Seeing Other People

Missing someone after a breakup can make you question everything. Did you make a mistake? Does still loving them mean you should try again? And if nobody else compares, does that mean they were actually your person? In this solo episode, I’m talking about why missing someone doesn’t mean you should be together, how nostalgia can make us forget why things ended, and how to tell the difference between genuinely wanting so...

Erica Shea is back on Seeing Other People, and this time she’s married. After years of dating, heartbreak, situationships, and wondering if she was ever going to find her person, Erica is now on the other side of the story—and realizing that finding your person is only the beginning. We talk about what it feels like to finally have the life you spent so much time hoping for, why she wishes she could tell her younger sel...

This week, we’re catching up on life lately. We talk baby registry overwhelm, the stroller we think we’re getting, football season, the best things we ate this week, and how different our lives will look this time next year. Plus, Ilana’s newest obsession, getting ahead before maternity leave, and what we’ve been watching and reading.

Chapters:

00:00 UPPAbaby vs. Bugaboo

02:40 Life lately

04:30 Gratitudes

07:00 I...

Harry is back for his fourth appearance on Seeing Other People, and this time he's on camera for the first time. He just turned 35, his younger brother got engaged, and the feeling that everyone around you is hitting milestones while you're still out here going on first dates? We get into all of it. How do you make peace with being on a completely different timeline than your friends, your siblings, even your parents? How do you ke...

Najwa Zebian, author of The One Who Broke You Can’t Heal You, joins the podcast for a conversation about heartbreak, healing, and what it really means to move on when someone has hurt you. We talk about why the person who broke you can’t be the one to heal you, why closure is a myth, and how waiting for an apology, an explanation, or someone’s regret can keep you stuck. Najwa shares what it looks like to take your...

Jake spent the weekend hosting a fantasy football draft while Barkley lived his best boys day and paid for it later, and Ilana went to her first pregnancy brand event and is currently dealing with back pain that she describes as someone stabbing her. Also: Ilana read two books in a week, including Hayden Panettiere's memoir and Michelle Obama's Becoming, and somehow still can't remember Garrett Wilson's name. Three listener questio...

What do you do when you and your partner have different ideal timelines 3 years into your relationship? How to be less anxious after a great date? I’m answering your questions about relationship timelines, rejection texts, dating anxiety vs. chemistry, and surviving the first trimester. Plus, I’m reacting to the most unhinged marriage advice you’ve ever received and sharing why I’m seriously missing marathon...

Serena Kerrigan, founder of Let’s Fucking Date and author of Let’s Fcking Date*, joins the podcast for a long-overdue reunion — five years after she was one of the first guests on Seeing Other People. We talk about why modern dating needs a new rulebook, how to stop dating from a place of scarcity, why rejection doesn’t mean something is wrong with you, and what it looks like to actually trust yourself and m...

We’re back with a LOT to catch up on after another Jonas Brothers concert. We’re sharing what went down at MSG, why our entire section was rooting for us, and how we felt when it didn’t happen. Then, I’m sharing a big update about the future of Seeing Other People, what “maternity leave” looks like when you work for yourself, and what changes you can expect to see in the SOP world. Plus, I’...

Isabelle Surielow, PhD candidate, matchmaker, and relationship consultant, joins the podcast to unpack what it really means to find love — and why sometimes the search for a relationship is actually a search for ourselves. We talk about dating with intention, why knowing what you want matters, the difference between standards and preferences, and how focusing on how you want to feel in a relationship can completely change the...

Mika Ross, therapist and relationship coach, joins the podcast to talk about the parts of relationships nobody teaches you until you’re already in one. We talk about what it actually takes to build a healthy relationship beyond chemistry and compatibility, why communication is so much more complicated than “just talk about it,” and how to navigate conflict without letting resentment build.

Mika also shares practica...

It’s Ilana’s birthday weekend, the Jets are (almost) back, and somehow the Jonas Brothers might be helping us reveal our baby’s gender?! We’re talking about how our very unserious idea turned into a viral campaign that actually got Joe and Kevin Jonas’ attention, plus birthday plans, the weird guilt of posting on social media when you haven’t texted people back, and a conversation about choosing ...

This week I'm answering seven listener questions, and somehow they all circle back to the same underlying thing: learning which feelings you can actually trust. I get into why not missing someone might mean secure instead of anxious, why every breakup doesn't mean you failed, and what it means when someone checks every box but still makes you feel unseen. I also cover the line between healthy compromise and quietly disappearing int...

Kelly Ehlers, award-winning founder, writer, speaker, podcast host, and author of Nice Girls Win, joins the podcast to unpack the invisible rules so many women live by — and what it looks like to choose yourself without blowing up your life. We talk about why being “nice” doesn’t have to mean being a people pleaser, how boundaries can actually make you a better nice girl, and why saying no doesn’t make...

Ilana's recording sick, the Syracuse course is officially over and she's not ready to talk about how much she'll miss it, and she saw Hilary Duff sell out MSG and has a lot of feelings. Two listener questions this week: how many drinks on a first date is too many (she ordered a third before he finished his first, and he was expected to pay), and he said after one great date that he doesn't want to rush into anything long term &mdas...

Amanda Katz joins the podcast to share the story of ending a long-term relationship after realizing her partner never fully grasped that she truly did not want children. We talk about the difference between "maybe someday" and knowing something about yourself since you were eleven years old, why having a child to save a relationship never actually saves it, and the quiet, undramatic weeks when she finally decided the choice was her...

Jordanne Sculler, licensed mental health counselor and relationship therapist, joins the podcast to unpack why so many of us keep repeating the same dating patterns—even when we know they're not working. We talk about the psychology behind unhealthy relationship cycles, why your "type" may actually be keeping you stuck, and how childhood experiences and old stories shape the way you approach love. Jordanne explains why dating...

This week, a 4am pregnancy craving for a discontinued pasta dish spirals into one of the wildest nights of our lives, ending in a comped multi-course meal at Moriah, NYC's #1 Italian seafood restaurant, care of the original chef himself (Chrissy Teigen even weighed in). We check back in on Christmas Party guy, and the update isn't the one we were hoping for. A listener asks how engagement ring shopping actually works, from where to...

After the response to Part 1, we had to do a Part 2. In this solo episode, I'm diving into even more questions that can help you make better dating decisions before you turn to your group chat. I talk about breaking unhealthy patterns, separating your worth from rejection, the difference between closure and wanting a different ending, knowing whether your standards are actually standards or just preferences, building a life you lov...