June 13, 2025 • 37 mins
Before we launch into Laura’s love life, she kicks things off with a bold confession …she cut her cheek by shaving her face in the shower. Is she the only woman who does this? The show spirals into chaos when Laura tells the story about her streaming host gig that almost made her run away while on camera. Laura receives a tarot card reading at a street fair in Upland. The cards reveal an exciting prediction: she’s set to find love in just four months! This revelation sparks a funny discussion about dating younger men, with the boys sharing their scathing and blunt opinions about what young guys want and if she has it. Erik has an epic fall outside a grocery store that could have gone viral if someone was videoing it! He also teases us with hints about a surprise guest he’s booked for the show. But, Producer Bryan steps in to veto it immediately. You need to see why! Tune in for a blend of laughter, teasing and a dash of mysticism in this unforgettable episode! Love your podcast!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Can you see my oh hill, what's up? Everybody? Thank
you for tuning in to Laura Kane after Dark. I'm
Laura Kane. Remember this handsome devil over here?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
You sexy little thing?
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Oh my god. And then we have producer Brian who's
about to puke in his mouth a little bit.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
No, I've gotten used to.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
You just have a bucket that you just puke into.
Do you like get cringe?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Do you like that?
Speaker 3 (00:37):
You guys?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Do you like that?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
What is that? Is it?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
No? I was scratching at my between my eyebrows. Why
I don't know it? Itched?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Do you like this? Do you see this?
Speaker 2 (00:49):
What?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
What's that? Spider bike?
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Nope?
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Oh it's like swollen too.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Yes, I want you to guess what the flea bite?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
How I got this something with your advanced age of
sixty five?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
No, I got punched. No, wait, it's actually it looks
pretty swollen.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I know what is that?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
Because it wouldn't stop bleeding.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Did you cut yourself shaving?
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Yes? I shave?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Oh all the way up there?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Is that? Are you joking?
Speaker 1 (01:22):
My hairs are getting.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Longer, longer beard? Oh?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
And I have like a little like light flesh colored
mole right here, and I just shaved it right off
by accident, and it would not stop bleeding. Oh my god,
it's pressing on it, pressing on it, pressing on it.
So now it looks like I got out of prison,
like I killed something bad.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
It's the most hilarious like I've ever heard. I was
totally joking when I said it.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I shave my feet. Oh my god, I just I
put shaven cream on and I just shave it.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Oh my god, that is amazing.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Let me give you a friendly suggestion, just keep that
to yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
God women do that.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
Not I'm aware, but the where you cut yourself.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
I shouldn't be up here. No, there shouldn't be here
up here.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Guys, I've made it all the.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Way up here. I don't know I've spassed out or something.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Anyways, all right, anyway.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
So all right, I've got two stories and you have one.
Let's start with your story.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I have I actually have two.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Okay, you go, I go, you go, I go.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Okay, Okay, I forgot on the first show I saw
Final Destination Bloodlines. Okay, this is the story was good? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:34):
It was?
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Was it as good as the original?
Speaker 2 (02:38):
It was? It was better. It was really really good.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
The old ones suck.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
They don't.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
The first one was first one's.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Good, but like between, most of them are bad.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Yeah it was good.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
One of the deaths just like it was awesome.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah, it was really native. And then I saw Mission impossible.
To the name Mission Impossible, I think I said that
you talked about that.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Then they've done that? Is it my turn now?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Okay, so.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
I'm thanks Laura.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Eric.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
What's the other story?
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Can I tell you about.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
The board again?
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Eric?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Please tell a story? This is okay?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
All right, Laura?
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Did I tell you about the audition?
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah, no, go ahead, I did, Thanks Laura. Anyways, Yeah,
we need to we need to take that down.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Yeah, we do.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
It doesn't really makes any to scrub that name. Thanks
for pointing it out to us, Laura.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Anyways, I think you'll appreciate the story.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Okay, God to listen, Eric story, I sure, I'm sure
I will appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
If she must.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
I had an audition to be a streaming tea. Yeah,
tell you about this.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
We had a very heated conversation about it.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Did about the process, Yes, and you never texted since
I had my two hour premiere yes, it was live,
and I was actually going to blast it out on
Instagram to all my followers, O watch it, watch me
on TikTok on you know this this site. Thank god
I didn't. Why Okay, first of all the hours they
(04:18):
gave me two hours straight, two hours straight talking about
a treadmill and engaging with the TikTok's audio. Okay, No,
but the real gig is four hours non stop live TikTok.
So I do my two hours, and I am on
(04:40):
the treadmill the entire time. I'm showing them how it
goes faster, it goes slower, it lifts up, it lifts down,
the bars go down, the bars go up. But I
didn't know that I could actually step off the treadmill.
And there was another one next to me that I
could show all the details on that one. I was
sweating bullets, I had pit stains, I had back stains,
(05:02):
I had I had like crotch stains. I was so
hot and so i'ven't exercised in like two years, all right.
I looked the part I had my exercise clothes on,
and these dudes are like sitting there going you know,
they're writing these things on the screen like okay, well
talk more about the It was so chaotic and so
(05:25):
hard and like so crazy, so you quit. Well, they
gave me my critique after the two hours. I couldn't.
I was so happy the two hours were done. I
sold one.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I know well they were happy about it. But anyway,
oh my god. Then they said, okay, what's your availability
next week because then we want to start like we
have three days a week, four hours a day. And
I was thinking, I hated it, I.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Jack, why did I tell you about this job?
Speaker 1 (05:57):
Hated it?
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Let's think back a week ago. What did I tell
you about this job? I don't even man, I told
you a fucking run, but I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
I thought at least I had to try to. I
thought I'd be really good at.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
I want to work. Okay, this is what this is
a gorilla marketing agency. You don't want to work there.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
It's just he's drinking water. I I hated it. So yeah,
it was so hard.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
It's not worth a.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Tedious and it was like I had to keep repeating
myself and oh my god, this seven layers of cushion
and there's this forty five dB motor that last thirty
five hundred miles. It goes seven miles an hour with
three inclines, and like I had to keep circling back
and then engaging with like, oh, Hydro, Hi, what's up?
What's up? Satsy pants five? Where are you called? Where
(06:47):
are you dialing in from? Like nobody was talking to me.
I just let me just say that great questions. Nobody
would on talk.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Let me just say something real quick, because you keep
counting the fact that you are a sensitive allegedly, But
I think I am a psychic, specifically a seer. I
see the future. My predictions come true like nine out
of ten times. Right before the show, me and Eric
we're talking about something that I predicted coming.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
True and it did.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
What Well, we're not going to say it.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
We're not going to say it.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
We're talking about what we were talking about. But right
before the show, Yeah, I said, I called it. I
knew that was going to happen.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Yeah, am I like, do I know?
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Tell you after this, I'll just mute us.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Hold on, You're not a sensitive, No, but you might.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
I'm a psychic. I'm a seer.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I know he's not.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
He's just why what have you sensed recently. I think
we need to put this to the test because I
don't think you're sensitive at all. Oh boy, think you're
a pretender.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
This is what we're going to get into.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Oh no, bright, no, now we've opened pad door's box exactly.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
I'm calling you out. I don't think it's sensitive. Okay,
I think you're sensitive, but not you're not a sensitive Oh.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Yes I am. I could walk into a house and
I broth, that's not that. That doesn't meet.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Crying, Like I don't walk someone.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Do you know you're like, wow, it's really drafting.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
No, I know that something bad is I know that
something bad has occurred in the house, like I could
feel I feel bad vibes, I feel good vibes. I
feel vibes all the time.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
I would love to have you come to my house
and see it, because I know what's happened in the
house I live in.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
I do well now I do too, so like somebody
dying there.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Shit, I think I didn't think you remember that? Of
course I.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Remember that, so, but I would feel like what's happened
in your house growing up?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
No, this house that you that were currently in, because
I actually have pulled the the sale records in this house.
I know a thing or two.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Oh no, you haven't. It's public record.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Wait have you really?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Yeah no, it's not hard to find.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
It's lily and like.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
You can go in the.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Someone die here register register.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Well, because we don't pull up a spirit, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
I want you to tell me. Use your sensitivity and
tell me.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
I've never felt any weirdness in this house other than
that time I came down and I saw the spirit.
