May 29, 2025 • 31 mins
In this episode, Laura sports a new Target shirt that the boys hilariously criticize as horrible. What do YOU think of it? Meanwhile, Laura grapples with a dilemma involving a man she met at Viejas. The conversation shifts to her Hinge experience, showcasing her shockingly outdated perspective on dating. Lots of laughs, primarily at Laura's expense, making for an entertaining listen that promises to brighten your day!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Oh hello, Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark. I'm Laura Kane.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Eric Grimmer.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
I just needed to finish his commenting on Facebook, So
there you go.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Eric Rimmer, fantastic co host of Freaking. It'll be six
years in August.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Six years.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Oh my god, Oh my god. Anyway, thanks so much.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
For you're such a You're such a good partner.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
In your ears. I know you are. You said something
so nice. What did you say to me? Was it
on text? Because you didn't give you.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
A birthday card? My birthday card was my all my
people calling in.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Well I didn't see you over your birthday, I.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Know, but you said you sent something nice. You said
something really nice in a text, and I was really touched.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
I did.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I said you were my soulmate, my partner, my work
wife and everything in between. Well something like that.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
It was something super happy. So when you feel better,
is that when I get my gifts?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Yes, well I ordered it.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
You ordered it after No, I ordered it honestly.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
No, No, you can be honest. I don't even care.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
No I did. It's from Temu. She'll take like six
months to get here.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
No, No, it's actually not from.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
It's not, Well, how do you do.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
You're the only she's the only person I buy gifts
for off of that site.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Well that's for Christmas.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
Yeah, that's yeah, you should. That's slightly insulting.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Well, hey, there's a lot of things in the cells
from that website, and some work and some don't, and
so it's a it's kind of a crap shoot, but
I'm willing to take it when it's that cheap. Okay,
So I need to tell you about something I'm dealing
with right now, and tell me the proper way to
handle this situation that I'm in that I got myself into.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
You know me and I like people. I like to
talk to people.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
I'm a curious person and I like I like getting
to know people. And this is not me flirting. This
is just me how I am. Like, I want to know,
like what makes you tick, where you come from?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Like here we put a pin in that for just
a second. Sure, can we can we just talk about
something really quick?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
I would like to know what's going on here. It's
a top that is the most hideous. Where did that
come from?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Target?
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
God? What you're going to start boycotting them.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Wow, that is that looks like one of those those
aprons that you get for somebody that's got like the.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Big buff body on it or the big boobs and
that that it's bad in.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
The nothing that is just what if I wore like
a jacket.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Open, No, it would know, nothing would make that cute.
I think a Christmas sweater would be better.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Yeah, it's that bad.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
Please pretty bad. It's really tacky awful. It's kind of
an isore.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Actually it really Yeah, I'm gonna say burn it. Don't
even try and sell it at the swap mets.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Okay, let me ask you now, try not to joke.
I want you to be completely honest about this completely,
Can I ask you without the ugliness that you think
it's so ugly? But I was this close to wearing this.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Outfit to work. Oh God, tell me what would have happened?
Speaker 4 (03:36):
You probably would have got fired.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Why it's not suggested for a bad taste. Yeah, but
it's not showing any sleeving, no its.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
That you have, you like, as a person, have no
judgment or taste, and.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Your taste is all in your bland food that you eat. Yeah,
that is I'm starting to sweat hearing to ask this question,
how much did you pay for it?
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
I don't know. It was on the sale rack.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
I don't care if that was.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
That should have been like a nickel ben and that
would have been too much.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I thought it was.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
It should have given that away and I liked it.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
It should be given to a landfill. Awful.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
What do you guys think about this? In the comments?
Wherever you're listening, If you're well, you're listening, you don't
know what it looks like. You're gonna have to jump
onto YouTube and look at it.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
What do you think? Is it cute? Is it interesting?
Is it like sexy?
Speaker 4 (04:34):
No?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Could I wear this to work? No?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
It's stinky.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
This would not offend anybody at work.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Yeah, all right, let's continue story.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Okay, when I was at v Ahaus on my birthday, huh,
and Antonio and his family were enjoying the Cheap Trick
Show and I was out walking around doing my own thing.
Speaker 5 (05:00):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
There's a game that I really like called hot Pots.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
It's hot. It's the flaving hot pot game, and you
always hit it a slot.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah, it's it's a penny slot, but you always hit
the bonus and the bonus Last Forever and like that's
it's just really it's a fun game to play.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I don't know if I even want anything.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
So I'm I'm sitting there playing this man I want
to say maybe seventy five sat next to me, thin
man and from another country, I'm not sure. He had
an accent, and we started talking because he was playing
the game too, and then he was asking me all
these questions, you know, and I'm just playing.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I'm like, yeah, you know, not being really nice. I'm
happy it's my birthday, you know. And he's so we
you know. I'm like, what do you do? And he's like, oh,
I sell jeeps. I'm like, oh my god, I have
a jeep. No way, that's so cool, la la la.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
And so I said, you should listen to or watch
our podcast. That's what we do, me and my partner
and here. So we do a podcast and it's really
fun to watch, so maybe you know. And I had
my cards with me, so I gave him my card
and he said to me, he goes, oh, so you
work there. I go, well, no, I also work at
(06:15):
iHeartMedia and I do. I work in the newsroom and
I work at you know. I was just telling we're
just making chit chat, right, huh. So then it's time
to go because it's the college is over. Antonio is
getting annoyed. It's time to leave. He's like, we're out,
(06:35):
We're out at the valet. I'm like, all right, I'll
meet you right there. Let me gather my stuff. So
the guy walks me out to the valet, which no
big deal. Thought I was a gentlemanly thing for him
to do because I was all by myself at that point.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
I Anyway, I didn't realize that on my card is
my personal cell phone number.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
Oh oh, has he been texting you?
Speaker 2 (06:57):
He's been calling me NonStop.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
I've been I don't recognize the number because I always
think it's spam. But he he sent me a text
with a picture of a bouquet of flowers in the
seat of his car. For the last three days, he's
been driving to iHeart to drop off flowers for me.
(07:19):
But it's it was closed Sunday, it was closed Monday,
and then today my boss texts me and says, oh,
you have flowers at the front desk.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
I just thought you'd want to know. I was like, oh, no,
he cave. I'm in there. I haven't texted a back to.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Say I will picture of the flowers.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Now, yeah, well he's like I've been.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
I've been trying to drop these off and nobody's nobody's there.
I think I did text it back and said, you
know what, we're closed on Sundays and it was a holiday.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
But then I started getting a little weirded out.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
Have you picked up the phone once to him?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
No, Jesus, Well.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
No, I mean no, I'm I don't pick up the
phone and Eric calls it's business cards.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
That's well, I didn't think about it. I didn't think
about all the information. But it was kind of guy.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
She doesn't pick up the phone when I'm the worst
text on the planet.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
So yeah, he won't text, and I don't like to talk.
He doesn't like to text.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
I don't like to talk.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I hate texting.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Yet we somehow communicate, I know we do.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
So anyway, there are flowers currently waiting for me there.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
And those cars don't have your address, do they?
