March 31, 2025 • 42 mins
Monday (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Oliver recaps the signs that John Boy is getting old.. - Bill Silvers has a list of new slogan suggestions for the DNC.. - John Boy & Jackie sing “Dooley”.. - REK swerves into your lane.. - John Boy gloats over where his high school crush is working these days.. - The Flip Flop Bandit gets a request.. - and the Mayor of Dismal Seepage is kicking off their Political Correctness Days this weekend!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Good morning. There's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Monday morning, last day of March, and our feature track
when the Big Show, Big Box Mayor and this one
see if it's political correctness days.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
There's a keywords political mayor.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
When you hear the bid box happen the Big Show
dot com.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
There right now, it's time to try and beat the blonde.
I'll just find out when to agree with the blog
usually we do.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
Let's meet our contestant, Rick out of Cucumber, West Virginia.
Good morning, Richard, Good morning, Hey buddy, there we ever
had anybody out of Cucumber?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
What what?
Speaker 4 (01:11):
What's your town named after? Come on, oh god, yes
it is named after a cucumber.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
You're all good. They're growing cucumbers. That something about the
soul of.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
Bear is good.
Speaker 6 (01:25):
I never seen one.
Speaker 7 (01:27):
You've never seen a cucumber.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Growing?
Speaker 8 (01:33):
Ok?
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Oh, Richard, We're glad you made it in here, buddy.
If you can figure Tighter out over here, she's seen
many you are.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Wow.
Speaker 7 (01:49):
This accidental stuff just falls.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Out where your head is. Sorry, there we go, Richard Tighter.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Christopher Columbus history first bra the seeds of something to
the Western world. Then they begin popping up in Florida,
then South America, and now they're all over California. What
were they the seeds of.
Speaker 9 (02:14):
The seeds of discontain. That would be grape seeds, sir.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Grape seeds. Grape seeds. You think that may be responsible
all the wonderful wine of the caliboy?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Does that what you're thinking?
Speaker 9 (02:29):
They make wine?
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You've never seen one, Richard, don't think too hard. Tater says, grapes.
Do you agree or disagree?
Speaker 6 (02:40):
I would agree?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Ah, yes, oranges oranges with the seeds, bro Yes they are.
That was kind of a toughie. Thank you grapes for
a word.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
If you don't know, maybe go wild, you know they say, oh.
Speaker 9 (02:58):
Wow, the seeds of discontainer.
Speaker 6 (03:03):
That was good.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Never mind, he did great, Okay, here we go.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
George Washington Carver was the man who was able to
do three hundred different things with.
Speaker 9 (03:16):
What Oh I noticed with a can of w D
forty you can do so much with that stuff.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
You are very right about it. I don't know if
that was around George Washington Carver.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think he was WD two.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
One.
Speaker 9 (03:34):
Maybe he need a bunch of stuff with cotton, did.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
A bunch of stuff with cotton? Over three hundred different things,
is what Taylor's saying, Richard, agree or disagreed?
Speaker 6 (03:45):
I agree?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Agreeing again with her.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
Huh, peanuts is what he did, three hundred different things
with peanuts.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
He was in all the paper. Well, Richard, we got
a consolation prize.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
It's the only game that we have consolation prizes for because,
as you see, we usually need them sometimes.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
You got it, buddy, appreciate you listening you and yours.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
I'm cucumber Jackie. Send him a cucumber.
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Bottom of the hore, top of your news left where
John Boys celebrations when y'all making fun of me about my.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Old girlfriend working at Hooters.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
All righty word, good morning.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
That's a big show on the radio for your Monday.
Mark's the Thursday. First look what I got Jackie gave us, Jamie,
John Boy Gwyn Motley, your very first girlfriend called and
she now works for Hooters and Gastonia. They are having
(05:36):
a swimsuit contest this Thursday, and I was hoping that
you would come down and judge it for her. So
is that makes to be all we need to know
about that story. I'll read you this pardon, she said,
(06:00):
that you were her first boyfriend. About ninety pounds, red
hair and freckles.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Yeah, three still had four years of high school eligibility.
Speaker 7 (06:23):
Yeah, this is before high school.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
This was like the sixth grade. I mean, she wasn't
my first girlfriend. She didn't know that girlfriends, that's kidding,
but she was the first, like real girlfriend. Were you
kiss you know? You know you all remember the first
one you kiss?
Speaker 10 (06:41):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (06:42):
I think you got on It's slinky.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yeah, I mean, gween, we we were pretty hot eyed
tom moving around sixth grade kissing.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
Well, that's how it ended, but that was later.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Let's say, y'all amused why women dig me these days?
I's ninety pounds, red hair and freckles. Got the hottest
girl in the sixth grade? Hello, she's mid working at Hooters.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
You want mild wings? Or to me, I ain't kind
of damning on my.
Speaker 9 (07:33):
Fin getting his red hair and everything.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Fish guesting you. I'm sorry, honey, was shutting a nunder
bucket of beer. Well, it certainly is a Motley crew
And today you tell me was dating a college girl back.
Speaker 11 (08:09):
I'm sorry, Glenn, And she says he used to be
ninety pounds and red hair, and freckles, and I is
to ninety.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
He's got back hair like Bigfoot, but still has ninety
pounds of red hair. She is working at Hooters in
gas Stone day All right.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Now easy, my mom works at Hooters and Gaston. Oh man,
there's my kissing memory and y'all right?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
So can I go Jack?
Speaker 7 (08:48):
No, f.
Speaker 12 (08:58):
If I used to kiss you. Mail to the Big Show, yod.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Morning, Big Shows on the radio. Worried about sizzle. We
got our agent. Let's see you. It's on the desk.
Speaker 10 (09:34):
Get red Hot Hello, Red Hot Tel't Incorporated, home of
the Hot Ones for forty four years. Ready to tickle
your eyes and your ears are actually the best the
top of the heat except Jimbo and Bobby, but they're
really cheating.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
I just missed best out. No, this is time on Bella.
Speaker 6 (09:52):
Here.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
How's our favorite girl the whole wide world?
Speaker 6 (09:55):
Unless I hurt you so married to kid rocks you.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
I'm glad to hear it is Murray round.
Speaker 10 (10:03):
No, he's kind of oblong with a wap head. Sorry,
there's this idiot that used to call here and say
that all the time.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
Yeah, I know that was me.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
I rest my kids.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That's a good you put murray on sure.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
Hold on, hey my, what a great looking tie. You
know you could never tell you're wearing a.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Hairpye put him on the telephone.
Speaker 6 (10:27):
Oh okay, sure, hey my, jump on Bobby on two?
Speaker 10 (10:32):
No, really, hello, jump out? I love you mean it?
Hey man, I was looking for you guys at the
race over the weekend.
Speaker 6 (10:41):
You went to the race, that's right.
Speaker 10 (10:43):
While you and Maiderman went down in the infield, eating
chili and lighting poots, I was up on the sweet level,
closing a pair of big money deals with Roy McKee,
the president of Royco International Petroleum Corporation.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
Wow, so some products.
Speaker 10 (11:01):
Mega Shine three thousand, the world's finest once a year
car polish mechan Note, Babe, Thursday afternoon, two o'clock, we're
shooting a TV commercial.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
I go Thursday three o'clock. When do we get to
see the script?
Speaker 6 (11:17):
Oh?
Speaker 10 (11:17):
I don't think you'll need to see the script.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
You mean we're going to wig it?
Speaker 10 (11:20):
Well, actually you're not really in the commercial. I just
rented them your truck for the afternoon.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
My truck.
Speaker 6 (11:27):
It should be really.
Speaker 10 (11:27):
Clean when you get it back. And they said they're
going to shine up and run it through a car wash.
Fifty two times.
Speaker 6 (11:32):
Verry, Oh, don't.
Speaker 10 (11:33):
Worry, Roy says, Mega Shine three thousand is the best.
