April 24, 2024 • 39 mins
Wed (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, we follow John Boy’s back into the danger zone with more “Dogs are better than…” - Tater has the latest Tatertainment News.. - We drop a mic at the front desk and listen in on Phil McCracken as he fills in for Bass.. - Terry Hanson strolls down his sports memory lane.. - Oliver takes the big girls on a cruise.. - and with summer right around the corner, it’s time to think about summer camp for the kids - and Carl Childers has got you covered ..!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:30):
Good morning, This is a Big Show on the radio.
Will to do your Home Day, April twenty and fourth,
and today's feature track from The Big Show. Bit Pops
Rocky by Charlie on the Speedway and the co Cola
six under a Sunday, May twenty six four Childers Crazy,
Go Nuts camp search for keywords go nuts. Check it
out to the Big Show dot Com click out on
(00:52):
their contest Bunny can't get tho.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
We'll call you.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
If you want to.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Play Beat the Blonde Eyes Day. Let's say who plays today?
Donald from Milton, Florida, Good morning, Donald.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Good morning John Boy.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Oh right, so Donald, go ask here's some questions. You
agree or disagree whether you think she's right or wrong.
Let's get you two bells for two buzzers, get you
a bull Snog prize pack.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
You ready to go?
Speaker 4 (01:29):
Sounds like a plan to me.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
All right, Well, Morley, I'm sure you know. The diamond
is the hardest precious stone in the world. What comes
after the diamond?
Speaker 5 (01:41):
A weekend at the grove park in.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
How you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Not necessarily the ring?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (01:51):
The rock?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:51):
For hardness, it's a sapphire.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
The sapphire is the second hardest stone. Donald, agree or disagree?
Speaker 4 (02:01):
Disagree?
Speaker 1 (02:02):
Oh, I don't know, marsy God that right?
Speaker 6 (02:05):
You knew that?
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Didn' sapphire jewelry starting off with the buzzer kill. Alright,
there we go, All right, tyler, if you put your
thumbs in your ears, pince your nose clothes with your
(02:27):
little fingers, and sip a glass of water.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
What are you trying to stop?
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Having friends.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Tombs in the ears, base of those little fingers.
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Look at all of you out there doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
You got you gotta try.
Speaker 5 (02:45):
You're trying to get rid of the hiccups.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Uh, the heiccup. Curing the hiccups? Donald, agree or disagree?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'll agree on that one. And that's the thing to do.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
It is, Yes, they're curing the hiccups.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
So we go to.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
A win or lose question right here, hear you, man
near you?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
So let's go to the experts.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
So, according to the experts, the easiest way for a
man to appear more handsome and youthful to the opposite
sex is to do something.
Speaker 5 (03:18):
Do what flash? A roll of hundreds would do the trick.
You're so good looking.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I'll get you to the grove park.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
My shallow I see you. Update is close.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Update the close, update the ward robe, so to speak, Donald,
agree or disagree?
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I trust here, I agree with that one agree and
lose weight.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Lose weight is the thing to do.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
Did you have to go and say trust me?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Well, we're gonna get Donald a consolation before you playing
with us this morning.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Donald, we appreciate you, Bunny.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
Well, we appreciate you. Thank you time man.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
All right, there comes your news women through Why dogs
are meddled than men, Why dogs are better than kids?
What's missing the women?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
We don't care y'all.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
On the other side, Good morning is a big show
(05:03):
on the radio. You can hang around about twenty minutes.
You'll hear mad Max right now.
Speaker 7 (05:11):
Why dogs are better than women hard water dogs don't cry.
Dogs love it when your friends come over. Dogs don't
expect you to call when you're running late. The later
you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Dogs will forgive.
Speaker 7 (05:49):
You okay for playing with other dogs. Dogs don't notice
if you call them by another dog's name. If a
dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it. Dogs like
(06:12):
it when you leave lots of things on the floors.
A dog's disposition stays the same all month long. Dogs
never need to examine the relationship a dog's parents never visit.
(06:32):
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Dogs do not hate their bodies.
Speaker 7 (06:40):
No dog ever bought a Kenny g or Hooty and
the Blowfish album. No dog ever put on one hundred
pounds after reaching adulthood.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Hey wait a minute, Oh go ahead.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to
get your BORNI gras.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Dogs don't worry about jerks.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to
in your wallet desk, in the back of your soft droll.
Dogs don't borrow your shirts. Dogs seldom outlive you. Dogs
can't talk. Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public. You never
(07:38):
have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go
twenty four hours a day. And finally, dogs find you
amusing when you're drunk.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Are you having travel at help? No, I'm thinking about
getting another dog.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Good Morning, Big Show's on the radio about twenty minutes
from the desk of Taylor Tamer.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
News is what to watch now. Let's get this Good morning.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
Bak Show, John Boyn, Belly y'all Man, Mac.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Man, Bye, Bud pod N but my boy, bad god.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Bay b boy, you get me making it from me.
You're one person who don't have to turn on the
southern thing. It's that could be a better take, or
try to hear you turn it hard the a't get
back and making fun of Randy's clothes in just a minute.
But right now I got the talking, which means as
(09:03):
my boy, shut up. I'm here today to help not
just blow off steam, believe it or not, I'm here
to promote understanding between the sexes. My original list of
twenty five rules for women has helped thousands of broads
around the world, and as head of the mad Mass
University Science Department, I'm pleased to announce the results of
(09:26):
our ongoing research project. Ten more rules to help women
understand me. Number one, Yes, it is possible to read
motor trend and watch a football game at the same
come wet bringing it up. Number two, men cannot take
a nap if you turn the race off. Waking us
(09:50):
up before the last twenty five laps has been scientifically
proven to cause permanent brain damage. Number three Mashed potatos
are a universal food that goes with anything, including pizzas.
Number four dirty fingernails do not make ammend look like
(10:11):
a hic. They're actually a sign of intelligence. If you
don't believe that, let's see you strip a sixty nine
shavel down to the frame, put it back together, and
have it run afterwards. Number five. New underwear needs an
extended break in period. This period lasts about eighteen months
past the point where you start trying to throw them away.
(10:34):
Holes are an essential part of the seven year break
in process. A pair of drawers are not officially worn
out as long as the waistband is all in one piece.
Number six. A woman's dream house includes things like a
breakfast nook, a sewing room, and granite countertops in the kitchen.
(10:56):
A man's ideal layout has a large commercial refrigerator, twelve
hundred watt microwave, fifty inch ren projection TV queen size hide,
a sofa, and a twelve bay garage with a metal
drain in the middle of a bar concrete floor. Perhaps
we can reach a compromise. Number seven don't cut your
(11:18):
hair ever. I know this was on the original list,
but it's so important I'm saying it again so there's
no chance of a misunderstand. Oh by the way, one more.
I need to throw in the hughes before your brother
is an idiot. Number eight. The kids are right. That
big round trampoline we saw at Sam's Club would be
(11:39):
much more functional in the backyard than another natural area.
Number nine. The old saying he who dies with the
most toys wins is actually true. This applies especially to cars, boats, guns,
and anything with a unified remote control. Extra points are warned.
(12:00):
Bottom can actually move under its own power. With double
points for anything that can fly. Number ten. Performances would
be better if practice was held more than once a month.