Speaker 1 (08:31):
No, they just have our you know, our website and
my phone number and.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
What's his name?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Well on the call, it's different than the card he
gave me.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
The card he gave you.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
Where it's this jeep dealership. Wherever this jeep dealership was,
I wasn't sure where, I don't remember. But on his
card his name is Sean. But when the phone rang,
it was like a bell or.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Something like that.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
That doesn't well, that could be a number of reasons. Wait,
how old do you think this guy was?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
In his seventies? Oh?
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Okay, I say, correct for you.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
This is another thing we need to talk about.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Seventy dear lord.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
No, not that I have, you know, I just I wasn't.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
It's only a ten year difference.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
I didn't make any kind of any kind of jestive comments.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
That doesn't mean anything.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Well, then maybe he obviously he's trying to like.
Speaker 4 (09:33):
Okay, let me assume me. Let me explain the modern
dating landscape to you.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Well, this guy isn't very modern, is he?
Speaker 5 (09:40):
No?
Speaker 4 (09:41):
Okay? If you how long were you guys talking for?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I'd say like forty five minutes? Maybe?
Speaker 4 (09:46):
Okay? Wow, did you ever leave? An impression? Typically a
prolonged conversa are you wearing that top? Typically a prolonged
conversation where a woman is showing interest in the guy's
like actual life, typically in like employ interests.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
We were sitting nicer. Playing in the game.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
Let me know typically implies interest. Now, no, no, no, he
has been a creep. That has nothing to do with
the fact. But that's why he is maybe taking yeah thinking.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
He hasn't said anything suggestive, He hasn't done anything suggested.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Or trying to woo you.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
It's a little did you talk a lot with your
tongue when you were like You're like he no, okay.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So anyway, that is currently the situation.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Your roommates know that their lives are all now in
danger because you have a stalker.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
He doesn't know where you live.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
He'll find out. I think I could actually from your
phone number, probably find out where you live.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I'm sure you could.
Speaker 4 (10:43):
He might be able to too.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Why do you think I have a man living with me?
It's because it keeps I feel safer in this.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Does he know he needs to protect you? Now you
have a stalker?
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Antonio?
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Hey, you know, I know a huge deterrent just to
open the door.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
He was he he you you did, but the don't.
It was too late by that time, because he had
walked me out to the valet. I couldn't find Antonio.
He wasn't order to be seen, and then I'm like
calling him furiously and this guy is sitting standing next
to me. I want to go, I warned her.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
I think a huge return would be dead. Any kind
of a stock would be to open the door wearing
that top.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
Do not hand out your.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Business card everybody. Right now, I'm going to beat up.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
I'm going to beat up to you.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
You with the Taylor swist stuff. I want to beat
you up. I want to beat up Antonio and I
want to beat up.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
I don't want to really beat up you. Speak your butt.
Maybe a little bit of spanking, is that okay?
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Yeah, even though it's not Saturday night, that's okay, Okay.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
I remember this guy.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I didn't realize it was in my card.
Speaker 4 (11:50):
Well, they didn't write it down cards just to get
someone to listen to the podcast. It's not worth it.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Well, hey, that's how you get you.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
Know, that's not how you not by passing out business card.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I can't individual, I can't, I can't, Okay.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
So when Marien and I decided to go on the
dating app together, we made this promise to each other,
and so I just been.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
Like, I haven't been one of you has found success?
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Yes, and me I when I think about it, which
isn't very often because I don't really have time, I
look and I'll go I didn't pay for it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
So you can only look at like one at a time.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
And if you don't have a hinge, if you don't
like the guy or whatever it is that he likes,
if he liked you and you don't like him back,
you can push you know, the X, and you can
look at the next one.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
You can't look at all the people that liked you
at once.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
So for some reason, and Brian, I'm sure you're gonna
have a comment about this.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
I'm sure Eric you're gonna have a comment about this.
But every thirty four year old man in the world
is into me, and it's it's a kink. I'm a kink.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
Necessarily your age is on there right, Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
In fact, they have that grain any complex.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Okay, So here's one dude.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Men also are their standards can be if they're desperate,
their standards are real low. So they well, they may
think you're just easy because you're older. They're like, oh, perfect,
there she'll be desperate like a cougar's like a young guy.
She'll be she'll think she's lucky.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Oh I could see that break.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Okay the graduate I recorded, Okay, this is my message. Okay,
this is a dude that messaged me voice messaged me. Okay,
my room Marie goes, you got a voice message him back?
So I did awkwardly. It's horrible. And then he messaged
me back, and we're going to play that.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
Are you going to play his first and then yours?
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Yes, and then I'm going to play some of the
other ones.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Some guys on their profile include a little like a
little voice message like I'm really into and then they'll
talk or please don't do and then they'll talk or
you know, I'll play some of those two.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
But I got them all together. Here we go.
Speaker 4 (13:59):
Oh no, it's a message.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Stand how to weave it? Any things for the voice
of face right, make things a littly easier. I'm just
leaving the beach. I just went quickly, just a good
jump in the ocean and relax for a little bit.
Speaker 7 (14:15):
What about you?
Speaker 6 (14:15):
How's your Sunday Funday? Going do anything special? Keeping it mellow?
Or did you get yourself into anything fun this weekend?
And I have to say, pretty eyes, I'm very attractive
and it seems like some fun you get to know. Well,
hope you're having a great guard and looking forward to
finding out more.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Okay, that was nice.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Here I go all listen anyway, just getting back to you. Yes,
it was a crazy weekend, and then I had to
work yesterday Memorial Day, like all day long today, and yeah,
now I have to get up and go to work again,
just you know, like the normal human being goes to work.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Anyway.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I think you're really cute. Yes, I'm old af but
uh I we have fun together. And yes I am trouble.
I'm a lot of trouble. So he had said that
that's uh it's good and bad.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Okay, this is a response. This is a response.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
You're funny.
Speaker 7 (15:12):
I like it.
Speaker 6 (15:13):
So the question is how much trouble and how much
fun you might and maybe we could text and talk
off this make things a little easier, and I might
love trouble and then uh I look forward to finding
out more. And you you might be able to be
look hot as fuck. So if you're good kisser and
(15:34):
have nice legs too, I guess I'll have to find
out and you'll have to enlighten me. Maybe we could
text and talk off this and make things easier.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
I said, okay, wait wait here, wait wait, let me push.
When we push, I said, well, oh god, all.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
Right, he's a little cringey. But I think you were
actually worse.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Oh I know, I know you were.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
If you If I received that, I was blocked so
dry dry, Yeah, you were so dry.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
It's about work and stuff.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
He was like, you know, he said you actually his
first mention was really nice. If it was very nice,
and you just like, yeah, at work, so that's fun. Yeah,
I guess yeah. And then you're just like you're like
so dry, like all right sea, like I feel like
you were not putting any effort.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
Him.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Well, then he goes, well, if you have, if you
have like like like that, I said, I said, I
wrote him.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
I wrote him back.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
I said, I have a thirty four inches seam.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Oh god, he doesn't know.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
That on my head on two legs. No body. Oh
I didn't give him that.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
The legs were like those comments were creepy. When he said,
he's like, oh, I like a little not whatever. He said.
That was bad.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
So here's a.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Guy on can I can I record a message for
you and be like a house that would drive a Yeah.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Like this is her husband. She's a she's I need
someone to keep her busy. I approve of this.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
This is a dude.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
This is on his profile. Oh god, And this is
guy's one that sent me a rose or liked me
or whatever.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Here we go. Oh wait, but the question is it's like,
all I ask is that you.