Oh and Friday afternoon, we're shooting a spot for Megalube
three thousand. It's a motor oil additive.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
All right, now, am I in that one?
Speaker 6 (11:46):
No?
Speaker 10 (11:47):
I sauld, that's just your truck again. They're gonna crank
it up, drin out all the oil and let it
run for fifteen minutes. We again, Megalube is an excellent product.
I really require it.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
Where are you supposed to get my face on TV?
Not my truck?
Speaker 10 (12:00):
Well, no offense, babe, Your truck has been a little
bit better maintain. So are you in?
Speaker 2 (12:06):
I guess so about the best we're gonna get out
of an agent like you.
Speaker 10 (12:09):
Excuse me, Jimbo, Please, are you suggesting I'm just using
you to close a deal, that I don't really care
about the longtime health of your career, that I'm just
taking the path of least resistance to an easy buck?
Is that how you think it is?
Speaker 1 (12:24):
You mean, that's not how it is, of course not.
Speaker 10 (12:27):
It's just that I mean you and went Ryan, Okay, yeah,
that pretty much is how it is, all right, But
look on the bright Side fifty two free cardes.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Oh good, but better work.
Speaker 10 (12:39):
Trust me, babe. Hey listen, we'll talk it over. We'll
super lunch thing later. Have your machine called my machine?
All right? Now, I gotta make like a banana.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
You mean you're gonna split?
Speaker 10 (12:47):
Now I'm gonna dive into a bowl of corn flakes.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
A sorry, babe.
Speaker 10 (12:53):
There was this idiot that used to call here and
say that all the time. Hey, listen, let's do the
lunch thing. Have you a machine call my machine? And Jimbo,
what did you ever know that you're my hero and
everything I would like to be. I can fly higher
than an eagle because you are the wind beneath my
sheet wings. You are the wings beneath my sheet.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
No, you're the wind beneath my wings.
Speaker 10 (13:18):
Well, thanks baby, and not so bad you. Oh and
give my little Bobby. That's Billy him too, and jib
O what call me?
Speaker 1 (13:27):
Good morning?
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Big Show's on the radio, more big show right around
the corner.
Speaker 8 (13:32):
I'm working with mister mill Cox over his outfit. And
I like to listen to John Boy and Billy and
they're big Yo. I like the way they talk.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
They're a funny ha ha not funny queers.
Speaker 8 (13:47):
That's what they say. Anyhow, I've figured out what John
Boy had a hard time getting started in the morning.
I ain't gotten the gage.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Good morning. It's a big show on the radio. Quicker
mind about the John.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Bone Billy Late Risers podcast every Monday through Friday. After
we wrap up the broadcast. You know where going at
get you ready of a podcast. But wherever you get
your podcast, you can make it easy. Subscribe to us
with a free iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 6 (14:48):
Do that.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Earlier this morning, needed the b higgle Oliver coming in
talking about me being old Jackie is singing do then
swerving mol Hooter's girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Y'all thought that was funny, didn't. I still think it's funny.
I guess that's what it is.
Speaker 9 (15:11):
You're soup soup arrogan about it.
Speaker 10 (15:14):
It is.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
For so smug.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
Yeah, it's about the city.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
I guess over, but that's what we're talking about. John
Boy billing Late Risers podcast later this Monday morning.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
Wordy Words, song and wordy Word all coming up right quick.
John Boy's Wonderful Thing Number one hundred and thirty seven
is a copy of the new book The Whole Truth
about Spring Turkey Hunting according to ronic Couz Strickland from
Marsey Oak autographed by Grand Slam holder John Boy.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
That will make it personalized. Whoever we draw.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
For the winner this Friday gets your naming the hat
the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 9 (15:53):
Another random wings.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
Yeah yeah, I got a big show on the radio.
We got a wordy word song here, getting ready to
queue up? Get you ready to play? The winner gets
an assortment of swag from World Lawn. Moores makers are
the best value zero turn moores on the market. They
feature a three year unlimited hours warning, Kawihaki engines, and
(16:18):
heavy duty steal decks. Mowodo Landscaping's best kept secret. World
Lawn find their link to The Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Right now, let's do it all.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
Look at here?
Speaker 11 (16:33):
Who's that calling the studio line? Why it's almost wordy
word time? Hey, they want to play wordy Word. It's
easier than you heard. You got the skills it takes
to win this game. Listen to me, it's only little
(16:57):
wordy word. Don't be such a chicken turn.
Speaker 13 (17:03):
If you back out now, your friends will think to
your lame.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Why a big brain you have?
Speaker 13 (17:15):
You're gonna win and make up bad to ensure you
have a real good time.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
I'll make sure you get some words that rhyme.
Speaker 13 (17:28):
What a big score you half your opponent will show beside.
So till you hear that winning us spelled, you'll short
enough better to ride like hell. So keep that thinking
cap on or your chance as well. Soon big gone.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
And you'll be sitting in loser bill.
Speaker 11 (17:53):
All alone. You can win and wordy word. You don't
have to be a nerd.
Speaker 7 (18:05):
But if you.
Speaker 13 (18:06):
Wind the older renness team, then you won't.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
John sixty seconds. You have to earn that victory.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
Laugh.
Speaker 13 (18:22):
If you can't beat the clock, you'll be a laughing stock.
Then the ridicule never rest from your family and your friends.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
What a food you'll be? Your matter stick with taking sea.
Speaker 11 (18:46):
So come on, play wordy word, give lady luck the bird.
Speaker 13 (18:53):
You're either gonna win this thing or you won't.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Who you won't? You ain't gonna win no way?
Speaker 6 (19:09):
What you mind?
Speaker 2 (19:11):
Not?
Speaker 10 (19:18):
All right?
Speaker 4 (19:19):
We're ready for worthy word now huh h may run
the hooters girls off.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
A come on, let's get h okay, that's what.
Speaker 4 (19:32):
One ain't er big show you don't free line. We'll
get a couple of contestans and play next good morning,
(20:02):
make shows on the radio.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Running to you Monday, March Thur the first mayor disimal
sever its my feature track today end up in Merlin
here and up be requested bit in the morning, in
minutes and right now, let's play.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
I went to everybody's head about the bed the third
word worthy. Let's meet the contestants.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
We got Carlton from Rural Hill, North Carolina. Good morning, Carlton,
John Boy, Welcome Bonnie. See who you playing? You got
TJ out of Greenwood, South Carolina. Good morning, TJ.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
Hello, John Boy the show.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Hello, all right, TJ. How about TJ and Taylor? T TJ? Okay,
they're mind the letters, but yeah, I don't work, and
me and Carlton we'll go as well, so uh TJ.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
Carlton, Welcome boys, South Carolina versus North two rounds.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
See what we can do. Let's show him on his
Graham high schooled. Well, try not to shove off TJ.
You relax, all right, Carlton? Are you ready?
Speaker 4 (21:12):
We got a theme this morning, by the way, things
in a grocery store, things you would find in a
grocery store.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
All right, you ready at Carlton, Yes, sir, all right,
start the clock.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Now, this comes from a cow and you drink it milk.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Uh huh.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Johnny planted seeds for these kind of trees, apple trees.
Speaker 5 (21:36):
Uh huh uh.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
The opposite of ketchup is the yellow uh huh uh.
Speaker 4 (21:42):
This is what you get out of a dairy product
that you churn.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Yeah, what kind of cheese is No, it's just cheese.
It's the orange kind, sharp one sharp sharp, yes, that's it.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
All right, okay, all right, man and I couldn't figure
out a way to get the chatter cheese like that,
but you did a good job, Caughton.
Speaker 1 (22:04):
So uh four on the board.
Speaker 4 (22:06):
All right, Well, let's see what TJ and Tatter's got
from their round one.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
You ready, TJ?
Speaker 6 (22:12):
I'm ready?
Speaker 9 (22:12):
John Boyle, alright, and go pick up some spuds.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
What are you gonna buy potatoes? Huh?
