August 1, 2024 • 40 mins
Thursday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Grace Slick sells out to Flintstones Vitamins.. - Mad Max goes off the rails over a Big Screen TV.. - We’ve got a brand new batch of Dumb Crook News, with Florida Man Episode 3.. - The Sturgis bike rally kicks off this weekend, so we’ll talk with Lionel from Law Tigers - and get word of a custom built Big Show Motorcycle we’re giving away!.. - Oliver looks at being a man.. - and we’ll squeeze in a visit from Carl Childers be we close up shop for the day…
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
You got the Big Joe on the radio. More chances
for you the wind coming up.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
After your news weathers mart Yeah, this is your old pals,
you stein La Black when I'm not mooching some of
that fine Jacques Danielle Whiskey and I play the right
fine gumbo off my best friend Woodrow Boodrow and that
sassy sack of wife and his on Lizbeth.
Speaker 4 (00:23):
I'm listening to those tool wacky Cajun John Boy and
Philly right down on that there.
Speaker 5 (00:28):
Big show Woe. There's funny I Gary on Pete.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Go can do the new up and Adam. Welcome to Thursday,
first day August. Everybody doing good hair.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
We cracked over a brand new monthains twenty twenty four year.
Alright then please National Raspberry Cream Pie Day. Now we
had raspberry something yesterday. I think we had a couple
of Raspberry days in the road. Must be very popular.
Uh so, I got that's big Raspberry throwing their money.
(01:40):
National Girlfriends Day, Oh girlfriend, Hey, we encourage y'all girls
across the US to get together and celebrate your special
bond of friendship.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Just don't do enough.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
National ip A Day. That's a beer known as India
pale A. Okay, wow, India pail hell got their own day.
Speaker 5 (02:04):
Yeah, that's the Indian pel hel beegle.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
You're supposed to check it out then tick RPA National
Respect for Parents' Day. Well, shouldn't that be every day?
But house, I tell her or El Yeah, the love
you parents, of the workout for you. All right, three
(02:27):
days and this are saved up. We got our categories
and get that win and begin and let's see what
we're gonna win to beg Joe's on the radio. Good morning,
Big Shows on the radio. Let's get that first prize
pack out here. Let me see if I can find
it there.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
It is right there.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
It is a hat, t shirt, tumbler and a twenty
five dollars gas card from Law Tigers. Law Tigers motorcycle
lawyers who ride we on talk their boy Loneald the
mayor of Sturgis.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
That big deal is going on. We're going on. I
think we're gonna get.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Up with Lionel tomorrow. Lod Tigers cause they go on
to banner. When you go to the Big Show dot com,
check them out, listen number right now and win it.
It was nineteen o three Calamity Jane died at fifty
one years old.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
She was what was it, Captain Palmonter's girlfriend on f Troop?
Speaker 5 (03:28):
Okay, I.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Never watched that show. What seventy year old show you see?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Ain't had a wild girlfriend named Jane. I think her
character might have been based on Calamity Jane.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Wasn't she an?
Speaker 5 (03:43):
Was it Deadwood or one of those shows?
Speaker 6 (03:46):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
I don't know if that was Calamity Jane.
Speaker 7 (03:49):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
You're gonna have to look it up.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
I don't know, baby.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Anyway, History lists her as a hero, frontiers man, marksman,
dance hall girl, Indian fighter, and adventurer Wow fifty one
Calamity Jane ninety seventy one The King Richard Petty became
the first stock car driver to win a million dollars
(04:14):
Matter the King in seventy one Past the Mill Wow. Then, finally,
on this date in ninety five, British newspapers announced that
London residents can now purchase lawn and garden insurance against
damaged by mole, squirrels and rabbits.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
The new policy would cost twenty.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
Eight bucks a year.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
A genius little webbit problem beudy Well, there you go.
There's our categories.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
One eight hundred Big Shows you told free line, come on,
play out birds next.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio for your.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Thursday, August first. Today's feature track from the Big Show,
Big Box Story Time when Carl Childers the Lonely Ranger,
the search forgi word Lonely in the Big Box Hat
the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 6 (05:24):
Tear right out, Win Upburst. Let's be Upburst. It's the
game that anyone can win. John Boy and Billy give
the puzzes from the Big Prize.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Be let's go he contested number one.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
This should really be a lot of fun when you're
playing Upburst.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Have a hurry up and guest time.
Speaker 6 (05:50):
But you love the best time.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
You love a big shots.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Let's say head a norset from New Freeport and.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Good morning Dorsey, Good morning, Hey, welcome in here.
Speaker 7 (06:13):
Boy.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Let's get you on these categories and get you the
big Old Los Tigers prizpect.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
That's my playing you in Yeah, I mean, all right,
there we go in.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
The honor of old Calamity. Give us three famous Jane's
ready to go.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
On the Calamity Jane and Jane Seymour.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
All right, don't you all.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Met Jane Seymour out Cato far a couple of years ago, Danny, Yeah,
she still looks.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Good when you get rid of Boner. How long ago
was that a couple of years?
Speaker 7 (06:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Let's say, uh darn Dorsey, here we go, buddy. Five seconds.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Give us three nassy car drivers pastor President Goop Eddy,
Daryl Arnhart Sr.
Speaker 8 (06:59):
Darryl aren't Hart you look.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
At you when they weren't hards and there and for
the wind door seed three things you can ensure ready to.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Go our house and move well, Bam, bam bam. We'll
get your low tiger's price back up the new freeport, Dorsey,
glad you wont body first time caller, Good work with it.
(07:32):
Why does jump out cut you up on?
Speaker 7 (07:34):
You knew.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
What went around you overnight?
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Too many words, never bought.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Yeah, how you folks?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Leonard lou Well in tonight Leonard Well and you're Lipless's cousin.
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Yeah, I reckon, I gotta let climb to it. All right?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
So how you doing this more?
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Hell, I'm all right?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Did you get some breakfast? So are you still eating?
Speaker 5 (08:49):
No, I always kind of like you. Okay, I'm am afflicted.
Speaker 9 (08:53):
You know.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
I was born with a tip on my tongue. I
tracked to the roof of my mia.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
Wow, I've never heard of that before. Oh yeah, whole
dang family got mouth prawl his lip, don't touch Uncle
Claul got to jaw looked like a pair of dispenser
America bulldog because of Emmeline got the lizard tongue like
(09:20):
old jeans shimmer he steely ice cream off your cone
if you don't wash. And my brother Bart he got
two rolls of teeth top and bottom. I get shark
in jaw. That makes for one dang ugly family. Where
so the timber your tongue attaching the roof of your
(09:41):
mouth up, Yes, that sounds kind of awful.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Oh hell, it sounds like something that would be easy
enough to have fixed.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Well, you know what I thought about it. You know,
I wrote a letter from the v A hospital. I
ain't sent it yet, though, Why up, can't.
Speaker 6 (10:01):
Let that that?
Speaker 5 (10:02):
Come on?
Speaker 1 (10:03):
What have you seen the doctor at all?
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Yeah? I went once, had to cut your visit short, you.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
Know how come Well, when he told me to check
out my tongue and say, oh, I figured that he's
making spoiling.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Isn't it uncomfortable?
Speaker 10 (10:21):
No?
Speaker 7 (10:22):
Not really.
Speaker 5 (10:23):
You know there's stuff I can't do.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Of course.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
It's kind of hard on the grand kids.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You know, well, how is it hard on the grandkids?
Speaker 5 (10:31):
Well, you know youngins or plumb crazy about them farting noise.
I can't do that. I'll showed you. Look see what
I mean. You can't do it right right after the
tongue in.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
There show that's a pretty pitiful allah.
Speaker 5 (10:46):
Yeah, they're kind of the put out by it too.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
That must break your heart.
Speaker 5 (10:50):
Oh hell, I'm on.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
If nothing else, he kind of kind of sounds like
to be inconvenient.
