are creative and there they are. They are
honest and they will not let you down and listen.
Speaker 2 (43:36):
Who wouldn't want to see Laura digest one of your recipes?
Speaker 3 (43:40):
Oh god, it's so bad. He blindfolds me. I can't
see what I'm eating. It's horrible. It's like, way more
horrible than anything, but hopefully funny. Anyway, Wow, what a week,
so monumental. I love it. I love you guys. Thanks
for watching and thanks for listening, and thanks for some
supporting us. I love you, I love.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
You, I love you, Claire you. We love you, guys.
Thanks for watching and listening and supporting us.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Love your podcast, Love your podcast. I love you, my
sweet babies. I can't wait to see you. Bye guys, Bye,
Lara Kane after Dark with Eric remembers of podcast You're
dig If you like a genuine and left so big.
Laura's a love of ballunatic with a vive so brial.
The stories are crazy, the real deal. Eric's the talent
and people with says he's kind. Hell le me get
some kind of crass purtas are Claire runs the show
Susper plain nerd always in the note we guarantee to
(00:21):
make you laugh.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
Plus sure we're late. Bumble your seat belts and don't
be late. Here we go. Get ready, it'll be great
on with the show.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Okay, hey, everybody, welcome to Loura Kane after Dark. This
is a very exciting day because it's our last show
for a week. Because we all three, it just so happens,
are going to different locations on trips for different reasons
(00:51):
and it's I am beyond excited. I'm emotional, and I'm
going to see my daughter graduate from college. I have
something I wrote for her. I don't want to show you.
Some things that I'm going to present to her for gifts. Okay,
Eric is going to Seattle with his one of his besties, Karen.
(01:16):
We're going to spend a lot of solo time together
and bonding time, which is beautiful and great. But I'm
a little I am jealous. I'm jealous. I'm just I'm jealous. Okay, sorry,
can you deal with that? I can? Do you understand?
Speaker 2 (01:30):
I do?
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Okay, Claire is going to be let's see, let's pick
it is stan Bull? Is there a reason we picked
Istanbul as a family trip?
Speaker 4 (01:47):
Honestly, I'm just along for the ride.
Speaker 3 (01:50):
Do you know why your parents picked that? Just because
there were there were a.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
Number of places. It was one of a number of
places that was sort of tossed around.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Have they ever been before?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
That's been Oh but.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We haven't all been together.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Okay, are you staying in a nice hotel?
Speaker 4 (02:08):
I hope so. Frankly, I know nothing. Could I be
so serious?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
But is that on purpose?
Speaker 5 (02:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
I'm just like along for the ride. I'm just like,
I just work here. It's kind of great.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I think that's actually a fine way to do this.
Speaker 4 (02:21):
Like, I know the flight I need to get on
right and then after.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
That, okay, you also need to go. You need to
know the weather.
Speaker 4 (02:30):
Yes, I know that.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
Okay, Oh god, Laura, what's the matter. I can smell that.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Okay, I'm gonna talk about that in a second. Oh
my god, we're wearing these big, giant, gaudy necklaces because
we are supporting FIFA. Are are We are a soccer
city now, a big time soccer city. Snap Dragon Stadium
is where we play and and this is the USA Eric. Yes,
(03:04):
And so my friend Maggie says, you guys really need
to embrace soccer because it's such a big part of
San Diego now. And it is and our soccer team
is incredible, so Go San Diego Football Club make a
lot of home runs. Oh my god, Okay, now I'm
gonna take this soft because it's like really choking me.
(03:25):
But this is really cool. We love soccer all right. Now,
before we play our drinking game, we're playing a drinking game,
and it's truth or dare or it's just or. There's
also questions who is the most likely too and whoever
we decide that person is has to drink. There are
(03:48):
two choices of drinks. Oh, there's clamato, which is tomato
juice mixed with oyster juice. Nope, okay, And then I
made a concoction that I thought was so horrific. It's
seven up, it's green juice, it's saracha sauce and soy sauce,
(04:12):
and I forgot there's one other element I put in there,
and I'm not sure, but it's gotta be terrible because
none of us drink. You're not a big drinker. Clear.
I know that you can drink, and you have had
cocktails and stuff, but you're not like a huge drinker.
Eric doesn't drink and I don't drink. So this is
how we're playing the drink.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
The fact that she doesn't remember the one ingredient that
she can't remember, I like, but.
Speaker 3 (04:37):
A dash of something weird. I forgot though, I totally forgot.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
You do know what this means?
Speaker 5 (04:43):
Though?
Speaker 6 (04:44):
What?
Speaker 3 (04:45):
No, you're not gonna puke, You're.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Gonna Besides that, what does it mean? You may want
to bring a bucket, But that means when we all
get back from vacation, Yeah, we're gonna do a little
number called Laura Caane Eat this not that.