Speaker 9 (22:20):
This, Jeff is some peter Pan is the you You
might need some sauce and these kind of noodles.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
To make what spaghetti you uh in the morning.
Speaker 9 (22:32):
Quaker makes this kind of stuff. It's mushy, but the
whole word, the whole word egg. These are green vegetables.
They come in a pod.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Dolphin slipper.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
All right, that was a five on the board, tapping
the lead by one. All right, and I'll call me
and you for round two. Let's see what we can do.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Are you ready? Yes, sir?
Speaker 6 (23:04):
All right?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Starting to clock now, chickens lay these?
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Hey, you put this white stuff to make it sweet
in your coffee, sugar check your blank in your car,
check your not gas but a what?
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (23:21):
Uh? All right?
Speaker 1 (23:22):
You bathed with ivory? Uh huh?
Speaker 4 (23:26):
You eat these peanut butter, and what it's like saltine?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Saltine? Yes, uh huh?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
This goes in your garbage can and then you tie
and throw it away? What?
Speaker 5 (23:38):
No?
Speaker 6 (23:38):
No?
Speaker 4 (23:39):
Yes, a right, good word, good work, carg put a
six on it.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
Four for a tent?
Speaker 9 (23:45):
Your heart beating fast?
Speaker 4 (23:47):
Alright, well, Tater and TJ. Just five will tie and
force overtime. Six will win it.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
You're ready, TJ. Yeah, I'm going for the beau as
you are and go all right.
Speaker 9 (24:03):
This condiment is red, the opposite of mustard. You A
Lais makes these? You Yeah, you buy this on the
cob corn. You use this to on your toast or
with you know, with peanut butter. You have peanut butter
(24:25):
and Kelly four you can make this stuff in a minute,
or you can boil it. You put it with a side.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Dish, right right, Rice, Rice for the time, tin tin,
and we go over time. Alright, baas the overtime is
fifteen seconds, it'll go by very quick.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
As were you still thirty around here? I want to
stay with.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
What categories change category? Now, let's just stay with it.
Let's just stay with it. It was still in the
grocery store, me and Carlton for fifteen seconds. All right, Carlton,
you ready, buddy, you sir? Okay, start the clock. Now
buy this cold stuff vanilla or chocolate.
Speaker 5 (25:19):
Yeah, uh huh.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
These grow on trees.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
They are like orange their owl manine.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
No, keep going there in the color of your face.
Oh yeah, yes.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
All right, Cortes at the buzzer. Oh, frozen on peaches.
But that isn't two on the board and now TJ
and Tator two will force double over time, three will win.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
I'm okay and go.
Speaker 9 (25:56):
This is a lunch meat. It's made out of pork. Hey,
you put this, you put the you put the ham
on this on two pieces of chocolate chip? What chocolate chip?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
And we have a double over time, double over time there,
so well you try see if we can get it
settled in another fifteen seconds.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
All right, all right, Carton, are you ready? This is
intense that we are picking up on that last one.
Who you got it in your head? Start the clock?
Speaker 6 (26:45):
Now?
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Are you bake them chocolate chip?
Speaker 6 (26:48):
Chocolate chip? Why?
Speaker 7 (26:49):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Uh huh? You wipe with this after you use the bathroom?
Speaker 4 (26:54):
Yes, uh huh. You put this colorrock, says you. What
you put on stuff when you wash them? Floroxur and
a boy bleach on the three on the board. Now,
let's see if Tater and TJ can match that three
or get a four for the win. TJ, are you ready, buddy.
Speaker 5 (27:16):
I'm ready.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
I'm ready, brand new word, right and go.
Speaker 9 (27:20):
You bite this bird at Thanksgiving turkey. You need this
to make like biscuits or bread. No, it's an ingredient y.
You drink this in the morning, you buy it. It's
the boys.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
What we did here was end in a tie. You
both did wonderful. We do have a double overtime limit. Please,
we will hook you both up with some prizes for
your appearance and play.
Speaker 9 (28:00):
He's saying, Or we can have them rematch.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Oh well, that might be fun again, because this is what.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
This is a good match with He'll find out, all right.
Speaker 4 (28:10):
All right, let's say we can give y'all a little
something to hold you over there, Carlton and TJ and
I fact. If y'all boys agree with that, we'll have
a rematch so we can't get us a winner.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
All right, boys, appreciate you.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
Roll Hill, North Carolina, Greenwood, South Carolina to meet again. Alright, boys,
hang on, Jack can hook you up. Good Morning Make
Shows on the radio.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Requested midtime request bit of John Boy Eric Swilly.
Speaker 4 (28:46):
Eric Swilly says, I'd like to hear the beer run story. Well, Eric,
we can do that for you coming.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
Up next Good Morning Big Show.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
It's on the radio and something you would like to
hear around this time Monday through Friday.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
It's some of the John on on Facebook page. Got
a line in the mail bag of the Big Show dot.
Speaker 4 (29:29):
Com, Eric Swilley, Eric's your request.
Speaker 9 (29:38):
Letter.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
Oh we get letters. We get your letters that.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Reach whatever hered here letters.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
What you got to say? Oh boy, love letters.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
It's like it's like the Mousketeers and all of a
sudden Roy jumps out there to.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Do the leader.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I told you I read every letter that is mailed
here to the Big Show, and we appreciate you, and
you rest assured of that, even though we don't get
to all of them on on the radio.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Okay, here's one.
Speaker 7 (30:20):
Open it up.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
There's a copy of picture of a mug shot of
Jeffrey Newton. If you've ever sent your mugshot and a
fan letter to the Big.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Shot, well, look at this. Here's a copy of his
arraignment waiver form and a copy of your arraignment waiver form.
Let's see what Newton Jeffers charged with. Oh boy, that's
what do I say?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
It was from Scott State Prison in Hardwick, Georgia. See
DUI fleeing and fludging fludging, Oh my gosh, felony, aggravated assault,
no insurance, no tag, reckless driving.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
All right, let's go to the lall of my life.
Why don't you fight about it? Dear John Boyn Billy.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
As you can see, you have received another letter from
one of your captivated listeners. I wanted to write to
let y'all know that not all prisoners are mean and dangerous.
Some are merely stupid. After reading this, you will probably
want to call Jimmy Spencer and tell him to look
for a new nickname, because you have found the real
(31:34):
mister excitement. My story begins on a beautiful July day
in nineteen ninety five. I decided it was too nice
a day for work yet too hot to fish, so
I opted to relax in the air conditioning, watch them TV,
and enjoy a few cold beers. Several hours and about
(31:56):
a case of beer later, I decided that it was
critical that I repla my beer supply, and I was
not going to be I was not going to let
such minor details as not having a car or driver's
license to term me. Someone was nice enough to allow
me to use their nineteen seventy six Dodge that had
(32:18):
no tag, bald tires, and a six cylinder engine to
make my beer run in upon learning I'm sorry, Upon
leaving the local convenience store, a police officer got behind
me and hit the blue light. As you may know,
large quantities of beer tend to raise the testosterone level
(32:38):
while lowering the intelligent quotion what I hear in the
typical mail drinker. So I decided the race was on.
How did this go? You asked, Well.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Not too good.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
A twenty year old Dodge with a six cylinder and
ball tires is not the car of choice for this
type of activity. But I figured what I lacked in
horsepower I could make up for with my driving prowess.
And besides, you've got to run with what you brought
(33:18):
to the toys. I jumped out to an early lead,
but my competition quickly closed the gap. He attempted to
pass me on the low side. He darned sure wasn't
gonna go high. But I successfully blocked the pass and
(33:41):
he had to fall back in line. As we approached
the turn.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Took the air off his spoiler, no doubt.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
I lost it about halfway through turn one and put
her into the wall. Actually it was a ditch, but
it worked just as well, and I tell you, Spencer couldn't.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Have done it any better.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Ever, the quick thinker, I decided that this would be
a good time for a foot race, so I quickly
put Plan B into action.
