December 9, 2025 • 38 mins
Laura has the most humiliating re-gifting story with a twist. You won't believe what she did at a friend's Christmas party and how she got caught! Erik and Laura relive the time Erik made her pee her pants from laughing after an equally, but different, pubic embarrassment incident. Since we're getting to know our new producer, Claire, we decided to bust out the card game "How Deep Will You Go." These are questions about love, regret, good and bad memories and things that will never leave your mind. Don't get it twisted, though...the answers lead to hilarious stories. Coming up in just weeks, the Third Annual Terrible Temu Christmas. Laura and Erik have to try to out-gross each other with a deep dive into the dark side of Temu. A can't-miss show every year. Loser has to wear and show off gifts at the grocery store up the street....all captured on video. We sure love you guys. Love your podcast!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello, Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark. Happy Week, Happy
first week of December. December Night starts on tomorrow. It
is on. The holidays are on. We're in it. We're
in the thick of it.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
God, your Christmas presents should be arriving any day.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Oh okay, this is Laura Cane after Dark. By the way,
thank you for listening. I'm Laura Kane with Erica Rimer.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Gosh, you're very beautiful Kane.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Thank you, You're welcome. Wow at Christmas Elf. Thank you
producer Claire, Hi, Claire, thank you for being here and
running the show for us. We appreciate that more than
you ever know. And I'm so glad we found you. Okay,
so we're going to play how deep will you go?
(00:48):
It's a card game, it's like a question game, and
we haven't really busted out like some deep ones with
Claire yet. So we're going to get to know her
a little bit better and maybe us even.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
More so than we want to know.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
I know, maybe you don't want to know any more
about us. You probably don't want to know one more
thing about us, but you're gonna find out. Okay, Now
I want to know, am I the drama. I know
I was the drama in this situation during the holidays, Okay, okay, Like,
for example, have you ever been caught regifting something?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I personally haven't have, Okay, but I did get for
sure got a regift and it.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Was what wasn't.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
I was at a party and it was, you know,
one of those things that had like a thirty dollars
limit or whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Yeah, white elephant or whatever.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
No I don't, which I can't stand anyway, but.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
The white elephants are the winter just wills to get
something crazy, well, or.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
You can steal, which I ough. And this thing I picked,
and of course nobody wanted it. And it was a
mug that had a date on it from like five
years ago, so it was like Brazil twenty nineteen, and
(02:13):
I'm all.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
That terrible, okay one time. This is a long time ago.
I was. We were newly married. I got married when
I was twenty two, so I hadn't been like twenty three,
twenty four. And we went to a Christmas party at
a friend's house. She was older, a little older. It
was more fancy. So we brought a nice bottle of wine.
(02:40):
So maybeing the alcoholic that I wasn't continued to be
noticed that at the end of the party the bottle
that I brought hadn't been touched at all. I hadn't
been opened, hadn't been touched. So I'm like, I'm taking
back that bottle because nobody used it and I want that, okay,
(03:06):
So I stick it underneath my coat. And we were
all the people were at the door, saying, oh bye,
we're gonna go. Oh it's so nice meeting you. Oh yeah,
I'm nice, meaning you too, how great? And co bam,
right right in front of her doorstep. The bottle drops
and breaks into a million pieces. There's red wine all
(03:29):
over her door mat. And I always looked up and
I just want I don't really know what to say
at this point.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
What did I say?
Speaker 1 (03:44):
I don't even remember what I said or how she reacted.
I think I blurred that out of my memory completely.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Oh my god, that is hilarious.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Of course that had to happen to me, Oh my god,
that is I remember one time we did a white
elephant and like a true white elephant, and I ended
up with this statue of a cobbler what like I
brought home Like this statue was like like this big
(04:13):
a guy, like pounding on you.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Stupid.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
But I want I want our Coco White Elephant party
to be like crazy like that like last year. We
were here last year. You weren't here last night. Why
are you a buzzkill? Oh because you're working late at night? Yeah, okay,
that's right. Oh you were, Oh you're working during the
party afternoon. Remember that's right. I ended up stealing Veronica's
(04:42):
like little stuffed animal headphones. They were cute, but I
forgot what I bought. I bought something funny and our
one of our old anchors got it. It was hilarious.
But so I won that. But anyway, so that was
my regifting. So I was the drama there. And you
know what, I'm sorry, but group texts during the holidays,
(05:02):
I can't. I cannot, I can't keep up. I well,
you're that doesn't surprise me about you, because you're not
the best text.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
In the world, the worst he.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
Texts with one finger. A heart fell. I'm sure my mom,
what my mom sent you was probably beautiful, and it
takes her a long time to text. She probably wrote
you like three paragraphs and you probably wrote t Why No,
I didn't Okay, and a heart, ty and a heart.
(05:36):
That's like all you get from Eric. But these group texts,
like if you don't keep up, you're so far behind
that I just go okay done. I can't. I'll just
have somebody in the group text text me on the
down low and tell me what's up because I can't
keep up.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
So this was the most that I think I've written
to anybody lately. To your mom, your mom said, good morning, Eric,
I was thinking about you today. Your story was heart wrenching.
I love you. And I said good morning, Oh, thank you.
It was good seeing you. I love you too.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
Wow. That was a full sentence.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
It was two full sentences.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Dude, that's amazing. I know I do my mom. So yeah,
those are two things that And have you ever gone
to a party and hidden food for later, like like
snug food in your first or anything like that. No, okay,
I used to do this, not at parties. But do
(06:34):
you remember soup Plantation? Yes, okay. When I was in college,
my dad would come down and take me and my
roommates when I was in the dorms to suit Plantation
and they had these big ass muffins.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Oh yeah, I remember that.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
I used to wear sweatpants. When my dad would come
take us to God, we would like ten muffins down
my sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Oh well, god, so we have like.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
Muffins for breakfast for the next like two weeks.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Oh, they were probably dry.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
But like what what why did I steal? I stole?
I stole. I'm a thief. I stole like a dozen.
I probably stole a dozen. They were in my big
fat sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Oh my god, well you stole my heart.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
So you are Oh you are gross. That was gross.
That was gross. And finally, before we play this game,
which is the question game, which is how deep will
you go? Do you have any predictions for twenty twenty six?
Do you have any like things that you thought of
but that like this is going to happen to me,
(07:41):
or this is going to happen to the world, and
this is going to happen to someone I know, or
this is going to happen happen twenty twenty six anybody.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I never make a prediction. I never do a what
is that thing that they do with the Oh.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
You don't do resolutions? No, I never.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Stick to them because I don't smoke, I don't drink.
I don't do drugs. I don't gamble like I'm boring.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
So yeah, I know you don't do any of those things.
I needed to make a New Years Maybe.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
My resolution should be I'll be a better Texter. That'll
could be good.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
I'll be better, I'll be nicer to customer service representatives.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
I'll be more.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
You got to get back to the zen part. You
kind of flared up a little bit there when recently,
well that the whole road rage thing was a little
flare up.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Well that wasn't for that was for an asshole, I know.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
But I'm talking in general. You were you were talking
in general being more zen. Yeah, you had a little
flare up.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
Well that was well deserved.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Well I don't know, but that made me nervous because
I don't want you to get like shot or anything
like that. My god, my god, that's all we need.
I can't do this by myself, and.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Claire, you could just you could just taxi during me
me and just prop me up here on the couch. Okay,
I'm sure that wouldn't be disturbing to anyone ohing at all.