You have it, the latest set of rules to help
women understand men, learn them, know them, live them, and
(12:20):
quit learning my life. You'll have a.
Speaker 7 (12:27):
Good morning to make Jellison the radio hang over your
local news weather sport.
Speaker 8 (12:32):
This was royal, That is the king veto, slayer of
the visical, destroyer of.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
The mungole, and aggravator of the automanett all listening to
my two royal just as those gap toothed barbarians John
Boy and Billy A.
Speaker 8 (12:52):
You old big show A rise a lord of Beef, Rise,
Duke of Ellington, Rise, water of ten essences.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Up.
Speaker 6 (13:04):
You can make the eave you up, Good morning.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
You got a big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, we'll catch it with our board dog rise all
things NASCAR tomorrow, y' seengratulate one card team race team's
got one full time employee the team for Anthony Alfredo.
He lead lapper two and Talladega on Sunday.
Speaker 10 (14:03):
What do you mean he gets out and changes his
on tire.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
I'm just talking about there is one full time employee
like you get your crews come in on Sunday on
the race and they're racing some some of the big tracks,
some of the super Speedway. Anthony Alfredo, he's got the sauce.
Speaker 10 (14:24):
Knew it, just waited for it.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I was just so proud of myself.
Speaker 10 (14:34):
I'm proud of you for that.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
It's a sauce they could do with that. So an today, Hey,
I want to congratulate, and says he Anthony Alfredo got
the sauce.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
All right, day.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Tony, all right, go boys, go what to watch from
Taylor Tayman news hard. Let's back it down, put it
put it in neutral here coming up in minis.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Then we'll play wordy word. That's a big show. Rolls on.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
Good Morning, got the bag show on the radio. Coming up,
we play Wordy word winner gets a hat, t shirt,
tumbler and a twenty five dollars gas card from Law Tigers.
Lord Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing injured riders for
over two decades. With Law Tigers, you never ride alone.
Click on the link when you hit the Big Show
dot Com, hang on play four and ten minutes where
(15:24):
right now? From the desk of Taylor Tamman News, it's
what too much?
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Here's mars it Taylor?
Speaker 5 (15:30):
All right, all right, We're gonna look at the weekend
box office. See how they did Civil War eme in
second place, I mean first place for its second street weekend. Yeah,
right now.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
And what's that deal again?
Speaker 5 (15:45):
Hurt journalists who dystopian bleak future, The second Civil War
break is breaking out. Just doom and gloom and scariness
doing well. It's making lots of millions. God Zilla Kang
the New Empire dropped from second place to third place.
(16:06):
Oh excuse me, Abigail came in second place? All right, Abigail.
Abigail is a movie about can we start no? Yeah, no, no, no.
She's a She's a twelve year old ballerina, daughter of
a powerful underworld figure. She's kidnapped. Some groups of criminals
are hired to kidnap her, and uh oh, they take
(16:27):
her to an isolated mansion and.
Speaker 10 (16:29):
They call on someone who has a very special set
of skills.
Speaker 5 (16:32):
Yeah. I don't know, because this girl has big teeth.
I think she's a vampire, some kind of monster. Yeah, yeah,
AB's not this sweet little ballerina like it.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Yeah, little vampire ballerina.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
That's a scary one, Abigail. So a third place. Hey
you might have heard this. Godzilla Kang the New Empire
is in third. The Ministry of a Gentlemanly Warfare came
in fourth place. That's Guy Ritchie's move.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Right, So it just premiered at fourth plus.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
Yes it did. Wow, nine million is all it made.
I'd be very happy with that, but I think it
is one hundreds more to make it. Uh. The Japanese
anime movie Spy Family Code White came in fifth place.
If you're in the anime, Japanese anime, you would like to.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Have no Code White, Okay, we want some whities this.
Speaker 5 (17:24):
Very popular anime.
Speaker 10 (17:26):
Yeah, that's what they do, all right.
Speaker 5 (17:30):
Movies and theaters of this weekend Alien in celebration with
forty fifth anniversary of the nineteen seventy nine sci fi This.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Is the original was Sergoine Weaver.
Speaker 5 (17:40):
Yes, okay, it sounded different, but yeah, so.
Speaker 10 (17:47):
That alien, Well, I watch it every now and then.
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Miranda has made it, My daughter has made it as
far as the monster's first appearance leaves the room, and
that's it.
Speaker 10 (18:00):
Keeps trying.
Speaker 5 (18:01):
That's worth the money, right there.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Bring her back in the stomach. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
That's also out this weekend is Breathe. It's another dystopiancalyptic movie.
It's got Mila Jakovovich from Fifth Element. Remember her, Remember.
Speaker 6 (18:23):
The Element?
Speaker 5 (18:24):
Yes, Yes, multifis multifas Bruce Willis, So she's in it.
Sam Worthington's in it, Jennifer Hudson's in it, Commons in it.
And it's set in a world where oxygen levels on
Earth are rapidly depleting, rendering it uninhabitable. Another good, feel
good what else is coming out? Unsung Hero This is
(18:46):
a biopic about the pop group for King Country, well
known for their soundtracks nine to eleven Priceless Woodlawn. So
it is a comprehensive look at the family who migrated
from Australia to the United States in search of a
new beginning. So it's that's a good film.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Maybe that what else you got?
Speaker 5 (19:05):
Well, we're gonna wrap it up. Let's see some streaming options.
Road Kill Garage is on Max. This is where they
go and they rebuild the cars. Yeah, so it's season seven.
It's not new, but it's on Max. Now, thank you,
good night. The bon Jovi Story is on Hulu. So
they go through. It's a four part series and it's
a docu series. They go through the band's successes, ups
(19:25):
and downs. And Knuckles is on Paramount Plus. Knuckles is
the little creature from Sonic the Hedgehog.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Anybody getting his own deal?
Speaker 5 (19:38):
Knuckles Elba is the little crazy animal. And yeah, all right,
that's a wrap.
Speaker 6 (19:47):
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
I don't like when you can stop watching me?
Speaker 4 (19:49):
I can't.
Speaker 5 (19:50):
I can't me.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
It was incomprehensible, but it was on time.
Speaker 5 (19:58):
What do you want everything, Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Let's get us a winner.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Let's play wordy word here we go one eight hundred,
big show, he told free Line. We'll get a contestant.
What the heck get to Let's have two teams. We'll
play next. Good morning. It's a big show on the radio,
(20:41):
homming do you Wednesday Home Day? Today's feature track from
The Big Show, Good Box, drop to you by shot
him on the Speedway and the Coca Cola six hundred
happened Sunday, May twenty six four, Childers crazy Go Nuts
camp search for keywords go nuts perfect of This is
(21:02):
to John Boy and Billy. I'll be gonna make for
Mother's Day, of Father's Day.
Speaker 10 (21:05):
You know you love your mama.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Blah that showing an.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
At the Big Show dot com and.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Right now I went to everybody's head. I bout the bad.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Look, that worthy word, that worthy word. Let's meet the contestants.