Speaker 3 (05:03):
Oh gosh, have you have we played this with you?
Speaker 4 (05:06):
Yes, very early on early first.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
I'm gonna be on vacation, Claire. I will be able
to think of lots of things. There might be drink
this not that.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
Oh god, well, Claire, did we tell you about the
one time he I'm blindfolded when he feeds me these
mysterious items. One of the things I put in my
mouth felt like soft like feathers, and I wasn't I
was like, what is this? It was his hair from
(05:43):
down there? No, yes, it was.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
He did a little man's skate and.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Put it in a little cup and I put it
in my mouth.
Speaker 6 (05:52):
No.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
So yeah, that's how this game goes sometimes. So it's
really not that fun for me. It's funny straight up.
Speaker 4 (06:04):
If someone did that to me, I'd never forgive them
and we wouldn't be friends.
Speaker 3 (06:07):
I know you guys have something.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
You really are lovely.
Speaker 3 (06:10):
I have a great friend, but I still you know what,
you know what, it's unconditional for me.
Speaker 2 (06:16):
Oh my god, Now that you've brought it to the
attention of producer Claire and her reaction, you know what,
I will look at your vagina. Really, I figure it's
the least I can do.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
I have a very small vagina, just so you know, Like, so.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
I'm going to need a magnifying So it's not like.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
It's not obscene, it's not obtrusive, Like if I showed
it to you, you wouldn't go, oh my god, this
is a big, fat giant Oh so it's all tucked
in there, it's all nice. It's not that big a deal.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
Can you put a little lipstick on it? It?
Speaker 3 (06:50):
Lets talk about my vagina's okay? Can we not? Can
we not?
Speaker 2 (06:55):
Like, you know, make it pretty.
Speaker 3 (06:58):
Okay before we get into the drinking game, which is
gonna go rowdy. I wanted to show you a couple
of things that I'm bringing to New York City to
give to Evan for her graduation. One of the things
is a piece of jewelry I'm having made for her.
I pick it up tomorrow. It's like, I spent a
lot of money on this and I saved up and
(07:18):
I be.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
Sure you don't want to sell that tomorrow too, you
know right, I have to believe it.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
But it's a bracelet and it has a little starfish
on it. And the starfish is significant because she when
she was little, believed with her whole heart that she
was from the sea, that she was a mermaid, and
that shed she she had a mermaid tale. She had
the whole thing she did, and she loved this movie.
(07:45):
I think it was called H two Oh yes, okay,
is that the one that has uh Emma Roberts in it.
Speaker 4 (07:52):
I think the Australian girls who can.
Speaker 3 (07:54):
Oh, yeah, the Australian girls. Okay, so it was or
Mako Mermaids. It was one of those kind of movies.
Speaker 4 (08:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
But the way that the ocean life communicate with mermaids
are starfish. You put starfish as earrings. Mermaids were these
little starfish earrings, and the little starfish talk to them
and give them advice and give them like positive words
of affirmation, and it's just so cute. So they stick
these little things on their ears. So it's it's significant
(08:23):
of her childhood and of her beliefs that she is
a mermaid and magical and it's going to be really cute.
So it's a little fourteen here gold, little dangly bracelet.
So anyway, that's like the big thing, and it wasn't
she I'm sure the.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
World thinks to me as a starfish sometimes because I
give you, I just tell you affirmations and no, you
don't positive things, yes, so you don't like, don't worry
about turning sixty two. You still look great.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
God, Claire, that wasn't funny this time?
Speaker 5 (08:54):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:55):
Is it getting old?
Speaker 5 (08:56):
Right?
Speaker 4 (08:57):
It's getting married?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
There we go, Hello, we only have another couple of weeks.
Speaker 4 (09:03):
Okay, and then it'll be sixty three, which would be
a whole new ball, a new space to play.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Then I made her one of these this is so cute,
which is like a little it's a it's a gallery.
It's like a little tiny like art gallery. And each
one of these little pictures I printed out and they
have meaning and there's like little people that are looking
at the gallery. And then you do this boom and
(09:28):
the lights come on on the little gallery. So it's
just a fun little thing that she is. It just
has meaningful pictures that she'll love. So that's one thing.
And then I took my polaroid camera and I went
around and I took pictures of all the things that
make her happy, and I put it in this little book.
And it starts off with a picture of San Diego
(09:52):
and then me and then Grandma Mary making rice and
meat which is our favorite meal. Flowers, the dogs, Marie
or roommate, you are in it, Ausy. This is a
picture of her and Charlie when they were little the
house I grew upon that that Evan believes she's gonna
(10:13):
buy someday. It's in Glendale, just like various pictures up.