Speaker 1 (34:15):
How did this go, you asked.
Speaker 9 (34:17):
When.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Being the beautiful day that it was, I was wearing
flip flops, and this is not the ideal footwear for
a race, especially when the participant wearing flip flops is
also drunk. At the end of the foot race, I
decided a wrestling match was it order Slammere, But unfortunately
(34:46):
for me, the cavalry had arrived by this time and
they entered the match without being tagged. As you can
probably tell from the mugshot, the wrestling match didn't turn
out too good either. However, I did feel somewhat vindicated
after I puked in the backseat of Dick Tracy's squad car.
(35:10):
I really did. Now two years later, I'm about to
make it home from my beer run.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
I have learned a few things.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
From this, and that is a never drive anything with
six cylinders and ball tires. Be always wear a good
pair of shoes, and see buy beer by the keg.
You know the saying life is short, play hard? Uh Okay,
give my best to Jackie and Rayford, and tell Randy
I hope he makes it back soon. This was when
(35:43):
you were out Rand. I know how it is because
I quite often missed a lot of work when I
had lingerie in my mouth.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
You all keep them straight up there, love you mean it.
Signed Dale Old Walter, Richard, Petty Rusty also Urban Gordon,
ern Hart Smith Johnson Junior.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
Good morning, it's.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
A big show on the radio a few moments, it says,
Monday Morning feature track with the Big Show, bid Box,
you like a visit from the Mayor Dismal Septs for your.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
John old Billy albums. Keywords political Mayor.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
That there's always something exciting happening in Dismal sep in
South Carolina. And we got the mayor on the phone,
ladies and gentlemen, the Honorable Merwin co fiddle swoop.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
How's it going, Mayor?
Speaker 6 (37:07):
You know, job boy, there's always something exciting happening in
dismal Seepach, South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (37:14):
I know I just said that.
Speaker 6 (37:16):
Oh okay, let me keep ahead here. Love the show
blah blah blah. How about those braves blah blah blah.
Not the heat, the humidity.
Speaker 9 (37:27):
Ah.
Speaker 6 (37:27):
Here, we are welcome to the big political Correctness Days
here in Dismal seepach.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Ah Political Correctness Days. So how does that work, Mayor?
Speaker 6 (37:37):
Pretty dark good? We hope. We just want a nice
festive weekend with no hullabaloo. So we've decided to do
a little something to appease all the thin skin pisson
owners in the community. Kicking off Friday night, We've got
the Big gabe Q cookoff.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Ah, does Dismal Sevage have a big game?
Speaker 7 (37:59):
Pop?
Speaker 6 (38:00):
Not really?
Speaker 10 (38:02):
Three?
Speaker 6 (38:03):
I think maybe four. I'm not sure about that Mannish
woman that works at the feed store. I can't get
a read on her, and the compound matters. I can't
be sure if any of them really know how to
run a grill.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
So what are you gonna do?
Speaker 6 (38:19):
We're busting some in from Myrtle Beach?
Speaker 1 (38:20):
Ah, Why Myrtle Beach?
Speaker 6 (38:23):
Have you been there? And the grand prize is a
weekend at Myrtle Beach, So we're hoping to save a
few bucks.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
What's on tap for Saturday.
Speaker 6 (38:33):
Saturday is the big Everybody's Legal Parade. All the non
citizens and undocumented workers will be guests of honor in
a big parade right down Main Street.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
Wait a second, is Dismal Seepage becoming a sanctuary city?
Speaker 6 (38:50):
Oh? Not at all. Truthfully, between you and me, we're
just moving a bunch of junk out of the old
courthouse into the landfill. So we're just slapping some crepe
paper balloons on the junk wagons and voila, it's a parade.
Plus it makes the day laborers feel like they're being appreciated.
See all those people standing along the parade route waving
(39:11):
and hollering gives them a warm feeling like they actually
belong here. And the people watching have no idea. They're
really just seeing a run to the dump.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Everybody wins, exactly.
Speaker 6 (39:22):
And Saturday night is all about the ladies. We're celebrating
good old women's Live. We'll kick it off with a
big bra burning bonfire and ironically the accompanying big Wheenie Roads.
Then it's a performance by the Chimpindales.
Speaker 1 (39:41):
You mean the Chippindales.
Speaker 6 (39:43):
No, it's like that, but with monkeys. Who doesn't love
a monkey and monkey strippers forget about them.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Monkeys strippers do? They like bowld dancers.
Speaker 6 (39:58):
Try to stop them. It's pretty hilarious. The hard part
is getting them down.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
It sounds like something for the whole family.
Speaker 6 (40:07):
Oh listen, kids have a ball putting bananas in the
monkeys garter.
Speaker 1 (40:11):
Yeah, sounds like a pretty full weekend.
Speaker 6 (40:13):
Oh and it's not over, John Boy. Sunday is the
Fix the Flag Day?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Fix the Flag Day?
Speaker 6 (40:21):
Well, you know, we've had some drama here in South
Carolina over a certain flag, so we're having a big
celebration as we introduce a new flag to flyover Dismal
Seepage City Hall.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Wow, a new flag or what's that?
Speaker 6 (40:35):
Like? You see, John Boy, we hear in Dismal Seepage
seek to be inclusive to all those groups and parties
seeking to be honored. So what we've done is designed
a flag for everyone.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
That sounds like a pretty impossible task.
Speaker 6 (40:51):
I think we got it covered. We've started with the
controversial stars and bars pattern, but instead of red and blue,
it's all the colors of the right bow.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
I don't know about dad.
Speaker 6 (41:02):
Moving on, have you ever been to Atlanta? You see
where I'm going with that? Of the upper left corner
is the.
Speaker 1 (41:11):
Crescent moon, the crescent moon from the Muslim flag.
Speaker 6 (41:15):
Yes and no, if you look close, it's the mac
tonight moon from the old McDonald's commercial.
Speaker 9 (41:20):
An.
Speaker 6 (41:20):
So we've taken care of Muslims and fat people all
in one stroke. And in the upper right corner is
a midget in a.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Sombrero who's that for?
Speaker 6 (41:29):
The commis sort of throwing them a bone there.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
That sounds like a mess, So the guy's going to
cause more trouble than before.
Speaker 6 (41:37):
Man, you know I'm looking at it right now. Eh,
it's a mess.
Speaker 1 (41:42):
So what are you gonna do?
Speaker 6 (41:46):
Well? The only thing I can do, Betty, Well, you'll
see if we can hold the monkeys over another day.
I think I got it covered because you know what
they say, yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
The monkeys, Yeah right.
Speaker 6 (42:00):
So come on, doald the politically correct days here in
dismal seepage the beautiful town with the horrible name, and
bring some bananas. We're gonna need.
Speaker 4 (42:13):
Big boxes here all your favorites from four decades of
The Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine
ninety nine.
Speaker 1 (42:19):
Buy them once, play them anywhere.
Speaker 10 (42:20):
You can shop the Big Box online right now at
the Big Show dot Com Horror Big Show Stuff I Phone.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one
Stuff Online services by Anemic dot Com.
Speaker 4 (42:29):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
You can hear it all the John Moore Million Lighton
Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast Magan Esi,
subscribe to us with a free I Heard Radio app.
Speaker 7 (42:42):
I Love you mean it
Good morning. There's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Monday morning, last day of March, and our feature track
when the Big Show, Big Box Mayor and this one
see if it's political correctness days.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
There's a keywords political mayor.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
When you hear the bid box happen the Big Show
dot com.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
There right now, it's time to try and beat the blonde.
I'll just find out when to agree with the blog
usually we do.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
Let's meet our contestant, Rick out of Cucumber, West Virginia.
Good morning, Richard, Good morning, Hey buddy, there we ever
had anybody out of Cucumber?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
What what?
Speaker 4 (01:11):
What's your town named after? Come on, oh god, yes
it is named after a cucumber.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
You're all good. They're growing cucumbers. That something about the
soul of.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
Bear is good.