I felt something. But that's the only time. But the
previous house I lived in. Oh yeah, crazy, Oh for sure.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
That's six people have died in this house.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Brian.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
You ser.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
Like like murdered or like just died from all that time.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
I think it was two murders and four natural causes.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
To what you're two murders and four natural Oh stop
it right now, going to move out tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
People were murdering in this house.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Just two of the four.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Sorry, dude, that's the story.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
I believe one it was because this was I think
the murders was fifty. Yeah, it was like fifty six
and one in seventy two or something. I think one
was a drive by shooting. That was probably the seventy
two one, and I don't know the fifty six. I
think I don't know what that one was.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Murder.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
It's normal murder, but just normal murder. It may have
been it may have been actually a domestic abuse related.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Maybe you should lock your friend dor Oh my.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Gosh, what you didn't sense any of it?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Well, maybe they're not here because they probably they didn't
decide to stay here.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
How would you know how it works?
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Because you know what if I honed my talents, if
I were choosing not to. No, you have to hold them.
You have to learn. You have to but me from
like Natalie, Like Reverend Natalie.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
She learned.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
She is a she went.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
To psychic school, psychic school.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
She's always had it.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
I'm just gamming all that shit up.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
But I want you to not speak again, just so fun.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
It's probably gonna happen. I just think you're not that sensitive.
I think I'm sensitive. I think I'm a seer, fortune teller.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
He's wise, an owl, he's owls. That's why Brian owl.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Okay, then tell me about in a year am I gonna? Okay?
When am I going to find love? Mister seer of things?
When do you see the man? When is my twin
flame going to appear.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Define love like so I like the real one, just
like a love him. A couple of years won't be
this year, won't be next year. It's gonna a couple years.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Oh god, you'll be sixty.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Would you stop throwing that number out? Let me be
ready sixty.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
You'll have to use that cream on your JJ, Like
what cream? Well, you know to get it not dry?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
Oh it's called whatever.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
No it's not. There's like a cream for driving.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
I know, I know that.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Do you have it?
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Oh god, I've been prescribed that a long time ago
and I hated it.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Oh okay, well you tell your story.
Speaker 2 (12:07):
We just don't engage.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
We just had a guest on last last episode that
was very honest and very vulnerable, and therefore he was.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Being vulnerable about being bad ass because he's a cop.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
He is a badass too.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
He's like, he's like, let me tell you something really
about vulnerable. I'm probably the coolest personal ever meet. And
then you're like, let me be vulnerable. I have serious
problems downstairs. You guys are not the same.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
I'm just saying I might be able to relate to
somebody who's watching or listening that has the same problem.
I wouldn't know because there's nothing ben in there.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
Oh wait, I'm getting their vision. Oh oh yeah, you're
gonna You're always gonna have that problem.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Okay, so you should probably instead of that cream for
driver na then if nothing's been in there for a while,
I should probably get some sort of tumble weed remover
we wecker.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
It's shut up. It's shut like that little alien guy.
I have like no gem anymore.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Please tell your next story.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Okay, so no slit. Oh sorry, you need to go there.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
You don't need to go there. Stop it.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
That's it's disgusting. I know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Please, you'll go down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 3 (13:16):
All right. Just tell your story.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Please, it's her fault.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Just don't ignore. Just tell your story.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
When I was at the Lemon Festival in Ontario.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Were there lemons there?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
No? There was lots of bands.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
No.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
When I went up to see my mom with Evan.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
There were no lemons there.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
I don't know why it's called the Lemon Festivals, probably
on lemons.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Are you getting irritated?
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (13:39):
I sensed that coming me too.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
I when I go to festivals and stuff, we weren't.
It was at night. It was fun. There was like
a car's uh remember the band the car?
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Like what a imitator band? Anyway, it was fun. And
then there was like a damp personator thank you. And
then there was like a bunch of food and stuff
and there was Ben and I love the.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Vendors, right, yes you do.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
So I'm walking down the little vendor asle and something
is pulling me towards this one tent.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
Something spiritual. I think, yes, I said that.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Look at Brian and I lock eyes with this.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Woman and she said, I knew you would be coming.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
First of all, I think that sense you're talking about,
that sixth sense is something we call curiosity.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
And she goes, you need to come here and sit down.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
Wait, this is a fortune teller. Oh my god, what
the easiest way to scam people into giving you money.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
At the Lemon Festival. I'm sure she was legit.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
She's like, whoa wait, wait you you need to sit
down and give me ten dollars. I can feel it, Lord,
I believe.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
You're card reading forty five. She talked to me for
forty five.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
Oh my god, you got scammed so hard. That's incredible.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Lord, have mercy.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I need to do that. I mean, I could just
feel whoa you you? I can sense it. You need
to sit down and give me forty five from.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
A very deep rooted Greek family that all have a gift.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
What gift?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
What gift?
Speaker 1 (15:12):
Psychic? And Well told me something that she would have
no idea about me.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Yeah, that's called cold reading. That's the oldest scam in
the book.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
Well, I wrote down some things that she told me
because I picked. It was a tarot card I picked.
She told me to put my hand on the deck
and say three wishest loud. None of these I don't
even remember what I said, something like, what is my
career going to be like in a year? Am I
(15:43):
going to find love? And something else? So I came home,
I processed it, we did some stuff. I came home
and I wrote it down. She goes, and this is true.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Whoa?
Speaker 1 (15:58):
She goes, Your aura right now is red.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
That's not good.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
I can see it too from here I can see
it too.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
But she says, your your heart chakra and you're chakra.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Wait wait, this is too many mystical philosophy blending. But
she says, can't all be true.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
She says, they're very dark. She said, you there's a
blockage that is preventing you from poopingies.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Maybe while she was right on the money.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
There, but listen, this makes sense because look, it always
makes sense. That's why because I joined Hinge right because
I do want to find somebody, I do want love.
But have I looked at the app at all, like
maybe twice?
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Like what's preventing I love how you're in she says,
like super vague. You interpret it for her, and then
you go, oh my god, she was so right.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
She needs you need to fully love yourself first.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
Wow, that's so psychic.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Then she's says, in four months things are going to
start happening good, so it will count that.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Okay, let's count and then you'll just be like, you'll
just count all the good things that happen because good
things happen.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
And this is a real weird one. She said, You're
going to fall in love with somebody at work.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
It's going to be all take it back.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
You hire somebody that that is not there right now.
Speaker 3 (17:22):
Laura's going to start praying on the interns.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
They're probably always it's going to be my twin flame
like the one.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
See.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
I have a problem with that because that counteracts that
contradicts with my psychic prediction.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Yes, so I'm going to meet him at or Weird.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
How do you know it's not me? Oh?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Yeah, which job?
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I know? She said, But you are technically I mean
you've been here a while, but you were technically technically.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Well, I should say, Newest said new Hire.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
You're scared of vaginas. You would never want to see
my vaginas.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
No, I'm terrified, but it's it's love. Love is love.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Well, I'll take one for the team work. No, I'm kidding,
but I don't.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Wow how much i'd have to. You probably have to
pay m a thousand dollars.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Oh, I have to.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Don't get me involved in this sick old lady fantasy.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
But you don't know old lady kink?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
No, okay, now, I will say, to be fair, I don't.
I don't think of you as like an old lady.
Though I don't either. I just that's a small compliment
I'm gonna give you. Let me ask you this then, okay, Well,
I don't want to go into what I sleep.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
No, no, no, I want to ask you. Okay, So
I put my age rage on hinge very wide and
Marie my remakes, Laura, you got it shortenings.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
Is it twenty to eighty?
Speaker 1 (18:39):
No, it was thirty five to seventy.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Okay, bring it down from seventy. You're not dating a seventy.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
No, because the no, I'm not. I'm a tragedy younger men.
I am, but not that much.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
No, you don't want to date anybody in their thirties.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
All the dudes that have been hitting me up are
like thirty two.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
No.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
No, Like, my age is clearly on there. Here's the thing,
My age is clearly on there. I'm like, is that
a kink?