Speaker 7 (17:17):
All I ask is that you call me Colin because
Colin is my name. My name is not Colon. My
whole life, I've been called Colon. So I'm damaged by that.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
I thought that was kind of huge.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
I've heard that before. I feel like I know who
the heck his name is Colon, Colan's not real name.
Who is mister? Okay, there's one who mistakes Calin for Colan.
I feel like that's.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You wouldn't know that's famous? All right? So this one
this one?
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Okay, wait, oh my god. Wait, guess the song here
we go. This was on this dude's profile.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Guess the song.
Speaker 5 (18:00):
Ready the King and his man soul, the Queen from
her bed and bound her and her boom, the seas
be ours and by the powers where we will?
Speaker 4 (18:23):
Are you kidding me? Which lever? Do you know what
that's from?
Speaker 7 (18:29):
No?
Speaker 5 (18:30):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (18:30):
You guys, don't you look excited from parts of.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
The Caribbean movie. Oh god, you're a little No. I
think it's so. That is like the that's insane thing
I've ever heard of everard this is his profile. It's
a shanty at best. I don't think it exists beyond.
I don't know if that's like an actual one or
just made for that movie.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
What what was he thinking?
Speaker 4 (18:52):
I don't know. That's crazy, okay.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
And finally this one is.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I was but like I was hearing that, I was like,
there's no way, like this sounds familiar, but there's no
way he's singing this song because it's it's not like
a real song at best, a sea shanty. Oh my god,
that's so weird.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
I know it's weird. And then this one is I'm
convinced that I'm convinced that.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
I'm convinced that the n Cuba men's basketball is fixed.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Oh okay, great boy, here's another one. Oh no, is
that the same one?
Speaker 5 (19:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
That's it. That's all I have. I mean, this is
what I'm dealing with.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
That that's crazy, you know what?
Speaker 3 (19:32):
I what I would suggest becoming a nun No, actually.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
That's I want to go through a slut stage.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Remember, well, then put some effort into it. Well, I
don't have time, Liar, liar, you have time. If you
want to do it, maybe you can be sludy with
this first guy. No, actually I think the guy, the
first guy, I mean, yeah, sure, if you want to,
that's fine.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
He was fight I may have like burned that bridge.
Why because I was so cringey. No, he seems if
I can dial it up a little bit.
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Yeah, I think that's eligible. I actually think the guy
who said the NCAA was fixed, he's probably pretty chill.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
You probably tell him, They tell him that that the
nickname for your mouth is Hoover.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
You should the guy who sang the song, you should
ask him why he chose that song, because it's insane.
That is insane.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
All right, now you're gonna help me. Okay, this is
what we're going to do. Right now, We're going to
write a note to the first guy who's twenty years
younger than me.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
Well, if this is a slut phase, and who cares?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
I know?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Truly, So here we go. Okay, his name, where is he?
Where is he? Where is he? In your return? I'm
not I'm going to protect this dude. Where did you go?
Speaker 5 (20:38):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (20:38):
Where did you go? His name is there? He is, Okay,
So after my should I leave a voice message or
just text him?
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Which I think because he said he said, let's text
and get off this, so I think.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
The okay, give me all right, give me, give me
some game, give me some game.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Actually, the next step would you actually just be to
just text hi your phone number or just message him
your phone number.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
But that's that's also dry, just like lay it out there.
Speaker 4 (21:05):
That's the prize. That's not dry.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
No text, no words, no nothing, just my hey.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Because we had a great day, here's my phone number.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Brian says no.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Oh, Marie says no either, and they're young.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
No, just drop This guy is yeah, because his message
said he said, hey, I'd love to get your phone
number connected off the app. That's that's like he's that's
the hook, and so you have to either respond to that.
If you ignore that, that's weird. So either just say hey,
let's keep chatting here and that kills it, or you
drop your phone number, say hey, cutie, Patuti, here's my
phone number.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Wait, Maria, okay, Personally, I'll like going on a furs
day before the phone number.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
What that's crazy?
Speaker 2 (21:45):
Wait wait no, that's c Wait so you have to
make the date on the app?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Yeah that's weird.
Speaker 5 (21:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Oh she likes to get it. She likes to get
it like going like she doesn't like to mess around
on the app too much. She doesn't like it.
Speaker 4 (22:02):
No, that's fine, that's why. But you get to get
the phone number, you text, you step the first date.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
So no other words but my but the digits.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
I would I would say, that's what I would suggest.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Okay, here we go.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
Never text the stupid Hey, how is your day going?
Speaker 2 (22:18):
I won't I'm not already did that scuffle?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
I know it is terrible. Okay, so this will This
will give me a little bit more street cred. Right,
just dropping my phone number with.
Speaker 4 (22:28):
No because that's like it's like a mic drop is
like boom, Okay, here we go. Ready, he got it.
It's gonna make him more interested. You can make him
way more since boom, there you go.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Okay, now psychology, Now she'll get a dick picked back.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
No, well maybe actually probably not that he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Well he might on in your experience, have you received
any of those through this app? From the app from
duce unsolicited unsolicited you can send up pictures no, I know,
but when you've gotten off the app with somebody from
this site, unsolicito.
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Pone number, just like like I don't give my phone number.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Have you have you solicited one?
Speaker 4 (23:07):
Okay, No, she's saying no, no comment, no comment, she
said anyone.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
No, No she's not. She doesn't. She doesn't do that
kind of thing anyway.
Speaker 4 (23:19):
All right, so the guy who Now, I think you
actually should message back to the guy who sang you
a song. But you need to fit because we need
to hear, We need to.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Learn to see what this guy looks like, because no,
I don't remember.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
I think he probably looks like Johnny Depp.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
No text him. That's a nice song. What's it called?
Speaker 6 (23:34):
No?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Okay, do you like this guy? Because he has a restaurant? Nob?
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Do I like him?
Speaker 2 (23:39):
And he's he's like forty eight?
Speaker 4 (23:41):
That's did he leave a voice message?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Does know?
Speaker 1 (23:45):
But here's this, this is here's his profile. Unusual skills.
I can do the splits and cook like Boordaine. Okay,
he's straight, he's six feet, he has he's lying, he's
so he's eleven. Oh I know, totally Uh he's a
restaurant owner. Uh, he's into monogamy. He's got a lot
(24:07):
of tattoos. Never say no in life because it's short.
Try everything once, maybe twice. Say thank you to people
that treat you well. Be relentlessly spontaneous, laugh a lot.
He has a dog that he's kissing in one picture.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
Monogamous, yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
A random fact I love is water is wet, women
have secrets.
Speaker 4 (24:25):
Okay, that last part is kind of cringe, but honestly,
the rest of that's fine.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
And then here is him painting something in him at
I don't know, a rave like he looks like he's
at a rodeo. Yeah, he looks like he looks like
he said, so Fie stadium.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
He sounds kind of chrull.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Okay, so do I like? Okay?
Speaker 4 (24:46):
So what do I.
Speaker 6 (24:48):
Do?
Speaker 5 (24:48):
You like him?