Here's another one that me and you. She loves you
Hillcrest Sign and just like some just various places we've
gone and love. And so that's just this little photo
album thing me and then I'm going to read you
(10:33):
something because I'm so proud of her. She is I
was corrected. She's double majoring in communications in theater and
minoring in Spanish. God, and she was on the Dean's
list all the years she's been. Wow, I know she
(10:54):
is just she is so hard working. Her attitude is
so incredible. She's got the best, best attitude, and she's
just a magical being. And I'm so proud to be
her mom. And this is just so monumental.
Speaker 2 (11:11):
And it just shows how great of a mom you are,
because both your kids are amazing.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Okay, here we go to Evan Elizabeth. Twenty one years ago,
you arrived in the world with an opinion and you
haven't stopped sharing it since. Thank God. Here's what I
know about my daughter. She's the kind of person who
makes a room feel more alive just by walking into it.
She's sunshine in human form. She asked the questions other
(11:40):
people are too polite to ask, but she asks them politely.
She laughs loud, and she means every emotion she exudes.
She has a mind that cuts right through nonsense. She
is a bullshit spotter. She is sincere to the core
(12:00):
and authentic and appreciates that in other people. She has
a huge heart, big enough to make it feel like
it's a gift that you are given. Like any person
that meets Evan has spent time with Evan, you feel
better coming away from that meeting. Fordham gave her four years.
(12:24):
She gave it everything she had and still had enough
left over to worry about everything she loves, worry about me,
call me, FaceTime me her family, and hold down a
full time corporate position in her last semester of college. Evan,
I've watched you become somebody I incredibly admire, not only
(12:47):
as your parent, but as a person. You are smarter
than you were, brave and enough to believe when you started,
and braver than you ever gave yourself credit for. I
told you that you were gonna look back on these
last few months and go, Wow, how in the world
(13:08):
did I do that? Full time school, full time work,
subway rides to and from, living on her own, paying
her own rent. Like this girl is amazing. The world
does not know what's coming, but I do. Go get it. Baby.
(13:30):
I'm going to be right here crying obviously, but so proud.
And I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna
do when I see her walk across that stage. And
you have to take pictures, well, yes, be prepared for
an onslaught of videos and sappy uh sappie reels and
(13:55):
crying uh selfies with me explaining how I'm feeling at
the moment, because I like sharing things with you, guys,
and I know that you're with me, so I can't
wait to tell you all about it.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
I can't wait to hear it.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
We're gonna be gone next week, you guys, but we'll
be back in full effect the following week.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Lots of stories to tell.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
And I think my birthdays May twenty fourth, so when
we come back, I think, wait, when is my birthday?
What is it? What date? Does it lank? Is it
on if it's on a Sunday?
Speaker 2 (14:33):
No, it's on like a Wednesday. Or something, isn't it?
Or a mona?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Well, what do you guys have planned for my big
birthday podcast?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (14:43):
Oh so much?
Speaker 3 (14:46):
No, my birthday is on Sunday?
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Sunday?
Speaker 3 (14:50):
Well, well okay, so on the twenty Memorial Day? Do
you guys want to work Memorial Day? Are you okay
with that?
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Okay, we'll celebrate on Memorial Day. I don't know.
Speaker 4 (15:01):
I don't get holidays off from we have a job either,
so nor do I doesn't make a difference.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Same thing I'm off Memorial Day?
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Are good to come in here?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Yeah? Yeah, I mean that's your you know.
Speaker 4 (15:13):
Can you pencil us in? Can you pencil her in
for her birthday?
Speaker 2 (15:16):
For sure?
Speaker 4 (15:16):
You're very kind.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
It'll give me time to a dollar.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Will you guys do something fun for me? Can you
surprise me? I love surprises? You do I expect something?
I expect something. I expect something from you guys, some
kind of like decoration or the decoration in your house. Yes,
you can bring or or maybe a little speech, maybe
(15:44):
a poem. I don't know anything. It doesn't have to
cost money.
Speaker 2 (15:47):
A lot of us.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Does not have to cost you. It has to cost money. Okay,
I'm not kidding, and I don't want anything from the team,
but you already said you got me something.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I did?
Speaker 3 (15:58):
Okay, I did. Oh, I'll be not at well, you know,
I'll be grateful for whatever you give me, but I
beat down. I'll be disappointed if it's from the dollar Tree.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
Do you honestly think? Do you think I would get
you a gift from the dollar Tree?
Speaker 6 (16:14):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:15):
Oh, that gift is going back?
Speaker 3 (16:19):
All right, guys, no play some sort of like music.
I don't even care.
Speaker 2 (16:24):
I'm I'm gonna throw up.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
So there we go. Here we go. This is the
ultimate game. We're playing a drinking game. I don't know.
You've got some moves, right, she's doing the isolated.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I've taken a theater class. I'm a strong mover. I
can isolate my shoulders.