Speaker 6 (10:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
Yeah, it's a burden on my fella. That's lots of
stuff you can't do, you know, like you can't stick
your tongue out of folks. You gotta just rely on
flipping them the murdens. I ain't never had an ice
cream cone, I can remember.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Kind of put your.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
Car boss on a fellaw's love life too, you know.
I guess after all, you can't get the ladies listen.
Speaker 5 (11:22):
You can whistle at them, say what she means.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
So if you're not making time with the ladies. You
must becoming low. Oh hell, im truth be told. I've
been married about thirty years.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Really, what's your wife like?
Speaker 5 (11:38):
Everything but me far I can tell.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
I'm sure she loves you.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
You know what she can give me for Christmas this year?
Speaker 4 (11:48):
I can't imagine a book of daggum tongue questions like
Lipper says.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Why do you drink about life that wasn't very nice?
Did it hurt your feeling?
Speaker 11 (11:58):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (11:59):
Hell, iimy wells and I got to go out there.
I don't think I got the food bugger coming on.
The old lady wants to take me home and take
my temperature. That's just I can't hold that for momy
running my tongue.
Speaker 5 (12:13):
You getting the PreCure.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
Poor god, he.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
Get a cup of coffee.
Speaker 7 (12:20):
On the way out.
Speaker 5 (12:21):
I'm gonna.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Chun boy and Billy.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Exactly my point, my ball cap, young friend.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Good morning radio, dumb right, good morning, and this will
(12:59):
be Joe hold the radio all right, way God, here
we go.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
It's time for the grumpy old man.
Speaker 12 (13:10):
Ah flibbity flu. I'm old and I hate fake boots.
In my day, we didn't need no silly cone stuffed blouse,
button busting, sweater stretching inflatable gravity to fire an injection,
molded billy goat, haunting man magnets. We were happy with
(13:33):
the way God Almighty made us. If you had a
huge set of lugwats, good for you, and if you
were a woman, even better. In my day, the only
fake hooters we needed were the wooden owls on the
bond to keep the crows away, and the only man
made jugs we wanted to get our hands on was.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Holding on moonshine fake boots.
Speaker 12 (14:00):
When I was a boy, we liked them all natural,
baby swing, low sweet chariots. But not everyone was stuffed
like Lulu Roman from he Haw. Some girls got passed
over by the fun bak fairy like old plywood Paddy
Myrtle Bank. She was flatter than a plate of cold pea.
(14:24):
From the neck up, she was Hollywood starlet pretty. From
the neck down, she was like the before picture on
the Charles Atlas hands. She made Don Notch look like
Jane Mansfield. Her cup size was just like her grade
point average sea mines, and the only time a boy
would climb on her was in the winter when they
(14:47):
used her as a toboggan and the girls, the girls,
all the girls at school made horrible sport of her,
but she had.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
The last laugh.
Speaker 12 (14:57):
The day of the big fire and the school's gym,
the only way out was through a tiny little window
plywood Teddy shot through the opening like a monkey spitting
a watermelon. Scene with all them top heavy homeroom honeys
didn't stand a chance, and the fire bird for three
days because of all that boob fatnt. The coroner rooined
(15:18):
death by d cup and nobody ate the barbecue chicken
breast in a cafeteria for three months because someone found
a nipple on it.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
Don't ruin your appetite.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
We're having Bobby Cutie for lunch.
Speaker 12 (15:30):
All hailed this age of superficiality, and we like it.
Speaker 5 (15:35):
We loved it. Fake boobs.
Speaker 6 (15:39):
Bah.
Speaker 12 (15:41):
They're all the same. Some are big, some are bigger,
some are downright unwieldy.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
But they're all the same, and they got no gift
to them.
Speaker 7 (15:50):
Dan nam It.
Speaker 12 (15:51):
It's like letting onto a traffic cone. I can't work
with that. I got the arthritis, and when I do
the stop short, I want to grab something grabbable, not get.
Speaker 5 (16:04):
A fistful of a bulletproof vest.
Speaker 12 (16:08):
Real boobs are all different, like snowflakes, dirty sexy snowflakes.
And if you want to talk about different, I'll tell
you about old frieda flap jack bucklewinner. What a sight
downright huge, And by that I mean they were huge
and hung down into the right and the older she got,
(16:30):
the more down they got, like a pair of dimply
old wind socks on a calm day. And then she
turned eighteen who and it was downhill the whole way.
They bought her from going to square dancers because when
someone would spin your partner, her log flap and breastacles
(16:50):
would pop out, and she.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Cleared the room like a three stoochi short. Did she care?
Speaker 1 (16:54):
Hell no, She could have had.
Speaker 12 (16:57):
Him surgically altery did, but she she loved him, and
so did any red blooded mail jibbledy doody.
Speaker 9 (17:06):
Do look at me.
Speaker 5 (17:08):
I'm in in Bret Moron, not toothless by a pair of.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Backwards and a candas call the preacher. I'm in love
with stretch boobstraw.
Speaker 5 (17:18):
And we liked it, We loved it.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
Seek good morning, you got the big show on the radio.
More chances you to win coming up after your news
weathers Barts. I stand on the hill, but not for
a thrill, for the breath of a fresh keel. And
never mind the man who contemplates doing away with license plates.
(17:46):
He stands alone anyhow, Bacon.
Speaker 13 (17:49):
The cookies of discontent by the heat of the longer
man fam leaving their sword and then like in petrygo
dot dot dot, you know, kind of host set up.
Speaker 9 (18:03):
Leaving that soul hot in the waters of the Medulla
Oblonga with John Boy and Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
You like that with John Boy, Good Morning.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
That's a big shon the radio for your Thursday August First,
you're having a birthday today.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Happy birthday.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
You're sharing one with the god that I My former
University of North Carolina basketball coach, Roy william coach. Roy
is seventy four years old today. I'm not gonna name her,
but the girl at the beach makes great chicken salad
famenta cheese, okay, And she would leave chicken salad on
(19:25):
Roy Williams porch.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
As as a gift as a gift okay, okay, right,
like in a paper bag that was on fire. Yeah,
as you would like, you know, to watch him come out.
You know and get it. Oh so she was wait
after she was not so he would notice.
Speaker 14 (19:48):
Oh well, I guess it's kind of like a chicken
salad stalker. Yeah, that would definitely classify as a stalker.
But I mean he ate the chicken salad and really
liked it.
Speaker 5 (20:00):
And he didn't know who who broke that.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
There Another time she was coming and was a twenty
dollars bill under one departed plants, and she.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Just thought that's for me probably or or the famer boy.
Speaker 5 (20:16):
I'm not sure, but I'm here and it's here, so it's.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Fine a boy till he paid me for this. I
never looked at it like that the other way she
told it was for so I.
Speaker 7 (20:28):
All right.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Happy birthday, Roy, try to perment a cheese.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio, John Boys Wonderful
Thing Giveaway number one hundred and twelve. See the frame
photo of me with rock legend Grace Slick from Jefferson Airplane.
Let's celebrate.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
And now here's Grace Slick for Flintstone vitamins.
Speaker 10 (20:56):
One looks like bunny and one.
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Pill shaped like bread.
Speaker 10 (21:04):
Hi, boys and girls, I'm Gracie Slick.
Speaker 13 (21:06):
You know.
Speaker 10 (21:07):
When I was on the road with Jefferson Airplane. In
the sixties, I chased a lot of white rabbits, and
I usually chase them with Scotch Hey, but I don't
get high anymore now. I like to get flint stoned.