Just make sure they don't make me look like a freak.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
We'll just put wax figure like Madam Trusseaude.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Oh for sure.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Anyway, all right, we're gonna play the Gamelaire could be
my voice.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
Hey, everybody, welcome to Hey, Hey, everybody, welcome to Lower.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Kane after dark.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
I like her voice better lower.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
My name's Eric Rimmer Lower. I got in a crazy
road rage this incident.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
The other day.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
That's Eric taking a dump because I could talk like
a man.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
It's starting for Oh double tell tell Claire? Do you
do your voice?
Speaker 5 (09:37):
Oh Claire, Okay, you're kind of hot. My name is Chad.
I'm fourteen, and I love to do video games. And uh,
I don't know. I don't know what your deal is,
but I think you're I don't know, you want to
hang out sometime.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
That activated my fight or flight response.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
This boy away from me.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Oh my god, that's amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
I used to do that, like call in and be Chad,
fourteen year old Chad, I like I love. I used
to say really bad things that she said.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Oh my god, God, anyway.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
It sounds better on the phone. But yeah, I can go, No,
I can go. Let me see.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
Hello. My name is Eric Rimmer. My name is Eric Ramor.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Is that deep?
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Lurking I've got horrmone problem.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
You sound like the dude from that Lady God Got
Bradley Cooper movie, remember all, although what is it called
stars Born or whatever? Yeah, okay, now we're gonna play
a game. How deeply you go? No, Neil Bradley Cooper.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
Bradley Coopernhardt, Oh, I thought you were talking about the
broth that.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Oh yeah, he does too. He has a grumbling voice.
But Bradley Cooper kind of had Bradley Cooper, by the way,
what happened to know?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
He had an upper bleff.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
See that's why you're so amazing. You don't look like
you don't want to get an upper one.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
He now looks like Barry Manilow.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Oh no, brad Pitt, don't go there.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
Brad Pitt had it done. But he had it done right.
He went to the same one that Lindsay Lohan and.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Did Lindsay Lohan get done?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
She had that done too, allegedly upper the upper up?
That thing that they're only doing in Turkey?
Speaker 1 (11:39):
What thing are they only doing?
Speaker 2 (11:42):
What facelift that Chris Jenner had done?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
What is it? It's literally where they I mean, she
looks younger than the sisters.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
It's crazy, yes, but I mean, how come they don't
do it in the States.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Because they haven't perfected it here yet.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Well, what do they take your face off?
Speaker 2 (12:00):
I don't know what they do, but I'm kind of
living for it.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Is it in? What where do they listen?
Speaker 2 (12:06):
If somebody could take this face off and put a
good one off.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Like.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
Stretch it up and stretch it back.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Sure, God, I like I look like I'm wearing a
paper bag.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
But when you say I look like I sleep up
upside down, banging upside down, let.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Me tell you I was so excited to have gotten
eight hours of sleep last night. Oh good, that's why
I don't look like I'm half in the bag.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
And your uvula didn't go down your throat, like.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
I'm taking these pills now and you so.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Now you're taking blood pressure pills.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Oh yeah, I'm a frickin pharmacy right now.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And you're thing the coughing thing, the acid reflex pille,
you're taking the now the uvula pill.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, so I take this, you put it? Oh are
you Drew?
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Tell me about the pillow? You drool on your pillows?
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh my god? Well, no, but you it's a little
pill that you It's got like a one side's white
and then the other side's like a tan, and it's
textured and you put it against your gum and it
holds it there. But it produces saliva all night so
that you don't get a dry mouth. And apparently my
(13:20):
snoring has.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
But what about the wetness? I mean, do you like
when you're on your side, waters is.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Flying fall out of your mouth. I literally wake up
in the morning and I'm all, oh my god, because
it's wet.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Would you rather have that or like, aren't cut?
Speaker 2 (13:37):
No, I would rather have a moist mouth.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
A moist mouth, yes, any day? Oh my god. Clear
one time this made me laugh so hard on the podcast,
I literally peed my pants a tiny bit. I was
asked to speak. It's like graduation of It was like
(14:02):
foster uh, teenagers that had graduated from college or going
to school, getting scholarships, whatever it was. It was a
really cool thing and I was there to speak and
kind of tell my story a little bit and give
them some inspiration. Well, I get nervous when I get
up in front of people like I I when people
(14:23):
are looking at me and I'm talking, like I get
really nervous sharing my story or anything like that. So
when I get nervous, I get trimel.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
This was so bad.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So I know, water up at the podium and I
get start talking. I could tell I could start feeling
my mouth like the water is like it's just drying
up right, I'm starting to talk and my mouth is
so dry that my lip is starting to stick to
my tooth, and I'm like hoping that like nobody is
(14:56):
noticing that when I'm like halfway through, right, was mimicking
what I was sounding like you have to do Preclaire, Like, Okay,
so this is me, This is me giving my speech
to this whole group of graduating people i'd.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Like to think.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Are coming. It's such an honor to be here, even
amount much.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Water in there. I just want to say it was
really great. Know that how too much live.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Story?
Speaker 1 (15:53):
It was so bad.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I really shitt water.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Was dying. I was dying. I was praying that they
but they it was.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
It was so funny. I think you really did pet
your pants that day.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Oh my god. I laughed because they were making fun
of me so hard, so funny. Okay, so we're going
to play a game called how Deep will You Go?
Hd WYG. Okay, So Claire has a little pile in
front of her. Eric and I are going to share
a pile, and Eric, I want you to go first,
(16:33):
So just pick off the top and you got to
answer the question.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
What is the most painful thing you've ever been told? Oh?
That's easy. That was just recently.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Oh my god, yeah, sure.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
What when that asshole said I hope you die of
cancer just like your mom. That that's a no brainer.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
That is the worst thing anybody can say. That happened
like less than a month ago.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Super villain behavior.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Are you Lord Valdemore? I know, like, are you like
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Just just lord? Asshole?
Speaker 4 (17:10):
And you just like are free in the world, just
like be in that way?
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Like can you like yeah for real? Take care of
yourself with a mind like that?
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Oh my god?
Speaker 1 (17:22):
All right, Claire, your turn. Uh what have.
Speaker 4 (17:27):
People always misunderstood about you? That's tough because I got
to know what people think of me.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
What do you think people think of you? Good question.
I when you walked into the newsroom for the first time,
what do you think people thought of you?
Speaker 4 (17:44):
I think my concern is that people think I'm being
like quirky and funny on purpose, but I'm not. I
just can't help it that I am this way.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Okay, but do they do you think that they have
a misunderstanding that maybe you're quirky and funny and there
for not as smart as you are. Uh I don't
so you think they underestimate your intelligence?
Speaker 4 (18:07):
Sometimes people are a little too surprised when I'm good
at things. Yeah, yeah, okay, Like that's awesome, Thank you
so much.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Yeah, don't be too surprised. Yeah, thanks a lot. Yeah
that's a good one. Yeah, I agree with that one.
What is something you are really passionate about? But don't
tell anyone. I'm really passionate about about painting and drawing
(18:36):
And I just bought shopping for you for our TEAMU Christmas.
You're getting it. I found this watercolor of kit and
I'm all excited because has like lessons and like and
I'm really excited because I love to paint. I don't
know that that's kind of a dumb answer, but that's
that's my answer.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Why did you say I'm getting it?
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Oh you're no, You're not getting that you're getting it?
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Oh game on?