Speaker 3 (16:45):
Oh wait, we're gonna start taking pole dancing classes.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Oh yeah, for real, for real. My friend who does
it is has invited me, and I'm gonna.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
Can you bring friends?
Speaker 3 (16:56):
Can you explain the situation to her?
Speaker 4 (16:59):
I think I'm the d It's like a friend discount thing.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
Well, so I don't care about discounts, but like to
tell her that we want to like.
Speaker 4 (17:07):
I'll go I'll do the first one and I'll report
back and I'll tell you if we should invest.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
Okay, why can't I come with you the first time?
I guess I don't. You don't know. I don't, but
I don't. But I will pay full price, like I
don't care. I'll speak coming as your friend. I won't
expect a discount.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Okay, I'll ask them, But I think we should.
Speaker 3 (17:24):
Experience this together first. That's at And I want to
know if there is a performance at the end of
the classes that we will be taking. Yeah, because if so,
I'm thinking Laura kne after dark party with listeners and
the performance with my Sturfer song. Oh yeah, it's gonna
(17:47):
be amazing on you. You can do that, oh totally
all day long? Okay, all right, So Claire, you've got
your two choices of drinks, which are hideous. We've got
ours over here, and we'll start off with truth or dare. Okay, Okay, now, Claire,
(18:12):
we're starting with you.
Speaker 5 (18:13):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (18:17):
Now you have to either answer the truth or do
the dare. If you don't do either, you drink. Okay, truth,
how many people have you slept with? Or dare? Do
a freestyle wrap for thirty seconds, which do you choose
(18:40):
or take a sip, drink.
Speaker 4 (18:43):
The nasty juice of the nasty juice. My mom's on
the internet.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
I'll do how many people believe you slept with? Or
do a rap freestyle rap.
Speaker 4 (18:51):
I'm going to do a freestyle rap.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
I'm so excited.
Speaker 4 (18:53):
Oh my god, someone's got to give me a beat.
Speaker 7 (18:56):
Okay, boom boom boom boom boom boom, Yeah boom boom.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
Oh no, boom boo.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
Bora average ala together making the podcast. They're gonna make
a big They're gonna go to Hollywood and get famous,
and then they're gonna make this into a movie.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
All right. I love where that way. All right, so
you were spared the drinking Eric, You're eitherna have to
answer the truth question or do the dare and the
dare I have a feeling you're gonna be drinking God,
oh truth, reveal honestly, your first impression of the person
(19:57):
to your left is that me, or suck the toe
of the person in the room, either one of us
for fifteen seconds.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
All truth.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
It super easy, and I want you to be dead serious, Okay,
even if it won't hurt my feelings because I know
where we stand now, But what was your first impression
of me when you met me?
Speaker 2 (20:25):
Easy? I thought you were so vulnerable and funny and kind,
and you spoke.
Speaker 3 (20:37):
Your truth, nothing but the things.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
No.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
I fell in love with you like the minute. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (20:45):
Did you think I was cute? Yeah? I thought you
were in person?
Speaker 4 (20:48):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (20:49):
Did you think I thought you were much prettier in
person than you photograph?
Speaker 3 (20:53):
Thank you? I was going to say, did I look
like you thought I was going to live?
Speaker 4 (20:59):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Okay, hmm, thank you? All good? All right? So okay,
so now here's me.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Let me read it for you, okay, Laura Kane. Yes, truth,
Reveal the thing you would do if it was illegal,
if it was legal. Reveal the thing you would do
if it was legal. Okay, oh I see Okay. Or
dare call the person you fancy and ask them and
(21:26):
tell them you have been thinking of their peachy arts.
Then hang up.
Speaker 3 (21:30):
They're British, this is British.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Mm hmm. Truth. Reveal the thing you would do if
it was legal. Dare call the person you fancy and
ask them if you have been and tell them you
have been thinking of their ass. Then hang up.
Speaker 3 (21:51):
I want to do that one. But I'm trying to
think who I fancy. Should I do a Hantson again? No,
I can't believe.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Oh god, he's gonna think you're insane.
Speaker 3 (22:03):
No, no, he will, he totally will.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Uh.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
I can't do the other one. How about, Oh.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
I guess you're just gonna have to drink then, no,
well there's no other alternative.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
Let me look up something on my phone. Meney no
no no no no no no no no no no
no no no no no no.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
No, let him go, Eenie mean miney mo, here we go.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
No no no no no no no no no no
no no no no no no no no no no.
I am going to No, actually, I'm going to go
through my phone and I'm going to Uh, I'm going
to look up somebody, and I'm going to the first
person that I see that's a dude. No. Yes, if
my phone rings, it's like going to be you. How
(22:53):
about oh my god, oh my, oh Sam Bass, poor
Sam Bass, dead Sam Bass. He used to be on
the radio. He was a great guy. Ben Fletcher is married.
