December 31, 2025 • 37 mins
Wednesday (pt 2 of 2): On what may be the Final Edition of The John Boy & Billy Late Riser’s Podcast, we’ll look at some opportunities the Elvis Pressley Estate missed out on.. - Oliver is back in - this time to talk about dealing with an aging woman.. - John Boy discovers some Biblical Bloopers from kids.. - Randy authorizes a listener to nickname their newborn “Doodles”.. - We’ll bust tater’s brain with some Chocolate Math.. - John Boy shares some one-liners to rollout during your next colonoscopy.. - Do women actually get prettier at closing time? - We’ll find out!.. - and since this may be our last podcast show - we’ll roll out with the first collaborated bit created by John Boy & Billy - “Burger Biggie”…
..and with that - we want to thank all of you for tuning in over the past 45-years and for taking us all on the ride of our lives… - God Bless - and LYMI
℗®© 2025 John Boy & Billy, Inc.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Good Wedness morning, and you got a big show on
your radio. Alrighty, let's welcome brand new big show sponsor.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
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every single haircut, right, Doodles, get the chair and I'll
(01:22):
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Speaker 3 (01:27):
A little off the top. What the hell is this?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
The next and.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Doodle's Hair Salon is fully liquor licensed by the state
and the bar is always open.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
You are you are a little no thank you. I'll
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(02:01):
are you okay to do this? You shut your mom.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
My gear flat is the d go All the kids
are getting that?
Speaker 4 (02:14):
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(02:36):
comb under, beehives, burn.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Nest, Princess Leah.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
And even that stupid fluck of seagulls hairdoo that you
used to wear and get your ass kicked by Girl
Scout Troop forty three and you had to buy a
lifetime supply of dosy nose in order to get your
retainer back.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Nice haircut, dicky boy.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Ha ha, and how friends doodles hairon is unlike any
place you've ever been. We cater to your every whim.
We even have our very old messus on staff. Just
ask for old man hands curry hold on, no, Nah,
go ahead, So come on down to Doodle's Hair Salon,
(03:27):
just off Sweeney Todd Boulevard, across from the offices of
James S. Murray, Pet Cremation and Grandparent Divorce. Doodle's Hair Salon.
Put your head in her hands, Ah Daria, remember the
name friends, Doodle's Hair Salon. This is your old pal
Burtfern saying I'll see you there.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
Get your hair.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Cut anyway you walk and Doodle's hair Soalon, Get your
hair cut anyway you walk at Doodle's Hair Solam, we'll
get give you a perm or shorten the back, even
trim the.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Hair at the top of your crack.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Get your hair cut anyway you want a Doodle's hair salon.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
What's happening? What's guy? The Rabbi Shlomo here listen there.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
Then I'm in the kitchen ripping up some crip locks
or shot get filthy fish.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Or a big part of those hurt and schlaping shaking.
Speaker 5 (04:33):
Nothing keeps a smile on my face like listening to
my favorite schlamel and shlumozle John Boy and Billy down
regular hush and Fee Incorporated.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
See you guys on headecks. Huh what's that like?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Good morning, you got a big show on the radio.
Well you guys over fifty, you know what we're talking about.
Say you got to get a colonoscopy. Uh, pillers, you
just had one recently that it's been a couple of years,
but it still uh well uh, this doctor said, these
(05:44):
are actual comments made. You're the exam when when they
were doing the col because you're conscious, right, Well I was,
and then I started I kept talking. They shut me
up by give me another shot.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Proper file, and I was out.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
You said, last thing you saw was like, hey, I'm
still awake, And she got rid in the face and
said nighty night and.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Par thumb click the button and that was it. A
physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by
his patience, predominantly male, while he was performing there colonoscamy. Yeah,
ah right here, that's all good colony music. Take it easy, doc.
(06:30):
You're boldly going where no man is gone before. Find
a milia ere heart yet, can you hear me?
Speaker 7 (06:38):
Now?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Are we there yet? Are we there yet? You know?
Arkansas would now be legally married. Things said during a
colonoscomy any sign of a trapped miner's chief, you put
your left hand in you.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
Take your.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Sounds more poky than Hey. Now I know how a
muppet feels. If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit. Hey, doc,
let me know if you find my dignity. You used
to be an executive at n Ronde. We just talked
about it. Now I know why I'm not gay. The
(07:29):
last actual statement made growing up Colonoscomy. Get better at
if we walk?
Speaker 3 (07:35):
Sure you are?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Could you write a note for my wife saying that
my head is not up there? Good morning is a
big show on the radio. It is Kernavan's quiz time
biddle what we're dealing with? Technology news? Microsoft says no
(07:58):
to Parno on your mobile phone. All right, one eight hundred.
Big show you told free line call on up for
you the right caller, Jackie. Let you know you take
C and you win.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
Next.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
Good Wednesday morning, got a big showing a ready to
go That girl spell qualified, Oh Shay, jan call Wills,
It's time color quiz. Jane sat Hey to Mary from Leesburg, Pennsylvania.
(08:52):
Hello Mary, good morning. There's something about Mary that you
don't knowh tell us something we don't know about you. Mary,
I got brown eyes by brown Eyed Girl. You know
everything is not a sort of keep's I singing about it?
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Alright?
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Mary, thank you baby? Hang on, listen to Billy and
Windows Prize package. Well.
Speaker 6 (09:19):
Last month, Apple removed all products to feature nudity and
adult oriented content from their iPhone app store and poll
customers if you want porn by a different phone now.
Microsoft has also joined the no nipples bandwagon, announcing that
their upcoming version of their Windows phone will also be
what they call a porn free zone. Some observers are
(09:43):
saying Microsoft's no porn policy is a mistake because A
it makes them just like Apple, b censorship is wrong,
or c if you want to screw yourself, it's hard
to be buying something with Microsoft.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
Un What say, Mary, I gotta take sea on.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
I know I sound old, but remember the good old
days on the phone. You'd call somebody and they could
call you right now, and if there was part and
it was like it was live. Yeah. Would you just
have party lines when you listen in? You have those
as a kid. I had those as a kid. Oh yeah,
you have to phone somebody else? Is talking on them. Yeah, weird.
You have to ask your neighbor. Can I make a
(10:30):
phone call? I never to hear it? Pick up John,
Jesus keeping what are you eighty? Hey Mary?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Where do you go? Baby? Thank you?
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Can I get a shot out?
Speaker 1 (10:44):
You sure can? I'd like to say hi to Elizabeth
and Nathan. Well, all right, you just did appreciate you
and yours up in Pennsylvani you're listening to the Big Show.
Thank you, good morning. You got the Big Show on
the radio.