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Oh, game on?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Claire, you are gonna.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
This is gonna be our fourth year. This is the
third Horrific Terrible Temu. We call it team. It's Temu
Terrible Timu Christmas. And we have to try to out
terrible each other with the gifts because there are some
things on that website that are like unbelievably funny and
(19:27):
crazy ass like you've never seen anything like it. Yeah,
we go to the dark web of Temo.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
We do.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
We find things that are so horrific.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
So I got our earrings last year that were bloody
tail blonds, used condoms or something. It was so it
was so horrific.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Yeah, and then yeah, I got him. When did I
get you?
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
I got him fake cigarettes that you actually blow on.
They blow smoke. We have cigarettes you we had. Oh.
I got him a red mullet. I got him some
suret Oh. I got on a pair of pants. It
has my face right on his cross so open, you know. Anyway,
But I won. But I gave him.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Oh, I got him.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Cross with toes the stick out because he hates toes
and he hates crocs.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Oh wait, no, I already already answered.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Sorry, what is the most humbling experience you've had. Oh
my god, are you getting all the deep ones? Dude,
I would have to say, taking care of my mom, yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Humble has in like it humbled you to see how
fragile life is.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Yeah, and to not you know, because I'm kind of like,
let's go like I you know, I don't like waiting around.
I don't like being in trapping that kind of stuff.
So like when you're when somebody is super slow and you're.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Having to patience. Yeah, that's a good answer, her, Claire.
You got a lot of really beautiful feedback from.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I know, people were loving.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
They really thank you.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Uh what are you afraid of passing down to your kids?
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Sounds easy? The mental illness Wait a minute, whoa, the anxiety,
all things bad brain, the bad never stops running brain,
bad brain.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
The bad My four children didn't ask for the bad brain?
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Did you get passed down?
Speaker 4 (21:37):
The bad brains on my mom's side is a little strange,
and it's because we all have a little bit of
the bad brain.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Oh that is funny, God, I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:51):
What are you currently addicted to? Well, that's easy. No,
come on, we have food food in the kitchen yet tonight?
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Oh door dash I can't I.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
Even my dog food. I hate the grocery store so much.
I door dashed my groceries I did. I don't even
get groceries half the time. I cannot set foot in
a grocery store anymore. Like I don't know if it's
like it's almost like a form of agoraphobia. I can't
set foot in a grocery store. It's too overwhelming for me.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
Grocery stores are really deeply it's.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Too money choices. I'm glad you get me, Claire.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
This just gave me a brilliant idea. We're gonna play
a game where the loser has to go grocery shopping.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
That'll be the team in the wait? Is that? Is
that the what's the bet? Because the bet we always
have to have a bet. It has to go walk
around and go shop. But you like to shop, but
I can't.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
I don't like grocery shopping.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
All right, Whoever loses has to put on whatever you get,
hold whatever you get, go at what nine o'clock at night,
up to pavilions up here and go buy one thing.
And you're being I'm gonna film it.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
No, I'm gonna film it. No, you're gonna get it.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
You're gonna get it? Is it?
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Oh yeah, oh my god, oh god, oh dude, this
is like all what is.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
The last did you just pick these up for me?
Speaker 1 (23:46):
He did?
Speaker 2 (23:47):
What is the last time you cried? And why last Monday?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
I know because he read his moms ge eulogy for
the first time.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Can I get a nice know?
Speaker 1 (24:00):
We'll see Claire.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
When asked how are you? How often do you answer truthfully?
I always say I'm good, doesn't matter how I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
So most of the time you're lying No. Often I'm
doing good, okay.
Speaker 4 (24:14):
But even if I'm not doing good, I just say
I'm being good.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
You know what? Sometimes I say I'm not great. I
wish I did that. But but then that is that
spurs on a conversation, Yeah, don't want to talk about it.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
And then also like it feels like an automatic conversation.
I'm not even thinking about how I'm doing. The conversation
just goes.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
How are you good? How are you good?
Speaker 4 (24:32):
And then we move on.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Yeah, I know that the hall and we have long
halways are guilty. So if you see somebody thrown down
and you're going this way, you have to like, look
at them, look at them, look at them. Hi, Hi,
how are you doing fine? How are you doing fine?
How you're doing anything? Cross? It's like the longest hallway times.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
I just look make out contact and do one of these.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Yeah, I know, are like, hey, why are I doing that?
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Whatever? Okay? Oh my god, well this is easy. If
you could bring someone back, who would it be? Why then?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Oh, yeah, your dad.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
It would be my daddy, because he died when he
was just sixty years old, and that was just too soon.
He'd probably really be grumpy at this age because he
was a stress case anyway, just about. He always was
worried about us, and he was ahead of his time.
Like back in the day, Remember we never wore seat belts.
We would like sit up at the back of the
(25:28):
you know, the back of the car window, and do
all sorts of crazy things. My dad always made us
wear seat belts, and he always made us flass. That
was before his time. It was before his time anyway.
My dad was the funniest man that ever lived in
the most dry, witty way.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
I would have gotten along with him so well.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
Oh my god. He would make people laugh so hard,
like and not like Dad joke, laugh, just like he'd
make you. He is the one that made me so
okay with being laughing at myself, not taking myself too seriously,
because he would roast us so hard.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
It was so funny.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Roast my mom was so funny.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Okay, uh, Eric, what have you done that you're proud of? Oh?
While I went to college, I've DoD the podcast. I
have a good job.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Well you're you're high falutin tutin. You're sure proud of yourself.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Aren't you.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I got up this morning, I had a good.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Breakfast, I had am I.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Had like five of them as usual. Oh my god, Well,
those are things to be proud of. Yes, and last Thursday.
I'm very proud of you from last Thursday.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Oh, thank you?
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Okay, Claire hi uh.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
Describe a memory that feels like a movie.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Oo, oh my goodness.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
What kind of a movie that's good?
Speaker 4 (27:07):
That truly could be anything depends what movie is. Oh,
this is a cute story. When I was in the
eighth grade, my the boy that I had a crush
on throughout all of middle school, confessed that he had
a crush on me too, that we were in like
with each other in Paris, with a poem.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Really in eighth grade, he wrote you a poem?
Speaker 4 (27:33):
No, we were physically in Paris.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Oh wait, what were in Paris?
Speaker 4 (27:37):
WHOA presented me with a poem?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
That is a movie that I would never watch because
I'm not that kind. But that's sweet. I don't like
rom comms, hate some, although I did like Serendipity that one,
but and I liked say anything that was before Wait,
(28:01):
before your time? What conspiracy theory do you wait? Did
I just go? You went? What conspiracy theory?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Do you believe in UFOs?
Speaker 1 (28:09):
Full on UFOs? They're here, we have biologics, we have bodies,
we have crashed crafts. They're in the freaking ocean, they're
in the sky. They have we have reverse technology. And
let me tell you something, Oh my God, tell you something.
Speaker 5 (28:25):
You know.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
What's terrifying, Claire. What's terrifying is China can also have
these things that we supposedly have. No if they learn
how to reverse uh jet propulsion, if they knew, if
they learn how these crafts work before we do, we're screw.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Oh no, what's that going to do for us? Ordering
from Temu?
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I know we might not be able to This.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Might be our last Hurrah, the gifts count.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Okay, one more round then we'll call it a night.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
Is there closure that you never got to have?
Speaker 4 (29:03):
That's just crazy?
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Is this? But you had a quote? Did you have quote?