I just drop a couple of Vennies or Dinos before
a concert, and soon I'm getting a buzz on vitamins
and minerals, just like that modern Stone age family down
(21:29):
the street. Now, when the white knight is talking backwards,
I know my turntable's probably just in reverse. So when
the men on the chessboard get up and tell you
where to go, tell him you're going for some Flintstone vitamins.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
And all right, Grace still coming in handy in a
(22:07):
couple of ways.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Here on the Big Show, let's play John Boydjevity, y'all
need to review yesterday's question. We found out to take
seven days in an oven to make one of these,
at least for the white ones. Other solid colors take
a little longer, and the striped ones take fifteen days.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
The billiard balls.
Speaker 8 (22:25):
Was what that was?
Speaker 2 (22:26):
You thought it was a stork when we were mixing
up our jeopardies to babies storks of I'm sorry that's funny.
I just need to work shop. Well, you just okay,
Today's John Boyjeparty. On the average, this household appliance spends
about three hours a week in the own position.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
What is the washing machine on?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Spin cycle? Washing machine?
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (22:52):
Why are you looking at me?
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Do you really know?
Speaker 6 (22:57):
You know?
Speaker 11 (22:57):
You know?
Speaker 5 (22:58):
I'll just say that.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Okay, that's got I'm a good guess. Actually, now that
I'll think about all what you all got to bet?
It was not correct one eight hundred Big Show. No,
it's good it wasn't correct because they would have to
do another question.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Don't come out. I'm getting my own nerves again. You
are doing a great shut up. One ain't under Big Show?
You told free Lon. We go to we get the winner.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
We play John Boy Jeopardy next. Good morning, this is
(23:45):
a big show on the radio. We're on it to
you Thursday. Today's feature track from The Big Show, Big
Box story Time with Carl Childers the Lonely Ranger. You
were lonely hit the Big Box at the Big Show
dot comy Right now, let's play Yes live across America.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
It's John Boy Japanese and now your host.
Speaker 14 (24:07):
He says, if there's something getting turned on in his
house about three hours a week.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
That's a really good week. He's John Boy.
Speaker 5 (24:17):
Thank heavy.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Le's headed Jesse out of Rogersville, Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Good morning, Jesse, Hello boy, Hey budd, we're all good.
Welcome in here.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Jesse got the first shot at John Boy Jeopardy. On
the average, this household applying spends about three hours a
week in the on position.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
You got, Jesse, boy, I'm gonna yeah, I'm gonna play.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Iron going with an iron? Lesay, is it an iron?
Speaker 6 (24:51):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (24:52):
Look at Jesse.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
All right, Buddy, good work.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
You've got the big old prize package of those mount
Olive pickles. I got a cool hat, the T shirt,
three pack of pickle juicers, and I want to celebrate
Mount Olive, proud partner of the National Wheelchair Basketball Association.
Men's and women's teams will go for the gold next
month of the Paralympic Games in Paris. Go Team USA
(25:21):
and go just in Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Buddy, congratulations, Thank you, John Boy.
Speaker 8 (25:26):
Heylusen.
Speaker 10 (25:26):
I'm I'm a first time caller.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
All right, then.
Speaker 8 (25:31):
Do you care if I give a shout out?
Speaker 7 (25:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
I'd love for you too.
Speaker 7 (25:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
I just want to give a shout out to my
lovely kids and my beautiful wife.
Speaker 4 (25:40):
I don't know how how she's put up with me
for so long that I want to give them a
shout out.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Well, right, Jesse, I appreciate you and your family. Listen
to the Big Show bottom of the hour, top of
your news. Oh right, special Mad Mike's on this Thursday morning, right.
Speaker 7 (26:03):
On the out of side.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Good morning, it's a big show.
Speaker 5 (26:41):
On the radio.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Read it got this call, Good morning, Big shown.
Speaker 7 (26:47):
Y'all bore many, y'all, alad make fact, how's it going?
Take a while? I guess you're mad, mad, I'm plumpiculated.
In fact, I don't even want to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Well, if you don't want to talk about it, alright, if.
Speaker 7 (27:00):
You're gonna drag it out of me, boys, The climate
change crowd has discovered another urgent threat to the survival
of planet Earth big screen TVs. I kid you not
says here. Nitrogen tryphoura out of gas used in the
manufacture of flat screen TV monitors is being blamed for
(27:24):
damaging the atmosphere and accelerating the process of global warming.
The gas is estimated to be getting this seventeen thousand
times as powerful as carbon the oxide. That's right, seventeen
thousand times. Please, if they don't make up a number,
(27:44):
why don't they just say a bajillion and get done
with it, My budd, I tell you boys, between the
health Nazis and the climate nuts, I'm starting to feel
kind of picked on lately. Oh, don't put all that
salt on your food. Oh your on to drive that
big old trump. Oh can't put three on in your
air conditioner no more? Oh you need to recycle your
(28:06):
plastic bottles. Oh, when life bubs ain't no good, you
need to get these new ones and cost two bucks
to pop. And now it's your TV said it is
killing the hose arm layer. Quit on, y'all. Just come
out against beer big knockers in a sports section of
the paper. While you're at it, Just the clear war
on everything. It makes my life worth living. I'll tell
(28:29):
you one thing right now, y'all ain't getting my big screen.
If what TV said it's cheap, big and got a
good picture, I don't care if it runs on platonium. Hey,
if you lift his scientists need a project to keep
you busy, how about coming up with something that'll run
my pickup. Trump don't cost five bunchs of gallon. That's
(28:50):
why I bought the dead gum big screen in the
first place. Gass so high can't afford to do nothing,
sit home and watch TV. So listen, a big head.
We got enough problems. What we need are some solutions.
Y'all ain't gonna do something positive to sitting down, shut
up and quit word in my life. God boy, Billy,
(29:13):
y'all have a nice day.
Speaker 5 (29:43):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
That's a big showing already you running through your Thursday,
first day of August. It's time for dumb crook news,
dumb cruk story sending by you and the big showd
listeners from all over the world dress will follow this.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Report, which is entitled Florida Man, Chapter three.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Two curious Fleigler County deputies turned their cruiser around after
seeing an older Florida man wearing nothing but a blue
speedo wave at him.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
As they drove by.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
As they approached a man, he told him he had
been smoking some wicked weed and they should try a bowl.
The debities declined, but asked where he had gotten it,
but a man then proudly led him to his backyard
where his pot plant was still growing.
Speaker 6 (30:35):
I did.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
A sixty five year old was arrested for possession and
cultivation of marijuana. When a Pensacola, Florida man showed up
in a local er with a gunshot wound to his
wrists and a bizarre explanation to go along with it,
hospital staff called the police. Man told the responding debities
he had decided to put down seven three month old
(30:57):
shepherd mixed puppies because he couldn't find homes for him.
He said, he loaded his handgun and began gathering up
the dogs in his arms with a gun in his
right hand.
Speaker 10 (31:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
One of the puppies wiggled around and put its pall
on the trigger of the gun, fired it, wounding the
man's left wrist.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Justice man was charged with animal cruelty. The puppies were
taken to a local animal shelter. All adopted. Want the
old puppy shoots Florida man.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
I named that one triggered.
Speaker 7 (31:29):
Hey.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
The Sodo County, Florida man stole the high end four
wheeler and ducked into a nearby gated community to hide.
Police received numerous calls about somebody riding through homeowners properties
on a red four wheeler. So when police arrived, the
man of the approach to homeowner and asked me could
use her electrical outlet to charge his ankle monitor. He
(31:51):
was arrested, adding grand theft although to his already long
list of offenses. A Crestview, Florida man was called on
neighborhoods security cameras committing a series of car and home burglaries.