Speaker 9 (10:58):
Hey, that's that's your old Pelgart And I'm not working
a lot over abusey Nissan or working the friar over
abusive burghers Colin Gaylord Sartage two in the morning to
sing body holotoones. I'm listening to my favorite fellow head
injury patience John by Don every morning on the Big Show. Man.
(11:22):
When was the last time I had hand?
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Good morning? It's on Wednesday to beg show was on radio.
I tell you I wasn't calling you bugle eyed. I
didn't mean to be so facial when you go wait,
talk about picking up the phone and somebody order to
be telling me, don't it not? Just a little over
Tater's young head about that. I know about three way calling,
and they used to do that and be quiet while
(12:18):
they were talking about me on the other line. There
weren't enough lines, so you had to share them with
other people in the neighborhood. That sounds frustrating. It was
what if you had a Gabby person in the neighborhood? Oh, yeah,
like me? Well you remember Mayberry? Where did where did
everybody would let the sisters talk on Sunday afternoon to
catch up? Yeah, Malcolm from Charlotte was there. There are
(12:41):
men orb the whole town shuts down, so two ladies
can talk about their feet falling asleep? Order what causes that?
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Oh, that's what it was.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And I think maybe we had like three household sharing
a LDIA. I mean, you know this is when I
was real young, know.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
I mean, you have meetings, how'd you organize it?
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well? No, you know, when somebody's using phone pick up
all the sorry sorry catches catch can Yeah, well they
finished in a minute. Then then the art was having
them think you hung up while you're still listening. See,
I didn't known how to do that. And today that
man is I think, wasn't that much interest stuff? You
(13:24):
wanted to listen to you didn't have my neighbors. That
wasn't a St. Louis. There were plotting, robberies and all
kinds of stuff. I was living on a dirt road
in Graham, North Carolina, about homework on the back of
a shovel. We're talking about what look astery going to
hit next man. But I was annoyed when my mom
(13:45):
could pick up the phone and I used to hate that,
or when my younger brother would pick up the phone.
And imagine your neighbor doing it. Yeah, that was That's
what I'm saying. That was least in the same household.
That was family. So you look at me. Wait, were
just over fifty years old, and look how things have changed,
sharing telephones, your home with the neighborhood. My cat's chan
he's getting naked pictures on your phone. Now you can
(14:08):
take naked pictures with your phone. When I was a ball,
I won't see naked pictures that I looked through the
Sears and Roebuck catalog in the funderwear secsion. I went
to the Bible early. I'm telling you. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Speaker 6 (14:25):
So yeah, can you believe that lack of privacy? Said
the girl who's on Facebook.
Speaker 7 (14:32):
I'm sorry, y'all.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Y'all did have it. It was tougher times, hard times.
We were grateful. I walked to the school in snow
and rode my horse and good Wednesday morning. It is
(15:10):
the big show on the radio, and it's time for
dumb crooked news. Dumb crook stories leaning for newspapers and
wire services across America. And send him by you a
make sure listener. We've got a bunch of them the address.
We'll follow this report. At three am on a cold,
snowy evening in March, a Montana state trooper noticed a
(15:34):
car off the shoulder of the road. The officer discovered
a man passed out behind the wheel with an empty
vodka bottle beside him. When the trooper tapped on the
car's window, the man woke up, saw the flashing lights,
and hit the gas of the still running car. Though
the vehicle was stuck in the snow, the car's speedometer
reached almost fifty miles per hour. Having a sense of humor,
(15:57):
the trooper began jogging in place and yelled. The trunk
driver was taken into custody. He's still trying to figure
out had a cop managed to keep up with his
seating car. A fifty six year old Madison, Wisconsin woman
and her thirty eight year old neighbor got into a
(16:18):
major argument over the younger woman's dog, which the older
woman complained had been relieving itself in her yard for months.
By the time police arrived, the women had smeared each
other's cars with gennerous amounts of dog poopy. A woman
an Alliance, Ohio, landed in jail for repeatedly calling nine
to one one looking for a husband. When the dispatcher
(16:41):
told her she could be locked up for misuse of
the nine to one to one system, the woman replied,
let's do it.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
She spent three days in jail for the phone calls.
No word on whether she met any interesting men while
she was in there. And Appleton, Wisconsin man was arrested
for a drive by shooting at the home of his
ex girlfriend. The residents heard a gunshot and found broken
glass in the street in front of the house. The
thug forgot to roll down his window before he opened fire.
(17:11):
He was arrested the next day at a glass repair
shop where he was getting his car window replaced. A
Pittsburgh man who cost thirty thousand dollars in damages when
he plowed his car into the front of a Centegod
says the Lord made him do it. I'm not crazy
and I don't hear voices. I just got a feeling
(17:31):
sent by God to drive real fast. For some reason,
God couldnot be reached for comet dumb. Government news officials
in Hudson, New York, proudly unveiled a new wheelchair accessible
water fountain for the county courthouse. The fountain was part
of a settlement with the federal government to enforce the
Americans with Disabilities Act. One small hitch. The water fountain
(17:54):
was installed on the second floor of the courthouse, which
is accessible only by a set of stairs. In their defense,
officials explained that the fountain has lots of features for
handicapped people besides those in wheelchairs. In good work, an
employee of an Augusta, Georgia, clothing store was leaving work
after closing when he was approached by a man wearing
(18:15):
a scarf over his face. The mass man said, dropped
that money bag. When the employee did, the mass robber
grabbed it and ran away. It was a mighty disappointing robbery.
Police say the stolen it him was not the store's
night deposit, but an insulated bag the employee carries his
lunch to work. And finally, a Fresno, California man was
(18:40):
arrested for using his car to tear up the greens
at the Sierra Meadows Golf Club. Police said it was
easy to track the suspect down while he was in
the middle of digging dibbotts in the golf course. His
car's license plate fell of. If you have done Cook's
mail to dumb Cruk News, John Boynvilly p O Box
(19:03):
seventy six sixty three, Charlotte didn't see two eight two
four one or email anybody but me at the Big
Show dot com. It's a big show on your radio.
Thanks for joining us this morning.
Speaker 8 (19:19):
Hey, it's to the night you boy, Rick Flair, and
we're talking about the John Boyne Villa Big Show. I
say the Big Show, And every morning they'd be styling
and profiling.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Good morning, The Big Show is on the radio, all right,
tell you about this as official. According to scientific research,
the girls do get prettier at closing time, a theory
floated in many bars among guys for years well The
study was done on two hundred single bargeres between nine
(20:21):
pm and midnight. They were asked how attractive they found
members of the opposite sex in the room. As time passed,
the women's reports of the men's sexiness remained consistent. If
a woman found a man appealing at nine pm, say
she felt the same way at midnight. But for the men,
it was a very different experience. The later it got,
(20:43):
the more attractive men found the women.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Women rated as acceptable at nine became a fox by twelve.