Speaker 3 (19:02):
I don't know if it's or.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Do they think like, oh I have such knowledge in
bed that I'm going to be like amazing, or like
what is it?
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Maybe maybe a little bit. I also think they think
they'll have a better shot because you are also going
to want younger man, So it's like they have a
higher chance of getting lucky essentially.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Okay, but when they're.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
Because older women are looserly when they're in their early
third they're there in their early thirties and you're in
your fifties, they are not fully cooked.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
So you're gonna want to You're gonna want to do forty.
I know that forty to sixty five.
Speaker 3 (19:33):
Well, it's comfortable. It depends on what you want. If
you're looking for your twin flame, it's not gonna be.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
In the thirty bracket.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
No, no, no, it's probably not even gonna be in
the forty bracket. It's probably gonna be in the fifty bracket.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
I'm thinking he's gonna be like forty eight.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Okay, that's not bad, and that's fine, that's okay. But
if you just want to test the water, so to speak,
then sure, like hook up.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, don't don't even do that with they're thirty two.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Yeah, that's fine. If a guy wants to, you know,
if it's consensual, knock yourself out.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
In my mind and in my soul, I kind of
want to go through a slut phase, okay, but I
don't think I can go through with it. I've never
been like slutty. I've never like been I'm not going
to be your college I had a tiny slut phase
in college and then I got PTSD because I hooked
up with a guy for on the first night and
he had the smallest waner I've almost in my life,
(20:27):
and I've never had a one night stand after that.
Speaker 3 (20:29):
I've heard that's actually yeah, I've heard that's pretty rough.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
It was.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
It would be traumatized. I don't know, like I mean,
remember when I drove you to a booty call one time.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
Oh that's so funny.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
That guy had a big one. Its tall.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
Yeah, but remember what I said to him when I
dropped you off and he was young, uh huh, and
I was all.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
Take care of my little girl.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Oh my god, Like that is so where that you
drop me off with.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
My hook up.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
You and I were having dinner or something, and you're all, hey,
I gotta go. I'm yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Remember Yeah, he called me the night thief because I
was stealing the blank It's all my at the night.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Please all right, just ok the last piece of ice.
Just don't be awkward.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Well can that be helped?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
Yeah, it should be.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Okay, that will kill it.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Okay, tell me what not to do.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Don't speak, don't just be confident.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Just be confident.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
I am confident. I'm a confident person.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
But you know this rest of this conversation we probably
have off air.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
You should tell him. You should write out a little
post it and just say, I just have my tonsils removed.
I can't speak and just sit there and nod and smile.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Is that like? Would that be attractive? Because no, no,
don't listen there, I haven't. Won't you always you always
bust out that I have no gag reflegs.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
No, okay, noa I I showed you. Oh that's true.
I have.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
And I'm like, oh, okay, let's go back to this
se but I had to teach you how to do
it on a banana. We're getting so off track here,
and apparently I'm not good at it because you're using
your teeth.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I have too big a teeth. What am I supposed
to do? What can I do?
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Gum it I do?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Let's not talk about I'm serious, Let's talk about this.
This is a great conversation I have off air.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
He's getting nervous. I know.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
No, it's it's that we might start running a foul
of some community.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
Yeah, Eric, don't. Okay, Now, look, there's not one reason
why she would say this thing.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Okay, she goes.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Then she's like your father that you there's a father
figure surrounding you big time. Your father has passed, has
any And I'm like, yes, like.
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Well she probably just how old you are?
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yeah, exactly. That's such an easy guess.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
She said. His energy surrounds me and I already know that.
She said, my other guardian angels were the ones that
were speaking through the cards, and my dad was kind
of off to the side. I'm like, that makes a
ton of because my dad hated crowds and it was
super crowded at this festival.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
You're so projecting into that.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Shut up. And then she said this. She goes, I'm
seeing like ice cream and like a celebration, like he
frequent celebrations with him. I'm like, oh my god. We
as kids would play the game Horse, the basketball game,
you know, that game with my dad, and if we lost,
(23:27):
we'd have to buy him a beer. We could actually
go into the liquor store and buy a beer. We
were like eight years old.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Oh my god, that sounds.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
He lost, he'd have to buy us ice cream Sundays
from Basket and Robins. Well, of course he always lost, right,
So we always had these great ice cream Sundays and
we always celebrated that way. And even now on his
on his birthday and on the day he died, Jenny
and I will sometimes on our own go get an
ice cream Sunday in his honor. How would she know that?
(23:56):
That was kind of cool? Yeah, that's thank you and that.
Oh and then she said, I said, well, these are
his ashes right here, and she goes, you know, he
loves that you did that. He loves that he know
that you guys know that he's around. I'm like, is
(24:17):
he tired of watching over me? Because I'm a lot
like I have a feeling he's like running ragged up
in heaven because I'm not easy to watch and she goes, no,
he loves it. He loves that you guys know that
he's around. And da da da, that made my That
was worth forty five dollars me and you can suck it.
And you know what, the sixty seven dollars three corn
dog to drink was not worth it. But the whole
(24:39):
night was fun because I.
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Was with my family. I think I think someone could
say stuff equally important to you for less than forty
five dollars. It just seems like a lot of money.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
Well, you're gonna die when I tell you this.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
You're like, oh no, here's a hundredgar belt, tell me more.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
No. And this is when I knew this was a racket.
This I liked some of the things. She said, we're
kind of right on, and I kind of believed some
of the stuff.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
So she semi psychic.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
So then this came around, hold on, oh boy, nervous.
It goes, you really really need an energy cleansing. You
need to unblock that. I can do that for you.
I have these candles that are like she was describing
these incredible big candles she got from there from like
(25:27):
the Vatican or something, and that they're they're super expensive,
and she uses those two. She said, it's a two
hour it'll take at least two hours, and she would
do it for me, and she goes, I go, I
really don't have that kind of expendable I don't know
how much you would charge for that. She goes. She goes,
(25:49):
I would do it for you for a thousand dollars.
Oh my god, I said, wait, and I go, I
I guess I appreciate the discount, but that is a
little out of my budget to be cleansed. Why a
candle from the Vatican.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
I'll do it for you, Laura, for five ninety five.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
And so then she goes, I accept payment plans. Oh,
I said, oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Well you're all, how does a dollar years.
Speaker 1 (26:24):
A thousand years? I'm like, how in the world could
so many like people do that they pay that? And
then I knew. I was like, Okay, this is like crap,
this is a bunch of I mean, she's trying to
make a living. I understand, you know, and I liked
some of the things she said, and I thought it
was worth the money just to talk about my dad. Okay,
(26:47):
but that like really threw me for a loop.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And then I bought this really cool sweatshirt and then
Evan and Faith were like judging me. They're like, do
you have that kind of money to spend? I thought
we were to save Evans. I'm ever going to save
the money to know to it that a nice restaurant like Evans.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
Zip it.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You guys, stop judging me, because judge she's right, Well,
I got this badass sweatshirt for thirty bucks. Big deal,
thirty bucks.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Maybe you should stop sprom doing so much money. It's funny.
Fortune tellers never tell you to be financially responsible, so weird.
Don't you think that would come up in your fortune?
Speaker 1 (27:24):
It's so odd. I almost had that woman call in
to give us a real tarot cardcase, you know, like
I always try to do it.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
I'm imposing a new rule. You guys need to screen
guests by me first. I need to be able to
approve them first. Even, yes, even I know one guest
that was like, oh, there have been multiple.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Turn down the sound, give me one more.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I honestly, if I went through all them, I probably
most of them there, both of yours, I probably wouldn't.
I probably would act it.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
You know what. It's your turn to bring in a guest. No, yeah, no, yeah,
are you part of this podcast?
Speaker 3 (28:03):
I am, but I don't slicit guests.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Do you have an idea for a good guest?
Speaker 3 (28:09):
No, I don't think we need guests that often.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
Well, I Omar was awesome.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
He was awesome, He's amazing.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
He was one of the select He was one of
the I would say, one of the select few that
gets into the higher echelons. Good guests, Yes, you've had.