Speaker 6 (01:25):
I never seen one.
Speaker 7 (01:27):
You've never seen a cucumber.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
Growing?
Speaker 8 (01:33):
Ok?
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Oh, Richard, We're glad you made it in here, buddy.
If you can figure Tighter out over here, she's seen
many you are.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
Wow.
Speaker 7 (01:49):
This accidental stuff just falls.
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Out where your head is. Sorry, there we go, Richard Tighter.
Speaker 4 (01:56):
Christopher Columbus history first bra the seeds of something to
the Western world. Then they begin popping up in Florida,
then South America, and now they're all over California. What
were they the seeds of.
Speaker 9 (02:14):
The seeds of discontain. That would be grape seeds, sir.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
Grape seeds. Grape seeds. You think that may be responsible
all the wonderful wine of the caliboy?
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Does that what you're thinking?
Speaker 9 (02:29):
They make wine?
Speaker 4 (02:31):
You've never seen one, Richard, don't think too hard. Tater says, grapes.
Do you agree or disagree?
Speaker 6 (02:40):
I would agree?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Ah, yes, oranges oranges with the seeds, bro Yes they are.
That was kind of a toughie. Thank you grapes for
a word.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
If you don't know, maybe go wild, you know they say, oh.
Speaker 9 (02:58):
Wow, the seeds of discontainer.
Speaker 6 (03:03):
That was good.
Speaker 1 (03:03):
Never mind, he did great, Okay, here we go.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
George Washington Carver was the man who was able to
do three hundred different things with.
Speaker 9 (03:16):
What Oh I noticed with a can of w D
forty you can do so much with that stuff.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
You are very right about it. I don't know if
that was around George Washington Carver.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I think he was WD two.
Speaker 2 (03:33):
One.
Speaker 9 (03:34):
Maybe he need a bunch of stuff with cotton, did.
Speaker 4 (03:37):
A bunch of stuff with cotton? Over three hundred different things,
is what Taylor's saying, Richard, agree or disagreed?
Speaker 6 (03:45):
I agree?
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Agreeing again with her.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
Huh, peanuts is what he did, three hundred different things
with peanuts.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
He was in all the paper. Well, Richard, we got
a consolation prize.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
It's the only game that we have consolation prizes for because,
as you see, we usually need them sometimes.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
You got it, buddy, appreciate you listening you and yours.
Speaker 7 (04:14):
I'm cucumber Jackie. Send him a cucumber.
Speaker 4 (04:26):
Bottom of the hore, top of your news left where
John Boys celebrations when y'all making fun of me about my.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Old girlfriend working at Hooters.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
All righty word, good morning.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
That's a big show on the radio for your Monday.
Mark's the Thursday. First look what I got Jackie gave us, Jamie,
John Boy Gwyn Motley, your very first girlfriend called and
she now works for Hooters and Gastonia. They are having
(05:36):
a swimsuit contest this Thursday, and I was hoping that
you would come down and judge it for her. So
is that makes to be all we need to know
about that story. I'll read you this pardon, she said,
(06:00):
that you were her first boyfriend. About ninety pounds, red
hair and freckles.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Yeah, three still had four years of high school eligibility.
Speaker 7 (06:23):
Yeah, this is before high school.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
This was like the sixth grade. I mean, she wasn't
my first girlfriend. She didn't know that girlfriends, that's kidding,
but she was the first, like real girlfriend. Were you
kiss you know? You know you all remember the first
one you kiss?
Speaker 10 (06:41):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (06:42):
I think you got on It's slinky.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yeah, I mean, gween, we we were pretty hot eyed
tom moving around sixth grade kissing.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
Well, that's how it ended, but that was later.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Let's say, y'all amused why women dig me these days?
I's ninety pounds, red hair and freckles. Got the hottest
girl in the sixth grade? Hello, she's mid working at Hooters.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
You want mild wings? Or to me, I ain't kind
of damning on my.
Speaker 9 (07:33):
Fin getting his red hair and everything.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Fish guesting you. I'm sorry, honey, was shutting a nunder
bucket of beer. Well, it certainly is a Motley crew
And today you tell me was dating a college girl back.
Speaker 11 (08:09):
I'm sorry, Glenn, And she says he used to be
ninety pounds and red hair, and freckles, and I is
to ninety.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
He's got back hair like Bigfoot, but still has ninety
pounds of red hair. She is working at Hooters in
gas Stone day All right.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Now easy, my mom works at Hooters and Gaston. Oh man,
there's my kissing memory and y'all right?
Speaker 1 (08:44):
So can I go Jack?
Speaker 7 (08:48):
No, f.
Speaker 12 (08:58):
If I used to kiss you. Mail to the Big Show, yod.
Speaker 4 (09:27):
Morning, Big Shows on the radio. Worried about sizzle. We
got our agent. Let's see you. It's on the desk.
Speaker 10 (09:34):
Get red Hot Hello, Red Hot Tel't Incorporated, home of
the Hot Ones for forty four years. Ready to tickle
your eyes and your ears are actually the best the
top of the heat except Jimbo and Bobby, but they're
really cheating.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
I just missed best out. No, this is time on Bella.
Speaker 6 (09:52):
Here.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
How's our favorite girl the whole wide world?
Speaker 6 (09:55):
Unless I hurt you so married to kid rocks you.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
I'm glad to hear it is Murray round.
Speaker 10 (10:03):
No, he's kind of oblong with a wap head. Sorry,
there's this idiot that used to call here and say
that all the time.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
Yeah, I know that was me.
Speaker 10 (10:12):
I rest my kids.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
That's a good you put murray on sure.
Speaker 6 (10:17):
Hold on, hey my, what a great looking tie. You
know you could never tell you're wearing a.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Hairpye put him on the telephone.
Speaker 6 (10:27):
Oh okay, sure, hey my, jump on Bobby on two?
Speaker 10 (10:32):
No, really, hello, jump out? I love you mean it?
Hey man, I was looking for you guys at the
race over the weekend.
Speaker 6 (10:41):
You went to the race, that's right.
Speaker 10 (10:43):
While you and Maiderman went down in the infield, eating
chili and lighting poots, I was up on the sweet level,
closing a pair of big money deals with Roy McKee,
the president of Royco International Petroleum Corporation.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
Wow, so some products.
Speaker 10 (11:01):
Mega Shine three thousand, the world's finest once a year
car polish mechan Note, Babe, Thursday afternoon, two o'clock, we're
shooting a TV commercial.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
I go Thursday three o'clock. When do we get to
see the script?
Speaker 6 (11:17):
Oh?
Speaker 10 (11:17):
I don't think you'll need to see the script.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
You mean we're going to wig it?
Speaker 10 (11:20):
Well, actually you're not really in the commercial. I just
rented them your truck for the afternoon.
Speaker 5 (11:26):
My truck.
Speaker 6 (11:27):
It should be really.
Speaker 10 (11:27):
Clean when you get it back. And they said they're
going to shine up and run it through a car wash.
Fifty two times.
Speaker 6 (11:32):
Verry, Oh, don't.
Speaker 10 (11:33):
Worry, Roy says, Mega Shine three thousand is the best.
Oh and Friday afternoon, we're shooting a spot for Megalube
three thousand. It's a motor oil additive.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
All right, now, am I in that one?
Speaker 6 (11:46):
No?
Speaker 10 (11:47):
I sauld, that's just your truck again. They're gonna crank
it up, drin out all the oil and let it
run for fifteen minutes. We again, Megalube is an excellent product.
I really require it.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
Where are you supposed to get my face on TV?
Not my truck?
Speaker 10 (12:00):
Well, no offense, babe, Your truck has been a little
bit better maintain. So are you in?
Speaker 2 (12:06):
I guess so about the best we're gonna get out
of an agent like you.