I wouldn't do that to him. How about, uh, I
know there's somebody coming up that Oh okay, okay, am
(23:19):
I up. Yes, I'm gonna call former DSc member Chris Boyer.
Oh boy, I always thought he was kind of cute.
Speaker 5 (23:40):
Decide to take my offer. Chris Boyer, Yes, ma'am.
Speaker 3 (23:47):
You're on Laura Cane after Dark right now.
Speaker 5 (23:50):
That is fantastic. I know I'm gonna disappoint you.
Speaker 3 (23:54):
No, you're not, because here's the deal. We're playing truth
or dare. We're playing a game, but obviously with things
that aren't alcoholic that are really atrocious. So the dare
is I have to call somebody I fancy and tell
them that I missed their sweet ass. So Chris Boyer,
(24:15):
I missed your sweet ass.
Speaker 5 (24:17):
Wow. Well that's four hundred dollars in it for you
if you come through.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Can I tell them about the four hundred dollars?
Speaker 5 (24:24):
Yes? Do you want to review the negotiation?
Speaker 3 (24:26):
Yes? About a year? This is a year ago or
two years ago?
Speaker 5 (24:32):
About two years ago? I don't know when. When When
were you really desperate?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Uh? This afternoon I was really desperate. This is about
a year and a half ago. I think we've been
friends since, like I started in radio, even though we
were on compete competing.
Speaker 5 (24:56):
Oh my god, it is when we worked in the
same building.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
We were the top morning shows DSc and the Jeff
Andnger Show. But we were all friends, like the DC
family and especially being Chris. So he says to me
one day, he goes, Hey, if you want to come over,
here's I'll give you four hundred dollars for an hour,
(25:20):
and all we have to do is have sex you.
We had parameters, right, well, it was an hour's worth
of time, right, and.
Speaker 5 (25:30):
I was going to allow you to take the shower
time out of the hour.
Speaker 3 (25:36):
He was dead serious. He sent me a picture of
four hundred dollars.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Splay it out, Chris. This screams like a sequel to
Pretty Woman.
Speaker 5 (25:46):
You'll call it ugly, old man.
Speaker 3 (25:47):
I know, but here's the deal. Things have changed. The
four hundred dollars still is out there for the taken,
but the parameters have changed.
Speaker 5 (26:00):
Yeah, because I told her. I said, I don't want
to renegotiate at the time, either ninety minutes or two hours.
And I promise you I can still bring it.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Chris, what area do do you live in?
Speaker 5 (26:11):
I live in San Diego, California.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Oh so he's close close. What are you what are
you waiting for?
Speaker 3 (26:17):
I know, right, I need money for New York.
Speaker 5 (26:19):
I was waiting for her to say yes because I
had set aside the money. It was going to be
two hundred for the hour. And let's see, I was
going to allow fifteen minutes for a shower inside the hour,
paid for by me, paid for by me. It was
(26:40):
going to be, and it was going to be seven
dollars an hour for overtime. I'm sorry, seven dollars a
minute for overtime.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
Yeah, it was a good deal. I should have taken
him up on the offer when I had, when I had.
Speaker 2 (26:51):
With that include cuddling up with her on the couch
and watching a couple episodes of ninety de Fiance.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
No, this is all no no, no, no, no, no no no.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
This is all just bony.
Speaker 3 (27:00):
As is all boning. And now the time has expanded.
Now I have to Now it's an hour and a half.
Speaker 5 (27:06):
Yeah, you're gonna have to suffer at least ninety minutes
on this one, sweetheart, because look, you know, I mean.
Speaker 3 (27:12):
Do we make out? Do we have to make out
a lot? Is it kidding? A kissing?
Speaker 5 (27:19):
You never kiss your hooker?
Speaker 3 (27:23):
Okay, I would rather not be referred to as a hooker.
I think this is a different circumstance. Even though I
am being paid, I'm technically am a prostitute.
Speaker 5 (27:35):
But I mean what we all are. Let's face it,
we all are right.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Right, Listen, I have a I have a way to
settle this. What if he films it, you'd just be
a porn star.
Speaker 5 (27:48):
You and I think somebody else would have to pay her.
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Yeah, we're not feeling like that's the deal.
Speaker 5 (27:56):
That's the deal. Well, I'd have to find, you know,
some shoot girl, because I want to I want some
other guy checking out my ball sack while I'm trying to,
you know, get my stroke on. So yeah, we'd have
to find one of those lady production houses, uh, you know,
the the cat house sensitive porn interactions or something that.
Speaker 3 (28:18):
Adds another one hundred dollars on top. So that's a
five hundred dollars deal there, now, Chris, Okay, let.
Speaker 5 (28:24):
Me put it. If it's five hundred, do I get
the Do I get the rights to it?