We have a lot of really mediocre guests.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Wow, you just offended a lot of people's fine. Okay,
well that's the norm for you. Apparently again it's me
why hold on nothing.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
I'm working on a couple of good guests, right, I
will scream them first.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
We need to scream them. Eric.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Also, I'm going to say one word and you'll want
you'll be like, get them on. Can's what that word is? This?
Speaker 1 (28:52):
Okay Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
I'm I'm I'm I'm not being excited about anything, he
says either.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yea, Oh, you will be when I say it.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
Okay, say the word.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Take a guess celebrity. Yes, okay, so random, like as
celebrity that we've never heard of.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Mmmm, well you probably haven't, but there's hundreds of thousands
of people that have.
Speaker 3 (29:17):
Just say the word.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Well, I'm going to get what will this person be
in this seat or on the phone? No, on the phone?
Speaker 1 (29:27):
Is this person from Hollywood?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
What's the name.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
I'm going to give you the Okay, So I want
you to guess the genre TV Uh musician no, movie
star yes?
Speaker 3 (29:45):
Actor or crew actor. Yeah, that's what you call it.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Crew actor?
Speaker 3 (29:51):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (29:53):
A young or older it's gonna be older, character actor yes,
Christian Bale No, so we aren't going to know this guy.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
Now I want you to do a genre horror.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
No, please not be comedy.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
I think it could be depending on the film. Could
be depending on the film. Jason, Nope, Oh god, I
wish we got to work on things.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
I guess like that.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
Okay, I'm going to say one word.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Okay, do it, and you are both gonna be like,
I never going to end this show.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
So one is an actress, one is an actor.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Is the same word for both of them or do
they have their own word?
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Yes? And that word is porn.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
I am gonna I'm gonna vedo this right.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
Nope, it's gonna be good.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I don't think we should have porn stars.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Oh yeah, Wait, let's just talk this out a little bit.
We're not going to know the person because I don't
watch porn. I don't know about you. You know, I
don't know, but I.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
Used to have to order porn, so I had to
go to the.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
To know about the profession. I don't I would be interested.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
Yes, is that really something we want?
Speaker 2 (31:13):
And they're like both fascinating. They're both fascinating.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (31:17):
What's our show about entertainment? Porn? Adult entertainment?
Speaker 1 (31:22):
Like, what is it like to be an adult entertainer?
How did you get into it?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Well, I take my dick out and I put it
in the way, way way more because I needed money
and I didn't have any reservations about showing tell us.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
About the first time. Were you scared that?
Speaker 3 (31:37):
I was really hard and I put my how do
you get hard?
Speaker 2 (31:40):
He's written a book?
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Come on? Is this.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
She's written a book? I'm really not sure. She's written
a book. And he's had a fascinating life, he's great.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
What's what's the chick's name?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
What's the saying right now?
Speaker 3 (31:54):
What's first? Just gonna be the first name? D that's
just day dick sucker like d e.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
No, let's just put it on you, Donna.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Okay, okay, you know what. We'll talk about it. But
I am in, I'm in, Brian, are we are we
kind of getting you in a little bit. Are the
fascination of it just like interest of it? Or now
you're looking them up?
Speaker 3 (32:40):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (32:43):
Right, you know, if you guys want to, that's fine.
I wouldn't recommend it.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Oh okay, that'll be good.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
I'm just not I'm really not intolight.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
I'm not either, but I'm just interesting.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
Curious either though.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
No, but this is the thing. I love reading biographies,
read hers, and it's just so fascinating to see what
makes people do.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
What's Erica going to be on with the Baywatch stuff? Oh?
Speaker 2 (33:08):
I just talked to her. So we're we're scheduling.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Okay, now that would be good. Let's do that again. Okay, anyway,
you guys, so coming up, we have some great guests
lined up.
Speaker 3 (33:18):
It sounds all we have talked about.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
This episode is literally just I know it's all Laura's fault.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
It's your fault. The rabbit hole always it was.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
It was partially your fault.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
It was part yeah, see.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Because you're like I was on hinge.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
Yeah, hi, pot it's kettle.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Can I get them?
Speaker 1 (33:38):
And then you all right?
Speaker 3 (33:39):
Let's end this.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
So hard?
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Oh wait, here's a story, one more story, is it? Okay, Brian's.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
I'm skeptical. No, I'm just scared of how like we've
already derailed pretty far. This is a good place to
end it now that we're keeping it.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
It would be a good little bow on.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
I'm worried we get work.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Is this something that I'll be like the bank?
Speaker 2 (33:59):
Yes? Okay, okay, because it could only happen to me.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Oh okay, I like this.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
So on Friday afternoon, I went to the grocery store.
Now I'm not gonna say which one, just in case
there was one. Yes, I know your stores. I just
ran in for a couple of things, and I had
a I had a bag in my car that's yellow
(34:27):
and it's got I thought it was a lot sturdier,
like a tote bag. Yeah, and it turns out I've
used it before. But it turns out I had a
few too many things in it and it's big. But
the material for the straps apparently was not strong enough
to hold what I had. So as I got to
(34:50):
the store, I realized the pants I was wearing I
forgot to put a belt on, so I was constantly
I had to carry my phone my keys because they
kept falling down. Okay, that plays a very important part
of this story. Okay, I check out, I'm on my
(35:10):
way to my car. The strap snaps, the bag hits
the ground, and everything in the bag starts just rolling
everywhere in every direction. You can imagine, down the driveway,
to the side, to the right behind me. I'm frantically,
(35:33):
you know, I dropped my phone, drop my keys, drop
the bag, and frantically bending over trying to pick things up,
and my pants.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Fall down and you don't wear underwear. Nope, did mister
happy come out?
Speaker 2 (35:48):
He did?
Speaker 3 (35:49):
So I just want you to I just want you
to know that technically.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
Buns out, guns out, technically exposure, and that can get
you arrested.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Also, and if there's kids present, I can get you
on a very certain list.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Thank god, thank god.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Did anybody see the front part?
Speaker 3 (36:07):
No, you should just you should wear underwears all.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Keep that, keep it nice and tight. You know what
I'm saying. Don't let it get said. Oh dude, see
this is what I really wish. You would let me
install a camera in your room? No because no? Yeah
what No, this is because the one time he told
the story, but because he sleeps naked and when he
freaked out because like a spider crawled across his face
(36:32):
and you were ran out of the room, that out
That would be hysterical scene, you run naked with your
wiener flapping around. Well, we tixelated, of course, but uh yeah,
put underwear on, dude, that's like say, because you oftentimes
have VPO. Anyway, I'm gonna end on that visible penis
(36:53):
line in his thinly thin thin shorts.
Speaker 3 (36:58):
God, no, they weren't shorts. They were just we still
couldn't escape the dick.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
I know it's time to end, all right. We'll be
back next week.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
Oh and Clia from Dolphace Class, Yes, I wore last night.
I went to dinner with a friend in Coronado and
I wore my sweatshirt that she that.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
You got me, Yes, the one with a girl in
the gun. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Then I got mobbed.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
So Clia, Claire, you are onto something girl.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
I texted her because I was like, get ready. I
don't know how many people I gave her. Oh that's
awesome website too, So yeah, good for you.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
All right, we love her all right, guys, thank you
so much and love your podcast.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
Love your podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
I love you, my sweet babies. Bye bye.
Can you see my oh hill, what's up? Everybody? Thank
you for tuning in to Laura Kane after Dark. I'm
Laura Kane. Remember this handsome devil over here?
Speaker 2 (00:22):
You sexy little thing?
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Oh my god. And then we have producer Brian who's
about to puke in his mouth a little bit.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
No, I've gotten used to.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
You just have a bucket that you just puke into.
Do you like get cringe?
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Do you like that?
Speaker 3 (00:37):
You guys?
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Do you like that?
Speaker 1 (00:40):
What is that? Is it?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
No? I was scratching at my between my eyebrows. Why
I don't know it? Itched?
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Do you like this? Do you see this?
Speaker 2 (00:49):
What?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
What's that? Spider bike?
Speaker 1 (00:54):
Nope?
Speaker 3 (00:54):
Oh it's like swollen too.
Speaker 1 (00:56):
Yes, I want you to guess what the flea bite?