We got Mark from Birmingham, Alabama.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Good morning, Mark, Good morning, John Boy, Honey, welcome.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Hey.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
We got Parker from Charlotte, North Carolina. Good morning Parker, Hey,
John Boy, Hey buds. All right, welcome Alabama versus North Carolina. Parker,
you gonna be on Tator's team.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Man, Mark from.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
The John Boy and Billy Sid's new two rounds boys.
Good luck to you. So Parker, you relax, Me and
Mark we go for the.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
First thirty seconds. All right, Mark, are you ready? I'm ready?
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Okay, start the clock now, you're not the worst, You're
the out.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Huh rhymes with it.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Go to school and take a no rhymes with it.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
You take one of these in school?
Speaker 1 (22:09):
What yes? Rhymes with it. Go home and get some,
lay down, get some, take a nap, get some. It's
still rhyming, still rhyming. Mark, cut that in your head, down, buddy.
A blank area on the highway. I wish I could
(22:32):
jump through there and then pour it in your head.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Yeah, but we can't do that, Hater.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
No matter what happens, I don't win. Parker, You and
Tater go for it. Randy, I do not need your help.
Speaker 10 (22:46):
I'm not trying to help you. I'm trying.
Speaker 6 (22:47):
No, you're not.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
You're trying to piss me off.
Speaker 10 (22:49):
No, I would never.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
I'm turning this whining phone down. I'll turn it up
if I need you. Okay, what did we get? Jackie too?
You get twenty?
Speaker 4 (23:02):
All right?
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Barker, you a dater? Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
The last one?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
And go.
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Another name for a bathroom is a blank room?
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Rest?
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (23:13):
All right? Hey, blank over here with your eyes. Yes,
uh you This swims in the ocean, swims in an aquarium.
It is a Yes. These eggs do this. This is
what they have to do for the chicken to come out.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Hat.
Speaker 5 (23:32):
You're when you have nothing to do, or just the
opposite of you're very busy.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Wow, all right, good, good work. Oh you put a
five on the board. Good job. I'm happy for him,
Randy Mark.
Speaker 5 (23:50):
I don't feel like his potential.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
My less me.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
And you see if we can like put some on
the board right here, all right, Bonny, I'm on, get
right down your head. Okay, he sweet starting the clock now.
It was about lunchtime.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
I am hungry. Yes, I'll go to Denny's and get
a grand Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
And then I'll go to the fire department talk to
the head guy, he's the fire Yeah. And then I'm
gonna dig for this in the mind and get rich
when I strike.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
And then I'm gonna I'm gonna eat one of these bugs.
Money is a.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
What bugs? Money? Yeah? I'm sorry you didn't know I
had rabbit in my cooler.
Speaker 5 (24:41):
Actually that was our conversation.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I was talking. All right, that's good job. Mark put
a five on that to a score of seven.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
I love story time. So Parker and Taylor two will
tie this up, three will win? Okay, Ready, Ready, in
the summer.
Speaker 5 (25:06):
You go to this kind of pool. You go and
you do what in it?
Speaker 1 (25:10):
You don't love me in it yet?
Speaker 7 (25:11):
This?
Speaker 11 (25:11):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (25:12):
You fill out? You need to fill out multiple of these,
like for an application.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Yes, wow, tied up?
Speaker 5 (25:19):
Hey you blank your arrival or you have a baby blank?
They do that. No, it's it's it's actually and it's
it's telling people about it, like you know, like.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Hey, welcome to the stage.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
He's the worst. Yes, wow, Yes, you gotta announce at
the end for the wind eighty seven, I had Mark
Dan Birmingham dog on. It was catching on there at
the end. But you can try again anytime, all right.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
No problem to get a shot out real quick, Yes, sir,
go ahead.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
The w X banks the Fox Montgomery, Alabama since ninety
four they risedal fourteen. J, B and B.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I had the boy Mark. Thank you there. Buddy, you
have a great day. And Parker you get the prize
back right here in Charlotte coming your way.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Good game, man, Thank.
Speaker 6 (26:10):
You appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Glad to be on here alright, buddy, hang on. Good
morning BIK shows on the radio. Bit request time. Paul
Davis out of Monroe, North Carolina, says, y'all are a
great exclamation point and I enjoy hearing Oliver's stories. Thanks guys.
All right, Paul, get ready to enjoy another one coming up.
(26:55):
Good Morning BIK shows on the radio requesting bitsiness morning.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Paul Davis out.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
Of mon North Carolina County, CEDA, the great say to
North Carolina Union.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
Oh gone had its driving my head. Oh here you go, Paul,
enjoy It is time for Oliver. Well, well, well.
Speaker 9 (27:21):
After a very long year, the Big Girls decided enough
was enough. They wanted to venture out, be part of
the world again, do something exciting and considering. Up till now,
the most exciting thing to happen to them was getting
up off the toilet unassisted. It probably wouldn't take much,
(27:45):
but they were ready to go for it. Brother, they
wanted to go on a cruise. Let me preach on it.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Now.
Speaker 9 (27:55):
This endeavor was simple on its face, a lively week
aboard a majesty ship with all the comforts of home
and luxury to spare. But logistically it was a nightmare.
If you've ever been on a cruise, you know that
it's pretty close quarters for even normal sized people. So
(28:16):
we had to find a cruise line that could accommodate them.
Lo and behold, we found one called Leviathan Cruise Lines.
Leviathan caters almost exclusively to the adventurously rotund. While most
cruise lines can accommodate literally thousands of guests, Leviathan keeps
(28:38):
that number to a mere two hundred. The average room
and a normal cruise ship is between one hundred and
twenty and one hundred.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Eighty square feet. On Leviathan, that's the size of the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (28:49):
Wow.
Speaker 9 (28:50):
The rooms themselves are the size of an average small
plane hangar. The furniture is all reinforced with the same
shock absorbers they use on the space ship.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
The dining rooms.
Speaker 9 (29:04):
Are the size of a football field. It's like Noah's
Ark with a buffet. Sounded like just a ticket. When
we got to the departure gate, it was beefy peeps
as far as the eye could see. The gangway to
the boat was built from the same materials whaling ships
used to unload blubber. It was a steady stream of
(29:28):
rascals straining against the incline. A few guests had to
be onloaded with an industrial wench. You know what's sad
about that? Listening to all the other fat people snicker
under their breath about Turby.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
The nerve.
Speaker 9 (29:47):
Getting to the rooms was also a chore. You see,
Leviathan uses a mathematical formula to make sure one side
of the ship isn't heavier than the other. They don't
want an uneven payload to result in a Poseidon adventure situation. Luckily,
the gals were quartered in adjoining rooms. It was like
having the top floor to the holiday Inn, and it
(30:10):
was still snug. There weren't many activities on the ship
because damn, what would they do for them. Aerobics is
bending over to pick up a drop doughnut. Karaoke they're
out of breath by the time they get to the
stage dancing see karaoke. They did have an attainment. They
(30:35):
had a Ralphie made tribute artis called Ralphie Might. They
were all disappointed that it was just some skinny kid
in a fat suit doing his act. There was a
fat Share impersonator called Extra Share. It's the first time
I ever thought Share was hot. The headliner was Rosie
(30:57):
O'Donnell or as they called her, slim as a first
time for everything, it was all going quite well. The
gal seemed to be quite content, but it wouldn't last.