On the footage, you can see him stealing a handgun
from one of the vehicles and stuffing a pistol into
the front of his pants.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Short time later you've seen checking more cars, brazenally checking
if a lowerd garage door could be raised, But as
he'd bent over to try to lift it, the stolen
gun discharged, shooting him in the thigh. The loud gun
shot and subsequent screams of agony loaed the homeowner, who
called the police. Taken to an air by hospital trayment end,
(32:33):
then to a jail for booking, and finally a Daytona,
Florida man called nine to one one to report that
he and his girlfriend were trapped inside of a lot
closet on the campus of DAYTONA State college. Man said
they had gotten trapped inside the space two days earlier
while hiding from some men who had been chasing him. Well,
(32:56):
when police arrived, they found a couple inside of a
janitor's closet in the school's environmental science building, and after
freeing the pair, they made several interesting discoveries. One, there
was drug paraphernalia and evidence of drug use found inside
of the closet. Two, they were not students at the
facility and did not have permission to be on campus property. Three,
(33:21):
those men that were chasing them were campus security. And
best of all, the closet they were trapped inside of
had no lock. They had apparently spent two days trying
to push open the door that.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Needed to be pulled. I told you that stuff for
makeel stupid.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Didn't wan to do or charged with trespassing, evaiting police,
possession of drug paravenelia, and stupidity.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Yes, have you got dumb Crook News?
Speaker 2 (33:56):
Mail to Numb Crook News John Bynbelly and peelbox one nine,
Charlotte and C two eight two one nine Email anybody
from me at the Big Show dot com.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Good morning, you got the Big Show on the radio.
More chance for you to win?
Speaker 5 (34:13):
Coming up? After your news, weather and sports.
Speaker 9 (34:16):
Mama.
Speaker 11 (34:18):
All I wanted to do was have a let us
sandwich on gluten bread, a tall glass of.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
Buttermilk, and crawl under a bearskin rug.
Speaker 11 (34:27):
Why do I have to listen to that John Boy
person and Billy whoever on that noisy big show button, Mama, Good.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Morning, It's a big show on the radio right here, summertime.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Here we are August, the first step by school giveaways
going on. You're about the winner of the Harley from
Lord Tigers. We told our boy Lionel from Sturges coming
up tomorrow. This deal got time to rest off our
gamekeepers LS Tractors give away Massy Oak Gamekeepers, LS Tratner
(35:34):
enter today. Look at it at the Big Show dot
com not advise the tequila park. I was talking to
the bump music. Oh some reason, I already.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Closed my browser.
Speaker 4 (35:49):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Yeah, I'll say, y'all are busy.
Speaker 8 (35:51):
I got it?
Speaker 5 (35:52):
Okay, what you got tighter?
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Well, I just you're looking at it.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
No, I just wanted you must be in the tequila
because lock Ackers Long Tiger's come up late.
Speaker 10 (36:01):
We're gonna He's been calling us like twenty five minutes
twenty minutes or so today. Yeah, okay, all right, good yeah,
that's what I was kind of waving about.
Speaker 5 (36:11):
I was like, whoa he so.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
Yeah, So we found out twenty five minutes, hi god,
because Sturgis is going on.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
So in that case, it's okay, perfect, all right, finds up,
get us around, all right, Well, let's keep on here
long Tigers in minutes, right, I'll have what he's having.
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Big shows on the radio coming up, we play Beating
the Blonde. But before we play for a prize pack,
let's talk about another big show prize.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
You ain't gonna believe. Proud sponsoring the Big Show.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Law Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing injured riders for
over two decades.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
With Law Tigers, you never ride alone. Maybe gonna hit Sturgis.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
It's the arts tomorrow and we got the Mayor of
Sturgis from Lode Tigers joining us right now. Our boy, Lionel,
Good morning, Lionel, Good morning, and why again?
Speaker 8 (37:11):
For four years now? Why aren't you here with me?
Speaker 1 (37:14):
Some of us gotta work?
Speaker 8 (37:16):
Do I have to hold to get you here?
Speaker 2 (37:18):
At the rally?
Speaker 1 (37:20):
Start with Randy it's my I wouldn't let him I
wouldn't let him off work.
Speaker 8 (37:28):
Randy, you and I are gonna have to have some word,
but I'll tell you, guys, you were right. It starts tomorrow.
The thunders here. I actually just snuck in. I'm in
the actually the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum talking to you right
now because it's still so loud out there. And I'm
standing here looking at a custom motorcycle. And it got
me a thinking, when the Big Show won't come to Sturgis,
(37:48):
let's do something special just for the big show listeners.
What do you guys think?
Speaker 7 (37:53):
I like it so far?
Speaker 1 (37:54):
Line, would you?
Speaker 8 (37:56):
Here's what I want to do. I'm looking at a
motorcycle here built by a guy named Rick Bray.
Speaker 7 (38:01):
Now.
Speaker 8 (38:01):
Rick Bray is a builder at a Fresno, California. His
shop is called RKB Custom Speed. I just talked to Rick,
and I want to do a big show motorcycle. Rick
is guaranteed he is gonna build us a big show
custom motorcycle. And I think we should give this away
to a listener.
Speaker 4 (38:21):
Wow, So, buddy, I mean, I can't get two boys
to come ride motorcycles, But may I give a bike
to somebody and they'll come ride with me.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Wow, man, So a special custom made big Show bike.
Speaker 8 (38:37):
Let's do a ground build. Let's go from the ground up.
Rick is a wizard, he's a dear friend of mine.
He's committed to it. He's gonna build us a full motorcycle.
And I think we make it exclusive. Let's just call
it the Big Show Bike, and let's give it away
and make someone's day.
Speaker 5 (38:53):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Man, A lot of that is so awesome. Man, that
is great.
Speaker 8 (38:57):
Yeah, all right, So there's no better way to start
the Sturgeons Rally. What do you say?
Speaker 7 (39:02):
No kidding?
Speaker 1 (39:04):
So how do you want to do it?
Speaker 2 (39:06):
You want to keep it like through Sturges and you know,
please don't let him be involved and figuring out how
to do it.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
Maybe I'll let you all work out.
Speaker 8 (39:17):
Let's kick it off. Let's kick it off tomorrow. How's that?
Kick it off tomorrow? Because that's the start of the rally, right,
so August fits away you're hearing at first, and right now,
I'll tell the team to quickly put a landing page
a website together, and we'll send every listener there to
enter to win. That way is completely fair, it's legit,
and we hook everybody up and I think this just
(39:38):
needs to be the Big Show Bike.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Big Show Bike, Big Showbike.
Speaker 8 (39:44):
Dot Com for your chance to win the world only
John Boy and Billy Big Show Bike built by r
KB Custom speed Man.
Speaker 1 (39:53):
Well, whatever you got on, Rick Bray, keep it until
we get this bike.
Speaker 8 (40:00):
Pictures. I'll tell you it's a couple of pictures that
he doesn't want to get let out.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
All right, Yeah, what happens in Sturgis stays in Sturgions,
I guess. Oh, wait, go ahead and pull it back
up since you're there, unless it's funny, and then.
Speaker 15 (40:15):
All right, Lionel, well I are there it is, buddy,
Thank you so much. What great news that we already
gave away the log Tigers and the trip to Sturgis
and now the Big Show Bike.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
All right, kick it off tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Awesomebody, we'll let you know tomorrow how to get your
name in the head for that Big Show Bike. Alright, then,
well let's play for that Fishing Cycles talking about high
quality electric bicycles of affordable prices and you can win
your own Fishing FM seven fifty x all terrain e bike.
Click on the link of the Big Show dot Com.
(40:48):
Make sure you got your name in the hat hang all,
Let's play for it right now.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
It's time.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
We'll beat the Blonde one eight hundred, big show. You
told Free Line we'd play next
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
You got the Big Joe on the radio. More chances
for you the wind coming up.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
After your news weathers mart Yeah, this is your old pals,
you stein La Black when I'm not mooching some of
that fine Jacques Danielle Whiskey and I play the right
fine gumbo off my best friend Woodrow Boodrow and that
sassy sack of wife and his on Lizbeth.
Speaker 4 (00:23):
I'm listening to those tool wacky Cajun John Boy and
Philly right down on that there.