Speaker 10 (12:09):
Excuse me, Jimbo, Please, are you suggesting I'm just using
you to close a deal, that I don't really care
about the longtime health of your career, that I'm just
taking the path of least resistance to an easy buck?
Is that how you think it is?
Speaker 1 (12:24):
You mean, that's not how it is, of course not.
Speaker 10 (12:27):
It's just that I mean you and went Ryan, Okay, yeah,
that pretty much is how it is, all right, But
look on the bright Side fifty two free cardes.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Oh good, but better work.
Speaker 10 (12:39):
Trust me, babe. Hey listen, we'll talk it over. We'll
super lunch thing later. Have your machine called my machine?
All right? Now, I gotta make like a banana.
Speaker 1 (12:46):
You mean you're gonna split?
Speaker 10 (12:47):
Now I'm gonna dive into a bowl of corn flakes.
Speaker 6 (12:50):
A sorry, babe.
Speaker 10 (12:53):
There was this idiot that used to call here and
say that all the time. Hey, listen, let's do the
lunch thing. Have you a machine call my machine? And Jimbo,
what did you ever know that you're my hero and
everything I would like to be. I can fly higher
than an eagle because you are the wind beneath my
sheet wings. You are the wings beneath my sheet.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
No, you're the wind beneath my wings.
Speaker 10 (13:18):
Well, thanks baby, and not so bad you. Oh and
give my little Bobby. That's Billy him too, and jib
O what call me?
Speaker 1 (13:27):
Good morning?
Speaker 2 (13:28):
Big Show's on the radio, more big show right around
the corner.
Speaker 8 (13:32):
I'm working with mister mill Cox over his outfit. And
I like to listen to John Boy and Billy and
they're big Yo. I like the way they talk.
Speaker 1 (13:42):
They're a funny ha ha not funny queers.
Speaker 8 (13:47):
That's what they say. Anyhow, I've figured out what John
Boy had a hard time getting started in the morning.
I ain't gotten the gage.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
Good morning. It's a big show on the radio. Quicker
mind about the John.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Bone Billy Late Risers podcast every Monday through Friday. After
we wrap up the broadcast. You know where going at
get you ready of a podcast. But wherever you get
your podcast, you can make it easy. Subscribe to us
with a free iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 6 (14:48):
Do that.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
Earlier this morning, needed the b higgle Oliver coming in
talking about me being old Jackie is singing do then
swerving mol Hooter's girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Y'all thought that was funny, didn't. I still think it's funny.
I guess that's what it is.
Speaker 9 (15:11):
You're soup soup arrogan about it.
Speaker 10 (15:14):
It is.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
For so smug.
Speaker 7 (15:17):
Yeah, it's about the city.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
I guess over, but that's what we're talking about. John
Boy billing Late Risers podcast later this Monday morning.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
Wordy Words, song and wordy Word all coming up right quick.
John Boy's Wonderful Thing Number one hundred and thirty seven
is a copy of the new book The Whole Truth
about Spring Turkey Hunting according to ronic Couz Strickland from
Marsey Oak autographed by Grand Slam holder John Boy.
Speaker 1 (15:45):
That will make it personalized. Whoever we draw.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
For the winner this Friday gets your naming the hat
the Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 9 (15:53):
Another random wings.
Speaker 4 (15:55):
Yeah yeah, I got a big show on the radio.
We got a wordy word song here, getting ready to
queue up? Get you ready to play? The winner gets
an assortment of swag from World Lawn. Moores makers are
the best value zero turn moores on the market. They
feature a three year unlimited hours warning, Kawihaki engines, and
(16:18):
heavy duty steal decks. Mowodo Landscaping's best kept secret. World
Lawn find their link to The Big Show dot Com.
Speaker 1 (16:26):
Right now, let's do it all.
Speaker 2 (16:31):
Look at here?
Speaker 11 (16:33):
Who's that calling the studio line? Why it's almost wordy
word time? Hey, they want to play wordy Word. It's
easier than you heard. You got the skills it takes
to win this game. Listen to me, it's only little
(16:57):
wordy word. Don't be such a chicken turn.
Speaker 13 (17:03):
If you back out now, your friends will think to
your lame.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Why a big brain you have?
Speaker 13 (17:15):
You're gonna win and make up bad to ensure you
have a real good time.
Speaker 1 (17:22):
I'll make sure you get some words that rhyme.
Speaker 13 (17:28):
What a big score you half your opponent will show beside.
So till you hear that winning us spelled, you'll short
enough better to ride like hell. So keep that thinking
cap on or your chance as well. Soon big gone.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
And you'll be sitting in loser bill.
Speaker 11 (17:53):
All alone. You can win and wordy word. You don't
have to be a nerd.
Speaker 7 (18:05):
But if you.
Speaker 13 (18:06):
Wind the older renness team, then you won't.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
John sixty seconds. You have to earn that victory.
Speaker 5 (18:20):
Laugh.
Speaker 13 (18:22):
If you can't beat the clock, you'll be a laughing stock.
Then the ridicule never rest from your family and your friends.
Speaker 1 (18:38):
What a food you'll be? Your matter stick with taking sea.
Speaker 11 (18:46):
So come on, play wordy word, give lady luck the bird.
Speaker 13 (18:53):
You're either gonna win this thing or you won't.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
Who you won't? You ain't gonna win no way?
Speaker 6 (19:09):
What you mind?
Speaker 2 (19:11):
Not?
Speaker 10 (19:18):
All right?
Speaker 4 (19:19):
We're ready for worthy word now huh h may run
the hooters girls off.
Speaker 1 (19:26):
A come on, let's get h okay, that's what.
Speaker 4 (19:32):
One ain't er big show you don't free line. We'll
get a couple of contestans and play next good morning,
(20:02):
make shows on the radio.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Running to you Monday, March Thur the first mayor disimal
sever its my feature track today end up in Merlin
here and up be requested bit in the morning, in
minutes and right now, let's play.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
I went to everybody's head about the bed the third
word worthy. Let's meet the contestants.
Speaker 4 (20:24):
We got Carlton from Rural Hill, North Carolina. Good morning, Carlton,
John Boy, Welcome Bonnie. See who you playing? You got
TJ out of Greenwood, South Carolina. Good morning, TJ.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
Hello, John Boy the show.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Hello, all right, TJ. How about TJ and Taylor? T TJ? Okay,
they're mind the letters, but yeah, I don't work, and
me and Carlton we'll go as well, so uh TJ.
Speaker 4 (20:57):
Carlton, Welcome boys, South Carolina versus North two rounds.
Speaker 1 (21:01):
See what we can do. Let's show him on his
Graham high schooled. Well, try not to shove off TJ.
You relax, all right, Carlton? Are you ready?
Speaker 4 (21:12):
We got a theme this morning, by the way, things
in a grocery store, things you would find in a
grocery store.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
All right, you ready at Carlton, Yes, sir, all right,
start the clock.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Now, this comes from a cow and you drink it milk.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Uh huh.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
Johnny planted seeds for these kind of trees, apple trees.
Speaker 5 (21:36):
Uh huh uh.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
The opposite of ketchup is the yellow uh huh uh.
Speaker 4 (21:42):
This is what you get out of a dairy product
that you churn.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Yeah, what kind of cheese is No, it's just cheese.
It's the orange kind, sharp one sharp sharp, yes, that's it.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
All right, okay, all right, man and I couldn't figure
out a way to get the chatter cheese like that,
but you did a good job, Caughton.
Speaker 1 (22:04):
So uh four on the board.
Speaker 4 (22:06):
All right, Well, let's see what TJ and Tatter's got
from their round one.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
You ready, TJ?
Speaker 6 (22:12):
I'm ready?
Speaker 9 (22:12):
John Boyle, alright, and go pick up some spuds.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
What are you gonna buy potatoes? Huh?
Speaker 9 (22:20):
This, Jeff is some peter Pan is the you You
might need some sauce and these kind of noodles.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
To make what spaghetti you uh in the morning.