Speaker 4 (24:49):
I mean, how do you do that?
Speaker 5 (24:50):
Here?
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (24:51):
I already chatted with him. Here's here's Oh no. His
opening remark was actually pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
It was there you are? That was nice, and I
went hello, because stunning, that's all. And then I said,
where's your restaurant.
Speaker 4 (25:14):
Here? Oh my god, oh my god, and didn't continue
from there.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
And then he said ocean beach.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
If we were on the other side of this and
we were like we were judging, these are the messages
we were judging, I would be roasting you, right, Oh
my god. Actually I'm gonna coach you regardless.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Why I have no practice? Out of practice?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
You said you love talking with people.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Why are you so bad because I'm vulnerable.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
I'm feeling vulnerable.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
This isn't vulnerable.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
It is because they're meeting.
Speaker 4 (25:40):
It's kind of That's like, this is the most surface
level conversation ever. This is the easy part.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Well, it's the hard part.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
But you should be good at this.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
Par for the compliment, I'm going to break that.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Yes you do. Wait how long ago did you send
the first text?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Like a long time? Oh no, I thank you for
the compliment.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
You're double texting like hours later? Oh my god.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
All right, okay, let me get let me give you one.
Speaker 4 (26:04):
Yeah, that's good. If you're gonna double text him after days,
you got to put in some serious effort here.
Speaker 7 (26:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
I'm liking. I'm liking, but I see No, that's creepy.
I'm liking the tattoos.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
No, love your tattoos.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Ink, love your ink.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
Yeah, that might be too young for love.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
The word love is too fine. Love in the ink
okay and the dog, Okay, loving the ink and the dog?
Speaker 3 (26:33):
All right, okay?
Speaker 4 (26:36):
So oh boy, this is like the most stressful part
of my day, serious, so painful.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
First the top, then this dude. I think you know,
I know this.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
I think something just happened to my colin, I mean
my colon.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
All right, to be continued. We will continue this, uh
wow next week and I'll let you know. Hey, did
we jump off?
Speaker 5 (27:00):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (27:00):
But please we jump off the page?
Speaker 4 (27:02):
The guys in each other's arms.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
I don't I don't want to know, because he's probably
going to sing some funeral.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
That's a beautiful song. What's it called?
Speaker 7 (27:13):
No?
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Why the hell did you pick a song from such
a shitty movie?
Speaker 4 (27:16):
Maybe it's noe hey the movie was not sure. Maybe
it's a genuine sea shanty. I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Maybe he dresses up like Johnny Depp.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
For wouldn't that be a great person to all talk
to at all? You're always looking for.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Podcast content, And honestly, the voice was.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
Can we listen to it again?
Speaker 5 (27:35):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Wow, it's so funny, left field, weird. But I'm gonna
wake up screaming.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
But I know I'm seeing. This is stressful.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I think you should text them back like, oh my god,
you have so many apps on your.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I do, oh my god, faulty. Wait let me I
got I group these altogether, so hold on, let me let.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Me get wait way too the apps at it? Hold on?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Where's the guy singing?
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Where's the guys?
Speaker 2 (28:06):
All I ask is that you here's the colond.
Speaker 4 (28:09):
Calling guy and then here we go.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Here's the song. Ready, guess the song.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
The King and his man had? And that would be
a demerit right there. Honestly, it's so bold and insane.
I'm almost kind of I cannot Actually his voice is fine.
(28:38):
It's just it's awful. Now it's not it's actually a
good song. Men's basketball is It's not the same guy.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
This is the different guy. Do you see double I
guy or no?
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Honestly, I give him a chance. He seems that's like
a normal thing to say.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
Kind of Yeah, it was a flirtation.
Speaker 4 (28:55):
It was just kind of like chance.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
All right, you guys.
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Holy crap, So you please message that I got back.
You have to message him back the singer. Yes, it's
so funny.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Picture.
Speaker 4 (29:08):
Yeah, I got We've got to know more about him,
because that's so crazy.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
All right, you know what, for you, Bryan, I'll find
out the story.
Speaker 4 (29:14):
Maybe he'll come on the show and sing to Brian,
I'd be crazy.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Would you like to be serenaded.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
From a pirate of the king if he dresses like
Oh god, I will literally be sec on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (29:29):
I see. I don't know what would it like. Why
someone would choose that song, probably.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
As Jack Sparrow impersonator.
Speaker 4 (29:36):
Dude, you have to date a Jack Sparrow. Persons so
much fun? Oh my god, what is wrong with the
two of you? I'd be so fun.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
You're all over the place.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
Oh me, okay, yeah, all right, sure, okay, well me
and my Yes, I had work. I went to work.
It was work. Yes, I can. I guess I can
be a little naughty. I guess.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
I didn't say naughty, I said trouble.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
There's two things that I never want to experience again.
This top and that song.
Speaker 4 (30:06):
It's actually it's actually a good song in the movie,
but it shouldn't be sung on hinge. You guys, I
have been traumatized.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
This amazing. Oh my god, you guys, calm down. This
I'm getting I'm getting I'm working on it.
Speaker 4 (30:23):
You're not. You're you're putting a minimal effort.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
You're helping me what I need to take charge. I'm
laying it out so you guys can help me out
take charge. All right, all right, we're helping your sister out.
I've got the power.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
I am a woman.
Speaker 5 (30:38):
I you know it.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Whatever, I got the power because I got the.
Speaker 4 (30:45):
Okay, yeah, that's a good way to make sure you
never see a guy again.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
Really, okay. I would never say that to anybody who
I will.
Speaker 4 (30:54):
Scare off any winger two mile radios.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
I hope you don't ever say on a day what
you just said.
Speaker 4 (31:02):
Thank God referred that as your that's awful by who
huh oh, but that's what you said.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
You said, Well, I didn't want to say the P
worda the P.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
Word, vagina, no glitterius.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Alright, we're done, we're done, We're down, We're done, right, everybody,
all right, love.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
Your podcast, Love your podcast, babies.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
I'm sorry, I love you so much. I'm trying to
find your new step dad. I love you.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
Oh god, oh no, that was bad. All right, all right,
all right,
Oh hello, Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark. I'm Laura Kane.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Eric Grimmer.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
I just needed to finish his commenting on Facebook, So
there you go.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Eric Rimmer, fantastic co host of Freaking. It'll be six
years in August.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
Six years.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Oh my god, Oh my god. Anyway, thanks so much.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
For you're such a You're such a good partner.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
In your ears. I know you are. You said something
so nice. What did you say to me? Was it
on text? Because you didn't give you.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
A birthday card? My birthday card was my all my
people calling in.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Well I didn't see you over your birthday, I.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Know, but you said you sent something nice. You said
something really nice in a text, and I was really touched.
Speaker 4 (00:52):
I did.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
I said you were my soulmate, my partner, my work
wife and everything in between. Well something like that.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
It was something super happy. So when you feel better,
is that when I get my gifts?
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Yes, well I ordered it.
Speaker 3 (01:09):
You ordered it after No, I ordered it honestly.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
No, No, you can be honest. I don't even care.
Speaker 4 (01:14):
No I did. It's from Temu. She'll take like six
months to get here.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
No, No, it's actually not from.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
It's not, Well, how do you do.