Speaker 5 (00:28):
Big show Woe. There's funny I Gary on Pete.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
Go can do the new up and Adam. Welcome to Thursday,
first day August. Everybody doing good hair.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
We cracked over a brand new monthains twenty twenty four year.
Alright then please National Raspberry Cream Pie Day. Now we
had raspberry something yesterday. I think we had a couple
of Raspberry days in the road. Must be very popular.
Uh so, I got that's big Raspberry throwing their money.
(01:40):
National Girlfriends Day, Oh girlfriend, Hey, we encourage y'all girls
across the US to get together and celebrate your special
bond of friendship.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Just don't do enough.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
National ip A Day. That's a beer known as India
pale A. Okay, wow, India pail hell got their own day.
Speaker 5 (02:04):
Yeah, that's the Indian pel hel beegle.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
You're supposed to check it out then tick RPA National
Respect for Parents' Day. Well, shouldn't that be every day?
But house, I tell her or El Yeah, the love
you parents, of the workout for you. All right, three
(02:27):
days and this are saved up. We got our categories
and get that win and begin and let's see what
we're gonna win to beg Joe's on the radio. Good morning,
Big Shows on the radio. Let's get that first prize
pack out here. Let me see if I can find
it there.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
It is right there.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
It is a hat, t shirt, tumbler and a twenty
five dollars gas card from Law Tigers. Law Tigers motorcycle
lawyers who ride we on talk their boy Loneald the
mayor of Sturgis.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
That big deal is going on. We're going on. I
think we're gonna get.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Up with Lionel tomorrow. Lod Tigers cause they go on
to banner. When you go to the Big Show dot com,
check them out, listen number right now and win it.
It was nineteen o three Calamity Jane died at fifty
one years old.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
She was what was it, Captain Palmonter's girlfriend on f Troop?
Speaker 5 (03:28):
Okay, I.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
Never watched that show. What seventy year old show you see?
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Ain't had a wild girlfriend named Jane. I think her
character might have been based on Calamity Jane.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Wasn't she an?
Speaker 5 (03:43):
Was it Deadwood or one of those shows?
Speaker 6 (03:46):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
I don't know if that was Calamity Jane.
Speaker 7 (03:49):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
You're gonna have to look it up.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
I don't know, baby.
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Anyway, History lists her as a hero, frontiers man, marksman,
dance hall girl, Indian fighter, and adventurer Wow fifty one
Calamity Jane ninety seventy one The King Richard Petty became
the first stock car driver to win a million dollars
(04:14):
Matter the King in seventy one Past the Mill Wow. Then, finally,
on this date in ninety five, British newspapers announced that
London residents can now purchase lawn and garden insurance against
damaged by mole, squirrels and rabbits.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
The new policy would cost twenty.
Speaker 5 (04:30):
Eight bucks a year.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
A genius little webbit problem beudy Well, there you go.
There's our categories.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
One eight hundred Big Shows you told free line, come on,
play out birds next.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio for your.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Thursday, August first. Today's feature track from the Big Show,
Big Box Story Time when Carl Childers the Lonely Ranger,
the search forgi word Lonely in the Big Box Hat
the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 6 (05:24):
Tear right out, Win Upburst. Let's be Upburst. It's the
game that anyone can win. John Boy and Billy give
the puzzes from the Big Prize.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Be let's go he contested number one.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
This should really be a lot of fun when you're
playing Upburst.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Have a hurry up and guest time.
Speaker 6 (05:50):
But you love the best time.
Speaker 1 (05:52):
You love a big shots.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Let's say head a norset from New Freeport and.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Good morning Dorsey, Good morning, Hey, welcome in here.
Speaker 7 (06:13):
Boy.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Let's get you on these categories and get you the
big Old Los Tigers prizpect.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
That's my playing you in Yeah, I mean, all right,
there we go in.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
The honor of old Calamity. Give us three famous Jane's
ready to go.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
On the Calamity Jane and Jane Seymour.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
All right, don't you all.
Speaker 2 (06:37):
Met Jane Seymour out Cato far a couple of years ago, Danny, Yeah,
she still looks.
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Good when you get rid of Boner. How long ago
was that a couple of years?
Speaker 7 (06:48):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Let's say, uh darn Dorsey, here we go, buddy. Five seconds.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Give us three nassy car drivers pastor President Goop Eddy,
Daryl Arnhart Sr.
Speaker 8 (06:59):
Darryl aren't Hart you look.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
At you when they weren't hards and there and for
the wind door seed three things you can ensure ready to.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Go our house and move well, Bam, bam bam. We'll
get your low tiger's price back up the new freeport, Dorsey,
glad you wont body first time caller, Good work with it.
(07:32):
Why does jump out cut you up on?
Speaker 7 (07:34):
You knew.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
What went around you overnight?
Speaker 1 (07:39):
Too many words, never bought.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Yeah, how you folks?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Leonard lou Well in tonight Leonard Well and you're Lipless's cousin.
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Yeah, I reckon, I gotta let climb to it. All right?
Speaker 1 (08:39):
So how you doing this more?
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (08:41):
Hell, I'm all right?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
Did you get some breakfast? So are you still eating?
Speaker 5 (08:49):
No, I always kind of like you. Okay, I'm am afflicted.
Speaker 9 (08:53):
You know.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
I was born with a tip on my tongue. I
tracked to the roof of my mia.
Speaker 4 (08:59):
Wow, I've never heard of that before. Oh yeah, whole
dang family got mouth prawl his lip, don't touch Uncle
Claul got to jaw looked like a pair of dispenser
America bulldog because of Emmeline got the lizard tongue like
(09:20):
old jeans shimmer he steely ice cream off your cone
if you don't wash. And my brother Bart he got
two rolls of teeth top and bottom. I get shark
in jaw. That makes for one dang ugly family. Where
so the timber your tongue attaching the roof of your
(09:41):
mouth up, Yes, that sounds kind of awful.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
Oh hell, it sounds like something that would be easy
enough to have fixed.
Speaker 4 (09:51):
Well, you know what I thought about it. You know,
I wrote a letter from the v A hospital. I
ain't sent it yet, though, Why up, can't.
Speaker 6 (10:01):
Let that that?
Speaker 5 (10:02):
Come on?
Speaker 1 (10:03):
What have you seen the doctor at all?
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Yeah? I went once, had to cut your visit short, you.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
Know how come Well, when he told me to check
out my tongue and say, oh, I figured that he's
making spoiling.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Isn't it uncomfortable?
Speaker 10 (10:21):
No?
Speaker 7 (10:22):
Not really.
Speaker 5 (10:23):
You know there's stuff I can't do.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
Of course.
Speaker 5 (10:26):
It's kind of hard on the grand kids.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
You know, well, how is it hard on the grandkids?
Speaker 5 (10:31):
Well, you know youngins or plumb crazy about them farting noise.
I can't do that. I'll showed you. Look see what
I mean. You can't do it right right after the
tongue in.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
There show that's a pretty pitiful allah.
Speaker 5 (10:46):
Yeah, they're kind of the put out by it too.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
That must break your heart.
Speaker 5 (10:50):
Oh hell, I'm on.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
If nothing else, he kind of kind of sounds like
to be inconvenient.
Speaker 6 (10:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
Yeah, it's a burden on my fella. That's lots of
stuff you can't do, you know, like you can't stick
your tongue out of folks. You gotta just rely on
flipping them the murdens. I ain't never had an ice
cream cone, I can remember.
Speaker 5 (11:15):
Kind of put your.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
Car boss on a fellaw's love life too, you know.
I guess after all, you can't get the ladies listen.
Speaker 5 (11:22):
You can whistle at them, say what she means.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
So if you're not making time with the ladies. You
must becoming low. Oh hell, im truth be told. I've
been married about thirty years.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Really, what's your wife like?
Speaker 5 (11:38):
Everything but me far I can tell.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
I'm sure she loves you.