Speaker 3 (00:58):
How I got this something with your advanced age of
sixty five?
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Shut up?
Speaker 3 (01:03):
No, I got punched. No, wait, it's actually it looks
pretty swollen.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
I know what is that?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
Because it wouldn't stop bleeding.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
Did you cut yourself shaving?
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Yes? I shave?
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Oh all the way up there?
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Is that? Are you joking?
Speaker 1 (01:22):
My hairs are getting.
Speaker 2 (01:23):
Longer, longer beard? Oh?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
And I have like a little like light flesh colored
mole right here, and I just shaved it right off
by accident, and it would not stop bleeding. Oh my god,
it's pressing on it, pressing on it, pressing on it.
So now it looks like I got out of prison,
like I killed something bad.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
It's the most hilarious like I've ever heard. I was
totally joking when I said it.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
I shave my feet. Oh my god, I just I
put shaven cream on and I just shave it.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Oh my god, that is amazing.
Speaker 3 (01:49):
Let me give you a friendly suggestion, just keep that
to yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
God women do that.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
Not I'm aware, but the where you cut yourself.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
I shouldn't be up here. No, there shouldn't be here
up here.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Guys, I've made it all the.
Speaker 1 (02:07):
Way up here. I don't know I've spassed out or something.
Speaker 2 (02:10):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Anyways, all right, anyway.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
So all right, I've got two stories and you have one.
Let's start with your story.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
I have I actually have two.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Okay, you go, I go, you go, I go.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Okay, Okay, I forgot on the first show I saw
Final Destination Bloodlines. Okay, this is the story was good? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (02:34):
It was?
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Was it as good as the original?
Speaker 2 (02:38):
It was? It was better. It was really really good.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
The old ones suck.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
They don't.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
The first one was first one's.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
Good, but like between, most of them are bad.
Speaker 2 (02:46):
Yeah it was good.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
One of the deaths just like it was awesome.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Yeah, it was really native. And then I saw Mission impossible.
To the name Mission Impossible, I think I said that
you talked about that.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Then they've done that? Is it my turn now?
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Okay, so.
Speaker 3 (03:03):
I'm thanks Laura.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Eric.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
What's the other story?
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Can I tell you about.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
The board again?
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Eric?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Please tell a story? This is okay?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
All right, Laura?
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Did I tell you about the audition?
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Yeah, no, go ahead, I did, Thanks Laura. Anyways, Yeah,
we need to we need to take that down.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Yeah, we do.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
It doesn't really makes any to scrub that name. Thanks
for pointing it out to us, Laura.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Anyways, I think you'll appreciate the story.
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Okay, God to listen, Eric story, I sure, I'm sure
I will appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
If she must.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
I had an audition to be a streaming tea. Yeah,
tell you about this.
Speaker 3 (03:51):
We had a very heated conversation about it.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Did about the process, Yes, and you never texted since
I had my two hour premiere yes, it was live,
and I was actually going to blast it out on
Instagram to all my followers, O watch it, watch me
on TikTok on you know this this site. Thank god
I didn't. Why Okay, first of all the hours they
(04:18):
gave me two hours straight, two hours straight talking about
a treadmill and engaging with the TikTok's audio. Okay, No,
but the real gig is four hours non stop live TikTok.
So I do my two hours, and I am on
(04:40):
the treadmill the entire time. I'm showing them how it
goes faster, it goes slower, it lifts up, it lifts down,
the bars go down, the bars go up. But I
didn't know that I could actually step off the treadmill.
And there was another one next to me that I
could show all the details on that one. I was
sweating bullets, I had pit stains, I had back stains,
(05:02):
I had I had like crotch stains. I was so
hot and so i'ven't exercised in like two years, all right.
I looked the part I had my exercise clothes on,
and these dudes are like sitting there going you know,
they're writing these things on the screen like okay, well
talk more about the It was so chaotic and so
(05:25):
hard and like so crazy, so you quit. Well, they
gave me my critique after the two hours. I couldn't.
I was so happy the two hours were done. I
sold one.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I know well they were happy about it. But anyway,
oh my god. Then they said, okay, what's your availability
next week because then we want to start like we
have three days a week, four hours a day. And
I was thinking, I hated it, I.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Jack, why did I tell you about this job?
Speaker 1 (05:57):
Hated it?
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Let's think back a week ago. What did I tell
you about this job? I don't even man, I told
you a fucking run, but I didn't know.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
I thought at least I had to try to. I
thought I'd be really good at.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
I want to work. Okay, this is what this is
a gorilla marketing agency. You don't want to work there.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
It's just he's drinking water. I I hated it. So yeah,
it was so hard.
Speaker 3 (06:24):
It's not worth a.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Tedious and it was like I had to keep repeating
myself and oh my god, this seven layers of cushion
and there's this forty five dB motor that last thirty
five hundred miles. It goes seven miles an hour with
three inclines, and like I had to keep circling back
and then engaging with like, oh, Hydro, Hi, what's up?
What's up? Satsy pants five? Where are you called? Where
(06:47):
are you dialing in from? Like nobody was talking to me.
I just let me just say that great questions. Nobody
would on talk.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Let me just say something real quick, because you keep
counting the fact that you are a sensitive allegedly, But
I think I am a psychic, specifically a seer. I
see the future. My predictions come true like nine out
of ten times. Right before the show, me and Eric
we're talking about something that I predicted coming.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
True and it did.
Speaker 3 (07:16):
What Well, we're not going to say it.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
We're not going to say it.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
We're talking about what we were talking about. But right
before the show, Yeah, I said, I called it. I
knew that was going to happen.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Yeah, am I like, do I know?
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Tell you after this, I'll just mute us.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
Hold on, You're not a sensitive, No, but you might.
Speaker 3 (07:45):
I'm a psychic. I'm a seer.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I know he's not.
Speaker 3 (07:48):
He's just why what have you sensed recently. I think
we need to put this to the test because I
don't think you're sensitive at all. Oh boy, think you're
a pretender.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
This is what we're going to get into.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Oh no, bright, no, now we've opened pad door's box exactly.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
I'm calling you out. I don't think it's sensitive. Okay,
I think you're sensitive, but not you're not a sensitive Oh.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
Yes I am. I could walk into a house and
I broth, that's not that. That doesn't meet.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Crying, Like I don't walk someone.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Do you know you're like, wow, it's really drafting.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
No, I know that something bad is I know that
something bad has occurred in the house, like I could
feel I feel bad vibes, I feel good vibes. I
feel vibes all the time.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
I would love to have you come to my house
and see it, because I know what's happened in the
house I live in.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
I do well now I do too, so like somebody
dying there.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
Shit, I think I didn't think you remember that? Of
course I.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Remember that, so, but I would feel like what's happened
in your house growing up?
Speaker 3 (08:44):
No, this house that you that were currently in, because
I actually have pulled the the sale records in this house.
I know a thing or two.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Oh no, you haven't. It's public record.
Speaker 1 (08:55):
Wait have you really?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Yeah no, it's not hard to find.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
It's lily and like.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
You can go in the.
Speaker 3 (09:00):
Someone die here register register.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Well, because we don't pull up a spirit, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (09:05):
I want you to tell me. Use your sensitivity and
tell me.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
I've never felt any weirdness in this house other than
that time I came down and I saw the spirit.
I felt something. But that's the only time. But the
previous house I lived in. Oh yeah, crazy, Oh for sure.
Speaker 3 (09:26):
That's six people have died in this house.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Brian.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
You ser.
Speaker 1 (09:34):
Like like murdered or like just died from all that time.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
I think it was two murders and four natural causes.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
To what you're two murders and four natural Oh stop
it right now, going to move out tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (09:54):
People were murdering in this house.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Just two of the four.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Sorry, dude, that's the story.
Speaker 3 (10:01):
I believe one it was because this was I think
the murders was fifty. Yeah, it was like fifty six
and one in seventy two or something. I think one
was a drive by shooting. That was probably the seventy
two one, and I don't know the fifty six. I
think I don't know what that one was.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Murder.
Speaker 3 (10:18):
It's normal murder, but just normal murder. It may have
been it may have been actually a domestic abuse related.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Maybe you should lock your friend dor Oh my.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Gosh, what you didn't sense any of it?