Speaker 3 (01:23):
You're the only she's the only person I buy gifts
for off of that site.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Well that's for Christmas.
Speaker 4 (01:29):
Yeah, that's yeah, you should. That's slightly insulting.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
Well, hey, there's a lot of things in the cells
from that website, and some work and some don't, and
so it's a it's kind of a crap shoot, but
I'm willing to take it when it's that cheap. Okay,
So I need to tell you about something I'm dealing
with right now, and tell me the proper way to
handle this situation that I'm in that I got myself into.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
You know me and I like people. I like to
talk to people.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
I'm a curious person and I like I like getting
to know people. And this is not me flirting. This
is just me how I am. Like, I want to know,
like what makes you tick, where you come from?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Like here we put a pin in that for just
a second. Sure, can we can we just talk about
something really quick?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Okay?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
I would like to know what's going on here. It's
a top that is the most hideous. Where did that
come from?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Target?
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (02:34):
God? What you're going to start boycotting them.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
Wow, that is that looks like one of those those
aprons that you get for somebody that's got like the.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Big buff body on it or the big boobs and
that that it's bad in.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
The nothing that is just what if I wore like
a jacket.
Speaker 4 (02:59):
Open, No, it would know, nothing would make that cute.
I think a Christmas sweater would be better.
Speaker 3 (03:05):
Yeah, it's that bad.
Speaker 4 (03:07):
Please pretty bad. It's really tacky awful. It's kind of
an isore.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Actually it really Yeah, I'm gonna say burn it. Don't
even try and sell it at the swap mets.
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Okay, let me ask you now, try not to joke.
I want you to be completely honest about this completely,
Can I ask you without the ugliness that you think
it's so ugly? But I was this close to wearing this.
Speaker 2 (03:31):
Outfit to work. Oh God, tell me what would have happened?
Speaker 4 (03:36):
You probably would have got fired.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
Why it's not suggested for a bad taste. Yeah, but
it's not showing any sleeving, no its.
Speaker 4 (03:45):
That you have, you like, as a person, have no
judgment or taste, and.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
Your taste is all in your bland food that you eat. Yeah,
that is I'm starting to sweat hearing to ask this question,
how much did you pay for it?
Speaker 5 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
I don't know. It was on the sale rack.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
I don't care if that was.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
That should have been like a nickel ben and that
would have been too much.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I thought it was.
Speaker 3 (04:13):
It should have given that away and I liked it.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
It should be given to a landfill. Awful.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
What do you guys think about this? In the comments?
Wherever you're listening, If you're well, you're listening, you don't
know what it looks like. You're gonna have to jump
onto YouTube and look at it.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
What do you think? Is it cute? Is it interesting?
Is it like sexy?
Speaker 4 (04:34):
No?
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Could I wear this to work? No?
Speaker 3 (04:38):
It's stinky.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
This would not offend anybody at work.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
Yeah, all right, let's continue story.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Okay, when I was at v Ahaus on my birthday, huh,
and Antonio and his family were enjoying the Cheap Trick
Show and I was out walking around doing my own thing.
Speaker 5 (05:00):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
There's a game that I really like called hot Pots.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
It's hot. It's the flaving hot pot game, and you
always hit it a slot.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Yeah, it's it's a penny slot, but you always hit
the bonus and the bonus Last Forever and like that's
it's just really it's a fun game to play.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
I don't know if I even want anything.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
So I'm I'm sitting there playing this man I want
to say maybe seventy five sat next to me, thin
man and from another country, I'm not sure. He had
an accent, and we started talking because he was playing
the game too, and then he was asking me all
these questions, you know, and I'm just playing.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
I'm like, yeah, you know, not being really nice. I'm
happy it's my birthday, you know. And he's so we
you know. I'm like, what do you do? And he's like, oh,
I sell jeeps. I'm like, oh my god, I have
a jeep. No way, that's so cool, la la la.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
And so I said, you should listen to or watch
our podcast. That's what we do, me and my partner
and here. So we do a podcast and it's really
fun to watch, so maybe you know. And I had
my cards with me, so I gave him my card
and he said to me, he goes, oh, so you
work there. I go, well, no, I also work at
(06:15):
iHeartMedia and I do. I work in the newsroom and
I work at you know. I was just telling we're
just making chit chat, right, huh. So then it's time
to go because it's the college is over. Antonio is
getting annoyed. It's time to leave. He's like, we're out,
(06:35):
We're out at the valet. I'm like, all right, I'll
meet you right there. Let me gather my stuff. So
the guy walks me out to the valet, which no
big deal. Thought I was a gentlemanly thing for him
to do because I was all by myself at that point.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
I Anyway, I didn't realize that on my card is
my personal cell phone number.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
Oh oh, has he been texting you?
Speaker 2 (06:57):
He's been calling me NonStop.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
I've been I don't recognize the number because I always
think it's spam. But he he sent me a text
with a picture of a bouquet of flowers in the
seat of his car. For the last three days, he's
been driving to iHeart to drop off flowers for me.
(07:19):
But it's it was closed Sunday, it was closed Monday,
and then today my boss texts me and says, oh,
you have flowers at the front desk.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
I just thought you'd want to know. I was like, oh, no,
he cave. I'm in there. I haven't texted a back to.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Say I will picture of the flowers.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Now, yeah, well he's like I've been.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
I've been trying to drop these off and nobody's nobody's there.
I think I did text it back and said, you
know what, we're closed on Sundays and it was a holiday.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
But then I started getting a little weirded out.
Speaker 4 (07:55):
Have you picked up the phone once to him?
Speaker 2 (07:56):
No, Jesus, Well.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
No, I mean no, I'm I don't pick up the
phone and Eric calls it's business cards.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
That's well, I didn't think about it. I didn't think
about all the information. But it was kind of guy.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
She doesn't pick up the phone when I'm the worst
text on the planet.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
So yeah, he won't text, and I don't like to talk.
He doesn't like to text.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
I don't like to talk.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I hate texting.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Yet we somehow communicate, I know we do.
Speaker 1 (08:25):
So anyway, there are flowers currently waiting for me there.
Speaker 4 (08:29):
And those cars don't have your address, do they?
Speaker 1 (08:31):
No, they just have our you know, our website and
my phone number and.
Speaker 4 (08:37):
What's his name?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
Well on the call, it's different than the card he
gave me.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
The card he gave you.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
Where it's this jeep dealership. Wherever this jeep dealership was,
I wasn't sure where, I don't remember. But on his
card his name is Sean. But when the phone rang,
it was like a bell or.
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Something like that.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
That doesn't well, that could be a number of reasons. Wait,
how old do you think this guy was?
Speaker 2 (09:06):
In his seventies? Oh?
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Okay, I say, correct for you.
Speaker 2 (09:12):
This is another thing we need to talk about.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Seventy dear lord.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
No, not that I have, you know, I just I wasn't.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
It's only a ten year difference.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
I didn't make any kind of any kind of jestive comments.
Speaker 4 (09:28):
That doesn't mean anything.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
Well, then maybe he obviously he's trying to like.
Speaker 4 (09:33):
Okay, let me assume me. Let me explain the modern
dating landscape to you.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
Well, this guy isn't very modern, is he?
Speaker 5 (09:40):
No?