Speaker 5 (11:46):
You know what she can give me for Christmas this year?
Speaker 4 (11:48):
I can't imagine a book of daggum tongue questions like
Lipper says.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Why do you drink about life that wasn't very nice?
Did it hurt your feeling?
Speaker 11 (11:58):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (11:59):
Hell, iimy wells and I got to go out there.
I don't think I got the food bugger coming on.
The old lady wants to take me home and take
my temperature. That's just I can't hold that for momy
running my tongue.
Speaker 5 (12:13):
You getting the PreCure.
Speaker 4 (12:15):
Poor god, he.
Speaker 5 (12:19):
Get a cup of coffee.
Speaker 7 (12:20):
On the way out.
Speaker 5 (12:21):
I'm gonna.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Chun boy and Billy.
Speaker 5 (12:25):
Exactly my point, my ball cap, young friend.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Good morning radio, dumb right, good morning, and this will
(12:59):
be Joe hold the radio all right, way God, here
we go.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
It's time for the grumpy old man.
Speaker 12 (13:10):
Ah flibbity flu. I'm old and I hate fake boots.
In my day, we didn't need no silly cone stuffed blouse,
button busting, sweater stretching inflatable gravity to fire an injection,
molded billy goat, haunting man magnets. We were happy with
(13:33):
the way God Almighty made us. If you had a
huge set of lugwats, good for you, and if you
were a woman, even better. In my day, the only
fake hooters we needed were the wooden owls on the
bond to keep the crows away, and the only man
made jugs we wanted to get our hands on was.
Speaker 5 (13:55):
Holding on moonshine fake boots.
Speaker 12 (14:00):
When I was a boy, we liked them all natural,
baby swing, low sweet chariots. But not everyone was stuffed
like Lulu Roman from he Haw. Some girls got passed
over by the fun bak fairy like old plywood Paddy
Myrtle Bank. She was flatter than a plate of cold pea.
(14:24):
From the neck up, she was Hollywood starlet pretty. From
the neck down, she was like the before picture on
the Charles Atlas hands. She made Don Notch look like
Jane Mansfield. Her cup size was just like her grade
point average sea mines, and the only time a boy
would climb on her was in the winter when they
(14:47):
used her as a toboggan and the girls, the girls,
all the girls at school made horrible sport of her,
but she had.
Speaker 1 (14:55):
The last laugh.
Speaker 12 (14:57):
The day of the big fire and the school's gym,
the only way out was through a tiny little window
plywood Teddy shot through the opening like a monkey spitting
a watermelon. Scene with all them top heavy homeroom honeys
didn't stand a chance, and the fire bird for three
days because of all that boob fatnt. The coroner rooined
(15:18):
death by d cup and nobody ate the barbecue chicken
breast in a cafeteria for three months because someone found
a nipple on it.
Speaker 5 (15:26):
Don't ruin your appetite.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
We're having Bobby Cutie for lunch.
Speaker 12 (15:30):
All hailed this age of superficiality, and we like it.
Speaker 5 (15:35):
We loved it. Fake boobs.
Speaker 6 (15:39):
Bah.
Speaker 12 (15:41):
They're all the same. Some are big, some are bigger,
some are downright unwieldy.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
But they're all the same, and they got no gift
to them.
Speaker 7 (15:50):
Dan nam It.
Speaker 12 (15:51):
It's like letting onto a traffic cone. I can't work
with that. I got the arthritis, and when I do
the stop short, I want to grab something grabbable, not get.
Speaker 5 (16:04):
A fistful of a bulletproof vest.
Speaker 12 (16:08):
Real boobs are all different, like snowflakes, dirty sexy snowflakes.
And if you want to talk about different, I'll tell
you about old frieda flap jack bucklewinner. What a sight
downright huge, And by that I mean they were huge
and hung down into the right and the older she got,
(16:30):
the more down they got, like a pair of dimply
old wind socks on a calm day. And then she
turned eighteen who and it was downhill the whole way.
They bought her from going to square dancers because when
someone would spin your partner, her log flap and breastacles
(16:50):
would pop out, and she.
Speaker 5 (16:51):
Cleared the room like a three stoochi short. Did she care?
Speaker 1 (16:54):
Hell no, She could have had.
Speaker 12 (16:57):
Him surgically altery did, but she she loved him, and
so did any red blooded mail jibbledy doody.
Speaker 9 (17:06):
Do look at me.
Speaker 5 (17:08):
I'm in in Bret Moron, not toothless by a pair of.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Backwards and a candas call the preacher. I'm in love
with stretch boobstraw.
Speaker 5 (17:18):
And we liked it, We loved it.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
Seek good morning, you got the big show on the radio.
More chances you to win coming up after your news
weathers Barts. I stand on the hill, but not for
a thrill, for the breath of a fresh keel. And
never mind the man who contemplates doing away with license plates.
(17:46):
He stands alone anyhow, Bacon.
Speaker 13 (17:49):
The cookies of discontent by the heat of the longer
man fam leaving their sword and then like in petrygo
dot dot dot, you know, kind of host set up.
Speaker 9 (18:03):
Leaving that soul hot in the waters of the Medulla
Oblonga with John Boy and Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (18:13):
You like that with John Boy, Good Morning.
Speaker 2 (18:54):
That's a big shon the radio for your Thursday August First,
you're having a birthday today.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Happy birthday.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
You're sharing one with the god that I My former
University of North Carolina basketball coach, Roy william coach. Roy
is seventy four years old today. I'm not gonna name her,
but the girl at the beach makes great chicken salad
famenta cheese, okay, And she would leave chicken salad on
(19:25):
Roy Williams porch.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
As as a gift as a gift okay, okay, right,
like in a paper bag that was on fire. Yeah,
as you would like, you know, to watch him come out.
You know and get it. Oh so she was wait
after she was not so he would notice.
Speaker 14 (19:48):
Oh well, I guess it's kind of like a chicken
salad stalker. Yeah, that would definitely classify as a stalker.
But I mean he ate the chicken salad and really
liked it.
Speaker 5 (20:00):
And he didn't know who who broke that.
Speaker 4 (20:02):
There Another time she was coming and was a twenty
dollars bill under one departed plants, and she.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Just thought that's for me probably or or the famer boy.
Speaker 5 (20:16):
I'm not sure, but I'm here and it's here, so it's.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
Fine a boy till he paid me for this. I
never looked at it like that the other way she
told it was for so I.
Speaker 7 (20:28):
All right.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Happy birthday, Roy, try to perment a cheese.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio, John Boys Wonderful
Thing Giveaway number one hundred and twelve. See the frame
photo of me with rock legend Grace Slick from Jefferson Airplane.
Let's celebrate.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
And now here's Grace Slick for Flintstone vitamins.
Speaker 10 (20:56):
One looks like bunny and one.
Speaker 4 (21:01):
Pill shaped like bread.
Speaker 10 (21:04):
Hi, boys and girls, I'm Gracie Slick.
Speaker 13 (21:06):
You know.
Speaker 10 (21:07):
When I was on the road with Jefferson Airplane. In
the sixties, I chased a lot of white rabbits, and
I usually chase them with Scotch Hey, but I don't
get high anymore now. I like to get flint stoned.
I just drop a couple of Vennies or Dinos before
a concert, and soon I'm getting a buzz on vitamins
and minerals, just like that modern Stone age family down
(21:29):
the street. Now, when the white knight is talking backwards,
I know my turntable's probably just in reverse. So when
the men on the chessboard get up and tell you
where to go, tell him you're going for some Flintstone vitamins.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
And all right, Grace still coming in handy in a
(22:07):
couple of ways.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Here on the Big Show, let's play John Boydjevity, y'all
need to review yesterday's question. We found out to take
seven days in an oven to make one of these,
at least for the white ones. Other solid colors take
a little longer, and the striped ones take fifteen days.