And it wasn't the alcohol talking. It happened whether a
man had one drink or many drinks. Wow, it was.
Scientists concluded that men were so unconsciously interested in scoring
(21:07):
for the night that their opinions change to keep the
possibility open. Now I see the new issue of Dum magazine.
That's what's scientific about it. You know, it's not the alcohol,
it's the men. The men, so desperation problems no matter
whether you have one drink or many, so scientists occur.
(21:32):
Drink up. Come on to the big shows on you
a radio. All right, y'all ready to play this wordy
word game. Let's do it one eight hundred Big show
is your toll free line callers nine to ten. Y'all
(21:53):
will play with us next. Good morning, It is the
(22:20):
big show on the radio for your Wednesday. I had
everybody's head about the bad I'd like to get my
partner robbed up. All right, that's been a condessa. If
you're trying to rob me, that's not I'm in pump
you up, Tiger Serry rowls each other.
Speaker 9 (22:41):
I went.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
We got Donnie from Robertsdelle, Alabama. Good morning, Donnie wring.
Hey that boy you on team John Boy and Billy.
You're playing Nick out of Winterville, North Carolina. Good morning, Nick, Hey,
Good morning John Boy. Hey that bunny. You got tantainer
on your side. All right, boys, fine for the prize, Baggs.
Let's you was kind of contestants. We got ooh wow,
(23:05):
oh woah, wo woha wah words with the double O sound. Okay,
oh yeah, that's one, all right boys, Words with a
double O sound Judd means it really doesn't have to
have double o's in them. Here we go, all right,
Donnie and Nick welcome. All right, Donnie, words with a
(23:30):
double O sound me and you for the first thirty seconds.
Are you ready?
Speaker 9 (23:34):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Okay, starting to clotting. Now another word for spaghetti or pasta.
They're long and white. Yeah, alrighty uh, mother blank tell
you a nursery rhyme? Yeah, okay, all right. If you're
from Israel, you aren't.
Speaker 9 (23:52):
Don't.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Don't look for the letter, just sounds like it. If
you're from Israel, you are. This is your religion. Abraham
is your father the blank nation. Come on, man, you
got Jewish in the water. Did you get him down? Okay?
(24:13):
So through, that's all right, that's all right, heartbeat Jewish
at the buzzer? All right, who's up?
Speaker 3 (24:25):
All right?
Speaker 1 (24:30):
Nick? You and Hanson?
Speaker 6 (24:31):
Ready, Yo, When old people slobber, it's called what Okay,
just open Uh.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
If you're telling a lie, you're not telling the what
to tell the what.
Speaker 7 (24:49):
Not true?
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (24:52):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
This is a boat with barrels underneath him. No barrels.
Aren't eything floats in the water a wrap, No barrels,
believe it or not. He was trying to help. This
is a hard category if it seems like what kind
of hoo you get out there? All right?
Speaker 7 (25:12):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Oh a two score? So Donnie over Nick three to two.
After round one. Here we go, boys like bo all right, Donnie,
you and Billy ready go like a party boat.
Speaker 6 (25:30):
No, it's like big square that has two tanks that
hold it on top of the water. It's like the
kind of the kind of boat is a square looking
Now it's a square looking.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Boat at your party on.
Speaker 3 (25:41):
It's got the ooh sound in it.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Boom tug boat. No, it's not a tug boat. Still
does not have the oo sound.
Speaker 7 (25:53):
It's too late to give it away now, Jackie, all right,
good news.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Is we got to go back to Nick. All right,
who said that stupid? Now that's Donnie. Did you holler
that out?
Speaker 7 (26:18):
Nick?
Speaker 1 (26:18):
All right? So finally dawned on Nick. So it looks
like I didn't have that one. Good all right, Nick
and Tator, all you need is one to tie, and
he's gonna get that right off. So if you get
one more, let me sit the next thing.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
It's gonna be tough.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Yeah, alright, all right, Nick and Tator ready.
Speaker 7 (26:36):
Go say it? Nick you?
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Yes, all right?
Speaker 6 (26:42):
This is a This is a cartoon with the dog
and they solve mysteriests.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
No, no, it's not droopy. It's that the kids and
the meddling kids and they're in the machine.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
The dream machine.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
They solve, they solve mysteries and the dog. I'll go
you do you get ink on your arm?
Speaker 3 (27:04):
You get this?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
It's ink. I love you. I'm sorry, Nick, but I
thought I needed to kind of yell at you like
your mama. I think both of them need to yell. No,
there goes our. I went now, I went down the
Nick wins. All right, All right, Donnie, you came up
(27:28):
a little short on that one. Buddy. Don't put a scourage.
Don't try again. Thank you because you really screwed don
Thank you for listening, buddy. Nick. Look at you.
Speaker 7 (27:50):
Nick.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I'll turn you over the jacket. You'll get your info,
boy Joel Buddy on a big show. Good morning, The
Big show is on the radio. Time our classics been
in the morning. We'll take your request. We taking an
inside the room request this morning from Jeff Pillars. He's
been wanting to hear you Ford the burger bead Buffalo.
(28:14):
I remember hearing that when I before I ever met you,
guys man, I tell you what I say about that, Pillars.
This was back it was probably nineteen eighty one. This
was one of the first like recording basit me and
Billy did together. That's right. Well, alrighty he go, we'll
do it next. Good morning, the big shows on the radio.
(28:53):
All right, drive through, start getting on my village nurves.
The kind of date that spent with the sorry reference,
that's how you can tell it's thirty years old, all right?
Speaker 7 (29:06):
After knowing, Welcome to Burger Biggie. May I help you?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Uh yeah, let me have two burgers, two fries and please.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Okay, two burgers, two fries and a call. Would you
like that? In the name be you for the Burger
Biggie Buffalo fun glass? Uh no, no, Well, I know
it's only a medium and it costs as much as
a large, but you could keep the glass.
Speaker 3 (29:27):
I don't care for you.
Speaker 7 (29:28):
And by the way, the let the paint on the
glasses doesn't have any lead on it like you know
those other guys, do you know? In case you're you know,
I'm concerned about getting lead poisoning, I'm chewing on the glasses.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I'm not going to chew on the Buffalo Burger Bagie
fun glass.
Speaker 7 (29:42):
All right, Well I'm not either, sure, it's just that
a lot of parents are concerned. Yeah, well I'm not,
and you want us to be sure that everybody knows.
There's the paint. I don't would you like Would you
like an apple dumpling? We got cherry and blueberry too. No,
how about a Burger Biggie ice cream Sunday We've got
new Burger Biggie butter Brickle. It's really delicious. No oh no, no,
how about some Atari games? Nor we got misspac Man.