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Well, maybe they're not here because they probably they didn't
decide to stay here.
Speaker 3 (10:33):
How would you know how it works?
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Because you know what if I honed my talents, if
I were choosing not to. No, you have to hold them.
You have to learn. You have to but me from
like Natalie, Like Reverend Natalie.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
She learned.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
She is a she went.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
To psychic school, psychic school.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
She's always had it.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
I'm just gamming all that shit up.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
But I want you to not speak again, just so fun.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
It's probably gonna happen. I just think you're not that sensitive.
I think I'm sensitive. I think I'm a seer, fortune teller.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
He's wise, an owl, he's owls. That's why Brian owl.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Okay, then tell me about in a year am I gonna? Okay?
When am I going to find love? Mister seer of things?
When do you see the man? When is my twin
flame going to appear.
Speaker 3 (11:26):
Define love like so I like the real one, just
like a love him. A couple of years won't be
this year, won't be next year. It's gonna a couple years.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Oh god, you'll be sixty.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Would you stop throwing that number out? Let me be
ready sixty.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
You'll have to use that cream on your JJ, Like
what cream? Well, you know to get it not dry?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
Oh it's called whatever.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
No it's not. There's like a cream for driving.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
I know, I know that.
Speaker 2 (11:57):
Do you have it?
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Oh god, I've been prescribed that a long time ago
and I hated it.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Oh okay, well you tell your story.
Speaker 2 (12:07):
We just don't engage.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
We just had a guest on last last episode that
was very honest and very vulnerable, and therefore he was.
Speaker 3 (12:16):
Being vulnerable about being bad ass because he's a cop.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
He is a badass too.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
He's like, he's like, let me tell you something really
about vulnerable. I'm probably the coolest personal ever meet. And
then you're like, let me be vulnerable. I have serious
problems downstairs. You guys are not the same.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
I'm just saying I might be able to relate to
somebody who's watching or listening that has the same problem.
I wouldn't know because there's nothing ben in there.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
Oh wait, I'm getting their vision. Oh oh yeah, you're
gonna You're always gonna have that problem.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Okay, so you should probably instead of that cream for
driver na then if nothing's been in there for a while,
I should probably get some sort of tumble weed remover
we wecker.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
It's shut up. It's shut like that little alien guy.
I have like no gem anymore.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Please tell your next story.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Okay, so no slit. Oh sorry, you need to go there.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
You don't need to go there. Stop it.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
That's it's disgusting. I know.
Speaker 1 (13:15):
Please, you'll go down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 3 (13:16):
All right. Just tell your story.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Please, it's her fault.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Just don't ignore. Just tell your story.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
When I was at the Lemon Festival in Ontario.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Were there lemons there?
Speaker 1 (13:26):
No? There was lots of bands.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
No.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
When I went up to see my mom with Evan.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
There were no lemons there.
Speaker 1 (13:32):
I don't know why it's called the Lemon Festivals, probably
on lemons.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Are you getting irritated?
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (13:39):
I sensed that coming me too.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
I when I go to festivals and stuff, we weren't.
It was at night. It was fun. There was like
a car's uh remember the band the car?
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Like what a imitator band? Anyway, it was fun. And
then there was like a damp personator thank you. And
then there was like a bunch of food and stuff
and there was Ben and I love the.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Vendors, right, yes you do.
Speaker 1 (14:02):
So I'm walking down the little vendor asle and something
is pulling me towards this one tent.
Speaker 3 (14:10):
Something spiritual. I think, yes, I said that.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
Look at Brian and I lock eyes with this.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
Woman and she said, I knew you would be coming.
Speaker 3 (14:22):
First of all, I think that sense you're talking about,
that sixth sense is something we call curiosity.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
And she goes, you need to come here and sit down.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
Wait, this is a fortune teller. Oh my god, what
the easiest way to scam people into giving you money.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
At the Lemon Festival. I'm sure she was legit.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
She's like, whoa wait, wait you you need to sit
down and give me ten dollars. I can feel it, Lord,
I believe.
Speaker 1 (14:49):
You're card reading forty five. She talked to me for
forty five.
Speaker 3 (14:54):
Oh my god, you got scammed so hard. That's incredible.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Lord, have mercy.
Speaker 3 (14:58):
I need to do that. I mean, I could just
feel whoa you you? I can sense it. You need
to sit down and give me forty five from.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
A very deep rooted Greek family that all have a gift.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
What gift?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
What gift?
Speaker 1 (15:12):
Psychic? And Well told me something that she would have
no idea about me.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Yeah, that's called cold reading. That's the oldest scam in
the book.
Speaker 1 (15:22):
Well, I wrote down some things that she told me
because I picked. It was a tarot card I picked.
She told me to put my hand on the deck
and say three wishest loud. None of these I don't
even remember what I said, something like, what is my
career going to be like in a year? Am I
(15:43):
going to find love? And something else? So I came home,
I processed it, we did some stuff. I came home
and I wrote it down. She goes, and this is true.
Speaker 3 (15:57):
Whoa?
Speaker 1 (15:58):
She goes, Your aura right now is red.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
That's not good.
Speaker 3 (16:06):
I can see it too from here I can see
it too.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
But she says, your your heart chakra and you're chakra.
Speaker 3 (16:13):
Wait wait, this is too many mystical philosophy blending. But
she says, can't all be true.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
She says, they're very dark. She said, you there's a
blockage that is preventing you from poopingies.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
Maybe while she was right on the money.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
There, but listen, this makes sense because look, it always
makes sense. That's why because I joined Hinge right because
I do want to find somebody, I do want love.
But have I looked at the app at all, like
maybe twice?
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Like what's preventing I love how you're in she says,
like super vague. You interpret it for her, and then
you go, oh my god, she was so right.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
She needs you need to fully love yourself first.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
Wow, that's so psychic.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
Then she's says, in four months things are going to
start happening good, so it will count that.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Okay, let's count and then you'll just be like, you'll
just count all the good things that happen because good
things happen.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
And this is a real weird one. She said, You're
going to fall in love with somebody at work.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
It's going to be all take it back.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
You hire somebody that that is not there right now.
Speaker 3 (17:22):
Laura's going to start praying on the interns.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
They're probably always it's going to be my twin flame
like the one.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
See.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
I have a problem with that because that counteracts that
contradicts with my psychic prediction.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
Yes, so I'm going to meet him at or Weird.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
How do you know it's not me? Oh?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Yeah, which job?
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I know? She said, But you are technically I mean
you've been here a while, but you were technically technically.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Well, I should say, Newest said new Hire.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
You're scared of vaginas. You would never want to see
my vaginas.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
No, I'm terrified, but it's it's love. Love is love.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
Well, I'll take one for the team work. No, I'm kidding,
but I don't.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Wow how much i'd have to. You probably have to
pay m a thousand dollars.
Speaker 3 (18:07):
Oh, I have to.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Don't get me involved in this sick old lady fantasy.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
But you don't know old lady kink?
Speaker 3 (18:15):
No, okay, now, I will say, to be fair, I don't.
I don't think of you as like an old lady.
Though I don't either. I just that's a small compliment
I'm gonna give you. Let me ask you this then, okay, Well,
I don't want to go into what I sleep.
Speaker 1 (18:29):
No, no, no, I want to ask you. Okay, So
I put my age rage on hinge very wide and
Marie my remakes, Laura, you got it shortenings.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
Is it twenty to eighty?
Speaker 1 (18:39):
No, it was thirty five to seventy.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
Okay, bring it down from seventy. You're not dating a seventy.
Speaker 1 (18:44):
No, because the no, I'm not. I'm a tragedy younger men.
I am, but not that much.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
No, you don't want to date anybody in their thirties.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
All the dudes that have been hitting me up are
like thirty two.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
No.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
No, Like, my age is clearly on there. Here's the thing,
My age is clearly on there. I'm like, is that
a kink?
Speaker 3 (19:02):
I don't know if it's or.
Speaker 1 (19:03):
Do they think like, oh I have such knowledge in
bed that I'm going to be like amazing, or like
what is it?