Speaker 4 (09:41):
Okay? If you how long were you guys talking for?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I'd say like forty five minutes? Maybe?
Speaker 4 (09:46):
Okay? Wow, did you ever leave? An impression? Typically a
prolonged conversa are you wearing that top? Typically a prolonged
conversation where a woman is showing interest in the guy's
like actual life, typically in like employ interests.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
We were sitting nicer. Playing in the game.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
Let me know typically implies interest. Now, no, no, no, he
has been a creep. That has nothing to do with
the fact. But that's why he is maybe taking yeah thinking.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
He hasn't said anything suggestive, He hasn't done anything suggested.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Or trying to woo you.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
It's a little did you talk a lot with your
tongue when you were like You're like he no, okay.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So anyway, that is currently the situation.
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Your roommates know that their lives are all now in
danger because you have a stalker.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
He doesn't know where you live.
Speaker 4 (10:37):
He'll find out. I think I could actually from your
phone number, probably find out where you live.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I'm sure you could.
Speaker 4 (10:43):
He might be able to too.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Why do you think I have a man living with me?
It's because it keeps I feel safer in this.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
Does he know he needs to protect you? Now you
have a stalker?
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Antonio?
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Hey, you know, I know a huge deterrent just to
open the door.
Speaker 1 (10:57):
He was he he you you did, but the don't.
It was too late by that time, because he had
walked me out to the valet. I couldn't find Antonio.
He wasn't order to be seen, and then I'm like
calling him furiously and this guy is sitting standing next
to me. I want to go, I warned her.
Speaker 3 (11:18):
I think a huge return would be dead. Any kind
of a stock would be to open the door wearing
that top.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
Do not hand out your.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Business card everybody. Right now, I'm going to beat up.
Speaker 4 (11:29):
I'm going to beat up to you.
Speaker 2 (11:31):
You with the Taylor swist stuff. I want to beat
you up. I want to beat up Antonio and I
want to beat up.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
I don't want to really beat up you. Speak your butt.
Maybe a little bit of spanking, is that okay?
Speaker 3 (11:41):
Yeah, even though it's not Saturday night, that's okay, Okay.
Speaker 4 (11:47):
I remember this guy.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
I didn't realize it was in my card.
Speaker 4 (11:50):
Well, they didn't write it down cards just to get
someone to listen to the podcast. It's not worth it.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Well, hey, that's how you get you.
Speaker 4 (11:56):
Know, that's not how you not by passing out business card.
Speaker 2 (11:59):
I can't individual, I can't, I can't, Okay.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
So when Marien and I decided to go on the
dating app together, we made this promise to each other,
and so I just been.
Speaker 4 (12:11):
Like, I haven't been one of you has found success?
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Yes, and me I when I think about it, which
isn't very often because I don't really have time, I
look and I'll go I didn't pay for it.
Speaker 2 (12:20):
So you can only look at like one at a time.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
And if you don't have a hinge, if you don't
like the guy or whatever it is that he likes,
if he liked you and you don't like him back,
you can push you know, the X, and you can
look at the next one.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
You can't look at all the people that liked you
at once.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
So for some reason, and Brian, I'm sure you're gonna
have a comment about this.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
I'm sure Eric you're gonna have a comment about this.
But every thirty four year old man in the world
is into me, and it's it's a kink. I'm a kink.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
Necessarily your age is on there right, Yes, yes.
Speaker 3 (12:58):
In fact, they have that grain any complex.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
Okay, So here's one dude.
Speaker 4 (13:02):
Men also are their standards can be if they're desperate,
their standards are real low. So they well, they may
think you're just easy because you're older. They're like, oh, perfect,
there she'll be desperate like a cougar's like a young guy.
She'll be she'll think she's lucky.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Oh I could see that break.
Speaker 1 (13:19):
Okay the graduate I recorded, Okay, this is my message. Okay,
this is a dude that messaged me voice messaged me. Okay,
my room Marie goes, you got a voice message him back?
So I did awkwardly. It's horrible. And then he messaged
me back, and we're going to play that.
Speaker 3 (13:39):
Are you going to play his first and then yours?
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Yes, and then I'm going to play some of the
other ones.
Speaker 1 (13:43):
Some guys on their profile include a little like a
little voice message like I'm really into and then they'll
talk or please don't do and then they'll talk or
you know, I'll play some of those two.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
But I got them all together. Here we go.
Speaker 4 (13:59):
Oh no, it's a message.
Speaker 6 (14:00):
Stand how to weave it? Any things for the voice
of face right, make things a littly easier. I'm just
leaving the beach. I just went quickly, just a good
jump in the ocean and relax for a little bit.
Speaker 7 (14:15):
What about you?
Speaker 6 (14:15):
How's your Sunday Funday? Going do anything special? Keeping it mellow?
Or did you get yourself into anything fun this weekend?
And I have to say, pretty eyes, I'm very attractive
and it seems like some fun you get to know. Well,
hope you're having a great guard and looking forward to
finding out more.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Okay, that was nice.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Here I go all listen anyway, just getting back to you. Yes,
it was a crazy weekend, and then I had to
work yesterday Memorial Day, like all day long today, and yeah,
now I have to get up and go to work again,
just you know, like the normal human being goes to work.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Anyway.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
I think you're really cute. Yes, I'm old af but
uh I we have fun together. And yes I am trouble.
I'm a lot of trouble. So he had said that
that's uh it's good and bad.
Speaker 2 (15:08):
Okay, this is a response. This is a response.
Speaker 4 (15:12):
You're funny.
Speaker 7 (15:12):
I like it.
Speaker 6 (15:13):
So the question is how much trouble and how much
fun you might and maybe we could text and talk
off this make things a little easier, and I might
love trouble and then uh I look forward to finding
out more. And you you might be able to be
look hot as fuck. So if you're good kisser and
(15:34):
have nice legs too, I guess I'll have to find
out and you'll have to enlighten me. Maybe we could
text and talk off this and make things easier.
Speaker 1 (15:46):
I said, okay, wait wait here, wait wait, let me push.
When we push, I said, well, oh god, all.
Speaker 4 (15:54):
Right, he's a little cringey. But I think you were
actually worse.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
Oh I know, I know you were.
Speaker 4 (16:00):
If you If I received that, I was blocked so
dry dry, Yeah, you were so dry.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
It's about work and stuff.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
He was like, you know, he said you actually his
first mention was really nice. If it was very nice,
and you just like, yeah, at work, so that's fun. Yeah,
I guess yeah. And then you're just like you're like
so dry, like all right sea, like I feel like
you were not putting any effort.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
Him.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Well, then he goes, well, if you have, if you
have like like like that, I said, I said, I
wrote him.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
I wrote him back.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
I said, I have a thirty four inches seam.
Speaker 4 (16:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Oh god, he doesn't know.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
That on my head on two legs. No body. Oh
I didn't give him that.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
The legs were like those comments were creepy. When he said,
he's like, oh, I like a little not whatever. He said.
That was bad.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
So here's a.
Speaker 3 (16:46):
Guy on can I can I record a message for
you and be like a house that would drive a Yeah.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Like this is her husband. She's a she's I need
someone to keep her busy. I approve of this.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
This is a dude.
Speaker 1 (17:03):
This is on his profile. Oh god, And this is
guy's one that sent me a rose or liked me
or whatever.