(30:06):
I don't want a river rate it's really good.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Look, I'm hungry here. I want a couple of burgers,
a couple of fries, and coke.
Speaker 7 (30:11):
All right, okay, a couple of burgers, a couple of fries.
Only one coke?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yes, one coke?
Speaker 7 (30:16):
How come you only want one coke? You want two
of everything else.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I'm not that Thursday. I don't drink that much when
I eat o caake.
Speaker 7 (30:21):
Are you gonna eat all this yourself?
Speaker 5 (30:23):
Yes?
Speaker 7 (30:23):
Two Buffalo burgers and two orders fries?
Speaker 5 (30:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (30:26):
I don't want to alarm me, sir, but there's an
awful I've salt in this food and some chemicals too.
We know we never recommend that people eat Burger Biggie
food every every day.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I don't eat Burger Bgie food every day.
Speaker 7 (30:39):
Well, we just don't recommend you eat more than one
burger at the time.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
Hey, I want two burger diabetic, I'm not down.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
I want two burgers, two fries, and a coke.
Speaker 7 (30:47):
Okay, sir, that that's that's up to you. I it's
ability for Are you gonna eat that here?
Speaker 1 (30:53):
I'm in the drive through window, man, I'm going to go.
I'm gonna eat it here.
Speaker 7 (30:56):
Well, I thought you might want to come in here
for the Burger Biggie Buffalo. He's going to be here
in a few minutes. I know he's going to have
some free Buffalo Burger certificates. I'm some fry certificates. I
don't hearl of those tickets too. I don't care.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
I don't want to see Beauford the Buffalo Burger Bgie.
Speaker 7 (31:14):
It's Bedford de Burger Biggie.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
But whatever. I don't want to see you. I want
my food and I want to go.
Speaker 7 (31:19):
Okay, Well, Beauford is here, sir, and he he he
says he wants to speak to you.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Oh, for goodness, I don't believe all mody and all yours,
old Beauford Buffo. Ol be you for rd be.
Speaker 7 (31:34):
You old.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
Gifer.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
Put the guy back on the speaker. I want my food.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I want to go.
Speaker 7 (31:45):
Good sir? Are you you touch two burgers?
Speaker 3 (31:50):
For Just forget it, man, all right, just forget it.
You and Beuford, just just go.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I'm you.
Speaker 7 (31:54):
I'll only give you one code.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
I forget it.
Speaker 7 (31:57):
Really, I hate working.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
Good morning, everybody.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
You got a big show on the radio. Jumbo tay there,
Stevie ain't out here with red the jacket boy.
Speaker 10 (32:30):
All right, hey man, this is listen to story fillers
gave me. Y'all, y'all got to hear it.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
This from Northwest Florida Daily News the story of a
Crestview couple who drove their car to Walmart, only to
have a car break down in the parking lot. The
man told his wife carry on with a shopping while
he fixed the car in the lot. Well, the rife
came back later, saw a small group of people near
the car, and closer inspection, she saw a pair of
male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man
(33:06):
was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts
into glaringly public ones. So say, goodness, he's under the car.
He's wearing short legs ticking out in his privates. There,
go ahead, Tater love stories like this. So his lack
of underpants, okay, was I so private parts there? Unable
(33:30):
to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put
her hand up his shorts and tucked everything back into place. Oh,
she regained her face. She stepped back up, looked across
the hood and saw her husband, who was standing iply
by the mechanic. However, had to have three stitches sewn
(33:55):
into his forehead. Rendon said, he's seen this before, and
I hadn't heard this. Supposially a true story FBI agent's
rate of a psychiatric hospital San Diego under investigation for
medical insurance fraud, and after hours of reviewing thousands of
(34:16):
medical records of dozens of agents, had worked up an appetite.
So the agent in charge called in nearby pizza parlor
with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.
And this is the actual telephone conversation that took place
and was recorded by the FBI because they were taking
all conversations at the hospital. All right, so I say,
(34:36):
before you read this, I just went to snoops, the
source for finding NFL. These sort of things are true
or not, Snape says, this is a true story. Okay,
all right, so FBI okay, age right here. It is
FBI agent. Hello, I'd like to order nineteen large pizzas
and three cases of soda, Pizza man, and where would
you like them delivered? We're over at the psychiatric hospital,
(34:59):
the psychiat hospital. That's right. I'm an FBI agent. You're
an FBI agent. That's correct. Just about everybody here is.
And you're at the psychiatric hospital, that's correct. And make
sure you don't go through the front doors. We have
them locked. You'll have to go around to the back
of service entrance to deliver the pieces. And you say,
you're all FBI agents. That's right. How soon can you
(35:21):
have them here? Everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an
FBI agent. That's right. We've been here all day and
we're starving. So how are you going to pay for
all this? We collected a pool of cash and you're
all FBI agents, yes, with guns, that's right. Now, can
you remember to bring the pizzas and sold us to
the service entrants in the rear? We have the front
(35:43):
doors locked. Pizza Man, no way. Wow, And you've never
heard that story?
Speaker 7 (35:52):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Wow, let me play you a little something right here. Hey,
this is pretty cool right here. Listen, is FBI agents
conducted at a psychiatric hospital than San Diego, those under
investigation for medical insurance bro. So after hours of we're
doing thousands of medical records there, dozens of agents had
worked up an appetite. Never before he thinks, he thinks
sometimes we're just giving him a hard time.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
About you actually flat back for what.
Speaker 1 (36:16):
I'm gonna start calling you people. Were you the one
making the call?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
I think you're the guy who introduced Rayford with If
y'all didn't hear this the first five hundred times, I'm.
Speaker 6 (36:30):
Telling you, he's about two years away from being able
to hide his own Easter eggs.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
I ain't got time to listen to what I'm saying.
I'm busy. Oh bless you.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
Let me hear it again. You told it so good.
You want to hear them so good? I want to
hear it all.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
This is pretty cool right here. Listen to this.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Fine, let's get it.
Speaker 6 (37:06):
But big boxes here all your favorites from four decades
of The Big Show, ninety nine since each fifteen for
nine ninety nine, by them once, play them anywhere You
can shop the billbox online right now at the Big
Show dot Com.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Order Big Show Stuff I phone.
Speaker 6 (37:17):
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one
Stuff Online services by Enemy dot com.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
If you missed any of the Big Show this morning
and you can hear now the John Boymilly Late Risers
podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast, make it
easy subscribe to us will the Free I heard way
to go out, see you tomorrow. We love you, we
made it
Good Wedness morning, and you got a big show on
your radio. Alrighty, let's welcome brand new big show sponsor.