Speaker 3 (19:08):
Maybe maybe a little bit. I also think they think
they'll have a better shot because you are also going
to want younger man, So it's like they have a
higher chance of getting lucky essentially.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
Okay, but when they're.
Speaker 1 (19:19):
Because older women are looserly when they're in their early
third they're there in their early thirties and you're in
your fifties, they are not fully cooked.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
So you're gonna want to You're gonna want to do forty.
I know that forty to sixty five.
Speaker 3 (19:33):
Well, it's comfortable. It depends on what you want. If
you're looking for your twin flame, it's not gonna be.
Speaker 2 (19:39):
In the thirty bracket.
Speaker 3 (19:40):
No, no, no, it's probably not even gonna be in
the forty bracket. It's probably gonna be in the fifty bracket.
Speaker 1 (19:45):
I'm thinking he's gonna be like forty eight.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Okay, that's not bad, and that's fine, that's okay. But
if you just want to test the water, so to speak,
then sure, like hook up.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, don't don't even do that with they're thirty two.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Yeah, that's fine. If a guy wants to, you know,
if it's consensual, knock yourself out.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
In my mind and in my soul, I kind of
want to go through a slut phase, okay, but I
don't think I can go through with it. I've never
been like slutty. I've never like been I'm not going
to be your college I had a tiny slut phase
in college and then I got PTSD because I hooked
up with a guy for on the first night and
he had the smallest waner I've almost in my life,
(20:27):
and I've never had a one night stand after that.
Speaker 3 (20:29):
I've heard that's actually yeah, I've heard that's pretty rough.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
It was.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
It would be traumatized. I don't know, like I mean,
remember when I drove you to a booty call one time.
Speaker 3 (20:36):
Oh that's so funny.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
That guy had a big one. Its tall.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
Yeah, but remember what I said to him when I
dropped you off and he was young, uh huh, and
I was all.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
Take care of my little girl.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Oh my god, Like that is so where that you
drop me off with.
Speaker 3 (20:49):
My hook up.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
You and I were having dinner or something, and you're all, hey,
I gotta go. I'm yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Remember Yeah, he called me the night thief because I
was stealing the blank It's all my at the night.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
Please all right, just ok the last piece of ice.
Just don't be awkward.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Well can that be helped?
Speaker 3 (21:10):
Yeah, it should be.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Okay, that will kill it.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Okay, tell me what not to do.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
Don't speak, don't just be confident.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Just be confident.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
I am confident. I'm a confident person.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
But you know this rest of this conversation we probably
have off air.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
You should tell him. You should write out a little
post it and just say, I just have my tonsils removed.
I can't speak and just sit there and nod and smile.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Is that like? Would that be attractive? Because no, no,
don't listen there, I haven't. Won't you always you always
bust out that I have no gag reflegs.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
No, okay, noa I I showed you. Oh that's true.
I have.
Speaker 3 (21:46):
And I'm like, oh, okay, let's go back to this
se but I had to teach you how to do
it on a banana. We're getting so off track here,
and apparently I'm not good at it because you're using
your teeth.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
I have too big a teeth. What am I supposed
to do? What can I do?
Speaker 2 (21:59):
Gum it I do?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
Let's not talk about I'm serious, Let's talk about this.
This is a great conversation I have off air.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
He's getting nervous. I know.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
No, it's it's that we might start running a foul
of some community.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
Yeah, Eric, don't. Okay, Now, look, there's not one reason
why she would say this thing.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
Okay, she goes.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Then she's like your father that you there's a father
figure surrounding you big time. Your father has passed, has
any And I'm like, yes, like.
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Well she probably just how old you are?
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Yeah, exactly. That's such an easy guess.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
She said. His energy surrounds me and I already know that.
She said, my other guardian angels were the ones that
were speaking through the cards, and my dad was kind
of off to the side. I'm like, that makes a
ton of because my dad hated crowds and it was
super crowded at this festival.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
You're so projecting into that.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Shut up. And then she said this. She goes, I'm
seeing like ice cream and like a celebration, like he
frequent celebrations with him. I'm like, oh my god. We
as kids would play the game Horse, the basketball game,
you know, that game with my dad, and if we lost,
(23:27):
we'd have to buy him a beer. We could actually
go into the liquor store and buy a beer. We
were like eight years old.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Oh my god, that sounds.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
He lost, he'd have to buy us ice cream Sundays
from Basket and Robins. Well, of course he always lost, right,
So we always had these great ice cream Sundays and
we always celebrated that way. And even now on his
on his birthday and on the day he died, Jenny
and I will sometimes on our own go get an
ice cream Sunday in his honor. How would she know that?
(23:56):
That was kind of cool? Yeah, that's thank you and that.
Oh and then she said, I said, well, these are
his ashes right here, and she goes, you know, he
loves that you did that. He loves that he know
that you guys know that he's around. I'm like, is
(24:17):
he tired of watching over me? Because I'm a lot
like I have a feeling he's like running ragged up
in heaven because I'm not easy to watch and she goes, no,
he loves it. He loves that you guys know that
he's around. And da da da, that made my That
was worth forty five dollars me and you can suck it.
And you know what, the sixty seven dollars three corn
dog to drink was not worth it. But the whole
(24:39):
night was fun because I.
Speaker 3 (24:40):
Was with my family. I think I think someone could
say stuff equally important to you for less than forty
five dollars. It just seems like a lot of money.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
Well, you're gonna die when I tell you this.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
You're like, oh no, here's a hundredgar belt, tell me more.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
No. And this is when I knew this was a racket.
This I liked some of the things. She said, we're
kind of right on, and I kind of believed some
of the stuff.
Speaker 3 (25:03):
So she semi psychic.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
So then this came around, hold on, oh boy, nervous.
It goes, you really really need an energy cleansing. You
need to unblock that. I can do that for you.
I have these candles that are like she was describing
these incredible big candles she got from there from like
(25:27):
the Vatican or something, and that they're they're super expensive,
and she uses those two. She said, it's a two
hour it'll take at least two hours, and she would
do it for me, and she goes, I go, I
really don't have that kind of expendable I don't know
how much you would charge for that. She goes. She goes,
(25:49):
I would do it for you for a thousand dollars.
Oh my god, I said, wait, and I go, I
I guess I appreciate the discount, but that is a
little out of my budget to be cleansed. Why a
candle from the Vatican.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
I'll do it for you, Laura, for five ninety five.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
And so then she goes, I accept payment plans. Oh,
I said, oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (26:19):
Well you're all, how does a dollar years.
Speaker 1 (26:24):
A thousand years? I'm like, how in the world could
so many like people do that they pay that? And
then I knew. I was like, Okay, this is like crap,
this is a bunch of I mean, she's trying to
make a living. I understand, you know, and I liked
some of the things she said, and I thought it
was worth the money just to talk about my dad. Okay,
(26:47):
but that like really threw me for a loop.
Speaker 2 (26:50):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I was like, oh my god.
Speaker 1 (26:52):
And then I bought this really cool sweatshirt and then
Evan and Faith were like judging me. They're like, do
you have that kind of money to spend? I thought
we were to save Evans. I'm ever going to save
the money to know to it that a nice restaurant like Evans.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
Zip it.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You guys, stop judging me, because judge she's right, Well,
I got this badass sweatshirt for thirty bucks. Big deal,
thirty bucks.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Maybe you should stop sprom doing so much money. It's funny.
Fortune tellers never tell you to be financially responsible, so weird.
Don't you think that would come up in your fortune?
Speaker 1 (27:24):
It's so odd. I almost had that woman call in
to give us a real tarot cardcase, you know, like
I always try to do it.
Speaker 3 (27:32):
I'm imposing a new rule. You guys need to screen
guests by me first. I need to be able to
approve them first. Even, yes, even I know one guest
that was like, oh, there have been multiple.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Turn down the sound, give me one more.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I honestly, if I went through all them, I probably
most of them there, both of yours, I probably wouldn't.
I probably would act it.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
You know what. It's your turn to bring in a guest. No, yeah, no, yeah,
are you part of this podcast?
Speaker 3 (28:03):
I am, but I don't slicit guests.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Do you have an idea for a good guest?