Speaker 2 (17:09):
Here we go. Oh wait, but the question is it's like,
all I ask is that you.
Speaker 7 (17:17):
All I ask is that you call me Colin because
Colin is my name. My name is not Colon. My
whole life, I've been called Colon. So I'm damaged by that.
Speaker 2 (17:33):
I thought that was kind of huge.
Speaker 4 (17:34):
I've heard that before. I feel like I know who
the heck his name is Colon, Colan's not real name.
Who is mister? Okay, there's one who mistakes Calin for Colan.
I feel like that's.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
You wouldn't know that's famous? All right? So this one
this one?
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Okay, wait, oh my god. Wait, guess the song here
we go. This was on this dude's profile.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Guess the song.
Speaker 5 (18:00):
Ready the King and his man soul, the Queen from
her bed and bound her and her boom, the seas
be ours and by the powers where we will?
Speaker 4 (18:23):
Are you kidding me? Which lever? Do you know what
that's from?
Speaker 7 (18:29):
No?
Speaker 5 (18:30):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (18:30):
You guys, don't you look excited from parts of.
Speaker 4 (18:33):
The Caribbean movie. Oh god, you're a little No. I
think it's so. That is like the that's insane thing
I've ever heard of everard this is his profile. It's
a shanty at best. I don't think it exists beyond.
I don't know if that's like an actual one or
just made for that movie.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
What what was he thinking?
Speaker 4 (18:52):
I don't know. That's crazy, okay.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
And finally this one is.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I was but like I was hearing that, I was like,
there's no way, like this sounds familiar, but there's no
way he's singing this song because it's it's not like
a real song at best, a sea shanty. Oh my god,
that's so weird.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
I know it's weird. And then this one is I'm
convinced that I'm convinced that.
Speaker 4 (19:14):
I'm convinced that the n Cuba men's basketball is fixed.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Oh okay, great boy, here's another one. Oh no, is
that the same one?
Speaker 5 (19:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (19:25):
That's it. That's all I have. I mean, this is
what I'm dealing with.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
That that's crazy, you know what?
Speaker 3 (19:32):
I what I would suggest becoming a nun No, actually.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
That's I want to go through a slut stage.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Remember, well, then put some effort into it. Well, I
don't have time, Liar, liar, you have time. If you
want to do it, maybe you can be sludy with
this first guy. No, actually I think the guy, the
first guy, I mean, yeah, sure, if you want to,
that's fine.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
He was fight I may have like burned that bridge.
Why because I was so cringey. No, he seems if
I can dial it up a little bit.
Speaker 4 (19:58):
Yeah, I think that's eligible. I actually think the guy
who said the NCAA was fixed, he's probably pretty chill.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
You probably tell him, They tell him that that the
nickname for your mouth is Hoover.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
You should the guy who sang the song, you should
ask him why he chose that song, because it's insane.
That is insane.
Speaker 1 (20:16):
All right, now you're gonna help me. Okay, this is
what we're going to do. Right now, We're going to
write a note to the first guy who's twenty years
younger than me.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
Well, if this is a slut phase, and who cares?
Speaker 3 (20:29):
I know?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
Truly, So here we go. Okay, his name, where is he?
Where is he? Where is he? In your return? I'm
not I'm going to protect this dude. Where did you go?
Speaker 5 (20:38):
Dude?
Speaker 2 (20:38):
Where did you go? His name is there? He is, Okay,
So after my should I leave a voice message or
just text him?
Speaker 3 (20:47):
Which I think because he said he said, let's text
and get off this, so I think.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
The okay, give me all right, give me, give me
some game, give me some game.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
Actually, the next step would you actually just be to
just text hi your phone number or just message him
your phone number.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
But that's that's also dry, just like lay it out there.
Speaker 4 (21:05):
That's the prize. That's not dry.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
No text, no words, no nothing, just my hey.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
Because we had a great day, here's my phone number.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
Brian says no.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
Oh, Marie says no either, and they're young.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
No, just drop This guy is yeah, because his message
said he said, hey, I'd love to get your phone
number connected off the app. That's that's like he's that's
the hook, and so you have to either respond to that.
If you ignore that, that's weird. So either just say hey,
let's keep chatting here and that kills it, or you
drop your phone number, say hey, cutie, Patuti, here's my
phone number.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
Wait, Maria, okay, Personally, I'll like going on a furs
day before the phone number.
Speaker 4 (21:43):
What that's crazy?
Speaker 2 (21:45):
Wait wait no, that's c Wait so you have to
make the date on the app?
Speaker 4 (21:49):
Yeah that's weird.
Speaker 5 (21:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Oh she likes to get it. She likes to get
it like going like she doesn't like to mess around
on the app too much. She doesn't like it.
Speaker 4 (22:02):
No, that's fine, that's why. But you get to get
the phone number, you text, you step the first date.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
So no other words but my but the digits.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
I would I would say, that's what I would suggest.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Okay, here we go.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
Never text the stupid Hey, how is your day going?
Speaker 2 (22:18):
I won't I'm not already did that scuffle?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
I know it is terrible. Okay, so this will This
will give me a little bit more street cred. Right,
just dropping my phone number with.
Speaker 4 (22:28):
No because that's like it's like a mic drop is
like boom, Okay, here we go. Ready, he got it.
It's gonna make him more interested. You can make him
way more since boom, there you go.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Okay, now psychology, Now she'll get a dick picked back.
Speaker 4 (22:40):
No, well maybe actually probably not that he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Well he might on in your experience, have you received
any of those through this app? From the app from
duce unsolicited unsolicited you can send up pictures no, I know,
but when you've gotten off the app with somebody from
this site, unsolicito.
Speaker 5 (23:01):
Pone number, just like like I don't give my phone number.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Have you have you solicited one?
Speaker 4 (23:07):
Okay, No, she's saying no, no comment, no comment, she
said anyone.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
No, No she's not. She doesn't. She doesn't do that
kind of thing anyway.
Speaker 4 (23:19):
All right, so the guy who Now, I think you
actually should message back to the guy who sang you
a song. But you need to fit because we need
to hear, We need to.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Learn to see what this guy looks like, because no,
I don't remember.
Speaker 3 (23:30):
I think he probably looks like Johnny Depp.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
No text him. That's a nice song. What's it called?
Speaker 6 (23:34):
No?
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Okay, do you like this guy? Because he has a restaurant? Nob?
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Do I like him?
Speaker 2 (23:39):
And he's he's like forty eight?
Speaker 4 (23:41):
That's did he leave a voice message?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Does know?
Speaker 1 (23:45):
But here's this, this is here's his profile. Unusual skills.
I can do the splits and cook like Boordaine. Okay,
he's straight, he's six feet, he has he's lying, he's
so he's eleven. Oh I know, totally Uh he's a
restaurant owner. Uh, he's into monogamy. He's got a lot
(24:07):
of tattoos. Never say no in life because it's short.
Try everything once, maybe twice. Say thank you to people
that treat you well. Be relentlessly spontaneous, laugh a lot.
He has a dog that he's kissing in one picture.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
Monogamous, yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
A random fact I love is water is wet, women
have secrets.