Speaker 1 (22:23):
The billiard balls.
Speaker 8 (22:25):
Was what that was?
Speaker 2 (22:26):
You thought it was a stork when we were mixing
up our jeopardies to babies storks of I'm sorry that's funny.
I just need to work shop. Well, you just okay,
Today's John Boyjeparty. On the average, this household appliance spends
about three hours a week in the own position.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
What is the washing machine on?
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Spin cycle? Washing machine?
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Wow?
Speaker 5 (22:52):
Why are you looking at me?
Speaker 1 (22:54):
Do you really know?
Speaker 6 (22:57):
You know?
Speaker 11 (22:57):
You know?
Speaker 5 (22:58):
I'll just say that.
Speaker 2 (22:58):
Okay, that's got I'm a good guess. Actually, now that
I'll think about all what you all got to bet?
It was not correct one eight hundred Big Show. No,
it's good it wasn't correct because they would have to
do another question.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Don't come out. I'm getting my own nerves again. You
are doing a great shut up. One ain't under Big Show?
You told free Lon. We go to we get the winner.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
We play John Boy Jeopardy next. Good morning, this is
(23:45):
a big show on the radio. We're on it to
you Thursday. Today's feature track from The Big Show, Big
Box story Time with Carl Childers the Lonely Ranger. You
were lonely hit the Big Box at the Big Show
dot comy Right now, let's play Yes live across America.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
It's John Boy Japanese and now your host.
Speaker 14 (24:07):
He says, if there's something getting turned on in his
house about three hours a week.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
That's a really good week. He's John Boy.
Speaker 5 (24:17):
Thank heavy.
Speaker 2 (24:20):
Le's headed Jesse out of Rogersville, Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Good morning, Jesse, Hello boy, Hey budd, we're all good.
Welcome in here.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Jesse got the first shot at John Boy Jeopardy. On
the average, this household applying spends about three hours a
week in the on position.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
You got, Jesse, boy, I'm gonna yeah, I'm gonna play.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Iron going with an iron? Lesay, is it an iron?
Speaker 6 (24:51):
Yes?
Speaker 9 (24:52):
Look at Jesse.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
All right, Buddy, good work.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
You've got the big old prize package of those mount
Olive pickles. I got a cool hat, the T shirt,
three pack of pickle juicers, and I want to celebrate
Mount Olive, proud partner of the National Wheelchair Basketball Association.
Men's and women's teams will go for the gold next
month of the Paralympic Games in Paris. Go Team USA
(25:21):
and go just in Tennessee.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Buddy, congratulations, Thank you, John Boy.
Speaker 8 (25:26):
Heylusen.
Speaker 10 (25:26):
I'm I'm a first time caller.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
All right, then.
Speaker 8 (25:31):
Do you care if I give a shout out?
Speaker 7 (25:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
I'd love for you too.
Speaker 7 (25:35):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:35):
I just want to give a shout out to my
lovely kids and my beautiful wife.
Speaker 4 (25:40):
I don't know how how she's put up with me
for so long that I want to give them a
shout out.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Well, right, Jesse, I appreciate you and your family. Listen
to the Big Show bottom of the hour, top of
your news. Oh right, special Mad Mike's on this Thursday morning, right.
Speaker 7 (26:03):
On the out of side.
Speaker 1 (26:39):
Good morning, it's a big show.
Speaker 5 (26:41):
On the radio.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Read it got this call, Good morning, Big shown.
Speaker 7 (26:47):
Y'all bore many, y'all, alad make fact, how's it going?
Take a while? I guess you're mad, mad, I'm plumpiculated.
In fact, I don't even want to talk about it.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
Well, if you don't want to talk about it, alright, if.
Speaker 7 (27:00):
You're gonna drag it out of me, boys, The climate
change crowd has discovered another urgent threat to the survival
of planet Earth big screen TVs. I kid you not
says here. Nitrogen tryphoura out of gas used in the
manufacture of flat screen TV monitors is being blamed for
(27:24):
damaging the atmosphere and accelerating the process of global warming.
The gas is estimated to be getting this seventeen thousand
times as powerful as carbon the oxide. That's right, seventeen
thousand times. Please, if they don't make up a number,
(27:44):
why don't they just say a bajillion and get done
with it, My budd, I tell you boys, between the
health Nazis and the climate nuts, I'm starting to feel
kind of picked on lately. Oh, don't put all that
salt on your food. Oh your on to drive that
big old trump. Oh can't put three on in your
air conditioner no more? Oh you need to recycle your
(28:06):
plastic bottles. Oh, when life bubs ain't no good, you
need to get these new ones and cost two bucks
to pop. And now it's your TV said it is
killing the hose arm layer. Quit on, y'all. Just come
out against beer big knockers in a sports section of
the paper. While you're at it, Just the clear war
on everything. It makes my life worth living. I'll tell
(28:29):
you one thing right now, y'all ain't getting my big screen.
If what TV said it's cheap, big and got a
good picture, I don't care if it runs on platonium. Hey,
if you lift his scientists need a project to keep
you busy, how about coming up with something that'll run
my pickup. Trump don't cost five bunchs of gallon. That's
(28:50):
why I bought the dead gum big screen in the
first place. Gass so high can't afford to do nothing,
sit home and watch TV. So listen, a big head.
We got enough problems. What we need are some solutions.
Y'all ain't gonna do something positive to sitting down, shut
up and quit word in my life. God boy, Billy,
(29:13):
y'all have a nice day.
Speaker 5 (29:43):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
That's a big showing already you running through your Thursday,
first day of August. It's time for dumb crook news,
dumb cruk story sending by you and the big showd
listeners from all over the world dress will follow this.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
Report, which is entitled Florida Man, Chapter three.
Speaker 2 (30:07):
Two curious Fleigler County deputies turned their cruiser around after
seeing an older Florida man wearing nothing but a blue
speedo wave at him.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
As they drove by.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
As they approached a man, he told him he had
been smoking some wicked weed and they should try a bowl.
The debities declined, but asked where he had gotten it,
but a man then proudly led him to his backyard
where his pot plant was still growing.
Speaker 6 (30:35):
I did.
Speaker 2 (30:35):
A sixty five year old was arrested for possession and
cultivation of marijuana. When a Pensacola, Florida man showed up
in a local er with a gunshot wound to his
wrists and a bizarre explanation to go along with it,
hospital staff called the police. Man told the responding debities
he had decided to put down seven three month old
(30:57):
shepherd mixed puppies because he couldn't find homes for him.
He said, he loaded his handgun and began gathering up
the dogs in his arms with a gun in his
right hand.
Speaker 10 (31:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:08):
One of the puppies wiggled around and put its pall
on the trigger of the gun, fired it, wounding the
man's left wrist.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
Justice man was charged with animal cruelty. The puppies were
taken to a local animal shelter. All adopted. Want the
old puppy shoots Florida man.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
I named that one triggered.
Speaker 7 (31:29):
Hey.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
The Sodo County, Florida man stole the high end four
wheeler and ducked into a nearby gated community to hide.
Police received numerous calls about somebody riding through homeowners properties
on a red four wheeler. So when police arrived, the
man of the approach to homeowner and asked me could
use her electrical outlet to charge his ankle monitor. He
(31:51):
was arrested, adding grand theft although to his already long
list of offenses. A Crestview, Florida man was called on
neighborhoods security cameras committing a series of car and home burglaries.
On the footage, you can see him stealing a handgun
from one of the vehicles and stuffing a pistol into
the front of his pants.