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Hair Salon, Millsburg's newest boutique where the shekh go to
get on fleek. Doodle's Hair Salon isn't one of those
mass production haircutteries with two dozen stylists and only six
different haircuts to choose from. Doodles herself does each and
every single haircut, right, Doodles, get the chair and I'll
(01:22):
get each one with Doodle's trademark personal touch just.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
A little off the top. What the hell is this?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
The next and.
Speaker 4 (01:34):
Doodle's Hair Salon is fully liquor licensed by the state
and the bar is always open.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
You are you are a little no thank you. I'll
just have word more good our seconds all right? Oh still,
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are you okay to do this? You shut your mom.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
My gear flat is the d go All the kids
are getting that?
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How about that we do parents, poms, mullets, scullets, roosters, afros, whole, froze,
mohaff bro hof, ho hoff, high, fade, low fade, bull cut,
buzz cut, crew cut, butch cut, butch, cassidy butch, Patrick, Patrick, Stewart,
pie and tight low and loose, bob bob nab page
boy choir boy, chorus boy, bufont, juwfont, ducktail, schmucktail, pixie cut,
dixie cut, flat top, round top, tippy top, comb over
(02:36):
comb under, beehives, burn.
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Nest, Princess Leah.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
And even that stupid fluck of seagulls hairdoo that you
used to wear and get your ass kicked by Girl
Scout Troop forty three and you had to buy a
lifetime supply of dosy nose in order to get your
retainer back.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Nice haircut, dicky boy.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Ha ha, and how friends doodles hairon is unlike any
place you've ever been. We cater to your every whim.
We even have our very old messus on staff. Just
ask for old man hands curry hold on, no, Nah,
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(03:27):
just off Sweeney Todd Boulevard, across from the offices of
James S. Murray, Pet Cremation and Grandparent Divorce. Doodle's Hair Salon.
Put your head in her hands, Ah Daria, remember the
name friends, Doodle's Hair Salon. This is your old pal
Burtfern saying I'll see you there.
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Get your hair.
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Cut anyway you walk and Doodle's hair Soalon, Get your
hair cut anyway you walk at Doodle's Hair Solam, we'll
get give you a perm or shorten the back, even
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Hair at the top of your crack.
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Get your hair cut anyway you want a Doodle's hair salon.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
What's happening? What's guy? The Rabbi Shlomo here listen there.
Speaker 5 (04:22):
Then I'm in the kitchen ripping up some crip locks
or shot get filthy fish.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
Or a big part of those hurt and schlaping shaking.
Speaker 5 (04:33):
Nothing keeps a smile on my face like listening to
my favorite schlamel and shlumozle John Boy and Billy down
regular hush and Fee Incorporated.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
See you guys on headecks. Huh what's that like?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Good morning, you got a big show on the radio.
Well you guys over fifty, you know what we're talking about.
Say you got to get a colonoscopy. Uh, pillers, you
just had one recently that it's been a couple of years,
but it still uh well uh, this doctor said, these
(05:44):
are actual comments made. You're the exam when when they
were doing the col because you're conscious, right, Well I was,
and then I started I kept talking. They shut me
up by give me another shot.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
Proper file, and I was out.
Speaker 6 (06:00):
You said, last thing you saw was like, hey, I'm
still awake, And she got rid in the face and
said nighty night and.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Par thumb click the button and that was it. A
physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by
his patience, predominantly male, while he was performing there colonoscamy. Yeah,
ah right here, that's all good colony music. Take it easy, doc.
(06:30):
You're boldly going where no man is gone before. Find
a milia ere heart yet, can you hear me?
Speaker 7 (06:38):
Now?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Are we there yet? Are we there yet? You know?
Arkansas would now be legally married. Things said during a
colonoscomy any sign of a trapped miner's chief, you put
your left hand in you.
Speaker 8 (07:00):
Take your.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
Sounds more poky than Hey. Now I know how a
muppet feels. If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit. Hey, doc,
let me know if you find my dignity. You used
to be an executive at n Ronde. We just talked
about it. Now I know why I'm not gay. The
(07:29):
last actual statement made growing up Colonoscomy. Get better at
if we walk?
Speaker 3 (07:35):
Sure you are?
Speaker 1 (07:37):
Could you write a note for my wife saying that
my head is not up there? Good morning is a
big show on the radio. It is Kernavan's quiz time
biddle what we're dealing with? Technology news? Microsoft says no
(07:58):
to Parno on your mobile phone. All right, one eight hundred.
Big show you told free line call on up for
you the right caller, Jackie. Let you know you take
C and you win.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
Next.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
Good Wednesday morning, got a big showing a ready to
go That girl spell qualified, Oh Shay, jan call Wills,
It's time color quiz. Jane sat Hey to Mary from Leesburg, Pennsylvania.
(08:52):
Hello Mary, good morning. There's something about Mary that you
don't knowh tell us something we don't know about you. Mary,
I got brown eyes by brown Eyed Girl. You know
everything is not a sort of keep's I singing about it?
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Alright?
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Mary, thank you baby? Hang on, listen to Billy and
Windows Prize package. Well.
Speaker 6 (09:19):
Last month, Apple removed all products to feature nudity and
adult oriented content from their iPhone app store and poll
customers if you want porn by a different phone now.
Microsoft has also joined the no nipples bandwagon, announcing that
their upcoming version of their Windows phone will also be
what they call a porn free zone. Some observers are
(09:43):
saying Microsoft's no porn policy is a mistake because A
it makes them just like Apple, b censorship is wrong,
or c if you want to screw yourself, it's hard
to be buying something with Microsoft.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
Un What say, Mary, I gotta take sea on.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
I know I sound old, but remember the good old
days on the phone. You'd call somebody and they could
call you right now, and if there was part and
it was like it was live. Yeah. Would you just
have party lines when you listen in? You have those
as a kid. I had those as a kid. Oh yeah,
you have to phone somebody else? Is talking on them. Yeah, weird.
You have to ask your neighbor. Can I make a
(10:30):
phone call? I never to hear it? Pick up John,
Jesus keeping what are you eighty? Hey Mary?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Where do you go? Baby? Thank you?
Speaker 5 (10:43):
Can I get a shot out?
Speaker 1 (10:44):
You sure can? I'd like to say hi to Elizabeth
and Nathan. Well, all right, you just did appreciate you
and yours up in Pennsylvani you're listening to the Big Show.
Thank you, good morning. You got the Big Show on
the radio.
Speaker 9 (10:58):
Hey, that's that's your old Pelgart And I'm not working
a lot over abusey Nissan or working the friar over
abusive burghers Colin Gaylord Sartage two in the morning to
sing body holotoones. I'm listening to my favorite fellow head
injury patience John by Don every morning on the Big Show. Man.
(11:22):
When was the last time I had hand?
Speaker 1 (11:57):
Good morning? It's on Wednesday to beg show was on radio.