Speaker 3 (28:29):
Oh, we'd have to negotiate that. I think we'd have
to split that.
Speaker 5 (28:35):
Uh we're going to be split in something.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
That's for sure, split in some weight.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
You want the same cut on intellectual property. I'll chat
with my attorney.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Happen now, Chris, I will tell you this. I am
willing to take my time. You don't even need to
pay me to shoot it, because listen, I've seen a
lot of balls. I mean, I.
Speaker 5 (28:57):
Feeling that you sound like a guy who might.
Speaker 2 (28:59):
Have a lot of time.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
So judge, he would not.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
I would not be judge, Judy.
Speaker 5 (29:06):
Yeah, you've probably, you know, taken more balls off the
chin than Hank Aaron.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Probably. Yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:14):
The only thing is I want to see my vagina.
That's the only problem.
Speaker 5 (29:18):
Yeah, well, uh, you know what. I don't think you
need to see any of it. I mean, okay, he can,
he can see the finished project, and I'm okay with that.
But I see.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Right, okay, Well all right, Chris, that's still up in
the air. And thank you for sending me again the
picture of the four hundred dollars last listen.
Speaker 5 (29:39):
I just want to remind you, you know what, everything
in life is sales, and I'm just looking to close
the deal.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
Oh wow, yes, all right, And.
Speaker 5 (29:48):
Every woman has a price. Listen, don't be fooled. Every woman,
every person has a price. You're not lying after that price.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
You're not live.
Speaker 5 (29:57):
I had a who wrote a you know, a paper
one time? Right, what would you what would you charge
to lick a donkey's tee teeth? Pee? Yeah, open the
mouth and give the teeth a good licking. I mean
there's a certain element of risk, yes, and there's a
(30:17):
certain element of shame. So what's your price? Right?
Speaker 3 (30:20):
I mean what did you say?
Speaker 5 (30:21):
Everybody's I just I didn't reply.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
My price would be I do it for five grand?
Speaker 5 (30:31):
I think, yeah, I think you can find somebody who
who would do it for last?
Speaker 3 (30:35):
How about it I do it for fifteen hundred?
Speaker 5 (30:38):
Yes? Ah, boy? Would I do it for fourteen?
Speaker 4 (30:42):
Like?
Speaker 5 (30:42):
And you got to go one hundred dollars increment? Right?
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (30:45):
So otherwise you just nikkel and dying yourself down to zero?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
Okay?
Speaker 5 (30:48):
How about fourteen hundred?
Speaker 2 (30:51):
Okay, listen, Chris, I've done a lot more for a
kad cat bar and it's been far worse.
Speaker 5 (30:57):
Right, Well, you know what, you bring a zagnut into
the pay sure, and now you're talking my language.
Speaker 2 (31:01):
There we go.
Speaker 5 (31:03):
I gotta tell you, I don't know twelve fifty? How
about twelve day?
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Stop talking me down?
Speaker 3 (31:08):
No, I'm sticking hard at fifteen hundred and that's it.
Speaker 5 (31:12):
Yeah, I don't think I'm interested. I got to get
a donkey and it's a lot of work.
Speaker 3 (31:17):
Yeah, I gotta get by.
Speaker 2 (31:19):
I'll take her down to TJ. There's plenty of donkeys
down there.
Speaker 3 (31:22):
Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness.
Speaker 5 (31:24):
Right wearing the hat. Yeah, and they're all striped like
a zebra. I don't I don't know what that means.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Zebra.
Speaker 5 (31:31):
And then of course these the the lucky donkeys also
get to work the donkey show too.
Speaker 3 (31:37):
Oh, let's not even go into that realm. But anyway, Chris,
thank you for now. I don't have to drink because
I did my dare, which was calling you.
Speaker 5 (31:46):
See it sounds like you're It sounds like you're blowing
me off.
Speaker 2 (31:49):
I am blowing your sea gets she gets off at nine.
Speaker 5 (31:53):
You know what if you if you just want to
blow me, that's fine too.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
How much is that going to be? How much?
Speaker 5 (31:59):
Well, so the stick don't suck itself? So what's the
what's it worth?
Speaker 3 (32:04):
I don't know. I don't even knowing what's the going right?
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (32:10):
I don't either. You know what I think if a
guy's getting if a guy's paying two hundred bucks to
get his knob gob that's pretty generous. I think.
Speaker 2 (32:18):
Yeah, I'm let's let's for two hundred. Let's do.
Speaker 5 (32:24):
He list, Laura what I'm good with two hundred.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
I do have a problem with my teeth, though, there
is there's an issue with my because I have big
teeth and they sometimes get in the way.
Speaker 5 (32:36):
Oh what if I wore a teflon condom?
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I guess that would work? My God, Chris, we can't
go down this rabbit hole. All right, we gotta go.