They were all sunning on the lido deck, great slabs
of pale white beef, the flesh getting redder by the moment.
(31:22):
Then the purser made an announcement five words that would
set in motion a disaster of historic proportions. Special surprise
buffet now serving. The sound was reminiscent of the Great
Buffalo Stampede in dancers with wolves, fleshy hoofs oozing out
(31:48):
of ill fitting crocs, one piece bathing suits pushed to
their limits like big swolled land bound piranhas zeroing in
on a stray zebra. They jockeyed for position, racing for
their holy grail more free food. Maybe, just maybe, if
they hadn't all been slathered in so much sunscreen, disaster
(32:12):
could have been averted. But in their waddling rush, a
few of the larger stragglers slipped on the marble floor
and started to slide like chunky bowling balls. They toppled
all the hulking human pins in their path, and the
more that fell, the more they kept sliding, like a
rippling dimpled tsunami, all heading for the aft railing with
(32:38):
the advancing tonnage. The good ship Leviathan started to list.
The momentum was too much, and one by one, like
Lardie Lemmings, they went over the side. They tried throwing
them all life rings, but it was like trying to
save an elephant with a handful of cheerios. Besides, they
(32:58):
didn't need them. They all floated, but it wasn't over yet.
The ship turned around to pick them up, but couldn't
avoid them in time. Like a modern day Titanic, the
hull was breached by the impact, and the mighty Leviathan.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Sank to add in so to injury.
Speaker 9 (33:18):
The waves created by the toppling tubbies wiped out a
chain of small island in the Maldis And if you
can believe it, it got even worse. Like the mariner's
tail of the USS Indianapolis, a part of great white
sharks descended on the unsuspecting bathers.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
The water frothed with fresh blood. It was a horrible sight.
Soon they were all gone, the sharks, I mean, not
the passengers.
Speaker 9 (33:46):
These folks were promised a buffet, and apparently shark sushi
was just fine. The girls got home all sunburned and blistered,
but profoundly happy and me well, I'm making a bundle
selling their peeled skin to a hoty balloon company.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio. Biljie
John Boying for the album We Are Here The Help
Today's feature track from the Big Show.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
Bit Box like this one.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
If the Big Box search for keywords go nuts will.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Hey, mom and Dad.
Speaker 12 (34:55):
Summer's almost here, and soon the kids will be out
of school and in your don't forget summertime is your
time too. The last thing you need is to have
it ruined by a pack of screaming rug rats. Thank goodness,
it's legal to fund them off on someone else.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
But who I'll take him?
Speaker 6 (35:13):
Who are you?
Speaker 11 (35:14):
I'm Colonelcarl from Fort Childers Crazy Go Nuts Fun Camp
for Youngins. It's a perfect place for adults to neglect
their parental responsibilities and what not in a safe, fun,
educational way.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
Sounds great, Tell me more.
Speaker 11 (35:29):
Fort Jielders Crazy Go Nuts Fun Camp for young and
just sitiated on a hundred acres or real party woods
seized by the federal government.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
Is it safe?
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Turn right?
Speaker 11 (35:40):
Our compound is surrounded by only the finest quality, high
voltage no kill fencing that keeps the kids in and
the creeps out. And those rumors are a toxic waste
site and genetic engineering facility on the grounds make for
some party scary stories around the campfire.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
So tell me, Colonel Carl, is the staff qualified.
Speaker 11 (36:02):
Our staff is the highest quality of state certified counselors
rehabilitated by the federal prison system. All of them have
handed on training under the most difficult conditions, including ride control,
hand to hand, shive disarming, and personal shower protection.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
I'm satisfied, But what about the facilities.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
I'm glad you asked.
Speaker 11 (36:25):
Poor Childer's offers two spacious luxury units we call sheds,
one for boys, the other one for girls and little
sissy fellers.
Speaker 3 (36:34):
Every campers issued their very own.
Speaker 11 (36:36):
Personalized stob and quilt, and they get the thriller roughing
it by digging their very own sleeping hole, their old
fashioned open air toilets and the scrubbing up spot out
of cotton mouth pine.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
Sure, good high Jane off summer long, and.
Speaker 2 (36:50):
I bet you got some swell activities planned.
Speaker 11 (36:52):
M Young has learned night your skills and all plumb
last in a lifetime, like poison snake identifying and good Mushroom,
bad mushroom, and Houchi's Dollar Store sponsors. All our arts
and crass over classes are taught by Miss Melinda had
the big girl from check out there, and.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
They last all summer long. Hey hey, hey, hey, or
until she eats all the paste.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
I'm hip. That's good eating? What else?
Speaker 11 (37:22):
Bacon to eating the Young and Joe be traded a
Fort Childer's world famous Taste of the Wilderness buffet our
headshift Changsaw Charlie specializes in wild game quain mother night.
You're taking its course in that busy highway out front. Here,
there's always something different cooking at Fort Shielders.
Speaker 12 (37:42):
Safe Grounds, arts and crafts, good food and a cozy
hole in the ground. Hey, my kids aren't gonna get
lazy living a good life, are they.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Not a chance?
Speaker 11 (37:51):
Muster Our campers get plenty of exercise and fresh air
and land clearing class. What's splitting one oh one? And
bio hazard oister trabile and dirty syringe of cleaning. I
don't keep them moving, just wait till let meet our
mask ond owe me the bob cattle, keep them running
through the sun up Sunday own.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
I'm soul. When can I sign up for sooner the better.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
The summer station's almost full.
Speaker 11 (38:17):
Well, get on down to four Childers Crazy Go Nuts
to day camp for Youngins.
Speaker 3 (38:20):
We ain't hard to find, are we.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
Mister heck No.
Speaker 12 (38:24):
Two miles from the nuclear power plant on the left
right between the state's busiest four lane highway and the
railroad tracks next to missile Silo fifty four in Millsburg.
It's four Childers Crazy Go Nuts Camp for Youngins.
Speaker 11 (38:36):
For our model we If you love your youngins, turn
them loose hair. If I come on back.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
To you eat a miracle.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
Dead box is.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
Here all your favorites from four decades and Big Show.
Speaker 13 (38:49):
Ninety nine says he's fifteenth for nine ninety nine by
him once play manywhere shopping blipbox online at the Bigshow
dot Com.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Order Big Show Shop I follow.
Speaker 13 (38:56):
The number is eight hundred and four seven to one
stuff online service anim dot com.
Speaker 1 (39:01):
This is any Big Show today, don't let that happen.
Catching up John Obill and Late Rossers podcast man. Wherever
you get your podcasting, make it easy. Subscribe to us
with a free iHeartRadio out ay. Hey, rest of your days,
see you on tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
Love you MANE it
Good morning, This is a Big Show on the radio.
Will to do your Home Day, April twenty and fourth,
and today's feature track from The Big Show. Bit Pops
Rocky by Charlie on the Speedway and the co Cola
six under a Sunday, May twenty six four Childers Crazy,
Go Nuts camp search for keywords go nuts. Check it
out to the Big Show dot Com click out on
(00:52):
their contest Bunny can't get tho.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
We'll call you.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
If you want to.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Play Beat the Blonde Eyes Day. Let's say who plays today?