You have closure? But okay, is there anybody else you
never had closure with? Any of that? Well, you kind
of had closure with your brother, your closure with your
brother in a sense. Yeah, but not the way you
want it?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
No, But I mean no, not that I can think of.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Okay, yeah, Claire, Yeah, Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
If there's something you've been wanting to let out, let
it out?
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Is there something that's really hoping?
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I could summon the burp in that moment, but that
would have been amazing.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Oh, you can't make yourself burbal on command.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
I could probably summon up something.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
I don't know if we're gonna make audio poison by
asking that question.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
But no, I can't do it. I can't. I can't
fart on command. I can't, Oh, bourb on man.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
I could. I could sum up something for you.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
No, do not. Cautures are not pleasant.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
No, No, oh come on?
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Is there something like you want? It doesn't have to
be like negative?
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Oh yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
We're all.
Speaker 4 (30:20):
I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Well, you know what, let it out. That's what I've
been wanting to let it out. Watchless. Okay, I put
myself on the couch. Hey wait, hey, high Claire, I'm
fully up to the couch.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
I'm fully and then if somebody displaces me right.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Yes, yes, oh my god, you fit exactly. Wait no,
go back, come back, my new cows. Now we're cooking. Yes,
that's what I've been.
Speaker 4 (30:52):
Dying to do the whole show.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
Oh my god, you're brad. Don't make her do that.
Don't make her do that.
Speaker 4 (31:06):
I'm sexually harassing my coworker.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
I know you are. I'm gonna San Antonio, don't. I'm booking.
I'm booking tonight.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
She's gonna personalized parking spot. What you're talking about?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
What do you owe yourself?
Speaker 2 (31:23):
Grace?
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Absolutely? I owe myself. I just need to give myself
a little bit of a break because I'm hard on myself.
I'm really really, really really really hard on myself. You are,
But then again, I ordered door Dash every night.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
So that kind of cancels each other out right.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I mean, so I'm good to my I'm good to myself.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
That's different.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
I'm hard on myself professionally and emotionally, emotionally and and
I'm also hard on myself. Like when I look in
the mirror, I'm hard on myself. When I see things,
I pick out the negative things, and that's I don't
I owe myself more kindness.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I guess why would you look in the mirror and
be hard on yourself?
Speaker 1 (32:11):
Because there's there's there's Sorry, you may not see them,
but there are flaws. There are flaws. Oh, there are flaws.
Have lipstick on my teeth right now, for sure.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
I I can't imagine. I have the heater nose, but
your nose fits so perfectly with your face.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
I would never change my nose. Don't get no, I'm
not doing that. I have my dad's nose, and my
dad's nose I'm going to keep. I don't know, just
stuff like I just feel like, oh my god, look
at these wrinkles or this thing.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
I when I say that, I look like I sleep
hanging upside down like a bat. I'm not kidding. Sometimes.
I know there have been time times that I've gone
to work and I'm like, oh, I wake up in
the morning, I look at myself. I'm dressed up, and
I'm like, you know, you don't what happened. And I'll
be at work and somebody will pop into my office
(33:09):
and they'll be all rough night, and I.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Know, I hate that.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
I was like I thought I looked today, but apparently not.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
You look tired, That's the one I get.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Sometimes you look.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
Like like nine hours of the plus and I haven't
find I'm not tired. I'm fully awake, Like do we
have a problem, buddy, Like what the hell? Yeah? Okay,
do you want to do one more round? And then
we'll call it a great okay, Claire?
Speaker 4 (33:39):
Yeah, if you could remind everyone of just one thing,
what would it be. We all got to be trying
new things all the time, and I feel like people
forget that that's good.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
That's really good. Not only does that keep your brain strong,
but like I can attest to that because I mean,
you're younger, because and you're like more spongy than we are,
or like more dryed sponges rain elasticity. Yeah, you're like
you're like a nice fresh sponge that comes out of
(34:15):
the package. It's still a little wet, you know.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
It's like my sponge is so dry you could dunk
at the ocean and it wouldn't even absorb people.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
I've learned that at this age, I can still learn
like complicated things, and I feel good about that. So, yes,
that's a great answer.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
That's a really good answer.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
What do you wish people knew about you that I would?
If I had the money, I would give money to
everybody in the world. I swear to God. I would
spoil everyone. I would. I would. I would do the
(34:56):
thing that Jesse did in Breaking Bad, where he had
the hundreds and he just went through neighborhoods and just
like I'd pay for people's Christmases, just like Tommy does
with breaking an entery, and help families I'm going to
I'd help people pay for, like, you know, funerals that
they couldn't help pay for, I'd help. I'd help all
(35:20):
the charities that needs to help. Volunteering. I don't know.
I probably would help them monetarily. I'd help them, you
know what, I find all the money in the world,
I probably would help. I would volunteer too. I need
to do something with my time.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
So it's good to know, because if this happens when
you and I are sharing a bed, I'm.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Going to share my money too.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Yeah, you'll be paid for your own hair extensions.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
Oh no, no, no, that was an edict. You made
that promise to me.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
That deal is null and boyd if you wind up
becoming Bobo Rockefeller.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
Yes, no, wait did we We are not being Oh
okay Lobo Rockefeller.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Jesus, I want a different one.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
Okay, okay, you can all right, let's not get so awful.
I described the lowest moment in your life. We did
there already. We just didn't. We just did that. Okay.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
What what was the happiest point in your life? Car
go boom boom meeting you?
Speaker 1 (36:27):
Okay, thank you. That's very sweet, but untrue. What's the
happiest moment of your life?
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Meeting Claire.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
Like a month and a half. Yeah, that was the
happiest moment of his life. His entire life had.
Speaker 4 (36:42):
All been leading up to that moment.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
No. Probably the happiest moment of my life would be
when I was in junior high and I was teased
terribly in school and somebody was tea see me, and
this group of girls came and told the dude off.
(37:05):
And then we've been friends ever since. And that includes
Marlon there and Marla, theres Tina.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
They all came to rescue. And now you guys are
I love that story?
Speaker 2 (37:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Mm hmm is it your turn? That's cute. I thought
we said one more round? Did he start?
Speaker 2 (37:24):
No, you started with Claire. I started, so you you
just skipped me.
Speaker 4 (37:28):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, you just skipped me. That's all. So now we're good.
Now we're done.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
Okay, okay, great? Great? What was I going to say? No,
I had something profound to say. You did, Yeah, I
don't know. But anyway, how fun a December nights. Good
luck with park well you're not parking at uber and
good luck with the sa at a low tape.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
I will I'm gonna go see her.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
And uh, Claire, you have a great weekend yourself, get
some rest. You're probably working like me. All right, I'll
see there, and uh you guys, thank you so much
for watching and listening. We sure appreciate. We don't ever
take it for granted. Love your podcast. This is where
see Claire, Claire, Claire, see where this I set it up.
(38:17):
I have I put the gift there the podcast. There
we go, it just needed the bow on top. Thank yeah,
love you mis babies
Speaker 2 (38:24):
By Love you guys,
Hello, Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark. Happy Week, Happy
first week of December. December Night starts on tomorrow. It
is on. The holidays are on. We're in it. We're
in the thick of it.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
God, your Christmas presents should be arriving any day.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Oh okay, this is Laura Cane after Dark. By the way,
thank you for listening. I'm Laura Kane with Erica Rimer.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Gosh, you're very beautiful Kane.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Thank you, You're welcome. Wow at Christmas Elf. Thank you
producer Claire, Hi, Claire, thank you for being here and
running the show for us. We appreciate that more than
you ever know. And I'm so glad we found you. Okay,
so we're going to play how deep will you go?