Speaker 3 (28:09):
No, I don't think we need guests that often.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
Well, I Omar was awesome.
Speaker 2 (28:15):
He was awesome, He's amazing.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
He was one of the select He was one of
the I would say, one of the select few that
gets into the higher echelons. Good guests, Yes, you've had.
We have a lot of really mediocre guests.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Wow, you just offended a lot of people's fine. Okay,
well that's the norm for you. Apparently again it's me
why hold on nothing.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
I'm working on a couple of good guests, right, I
will scream them first.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
We need to scream them. Eric.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Also, I'm going to say one word and you'll want
you'll be like, get them on. Can's what that word is? This?
Speaker 1 (28:52):
Okay Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
I'm I'm I'm I'm not being excited about anything, he
says either.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
Yea, Oh, you will be when I say it.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
Okay, say the word.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Take a guess celebrity. Yes, okay, so random, like as
celebrity that we've never heard of.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
Mmmm, well you probably haven't, but there's hundreds of thousands
of people that have.
Speaker 3 (29:17):
Just say the word.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Well, I'm going to get what will this person be
in this seat or on the phone? No, on the phone?
Speaker 1 (29:27):
Is this person from Hollywood?
Speaker 3 (29:29):
What's the name.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
I'm going to give you the Okay, So I want
you to guess the genre TV Uh musician no, movie
star yes?
Speaker 3 (29:45):
Actor or crew actor. Yeah, that's what you call it.
Speaker 2 (29:50):
Crew actor?
Speaker 3 (29:51):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (29:53):
A young or older it's gonna be older, character actor yes,
Christian Bale No, so we aren't going to know this guy.
Speaker 2 (30:05):
Now I want you to do a genre horror.
Speaker 3 (30:10):
No, please not be comedy.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
I think it could be depending on the film. Could
be depending on the film. Jason, Nope, Oh god, I
wish we got to work on things.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
I guess like that.
Speaker 2 (30:26):
Okay, I'm going to say one word.
Speaker 1 (30:28):
Okay, do it, and you are both gonna be like,
I never going to end this show.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
So one is an actress, one is an actor.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Is the same word for both of them or do
they have their own word?
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Yes? And that word is porn.
Speaker 3 (30:45):
I am gonna I'm gonna vedo this right.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
Nope, it's gonna be good.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I don't think we should have porn stars.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Oh yeah, Wait, let's just talk this out a little bit.
We're not going to know the person because I don't
watch porn. I don't know about you. You know, I
don't know, but I.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
Used to have to order porn, so I had to
go to the.
Speaker 1 (31:07):
To know about the profession. I don't I would be interested.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
Yes, is that really something we want?
Speaker 2 (31:13):
And they're like both fascinating. They're both fascinating.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (31:17):
What's our show about entertainment? Porn? Adult entertainment?
Speaker 1 (31:22):
Like, what is it like to be an adult entertainer?
How did you get into it?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Well, I take my dick out and I put it
in the way, way way more because I needed money
and I didn't have any reservations about showing tell us.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
About the first time. Were you scared that?
Speaker 3 (31:37):
I was really hard and I put my how do
you get hard?
Speaker 2 (31:40):
He's written a book?
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Come on? Is this.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
She's written a book? I'm really not sure. She's written
a book. And he's had a fascinating life, he's great.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
What's what's the chick's name?
Speaker 2 (31:53):
What's the saying right now?
Speaker 3 (31:54):
What's first? Just gonna be the first name? D that's
just day dick sucker like d e.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
No, let's just put it on you, Donna.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Okay, okay, you know what. We'll talk about it. But
I am in, I'm in, Brian, are we are we
kind of getting you in a little bit. Are the
fascination of it just like interest of it? Or now
you're looking them up?
Speaker 3 (32:40):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (32:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (32:43):
Right, you know, if you guys want to, that's fine.
I wouldn't recommend it.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Oh okay, that'll be good.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
I'm just not I'm really not intolight.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
I'm not either, but I'm just interesting.
Speaker 3 (32:54):
Curious either though.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
No, but this is the thing. I love reading biographies,
read hers, and it's just so fascinating to see what
makes people do.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
What's Erica going to be on with the Baywatch stuff? Oh?
Speaker 2 (33:08):
I just talked to her. So we're we're scheduling.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Okay, now that would be good. Let's do that again. Okay, anyway,
you guys, so coming up, we have some great guests
lined up.
Speaker 3 (33:18):
It sounds all we have talked about.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
This episode is literally just I know it's all Laura's fault.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
It's your fault. The rabbit hole always it was.
Speaker 3 (33:28):
It was partially your fault.
Speaker 2 (33:29):
It was part yeah, see.
Speaker 3 (33:30):
Because you're like I was on hinge.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
Yeah, hi, pot it's kettle.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Can I get them?
Speaker 1 (33:38):
And then you all right?
Speaker 3 (33:39):
Let's end this.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
So hard?
Speaker 1 (33:42):
Oh wait, here's a story, one more story, is it? Okay, Brian's.
Speaker 3 (33:48):
I'm skeptical. No, I'm just scared of how like we've
already derailed pretty far. This is a good place to
end it now that we're keeping it.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
It would be a good little bow on.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
I'm worried we get work.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Is this something that I'll be like the bank?
Speaker 2 (33:59):
Yes? Okay, okay, because it could only happen to me.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Oh okay, I like this.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
So on Friday afternoon, I went to the grocery store.
Now I'm not gonna say which one, just in case
there was one. Yes, I know your stores. I just
ran in for a couple of things, and I had
a I had a bag in my car that's yellow
(34:27):
and it's got I thought it was a lot sturdier,
like a tote bag. Yeah, and it turns out I've
used it before. But it turns out I had a
few too many things in it and it's big. But
the material for the straps apparently was not strong enough
to hold what I had. So as I got to
(34:50):
the store, I realized the pants I was wearing I
forgot to put a belt on, so I was constantly
I had to carry my phone my keys because they
kept falling down. Okay, that plays a very important part
of this story. Okay, I check out, I'm on my
(35:10):
way to my car. The strap snaps, the bag hits
the ground, and everything in the bag starts just rolling
everywhere in every direction. You can imagine, down the driveway,
to the side, to the right behind me. I'm frantically,
(35:33):
you know, I dropped my phone, drop my keys, drop
the bag, and frantically bending over trying to pick things up,
and my pants.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Fall down and you don't wear underwear. Nope, did mister
happy come out?
Speaker 2 (35:48):
He did?
Speaker 3 (35:49):
So I just want you to I just want you
to know that technically.
Speaker 2 (35:52):
Buns out, guns out, technically exposure, and that can get
you arrested.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Also, and if there's kids present, I can get you
on a very certain list.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Thank god, thank god.
Speaker 1 (36:05):
Did anybody see the front part?
Speaker 3 (36:07):
No, you should just you should wear underwears all.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
Keep that, keep it nice and tight. You know what
I'm saying. Don't let it get said. Oh dude, see
this is what I really wish. You would let me
install a camera in your room? No because no? Yeah
what No, this is because the one time he told
the story, but because he sleeps naked and when he
freaked out because like a spider crawled across his face
(36:32):
and you were ran out of the room, that out
That would be hysterical scene, you run naked with your
wiener flapping around. Well, we tixelated, of course, but uh yeah,
put underwear on, dude, that's like say, because you oftentimes
have VPO. Anyway, I'm gonna end on that visible penis
(36:53):
line in his thinly thin thin shorts.
Speaker 3 (36:58):
God, no, they weren't shorts. They were just we still
couldn't escape the dick.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
I know it's time to end, all right. We'll be
back next week.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
Oh and Clia from Dolphace Class, Yes, I wore last night.
I went to dinner with a friend in Coronado and
I wore my sweatshirt that she that.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
You got me, Yes, the one with a girl in
the gun. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Then I got mobbed.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
So Clia, Claire, you are onto something girl.
Speaker 2 (37:25):
I texted her because I was like, get ready. I
don't know how many people I gave her. Oh that's
awesome website too, So yeah, good for you.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
All right, we love her all right, guys, thank you
so much and love your podcast.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
Love your podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
I love you, my sweet babies. Bye bye.
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