Donald from Milton, Florida, Good morning, Donald.
Speaker 4 (01:11):
Good morning John Boy.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Oh right, so Donald, go ask here's some questions. You
agree or disagree whether you think she's right or wrong.
Let's get you two bells for two buzzers, get you
a bull Snog prize pack.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
You ready to go?
Speaker 4 (01:29):
Sounds like a plan to me.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
All right, Well, Morley, I'm sure you know. The diamond
is the hardest precious stone in the world. What comes
after the diamond?
Speaker 5 (01:41):
A weekend at the grove park in.
Speaker 1 (01:46):
How you doing?
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Not necessarily the ring?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (01:51):
The rock?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:51):
For hardness, it's a sapphire.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
The sapphire is the second hardest stone. Donald, agree or disagree?
Speaker 4 (02:01):
Disagree?
Speaker 1 (02:02):
Oh, I don't know, marsy God that right?
Speaker 6 (02:05):
You knew that?
Speaker 1 (02:06):
Didn' sapphire jewelry starting off with the buzzer kill. Alright,
there we go, All right, tyler, if you put your
thumbs in your ears, pince your nose clothes with your
(02:27):
little fingers, and sip a glass of water.
Speaker 2 (02:31):
What are you trying to stop?
Speaker 5 (02:33):
Having friends.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
Tombs in the ears, base of those little fingers.
Speaker 5 (02:40):
Look at all of you out there doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
You got you gotta try.
Speaker 5 (02:45):
You're trying to get rid of the hiccups.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Uh, the heiccup. Curing the hiccups? Donald, agree or disagree?
Speaker 2 (02:52):
I'll agree on that one. And that's the thing to do.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
It is, Yes, they're curing the hiccups.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
So we go to.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
A win or lose question right here, hear you, man
near you?
Speaker 2 (03:05):
So let's go to the experts.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
So, according to the experts, the easiest way for a
man to appear more handsome and youthful to the opposite
sex is to do something.
Speaker 5 (03:18):
Do what flash? A roll of hundreds would do the trick.
You're so good looking.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I'll get you to the grove park.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
My shallow I see you. Update is close.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Update the close, update the ward robe, so to speak, Donald,
agree or disagree?
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I trust here, I agree with that one agree and
lose weight.
Speaker 1 (03:48):
Lose weight is the thing to do.
Speaker 5 (03:51):
Did you have to go and say trust me?
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Well, we're gonna get Donald a consolation before you playing
with us this morning.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
Donald, we appreciate you, Bunny.
Speaker 4 (04:05):
Well, we appreciate you. Thank you time man.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
All right, there comes your news women through Why dogs
are meddled than men, Why dogs are better than kids?
What's missing the women?
Speaker 3 (04:22):
We don't care y'all.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
On the other side, Good morning is a big show
(05:03):
on the radio. You can hang around about twenty minutes.
You'll hear mad Max right now.
Speaker 7 (05:11):
Why dogs are better than women hard water dogs don't cry.
Dogs love it when your friends come over. Dogs don't
expect you to call when you're running late. The later
you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Dogs will forgive.
Speaker 7 (05:49):
You okay for playing with other dogs. Dogs don't notice
if you call them by another dog's name. If a
dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it. Dogs like
(06:12):
it when you leave lots of things on the floors.
A dog's disposition stays the same all month long. Dogs
never need to examine the relationship a dog's parents never visit.
(06:32):
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
Dogs do not hate their bodies.
Speaker 7 (06:40):
No dog ever bought a Kenny g or Hooty and
the Blowfish album. No dog ever put on one hundred
pounds after reaching adulthood.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Hey wait a minute, Oh go ahead.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to
get your BORNI gras.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Dogs don't worry about jerks.
Speaker 7 (07:10):
Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to
in your wallet desk, in the back of your soft droll.
Dogs don't borrow your shirts. Dogs seldom outlive you. Dogs
can't talk. Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public. You never
(07:38):
have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go
twenty four hours a day. And finally, dogs find you
amusing when you're drunk.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Are you having travel at help? No, I'm thinking about
getting another dog.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Good Morning, Big Show's on the radio about twenty minutes
from the desk of Taylor Tamer.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
News is what to watch now. Let's get this Good morning.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
Bak Show, John Boyn, Belly y'all Man, Mac.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Man, Bye, Bud pod N but my boy, bad god.
Speaker 4 (08:42):
Bay b boy, you get me making it from me.
You're one person who don't have to turn on the
southern thing. It's that could be a better take, or
try to hear you turn it hard the a't get
back and making fun of Randy's clothes in just a minute.
But right now I got the talking, which means as
(09:03):
my boy, shut up. I'm here today to help not
just blow off steam, believe it or not, I'm here
to promote understanding between the sexes. My original list of
twenty five rules for women has helped thousands of broads
around the world, and as head of the mad Mass
University Science Department, I'm pleased to announce the results of
(09:26):
our ongoing research project. Ten more rules to help women
understand me. Number one, Yes, it is possible to read
motor trend and watch a football game at the same
come wet bringing it up. Number two, men cannot take
a nap if you turn the race off. Waking us
(09:50):
up before the last twenty five laps has been scientifically
proven to cause permanent brain damage. Number three Mashed potatos
are a universal food that goes with anything, including pizzas.
Number four dirty fingernails do not make ammend look like
(10:11):
a hic. They're actually a sign of intelligence. If you
don't believe that, let's see you strip a sixty nine
shavel down to the frame, put it back together, and
have it run afterwards. Number five. New underwear needs an
extended break in period. This period lasts about eighteen months
past the point where you start trying to throw them away.
(10:34):
Holes are an essential part of the seven year break
in process. A pair of drawers are not officially worn
out as long as the waistband is all in one piece.
Number six. A woman's dream house includes things like a
breakfast nook, a sewing room, and granite countertops in the kitchen.
(10:56):
A man's ideal layout has a large commercial refrigerator, twelve
hundred watt microwave, fifty inch ren projection TV queen size hide,
a sofa, and a twelve bay garage with a metal
drain in the middle of a bar concrete floor. Perhaps
we can reach a compromise. Number seven don't cut your
(11:18):
hair ever. I know this was on the original list,
but it's so important I'm saying it again so there's
no chance of a misunderstand. Oh by the way, one more.
I need to throw in the hughes before your brother
is an idiot. Number eight. The kids are right. That
big round trampoline we saw at Sam's Club would be
(11:39):
much more functional in the backyard than another natural area.
Number nine. The old saying he who dies with the
most toys wins is actually true. This applies especially to cars, boats, guns,
and anything with a unified remote control. Extra points are warned.
(12:00):
Bottom can actually move under its own power. With double
points for anything that can fly. Number ten. Performances would
be better if practice was held more than once a month.
You have it, the latest set of rules to help
women understand men, learn them, know them, live them, and
(12:20):
quit learning my life. You'll have a.
Speaker 7 (12:27):
Good morning to make Jellison the radio hang over your
local news weather sport.
Speaker 8 (12:32):
This was royal, That is the king veto, slayer of
the visical, destroyer of.
Speaker 9 (12:40):
The mungole, and aggravator of the automanett all listening to
my two royal just as those gap toothed barbarians John
Boy and Billy A.