(00:48):
It's a card game, it's like a question game, and
we haven't really busted out like some deep ones with
Claire yet. So we're going to get to know her
a little bit better and maybe us even.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
More so than we want to know.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
I know, maybe you don't want to know any more
about us. You probably don't want to know one more
thing about us, but you're gonna find out. Okay, Now
I want to know, am I the drama. I know
I was the drama in this situation during the holidays, Okay, okay, Like,
for example, have you ever been caught regifting something?
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I personally haven't have, Okay, but I did get for
sure got a regift and it.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Was what wasn't.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
I was at a party and it was, you know,
one of those things that had like a thirty dollars
limit or whatever.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Yeah, white elephant or whatever.
Speaker 2 (01:44):
No I don't, which I can't stand anyway, but.
Speaker 1 (01:47):
The white elephants are the winter just wills to get
something crazy, well, or.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
You can steal, which I ough. And this thing I picked,
and of course nobody wanted it. And it was a
mug that had a date on it from like five
years ago, so it was like Brazil twenty nineteen, and
(02:13):
I'm all.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
That terrible, okay one time. This is a long time ago.
I was. We were newly married. I got married when
I was twenty two, so I hadn't been like twenty three,
twenty four. And we went to a Christmas party at
a friend's house. She was older, a little older. It
was more fancy. So we brought a nice bottle of wine.
(02:40):
So maybeing the alcoholic that I wasn't continued to be
noticed that at the end of the party the bottle
that I brought hadn't been touched at all. I hadn't
been opened, hadn't been touched. So I'm like, I'm taking
back that bottle because nobody used it and I want that, okay,
(03:06):
So I stick it underneath my coat. And we were
all the people were at the door, saying, oh bye,
we're gonna go. Oh it's so nice meeting you. Oh yeah,
I'm nice, meaning you too, how great? And co bam,
right right in front of her doorstep. The bottle drops
and breaks into a million pieces. There's red wine all
(03:29):
over her door mat. And I always looked up and
I just want I don't really know what to say
at this point.
Speaker 3 (03:43):
What did I say?
Speaker 1 (03:44):
I don't even remember what I said or how she reacted.
I think I blurred that out of my memory completely.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Oh my god, that is hilarious.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Of course that had to happen to me, Oh my god,
that is I remember one time we did a white
elephant and like a true white elephant, and I ended
up with this statue of a cobbler what like I
brought home Like this statue was like like this big
(04:13):
a guy, like pounding on you.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Stupid.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
But I want I want our Coco White Elephant party
to be like crazy like that like last year. We
were here last year. You weren't here last night. Why
are you a buzzkill? Oh because you're working late at night? Yeah, okay,
that's right. Oh you were, Oh you're working during the
party afternoon. Remember that's right. I ended up stealing Veronica's
(04:42):
like little stuffed animal headphones. They were cute, but I
forgot what I bought. I bought something funny and our
one of our old anchors got it. It was hilarious.
But so I won that. But anyway, so that was
my regifting. So I was the drama there. And you
know what, I'm sorry, but group texts during the holidays,
(05:02):
I can't. I cannot, I can't keep up. I well,
you're that doesn't surprise me about you, because you're not
the best text.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
In the world, the worst he.
Speaker 1 (05:15):
Texts with one finger. A heart fell. I'm sure my mom,
what my mom sent you was probably beautiful, and it
takes her a long time to text. She probably wrote
you like three paragraphs and you probably wrote t Why No,
I didn't Okay, and a heart, ty and a heart.
(05:36):
That's like all you get from Eric. But these group texts,
like if you don't keep up, you're so far behind
that I just go okay done. I can't. I'll just
have somebody in the group text text me on the
down low and tell me what's up because I can't
keep up.
Speaker 2 (05:53):
So this was the most that I think I've written
to anybody lately. To your mom, your mom said, good morning, Eric,
I was thinking about you today. Your story was heart wrenching.
I love you. And I said good morning, Oh, thank you.
It was good seeing you. I love you too.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
Wow. That was a full sentence.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
It was two full sentences.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Dude, that's amazing. I know I do my mom. So yeah,
those are two things that And have you ever gone
to a party and hidden food for later, like like
snug food in your first or anything like that. No, okay,
I used to do this, not at parties. But do
(06:34):
you remember soup Plantation? Yes, okay. When I was in college,
my dad would come down and take me and my
roommates when I was in the dorms to suit Plantation
and they had these big ass muffins.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Oh yeah, I remember that.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
I used to wear sweatpants. When my dad would come
take us to God, we would like ten muffins down
my sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Oh well, god, so we have like.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
Muffins for breakfast for the next like two weeks.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Oh, they were probably dry.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
But like what what why did I steal? I stole?
I stole. I'm a thief. I stole like a dozen.
I probably stole a dozen. They were in my big
fat sweatpants.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Oh my god, well you stole my heart.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
So you are Oh you are gross. That was gross.
That was gross. And finally, before we play this game,
which is the question game, which is how deep will
you go? Do you have any predictions for twenty twenty six?
Do you have any like things that you thought of
but that like this is going to happen to me,
(07:41):
or this is going to happen to the world, and
this is going to happen to someone I know, or
this is going to happen happen twenty twenty six anybody.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I never make a prediction. I never do a what
is that thing that they do with the Oh.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
You don't do resolutions? No, I never.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Stick to them because I don't smoke, I don't drink.
I don't do drugs. I don't gamble like I'm boring.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
So yeah, I know you don't do any of those things.
I needed to make a New Years Maybe.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
My resolution should be I'll be a better Texter. That'll
could be good.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
I'll be better, I'll be nicer to customer service representatives.
Speaker 2 (08:14):
I'll be more.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
You got to get back to the zen part. You
kind of flared up a little bit there when recently,
well that the whole road rage thing was a little
flare up.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Well that wasn't for that was for an asshole, I know.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
But I'm talking in general. You were you were talking
in general being more zen. Yeah, you had a little
flare up.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
Well that was well deserved.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Well I don't know, but that made me nervous because
I don't want you to get like shot or anything
like that. My god, my god, that's all we need.
I can't do this by myself, and.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Claire, you could just you could just taxi during me
me and just prop me up here on the couch. Okay,
I'm sure that wouldn't be disturbing to anyone ohing at all.
Just make sure they don't make me look like a freak.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
We'll just put wax figure like Madam Trusseaude.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
Oh for sure.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
Anyway, all right, we're gonna play the Gamelaire could be
my voice.
Speaker 4 (09:08):
Hey, everybody, welcome to Hey, Hey, everybody, welcome to Lower.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
Kane after dark.
Speaker 2 (09:13):
I like her voice better lower.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
My name's Eric Rimmer Lower. I got in a crazy
road rage this incident.
Speaker 2 (09:24):
The other day.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
That's Eric taking a dump because I could talk like
a man.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
It's starting for Oh double tell tell Claire? Do you
do your voice?
Speaker 5 (09:37):
Oh Claire, Okay, you're kind of hot. My name is Chad.
I'm fourteen, and I love to do video games. And uh,
I don't know. I don't know what your deal is,
but I think you're I don't know, you want to
hang out sometime.
Speaker 4 (09:55):
That activated my fight or flight response.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
This boy away from me.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Oh my god, that's amazing.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
I used to do that, like call in and be Chad,
fourteen year old Chad, I like I love. I used
to say really bad things that she said.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Oh my god, God, anyway.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
It sounds better on the phone. But yeah, I can go, No,
I can go. Let me see.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
Hello. My name is Eric Rimmer. My name is Eric Ramor.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Is that deep?