Speaker 4 (24:25):
Okay, that last part is kind of cringe, but honestly,
the rest of that's fine.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
And then here is him painting something in him at
I don't know, a rave like he looks like he's
at a rodeo. Yeah, he looks like he looks like
he said, so Fie stadium.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
He sounds kind of chrull.
Speaker 2 (24:44):
Okay, so do I like? Okay?
Speaker 4 (24:46):
So what do I.
Speaker 6 (24:48):
Do?
Speaker 5 (24:48):
You like him?
Speaker 4 (24:49):
I mean, how do you do that?
Speaker 5 (24:50):
Here?
Speaker 7 (24:51):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (24:51):
I already chatted with him. Here's here's Oh no. His
opening remark was actually pretty cool.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
It was there you are? That was nice, and I
went hello, because stunning, that's all. And then I said,
where's your restaurant.
Speaker 4 (25:14):
Here? Oh my god, oh my god, and didn't continue
from there.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
And then he said ocean beach.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
If we were on the other side of this and
we were like we were judging, these are the messages
we were judging, I would be roasting you, right, Oh
my god. Actually I'm gonna coach you regardless.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Why I have no practice? Out of practice?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
You said you love talking with people.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Why are you so bad because I'm vulnerable.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
I'm feeling vulnerable.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
This isn't vulnerable.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
It is because they're meeting.
Speaker 4 (25:40):
It's kind of That's like, this is the most surface
level conversation ever. This is the easy part.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Well, it's the hard part.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
But you should be good at this.
Speaker 2 (25:46):
Par for the compliment, I'm going to break that.
Speaker 4 (25:48):
Yes you do. Wait how long ago did you send
the first text?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Like a long time? Oh no, I thank you for
the compliment.
Speaker 4 (25:55):
You're double texting like hours later? Oh my god.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (26:02):
All right, okay, let me get let me give you one.
Speaker 4 (26:04):
Yeah, that's good. If you're gonna double text him after days,
you got to put in some serious effort here.
Speaker 7 (26:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
I'm liking. I'm liking, but I see No, that's creepy.
I'm liking the tattoos.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
No, love your tattoos.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Ink, love your ink.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
Yeah, that might be too young for love.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
The word love is too fine. Love in the ink
okay and the dog, Okay, loving the ink and the dog?
Speaker 3 (26:33):
All right, okay?
Speaker 4 (26:36):
So oh boy, this is like the most stressful part
of my day, serious, so painful.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
First the top, then this dude. I think you know,
I know this.
Speaker 3 (26:47):
I think something just happened to my colin, I mean
my colon.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
All right, to be continued. We will continue this, uh
wow next week and I'll let you know. Hey, did
we jump off?
Speaker 5 (27:00):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (27:00):
But please we jump off the page?
Speaker 4 (27:02):
The guys in each other's arms.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
I don't I don't want to know, because he's probably
going to sing some funeral.
Speaker 4 (27:10):
That's a beautiful song. What's it called?
Speaker 7 (27:13):
No?
Speaker 2 (27:13):
Why the hell did you pick a song from such
a shitty movie?
Speaker 4 (27:16):
Maybe it's noe hey the movie was not sure. Maybe
it's a genuine sea shanty. I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Maybe he dresses up like Johnny Depp.
Speaker 4 (27:22):
For wouldn't that be a great person to all talk
to at all? You're always looking for.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Podcast content, And honestly, the voice was.
Speaker 4 (27:33):
Can we listen to it again?
Speaker 5 (27:35):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (27:35):
Wow, it's so funny, left field, weird. But I'm gonna
wake up screaming.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
But I know I'm seeing. This is stressful.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
I think you should text them back like, oh my god,
you have so many apps on your.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I do, oh my god, faulty. Wait let me I
got I group these altogether, so hold on, let me let.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Me get wait way too the apps at it? Hold on?
Speaker 2 (28:03):
Where's the guy singing?
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Where's the guys?
Speaker 2 (28:06):
All I ask is that you here's the colond.
Speaker 4 (28:09):
Calling guy and then here we go.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Here's the song. Ready, guess the song.
Speaker 4 (28:17):
The King and his man had? And that would be
a demerit right there. Honestly, it's so bold and insane.
I'm almost kind of I cannot Actually his voice is fine.
(28:38):
It's just it's awful. Now it's not it's actually a
good song. Men's basketball is It's not the same guy.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
This is the different guy. Do you see double I
guy or no?
Speaker 4 (28:51):
Honestly, I give him a chance. He seems that's like
a normal thing to say.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
Kind of Yeah, it was a flirtation.
Speaker 4 (28:55):
It was just kind of like chance.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
All right, you guys.
Speaker 4 (28:59):
Holy crap, So you please message that I got back.
You have to message him back the singer. Yes, it's
so funny.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Picture.
Speaker 4 (29:08):
Yeah, I got We've got to know more about him,
because that's so crazy.
Speaker 2 (29:11):
All right, you know what, for you, Bryan, I'll find
out the story.
Speaker 4 (29:14):
Maybe he'll come on the show and sing to Brian,
I'd be crazy.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Would you like to be serenaded.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
From a pirate of the king if he dresses like
Oh god, I will literally be sec on the podcast.
Speaker 4 (29:29):
I see. I don't know what would it like. Why
someone would choose that song, probably.
Speaker 2 (29:33):
As Jack Sparrow impersonator.
Speaker 4 (29:36):
Dude, you have to date a Jack Sparrow. Persons so
much fun? Oh my god, what is wrong with the
two of you? I'd be so fun.
Speaker 2 (29:43):
You're all over the place.
Speaker 4 (29:44):
Oh me, okay, yeah, all right, sure, okay, well me
and my Yes, I had work. I went to work.
It was work. Yes, I can. I guess I can
be a little naughty. I guess.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
I didn't say naughty, I said trouble.
Speaker 3 (29:59):
There's two things that I never want to experience again.
This top and that song.
Speaker 4 (30:06):
It's actually it's actually a good song in the movie,
but it shouldn't be sung on hinge. You guys, I
have been traumatized.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
This amazing. Oh my god, you guys, calm down. This
I'm getting I'm getting I'm working on it.
Speaker 4 (30:23):
You're not. You're you're putting a minimal effort.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
You're helping me what I need to take charge. I'm
laying it out so you guys can help me out
take charge. All right, all right, we're helping your sister out.
I've got the power.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
I am a woman.
Speaker 5 (30:38):
I you know it.
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Whatever, I got the power because I got the.
Speaker 4 (30:45):
Okay, yeah, that's a good way to make sure you
never see a guy again.
Speaker 2 (30:51):
Really, okay. I would never say that to anybody who
I will.
Speaker 4 (30:54):
Scare off any winger two mile radios.
Speaker 3 (30:58):
I hope you don't ever say on a day what
you just said.
Speaker 4 (31:02):
Thank God referred that as your that's awful by who
huh oh, but that's what you said.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
You said, Well, I didn't want to say the P
worda the P.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
Word, vagina, no glitterius.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Alright, we're done, we're done, We're down, We're done, right, everybody,
all right, love.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
Your podcast, Love your podcast, babies.
Speaker 2 (31:25):
I'm sorry, I love you so much. I'm trying to
find your new step dad. I love you.
Speaker 4 (31:29):
Oh god, oh no, that was bad. All right, all right,
all right,
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