Speaker 8 (12:52):
You old big show A rise a lord of Beef, Rise,
Duke of Ellington, Rise, water of ten essences.
Speaker 3 (13:03):
Up.
Speaker 6 (13:04):
You can make the eave you up, Good morning.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
You got a big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, we'll catch it with our board dog rise all
things NASCAR tomorrow, y' seengratulate one card team race team's
got one full time employee the team for Anthony Alfredo.
He lead lapper two and Talladega on Sunday.
Speaker 10 (14:03):
What do you mean he gets out and changes his
on tire.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
I'm just talking about there is one full time employee
like you get your crews come in on Sunday on
the race and they're racing some some of the big tracks,
some of the super Speedway. Anthony Alfredo, he's got the sauce.
Speaker 10 (14:24):
Knew it, just waited for it.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
I was just so proud of myself.
Speaker 10 (14:34):
I'm proud of you for that.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
It's a sauce they could do with that. So an today, Hey,
I want to congratulate, and says he Anthony Alfredo got
the sauce.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
All right, day.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
Tony, all right, go boys, go what to watch from
Taylor Tayman news hard. Let's back it down, put it
put it in neutral here coming up in minis.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Then we'll play wordy word. That's a big show. Rolls on.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
Good Morning, got the bag show on the radio. Coming up,
we play Wordy word winner gets a hat, t shirt,
tumbler and a twenty five dollars gas card from Law Tigers.
Lord Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing injured riders for
over two decades. With Law Tigers, you never ride alone.
Click on the link when you hit the Big Show
dot Com, hang on play four and ten minutes where
(15:24):
right now? From the desk of Taylor Tamman News, it's
what too much?
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Here's mars it Taylor?
Speaker 5 (15:30):
All right, all right, We're gonna look at the weekend
box office. See how they did Civil War eme in
second place, I mean first place for its second street weekend. Yeah,
right now.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
And what's that deal again?
Speaker 5 (15:45):
Hurt journalists who dystopian bleak future, The second Civil War
break is breaking out. Just doom and gloom and scariness
doing well. It's making lots of millions. God Zilla Kang
the New Empire dropped from second place to third place.
(16:06):
Oh excuse me, Abigail came in second place? All right, Abigail.
Abigail is a movie about can we start no? Yeah, no, no, no.
She's a She's a twelve year old ballerina, daughter of
a powerful underworld figure. She's kidnapped. Some groups of criminals
are hired to kidnap her, and uh oh, they take
(16:27):
her to an isolated mansion and.
Speaker 10 (16:29):
They call on someone who has a very special set
of skills.
Speaker 5 (16:32):
Yeah. I don't know, because this girl has big teeth.
I think she's a vampire, some kind of monster. Yeah, yeah,
AB's not this sweet little ballerina like it.
Speaker 2 (16:45):
Yeah, little vampire ballerina.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
That's a scary one, Abigail. So a third place. Hey
you might have heard this. Godzilla Kang the New Empire
is in third. The Ministry of a Gentlemanly Warfare came
in fourth place. That's Guy Ritchie's move.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
Right, So it just premiered at fourth plus.
Speaker 5 (17:03):
Yes it did. Wow, nine million is all it made.
I'd be very happy with that, but I think it
is one hundreds more to make it. Uh. The Japanese
anime movie Spy Family Code White came in fifth place.
If you're in the anime, Japanese anime, you would like to.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Have no Code White, Okay, we want some whities this.
Speaker 5 (17:24):
Very popular anime.
Speaker 10 (17:26):
Yeah, that's what they do, all right.
Speaker 5 (17:30):
Movies and theaters of this weekend Alien in celebration with
forty fifth anniversary of the nineteen seventy nine sci fi This.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
Is the original was Sergoine Weaver.
Speaker 5 (17:40):
Yes, okay, it sounded different, but yeah, so.
Speaker 10 (17:47):
That alien, Well, I watch it every now and then.
Speaker 7 (17:52):
Miranda has made it, My daughter has made it as
far as the monster's first appearance leaves the room, and
that's it.
Speaker 10 (18:00):
Keeps trying.
Speaker 5 (18:01):
That's worth the money, right there.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
Bring her back in the stomach. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (18:07):
That's also out this weekend is Breathe. It's another dystopiancalyptic movie.
It's got Mila Jakovovich from Fifth Element. Remember her, Remember.
Speaker 6 (18:23):
The Element?
Speaker 5 (18:24):
Yes, Yes, multifis multifas Bruce Willis, So she's in it.
Sam Worthington's in it, Jennifer Hudson's in it, Commons in it.
And it's set in a world where oxygen levels on
Earth are rapidly depleting, rendering it uninhabitable. Another good, feel
good what else is coming out? Unsung Hero This is
(18:46):
a biopic about the pop group for King Country, well
known for their soundtracks nine to eleven Priceless Woodlawn. So
it is a comprehensive look at the family who migrated
from Australia to the United States in search of a
new beginning. So it's that's a good film.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Maybe that what else you got?
Speaker 5 (19:05):
Well, we're gonna wrap it up. Let's see some streaming options.
Road Kill Garage is on Max. This is where they
go and they rebuild the cars. Yeah, so it's season seven.
It's not new, but it's on Max. Now, thank you,
good night. The bon Jovi Story is on Hulu. So
they go through. It's a four part series and it's
a docu series. They go through the band's successes, ups
(19:25):
and downs. And Knuckles is on Paramount Plus. Knuckles is
the little creature from Sonic the Hedgehog.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Anybody getting his own deal?
Speaker 5 (19:38):
Knuckles Elba is the little crazy animal. And yeah, all right,
that's a wrap.
Speaker 6 (19:47):
I don't know.
Speaker 5 (19:47):
I don't like when you can stop watching me?
Speaker 4 (19:49):
I can't.
Speaker 5 (19:50):
I can't me.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
It was incomprehensible, but it was on time.
Speaker 5 (19:58):
What do you want everything, Let's do it.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
Let's get us a winner.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
Let's play wordy word here we go one eight hundred,
big show, he told free Line. We'll get a contestant.
What the heck get to Let's have two teams. We'll
play next. Good morning. It's a big show on the radio,
(20:41):
homming do you Wednesday Home Day? Today's feature track from
The Big Show, Good Box, drop to you by shot
him on the Speedway and the Coca Cola six hundred
happened Sunday, May twenty six four, Childers crazy Go Nuts
camp search for keywords go nuts perfect of This is
(21:02):
to John Boy and Billy. I'll be gonna make for
Mother's Day, of Father's Day.
Speaker 10 (21:05):
You know you love your mama.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
Blah that showing an.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
At the Big Show dot com and.
Speaker 3 (21:11):
Right now I went to everybody's head. I bout the bad.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Look, that worthy word, that worthy word. Let's meet the contestants.
We got Mark from Birmingham, Alabama.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Good morning, Mark, Good morning, John Boy, Honey, welcome.
Speaker 4 (21:26):
Hey.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
We got Parker from Charlotte, North Carolina. Good morning Parker, Hey,
John Boy, Hey buds. All right, welcome Alabama versus North Carolina. Parker,
you gonna be on Tator's team.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Man, Mark from.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
The John Boy and Billy Sid's new two rounds boys.