Speaker 9 (22:32):
Quaker makes this kind of stuff. It's mushy, but the
whole word, the whole word egg. These are green vegetables.
They come in a pod.
Speaker 1 (22:49):
Dolphin slipper.
Speaker 4 (22:52):
All right, that was a five on the board, tapping
the lead by one. All right, and I'll call me
and you for round two. Let's see what we can do.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Are you ready? Yes, sir?
Speaker 6 (23:04):
All right?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Starting to clock now, chickens lay these?
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Hey, you put this white stuff to make it sweet
in your coffee, sugar check your blank in your car,
check your not gas but a what?
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (23:21):
Uh? All right?
Speaker 1 (23:22):
You bathed with ivory? Uh huh?
Speaker 4 (23:26):
You eat these peanut butter, and what it's like saltine?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Saltine? Yes, uh huh?
Speaker 2 (23:33):
This goes in your garbage can and then you tie
and throw it away? What?
Speaker 5 (23:38):
No?
Speaker 6 (23:38):
No?
Speaker 4 (23:39):
Yes, a right, good word, good work, carg put a
six on it.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
Four for a tent?
Speaker 9 (23:45):
Your heart beating fast?
Speaker 4 (23:47):
Alright, well, Tater and TJ. Just five will tie and
force overtime. Six will win it.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
You're ready, TJ. Yeah, I'm going for the beau as
you are and go all right.
Speaker 9 (24:03):
This condiment is red, the opposite of mustard. You A
Lais makes these? You Yeah, you buy this on the
cob corn. You use this to on your toast or
with you know, with peanut butter. You have peanut butter
(24:25):
and Kelly four you can make this stuff in a minute,
or you can boil it. You put it with a side.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Dish, right right, Rice, Rice for the time, tin tin,
and we go over time. Alright, baas the overtime is
fifteen seconds, it'll go by very quick.
Speaker 1 (24:51):
As were you still thirty around here? I want to
stay with.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
What categories change category? Now, let's just stay with it.
Let's just stay with it. It was still in the
grocery store, me and Carlton for fifteen seconds. All right, Carlton,
you ready, buddy, you sir? Okay, start the clock. Now
buy this cold stuff vanilla or chocolate.
Speaker 5 (25:19):
Yeah, uh huh.
Speaker 1 (25:20):
These grow on trees.
Speaker 4 (25:21):
They are like orange their owl manine.
Speaker 1 (25:28):
No, keep going there in the color of your face.
Oh yeah, yes.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
All right, Cortes at the buzzer. Oh, frozen on peaches.
But that isn't two on the board and now TJ
and Tator two will force double over time, three will win.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
I'm okay and go.
Speaker 9 (25:56):
This is a lunch meat. It's made out of pork. Hey,
you put this, you put the you put the ham
on this on two pieces of chocolate chip? What chocolate chip?
Speaker 4 (26:15):
And we have a double over time, double over time there,
so well you try see if we can get it
settled in another fifteen seconds.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
All right, all right, Carton, are you ready? This is
intense that we are picking up on that last one.
Who you got it in your head? Start the clock?
Speaker 6 (26:45):
Now?
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Are you bake them chocolate chip?
Speaker 6 (26:48):
Chocolate chip? Why?
Speaker 7 (26:49):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Uh huh? You wipe with this after you use the bathroom?
Speaker 4 (26:54):
Yes, uh huh. You put this colorrock, says you. What
you put on stuff when you wash them? Floroxur and
a boy bleach on the three on the board. Now,
let's see if Tater and TJ can match that three
or get a four for the win. TJ, are you ready, buddy.
Speaker 5 (27:16):
I'm ready.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
I'm ready, brand new word, right and go.
Speaker 9 (27:20):
You bite this bird at Thanksgiving turkey. You need this
to make like biscuits or bread. No, it's an ingredient y.
You drink this in the morning, you buy it. It's
the boys.
Speaker 4 (27:40):
What we did here was end in a tie. You
both did wonderful. We do have a double overtime limit. Please,
we will hook you both up with some prizes for
your appearance and play.
Speaker 9 (28:00):
He's saying, Or we can have them rematch.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
Oh well, that might be fun again, because this is what.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
This is a good match with He'll find out, all right.
Speaker 4 (28:10):
All right, let's say we can give y'all a little
something to hold you over there, Carlton and TJ and
I fact. If y'all boys agree with that, we'll have
a rematch so we can't get us a winner.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
All right, boys, appreciate you.
Speaker 4 (28:23):
Roll Hill, North Carolina, Greenwood, South Carolina to meet again. Alright, boys,
hang on, Jack can hook you up. Good Morning Make
Shows on the radio.
Speaker 3 (28:39):
Requested midtime request bit of John Boy Eric Swilly.
Speaker 4 (28:46):
Eric Swilly says, I'd like to hear the beer run story. Well, Eric,
we can do that for you coming.
Speaker 1 (28:52):
Up next Good Morning Big Show.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
It's on the radio and something you would like to
hear around this time Monday through Friday.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
It's some of the John on on Facebook page. Got
a line in the mail bag of the Big Show dot.
Speaker 4 (29:29):
Com, Eric Swilley, Eric's your request.
Speaker 9 (29:38):
Letter.
Speaker 1 (29:39):
Oh we get letters. We get your letters that.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Reach whatever hered here letters.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
What you got to say? Oh boy, love letters.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
It's like it's like the Mousketeers and all of a
sudden Roy jumps out there to.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
Do the leader.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
I told you I read every letter that is mailed
here to the Big Show, and we appreciate you, and
you rest assured of that, even though we don't get
to all of them on on the radio.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
Okay, here's one.
Speaker 7 (30:20):
Open it up.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
There's a copy of picture of a mug shot of
Jeffrey Newton. If you've ever sent your mugshot and a
fan letter to the Big.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Shot, well, look at this. Here's a copy of his
arraignment waiver form and a copy of your arraignment waiver form.
Let's see what Newton Jeffers charged with. Oh boy, that's
what do I say?
Speaker 2 (30:48):
It was from Scott State Prison in Hardwick, Georgia. See
DUI fleeing and fludging fludging, Oh my gosh, felony, aggravated assault,
no insurance, no tag, reckless driving.
Speaker 1 (31:08):
All right, let's go to the lall of my life.
Why don't you fight about it? Dear John Boyn Billy.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
As you can see, you have received another letter from
one of your captivated listeners. I wanted to write to
let y'all know that not all prisoners are mean and dangerous.
Some are merely stupid. After reading this, you will probably
want to call Jimmy Spencer and tell him to look
for a new nickname, because you have found the real
(31:34):
mister excitement. My story begins on a beautiful July day
in nineteen ninety five. I decided it was too nice
a day for work yet too hot to fish, so
I opted to relax in the air conditioning, watch them TV,
and enjoy a few cold beers. Several hours and about
(31:56):
a case of beer later, I decided that it was
critical that I repla my beer supply, and I was
not going to be I was not going to let
such minor details as not having a car or driver's
license to term me. Someone was nice enough to allow
me to use their nineteen seventy six Dodge that had
(32:18):
no tag, bald tires, and a six cylinder engine to
make my beer run in upon learning I'm sorry, Upon
leaving the local convenience store, a police officer got behind
me and hit the blue light. As you may know,
large quantities of beer tend to raise the testosterone level
(32:38):
while lowering the intelligent quotion what I hear in the
typical mail drinker. So I decided the race was on.
How did this go? You asked, Well.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Not too good.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
A twenty year old Dodge with a six cylinder and
ball tires is not the car of choice for this
type of activity. But I figured what I lacked in
horsepower I could make up for with my driving prowess.
And besides, you've got to run with what you brought
(33:18):
to the toys. I jumped out to an early lead,
but my competition quickly closed the gap. He attempted to
pass me on the low side. He darned sure wasn't
gonna go high. But I successfully blocked the pass and
(33:41):
he had to fall back in line. As we approached
the turn.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
Took the air off his spoiler, no doubt.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
I lost it about halfway through turn one and put
her into the wall. Actually it was a ditch, but
it worked just as well, and I tell you, Spencer couldn't.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Have done it any better.