I tell you I wasn't calling you bugle eyed. I
didn't mean to be so facial when you go wait,
talk about picking up the phone and somebody order to
be telling me, don't it not? Just a little over
Tater's young head about that. I know about three way calling,
and they used to do that and be quiet while
(12:18):
they were talking about me on the other line. There
weren't enough lines, so you had to share them with
other people in the neighborhood. That sounds frustrating. It was
what if you had a Gabby person in the neighborhood? Oh, yeah,
like me? Well you remember Mayberry? Where did where did
everybody would let the sisters talk on Sunday afternoon to
catch up? Yeah, Malcolm from Charlotte was there. There are
(12:41):
men orb the whole town shuts down, so two ladies
can talk about their feet falling asleep? Order what causes that?
Speaker 3 (12:53):
Oh, that's what it was.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And I think maybe we had like three household sharing
a LDIA. I mean, you know this is when I
was real young, know.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
I mean, you have meetings, how'd you organize it?
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Well? No, you know, when somebody's using phone pick up
all the sorry sorry catches catch can Yeah, well they
finished in a minute. Then then the art was having
them think you hung up while you're still listening. See,
I didn't known how to do that. And today that
man is I think, wasn't that much interest stuff? You
(13:24):
wanted to listen to you didn't have my neighbors. That
wasn't a St. Louis. There were plotting, robberies and all
kinds of stuff. I was living on a dirt road
in Graham, North Carolina, about homework on the back of
a shovel. We're talking about what look astery going to
hit next man. But I was annoyed when my mom
(13:45):
could pick up the phone and I used to hate that,
or when my younger brother would pick up the phone.
And imagine your neighbor doing it. Yeah, that was That's
what I'm saying. That was least in the same household.
That was family. So you look at me. Wait, were
just over fifty years old, and look how things have changed,
sharing telephones, your home with the neighborhood. My cat's chan
he's getting naked pictures on your phone. Now you can
(14:08):
take naked pictures with your phone. When I was a ball,
I won't see naked pictures that I looked through the
Sears and Roebuck catalog in the funderwear secsion. I went
to the Bible early. I'm telling you. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Speaker 6 (14:25):
So yeah, can you believe that lack of privacy? Said
the girl who's on Facebook.
Speaker 7 (14:32):
I'm sorry, y'all.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
Y'all did have it. It was tougher times, hard times.
We were grateful. I walked to the school in snow
and rode my horse and good Wednesday morning. It is
(15:10):
the big show on the radio, and it's time for
dumb crooked news. Dumb crook stories leaning for newspapers and
wire services across America. And send him by you a
make sure listener. We've got a bunch of them the address.
We'll follow this report. At three am on a cold,
snowy evening in March, a Montana state trooper noticed a
(15:34):
car off the shoulder of the road. The officer discovered
a man passed out behind the wheel with an empty
vodka bottle beside him. When the trooper tapped on the
car's window, the man woke up, saw the flashing lights,
and hit the gas of the still running car. Though
the vehicle was stuck in the snow, the car's speedometer
reached almost fifty miles per hour. Having a sense of humor,
(15:57):
the trooper began jogging in place and yelled. The trunk
driver was taken into custody. He's still trying to figure
out had a cop managed to keep up with his
seating car. A fifty six year old Madison, Wisconsin woman
and her thirty eight year old neighbor got into a
(16:18):
major argument over the younger woman's dog, which the older
woman complained had been relieving itself in her yard for months.
By the time police arrived, the women had smeared each
other's cars with gennerous amounts of dog poopy. A woman
an Alliance, Ohio, landed in jail for repeatedly calling nine
to one one looking for a husband. When the dispatcher
(16:41):
told her she could be locked up for misuse of
the nine to one to one system, the woman replied,
let's do it.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
She spent three days in jail for the phone calls.
No word on whether she met any interesting men while
she was in there. And Appleton, Wisconsin man was arrested
for a drive by shooting at the home of his
ex girlfriend. The residents heard a gunshot and found broken
glass in the street in front of the house. The
thug forgot to roll down his window before he opened fire.
(17:11):
He was arrested the next day at a glass repair
shop where he was getting his car window replaced. A
Pittsburgh man who cost thirty thousand dollars in damages when
he plowed his car into the front of a Centegod
says the Lord made him do it. I'm not crazy
and I don't hear voices. I just got a feeling
(17:31):
sent by God to drive real fast. For some reason,
God couldnot be reached for comet dumb. Government news officials
in Hudson, New York, proudly unveiled a new wheelchair accessible
water fountain for the county courthouse. The fountain was part
of a settlement with the federal government to enforce the
Americans with Disabilities Act. One small hitch. The water fountain
(17:54):
was installed on the second floor of the courthouse, which
is accessible only by a set of stairs. In their defense,
officials explained that the fountain has lots of features for
handicapped people besides those in wheelchairs. In good work, an
employee of an Augusta, Georgia, clothing store was leaving work
after closing when he was approached by a man wearing
(18:15):
a scarf over his face. The mass man said, dropped
that money bag. When the employee did, the mass robber
grabbed it and ran away. It was a mighty disappointing robbery.
Police say the stolen it him was not the store's
night deposit, but an insulated bag the employee carries his
lunch to work. And finally, a Fresno, California man was
(18:40):
arrested for using his car to tear up the greens
at the Sierra Meadows Golf Club. Police said it was
easy to track the suspect down while he was in
the middle of digging dibbotts in the golf course. His
car's license plate fell of. If you have done Cook's
mail to dumb Cruk News, John Boynvilly p O Box
(19:03):
seventy six sixty three, Charlotte didn't see two eight two
four one or email anybody but me at the Big
Show dot com. It's a big show on your radio.
Thanks for joining us this morning.
Speaker 8 (19:19):
Hey, it's to the night you boy, Rick Flair, and
we're talking about the John Boyne Villa Big Show. I
say the Big Show, And every morning they'd be styling
and profiling.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Good morning, The Big Show is on the radio, all right,
tell you about this as official. According to scientific research,
the girls do get prettier at closing time, a theory
floated in many bars among guys for years well The
study was done on two hundred single bargeres between nine
(20:21):
pm and midnight. They were asked how attractive they found
members of the opposite sex in the room. As time passed,
the women's reports of the men's sexiness remained consistent. If
a woman found a man appealing at nine pm, say
she felt the same way at midnight. But for the men,
it was a very different experience. The later it got,
(20:43):
the more attractive men found the women.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Women rated as acceptable at nine became a fox by twelve.
And it wasn't the alcohol talking. It happened whether a
man had one drink or many drinks. Wow, it was.