Speaker 5 (10:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Lurking I've got horrmone problem.
Speaker 1 (10:36):
You sound like the dude from that Lady God Got
Bradley Cooper movie, remember all, although what is it called
stars Born or whatever? Yeah, okay, now we're gonna play
a game. How deeply you go? No, Neil Bradley Cooper.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
Bradley Coopernhardt, Oh, I thought you were talking about the
broth that.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Oh yeah, he does too. He has a grumbling voice.
But Bradley Cooper kind of had Bradley Cooper, by the way,
what happened to know?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
He had an upper bleff.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
See that's why you're so amazing. You don't look like
you don't want to get an upper one.
Speaker 2 (11:14):
He now looks like Barry Manilow.
Speaker 1 (11:16):
Oh no, brad Pitt, don't go there.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
Brad Pitt had it done. But he had it done right.
He went to the same one that Lindsay Lohan and.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Did Lindsay Lohan get done?
Speaker 2 (11:32):
She had that done too, allegedly upper the upper up?
That thing that they're only doing in Turkey?
Speaker 1 (11:39):
What thing are they only doing?
Speaker 2 (11:42):
What facelift that Chris Jenner had done?
Speaker 1 (11:44):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
What is it? It's literally where they I mean, she
looks younger than the sisters.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
It's crazy, yes, but I mean, how come they don't
do it in the States.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
Because they haven't perfected it here yet.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Well, what do they take your face off?
Speaker 2 (12:00):
I don't know what they do, but I'm kind of
living for it.
Speaker 1 (12:03):
Is it in? What where do they listen?
Speaker 2 (12:06):
If somebody could take this face off and put a
good one off.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Like.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
Stretch it up and stretch it back.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Sure, God, I like I look like I'm wearing a
paper bag.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
But when you say I look like I sleep up
upside down, banging upside down, let.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Me tell you I was so excited to have gotten
eight hours of sleep last night. Oh good, that's why
I don't look like I'm half in the bag.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
And your uvula didn't go down your throat, like.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
I'm taking these pills now and you so.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Now you're taking blood pressure pills.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Oh yeah, I'm a frickin pharmacy right now.
Speaker 1 (12:41):
And you're thing the coughing thing, the acid reflex pille,
you're taking the now the uvula pill.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, so I take this, you put it? Oh are
you Drew?
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Tell me about the pillow? You drool on your pillows?
Speaker 2 (12:57):
Oh my god? Well, no, but you it's a little
pill that you It's got like a one side's white
and then the other side's like a tan, and it's
textured and you put it against your gum and it
holds it there. But it produces saliva all night so
that you don't get a dry mouth. And apparently my
(13:20):
snoring has.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
But what about the wetness? I mean, do you like
when you're on your side, waters is.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Flying fall out of your mouth. I literally wake up
in the morning and I'm all, oh my god, because
it's wet.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Would you rather have that or like, aren't cut?
Speaker 2 (13:37):
No, I would rather have a moist mouth.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
A moist mouth, yes, any day? Oh my god. Clear
one time this made me laugh so hard on the podcast,
I literally peed my pants a tiny bit. I was
asked to speak. It's like graduation of It was like
(14:02):
foster uh, teenagers that had graduated from college or going
to school, getting scholarships, whatever it was. It was a
really cool thing and I was there to speak and
kind of tell my story a little bit and give
them some inspiration. Well, I get nervous when I get
up in front of people like I I when people
(14:23):
are looking at me and I'm talking, like I get
really nervous sharing my story or anything like that. So
when I get nervous, I get trimel.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
This was so bad.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
So I know, water up at the podium and I
get start talking. I could tell I could start feeling
my mouth like the water is like it's just drying
up right, I'm starting to talk and my mouth is
so dry that my lip is starting to stick to
my tooth, and I'm like hoping that like nobody is
(14:56):
noticing that when I'm like halfway through, right, was mimicking
what I was sounding like you have to do Preclaire, Like, Okay,
so this is me, This is me giving my speech
to this whole group of graduating people i'd.
Speaker 2 (15:17):
Like to think.
Speaker 3 (15:19):
Are coming. It's such an honor to be here, even
amount much.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Water in there. I just want to say it was
really great. Know that how too much live.
Speaker 2 (15:46):
Story?
Speaker 1 (15:53):
It was so bad.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
I really shitt water.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Was dying. I was dying. I was praying that they
but they it was.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
It was so funny. I think you really did pet
your pants that day.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Oh my god. I laughed because they were making fun
of me so hard, so funny. Okay, so we're going
to play a game called how Deep will You Go?
Hd WYG. Okay, So Claire has a little pile in
front of her. Eric and I are going to share
a pile, and Eric, I want you to go first,
(16:33):
So just pick off the top and you got to
answer the question.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
What is the most painful thing you've ever been told? Oh?
That's easy. That was just recently.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Oh my god, yeah, sure.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
What when that asshole said I hope you die of
cancer just like your mom. That that's a no brainer.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
That is the worst thing anybody can say. That happened
like less than a month ago.
Speaker 4 (17:02):
Super villain behavior.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
Are you Lord Valdemore? I know, like, are you like
what's going on?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Just just lord? Asshole?
Speaker 4 (17:10):
And you just like are free in the world, just
like be in that way?
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Like can you like yeah for real? Take care of
yourself with a mind like that?
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Oh my god?
Speaker 1 (17:22):
All right, Claire, your turn. Uh what have.
Speaker 4 (17:27):
People always misunderstood about you? That's tough because I got
to know what people think of me.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
What do you think people think of you? Good question.
I when you walked into the newsroom for the first time,
what do you think people thought of you?
Speaker 4 (17:44):
I think my concern is that people think I'm being
like quirky and funny on purpose, but I'm not. I
just can't help it that I am this way.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Okay, but do they do you think that they have
a misunderstanding that maybe you're quirky and funny and there
for not as smart as you are. Uh I don't
so you think they underestimate your intelligence?
Speaker 4 (18:07):
Sometimes people are a little too surprised when I'm good
at things. Yeah, yeah, okay, Like that's awesome, Thank you
so much.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
Yeah, don't be too surprised. Yeah, thanks a lot. Yeah
that's a good one. Yeah, I agree with that one.
What is something you are really passionate about? But don't
tell anyone. I'm really passionate about about painting and drawing
(18:36):
And I just bought shopping for you for our TEAMU Christmas.
You're getting it. I found this watercolor of kit and
I'm all excited because has like lessons and like and
I'm really excited because I love to paint. I don't
know that that's kind of a dumb answer, but that's
that's my answer.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Why did you say I'm getting it?
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Oh you're no, You're not getting that you're getting it?
Speaker 2 (19:01):
Oh game on?
Speaker 1 (19:04):
Oh, game on?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Claire, you are gonna.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
This is gonna be our fourth year. This is the
third Horrific Terrible Temu. We call it team. It's Temu
Terrible Timu Christmas. And we have to try to out
terrible each other with the gifts because there are some
things on that website that are like unbelievably funny and
(19:27):
crazy ass like you've never seen anything like it. Yeah,
we go to the dark web of Temo.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
We do.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
We find things that are so horrific.
Speaker 2 (19:38):
So I got our earrings last year that were bloody
tail blonds, used condoms or something. It was so it
was so horrific.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Yeah, and then yeah, I got him. When did I
get you?