Speaker 5 (32:47):
There's plenty of holes we can go down.
Speaker 3 (32:51):
Okay, I love you mean it in a couple of hours.
Thanks for answering, by God. Okay, back, shut up, all right, Claire? Yeah,
truth or dare truth? Reveal your favorite sexual fantasy or
(33:14):
dare text the last person you texted asking if they
know where the condoms are?
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Okay, the internet's not ready for my sexual fantasies. Everyone's
got to get cool with a lot of things really quickly.
The last person I texted was my sister.
Speaker 3 (33:31):
Okay, well text her? Do you want to text hers
to ask her what the condoms are? No?
Speaker 4 (33:34):
I don't.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
I'm gonna be Okay, where you going I'm gonna of this. Okay,
here we go our first drink. Oh my god, oh
my god, Oh my god, my god. Oh I got up?
Oh nice? Oh see she's so stoic. Oh okay, Eric
truth be honest? Either, how often do you watch porn?
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (34:01):
Or dare post an ugly picture of yourself on your
Instagram story right now, answer this question about porn. How
often do you watch it? To be honest, or do
the dare or drink?
Speaker 2 (34:21):
Oh? Hell no? How often do I watch porn? Not often?
Speaker 3 (34:29):
Once a month, once a week.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Maybe once a month, for how long?
Speaker 3 (34:35):
How long each sitting? Just carry?
Speaker 2 (34:38):
I don't I don't know. Do I usually don't finish?
Speaker 3 (34:42):
I was gonna say, do you uh do you handle
yourself while you're watching porn? Just be honest. I mean,
it's like it's a natural, it's a human thing.
Speaker 5 (34:52):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
Usually it's when I'm driving. No, I'm kidding, No, No.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
I.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
Sitting next to you in traffic. Oh jesus.
Speaker 2 (35:02):
I don't know how long I watch.
Speaker 3 (35:04):
It for until you don't need to watch it anymore,
until the until you are satisfied. Right maybe, Oh my god? Okay,
has that thought of me? Just fine? It's yeah, it's
making me uncomfortable, which is hard to do.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
Is it really? Did you want me to tell you
some more?
Speaker 3 (35:23):
No, here's mine, here's mine, okay, And then two a
couple other things, and then we're done.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Reveal Reveal which person in the room has the worst
fashion sense and why? Or dare text your esque, text
your ex asking for money or drink or drink?
Speaker 3 (35:46):
Yes, oh that's mine.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
Yeah, that's course.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
Well. I love Claire's fashion sense, even though like she
comes to work in her brgin is because she goes
right to bed, because she wakes up at oh dark
thirty every morning for work. So but I know when
she does it up, she's super cute and has a
great style.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
But I look loudily during the show though, Oh.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Do you dare me? Do you dare me to text
an X and ask, oh you know what X? I
should text? Oh yeah, but I kind of don't want to.
This guy has money.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Oh no, no, not no, no, I'm not going to
text an X anything.
Speaker 3 (36:35):
No, No, I'm I'm like, you have to drink, all right,
I'm gonna drink Oh my god, let me drink. Mean,
I'm gonna drink the concoction.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
I think I'm gonna make her drink the concoccion.
Speaker 3 (36:46):
You got to do that.
Speaker 4 (36:48):
Horrific like a sedimentary layer.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
Oh my god, it's disgusting.
Speaker 3 (36:53):
It almost smells fishy. But I didn't put any fish
anything else there. Duh.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
Okay here, god.
Speaker 3 (37:01):
Oh my god, I can smell it from here. One two?
Oh my god, that is horrible.
Speaker 2 (37:16):
Is so gross.
Speaker 3 (37:19):
Okay, now we're just gonna do a couple of little things,
little little little things. Who is most likely to get
fired from their current job, whoever is, whoever we decide
has to drink. I might as well just fucking.
Speaker 2 (37:34):
Drink right.
Speaker 3 (37:37):
Here we go. It's not going to be clear, and
it's definitely not gonna be you. Eric, I'm on the
razor's edge.
Speaker 4 (37:45):
God.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
That oh just smells disgusting.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Oh, oh my god. Who's most likely to crash their car?
Probably me? Yes, Claire, drink.
Speaker 4 (38:07):
I'm not a very good driver.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
You're not.
Speaker 4 (38:09):
I mean, I like I earnestly, trynestly.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
You are distracted.
Speaker 4 (38:15):
No, I I just I don't think I'm I'm scared
that I'm not good at it.
Speaker 3 (38:20):
Drink Okay, Oh, you're drinking the cocota.
Speaker 4 (38:24):
I'm going to do the concoct.
Speaker 3 (38:25):
Okay, go for it, go for it.
Speaker 2 (38:27):
Let's just make it. Oh oh Claire, oh god, oh honey,
your face, oh little.