Scientists concluded that men were so unconsciously interested in scoring
(21:07):
for the night that their opinions change to keep the
possibility open. Now I see the new issue of Dum magazine.
That's what's scientific about it. You know, it's not the alcohol,
it's the men. The men, so desperation problems no matter
whether you have one drink or many, so scientists occur.
(21:32):
Drink up. Come on to the big shows on you
a radio. All right, y'all ready to play this wordy
word game. Let's do it one eight hundred Big show
is your toll free line callers nine to ten. Y'all
(21:53):
will play with us next. Good morning, It is the
(22:20):
big show on the radio for your Wednesday. I had
everybody's head about the bad I'd like to get my
partner robbed up. All right, that's been a condessa. If
you're trying to rob me, that's not I'm in pump
you up, Tiger Serry rowls each other.
Speaker 9 (22:41):
I went.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
We got Donnie from Robertsdelle, Alabama. Good morning, Donnie wring.
Hey that boy you on team John Boy and Billy.
You're playing Nick out of Winterville, North Carolina. Good morning, Nick, Hey,
Good morning John Boy. Hey that bunny. You got tantainer
on your side. All right, boys, fine for the prize, Baggs.
Let's you was kind of contestants. We got ooh wow,
(23:05):
oh woah, wo woha wah words with the double O sound. Okay,
oh yeah, that's one, all right boys, Words with a
double O sound Judd means it really doesn't have to
have double o's in them. Here we go, all right,
Donnie and Nick welcome. All right, Donnie, words with a
(23:30):
double O sound me and you for the first thirty seconds.
Are you ready?
Speaker 9 (23:34):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Okay, starting to clotting. Now another word for spaghetti or pasta.
They're long and white. Yeah, alrighty uh, mother blank tell
you a nursery rhyme? Yeah, okay, all right. If you're
from Israel, you aren't.
Speaker 9 (23:52):
Don't.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Don't look for the letter, just sounds like it. If
you're from Israel, you are. This is your religion. Abraham
is your father the blank nation. Come on, man, you
got Jewish in the water. Did you get him down? Okay?
(24:13):
So through, that's all right, that's all right, heartbeat Jewish
at the buzzer? All right, who's up?
Speaker 3 (24:25):
All right?
Speaker 1 (24:30):
Nick? You and Hanson?
Speaker 6 (24:31):
Ready, Yo, When old people slobber, it's called what Okay,
just open Uh.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
If you're telling a lie, you're not telling the what
to tell the what.
Speaker 7 (24:49):
Not true?
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Yeah?
Speaker 7 (24:52):
Uh.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
This is a boat with barrels underneath him. No barrels.
Aren't eything floats in the water a wrap, No barrels,
believe it or not. He was trying to help. This
is a hard category if it seems like what kind
of hoo you get out there? All right?
Speaker 7 (25:12):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (25:12):
Oh a two score? So Donnie over Nick three to two.
After round one. Here we go, boys like bo all right, Donnie,
you and Billy ready go like a party boat.
Speaker 6 (25:30):
No, it's like big square that has two tanks that
hold it on top of the water. It's like the
kind of the kind of boat is a square looking
Now it's a square looking.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Boat at your party on.
Speaker 3 (25:41):
It's got the ooh sound in it.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
Boom tug boat. No, it's not a tug boat. Still
does not have the oo sound.
Speaker 7 (25:53):
It's too late to give it away now, Jackie, all right,
good news.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Is we got to go back to Nick. All right,
who said that stupid? Now that's Donnie. Did you holler
that out?
Speaker 7 (26:18):
Nick?
Speaker 1 (26:18):
All right? So finally dawned on Nick. So it looks
like I didn't have that one. Good all right, Nick
and Tator, all you need is one to tie, and
he's gonna get that right off. So if you get
one more, let me sit the next thing.
Speaker 3 (26:31):
It's gonna be tough.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Yeah, alright, all right, Nick and Tator ready.
Speaker 7 (26:36):
Go say it? Nick you?
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Yes, all right?
Speaker 6 (26:42):
This is a This is a cartoon with the dog
and they solve mysteriests.
Speaker 1 (26:49):
No, no, it's not droopy. It's that the kids and
the meddling kids and they're in the machine.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
The dream machine.
Speaker 1 (26:56):
They solve, they solve mysteries and the dog. I'll go
you do you get ink on your arm?
Speaker 3 (27:04):
You get this?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
It's ink. I love you. I'm sorry, Nick, but I
thought I needed to kind of yell at you like
your mama. I think both of them need to yell. No,
there goes our. I went now, I went down the
Nick wins. All right, All right, Donnie, you came up
(27:28):
a little short on that one. Buddy. Don't put a scourage.
Don't try again. Thank you because you really screwed don
Thank you for listening, buddy. Nick. Look at you.
Speaker 7 (27:50):
Nick.
Speaker 1 (27:51):
I'll turn you over the jacket. You'll get your info,
boy Joel Buddy on a big show. Good morning, The
Big show is on the radio. Time our classics been
in the morning. We'll take your request. We taking an
inside the room request this morning from Jeff Pillars. He's
been wanting to hear you Ford the burger bead Buffalo.
(28:14):
I remember hearing that when I before I ever met you,
guys man, I tell you what I say about that, Pillars.
This was back it was probably nineteen eighty one. This
was one of the first like recording basit me and
Billy did together. That's right. Well, alrighty he go, we'll
do it next. Good morning, the big shows on the radio.
(28:53):
All right, drive through, start getting on my village nurves.
The kind of date that spent with the sorry reference,
that's how you can tell it's thirty years old, all right?
Speaker 7 (29:06):
After knowing, Welcome to Burger Biggie. May I help you?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Uh yeah, let me have two burgers, two fries and please.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Okay, two burgers, two fries and a call. Would you
like that? In the name be you for the Burger
Biggie Buffalo fun glass? Uh no, no, Well, I know
it's only a medium and it costs as much as
a large, but you could keep the glass.
Speaker 3 (29:27):
I don't care for you.
Speaker 7 (29:28):
And by the way, the let the paint on the
glasses doesn't have any lead on it like you know
those other guys, do you know? In case you're you know,
I'm concerned about getting lead poisoning, I'm chewing on the glasses.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I'm not going to chew on the Buffalo Burger Bagie
fun glass.
Speaker 7 (29:42):
All right, Well I'm not either, sure, it's just that
a lot of parents are concerned. Yeah, well I'm not,
and you want us to be sure that everybody knows.
There's the paint. I don't would you like Would you
like an apple dumpling? We got cherry and blueberry too. No,
how about a Burger Biggie ice cream Sunday We've got
new Burger Biggie butter Brickle. It's really delicious. No oh no, no,
how about some Atari games? Nor we got misspac Man.