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
I got him fake cigarettes that you actually blow on.
They blow smoke. We have cigarettes you we had. Oh.
I got him a red mullet. I got him some
suret Oh. I got on a pair of pants. It
has my face right on his cross so open, you know. Anyway,
But I won. But I gave him.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Oh, I got him.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Cross with toes the stick out because he hates toes
and he hates crocs.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Disgusting.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Oh wait, no, I already already answered.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Sorry, what is the most humbling experience you've had. Oh
my god, are you getting all the deep ones? Dude,
I would have to say, taking care of my mom, yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Humble has in like it humbled you to see how
fragile life is.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
Yeah, and to not you know, because I'm kind of like,
let's go like I you know, I don't like waiting around.
I don't like being in trapping that kind of stuff.
So like when you're when somebody is super slow and you're.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
Having to patience. Yeah, that's a good answer, her, Claire.
You got a lot of really beautiful feedback from.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
I know, people were loving.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
They really thank you.
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Uh what are you afraid of passing down to your kids?
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Sounds easy? The mental illness Wait a minute, whoa, the anxiety,
all things bad brain, the bad never stops running brain,
bad brain.
Speaker 4 (21:31):
The bad My four children didn't ask for the bad brain?
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Did you get passed down?
Speaker 4 (21:37):
The bad brains on my mom's side is a little strange,
and it's because we all have a little bit of
the bad brain.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Oh that is funny, God, I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:51):
What are you currently addicted to? Well, that's easy. No,
come on, we have food food in the kitchen yet tonight?
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Oh door dash I can't I.
Speaker 1 (22:05):
Even my dog food. I hate the grocery store so much.
I door dashed my groceries I did. I don't even
get groceries half the time. I cannot set foot in
a grocery store anymore. Like I don't know if it's
like it's almost like a form of agoraphobia. I can't
set foot in a grocery store. It's too overwhelming for me.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
Grocery stores are really deeply it's.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
Too money choices. I'm glad you get me, Claire.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
This just gave me a brilliant idea. We're gonna play
a game where the loser has to go grocery shopping.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
That'll be the team in the wait? Is that? Is
that the what's the bet? Because the bet we always
have to have a bet. It has to go walk
around and go shop. But you like to shop, but
I can't.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
I don't like grocery shopping.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
All right, Whoever loses has to put on whatever you get,
hold whatever you get, go at what nine o'clock at night,
up to pavilions up here and go buy one thing.
And you're being I'm gonna film it.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
No, I'm gonna film it. No, you're gonna get it.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
You're gonna get it? Is it?
Speaker 2 (23:31):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Oh yeah, oh my god, oh god, oh dude, this
is like all what is.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
The last did you just pick these up for me?
Speaker 1 (23:46):
He did?
Speaker 2 (23:47):
What is the last time you cried? And why last Monday?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
I know because he read his moms ge eulogy for
the first time.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Can I get a nice know?
Speaker 1 (24:00):
We'll see Claire.
Speaker 4 (24:02):
When asked how are you? How often do you answer truthfully?
I always say I'm good, doesn't matter how I'm doing.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
So most of the time you're lying No. Often I'm
doing good, okay.
Speaker 4 (24:14):
But even if I'm not doing good, I just say
I'm being good.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
You know what? Sometimes I say I'm not great. I
wish I did that. But but then that is that
spurs on a conversation, Yeah, don't want to talk about it.
Speaker 4 (24:26):
And then also like it feels like an automatic conversation.
I'm not even thinking about how I'm doing. The conversation
just goes.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
How are you good? How are you good?
Speaker 4 (24:32):
And then we move on.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Yeah, I know that the hall and we have long
halways are guilty. So if you see somebody thrown down
and you're going this way, you have to like, look
at them, look at them, look at them. Hi, Hi,
how are you doing fine? How are you doing fine?
How you're doing anything? Cross? It's like the longest hallway times.
Speaker 4 (24:50):
I just look make out contact and do one of these.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
Yeah, I know, are like, hey, why are I doing that?
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (24:58):
Whatever? Okay? Oh my god, well this is easy. If
you could bring someone back, who would it be? Why then?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Oh, yeah, your dad.
Speaker 1 (25:07):
It would be my daddy, because he died when he
was just sixty years old, and that was just too soon.
He'd probably really be grumpy at this age because he
was a stress case anyway, just about. He always was
worried about us, and he was ahead of his time.
Like back in the day, Remember we never wore seat belts.
We would like sit up at the back of the
(25:28):
you know, the back of the car window, and do
all sorts of crazy things. My dad always made us
wear seat belts, and he always made us flass. That
was before his time. It was before his time anyway.
My dad was the funniest man that ever lived in
the most dry, witty way.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
I would have gotten along with him so well.
Speaker 1 (25:50):
Oh my god. He would make people laugh so hard,
like and not like Dad joke, laugh, just like he'd
make you. He is the one that made me so
okay with being laughing at myself, not taking myself too seriously,
because he would roast us so hard.
Speaker 2 (26:11):
It was so funny.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Roast my mom was so funny.
Speaker 2 (26:15):
Okay, uh, Eric, what have you done that you're proud of? Oh?
While I went to college, I've DoD the podcast. I
have a good job.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
Well you're you're high falutin tutin. You're sure proud of yourself.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Aren't you.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
I got up this morning, I had a good.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Breakfast, I had am I.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Had like five of them as usual. Oh my god, Well,
those are things to be proud of. Yes, and last Thursday.
I'm very proud of you from last Thursday.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Oh, thank you?
Speaker 1 (26:55):
Okay, Claire hi uh.
Speaker 4 (26:57):
Describe a memory that feels like a movie.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Oo, oh my goodness.
Speaker 2 (27:05):
What kind of a movie that's good?
Speaker 4 (27:07):
That truly could be anything depends what movie is. Oh,
this is a cute story. When I was in the
eighth grade, my the boy that I had a crush
on throughout all of middle school, confessed that he had
a crush on me too, that we were in like
with each other in Paris, with a poem.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
Really in eighth grade, he wrote you a poem?
Speaker 4 (27:33):
No, we were physically in Paris.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Oh wait, what were in Paris?
Speaker 4 (27:37):
WHOA presented me with a poem?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
That is a movie that I would never watch because
I'm not that kind. But that's sweet. I don't like
rom comms, hate some, although I did like Serendipity that one,
but and I liked say anything that was before Wait,
(28:01):
before your time? What conspiracy theory do you wait? Did
I just go? You went? What conspiracy theory?
Speaker 2 (28:07):
Do you believe in UFOs?
Speaker 1 (28:09):
Full on UFOs? They're here, we have biologics, we have bodies,
we have crashed crafts. They're in the freaking ocean, they're
in the sky. They have we have reverse technology. And
let me tell you something, Oh my God, tell you something.
Speaker 5 (28:25):
You know.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
What's terrifying, Claire. What's terrifying is China can also have
these things that we supposedly have. No if they learn
how to reverse uh jet propulsion, if they knew, if
they learn how these crafts work before we do, we're screw.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Oh no, what's that going to do for us? Ordering
from Temu?
Speaker 1 (28:48):
I know we might not be able to This.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Might be our last Hurrah, the gifts count.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
Okay, one more round then we'll call it a night.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
Is there closure that you never got to have?
Speaker 4 (29:03):
That's just crazy?
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Is this? But you had a quote? Did you have quote?