Speaker 2 (34:04):
Ever, the quick thinker, I decided that this would be
a good time for a foot race, so I quickly
put Plan B into action.
Speaker 1 (34:15):
How did this go, you asked.
Speaker 9 (34:17):
When.
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Being the beautiful day that it was, I was wearing
flip flops, and this is not the ideal footwear for
a race, especially when the participant wearing flip flops is
also drunk. At the end of the foot race, I
decided a wrestling match was it order Slammere, But unfortunately
(34:46):
for me, the cavalry had arrived by this time and
they entered the match without being tagged. As you can
probably tell from the mugshot, the wrestling match didn't turn
out too good either. However, I did feel somewhat vindicated
after I puked in the backseat of Dick Tracy's squad car.
(35:10):
I really did. Now two years later, I'm about to
make it home from my beer run.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
I have learned a few things.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
From this, and that is a never drive anything with
six cylinders and ball tires. Be always wear a good
pair of shoes, and see buy beer by the keg.
You know the saying life is short, play hard? Uh Okay,
give my best to Jackie and Rayford, and tell Randy
I hope he makes it back soon. This was when
(35:43):
you were out Rand. I know how it is because
I quite often missed a lot of work when I
had lingerie in my mouth.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (35:55):
You all keep them straight up there, love you mean it.
Signed Dale Old Walter, Richard, Petty Rusty also Urban Gordon,
ern Hart Smith Johnson Junior.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
Good morning, it's.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
A big show on the radio a few moments, it says,
Monday Morning feature track with the Big Show, bid Box,
you like a visit from the Mayor Dismal Septs for your.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
John old Billy albums. Keywords political Mayor.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
That there's always something exciting happening in Dismal sep in
South Carolina. And we got the mayor on the phone,
ladies and gentlemen, the Honorable Merwin co fiddle swoop.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
How's it going, Mayor?
Speaker 6 (37:07):
You know, job boy, there's always something exciting happening in
dismal Seepach, South Carolina.
Speaker 1 (37:14):
I know I just said that.
Speaker 6 (37:16):
Oh okay, let me keep ahead here. Love the show
blah blah blah. How about those braves blah blah blah.
Not the heat, the humidity.
Speaker 9 (37:27):
Ah.
Speaker 6 (37:27):
Here, we are welcome to the big political Correctness Days
here in Dismal seepach.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
Ah Political Correctness Days. So how does that work, Mayor?
Speaker 6 (37:37):
Pretty dark good? We hope. We just want a nice
festive weekend with no hullabaloo. So we've decided to do
a little something to appease all the thin skin pisson
owners in the community. Kicking off Friday night, We've got
the Big gabe Q cookoff.
Speaker 1 (37:57):
Ah, does Dismal Sevage have a big game?
Speaker 7 (37:59):
Pop?
Speaker 6 (38:00):
Not really?
Speaker 10 (38:02):
Three?
Speaker 6 (38:03):
I think maybe four. I'm not sure about that Mannish
woman that works at the feed store. I can't get
a read on her, and the compound matters. I can't
be sure if any of them really know how to
run a grill.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
So what are you gonna do?
Speaker 6 (38:19):
We're busting some in from Myrtle Beach?
Speaker 1 (38:20):
Ah, Why Myrtle Beach?
Speaker 6 (38:23):
Have you been there? And the grand prize is a
weekend at Myrtle Beach, So we're hoping to save a
few bucks.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
What's on tap for Saturday.
Speaker 6 (38:33):
Saturday is the big Everybody's Legal Parade. All the non
citizens and undocumented workers will be guests of honor in
a big parade right down Main Street.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
Wait a second, is Dismal Seepage becoming a sanctuary city?
Speaker 6 (38:50):
Oh? Not at all. Truthfully, between you and me, we're
just moving a bunch of junk out of the old
courthouse into the landfill. So we're just slapping some crepe
paper balloons on the junk wagons and voila, it's a parade.
Plus it makes the day laborers feel like they're being appreciated.
See all those people standing along the parade route waving
(39:11):
and hollering gives them a warm feeling like they actually
belong here. And the people watching have no idea. They're
really just seeing a run to the dump.
Speaker 1 (39:20):
Everybody wins, exactly.
Speaker 6 (39:22):
And Saturday night is all about the ladies. We're celebrating
good old women's Live. We'll kick it off with a
big bra burning bonfire and ironically the accompanying big Wheenie Roads.
Then it's a performance by the Chimpindales.
Speaker 1 (39:41):
You mean the Chippindales.
Speaker 6 (39:43):
No, it's like that, but with monkeys. Who doesn't love
a monkey and monkey strippers forget about them.
Speaker 2 (39:54):
Monkeys strippers do? They like bowld dancers.
Speaker 6 (39:58):
Try to stop them. It's pretty hilarious. The hard part
is getting them down.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
It sounds like something for the whole family.
Speaker 6 (40:07):
Oh listen, kids have a ball putting bananas in the
monkeys garter.
Speaker 1 (40:11):
Yeah, sounds like a pretty full weekend.
Speaker 6 (40:13):
Oh and it's not over, John Boy. Sunday is the
Fix the Flag Day?
Speaker 1 (40:19):
Fix the Flag Day?
Speaker 6 (40:21):
Well, you know, we've had some drama here in South
Carolina over a certain flag, so we're having a big
celebration as we introduce a new flag to flyover Dismal
Seepage City Hall.
Speaker 1 (40:33):
Wow, a new flag or what's that?
Speaker 6 (40:35):
Like? You see, John Boy, we hear in Dismal Seepage
seek to be inclusive to all those groups and parties
seeking to be honored. So what we've done is designed
a flag for everyone.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
That sounds like a pretty impossible task.
Speaker 6 (40:51):
I think we got it covered. We've started with the
controversial stars and bars pattern, but instead of red and blue,
it's all the colors of the right bow.
Speaker 1 (41:01):
I don't know about dad.
Speaker 6 (41:02):
Moving on, have you ever been to Atlanta? You see
where I'm going with that? Of the upper left corner
is the.
Speaker 1 (41:11):
Crescent moon, the crescent moon from the Muslim flag.
Speaker 6 (41:15):
Yes and no, if you look close, it's the mac
tonight moon from the old McDonald's commercial.
Speaker 9 (41:20):
An.
Speaker 6 (41:20):
So we've taken care of Muslims and fat people all
in one stroke. And in the upper right corner is
a midget in a.
Speaker 1 (41:27):
Sombrero who's that for?
Speaker 6 (41:29):
The commis sort of throwing them a bone there.
Speaker 2 (41:33):
That sounds like a mess, So the guy's going to
cause more trouble than before.
Speaker 6 (41:37):
Man, you know I'm looking at it right now. Eh,
it's a mess.
Speaker 1 (41:42):
So what are you gonna do?
Speaker 6 (41:46):
Well? The only thing I can do, Betty, Well, you'll
see if we can hold the monkeys over another day.
I think I got it covered because you know what
they say, yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
The monkeys, Yeah right.
Speaker 6 (42:00):
So come on, doald the politically correct days here in
dismal seepage the beautiful town with the horrible name, and
bring some bananas. We're gonna need.
Speaker 4 (42:13):
Big boxes here all your favorites from four decades of
The Big Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine
ninety nine.
Speaker 1 (42:19):
Buy them once, play them anywhere.
Speaker 10 (42:20):
You can shop the Big Box online right now at
the Big Show dot Com Horror Big Show Stuff I Phone.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one
Stuff Online services by Anemic dot Com.
Speaker 4 (42:29):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
You can hear it all the John Moore Million Lighton
Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast Magan Esi,
subscribe to us with a free I Heard Radio app.
Speaker 7 (42:42):
I Love you mean it
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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