Speaker 4 (38:38):
I don't know, did something.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
Most likely to leave the house without underwear drink.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
Oh oh god.
Speaker 3 (38:50):
Don't fake it. Take a sip. Honestly, you can do it.
Come on, little tiny shit, little tiny, little tiny little tin.
H Okay, we'll do too, we'll do we'll do three more.
Most likely to not shower for a week, flair, you're
(39:15):
lounding yourself. Wow, I'm sorry. It's okay. I respect that,
you know what. It's all good.
Speaker 4 (39:22):
Listen, they can't smell you through the radio.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
There was a beautiful thing.
Speaker 2 (39:26):
I'm gonna give Claria box of sweetems.
Speaker 3 (39:29):
He should because you can get your hot spots with
that and not have to show the So what, which
do you prefer themato or the concoc which I think
is worse. It's worse.
Speaker 4 (39:40):
The concoction is worse.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
So anyway, go for it your choice. Concoction. I'm a
good sport.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
Oh my god, oh.
Speaker 4 (39:51):
The second sip is worse.
Speaker 3 (39:53):
No, it is it totally is most likely to sell
a sex tape, for sure.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
We just had this whole conversation.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
Oh, but he's gonna smell so bad. Oh my god. Okay,
most likely to go back to their ex drink, Oh, Eric,
I think probably Laura.
Speaker 4 (40:21):
Right, I've never I've never ever done that.
Speaker 3 (40:25):
Oh I'm starting to not feel good in my tummy.
Things are like things are. No, I don't throw up.
I told you I never do.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Oh my god.
Speaker 4 (40:41):
And it has an additive effect. It gets worse, it.
Speaker 3 (40:44):
Does, it does, it compounds, it gets worse. And finally,
who's most likely to get a sugar daddy? Bring it on? Concoction?
Here she goes, you could do one more. It's one more,
one more? You got this to take a chug? There
(41:05):
we go. Ah, we did it. We did it. We
played a drinking game with no alcohol. I'm proud of us.
It was disgusting. We had a fun time.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
And now gross.
Speaker 3 (41:17):
Something that isn't gross. Something that is extremely fancy and beautiful,
the old globe, glassy and wonderful and a gem.
Speaker 2 (41:26):
That would never serve a concoction like that in their.
Speaker 3 (41:28):
Little bar eever, And they have a cool little bar.
They have a great little concession stand. They do. They
have a lot of fun little things. It's the Old Globe.
We're talking about the Old Globe Theater. Yeah, in Double
Park still has this our face. We have a lot
of shows at the Old Globe this season. They have
(41:51):
Kim's Convenience is currently is running starting on the Wait
what's today? The eleven starts on the fifteen guys, and
then the omber starts on the thirtieth. Measure for measure,
there's our Shakespeare. That's on June fourteenth, north by northwest, sirrah,
no much ado about nothing, and then begin again. That's
the musical.
Speaker 4 (42:11):
Today is the fourteenth, So it starts.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
Tomorrow today see eleventh.
Speaker 4 (42:16):
Oh oh, that's right on the day that this is released.
Speaker 3 (42:18):
Today that this is released. Oh oh, it starts tomorrow. Yeah,
Friday night, yesterday night, Oh, date night. Okay, Old Globe
is where it's at. Go see a live show. Take
your your lover, your honey, your best friend, your soul man,
your side piece, your side piece. Go six one nine
two three four five six two three.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
Or go online to Theoldglobe dot org.
Speaker 3 (42:43):
And you'll thank us later, you totally will, and uh
thank you so much for listening, and uh thank you
for being cool with us being off next week we
will have many stories. Oh yes we will following week,
lots of things going on and.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
Uh and I would like those of you who listen
and watch, Laura's going to get a nice, big surprise
because her birthday is coming up. And we're going to
do when we get back, eat this or drink this,
not that. So if you guys would like to DM
me with some concoctions that I can make for our
(43:21):
fearless leader, please send them in. Oh boy, and I
will be happy to make.
Speaker 3 (43:27):
Our listeners are creative and there they are. They are
honest and they will not let you down and listen.
Speaker 2 (43:36):
Who wouldn't want to see Laura digest one of your recipes?
Speaker 3 (43:40):
Oh god, it's so bad. He blindfolds me. I can't
see what I'm eating. It's horrible. It's like, way more
horrible than anything, but hopefully funny. Anyway, Wow, what a week,
so monumental. I love it. I love you guys. Thanks
for watching and thanks for listening, and thanks for some
supporting us. I love you, I love.
Speaker 2 (44:02):
You, I love you, Claire you. We love you, guys.
Thanks for watching and listening and supporting us.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
Love your podcast, Love your podcast. I love you, my
sweet babies. I can't wait to see you. Bye guys, Bye,
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