Good luck to you. So Parker, you relax, Me and
Mark we go for the.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
First thirty seconds. All right, Mark, are you ready? I'm ready?
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Okay, start the clock now, you're not the worst, You're
the out.
Speaker 2 (22:00):
Huh rhymes with it.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Go to school and take a no rhymes with it.
Speaker 2 (22:07):
You take one of these in school?
Speaker 1 (22:09):
What yes? Rhymes with it. Go home and get some,
lay down, get some, take a nap, get some. It's
still rhyming, still rhyming. Mark, cut that in your head, down, buddy.
A blank area on the highway. I wish I could
(22:32):
jump through there and then pour it in your head.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Yeah, but we can't do that, Hater.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
No matter what happens, I don't win. Parker, You and
Tater go for it. Randy, I do not need your help.
Speaker 10 (22:46):
I'm not trying to help you. I'm trying.
Speaker 6 (22:47):
No, you're not.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
You're trying to piss me off.
Speaker 10 (22:49):
No, I would never.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
I'm turning this whining phone down. I'll turn it up
if I need you. Okay, what did we get? Jackie too?
You get twenty?
Speaker 4 (23:02):
All right?
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Barker, you a dater? Are you ready?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
The last one?
Speaker 3 (23:06):
Absolutely?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
And go.
Speaker 5 (23:08):
Another name for a bathroom is a blank room?
Speaker 2 (23:12):
Rest?
Speaker 4 (23:13):
Yes?
Speaker 5 (23:13):
All right? Hey, blank over here with your eyes. Yes,
uh you This swims in the ocean, swims in an aquarium.
It is a Yes. These eggs do this. This is
what they have to do for the chicken to come out.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Hat.
Speaker 5 (23:32):
You're when you have nothing to do, or just the
opposite of you're very busy.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
Wow, all right, good, good work. Oh you put a
five on the board. Good job. I'm happy for him,
Randy Mark.
Speaker 5 (23:50):
I don't feel like his potential.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
My less me.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
And you see if we can like put some on
the board right here, all right, Bonny, I'm on, get
right down your head. Okay, he sweet starting the clock now.
It was about lunchtime.
Speaker 2 (24:09):
I am hungry. Yes, I'll go to Denny's and get
a grand Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:17):
And then I'll go to the fire department talk to
the head guy, he's the fire Yeah. And then I'm
gonna dig for this in the mind and get rich
when I strike.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
And then I'm gonna I'm gonna eat one of these bugs.
Money is a.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
What bugs? Money? Yeah? I'm sorry you didn't know I
had rabbit in my cooler.
Speaker 5 (24:41):
Actually that was our conversation.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
I was talking. All right, that's good job. Mark put
a five on that to a score of seven.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
I love story time. So Parker and Taylor two will
tie this up, three will win? Okay, Ready, Ready, in
the summer.
Speaker 5 (25:06):
You go to this kind of pool. You go and
you do what in it?
Speaker 1 (25:10):
You don't love me in it yet?
Speaker 7 (25:11):
This?
Speaker 11 (25:11):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (25:12):
You fill out? You need to fill out multiple of these,
like for an application.
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Yes, wow, tied up?
Speaker 5 (25:19):
Hey you blank your arrival or you have a baby blank?
They do that. No, it's it's it's actually and it's
it's telling people about it, like you know, like.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Hey, welcome to the stage.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
He's the worst. Yes, wow, Yes, you gotta announce at
the end for the wind eighty seven, I had Mark
Dan Birmingham dog on. It was catching on there at
the end. But you can try again anytime, all right.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
No problem to get a shot out real quick, Yes, sir,
go ahead.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
The w X banks the Fox Montgomery, Alabama since ninety
four they risedal fourteen. J, B and B.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I had the boy Mark. Thank you there. Buddy, you
have a great day. And Parker you get the prize
back right here in Charlotte coming your way.
Speaker 2 (26:08):
Good game, man, Thank.
Speaker 6 (26:10):
You appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Glad to be on here alright, buddy, hang on. Good
morning BIK shows on the radio. Bit request time. Paul
Davis out of Monroe, North Carolina, says, y'all are a
great exclamation point and I enjoy hearing Oliver's stories. Thanks guys.
All right, Paul, get ready to enjoy another one coming up.
(26:55):
Good Morning BIK shows on the radio requesting bitsiness morning.
Speaker 2 (26:58):
Paul Davis out.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
Of mon North Carolina County, CEDA, the great say to
North Carolina Union.
Speaker 2 (27:06):
Oh gone had its driving my head. Oh here you go, Paul,
enjoy It is time for Oliver. Well, well, well.
Speaker 9 (27:21):
After a very long year, the Big Girls decided enough
was enough. They wanted to venture out, be part of
the world again, do something exciting and considering. Up till now,
the most exciting thing to happen to them was getting
up off the toilet unassisted. It probably wouldn't take much,
(27:45):
but they were ready to go for it. Brother, they
wanted to go on a cruise. Let me preach on it.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
Now.
Speaker 9 (27:55):
This endeavor was simple on its face, a lively week
aboard a majesty ship with all the comforts of home
and luxury to spare. But logistically it was a nightmare.
If you've ever been on a cruise, you know that
it's pretty close quarters for even normal sized people. So
(28:16):
we had to find a cruise line that could accommodate them.
Lo and behold, we found one called Leviathan Cruise Lines.
Leviathan caters almost exclusively to the adventurously rotund. While most
cruise lines can accommodate literally thousands of guests, Leviathan keeps
(28:38):
that number to a mere two hundred. The average room
and a normal cruise ship is between one hundred and
twenty and one hundred.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Eighty square feet. On Leviathan, that's the size of the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (28:49):
Wow.
Speaker 9 (28:50):
The rooms themselves are the size of an average small
plane hangar. The furniture is all reinforced with the same
shock absorbers they use on the space ship.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
The dining rooms.
Speaker 9 (29:04):
Are the size of a football field. It's like Noah's
Ark with a buffet. Sounded like just a ticket. When
we got to the departure gate, it was beefy peeps
as far as the eye could see. The gangway to
the boat was built from the same materials whaling ships
used to unload blubber. It was a steady stream of
(29:28):
rascals straining against the incline. A few guests had to
be onloaded with an industrial wench. You know what's sad
about that? Listening to all the other fat people snicker
under their breath about Turby.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
The nerve.
Speaker 9 (29:47):
Getting to the rooms was also a chore. You see,
Leviathan uses a mathematical formula to make sure one side
of the ship isn't heavier than the other. They don't
want an uneven payload to result in a Poseidon adventure situation. Luckily,
the gals were quartered in adjoining rooms. It was like
having the top floor to the holiday Inn, and it
(30:10):
was still snug. There weren't many activities on the ship
because damn, what would they do for them. Aerobics is
bending over to pick up a drop doughnut. Karaoke they're
out of breath by the time they get to the
stage dancing see karaoke. They did have an attainment. They
(30:35):
had a Ralphie made tribute artis called Ralphie Might. They
were all disappointed that it was just some skinny kid
in a fat suit doing his act. There was a
fat Share impersonator called Extra Share. It's the first time
I ever thought Share was hot. The headliner was Rosie
(30:57):
O'Donnell or as they called her, slim as a first
time for everything, it was all going quite well. The
gal seemed to be quite content, but it wouldn't last.