(30:06):
I don't want a river rate it's really good.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
Look, I'm hungry here. I want a couple of burgers,
a couple of fries, and coke.
Speaker 7 (30:11):
All right, okay, a couple of burgers, a couple of fries.
Only one coke?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Yes, one coke?
Speaker 7 (30:16):
How come you only want one coke? You want two
of everything else.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I'm not that Thursday. I don't drink that much when
I eat o caake.
Speaker 7 (30:21):
Are you gonna eat all this yourself?
Speaker 5 (30:23):
Yes?
Speaker 7 (30:23):
Two Buffalo burgers and two orders fries?
Speaker 5 (30:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (30:26):
I don't want to alarm me, sir, but there's an
awful I've salt in this food and some chemicals too.
We know we never recommend that people eat Burger Biggie
food every every day.
Speaker 3 (30:36):
I don't eat Burger Bgie food every day.
Speaker 7 (30:39):
Well, we just don't recommend you eat more than one
burger at the time.
Speaker 1 (30:41):
Hey, I want two burger diabetic, I'm not down.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
I want two burgers, two fries, and a coke.
Speaker 7 (30:47):
Okay, sir, that that's that's up to you. I it's
ability for Are you gonna eat that here?
Speaker 1 (30:53):
I'm in the drive through window, man, I'm going to go.
I'm gonna eat it here.
Speaker 7 (30:56):
Well, I thought you might want to come in here
for the Burger Biggie Buffalo. He's going to be here
in a few minutes. I know he's going to have
some free Buffalo Burger certificates. I'm some fry certificates. I
don't hearl of those tickets too. I don't care.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
I don't want to see Beauford the Buffalo Burger Bgie.
Speaker 7 (31:14):
It's Bedford de Burger Biggie.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
But whatever. I don't want to see you. I want
my food and I want to go.
Speaker 7 (31:19):
Okay, Well, Beauford is here, sir, and he he he
says he wants to speak to you.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Oh, for goodness, I don't believe all mody and all yours,
old Beauford Buffo. Ol be you for rd be.
Speaker 7 (31:34):
You old.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
Gifer.
Speaker 3 (31:39):
Put the guy back on the speaker. I want my food.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
I want to go.
Speaker 7 (31:45):
Good sir? Are you you touch two burgers?
Speaker 3 (31:50):
For Just forget it, man, all right, just forget it.
You and Beuford, just just go.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
I'm you.
Speaker 7 (31:54):
I'll only give you one code.
Speaker 3 (31:56):
I forget it.
Speaker 7 (31:57):
Really, I hate working.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
Good morning, everybody.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
You got a big show on the radio. Jumbo tay there,
Stevie ain't out here with red the jacket boy.
Speaker 10 (32:30):
All right, hey man, this is listen to story fillers
gave me. Y'all, y'all got to hear it.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
This from Northwest Florida Daily News the story of a
Crestview couple who drove their car to Walmart, only to
have a car break down in the parking lot. The
man told his wife carry on with a shopping while
he fixed the car in the lot. Well, the rife
came back later, saw a small group of people near
the car, and closer inspection, she saw a pair of
male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man
(33:06):
was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts
into glaringly public ones. So say, goodness, he's under the car.
He's wearing short legs ticking out in his privates. There,
go ahead, Tater love stories like this. So his lack
of underpants, okay, was I so private parts there? Unable
(33:30):
to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put
her hand up his shorts and tucked everything back into place. Oh,
she regained her face. She stepped back up, looked across
the hood and saw her husband, who was standing iply
by the mechanic. However, had to have three stitches sewn
(33:55):
into his forehead. Rendon said, he's seen this before, and
I hadn't heard this. Supposially a true story FBI agent's
rate of a psychiatric hospital San Diego under investigation for
medical insurance fraud, and after hours of reviewing thousands of
(34:16):
medical records of dozens of agents, had worked up an appetite.
So the agent in charge called in nearby pizza parlor
with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.
And this is the actual telephone conversation that took place
and was recorded by the FBI because they were taking
all conversations at the hospital. All right, so I say,
(34:36):
before you read this, I just went to snoops, the
source for finding NFL. These sort of things are true
or not, Snape says, this is a true story. Okay,
all right, so FBI okay, age right here. It is
FBI agent. Hello, I'd like to order nineteen large pizzas
and three cases of soda, Pizza man, and where would
you like them delivered? We're over at the psychiatric hospital,
(34:59):
the psychiat hospital. That's right. I'm an FBI agent. You're
an FBI agent. That's correct. Just about everybody here is.
And you're at the psychiatric hospital, that's correct. And make
sure you don't go through the front doors. We have
them locked. You'll have to go around to the back
of service entrance to deliver the pieces. And you say,
you're all FBI agents. That's right. How soon can you
(35:21):
have them here? Everyone at the psychiatric hospital is an
FBI agent. That's right. We've been here all day and
we're starving. So how are you going to pay for
all this? We collected a pool of cash and you're
all FBI agents, yes, with guns, that's right. Now, can
you remember to bring the pizzas and sold us to
the service entrants in the rear? We have the front
(35:43):
doors locked. Pizza Man, no way. Wow, And you've never
heard that story?
Speaker 7 (35:52):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Wow, let me play you a little something right here. Hey,
this is pretty cool right here. Listen, is FBI agents
conducted at a psychiatric hospital than San Diego, those under
investigation for medical insurance bro. So after hours of we're
doing thousands of medical records there, dozens of agents had
worked up an appetite. Never before he thinks, he thinks
sometimes we're just giving him a hard time.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
About you actually flat back for what.
Speaker 1 (36:16):
I'm gonna start calling you people. Were you the one
making the call?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
I think you're the guy who introduced Rayford with If
y'all didn't hear this the first five hundred times, I'm.
Speaker 6 (36:30):
Telling you, he's about two years away from being able
to hide his own Easter eggs.
Speaker 1 (36:38):
I ain't got time to listen to what I'm saying.
I'm busy. Oh bless you.
Speaker 3 (36:47):
Let me hear it again. You told it so good.
You want to hear them so good? I want to
hear it all.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
This is pretty cool right here. Listen to this.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Fine, let's get it.
Speaker 6 (37:06):
But big boxes here all your favorites from four decades
of The Big Show, ninety nine since each fifteen for
nine ninety nine, by them once, play them anywhere You
can shop the billbox online right now at the Big
Show dot Com.
Speaker 1 (37:16):
Order Big Show Stuff I phone.
Speaker 6 (37:17):
The number is eight hundred and four to seven one
Stuff Online services by Enemy dot com.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
If you missed any of the Big Show this morning
and you can hear now the John Boymilly Late Risers
podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast, make it
easy subscribe to us will the Free I heard way
to go out, see you tomorrow. We love you, we
made it
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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