You have closure? But okay, is there anybody else you
never had closure with? Any of that? Well, you kind
of had closure with your brother, your closure with your
brother in a sense. Yeah, but not the way you
want it?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
No, But I mean no, not that I can think of.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
Okay, yeah, Claire, Yeah, Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
If there's something you've been wanting to let out, let
it out?
Speaker 1 (29:42):
Is there something that's really hoping?
Speaker 4 (29:44):
I could summon the burp in that moment, but that
would have been amazing.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
Oh, you can't make yourself burbal on command.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
I could probably summon up something.
Speaker 4 (29:52):
I don't know if we're gonna make audio poison by
asking that question.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
But no, I can't do it. I can't. I can't
fart on command. I can't, Oh, bourb on man.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
I could. I could sum up something for you.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
No, do not. Cautures are not pleasant.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
No, No, oh come on?
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Is there something like you want? It doesn't have to
be like negative?
Speaker 4 (30:16):
Oh yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
We're all.
Speaker 4 (30:20):
I'm happy to be here.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Well, you know what, let it out. That's what I've
been wanting to let it out. Watchless. Okay, I put
myself on the couch. Hey wait, hey, high Claire, I'm
fully up to the couch.
Speaker 4 (30:37):
I'm fully and then if somebody displaces me right.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Yes, yes, oh my god, you fit exactly. Wait no,
go back, come back, my new cows. Now we're cooking. Yes,
that's what I've been.
Speaker 4 (30:52):
Dying to do the whole show.
Speaker 1 (30:55):
Oh my god, you're brad. Don't make her do that.
Don't make her do that.
Speaker 4 (31:06):
I'm sexually harassing my coworker.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
I know you are. I'm gonna San Antonio, don't. I'm booking.
I'm booking tonight.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
She's gonna personalized parking spot. What you're talking about?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
What do you owe yourself?
Speaker 2 (31:23):
Grace?
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Absolutely? I owe myself. I just need to give myself
a little bit of a break because I'm hard on myself.
I'm really really, really really really hard on myself. You are,
But then again, I ordered door Dash every night.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
So that kind of cancels each other out right.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I mean, so I'm good to my I'm good to myself.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
That's different.
Speaker 1 (31:47):
I'm hard on myself professionally and emotionally, emotionally and and
I'm also hard on myself. Like when I look in
the mirror, I'm hard on myself. When I see things,
I pick out the negative things, and that's I don't
I owe myself more kindness.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I guess why would you look in the mirror and
be hard on yourself?
Speaker 1 (32:11):
Because there's there's there's Sorry, you may not see them,
but there are flaws. There are flaws. Oh, there are flaws.
Have lipstick on my teeth right now, for sure.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
I I can't imagine. I have the heater nose, but
your nose fits so perfectly with your face.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
I would never change my nose. Don't get no, I'm
not doing that. I have my dad's nose, and my
dad's nose I'm going to keep. I don't know, just
stuff like I just feel like, oh my god, look
at these wrinkles or this thing.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
I when I say that, I look like I sleep
hanging upside down like a bat. I'm not kidding. Sometimes.
I know there have been time times that I've gone
to work and I'm like, oh, I wake up in
the morning, I look at myself. I'm dressed up, and
I'm like, you know, you don't what happened. And I'll
be at work and somebody will pop into my office
(33:09):
and they'll be all rough night, and I.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Know, I hate that.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
I was like I thought I looked today, but apparently not.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
You look tired, That's the one I get.
Speaker 4 (33:20):
Sometimes you look.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
Like like nine hours of the plus and I haven't
find I'm not tired. I'm fully awake, Like do we
have a problem, buddy, Like what the hell? Yeah? Okay,
do you want to do one more round? And then
we'll call it a great okay, Claire?
Speaker 4 (33:39):
Yeah, if you could remind everyone of just one thing,
what would it be. We all got to be trying
new things all the time, and I feel like people
forget that that's good.
Speaker 1 (33:55):
That's really good. Not only does that keep your brain strong,
but like I can attest to that because I mean,
you're younger, because and you're like more spongy than we are,
or like more dryed sponges rain elasticity. Yeah, you're like
you're like a nice fresh sponge that comes out of
(34:15):
the package. It's still a little wet, you know.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
It's like my sponge is so dry you could dunk
at the ocean and it wouldn't even absorb people.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
I've learned that at this age, I can still learn
like complicated things, and I feel good about that. So, yes,
that's a great answer.
Speaker 2 (34:30):
That's a really good answer.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
What do you wish people knew about you that I would?
If I had the money, I would give money to
everybody in the world. I swear to God. I would
spoil everyone. I would. I would. I would do the
(34:56):
thing that Jesse did in Breaking Bad, where he had
the hundreds and he just went through neighborhoods and just
like I'd pay for people's Christmases, just like Tommy does
with breaking an entery, and help families I'm going to
I'd help people pay for, like, you know, funerals that
they couldn't help pay for, I'd help. I'd help all
(35:20):
the charities that needs to help. Volunteering. I don't know.
I probably would help them monetarily. I'd help them, you
know what, I find all the money in the world,
I probably would help. I would volunteer too. I need
to do something with my time.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
So it's good to know, because if this happens when
you and I are sharing a bed, I'm.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Going to share my money too.
Speaker 2 (35:40):
Yeah, you'll be paid for your own hair extensions.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
Oh no, no, no, that was an edict. You made
that promise to me.
Speaker 2 (35:51):
That deal is null and boyd if you wind up
becoming Bobo Rockefeller.
Speaker 1 (35:56):
Yes, no, wait did we We are not being Oh
okay Lobo Rockefeller.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Jesus, I want a different one.
Speaker 1 (36:08):
Okay, okay, you can all right, let's not get so awful.
I described the lowest moment in your life. We did
there already. We just didn't. We just did that. Okay.
Speaker 2 (36:19):
What what was the happiest point in your life? Car
go boom boom meeting you?
Speaker 1 (36:27):
Okay, thank you. That's very sweet, but untrue. What's the
happiest moment of your life?
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Meeting Claire.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
Like a month and a half. Yeah, that was the
happiest moment of his life. His entire life had.
Speaker 4 (36:42):
All been leading up to that moment.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
No. Probably the happiest moment of my life would be
when I was in junior high and I was teased
terribly in school and somebody was tea see me, and
this group of girls came and told the dude off.
(37:05):
And then we've been friends ever since. And that includes
Marlon there and Marla, theres Tina.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
They all came to rescue. And now you guys are
I love that story?
Speaker 2 (37:16):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Mm hmm is it your turn? That's cute. I thought
we said one more round? Did he start?
Speaker 2 (37:24):
No, you started with Claire. I started, so you you
just skipped me.
Speaker 4 (37:28):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Yeah, you just skipped me. That's all. So now we're good.
Now we're done.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
Okay, okay, great? Great? What was I going to say? No,
I had something profound to say. You did, Yeah, I
don't know. But anyway, how fun a December nights. Good
luck with park well you're not parking at uber and
good luck with the sa at a low tape.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
I will I'm gonna go see her.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
And uh, Claire, you have a great weekend yourself, get
some rest. You're probably working like me. All right, I'll
see there, and uh you guys, thank you so much
for watching and listening. We sure appreciate. We don't ever
take it for granted. Love your podcast. This is where
see Claire, Claire, Claire, see where this I set it up.
(38:17):
I have I put the gift there the podcast. There
we go, it just needed the bow on top. Thank yeah,
love you mis babies
Speaker 2 (38:24):
By Love you guys,
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