They were all sunning on the lido deck, great slabs
of pale white beef, the flesh getting redder by the moment.
(31:22):
Then the purser made an announcement five words that would
set in motion a disaster of historic proportions. Special surprise
buffet now serving. The sound was reminiscent of the Great
Buffalo Stampede in dancers with wolves, fleshy hoofs oozing out
(31:48):
of ill fitting crocs, one piece bathing suits pushed to
their limits like big swolled land bound piranhas zeroing in
on a stray zebra. They jockeyed for position, racing for
their holy grail more free food. Maybe, just maybe, if
they hadn't all been slathered in so much sunscreen, disaster
(32:12):
could have been averted. But in their waddling rush, a
few of the larger stragglers slipped on the marble floor
and started to slide like chunky bowling balls. They toppled
all the hulking human pins in their path, and the
more that fell, the more they kept sliding, like a
rippling dimpled tsunami, all heading for the aft railing with
(32:38):
the advancing tonnage. The good ship Leviathan started to list.
The momentum was too much, and one by one, like
Lardie Lemmings, they went over the side. They tried throwing
them all life rings, but it was like trying to
save an elephant with a handful of cheerios. Besides, they
(32:58):
didn't need them. They all floated, but it wasn't over yet.
The ship turned around to pick them up, but couldn't
avoid them in time. Like a modern day Titanic, the
hull was breached by the impact, and the mighty Leviathan.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Sank to add in so to injury.
Speaker 9 (33:18):
The waves created by the toppling tubbies wiped out a
chain of small island in the Maldis And if you
can believe it, it got even worse. Like the mariner's
tail of the USS Indianapolis, a part of great white
sharks descended on the unsuspecting bathers.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
The water frothed with fresh blood. It was a horrible sight.
Soon they were all gone, the sharks, I mean, not
the passengers.
Speaker 9 (33:46):
These folks were promised a buffet, and apparently shark sushi
was just fine. The girls got home all sunburned and blistered,
but profoundly happy and me well, I'm making a bundle
selling their peeled skin to a hoty balloon company.
Speaker 1 (34:37):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio. Biljie
John Boying for the album We Are Here The Help
Today's feature track from the Big Show.
Speaker 2 (34:46):
Bit Box like this one.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
If the Big Box search for keywords go nuts will.
Speaker 2 (34:54):
Hey, mom and Dad.
Speaker 12 (34:55):
Summer's almost here, and soon the kids will be out
of school and in your don't forget summertime is your
time too. The last thing you need is to have
it ruined by a pack of screaming rug rats. Thank goodness,
it's legal to fund them off on someone else.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
But who I'll take him?
Speaker 6 (35:13):
Who are you?
Speaker 11 (35:14):
I'm Colonelcarl from Fort Childers Crazy Go Nuts Fun Camp
for Youngins. It's a perfect place for adults to neglect
their parental responsibilities and what not in a safe, fun,
educational way.
Speaker 2 (35:27):
Sounds great, Tell me more.
Speaker 11 (35:29):
Fort Jielders Crazy Go Nuts Fun Camp for young and
just sitiated on a hundred acres or real party woods
seized by the federal government.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
Is it safe?
Speaker 3 (35:39):
Turn right?
Speaker 11 (35:40):
Our compound is surrounded by only the finest quality, high
voltage no kill fencing that keeps the kids in and
the creeps out. And those rumors are a toxic waste
site and genetic engineering facility on the grounds make for
some party scary stories around the campfire.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
So tell me, Colonel Carl, is the staff qualified.
Speaker 11 (36:02):
Our staff is the highest quality of state certified counselors
rehabilitated by the federal prison system. All of them have
handed on training under the most difficult conditions, including ride control,
hand to hand, shive disarming, and personal shower protection.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
I'm satisfied, But what about the facilities.
Speaker 3 (36:24):
I'm glad you asked.
Speaker 11 (36:25):
Poor Childer's offers two spacious luxury units we call sheds,
one for boys, the other one for girls and little
sissy fellers.
Speaker 3 (36:34):
Every campers issued their very own.
Speaker 11 (36:36):
Personalized stob and quilt, and they get the thriller roughing
it by digging their very own sleeping hole, their old
fashioned open air toilets and the scrubbing up spot out
of cotton mouth pine.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
Sure, good high Jane off summer long, and.
Speaker 2 (36:50):
I bet you got some swell activities planned.
Speaker 11 (36:52):
M Young has learned night your skills and all plumb
last in a lifetime, like poison snake identifying and good Mushroom,
bad mushroom, and Houchi's Dollar Store sponsors. All our arts
and crass over classes are taught by Miss Melinda had
the big girl from check out there, and.
Speaker 3 (37:13):
They last all summer long. Hey hey, hey, hey, or
until she eats all the paste.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
I'm hip. That's good eating? What else?
Speaker 11 (37:22):
Bacon to eating the Young and Joe be traded a
Fort Childer's world famous Taste of the Wilderness buffet our
headshift Changsaw Charlie specializes in wild game quain mother night.
You're taking its course in that busy highway out front. Here,
there's always something different cooking at Fort Shielders.
Speaker 12 (37:42):
Safe Grounds, arts and crafts, good food and a cozy
hole in the ground. Hey, my kids aren't gonna get
lazy living a good life, are they.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
Not a chance?
Speaker 11 (37:51):
Muster Our campers get plenty of exercise and fresh air
and land clearing class. What's splitting one oh one? And
bio hazard oister trabile and dirty syringe of cleaning. I
don't keep them moving, just wait till let meet our
mask ond owe me the bob cattle, keep them running
through the sun up Sunday own.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
I'm soul. When can I sign up for sooner the better.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
The summer station's almost full.
Speaker 11 (38:17):
Well, get on down to four Childers Crazy Go Nuts
to day camp for Youngins.
Speaker 3 (38:20):
We ain't hard to find, are we.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
Mister heck No.
Speaker 12 (38:24):
Two miles from the nuclear power plant on the left
right between the state's busiest four lane highway and the
railroad tracks next to missile Silo fifty four in Millsburg.
It's four Childers Crazy Go Nuts Camp for Youngins.
Speaker 11 (38:36):
For our model we If you love your youngins, turn
them loose hair. If I come on back.
Speaker 3 (38:41):
To you eat a miracle.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
Dead box is.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
Here all your favorites from four decades and Big Show.
Speaker 13 (38:49):
Ninety nine says he's fifteenth for nine ninety nine by
him once play manywhere shopping blipbox online at the Bigshow
dot Com.
Speaker 2 (38:55):
Order Big Show Shop I follow.
Speaker 13 (38:56):
The number is eight hundred and four seven to one
stuff online service anim dot com.
Speaker 1 (39:01):
This is any Big Show today, don't let that happen.
Catching up John Obill and Late Rossers podcast man. Wherever
you get your podcasting, make it easy. Subscribe to us
with a free iHeartRadio out ay. Hey, rest of your days,
see you on tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (39:17):
Love you MANE it
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