Speaker 1 (32:09):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Short time later you've seen checking more cars, brazenally checking
if a lowerd garage door could be raised, But as
he'd bent over to try to lift it, the stolen
gun discharged, shooting him in the thigh. The loud gun
shot and subsequent screams of agony loaed the homeowner, who
called the police. Taken to an air by hospital trayment end,
(32:33):
then to a jail for booking, and finally a Daytona,
Florida man called nine to one one to report that
he and his girlfriend were trapped inside of a lot
closet on the campus of DAYTONA State college. Man said
they had gotten trapped inside the space two days earlier
while hiding from some men who had been chasing him. Well,
(32:56):
when police arrived, they found a couple inside of a
janitor's closet in the school's environmental science building, and after
freeing the pair, they made several interesting discoveries. One, there
was drug paraphernalia and evidence of drug use found inside
of the closet. Two, they were not students at the
facility and did not have permission to be on campus property. Three,
(33:21):
those men that were chasing them were campus security. And
best of all, the closet they were trapped inside of
had no lock. They had apparently spent two days trying
to push open the door that.
Speaker 1 (33:37):
Needed to be pulled. I told you that stuff for
makeel stupid.
Speaker 2 (33:44):
Didn't wan to do or charged with trespassing, evaiting police,
possession of drug paravenelia, and stupidity.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Yes, have you got dumb Crook News?
Speaker 2 (33:56):
Mail to Numb Crook News John Bynbelly and peelbox one nine,
Charlotte and C two eight two one nine Email anybody
from me at the Big Show dot com.
Speaker 1 (34:09):
Good morning, you got the Big Show on the radio.
More chance for you to win?
Speaker 5 (34:13):
Coming up? After your news, weather and sports.
Speaker 9 (34:16):
Mama.
Speaker 11 (34:18):
All I wanted to do was have a let us
sandwich on gluten bread, a tall glass of.
Speaker 5 (34:23):
Buttermilk, and crawl under a bearskin rug.
Speaker 11 (34:27):
Why do I have to listen to that John Boy
person and Billy whoever on that noisy big show button, Mama, Good.
Speaker 1 (35:09):
Morning, It's a big show on the radio right here, summertime.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Here we are August, the first step by school giveaways
going on. You're about the winner of the Harley from
Lord Tigers. We told our boy Lionel from Sturges coming
up tomorrow. This deal got time to rest off our
gamekeepers LS Tractors give away Massy Oak Gamekeepers, LS Tratner
(35:34):
enter today. Look at it at the Big Show dot
com not advise the tequila park. I was talking to
the bump music. Oh some reason, I already.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Closed my browser.
Speaker 4 (35:49):
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
Yeah, I'll say, y'all are busy.
Speaker 8 (35:51):
I got it?
Speaker 5 (35:52):
Okay, what you got tighter?
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Well, I just you're looking at it.
Speaker 3 (35:56):
No, I just wanted you must be in the tequila
because lock Ackers Long Tiger's come up late.
Speaker 10 (36:01):
We're gonna He's been calling us like twenty five minutes
twenty minutes or so today. Yeah, okay, all right, good yeah,
that's what I was kind of waving about.
Speaker 5 (36:11):
I was like, whoa he so.
Speaker 4 (36:13):
Yeah, So we found out twenty five minutes, hi god,
because Sturgis is going on.
Speaker 1 (36:18):
So in that case, it's okay, perfect, all right, finds up,
get us around, all right, Well, let's keep on here
long Tigers in minutes, right, I'll have what he's having.
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Big shows on the radio coming up, we play Beating
the Blonde. But before we play for a prize pack,
let's talk about another big show prize.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
You ain't gonna believe. Proud sponsoring the Big Show.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
Law Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing injured riders for
over two decades.
Speaker 1 (36:55):
With Law Tigers, you never ride alone. Maybe gonna hit Sturgis.
Speaker 2 (36:59):
It's the arts tomorrow and we got the Mayor of
Sturgis from Lode Tigers joining us right now. Our boy, Lionel,
Good morning, Lionel, Good morning, and why again?
Speaker 8 (37:11):
For four years now? Why aren't you here with me?
Speaker 1 (37:14):
Some of us gotta work?
Speaker 8 (37:16):
Do I have to hold to get you here?
Speaker 2 (37:18):
At the rally?
Speaker 1 (37:20):
Start with Randy it's my I wouldn't let him I
wouldn't let him off work.
Speaker 8 (37:28):
Randy, you and I are gonna have to have some word,
but I'll tell you, guys, you were right. It starts tomorrow.
The thunders here. I actually just snuck in. I'm in
the actually the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum talking to you right
now because it's still so loud out there. And I'm
standing here looking at a custom motorcycle. And it got
me a thinking, when the Big Show won't come to Sturgis,
(37:48):
let's do something special just for the big show listeners.
What do you guys think?
Speaker 7 (37:53):
I like it so far?
Speaker 1 (37:54):
Line, would you?
Speaker 8 (37:56):
Here's what I want to do. I'm looking at a
motorcycle here built by a guy named Rick Bray.
Speaker 7 (38:01):
Now.
Speaker 8 (38:01):
Rick Bray is a builder at a Fresno, California. His
shop is called RKB Custom Speed. I just talked to Rick,
and I want to do a big show motorcycle. Rick
is guaranteed he is gonna build us a big show
custom motorcycle. And I think we should give this away
to a listener.
Speaker 4 (38:21):
Wow, So, buddy, I mean, I can't get two boys
to come ride motorcycles, But may I give a bike
to somebody and they'll come ride with me.
Speaker 2 (38:31):
Wow, man, So a special custom made big Show bike.
Speaker 8 (38:37):
Let's do a ground build. Let's go from the ground up.
Rick is a wizard, he's a dear friend of mine.
He's committed to it. He's gonna build us a full motorcycle.
And I think we make it exclusive. Let's just call
it the Big Show Bike, and let's give it away
and make someone's day.
Speaker 5 (38:53):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
Man, A lot of that is so awesome. Man, that
is great.
Speaker 8 (38:57):
Yeah, all right, So there's no better way to start
the Sturgeons Rally. What do you say?
Speaker 7 (39:02):
No kidding?
Speaker 1 (39:04):
So how do you want to do it?
Speaker 2 (39:06):
You want to keep it like through Sturges and you know,
please don't let him be involved and figuring out how
to do it.
Speaker 1 (39:12):
Maybe I'll let you all work out.
Speaker 8 (39:17):
Let's kick it off. Let's kick it off tomorrow. How's that?
Kick it off tomorrow? Because that's the start of the rally, right,
so August fits away you're hearing at first, and right now,
I'll tell the team to quickly put a landing page
a website together, and we'll send every listener there to
enter to win. That way is completely fair, it's legit,
and we hook everybody up and I think this just
(39:38):
needs to be the Big Show Bike.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Big Show Bike, Big Showbike.
Speaker 8 (39:44):
Dot Com for your chance to win the world only
John Boy and Billy Big Show Bike built by r
KB Custom speed Man.
Speaker 1 (39:53):
Well, whatever you got on, Rick Bray, keep it until
we get this bike.
Speaker 8 (40:00):
Pictures. I'll tell you it's a couple of pictures that
he doesn't want to get let out.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
All right, Yeah, what happens in Sturgis stays in Sturgions,
I guess. Oh, wait, go ahead and pull it back
up since you're there, unless it's funny, and then.
Speaker 15 (40:15):
All right, Lionel, well I are there it is, buddy,
Thank you so much. What great news that we already
gave away the log Tigers and the trip to Sturgis
and now the Big Show Bike.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
All right, kick it off tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Awesomebody, we'll let you know tomorrow how to get your
name in the head for that Big Show Bike. Alright, then,
well let's play for that Fishing Cycles talking about high
quality electric bicycles of affordable prices and you can win
your own Fishing FM seven fifty x all terrain e bike.
Click on the link of the Big Show dot Com.
(40:48):
Make sure you got your name in the hat hang all,
Let's play for it right now.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
It's time.
Speaker 2 (40:53):
We'll beat the Blonde one eight hundred, big show. You
told Free Line we'd play next
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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